http://search.deviantart.com/?q=by:A-Scarlett-torn&section=today deviantART RSS for by:A-Scarlett-torn en-us Copyright 2009, deviantART.com Sat, 28 Nov 2009 02:39:16 PST deviantART.com http://blogs.law.harvard.edu/tech/rss http://s.deviantart.com/minish/widgets/apple-touch-icon-precomposed.png http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/27047905/ http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/27047905/ Sun, 06 Sep 2009 05:15:15 PDT
Haven't posted in a VERY LONG TIME!!!! But I will!!!

I've created a blog! [link]

Check it out and follow it! Please!

And if you have a twitter, get one and then follow me, because you love me, right?

RIGHT!?!?!?!

I can't believe I'm this hyper, this early! It doesn't make sense.

I had a TIRST, I will explain what that is on my BLOG which is why you have to read it!

]]> ~A-Scarlett-torn http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/26425053/ http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/26425053/ Thu, 06 Aug 2009 14:14:09 PDT I'm not. I love you guys but not that much. I happen to like my freedom.

]]> ~A-Scarlett-torn http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/26014637/ http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/26014637/ Fri, 17 Jul 2009 20:44:12 PDT Love you forever. Wo0t!


1.Your Name:
2. Age:
3. Single or Taken:
4. Favourite Film:
5. Favourite Song or Album:
6. Favourite Band/Artist:
7. Dirty or Clean:
8. Tattoos and/or Piercings:
9. Do we know each other outside of dA?
10. What's your philosophy on life?
11. Is the bottle half-full or half-empty?
12. Would you keep a secret from me if you thought it was in my best interest?
13. What is your favourite memory of us?
14. What is your favourite guilty pleasure?
15. Tell me one odd/interesting fact about you:
16. You can have three wishes (for yourself, so forget all the "world peace", etc.). What are they?
17. Can we get together and make a cake?
18. Which country is your spiritual home?
19. What is your big weakness?
20. Do you think I'm a good person?
21. What was your best/favourite subject at school?
22. Describe your accent:
23. If you could change anything about me, would you?
24. What do you wear to sleep?
25. Trousers or skirts?
26. Cigarettes or alcohol?
27. If I only had one day to live, what would we do together?
28. Will you re-post this so I can fill it out for you?

]]> ~A-Scarlett-torn http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/25890015/ http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/25890015/ Sat, 11 Jul 2009 23:22:26 PDT
]]> ~A-Scarlett-torn http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/25511201/ http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/25511201/ Wed, 24 Jun 2009 07:10:03 PDT
{1}.Post these rules

{2}.Each tagged person must post 8 things about themselves on their journal.

{3}.At the end you have to choose 8 people to tag, and post their icons on the same journal.

{4}.Go to their page and send a message saying you tagged them.

{5}.NO tag-backs.

Alright let's see.

1. I love PayDays because they're amazing
2. I hate driving
3. I recently made one of my friends a facebook.
4. I really love Tin Man the series, it's on scifi as we speak.
5. I love old things, movies, cameras, people. hehe
6. I love talking to cops; they are the most interesting people.
7. I read constantly, and one of my favorite books is Survivor by Chuck Palahniuk.
8. I love playing Phase 10. I'm really good at it.

I can't really tag anyone because all of my friends have been tagged already but I'll tag one person.

:~novae-res

p.s. I'll be leaving town tonight. You can contact me on my cell. And no I'm not going to post it. my friends should know it.

]]> ~A-Scarlett-torn http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/25048421/ http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/25048421/ Sun, 31 May 2009 10:12:24 PDT
]]> ~A-Scarlett-torn http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/24991988/ http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/24991988/ Thu, 28 May 2009 05:47:35 PDT
]]> ~A-Scarlett-torn http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/24864153/ http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/24864153/ Wed, 20 May 2009 20:22:43 PDT
]]> ~A-Scarlett-torn http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/24783460/ http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/24783460/ Sat, 16 May 2009 08:49:02 PDT
]]> ~A-Scarlett-torn http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/24366956/ http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/24366956/ Tue, 21 Apr 2009 19:24:27 PDT
It's been a while since I have updated you people on my life and I thought that it was about time. So here are a few things that have happened since.

I've fallen in love.
I didn't go to prom.
I played matchmaker and was quite good at it.
I'm in ITS. (I think...)
I acquired a taste for liquor and nicotine (kidding, it's a line from relientk's Deathbed)
I have had a epiphany.
And I now know what to do with my life.
I want to be a playboy bunny.
(Just kidding!)
I really don't want to be a playboy bunny, I don't really know what I want to be.
But for now I am content with the fact that happiness exists.

]]> ~A-Scarlett-torn http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/23929698/ http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/23929698/ Sat, 28 Mar 2009 07:42:49 PDT
P.S. Walmart doesn't sell Turkey Pastrami anymore. I'm kinda pissed off about that.

]]> ~A-Scarlett-torn http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/23803663/ http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/23803663/ Fri, 20 Mar 2009 20:12:00 PDT
I'll leave with you a thought, one of my own.
"I'm here, you're there, and the only thing stopping me is self-control."

]]> ~A-Scarlett-torn http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/23560369/ http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/23560369/ Fri, 06 Mar 2009 16:36:26 PST (x) Grease
(x) Pirates of the Caribbean
(x) Pirates of the Caribbean 2: Dead Man's Chest
( ) Boondock Saints
(x) Fight Club
(x) Starsky and Hutch
( ) Neverending Story
( ) Blazing Saddles
( ) Airplane
Total: 5

(x) The Princess Bride
(x) AnchorMan
(x) Napoleon Dynamite
( ) Labyrinth
( ) Saw
( ) Saw II
( ) White Noise
( ) White Oleander
(x) Anger Management
(x) 50 First Dates
(x)The Princess Diaries
(x) The Princess Diaries 2: Royal Engagement
Total so far: 12

(x) Scream
( ) Scream 2
( ) Scream 3
(x) Scary Movie
(x) Scary Movie 2
(x) Scary Movie 3
(x) Scary Movie 4
(x) American Pie
(x) American Pie 2
(x) American Wedding
(x) American Pie Band Camp
Total so far: 22

