http://browse.deviantart.com/literature/poetry/humor/ballad/?order=9 deviantART RSS for boost:popular in:literature/poetry/humor/ballad en-us Copyright 2013, deviantART.com Wed, 19 Jun 2013 14:51:23 PDT deviantART.com http://blogs.law.harvard.edu/tech/rss http://st.deviantart.net/minish/widgets/apple-touch-icon-precomposed.png http://klassikko.deviantart.com/art/DESU-72946777 http://klassikko.deviantart.com/art/DESU-72946777 Tue, 25 Dec 2007 12:57:21 PST DESU nonadult literature/poetry/humor/ballad kLassikko http://a.deviantart.net/avatars/k/l/klassikko.jpg Copyright 2007-2013 ~kLassikko http://hereticschizoid.deviantart.com/art/The-Official-Ode-to-the-Forums-11136071 http://hereticschizoid.deviantart.com/art/The-Official-Ode-to-the-Forums-11136071 Mon, 04 Oct 2004 04:57:21 PDT The Official Ode to the Forums nonadult literature/poetry/humor/ballad hereticschizoid http://a.deviantart.net/avatars/h/e/hereticschizoid.gif Copyright 2004-2013 ~hereticschizoid

Enjoy ]]> beating a horse that's already dead.
Do you like "s3ks" and what does art mean?
A :devpoorhorse: cult for illiterate teens.

The forum descriptions must be Greek,
or maybe the newbies only read 1337.
The Welcome Center to get a tour.
Thumbshare Forum for commentwhores.

'Deviator' no longer exists
(The Forum's still there 'cause :devjark: insists)
Don't post there- it's useless you know
Read the thread that tells you so.

Elite ForumWhores: they're better than you.
Accept it now you know it's true;
If you see a lot of the Blank Stare guy
stupidity is the reason why.

For those with a brain that ]]>

Enjoy

]]> http://dr-ten.deviantart.com/art/My-Dead-Lesbian-Dog-13422237 http://dr-ten.deviantart.com/art/My-Dead-Lesbian-Dog-13422237 Thu, 23 Dec 2004 08:30:50 PST My Dead Lesbian Dog nonadult literature/poetry/humor/ballad Dr-Ten http://a.deviantart.net/avatars/d/r/dr-ten.jpg Copyright 2004-2013 ~Dr-Ten Died a sad lesbian death.
She was just drinking egg nog...
Laced with crystal meth.

Because of her over-dose,
She is now lesbian dead,
What I miss most,
Is stroking her lesbian head.

Now she's in doggy heaven,
(More likely doggy hell)
She died at the lesbian age of seven,
Feeling unlesbianly well.

Now she is lesbian gone,
My dinner is her lesbian remains,
And so she'll live on,
In me-- when I eat her lesbian brains! ]]> http://kalahie.deviantart.com/art/a-fairy-tale-for-the-morbid-13817143 http://kalahie.deviantart.com/art/a-fairy-tale-for-the-morbid-13817143 Wed, 05 Jan 2005 00:11:34 PST a fairy tale for the morbid nonadult literature/poetry/humor/ballad kalahie http://a.deviantart.net/avatars/default.gif Copyright 2005-2013 ~kalahie who grabbed on to a squirel
and propmpty fell down a well
when she hit the ground
she looked around
and wondered if she was in hell

to her great surprise
and the squirels sad demise
t'was a black cat that answerd
he ate up the squirel
smiled at the girl
said"nope" and burst into laughter

but then the cats eyes
buldged open wide
and he starteds to heave
see the squirel inside
hants quite died
and he was really quite peeved

that cat started to hurl
and out came that squirel
fur all stick and wet
the cat was quite shocked
the squirel was pissed off
and he had revenge still to get
]]> http://mbryn.deviantart.com/art/Clash-of-the-Twilighters-117554796 http://mbryn.deviantart.com/art/Clash-of-the-Twilighters-117554796 Mon, 30 Mar 2009 00:06:57 PDT Clash of the Twilighters nonadult literature/poetry/humor/ballad MBryn http://a.deviantart.net/avatars/m/b/mbryn.jpg?4 Copyright 2009-2013 *MBryn
LET ME STRESS THAT WHILE I DO NOT LIKE Twilight AND THE SEQUELS, THIS POEM IS MOSTLY ABOUT THE INSANE FANGIRLS THAT ATTEND THE HIGH SCHOOL AT WHICH I WORK.

You are, of course, entitled to your own opinions about the book and the characters. Please don't spam my page with comments about how I'm a terrible person for posting this, and don't fight with anyone who might have an opinion other than yours. Failure to act like mature adults will result in comments being disabled.

Also, if any of the anti-Twilight clubs would like to use this, I give my permission for them to post it on their pages.

That is all. ]]> it's immediately thrown in my face;
hordes of screaming, teenaged girls
who fell in love with the Vampire race.

If they're all scornful of Jacob Black
and jealous of Bella Swan,
and swoon over Edward and all the Cullens,
how much longer can this madness go on?

If I have to see one more shirt
that says, "I Love Sparkly Men"
I swear I'll launch myself to the moon
and I won't come back again.

I'm tired of seeing huge displays
when I visit my favorite bookstore.
As to the movie, don't get me started!
The whole stupid series is a bore.

Whenever I see two girls
dressed head to toe in Twilight gear,
I kn ]]>
LET ME STRESS THAT WHILE I DO NOT LIKE Twilight AND THE SEQUELS, THIS POEM IS MOSTLY ABOUT THE INSANE FANGIRLS THAT ATTEND THE HIGH SCHOOL AT WHICH I WORK.

You are, of course, entitled to your own opinions about the book and the characters. Please don't spam my page with comments about how I'm a terrible person for posting this, and don't fight with anyone who might have an opinion other than yours. Failure to act like mature adults will result in comments being disabled.

Also, if any of the anti-Twilight clubs would like to use this, I give my permission for them to post it on their pages.

That is all. ]]> http://aceospades.deviantart.com/art/Mario-s-my-father-9017103 http://aceospades.deviantart.com/art/Mario-s-my-father-9017103 Sun, 18 Jul 2004 23:02:09 PDT Mario's my father nonadult literature/poetry/humor/ballad AceOSpades http://a.deviantart.net/avatars/a/c/aceospades.gif Copyright 2004-2013 ~AceOSpades ... The lines are a little longer than usual, and the rhythm is different from what I'm used to...If you need ANY of the references explained, lemme know! Enjoy! Comment!

Edit (august 2009) : This poem continues to be BY FAR my most popular thing on this site. Honestly... I'm glad it struck a chord with gamers here, but I'm a little embarrassed by this piece. I think I've gotten a whole lot better since this one in terms of technical form and so on. Maybe this one will be due for a tweaking sometime in the future. ]]> I fought goombas, turtles, and those little wind-up bombs
Sonic is my brother, that little spikey guy
He runs far too fast for your pathetic human eye

You joke "life force is running out!"
And nobody knows what you're talking about
Except for the geeks, they get your bad joke
Crack open another vanilla coke

I remember the days, the days of 2D
Come on and reminisce with me
Those rainy days with sega and snes
Where tricky games would be the test

Now here we are, in great brand new 3D
Big markets, huge games, and lots of money
Large corporations pump them out, fast and quick like water
]]> ... The lines are a little longer than usual, and the rhythm is different from what I'm used to...If you need ANY of the references explained, lemme know! Enjoy! Comment!

Edit (august 2009) : This poem continues to be BY FAR my most popular thing on this site. Honestly... I'm glad it struck a chord with gamers here, but I'm a little embarrassed by this piece. I think I've gotten a whole lot better since this one in terms of technical form and so on. Maybe this one will be due for a tweaking sometime in the future.

]]> http://theladypegasus.deviantart.com/art/Raw-Ale-77405998 http://theladypegasus.deviantart.com/art/Raw-Ale-77405998 Thu, 14 Feb 2008 17:18:02 PST Raw Ale adult literature/poetry/humor/ballad TheLadyPegasus http://a.deviantart.net/avatars/t/h/theladypegasus.gif Copyright 2008-2013 ~TheLadyPegasus Thanks to Three-stitch, Benskies and Amzgal for laughing /with/ me when I read this out to you lot, rather than /at/ me

I've put a warning for mature content on this because... well, he's rolling drink, for one. I'm also not sure how many advisory nazis there are out there and I'd rather play it safe with some of the 'suggestions' in this one

Oh, oh... Also, I lol'd "For it was no great sword I wielded..." Heh heh heh. ]]> I never before did know
Of apple’d cheeks and radiant skin
As faultless as virgin snow.

‘Twas late one eve and I had drowned
Quite deep in ale too raw
When in she strode and caught all eyes
-her likes not seen before.

And at her side a fighter large
(with weapons bared) was seen
All talk and noise soon ceased to flow
In the tavern of the dragon green.

Such a pleasant sight, the lass
That up leapt good sirs three
To offer their seat to the pretty peat
In hope of her company.

As quickly as they had risen,
So they reclaimed their place
When the warrior-born’s blade was drawn ]]> Thanks to Three-stitch, Benskies and Amzgal for laughing /with/ me when I read this out to you lot, rather than /at/ me

I've put a warning for mature content on this because... well, he's rolling drink, for one. I'm also not sure how many advisory nazis there are out there and I'd rather play it safe with some of the 'suggestions' in this one

Oh, oh... Also, I lol'd "For it was no great sword I wielded..." Heh heh heh. ]]> http://widdledwummaboy.deviantart.com/art/Morning-Wood-36286586 http://widdledwummaboy.deviantart.com/art/Morning-Wood-36286586 Thu, 13 Jul 2006 22:27:10 PDT Morning Wood nonadult literature/poetry/humor/ballad WiddleDwummaBoy http://a.deviantart.net/avatars/w/i/widdledwummaboy.jpg Copyright 2006-2013 ~WiddleDwummaBoy So…it’s about my penis. And it goes something like this: ]]>
Morning wood, oh morning wood,
How'd you arise before I did?
Why must you make me walk all funny
Whenever I walk by Dad and Mummy?

