deviantART: by:CountElmo

deviantART: by:CountElmo http://search.deviantart.com/?q=by:CountElmo&section=today deviantART RSS for by:CountElmo en-us Copyright 2009, deviantART.com Sun, 27 Dec 2009 05:42:51 PST deviantART.com http://blogs.law.harvard.edu/tech/rss http://s.deviantart.com/minish/widgets/apple-touch-icon-precomposed.png Summertime Shutterbug http://CountElmo.deviantart.com/journal/26717684/ http://CountElmo.deviantart.com/journal/26717684/ Thu, 20 Aug 2009 16:34:47 PDT Why could it be? The main culprit for it would by my artistic inactivity.
I haven't had any new Deviations submitted for a long time. Partly because I was too busy with life, work, etc.
Partly because I didn't photograph that much lately.

Undevelopped rolls in my fridge, with god knows what on it, it makes me wonder ...

But last week I was in Berlin, taking a well deserved vacation break from the busy July working period.
When in July we had this multi facetted festival going on, and lots of people were photographing the bands, the people, the atmosphere, and my trigger finger got itchy.
I had to rekindle my love for the lightscribing again, and hence I was still the analogue man, I first took my dads digital camera, took a few shots (none of them great, because it was the first I used it) and secondly the Nikon from work.
I experimented a bit, took a few good ones and was all retaken by the shutterbug.
I'll upload the good ones soon, but they're on my work computer.

Now, in Berlin I had my old trusty Pentax analogue beast with me, 2 lenses (50mm 1.8 and a 28-80mm) and the leftover unused rolls in the fridge (2 cheap colour rolls of 200 ASA, 1 Kodak Tri-X 400 ASA my preferred format, 1 Kodak CN Sepia film 400 ASA and a Kodak 3200 ASA that I had still in my camera with only 8 pics taken, so that'll make some funky double exposures later when I re-use it).

First days I used my colours to do some basic touristy pics of stuff, but the last day or so, we went to Olympia Stadium, which unfortunately was closed due to the World Championships Athletics (amazing recordbreaking stuff going over there) but the stadium itself was only open for people with tickets, so saddly no grainy shots of Nazi Architecture for me.
But not far from the stadium there is this amazing site called Teufelsberg ( check for directions).

Amazing, all I can say, I shot almost 2 rolls of film on the place.

Hope they turn out well when I get the rolls developped, and scanned!

New Deviations are coming your way, so look out for those beauties, oh yeah (F. Mercury - Queen)

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
* Chuck Norris can divide by zero.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

*Some Photography Groups I (in)directly belong to or am interested in, just because I'm a lazy ass photographer, and I need a task to start shooting

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

*Would someone be interested in a petition to resurrect the :calvin: & :hobbes: emotes? They are missed by many!

Commenting a GOGO
postscriptum of importance:

I like comments, and I know it's hard to do something better than "I like it" or "Nice model, give me her phonenumber", so let's uphold to the following rules

:: Join The Comment Revolution!

And to go a bit further in the above, and also promote community spirit, go and hit this random deviation button, and give it critique, wether or n... ]]> ~CountElmo Springtime for Hitler! http://CountElmo.deviantart.com/journal/23989578/ http://CountElmo.deviantart.com/journal/23989578/ Tue, 31 Mar 2009 16:41:20 PDT Seriously, rent that movie, great laugh.

Anyhow, almost 15.000 pageviews, I can't believe it that I came that far, with my meager and measely gallery.
I know, I know, I'll have to start submitting when I get my 15k views,
just haven't been photographing lately (5 rolls a year ain't much, still undevelopped goodness awaiting in the fridge).

Been to busy with effing real life taking away all my precious free time away. Damn you work!

So, for the person screengrabbing the 15.000, choose a piece, and I'll make a print and send it to you, how does that sound for making ammends?

Good ~~hunting~~, I mean PRTSC-ing!

And now I'm of to the spring sun (but it's night? shh inner voice, don't confuse the readers!)

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
* Chuck Norris can divide by zero.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

*Some Photography Groups I (in)directly belong to or am interested in, just because I'm a lazy ass photographer, and I need a task to start shooting

:: Join The Comment Revolution!

And to go a bit further in the above, and also promote community spirit, go and hit this random deviation button, and give it critique, wether or not you like it.
Just make sure the deviation is utterly random!

*More commenting goodness:
Usefull DeviantArt Resources *by ~scoota269
The Art of Commenting * by !inziladun
How to make better comments *by `leodadominico
Coshs Guide to Commenting *by `coshdaddy
Commenting for Dummies *by ~TheDevilMyself
ULTIMATE Photography Critique *by `Doubtful-Della
Critique Standards *by *ProCritique
How to give helpfull critique *by `GoblinQueeen
*This one's very thouroughly tought about!
http://CountElmo.deviantart.com/journal/23510759/ Tue, 03 Mar 2009 16:22:18 PST JamesRiot

SUPPOSEDLY if you've seen over 85 movies, you have no life. Mark the ones you've seen. There are 239 movies on this list. Copy this list, go to your own journal, and paste. Then, put x's next to the movies you've seen, add them up, change the header adding your number, and click post at the bottom.

(X) Rocky Horror Picture Show
(X) Grease
(X) Pirates of the Caribbean
(X) Pirates of the Caribbean 2: Dead Man's Chest
(X) Boondock Saints
(x) Fight Club
( ) Starsky and Hutch
(X) Neverending Story
(x) Blazing Saddles
(x) Airplane
Total: 9

(x) The Princess Bride
( ) AnchorMan
(x) Napoleon Dynamite
(x) Labyrinth
( ) Saw
( ) Saw II
( ) White Noise
(x) White Oleander
( ) Anger Management
( ) 50 First Dates
(x) The Princess Diaries
( ) The Princess Diaries 2: Royal Engagement
Total so far: 14

(x) Scream
(x) Scream 2
(x) Scream 3
(x) Scary Movie
(x) Scary Movie 2
( ) Scary Movie 3
( ) Scary Movie 4
(X) American Pie
(X) American Pie 2
( ) American Wedding
( ) American Pie Band Camp
Total so far: 21

