deviantART: by:-cheshire-cat-

deviantART: by:-cheshire-cat- http://search.deviantart.com/?q=by:-cheshire-cat-&section=today deviantART RSS for by:-cheshire-cat- en-us Copyright 2009, deviantART.com Mon, 21 Dec 2009 20:56:38 PST deviantART.com http://blogs.law.harvard.edu/tech/rss http://s.deviantart.com/minish/widgets/apple-touch-icon-precomposed.png Off to FA. http://-cheshire-cat-.deviantart.com/journal/11618115/ http://-cheshire-cat-.deviantart.com/journal/11618115/ Mon, 29 Jan 2007 23:59:40 PST
]]> ~-cheshire-cat- Dead-icated to you know who http://-cheshire-cat-.deviantart.com/journal/11042569/ http://-cheshire-cat-.deviantart.com/journal/11042569/ Tue, 12 Dec 2006 16:54:16 PST
In the period of the last few months that him and I were a couple I would cry every night and felt alone (that's not even goddamn close to how horrible I felt). He would push me away when I tried to cuddle... The relationship was dead. I stayed in it for lack of knowledge in what else to do. Upon this time I found comfort in someone else. It seemed that whenever the pain chose to comsume me he was there for me. Tears would be streaming hot down my cheeks and even when I had the comfort of two dear friends... It ke me home (it was cold, afterall) the real reason I wished to stay seemed to be that I liked his company. I couldn't really say anything about wanting to stay so I just waved and said it was nice meeting him.

This was July. Now in November Mikael and I (after a rather nasty fight) were invited to a friends party. After a period of no contact with Miika at all, him and another friend came to pick us up. Mikael, still angry from our fight wouldn't speak to me. I didn't know the other friend. And then, much to my surprise to be honest (I was shy, you know, and had been crying most of the night) this attractive man from the Perry festival spoke to me first. It felt good just to be asked how I was, something no one really took the time to ask me before.

We spoke for a while at the party, I drank his drink at the bar (And for that I apologize to you once more, darling, they passed me the glass and I was unaware) The next night, Mikael "broke up" with me and my heart hurt... Not because of the break up but because I wanted nothing more than to speak with Miika. I added him to my msn and I believe spoke to him almost every night for a while. While everyone else whom said things would be alright and gave me their support only brought sorrow, he seemed to be able to pull be out of the dark hole I buried myself in and make me laugh... Upon falling asleep one night after speaking with him, I noted quietly to myself. "Wow. Not one tear." The pain was finally going away...

After an attempt to speak with Mikael and tell him I wanted to talk as friends (which he so kindly did not answer, and chose to not speak to me for another three weeks... And still hasn't) a period of three weeks had gone by, herein Miika and I spoke until the wee hours of the night...

Present day, Miika and I have decided to become an official couple. After the most romantic move by him. "Dinner and a movie?" "Well.." "Do you like gourtmet?" "..Well, yes." "Okay, and wine? Perhaps some champagne and a movie afterwards?" Well. Stunned, and if anyone knows how stunned I was it's him... I accepted the offer.

Here comes the personal part, Miika-love.

I was terrified. Terrified to let myself enjoy your company from this point forward. Scared of having my heart stepped on again. Mikael ruined my belief in love... And I found it difficult to let myself accept the feelings I had for you. Perhaps I still am to an extent... But when I'm in your arms I feel like nothing could harm me. I've many times been laying with you just listening to the silence and wanted to say things along the lines of, "I might be falling in love with you." or even just "I love you." Because those three words are still beautiful, and I think part of me longs to hear them on your lips. Guess I'm still a little afraid, and for that I apologize to you. Just give me some more time on that.

Aside from the bad sides of things, I feel warm and happy when I'm with him, msn, phone, real life, it doesn't really matter. He's helped me already become stronger and proud to be who I am. It's all about confidence, baby. I could spend countless hours talking about the little things in life and still spend more. I think that if my belief for love will be restored, it will be by him. He's also an amazing kisser, I might add, and has beautiful eyes. Had to add it in, since I'm letting everything out.

I'm truly happy. I thank you for that.. From the depths of my heart. You're an amazing person who deserves nothing more than the very best in life and as long as you're with me I will do everything in my power to make sure you get at least close to that.

