...so i thought i would make a video tutorial kinda thing...well, it's more like a walkthrough People have been asking me how i draw and my friends have been asking me to make a tutorial for drawing hair and while i was trying to do that for them i thought...this would be easier as a video XD so...ta da! lol

you can find it here --->> [link]

I'm sorry in advanced for the shit quality and all the excess screen that's just not needed but i haven't learnt how to crop cause im new and special OH! and don't slag me for how many times it took to sign my name like i said....special! hehe

Anyway, i hope i helps or whatever, if folk like it i'll try making more...better ones too! lol
^^

Follow me --- [link]
Follow Loki --- [link]

Commission info:

Portraits only. Either of real people or OC's.
Black and white -- [link] -- £10
Full colour -- [link] [link] -- £15

Reference image must be provided. (at the risk of sounding obvious)

Special requests are open...prices will be negotiable.

..:http://Em-j-akahana.deviantart.com/journal/26990059/ Thu, 03 Sep 2009 04:34:38 PDT Flat buddies!!:


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Hey ho! Just doing some updates lolz wasting time before i have to go back to the work place T.T I've been working pretty much solidly for the last week and a smidge so im pretty tired However i'm still managing to find time to get some art done, i have like 5 drawings and two commissions and a card design under my blt at the moment :s which is great but it means everything's moving along so very slowly and i must apologise to those who are waiting on their commissions thank you for being so patient with me guys.

Apart from that and working so hard i'm pretty good for once The Mrs and I are having another wee rough patch but it's nothing we haven't faced before, it's odd how much you're willing to put up with for someone you really seem to care about X3 either that or i'm just a soft wee push over for this guy...which is also true hehe
Speaking of having a soft spot for a guy, i've been thinking about Loki pretty much non stop dure the past week or so and i can't wait to get started on my next picer of him and to pick up his story again ^^ I'll need to get him designed properly, i'm thinking baout extending his tattoo so a naker picer of him is well over due!!! yay!! and i've been listening to a lot of music that reminds me of him...i ahve the Loki itch lol XD AND!! just to make myself seem even more lame than i actually am i decided to make a twitter account for him, basically to help me get inot his character and to show off the sort of lifestyle he leads and the troubles he faces...that and cause it's totally something he would do and it's uber fun!! so if it doesn't seem too weird and ou fancy an look at the man behind the vampire then you can follow him here!! --->> [link]
can only lead to fun times ^^ feel free to banter to him XD he will banter back

Hmm...I'm trying to think if there was anything else i wanted to say xD but as usual i can't think of anything, so i will leave you with this...it was tweeted last night and i thought it was funny xD
[link]
and this!! http://Em-j-akahana.deviantart.com/journal/26595753/ Sat, 15 Aug 2009 03:42:35 PDT Flat buddies!!:


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Woke up this morning to find this in my inbox! Thank you Carro!

...lol but a massive thank you!! To you guys!!! For getting me this far lol Bloody hell, 40K, that's pretty special for an emma

As usual it's like 2am and im wide awake XD I've been drawing all night and im still buzzing, but alas my concentration is fading...so i've put photoshop away and am updating my journal apparently XD (as you can see my train of thought is humped )
Just a little update to say I'm so overwhelmed with ideas for my characters right now, my drawing are over lapping each other...i have like three on the go right now and two raging inside my head!! (oh an, i've got a raging clue right now!) So i can't wait to get stuck back in tomorrow before work X3 Infact! Here's a sneaky wee peak

Cat people!
[link]

Oli!
[link]

That's just her hair though hehe.

Also, i've noticed a phew people making these Dance Dance nation things and (even though there is yet to be a scottish one for me to love over ) I have to say i could listen to that rave music all niight...and i currently am. So here! --- [link]
Does anyone else just want to dance to that? Or is it just me?

Hehe...commission are coming along nicely im enjoyign them and i hope im not taking too long over them, i'll get... ]]> =Em-j-akahana http://Em-j-akahana.deviantart.com/journal/26418260/ http://Em-j-akahana.deviantart.com/journal/26418260/ Thu, 06 Aug 2009 07:46:42 PDT Flat buddies!!:


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Yay! I got my laptop back today ^^ He's all fixed except for his speakers....for some reason absolutely no sound comes out unless im using my headphones :s So that's a bit odd...i shall call them about that tomorrow. lol

I was so worried that i would get it back and it would be wiped completely but everything's here!! my music, my art and my commissions!!! So i'll be noting people about starting them up again hopefully i can NOTE ME IF YOU WANT ONE!!! info is down below

As far as updates go, i've not really been up to much. trying to get some more of my stories written, I started designing a complete race of characters based on cats so hopefully i'll get some concepts up here soon I'm really excited about practicing again...getting my art up to better levels and hopefully getting more concepts finished and out for people to see

Need to catch up with all my messages first though

Commission info:

Portraits only. Either of real people or OC's.
Black and white -- [link] -- £10
Full colour -- [link] [link] -- £15

Reference image must be provided. (at the risk of sounding obvious)

Special requests are open...prices will be negotiable.

..:http://Em-j-akahana.deviantart.com/journal/25551659/ Thu, 25 Jun 2009 22:40:29 PDT Flat buddies!!:


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Alright! So i'm on my mums computer just now...still seeing about getting my laptop sorted :S trying to keep as much of my personal files as possible. It could get messy Hurm. So yeah i should apologise for my lack of progress in my commissions :S i promise i will get straight back into them when my laptop gets repaired typical timing eh? Hopfully the files wont be lost :S grrr!! pain in the ass

On a happier note...I graduated yesterday! yay! I was sooo nervous for no reason but you know me, i worry at the slightest thing, even when there's nothing to worry about. lol but still...i never take anything seriously ^^ -->>

[link]
[link]
[link]
[link]
[link]

I love how happy i look in the second one ^^ makes me smile, i was actually shaking so hard i nearly dropped my degree! lol ahhh...classice em-j
I look so awkward in the last photo...i never know what to do with myself when i have to take a serious picture...this was like the fourth attempt aswell...i was laughing in the first three XD

aww well...so yeah, I'm now a Bachelor of Arts with Honours...has a nice wee ring to it ^^ if only it instantly got me an awesome job!! XD


In other news...IT'S FREAKING HOT!! XD you know...for Scotland anyway. It's not right XD I'm only a fair wee scott! i'm not designed for the sun However, i'm watchign the clouds just now and i reckon we're still due for some thunder! yippee!! i can't wait ^^ i'm going to go outside and stand in it if it happens XD love it!

Right! i have tonnes of messages i need to get through :S best make a start, i'm sorry in advanced for how little i'm going to be online...just 'til... ]]> =Em-j-akahana http://Em-j-akahana.deviantart.com/journal/25346207/ http://Em-j-akahana.deviantart.com/journal/25346207/ Tue, 16 Jun 2009 07:44:28 PDT Flat buddies!!:


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I know i shouldn't be I only end up making yet another journal when i think. I've reached another wall, I have soo many wee skittery sketches and ideas all on the go at once that i'm getting nothing finished lol. So instead of doing something about it i appear to be rambling on the net :S hmm...