It's just too hard to still look cool
Walking into class every day at school
Teacher says "If you can't keep yourself,
By God, then Glue will"

And riding home upon the bus,
I take two seats (for both of us).
At my porch, you've no signs of shying,
I knock on the door without even trying

And now the dogs won't leave you alone
(They've already finished their other bone)
But come dinner time, you're almost dead
And I feel the blood coming back to my head

Before you, I could ju ]]> So…it’s about my penis. And it goes something like this: ]]> http://dandelion-lion.deviantart.com/art/I-d-Hate-to-be-Harry-Potter-149042400 http://dandelion-lion.deviantart.com/art/I-d-Hate-to-be-Harry-Potter-149042400 Sun, 03 Jan 2010 05:35:59 PST I'd Hate to be Harry Potter nonadult literature/poetry/humor/ballad Dandelion-lion http://a.deviantart.net/avatars/d/a/dandelion-lion.gif Copyright 2010-2013 ~Dandelion-lion dantesgirl, at [link] I was some-what inspired...
Just a silly little diddy, I'm pretty sure it's a ballad, but correct me if I'm wrong.
I read the first chapter of the fanfiction mentioned in her article, and this ballad is kinda based off that.

This isn't meant as an attack on anyone in particular, but seriously, wouldn't you be afraid if you were Harry?


Just as a side note, after reading the first book when I was, like 12, I daydreamed about being a Mary Sue (of course, I didn't know the 'technical' term then )


Without further adue, please enjoy my first upload in forever, created out of boredom and lolz. (I do understand that you probibly read this AFTER reading the balled, but that's ok, I'll forgive you)

NB: From my extensive research (google and a japanese translator) 'hana' means 'nose'. ]]> I'd hate to be harry potter,
With glasses, scar and wand.
I know he went to Hogwarts but
That's something I don't want.
I know that he does magic tricks,
And hangs with Dumbledore.
That would be fun if I could stop
The teenage girl author.

I just can't stand the fan fictions
That tell of his new love.
The one Rowling forgot about,
The one that he's dreamed of.
The beauty that is Mary Sue,
(Not based on you, I'm sure).
Who sweeps him off his tortured feet,
The one we must endure.

Forget about Ginny Weasley,
She simply can't compare
To Mary Sue, so beautiful,
With hair so blonde and fair.
Wit ]]> dantesgirl, at [link] I was some-what inspired...
Just a silly little diddy, I'm pretty sure it's a ballad, but correct me if I'm wrong.
I read the first chapter of the fanfiction mentioned in her article, and this ballad is kinda based off that.

This isn't meant as an attack on anyone in particular, but seriously, wouldn't you be afraid if you were Harry?


Just as a side note, after reading the first book when I was, like 12, I daydreamed about being a Mary Sue (of course, I didn't know the 'technical' term then )


Without further adue, please enjoy my first upload in forever, created out of boredom and lolz. (I do understand that you probibly read this AFTER reading the balled, but that's ok, I'll forgive you)

NB: From my extensive research (google and a japanese translator) 'hana' means 'nose'. ]]> http://megaman93.deviantart.com/art/Ahmed-the-dead-terrorist-part1-79020909 http://megaman93.deviantart.com/art/Ahmed-the-dead-terrorist-part1-79020909 Mon, 03 Mar 2008 12:27:46 PST Ahmed the dead terrorist part1 nonadult literature/poetry/humor/ballad megaman93 http://a.deviantart.net/avatars/m/e/megaman93.png?1 Copyright 2008-2013 ~megaman93 -Good evening... infidel!
-So you are a terrorist?
-Yes I'm a terrorist!
-What kind of terrorist?
-A terryfing... terrorist!... Are you scared?
-Not really, no
-Bleeeee! And now?
-Not really, no
-EHEEEE! How 'bout now?
-No
-God damn it! Oh! O! I mean: Allah damn it!... SILENCE! I'll kill you!
-So Achmed..
-No, no, it's A*gh*med
-That's what I said
-No, you said Achmed, Agh, gh, gh! SILENCE! I'll kill you!
-How do you spell it?
-What?
-How do you spell your name?
-Well, let's see... A..C..Phlegm... SILENCE! I'll kill you!
-So Achmed you are a terrorist. I would suppose you have sort of speciality?
-Y ]]> http://nevershoutashlyn.deviantart.com/art/know-I-m-L-149786526 http://nevershoutashlyn.deviantart.com/art/know-I-m-L-149786526 Sat, 09 Jan 2010 08:07:01 PST know I'm L nonadult literature/poetry/humor/ballad NeverShoutAshlyn http://a.deviantart.net/avatars/n/e/nevershoutashlyn.gif?2 Copyright 2010-2013 ~NeverShoutAshlyn entry for the death note music contest. wish me luck everyone... ]]> Music...
Artists...
L Lawliet...
Know I'm L...

...

I wake up every evenin'
with my legs up in my face
and they're never ever out of place

and I'm still always working
while I eat tea and frosting paste
and I know how good that tastes

when you see my face
hope you know I'm L
hope you know I'm L

when you walk my way
hope you know I'm L
hope you know I'm L

has there ever been a man
that is so smart
and treats you like hell?

i'm just so cool
like that and i can solve crime
like, really well

I know that I can't sing very good
because I've never seen you fall so hard
do you know where you are?

truth be told, ]]> entry for the death note music contest. wish me luck everyone... ]]> http://mbryn.deviantart.com/art/Clash-of-the-Twilighters-v-2-127672943 http://mbryn.deviantart.com/art/Clash-of-the-Twilighters-v-2-127672943 Mon, 29 Jun 2009 11:28:16 PDT Clash of the Twilighters v.2 nonadult literature/poetry/humor/ballad MBryn http://a.deviantart.net/avatars/m/b/mbryn.jpg?4 Copyright 2009-2013 *MBryn [link]

Let me make something clear: This is a poem about the scary fans of Twilight I have come across in my daily life. Yes, there is some commentary about the books and the characters, but ultimately it's the uber-scary fans (the ones who threaten to kill you for hating the series) that this is meant to mock. No offense is meant to the normal fans who just enjoy reading the series and can accept it has both strengths and weaknesses.

As always, you are welcome to disagree with me; this is just my opinion and is in no way more or less valid than anything someone else might say. I will be mature about it if you will, otherwise flames will be used to heat the water for my morning showers.

I don't own Twilight (Stephenie Meyers does) but if I did, I would have made a lot of changes. ]]> it’s immediately thrown in my face:
hordes of screaming teenaged girls
in love with the Vampire race.

They’re all scornful of Jacob Black,
and jealous of perfect Bella Swan,
and swoon over Edward and the Cullens,
how long will this obsession go on?

If I have to see one more shirt
that says, I Love Sparkly Men,
I swear I’ll launch myself to the moon
so I won’t have to see them again.

I’m tired of seeing huge displays
when I walk into Borders Bookstore.
As for the movie, don’t get me started:
the entire thing was a sparkling bore.

Whenever I see two teenage girls
dresse ]]> [link]

Let me make something clear: This is a poem about the scary fans of Twilight I have come across in my daily life. Yes, there is some commentary about the books and the characters, but ultimately it's the uber-scary fans (the ones who threaten to kill you for hating the series) that this is meant to mock. No offense is meant to the normal fans who just enjoy reading the series and can accept it has both strengths and weaknesses.

As always, you are welcome to disagree with me; this is just my opinion and is in no way more or less valid than anything someone else might say. I will be mature about it if you will, otherwise flames will be used to heat the water for my morning showers.

I don't own Twilight (Stephenie Meyers does) but if I did, I would have made a lot of changes. ]]> http://neartastic.deviantart.com/art/Night-before-Christmas-sort-of-106169087 http://neartastic.deviantart.com/art/Night-before-Christmas-sort-of-106169087 Fri, 12 Dec 2008 17:26:56 PST Night before Christmas sort of nonadult literature/poetry/humor/ballad Neartastic http://a.deviantart.net/avatars/n/e/neartastic.jpg?4 Copyright 2008-2013 ~Neartastic 's christmas contest. The theme was The Earl vs Santa so I spoofed the poem Twas the Night Before Christmas. Yeah I made this while I was sick so if it's not good don't blame me.

D. Gray-man does not belong to me
Twas the Night before Christmas was not written by me
I give The-Noah-Clan permission to use this because it's for their contest. ]]> The Earl was stirring and throwing a tantrum.
The Clan was sitting by the table waiting for their feast
But old Milleny was growling like a beast.

When young Road piped up “You're angry. What's the cause?”
The old creature bellowed “It's that fool Santa Clause!”
There were collective gasps about the room,
And though the voices clamored and made a boom

“What do you have against that big red guy?”
Was one loud cry.
Why it was Road looking all red with flush.
The Earl turned on her with a rush

“He is too Jolly and must be killed.”
]]> 's christmas contest. The theme was The Earl vs Santa so I spoofed the poem Twas the Night Before Christmas. Yeah I made this while I was sick so if it's not good don't blame me.