I can't do miracles, sadly, so close to the best will have to suffice.

Saying I love you would be the perfect way to bring this to a close, huh?

Text isn't nearly good enough for that though, so.

I think I'll end it by just saying... ~-cheshire-cat- Honestly, this is the truth. http://-cheshire-cat-.deviantart.com/journal/10914012/ http://-cheshire-cat-.deviantart.com/journal/10914012/ Fri, 01 Dec 2006 14:04:15 PST
]]> ~-cheshire-cat- Anyone want 2 million sP? http://-cheshire-cat-.deviantart.com/journal/10812138/ http://-cheshire-cat-.deviantart.com/journal/10812138/ Wed, 22 Nov 2006 14:02:59 PST At least now he can be happy.. That's what love is about.
Taking care of something you think is priceless

... Anyways. I'm feeling pretty low and horrible. But there's a fun contest on Subeta hosted by me. The top prize is a Dark Matter Potion worth 2 mil sP and a minion worth 200k or less. You can see the potion in my trades, so you know I have it.

All of you lovely Subetians should go join here [link] and give it your best shot... It's not that difficult of a character, to be honest.

Some art would also help cheer me up and keep me chugging along... Every day gets greyer.

I love you all. <3 Now go join at [link] and then join my contest (link above) and be rich only moments after joining.

]]> ~-cheshire-cat- ... http://-cheshire-cat-.deviantart.com/journal/10708791/ http://-cheshire-cat-.deviantart.com/journal/10708791/ Mon, 13 Nov 2006 06:30:50 PST
Male: "I didn't think you'd get over us that quickly."

...

Female: "Maybe it's my way of dealing with the pain."

Duh, nuh uh. I'm twitterpatted.

]]> ~-cheshire-cat- So... Am I? http://-cheshire-cat-.deviantart.com/journal/10335630/ http://-cheshire-cat-.deviantart.com/journal/10335630/ Mon, 09 Oct 2006 11:07:14 PDT
But am I really a bad person?

]]> ~-cheshire-cat- Doog night? http://-cheshire-cat-.deviantart.com/journal/10243129/ http://-cheshire-cat-.deviantart.com/journal/10243129/ Sun, 01 Oct 2006 02:17:00 PDT (0:03) ~Pam~: Forgot to tell you...wine is deadly...
(0:03) ~Pam~: You are going to have a HUGE head in the morning
(0:03) ~Pam~: Ohhh...sorry
(0:03) Megs: Mom
(0:03) Megs: I'm fucingloaded
(0:05) ~Pam~: Lol
(0:05) Megs: mo
(0:05) Megs: srsly
(0:05) Megs: I feel sick
(0:05) Megs: Ic
(0:05) Megs: I can't type
(0:05) ~Pam~: You are going to be in such pain....
(0:06) Megs: I know''
(0:06) Megs: I am do fuckingd durnk
(0:06) Megs: Bed
(0:06) ~Pam~: Good night dear
(0:06) Megs: I think before I fet sick
(0:06) ~Pam~: Lol
(0:07) Megs: N4eed to go tsqy doog night to them
(0:07) Megs: It's JKuhai'
(0:07) Megs: I lveyou..
(0:07) Megs: fdhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
(0:07) Megs: Lobcve you
(0:07) ~Pam~: I love you
(0:07) Megs: tqlalk to you
(0:07) ~Pam~: Go to bed sweetie
(0:07) ~Pam~: Night
(0:08) Megs: tomorrow
(0:08) Megs: w
(0:08) ~Pam~: You are going to hurt tomorrow
(0:08) Megs: ahyagä
(0:08) Megs: I can'tmakeesne '
(0:08) Megs: ah fuck
(0:08) Megs: doognigh't

Remind me again why getting drunk is fun?

Nah, to be honest I had an awesome time. Until I got sick... But I was so drunk I don't even remember how bad that was. Except when I woke up... Anyways. I just needed to share this conversation between me and my mom because it's so damn funny. Admit it.

At least I think I can say I'm getting used to Finnish culture. x)

Anyways. Now that I got that over with and probably made you at least smile a bit, or call me a loser, I'd like to accounce that...

