http://search.deviantart.com/?q=by:BloodyRaven23&section=today deviantART RSS for by:BloodyRaven23 en-us Copyright 2009, deviantART.com Wed, 25 Nov 2009 01:46:17 PST deviantART.com http://blogs.law.harvard.edu/tech/rss http://s.deviantart.com/minish/widgets/apple-touch-icon-precomposed.png http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/23938306/ http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/23938306/ Sat, 28 Mar 2009 17:30:57 PDT "There is no such thing Alexis! He's just lying to you!"
"No he's not Raven! He really loves me!" Tears strolled down her rosy cheeks.
"Come on Alexis! It's only been two weeks and he's saying I love you?" She wiped a tear off Alexis' face.
"But I love him! He really does love me Raven I just know it!" She feel to the floor,covering her face. Raven wraps her arms around her.
"I just don't want you to get hurt."
"But Raven, I know he loves me and the only one that is hurting me," She released herself from Raven's hold.
"is you... and if you actually gave someone a chance to get close to you, you'll know how it feels!" Alexis ran out.
Raven paced her bedroom that night.
"Maybe she is right. Who am I to judge when I've never been in love? I'm such in idiot!"
She fell backwards on her bed and began to cry.
~
Im so alone in this world, with no one but you..

Im so alone in this world, what can I even think to do

when all I ever want is to be with you.

You take away all my fears
when I feel that death is coming near.
You remind me what im all about
even when
Im so deep in doubt.
~~
She walks in the dark night, tears rolling down her face.The fear inside keeps her at a slow pace. "How can I look at them? How can I tell them?" Her sobbing growing louder and louder as she drew closer and closer to home."They won't understand. They just can't" She stopped dead cold in her tracks."I can't go home. I can't face them. It won't work out!" she yelled out loud.She quickly heads the opposite direction, now rushing. As she wipes the tears off her face she feelsa sense of relief, like she's wiping the fear and sadness that consumes her now."No! I can't do this. There's no point in running. I have to face them." She turns backs towards her first destination but pauses. Hurt so many times by the ones she loves, she thinks about what's to come. She has been emotionally scared by the ones that "love" her and left feeling that that's the only thing she can count on,hurt. She inhales deep and begins to walk. "They just want me to have a good future and by having an exceeding education can guarantee that. This will prepare me like nothing else. Opportunities are going to be thrown at me as much as I breathe air. She gets self confidence and rushes home. (she didn't want it to escape her and leave her vulnerable.) "Maybe I'm wrong and I just need to relax. Just put this behind me." she finally reaches her home. Taking a deep breath, she turns the knob and enters. She looks to find her family."I'm home. Ohhh. Hey Daddy."
~~~
It all started with a fight just like any other I had before. However,the ending was like no other. I could never of guessed it to be true, and to this day, it still sends shivers down my spine. It's a night that is never to be forgotten. Just like I ended every brawl with my mother, I charged into my room, slammed the door behind me, and turned on my music. I fell on top my bed, grasping my pillow tightly as I cried. It's suppose to be a peaceful summer night, not a full out battle where everyone is left in pain.I reached under my blankets and grabbed my DVD player remote and programed it to play one song on the CD. Evil Angel. I turned the volume up loud enough to drown out my cries for a night
of peace instead of war and my huffing and puffing. It didn't work. I tightened my grip on my pillow so tight,the stuffing could of poured
out any second.
~~~~
I need to be with you again
I need you in my arms again
I need to hear you to say "I love you'
again

I need you
How can I survive
When I want to be with you

Your the light in my life
And it drives me crazy
That somehow you are gone
How could you be gone?

I'm waiting to be with you
I need to be with you.

]]> ~BloodyRaven23 http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/23922075/ http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/23922075/ Fri, 27 Mar 2009 18:19:19 PDT
^-^

I havent written a journal in like, over a month! Almost 2!!

so I write this now!

without anything to say!

So bye!!

OMGEE! WAIT!!

Im going to see Cute Is What We Aim For in concert! Im taking my friend for her birthday!
I LOVE HER!! And we are going to have so much fun!

.........
I accidentally told this dude something, and even though i can totally say its a lie, I'm not.

]]> ~BloodyRaven23 http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/23112765/ http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/23112765/ Mon, 09 Feb 2009 22:57:00 PST
After many years of separation, they made many people's dreams/wishes come true.

They are an amazing group, my favorite group in the world, and for them to reunite is a miracle.

When I found out, I couldn't stop crying. This band means everything to me, and without them, there is no reason to listen to music!

]]> ~BloodyRaven23 http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/23050377/ http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/23050377/ Fri, 06 Feb 2009 22:08:22 PST
but then again, it was meant for a guy to take!
= D

Here is what I'm talking about for the people who think i'm slightly crazy?

wait, am I crazy?! I do have problems... >>;;

Any ways....

HERE IT IS::
[link]

So....

I'M GOING AWAY FOR THE SUMMER!!!!!

Hopefully to, [link]

or

[link]

I pick those two....
my teachers should be happy about it.... If not, OFF WIT THEIR FUCKING HEADS!!!
(sorry for the bad word! shame on me!)

"I stare at the moon in awe. Why? Well why wouldn't I? It's always there, looking as gorgeous as is. Gosh... If only I can speak to the moon. If only it will speak back.."

random, but I'm beginning to love this thing I made up.

So... what can I tell you?
I love you?
I hate you?

what??
OMGEE!

I can put the little hair I have in a ponytail! IT FEELS AWESOME!! and I gave myself a little emo bang for now!

gahh... i took it off!

OMFG! sorry for the ramble!!!!
you should totally comment it for fun!


Short confession....

I think I like him...like, really really like him.... = (

]]> ~BloodyRaven23 http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/22953920/ http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/22953920/ Sun, 01 Feb 2009 21:58:18 PST
TEN things you wish you could say to TEN different people right now:
10) You all are a bunch of wannabe stuck up princesses and ALL OF YOU ARE FAKE AS FUCK! (All but 4 kids in my classes)
9) I still want to be friends. I miss being stupid with you. (SBSP)
8) I hate you, and when I get the chance, I'm leaving and never coming back. I promise you that." (M)
7) BE MORE CONFIDENT!AND GET OUT THERE!! You are beautiful in your own way, and any guy would love that about you. (C)
6) Self pity doesnt fit a beautiful girl. So give up your fuckin bull shit, and face the truth! (you are perfect the way you are) (j)
5) I think you are super cute for someone to go to our school! (R)
4) Saw you twice and you interest me in a way where I want to spend time with you. (A)
3) You fuckin freak me out. Not in a good way. (I)
2)THE STEELERS WON! (anyone who cares)
1) You'll get though this all and YOU will be on top! (Myseld)
NINE things about yourself:
9) I LOVE MUSIC!
8) Lazy
7) I hold back too much
6) I dont trust people
5) I think I will never have a family that will care about me.
4) Although I can't go to many, I'm concert obsessed!
3) I can't start my homework till 12 in the morning the day it's due.
2) I'm too forgiving!!!!
1) I'm passing with a 3.85 GPA and I'm not even trying.

EIGHT ways to win your heart:
8) Be able to have a good time with me just being on the couch!
7) Be a smart-ass, because I am one, and if you can't take it, then no point in being with me.
6) Accept, and MAYBE encourage my pervyness!
5) Make me laugh.
4) Don't shower me with gifts!
3) SILENCE IS NOT GOLDEN! If you have something to say, then say it!
2) Click with my friends! Very bad for you if you dont.
1) Music. Music is the #1 way to my heart.

SEVEN things that cross your mind a lot:
7) Yaoi
6) the day I leave off to be independent
5) My summer plans
4) Dirty jokes!
3) CARPE DIEM!
2) Music!
1) Someone who will make me happy

SIX things you do before you fall asleep:
6) Finish my hw
5) Check my cell for the time
4) Check FB/MS/DA
3) Watch a little tv/listen to msuic
2) Determine where I am going to sleep
1) Get comfy and shut my eyes

FIVE people who mean a lot at the moment:
5) The one guy that is going to make things better
4) Myself- I have issues....
3) Melanie
2) Amy
1) Crystal

FOUR things you see right now:
4) My comp
3) A Clown
2) My leg
1) Speakers

THREE songs that you listen to often at the moment:
3) America's Suitehearts- Fall Out Boy
2) On the Floor- DJ Caffeine
1) Still Fly- Devil Wears Prada

TWO things you want to do before you die:
2) Be successful pediatric psychologist
1) Have a family, that loves me as much as I would love them

ONE confession:
1) I just watched the Bratz movie...I feel ashamed!

]]> ~BloodyRaven23 http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/22762070/ http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/22762070/ Fri, 23 Jan 2009 14:45:30 PST
I thought I was going to do bad because of my oral exam, but i passed with a B!

CHANESS!!

I think what really helped me was not studying and writing myspace messages to my friend in Russian!!!

OMG! I didn't get a D in AP World

SO YAY ME FOR THAT!!!!!!!

And I'm 99.99% SURE that I'm going out of state again for this summer! YAYS!!!!!

School still sucks.
Home isn't getting better.
BUT I'M A SURVIVOR!!!!!!!!!!


*giggles*

School is half way done and summer ish coming!
So I'm having a real high at the moment!

BTW!!

A movie everyone should see is
Slumdog Millionaire!
It's a great movie!!!!











I the new DA!


]]> ~BloodyRaven23 http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/22700539/ http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/22700539/ Tue, 20 Jan 2009 18:08:57 PST Escape The Fate:
March 1st/11th


Senses Fail:
March 17th


Cute Is What We Aim For:
March 30th


A Day To Remember:
April 10th


We The Kings:
April 20th


New Found Glory:
April 25th


Fall Out Boy:
May 9th

Most of these bands are performing with other AWESOME bands...

like FOB is going to be with Metro Station and All Time Low.

Senses Fail is going to be with Hollywood Undead.

There is no way I can see these concerts....Which I would kill to go see!!! GOSH! I hate being poor and without a drivers license!

]]> ~BloodyRaven23 http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/22651189/ http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/22651189/ Sun, 18 Jan 2009 11:18:38 PST
Well I know my time all to well..

The greatest time of life.
The time that saved my life.
The time where there was no masks.
No hurt.
Just love...

As great as it all was, I can't dare to remember it all.

It's just to hard....

It was so perfect, heaven in its own way, and when I left it....

It was a Cinderella Story of my life that didn't end the way a normal fairy tale would....

gosh....

it hurts so much...

