http://search.deviantart.com/?q=by:DarkCraftAzLan&section=today deviantART RSS for by:DarkCraftAzLan en-us Copyright 2009, deviantART.com Fri, 18 Dec 2009 00:42:47 PST deviantART.com http://blogs.law.harvard.edu/tech/rss http://s.deviantart.com/minish/widgets/apple-touch-icon-precomposed.png http://DarkCraftAzLan.deviantart.com/journal/16732564/ http://DarkCraftAzLan.deviantart.com/journal/16732564/ Tue, 05 Feb 2008 01:17:08 PST [link]) If you want to see it go there, I plan to make an actual website on geocities for my art, but until then, my sheezyart account is the closest you'll get, Deviant Art is pissing me off lately so watchers, if you want, go HERE ([link])

Thanks
Mr.P

]]> ~DarkCraftAzLan http://DarkCraftAzLan.deviantart.com/journal/16395998/ http://DarkCraftAzLan.deviantart.com/journal/16395998/ Sun, 13 Jan 2008 23:13:08 PST
[link]

If you don't go there, you're a smegg head!

Have a good one,
Mr. P

(PS Sorry Megabyte, I wasn't tired! I TRIED!)

]]> ~DarkCraftAzLan http://DarkCraftAzLan.deviantart.com/journal/15577261/ http://DarkCraftAzLan.deviantart.com/journal/15577261/ Mon, 19 Nov 2007 13:42:16 PST
Have a healthy one,
Mr. P

]]> ~DarkCraftAzLan http://DarkCraftAzLan.deviantart.com/journal/15527336/ http://DarkCraftAzLan.deviantart.com/journal/15527336/ Thu, 15 Nov 2007 22:28:42 PST

RULES:
1. Each person tagged must post 8 random facts about themselves.
2. Tags should write a journal of these facts.
3. At the end of the post, 8 or more persons are tagged and named.
4. Go to their page and leave them a comment telling them they're tagged. ( I'll get to this if no one notices the journal)

Well here they are:
1)I ripped my achilles tendon and when it healed, it did short. When I don't keep it in check I walk funny, I also can't run right.
2)I'm crushing for a lesbian
3)I kissed a guy once
4)I like Mika
5)I want to kill my EX
6)I have a queen sized bed, not for the sleeping space
7)I hate cats
8)I LOVE the 1920s

I WILL TAG THESE LOSERS!



]]> ~DarkCraftAzLan http://DarkCraftAzLan.deviantart.com/journal/14597843/ http://DarkCraftAzLan.deviantart.com/journal/14597843/ Wed, 12 Sep 2007 00:11:15 PDT Thats all, comment if you want to know anything else or want a drawing done for them.

Have a good one,
Mr. P

]]> ~DarkCraftAzLan http://DarkCraftAzLan.deviantart.com/journal/14051866/ http://DarkCraftAzLan.deviantart.com/journal/14051866/ Mon, 06 Aug 2007 23:00:47 PDT Also, I would like to announce my hit to 1,000!!! WOOOOO!!! I will be drawing .....something to say thanks, it's stereotypical, but nessesary.

Also, I am always up for requests if you ask.

- Mr.P (name changed)

OH SHIT, almost forgot! P.S. I moved into my new room, so that also slowed me down.

]]> ~DarkCraftAzLan http://DarkCraftAzLan.deviantart.com/journal/13119296/ http://DarkCraftAzLan.deviantart.com/journal/13119296/ Sun, 27 May 2007 23:45:27 PDT
Besides the rude people, the proportions of the meals! HOLY INDIGESTION! I thought the french toast would be 3 peices of normal french toast, Nuh Uh, 6 of em' extra thick, the maple syrup sucks, and the apple juice tasted like over sugared water, everywhere I went. I gained about 20 pounds. I also thought that it was going to be INSANE warm when the weather report said 75 or something, I was wide eyed saying, "HOLY OVEN MUCH?!" then I forgot they don't use celcius, and KiloMeters. Also the money is retarded, all the same colour, handed a lady a 50 instead of a 10, food is 9$ for a sandwich and fries, no drink included, with drink it's around 11$, for that in canada I could buy a better tasting full course meal! IT WAS RETARDED. I also couldn't see the sky the SMOG was so bad, I mean, last journal I was just joking, but it seems it was more along the lines of an acurate prediction! I started to have major troubles breathing (I have asthma so that didn't help). The food is all, over priced, and tastes like shit. Never going back again! Back in canada, first 10 minutes in the airport lot, a bird singing, clear blue sky, mountains, and NO SMOG OR RESPITORY PROBLEMS! It's heaven to be back home!