It's almost time for me to move out of my flat aswell, so i have a lot of packing i should be doing...which is another thing that's been playing on my mind and distracting me from my 'work'...any excuse really isn't it? So im trying to inspire myself, watching Perfect Blue at the moment, anyone else seen it? It's so awesomely dark and clever im hoping it'll spark something dark and clever in me

hurm...i ahte being stuck with in my own mind XD it's a rather odd wee place...I saw journal today by a frind talking about how people are complaining about thir wieght a lot lately, which is funny cause i saw myself in the mirror th other day and I've PUT ON weight T.T yucky!! It's my own fault for lockingmyself in my flat, eating junk while i sit on the computer all day :s that's if i eat at all...sometimes i can't afford to or i forget but even if you don't eat your body puts on weight! so no one's a winner boo!

At least when i move back ome i hav izzy to walk and wrestle with everyday i love my akita! she's sooooo smart! the other day while i was talking to her she tilted her head, made it look like she kinda knew i may have been maybe talking to her ah, im mental i know.

hmm again...right im off to try and inspire myself...

This was awesome fun to do last time, even though i never got to answer some of them sorry. But here we go again in an attempt to get my brain to work

Ask my characters anything!! State the character and question and i'll try and answer ^^
Fun times!

Commission... ]]> =Em-j-akahana http://Em-j-akahana.deviantart.com/journal/25239991/ http://Em-j-akahana.deviantart.com/journal/25239991/ Wed, 10 Jun 2009 16:48:04 PDT Flat buddies!!:


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I'm really sorry for all the random journals i've been putting up lately, i promise this will be my last for a while. I really don't know how i feel about things right now...and i can't seem to sleep for thinking about it so i guess this is me venting.

I found out my final grades for my honours year...turns out i got it...more or less...

...

...have you ever achieved something...but, because you didn't try your best you feel like you cheated your way through it? I guess that's ho i feel, i feel like i got something i didn't deserve...or maybe even just the thought that's i've let mself down again by not trying as hard as i could...it really upsets me, y'know? I don't really have much to show for myself after being a uni, nothing to really use in my favour when looking for employment :S and i can't help but feel i've wasted my chances...*sighs

So i've vowed im going to take this next year and just live it for myself...get better at what i do and try and get myself out more XD hurm...no more education for me for while :S

meh.

Also i seem to have developed a slight head cold...which sucks XD i never get ill but it seems that the more i say that...the more im getting ill I'm currently in bed with some good music and a cup of tea so at least im content. I've been seeing Donny alot lately, him and some other characters in little scenes that i can't wait to write ^^ i'll work really hard on them! Hopefully get them done soon.

I'm getting ready to move out of my flat in the next couple of weeks, which feels rather weird lol
i really can't afford it though so it's for the best...I have a holiday in turkey to pay for and an electricity bill and other stuff...it just keeps mounting up lol
Which is why i have the commission details at the bottom of my journal, i know no one ever wants one but im hoping someone will randoml see it and think GREAT! XD maybe it would make a nice gift or something? lol Ah well...one can always dream. ^^

I'm starting to fall behind on m comments again XD which i hate cause i always love talking to all you guys!! i just can't do it with everyone which is sad...so here!! --->> [link]
I've had this chatroom for like forever so everyone please, feel free to use it! I'll pop in when ever i can and if people are there we can banter and i'll answer any questions or just have a blatant laugh

Let the good time roll in!

Em-j

Commission info:

Portraits only. Either of real people or OC's.
Black and white... ]]> =Em-j-akahana http://Em-j-akahana.deviantart.com/journal/25185212/ http://Em-j-akahana.deviantart.com/journal/25185212/ Sun, 07 Jun 2009 18:34:56 PDT Flat buddies!!:


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Crummy title i know XD

I can't sleep again!! well...what i mean is im too bus working on my latest drawing to sleep I really should mind my time Craig said he thought my eyes were looking rather yellow today :S can't be a healthy sign lol

I just get so wrapped up in my drawings that i don't realise the time, y'know? *sigh

Anyway, FFXIV trailers have been put up on youtube for the world to see, and i got reeeaaally excited about it!! exclusively for the PS3, beautifully stunning (as always) however it's another damned online game...which instantly threw me...is it just me or should Final Fantasy never be made into a MMORPG? *pouts

Did anybody play FFXI? did it being an MMORPG take away from the story telling at all? 'cause thats one of the best part of Final Fantasy...*pouts more

Acht well...still looking forward to FFXIII and Advent Children Complete I'm such a nerd i know XD


A massive thank you must be said to everyone who supported me through what i mentioned in my last journal, the image was taken down and i have you guys to thank for spotting it, well done It really means alot to me

And now for some art teasers hints to my latest drawing of Dontas


[link]

[link]

enjoy

..: =Em-j-akahana http://Em-j-akahana.deviantart.com/journal/25137523/ http://Em-j-akahana.deviantart.com/journal/25137523/ Fri, 05 Jun 2009 05:21:03 PDT Flat buddies!!:


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Firstly i want to thank you all for your support on my latest drawing of Dontas [link] Getting him onto the front page was such a wonderful surprise ^^ THANK YOU!!

However i'm worried about something, i was noted the day after i submitted Donny about an image they had seen that was blatant use of my paintng by another artist. I thought that it may just have been a misunderstanding...maybe they thought it was a picture of TORA, seen as how i did use him as reference but even then, i referenced TORA, they didn't even do that much, it was just a vague implication. Anyway, i have since signed my picer of Donny so it wont get confused again...i shouldn't have to though...

Here's the image, make your own mind up --- [link]

On a completely different note i've finished my course!! Just waiting for my results :S joy. So i'm totally loving the fact i dont have snything to worry about except my boys and my stories ^^ Last week was very very sunny for Scotland so i went out for a bike ride around the valley...lets just say i got soooooooo sunburned it hurts to take a shower XD lol It was my own fault for not wearing suncream was fun though.

Craig (the ex) and i got back together. yay! gonna give it one more shot cause lets face it, im absolutely crazy about him *girly swoon* So expect to hear his name a few times lol

Oh! i had an awesome dream last night! Going to try and write it some time when it get it clear in my head Let's just say Loki run riot during his blood lust and Donny tries to stop him...and fails

Loki + blood lust + park full of children = chaos!!

Twas an awesome dream

Right, i'm off to do another drawing of Dontas. Expect chewable feature and blood covered vampire

..:http://Em-j-akahana.deviantart.com/journal/24996459/ Thu, 28 May 2009 15:16:28 PDT Flat buddies!!:


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ARGH!! im finished my course! waiting for results is killer! lol so is having no loan! im poor again
But i seem to have a bit more time on my hands and i am currently using it to draw DONTAS!! huzzah! thank you to all who inspired me during my last journal I've missed him sooo much! i was at mums last night looking through some of my early ideas for him and i can't wait to start writting about him again...*swoon

Lookie!!