I want it all...

no,

just him

]]> ~BloodyRaven23 http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/22401696/ http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/22401696/ Sat, 10 Jan 2009 12:19:10 PST and foolish in minor key
The best
part is breathin' it
constantly
Can you feel it
Can
you hear it I'm screamin'

ooh -
no I can't stop lovin' you, won't
stop lovin' you

-Made‡Avail!
‡‡‡‡‡‡‡‡‡‡‡‡‡‡‡‡

Concert was sooo much fun!!!
A Kidnap In Color was amazing and so was Made Avail!!!!

School is starting tomorrow and I have a weeks worth of homework due on Tuesday! Gosh! I could of had it done, but my cousins came over, and longer than expected!

I know! I should of done it and not waited till the last minute, but I'm a huge procrastinator! Plus, I got majority of my Monday homework done, and I usually don't stat that till late, the night before school! So YAY ME! I'm getting some what better!

love to all DA people! I love them the most!

Btw, my pageviews is at 3,968 at the moment! Almost to 4,00! I'm so proud!!!!!

*****************

I MADE IT!!! YAY!!!! THANKS SO MUCH FOR VISITING MY PAGE AND ALL THE COMMENTS/FAVS!!!
IT MEANS SO MUCH TO ME AND I GREATLY APPRECIATE IT!!!

]]> ~BloodyRaven23 http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/22245171/ http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/22245171/ Sun, 28 Dec 2008 15:19:01 PST
THE RESULTS ARE IN!!!

FACEBOOK IS THE WINNER!!!

Okay, like every couple of months Myspace makes changes that Facebook has! Just today I logged on my Myspace and noticed a new thing. Myspace know offers "add people you may know." Everyone who has a Facebook knows that it's just the same....

GOSH!

Stupid Myspace!

That's it, everyone drop myspace and got to the amazing Facebook!

ummmm.....

yea, I can't do that so you don't have to either! x P

BTW!!

Crystal get ready for the CONCERT!!!

It's going to be amazing!!!!!!

]]> ~BloodyRaven23 http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/22167181/ http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/22167181/ Wed, 24 Dec 2008 13:18:37 PST


]]> ~BloodyRaven23 http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/21968954/ http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/21968954/ Sat, 13 Dec 2008 18:50:12 PST
Taggness:

1.Grab the book nearest to you, turn to page 18, and find line 4.
*No book near me! Srry!

2.Stretch your left arm out as far as you can. What do you reach?
*Laundry Bag...Stupid Laundry!

3. What is the last thing you watched on TV?
*13 going on 30

4. Without looking, guess what time it is:
*8:24

5. Now look at the clock. What is the actual time?
*8:26

6. With the exception of the computer, what can you hear?
*I'm listening to All Time Low!

7. When did you last step outside? What were you doing?
*Like maybe less than half an hour ago. In front to get pizza

8. Before you started this survey, what did you look at?
*Myspace

9. What are you wearing?
*Black Joggers, Death Note shirt, And a black sweater

10. Did you dream last night?
*Yup. I had a dream that the one person that I wanted more than anybody else, came to my winter concert on Tuesday. But I got a call that told me that dreams don't come true.

11. When did you last laugh?
* When I told my Dad that we got the delivery guy fired!

12. What are on the walls of the room you are in?
*X-mas stuffies

13. Seen anything weird lately?
*My cousin

14. What do you think of this quiz?
*If I wasnt bored and jammin out to one of MY FAV ATL SONGS!!! (like #3)
[[Dear Maria Count Me In!]]

15. What is the last film you saw?
- 13 going on 30

16. If you became a multi-millionaire overnight, what would you buy?
*I'll pay for mine and my sister's education costs... And start off my own clinic once I get my Doctor's Degree

17. Tell me something about you that I don't know about.
*I'm trying to get my cousin to see if I can get a little promotion job for bands that play at the HOUSE OF BLUES!
I'll be happy if I can just pass out flyers!

18. If you could change one thing about the world, regardless of guilt or politics, what would you do?
*Focus more on our Economic Issues that result in a way to resolve them rather than give all the money away so these people can get stupid ass rasies

19. Do you like to dance?
*Like all the time!!!!!!!!!

20. George Bush:
*Is such an idiot that he had to be hidden throughout the whole election so he won't do something RETARDED

21. Imagine your first child is a girl, what do you call her?
*Annie

22. Imagine your first child is a boy, what do you call him?
*Jacob or Jake! or James!

23. Would you ever consider living abroad?
*Without a doubt!

24. What do you want God to say to you when you reach the pearly gates?
*Sorry, that you were wrong, but I do exists and I regret what I did to you...

But no God IN MY LIFE! So when I die, I die!

]]> ~BloodyRaven23 http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/21852957/ http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/21852957/ Sat, 06 Dec 2008 18:31:41 PST
she ignores me the most.

great.

I finally admit my deepest darkest secrets and all I get is a lie.


thanks.

]]> ~BloodyRaven23 http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/21620010/ http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/21620010/ Sat, 22 Nov 2008 19:20:23 PST I'm disappointment
I'm a bad example
I'm a waste of time.
I AM NOTHING!!

not you
not to them
not to myself

yes, even I am starting to beielve the truth within these statements, within these facts.

I am nothing.

]]> ~BloodyRaven23 http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/21521554/ http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/21521554/ Sun, 16 Nov 2008 15:54:28 PST you'll be alone...
No matter what you say,
you'll be alone...
you'll be ignored...
No matter how you look,
you'll be alone...
you'll be ignored...
you'll be hurt..
No matter how much you care,
you'll still be alone...
you'll still be ignored...
you'll still be hurt...
you WILL be empty.

So what's the point?

-Living
**BY:RAVEN**

Sick of having to depend on others, she tries to save up for her new life, but that never works. All her hard earnings disappear for their mistakes. She is trapped, as she is well aware of, and the more she tries to escape, the worse it becomes. She tries and she tries to plan a way to get out alive, but nothing ever works. Except that one time. That one time she did managed to escape in to another world far from her own. It was beautiful. It was magical. It ended with what she recalls as a grand ball. Oh how the night of the ball was a fairy tale come true. The fairy tale she always wanted. Wait that's not correct, it was a fairy tale more than she could ever want. Not even in her wildest dreams she could conjure up this grand ball, or that grand prince she had met. Yes, like in every fairy tale, there was a prince. A prince that swept off her feet, both figuratively and literally. A prince that was not like any other. One that let her simply be her, not holding back. Sadly, the clock stroked and their time together had to end. They leave the ball together hand and hand. (She never wanted to let go. She still doesn't want to let go.) Eventually the royal guards came and there time was permanently over. They hugged, and he let go. She was shocked how quick it all ended, but it did. She turned away, head down, and walked away. She couldn't look at him. She couldn't look in his eyes as she said goodbye. So she didn't look up. She didn't say goodbye. She just left with her head down, hoping he wouldn't catch her tears falling. She waled to her home, and met up with her friends that just returned from the grand ball. One of them took her in their arms, because they saw her tears. They all forced her in to a group hug. It'll be okay they all assured her. They gathered together for a group picture. "We will never forget each other." Sadly, right then it hit her. This fairy tale she was living in far from home is ending. That morning she is off to where she supposedly belongs. Away from this kingdom, and that morning she did leave. She returned to darkness knowing that she would never return to that kingdom ever again, that she will never be with her only prince again....

]]> ~BloodyRaven23 http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/21375391/ http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/21375391/ Fri, 07 Nov 2008 16:06:29 PST The motor in my head turns
Wanting you for such a long time
In my mind, a heart, a lesson to learn

Do do do do do do do do
You'll never know,
I'm after you

Do do do do do do do do
You'll never know

And you smell like,
How angels oughta smell
And you look like
You're ready to go

So hold my hand
I'll take you everywhere
Anywhere
You wanna go

The way your words keep me in a line
I know what I'm here for
Waking up to the green of your eyes
It's something I'll get used to (Oh!)

Do do do do do do do do
You'll never know,
I'm after you

Do do do do do do do do
You'll never know

And you smell like,
How angels oughta smell
And you look like
You're ready to go

So hold my hand
I'll take you everywhere
Anywhere
You wanna go

So come on and hold my hand (Hold my hand)
I'll take you everywhere (Everywhere)
Anywhere
I'll take you anywhere
So let's go

The way your hair swings over your eyes
The way your words keep me in a line
I'm telling you for the very last time
You better know

And you smell like,
How angels oughta smell
And you look like
You're ready to go

So hold my hand
I'll take you everywhere
Anywhere
You wanna go

So come on and hold my hand (Hold my hand)
I'll take you everywhere (Everywhere)
Anywhere
You wanna go

Do do do do do do do do
Do do do do do do do do
Do do do do do do do do
Do do do do do do do do

So come on and hold my hand (Hold my hand)
I'll take you everywhere (Everywhere)
Anywhere
You wanna go

So come on and hold my hand (Hold my hand)
I'll take you everywhere (Everywhere)
Anywhere
You wanna go

]]> ~BloodyRaven23 http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/21327448/ http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/21327448/ Tue, 04 Nov 2008 20:33:30 PST

GO OBAMA!!!!!!!


SO EXCITED!!!

AND HERE IN CHICAGO, EVERYONE IS GOING CRAZY!

]]> ~BloodyRaven23 http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/21174746/ http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/21174746/ Sun, 26 Oct 2008 16:35:13 PDT
The title of the songs,

The lyrics of the songs,

and the order of the songs,

They all are telling the same story:

In the time of her independence of everyone,

In the time of her happiness,

He will come

And it will be gone.

It's all about their love.

It's all about their happiness.

It's all about their independence.

When all is too real,

For he is her one and only

Her first and only

it will come.

The time of darkness.

The time of misery.

The time of lonely.

She will be left in the cold

Without a heart

her heart.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
~~notes and chords, rhythms and~~
~~rhymes, all end the same song ~~
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


Good luck love!
I told you that it is going to happen to you!

]]> ~BloodyRaven23 http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/21101334/ http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/21101334/ Tue, 21 Oct 2008 19:35:54 PDT
It's all too weird for me! and that's something to take into account for. Maybe I'm just being retarted, but like, grrrr!