D. Gray-man does not belong to me
Twas the Night before Christmas was not written by me
I give The-Noah-Clan permission to use this because it's for their contest. ]]> http://chaosfive55.deviantart.com/art/Ballad-Of-A-Disturbed-Minstrel-146784092 http://chaosfive55.deviantart.com/art/Ballad-Of-A-Disturbed-Minstrel-146784092 Mon, 14 Dec 2009 15:25:20 PST Ballad Of A Disturbed Minstrel nonadult literature/poetry/humor/ballad chaosfive55 http://a.deviantart.net/avatars/c/h/chaosfive55.jpg?2 Copyright 2009-2013 *chaosfive55 ]]> As I stumbled up o'er the last high dune
Of a desert deep in a forest cold---
Before me there sparkled a Sea of gold!

A Sea of Gold--how I shook with fear
For I knew 'twas that magical Lake of Beer
Of which wizards mumble, when deep in their cups
--On the shore of that sea frolicked Basilisk pups!

Six Basilisk puppies, of an aspect most vile
Each grinning like a drunken crocodile
As they slithered and skipped on the silvery shore
--My torn-out innards begged for more!

But I drew my sword with a valiant sneeze
And I sliced up those brutes with ridiculous ease
'Til the silver sands sizzled wit ]]> ]]> http://error732.deviantart.com/art/The-Poem-w-an-Eating-Disorder-60076137 http://error732.deviantart.com/art/The-Poem-w-an-Eating-Disorder-60076137 Wed, 18 Jul 2007 09:27:24 PDT The Poem w. an Eating Disorder nonadult literature/poetry/humor/ballad Error732 http://a.deviantart.net/avatars/e/r/error732.png Copyright 2007-2013 ~Error732
Ridiculous? Yes.

. . . but if ridiculous is your style, check out my inspiration:

[link]


Thanks and apologies to =BornBlitzed ]]> It ceased to eat.  Refused all further verse.
It hid its form in anorexic shame,
Convinced of girth it needed to reverse.

Our writing exercises weren't enough;
It had to starve itself, to fast, it thought,
Rejecting words as poor, unhealthy fluff,
Irrational ideals I often fought.

When finally it took to words, it gorged,
Devouring ev'ry phrase I chanced to write;
As thoughts were had, so, too, were verses forged,
With not a hint of order left in sight.

At last, its swollen stanzas stopped to purge;
Revision by catharsis stopped its growth,
And, after having pleased this anxious urge,
I ]]>
Ridiculous? Yes.

. . . but if ridiculous is your style, check out my inspiration:

[link]


Thanks and apologies to =BornBlitzed ]]> http://kerushii-sushi.deviantart.com/art/A-Short-Anti-Sanjaya-Poem-51994144 http://kerushii-sushi.deviantart.com/art/A-Short-Anti-Sanjaya-Poem-51994144 Thu, 29 Mar 2007 18:22:58 PDT A Short Anti-Sanjaya Poem nonadult literature/poetry/humor/ballad kerushii-sushi http://a.deviantart.net/avatars/k/e/kerushii-sushi.gif?6 Copyright 2007-2013 ~kerushii-sushi
Poem is mine, Sanjaya belongs to himself, image found on Google, etc.

Enjoy! ]]>
Simon is green
Paula is blue
Sanjaya, you suck
And your hair won't save you ]]>
Poem is mine, Sanjaya belongs to himself, image found on Google, etc.

Enjoy!

]]> http://monkeyfoo3.deviantart.com/art/7-Things-Parody-93822965 http://monkeyfoo3.deviantart.com/art/7-Things-Parody-93822965 Mon, 04 Aug 2008 16:25:43 PDT 7 Things - Parody nonadult literature/poetry/humor/ballad monkeyfoo3 http://a.deviantart.net/avatars/m/o/monkeyfoo3.jpg?2 Copyright 2008-2013 ~monkeyfoo3 Ew…
Ew…

I probably shouldn't say this
But sometimes when I’m hungry
I think about the previous
Relationship we've shared

It was awesome, but we lost it
It’s not possible for me not to eat
Now I’m standing in the kitchen
And you probably won’t listen to what I say, my fridge

The 7 things I hate inside you
The 7 things I hate inside you
In you
Broccoli, Corn,  Peas, Soy, that’s for sure
Fruit makes my tummy churn
The food you store, makes me cry
Organic stuff is all Mom buy’s
Sugar-Free ice cream
It makes me sick, I can’t take one lick
I wanna be with the food I ]]> http://sara4sidle.deviantart.com/art/My-Own-Answers-151467396 http://sara4sidle.deviantart.com/art/My-Own-Answers-151467396 Sat, 23 Jan 2010 11:52:10 PST My Own Answers nonadult literature/poetry/humor/ballad Sara4Sidle http://a.deviantart.net/avatars/s/a/sara4sidle.gif?7 Copyright 2010-2013 ~Sara4Sidle @Sara_Bugden
Got 92%. My analysis could have been better.
Mr. Klatt said it was deliciously defiant lol

Yep, I felt like I should have handed in something that was less joke-y and more serious.. but that's not how I was feeling so.. Yeah ]]> With lots of hidden meaning
But I can't write like that
For all the wrong reasons

Things should be straight
And right to the point
No misunderstanding
Getting your nose out of joint

If I want to say something
I'll say it out right
Love really sucks
It's mostly just fights

Love in a poem?
That's never been done
Because writing about heartache
Is always such fun

But what can I say?
I don't know about love
Go in for a hug
And it turns into a shove

Star-crossed lovers
Running around like fiends
I don't actually know
What any of it means

Although I have an idea
From watching Soap Operas
You date seven ]]>
Got 92%. My analysis could have been better.
Mr. Klatt said it was deliciously defiant lol

Yep, I felt like I should have handed in something that was less joke-y and more serious.. but that's not how I was feeling so.. Yeah ]]> http://gpotious.deviantart.com/art/Toaster-Bread-132146569 http://gpotious.deviantart.com/art/Toaster-Bread-132146569 Tue, 04 Aug 2009 17:07:05 PDT Toaster.Bread nonadult literature/poetry/humor/ballad Gpotious http://a.deviantart.net/avatars/g/p/gpotious.png?8 Copyright 2009-2013 ~Gpotious
EDIT: Seeing as people like it, okay, not really bad... Just feels like it because it's so outlandish and strange and even if I looked at it a thousand times I noticed that there's a seventh syllable on the 12th stanza. NOT GOOD. :C



This is for Inkwell, the delicious Creative Writing club of our school. 8D Our task: make a poem of what life would be like from the view of an ordinary household appliance.

well, I love bread. And since on Neopets I had my Toaster-techo, Nikello, who ever so often would squeak a "Ding!" it was quick inspiration for the first few stanzas~



Anyways, enjoy everyone!
]]> My preferred word is “Ding!”
And every breakfast,
The bread comes, visiting.

They never stay long,
Perhaps it’s just too hot.
I wish a minute
A time they will stay not.

Giant, fleshy hands
Come with a knife and plate,
Taking them away.
Another morning, I wait.

My name is Toaster,
My preferred word is “Ding!”
And every breakfast,
“Tick,” each second, I sing.

That timer beside
The humans always turn
Then when my song’s done,
They check the bread for burns.

What happens to toast,
That morning company?
Well, humans eat them,
A horrid sight to see.

My name is Toast ]]>
EDIT: Seeing as people like it, okay, not really bad... Just feels like it because it's so outlandish and strange and even if I looked at it a thousand times I noticed that there's a seventh syllable on the 12th stanza. NOT GOOD. :C



This is for Inkwell, the delicious Creative Writing club of our school. 8D Our task: make a poem of what life would be like from the view of an ordinary household appliance.

well, I love bread. And since on Neopets I had my Toaster-techo, Nikello, who ever so often would squeak a "Ding!" it was quick inspiration for the first few stanzas~



Anyways, enjoy everyone!
]]> http://aandltwins.deviantart.com/art/The-Catholic-Yaoi-Anthem-151581396 http://aandltwins.deviantart.com/art/The-Catholic-Yaoi-Anthem-151581396 Sun, 24 Jan 2010 08:47:23 PST The Catholic Yaoi Anthem nonadult literature/poetry/humor/ballad AandLtwins http://a.deviantart.net/avatars/a/a/aandltwins.jpg?1 Copyright 2010-2013 ~AandLtwins http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-nd/3.0/ Ayla:
Yay first devinition of 2010!!!!!!
I wrote this to that old catholic song

Jesus loves me this I know
For the Bible tells me so
Little ones to him belong
They are weak, but he is strong
Yes Jesus loves me
Yes Jesus loves me
Yes Jesus loves me
The Bible tells me so

I was just talking to my friend and my sister the other day about how we're going to hell for the amount of yaoi we read, watch, and write. Then I came up with this. I hope it doesn't offend anyone- except for maybe homophobes, because I honestly don't give a shit if I offend them. Anyways enjoy.
Btw:
1) Please no flagging.
2) If I offened you, then sorry
3) Please no flaming- don't waste your time, I don't take flames to heart. They're just a waste of comment space.
4) I'm not sure the original song is copyrighted, but yeah the tune belongs to whoever came up with it. ]]>
I will rot in Hell I know
For the Bible tells me so
I see yaoi day to day
and the Bible said it's wrong to be gay
So God has condemned me
God has condemned me
God has condemned me
The Bible tells me so
Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha!

I will burn after I die
because I like guy on guy
the Bible said that yaoi's wrong
so I changed the words to this song
God has condemned me!
God has condemned me!
God has condemned me!
The Bible tells me so.
Ho! Ho! Ho! Ho!