You all must draw fanart for me. *puts foot down* I need fanart of my fursona, and if you love me. *sniffles* You'll draw fanart. I never even got any for my birthday. And, and. I'm Tribby! Everyone loves Tribby, right? So please, <3 Draw meee! Drunk, if you want.

]]> ~-cheshire-cat- I've decided... http://-cheshire-cat-.deviantart.com/journal/10157925/ http://-cheshire-cat-.deviantart.com/journal/10157925/ Sat, 23 Sep 2006 01:36:13 PDT
Really hope the character isn't too hard. =/ But I don't think I'll have to worry about it for a while.

]]> ~-cheshire-cat- Looking to buy http://-cheshire-cat-.deviantart.com/journal/10133049/ http://-cheshire-cat-.deviantart.com/journal/10133049/ Wed, 20 Sep 2006 14:06:57 PDT ~-cheshire-cat- Wanna be famous? http://-cheshire-cat-.deviantart.com/journal/9985046/ http://-cheshire-cat-.deviantart.com/journal/9985046/ Wed, 06 Sep 2006 05:36:32 PDT
Seriously. I've never seen Steve Irwin get so much attention. It's too bad life works that way. ]]> ~-cheshire-cat- Read if you've got a heart. http://-cheshire-cat-.deviantart.com/journal/9715164/ http://-cheshire-cat-.deviantart.com/journal/9715164/ Sun, 13 Aug 2006 16:00:42 PDT
All I ask is that if you're a cat lover, please think of Raum and have him in your heart... I'll know more tomorrow or Monday about what's wrong. But please... Send all of the good vibes that you can. This cat means the world to me. Without him to come home to, I'll be lost...

This song is dedicated to you Raum... Hang on. I'm with you.

You got to leave me now, you got to go alone
You got to chase a dream, one that's all your own
Before it slips away
When you're flyin' high, take my heart along
I'll be the harmony to every lonely song
That you learn to play

When you're soarin' through the air
I'll be your solid ground
Take every chance you dare
I'll still be there
When you come back down
When you come back down

I'll keep lookin' up, awaitin' your return
My greatest fear will be that you will crash and burn
And I won't feel your fire
I'll be the other hand that always holds the line
Connectin' in between your sweet heart and mine
I'm strung out on that wire

And I'll be on the other end, To hear you when you call
Angel, you were born to fly, If you get too high
I'll catch you when you fall
I'll catch you when you fall

Your memory's the sunshine every new day brings
I know the sky is calling
Angel, let me help you with your wings

When you're soarin' through the air
I'll be your solid ground
Take every chance you dare

I'll still be there
When you come back down
Take every chance you dare,
I'll still be there
When you come back down
When you come back down

Nickel Creek, When you Come Back Down. ]]> ~-cheshire-cat- Back. http://-cheshire-cat-.deviantart.com/journal/9638251/ http://-cheshire-cat-.deviantart.com/journal/9638251/ Tue, 08 Aug 2006 02:46:47 PDT
Jeps. Moving back here. The other account was boring. ]]> ~-cheshire-cat- For anyone who loves me. http://-cheshire-cat-.deviantart.com/journal/8401998/ http://-cheshire-cat-.deviantart.com/journal/8401998/ Fri, 07 Apr 2006 20:26:21 PDT
[link] I moved.

Rewatch, we fav, whatever. I will rarely be checking back into -cheshire-cat-. This is a now dead Devart account. I will, however, be keeping my old art here.

Thank you, all. Sorry I haven't been the best lately. ]]> ~-cheshire-cat- o.o http://-cheshire-cat-.deviantart.com/journal/7792472/ http://-cheshire-cat-.deviantart.com/journal/7792472/ Fri, 03 Feb 2006 17:09:18 PST
Nah. I'm ok. Really. Just get me a goddamn ticket to Finland. I'm going crazy. Had a bad day.. Caused shit between.. agh. Blah. nevermind.

