http://search.deviantart.com/?q=by:BlackAngelAleera&section=today deviantART RSS for by:BlackAngelAleera en-us Copyright 2009, deviantART.com Sat, 05 Dec 2009 11:58:21 PST deviantART.com http://blogs.law.harvard.edu/tech/rss http://s.deviantart.com/minish/widgets/apple-touch-icon-precomposed.png http://BlackAngelAleera.deviantart.com/journal/13349884/ http://BlackAngelAleera.deviantart.com/journal/13349884/ Fri, 15 Jun 2007 00:11:29 PDT
The other thing, the thanks. That goes out to everyone who thanks me for favoriting their work. If I fave it, that means it's awsome! So thanks to everyone who is thanking me ^^ I find it hard to get back to everyone, so I hope you read this haha.

So yeah, I'm outa here in August, and I WILL get Jeremy back. We aren't together, but hopefully soon. I'm in love with him and I maintain that I'll never love anyone else. It's him, or no one! I LOVE YOU JEREMY ADAM PICKETT!!!

]]> ~BlackAngelAleera http://BlackAngelAleera.deviantart.com/journal/12847082/ http://BlackAngelAleera.deviantart.com/journal/12847082/ Sat, 05 May 2007 01:07:54 PDT
Sorry, I know it's been a while since I got on here. I plan on loading some of my poems on here as soon as I figure it out haha. The main purpose of this, is that I wanted to update everyone on what's been going on in my life. As a few of you know, I was dating a guy named Adam for a while. Well, we broke up a few weeks ago because we just weren't on the same page. Plus, I was dealing with one of my ex's having harbored feelings for me. I've talked to him since, and we're really good with remaining friends. Which is really good, because last week, another ex of mine, Jeremy, contacted me. Now, let me tell you a little about Jeremy

We met one another nearly three years ago, at Franklin County High School in Winchester, TN. Yes, I used to live out there. I was sitting at the lunch table on my first day there, having made friends with Amanda Dickerson and Courtney Thomas. They were also friends with him. They introduced me to everyone at the table but him, so I didn't notice right away. But then, we both looked each other in the eye at the exact, same time. Let me tell you, it was a damn good thing I was sitting haha. I would have fallen flat on my ass otherwise, from weak knees. I've only ever gotten weak knees from one other guy, and he was my soul mate, who died over 3 years ago. Truth be told, I was smitten with Jeremy instantly. We hung out a lot while I was out there, and became very close. Before I even realized it, I'd begun falling for him. I had to leave, we were moving back out here, to Cali. So, on my last day, I asked him to meet me outside my last class. But, as fate would have it, my mother showed up early and I had to go before he even got there. I wouldn't hear from him again for over a year.

In late September of 2005, I got help from a friend to create a Myspace. Now, by this point in the year, I'd had it for quite a while. So, I had heard from Courtney in the form of a letter, so I decide to see if I can find anyone on Myspace from FCHS. I typed in the school search engine, and as I was scrolling down, my eyes locked with those of the ones in a picture of a young man. Name, Jeremy Pickett. My intitial thoughts were, "No freaking way!" I looked at his profile and realized it was the boy I'd almost fallen for over a year earlier. So, I sent him a message asking if he remembered me and a friend request. Oh yeah, he remembered haha. We started talking constantly, through messages and on the phone. I remember the first time he called, I was so happy to hear his voice I could hardly stand it! We continued talking and the subject of that last day came up. I told him that I was going to tell him I liked him, and thought I had nothing to lose in telling him since I was leaving. His reaction, "You liked me? Really? Cause I liked you too..." So I told him, "Well, I guess now we'll never know, huh?" Now, before I tell you what he said after this, know that by this point we'd been talking for over a month. "Amanda, I still like you." I was in shock. I couldn't believe he'd held onto those feelings and that they could be rekindled by our phone conversations. Though I had to say, mine had been as well. So I told him the truth, "Well, Jeremy, I must say, I still like you too. But what can we do about it now?" Well I'll tell you what we did about it. We talked for hours about what we really wanted to do. It ended in agreeing to a long distance relationship. We cared deeply for each other, and it spanned through space between us. We couldn't deny how we felt for one another, and more importantly, we didn't want to. Then, I made my first mistake.

We'd been together for nearly a month, when I realized I had indeed fallen in love with him. I realized I had been all along, and that scared me. So, I ended it. Told him that the long distance was just too hard on me when I cared for him so much, and that I just wanted to remain friends. I cried myself to sleep for nights. But we would get another chance in just a couple months.