I will roast just like a pig
Cause the bible's bigoted
For the love of sodomy
Damn it all, to hell with me
God has condemned me!
God has condemned ]]> Ayla:
Yay first devinition of 2010!!!!!!
I wrote this to that old catholic song

Jesus loves me this I know
For the Bible tells me so
Little ones to him belong
They are weak, but he is strong
Yes Jesus loves me
Yes Jesus loves me
Yes Jesus loves me
The Bible tells me so

I was just talking to my friend and my sister the other day about how we're going to hell for the amount of yaoi we read, watch, and write. Then I came up with this. I hope it doesn't offend anyone- except for maybe homophobes, because I honestly don't give a shit if I offend them. Anyways enjoy.
Btw:
1) Please no flagging.
2) If I offened you, then sorry
3) Please no flaming- don't waste your time, I don't take flames to heart. They're just a waste of comment space.
4) I'm not sure the original song is copyrighted, but yeah the tune belongs to whoever came up with it. ]]> http://pistachio-god.deviantart.com/art/One-Day-I-Was-a-Toaster-23356675 http://pistachio-god.deviantart.com/art/One-Day-I-Was-a-Toaster-23356675 Mon, 26 Sep 2005 07:04:47 PDT One Day I Was a Toaster nonadult literature/poetry/humor/ballad pistachio-god http://a.deviantart.net/avatars/p/i/pistachio-god.gif Copyright 2005-2013 ~pistachio-god
One day a was a toaster
As proud as proud can be
And as I traversed the purple plains,
I met a laughing tree.

'Hello, how are you today?
Please tell me a funny joke-
Let it be happy and none at all sad,'
Boomed the mighty oak.

'A wonderful story in mind,' said I
As I sat upon a root
'You will not have heard it yet,
Concerning a man, a bug and a boot.'

The tree looked jolly, as he spoke
'Well done, it sounds already funny.
Does it just surround a man, bug and boot,
Or involve stories of money and honey?"

'No, good sir, it does not
Go into further tales as such,
It is just a man, a bug and a boot
Not ]]> http://mbryn.deviantart.com/art/Paper-or-Plastic-117276347 http://mbryn.deviantart.com/art/Paper-or-Plastic-117276347 Fri, 27 Mar 2009 11:20:17 PDT Paper or Plastic? nonadult literature/poetry/humor/ballad MBryn http://a.deviantart.net/avatars/m/b/mbryn.jpg?4 Copyright 2009-2013 *MBryn contest!

The prompt for this one was "Paper or plastic?"

Look, it's in ballad format and not free verse!

Anyway, enjoy! ]]> Why is it always the same?
Some people call it a serious matter
while others call it merely a game.

Paper or plastic, paper or plastic,
it’s what you have to consider
when you pull fancy items off of the self
and your heart goes all a-twitter.

Paper or plastic, paper or plastic,
everyone knows you have to choose.
But no one can tell you which one is better
and which one would cause you to lose.

Paper or plastic, paper or plastic,
what would the wise men say?
Would they say plastic is better right now
and to save paper for a rainy day?

Paper or plastic, paper or plastic,
why is this cho ]]> contest!

The prompt for this one was "Paper or plastic?"

Look, it's in ballad format and not free verse!

Anyway, enjoy! ]]> http://mrsbamonte.deviantart.com/art/Unicorns-Dragons-25218747 http://mrsbamonte.deviantart.com/art/Unicorns-Dragons-25218747 Sun, 13 Nov 2005 22:49:03 PST Unicorns + Dragons nonadult literature/poetry/humor/ballad MrsBamonte http://a.deviantart.net/avatars/m/r/mrsbamonte.jpg Copyright 2005-2013 ~MrsBamonte
-Balloons
-Ponies
-Unicorns with horns glittering in the dusk
-Dragons with magical scales that heal any wound

Enjoy. =] ]]> I couldn't afford food so she was real bony
So I fed her a balloon and she kinda exploded
She became a unicorn with a horn glitter-coated

We teamed up for quests
We were better than the rest

But one day I fell down
My head split right through my crown
My unicorn dragged me to a dragon
In some sort of strange wagon

The dragon took care of me
It was even all for free
Her scales were funny
They could change into money [That would heal ME]

So when I left her cave
It was my life that she saved
And I never fell down again. ]]>
-Balloons
-Ponies
-Unicorns with horns glittering in the dusk
-Dragons with magical scales that heal any wound

Enjoy. =] ]]> http://i-e-m-s.deviantart.com/art/Riddle-the-Answer-7969964 http://i-e-m-s.deviantart.com/art/Riddle-the-Answer-7969964 Wed, 09 Jun 2004 17:15:09 PDT Riddle the Answer nonadult literature/poetry/humor/ballad i-e-m-s http://a.deviantart.net/avatars/i/_/i-e-m-s.gif Copyright 2004-2013 ~i-e-m-s to a world of contradiction and riddles
where silence is the loudest sound
and romance is bittersweet

To where the mute sings
falling hailing rain
dancing a walk
and pleasurable pain

Hear the birds chirp words
see a frowning smile
gentle aggresive tears
that flows down clumsily

So I say unto you
live in a world where the moon is bright as the sun
own mirrors that reflect nothing
and expirience delightful sorrow ]]> http://thewolfladytala.deviantart.com/art/The-Ballad-of-Buff-McBufferson-144973089 http://thewolfladytala.deviantart.com/art/The-Ballad-of-Buff-McBufferson-144973089 Fri, 27 Nov 2009 13:57:33 PST The Ballad of Buff McBufferson nonadult literature/poetry/humor/ballad TheWolfLadyTala http://a.deviantart.net/avatars/t/h/thewolfladytala.png?5 Copyright 2009-2013 =TheWolfLadyTala

This was surprisingly difficult to write but I like it

It's for this contest: [link]

...I don't think this is in actual ballad format by the way oh well! ]]> In the days of yore,
There lived a man of strength.

He knew no bounds
Loved violence--how
He loved to punch in your face.

Now this was a time
When kindness was crime
And the law made pussies screwed,

So the sammich was made
Man, weren't they great?
Why, yes, they were really damn good!

Well as I was saying
This man went a'praying
For someone to tackle and fight,

When, what do you know?
Out in the snow
McBufferson saw the light.

Striding ahead
(He thought he was dead)
He was ready to punch out whoever

Thought he was tough
And had killed McBuff
What fool thought he was so clever?

Well as it so happens
While my ]]>

This was surprisingly difficult to write but I like it

It's for this contest: [link]

...I don't think this is in actual ballad format by the way oh well! ]]> http://kanewolf001.deviantart.com/art/Muffins-Are-Just-Ugly-Cupcakes-93387989 http://kanewolf001.deviantart.com/art/Muffins-Are-Just-Ugly-Cupcakes-93387989 Thu, 31 Jul 2008 12:00:52 PDT Muffins Are Just Ugly Cupcakes nonadult literature/poetry/humor/ballad kanewolf001 http://a.deviantart.net/avatars/k/a/kanewolf001.jpg Copyright 2008-2013 ~kanewolf001
Preview pic done by my friend . Check out her stuff, it rocks. ]]> Then what are muffins...........are they muffed ins?
Or what are they? I'll tell you what they are, they're confuzzled cakes.
Make up your mind you stupid muffins, how dare you try to defile the name of the glorious cupcake! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !
How dare you try and impersonate the precious glory of our loving cupcake?!
How dare you, you sick, twisted muffins. ]]>
Preview pic done by my friend . Check out her stuff, it rocks.

]]> http://tori-margaret.deviantart.com/art/bacon-75538719 http://tori-margaret.deviantart.com/art/bacon-75538719 Fri, 25 Jan 2008 01:25:38 PST bacon nonadult literature/poetry/humor/ballad tori-margaret http://a.deviantart.net/avatars/t/o/tori-margaret.gif Copyright 2008-2013 ~tori-margaret and sweetie they won't finish until your bones' gone.
they're cute and cuddly when their tiny and pink
but unless their stuffies, honey, they stink.
650 pounds, but that won't last
'cause we'll do like barbarians did in the past
with the shot of a gun or swing of an ax
baby for breakfast we're having Piggy's back ]]> http://candy-coupe.deviantart.com/art/I-m-Bored-54736535 http://candy-coupe.deviantart.com/art/I-m-Bored-54736535 Sat, 05 May 2007 21:25:09 PDT I'm Bored nonadult literature/poetry/humor/ballad Candy-Coupe http://a.deviantart.net/avatars/c/a/candy-coupe.jpg?3 Copyright 2007-2013 ~Candy-Coupe
Just kidding. I don't smoke.

DRHs, Chick Hicks, Mack and Lightning McQueen (c) Pixar
Teh poem (c) me

NOTE: I've also submitted this poem on Fanfiction.net. ]]> And so damn tired,
And all my coupons
Are expired
So what to do?
I yell out loud:
"BOOST, YOU DOPE,
YOU MUST BE PROUD
To waste my cash!
One by one!
While I'm asleep
Under the sun!
While I'm asleep
At the wheel!
Gawd, you fag,
Let's make a deal!
If you be nice
And give 'em back
(The coupons, that is)
You get to eat Mack."
Boost's jaw drops.
"OH MY GOD!
You'd do that for me?"
"Of course, you clod.
Now hurry up
And get the dosh,
Or else you get
Christine's Carwash!"
"Christine?!" he yelps.
"Her wash is BLOOD!
Not soapy water!
Not even mud!"
"Tough!" I sneer.
"Now hurry up!"
"All right," he squeaks, ]]>
Just kidding. I don't smoke.