Sorry americans, but you have it SHITTY down there! No wonder you people are so angry all the time.

Have a good one,
P-Chan

(P.S. Alicia is gorgeous)

]]> ~DarkCraftAzLan http://DarkCraftAzLan.deviantart.com/journal/12983731/ http://DarkCraftAzLan.deviantart.com/journal/12983731/ Wed, 16 May 2007 22:08:49 PDT
Also, I will not really be updating for a while, I'm off to Disneyland for a week! OFF TOO THE GREAT AMERICA, COUNTRY OF SMOG! You know I'm just kidding, you guys are all...special I'm going to get attacked for just posting this I swear...nyeh.

The temptation of saying loudly, "good thing we brought the good bombs, eh?" Because you know, all canadians are potential taliban! JIHAD, EH?

I need to find a canadian flag to sow onto my bag.
Whatever...
Have a good one,
P-Chan

]]> ~DarkCraftAzLan http://DarkCraftAzLan.deviantart.com/journal/12782080/ http://DarkCraftAzLan.deviantart.com/journal/12782080/ Sun, 29 Apr 2007 18:45:55 PDT [link]

yeeeah
Have a good one
Noble ahh f*ck it, P-Chan.

]]> ~DarkCraftAzLan http://DarkCraftAzLan.deviantart.com/journal/12370624/ http://DarkCraftAzLan.deviantart.com/journal/12370624/ Thu, 29 Mar 2007 02:21:49 PDT
HUSBAND WANTED:
MUST BE IN MY AGE GROUP (70's), MUST NOT BEAT ME, MUST NOT RUN AROUND ON ME AND MUST STILL BE GOOD IN BED! ALL APPLICANTS PLEASE APPLY IN PERSON.

On the second day she heard the doorbell Much to her dismay, she opened the door to see a grey-haired gentleman sitting in a wheel chair. He had no arms or legs. The old woman said, "You're not really asking me to consider you, are you? Just look at you...you have no legs!" The old man smiled, "Therefore, I cannot run around on you!" She laughed. "You don't have any arms either!" Again the old man smiled, "Therefore, I can never beat you!" She raised an eyebrow and asked intently, "Are you still good in bed???" The old man leaned back, beamed a big smile and said, "I rang the doorbell didn't I?"

Questions:

1. When I go in I might cause pain. I cause you to spit and ask you not to swallow. I can fill your hole. What am I?

2. A finger goes in me. You fiddle with me when you're bored. The best man always has me first. What am I?

3. I'm spread before I'm eaten. Your tongue gets me off. People sometimes like to lick my nuts. What am I?

4. I go in hard. I come out soft. You blow me hard . What am I?

5. All day long it's in and out. I discharge loads from my shaft. Both men and women go down on me. What am I?

6. I come in many sizes. When I'm not well, I drip. When You blow me you feel good. What am I?

7. If I miss, I hit your bush. It's my job to stuff your box. When I come, it's news. What am I?

8. I offer protection. I get the finger ten times. You use your fingers to get me off. What am I?

9. I assist an erection. Sometimes big balls hang from me. I'm called a big swinger. What am I?

10. I'm at least 6 inches long. I leave foamy lubrication when engaged in my job. What am I?

Answers:

1. a dentist
2. a wedding ring
3. peanut butter
4. chewing gum
5. an elevator
6. a nose
7. a newspaper boy
8. a glove
9. a crane
10. a toothbrush, of course!

While tending to her housework, a woman asks her husband

"Will you please fix the cabinet in the kitchen? It's been barely holding on to it's hinges for weeks now."

He replies "Does it say 'carpenter' on my forehead?"

Surprised, she lets it go and returns to her housework. As she begins to clean the bathroom, she notices that the lever is getting stuck. She yells from the bathroom,

"Honey, the toilet's lever is stuck again! Can you fix it?"