(x) Harry Potter 1
( ) Harry Potter 2
( ) Harry Potter 3
( ) Harry Potter 4
( ) Resident Evil 1
( ) Resident Evil 2
(x) The Wedding Singer
(x) Little Black Book
(x) The Village
(x) Lilo & Stitch
Total so far: 27

(x) Finding Nemo
(x) Finding Neverland
(x) Signs
(x) The Grinch
( ) Texas Chainsaw Massacre
( ) Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Beginning
(x) White Chicks
(x) Butterfly Effect
(x) 13 Going on 30
(x) I, Robot
(x) Robots
Total so far: 36

(x) Dodgeball: A True Underdog Story
( ) Universal Soldier
(x) Lemony Snicket: A Series Of Unfortunate Events
(x) Along Came Polly
(x) Deep Impact
( ) KingPin
(x) Never Been Kissed
(x) Meet The Parents
(x) Meet the Fockers
(x) Eight Crazy Nights
(x) Joe Dirt
( ) King Kong
Total so far: 45

(x) A Cinderella Story
( ) The Terminal
(x) The Lizzie McGuire Movie
(x) Passport to Paris
(x) Dumb & Dumber
(x) Dumber & Dumberer
( ) Final Destination
( ) Final Destination 2
(x) Final Destination 3
( ) Halloween
( ) The Ring
( ) The Ring 2
( ) Surviving X-MAS
(x) Flubber
Total so far: 52

(x) Harold & Kumar Go To White Castle
(x) Practical Magic
(x) Chicago
( ) Ghost Ship
( ) From Hell
( ) Hellboy
(x) Secret Window
(x) I Am Sam (I still wanna see this!)
(x) The Whole Nine Yards
(x) The Whole Ten Yards
Total so far: 59

(x) The Day After Tomorrow
(x) Child's Play
(x) Seed of Chucky
(x) Bride of Chucky
(x) Ten Things I Hate About You
(x) Just Married
(x) Gothika
( ) Nightmare on Elm Street
(x) Sixteen Candles
(x) Remember the Titans
(x) Coach Carter
(x) The Grudge
( ) The Grudge 2
(x) The Mask
(x) Son Of The Mask
Total so far: 73

(x) Bad Boys
( ) Bad Boys 2
( ) Joy Ride
(x) Lucky Number Sleven
(x) Ocean's Eleven
(x) Ocean's Twelve
(x) Bourne Identity
(x) Bourne Supremecy
( ) Lone Star
(x) Bedazzled
( ) Predator I
( ) Predator II
(x) The Fog
(x) Ice Age
(x) Ice Age 2: The Meltdown
( ) Curious George
Total so far: 83

(x) Independence Day
( ) Cujo (My god do I wanna see this movie, though)
( ) A Bronx Tale
( ) Darkness Falls
(x) Christine
(x) ET
( ) Children of the Corn
(x) My Bosses Daughter
(x) Maid in Manhattan
( ) War of the Worlds
(x) Rush Hour
(x) Rush Hour 2
Total so far: 90

( ) Best Bet
(x) How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days
(x) She's All That
(x) Calendar Girls
(x) Sideways
( ) Mars Attacks
( ) Event Horizon
(x) Ever After
(x) Wizard of Oz
(x) Forrest Gump
( ) Big Trouble in Little China
(x) The Terminator
(x) The Terminator 2
(x) The Terminator 3
Total so far: 99

(x) X-Men
(x) X2
(x) X-3
(x) Spider-Man
(x) Spider-Man 2
(x) Sky High
( ) Jeepers Creepers
( ) Jeepers Creepers 2
(x) Catch Me If You Can
(x) The Little Mermaid
(x) Freaky Friday
( ) Reign of Fire (=w= dargons~)
( ) The Skulls
(x) Cruel Intentions
(x) Cruel Intentions 2
(x) The Hot Chick (8D)
(x) Shrek
(x) Shrek 2
Total so far: 113

(x) Swimfan
(x) Miracle on 34th street
(x) Old School
(x) The Notebook (only in psychology XP)
( ) K-Pax
( ) Krippendorf's Tribe
(x) A Walk to Remember
( ) Ice Castle
( ) Boogeyman
(x) The 40-Year-Old-Virgin
Total so far: 119

(x) Lord of the Rings Fellowship of the Ring
( ) Lord of the Rings The Two Towers
( ) Lord of the Rings Return Of the King
(x) Indiana Jones and the Raiders of the Lost Ark
(x) Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom
(x) Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade ~A-Scarlett-torn http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/23405517/ http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/23405517/ Wed, 25 Feb 2009 18:58:05 PST Thou art more lovely and more temperate:
Rough winds do shake the darling buds of May,
And Summer's lease hath all too short a date:
Sometime too hot the eye of heaven shines,
And oft' is his gold complexion dimm'd;
And every fair from fair sometime declines,
By chance or nature's changing course untrimm'd:
But thy eternal Summer shall not fade
Nor lose possession of that fair thou owest;
Nor shall Death brag thou wanderest in his shade,
When in eternal lines to time thou growest:

So long as men can breathe, or eyes can see,
So long lives this, and this gives life to thee.

-Sonnet 18 - William Shakespeare

If you can believe it, while I was typing this, I was reciting it aloud.

I was thinking recently about the poetry of Shakespeare and of the Renaissance and have noticed that love poetry of this period, in fact love poetry from any era has one flaw. It is all about the courting process of the relationship, and often nothing more. But anyone who has been in a long lasting successful relationship (myself excluded) knows that they take work. But work isn't romantic, no one wants to read poetry on the fights, the utter familiarity or the bickering to clean up after one another. Too many times are people confused, because of this lack of representation in Hollywood and literature. So I say we fix it. Write about the things that are real, instead of the ideals of what should be. Realize that your life isn't a movie, there is no script, and no perfect happy ending. Know that, the right and now is up to you.

