deviantART: by:DeeAyAich

A Quick Experiment

~DeeAyAich — Wed, 07 Oct 2009 08:05:46 PDT

I don't get as many comments as I'd like to some times, so I'm doing something a little different. Instead of making a journal entry about me and what I'm up to, I'd rather invite anyone and everyone to just leave comments about themselves and what they're up to.

Don't hold back, and don't feel the need to stick to standard prose either--I'll accept comments in the form of haiku or limericks, so long as they're about what you're up to or what you're feeling at the moment!

Cheers, and bonne chance!

And I Thought Classmates Dot Com Would Be Fun!

~DeeAyAich — Thu, 01 Oct 2009 21:20:58 PDT

So, several years ago, I signed on and created a profile. I saw the price for 3, 6 and 12 month subscriptions, and decided to wait for more important bills to be paid off. Hence, I ... still don't have a paid membership.

With the profile I have, though, I've seen and been seen by classmates from 1993. (Gosh, why is that sounding more and more like 1893 every day?)

Also, with the profile I have, I've been able to find out the fellows I knew were cads and broke all the girls' hearts are as unmarried as me. (Yes!!! Justice! ...Partial, at least.)

Today, I decided to see if any of the girls I had crushes on back in the day were registered. Bad move--all married.

With that realization comes all the standard trap. I wonder how I managed to get myself out of so many loops...how did I end up so separated from my class, my generation? Where are the others in my situation? How...How do I "catch up" with the, if not happier, more contented people I grew up with?

Then, a song comes up and gently taps me on the shoulder...A song which someone posted on Youtube, and to which I would link--if the damn thing weren't rendered useless by smilies. Instead, I'll just say it's by Todd Rundgren, and it's called "God Said". It's a gentle song, but one that slaps my face, grabs my collar and snaps me back to my usual ready-to-laugh-at-my-life self.

*A term I use because I'm clinging desperately to my youth.

Why I'm Going to Do It Anyway.

~DeeAyAich — Sun, 16 Aug 2009 10:33:10 PDT

I meant to take the weekend off from writing. Since I have been feeling better through what Ludacris would refer to as "Release Therapy", I've been feeling friskier toward it. Simply put, I can't do satire, but I'm going to attempt it anyway. Nothing feels better than being a smart-ass (or dumbass, depending on your point of view) and *knowing* that's what you're being while you're writing. In short, it lets me be me, and it's helping me not to worry about other people's perceptions.

"I feel so much surer now that everybody else is wrong" as (I think) Todd Rundgren sang on Utopia's album Deface the Music. (Good little Beatles parody album. I recommend it.)

Why I Can't Do Satire

~DeeAyAich — Fri, 14 Aug 2009 09:08:39 PDT

1. The major component is sarcasm. I consider sarcasm to be the witticisms of the witless. Case in point, go back in my journals and find my encounter with that kid from Arizona. He was being sarcastic about me, and I found no wit whatsoever in his original writings about me, nor in his responses to me. (I bet he's wondering, now that he's graduated college, why his career isn't going the way he'd like it to...)

2. It is far too easy. I said that, in a way, in point one. However, I think point two deserves to reiterate it, and to add examples;

--There is a representative in the US Parliament (I know, it's either Senate or Congress, but I don't know which one he's in off the top of my head, and I can't remember the catch-all word for both Houses) named Boehner. I disagree with him on several issues I consider vital. Instead of calling him out on these issues, as a satirist, I could sit back and simply call attention to his name. I could even perhaps add something pithy like "I think I know who's going to replace Bob Dole in a certain set of advertisements in the future...!"
--When John McCain, a Senator who had me seriously thinking about a return to the Republican party at one point (long, looooooong ago) was speaking about the "...Me first, country second crowd in Washington," I was *itching* to satirize that. But I told myself, "Hold on. Either he or a member of his constituency will stand up and accidentally do their own satire." ...Sure enough, here's the health care "debate"! Repeated refrains I'm hearing from "conservatives"---"Sure, this will help the less fortunate. But what about *meeeeee*?!? *I'm* happy with **my** health care plan!"

".......Thank you, and good night", I say without having to do my stand-up routine--as I've thought about attempting before. I *won't* do anything I consider too easy. So, how am I going to get up on stage to make fun of people who make fun of themselves?

Oh, I suppose I could join ranks with Trey Parker and Matt Stone, or others who have the philosophy, "For some reason, you just can't make fun of liberals in this country." ....But, statements like that make them *ripe* targets for my sat-*ire*. "Yeah? Sez who? I've been a liberal all my life, and had to flee the Republican sphere before I could even vote because those people 'couldn't' (but *did*, you morons) make fun of me."

And another thing--I'm not the slightest bit happy calling people "morons". Then again, I suppose it's the verbal equivalent of the swift kick in the tail that would get their attention....and I wouldn't be happy doing that, either. Besides, people get more upset at you for trying to get their attention than at the impending disaster you're trying to call to their attention. "Look, Trey, Matt et. al....Liberals ain't the problem in this country, and as I heard you imply on South Park, not even 'Ultra-' (whatever that means) '-Liberals' are in favor of this ongoing drug war. Are you making satire, or are you trying to make 'Libertarians' (whatever *they* are) look utterly stupid?" ...That would make them more upset at me than trying to tell them that their beloved "Free Market" is at the mercy of not-so-benevolent people who don't care about our civil liberties in the slightest. Trust me on this--I don't think Socialism will change that, either. Those not-so-benevolent people would get out of the free market and worm their way into government programs--and our civil liberties would remain threatened.

We have to be vigilant, and we can't limit the scope of our satire. And *that* will make it too hard. I won't do anything that's too hard, either.

All Joking Aside....Well, At Least Most of It.

~DeeAyAich — Thu, 13 Aug 2009 13:23:47 PDT

I went to Senator McConnell's office today and spoke with his office manager. The meeting went *swimmingly* well. (For those needing to use translation services, that last sentence actually means, "The meeting was very cordial and rational.") The manager told me that this topic is "bringing people out of the woodwork". It appears that most of us are what I've heard called "middle-of-the-road". Today, I learned that I can use the word "us" when referring to the "middle of the road" in politics. I am reluctant to take that label even, as the likes of Lou Dobbs and Bill O'Reilly claim to speak for those folks--and I disagree with them on just about every position they have.

I gave her that quote I overheard on the news about how someone was concerned that government was getting into God's decisions on life and death. I told her in my opinion that while the statement the protester made was indeed true, governments since their implementation have been muscling in on God's territory--it's nothing new. I backed that up by telling her that governments have declarations of war (which I added to her that I do not oppose) and they have death penalties (which I also added that I do not oppose--besides, a heinous enough crime deserves a heinous punishment. Death is death, and it's never a good thing, but we ultimately have no way around it). (At this revelation, she raised her eyebrows. I told her that I try not to accept labels from others, but I consider myself liberal. I reached that decision by reading some John Locke, but departing with him on limiting the concept of Liberty to white, land-owning Christian males. I figure, I said, that if one has a brain and a pulse, one has a birthright to liberty--property ownership, gender and religion aside.)

I told her I am not afraid of my taxes being raised if this passes--just so long as I can get health care and get into the position to pay taxes once again. I have heard, I told her, self-professed conservatives telling liberals to put their money where their mouths are. I am one who does. At every job I've ever held, I said, I marked that little line on the W-2 that says "Any additional amount you wish to be withheld," with either the number 5 or 10. I am willing to chip it in voluntarily, because I have grandparents in retirement, and I want to make sure they're funded. Not just my grandparents, though--yours and everyone's. I like to think that extra 5 or 10 dollars I pitched in helped train soldiers, too--helped with their care when they were injured, and helped protect them when they went into battle.

All this I told her, and I told her about Lewis Black's comment about Mitch McConnell's appearance on Meet the Press. The Senator related a story of a friend of his had a friend in Canada who had to die because the province's government decided the fellow was too old to support. She had never heard of Lewis Black before, and I told her that he is an angry comedian who said, "A friend of a friend? That's not even enough to substantiate an urban legend." My telling her this further released the tension I sensed, and she said, "That's actually fair." It appears Senator McConnell would agree with the assessment. She told me the Senator is a very deliberating man who keeps his office walls covered with every political cartoon about him--both positive and negative, as he has a sense of humor about himself. I told her that I did not envy the Senator's position as a public servant, and that I realized that with cameras on you and limited time to speak, you don't always get to be as eloquent as you would like to be.

I am now feeling the hope that the scoffing people are mocking "Obamatons" for. Hard nosed scoffers are right--no president can bring hope. However, I found that hope by merely being an individual reaching out to a Senator who is (supposedly) in opposition to the party I joined. To close with one more thing I told the office manager, I don't know how *independent* my mind is. I just know that it's a curious one--and it impels me to look into anything I hear anyone saying. To me, that is far more important than the bragging right of independence.