My good chum made Loki a banner! it looks awesome ^^ i'm well chuffed. Thank you so much deary!! It's put me in mind of something though, is there anyone who's good with making Journal skins? I'm terrible at it and i would love to have a personalized journal. ^^ if anyone's up for the challenge give us a note and we shall talk

here's a random piece of imformation for you...I love being naked!!

hehe!!

love you guys!

Dontas sketches?
[link]

just a peek ^^

..: =Em-j-akahana http://Em-j-akahana.deviantart.com/journal/24839462/ http://Em-j-akahana.deviantart.com/journal/24839462/ Thu, 21 May 2009 17:27:28 PDT Flat buddies!!:


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I fell asleep on the couch! lol, im not really one for napping but every now and again i gt so tired that i just pass out...and i'm not sure how i feel about it...i feel a bit sick heh. But, aside from that, things are getting weird again. Last night my brother crashed his car, totally writting it off...it was a complete wreck! The police lady said she'd never seen a crash this bad and watched the driver and passenger walk away from it! He's the luckiest boy on the planet, in all honesty he should be dead makes you think. *sigh

Speaking of boys, i was talking to the ex the other day and we're giving it one last bash (offandonoffandonoffandonoffandon) but if at any point i feel nothing's changed im calling it for good this time which i don't want to happen so here's hoping it doesnt .......


....ok, so i wandered away for a moment just now to make myself something to eat and i wish to retract my last statement about feeling sick. now that im eating i feel great! more awake and content ^^ Having a plate full of veggies! it's times like this that i seriously consider going vergitarian but i know as soon as i get a sniff of some bacon or some steak i'll go all animal

But damn! veggies know where to hit the spot

I'm trying to build myself up to draw Dontas, i'v really been missing him lately but everytime i attempt him i can never pull him off the way i want. *pouts*
But i think im getting lonely with out him lol So im trying to inspire myself, does anyone have any suggestions? anything you guys watch or look at to get your vampire side flowing?

hehe he's looking at my plate of veggies weird aww he's oddly adorable. poor boy can't eat them ^^

ooooooooohhhh!!! I'm getting Dontas hysteria! I may need to lie down again before i start drawing lol!


EDIT:

Is it just me or should Loki be appearing as a model for GAP? ----->> [link] http://Em-j-akahana.deviantart.com/journal/24772052/ Fri, 15 May 2009 16:12:38 PDT Flat buddies!!:


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...im a bit cheesed off! i had my journal all written out and ready for updating and i pressed the wrong tab and lost the whole thing! grrr!! so now you are going to hear a slight hint of annoyance in my writting. It feels like ages since i had time to myself and my imagination, im so tired with all the uni work i've been trying to catch up on over the past few weeks...and i wont be able to write properly again until after the end of the month, i have an end of year exhibition in Glasgow to prepare for...so that should be fun

I can't wait to have some free time thought, i have so many characters i want to draw, ne faces and some old ones that i want to redo busy busy! ^^

Been having more boy trouble lately i really dont know what to do...plus i dont know what to do after my course ends...a masters course would be kool but i dont know if i can afford moving out again just now. i need a better job!! but i'll cross that when i come to it...

...urm, i dont know what else to say so here's my 'must sing' songs of the moment...the one's that are keeping me calm lol
[link]
[link]
[link]

lol i realise im not singing in english a lot lately

Also!! my chum is needing help with titles for her stories and suggestions and comments on her writting. please stop by and drop her a line

...Just cause I can!
... ]]> =Em-j-akahana http://Em-j-akahana.deviantart.com/journal/24452562/ http://Em-j-akahana.deviantart.com/journal/24452562/ Mon, 27 Apr 2009 02:51:43 PDT Flat buddies!!:


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Omg! After feeling so down last night i wake up this morning and i get a wonderful wee comment saying i recieved a Daily Literature Deviation --->> [link] for my 'Conversations' --->> [link]
Thank you sooooo much to and to ~tiraldan for featuring me! I'm sooo happy! thank you thank you thank you!!

...but as usual i'm not...'cause im too worried about my presentation tomorrow :S One day i am just going to worry myself to death Hurm...I'm in the middle of my deadlines just now so i'm trying really hard to get everything all sorted and finished for my course and...well...i keep coming up with more stuff i need to do and it's not doing me any favours :S

Plus, i spoke to mmy ex-ish...don't know what we're doing...boyfriend earlier today and he's asking for more time to get his head round our seperation thing...argh...it's such a mess

I can't wait 'til uni's over and done with...all i want to do is focus on my own stuff, characters and stories...try and get better at digital painting and try my hand at some concept art or professional portraits ^^ that would be fun.

*Sighs. Cries.

On a lighter note, when i was at work last night they handed me a quiz to do while i was on my till (just to make sure i knew the obvious) But as usual i got distracted and started making up my own answers...you know, the kind of answers you wish you had to guts to actually write on the the quiz and hand it in just to take the piss. XD i didn't have the balls to hand it in but i thought i woould share it with you, it got some laughs of my work mates anyway ...

Question 1: How many stars does your store have?

Actual answer: 5
My answer: 5;
1) Hannah Montana (she was on a magazine in my kiosk)
2) That guy that played the GAY sparkly vampire in Twilight. (he was also on a mag, i can never remember his name, must die!)
3) THOR! God of thunder!
4) One of the stars in Orion's Belt
5) David Bowie (he's in accounting)

Question 2: Staff go out of their way to _______

Actual answer: Help.
My answer: Boogie like there's no tomorr... ]]> =Em-j-akahana http://Em-j-akahana.deviantart.com/journal/24295371/ http://Em-j-akahana.deviantart.com/journal/24295371/ Fri, 17 Apr 2009 17:43:49 PDT Flat buddies!!:


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AHHH!! my dealines are coming up and as usual i've left myself no time to get all the work done that i need to do!! GAH! Em-j! ----
so like always i'm in a mad rush at the moment...totally stressed and neglecting my story some what, which sucks! But i'll be needing it for one of my projects so i'll be back to writting after this week hopefully full of ideas...speaking of which, i was thiking about using two of my other stories for the same project and was wondering if you'd like to read them too...or would it be better to just have one on th go at a time? XD i'll leave that up to the people that read it. in the end it's only going to be you that it annoys
One of the stories is Zak's [link] I've been pondering his story for years now and i think i could at least take a stab at it by now XD
The other story is about a character me and my ex-ish boyfriend made up called Oscar. i don't have a picer of him done properly but the (very old) begining of his story can be found here --->> [link] if you're interested ^^

Shocker! I don't just write about vampires hehe.

So yeah! on the subject of my ex-ish boyfriend, he and i are having some issues again and it's BLOODY HARD to deal with lol
I don't think we know whether we're on or off or what the fuck is going on :S it's not good for an already streeful moment in my time. it makes me spazz out like a demon! a demon i say! oh well...we'll be talking on sunday...life goes on...