She comes into the living room to find him reading the paper. He responds to the puzzled look on her face with...

"Do I have "plumber" written on my forehead?"

The next day, her husband comes home from work to find the Cabinet fixed, the toilet fixed, and a chipper spouse making the bed in the master bedroom.

"Who fixed everything?"

"A kind young gentleman came by today, said he was a handyman and asked if I needed anything done around the house. When he finished, I said I couldn't pay him with cash because I don't keep it around the house. He mentioned that was fine and that I could pay him by sucking his dick or cooking him a good meal."

"What did you cook for him?"

"Does it say "chef" of my forehead?"

Oh my god,
Have a great one people,
NobleWolf

]]> ~DarkCraftAzLan http://DarkCraftAzLan.deviantart.com/journal/12252572/ http://DarkCraftAzLan.deviantart.com/journal/12252572/ Mon, 19 Mar 2007 23:29:08 PDT
Have a good one,
NobleWolf

]]> ~DarkCraftAzLan http://DarkCraftAzLan.deviantart.com/journal/12233453/ http://DarkCraftAzLan.deviantart.com/journal/12233453/ Sun, 18 Mar 2007 13:59:03 PDT
have a good one, I know I will.
AzLan (Pat)

]]> ~DarkCraftAzLan http://DarkCraftAzLan.deviantart.com/journal/12164077/ http://DarkCraftAzLan.deviantart.com/journal/12164077/ Tue, 13 Mar 2007 01:05:13 PDT I'm gonna get myself a 1967 Cadilac El Dorado Convertable
Hot pink!
With whale skin hub caps
An all leather cow interior
And big brown baby seal eyes for headlights
YEAH!
And I'm gonna drive around in that baby
At 115 miles per hour
Getting one mile per gallon
Sucking down Quarter Pounder cheeseburgers from McDonalds in the old-fashioned non-biodegradable Styrofoam containers
And when I'm done sucking down those grease-ball burgers
I'm gonna wipe my mouth with the American flag
And then I'm gonna toss the Styrofoam containers right out the side
And there ain't a Goddamn thing anybody can do about it
You know why?
'Cause we got the bombs, that's why!
Two words: Nuclear Fuckin' Weapons
Okay!?
Russia, Germany, Romania
They can have all the Democracy they want
They can have a big Democracy cake walk
Right through the middle of Tienemen Square
And it won't make a lick of difference
Because we got the bombs
Okay!?
John Wayne's not dead
He's frozen!
And as soon as we find a cure for cancer We're gonna thaw out "The Duke"
And he's gonna be pretty pissed off
You know why?
Have you ever taken a cold shower?
Well, multiply that by 15 million times
That's how pissed off "The Duke"'s gonna be
I'm gonna get "The Duke"
And John Cassavetes
And Lee Marvin
And Sam Peckinpah
And a case of whiskey
And drive down to Texas

- Denis Leary - I'm an Asshole

Sorry, I love Denis Leary

]]> ~DarkCraftAzLan http://DarkCraftAzLan.deviantart.com/journal/12087680/ http://DarkCraftAzLan.deviantart.com/journal/12087680/ Tue, 06 Mar 2007 22:38:17 PST
Weird Week,
I feel like...I wake up with a feeling that something isn't right today, had it for 5 days now, it's freakin' me out because everytime I get it something has gone wrong, I caught up in Chemistry which is good, but now I'm behind in Socials. Appearently I'm behind in Math as well, which makes no sense because I've handed EVERYTHING in, and got over average on ever test and quiz, but my interm report says I'm below class average...WHAT THE FUCK!? Stupid new teacher is a fuckin' crack pot. My Dog might also be really sick, I love my dog, she is the best dog in the world, I'm the only one that takes care of her, so when I woke up at 1 am to the sound of her puking scared me. She vomited up her entire stomach contents...It's a depressing thing to see a small confused dog shutter and cry because she doesn't know what's wrong. She also had troubles breathing. And for those who don't know, DOGS CAN CRY, I don't mean crying wimpering, I mean eyes glossy, heavy breathing and a small wimper in her exhale. I've raised this dog since she was 8 weeks old, she's broken her leg, been attacked by an owl, and been in 2 fights. All when I wasn't around. She really only listens to me and I'm freaked she might be sick like my family's last Dog, (died of cancer the size of a golf ball, Boston Terrier as well). So, ya, there are much more things but I don't want to waste your time.