( ) Harry Potter 1
( ) Harry Potter 2
( ) Harry Potter 3
( ) Harry Potter 4
( ) Resident Evil 1
( ) Resident Evil 2
(X) The Wedding Singer
( ) Little Black Book
(X) The Village
( ) Lilo & Stitch
Total so far: 23

( ) Finding Nemo
(x) Finding Neverland
( ) Signs
( ) The Grinch
(x) Texas Chainsaw Massacre
( ) Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Beginning
( ) White Chicks
( ) Butterfly Effect
( ) 13 Going on 30
( ) I, Robot
(x) Robots
Total so far: 26

( ) Dodgeball: A True Underdog Story
(x) Universal Soldier
( ) Lemony Snicket: A Series Of Unfortunate Events
( ) Along Came Polly
(x) Deep Impact
( ) KingPin
( ) Never Been Kissed
( ) Meet The Parents
( ) Meet the Fockers
( ) Eight Crazy Nights
( ) Joe Dirt
(X) King Kong
Total so far: 29

( ) A Cinderella Story
(x) The Terminal
( ) The Lizzie McGuire Movie
( ) Passport to Paris
(x) Dumb & Dumber
( ) Dumber & Dumberer
(x) Final Destination
(x) Final Destination 2
( ) Final Destination 3
(x) Halloween
(x) The Ring
(x) The Ring 2
( ) Surviving X-MAS
( ) Flubber
Total so far: 36

( ) Harold & Kumar Go To White Castle
( ) Practical Magic
( ) Chicago
( ) Ghost Ship
(x) From Hell
(x) Hellboy
(x) Secret Window
( ) I Am Sam
(x) The Whole Nine Yards
( ) The Whole Ten Yards
Total so far: 40

( ) The Day After Tomorrow
(x) Child's Play
( ) Seed of Chucky
(x) Bride of Chucky
( ) Ten Things I Hate About You
( ) Just Married
(x) Gothika
(x) Nightmare on Elm Street
( ) Sixteen Candles
( ) Remember the Titans
(x) Coach Carter
(x) The Grudge
( ) The Grudge 2
(X) The Mask
( ) Son Of The Mask
Total so far: 47

(X) Bad Boys
( ) Bad Boys 2
( ) Joy Ride
( ) Lucky Number Sleven
(x) Ocean's Eleven
(x) Ocean's Twelve
(x) Bourne Identity
(x) Bourne Supremacy
( ) Lone Star
( ) Bedazzled
(x) Predator I
(x) Predator II
(x) The Fog
(X) Ice Age
(X) Ice Age 2: The Meltdown
( ) Curious George
Total so far: 57

(x) Independence Day
(x) Cujo
(x) A Bronx Tale
(x) Darkness Falls
(x) Christine
(x) ET
(x) Children of the Corn
( ) My Bosses Daughter
( ) Maid in Manhattan
( ) War of the Worlds
(X) Rush Hour
( ) Rush Hour 2
Total so far: 65

( ) Best Bet
( ) How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days
( ) She's All That
(x) Calendar Girls
(x) Sideways
(X) Mars Attacks
( ) Event Horizon
( ) Ever After
(X) Wizard of Oz
(X) Forrest Gump
(x) Big Trouble in Little China (all time favorite movie)
(x) The Terminator
(x) The Terminator 2
(x) The Terminator 3
Total so far: 74

(x) X-Men
(x) X2
( ) X-3
(X) Spider-Man
(X) Spider-Man 2
( ) Sky High
( ) Jeepers Creepers
( ) Jeepers Creepers 2
( ) Catch Me If You Can
(X) The Little Mermaid
( ) Freaky Friday
( ) Reign of Fire
( ) The Skulls
(X) Cruel Intentions
( ) Cruel Intentions 2
( ) The Hot Chick
(X) Shrek
(x) Shrek 2
Total so far: 82

(x) Swimfan
(x) Miracle on 34th street
( ) Old School
( ) The Notebook
( ) K-Pax
(x) Krippendorf's Tribe
(X) A Walk to Remember
( ) Ice Castle
( ) Boogeyman
( ) T... ]]> ~CountElmo Spring, Summer and Fall http://CountElmo.deviantart.com/journal/21066610/ http://CountElmo.deviantart.com/journal/21066610/ Sun, 19 Oct 2008 16:04:41 PDT

The last remnants of what appeared to be a little Indian Summer have finally faded for the cold and brewing weather of fall.

Fall, is in essence, for me the photographic seasons, with it's vivid colourscheme, ever changing in front of our eyes.

It also is a season of rapid change, so maybe my artistic dryspell can be overcome!

Workwise, the halftime has become a full time as of November.
My weekend shifts still are exhausting, and the upcoming weeks and next month won't change that. Every weekend 2 days/nights in a row.
My biorhythm is completely fucked up, as I was a night creature before, but now I certainly am ever so much!

Can't complain really, the job is always full of surprises, it always is different from party to party.
The music is most of the time not really my cup of tea, but weekends like the last one keep me happy.
How would you react when you enter your venue, only to see it occupied by girls only? Too bad my sole position as a man quickly got overhauled as others enter the fray.

So, till the next update on life, the universe and everything in between!

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
* Chuck Norris can divide by zero.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

*Some Photography Groups I (in)directly belong to or am interested in, just because I'm a lazy ass photographer, and I need a task to start shooting

On a different note, my 10 000th pageview is glooming closer and closer.
Should you be the person that makes a snapshot of it and send it to me, you'll receive a print of your choosing from my gallery, just to celebrate this marker in my online existance.

I haven't been the most contributing artists, or the best executed, productive and the likes, but I'll promise i'll try harder to take pictures again that seem to captivate and mesmerise you all.

Many thanks in advance to the lucky one (hope it won't be me myself, happened before).

Off to bed!

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
* Chuck Norris can divide by zero.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

*Some Photography Groups I (in)directly belong to or am interested in, just because I'm a lazy ass photographer, and I need a task to start shooting

Get a job
Get a driving license
Find a girlfriend

And all will be grand for the rest of 2008!

Tallyho

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
* Chuck Norris can divide by zero.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

*Some Photography Groups I (in)directly belong to or am interested in, just because I'm a lazy ass photographer, and I need a task to start shooting

) which was enjoyable as well.
Some friends got married and asked me to photograph their wedding.
If I find time, I'll up the good ones, with permission of them.