DRHs, Chick Hicks, Mack and Lightning McQueen (c) Pixar
Teh poem (c) me

NOTE: I've also submitted this poem on Fanfiction.net. ]]> http://dragonsmithy.deviantart.com/art/Bobblefleep-52580143 http://dragonsmithy.deviantart.com/art/Bobblefleep-52580143 Fri, 06 Apr 2007 12:34:30 PDT Bobblefleep nonadult literature/poetry/humor/ballad Dragonsmithy http://a.deviantart.net/avatars/d/r/dragonsmithy.gif Copyright 2007-2013 ~Dragonsmithy And gnash me with thy greep,
For bargled is thy frogorn face;
Thy wark is bobblefleep!

The grumptious beast beyond my bed,
It with a gruntle gropes,
And if thy snurk is home from work
It slurples down thy soaps.

To weeble at thy nobbly norgs,
I froop upon the krud.
Thy nubble face is in my dregs,
Thy hork is in my blood!

Beware my funk thou rictious lunk,
And hear my slippy squish!
I care not for thy sniffy glorp,
Nor for thy troodled fish.

O pelter me with burgundy!
My ooguts must you keep,
For bargled is thy frogorn face;
Thy wark is bobblefleep! ]]> http://hiphopprincess8.deviantart.com/art/Banana-Pancakes-30801304 http://hiphopprincess8.deviantart.com/art/Banana-Pancakes-30801304 Thu, 23 Mar 2006 21:33:33 PST Banana Pancakes nonadult literature/poetry/humor/ballad HipHopPrincess8 http://a.deviantart.net/avatars/h/i/hiphopprincess8.jpg Copyright 2006-2013 ~HipHopPrincess8 PoetryPlease

Its not my normal style....its more just for laughs but enjoy ]]> She's really kind of kooky, and her habits are quite weird.

I get up in the morning, and just to my surprise,
she's cooking banana pancake, those things I just despise.

I hate banana pancake, they really make me sick,
I just don't want to eat them, must think of something quick.

She's coming to the table, the pancakes piled high,
I know I have to eat them, I think I'm gonna die.

She sets them on the table, making me a plate,
How shall I ever eat them, this is a dreadful fate.

She passes me the butter, and the gooey syrup too,
I know I have to take a bite, oh what shall I d ]]> PoetryPlease

Its not my normal style....its more just for laughs but enjoy ]]> http://parchemin.deviantart.com/art/Ode-a-ma-graisse-135140005 http://parchemin.deviantart.com/art/Ode-a-ma-graisse-135140005 Sat, 29 Aug 2009 04:18:31 PDT Ode a ma graisse nonadult literature/poetry/humor/ballad Parchemin http://a.deviantart.net/avatars/p/a/parchemin.jpg?3 Copyright 2009-2013 ~Parchemin
Et bien sûr cela est un homage au sieur Boulet, qui a fait une super chanson sur ce sujet, mais que j'arrive pas à retrouver dans ses notes (en fait si, merci Google) [link] ]]>
Depuis toujours on me dit
Manges moins, tu vas grossir.
Et ça vraiment je le crie,
Ca me donne envie de haïr

Refrain

J'aime les frites, le coca, les plats élaborés.
Les asperges aussi, accompagnées de mayonnaise
Je ne vois pas pourquoi je devrais me contenter
De saloperies allégées au goût de synthèse.

Couplet

Ca fait longtemps que je le sais
Le modèle, c'est l'anorexique.
Et moi, qui refuse de me priver
Je passe pour la pire des excentriques.

Refrain

J'aime la glace, les biscuits, le chocolats
Les petits légumes, avec une bonne viande
Si on me propose un fromag ]]>
Et bien sûr cela est un homage au sieur Boulet, qui a fait une super chanson sur ce sujet, mais que j'arrive pas à retrouver dans ses notes (en fait si, merci Google) [link] ]]> http://tyrobia.deviantart.com/art/A-Day-In-the-Life-of-106840237 http://tyrobia.deviantart.com/art/A-Day-In-the-Life-of-106840237 Sat, 20 Dec 2008 00:21:38 PST A Day In the Life of... nonadult literature/poetry/humor/ballad Tyrobia http://a.deviantart.net/avatars/t/y/tyrobia.gif Copyright 2008-2013 ~Tyrobia A Day in the Life of the Fat Man. But deviantart doesn't allow me to use that many characters in a title...gar...

725 Words
138 lines

Warning! Contains Mild Language!

I conjured up a funny little poem answering the age old question: "What if your mall Santa WAS the real Santa Claus?" and the other one: "What's Santa Claus like?"

This isn't really that dark, persé. It's more along the lines of mean and angry. It becomes dark because it might ruin the mood for some kiddies with high Christmas spirits. Oh well...enjoy!

::EDIT::

I fixed this poem like I've been wanting to do for so long! I rushed it to get it turned in on time, but now I spent my entire shift at work tweaking it into what I thought would be better.

Changes:

- Last two lines of stanzas are now at 7-5 syllables.
- Changed Justin Garcia to Jake Fisher
- Shortened Timothy to Tim
- Shortened poem from 783 words to 725 words.
- Actually called him something other than "the fat man" in the narration.
- Other small changes that you can get just reading it

::EDIT (again)::
Entered this little puppy in the Dark Christmas 2 contest hosted by and . This contest is closed. It didn't place :"( ]]> the fat man said.
Cindy Lou said with joy, “A
fire truck that’s red!”

“A fire truck, eh?”
the fat man pondered.
He nodded and she bounced on
his knee from under.

He brushed his mighty beard
and then he exclaimed,
“You’ve been a great girl this year,
A wonderful dame!

"Today, it's you're luck! I’ll give
you that fire truck!”

~

“And what would you like for Christmas?”
the fat man howled.
Greg Maybell said with a smile,
“I want a Chow Chow!”

“A puppy, huh?” he said
with a strange look.
He reached behi ]]> A Day in the Life of the Fat Man. But deviantart doesn't allow me to use that many characters in a title...gar...

725 Words
138 lines

Warning! Contains Mild Language!

I conjured up a funny little poem answering the age old question: "What if your mall Santa WAS the real Santa Claus?" and the other one: "What's Santa Claus like?"

This isn't really that dark, persé. It's more along the lines of mean and angry. It becomes dark because it might ruin the mood for some kiddies with high Christmas spirits. Oh well...enjoy!

::EDIT::

I fixed this poem like I've been wanting to do for so long! I rushed it to get it turned in on time, but now I spent my entire shift at work tweaking it into what I thought would be better.

Changes:

- Last two lines of stanzas are now at 7-5 syllables.
- Changed Justin Garcia to Jake Fisher
- Shortened Timothy to Tim
- Shortened poem from 783 words to 725 words.
- Actually called him something other than "the fat man" in the narration.
- Other small changes that you can get just reading it

::EDIT (again)::
Entered this little puppy in the Dark Christmas 2 contest hosted by and . This contest is closed. It didn't place :"( ]]> http://czatan.deviantart.com/art/Walentynki-2008-77315488 http://czatan.deviantart.com/art/Walentynki-2008-77315488 Wed, 13 Feb 2008 17:25:02 PST Walentynki 2008 adult literature/poetry/humor/ballad czatan http://a.deviantart.net/avatars/c/z/czatan.jpg Copyright 2008-2013 ~czatan Wszyscy sa cukierkowi a ja pierdole konwencje ;D Na odwrot tez moze byc zabawnie

Wulgarne slownictwo - nie chcesz nie czytaj

Jesli ktos poczul sie urazony - mam to gdzies Moja tworczosc nie wyraza moich pogladow, gdyby tak bylo musial bym mordowac, gwalcic i byc skurwysynem ;3

A jestem kochany conieeeee :* ? ]]> Wiec w ten dzień szczególny, mam odmienne plany
Dzionek przywitasz z podbitym okiem
potem cię zmuszę, do mycia okien

później śniadanie, zrobisz dla misia
lepiej nie wkurwiaj mnie suko dzisiaj
spróbuj przesolić to ci wpierdole
dawaj żreć kurwo, czekam przy stole

potem poranne, robienie loda
nie masz dziś szczęścia, ojejku, szkoda
hapaj go dziwko, po same jadra
I co? Nie jesteś już taka mądra?

Kiedy już w przełyk, twój zatankuje
po piwo pójdziesz, dziś kibicuje
polska meczyk ]]> Wszyscy sa cukierkowi a ja pierdole konwencje ;D Na odwrot tez moze byc zabawnie

Wulgarne slownictwo - nie chcesz nie czytaj

Jesli ktos poczul sie urazony - mam to gdzies Moja tworczosc nie wyraza moich pogladow, gdyby tak bylo musial bym mordowac, gwalcic i byc skurwysynem ;3

A jestem kochany conieeeee :* ? ]]> http://aceospades.deviantart.com/art/The-Psychiatrist-23682396 http://aceospades.deviantart.com/art/The-Psychiatrist-23682396 Wed, 05 Oct 2005 00:21:53 PDT The Psychiatrist nonadult literature/poetry/humor/ballad AceOSpades http://a.deviantart.net/avatars/a/c/aceospades.gif Copyright 2005-2013 ~AceOSpades The secretary's wearing pink
It's twelve o'clock, work starts at ten
It seems the doctor's late again

At twelve fifteen, he does appear
On his breath, the smell of beer
Hung over from the night before
He goes inside and slams the door

As he's hanging up his coat
He sees a little post-it note
Where his secretary scrawled
That a couple patients called

At one o'clock, he does begin
One by one, he calls them in
He sits them down upon the chair
And then he just pretends to care

And while the stupid people grovel
He used to take notes for his novel
Forget this "being confidential"
These stories a ]]>

]]> http://anklesneeze.deviantart.com/art/The-Poet-Warrior-151490871 http://anklesneeze.deviantart.com/art/The-Poet-Warrior-151490871 Sat, 23 Jan 2010 15:01:56 PST The Poet Warrior nonadult literature/poetry/humor/ballad anklesneeze http://a.deviantart.net/avatars/a/n/anklesneeze.jpg?2 Copyright 2010-2013 ~anklesneeze This time I was looking to poke fun at how serious an artist can take himself, which I have been guilty of myself. The poet is of course rewarded for his arrogance by an early demise. I also wanted to have fun incorporating the various names of types of poetry in my story. The pleasure I take in constant rhyming is a bit perverse at times but its all for fun. Please let me know if you enjoyed it thanks! ]]>
A poet went into battle to learn of its thrill,
His one choice of weapon was merely a quill,
First he faced a goblin, he quoted it some verse,
It screamed on hearing it and left with a curse.