Have a good one,
AzLan

]]> ~DarkCraftAzLan http://DarkCraftAzLan.deviantart.com/journal/11855779/ http://DarkCraftAzLan.deviantart.com/journal/11855779/ Sat, 17 Feb 2007 13:50:14 PST
Have a good one,
AzLan

]]> ~DarkCraftAzLan http://DarkCraftAzLan.deviantart.com/journal/11111668/ http://DarkCraftAzLan.deviantart.com/journal/11111668/ Tue, 19 Dec 2006 00:28:49 PST which I still bug her about even now. Most of the days of power outage I spent at the firehall helping out people in need. Besides that, just got cable and internet back today, sorry, no picture updates yet. I'll get some soon.

Have a good one,
AzLan

]]> ~DarkCraftAzLan http://DarkCraftAzLan.deviantart.com/journal/10941880/ http://DarkCraftAzLan.deviantart.com/journal/10941880/ Sun, 03 Dec 2006 21:07:24 PST
I went downtown and I couldn't find the damned place anywhere, so me and Kate went to The twins' (Darren and Shawn) Boxing practice. I went to see if it was something I would like to try out. Anyways, before going to boxing, we went to Bonnie's, their mother. We talked and hanged out there for a while to kill time till 5. Also, to side track, I have troubles with birds, they freak me out, so what happened next was a big accomplishment for me. We were on the subject of birds and the age limit of them when I said I don't really like birds and my problem with them. Bonnie gets up and pulls out her budgie,Bud, and puts him on my shoulder, this was a little weird at first, but afterwards I started to get really comfortable and I can honestly say I really like birds. Also, appearently Bud likes me better then Shawn and Darren because he stayed on my shoulder for the entire time and he usually just flies off of them as soon as he's put on.

BACK TO THE MAIN POINT! At about 4:30 pm Darren forgot he needed insurance on his car, so he took Shawn's and let Bonnie drive, and before they were out the door he said, "I just know it's going to come back with a scratch." Now, the previous information might not seem nessesary right now, but it all leads up to a ironic end to what Shawn said. After about 15 minutes the door suddenly swings open and Darren looking all shaken up at the door. He quickly exclaims, "Shawn, Pat, get your shoes quick." We did so and followed him to the middle of the extremely icy and steap, driveway to see Shawn's car's ass end, into a telephone pole which at this point was leaning a bit over. Bill, Bonnie's room mate gets behind the wheel, shawn on the right end of the bumper, Darren, then me, and the Tree in between Darren and Shawn. Bill starts up the car and we push it enough to move the car. This is the part that really sucks and is great. The car was keeping the rottened out pole from falling on me and Darren.

The pole starts to come down, smacks Darren in the shoulder and in the head, moving him to the side, and his first reaction was to swing his left arm to push me out of the way. Luckily he did so or else I would be dead right now. He pushed me while I was pretty much already in mid slipping which got me out of the way. The funny thing is, that's not the worst part. No the car is ok, not a scratch really, it's that afterwards we walked away from the car and pole, which by the way was only being held up by the wires, and thought of ways to get the car away from the pole. Me and Shawn grabbed shovels and he started to dig on the right tires, while I dug at the left. Darren, at this point, starts to walk down to the car, unfortunately the steps on the icy path leading all the way down the driveway, which was a path straight into the pole. Now, understand, this pole was rotten to the core and was only being held up by the wires. So a 200 pound, pure muscle, 5 foot 10, fighter flying towards it would be more then enough to knock the pole enough to make it roll a bit more, make the wires snap and kill us all. So I reacted hastily, stuck my feet into the ground, and caught him before he hit the pole, in doing so I stopped him, but I fell down

At around 7pm my Mother shows up with Amy and we all went to Tim Hortons and got hot chocolate and timbits. It also turns out that Amy is ok, the pain was just the cist exploding, she is out of comission for the weekend, but I'm happy she's ok. We dropped off Kate and Shawn, when I remembered that I had to meet Sam at the arena! For the record, Sam is the girl I've been admiring for the past couple of months, but she had a boyfriend until recently when she broke up with him on Friday, he was borderline abusive, so she wanted back up... ]]> ~DarkCraftAzLan http://DarkCraftAzLan.deviantart.com/journal/10871592/ http://DarkCraftAzLan.deviantart.com/journal/10871592/ Mon, 27 Nov 2006 18:29:55 PST
I WITHDRAW MY LAST JOURNAL ABOUT THE SNOW! Just when it was all starting to die out, SNOW DAY, record breaking in Abottsford, but here it's only the beginning, it's not like it was in '96 yet, but I say, give it time! It'll happen! I wished we would get a lot of snow, and by god I got it! Just a small update, TEEHEE! WHOO HOO!