But slowly the real world was seeping back into my life, and I realised I still had no real regular job, and it was becoming time that I should get one, because I was tired of my financial situations, not able to by myself some stuff once in a while.

So I started looking around for places where they needed a stage engineer, preferably full time.
Still no drivers license nor a car, which hurt a lot in my quest for work (a sound and light engineer with no license=not very interesting).

But lo and behold, there's maybe light at the end of the unemployment tunnel.
At the beginning of Octobre I saw a job opening at De Vooruit, a famous and well renowned Belgian ArtsCentre.
They were searching for a bartender for evening/nightshifts (with my current biorythm, ideal!).
I thought to myself, in the mean time I'll be a bartender, I earn money, I can save for my driving license, etc.
When they reviewed my CV, they saw that I had done some course of light and sound engineering, and that I was more inclined to be a stage engineer, than to be a bartender, and luckily for me, they had a job opening for a stage engineer in Decembre, so they asked me for an interview.

I would've skipped like a schoolgirl, but when I heard the great news I was sitting in a train, so it would be a bit ridiculous.
I did the interview, which went well (I had a good feeling about it) but they said that they were a bit busy then, with the Filmfestival Ghent coming up, and they would choose in november.

Around now.
So I patiently waited.

Last week, I saw the job opening for the bartender again, so I wrote an e-mail, asking if they had chosen the lucky bastard to work for them as an engineer, if negative, I'd still be willing to apply for the bartender position.
They had not chosen already, and would do it the upcoming weeks, and notify me.

So right now (when I'm not typing) I'm knocking on wood.
I really want this job, it would be the best, because it's an amazing place to work, it's in my own city (so no car required), lots of different things to do there, ranging from theatre to modern dance, to gigs to parties, a very good reference in my CV.
And best, a regular salary, enough to save money, buy myself some things when I want, etc.

So to all my readers, watchers and friends, light some candles for me, knock every piece of wood you come across, pray, whatever!

To be continued!

CountElmo
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Best of the Chuck

* Chuck Norris is 1/8th Cherokee. This has nothing to do with ancestry, the man ate an Indian.
* To prove it isn't that big of a deal to beat cancer. Chuck Norris smoked 15 cartons of cigarettes a day for 2 years and acquired 7 different kinds of cancer only to rid them from his body by flexing for 30... ]]> ~CountElmo Genius! http://CountElmo.deviantart.com/journal/13238080/ http://CountElmo.deviantart.com/journal/13238080/ Wed, 06 Jun 2007 10:58:50 PDT YES!

I finally did it!
I finally tackled mathemathics, and got my highschool diploma!

Now I'm a certified photographer

But that's not really what I want to be.
I want to be the one that stands behind mixingboards, lightboards or on stage, setting up microphones and the likes.

At the moment I'm following this course, and right now I'm doing my internship at a student radio Urgent.fm.
Also at a concert club, but the last concerts are behind me now.

So I'm a little busy with stuff other than my art, so I haven't really taken photo's in a long time!

2 more weeks, and I'll be thrown into the world of adults, and then I'm supposed to look for a job.
Guess most of it will be freelance.

Anyhow, lets all rejoice, and have a nice cool beer!

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Best of the Chuck

* Chuck Norris is 1/8th Cherokee. This has nothing to do with ancestry, the man ate an Indian.
* To prove it isn't that big of a deal to beat cancer. Chuck Norris smoked 15 cartons of cigarettes a day for 2 years and acquired 7 different kinds of cancer only to rid them from his body by flexing for 30 minutes. Beat that, Lance Armstrong.
* There is no theory of evolution, just a list of creatures Chuck Norris allows to live.
* Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried.
* Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.
* Chuck Norris can divide by zero.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

*Some Photography Groups I (in)directly belong to or am interested in, just because I'm a lazy ass photographer, and I need a task to start shooting

But then again, I never tried anything to further that cause

*Workwise, there's some little sunrays at the horizon.
This Youth Cultural Centre needs a technician, I helped them out some times, they know me. But unfortunately they are going for open job interviews. Can't blame them though. I'm still a bit wet behind the ears, and maybe someone with more experience will get the job.
We'll see, it's in january.

*At exactly 17u30 next week marks another landmark in my life: I'm turning 25
Flowers nor aureoles!
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Best of the Chuck

* Chuck Norris is 1/8th Cherokee. This has nothing to do with ancestry, the man ate an Indian.
* To prove it isn't that big of a deal to beat cancer. Chuck Norris smoked 15 cartons of cigarettes a day for 2 years and acquired 7 different kinds of cancer only to rid them from his body by flexing for 30 minutes. Beat that, Lance Armstrong.
* There is no theory of evolution, just a list of creatures Chuck Norris allows to live.
* Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried.
* Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.
* Chuck Norris can divide by zero.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

*Some Photography Groups I (in)directly belong to or am interested in, just because I'm a lazy ass photographer, and I need a task to start shooting

Our altruistic goal is to make some deviations better known. Not those from high profiled deviants, not from the new, from the middle ones.

Here is the official statement:

Welcome To Buried Treasure!!!

We are a community where "buried deviations" will be on display. This community is about helping artists: "popular" ones that are forgotten, unknown artists... actually any artist that needs some display!

We work via suggestions made by you! click here to learn how to make suggestions.

Want to Help out?

1. Spread to word!
Put our stamp in your journal: by typing : thumb 27375006 : without spaces
(this is a subscriper only feature)
You could also place our icon in your journal or somewhere else : iconburiedtreasure : without the spaces

.

2. Make suggestions!!!

Now get digging!!
The buried treasure staff

=amethyste, =larafairie, `pinkcookie, =ibas, =satanic57, =PrincessArwen, ~sicken, *ilona, ~http://CountElmo.deviantart.com/journal/9234282/ Fri, 30 Jun 2006 16:45:20 PDT No Deviantart for me, as hard as I tried, as hard as I longed, but to no avail!
Something evil denied me my daily pleasure of checking up my account, searching for new stuff, new people, new influences, ...