Entering the Elephant's Den

~DeeAyAich — Wed, 12 Aug 2009 08:03:50 PDT

I'm sure some of you read my entry a couple of days ago. Well, it was mostly a dark humor piece. (So, I made the Pink Floyd references about as obvious as I possibly could--hopefully without violating copyrights. Did you catch the Arlen Specter joke?) But, I have this philosophy that all good humor, dark or otherwise, is based loosely on truth. Kinda like those town hall meetings, but not quite as loose.

The truths in the "Money. It's a Hit." entry are that I did remember the CFPR founder from some kind of testimony broadcast back in '87. I don't remember his 14 indictments on Medicare fraud, but they're a matter of public record these days--I just looked his name up and found them. I have also been paying more attention than I should to things that upset me on profound levels. That's true as well. Anything not overtly true is exaggerated (only *slightly*) for minimal comedic effect. (Or, is that "affect"? All I know is I won't use "impact" in sentences like that one.)

So, after seeing the people who were inadvertently funny on TV opposing health care, I have decided to meet with my senator (the one seen on Meet the Press talking about a "....friend down in Florida who had a friend up in Canada....") to discuss *my* view on things. Ladies and gentlemen, when *I* get pulled this far into a political debate, it's big. I mean, *real* big. I've spent all of my adult life trying to avoid conversations with politicians, and here I am going to see one in his very own office. Daaaayyyumn.

Money. It's a Hit.

~DeeAyAich — Mon, 10 Aug 2009 17:43:42 PDT

So, really. Don't give me any do goody-good bullshit. I'm watching. I'm listening. It's all I can do these days. I'd rather be distracted. Trust me on that. I'd love to have gone to work this morning and still be there now. I can't. I'm injured. In the course of the treatment I've been begging and borrowing to afford (I refuse to steal), I've discovered two things--One, I have arthritis in my knees. That's right. Both knees. And two, since I've been stuck unable to afford treatment for so long, unable to move about like I once did, the weight I tried to lose stayed on--and I developed full blown diabetes. Great. Two more medical conditions I can not afford, and two conditions that keep me away from the only kinds of work I've had since I was a teenager--retail, or construction. As poorly as I'm getting around these days, finishing my education is going to be quite a challenge, too. So much for that office job (with the occasional field work).

I sit around between my weekly physical therapy appointments (and my at-home upkeep sessions) watching whatever anyone else has turned on. To my chagrin, news is going 14 hours a day around here. I hear about freed journalists. I see pictures of the Capital complex. I hear, and I shudder while listening to, speeches. And monologues..."reports", if you will.

I see commercials about "conservatives" for patients' "rights". I know the face of the guy who founded the group. And for some profoundly hard to understand reason to me, the guy actually has the nerve to show his face in public.

"Hey...When I was 13 years old, weren't you the head of the HMO my parents belonged to? Or, didn't your company acquire it? Also, didn't you, when I was a tad closer to 14, have to testify before Congress about your company's fundamentally flawed billing practices for Medicare? Were you not also at least indicted on 14 counts (one for every year of my life up to that point) on Medicare fraud? And, now, you come out pretending to be concerned about my rights as a patient? How dare you insult me, sir. I might have been young, but I remember the uproar you caused for my family--and untold numbers of others'. And I know you're blocking something that could benefit me in my darkest hour of need--by painting your opponents in your damned color scheme."

That's right. It's a gas. Grab that cash with both hands, and maybe you'll have enough to get through the clinic's door.

Hah. There has also been a newly former governor babbling lately. Something about her parents and her disabled child having to face our President's "death panels".

Get away. Is that the evil we're all about to face these days?

It wasn't this President's Single Payer Plan panel that told me a couple of years ago that, "You'll pay 900 dollars this year, then turn around and pay another 900 dollars to re-enroll next year before we cover your pre-existing high blood pressure. Sure, you need the drugs right now, and you'll be forced to pay full price for them while you're paying your monthly dues. Did we mention on top of that 1800, you'll be out monthly fees? Well, you will." Correct me if I'm wrong, but wasn't that a private insurance company telling me something along those lines? Does the word "insurance" apply, or should it be pronounced as one of my great-great-great uncles up in Cicero, Illinois pronounced it? (He was Irish, and from a suburb of Chicago...And, yes. He was in direct competition with Al Capone.)

I overheard one thing too many on this debate. I heard some "ordinary person", who opposes our current push for reform. "This isn't about health care. This is about fighting Socialism." ....No it isn't. It's about money--yours and mine--and the folks who keep sucking it out of us in new, creative ways. It's about how they're playing us for saps, and raising any specter they can (apparently, except for Arlen) to keep us scared and distracted, while more generations of schmucks like me get sick, need help, give them money hand over fist....and are forced to wade through a bunch of unregulated, and decreasingly regulated nonsense.

Money. So they say. Shell it out, and maybe your doctor your insurance company will pay. Or maybe not...and you're out of luck. And health.

Phishing Scam

~DeeAyAich — Fri, 06 Feb 2009 18:30:26 PST

I've gotten some odd comments posted on my front page. Something about my picture being online, or recommending some "funny" site to me. Both links went to Blogger, and both were instantly blocked in my Google Chrome browser.

The thing is, I have a Blogger account. I used my account to report every link as they turned up. Hopefully, whoever is really up to this BS will get caught, filleted and fed to some desperately starving members of the Animal Kingdom. (H. Sapiens included.)

Gonna Be Off for a While (Maybe)

~DeeAyAich — Tue, 27 Jan 2009 16:12:52 PST

I don't know when, and I don't know for how long. The last time we had an ice storm here, the electricity went out with a few hours' warning, and it stayed out for about ten days. I've heard those warnings again tonight: I can step outside and hear the trees creaking. Everything's coated, and it's getting thicker by the minute.

So, if you all don't see me for a while, you'll know why!

Addendum to Jan 10, 2009

~DeeAyAich — Sun, 11 Jan 2009 10:41:44 PST

This is originally intended as a reply to , but I lost control.

Wernicke's Aphasia was the fourth option! (I'd be tempted to call the entire blog a "Word Salad with Schizo-croutons and Wild Ranch Dressing", but that's just a little too flippant.) Another reason I left aphasia off as a possibility is that this blog had several contributors...all with similar posts!

For example, the one I posted in my journal is from "Graham". The following one is from "Tilly";

"Puyallup river flooding, while the book's facility was treated and eschewed for another local resources, the film of the government ranked."

Here are the date and time stamps from a statistical sampling of the site. (Link not included, just in case it's a "dangerous" site. I have Spybot Search and Destroy Resident running on this computer. My computer's a piece of junk, so I don't care if it crashes permanently. Since I don't store any e-mail addresses in either my Thunderbird or Outlook Express address books, I am confident I won't infect my friends' computers with any viruses my scanning software misses.)

"Posted on 02:28 January 10, 2009 by Louie"

"Posted on 02:28 January 10, 2009 by Sylvia"

"Posted on 02:28 January 10, 2009 by Micky"
(Called "Damages TV Show", and is the most disturbing..."damages tv show, nightline, bring the press, hannity & colmes and all of the demand end people." Alan Colmes resigned, but I don't expect anyone to "...demand end people" because of it!)

"Posted on 02:28 January 10, 2009 by Leila" (And "Leila" chose to...get this!...write about a "Porn Industry Bailout"!)

"Posted on 02:28 January 10, 2009 by Agnes"

I intended to keep posting time stamps until I found one from a different moment and a previously listed author. I give up!

If you're into Home Star Runner, Homsar is the character this site brought to my mind. Only difference is, Homsar is more coherent. See for yourself! [link]

....................................................
I ... am ... compelled ... to write one ... more long-winded thing!
From Leila's "Porn Industry Bailout";
"Statue example passage seed can convey you cause your drug product by talking an everything no. lower than the television on your informal years. Raising girl conservatives ridiculed every four soldiers, the $62 past led by trafficgauge offers on institution about wheatgrass rulings reported by location and other men to broaden where members have retired to a mind."

Found This, But Forgot What I Was Looking For!

~DeeAyAich — Sat, 10 Jan 2009 18:49:44 PST

I might have been looking for updates on Patrick Swayze's condition. (My dad had pancreatic cancer in 1988, and a friend of his died of it in 2007. I got to see both events unfold...)

What I found baffled, confused, bemused, and quite possibly entertained me. It had the unexpected effect of making me forget (only for a moment) just what terrible pain Patrick is going to face in the coming weeks or months.

Here's what I found in the first paragraph. I had to read it several times to make sure I wasn't imagining things;

"A content of 24,000 estimated bats of route and 132 double historians of behaviour were inspired from the organization. The two entrants support an top broadcast replay on thanksgiving that is one of the oldest codefendants in brief interchangeable feature quarterback. how old is patrick swayze."

Is this a paragraph translated by machine into English, or is it written by a native speaker with random words to pull in search engine traffic? (Third option, possibly....Is it written by a machine, programmed by a native speaker, to fool search engines?!?)