So like, ever since I saw the movie Sydney White, I've been more obsessed with getting my own dork! Cuz i love them so much! They are soo adorable and sweet and freaking amazing! MY KIND OF GUYS! They are always the guys people always seem to over look, but they are always the ones to catch my eye

So all week, I've been haunted by religious stuffs! NO JOKE!!!! It's liek I can't escape it! it's killing me on the inside, and is scaring me. Then today, I found out my friend got back together with her ex, HER PASTOR'S SON! weird!! SO that got me feeling more haunted by this BS. but it also got me thinking of what would it be like to date a church boy! and I got to thinking that it might be fun! I might even be able to corrupt his mind

but that kinda got me a little sad, cuz everyone is getting wit someone and I've been feeling so lonely! and this ass whole keeps messing with me! calling me sexy and that he wants me and such! It's soo disturbing, but it makes me want a bf even more! TT_TT

Then, omfg, then she had to show me him!!! *faints*



HE IS AN ANGEL! SEXY! AND A DORK!
everything I could ever want!

I was really thinking bout getting a bf today and she shows me him! *sighs*

*He looks sooo cute!
*He is supposedly a dork! A SUPER DORK! (how hot?)
*He is a CHURCH BOY! (wtf? just when I am being haunted and curious, one pops up?)
*HE DOEsN'T LIVE THAT FAR FROM MY FRIEND AND I PRACTICALLY LIVE AT HER HOUSE!!! (very convient[sp?])


the timing is soooo weird!
LOL! When I first saw him I was totally goo goo gah gah for him!

Im super hyper nad havent started my homework! SHAME ON ME!!!

http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/21098688/ Tue, 21 Oct 2008 16:55:00 PDT Flowing through the hour glass
Time to let go of all we know
and break our hearts in stride.

I need you now more like yesterday
The last day I could see you smile.
For the last time turn out the lights
My life on standby.

So standby and watch
This fall away and fall apart.

Just say that it's over,
It's over and she's gone.
(NOW... SHE'S...GONE)

Don't worry he Said,
and she's not coming home.
(SHE'S....NOT...COMING...HOME)

It's over and she's gone.

The distance and my hearts to sand
Flowing through the hour glass.
I fall to pieces, I can't let go
Of all the times I never said goodbye.

Just say that it's over,
It's over and she's gone.
(NOW... SHE'S...GONE)

Don't worry he said,
and she's not coming home.
(SHE'S....NOT...COMING...HOME)

It's over and she's gone.

Wake up

WAKE UP! WAKE UP! WAKE UP!
(WAKE UP!) Wake up now it's over...
(WAKE UP!) Just tell me it's ok to die
(WAKE UP!) Wake up now it's over...
(WAKE UP!) Just tell me it's ok to die

Wake up now it's over...
just tell me it's ok to die
Wake up now it's over...
just tell me it's ok to die

]]> ~BloodyRaven23 http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/20642430/ http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/20642430/ Tue, 23 Sep 2008 19:50:26 PDT
I'm only a couple days [[estimated]]

until i reach a mental breakdown!

Isn't that grand?

Gosh....

this is going to be rough!!



i actually have poems to submit!!!

cha!!!

]]> ~BloodyRaven23 http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/20609914/ http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/20609914/ Sun, 21 Sep 2008 21:03:25 PDT
Before, at the very bottom of the DA page, they had a clicky part where you can click and visit a random deviant or a random deviantation. WHAT HAPPENED TO THIS?!?!

That's how I found very good people to watch and art work to fav!

very sad, but that's the DA life.

OMG! OMG! OMG!!!

I still don't understand how I managed to get any favs. Really, I don't, but this makes me appreciate them even more!

Even though it doesn't speak to me anymore, it speaks to someone else!

SO THANKS FOR THE FAVS AND EVEN THE WATCHES!!!! I <3 YOU ALL!
~*~*~*~*~*~*~

TO THE PEOPLE WHO CAN ACTUALLY VOTE IN THE UPCOMING ELECTION!!!!!

PLEASE REALLY THINK ABOUT YOU CHOICE AND VOTE!!! MY LIFE AND SO MANY OTHERS DEPEND ON YOUR SINGLE VOTE!!!!!!

[[this is based on the fantasy that our votes do actually count for something]]

]]> ~BloodyRaven23 http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/20227061/ http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/20227061/ Fri, 29 Aug 2008 22:00:35 PDT

So sad....

I think it's just because I dont liek this version and prefer the old one

I wish they gave us a choice >
I was reading my old submissions and they really suck

Im suprise anyone ever faved them


chanks though!

]]> ~BloodyRaven23 http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/19969948/ http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/19969948/ Fri, 15 Aug 2008 12:24:05 PDT
im back home.

perfect....

I don't want to be back but okay

nothin new

I met amazing people

then I left them

I met an amazing person

Then i left him...

perfect...

just perfet....

i wanna go back to fairytale land

it was amazing

exciting

freeing

just perfect in every way

eh

now im here

school starts in a week

perfect

i miss them, and i miss him
-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-

the fairytale is over but the story will live on forever

]]> ~BloodyRaven23 http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/19502953/ http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/19502953/ Sun, 20 Jul 2008 15:58:33 PDT
cha!

I'm making it...I guess.....

People here are cool but not as amusing...

I got sucked in the Twilight phenomenon!!!


Grrrrr!!!!!!!!!!1

But its so amazing!!!

cept I hate the whole Jacob thing!!!!! He's too god for her!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

But I am a die hard Edward fan!!! <3333

Im alive...
\
I did the whole boy obsession to get over my stupid ex....

That didn't work at all....


Man, when it rains here, it rains!

I like it.....

If its not hot and shiny, its rainy and gloomy....

Its soo weird that I started reading Twilight here... toooo many similarities here!!!

gosh....


I wish I could be on DA more...
[[and finally get use to this new version.]

but i do have poems to submit!!! YAYS!!

but I'll do that when I get back home!

Saw the new batman movie

It was amzing, but I was disappointed with a part of it...

[[I'll discuss it later! I dont want to give things up!]]

well i don't know what else to say...

I've been pretty blah here...

3 more weeks to go!!!

well I got to do poetry homework!!!

Can I ask a fav?

Which of my poems do you like the best???

FEELS GOOD HAVE THE MOOD CHANGED!!!

]]> ~BloodyRaven23 http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/19268614/ http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/19268614/ Tue, 08 Jul 2008 07:15:02 PDT
Nice school....

Nice campus.....

Nice library....

But not nice at all cause I don't have you!!!

So I didn't have classes early in the morning like the people I hang out with do... So i'm in the library... on the compy.... and wating till aaround 10:15 ish to go to the assembly......

after that I have Discovering poeetry, cute New Yorker in that class, and then I have Media and Society, cute french guy with a kickass accent!. Then I'm free till 2. At 2 i have crew. Yes. I signed up for crew cause I didnt know what else to do! [[for those who dont know, its the people that row in a boat]]

I miss you so much!!!

Hopefully this place will get more better...I have a little to much free time as of now, but this is just the first week and our schedule is different...

Its weird with the time change only a little. It only is beccause I would want to call some one in Chiccago, but it'll be to early to call them! Stupid 1 hour difference..

lalalala

trying to stall here....

It's only 9:54

I already did my homework....

[[and no, i did not do any smexy germans! yet...]]

Ohh! It's 9:55! a whole minute has passed!

now 56

Gosh...

maybe I'll go back to my dorm and try to sleep a little.. [[ 57 ]]

But watch me sleep though the assembly and miss class, ON THE SECOND DAY!

[[ 58 ]]

Okay....There are kids from all over the world here, but why do they look all the SAME?!?!

Its diverse but in a way, its kinda not..... Strange!!! [[ 59 ]]

Being here is kinda intimidating[[sp?]]

[[ 10:00 ]]

There are rich kids who been all over the world! and I've only been in Chicago.... There are kids who paid for this program!! ALL OF IT!!
[[ 01 ]]

and I had a full scholorship..

I actually heard a girl say that she brought 35 shirts.. One for each day here... grr... [[ 02 ]] snoby people.

My romate is really cool and really nice...

probably because she made me get top bunk... grr...

It's actually not that bad...

[[ 03 ]]

I didn't get in bed till 2 last night and I was just listening to music, but once I feel asleep, i slept good and long... [[ 04 ]]

but the stupid alarm woked me up...

[[ 05 ]] This journal is long... and kinda pointless... but hey, its wasting time and informing people on what i'm doing, or not doing....

[[ 06 ]] A funny thing is, that the school cuts off all internet acess at EXACTLY 11 o'clock...

It didn't even wait till 11:01
[[ 07 ]]

Hopefully I'll write or draw stuff and post it here!! These people most difenatily have to have a scccanner... somewher.... >>?
[[ 08 ]]

so...ummm....
[[ 09 ]]

Its really quiet around here...

no sirens or anything! kinda makes it hard to sleep...

PEEK A BOO! I SEE YOU!!!

LOL random... [[ 10 ]]

I got 10 minutes left till it starts...
but i gots 5, no now 4 [[ 11 ]] till these people get out of class...

sweet [[ 12 ]] now its 3 minutes till!

well ima go...take my time walking there and finding people....

I miss city life...but I can live with this... [no choice]]

[[13]]

BYE!!

]]> ~BloodyRaven23 http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/19188419/ http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/19188419/ Thu, 03 Jul 2008 17:08:59 PDT
3000 PAGEVIEWS!!!

THANK YOU SO MUCH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I LOVE YOU ALL!!!!!

KEEP FAVING AND COMMENTING AND EVERYTHING ELSE!!!!!!!!!



I LOVE YOU ALL!!!!!!!!