Ok just thought i'd let you know i can't cope with my messages anymore XD i just had to empty out my notes...my inbow was at like 1585 were as my sent items were at... ]]> =Em-j-akahana http://Em-j-akahana.deviantart.com/journal/24107214/ http://Em-j-akahana.deviantart.com/journal/24107214/ Tue, 07 Apr 2009 17:04:38 PDT Flat buddies!!:


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I went out and bought Twilight.

LET ME EXPLAIN!!

Being the obessive vampire fan that i am and with not only writting my own vampire story, but also writting about vampires for my uni foofin' 12,000 word dissertation :S I need to do a lot of research and since i did a huge ramble about Interview with the vampire (my bible!!) I now need to pick a popular modern vampire story to compare it to and seen as how twilight is insanely popular i chose it but my god! seeing all those giddy people buying it in the que infront of me made my wee face turn red I don't have a problem with people buying it but if asked...and i was...i will state that twinkling vampires are the last fucking thing i want to be buying in to!!

oh god...what has become of me! i keep telling myself that to be a good writter, as i want to be, you can't just research that which is good, you need to also look into the bad and realise what you don't like about it so you know not to follow that direction in your own work. i want to be recognised as a good vampire writter sooo much, it's been my passion since i was born! lol

gahh! i'm just going to watch it, no point putting it off any longer.

wish me luck :s

much love! Em-j.

Gaah! fuck twiligh for a moment! i'm just back from seeing The Prodigy live in glasgow!and it was fucking awesome!!
awww i danced sooooo much my feet are actually throbbing right now! one of the best gigs ever...i don't mind telling you that i was soooo ready for a shower i was basically naked before i even reached the bathroom...it's ok though, i have the flat to myself so no one saw
Bestest songs of the night that i remember:
[link]
[link]
[link]
ahh fuck it! It was all good!!

oh dear...emma sleepy. i can still taste beer on my lips ^^ reckon i need to curl up...better put on some jammies http://Em-j-akahana.deviantart.com/journal/23915412/ Tue, 31 Mar 2009 08:28:35 PDT Flat buddies!!:


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Thank you all so much 30,000 page views is amazing! you all are so wonderful i am overFUCKINGwhelmed ah love you man! *hic*

ALSO!! I CAN'T RESIST TELLING YOU ABOUT THIS!!!

[link]

ZOMG!! when it comes to anything vaguely FFVII related i go mental1 i'm all giddy at the shinyness! will be pre-ordering that!! !! GAAAAAHHHHOMGGGGGG!!!

*breathes!*

One lovely deviant also told me where my webcam giff is from ---->> [link]

Scrummers! oh dear...i'm far too giddy for my own good! *sits down to do rest of journal!*

As far as updates go i don't really know what to say my wee vampire story is coming along ok in my mind (if not really random and all over the place but that's fixable at a later date). I'm really enjoying the character progressions and all so it'll be fun to see how they all turn out ^^
Been talking to 'the boy' again, having some boy issues but nothing that needs to be written here so thats all good urmm...ah sods to the updates!! lets move onto the main event!

Right! a massive thanks to everyone who noted me or who said i could feature them! i owe my 30,000 pageviews to you guys so this is my thanks !!

HERE! Go here! ^^ ---->>[link] for my flatmates web comic... ]]> =Em-j-akahana http://Em-j-akahana.deviantart.com/journal/23888461/ http://Em-j-akahana.deviantart.com/journal/23888461/ Wed, 25 Mar 2009 18:09:43 PDT Flat buddies!!:


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ahem...ok here goes...I've been talking to alot of americans lately, mostly when i bring up somthing to do with either the nationalities of characters or whatever, and these 'americans' will tell me that they're proud to be french or of someother country and i'll get excited and ask if their parents are french and they'll be like...'well they're sort of not actually half maybe twice removed blah blah blah...' basically not french...and i was wondering wtf? Also the line 'i believe the only actual americans are the native americans' really grinds my gears for some reason...if that was the case no country would have actual nationalities...i mean...every country has people who moved in from other countries but through years of breeding they have become what the country is today! if that makes sense! the Scots especially, i have red hair so i've probably got some irish or scandinavian in me...but!! my mother was scottish, my father was scottish and their parents before them, and their parents before them...actually who may have been irish...the point is, i'm scottish!! born and breeded! and proud!

i honestly thought that america was the second most patriotic country on the planet! (second only to Scotland! *is so proud * ) why aren't you all briming with pride over who you are? i am! i love talking to americans ^^

You know what i'm like, i hate kicking up a fuss so please don't think that i'm looking for a fight, i'm just genuinely interested...and curious to see what everybody says. i kinda want to understand someone elses point of view. but i'll brace myself for a good telling off

Also one more thing! just cause i like the nazi uniform doesn't make me a nazi that poll is hilarious, i loved that the people who said they loved the uniform had to say tht they didn't support them, just to be sure i didn't judge, no worries.

um...yeah so sorry...i'll try not to worry and think too much about things like this...but my mind wanders and i just have to ask...please don't hate me i'm sweet...honest...

=Em-j-akahana http://Em-j-akahana.deviantart.com/journal/23781862/ http://Em-j-akahana.deviantart.com/journal/23781862/ Thu, 19 Mar 2009 14:49:25 PDT Flat buddies!!:


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FUUUUUUUUCK ME!!
Firstly let me apologise for updating my journal so soon after my last journal update...i know how much of a pain in the ass i can be just spamming your inboxes but i really need a rant!!

my day was wonderful!! and i really mean that...i got to look after my akita 'Izzy' all day! we went for an amazing walk and just had a beautiful wee day, but then when i took her back down to mums my brother and i got into a bloody fight. i wont bore you with the details nor will i ever attempt to place blame on either one of us *ahem...rrreeeeeaaaaallly tried to hold herself back* BUT JESUS CHRIST!! HE'S A FUCKING RETARD!! SO FUCKING UP HIMSELF!! THINKS HE CAN'T DO ANYTHING FUCKING WRONG!! ALWAYS HAS TO FUCKING GET THE LAST FUCKING WORD IN!!! GGGAAAAAHHHHH I'M SO FUCKING FURIOUS!! and what makes me feel even worse is that my other brother and mum had to hols us back while my 11 year old little sister ran and hid in fear! what kind of monster am i?!!! and i know alot of you out there all fight like fucking animals with your family, and thats great for you, but i don't and this has royally fucked me up!! i mean, what must i look like to anyone who reads this? sitting here fucking alone with nothing to vent over except a fucking online journal, a tub of ice cream and any bloody fucking gory image that i can spam out just to release the anger and frustration that's actually making me shake!!

*sighs...

k...i think that's enough...i need more ice cream...brb.