]]> ~A-Scarlett-torn http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/23210126/ http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/23210126/ Sun, 15 Feb 2009 06:11:55 PST
]]> ~A-Scarlett-torn http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/22910851/ http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/22910851/ Fri, 30 Jan 2009 18:59:56 PST
Yesterday was filled with excitement,
A war was fought, a battle was won,
And we came out the victors,
Or at least one of them when the time was done.
We cheered and danced and chanted our numbers.
5-5-7, 5-5-7, 5-5-7,
We went our separate ways, drifting off to sleep
For tomorrow, good morrow, we'd meet.
So we had our extravagant dreams last night,
Some of darkness, and some of light,
We awoke to a cold sweet morning,
Drove to that place of wonderment,
And engaged ourselves and sat quiet still,
For we were at the performer's will,
We laughed wildly, and chuckled under our breath,
Clapped at wrong times,
Cried at scenes of death.
Told jokes softly, and planned our escape.
For something had to be done,
And one must never be late.
So I bid them adieu, and said my farewells
Telling all who inquired, I would not return.
For I must follow the principles,
That I will not unlearn.
So now I sit awkwardly on couch,
Home, safe and sound
With no boulders on my heart.

[Fade to Black]

]]> ~A-Scarlett-torn http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/22680902/ http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/22680902/ Mon, 19 Jan 2009 19:03:17 PST
I now know why it didn't work out between what's-his-face and I. Apparently I was too clingy, which is ridiculous because I didn't even like him that much. But enough about that idiot.

A long weekend spent in the cold, outside, in a tent was nice. Gave me a much needed rest and made me think more about what it was that I wanted out of life.

Today is my best boy space friend's birthday..He's 18! Which does me no good at all.

I find that it is utterly soothing to be alone but I feel like I need a little noise in my life. I want to experience all that there is to, and I want to do it with someone who gets me. Which isn't going to happen because I'm in high school and the kind of love that exists only in fairy tales, doesn't exist in high school.

I want to give myself utterly and completely to someone who won't hurt me, someone who won't make me cry.

Anyway, I have a long week ahead of me. School tomorrow and smiles to fake.

]]> ~A-Scarlett-torn http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/22382614/ http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/22382614/ Sat, 03 Jan 2009 21:03:45 PST
As you may have noticed, I have uploaded stock images and you all know that I'm not really into doing that, but I have been thinking that I should contribute more to the community. So I came up with this. I submit stock every once in a while, when I'm busy with school work or just don't care. KIDDING. I always care. Anyway, I could update you with more personal things but my sudden realization is that people that I see everyday read this, and I know that this is a obvious thing to discover so late, but sometimes I get a little moronic, and well I actually have no excuse for that.

Everyone needs to have secrets.

]]> ~A-Scarlett-torn http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/22073335/ http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/22073335/ Fri, 19 Dec 2008 18:54:28 PST
Because of the lock down, I was stuck in my fourth period until the dismissal bell rang. That was a perfectly wasted day. I could have been sitting on my couch, eating cheerios and watching old episodes of the Sons of Anarchy, in my pyjamas. But no I was stuck in a classroom. It was mega fun. And that was sarcasm. It wasn't exactly painful, but playing hangman for five hours cannot be called entertainment, especially with the one person that everyone hates. Partially because he's a Republican, and in ROTC, and annoying. He likes me, apparently I am a tease. :shudders:

Really? Am I really a tease? As if things weren't bad enough. I got a twenty-one year old trying to buy me things, a grade ten-er trying to corner me in the halls, and a red-headed guitar player who refuses to call me. I am going to go insane. Oh maybe not. I'm stay here on DA for a while and forget all my troubles.

]]> ~A-Scarlett-torn http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/21835754/ http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/21835754/ Fri, 05 Dec 2008 17:39:31 PST
All in all, a great week, but I forgot to mention the fact that my ex-best friend's ex-boyfriend, who impregnated her, and who used to go out with me, before he boned my best friend, asked me out. Weird, huh? The weirder thing was that I wanted to say yes. After all, we were friends before all the drama happened, I figured that we could be friends afterwards. But I was sincerely mistaken. I can't stop thinking how it would look, me taking him back after everything that happened. It would make me look like I was less than, trying to compensate for the empty feeling inside, like I was indeed pathetic and everything that happened to Niki, my ex-best friend, would in turn happen to me. Though that is impossible because I am all about abstinence.

I was rejected yet again today, or rather yesterday and I didn't hear about it until today. He is rather ugly, but his personality is appealing or at least it was, until he started talking about my friend's band. I am all for rock, but metal and screamo cross the line. There are a few exceptions, but only a few. Another boy that I have yet to talk about is gorgeous and I believe he knows it but I don't think that he believes it. So I told him today, and his beautiful grey eyes stared into mine and they lit up. He smiled, and I smiled, and the whole class's attention was called in our direction when the teacher caught us, staring at each other. He is a music person, he said. A metal person, but there hasn't been one guy that I've liked that wasn't. He plays the guitar, and finds me intriguingly strange, but at least he isn't bored with me. Neither I him. Patrick, the Irish Catholic; it seems like he's staking me. I see him everywhere. On the way to my 2nd period, during lunch, 4th, before 5th and after 7th. Major creepy alert.

That was my hectic week, and don't even get me started on the Latin.

]]> ~A-Scarlett-torn http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/21719848/ http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/21719848/ Fri, 28 Nov 2008 21:07:33 PST
P.S. I'm drunk off of the sweet nectar of the night.

]]> ~A-Scarlett-torn http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/21662975/ http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/21662975/ Tue, 25 Nov 2008 12:07:04 PST
]]> ~A-Scarlett-torn http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/21480117/ http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/21480117/ Fri, 14 Nov 2008 05:20:53 PST
]]> ~A-Scarlett-torn http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/21342907/ http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/21342907/ Wed, 05 Nov 2008 15:23:11 PST
So anyway, I am in a bit of a pickle. I find that I'm angry at myself and angry at others for not understanding. I am a Seventh day Adventist, there I said, it doesn't seem so hard but it is. Having to explain constantly as to why I don't do this and I don't do that gets frustrating at times. Because the norm, especially at my school, is going to church on Sundays and I don't do that, I go on Saturdays. And I hate to say it but it interferes with what social life I have. I kind of wish that everyone could adjust to me, especially those who don't go at all and it's not like they would die if they didn't do something on a Saturday. And at running the risk of sounding harsh, I do want to say straight away that I love you all, perhaps in my own special way, but this is my time to vent, so shut up.