Then he happened upon a madman, who often would vomit,
Quickly he healed up its mind by reciting a sonnet.
Impressed with himself he sought harder to beat foes,
So he brushed up his skills reciting some prose.

Next came a warty troll he assaulted with Haiku's
He walked away wearing some warty skin shoes.
A thug it surprised him, he could not think of a poem.
So out with a bad joke, it died from the groan.

So proudly the poet ]]> This time I was looking to poke fun at how serious an artist can take himself, which I have been guilty of myself. The poet is of course rewarded for his arrogance by an early demise. I also wanted to have fun incorporating the various names of types of poetry in my story. The pleasure I take in constant rhyming is a bit perverse at times but its all for fun. Please let me know if you enjoyed it thanks! ]]> http://cosmo1996.deviantart.com/art/A-messed-up-poem-150640445 http://cosmo1996.deviantart.com/art/A-messed-up-poem-150640445 Sat, 16 Jan 2010 13:20:07 PST A messed up poem nonadult literature/poetry/humor/ballad cosmo1996 http://a.deviantart.net/avatars/c/o/cosmo1996.png?4 Copyright 2010-2013 ~cosmo1996 She talks over people and will not shut up!

I really don't like her. Once my wrist was hurting, like broken hurting. And I was talking to Haley and Rita grabbed my wrist so she could talk to her. Now she like hates us all and wishes we will all go to hell. ]]>
you make me sick

I want to beat you with a brick

When you are around us I gather my evil thoughts

Evil plans...Evil plots

I smile when I think these each day

I wish you would go, but you stay

I'm sorry about the way I think

But Rita, you make our lives stink. ]]> She talks over people and will not shut up!

I really don't like her. Once my wrist was hurting, like broken hurting. And I was talking to Haley and Rita grabbed my wrist so she could talk to her. Now she like hates us all and wishes we will all go to hell. ]]> http://thistlewood.deviantart.com/art/jury-nullification-130241560 http://thistlewood.deviantart.com/art/jury-nullification-130241560 Mon, 20 Jul 2009 14:36:21 PDT jury nullification nonadult literature/poetry/humor/ballad thistlewood http://a.deviantart.net/avatars/t/h/thistlewood.png?3 Copyright 2009-2013 ~thistlewood ]]> behind him and i stabbed him
between his thoracic cage and i
watched him seize the ground
like he was kissing his mother.
i watched him bleed for a few minutes
and i watched him beg and i watched him
cry and i watched him struggle when he
tried to crawl and i watched him dance his
failing breaths as they left his lips. i also
watched his sight fade to blackness when
i stuck the knife into his throat.

i told them it was self-defense, and they believed me. ]]>

]]> http://wily-flame.deviantart.com/art/Oda-do-seksu-98203109 http://wily-flame.deviantart.com/art/Oda-do-seksu-98203109 Wed, 17 Sep 2008 08:21:51 PDT Oda do seksu nonadult literature/poetry/humor/ballad Wily-Flame http://a.deviantart.net/avatars/w/i/wily-flame.png?6 Copyright 2008-2013 ~Wily-Flame
Ten wiersz jest efektem nudy na lekcjach xD ]]> robia loda za napiwki
daja dupy na parkiecie
za darmoche o tym wiecie

Seks, seks pornografia
seksualna dyskografia
niezle laski w szybkiej akci
dostarczaja wam atrakcji

Seks, seks wielkie biusty
przypadaja w kazde gusty
faluja, skacza, zakrêcaja
mozgi w papke zamieniaja

seks, seks przemoc w trakcie
brak wyczucia w kazdym akcie
ponizenie, zwrok szalony
wszelkich uczuc pozbawiony

Seks, seks zapelnienie
romantycznosc w zapomnienie
dziwki, dziwki nie dziewczyny
tego swiata to przyczyny ]]>
Ten wiersz jest efektem nudy na lekcjach xD ]]> http://myp55.deviantart.com/art/Giraffes-Are-Very-Tall-84116489 http://myp55.deviantart.com/art/Giraffes-Are-Very-Tall-84116489 Sun, 27 Apr 2008 19:46:31 PDT Giraffes Are Very Tall nonadult literature/poetry/humor/ballad myp55 http://a.deviantart.net/avatars/m/y/myp55.jpg Copyright 2008-2013 ~myp55
So, another one of those random try-and-get-to-sleep-but-mind-is-full-of-thoughts poems... I might try and illustrate this one at some point, it came from an idea for an image... ]]> Elephants are round,
Sheep can fly high, up in the sky,
For they are made of cloud.

The bumble bee, swims in the sea,
When it’s on holiday,
While jelly-fish prefer to wish,
Of a ride upon a sleigh.

The pangolin is very thin,
For it eats naught but dancing ants,
Rhinoceri like apple pie,
In preference to plants. ]]>
So, another one of those random try-and-get-to-sleep-but-mind-is-full-of-thoughts poems... I might try and illustrate this one at some point, it came from an idea for an image... ]]> http://me-duhhh.deviantart.com/art/The-Poop-That-Wasn-t-82290328 http://me-duhhh.deviantart.com/art/The-Poop-That-Wasn-t-82290328 Tue, 08 Apr 2008 17:53:09 PDT The Poop That Wasn't nonadult literature/poetry/humor/ballad me-duhhh http://a.deviantart.net/avatars/m/e/me-duhhh.gif?1 Copyright 2008-2013 ~me-duhhh ]]> A rather large turd; unflushable, no doubt.
The hours I spent upon the throne agrunting
It felt like a football that I had been punting.

The squeezing and pushing and forcing did not
leave this crap in the toilet; a clump of bird shot.
The moon and the stars and the planets align
Oh help me God, it still isn't time!

Perched on the seat I whistle away-
I've actually been here for most of the day-
What did I eat to cause me such blockage?
I hope to Dear Lord it wasn't the sausage!

There isn't much more about this to say,
When I ate that taco, I knew I would pay.
Walking across the b ]]>

]]> http://chibi-cthulhu.deviantart.com/art/Ode-to-Sideshow-Bob-27917353 http://chibi-cthulhu.deviantart.com/art/Ode-to-Sideshow-Bob-27917353 Thu, 19 Jan 2006 17:44:46 PST Ode to Sideshow Bob nonadult literature/poetry/humor/ballad chibi-cthulhu http://a.deviantart.net/avatars/c/h/chibi-cthulhu.jpg Copyright 2006-2013 ~chibi-cthulhu You have;

Your red, pointy hair
Is mad,
But neat.

Framing Krusty, Attempting murder,
Rigging an election for mayor;

Stealing a nuclear bomb,
Moving to Italy
'Cause life's just not fair.

I must say:
You're hear to stay:
A vendetta you did swear

On the family Simpson
For Lisa's malapropism
And Homer and Bart were there.

Your opera-singing
T.V. hate-slinging
Wedding-bell-ringing
To Ms. Selma Bouvier

Landed you jail;
Your skin grew pale
So low you decided to lay.

The Great Louse Detective, you were
To save the life of one, Homer
From the son the of Frank "Grimey" Grimes

Those were wonderful times.. ]]> http://walkingfish.deviantart.com/art/End-to-Anime-87605513 http://walkingfish.deviantart.com/art/End-to-Anime-87605513 Tue, 03 Jun 2008 16:08:26 PDT End to Anime nonadult literature/poetry/humor/ballad walkingfish http://a.deviantart.net/avatars/w/a/walkingfish.jpg Copyright 2008-2013 ~walkingfish I love this poem.

Don't be offended, anime lovers. I too, enjoy a good chibi now and then. But men: don't be surprised when you can't find your dream sexy-assassin-superpowered-bigbusted girl in the real world.

Enjoy ]]> and mouths so small they can't eat anything
This is the breed you've all come to know
in shows like Sailor Moon or the famous Death Note.

I can't help but wonder how they do survive
(beside the fact they're constantly about to die)
because I've noticed something, oh so small--
it's their hands, and they're far too...small (though the people are quite tall).

And don't forget
about the best of the best!
All the girls have very large breasts!
(even bigger than my history teacher's tests!!!!!!)

Now I can see
why so many guys
love these chicks
but their dreams are a lie.

No wonder most guys
are s ]]> I love this poem.

Don't be offended, anime lovers. I too, enjoy a good chibi now and then. But men: don't be surprised when you can't find your dream sexy-assassin-superpowered-bigbusted girl in the real world.