..::.. =Em-j-akahana http://Em-j-akahana.deviantart.com/journal/23758433/ http://Em-j-akahana.deviantart.com/journal/23758433/ Wed, 18 Mar 2009 05:29:55 PDT Flat buddies!!:


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Not that i've got much to update Been going to uni a lot recently, which is good 'cause im finlly working on my course and stuff, all be it too late but we'll see if she (me) can pull something out of nothing like she always does. it also means that my mind is wandering a lot more than usual so i'm quite sure i'll be spamming your dev watch boxes with stuff. ^^

i don't know if you've noticed but alot of '6's' have been appearing on my page, im my comments, in comments to other people, in my journals and in my latest poll...i'd like to point out that whenever you see a random number '6' it's the work of :devserpntx: As you can see from my latest poll i should never let him anywhere near my DA page cause he just abuses it funny guy.
anyways sorry about that XD

I'm really excited X3 I've started drawing up some design ideas for Cid and i always get giggy when i make a new character, i love making them into a person, choosing their backgrounds, what they like and dislike and just knowing what makes them tick well looking forward to working on him more ^^ Damn having to go to work i have a meeting with my manager tonight and a performance review to fill in so i can't even write more of my wee story T.T ...i'm soooo scared of my manager, hopefully it'll be over before i realise it.

http://Em-j-akahana.deviantart.com/journal/23621014/ Tue, 10 Mar 2009 04:07:48 PDT Flat buddies!!:


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6.

Totally stolen from the beautiful *Xphringe

pick one of my characters and select three or four questions (from the list below, or something you've been dying to know). more than one person can choose the same character with different questions, too.

pick ANY character of mine and i will tell you their:
01. full name
02. best friend
03. sexuality
04. favorite color
05. relationship status
06. ideal mate
07. odd skills/skills in general
08. last amusing escapade
09. favorite food
10. crushes
11. favorite music
12. biggest fear
13. biggest fantasy
14. quirks
15. bad habits
16. biggest regret
17. best kept secrets
18. last thought
19. worst sexual/romantic experience
20. biggest insecurity

Contest. [link]

..::..

LOKI: Chapter 1 [link]

http://Em-j-akahana.deviantart.com/journal/23620982/ Tue, 10 Mar 2009 04:02:56 PDT Flat buddies!!:


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Contest. [link]

..::..

LOKI: Chapter 1 [link]

dWarped Journal CSS is based on the Warped template design by Six Shooter Media. It's avaliable here at deviantArt under the Creative Commons Attribution v2.5.

]]> =Em-j-akahana http://Em-j-akahana.deviantart.com/journal/23558129/ http://Em-j-akahana.deviantart.com/journal/23558129/ Sat, 07 Mar 2009 08:47:01 PST Flat buddies!!:


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.

...so tired. don't want to move, !cinap !cinap .em revo gnilwarc ti leeF Torment. i don't want to go to work. i don't want to face the world, just hide, hide where no one can see where no one can touch. sleep. shut down. break down. shut up. shut up!! SHUT UP!! stop talking to me. leave me alone, please...don't do this to me anymore.
.sekam ym niks lwarc crawl skin my makes.
what am i doing?_{what are you doing?} what am i thinking?_{that you're not good enough!}stop it. don't do it. that's easy for you to say...who? who are you talking to? who do you think is listening? accept it. accept what you are. submit! SUBMIT! bleed. kill. kill it. stop it now. stop touching me! STOP TOUHING ME!!

...

Emma's journal. March 6th, 2009. :

...a comedian died tonight...well, not really So, yeah! went to see the Watchmen last night...and when i got in at 4am this morning i feel into bed and switched on my laptop, ready to rant a journal off about the film but i didn't...and i'll tell you why, 'Cause im scared of the comic book nerds that might scold me for saying that it was a great film (for what it was) with out having read the comic first
i really enjoed it like...REALLY enjoyed it ^^ Dr. Manhattan has Donny's voice!!!! it was awesome to listen to!! hehe!! i melted everytime he opened his mouth ^^
I'll leave you to decide whether you want to go see it and then decide what you thought of it

hurm! i wont lie to you, im well bored today...i don't have any energy and i really wanted to draw or something, i miss donny
I'm a bit stranded just now, the ex and i have been seeing each other on and off for the past few weeks and it's getting a tad stressful...i was hoping to see him but he's going out with his chums ^^ ...ah...i just feel silly and clingy...um...if anyone would want a chat or something, you know, about characters or just some random banter feel free to note me i'd be over the moon.

heh, any way, i'm sure there was more stuff i wanted to ramble about but i forget...silly em-j...i'll probably add to this journal later -thinking out loud now- ...
...
love you guys!! <... ]]> =Em-j-akahana http://Em-j-akahana.deviantart.com/journal/23383833/ http://Em-j-akahana.deviantart.com/journal/23383833/ Tue, 24 Feb 2009 15:22:25 PST Flat buddies!!:


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i actually jumped on this band wagon

Yeah man i have a twitter now
all my friends were doing it and i wanted to be kool too
if you have one feel free to add me [link]
twill be fun

Contest. [link]

Just a quick reminder that i have my contest running! The more people that enter the merrier so give me a note and lets have some fun. if you need the deadline extended it's not a problem ^^

..::..

LOKI: Chapter 1 [link] http://Em-j-akahana.deviantart.com/journal/23360851/ Mon, 23 Feb 2009 14:29:45 PST Flat buddies!!:


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...

Sorry for updating so soon after uploading a new journal but im sooooo stuck with stuff to draw these days, i'm resorting back to sketches right now cause i decided my free hand is dire!!!! SO! would anyone like a commissioned sketch? they'll be really cheap, any extra cash will be much appreciated right now...just give me a note and we'll work something out. i wont take them all so the first few folk that ask will be the ones that get...if anyone asks at all ahem...

...yeah! happy days...happy stuck days...

Did you notice?

While i was at uni today i was told about a thing called 'The Bloop'...don't know if you know about it...is ure as hell didn't, but the funny thing is...i reckon nintendo discovered it first!!

Look at the image of The Bloop in this article ----- [link] and tell me it doesn't look like the Missing No. from pokemon!!
here's an image of the missing number ----- [link]

It's the same thing people!! lol Nintendo found it first!!

i'm sorry for the spam! i'll get back to work ^^

Contest. [link]

Just a quick reminder that i have my contest running! The more people that enter the merrier so give me a note and lets have some fun. if you need the deadline extended it's not a problem ^^

..:http://Em-j-akahana.deviantart.com/journal/23229837/ Mon, 16 Feb 2009 07:21:48 PST Flat buddies!!:


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A series of very odd events.