The world may never know!

.....But if you do, would you tell me?!?

Since We Know the Difference is Lipstick ...

~DeeAyAich — Tue, 09 Sep 2008 17:35:26 PDT

Would the campaign song be Pink Floyd's "Dogs" this cycle?

.......
You gotta strike when the moment is right without thinking
And after a while, you can work on points for style
Like the club tie, and the firm handshake
A certain look in the eye and an easy smile
You have to be trusted by the people that you lie to
So that when they turn their backs on you
You'll get the chance to put the knife in
.......

Come to think of it, I'm going to backdate that as the theme to every campaign season I can remember; from '84 to '08.

Gone Vegetarian ... Again.

~DeeAyAich — Sun, 24 Aug 2008 14:50:29 PDT

Since I know I'm going to get the knocks for it, hell no it's not a political statement. It's a health one.
After spending some time reading labels and assessing my overall health, I've decided to go off meat (at least as a regular meal entry). I'll eat meat as often as my hunter/gatherer ancestors did, only I suppose I'll have to see if Gary Gygax developed a "Successful Hunt" table before he died. I suppose I'll have to search for my 20 sided dice, now....
As a part of this diet change, I've decided to restrict much of the ultra-refined stuff, because it manages to squeeze a lot of calories into some very small servings. (Imagine 1 serving of potato chips having the same number of calories as TEN servings of carrots! I can easily hold five servings of either ... but ten servings of carrots is a physical impossibility--at least for me!)
This is the third day of it. All ready, I feel as if my head is starting to clear up--thinking has become easier. I don't know why, but that is usually the first thing I notice when I do this diet.

Life is Worth Losing

~DeeAyAich — Mon, 23 Jun 2008 09:41:02 PDT

*Warning: Most quotes in this post are copied from memory, and as such are likely half-assed imitations of the originals. As always, the writer recommends all readers question authority and try to get their answers from the source, and not some third-rate, possible crackpot like me.

Man, I wish I was into younger celebrities. Reporting the deaths of my favorite ones is a chore.
Only on two occasions have I smiled devilishly about the passing of some of my favorite figures. One was William Gaines, founder of Tales Calculated to Drive You MAD (or just plain MAD for those of us too young to remember the 1950s). The last line of his obituary actually had me laughing ... "No matter who you are, there's someone out to screw you."

This time, it's a little different. The laughter comes more darkly. Maybe it was because I was OK with only losing one subversive in my lifetime, but to lose the man who said, "Libertarianism is just another phoney-baloney political philosophy that makes people think they're above it all" is a bit too much. I'm laughing, still, remembering all the stuff he said about how the whole "sanctity of life" sentiment was "bullshit", and how he said he loved hearing about great big groups of people being struck by tragedy--and how he didn't change his tune after September 2001.
It's actually kind of soothing. George Carlin didn't change his tune after what some people believe was a day that changed our nation forever. It leads me to believe that George hasn't changed his thinking on the Sanctity of Life, even after losing his own. That implies continuity to me. And that's the kind of bullshit that helps me make it through my day.

Thanks, George, for teaching me that I'm susceptible to being full of shit.

Just one question, though. To other George Carlin fans out there--how would you all think he'd like for us to celebrate his life and "passing"?

"Hey! I didn't pass away! I fuckin' died!"
---George Carlin (Ok, he didn't say that. But, I bet those could've easily been his last words.)

"Frisbeetarianism is the belief that when you die, your soul goes up on the roof and gets stuck."
---George Carlin (Really his, according to [link])

Quick Election Opinion Piece

~DeeAyAich — Sat, 31 May 2008 12:15:23 PDT

Today, I had one person too many tell me they wouldn't vote for Obama if he were nominated because he is a black Muslim. To let the whole country know here and now; So long as a candidate is serious in upholding and defending the spirit and principles of the Constitution, I will vote for that candidate even if it is a purple People Eater*.

"Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances."

Hmm. First Amendment seems pretty airtight to me. If you're allowed to practice any religion here, wouldn't it make sense to allow for someone who doesn't practice a majority religion a chance to compete for your vote? I'm probably in the minority in my region (of the country or world, take your pick) , but I'll allow for the possibility that people of different faiths are really more concerned with survival than pushing their faith on an unreceptive public.

*Ah, come on! What do you think Communion Wafers are?!?

Two Months' Recovery

~DeeAyAich — Mon, 21 Apr 2008 15:54:23 PDT

How do I sum this up quickly?

...I'll just try.

On February 27th, we had our last ice storm. It wasn't bad enough for my college to call off, so I attempted to go. I made it half-way down my inclined driveway before slipping, and falling forward. I landed on my left knee, and rolled awkwardly forward and to the left. I heard nothing pop, but I felt it.

The pain was intense enough for me to urge my mom to call an ambulance. In the emergency room I got plenty of X-rays, but since I had no insurance, there was no MRI done. Everything from there was guess work, but I was told I had a contusion in my thigh, and a possible sprain in my knee. (Found out later that the contusion was correct, but the "possible" sprain in my knee was not only a definite sprain, it was a double one: a sprained lateral collateral ligament, and pre-patillar bursitis. As soon as one let up, I noticed the pain of the other.)

As such, I spent the rest of February and a good part of March immobile, and up to now restricted to moving around the house. I had to withdraw from classes, again with emergency medical permission. This was just not a year to get much done, academically.

But, here's to a better year next year, eh?

(And, -- your commentary on the Chinese having the same word for "crisis" and "opportunity" couldn't have been more timely! I've actually been contemplating that for the past two months!)

He Slimed ... Uhm... She Tagged Me

~DeeAyAich — Tue, 12 Feb 2008 16:48:14 PST

tagged me, and I don't know how long ago it was. I apologize to her by saying that this is the first tagging to which I've ever responded.

The rules:
1. Post these rules.
2. Each person tagged must post 8 random (hopefully interesting) facts about themselves.
3. Tags should write a journal of these facts.
4. At the end of the post 8 more bloggers are tagged and named.
5. Go to their page and leave a comment telling them they're tagged.

All right, here goes.

1. Before I started college, I thought about becoming a professional writer/actor. (Family talked me out of it, then later asked, "Why didn't you go on writing and acting? You were sooo good at it!"
2. I have been given pause about raising a family of my own, even though at one time I wanted to be a family man. (It might have to do with my inability to process and/or pass on mixed messages.)
3. I entered college originally as a physics major. I blew my mind out on that, and wound up dropping out for nearly twelve years.
4. I don't give a rat's ass about anonymity on the internet. It's a fallacy anyway. Instead of being paranoid, I carry on like the idiotic, semi-evolved simian I believe I am (and the rest of humanity is)!
5. I can say things like the last sentence and still come across like a nice guy. Beats me how that happens.
6. I love cartoons, and I don't want to be taken seriously. I do, however, wish to be more dependable.
7. I haven't been on a date in 5 years. I want to make sure the "next one" isn't a rebound.
8. I participated in Valentine's Day (bought chocolates for someone I admire) for the first time in 6 years today. Like I said: I want to make sure the "next one" isn't a rebound!

That does it. Since I couldn't honestly tell anyone which of my friends have been tagged, I'll put them on the honor system. Would eight, and only eight, of you tag yourselves and tell me when you've done your answers? Plskthnx

...Oh, I guess that leads to #9!

9. I've recently discovered LOLcats. Cute, funny, and I can't believe I love that site as much as I do. (...Seeing as this time last year I would've contemplated suicide much sooner than using a web-head phrase like "plskthnx" in anything I wrote....)

This Is Some Wild Stuff!

~DeeAyAich — Thu, 08 Nov 2007 19:08:22 PST

Just follow the link. I can't add anything more to this story, other than to say, "It really pays to understand chemistry!"

[link]

A FollowUpdate

~DeeAyAich — Wed, 31 Oct 2007 07:44:47 PDT

I had another full blown wheezing attack Monday, even though I had taken my nebulizer treatment only a few hours earlier. After that, it finally sank in; my condition isn't under control, and I need to withdraw from school before the asthma does more damage to my academics than it has done to me.

To : I checked into taking incompletes, too. I already know three of my four instructors won't go for it. It's difficult to finish my geology and chemistry labs between semesters, and learning Chinese on my own would be nearly impossible. It's best for me to just re-enroll in these classes later. (That adds another semester onto my career, but I really don't mind that at all.)

To : Thanks a lot for the encouragement. It takes a while for me to realize things like "There's no dishonor in taking a medical break..."
It also took me a while to realize that my type of asthma can be deadly. Like I hinted before, I grew up feeling like this; I thought it was just another rough season to get through. To illustrate that point, during my worst attack this year, I walked three blocks from my classroom building to my doctor's office--after I had turned down a friend's offer to walk with me. (I didn't want him to miss class on my account. After a block and a half, I was wishing I had someone to walk with me.)