Just changing my journal because Rapytur demanded it. ]]> ~-cheshire-cat- WINNERS. Finally. http://-cheshire-cat-.deviantart.com/journal/6215761/ http://-cheshire-cat-.deviantart.com/journal/6215761/ Tue, 29 Nov 2005 19:29:37 PST CONTEST

Wow. Sorry it took me so damned long everyone. A combination of having too much school work, not having my subscription and lots of other not so great stuff made me keep putting it off. But finally, I will announce the winners to the contest... And thank you SO much for all waiting so patiently. Mikey and A couple others helped pick the winning pictures...

Here goes!

First place goes to.... *drumrollplz* ... A little bit of dramaaaa... *waits to add more effect...* OK! Necrophiliacs , by *feebleminded ! Congrats, you! I see you have a subscription already. Note me and we'll work something out.

Second place goes tooooo.... *another drum roll* ... ~la-zorra with Roadkill Cafe! 'Grats Zora, and thanks for entering!

Third place goes to *ubasty With Together Forever
Annnnd
Last, but definitely not least... The honorable mention... goes to... How Romantic by ~Wolf-of-the-Leaf I thank you!

And again. Thanks to everyone who entered. I hope you had a blast. Those who've won, mail me with detail on the prizes. n.n
Everyone who didn't win... Wonderful job. I really enjoyed your submissions. Keep an eye out for the next contest! this one'll be fun.
Prizes!

The good part. Prizes! Here's how it goes:

1st place will get a THREE month subscription to deviantart and a picture of their choice drawn by me. Coloured, as many characters as you'd like, etc.

2nd place will get two pictures of their choice, in color of one character.

3rd place will get 1 picture of their choice in color, of one character.

And an honorary mention will be give. One sketchy piece of work of their character. Not color.

Friends

This is only some of the friends that are good to me here on deviantart and also elsewhere, such as msn, Neopets, etc.. etc.. I've also posted the worship worthy people that I watch. They are in no partcular order at all.

~-cheshire-cat- I just wanna go home... http://-cheshire-cat-.deviantart.com/journal/6064489/ http://-cheshire-cat-.deviantart.com/journal/6064489/ Fri, 29 Jul 2005 05:19:03 PDT Around 6-6:30 Finnish time. Mikey sat at the airport with me and we held hands silently while I tried my hardest to fight back the stingy hot tears that threatened to spill over my cheeks...
I couldn't look at his face.
That beautful Finnish face of his. If I looked, then the tears would bubble up again. So we held hands, fingers weaved and we breathed quietly together. Both of us deep down hurting.
The tears spilled.
Down my cheeks, hot sticky tears. A constant tiny river of salty liquid. Over my cheeks, dripping off onto my clothes to leave tiny splotches. He tried to comfort me the best he could. Offering me smiles with those amazing lips of his. A sad but friendly look in his magnificent grey eyes...
We kissed.
Twice only... If I stayed any longer then I would have broken down into an ugly cry. Letting it all out with loud squeals. Crying and crying until I drowned myself in my own tears...

It was nice having you here...

I love you. I love you too...

Bye... Not good bye. I'll see you later.

I left...
And as I walked toward my plane, I glanced back. There he was. Standing behind the sheet of glass... Apart. Again. Seperated, unfairly. The look on his face then was something that can not be explained with mere words. A smile still on his lips. Crooked but there... And his eyes explained that smile. Sad eyes that could have teared up themselves at any point. And yet, he raised a hand and wiggled four fingers in a wave... And I did the same, turning my head quickly to hide the pain.
The plane.
I still hadn't stopped crying when I boarded the plane. Eyes puffy and red, face sticky with tears. I held a napkin in my fingers, frantically wiping the tears away. There was always another to replace it.
The Tears.
Still haven't stopped. I travelled many hours. And still. After arriving to this... Wretched place I used to call home, the tears continue to fall. It's the day after I left and still, I can't fight the tears away and still, they fall... I went to sleep crying, clutching his shirt against me... And when I woke up, I began to cry again.
Emptiness.
The bed is empty now... there is no Mikey laying beside me. There are no arms wrapped around my body and there are no soft hands stroking it... And the tears begin again.
I know
That within time I will have him beside me again. Just wait five months and he will hold me close and tight and the tears that fall will be because of happiness, not sorrow...
My home
Is where my love is. My home is in his arms. My home is in Vaasa... My home is Mikey... Please... Can't I just go back home? ]]> ~-cheshire-cat- My Birthday! =P http://-cheshire-cat-.deviantart.com/journal/6037873/ http://-cheshire-cat-.deviantart.com/journal/6037873/ Tue, 26 Jul 2005 09:08:45 PDT