[[I WANT THE MOOD ICONS BACK! >
]]> ~BloodyRaven23 http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/19078527/ http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/19078527/ Fri, 27 Jun 2008 15:38:58 PDT

You come to me with scars on your wrist
You tell me this will be the last
night feeling like this
I just came to say goodbye
I didn't want you to see me cry, I'm fine
But I know it's a lie

[ Chorus: ]
This is the last night you'll spend alone
Look me in the eyes so I know you know
I'm everywhere you want me to be
The last night you'll spend alone
I'll wrap you in my arms and I won't let go
I'm everything You need me to be

Your parents say everything is your fault
But they don't know you like
I know you they don't know
you at all

I'm so sick of when they say
It's just a phase, you'll be o.k. you're fine
But I know it's a lie

[ Chorus: ]
This is the last night you'll spend alone
Look me in the eyes so I know you know
I'm everywhere you want me to be
The last night you'll spend alone
I'll wrap you in my arms and I won't let go
I'm everything You need me to be
The last night away from me

[ Bridge: ]
The night is so long when everything's wrong
If you give me your hand
I will help you hold on
Tonight
Tonight

[ Chorus: ]
This is the last night you'll spend alone
Look me in the eyes so I know you know
I'm everywhere you want me to be
The last night you'll spend alone
I'll wrap you in my arms and I won't let go
I'm everything You need me to be

[ Altro: ]
I won't let you say goodbye
And I'll be your reason why
The last night away from me
Away from me
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
**Rain is falling hard. Lighting flashing every second, in every direction. The thunder roaring so loud, car alarms going off, the tree beating against the house. The house too begins to shake.
She rocks back and forth in her little corner in her room, hands over her ears, trying to drown out all the noises, to drown out her cries, the voices. She's frighten and doesn't know what to know what to do, so she rocks back and forth faster...
"STOP!" she screamed, her face beat red. she screams at the top of her lungs,"PLEASE STOP! PLEASE" She pulls at her hair, still rocking back and forth. "Fine," she stops rocking adn only little tears stream down her cheecks. "I'll do it".
She slowly crawls towards a small box on the floor. SHe opens it. In the small box was a shiny object. A razor.

She grabbed it, "I'll do it."

]]> ~BloodyRaven23 http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/18718899/ http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/18718899/ Sat, 07 Jun 2008 18:23:02 PDT
Might not be suitable for all ages!:::


Here is your deck of cards of relationships
[[sexual tension wise]]

numbers only ( x P'' )

2: Flirt
3: hug
4: hold hands
5: kiss on the cheeks
6: Peck on the lips
7: The kiss
8: The makeout session
9: The first grope
10: Can't keep your/ his hands off
Jack: On top of the bed, but nothing
Queen: On top of the bed and 5 secs away from somethin
King: Oral
Ace: Intercourse


How many cards are missing from your deck?? adn which ones????

LMAO!
I STILL HAVE MY ACE!
[[really not approprite, but like oh well]]

]]> ~BloodyRaven23 http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/17903637/ http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/17903637/ Thu, 17 Apr 2008 21:07:57 PDT Starting making his way past 2 in the morning
He hasn't been sober for days

Leaning out into the breeze
Remembering Sunday, he falls to his knees
They had breakfast together
But two eggs don't last
Like the feeling of what he needs

Now this place is familiar to him
She pulls on his hand with a devilish grin
She led him upstairs, she led him upstairs
Left him dying to get in

Forgive me, I'm trying to find
My calling, I'm calling at night
I don't mean to be a bother,
But have you seen this girl?
She's been running through my dreams
And it's driving me crazy, it seems
I'm going to ask her to marry me

Even though she doesn't believe in love,
He's determined to call her bluff
Who could deny these butterflies?
They're filling his gut

Waking the neighbors, unfamiliar faces
He pleads though he tries
But he's only denied
Now he's dying to get inside

Forgive me, I'm trying to find
My calling, I'm calling at night
I don't mean to be a bother,
But have you seen this girl?
She's been running through my dreams
And it's driving me crazy, it seems
I'm going to ask her to marry me

The neighbors said she moved away
Funny how it rained all day
I didn't think much of it then
But it's starting to all make sense
Oh, I can see now that all of these clouds
Are following me in my desperate endeavor
To find my whoever, wherever she may be

[Juliet Simms:]
I'm not coming back, I've done something so terrible
I'm terrified to speak, but you'd expect that from me
I'm mixed up, I'll be blunt; now the rain is
Washing you out of my hair and out of my mind
Keeping an eye on the world,
So many thousands of feet off the ground
I'm over you now I'm at home in the clouds
Towering over your head

[Alex Gaskarth:]
I guess I'll go home now
I guess I'll go home now
I guess I'll go home now
I guess I'll go home
-----------
listen to this song. Its beautiful. Very emotional. I'm strongly addicted.

All Time Low is a kickass, amazing band! give them a shot would ya?

and Juliet Simms' voice is so powerful! I love her part the most!

ohhh!

and if you haven't read The Kite Runner,

DO SO! IT"S AMAZING!

]]> ~BloodyRaven23 http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/17839779/ http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/17839779/ Sun, 13 Apr 2008 21:02:49 PDT I swear to God we've been down this road before The guilt's no good, and it only shames us more And the truths that we all try to hide, are so much clearer when its not our lives When we don't face the blame

She rocked back in forth, grasping her little teddy bear in hope to find comfort in her cold dark room. In her cold, dark, lonely soul.....
"Not again... please not again," she sobbed. She pulled up her sleeve and gracefully traced over the new and old cuts over her pale wrist. She burried her face deeper into her bear and cried harder.....

It's not rebellion when you're selling out to an out of fashion salesman Our promising lives, are full of empty promises. Temptation's falling and calling you home again I'm sorry, if we've let you down

"why? why do I keep doing this?? I don't want to any more... i want to stop...." She looked up and wiped the tears off her face.... She glance up at her bedroom ceiling not seeing the deep darkness that filled the room, but a small line of light. "what?" she squinted her eyes to get a better look. There appeared to be letters in the line of light... "Cire?" She blinked and the light was gone, a bigger light appeared....

Won't you believe in this lie with us all?
GET ON YOUR KNEES. HAVE FAITH
But now my body's on the floor and I am calling, I'm calling out to you…can you hear me now??
Now my body's on the floor and I am crawling, I'm crawling out to you…can you hear me now???


"what's wrong raven?" a voice from a shadow said. the shadow came closer and closer and formed a boy who walked in to her small room. "I'm here. I'm here. Don't worry.." he said. "Oh Cire, I'm so scared." She sobbed harder as she ran, arms stretched out, towards him. "It's okay." he reassured, streching out his arms and giving her a opening. She closed her arms around him, but he wasn't there. She feel to her knees, only able to hug herself. "Cire!" she yelled. "Cire!" She held her self tightly, now fallen and layig on the floor. "Come back". she cried, "please come back."

Now my body's on the floor and I am calling, I'm calling out to you… CAN YOU HEAR ME NOW
~~
Really tempted to actually submit this....
Anywho, the song ish Hear Me Now by Framing Hanley <3

On to other news....

SIGN THIS PETITION!!!!!!!!
(located at )

The Orphan Bill is so *censored*

gosh.

random question: Why don't they have an emo smiley for your mood?? THEY SHOULD! *feels emo*

]]> ~BloodyRaven23 http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/17755549/ http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/17755549/ Tue, 08 Apr 2008 21:04:16 PDT All the time
Surely you can take some comfort
Knowing that you're mine
Just hold me tight, lay by my side
and let me be the one who calls you
Baby all the time

I found my place in the world
Could stare at your face for the rest of
my days
Now I can breathe, turn my insides out
and Smother me
Warm and alive I'm all over you
would you smother me?

Let me be the one who never leaves
You all alone
I hold my breath and lose the feeling
That I'm on my own
Hold me too tight stay by my side
and let me be the one who calls you
Baby all the time

I found my place in the world
Could stare at your face for the rest of
my days
Now I can breathe, turn my insides out
and Smother me
Warm and alive I'm all over you
would you smother me?

When I'm alone time goes so slow
I need you here with me
and how my mistakes have made
Your heart break
Still I need you here with me
Baby I'm here

Now I can breathe, turn my insides out
and Smother me
Warm and alive I'm all over you
would you smother me?

Now I can breathe, turn my insides out
and Smother me
Warm and alive I'm all over you
would you smother me?

Let me be the one who calls you baby
All the time

Let me be the one who calls you baby
All the time

Let me be the one who calls you baby
All the time

Let me be the one who calls you baby
The one who calls you baby
------

I'mm way tooo in love~ <333

it's just....

gosh

**The song is by The Used

It's amazin!!!!!!!!!! just liek him! ^//^ <333

]]> ~BloodyRaven23 http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/17703433/ http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/17703433/ Sat, 05 Apr 2008 17:54:40 PDT
~Inspired by "Dark Angel, and His Angel"

written by:



yea.........
its about my love....... <333

-------------------
yea..........

i kinda got caught tagging by some stupid lady whop called the cops!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

w.e.

i took the blame!

AND I WOULD DO IT A MILLION TIMES MORE!!!
~for yous only

i still can't believe im in the sysytem!!!!!!!

stupid donut addicts!!!!!!

hey at least i didn't go to jail like i could of.........

I'M FINE! I LIVE IN A HELL WHOLE AND BEEN DOING RETARTED STUFFS, BUT I'M OKAY!

I'm in love!!!!!!!!!!!!!

xXDark AngelXx {Loves HER emo}
xXDark RazorXx {Emo loves my dark angel}

yeah. me and him are gay like that!
back off!

]]> ~BloodyRaven23 http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/17657728/ http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/17657728/ Wed, 02 Apr 2008 19:37:10 PDT how I just love the sight of you...

I get just like a kid on christmas when you apper,

The way your pure red color looks against my pale white skin...

Oh how a peaceful mind just comes.

Oh sweet blood of mine,

How I just love the way you taste...
I'll no longer have to hide as if you're a disgrace...

Oh sweet blood of mine,

How I will soon let you go.

You'll peak out for the list time as I finally decide to go.

But just hear this,
you've done your job well...

but there is nothing I can do
to save me from this hell.

So at last,

your pure red will trickle down my pure white
and I can finally be at peace for my last night......

------

i can't fucking stop crying...

I read my journals and i sensed my fear of dying. but i was an idiot for being afraid. It'll be the best thing to ever happen to me.why won't i just go away?

]]> ~BloodyRaven23 http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/17615094/ http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/17615094/ Mon, 31 Mar 2008 22:19:34 PDT Crawling In The Dark

I will dedicate
And sacrifice my everything for just a second's worth
Of how my story's ending
And I wish I could know if the directions that I take
And all the choices that I make won't end up all for nothing
Show me what it's for
Make me understand it
I've been crawling in the dark looking for the answer
Is there something more than what i've been handed?
I've been crawling in the dark looking for the answer
Help me carry on
Assure me it's ok to use my heart and not my eyes
To navigate the darkness
Will the ending be ever coming suddenly?
Will I ever get to see the ending to my story?
Show me what it's for
Make me understand it
I've been crawling in the dark looking for the answer
Is there something more than what i've been handed?
I've been crawling in the dark looking for the answer
So when and how will I know?
How much further do I have to go?
How much longer until I finally know?
Because I'm looking and I just can't see what's in front of me
In front of me
Show me what it's for
Make me understand it
I've been crawling in the dark looking for the answer
Is there something more than what i've been handed?
I've been crawling in the dark looking for the answer

Always

I hear a voice say- 'Don't be so blind.'
It's telling me all these things that you would probably hide.
Am I your one and only desire?
Am I the reason you breathe?
Or am I the reason you cry?