I don't think of my denomination as a handicap, but for instance there was a work call last Saturday and I didn't go, and I'm stage manager and not a lot of other people showed up. And I know that I'm ranting and raving but I'm sad and angry and frustrated. And now districts, the one thing that I really truly wanted, is on Saturday as well. What chance is there for me, if I am here and everyone else is over there. But I did this to myself. I wanted to go to a public school and I wanted to be different. I didn't want to go to the school that everyone from my old school was going to. And even with a few people from my old school there with me, they're not with me. I have no one with which I can find refuge because they know exactly what I'm going through. I have a support team, but that is only because I'm in Drama and have people there who love me for the crazy oreo that I am.

But we're not the same. And they have altogether different struggles, maybe equally as hard but I can't see that. And I can't see myself breaking the Sabbath to please them. They are my friends and under any other circumstances, I would do anything for them. Give them the shirt off my back, feed them when they're hungry, shelter them when they're cold. It's who I am. But I can't stop being who I am just to please them. And that is part of who I am.

]]> ~A-Scarlett-torn http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/21034619/ http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/21034619/ Fri, 17 Oct 2008 16:18:54 PDT
]]> ~A-Scarlett-torn http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/20692650/ http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/20692650/ Fri, 26 Sep 2008 18:39:33 PDT
]]> ~A-Scarlett-torn http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/20408251/ http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/20408251/ Tue, 09 Sep 2008 14:41:52 PDT Anyway, enough of that, I'm hoping that my vision either gets better or it improves enough that I can consider lasik.

Enough about my eyes, school has been fun, or not fun but not terrible. I'm going to audition for the Curious Savage and I read it and it is weird, but funny weird. I want to be Florence or something.

]]> ~A-Scarlett-torn http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/20295451/ http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/20295451/ Tue, 02 Sep 2008 17:42:23 PDT

Well now that that is out of the way. I will tell you about my day. Okay, I wake up late and barely catch my bus, running with breakable things in backpack, not a good idea, people.

Then the media centre is closed so I can't print out my assignment that I finished but couldn't print because my printer was acting up. So I run over to the computer room and wait for the computers to load because they don't boot them until 9:30. Then a boy comes in, his brown hair is wet and sticking to his face, his eyes are familiar and blue, I have seen him all around and I know that I knew him once but the name escapes me, so as I am printing out my assignment, he says hello.

I retrieve the greeting and throw it back. Finally I stumble upon the question, do I know you? He replies, "I remember you." Which makes me feel bad because I can't, for the life of me, remember this guy's name. So he starts to give me clues: people's names, places, t-shirts that he used to wear and finally, his name as if plucked from the heavens, finds my tongue, Austin.

I had a crush on him last year, and he had a Q-tie factor of 10 but hidden under a nerd costume. But I still saw potential, I was just too afraid to act on it, because well he was an undercover 10 and I was a real 3 maybe 4 on a good day, good enough for a glance but not a second look.

Anyway, that began my school day. First hour went well, Second, the teacher scared the living daylights out of me, and Third, the teacher did the same. Only he was ranting about hand turkeys. Don't Ask.

Then Lunch. I sit with a group of girls and honestly I don't know how I ended up sitting with them. Not that I don't enjoy their company, it's just that they are a bad influence on me. They are so girlie and frilly and not like me at all.

Fourth was uneventful. The assignment that I was rushing to print out in the morning was due that period,and he took it from us after delaying for a week and a half. I procrastinate.

Fifth was of no avail. This period is my sleep period; it allows me to dream up something else to write about or just dream of my teacher, which would be creepy in other period but this one, because he is smoking. Hot, people. Nicotine is just gross.

Sixth allowed my brain to rest because it's my only honours class, and I don't care much about it. So I do other work for my other classes or nap behind a book fort. I'll probably post a photograph later.

Seventh is always my favourite, not because it's the last but because we get to work with the sweetest kids I have ever met. They are in a program called Best Buddies, and it is for mental challenged individuals. But they are really cool and one of them, my partner gave me a hug today, she's so sweet.

But Anyway, that was my day. Any questions?

]]> ~A-Scarlett-torn http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/20244223/ http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/20244223/ Sat, 30 Aug 2008 22:27:00 PDT
]]> ~A-Scarlett-torn http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/20207719/ http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/20207719/ Thu, 28 Aug 2008 18:59:47 PDT On to the drama stuff, I am completely heart broken but I didn't tell you that because it's not true. Joe, that guy I was talking about it my post about the first day of school, hurt me. Like my feelings or whatever. I really didn't want to say anything about it because I have this reputation that I have to keep in tact and I can't let anyone see that he hurt me.
I cried the whole day after lunch. He just told me straight out that he didn't like me like that. Whatever. I guess it was my fault because I assumed that he liked me because of the way that he looked at me. The worst part was that, he told all his friends and when I came back for my stuff with one of my really close friends, they were all staring at me. I know sometimes when something embarrassing or stupid happens it feels like people are staring but they totally were. They weren't subtle.

]]> ~A-Scarlett-torn http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/20026858/ http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/20026858/ Mon, 18 Aug 2008 16:45:41 PDT
]]> ~A-Scarlett-torn http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/19872106/ http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/19872106/ Sun, 10 Aug 2008 01:32:51 PDT
I just need to know what you guys think, because maybe I just whined too much back then or something, but I don't know what it is, they just don't feel right, and I want your opinion before I delete them forever.

Just tell me, I am so desperate. And I didn't even want to admit that, so yeah.

Hugs and kisses,

K

P.S. I won't do that again, so if that kinda scared you, it's okay.

]]> ~A-Scarlett-torn http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/19836684/ http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/19836684/ Thu, 07 Aug 2008 23:02:07 PDT
My fear of life is taking over my life. I want to just let go but I know that so much is riding on this year. It's the single most important year to colleges. So I'm stressing because if I screw up, it's over. My hopes and dreams are dashed out the window and I might as well get pregnant and live with a man I don't love because I will be miserable.