Well, i've had an eventful past few days. On frinday i went to see Nosferatu at the Glasgow film festival, which was awesome! It had a live musical accompaniment AND!! i got myself a mention from the musician he said he was told someone in the queue waiting to get in said she was here for the vampires...and that was me! i was well chuffed! he said that if at the end of the screening, if he found someone pale faced and lacking blood he would know to come after me Huzzah for vampires!! lol

Valentines day was weird this year, being single for the first time in years was a bit hard so i thought i would take an extra shift in at work to keep my mind off things. However, it was one of the worst shifts of my life! i was only working 8 hours but i was working constantly! i forgot that people wait til last minute to buy cards and stuff...so i was worked to the point of exhaustion T_T but i was ok...even went round to my mates house for a few hours ^^ all was well. but when i got to bed i felt weird, i couldn't get to sleep 'cause i felt this weird tug in my stomach...by 5am i got up for a glass of water and tried to sleep again but when 6am came round i was so violently sick i thought i was dying! i've ner felt so much pain in my life i was genuinely scared didn't sleep at all after that...which sucked cause the next morning i had to go down to england to pick up out new dog with mum...which i did it was totally worth it, even though i was arely conscious in the car lol

BUT SHE'S GORGEOUS!! She's a japanese akita and i've always wanted an akita!! she's the most cuddly dog aswell, she's always smiling ^^
She's only a puppy, i think she's 7 months or something...but she's already as big as my collie ^^ and has much more to grow...she's gona be great! LOOKIE!!
[link]
[link]
http://Em-j-akahana.deviantart.com/journal/23133211/ Wed, 11 Feb 2009 04:51:08 PST Flat buddies!!:


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But first...

...i want to thank for my 3 month sub when i really needed it and for making Zak a stamp!!

please feel free to use it
i'm so touched

thank you to everyone who had made me or my characters stamps, it's really amazing...please use them if you want and thank the makers for me ^^

Heartbroken.

Me and my boyfriend broke up yesterday. We had been together for nearly four years and we met when we were really young so it feels like a piece of me has been ripped from my body. same old cliched bollocks.
We have been arguing for a while now and i know that he wanted this for just as long but its so strange having to face it...i guess it might be why i've been so unhappy for so long but...we both talked and decided we're goign to stay friends...quit while we're ahead before we start hating each other which is good i guess
I don't know what to do with myself anymore. i don't have to worry about asking if he wants to do anything after work or, if he wants to meet up and head into town...and it's going to take some major getting used to cause i really miss it...
I guess this will take time...sorry for the venting lol

Contest. [link]

..:http://Em-j-akahana.deviantart.com/journal/23074850/ Sun, 08 Feb 2009 04:37:35 PST Flat buddies!!:


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Don't worry they didn't get me...

...but seriously wtf? do people not have anything better to do anymore than go on DA and hack everyones profiles? On of my best DA friends just got hacked and i'm furious!!
=Jiyuu-Chan

seriously!! go see what they've written on her account! its sick!! surely something can be done to stop them i miss her heh...

Please, if you see any comment that says anything about you being feature in a blog and has a link that says' 'CLICK HERE' PLEASE!!! DON'T CLICK IT!!

In other news...

...I've finally started my dissertation for university it may be alittle too late but i'm trying lol i need 12,000 words by april and so far i'm just under 2,000 so i need you're help i'm conducting research in to the effect and appeal the vampire has on gothic and morbid art so i need as many opinions on the matter as you care to give out, both supporting and against the idea that vampires are infulention icons in the gother culture. honestly, rant and ramble away i'd love to hear detailed thoughts ^^ Also i set up pole for this question to so feel free to vote

thank you for helping, and also thank you all for your support, i know i don't thank my watchers enough but i really love you all!! you really help me through my rough patches heh

Thanks again

Em-j.

xoxoxoxoxox

Contest. [link] =Em-j-akahana http://Em-j-akahana.deviantart.com/journal/23037830/ http://Em-j-akahana.deviantart.com/journal/23037830/ Fri, 06 Feb 2009 10:08:30 PST Flat buddies!!:


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=serpentx is good ^^

Firstly i want to say thank you to devchili19: for buying me a 3 month subscription (and blackmailing me to draw her pictures ) lol many cheers sweet heart!

Now!! I've been in overload all day over the FFVII advent children complete and the FFXIII trailers alllllllll day!! i was hugging my computer at uni i was loving it so much so here!!



while i was waiting for the trailers to load they froze on these scenes....so i took my chance they are beautiful!!! im soooooo excited!!! I'm going to cry when ever Zack is on the screen

Trailers!!!

[link]

[link]

i'm so excited!

OMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMG!!!!
-dies-

Contest. [link]

..: =Em-j-akahana http://Em-j-akahana.deviantart.com/journal/22956273/ http://Em-j-akahana.deviantart.com/journal/22956273/ Mon, 02 Feb 2009 03:19:27 PST Flat buddies!!:


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Remember kids...drinking is good!

Man!! im soooooooo hungover _{woo hoo} BUT!! anyway....THERE'S SNOW OUTSIDE!! ZOMG!! i was stumbling into the flat at 3am last night and there was no snow!! where did it come from? XD it's almost like it fell from the sky .

Oh no!!

I'm a total spazz! i just noticed that my subscription is running out this week and i cant afford another one til maybe next week or so due to just payin rent and car bills ;__; and!! i gave a subscription to a deviant in need recently, just cause i noticed she needed one and i was feeling generous ^^ Help!
i'll be facing adverts for a while

Contest. [link]

..::..

LOKI: Chapter 1 [link] =Em-j-akahana http://Em-j-akahana.deviantart.com/journal/22819959/ http://Em-j-akahana.deviantart.com/journal/22819959/ Fri, 30 Jan 2009 02:46:12 PST Flat buddies!!:


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P.S. brought up the question 'how many entries are allowed to be submitted for this contest?' Submit as many as you want people!! Go nuts if you have more than one idea XD let's get the creativeness flowing!! .

EDIT: oh yeah...if you make and entry could you please note me with the link to it so i can see it and fav it please ^^ thank you!!

Terms and conditions apply...subject to availability.

Alright! Let's have a contest. The rules of the game are:
1. You have to use at least ONE of my characters.
2. Do what ever you want with them seriously any thing goes, draw them with another one of my characters, draw them with your characters, write about them...anything
3. If it helps, use one of these themes as the title:
+ First Meeting
+ Happy bloody Valentine ('cause its coming up ^^)
+ My pet vampire
+ Late night conversations
+ Fun times!!

Feel free to use your own ideas if you have any ^^

Entries wont be judged on how good the art or writting is, it'll be judged on the idea so try and move me ^^ lol ideas can be happy, sad, tragic, bloody morbid XD you all know what i like.

i'll update with prizes soon but i'll be giving out a subscription to the winner and maybe rope a good artist into doing you a request i'll see what i can do
Note me if you have any questions.

You all have ONE month!!

OK!

GO!!

..:http://Em-j-akahana.deviantart.com/journal/22754898/ Fri, 23 Jan 2009 08:16:09 PST Flat buddies!!:


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.

I never know what to say anymore...umm...should i start with how im feeling? Or...is that not very appealing? Should I tell you about my day? Hmm…don’t think it would matter either way. Should I tell you about my art…would you want to be a part…of it? Would I even know where to start? Or should I tell you how much I miss you, the last time I kissed you…ask you about your day though you’re going to tell me anyway…making things harder for me….to know what to say.