Always (7X)
I just can't live without you.

I love you, I hate you, I can't get around you.
I breathe you, I taste you, I can't live without you.
I just can't take anymore of this life of solitude
I guess that I'm out the door and that I'm done with you.
(I pick myself off the floor and now I'm done with you)

I feel like you don't
Want me around
Guess I'll pack all my things
I guess I'll see you around.
It's all been bottled up until now.
And as I walk out your door
All I can hear is the sound of…
Always (7X)

I wrap my head around your heart.
Why would you tear my world apart.

I see the blood all over your hands
Does it make you feel more like a man?
Was it all just part of your plan?
The pistol shaking in my hands
And all I hear is the sound

I love you, I hate you, I can't get around you.
I breathe you, I taste you, I can't live without you.
I just can't take anymore of this life of solitude
I guess that I'm out the door and that I'm done with you.
(I pick myself off the floor and now I'm done with you)
------------
Here person!!!!! The damn journal you wanted!!!!!
These two songs can express my weekend/week so far. Along with my one devintation, Boy took...blah

Although, the comments in that deviantation are true about how i am feeling no *explains* All the alarms are going off and the red flags are waving, but I don't seem to be able to pull away. I know that he's wrong, he's just feeding lies to me, but i can't look past the big, bloody, gushy thing in his hand. My heart. yes he has it. He has it like no other has before. He's sooo different! and I want so despertaly for it to work out, but.........
is it just lies?????? HOW WOULD I EVER KNOW?!?!
My head is saying yes, but my soul is screaming no.
damn it! I really am crawling in the dark at this point.
(plz. will you hack in my myspace, change pw so i won't be able to talk to him!?)

~*School side of things*~

IT SUCKS ASS!!!!!!! NO WAY IN HELL DO I WANT TO BE APART OF THAT IDIOTIC, STUCKUP, SNOBBY PLACE!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I want to fuckin burn that place down!!!!!! its a peice of shit!!!!!!!!!

Good/Bad thing.......

I got into Exeter!!! YAYS! *dances* I get to take the fallowing classes: Media and Society, Drawing, and Discovering poetry. ROCK ON! xP

sucky part so far....... I have to be there (in New Hamsphire) by july 2!!!! I get out in June people! No summer break for me!!!!!!!!!! I'm going to be seperated from 2 amazing people this summer!
I don't even know if they have internet for me!!!!!! *spazes out*

But to be far away from home will be more than amazing!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! GOSH! I'M EXCITED!!!!

But I'm so confused about everything so far! @_@
I hate it............

(srry if this all doesn't make sense. gosh, my life makes as much senses as this journal)

]]> ~BloodyRaven23 http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/17499554/ http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/17499554/ Mon, 24 Mar 2008 19:59:11 PDT Say what you want, I'll believe it
No, you don't really have to mean it
I never had a chance, always was a sucker for a part time lover's romance

Say what you want, I'll believe it
No, you don't really have to mean it
I never had a chance, always was a sucker for a part time lover's romance

Take time if you need it
Rewind and repeat it
Well tears fall, better believe it
Every day feels like forever (2x)

Say what you want, I'll believe it
No, you don't really have to mean it
I never had a chance, always was a sucker for a part time lover's romance

Yeah, take what you want, I don't need it
I'll play the giver if you'll receive it
I never had a chance, always was a sucker for a part time lover's romance

Every day is bitter sweet sweet bitter
I've got the time if you've got time to remember
But it's clear that you don't
If you did, then you'd show it
If you feel it, you might know it

Every day is bitter sweet sweet bitter
Disappoint me, yeah you sure do deliver
You always seem just like an orphan on Christmas
I'll take what I can get, but it's not on my wish list

(wasn't ever on my wish list)

Take time if you need it
Rewind and repeat it
Well tears fall, better believe it
Every day feels like forever (2x)

Every day feels like forever

Take time if you need it
Rewind and repeat it

Take time if you need it

----------------

Scary thing is, I took one of those chain thingys and it said that this is my life song!

IT WAS FOOKIN RIGHT!!!!!!!!!!! >
]]> ~BloodyRaven23 http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/17457523/ http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/17457523/ Sat, 22 Mar 2008 11:41:09 PDT stupid.
stupid.
stupid.
stupid.
stupid.
stupid.


.......me.............

]]> ~BloodyRaven23 http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/17344244/ http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/17344244/ Sat, 15 Mar 2008 09:18:57 PDT ANTHEM:

I got a girlfriend
Only she don't know it yet
I got a six string best friend
Who sleeps with a broken neck
I want to make my mark
change the world, with this flow
But, all this doubt in my head
It won't let me go

Can't you see I want to lock my door and shut out all the world surrounding me
Safe from the problems and the pressures caused by insecurities

Get up! Get up!
Let the good times roll!
Get up! Get up!
Take my heart and my soul!
Get up! Get up!
Let the good times roll
On and on and on..

Feel like everybody else just needs to see through different eyes
From the outside looking in we shout the anthem of our lives
Come on and let me go
and just like everybody else
I feel the pain each time I try
But I'll fight the bitter end
to shout the anthem
the anthem of our lives

I got a heartache
She's my insecurity
I got all these on my tongue but they escape me
I want to breakout, Carpe Diem,
I know, but all this doubt in my head It won't let me go

Can't you see I want to find my own direction on this busy one-way street
Where all the influential people never bother helping me

Get up Get up!
Let the good times roll
Get up Get up!
Take my heart and my soul!
Get up! Get up!
Let the good times roll
One and on and on..

Feel like everybody else just needs to see through different eyes
From the outside looking in we shout the anthem of our lives
Come on and let me go
and just like everybody else
I feel the pain each time I try
But I'll fight the bitter end
to shout the anthem
the anthem of our lives

This is the Anthem
Out to all the misfits
If you feel you don't belong
If you don't give a shit
About authority
About majority
About conformity
Shout it out
Let us go! [x7]

Everybody else just needs to see through different eyes
From the outside looking in
we shout the anthem of our lives
Just like everybody else
I feel the pain each time I try
But I'll fight the bitter end
to shout the anthem
the anthem of our lives

Feel like everybody else just needs to see through different eyes
From the outside looking in
We shout the anthem of our lives
Just like everybody else
I feel the pain each time I try
But I'll fight the bitter end
to shout the anthem
the anthem of our lives

~If you haven't started reading the story yet. please do! If not for yourself, for me!!!!!! Its a good story so far and I I got read ahead and its good!!!

Well, only if your into that teen drama sorta thing!!!!!

So read it, comment it, fav it, WATCH THE DEVIANT!, or tell them how they can improve on some thing!
(like Tsuname needs to stop being a perv, or Saku shouldn't/should forgive Kairi, or Kairi needs a hotter guy to be with! xP)

LET THEM FEEL SOME DA LOVE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
they really could use it!

Plus, the song ATHEM is amazing!!!!

Carpe Diem people!

]]> ~BloodyRaven23 http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/17146166/ http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/17146166/ Sun, 02 Mar 2008 09:40:49 PST
Simple Plan liek totally sucks!!!!!

Along with the other PCP people that ruined my day!!!

So an hour before the big simple plan concert, we find out its been CANCELED!

AND THEY JUST SENT THE EMAIL THAT DAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

WE WERE ALREADY IN THE CAR TO GO TO!!!!!!!!

>
Then me and my friends decided to go to the movies.
I SAW PPL FROM SCHOOL THERE!!! >
I hate people from school....... -_-

Upside.........

99.9% chance of going to the tast of chaos.....
Penelope was a great movie............
and I got alot better in dance dance revolution! ^_^
and I'm still going to AKIC concert................

]]> ~BloodyRaven23 http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/17095830/ http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/17095830/ Wed, 27 Feb 2008 20:44:25 PST
YAY!!


AND IM GOING TO SIMPLE PLAN IN CONCERT!!!!
YAY! MOSH TIME!!!!


And now I really like 2 dudes!!!! >
GUY PROBLEMS!!!! >

RANDOM RAMPAGE!!!

DUCK! LLAMA!!

]]> ~BloodyRaven23 http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/16964698/ http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/16964698/ Tue, 19 Feb 2008 15:51:39 PST I can taste the winter
I would shut up if I thought that it mattered
That's what it feels like
When you're stitched into the skin
I feel stuck
And no one thinks
Something's missing?

No one cares
No one listens
Screaming words that you fake hearing
No one cares
No one listens anymore

My eyes burn
As I bury how I'm feeling
Close my eyes
It's my life that I've been stealing
If it's all right why do I feel a sense of longing?
I had it all and yet I thought that something's missing
Something's missing

No one cares
No one listens
Screaming words that you fake hearing
No one cares
No one listens anymore

So paranoid
I've been hiding from the sun
I'm tired of being afraid
of everything and everyone
Oh so tired...

Blow

So fucking
Blow those words out the back of your head
I've heard it all and I’m done with that shit
You tell me lies and
You give what you get
So blow those fucking words out the back of your head

Oh my god
Did you just hear?
Lies are coming back in style
Oh my god
They seem so real that they bind you
And confine you
So shut your mouth we've heard it all
Hypocrites and critics all
Can fuck off we do this for our souls oh our souls

What they say won’t make us go away

[Chorus]

We’re not sorry and we won’t conform
It’s not a choice but something inborn
If we fail following our hearts can you blame us. no no no

A square peg in a black hole
We don’t fit in, that’s the way it goes
You shouldn’t act like you’re better than us cause you're not no you're not
No no no

What they say won’t make us go away

[Chorus x2]

Tell yourself your not alone at all
(Looking out your window. Know you’re all alone)[x2]

What they say won’t make us go away

Perfect

Hey dad look at me
Think back and talk to me
Did I grow up according to plan?
And do you think I'm wasting my time doing things I wanna do?
But it hurts when you disapprove all along

And now I try hard to make it
I just want to make you proud
I'm never gonna be good enough for you
I can't pretend that
I'm alright
And you can't change me

'Cuz we lost it all
Nothing lasts forever
I'm sorry
I can't be perfect
Now it's just too late and
We can't go back
I'm sorry
I can't be perfect

I try not to think
About the pain I feel inside
Did you know you used to be my hero?
All the days you spend with me
Now seem so far away
And it feels like you don't care anymore

And now I try hard to make it
I just want to make you proud
I'm never gonna be good enough for you
I can't stand another fight
And nothing's alright

'Cuz we lost it all
Nothing lasts forever
I'm sorry
I can't be perfect
Now it's just too late and
We can't go back
I'm sorry
I can't be perfect

Nothing's gonna change the things that you said
Nothing's gonna make this right again
Please don't turn your back
I can't believe it's hard
Just to talk to you
But you don't understand

'Cuz we lost it all
Nothing lasts forever
I'm sorry
I can't be perfect
Now it's just too late and
We can't go back
I'm sorry
I can't be perfect

'Cuz we lost it all
Nothing lasts forever
I'm sorry
I can't be perfect
Now it's just too late and
We can't go back
I'm sorry
I can't be perfect

]]> ~BloodyRaven23 http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/16866462/ http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/16866462/ Wed, 13 Feb 2008 15:41:23 PST
Ohh yea!