A Quick Update

~DeeAyAich — Sat, 27 Oct 2007 20:00:35 PDT

I'm not much for apologies, especially when talking about updates to online journals. I figure that I'm not a celebrity, very few people care whether I update or not, and to those who do care about updates--well, here's one now.

I've been down-for-the-count a lot lately. That's not a an admission of depression. Not only have I been enjoying myself as much as I can, I've been enjoying myself a little more than usual. The mental states one can achieve while oxygen deprived are quite marvelous.

The down side of that; I've finally had an asthma attack and knew it was an asthma attack. For the past thirty years, I've had repeated bouts of respiratory ailments, ranging from a persistent cough to bronchitis to bed-ridden pneumonia. The root of that has been exposed, and I'm now an inhaler-carrying member of the Asthmatics of America. (Well, inhaler-carrying, steroid snorting, nebulizer using ... you get the point.)

My grades are suffering. I've missed a lot (there is one instructor who put "no make-up exams or assignments at all" in her syllabus -- I'll be seeing an ombud about that, trust me), but when I've been well enough to attend class, it has reflected in the grades I've received.

I'm not going down without a fight this time. The last time my grades got this low, I freaked out and walked away from school for 13 years.

Never Again.

A Break in the Weather, a Break in the Silence

~DeeAyAich — Tue, 19 Jun 2007 13:45:07 PDT

All right, I'm back. I'm bored of being bored now! It took a little longer to get over my aversion to writing--and the need to be "lazy" after the semester was finished.

It's finally raining today. It would have been hard for me to imagine had I not seen it; the summers in Kentucky getting so dry that a Dust Bowl is becoming possible. One stiff, sustained wind an my home state looks like Kansas and Oklahoma did back in the '30s. Rainfall is still 12 inches short of normal in most places around Lexington.

I know people around the country and the world think of rolling, green pastures where horses run and romp when they think of Fayette County Kentucky. It's mostly brown these days. And the horses--they're eating hay from a crop that was damaged by a late season frost this year.

As far as this rain goes...I think I'm going to go outside and enjoy it. It's been a long time since I've had the opportunity to do that....

Scooby Doo Creator Dies at 81

~DeeAyAich — Tue, 09 Jan 2007 08:54:16 PST

Looks like I'm the one to break this news to my group.

[link]

I have nothing more to say.

One and a Half Finals Down, Three and a Half to Go

~DeeAyAich — Wed, 06 Dec 2006 17:08:12 PST

I had my geology lab final this past Monday. The only sticking points I had on it were map reading and drawing...Yes, I had to be able to read and draw topo-maps. Never done it before, but I know with more practice, it'll be easier. I can darn near look at those squiggly lines and see landforms in them all ready.

I just got home from taking the oral part of my Chinese final. We had to read a paragraph fluently, and we were allowed to do something I didn't know was allowed; I could have written the paragraph out in Pinyin where the letter 'c' is pronounced as in 'cats'--the ts in 'cats'! (Hey, that's how our textbook explained it. I would have chosen a word that didn't have one of the usual English pronunciations, but that's just me.)

I pulled it off. According to my teacher, I made myself understood. Aaaand I. Got. Full. Credit.

The written part of Chinese is next Monday. I hope I can write every character I can read....

Geology lecture and Japanese geography finals are next week as well.

****Edit****
Just realized that 1.5 and 3.5 is 5. I only have four classes this semester. This does not bode well for my Math final...

Reflections on September.

~DeeAyAich — Mon, 11 Sep 2006 17:32:44 PDT

"There are many among us who deserve death. There are many who are dead who deserve life. Can you give it to them, Frodo? Be not so swift to take what is not yours to give, for even the wisest cannot see all ends."

Gandalf the Grey
from The Lord of the Rings.

Problem Solved

~DeeAyAich — Sat, 26 Aug 2006 08:03:22 PDT

Got a 160 Gb external drive yesterday. I hope this relieves the slowness and freeze-ups, but I'm not holding my breath. At the very least, I now have a place to stash all my important files in case I decide to take a mallet to the tower one day.

Could Someone Explain...

~DeeAyAich — Wed, 12 Jul 2006 19:22:11 PDT

The new thing that shows up when I click the submit button? I haven't posted any pieces since November of last year, and there's some sort of new agreement. I'm damned leery of new contracts popping up out of nowhere.

The real question is: should I post this newest piece somewhere else and not worry about dA anymore?

All Worked Up ... Over Nothing

~DeeAyAich — Tue, 20 Jun 2006 12:04:03 PDT

Have you ever really worried yourself over something that shouldn't have worried you? Hell, that's not even a rhetorical question; I know you all have done it. I just got through worrying about my newest nothing today.

I finally found out the deal on my grades--the school doesn't mail them out anymore. Hell of a thing to find out when you're worrying about dropping your GPA below acceptable levels...

But I finally found them, online no less, and I laid my fears to rest. I managed to pull a miracle out of thin air--I got a B in my General Chemistry 2 lecture and a D in the Gen. Chem. Lab. How I managed to do that, I don't know. (I feel like too much of an idiot to have gotten a 2.8 GPA this semester...)

Third Midterm Blues

~DeeAyAich — Thu, 30 Mar 2006 20:27:36 PST

Hey, Folks!

I've not dropped of the face of the Earth...I've just headed into a tougher semester than I ever expected (and I've been told it gets tougher from here)! I've just finished the second test in my Chemistry Lab. That class has been a bear. It's taking most of my mental energy to keep up with just that lab...

Anyway, I've logged in here for the first time in a while today and I have 74 deviations/hot topics/journals waiting for me to read. I've skimmed through the deviations, and I have to say I've seen some good ideas and odd combinations. Keep it up, gang! I'm lovin' it!

Haven't had a chance to look over the journals. I'll try to come around to comment, but don't expect much 'til summer. (A Chem Lab and a Chem Lecture in one semester is a lot more taxing than I was expecting ........)

Expanding Music Collection

~DeeAyAich — Sun, 19 Feb 2006 13:27:54 PST

I've started listening to my Classical music CD collection while I study. That collection is limited to a single Golden Vienna Master Series CD. It has Mozart's K 622 in A major (clarinet concerto) and K 191 in B flat major (bassoon concerto). I've heard this one so many times I know it by heart, and I like it more each time I hear it.

But, here's the thing; I know I will still wear myself out on this recording. I was wondering if anyone out there could recommend anything I can add to my rotation based on my liking of Mozart. (Other than more Mozart CDs; I could have come up with that on my own!)

Can anyone advise?

Expanding Music Collection

~DeeAyAich — Sun, 19 Feb 2006 13:27:44 PST

Brain Drain

~DeeAyAich — Tue, 31 Jan 2006 20:03:27 PST

I miss updating this journal. Really, I do. But I've been keeping myself busy, and I have been writing a lot--especially for school.

I don't know if I could say that I've been missing that all along (school writing, that is), but now that I'm back into it I know I've been missing it. It's quite entertaining even if it is taxing. You get an insight on what it takes to build yourself up as a writer if you're in an 'accelerated foundational course'.

One thing I never expected to be asked to write about was (wait for it!) advertising. Yes, advertising. I've stayed away from that subject for good reason--I don't have an opinion about it. Now I can either do a 5,000 word essay on it, or sum up my position in two words--no comment. But I need 1250 words. So, somewhere between the two words of my real position and the extra 4,998 words that I could use to make my essay a drudgery lies the challenge of making 1250 words interesting. Making it mean "no comment" all while earning an 'A' in a class that generally grants a 'C' to an essay that meets all the criteria for good writing will be a challenge.

I might be up for that challenge, and I might not; I'm not sure. I'll find out Thursday.

***Bonus for My dA Pals!***

The topic of that first English paper I've written in 13 years is "What It Takes to Be a Man". It's a look at the changing use of male models in advertising and the way it has effected our culture's outlook on manhood. I look around seeing men still being men no matter what a kind of model shows up in Calvin Klein, so I'm stuck. But it's fun being stuck and finding out that you really do have something to say on a subject such as this! (This subject being, to illucidate further, the more feminine traits showing up in male models--passivity, S-curve stances and longing, puppy dog gazes ... that sort of thing. And, yes, I really have no comment on the matter! Whatever you guys want to do is fine with me. Now, wake me when something matters.)

Happy New Year to One and All

~DeeAyAich — Sat, 31 Dec 2005 22:13:50 PST

Good 2006, everyone. Maybe I'll see you all online tomorrow?

Good night, and good luck!

Grades Are In

~DeeAyAich — Mon, 19 Dec 2005 16:50:07 PST

Psychology -- A

Public Speaking -- C

Geology -- A

And the one that had me biting my fingernails ... the one where I had a 30 point drop from test 2 to test 3:
Chemistry -- A

I don't know what to think. I don't know what to do.

All I fell like doing is what a character from Futurama did when he first found out his 93 cent savings account had made him a millionaire while he was frozen for a thousand years....