…

I think I should say a thank you, to *PianoxLullaby for making Loki a stamp

Thank you very much


I realise that i'm not talking very much on this site anymor, or in my artist comments in my images...but like i said i never know what to say anymore, i trust that if you have anything to ask you wont be scared to just note me or aske when you comment you're all such womderful watchers and i love your support so much...i really need it some times ^^

thanks again.

..::.. =Em-j-akahana http://Em-j-akahana.deviantart.com/journal/22429809/ http://Em-j-akahana.deviantart.com/journal/22429809/ Tue, 06 Jan 2009 08:31:56 PST Flat buddies!!:


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.

I've been thinking, i have no idea what i want to do!! i got my tablet out and i can't decide what i want to try...even though i have hundreds of portraits of my characters still to be finished, but i always do portraits :/ should i be trying to broden my horizons or sticking to what i know?

so yeah, here it comes...the question that i've been trying to avid asking cause everyone on her does it but...

...What would you guys like to see more of from me?

should i stick to using references and doing semi-realism? or should i be trying to do something else? any suggestions? or is there any one character i should be focusing on? let me know if any of you have any feed back ^^ it really helps me decide things lol

Also, the reason i put up my last random post is to find out if it would be worth writting out some of my characters stories. cause i can't do comics and i dont have the patiencce to aniate it all, writting is the only other way i can get a story concept out but i dont think anyone would read it...do you think it would be worth it?

i need to do something i can't believe this was my first drawing of 2009...i hate it i reckon it looks soo childish and boring. i hate not having a good style for things like that...mild grrrr lol

Anyway...rant over! HAPPY NEW YEAR!!! hope it was a good one

..: =Em-j-akahana http://Em-j-akahana.deviantart.com/journal/22157147/ http://Em-j-akahana.deviantart.com/journal/22157147/ Sun, 28 Dec 2008 16:14:06 PST Flat buddies!!:


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Christmas yet to come.

I'm soooooo excited!! Sorry i've not been on DA alot alately (or at all ^^) but i've been taking a break and probably will be on here less and less as the time goes by, BUT!!! i had to stop by and wish everyone a very merry christmas eve!! i'm always in such a christmas spirit, i absolutely love the time of year. i'm looking forward to giving my family and bf their pressies soooooo much i could burst!!


Only problem is i have to work tonight :s which is fine...i've been really really ill the past week so this will be the first time i've been in work for over a week. i've been kinda enjoying not having this shitty job to worry about...i'll need to get me a better one before i cry lol
But i hhave it all planned out! i'm going to walk to work rather than drive, so, that way, i have to walk home in the cold and the wet and how awesome will it be to get all warm by the fire with a cup of tea and wait a few hours for Christmas? it's going to be sooooo cosy if all goes to my plan. the only problem is...my manager will be in tonight and he hates me last time we were both in together he had me in tears over nothing. so prey for me that he'll leave me alone and that my christmas spirit will survive til midnight

anyway, i'll be back tomorrow to wish you all a very merry actual christmas so enjoy your day!!! i love you all!! MERRY CHRISTMAS EVE!! YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYY!!!!!!! WOOOOOOOO!!!!!

.

Did everyone have a good christmas? i hope you all got what you wanted ^^
I'm really bored so i thought i would let you all know i have a chatroom.

[link]

if anyone else is really bored or just wants to chat please feel free to use it

..:http://Em-j-akahana.deviantart.com/journal/21778225/ Tue, 02 Dec 2008 04:57:24 PST Flat buddies!!:


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Special feature.

Random feature.

http://Em-j-akahana.deviantart.com/journal/21711062/ Fri, 28 Nov 2008 07:17:25 PST Flat buddies!!:


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DA Chums:

Special feature.

:

Random feature.

=Em-j-akahana http://Em-j-akahana.deviantart.com/journal/21693180/ http://Em-j-akahana.deviantart.com/journal/21693180/ Thu, 27 Nov 2008 06:36:03 PST Flat buddies!!:


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Thank you for the music.

I finally got round to seeing Mamma mia and i loved it lol I've listened to ABBA since i was a baby cause my mum'n'dad loved them so of course i was going to like the musical. All the people i know from uni hate it most of them either hate ABBA or work in the cinema so they're sick of hearing it...or BOTH! but you know what! i dont care lol!
I'm sitting here with such a smile on my face...even though i was thinking about my dad all the way through it and how he would love to have seen it. But that just makes me happy ^^
If anybody has seen it too and LOVED it then please let me know so i can give you a hug!!

Dancing Queen.

It's my 21st birthday party tomorrow and i'm getting a little excited ^^ i always find it hard to be excited about stuff like this cause i don't know what to do with myself under this sort of attention...so i just plan on putting on my little dress and dancing the night away ^^
There's soooo many people i really care about that can't make it but even more people that i love are going to be there so it should be a great night, i'll make sure of it
i've been working and planning this party and worrying about uni all this week so i apologise again to those people who are waiting for stuff from me...it'll be up Saturday night i promise...cause i'll be hungover AND I HAVE THE NIGHT OFF WORK!! !!

..:http://Em-j-akahana.deviantart.com/journal/21635765/ Mon, 24 Nov 2008 04:10:28 PST Flat buddies!!:


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It's my birthday!!!

yeah, pretty much what the subtitle says....IT'S MY BIRTHDAY!! i'm the dreaded two one!! 21 man!! it feels weird! i'm all grown up
had a beautiful night with my mates and intend on spending most of my birthday at home, before accepting i really should be in uni...then giving up and going to the pub!! i really can't wait!!
I want to wear my purple birthday dress alllllllll day....but it's for my party on friday *pouts* so i have to wait lol.
weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!! i'm so excited lol

OMG!!! BEST THING EVER!!!

IS MY LOVE!!

like a twat face...touched for the very first time

In other new i did the most funniest thing at work the other night cause im such a bimbo -even though i have red hair- i was working away when i nudged something under my till...i moved in to investigate and found a little device i hadn't noticed before. it was like a little grey and black box, with two wee red squared on it :S i could have swarn that the red thing moved inwards so i pressed it again to check and sure enough they did ^^ nothing happened so that was the end of that.
pleased with my new discovery i went on with my work....
....yeah....