I realised how "addicted" I was, how I longed for my daily shot of deviousness.
It broke up my daily ritual of turning my computer on, and the first things to do were checking my e-mails and Deviantart.

How I missed thee oh greenish grayish pot of art!

And even stranger was that I wasn't the only one being affected.
Apparently =oldfashioned had been plagued too!

The site wouldn't load, I'd get time-outs. So I thought something was wrong over in ole US of A with some server thingamabobs.
But when it wasn't over the second day, or the third, I started wondering what was wrong.
I tried loading in bloody Internet Explorer, scanned for virusses and spyware, rebooted my router, tried my neighbours computer (but he shares his internet connection with me through wireless, so that didn't work either), sought for help with my more computer knowledgable geeky helpdesk friends.
Nothing.

Then someone I asked to check if she could visit Deviantart if it was something worldwide told me that it happened before to her.
She immediately guessed my ISP by the fault I got.

And then today =oldfashioned put up in his msn name that he was too experiencing difficulties.

Finally, 1 o'clock at night, 1st of july, everything turned normal again.
And I was never this glad!
(maybe, except when I had tried for 5 days working on my computer, to get my internet to work a few years earlier! But that's a whole story I wont bother you with).

My message centre smiled at me with 335D, 1H, 5C, 5P and 73J, so I'll have some catching up to do!

Tallyho then!

PS: It also affected MySpace.
Were there others who had the same problems, or experienced them before?

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Could it be that this day, the sixth of june of the year 2006, marks the end of humankind?
That this mythological/biblical person dubbed AntiChrist will be born today, or will manifest?
What is the significance of this so called "Number of the Beast"?
Who is, or was this Antichrist?
Many people have been given this illustrious title. There are dozens of theories that give one the right to bear it.

From the Wiki article:
In English, another example is the case of Adolf Hitler, where numbering the letters A=100, B=101, etc, produces H+I+T+L+E+R=666. Another numerological candidate is Henry Kissinger. Letting A=6, B=12, C=18, etc, produces K+I+S+S+I+N+G+E+R=666. Many people can be proved to be the Antichrist using this method. For example, Jesus himself is the Antichrist by letting A=9, B=18, C=27, D=36, and so forth: J+E+S+U+S = 90 + 45 + 171 + 189 + 171 = 666. In fact, getting someone's name to add up to 666 involves solving a very simple linear diophantine equation.

Some strange accusations have been made.
Bob Saget is one (seriously, this could be true! He never did anything remotely funny!) and even Prince William of Brittain.

Need more Anti-Christ?

However, as most religions have their shared tales and beliefs, thousands of Anti-Christs would be prowling the earth, ready to corrupt mankind.
But isn't mankind the Anti-Christ all together? For we shall be our own undoing!

Give this day a blast, do something!

And don't get hexakosioihexekontahexaphobia
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Best of the Chuck

* Chuck Norris is 1/8th Cherokee. This has nothing to do with ancestry, the man ate an Indian.
* To prove it isn't that big of a deal to beat cancer. Chuck Norris smoked 15 cartons of cigarettes a day for 2 years and acquired 7 different kinds of cancer only to rid them from his body by flexing for 30 minutes. Beat that, Lance Armstrong.
* There is no theory of evolution, just a list of creatures Chuck Norris allo... ]]> ~CountElmo 06-06-2006: Day of the Beast! http://CountElmo.deviantart.com/journal/8984761/ http://CountElmo.deviantart.com/journal/8984761/ Tue, 06 Jun 2006 04:48:23 PDT That this mythological/biblical person dubbed AntiChrist will be born today, or will manifest?
What is the significance of this so called "Number of the Beast"?
Who is, or was this Antichrist?
Many people have been given this illustrious title. There are dozens of theories that give one the right to bear it.

From the Wiki article:
In English, another example is the case of Adolf Hitler, where numbering the letters A=100, B=101, etc, produces H+I+T+L+E+R=666. Another numerological candidate is Henry Kissinger. Letting A=6, B=12, C=18, etc, produces K+I+S+S+I+N+G+E+R=666. Many people can be proved to be the Antichrist using this method. For example, Jesus himself is the Antichrist by letting A=9, B=18, C=27, D=36, and so forth: J+E+S+U+S = 90 + 45 + 171 + 189 + 171 = 666. In fact, getting someone's name to add up to 666 involves solving a very simple linear diophantine equation.

Some strange accusations have been made.
Bob Saget is one (seriously, this could be true! He never did anything remotely funny!) and even Prince William of Brittain.

Need more Anti-Christ?

However, as most religions have their shared tales and beliefs, thousands of Anti-Christs would be prowling the earth, ready to corrupt mankind.
But isn't mankind the Anti-Christ all together? For we shall be our own undoing!

Give this day a blast, do something!

We work via suggestions made by you! click here to learn how to make suggestions.

Want to Help out?

1. Spread to word!
Put our stamp in your journal: by typing : thumb 27375006 : without spaces
(this is a subscriper only feature)
You could... ]]> ~CountElmo How much wood would a woodchuck Chuck Norris? http://CountElmo.deviantart.com/journal/7978436/ http://CountElmo.deviantart.com/journal/7978436/ Thu, 23 Feb 2006 07:16:19 PST limpsharp's journal:

Chuck Norris can win a game of Monopoly without owning any property.

In an average living room there are 1,242 objects Chuck Norris could use to kill you, including the room itself.

Chuck Norris is the only man to ever defeat a brick wall in a game of tennis.

Chuck Norris can divide by zero.

Chuck Norris sold his soul to the devil for his rugged good looks and
unparalleled martial arts ability. Shortly after the transaction was finalized, Chuck roundhouse kicked the devil in the face and took his soul back. The devil, who appreciates irony, couldn't stay mad and admitted he should have seen it coming. They now play poker every second Wednesday of the month.

A man once asked Chuck Norris if his real name is "Charles". Chuck Norris did not respond, he simply stared at him until he exploded.

Chuck Norris can make a woman climax by simply pointing at her and saying "booya!".

Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.

Chuck Norris once shot a German plane down with his finger, by yelling, "Bang!"

The chief export of Chuck Norris is pain.

Chuck Norris often asks people to pull his finger. When they do, he roundhouses them in the abdomen. Then he farts.

Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming "Law" and "Order" are trademarked names for his left and right legs.

If you ask Chuck Norris what time it is, he always says, "Two seconds till." After you ask, "Two seconds till what?" he roundhouse kicks you in the face.

If you can see Chuck Norris, he can see you. If you can't see Chuck Norris you may be only seconds away from death.

Since 1940, the year Chuck Norris was born, roundhouse kick related deaths have increased 13,000 percent.

There are no disabled people. Only people who have met Chuck Norris.

It as once believed that Chuck Norris actually lost a fight to a pirate, but that is a lie, created by Chuck Norris himself to lure more pirates to him.

Chuck Norris doesn't believe in God. God believes in Chuck Norris.

When Chuck Norris's wife burned the turkey one Thanksgiving, Chuck said, "Don't worry about it honey," and went into his backyard. He came back five minutes later with a live turkey, ate it whole, and when he threw it up a few seconds later it was fully cooked and came with cranberry sauce. When his wife asked him how he had done it, he gave her a roundhouse kick to the face and said, "Never question Chuck Norris."

Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried.

It takes 14 puppeteers to make Chuck Norris smile, but only 2 to make him destroy an orphanage.

There is no theory of evolution, just a list of creatures Chuck Norris allows to live.

Chuck Norris has two speeds: walk and kill.

When Chuck Norris was born, the nurse said, "Holy sh*t! That's Chuck Norris!" Then she had had sex with him. At that point, she was the third girl he had slept with.

Chuck Norris does not hunt because the word hunting infers the probability of failure. Chuck Norris goes killing.

To prove it isn't that big of a deal to beat cancer. Chuck Norris smoked 15 cartons of cigarettes a day for 2 years and acquired 7 different kinds of cancer only to rid them from his body by flexing for 30 minutes. Beat that, Lance Armstrong.

Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.

When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.

A blind man once stepped on Chuck Norris' shoe. Chuck replied, "Don't you know who I am? I'm Chuck Norris!" The mere mention of his name cured this man blindness. Sadly the first, last, and only thing this man ever saw, was a fatal roundhouse delivered by Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King, and got one.

When Chuck Norris sends in his taxes, he sends blank forms and includes only a picture of himself, crouched and ready to attack. Chuck Norris has not had to pay taxes ever.

Chuck Norris can touch MC Hammer.

Chuck Norris once ate three 72 oz. steaks in one hour. He spent the first 45 minutes having sex with his waitress.

Chuck Norris always has sex on the first date. Always.

Chuck Norris sleeps with a night light. Not because Chuck Norris is afraid of the dark, but the dark is afraid of Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris likes to knit sweaters in his free time. And by "knit", I mean "kick", and by "sweaters", I mean "babies".

Chuck Norris endorses the journal of *limpsharp. And no one else. Ever.

As a teen Chuck Norris impregnated every nun in a convent tucked away in... ]]> ~CountElmo Promotion Galore! http://CountElmo.deviantart.com/journal/7564262/ http://CountElmo.deviantart.com/journal/7564262/ Tue, 10 Jan 2006 13:08:47 PST May it bring everything your hearts desire!

I got myself some 2nd hand scanner from a friend, hasn't been used a lot.
Weeeee

Now I can finally begin digitising a lot, after I printed some pictures offcourse.
Me being the analogue whore that I am.

Next up: Promotion

A new group has been founded recently.
Buried Treasure
All props and kudos go to =amethyste for founding it and rallying us all to participate.
By some strange twist of fate I landed in the position for checking Digital Art

Our altruistic goal is to make some deviations better known. Not those from high profiled deviants, not from the new, from the middle ones.

Here is the official statement:

Welcome To Buried Treasure!!!

We are a community where "buried deviations" will be on display. This community is about helping artists: "popular" ones that are forgotten, unknown artists... actually any artist that needs some display!

We work via suggestions made by you! click here to learn how to make suggestions.

Want to Help out?

1. Spread to word!
Put our stamp in your journal: by typing : thumb 27375006 : without spaces
(this is a subscriper only feature)
You could also place our icon in your journal or somewhere else : iconburiedtreasure : without the spaces .

2. Make suggestions!!!

Now get digging!!
The buried treasure staff

=amethyste, =larafairie, *pinkcookie, =ibas, =satanic57, =PrincessArwen, ~sicken, *ilona, ~CountElmo, =GFXPunk & *whorer-movie

and the great great giver =MonTemplar: go and give him a hug for buying us a subscription!!!

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

*Some Photography Groups I (in)directly belong to or am interested in, just because I'm a lazy ass photographer, and I need a task to start shooting
*the-abandoned-album
=onewordphoto
*OneClickPhoto
*OnAssignment

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

*Would someone be interested in a petition to resurrect the :calvin: & :hobbes: emotes? They are missed by many!

Commenting a GOGO
postscriptum of importance:

I like comments, and I know it's hard to do something better than "I like it" or "Nice model, give me her phonenumber", so let's uphold to the following rules
http://CountElmo.deviantart.com/journal/7160205/ Sun, 27 Nov 2005 16:40:55 PST And what a surprise I got!

The only obstacle left between now and finally high school graduation is mathematics!
(and around 9 months)
And there I stood, thinking I had 3 exams to redo

There was much rejoicing!

Now, the only thing for me to do is to truly prepare myself for the exam in octobre, so I wont have to return. Ever again.

My 1981th viewer
He was the lucky and friendly chap who provided me with the evidence of 1981 pageviews. Thus he wins a print of one of my deviations, and he chose this one.
Yet again, thank you Zeldenhandel

A few days before, he tagged me , the dirty scroundel!
I hoped to be spared of the whole tagging thinga-majig. Guess not.
So I'll fulfill his request, but the chain breaks here!
Me evil!