HAVE A COLD ONE!
AzLan

]]> ~DarkCraftAzLan http://DarkCraftAzLan.deviantart.com/journal/10861585/ http://DarkCraftAzLan.deviantart.com/journal/10861585/ Sun, 26 Nov 2006 20:36:14 PST
Well folks it is now snowing in this piss ass excuse for a town. It's cold, yesterday it was coming down in toonies (size of Canadian $2 dollar coin for you foriegn people) We never get snow out here so this is wicked! well, it was yesterday, today it started to rain, then the tempature dropped and started snowing in little fluffs of lame, and now it's raining again! YAY! MAKE UP YOUR MIND WEATHER! The only thing I really want is a white christmas again, we haven't had one in ten years! and I don't even remember much of it.

I updated with a little comic, it's pretty much what happened in the snowfall of '96. Out of the blue a blanket of snow, WHAM! Took about 5 minutes tops to get to the top panel to the bottom. It's retarded though, if I walk to the top of my road (a hill) It's probably snowing like mad! yet I walk outside my house it's only slush or rain because the stupid snow warmes up on the way down. A few miles outside the town it's blocking roads, but NOPE not my house, Rain...I love winter. Also my mother decided putting the x-mas tree up now was a good idea; ITS NOT EVEN DECMEMBER!

P.S. If anyone wants something drawn, just ask me by commenting on this journal, thanks

Anyways, have a good one.
AzLan

]]> ~DarkCraftAzLan http://DarkCraftAzLan.deviantart.com/journal/10761052/ http://DarkCraftAzLan.deviantart.com/journal/10761052/ Fri, 17 Nov 2006 22:09:31 PST
Have a good one.
Azlan.

]]> ~DarkCraftAzLan http://DarkCraftAzLan.deviantart.com/journal/10599320/ http://DarkCraftAzLan.deviantart.com/journal/10599320/ Thu, 02 Nov 2006 23:59:21 PST
Lately my art style has mutated. I'm also caught up with school, I'm taking five courses right now, deadlines are harsh, so I doubt I'll be able to submit anything until next semester, I got a spare and easy courses next semester. But for now, I'm sorry but I can't update much.

Have a good one,
AzLan.

]]> ~DarkCraftAzLan http://DarkCraftAzLan.deviantart.com/journal/9994175/ http://DarkCraftAzLan.deviantart.com/journal/9994175/ Wed, 06 Sep 2006 23:38:37 PDT So, ya, if you have a request, comment it in, and I'll try my best to get it in ASAP because I have no idea what to draw, and I need practice.

Also, if you haven't checked already, Hybrid and tsurakashi, the pictures are there. Sorry tsurakashi they aren't zombie squirrels.

Thanks again you two ]]> ~DarkCraftAzLan http://DarkCraftAzLan.deviantart.com/journal/9979847/ http://DarkCraftAzLan.deviantart.com/journal/9979847/ Tue, 05 Sep 2006 17:02:24 PDT I'm going to be taking Biology 11, Film 11, French 11, English 11, and Math Principals 10...again. But next Semester I get a spare! So second semester should be easier then first.

ANYWAYS! Please leave a comment about what to draw, and if you do, PLEASE give me a referrence. Thanks people!