(His eye twitched, he started foaming at the mouth, then he passed out. It's taking a lot of control to keep that from happening.)

Acid Redux Department

~DeeAyAich — Sat, 12 Nov 2005 15:30:06 PST

Ok, I've had a chance to settle down today and take stock of my situation. In other words, I've gone into problem solving mode.

Step One was already done:

I'm taking care of my nearly non-existant social life (the entirety of its existence is either here, or at the Velma forum on Yahoo) and my money problems by hawking things from Avon's men's catalog. I'll get out, meet and greet people, sell some stuff and possibly earn commissions--thus easing my broke-ness.

Step Three:

Remind myself that I still have trouble with arithmetic.

Step Two:

Research scholarship opportunities for non-traditional students ... and students with disabilities. (I don't remember if I've never "come out" before on this journal, but I've got Attention Deficit Disorder and a mild case of dyslexia. I fight very hard against both disorders, so a lot of people don't believe I have them.)

Step Four:

Ask my friends here to drop me a note if they hear of any such nontrad/LD Scholarships, or hear of any grants from corporations willing to take a risk on folks like me.

Step Five:

Find some way to get involved with my community.
I'm thinking about volunteering at the local children's museum, hopefully to get involved with any displays involving geology. That way, I'll be interacting with people who are into the same sorts of things I'm into, and perhaps rubbing elbows with a future employer.

Acid Reflux Department

~DeeAyAich — Sat, 12 Nov 2005 09:54:07 PST

Here's what it's come down to...

I'm in school, taking a full course load. I'm doing well--pulling in at least a 3.0 this semester. But, I'm unemployed, and have nearly drained my retirement account. The last job fired me under circumstances I believe to have been very wrong, but I don't know of a lawyer I can turn to in order to help make that situation right. I have no source of income, I'm behind a month on a current car payment, and a car I owned seven years ago has come back to haunt me in the form of an attorney's office down in Texas threatening to take me to court if I don't cut them a check for $1,020.74. That's going to take away all my savings, but at least I'll have avoided a nice little lawsuit against me. Top this all off with my mother's "advice" to not send the check ... because I can be "thrown in jail" for writing a cold check.

Forget that I've already told her several times that the person at the attorney's office said it was OK to write a check to send to them while I wait for the retirement money to come in. Of course, my mom keeps forgetting little details like that. I guarantee you that if she brings it up again--I never turn to her for advice--she'll have forgotten that the attorney told me to write that cold check! Update....she just approached me telling me to write a letter explaining to that attorney's office that I need the money I'm sending them for transportation and to pay on my current car. She wants me to tell them to tear that check up....She, of course, spoke her piece and walked away before I could say anything. She said that it's not fair what the attorney is doing. No fooling. It isn't fair what my last job did to me either, and where was the advice then? Where was the name of a lawyer I could turn to when I needed it? She supplied a name to a friend of the family when that person was going through a similar problem...not disability discrimination, but still. She was in that person's corner, and not nagging them ... not speaking her piece, then denying that other person's input.

I'm tired of dealing with my life alone. That's how I feel every time I get unsolicited "advice" from my mom. I feel even more alone than I did before she talked to me. ...If I tell her I don't want to talk, then I'm the bastard....

I announced my intention to join up with a friend at school to sell stuff from a catalog. Mom, of course, tried to talk me out of it. I was simply telling her what I was going to do--and she immediately started pointing out the downside to it. Well, I'm meeting tomorrow with that friend, who was gracious enough to get me started without my having to buy that first pack of samples (it's Avon, so I'm pretty sure it's a reputable outfit). This friend is going to get me started with that--I'm going to be pitching stuff from the new men's catalog, of course, but I know that a lot of guys have to shop for their ladies ... so, I'll have both catalogs on me.

Mom wanted me to know that it would take time away from my studies. No fooling. She then recommended that I look into getting a regular job at about 20 or so hours a week....So, a catalog sales job, where I set the hours and pace is going to take time away from my studies, and a "regular job" where someone else sets the hours won't? I don't get it. I'd prefer to set my own hours, be responsible for my own sales, and be "forced" to go out and be sociable to make those sales. So, I'm doing it anyway.

I've let Mom worry me enough about my dire financial situation. I'm going to calm down and get back to homework. That's my way out. Once I get that degree, I'll get a starting position on a payscale that is some multiple of two greater than all of my former jobs put together. I'll never accept anymore "help" from Mom again. Last time I got her help, I got a car worth $8,000, and immediate reminders of what would happen if I couldn't make the payment -- at a time when I had a job and could afford to make the payments anyway.

Before the purchase of that car, I tried to talk her into signing a personal loan for just enough to get a reasonably running used car--$1500 or less. Nope. I can't believe I caved in and went for that more expensive car. It could have been worse...she talked me into test driving a $12,000 dollar car, which I did indeed think was a good car--but I'm more a utilitarian when it comes to automobiles. The one I have now is more than I needed.

Now, she's worried and pissed that she's going to be saddled with paying what's left for my car--or that I'll be stuck paying on a car I won't have much longer. God, I'm tired of hearing about that.

Bad News, Good News

~DeeAyAich — Fri, 11 Nov 2005 14:25:10 PST

Hey, everyone!

For those of you who knew about the tests I went through in the past two days, I have an update. I got the chemistry test grade back--hence the bad news/good news title to this journal.

The bad news is that I made a 56 on it. The good news is ... I scored just one point below the average for all the sections of Chem 105. (I kept asking myself, "How could I go from an 88 on the first exam to a 92 on the second one to a 56 on the third?")

The material wasn't too terribly tough--it was just scattered over a very wide array of processes. Each chapter we studied on this test was almost totally unrelated to the one before it. It went from molecular geometry to stoicheometry to acid-base reactions to oxidation numbers. Some sections required mathematics, some didn't. The sections that didn't require mathematics required us to memorize tables. But, it's like I said -- class average was 57. The professor says that he doesn't see how it won't have a curve applied to it.

I'm still afloat, apparently! (Not to mention, on my way to actually earning the tag "Nerd" that people slapped on me twenty years ago....)

A Question I Couldn't Answer

~DeeAyAich — Tue, 13 Sep 2005 08:48:52 PDT

Someone once said that they admired anyone who could accomplish anything with graphite or charcoal. To that person, I say that I'm astonished that I did anything at all with graphite and charcoal.

While cruising through a few deviations, I noticed a daily deviation of Gandalf called "A wizard is never late." I read through the comments and found one by the artist. After reading it, I'll be trying some of the techniques mentioned in it;

Thanks for the nice comments. I have a fairly rigid technique with charcoal. I draw the charcoal areas first from left to right (I'm right handed) and place a clean piece of A4 paper under my wrist to stop any smudging while drawing. After laying down a large area, I always blow or vacuum the remaining dust away from the pic (very messy!) to minimise further smudging. The fine dust bits that stick to the paper can be removed with an eraser afterwards. Once the charcoal areas are complete and the lines sharp, I fix them with normal hairspray which is just as good as fixative and about $50 per bottle cheaper! Once it's dry (half an hour in the sun) you don't need that A4 paper any more

I've never done a pure charcoal pic - it's always charcoal + graphite and/or white pencil but I imagine that putting clean paper down to protect the areas would work too. You can also fix areas as you make progress. A word about blowing - never blow directly onto the paper. If a bit of spit gets onto your paper, that's it - you may as well start again. Always blow indirectly (like down onto the table in front of the paper or something) or use a hand vaccum unit.

-----Maverick1001

The links to this comment, the artist's page, and the piece follow;
Comment (#146997060)

A wizard is never late

Do Unto Others before They Do Unto You

~DeeAyAich — Sun, 11 Sep 2005 07:41:52 PDT

About this time four years ago, I had a pulled muscle somewhere in my right side. I had called in to work and said that I wouldn't be able to make it in for a few days back on the ninth. It felt absolutely that terrible: I couldn't walk upright, much less stand for eight or more hours in one place at my job.

And I worked at a blood center.

About four years and thirty minutes ago (as of the time I'm typing this), my mother called and asked if I had the TV on. "There are some crazy things going on up in New York," she told me.

So I got up, hobbled over to the TV and turned on CNN. News anchors were using a lot of filler sounds ... "uhms" and "errs" ... and accompanied them with a lot of shifting papers. What was going on was happening right before even their eyes.

There was smoke pouring out of one of the towers of the World Trade Center.

As I watched, a plane flew into the second tower.

I called work and told them I was coming in. Pain or not -- I knew the blood center was going to have a tremendous spike in donations for the next few days -- I felt I needed to be there to help out. I skipped my last doses of Vicodin and went in at my regular time that day, and stayed late.

Now, at this point I would say a lot of you would be expecting me to mention something about heroism. Yes, there was indeed quite a bit of heroism that day; a lot of heros came in and gave blood. Earlier, a lot of heros rushed in to secure the towers and rescue survivors. There were heroes at the Pentagon helping people to escape that inferno. There were even heros in a fourth plane that took the hijackers out before they could reach their target.