The Rule of Three

Three names you go by
1. Benny (most of the people in my youthclub call me by that name
2. Benjamin (my true name, and most of my theatre troupe call me so)
3. Benji (NO, not that scruffy dog, just some people from Aalst call me that, every resemblance with the mutt is truly accidental! )

Three screen names you've had
1. CountElmo (my online name since when I first got online years ago)
2. Sexyspice (hehe, for extreme cybersex in mIRC when I was 16 and bored. You must've seen the private requests I got when I used it )
3. Dr Betterfood (an alias I used when I wrote some stuff long long ago)

Three physical things you like about yourself
1. My eyes
2. My physique (and amazing lightning fast metabolism. I can eat what I want and never worry about gaining weight)
3. My quirkyness

Three physical things you don't like about yourself
1. My graveyard aligned teeth, and the messed up state they're in sometimes
2. my scrawny body (I'd have to follow Zeldenhandel on this one, I wished I had some more muscles, not chippendale/wrestler like, but more like just a bit more to cover my xylophone chest, and to be a bit stronger
I'm pretty weak
3. My overproductive sweat glands. I sweat a lot, not always smelly sweat, but just a lot. For instance at a party, I just barely started dancing, I'm soaked allready.
No wonder I'm still single

Three parts of your heritage
1. My creativity
2. My Bourgondy views on life (I like to eat and drink, and enjoy doing it. My parents had their own restaurant years ago)
3. I suck at maths (so did my mom)

Three things that scare you
1. Spiders (almost a phobia, but not yet)
2. To approach unknown, attractive (in my opinion) women whom I like
3. To die a bitter old man, alone, lonely (because of aforementioned)

Three of your everyday essentials
1. Music
2. Social contact
3. Coffee

Three things you are wearing right now
1. 2 black sweaters, one hooded, one plain
2. Grey scarf
3. Goatwool socks! (hey, it's darn cold, and my place isn't really that isolated)

Three of your favorite bands/musical artists
1. The Mars Volta
2. Roisin Murphy/Moloko
3. Red Hot Chili Peppers

Three of your favorite songs
1. No one knows - Queens of the Stone Age
2. Creep (Acoustic version) - Radiohead ~CountElmo 5 devs spanking new! Get them while they're hot! http://CountElmo.deviantart.com/journal/7011534/ http://CountElmo.deviantart.com/journal/7011534/ Thu, 10 Nov 2005 17:33:24 PST One request to the person who is my 1981th viewer
Could you take a screenshot and send it to me? It's my year of birth, and it means a lot to me.
Maybe I'll surprise the one who is with something!
As a matter of fact, I'll let them pick one of my pictures, and I'll print one on the desired format of choice! (within the boundaries of printing ofcourse)

All rolls of film processed. Some pictures printed. DIGITISED.
(see previous journal for more info)
So 5 new deviations for your pleasure only!

Today last exams.
They went well, they even took a look at my pictures and decided to grade them, despite the fact that didn't have been there on the proper date to do it.
Someone likes me out there!

Now it's eagerly waiting in anticipation for the final proclamation on the 25th, so that I know wich exams I have to redo in Octobre.

My guesses? Maths, Optica and Company Management (< Bedrijfsbeheer in Dutch)

We'll see what time has in store for me!

To change the subject:
I found this on the journal of Super-Munkeyboy

(A) First, recommend to me:
1. a movie
2. a book
3. a musical artist, song, or album

(B) I want everyone who reads this to ask me three questions, no more, no less. Ask me anything you want. No kidding, ANYTHING, I'll give you the absolute honest truth, to the best of my ability.

(C) Then I want you to go to your journal, copy and paste this allowing your friends to ask you anything.

I'll give you mine, though it was hard just picking one for every category.
Note that this isn't final, I could go on for ages nameing my preferences.

1. Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind
2. Perfume by Süskind
3. Roisin Murphy

*Some Photography Groups I (in)directly belong to or am interested in
*the-abandoned-album
=onewordphoto
*OneClickPhoto
*OnAssignment

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

*Would someone be interested in a petition to resurrect the :calvin: & :hobbes: emotes? They are missed by many!

Commenting a GOGO
postscriptum of importance:

I like comments, and I know it's hard to do something better than "I like it" or "Nice model, give me her phonenumber", so let's uphold to the following rules

Wish me luck with my last two exams thursday!
I'll definately need it.

To change the subject:
I found this on the journal of Super-Munkeyboy

(A) First, recommend to me:
1. a movie
2. a book
3. a musical artist, song, or album

(B) I want everyone who reads this to ask me three questions, no more, no less. Ask me anything you want. No kidding, ANYTHING, I'll give you the absolute honest truth, to the best of my ability.

(C) Then I want you to go to your journal, copy and paste this allowing your friends to ask you anything.

I'll give you mine, though it was hard just picking one for every category.
Note that this isn't final, I could go on for ages nameing my preferences.

1. Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind
2. Perfume by Süskind
3. Roisin Murphy

*Some Photography Groups I (in)directly belong to or am interested in
*the-abandoned-album
=onewordphoto
*OneClickPhoto
*OnAssignment

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

*Would someone be interested in a petition to resurrect the :calvin: & :hobbes: emotes? They are missed by many!

Commenting a GOGO
postscriptum of importance:

I like comments, and I know it's hard to do something better than "I like it" or "Nice model, give me her phonenumber", so let's uphold to the following rules

Nah, my heart will always be in theatre, and still I'm hoping to become a light engineer, but now the emphasis is on sound at the moment.

Also, I picked up my camera's again to bring you some pictures to view and comment on, but you'll have to wait till they're all developped and scanned. Cause me being a analogue addict (and a poor man whom can't afford a digital SLR yet).

Why the sudden re-interest in photography, I hear you all ask?
Well, here in good ole rainy Belgium, we have this government approved commission that does exams for highschool/secondary school drop-outs like me to finally get a secondary degree/diploma without the hassle of going to school from 8h till 16h. Just pure exams twice a year.

I've been trying for almost three years now (I tend to postpone everything untill it's too late, especially studying), but slowly and steadily I begin to see the end of it.

First why I takes me so long to finally get it.
As I said, I postpone too much, so sometimes I went to exams unprepared or just a little, but not enough to get exemptions. And I chose the wrong direction first. I started with the school program for someone in the Fine Arts.
The last 4 years of my secondary school I studied Audiovisual Arts (Photography and Film) in Aalst, and my drawing and painting skills got rusted after 8 years of non-use. I also had gotten a bit of a desinterest and degout in drawing and painting thanks to some teacher back in third grade (Third grade in Belgium that is, from secondary school for my international readers, hope I'll make myself clear

). No need to say I flunked hard on those practical exams.
For most of my theoretic courses I've gotten a exemption (except maths, my eternal nemesis) but I knew I wouldn't get my practicals.
So I changed to photography, in Technicians School (still just the government exams, no full-time school) a few weeks ago.
Lots of new courses entered the fray (yay more studying) such as Optica, Photographic chemistry, Theory about colour and digital photography and the likes.