I love school. I love learning. I love books, and the worst thing is that because of that romanticism of life that I read about, anything that is experienced is disappointing. I am sad. Not because I feel alone, but because I'm so used to the loneliness that I will be sad when it has to end.

But like everyone else, I am a hypocrite. I want someone to share life with. Just the little things like sweet innocent smiles and secrets that no one else knows. I want a boy. Someone to keep me dirty, humble and sweet. Nothing serious.

It seems like everyone is hooked up with someone. My best mate told me that he knows of a fellow who is head over heels in love with me, but is afraid of me. Now I didn't know I was scary. Someone should have told me.

So the high school experience isn't what I thought it would be, go figure.

]]> ~A-Scarlett-torn http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/19689785/ http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/19689785/ Wed, 30 Jul 2008 22:02:35 PDT
My father is seeing it fit to take back my camera, claiming that it's his and that he is upgrading, when he seemed content with an analog camera not even weeks before I got my Casio. So for right now that means no pictures. In my opinion, I think it very selfish of him to do that. My art is at stake and he finds it in his best interest to "upgrade", rather than to do what's right.

It's like talking to brick wall, that I want to punch every once in a while. What makes me feel even better is that I let my parents read everything. They both have the website to look at but they choose not to. Is it because they hate me? Because that I could handle. It's because they don't care and that is way worse.

It was my brother's birthday and my gift to him was a day to himself. None of my drama or my noise. I was as quiet as a mouse today, and it costed me nothing, except my sanity. But that would be easily restored by the return of my camera.

That doesn't seem like that is going to happen soon.

]]> ~A-Scarlett-torn http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/19651339/ http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/19651339/ Mon, 28 Jul 2008 22:28:09 PDT
I'll tell you.

A heartless person. I posted a deviation called Heartless and I said that it was just a chapter from my book but the truth is I'm Elia. I'm that mean vindictive little girl who can't get close to anyone because I'm afraid of the repercussions.

I told you all about a man and how he was my first kiss. I told you the love I thought that I had for him but I was wrong. I loved him because I knew what I could do to him and most of you will never know such power. But it came easily and it stayed because I held on to it, and I shouldn't have.

I keep complaining about the lack of someone in my life and It made no sense for me to be doing that. Because I was complaining about the lack of the guy in my life and lit up all my stars. The one who made me swoon, someone like Cary Grant or Jimmy Stewart.

Someone who could understand and accept my love for old things and love my old soul.

Is that really too much to say? To have someone to watch old pictures with and laugh at observational comedy.

]]> ~A-Scarlett-torn http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/19556511/ http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/19556511/ Wed, 23 Jul 2008 13:58:17 PDT
My best mate is a workaholic. I can't get out of this class that I'm stuck in. I have yet to finish any of the summer work. Don't get me wrong I started it all but I haven't the heart to finish it.

Incredibly lazy of me, isn't it?

]]> ~A-Scarlett-torn http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/19469525/ http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/19469525/ Fri, 18 Jul 2008 17:41:27 PDT
It was fun.

You guys are going to wait until Sunday for the uploads of the photographs. My memory card reader is messed up so I have to get another which my mother said we would get Saturday night but she'll probably forget or maybe I will.

Anyway, I had fun and I learned a lot. Leave it to me to find a place to vacation that is both educational and entertaining. But that's just how I roll.

So I made some friends on the plane. I switched with my mother because she didn't think that I could handle sitting next to two perfect strangers. So it was this dude and this lady and we talked for the entire flight which was actually hard because we were right near the engine.

Music, Movies, things like that.

Things are back to normal now. Dad's yelling at me for leaving my plate on the table, again. It wasn't even a plate.

So yeah.

]]> ~A-Scarlett-torn http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/19400056/ http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/19400056/ Mon, 14 Jul 2008 22:24:45 PDT Got my Casio Exilm back
Even though my father is withholding the case from me
Cut my hair short and layered it
Feels weird
I'll post pictures later
This is feeling a bit like MySpace
That's just the update.

I won't be posting for a while.

My mother forbids the laptop going on the journey with us.

Toni Morrison's Song of Solomon sucks. You can tell a book sucks if they don't tell you what it's about on the back.
They want you to look inside, at all the fake reviews and be impressed. But the book sucks.

Enough rambling.

Gotta sleep.
Early flight.

]]> ~A-Scarlett-torn http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/19334544/ http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/19334544/ Fri, 11 Jul 2008 12:43:14 PDT During The Academy Is's Attention Attention, I fainted.
And He [link]
carried me to the First Aid and nursed me back to health.
Then I went to see Jack's Mannequin's set.
Warped Tour was awesome.


Bands I Saw:

Valencia
T13c
The Academy Is..
Jack's Mannequin
Say Anything
Chasing Thrills
Relient K
Mayday Parade
The Higher
Every Time I Die
Josephine Collective
Pink Spider
Cobra Starship
The Bronx
Anberlin
Against Me!
We The Kings

And some other indie bands that I don't remember the names of.

]]> ~A-Scarlett-torn http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/19282625/ http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/19282625/ Tue, 08 Jul 2008 22:07:55 PDT
So I want to thank all of you that have read or looked at my work. I thank you for the comments and the favourites and the encouragements.

I just want to point you toward some of my older stuff. In my opinion, I don't know if they are any good, but some of you have wanted to see the growth over the past year and a half, so look back to '06 and '07.

I'm not ashamed of those years, but I think that I've done some serious growing and I think that you will enjoy it as much as I did when I was writing it.

I am seriously proud of myself. This month I have submitted 12 deviations and it's just the 9th. I'm hoping that it will be more writing than photography but when it comes, it comes. I don't try to control it.

I got CPR certified yesterday. Which is great. BUT now I have this responsibility. You know,"Those who have the ability, have the obligation." I don't remember who say it but it gave me the heebie-geebies.

In the meanwhile, I was hoping that I could get some suggestions as to what to write about next, anything. I don't know if I feel too well about prompts, but ideas would be nice. If not, then I have to stay up into all hours of the night, until inspiration hits me.