I'm really wondering is what is it we have learned from the experience, if anything at all. The only thing I fear is that the lesson learned from that day is the title of this piece; do unto others before they do unto you.

...That's an old one, and it lead to this situation in the first place....

Learning Abounds

~DeeAyAich — Wed, 31 Aug 2005 20:57:42 PDT

All right, I think I just discovered why a certain class of artist winds up loosing sleep. You all start projects that you must see through, no matter what. I just found that out about 50 minutes ago ... when I should have been in bed.

My second drawing of Daphne is ready to go up. It's charcoal this time, and on a more traditional medium -- a Number 15, Tuppence Sketch pad at 9 by 12 inches. (It's much better for charcoal sketching than a pack of Post-Its, let me tell ya!)

Two drawings of Daphne this week? ... I'm supposedly a Velma fan....

Ooooooh, Weee!

~DeeAyAich — Sat, 27 Aug 2005 07:59:40 PDT

These Prismacolors are worth the investment!

As are the charcoal and graphite pencils I bought. (Along with the tracing paper and the sketchbook, too. Now, to search for tutorials and catch up on the skill I've let languish for more than 15 years!)

First Cut's Always the Deepest.

~DeeAyAich — Wed, 24 Aug 2005 13:53:33 PDT

I just finished my first day back to college since 1997. It felt great to be back. Apparently, I look pretty young to these college kids. One of them today, as part of an excersize in Basic Public Speaking, guessed my age at 20. Ummm....Wow? I was sitting right next to him and smiled at a couple of the funnier things the instructor said ... could he not get a glimpse of the crows' feet juuuust begining to form at the corners of my eyes? Ah, well. I suppose a 20 year old who stays up late drinking might look 11 years older than he really is. Either that, or a 31 year old who just now has started getting into that idea has spared his health and looks 11 years younger. Either way, I'm flattered.

I think this is actually going to be a lot easier than the first two times around. I don't really know what's changed about me. It could be that I've finally seen enough of that fabled 'real' world that college just isn't intimidating anymore. I talked one-on-one with all three of the instructors I had today, and each and every one of them seemed completely accessible. Once upon a time, talking to someone that had a Ph.D. attached to their name was like walking up to an altar to talk to Zeus. Now, they're just other human beings who wasted their money and time on Earth in pursuits different than mine. (I.E., they actually had pursuits.) Behind a Doctor Soenso is a former Mr. Soenso -- who was, at one time, a frightened kid fresh out of high school, before that a frightened kid out of middle school, and .... you get the point. In case the Doctor Soenso was a Ms. Soenso, adjust the gender of the pronouns accordingly. The idea is still the same; fear, trepidation, and later, triumph over the fear and trepidation.

First ... Survey ... Ever!

~DeeAyAich — Sun, 21 Aug 2005 21:01:43 PDT

I saw this over on 's page. I've been a long time in answering hers ... I wanted my answers, if not to be witty, to at least reflect my personality and my thoughts/feelings about the subject matter. I got to the last question, and decided to take it seriously enough to post it here. I normally think these things are a silly waste of time, but for those of you who don't know me well enough, I am a connoisseur of all things silly!

1. Give me a nickname and explain why you picked it.

2. Am I lovable?

3. How long have you known me?

4. When and how did we first meet?

5. What was your first impression?

6. Do you still think that way about me now?

7. What do you think my weakness is?

8. Do you think I'll get married?

9. What makes me happy?

10. What makes me sad?

11. What reminds you of me?

12. If you could give me anything what would it be?

13. How well do you know me?

14. When's the last time you saw me?

15. Ever wanted to tell me something but couldn't?

16. Do you think I could kill someone?

17. Describe me in one word.

18. Do you think our friendship is getting stronger/weaker/or staying the same?

19. Do you feel that you could talk to me about anything and I would listen?

20. Are you going to put this on your journal and see what I say about you?

Back Up and Running!

~DeeAyAich — Sat, 13 Aug 2005 12:47:30 PDT

I did what someone suggested a month ago. At least, I finally got around to doing it.

In my last journal entry, I copmlained about my computer's unpredictable moods ... how it would slow down or freeze up with the slightest provocation. Someone, and I think it was THartman1956 (his icon -- ) told me to unplug everything, blow the dust off of the components and put it back together.

All in all, that wasn't a time consuming process. It took all of about 25 minutes, a vacuum cleaner and my own breath. That was probably the worst combinations of tools I could have used. I'm fairly sure that human breath is too moist to be used on a computer's entrails. (I held the vacuum hose a good six inches away from everything; I just used it to pull the dust away from my face as I stirred things up.)

Let me tell you this ... I thought dust bunnies were things which grew under beds, dressers and couches. I never expected to see them in a computer tower. But, I popped the case open and there before me lie a warren!

That didn't necessarily end my problems, though. One thing that persisted up until about a week ago is that the boot-up sequence would hang just after the opening screen. I have a Compaq Presario, and to tell you how long it has been since I've had a new computer, this thing used to skip the old memory tests and go straight to the Windows Logo screen where the only evidence that these old tests were still running was a little Star Trek looking bar with lights scrolling across it. That's the screen which would half-way load up, and then set dim and still for hours on end if I walked away to do something else after I had turned the computer on.

After reconfiguring the thing (pushing the hady old F8 button after turning it on), I found out why that page hung up. The memory check would stop. This used to happen three or four times a week. Even when the computer did boot up, there was an awful lot of hard drive activity.

(From here, let me tell you that I'm still not accustomed to having a hard drive. I went from a Tandy 1000 with no hard drive at all, but with a couple of floppy disk drives for disks that were actually floppy, to having a Windows '95/'98 system that had a 7.5 gigabyte hard drive in it. ...I'm an old Tandy guy. I know it's a strange thing to refer to a 31 year-old as, well ... old, but when it comes to computers, that's the way I feel.)

So, I've done some reading in the past month, and I found out that the hard drive can act as a virtual RAM chip in case the computer runs short on its already installed RAM. Here I was completely unaware that lots of disk activity meant I had a RAM problem. I thought it meant that someone other than me had access to my hard drive. So, I pulled the thing apart one more time, dusted it out again, and put my RAM back in a different slot. Now the hard drive light hardly ever lights up once the computer has booted, and I haven't had any more freeze ups.

....But, I'll see how long that lasts once I get my officially liscened TRS-80 emulator in the mail. (I've gotten to where I miss the old BASIC programming I used to do when homework was done. The charming little beeps, bloops, and pixelated graphics ... Aaahhh, the old days!)

Computer Failure

~DeeAyAich — Sun, 10 Jul 2005 20:29:03 PDT

Sorry I didn't get to say good night to anyone on chat tonight. Yahoo Messenger unexpectedly shut down right in the middle of a line I was typing. For once, though, it wasn't a problem with Yahoo--it was a problem on my hard drive.

I tried to open messenger back up, but it said I didn't have the system resources to do it. I tried to open a few other random programs (Internet Explorer included) and got the same error message every time.

Insufficient System Resources.

Looks like I've got more work to do on this thing....

Catching Up

~DeeAyAich — Wed, 06 Jul 2005 16:23:16 PDT

By the time I adjust to having these extra features, the free trial will expire.

Mood: Happily Harried
Listening to: Child is Father of the Man by Brian Wilson
Reading: Ogden Nash Pocket Book
Watching: American Heart

Well, I've got several dozen (understatement!) photographs from the Fourth of July and beyond. (Hey! Do I hear groaning from NAU? Stuff it!)
I haven't gotten around to posting anything because, quite frankly, something's hit the fan! Mix of good news and bad news. I got fired, and a few days later I got news that I'm getting financial aid once again! Amazing how it works out. I won't need to work this coming semester, unless it involves classwork! I've always had a terrible time balancing work and school. I haven't tried doing the two at the same time in almost nine years, so I don't know how well I would be able to hack it now. All I know is that I'll be keeping an eye open for job opportunities for Geology students who do not currently hold a degree.

I get a footer now? Whoa! What's the world coming to when a guy like me gets a footer?

Quick Question

~DeeAyAich — Tue, 05 Jul 2005 17:45:40 PDT

Mood: Inquisitive
Listening to: Surf's Up
Reading: Eats Shoots and Leaves
Watching: War of the Worlds

Is it juuuuust me, or does anyone else find the Fanta advertising campaign slightly disturbing?

Today's the Day

~DeeAyAich — Tue, 28 Jun 2005 16:39:23 PDT

I said (I think) in an earlier journal entry that I have enrolled in classes. I even have a schedule. I'm still waiting to hear about my financial aid; I've been on academic probation since my second semester (Spring '94.) On that front, all looks good -- I've sent an appeal letter to get my aid reinstated, and the lady who reviews those things seems to think that I've got a good chance of getting it back this year.