But then comes the practical part of it. Taking some pictures, and this friday I have to present them and discuss them with the jurymembers, the examinators.

1. A photographic series, on 1 common subject, depicting your street, town or village in colour. On Dia-slide film. Results get in tomorrow.
2. 1 portrait in daylight. No flash, no studio lighting. Results thursday
Actually, I'm going to print another one from the same series as Alas my lost love as most of my viewers wanted to see another one!
3. 2 landscape pictures. 1 with emphasis on air, 1 on ground. Results Thursday
4. A still-life with minimum 3 objects on location. With great help from =oldfashioned and some of his pieces of assembled "Objets Trouvées". Processing done, results Thursday.

So, somewhere next week, I'll try to digitise them ASAP and up them for your viewing pleasure only!

That's it for now. I'll report on my exam progress later when the proclamation has been. I have a good feeling about most of them, but me being a realistic pessimist, I'll expect the worst, not to get dissappointed

I will always let the Commenting a GOGO section be some kind of Signature to my journals.
And I know, I dont always adhere to them. But I'll make it a priority to comment on all my favourites on a good way describe below the striped line ~CountElmo Much going on lately + Commenting a GOGO http://CountElmo.deviantart.com/journal/6518604/ http://CountElmo.deviantart.com/journal/6518604/ Fri, 16 Sep 2005 08:18:30 PDT Deviation"

The last 12 or so Deviations were taken on a trip to Antwerp, Belgium.
Me and my best friend Sarah-Jane decided in the beginning of August to go on a little city trip with the intention of taking pictures, and learning her to photograph a bit better and with good equipment.

We had a jolly good time, saw Antwerp from a different side (read: other than the zoo) and took some great pictures.
Oh, and I finally found a jacket that I liked, and didn't bit a huge chunck out of my monthly finances.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

*Would someone be interested in a petition to resurrect the :calvin: & :hobbes: emotes? They are missed by many!

postscriptum of importance:

I like comments, and I know it's hard to do something better than "I like it" or "Nice model, give me her phonenumber", so let's uphold to the following rules
:: Join The Comment Revolution!

And to go a bit further in the above, and also promote community spirit, go and hit this random deviation button, and give it critique, wether or not you like it.
Just make sure the deviation is utterly random!

*More commenting goodness:
Usefull DeviantArt Resources *by =scoota269
The Art of Commenting * by `inziladun
How to make better comments *by `leodadominico
Coshs Guide to Commenting *by `coshdaddy
Commenting for Dummies *by ~TheDevilMyself
ULTIMATE Photography Critique *by =Doubtful-Della
Critique Standards *by ~ProCritique
How to give helpfull critique *by *GoblinQueeen
*This one's very thouroughly tought about!
A New Commenting Structure *by ~taylormemer1

*Other DeviantArt Goodies:
View =Mozilla's journal. Extreme Linkage to Usefulnesss!
Sure wished we all had a DeviantArt Mentor when we started here

* OMG they killed the :calvin: & :hobbes: emotes!
SHAME * ]]> ~CountElmo Not much going on lately + Commenting a GOGO http://CountElmo.deviantart.com/journal/6270157/ http://CountElmo.deviantart.com/journal/6270157/ Mon, 22 Aug 2005 14:43:20 PDT
Not great stuff, but it's stuff.
I actually was my own 1000th visitor, but somehow the page looked wrong.
Guess it all has something to do with my old computer and so
The page actually loaded in WHITE. And I forgot to take a screen capture of it. Boohoohoo.
I shut off Firefox and restarted it, and then there were 1001 visits.
Damn you crappy computer! Damn you!

Also, I demand answers!
I need some formatting tag help to make my journals a bit more graphically challenging. I got this Greasemonkey scripts that works fine for textual stuff, but I would like to but a horizontal rule under this and above the post scriptum.
Anyone got some twocents on it?

*Would someone be interested in a petition to resurrect the :calvin: & :hobbes: emotes? They are missed by many!

postscriptum of importance:

I like comments, and I know it's hard to do something better than "I like it" or "Nice model, give me her phonenumber", so let's uphold to the following rules
:: Join The Comment Revolution!

And to go a bit further in the above, and also promote community spirit, go and hit this random deviation button, and give it critique, wether or not you like it.
Just make sure the deviation is utterly random!

*More commenting goodness:
Usefull DeviantArt Resources *by =scoota269
The Art of Commenting * by `inziladun
How to make better comments *by `leodadominico
Coshs Guide to Commenting *by `coshdaddy
Commenting for Dummies *by ~TheDevilMyself
ULTIMATE Photography Critique *by =Doubtful-Della
Critique Standards *by ~ProCritique
*This one's very thouroughly tought about!
A New Commenting Structure *by ~taylormemer1

*Other DeviantArt Goodies:
View =Mozilla's journal. Extreme Linkage to Usefulnesss!
Sure wished we all had a DeviantArt Mentor when we started here

* OMG they killed the :calvin: & :hobbes: emotes!
SHAME * ]]> ~CountElmo If someone could fill in my request... http://CountElmo.deviantart.com/journal/6233612/ http://CountElmo.deviantart.com/journal/6233612/ Mon, 15 Aug 2005 11:51:14 PDT What is my request?
If the person who is the 1000th visitor on my page could take a screenshot and send it to me. Pretty please.
I cant give you something in return, yet. My financial situation doesn't permit me to do some fun stuff with money
But maybe in the future!

Oh anyone got some tips the help me relieve the pain of sports?
Would be really appreciated. Read below.

To begin with a fair warning to all you people like me, whom dont get much sport in his/her life: nevermind bothering because you'll be aching!

This saturday I played in a little soccer tournament, with my youthclub, and I havent been hurtfree for the last couple of days!
Taking the stairs is a living hell, getting up from bed or when I was sitting down to.
I feel like an 85 year old geezer with reuma all over his body.
All my muscles hurt, like a strain.