That's when it usually happens. I'll be in bed, dosing off when I start talking. It's a while before I realize that it's my own voice, but when I do, I try to recall what I just said and write it down. In the dark. Not very smart but when it knocks, you answer.

Anyway, I should try to get some shut-eye. I have to get my tickets for the Warped Tour tomorrow.

I love you all.(Or at least like some of you)

]]> ~A-Scarlett-torn http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/19245133/ http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/19245133/ Sun, 06 Jul 2008 23:38:36 PDT
So I realized that none of you knew what I looked like, apart from the people that go to my school. And then I realized that no one knows what I looked like in grade eight either, apart from the people who went to school with me, which by the way are now either "bitches", "sluts" or "thugs". Funny considering we went to one of those Christian Schools.

Anyway, apart from that, I have had total writer's block. Honestly I thought that the last few deviations were total shit, but you liked them and I appreciate that to the fullest in which it can be appreciated.

So Summer's half over. So I can celebrate that I have so much of an absence of a life that I'm actually looking forward to going back to school.

I watch a lot of television, mostly old films, but lately I have been watching stand up comedy and I found out that it's only funny if you're updated on current events. I was watching a special by a comedian called John Oliver last night and I was so lost that I thought it would be easier to understand if I had the captions. So I put them on and my mother thought I did it just to piss her off. It didn't help that the guy had a British accent; it just made me feel bad that someone who doesn't even live here knew more about the country than I did.

Listening to music is always fun but it's not fun if your nineteen year old brother is still singing the Backstreet Boys. I listen to alternative music, but I don't know what it actually is. What is it the alternative to? I've become so frustrated with asking myself that, that I just say screw it and all the things that don't quite fit into the other genres, I cram into the Alternative.

I was watching this 6'6" Jewish comedian talk about cookies for like twenty minutes before I realized it's been like eight months since I've had one. And I'm not even on a diet, I'm just to poor to buy them. That or my mother hates me.

My brother's friends are cool, what's even worse than that is that they're actually his friends. I am not even kidding you, they are great guys. I can't even understand why they are friends with him. That is how cool they are. I find that I like a different one every time they come over. And it's just by some strange coincidence, that I'm always scantly clad, laying around reading a book with my feet in the air. But I never mess with them. That would be wrong.

I made my bed this morning, or should I say afternoon because for some reason as school lets out, my body goes from lazy to super lazy, like overnight. So I made my bed and I was lying on it, when I thought to myself, this is a first.

Thank you everybody for reading my comedic rant that I attempted and probably failed at.

Good night.

]]> ~A-Scarlett-torn http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/19145015/ http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/19145015/ Tue, 01 Jul 2008 11:06:42 PDT I could tell you that nothing in the world could possibly make me attractive to the one person that I actually care about. I could tell you that I feel sorry for myself sometimes, and because of that fact, I'm sick of my own reflection. I could also tell you that I lie constantly and maybe nothing happened. That I stayed in my little world, and danced around to Metro Station, naked. But then maybe that's a lie too. Sometimes I can't even tell the difference. Is it a lie if you believe too?
I can't change my mood, so how about you tell me what it is?

]]> ~A-Scarlett-torn http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/19048578/ http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/19048578/ Wed, 25 Jun 2008 23:31:16 PDT Lately I disgust myself. With my lack, of what seems to be, a life, I fill it with stupidness. One guy liked me and started calling me and stuff and I told him to get a girlfriend, because it was starting to feel too much like the Collin situation. The good thing about this time around is that I don't have a best friend that he can knock up, unless there is something that Michael wants to tell me. Maybe I am a loser, but I can't imagine what my mother describes as the one and that scares me the shit outta me, because it's in my 10 year plan. It's on my list as well, between conquering my fear of driving and visiting the Louvre. I know that I haven't been exactly talking about this stuff for a while, but these things bug me especially when everything around me reminds me of how alone I am.
Today, or rather yesterday, I was trimming my roses and I noticed that two different colored roses were faced toward each other in almost a shape of a heart. Which brings me to another confession, I like Romantic Comedies. I know that the plot outline is always the same but it's the fantasy that always intrigued me, how someone could be so fuckin' dumb as to believe that it actually exists. I was born a skeptic. It's not something that you can easily grow out of. Maybe that's what's holding me back.
That and love. Love itself seems crazy. Crimes of passion are committed because that love that courses through their veins is what keeps them alive. Love of money, love of possession. I watch the shows and see the person laying on the ground and see myself. One wrong move and that's where lots of people end up. I mean, how can you let everything go, knowing that maybe it's not right? They keep saying that if you don't date, then you'll never know, but what if they are wrong? What if you had waited, the right one would have come along and carried you away on his white horse and you wouldn't be laying there with people trying to figure out who you were?
Possibilities. It was a lot easier back when there was one way to success, instead of thousands of ways to fail. And that is what scares everybody, right? Failure.

]]> ~A-Scarlett-torn http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/18957422/ http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/18957422/ Fri, 20 Jun 2008 21:04:23 PDT
This frustrates me immensely. I am completely useless if I can't write. I have been reading the required summer reading assignments for my AP classes next school year. I have been doing online classes. It's almost like I have not stopped going to school. But unlike this TORTURE, I had things to write about and was able to. This is not an ordinary case of writer's block, maybe I just don't care anymore.

I've stop trying. I go to open a document and start typing and I just figure "what's the point?" I hit Ctrl + A and Backspace and it's gone before it became a monstrosity in itself. An abortion of thought, though it would not be such a crime. It is not my being lazy because I have always been lazy and I still managed to write something decent. I guess I don't believe in it anymore.

You know that thing that carries you into this proverbial light where everything is clear and neat and beautiful. In that place, inspiration dwells, but in order to get there, you have to believe. You have to take a deep breath and be willing to let everything go, just for the exhale. You have to be addicted. Some people say that it's not an addiction but it is. Maybe I kicked it.

And that worries me so much. Because if that happened, I'm no longer who I am. I am no one. All the junk that I have to deal with, becomes more of a burden because I don't have the outlet. It's like a junkie going without a fix, or a mental person off the meds. Everything gets messed up, and what do you do when that happens?