Now, on to work related news; (...Hell of a way to spend your second day back from Family Medical Leave....)

I was fired today. Same problem as usual, and it's a problem I've heard my now former co-workers refer to as "nit picking." It seems, and I've noticed as well, as if many other people have had the same problem I've had, yet they've never faced a day of suspension, let alone 8 days of suspension and a firing. What's worse for my employer is that the 'mistakes' that I've made can be attributed to my learning disability; I've informed them of this disability, and I even gave the formal diagnosis to the very human resources director who presided over my termination today. (Human Rights Cabinet of Kentucky has already been notified. There had not been any attempts at accomodation; merely suspensions and threats of termination.)

Good news on that, though, is I'm elligible for unemployment. Bad news is that unemployment won't keep my bills paid until school starts.
Ah, well. Once school starts, it will more than make up for what promises to be a tight couple of months (that I'm going to spend talking to attorneys....)

No More Need for Worry

~DeeAyAich — Thu, 16 Jun 2005 15:42:46 PDT

That nerve condition seems to be resolving on its own. All the doctor told me to do was to maintain my workouts with the rubber band thing I got from the physical therapist and the hand weights I bought yesterday. Surgery will not be needed! Yahoo!
Now I'm back to work on Monday, June 27 -- after having burned through all sick and vacation time. Ah, well ... at least I'll be able to work at all!
(Also, look for me to get back into some creativity soon!)

The Month the Got Away...

~DeeAyAich — Mon, 13 Jun 2005 08:42:09 PDT

Sheesh...I can't believe it's been over a month already since I last did a journal. Well, updates:
Left arm, though no longer hurting (as often), is still acting up. When it isn't acting up, it's still difficult to hold on to anything that weighs much more than a sheet of paper. I had a nerve conductivity test done, and I have a pinched nerve in my elbow. I'll be having surgery for it some time soon. (Until then, I'm on Family Medical Leave -- and have been on it with only 50 hours on the paychecks I've gotten. I set it up that way so I wouldn't wind up burning through all my sick/vacation hours all at once.)
I've been doing all sorts of carrying and lifting with my right arm, but that's a challenge.
So, to keep myself from going bats just waiting around for surgery, I found a neat little job that may or may not pay anything; I'm a production assistant on a low budget supernatural thriller being filmed in and around Lexington. (I've already told the director and his staff my deal...no lifting iss involved with my job! ...Considering the fact that I can't really hold on to anything with my left hand, they don't let me cary much, either. I'm there to help keep track of continuity and to disperse messages to cast, crew and extras. It's fun, but ... I'll remain professional about it. Those of you who've produced films or worked on teams that have put together books know how things can get. ...Right, and ?

I've been trying also to catch up on all the fanfics the Velma forum folks have been writing. That's proven difficult. I've loved what I've read so far, and I intend to keep reading whenever I find a free moment. I don't know when that will be, though. I'm not only facing this surgery, helping with the movie, and worried about lack of income ... I'm also getting myself prepared for another run at college. I've been accepted back to the University of Kentucky, and I'm hoping that this elbow thing doesn't interfere with this coming semester. (In fact, I'm bound and determined to disallow that. I don't care if my arm falls off, I'm going to finish my education.)

David the One Armed Bandit

~DeeAyAich — Thu, 05 May 2005 20:51:38 PDT

I haven't been complaining about it, but I've had a nice little development lately: I've got a pinched ulnar in my left arm. Half of my hand stays numb for days on end. When it isn't numb, it's got pain shooting through it. On one occasion, I lost control of my left hand and let go of the glass bottle I held in it. I haven't done anything like that since I was very, very young. (In fact, it was before I learned to control my muscles anyway -- no one expects us to be all that coordinated at that age!)

Since I've been leaving my left arm hanging and trying to do everything with my right arm (I've typed all this out one-handed in fact), my right arm isn't feeling too great either.
(I haven't told my doctor how much time I spend at the computer. I know I should -- I'll get around to it.)

Maybe after the surgery, I'll try not to spend so much time with my arms and hands in such odd positions. Repetive stress injuries really suck. I should have taken breaks from all this computer stuff anyway....

Suspension. yeah.

~DeeAyAich — Fri, 22 Apr 2005 17:07:31 PDT

I've been hesitant to do a journal about this, because I try to keep my personal life seperate from my work-life. But, I was given a five day suspension this past Monday. Wondeful thing is that I am now out nearly 400 dollars--at a time when I'm trying to save every penny for a return to college...

Another thing I've been hesitant to write about--I've got a learning disability. I'm not the slightest bit ashamed of it. I'm just tired of hearing people talk about how they "don't believe" in my particular disability. (It's not like I was baptized in it. And, if I was, I would've voluntarily left the flock years ago.) I don't want any more advice on it, either. If you don't believe in it, you don't have it, and you're not trained to deal with it ... I don't want to hear much of what you have to say. Talk to me about TV, movies and music instead.

So I've told all the folks at work about this disability. I asked for accomodations--very simple ones ... the only one I've insisted upon is having a patient trainer who doesn't mind repeating themselves ad everyone else's nauseum. That wasn't granted. Along with that request, and at a time when I knew it was my quirk (I'm tired of using 'disability'--being corrected for using that word) that caused problems, it was suggested that someone should double check any paperwork I had to do. That was maintained, for a short time, and that improved. People caught my mistakes, I corrected them, and we all went on about our business.

Here lately (that being in the past 18 months) the phrase "we don't have the time to ____" (fill in the blank with the way a process should be done) has been uttered just about every hour on the hour. That means if they don't have time to do 'run of the mill' stuff properly, they don't have enough time to help with a fairly simple accomodation.

So, two and three months ago, in the midst of 'we don't have the time to ___' storms, I made a few mistakes. They weren't brought to my attention the days after they happened because superiors 'didn't have the time' to fill me in on anything which I used to hear on the days after these kinds of mistakes happened--when there is still time to correct the mistakes before they were committed to permanent files...

But, that's all said and done. I'm out the 400 dollars from work. Now, I need some ideas on how to make up for that loss--and perhaps to come out ahead.

That's the advice I'm soliciting now. I want to hear that! ....How do I (legally) come up with four hundred bucks on short notice when I don't have anything of value to sell? (All my CDs are old and worn out, as is my VCR and TV. This computer isn't worth the time of day anymore--depreciation on these things is absolutely ridiculous.)

________________________________________ ____________

"...We'll have to cut a few corners now, fellas. Little things like .... Engines...."
-----Hunt Stevenson (Michael Keaton) from the movie Gung Ho.

...Beware the Ides of April...

~DeeAyAich — Fri, 15 Apr 2005 10:30:57 PDT

Coming to a theater near you ....

This-Space-for-Rent Studios presents

A DeeAyAich film ....

The Taxman Cometh

Starring;

Tommy Chong as Taxpayer #1
Jack Black as Taxpayer #2
Ving Rames as the Auditor
Woody Allen as the Accountant

A Mendicino County *ahem* farmer and his young student try to write off horticultural equipment as a business expense. However, when they miss a glaring error on their business's return, it triggers an audit--and hilarity!

The Taxman Cometh
"There's more than one way to file 'jointly'!"

Ennui

~DeeAyAich — Fri, 08 Apr 2005 12:07:37 PDT

Creativity ... flagging. Writing ... only fragments. Bored, bored, bored. At least there are still paychecks.

Disappointment and Hubris

~DeeAyAich — Sat, 02 Apr 2005 12:58:12 PST

Well, this has been an interesting week. Someone gave me an unintended boost in page views, and it was nice of them to do so. I was wondering how I could do that on my own, then along comes someone I might have considered a friend under different circumstances to help out. Mister, if you ever cruise back this way, rest assured that I did have fun with you--for tens of minutes. Thinking of a good way to rebutt you gave me all the satisfaction of swatting a mosquito. I mean, come on...How much fun can I have calling someone a maudlin, pedantic phallocranium if they don't seem likely to understand a word I say?

But I forget--I've had ten more years on the planet to be reminded that I don't know everything about art or writing.

I see you've gone after a twelve year old this time. You took away any fun I could have had with you by taking on such an unfathomable challenge. The way I see it, I could also be taking that kind of fun away from a 42 year old who thinks I shouldn't have bothered with a 21 year old in the first place.

By the way, I've had the chance to read your Live Journal in its entirety. Thirty-four posts before you went negative and ranted about all the things that suck about Deviant Art. Well, having had the chance to read about your life, I've got to say in all honesty--I hope things get better for you. (My parents divorced when I was 21 as well. It's rough.)

Just cheer up, man. There are roughly 11.3 million entries on Deviant Art. Some of them have to be worthwhile, just becuase the Law of Averages says so. I find it hard to believe that this place is dominated by things that aren't worth the look. Trust me...I've noticed the art that's lacking. It is stuff that parents would put up on refrigerators. Those parents would simply be encouraging their children to create as I hope yours did when they discovered your talents too.