It is truly hell, and remember, sports are unhealthy!

And on my next deviations, I'm testing your patience, dear humble viewers and random passer-by'ers. I know, I'm a bad boy.
But it is hard to make an arrangement with my friend so we can meet each other. But I'll promise you, It'll surely be before the end of summer.
So bear with me a little more, I don't like it either, but even I have to wait to get my precious pelicules back.

So, till we meet again

postscriptum of importance:

I like comments, and I know it's hard to do something better than "I like it" or "Nice model, give me her phonenumber", so let's uphold to the following rules
:: Join The Comment Revolution!

And to go a bit further in the above, and also promote community spirit, go hit the random deviation button, and give it critique, wether or not you like it.
Just make sure the deviation is utterly random!

* OMG they killed the :calvin: & :hobbes: emotes!
SHAME ]]> ~CountElmo As the clouds drift away... http://CountElmo.deviantart.com/journal/5577859/ http://CountElmo.deviantart.com/journal/5577859/ Tue, 19 Jul 2005 07:11:39 PDT
Update soon, as soon as I get my photography folder back from my former teacher (actually, it resides now with a friend of mine, but since she has exams right now, i'll have to learn the true meaning of patience).

Be ready for some more grainy wonderfullness made by yours truly.

For the rest, not much new, except, some of my teeth are experiencing a lot of ache, mostly made by a gigantic hole in them.
Dentist appointement made, just have to wait till the 22nd.
I'm a bit afraid what he'll excavate in my mouth, because it has been 8 years since my last visit, and I haven't been the best parent to them teeth of mine....

Well dudes and dudettes, until the next time!

Edit & Update Info:
So my visits at the dentist have proved me wrong. Apparently I have a strong set of teeth whom can endure a lot!
Just a few holes, my wisdomteeth. Now three of them were cleared of it's nerves, one still to go.
And all the toothstone (or how it's called in English) has mostly been drilled of!
Maybe I'll become handsome again!

Guess I'll need braces for that to happen, with my graveyard aligned teeth

And for my new Deviations, just a little more patience my humble viewers.
It's allready in Ghent, now for it to get in my hands again, just a few days at the most. And then it's up to Digitising them.

Untill then!

postscriptum of importance:

I like comments, and I know it's hard to do something better than "I like it" or "Nice model, give me her phonenumber", so let's uphold to the following rules
:: Join The Comment Revolution! ]]> ~CountElmo Today: D-Day http://CountElmo.deviantart.com/journal/5195080/ http://CountElmo.deviantart.com/journal/5195080/ Tue, 26 Apr 2005 13:45:28 PDT D-Day, Deviation Day.

For all those people whom are watching me, those I watch, and those who will watch me...

Or alternatively, to whom it may concern:

Thx to my neighbour and best friend Michiel P. and his scanner I now finally can put some of my illustrious pictures online which I took long ago during my highschool days.
They are all B&W pictures taken with a Pentax, all analogue goodness, all grain!
And now they're digitised!

Now, bear with me, I have to learn a lot about deviantart (and also photography) so some things might seem strange.

If anyone can help me with some tips to make my Deviations more presentable, do not hesitate!

Now here is for your enjoyment, my deviations! ]]> ~CountElmo Finally, some content! http://CountElmo.deviantart.com/journal/4697869/ http://CountElmo.deviantart.com/journal/4697869/ Mon, 28 Feb 2005 22:49:57 PST jobless, money-less, my computer filled itself up again with clutter and the winter has finally set in here in lil' ole Belgium!
The stones (not the band) are freezing out of the ground (or it definetely feels like it)

Yes, i added some content, and I know I'm not the most active member on DA, but i'll try harder to do my best...
My favorites are gaining new submissions everytime when i visit DA.
Mostly it's photography I see and like, from people allready in my favorites.
Guess I'll have to browse some more people and categories!

If you think you can help me, you can always donate some stuff (a digital Pentax or other photography related tidbits ^_^ ) but that would just be plain silly, wont it?
You dont even know me.........yet!
But feel free to do as you please, you can contact me if you like. Pretty please....

(man now I sound like a loser!) ]]> ~CountElmo New things still to come! http://CountElmo.deviantart.com/journal/4353436/ http://CountElmo.deviantart.com/journal/4353436/ Tue, 18 Jan 2005 16:16:08 PST So it became 2005!

Another year gone, a new year ready to be wasted in any means possible!

Illustrator allready installed, now for photoshop, but i'm in dire need of time!

I'm taking online courses through a employment office here in pretty ol' Belgium, so right now i'm polishing my skills with Flash, Dreamweaver and PHP.
It sure isn't simple, but i'll manage.

Hopefully it'll come in handy when searching for a job!
Fingers crossed! ]]> ~CountElmo Giga Free http://CountElmo.deviantart.com/journal/4067229/ http://CountElmo.deviantart.com/journal/4067229/ Tue, 14 Dec 2004 16:19:19 PST
Guess i'll have to start installing some programs then, and start working some magic on them, altough I'll mostly have to repolish my skills
Cause it's been a long time!

Photoshop and Illustrator, here I come! ]]> ~CountElmo Had forgotten it a bit http://CountElmo.deviantart.com/journal/3895155/ http://CountElmo.deviantart.com/journal/3895155/ Mon, 22 Nov 2004 17:14:30 PST
Had lots of stuff on my mind.
(doing exams too get my secondary school degree, got grades today, still flunked mathematics and drawing didn't go well, nothing I didn't expect!)

Guess i'll have to start making deviations!
My page is rather empty for now!

Maybe is i ever get to write some stuff off my Hard drive, i'll have space to do some stuff, right now, i'm to filled with digital happiness! ]]> ~CountElmo The First Entry http://CountElmo.deviantart.com/journal/3464574/ http://CountElmo.deviantart.com/journal/3464574/ Tue, 28 Sep 2004 09:41:48 PDT
hopefully when i have my digital cam, a good scanner and a better computer i can start making deviations myself!

For now i'll lurk in the shadows, and watch and learn (damn exam friday). ]]> ~CountElmo