So exspect some new devaintations soon!!!!

(well after my lab report and typed papers)

Then I'm all about submitting deviantations!!!!!

You can't hold me down!!!!!!

]]> ~BloodyRaven23 http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/16603270/ http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/16603270/ Sun, 27 Jan 2008 19:41:15 PST
I miss you all! SO MUCH!!!!!!!!!
I can't believe I've gone this long without DA! *tears*

I'm so sorry if I don't comment people or thank you all for either adding me to their friends list or for favoriting my work! I'm a very poor person! I don't have any internet acess at all! : (
God sakes, i don't even have a phone!!!!!!

I CANT WAIT FOR TAXES TO BE DONE! Thanks to the recession, it's $300 for mommy and daddy (each) and $600 for each child their moght be happiness in that somewhere.

SO I MISS YOU ALL AND FORGIVE ME!!!!!

I'LL BE BACK! Maybe.
Hopefully.
ahh man!
I don't want to leave!
(

]]> ~BloodyRaven23 http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/13893591/ http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/13893591/ Thu, 26 Jul 2007 22:27:26 PDT Laughter fills the the room as they all were gather around the televison. Everyone smiling and happy. Then it all changed. THey began aruing loud. One of the parents left to the room, slamming the doors behind him as hard as possible. The other parent fallowed, screaming and slaming the doors just as hard. There was really no need to close the doors because the children could still here them arguing and the things here all the things they threw around crash. The screaming started to become louder; it was coming closer. One of the parents came back to the room where it all started, where the children were at. The parent didn't even look at them, just opened up another door and left.

~3 1/2 hours later~

The parent finally came back. The children all rose from their seats; same ones they were in when the parent left. Once again, the parent didn't even to glance in their direction. (the other parental was stiil by themself behind another door. Not once did they come out.) She just left the room. 15 minutes later the parent came back and sat down, joing the children watching t.v.

"See, the only great reason to watch Ace of Cakes is because they are funny."

One of the children let out.

"Well you got to admit that scrabble cake was good."

The other child added.

"Yea."

-------------------

YES! FUCKIN PRETEND NOTHIN HAPPEN AT ALL! PRETEND THAT THE PARENTS DIDNT HAVE A HUGE ARGUMENT AT ALL! PRETEND THAT ONE OF THEM DIDNT LEAVE FOR OVER 3 HOURS AND THE OTHER ONE DIDNT LOCK THEMSELVES IN THEIR ROOM!!!!!!!
JUST ALL FUCKIN PRETEND IT DIDNT HAPPEN! NOTHIN AT ALL!

---------------------------

They only acted as if nothin happen because they are just used to it and it doesn't affect them anymore. They are at the point where if their parents were arguing and actually came to them to say "its over pick who your going to stay wit." the children would flinch,shed a tear, or even bother to move. Why? Because they benn through it all before. And they know its all bull shit.

]]> ~BloodyRaven23 http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/13866204/ http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/13866204/ Tue, 24 Jul 2007 21:09:55 PDT
Lets start with my writing.

I haven't been inspired at all!

The only thing I have been working alittle on is my fic with my best friends. But thats not going great cause my friend/ co-writer is out of town with all of our stuffies and shes out of contact AND I MADE IT ALL THE WAY TO CHAPTER 5!!!!!!! > We only got to post our 1st chapter Impacto.

Which could be found here:

~Trio-Reaper-Inc

So thats all sad right there! Really sad!

And there's more!!! >
I'm under house arrest!!!!! Being force to do summer homework!!! and the only way I can get a break from doing that is bye doing chores!!!!

I'm not allowed to use the phone, the comp, NO FOOKIN MUSIC!!!!! <<----NOT RIGHT! I almost died because I went a WHOLE HOUR WITHOUT MUSIC! *begins to cry* Its so wrong! I CANT SURVIVE WITHOUT MUSIC!!!! NOT POSSIBLE!

And the homework is kinds hard too! and requires alot of writing! I only did the front side of the first page and it took me 4 pages! back and front!!!!

-_- I hate my school! >
Well Im glad that I got to sneak on the comp right now and is now allowed to listen to as much music as possible! But no one is online to talk to *cries*

Well this is the little bareable stuffs that I'm dealing with! Im super bored thats why im writing! AND NO ONE IS ONLINE!! >

Oh wells!!!!!! Here's a good song that I really like!

Senses Fail - NJ Falls Into The Atlantic

And it's 4am and we will stalk again
The princess and her bitter queen.
On the 4th day of July
Deep in summers eye,
Naked like the truth should always be.

So speak your knives.
(Don't follow, with your foot)
All this pain here,
(All comes from your dry lung)
I won't listen
(Your rhetoric is fleeting)
My lies are fixed with glue.

Coming straight from off the water
Sunburned face and drunken father
Crying as she's carving in her flesh.

And it's 4am and we will stalk again
The princess and her bitter queen.
On the 4th day of July
Deep in summers eye,
Naked like the truth should always be.

This false art
(Of palm trees and trash heaps)
This burning bed
(Where my ghost will now sleep)

Watching romance from a far seat
Bleeding from the glass on my feet
Learning that I love the smell of flesh.

And it's 4am and we will stalk again
The princess and her bitter queen.
On the 4th day of July
Deep in summers eye,
Naked like the truth should always be.

An angel on his two knees
Arms stretched towards the red sea
Of violence and a sultry tongue
The scenic view of carnage
'Caused by the sword in his hands
The beauty resonates in birth.

It's plain to see the wind beneath the trees.
Flowing free, the summer breeze is sweet.
I lay in space choked by my own air.
I love the taste of your blackened lips.

And it's 4am and we will stalk again
The princess and her bitter queen.
On the 4th day of July
Deep in summers eye,
Naked like the truth should always be.

]]> ~BloodyRaven23 http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/13797542/ http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/13797542/ Thu, 19 Jul 2007 16:20:57 PDT


Dear watchers, I am pleased to annouce a group account, ~Trio-Reaper-Inc is up and running! We have already submitted a chapter of our group story, Anthem of Our Lives. We'd like you to visit our page, comment and watch . It's worth the visit. Well, that is all.

Have a swell day ~Trio-Reaper-Inc
-
The people responsible for this story are the following:








Trio Reaper inc is a copyrighted trademark of The Reaper Trio and shall not be reproduced in any other way or form unless given permission to by any of the three reapers working at the Corperation

]]> ~BloodyRaven23 http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/13746033/ http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/13746033/ Sun, 15 Jul 2007 15:36:15 PDT My poems:

You Don't Know
You see tears running down my eyes
And you wonder why.
Why is she crying?
Why does she even care?
Truth is,
I, myself don't know.
I don't know why I cry for you.
I don't know why I care.
I just do.
And I hate it more than anything in the world.
I don't want to feel the way I do.
Why do you think I pushed myself away from you?
Did you ever stop to wonder why?
Why I do certain things when it comes to you?
No, you don't.
Your to busy caring about your self.
And no one else.
Cuz if you actually stopped and look around,
You would understand alot more things.
Like why things the way they are,
Why people act a certain way,
And even why I feel the way I do about you.

Unwanted Love
I dont want this to be.
Why can't you see?
My feelings aren't suppose to be use as a game,
To make me go insane.
But something to reconize,
And something to realize.
I dont want to feel what I feel,
But I do, and its not easy to deal.
Cuz Is eating inside me.
Making it harder to breathe.
Making it harder to think.
When will this all sink?
Yeah I do like you,
But its not like I want to.
So how many times does it have to be said?
when it comes to liking you, I rather be dead.

I Honestly Love You
I catch myself day dreaming about you & me.
And what would it will be like if were to be.
But I cant feel this way at all.
Cuz there are are so many people that are involve.
Me liking you is wrong.
But I been feeling this way for so long.
I wanted us to be together.
Forever.

But your her man.
And this I cant stand.
You dont belong with each other.
And all you do is lie to one another.
But there is nothing I can say or do,
That will convince you.

So many people will get in my way.
If it ever comes to a day,
That I decide to tell.
Everybody will be left feeling unwell.
They will all hate me.
But as long as you can see,
That I honestly love you,
And its not a lie but true.
I think it'll all be fine.
And I'll be alright.
As long you'll stay in my life.

Lock Up My Heart

I crept up at me unexpected.
I couldn't beleive it.
I would have never thought of it.
Just out of nowhere it came.
It came and showed it self.
Why now?
Why did it have to be?

Why did I have to start to get feelings for you?

I dont want it to be true.
I dont want to feel what I do.
But I cant help it.
I wish I can just lock up my heart.
So this way I can never be this vunerable.
But I can't.
And I am.

And just as I discovered my feelings for you,
You discovered your feelings for her.
And lucky for you,
You get to have her.
And unlucky for me,
I can never have you.

As easy as I feel for you,
Just as easy you hurt me.
But I knew the circumstances.
And knew that its one thing that cant happen.
It just proves that I need to lock up my heart.
So I cant easly fall for someone
And so I won't be so vunerable.

]]> ~BloodyRaven23 http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/13714293/ http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/13714293/ Thu, 12 Jul 2007 22:59:10 PDT Come take a walk with me.
Let's pretend we're just two people and
You're not better than me.
I'd like to ask you some questions if we can speak honestly.

What do you feel when you see all the homeless on the street?
Who do you pray for at night before you go to sleep?
What do you feel when you look in the mirror?
Are you proud?

How do you sleep while the rest of us cry?
How do you dream when a mother has no chance to say goodbye?
How do you walk with your head held high?
Can you even look me in the eye
And tell me why?