Enjoy ]]> http://ckye1234.deviantart.com/art/Kaulitz-Bells-71154903 http://ckye1234.deviantart.com/art/Kaulitz-Bells-71154903 Sat, 01 Dec 2007 21:29:46 PST Kaulitz Bells adult literature/poetry/humor/ballad ckye1234 http://a.deviantart.net/avatars/c/k/ckye1234.jpg Copyright 2007-2013 ~ckye1234 http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/
Dashing as they are
We are the only one's for them
over the crowds we go
laughing all the way
Punching little French girls
Getting to them now
What fun it is to laugh and sing
with tom and bill tonight

Oh, Tommy's bells, Billy's Bells
Jingle all the way
Oh, what fun it is to ride ...
hum hum hum hum hum
Tommy's bells, Billy's bells
Do them all the way
Oh, what fun it is to ride ...
hum hum hum hum hum

A day or 2 ago
We thought we'd take a ride
on Tommy's bells and Billy's bells
Always sexy by our sides
They were lean and lank
Misfortune seemed their lots
We got into a blackened cab
And then we got on t ]]> http://albel-is-mine.deviantart.com/art/GO-by-FLOW-parody-ver-66657183 http://albel-is-mine.deviantart.com/art/GO-by-FLOW-parody-ver-66657183 Sat, 06 Oct 2007 12:40:46 PDT GO by FLOW-parody ver. nonadult literature/poetry/humor/ballad Albel-is-MINE http://a.deviantart.net/avatars/a/l/albel-is-mine.gif?7 Copyright 2007-2013 =Albel-is-MINE
allll done by me....in about...oh...10 min

done for my dad.

original lyrics are copyright to flow and whoever their label is.

most of the words are antonyms for the english translation... ]]> Passive realists, always caring about what we wear
Passive realists, because we always doubt
Ori ori ori ohhhh....go the opposite way!

Not here, not now (Dud!)
Not coming out of the BARREL
Not here not now (douse!)
Procrastinate it, dim the fire!
Not here, not now (Dud!)
Not coming out of the BARREL
Not here not now (douse!)

At the end of a happy passive road, we tone down man's map: we know where to go.
The metal eating crow receives everything and doesn't leave.
Now, the eye of the mind only closes to wonder about the past (NO way!)
Everything is found, so let's stay whe ]]>
allll done by me....in about...oh...10 min

done for my dad.

original lyrics are copyright to flow and whoever their label is.

most of the words are antonyms for the english translation... ]]> http://boredbutbrilliant.deviantart.com/art/BAND-CAMP-66288420 http://boredbutbrilliant.deviantart.com/art/BAND-CAMP-66288420 Mon, 01 Oct 2007 19:00:17 PDT BAND CAMP nonadult literature/poetry/humor/ballad boredbutbrilliant http://a.deviantart.net/avatars/b/o/boredbutbrilliant.png Copyright 2007-2013 ~boredbutbrilliant
tell me what you think! ]]> dragging me out of sleep
I get up, groggy and tired
and shut out it's horrid beep
I dress in the dark
not looking forward to the day
for this is the first of band camp
it's all work and no play
the drive to school is silent
as I rub my eyes and moan
my dad smiles and cracks a joke
so bad it makes me groan
we get there and I get out
leaving all comforts at home
I smile when I see my friends
eyes tired as my own
4 hours of basics
make my unworked muscles weep
and 3 hours of coordinates
makes me want to go to sleep
lunch time, thankfully
my stomach makes a growl
we sit in semi circles
"ba ]]>
tell me what you think! ]]> http://rose-mcsugar.deviantart.com/art/Nasties-64984661 http://rose-mcsugar.deviantart.com/art/Nasties-64984661 Sat, 15 Sep 2007 15:42:10 PDT Nasties nonadult literature/poetry/humor/ballad Rose-McSugar http://a.deviantart.net/avatars/r/o/rose-mcsugar.png?9 Copyright 2007-2013 *Rose-McSugar I came up with. Keep in mind, I was reading Lenore comics with Opal all morning, so it's a little spooky. I likey spooky. :3

Nasties (c) Me ]]> Live under my bed
Ugly, horrid, spooky things
Just waiting to be fed

Each night, I'd pull the covers up
And wait until the dawn
Hoping against hope that then
The Nasties would be gone

Nasties, Nasties, little Nasties
Hungry for my flesh
I had to get them out of here
While my courage was still fresh

And so, one night, I got fed up
Of hiding like a mouse
I decided that, right then and there
"No more Nasties in this house!"

I grabbed a bat and water gun
From the chest beside my bed
And tried to block the scary thoughts
From entering my head

Nasties, Nasties, little Nasties
Making my heart pound ]]> I came up with. Keep in mind, I was reading Lenore comics with Opal all morning, so it's a little spooky. I likey spooky. :3

Nasties (c) Me ]]> http://braveheart06.deviantart.com/art/Halloween-Fright-41491907 http://braveheart06.deviantart.com/art/Halloween-Fright-41491907 Mon, 16 Oct 2006 05:46:25 PDT Halloween Fright nonadult literature/poetry/humor/ballad braveheart06 http://a.deviantart.net/avatars/b/r/braveheart06.jpg Copyright 2006-2013 ~braveheart06 One Halloween night
Just to be outside
Gave quite a fright
I thought I was safe
Locked in my room
But it turned into
A place of gloom
Suddenly things got so dark
I could not see
I was frightened to think
What was about to be
It got deathly quiet
There in my room
It was almost like
I had been sealed in a tomb
Out of nowhere
A light did appear
To look at it
Brought me such fear
It started out small
But then it grew
Larger and larger
It came in to view
What it was
I wanted to know
But it just seemed
To grow and grow
I started to scream
And ran out of my room
To only find
It was just the moon
]]> http://kingbehemoth.deviantart.com/art/a-starcraft-poem-31327977 http://kingbehemoth.deviantart.com/art/a-starcraft-poem-31327977 Tue, 04 Apr 2006 05:07:26 PDT a starcraft poem nonadult literature/poetry/humor/ballad kingbehemoth http://a.deviantart.net/avatars/k/i/kingbehemoth.gif Copyright 2006-2013 ~kingbehemoth ]]> a single Marine
Nothing was heard
nothing was seen
He looked, all around
He picked, in his nose
He felt safe, he felt sound
Then the arbiter arose… ]]> ]]> http://sakura-of-zaibach.deviantart.com/art/The-Hande-of-Friendshyppe-23944560 http://sakura-of-zaibach.deviantart.com/art/The-Hande-of-Friendshyppe-23944560 Wed, 12 Oct 2005 05:36:14 PDT The Hande of Friendshyppe nonadult literature/poetry/humor/ballad Sakura-of-Zaibach http://a.deviantart.net/avatars/s/a/sakura-of-zaibach.gif Copyright 2005-2013 ~Sakura-of-Zaibach

The story behind this:

Several of the guys in my British Literature class used a fake Halloween severed hand as a visual aid in their Elizabethan period presentations. My sister and I woke up the next morning to find it sitting outside our door. (Probably just to be funny, since we had already seen the hand and been playing with it earlier, so they knew it didn't freak us out.)

Instead of just giving it back, we wrote this poem to attach to the hand and leave it outside of somebody else's door. If all goes well, it'll get passed around the dorm.

-EDIT- Thumbnail has been updated. Now it's got the Hande with the poem as we printed it out, though we rolled it up like a scroll after the picture. ]]> Than he who giveth severred hande

Not foot nor head nor thumb alone,
But finngers, palm, and jutting bone

Men use all things to showe their hearts
For thee, it's human body parts

Now art thou false or art thou true?
The Hande hath been gyfted to you.

Let not the Hande of Friendshyppe rotte,
Leave it for what friends you've gotte. ]]>

The story behind this:

Several of the guys in my British Literature class used a fake Halloween severed hand as a visual aid in their Elizabethan period presentations. My sister and I woke up the next morning to find it sitting outside our door. (Probably just to be funny, since we had already seen the hand and been playing with it earlier, so they knew it didn't freak us out.)

Instead of just giving it back, we wrote this poem to attach to the hand and leave it outside of somebody else's door. If all goes well, it'll get passed around the dorm.

-EDIT- Thumbnail has been updated. Now it's got the Hande with the poem as we printed it out, though we rolled it up like a scroll after the picture.

]]> http://markusmackenzie.deviantart.com/art/im-dreaming-of-nightmares-131171364 http://markusmackenzie.deviantart.com/art/im-dreaming-of-nightmares-131171364 Mon, 27 Jul 2009 22:57:56 PDT im dreaming of nightmares nonadult literature/poetry/humor/ballad MarkusMackenzie http://a.deviantart.net/avatars/m/a/markusmackenzie.png?3 Copyright 2009-2013 ~MarkusMackenzie im frightened again
i woke up in tears
and shout out of my bed

a horribble screech
and a sudden stop death
car crashes burning
and leaving me to rest

fans a blowing
my neck all hung up
death is a coming
to wrap me all up

i see the end
i see a stop
i predict future
will no suddenly stop

all civilizations
will fall to the ground
peices a flying
of burning red hell

im dreaming of nightmears
im frightened again
i woke up in tears
and shout out of my bed ]]> http://raraspaz.deviantart.com/art/Eulogy-of-a-Beloved-Hamster-121421959 http://raraspaz.deviantart.com/art/Eulogy-of-a-Beloved-Hamster-121421959 Mon, 04 May 2009 08:24:25 PDT Eulogy of a Beloved Hamster nonadult literature/poetry/humor/ballad RaraSpaz http://a.deviantart.net/avatars/default.gif Copyright 2009-2013 ~RaraSpaz Still sits in your cage, waiting for use.
Your woodchips lie still, but my mind's in a haze.
You used to get up when you felt the sun's rays.
I blow in your face, just to see if you'll stir,
But you don't even twitch; all that moves is your fur.
I open your cage and reach my hand in,
But everything's stiff, from your toes to your chin.
"I fed you!" I cry, all my body a-shake.
"You sleep through the night.  Why aren't you awake?"
I look at you, Hammi, your mouth in a grin.
I wish I had found you before rigor mortis set in.
My father now finds me alone by your cage.
He says, "Please don't ]]> http://monsuerlaclauddebut.deviantart.com/art/The-Band-103200573 http://monsuerlaclauddebut.deviantart.com/art/The-Band-103200573 Mon, 10 Nov 2008 08:25:40 PST The Band nonadult literature/poetry/humor/ballad monsuerlaclauddebut http://a.deviantart.net/avatars/m/o/monsuerlaclauddebut.jpg?5 Copyright 2008-2013 ~monsuerlaclauddebut but a performance of disgust.
By a band lacking tempo,
tone, and conductor’s trust.