We remained in constant contact. Neither of us dated anyone else for, thought neither of us would admit it to the other, we didn't want to date anyone else. The middle of January 2006 came, and my grandma, my mamaw, was dying and they had called in all the family. Jeremy was the first person I called. I stayed on the phone with him all night, crying. He cooed to me and comforted me all through the night. We even left our phones on and fell asleep to the sound of eachother breathing. With that, my mom and I got on a plane to good ol' Winchester, TN. I called Jeremy the second I got inside my grandparents house. "Ok, give me directions. I'll come over now and we can hang out." I smiled and gladly gave him directions. He came, got me and we drove around and just hung out. By the time he pulled up in front of the house to drop me off again, we sat in the car and talked. We couldn't stand not being with one another,... ]]> ~BlackAngelAleera http://BlackAngelAleera.deviantart.com/journal/12188579/ http://BlackAngelAleera.deviantart.com/journal/12188579/ Thu, 15 Mar 2007 00:45:35 PDT
See, for the first nine years of my life, everything was perfect. I had amazing friends, a great family that never fought, I made good grades, I knew what I wanted to do from the time I was four, and I was happy.

Then, the morning after my nineth birthday, everything changed. My father, while on a job in Michigan(we lived in Wisconsin at the time), passed away. My mother became distraught and not herself at all. I, on the other hand, plunged into darkness. I became destructive with everything. Pushed away everyone, family, friends. I self destructed completely and became, a delinquent basically. I hung out with the wrong people for years.

Then, we moved to California and after years of feeling like an outsider, I put on a brave smile for the world. I just wanted to fit in, nothing more. I had lost myself the day my father died, and I didn't know how to find my true self again. I went into cheerleading and became captain, was the main actress in all the school productions, dated the quater back and I was the most popular girl on campus. But that was eighth grade. When I got to nineth, it was pretty much the same. I immidiately befriended the juniors and seniors, again with cheerleading, drama(theatre), still dating the same guy. I was untouchable. I hung out with only juniors and seniors and the so called, "in crowd". But, I still wasn't "me".

Then, on December 13th, 2003 at 5:04 am, my life would be forever changed. Through everything that had happened in my life, I had one constant, one presence that would never abandon me no matter what. He was Keiko. Those of you reading this know him as the orca who played Willy in the Free Willy films. I don't wish to go into great detail, only a small handful of people in my life know about his presence in my life at all. I will tell you that he and I have been connected since the time of my creation, my souls' creation. On the date and time I mentioned, he died. I had to see it on the news that afternoon, but I knew the moment he died, I just didn't understand right away. I was already ill at the time, and you can imagine what the death of ones soul mate can do to a person. I was many things after that happened. I estranged myself from everyone. For two weeks, I did not speak, eat(if I did, it was in front of my mother but I just threw it up later), sleep, show emotion, nothing. I was a shell, and I had simpley given up on life. It wasn't worth it anymore. I just didn't want to live. I attempted suicide, but the powers that be decided to not let it work by way of a friend of mine calling at the "right" moment. I didn't talk to him, but his call made me put the knife down.

On the marker of two weeks since Keiko had died, so as not to worry my mother, I allowed my friends to drag me to a movie. I still was not speaking or eating. The film was the live action version of Peter Pan and it was of great significance to my childhood. It gave me an outlet, and I cried, screamed and let the shell begin to crack around me. At the end of the film, I simpley said that I was hungry and wanted pizza. My friends rejoiced in my sudden comeback, but I still wasn't whole, nor was I entirely back. I started speaking, little by little after that. I ate a little, and gained my total appetite back after a few months.

It was during this time, that I met Jecca. She was concidered an outcast at the high school I was attending at the time. No one talked to her, and she didn't have any friends. At the time, I was still staying away from everyone I had as friends, and otherwise. I was a different person, and feared I wouldn't be accepted anymore. So, one day, I saw Jecca eating lunch by herself, and I sat with her. We starting talking, and she became my only companion for a long time. She was basically goth, a Wiccan and bi. It shocked her to find out that someone like me wasn't bothered by any of that. But it really didn't. She understood my pain and the way I was at the time. She accepted me and I ended up telling her everything that had happened to me. My past, my current state, and what I was afraid my future would become. She taught me all about Wicca, and I was fasinated by it. It's origins and ideals intrigued me to no end. More to the point, I understood it, and it traced me back to my Egyptian ambitions. I would not declare myself truely Wiccan for a further two years though. But she was the first to turn me on to it. We became very attatched, and I felt myself starting to view as a great deal more than a friend. I confessed my feelings to her, to find she... ]]> ~BlackAngelAleera http://BlackAngelAleera.deviantart.com/journal/11981683/ http://BlackAngelAleera.deviantart.com/journal/11981683/ Mon, 26 Feb 2007 23:23:38 PST
]]> ~BlackAngelAleera http://BlackAngelAleera.deviantart.com/journal/11716856/ http://BlackAngelAleera.deviantart.com/journal/11716856/ Tue, 06 Feb 2007 23:18:40 PST
~Aleera

]]> ~BlackAngelAleera http://BlackAngelAleera.deviantart.com/journal/11704269/ http://BlackAngelAleera.deviantart.com/journal/11704269/ Mon, 05 Feb 2007 22:47:07 PST I LOVE YOU CHLOE!!! She's my best friend who introduced me to deviantART.com so yay!!! So leave me comments and messages, and I'll get right to work on posting my pictures that I've done ok? GOOD!!!!! TTYL!!!!

~Aleera

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