SCREAM.

]]> ~A-Scarlett-torn http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/18863483/ http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/18863483/ Sun, 15 Jun 2008 22:03:30 PDT By the way, those who know Caufield and about the Class we auditioned for, mainly Ana-kun, if he thought that I needed more training, then why didn't he say that he wasn't going to put me in the class? I know that it's a little off topic but I was watching the Tony Award earlier.
And in case anyone was looking for the song that I mentioned in my last journal, I misspelled the Artist's name. Her name is Katy Perry, with an e. I doubt that you looked it up and gave it a listen but it's got a great beat and I listened to it six times non-stop until I could get the words down.
Anyway, I guess I'll talk more later. I gotta get some shut eye.

]]> ~A-Scarlett-torn http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/18791963/ http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/18791963/ Wed, 11 Jun 2008 20:43:04 PDT I watched some interesting programming before then. Some show about Denise Richards. I could have gone my entire life without even seeing it. Then I had a sandwich for breakfast, Turkey Pastrami with Munster Cheese, my favorite. Dad made this green stuff, he calls it callaloo. It's nasty. After that, Mother came home and we begin online shopping for this dress thing for Ana-kun's party. So we are going shopping tomorrow. It's not something that I particularly like doing but one has to make sacrifices. Got me some writer's block for anything other than my story/novel thing. Love ya. Byebers

]]> ~A-Scarlett-torn http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/18688875/ http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/18688875/ Thu, 05 Jun 2008 22:56:35 PDT
I went to the mall today and this guy who worked for this T-Mobile cart thing, was flirting with me. He asked how old I was. As soon as I told him 15, he was like "well It was nice talking to ya." Guys are gross. Except for Joey. How I miss seeing him, and Nick, this guy I met at the Latin Club Banquet , he's totally cute.

Byes.

]]> ~A-Scarlett-torn http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/18594366/ http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/18594366/ Sat, 31 May 2008 13:44:55 PDT
Welcome.

Well in school news, there are three days left of school. Honestly it doesn't seem real and I don't want it to be. I like school. I like order and my organized chaos. I like seeing my friends everyday. And by the way, when's your birthday, anakun? I don't remember. In fact, I don't remember much these days, because right now I'm supposed to be packing to spend the night at my cousin's house. Normally I don't have things to do on the weekend so this is why I forgot.

In personal news, I am going to die ALONE. I told my mother that I didn't care for boys. But I was wrong and I lied. Seasons like spring bug the crap out of me. Everyone's kissing and I'm this close all the time to puking out my guts. Also, I did this BMI test, just for the heck of it and it said that I was "at or below healthy maximum weight". Now what the hell does that mean? It's says that my weight is ideal. I think not and my mother thinks that this mentality is the beginning of an eating disorder, but not to fear, she'll speculate everything I eat and don't eat from now on.

In other news, I love talking politics with old people. I find that I know more about America's history then they do and they were alive when it happened. It's fun. Just so you don't think that I'm completely random, I will explain. I went to visit my grandmother, not of my old free will because she's mean, and we started talking about Watergate and the Kennedy assassination. She doesn't have Alzheimer's; she just doesn't know or she doesn't care. I don't know.

So I think that's it. I don't know.

Valete!

(Goodbye or Farewell in Latin)

]]> ~A-Scarlett-torn http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/18556290/ http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/18556290/ Thu, 29 May 2008 07:50:26 PDT Because really, it's all I think about. I think about how that day would have been different if I hadn't said it, but I did and there is nothing that can stop that. It's already been buried in someone's cerebellum and when they least expect it my name will be said and those words will be remembered.
There is no retraction, no takie backs. No way that those words could be pushed back into my mouth, down my throat and just not exist. Those things do not exist. Half of what I am doesn't exist.

]]> ~A-Scarlett-torn http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/18467345/ http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/18467345/ Fri, 23 May 2008 17:28:14 PDT
And I ask myself and you all. Why?

]]> ~A-Scarlett-torn http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/18449892/ http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/18449892/ Fri, 23 May 2008 17:20:40 PDT Anyway Joey seemed really nice. He smiled at me, and when I caught him in the halls one day, I asked him if he had a girlfriend, and he said no. Fast forward to like Tuesday, I am totally psyched in 3rd period because he looked into my eyes, then his eyes traveled down my body and up again, and I didn't feel uncomfortable or anything.
So I'm feeling rather good and the boy that sits in front of me, Cora I call him, asks me if there was something going on between Joey and I. I said no but I want there to be. His face leans downward and I know that something is wrong. I ask what is it and he refuses to tell me. I'm feeling generous so I don't pull his ears, instead I stop talking completely. He asks me then what's wrong and I say nothing, just not talking to you, that's all.
He finally passes me a note that says that all of his friends hate Joey. I ask why and he says that he doesn't know. I text Keniki and ask him about Joey. He texts me back and says that he smokes pot and that he's really annoying. Although he always thinks everyone is annoying and by the way Keniki is not his real name though either.
Skip to today where when I get out of third period and out in front of the cafe, I stop to talk to a girl friend of mine, Jess and all of a sudden I feel this hand, running down my arm. I look to my right and there he is walking off to his next class. With a second glance at me, he winks.
I feel my stomach fluttering and I smile back at him.
I reach the table where I normally sit with the geeks and freaks, those that I love. And leave again to print something out at the library.
17 minutes later...
I return to the table and stand around. Curly, again not real name. I call him that because of his hair, caught my eye and kept it, until he was within kissing range. He smelled of sweetness: Tag and musk, which I loved because it was him. I stumbled backward and he finally spoke, telling me about what I had miss when i was gone. How he had walked in this high heeled which made him even taller, which I couldn't, for the life of me, imagine.
Then he smiled, straight teeth for 2 and a half years of braces. Then he went back to his girlfriend.
It wasn't the first time that he had been so close to me. Everyday excluding today, he waited for me near my fourth period and hugged me. His hands always ended up on my hips when we pulled apart and we looked into each other's eyes for a minute before he realized that he was late for class, then he would walk hastily, never run, to his next period. He's a freshman. I'm a sophomore.
Oh how to end this?
I should probably end by saying that today and Tuesday were very interesting days and I know not what is going to happen tomorrow but hopefully Joey or Curly will make his move. I'm tired of waiting.
Or maybe I should do something but what?