The music would be choppy,
the volume be insane.
Its purpose to be soft,    
but instead be played with vain. ]]> http://celtic-xena.deviantart.com/art/The-Day-I-Met-the-Devil-98246756 http://celtic-xena.deviantart.com/art/The-Day-I-Met-the-Devil-98246756 Wed, 17 Sep 2008 17:40:54 PDT The Day I Met the Devil nonadult literature/poetry/humor/ballad Celtic-Xena http://a.deviantart.net/avatars/c/e/celtic-xena.jpg?1 Copyright 2008-2013 ~Celtic-Xena And I must confess to being surprised by how handsome he looked to me.
Grinning at me, he looked so confident and bold.
‘I can give you anything you desire; all I need is your soul.’

I laughed hysterically, ‘Oh, please, that’s so cliché.’
‘Do you doubt my power? I’ll give you what you desire,’
That wily old Devil said to me.
‘I promise, I’m not a liar.’

‘Then, give me popularity, riches, and true love!’
I said, smiling hugely, ‘Can you do that, Devil?’
‘I can give you that and more! I can give ]]> http://nr137.deviantart.com/art/SS-Brubenheimer-91432056 http://nr137.deviantart.com/art/SS-Brubenheimer-91432056 Sat, 12 Jul 2008 00:52:12 PDT SS Brubenheimer nonadult literature/poetry/humor/ballad nr137 http://a.deviantart.net/avatars/n/r/nr137.jpg?5 Copyright 2008-2013 ~nr137 Din aur rupţi, crescuţi de mici pe punţi,
Când tu mi-ai spus că nu-ţi mai plac
Şi mi-ai trosnit un pumn în cap, la dracu!
În prima zi purtam basma şi suspinam
În timp ce vasul pornea spre ocean
Urma o viaţă de nerod neras
Şi-adus de spate, în impas, plângeam
A doua zi, după scripturi
S-au dat ai dracu duri de tot
Pe ţevile de cupru brun,
Vreo trei pitici rebeli, cu Barbă Cot
Şi mateloţi fără chiloţi, şi Noapte Bun
Şi SS Brubenheim era
Prin vi ]]> http://tobilover908.deviantart.com/art/Tobi-is-a-good-boy-88318024 http://tobilover908.deviantart.com/art/Tobi-is-a-good-boy-88318024 Tue, 10 Jun 2008 19:54:26 PDT Tobi is a good boy nonadult literature/poetry/humor/ballad Tobilover908 http://a.deviantart.net/avatars/t/o/tobilover908.gif?1 Copyright 2008-2013 ~Tobilover908
TOBI YOURE A GOOD GOY MAKE A BIG NOISE
PLAYIN IN THE STREET GONNA BE A BIG MAN SOMEDAY
YOU AINT GOT NO FACE YOU BIG DISCRASE
WEARN YOUR MASK ALL OVER THE PLACE

TOBI IS A GOOD BOY GOOD BOY
TOBI IS A GOOD BOY GOOD BOY

TOBI YOURE A OLD BOY HARD BOY
SHOUTIN IN THE LAIR GONNA TAKE ON SASUKE SOMEDAY (and win)
YOU HAVE CLAY ON YOUR FACE YOU BIG DICRASE
WAVIN YOUR SCARF ALL OVER THE PLACE

TOBI IS A GOOD BOY GOOD BOY
TOBI IS A GOOD BOY GOOD BOY

TOBI YOURE A OLD BOY POOR BOY
PLEADING WITH YOUR EYE GONNA MAKE CAKE SOMEDEI
YOU GOT A MASK ON YOU FACE YOU BIG DISCRASE
SEMPAIS GONNA BLOW YOU UP ALL OVER ]]> http://luckytaur3an27.deviantart.com/art/Stupid-Writer-s-Block-87318179 http://luckytaur3an27.deviantart.com/art/Stupid-Writer-s-Block-87318179 Sat, 31 May 2008 20:21:36 PDT :.-Stupid Writer's Block-.: nonadult literature/poetry/humor/ballad LuckyTaur3an27 http://a.deviantart.net/avatars/l/u/luckytaur3an27.gif?1 Copyright 2008-2013 ~LuckyTaur3an27 http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-nd/3.0/ ]]> can't think of anything at the moment.
Curse you writer's block,
I'll prob get a crappy comment.

Damn you writer's block,
can't think of what to write now...
Curse you writer's block,
but I'll think of something, some how...

Sitting here with my laptop,
trying to think of somethin' to write.
Curse you stupid writer's block!
But no worries, I'll win this fight!

Still can't think of anything,
but I will not surrender!!!!
Damn you writer's block!!!!
and I won't forfeit either!

Hey what do ya know?!
I did write something somehow!!!!
So ha stupid writer's block,
you can't do anything to me now!!!! ]]> ]]> http://enkelikitten.deviantart.com/art/O-Shock-a-Macavity-poem-74550175 http://enkelikitten.deviantart.com/art/O-Shock-a-Macavity-poem-74550175 Sun, 13 Jan 2008 12:14:21 PST O Shock - a Macavity poem nonadult literature/poetry/humor/ballad enkelikitten http://a.deviantart.net/avatars/e/n/enkelikitten.jpg Copyright 2008-2013 ~enkelikitten , inspired by a screenshot I accidentally took where Macavity looked exactly like he was trying to catch popcorn in his mouth. The style is a bit Dr Seuss-ish!! We hope you enjoy it ^_^ ]]> The cry rattled round Macavity’s lair
“The popcorn has gone! Oh, how can this be?
I didn’t catch one. What a huge tragedy!”

Macavity stared down at his shaking paws
Popcorn impaled on each of his claws.
He’d been trying for hours. In fact, all day long
But his paws, they were weak, and his aim always wrong

Catching popcorn in mouths is a hard thing to do
It takes quite a talent, (we know this is true.)
A talent Macavity unfortunately lacks
We’re sorry to say, he does not have the knacks.

He paced round the room, his fur all in knots
His eyes wid ]]> , inspired by a screenshot I accidentally took where Macavity looked exactly like he was trying to catch popcorn in his mouth. The style is a bit Dr Seuss-ish!! We hope you enjoy it ^_^ ]]> http://dragon-kazooie.deviantart.com/art/Vision-57097953 http://dragon-kazooie.deviantart.com/art/Vision-57097953 Thu, 07 Jun 2007 23:16:45 PDT Vision nonadult literature/poetry/humor/ballad dragon-kazooie http://a.deviantart.net/avatars/d/r/dragon-kazooie.jpg Copyright 2007-2013 ~dragon-kazooie
The crowded yard fell silent
All stilled their wings and beaks
They waited in anticipation;
Their leader was about to speak.
He strutted proudly to the front,
His followers made way.
No feather rustled nor cluck was heard,
As all wondered what he would say.
“I have a vision!”, he crowed aloud,
“For those who heed my call.
A time of liberty and freedom
For roosters, hens, for all.
And in this world I see before me,
That for which we are destined,
We can cross what roads we want
Without our motives being questioned!” ]]> http://creativecatie.deviantart.com/art/quot-What-If-quot-55546381 http://creativecatie.deviantart.com/art/quot-What-If-quot-55546381 Thu, 17 May 2007 17:26:04 PDT "What If" nonadult literature/poetry/humor/ballad creativecatie http://a.deviantart.net/avatars/c/r/creativecatie.png?1 Copyright 2007-2013 ~creativecatie Didn't sing about that ship?
Or the 49ers
Never took that trip?

What if Jim Carrey
Wasn't all that funny?
Or honey bees
Didn't make honey?

What if Oprah Winfrey
Was afraid to talk?
Or Neil Armstrong
Was afraid to walk?

What if Amelia Earhart
Was afraid of heights?
Or Benjamin Franklin
Never flew kites? ]]> http://vox21.deviantart.com/art/Unrequited-36673517 http://vox21.deviantart.com/art/Unrequited-36673517 Fri, 21 Jul 2006 12:19:27 PDT Unrequited nonadult literature/poetry/humor/ballad Vox21 http://a.deviantart.net/avatars/v/o/vox21.gif Copyright 2006-2013 ~Vox21 Flirting she dances close then far,
Hoping that he will notice her in the crowd;
But he stands immovable, uncaring.

More desperately now she moves closer,
Her movements more erratic and frantic.
She longs to reach his molten core,
To immolate herself within him.

At last she runs to him wild with desire.
Determined to consummate her passion.
Only to be tossed upon the floor,
A shell of herself, a charred remain.

Thus ends the ill fated tale of the bug and the bug zapper, now playing on patios everywhere this summer. ]]>