Have a good one,
Azlan. ]]> ~DarkCraftAzLan http://DarkCraftAzLan.deviantart.com/journal/9784468/ http://DarkCraftAzLan.deviantart.com/journal/9784468/ Sat, 19 Aug 2006 16:33:39 PDT

I just saw, I got 100 pageviews! That makes me happy, thanks people! Been playin' a lot of Tales Of Symphonia, so I'll probably do some fanart of Kratos, along with ReGenesis' next page, and concept art. Also, got the DS up an on the job, got 2 new characters and whooped ass in Co-op, DIE HUNTERS! and those damn zombie dogs too. Those school supplies aren't looking very nice right now... I REALLY don't want to go back, I hate school Well it can't be helped. ]]> ~DarkCraftAzLan http://DarkCraftAzLan.deviantart.com/journal/9767482/ http://DarkCraftAzLan.deviantart.com/journal/9767482/ Fri, 18 Aug 2006 03:25:00 PDT That's my que people, see ya later.

- AzLan ]]> ~DarkCraftAzLan http://DarkCraftAzLan.deviantart.com/journal/9609674/ http://DarkCraftAzLan.deviantart.com/journal/9609674/ Sat, 05 Aug 2006 16:36:55 PDT Me and Tianna were supposed to hang out today but she hadn't arrived yet, so I called to see if she had left, now when she came over I was going to ask if she still felt the same way that she did about us before we were going out. Anyways, I called her and we came to a mutual agreement, we were both relieved that we both felt the same way, so i'm single again baby yeah! I feel very lifted, I don't have to put up with Paulina, I'm not in a relationship I didn't really feel for, and now I have enough cash for a DS LITE! I caught a ride up town with my Cousin Joe and my Aunt. We did a lot of shit shopping, (pillows, curtains, etc.) and me and Joe screwed around in the shopping cart almost hitting people going to fast in Walmart and CostCo, it was funny, we were being total retards. Okay, so fast forward about 2 LONG hours of screwing around, scolding afterwards, and the shopping, we finally get to Future Shop, the one place I thought would definately have Barrels of Bargain DS LITES! but no...none, they had a shipment yesterday and in 5 hours they were all gone, ITS FUCKIN NUTS! but understandable its a good console, so that made 3 store with no DS lite. I went to the SUPERSTORE! cause it's just SUPER, T_T And it turns out, the last DS LITE! was just sold, I glared at the kid walking out the store with it, then asked how much they were, turns out SUPERSTORE is less pricey! and they are getting a huge box of em' starting monday! SO I think "WICKED!" so ya on monday im getting my DS lite hopefully, I'll camp outside if I have to! So after the madness, I went back to my place, got my GC and Katie's PS2 and went back to Joe's. Me, joe, and Katie decided, "GAMING DAY!" and Kate i'm sorry if you read this but you seriously suck at first person shooters XD We also had Tyler's X-Box.

Friday, August 04, 2006 7:15
Me and Katie went up sooke, got Area-51, Halo 2, and Pizza! it was so fun! Katie went to sleep and then me and Joe duked it out in Area-51, I beat him 15 to 5 score wise, I really got 17, and he really got 7 but we both got stupid with grenades and killed ourselves each twice. Kicked his ass though. Anyways watched benchwarmers and GOD THAT MOVIE IS PISS YOUR PANTS HALARIOUS! John Heder or however it's spelt, plays a geek a little too well. After that, Joe went to sleep and I watch Comedy Central till I was yelled at to turn it all off and sleep.

Saturday, August 05, 2006 11:43
I woke up today to the noise of, "GET UP GET UP YOU NEED TO LEAVE I NEED TO LOCK UP THE HOUSE, I was rushed out because Joe, Dar(aunt) and Russ(Uncle) were going on a fishing trip. I got my junk and took off, and after that for 2 and a half hours I pressure washed the deck and siding of the house, but thats lame, it's how I tryed to sneak into the yard with out my parents noticing so I could avoid them, I tryed the teachings of Solid Snake, at first I tryed to hug the wall to not be noticed, but my dad was right there pressure washing so that was out. I went to the other side of the house and hopped the fence, it was funny because as I did I snapped a branch and I saw my mom walking near, and I swear I saw a "!" her say "huh? what was that noise?" I hugged the bush closer and then she went upstairs to talk to my dad, I grabbed my bag and got out from the bushes, unfortunately while running to the door, I was caught "WHAT WAS THAT! ALARM!" and my radar went red XD and I was then forced to pressure wash; But it was all fun.
Ya, that was Yesterday and today, except today at 6 im having another video game day with just Kate. Have a good one.

-AzLan ]]> ~DarkCraftAzLan