Thanks to anyone interested! It would just make me the happiest girl alive! ]]> ~-cheshire-cat- Is it real? http://-cheshire-cat-.deviantart.com/journal/4347499/ http://-cheshire-cat-.deviantart.com/journal/4347499/ Mon, 17 Jan 2005 22:13:20 PST

Internet relationships.

I find, are pretty much the same. At least, for me. Most friends seem to dither and get bored after the forth -month-. I've really only ever had one internet relationship, and it isn't over yet. It is the forth month now... And things seem to be teetering towards Hell... But i'm fighting. I think that if two people... No matter where they are from... Love each other enough they can survive love without touch. At least for a while. I don't expect anone to go on a relationship with no touch for all of their lives... But, at least for a fair amount of time. Especially with the promise of touch to come...

Pathetic? Me? Nuuuh. Love is real... It's real in many forms. This of which includes over the internet. If two people can meet... Not in person, but in heart, and in mind... and if they can connect. Then something beautiful can be accomplished. It can be held, and cherished, and... Treasured for so long. Ah. But it can be so hard... Especially for those of a younger age.

Is a relationship over the internet really worth it? Is... All of the agony and pain one goes through... Really worth going through? Of course it is, paws down... If one loves the other enough, then of course it is. After all, what are a few tears? The problem with 'Net repationships... The distance, the time, the trust. No wonder they're so damn difficult...

Aye. Look at me ramble. Sure felt good... ]]> ~-cheshire-cat- . http://-cheshire-cat-.deviantart.com/journal/4206235/ http://-cheshire-cat-.deviantart.com/journal/4206235/ Fri, 31 Dec 2004 20:39:58 PST
... I love you all, really. I do. ]]> ~-cheshire-cat- Leaving Furcadia, was nice knowing all of you. http://-cheshire-cat-.deviantart.com/journal/3886096/ http://-cheshire-cat-.deviantart.com/journal/3886096/ Sun, 21 Nov 2004 15:49:26 PST
Listening to: She Will Be Loved - Maroon 5
Watching: Stepford Wives

It's time to move on.

I need to leave Furcadia... It was nice for a while. Don't get me wrong, the people were kind and made me happy, but i've found deeper meaning elsewhere. Thus, I will be selling my assets. The following are what belong to me... They served me well while I had them, but are no longer needed and I would like to share the wealth, rather than let it rot away.

Just send me a note, post in this journal entry, or send an e-mail to helsinkiheart@hotmail.com if you are interested in any... You can offer a price or just give me what I ask...

3 year Dragon
Expires 2007-09-01/18:29:42/Sat
Transferable in 11 days. (I'll post when it is tranferable.)

1 year Bat Wings
Expires 2005-10-30/07:38:01/Sun
Fully Transferable

1 port space
Not used.
Transferable.

*takes a breath* That's it... Thanks to anyone who is interested. All funds will be immediately put away for an airline ticket to... My Heaven.

Good bye to all of my lovely Furcadian friends... Hope we can still keep in touch out of the Furre world. ]]> ~-cheshire-cat- Starry Nights http://-cheshire-cat-.deviantart.com/journal/3539731/ http://-cheshire-cat-.deviantart.com/journal/3539731/ Fri, 08 Oct 2004 04:15:23 PDT
Listening to: She Will Be Loved - Maroon 5
Watching: Shaun of The Dead

I have always loved the starsky, but lately the stars burn even brighter than ever before. I have learned that if you wish upon a falling star and truly want it with all of your heart... It can come true. And does.

My life before could be similar to that of a black hole... Dark, deep, mysterious... But no light. I just existed... On Earth there are millions of people, and in the Universe, millions of stars. How is it that one star... Can be meant for only one other star in all of the Heavens and some how these two stars manage to find each other... And together they burn brighter.

I have found my star. ]]> ~-cheshire-cat-