But then there are plenty that are worhtwhile. I add them to my favorites and will tell them all right now--you all are much better artists than I am. Keep on drawing, painting, rendering, shooting, manipulating, writing ... just keep creating. Give each other a reason to think, space out, laugh, cry, smile, frown, love and hate. Draw your vistors in with beauty, and repulse them with hideousness.

Show us life.

On Vision and Self Control

~DeeAyAich — Wed, 30 Mar 2005 11:00:38 PST

As you all know, I was singled out a few days back as a 'crap artist.' I haven't let loose on my estimate of the condition of art being produced today--officially.

But, let me do so now...with as much restraint as I can muster. Whether artists are good or bad, they deserve my respect. Here goes anyway.

To be an artist is to naturally have something to say about the world around you. As I've mentioned earlier, I am a former science student. (What I didn't mention earlier is that Physics students are similar to Marines; once a science geek, always a science geek.)

I'm mentioning my Physics background becuase of the nice little thing called the Heisenburg Uncertainty Principle. Part of that principle states that you change an outcome simply by observing it. That may only apply at the "quantum level," but take a look around you. Realize that there are indeed things a great deal smaller than us. On the grand scale of the entire Universe, though, we human beings are closer to the infinitesmal (protons, electrons, quarks) than the infinite (galaxies, galaxy clusters, the Universe as a whole.) There are, in fact, many more galaxies than there are human beings; I claim that I can safely assume our behaviors match more closely to those of quarks than galaxy clusters. Therefore, by observing each other's behaviors, we change the behavior.

Now, back to the person whose opinion of art is so high that he felt the need to say "next week, another bad deviant will be torn a new one"--his words on his Live Journal.

This person has no sense of irony whatsoever. Nor do many of his friends. One of the comments I read to this kid's post was, on the subject of my picture, "Oooh! He's a hottie!" Way to educate yourself; anyone who's paid attention to my site knows I posted that picture because "I don't want people to be dissappointed when they see me in person!" Come on, kids. You know that self-depreciation is a part of my rapport, don't you? Or, did you all not care to read far enough?

Another indication of the lack of irony is that one person actually read my other weblog. For that, I congratulate her; that's something I would have done. For other things, I must say that she's another perfect example of our youth not understanding irony; she made references to my posts about sinus infections and my having crappy tastes in music. I read her weblog (something upon which I'm sure she wasn't counting) and found numerous references to similar things. In fact, she even calls her friends (and knowing her attitude now, I have to wonder just how true any of her friends are to her) "Fellow Sufferers." Hmm. So, my suffering through a sinus infection didn't touch anything in her. (Quick note; I posted that sinus infection stuff for two reasons; 1. to let my friends know I wasn't going to be at my computer for a few days and 2. it was a silly thing to post. I love intentional silliness. Get over it. I don't like unintentional silliness, which I'm about to rant on in the next paragraph.)

So, we have her commenting about the lameness of my journal. (I know I've used the word 'blog', but I hate it. I detest the use of things like "LOL" or "LFMAO" or even "ROFL," which was the title of dear artwatcher's next Live Journal entry. You comment about my photography, I'll comment about your "webified" kiddie speak.) I read this marvelous young lady's journal. To my not so great surprise, it was no more insightful than mine. Someone said something hurtful to her about her college experience being worthless? Hah. College is worthless; tens of thousands of dollars of utter worthlessness per semester.

And guess what? I'm going into it, too. So long as people are awed by a framed piece of paper saying you threw your money away, they will treat you like gold. You might feel like pyrite (fool's gold, since I know that you self-designated artwatchers probably won't care to inform yourselves about the basics) but keep in mind who you think you're surrounded by.

Funny thing is that you're absolutely right. There are indeed a great many fools in the world, and some of them will say cruel, heartless things that make you want to cry. I don't know of anyone who hadn't been hurt by something like this at least a dozen times a month before their twenty-first, or even twenty-fourth birthdays. A waste is a terrible thing to mind, kids. I hope you're learning this. I hope you eventually realize your place in the scheme.

In other words, I'll dignify you with responses. But, I'm not minding you.

Nice to Know I'm Being Appreciated!

~DeeAyAich — Tue, 29 Mar 2005 11:32:58 PST

At my weblog, I was tipped off to this [link] in a comment from yesterday. Nice to know I'm being appreciated.

So, first things first--I never said anything about being any sort of a visual artist. I'm an actor turned physics student turned college dropout turned writer/laboratory technician. My photos, drawings and manipulations aren't much. I'm the first to admit. But, I do them. I'm just like anyone else--if I were to think hard enough about this life, I would lose any reason to wake up tomorrow morning. (To quote Kurt Vonnegut, being alive is a crock of shit.)

So is my art a crock of shit. It seems to be prevalent, but I'm not complaining. Let the goths post their fake blood, let the 29 year old Ph. D. candidates post drawings of Scooby Doo and friends. Let the 'procrastinators' post (admittedly) un-composed photographs or 'suckified' manipulations of shots out their back doors. If 'bad' art doesn't indicate the silliness and futility of this life, then what does?

Perhaps commenting on things that aren't worth the effort?

Dodging Lightening...

~DeeAyAich — Sun, 27 Mar 2005 20:44:50 PST

Well, my usual Sunday night fare was interrupted. (I really shouldn't be on right now!) I love the Velma Dinkley Chats on Yahoo, but owing to weather, I had to shut my computer down.

I just wanted to post a journal to let those folks know I look forward to 'seeing' them next week!

Humpday Quote of the Week!

~DeeAyAich — Wed, 23 Mar 2005 11:03:59 PST

Anyone who has never made a mistake has never tried anything new.
-----Albert Einstein

Beware the Naked Mole Rats!

~DeeAyAich — Fri, 18 Mar 2005 09:17:37 PST

Greetings Gang!

First of, a mental rambling; I wish I knew how to give these journal entries a traditional structure. You know--A five space indent at the beginning of each new paragraph. Enough of that, though!

There has been a deviation on my watchlist (done by ) that I've been wanting my Velma_Dinkley friends to see! (Especially the ones that inspired the title of this journal entry.)

Here's the [link] to it! Comment and tell me if you've seen this yet! (The rest of her gallery is pretty breathtaking. I could probably click on something at random and find a new favorite!)

Kelly, O'Connell, Culhane and McCleary

~DeeAyAich — Thu, 17 Mar 2005 12:12:51 PST

Shaughnessy, Murphy, McGuire, OShea
Now these I relates are me best Irish mates
Well, hooray for the Irish, its St. Patricks Day
-----From NRBQ's 'It's Saint Patrick's Day' on the album You're Nice People You Are

Happy St. Patrick's Day!

Perhaps I'll be over this dang sinus infection in time to participate in the parade which was postponed from last weekend to this coming Saturday! If I am, I'll post pictures from within it!

Lyrics quoted are copyrighted to their authors. Printed without permission in the hopes that it may spurr sale of one or two more albums for this wonderful band.

deviantART: by:DeeAyAich

A Quick Experiment

And *I* Thought Classmates Dot Com Would Be Fun!

Why I'm Going to Do It Anyway.

Why I Can't Do Satire

All Joking Aside....Well, At Least Most of It.

Entering the Elephant's Den

Money. It's a Hit.

Phishing Scam

Gonna Be Off for a While (Maybe)

Addendum to Jan 10, 2009

Found This, But Forgot What I Was Looking For!

Since We Know the Difference is Lipstick ...

Gone Vegetarian ... Again.

Life is Worth Losing

Quick Election Opinion Piece

Two Months' Recovery

He Slimed ... Uhm... She Tagged Me

This Is Some Wild Stuff!

A FollowUpdate

A Quick Update

A Break in the Weather, a Break in the Silence

Scooby Doo Creator Dies at 81

One and a Half Finals Down, Three and a Half to Go

Reflections on September.

Problem Solved

Could Someone Explain...

All Worked Up ... Over Nothing

Third Midterm Blues

Expanding Music Collection

Expanding Music Collection

Brain Drain

Happy New Year to One and All

Grades Are In

Acid Redux Department

Acid Reflux Department

Bad News, Good News

A Question I Couldn't Answer

Do Unto Others before They Do Unto You

Learning Abounds

Ooooooh, Weee!

First Cut's Always the Deepest.

First ... Survey ... Ever!

Back Up and Running!

Computer Failure

Catching Up

Quick Question

Today's the Day

No More Need for Worry

The Month the Got Away...

David the One Armed Bandit

Suspension. yeah.

...Beware the Ides of April...

Ennui

Disappointment and Hubris

On Vision and Self Control

Nice to Know I'm Being Appreciated!

Dodging Lightening...

Humpday Quote of the Week!

Beware the Naked Mole Rats!

Kelly, O'Connell, Culhane and McCleary

And I Thought Classmates Dot Com Would Be Fun!