Dear Mr. President,
Were you a lonely boy?
Are you a lonely boy?
Are you a lonely boy?
How can you say
No child is left behind?
We're not dumb and we're not blind.
They're all sitting in your cells
While you pave the road to hell.

What kind of father would take his own daughter's rights away?
And what kind of father might hate his own daughter if she were gay?
I can only imagine what the first lady has to say
You've come a long way from whiskey and cocaine.

How do you sleep while the rest of us cry?
How do you dream when a mother has no chance to say goodbye?
How do you walk with your head held high?
Can you even look me in the eye?

Let me tell you 'bout hard work
Minimum wage with a baby on the way
Let me tell you 'bout hard work
Rebuilding your house after the bombs took them away
Let me tell you 'bout hard work
Building a bed out of a cardboard box
Let me tell you 'bout hard work
Hard work
Hard work
You don't know nothing 'bout hard work
Hard work
Hard work
Oh

How do you sleep at night?
How do you walk with your head held high?
Dear Mr. President,
You'd never take a walk with me.
Would you?

DAMN BUSH! Its so funny that Pink's New video came out tha day after I did my tagged! Yup, you bet it is. This song is about Bush. And Its beautiful!

I love it and I love pink!

***But hating everyone else!

]]> ~BloodyRaven23 http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/13695062/ http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/13695062/ Wed, 11 Jul 2007 11:52:56 PDT
Mine:
1) When I get nervous or pissed off I keep pulling the ruberband on my wrist. (letting it snap back)
2) When I get a crush I become silent as hell! (yes this is possible for me)
3) I let out a fan girl screams when I watch anime with Hot guys.
4) If I break a nail or chip my nail polish, I rip off my other nails and chip off my nailpolish
5) I pace around the house when I'm bored.
6) I can not go an hour without listening to Paramore/fly leaf/ Boys like Girls/ Fall out boy.

Now for the added questions:

1- Find the book nearest to you, go to page 18, find line 4:
No books near me ^_^
2- Stretch out your left arm as far as you can:
My sister's mini t.v

3- Last thing you watched on TV?:
Sirius radio. I really dont watch tv shows. Just listen to music.

4- Without looking, what time is it?:
1:38

5- Now, what is the actual time?:
1:40

6- Without the computer, what do you hear?:
My dad and sister play Mortal combat and My mom's TV. (spanish show)

7- When did you last step outside?:
Yesterday!

8- Before you took this survey, what did you look at?:
The music video for Emergency by Paramore

9- What are you wearing?:
Herd Rock Cafe t-shirt, jeans and flip flops( I hate them >
10- Did you dream last night?:
Sadly.
11- When did you last laugh?
This morning

12- What is on the walls in the room you are in?
Clowns(freaky?)

13- See anything weird lately?:
Not today.

14- What do you think of this quiz?:
I think its alot of things! Anod most importantly, HOW THE FUCK DO I GET TAGGED TWICE!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!
15- What is the last film you saw?:
Legally Blonde ^_^

16- If you became a multi-millionaire overnight, what would you buy?:
My own place away from here. By cool as shit for it too.
17- Tell me something I don't know about you:
I have a crush on the worst guy ever! Soo not right

18- If you could do one thing about the world without guilt or politics what would you do?:
NOTHIN!

19- Do you like to dance?:
Yes. But Im in the closet about that

20- George Bush:
Any I say will be use against me in the court of law.

21- Imagine your first child is a girl, what is her name?:
Jade, andrea

22- Imagine you first child is a boy, what is his name?:
Jake Josh Jacob
23- Would you consider living abroad?:
WTF?

24- What do you want God to say to you when you reach heaven?:
Never going to see him.

25. Tag six people who must do this in their journal:
NEVER THIS IS STUPID AND I'M NOT GOING TO SPREAD IT!

]]> ~BloodyRaven23 http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/13651665/ http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/13651665/ Sat, 07 Jul 2007 21:10:45 PDT
Ick! Now I'm regreting submitting it! > Im such a freak! hehehehe

lalalalalalalalalalalalala

Ummmm...what else??

OHH!
HAPPY 7/7/07! Lucky? I dunno. Not really sure bout it.

And IM A SNARIC! LMAO! yup. I am .

---

Like anime? (mainly for girls)

Check out an anime call Fruits Basket. Yes, looking at the title you will think that the anime is crap but it isnt! I really like it! its so kickass!

I <3 YUKI!!!!!!!!!!!!! *SQUEAK!*
He's the best! ^_^

Thats all folks!

<(^_^< ) (>^_^)>


^(^_^)^ raise the roof!

]]> ~BloodyRaven23 http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/13639812/ http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/13639812/ Fri, 06 Jul 2007 21:30:48 PDT
Would you go to war for me, baby
Would you cry for the weak
And die for the peace of men
Oh how can we know
You and I both know
So let's make this boatload of excuses burn and sing

One day it all comes down to this
You can sink or swim
You can handle this
One day it all comes down
One day we all go down

I'll take my heart back
And set the people free
I'll leave the dead to die
And take what's coming with me

Step back for all the world to see
Your life means all the world to me
I'll take your pain and suffering
I'm such a sucker sometimes
Sometimes we don't know
So plug up those bullet holes
Oh you feel so close, don't let go until I say

One day we'll drink to this and say
Remember when we died
We went out in flames

I'll take my heart back
And set the people free
And take what's coming with me

Step back for all the world to see
Your life means all the world to me
I'll take your pain and suffering
I'm such a sucker sometimes
Sometimes we don't know
So plug up those bullet holes
Oh you feel so close, don't let go until I say

One day we'll drink to this and say
Remember when we died
We went out in flames

I'll take my heart back
And set the people free
There will be blood in the streets

]]> ~BloodyRaven23 http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/13598766/ http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/13598766/ Tue, 03 Jul 2007 21:40:36 PDT "Animals"

I, I'm driving black on black
Just got my license back
I got this feeling in my veins this train is coming off the track
I'll ask polite if the devil needs a ride
Because the angel on my right ain't hanging out with me tonight
I'm driving past your house while you were sneaking out
I got the car door opened up so you can jump in on the run
Your mom don't know that you were missing
She'd be pissed if she could see the parts of you that I've been kissing
Screamin'

[CHORUS]
No, we're never gonna quit
Ain't nothing wrong with it
Just acting like we're animals
No, no matter where we go
'Cause everybody knows
We're just a couple of animals

So come on baby, get in
Get in, just get in
Check out the trouble we're in

You're beside me on the seat
Got your hand between my knees
And you control how fast we go by just how hard you wanna squeeze
It's hard to steer when you're breathing in my ear
But I got both hands on the wheel while you got both hands on my gears
By now, no doubt that we were heading south
I guess nobody ever taught her not to speak with a full mouth

'Cause this was it, like flicking on a switch
It felt so good I almost drove into the ditch
I'm screamin'

[CHORUS]

So come on baby, get in
Get in, just get in
Look at the trouble we're in

We were parked out by the tracks
We're sitting in the back
And we just started getting busy
When she whispered "what was that?"
The wind, I think 'cause no one else knows where we are
And that was when she started screamin'
"That's my dad outside the car!"
Oh please, the keys, they're not in the ignition
Must have wound up on the floor while
we were switching our positions
I guess they knew that she was missing
As I tried to tell her dad it was her mouth that I was kissing
Screamin'

[CHORUS]

So come on baby, get in
We're just a couple of animals
Get in, just get in
Ain't nothing wrong with it
Check out the trouble we're in
Get in, just get in
~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`

Follow You Home- (Fav. song on CD)
Well you can dig me up a grave
And try and stick me in the ground
Well you can tie me to the bed
And try and beat me half to death
But you can never keep me down
Well you can stick me in a hole
And you can pray all day for rain
You can shoot me in the leg
Just to try to make me beg
And you can leave me there for days

[CHORUS]
And I'll stay alive
Just to follow you home
And I will survive
'Cause you're my Mississippi Princess
You're my California Queen
Like the Duchess of Detroit
And every city in between
You can slap me in the face
You can scream profanity
Leave me here to die alone but
I'll still follow you home
I'll still follow you home

You can make a couple calls
And tell your brothers I'm in town
Put a bounty on my head

And tell my parents that I'm dead
And hope to hell I'm never found
You can steal me the keys
To your daddy's Cadillac
You can tamper with the brakes
Call it a mistake
And pray I'm never coming back

[CHORUS]

You can dig me up a grave
And try and stick me in the ground
You can tie me to the bed
And try and beat me half to death
But you can never keep me down

And I will survive
'Cause you're my Mississippi Princess
You're my California Queen
Like the Duchess of Detroit
And every city in between
You can slap me in the face
You can scream profanity
Leave me here to die alone but
I'll still follow you home
I'll still follow you home


Got to love Nikelback! ^_^ ]]> ~BloodyRaven23 http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/13568904/ http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/13568904/ Sun, 01 Jul 2007 19:59:28 PDT
Penny are mostly useless. People don't care shit about it cuz its not worth much. They just toss it away.

Hes nothing. Hes something that just needs to be toss out of my life. Hes not worth much at all.

But pennies do make a big difference. They can stop you from getting alot/doing alot of things. And no matter what, they will always be there no matter what you try to do.

He makes a big difference. He prevents me from getting and doing alot of things. And no matter how hard I will try to cut him out of everything, hes still there.
~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`

Everything is going okay and I'm fine.
But for some reason I'm still hurting.
And I don't know whats the source of this pain
And like always, I dont know how to make it go away. ]]> ~BloodyRaven23 http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/13514305/ http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/13514305/ Wed, 27 Jun 2007 15:55:56 PDT (Not even your lamest try)

LALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALA!

SO HAPPY! Listening to very hyper music! YAY PARAMORE!!!

Lyric: Second chances they don't ever matter, people never change
Once a whore, you're nothing more, I'm sorry that'll never change.

Thats my favorite part from Misery Buisness!

LALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALA LA

SO HAPPY!!!!!!!!!!!
I WUV YOU ALL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

]]> ~BloodyRaven23 http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/13491288/ http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/13491288/ Mon, 25 Jun 2007 21:49:07 PDT I left the front room to go to my room and watch TV, and maybe fall asleep. My mom came rushing to her room where my father was at. (close to my room)
My mom starts to talk. "A girl from Ames got shot by Funston." This one sentece cause me to jump high, lose my breath, and panic all at once. Ames is my school. ( well old. just graduated.) And Funston is the school near my old house. I know alot of girls around there. Alot of girls I cared deeply about. I could go 10 blocks around that school and name at least one person from each block.
As soon as my mom said that sentence she added, "Did you hear me over there." I ran out of my room. And headed towards the front room where they were watching the news. I actually didn't believe my mother when she said it. I had to see for myself. I had my sister replay the news report. And there I saw behind the news reporter was the school. She was talkin but only certain things came to my attention. "A young girl got shot earlier today. She only lives somewhere around a block from here. The young girl attended Ames Middle Schhol." Thats the only thing I can remember. I just started to shake. The reporter was still giving the report. But I over powered the TV with my questions. I wanted to know who it was soo bad. But they didn't say. And I just kept thinking that it was someone i knew. I ran towards my computer, turning it on, hoping that people were online and they could give me information. I kept shaking, I was so scared and freaked out. Finally my Com. loaded up and there was some one online. Before my Instant Messenger could finish loading I was already clicking like mad.
One of my friends was online and I knew she would know something about it and if not she could call another friend to find out. Luckily she was also on the one with that one friend I had an mind that would know everything. She was able to tell me the girls name. But that just killed me more. I knew a girl with the same name. So I asked for spacific info. And it turns out that it wasn't the persone i knew. I was soo relived. But still scared and freaked out. I actually started to cry. It was just too scary. And just writing this is killing me. What if it was some one I knew? I was lucky it wasnt. And I'm glad to say from my last check the girl is in critical condition but alive.


God. It sounds soo short when I write it. But it all lasted to long. It was like time stoped but everything kept comin at me. I stayed online so I can talk to people and calm down. I hate being this scared. People are understanding and try there best to confort me. (Actually helped me to stop crying.) But then when I really didn't need it, the one person i really cant stand (god i cant stand him!) IM's me. Joking around. I read what he wrote. And it just brought back, and entensived, every scared, freaked out feeling I had. I just started to cry and shake. My sister got so freaked out she ran to me holding me. I know he didn't know but it always has to be him to make things worse. I just want.....I dont know what I want. But damn.....This is so hard and it doesnt go well with everything.

I'm going to spend my whole day with people I care about and I know care about me tommorow. AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU 3 FUCK IT UP FOR US 3! I don't want to deal with any of your bull shit at all. I just want to get over this and have a great time. I just want that one day. Dont kill it. And if you do, you better be prepared for whats going to happen. And you already know that I will have no hesentation, and beat the fuck out of you. Summer vaction has only been 2 weeks and its been hell.

]]> ~BloodyRaven23 http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/13477161/ http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/13477161/ Sun, 24 Jun 2007 20:37:34 PDT
Degrassi is an amazing teen novela that really goes there. (I finally saw the episode where JT died! soo sad...) NO JOKE!

Back to Paramore!

I'm not into chicks rockin it out. Its true. I don't like girl rockers. They just cant do it. But she can! YAY!

Hear some songs to cheack out if you are open minded to different kinds of music:

***MiseryBuisness *Conspircy ***Pressure *Never Let This Let Go
***Emergency *Here We Go Again

Songs on the left are the best songs ever and the ones on the right are other good songs but not as good as the ones on the left. ^_^

*Note to the trio,

~ Sadly the 3 people we were kinda hoping wont go are going. v_v Sorry no matter how much I dislike the peoples I cant be mean at the moment. To much Mean-ness going around here and I can't be mean to others. (For now.) But I cant promise anyone anything when I'm force to be near him! > AND WE R GOING NO MATTER WHAT! I need to!
But yea. Can't object so soory! We will still have crazy fun. (If nothin goes wrong)

Random: There is this weird song that I like called "Fallen Leaves" by Billy Talent. I dont like any other song from these peoples so far but this one is really good in a weird way. Try it if you please. Try all the songs!! ^_^ Only if you want. No one is forcing or expecting!

Also: I got saved! I got back my summer book I need to do my homework! YAY! That was a close one!

]]> ~BloodyRaven23 http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/13439354/ http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/13439354/ Thu, 21 Jun 2007 22:13:16 PDT Actually they do spead the kill to others. I will admit to that but sometimes its not like that.
Its just to hard.
Too hard.


Worse part bout everything is that with all the shit I go though I'm the one that feels guilty. I'm the one that regrets everything. I'm the one that wants to make things better. Even if its the simplest thing, like me not wanting to talk to someone. I end up feeling guilty and regreting and feeling like its all my fault things are wrong.

Its all too hard.
Too hard.

]]> ~BloodyRaven23 http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/13420287/ http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/13420287/ Wed, 20 Jun 2007 13:50:30 PDT The smell of your skin lingers on me now
Your probably on your flight back to your home town
I need some shelter of my own protection baby
To be with myself and center clarity
Peace, Serenity

I hope you know, I hope you know
That this has nothing to do with you
It's personal, Myself and I
We've got some straightenin' out to do
And I'm gonna miss you like a child misses their blanket
But I’ve got to get a move on with my life
Its time to be a big girl now
And big girls don't cry
Don't cry
Don't cry
Don't cry

The path that I'm walking
I must go alone
I must take the baby steps until I'm full grown, full grown
Fairy tales don't always have a happy ending, do they
And I foresee the dark ahead if I stay

I hope you know, I hope you know
That this has nothing to with you
It's personal, Myself and I
We've got some straightenin' out to do

And I'm gonna miss you like a child misses their blanket
But I've got to get a move on with my life
Its time to be a big girl now
And big girls don't cry

Like the little school mate in the school yard
We'll play jacks and uno cards
Ill be your best friend and you'll be mine
Valentine
Yes you can hold my hand if you want to
Cause I want to hold yours too
Well be playmates and lovers and share our secret worlds
But its time for me to go home
Its getting late, dark outside
I need to be with myself and center clarity
Peace, Serenity

I hope you know, I hope you know
That this has nothing to do with you
It's personal, Myself and I
We've got some straightenin' out to do
And I'm gonna miss you like a child misses their blanket
But I've got to get a move on with my life
Its time to be a big girl now
And big girls don't cry
Don't cry
Don't cry
Don't cry
La Da Da Da Da Da
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
I always needed time on my own
I never thought I'd need you there when I cried
And the days feel like years when I'm alone
And the bed where you lie
is made up on your side

When you walk away
I count the steps that you take
Do you see how much I need you right now?

When you're gone
The pieces of my heart are missing you
When you're gone
The face I came to know is missing too
When you're gone
All the words I need to hear to always get me through the day
And make it OK
I miss you

I've never felt this way before
Everything that I do
Reminds me of you
And the clothes you left
they lie on the floor
And they smell just like you
I love the things that you do

When you walk away
I count the steps that you take
[When Your Gone lyrics on [link]

Do you see how much I need you right now?

When you're gone
The pieces of my heart are missing you
When you're gone
The face I came to know is missing too
And when you're gone
The words I need to hear to always get me through the day
And make it OK
I miss you

We were made for each other
Out here forever
I know we were
Yeah Yeah

All I ever wanted was for you to know
Everything I do I give my heart and soul
I can hardly breathe I need to feel you here with me
Yeah

When you're gone
The pieces of my heart are missing you
When you're gone
The face I came to know is missing too
When you're gone
The words I need to hear will always get me through the day
And make it OK
I miss you
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Two very good songs that I LUV! Well two of the 300. But they are on top 3 for chicks! Very very good.

*Dont worry I'm surving here in hell! I find my ways of stayin alive.

]]> ~BloodyRaven23 http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/13358519/ http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/13358519/ Fri, 15 Jun 2007 16:09:22 PDT All I can say is that...Well I can't say much to any of yous because does it matter? No matter what we would say or do its just not.....Well its nothing.

I thought that the hanging out was bad but its nothing to compared to what is happening as of right now. (Even though it left me feeling a way I thought none of them could make me feel)Btw, if I was to be lucky and see any of you two. Well lets just say no huggin at all. my side cant take any pressure. Man. There doing the fuckin same old shit again. But they only do this shit when things get extreamly bad. My mom already began the packing and the yelling of, "Choose who you rather stay with. I'm sorry I just cant take living with your father anymore." I wish it would be all true. But like always they will continue arguing and some how my mom will start unpacking. But right now shes putting her bags by the door and is battling with my dad for the phone.
Why cant they just do it! It will make so many things better!!! I'm sick of having to deal with this bull shit. I'm sick of having to chose of one parent over another and for no reason!

Hint to things:
It was past 12am. Everyone is asleep, the night compleatly silent. She entered her room, going stright towards her DVD player. She put a cd on, making it play one song. Evil Angel. She went on top her bed to open her window all the way. She took a second to look out at the sinery. It was beautiful. The sky a midnight blue filled with tiny stars everywhere. A nice breeze, and compleate silence. It was serenity. She stood up on her bed and step on to the ledge, holding on to the sides. Her hair was blowing to the direction of the breeze. She took a deep breath, empting out her mind only to fill it back up with the music. She took a step foward, falling the two stories.

I COULDNT EVEN FIND A SMILEY THAT SHOWS HOW I FEEL!

You can not fully understand how tempting this is. But why will anyone put a second thought to it?? For real? Don't even try if you dont mean it cuz seriously, I've seen what it looks like when any of yous care. And the way you treat any of us is not even an inch of your caring.

]]> ~BloodyRaven23 http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/13319644/ http://BloodyRaven23.deviantart.com/journal/13319644/ Tue, 12 Jun 2007 17:19:48 PDT This day has really left me speech less. The day was breath taking,full of tears, and so much emotion. As it closed a small chapter in my life, it gave me a glimpse of the new one starting.
I'm not going to lie and say that we are all still going to be close and nothing is ever going to change. No one can prove that this would be true. Or even if it isnt. All we really can do is try and have as much hope and faith as possible.
This might not make much sense. In fact as I read over it i cant even fuuly understand it to its full meaning. But there is no other way for me to put it.

Well all I really have left to say is congrats to the class of '07 I love you all! And good luck with everything. Please keep in touch! Its really not that hard! (well sorta) And dont dodge hanging out with everybody over the summer!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
*Thinkin bout the possibilities ahead and I'm liking what I see.
*Lookin foward to the next chaprter. Hoping you'll be a big part of it with me.
*All my life, I've prayed for a day like this and I thank God that I'm graduating.
*Hes only worth a penny.(this one requires a whole journal by itself)

]]> ~BloodyRaven23