]]> ~A-Scarlett-torn http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/18357415/ http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/18357415/ Fri, 16 May 2008 19:56:33 PDT It seems almost criminal
I make friends only to lose them
And my mother tells me to suck it up
As if these friends meant nothing
But they do
So I get all teary eyed and stupid
Even though I can't change what's happening
What's going to end up happening is:
I'm going to lose touch with them.
I'll forget to call or not want to bother them
Because I do in fact consider myself a bother.
I'll miss them
I guess.
Or maybe I'll just do it all over again.

]]> ~A-Scarlett-torn http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/18136626/ http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/18136626/ Fri, 02 May 2008 16:52:28 PDT
]]> ~A-Scarlett-torn http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/18072924/ http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/18072924/ Mon, 28 Apr 2008 15:25:43 PDT
So here it is, plain and simple.

I don't know who I am, much less, who I love. I don't want to hurt anybody and I don't want them to think that I have been leading them on. I haven't been lying, but I haven't been truthful either. Things have been so confusing that I didn't know what way was up.

I don't love anyone. I can use the word as much as I want but it won't change the fact I'm not willing to share myself with anyone. And until I am willing to share myself, I have no right to hold the heart of anyone.

So I'm letting him go. I'm letting my feelings for him subside until they are no more and they are one with the dust all around us. If he wants me to open up, then he doesn't love me the way he says he does. Because this is who I am, I am an empty shell of a person and who could love a person like that?

I had a chance to let him go before when he was angry with me but I couldn't take his anger. I couldn't take the fact that maybe someone could hate me even though he said that he didn't. I was so afraid, but I realize I was more afraid of what he thought of me than what I could do to myself if I was with him.

I find that even when I'm exhausted I'll pick up the phone when he calls and that's putting him before my school work, before myself. I don't think that's love. Or maybe it is and because I don't think that it's love, I'm not ready for love.

So I bid you all adieu. I say goodbye to all of you or maybe just him because after this, I don't think that he'll be talking to me ever again.

]]> ~A-Scarlett-torn http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/17803126/ http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/17803126/ Fri, 11 Apr 2008 21:33:57 PDT
]]> ~A-Scarlett-torn http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/17688146/ http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/17688146/ Fri, 04 Apr 2008 18:28:05 PDT
]]> ~A-Scarlett-torn http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/17659426/ http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/17659426/ Wed, 02 Apr 2008 21:46:42 PDT
I've recently rediscovered RFR, and for those who don't know what that is, well it's a Canadian TV show that is awesome, because it has all my favourite things. Music, Jokes, Cute Boys and An Underground Radio Station.

On Monday, I just chilled out. Went to visit my grams at the nursing home, then went to the store, got some groceries, then I watched Across The Universe starring Evan Rachel Wood and Jim Sturgess (which was freakin' awesome by the way.)

On Tuesday I went to Tampa, and visited the University of South Florida, and the University of Tampa. (That was also awesome, by the way) When I got home, I watched Wild Things starring Neve Campbell and Matt Dillon.

Today, or perhaps yesterday because it's about 12:27 so technically it's tomorrow. I watched I Am Sam starring Sean Penn, Michele Pfieffer, and Dakota Fanning. It was wonderful.

Tomorrow, I am going to North Florida to visit the University of North Florida, and the University of Florida. Going college scouting with my cousin.

Well that's all,

This has been fun, until the next time,

I'm Jude and this is the Weekend Update

PS. "Jude" Get it?

]]> ~A-Scarlett-torn http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/17561963/ http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/17561963/ Fri, 28 Mar 2008 18:07:05 PDT
Here's the latest:

School is out for Spring Holiday and I'm bored out of my skull.

Eric, my dearest, had his birthday on Wednesday.

Also on Wednesday, I gave this stoner a massage just because I felt like it.

On Thursday, I scrolled through the numbers in my phone and realized I didn't like half the people in there.

My World History teacher is an idiot because he gave us homework that doesn't actually exist.

I'm currently trying to get a guy to stop liking me.

And the guy I do like would probably get killed by my mother if he ever touched me.

Today, I went to the Boys and Girls club by my house and my mother volunteered me to tutor some kids.

Making me realize that I have no life and no free will.

I found a old map in my garage that was written in Latin.

Next week, I'm going on a road trip to check out the college that I want to go to.

With My Mother, how fun...

She's giving me advice on how to act when around people when she admits she doesn't even have friends.

And my personal favorite:

I am now able to predict the outcome of movies.....It's scary.

There's the latest and I'm deviously out of here.

]]> ~A-Scarlett-torn http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/17381322/ http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/17381322/ Mon, 17 Mar 2008 14:58:23 PDT I'm feeling sleepy. But that doesn't mean I'll sleep. I'm an insomniac, at best. Which means I'll just stay awake, which unfortunately for you, means I'll have to rant a little longer.
Someone asked me if there was any way I could stay quiet for ten minutes. I could, and the world could do without my voice, which is quite annoying, but that would mean making that someone happy, and I can't live to make others happy. It wouldn't be right.
I'll probably go to school tomorrow. Probably force myself. That's what I do. I force myself. I force myself to make decisions, to read books that I don't give a shit about to inadvertently make my mother happy. I force myself to be nice, to control my anger, to pretend that I don't hear the screams. I force myself to run so I'll stay skinny, to keep up the charade that I'm OK, but I'm not. I'm not OK, but that doesn't matter because I'll act OK. And acting OK is all that really matters.

]]> ~A-Scarlett-torn http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/17121511/ http://A-Scarlett-torn.deviantart.com/journal/17121511/ Fri, 29 Feb 2008 17:42:10 PST

How is everyone?



Well does anyone want to know how I am?



I'm not good because I like someone again and this time, he has a girlfriend.



I know, this is crap, right?



So....what's next?

]]> ~A-Scarlett-torn