...turns out it was the stores panic button about half an hour or so later the police showed up lol
i explained what had happened and they were fine with it, even laughed ab... ]]> =Em-j-akahana http://Em-j-akahana.deviantart.com/journal/21577777/ http://Em-j-akahana.deviantart.com/journal/21577777/ Sat, 22 Nov 2008 06:47:03 PST Flat buddies!!:


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Thank you.

weeey!! thought i wouls do one of these thank you things for pageviews...so, Thanks guys for 20,000 page views!! It all reall means alot to me ^^

For the 100th time i AM alive!

yeah ignore that subtitle XD weeeeeeellll!! it's officially birthday week in my flat!! yesterday was my first flatmates ~narrated birthday and today is my second flatmates *Cooper17 birthday!! so last night we were all very drunk and intend to go back out again tonight XD THEN!! it's the Em-dogs, aka ME!! ...'s birthday on monday!! so we are having a week of fun and very drunk times.
only problem is im soooo skint!! i'm actually in trouble with debt but hey!! this week is important so i'm going to enjoy it
i'm well hungover though...need time to recover before i do it all over again tonight

I got a dress for my own birthday do i'll have the friday after my actual birthday ^^ i feel all girly and yay!! it's gorgeous...it's midnight pruple which is Donny's colour hmmm...puts girly images of Donny in my head oh dear
Anyway!! yeah im excited but scared

Halloween was fun!! i was soooooooo drunk!! i drank far too fast and got into much trouble times with my boyfriend but all is well now ^^ i went as ugly bob from south park 9give yourself a gold star if you know who that is cause not many people did ) ...even though i was gutted i couldn't go as Donny
i'll just dress up as him randomly one day just for going to the shops for bread XDXD lol

ah good times =Em-j-akahana http://Em-j-akahana.deviantart.com/journal/21394132/ http://Em-j-akahana.deviantart.com/journal/21394132/ Sat, 08 Nov 2008 19:27:59 PST People who have fed me:


DA Chums:

I don't feel well.

Have you ever not felt yourself?
like you're numb to your own body. just sitting about watching things pass by, like very other cliche there is about feeling depressed?
have you ever gazed up at the stars and felt to crushingly insignificant that you just stand for ages and cry like a twat?
have you ever been so hungry...but no matter what you eat, it wont satisfy...nothing has any taste...
so thirsty that no amount of drinking will quench it...
so sick...so tired that you start to see shadows, tiny little lights that race aross the room just out of your direct line of sight?
have you ever listened to yourself and felt so repulsed that you wanted to die?
have you ever loved someone so much that not being with them is like your own personal hell, tormented...broken...weighed down by so much emotion that you just switch off.
unable to sleep.
unable to think clearly.
missing someone so much it makes everything around you seem dry and empty. your mind rotting away.
becoming so paranoid that you loose sense of who you are...
...of who other people are.
have you ever felt so lonely you wanted to rip everybody you knew to pieces as punishment for letting you get this bad?
watching the blood pour just to satisfy a sick lust bubbling away in the back of your fucking insane little mind.
have you ever been so sick of people acusing you of being off your face on drugs just cause you're happy and bubbley and they're not?
just because you have something to smile about!
just cause their pathetic lives are too shit for them to bare!!
Have you ever felt trapped?
Held down?
Held back?
Suffocated.


but...at the same time, have you ever just wanted to make everyone happy? not just the people you know but total strangers too.
has the simplest of gestures from another made you so happy you feel like you could never be sad again? like in that one moment you're the most loved person on the planet.

lol

have you ever sounded so silly you could laugh?

..::..... ]]> =Em-j-akahana http://Em-j-akahana.deviantart.com/journal/21370016/ http://Em-j-akahana.deviantart.com/journal/21370016/ Fri, 07 Nov 2008 09:21:16 PST People who have fed me:


DA Chums:

The Emma News at 10!

please check this guy out he's so lovely ---- [link]

bblllleeeaaaaauuuuurrrggghhh!!

i'm so tired!! for no reason!! lol
it's funny ^^ in a naff way

Hope everybody had a great halloween! i know i sure did! best time of the year ^^
i'm a bit behind on my drawing and stuff lately but hopefully i'll catch up soon...

...my brain isn't really functioning right now
not just with drawing but with uni work aswell, i really need to start doing some serious amount of work soon otherwise the only other option is to shoot myself in the head


hope you're all having a good day.

...

zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Featured! 'Cause they made me happy.

=Em-j-akahana http://Em-j-akahana.deviantart.com/journal/21221446/ http://Em-j-akahana.deviantart.com/journal/21221446/ Wed, 29 Oct 2008 17:42:11 PDT People who have fed me:


DA Chums:

The Cat!!

please check this guy out he's so lovely ---- [link]

via

If you comment I'll give you a letter of the alphabet and you have to make a journal and list TEN THINGS you like starting with the letter I give you.

My letter H.

1) Hip-hop-opotamus (my lyrics are bottomless)
2) Happy, people
3) Harry Enfield
4) Hide and seek
5) Hail
6) Halloween
7) Hallucinations
8) Hitler!! & Cosby!
9) Hands
10) Handcuffs

Deleted scenes.
Harmonicas, Harvesting (souls), Hats, Hedgehogs, Hercules (Disney), Hermaphrodites, Herpes (www.got herpes.com), Hiccups, High Heels, Holidays, Homosexuals, Hoodies, Hookers, Hopscotch, Holley, Hose, Hugging , Horses, Hunger, Habitual abortion, Hmmmm....maybe i should stop there getting carried away now

..::..

writting: http://Em-j-akahana.deviantart.com/journal/21182875/ Mon, 27 Oct 2008 13:35:37 PDT People who have fed me:


DA Chums:

Freak out.

[link]

ok...............ok.........ok...ok....ok.............ok

yeeeaaaaah i'm not happy

Am i ever happy anymore? I was going to go as Donny for halloween this year but due to lack of fundings i can't make it work and make it look good and i don't want to be going looking really half assed...*sighs*

So i'm going to have to think up something else and pull it all together in like 3 days...don't know if i've got it in me man!!

Also i'm in uni right now...and all my motivation for anything all gone! i was really up for doing a whole of stuff for my course today but as soon as i got here and sat down it all vanished *pouts*

I really don't know what's wrong with me but i wish i would get better 'cause i'm going to make myself ill with worry.

It's not kool...but hey i'll get something together...hopefully soon. i'll just draw myself silly 'til i figure myself out.

Plus i think i'm hungry lol gona go get something *omnomnomnom*

I think there's something wrong with me.

I keep falling asleep. i just woke up...its been happening alot these past few days, i'll just put my head down for a moment and pass out and this is coming from the girl who can't sleep...ever! maybe it's all finally catching up with me

..::..

writting: http://Em-j-akahana.deviantart.com/journal/21106173/ Thu, 23 Oct 2008 03:34:50 PDT People who have fed me:


DA Chums:

Worries.

Have you ever worried that something big is coming your way...and even though you've been wanting something to happen completely out of boredom, you can't help but think that what ever is heading your way is going to be so bad it's going to knock you sideways? Seems to be happening a lot lately...

Anyway i needed a change...hence the journal. Needed something a bit more neat and calming. ^^ If only i could make the inside of my head the same lol

Emma FTF!!!

Weeeeeeeeeeelllllllllll it turns out that everything around me is falling apart. I haven't recieved my loan through for uni yet and iv been trying to get in touch with folk for months to try and find out why! i finally got through today and it turns out they sent me the wrong form...heh, how wonderful! oh and they also sent me a letter saying i got the wrong form and that i should get the right form and fill it in...how nice of them...only i never recieved any such fucking letter!! and now im out of pocket for what could be another month...wonderous! I don't know if you can tell but im pretty fucking happy right now!!

Not able to register for uni! Not able to afford rent! I swear i need a fucking break!! or all this worry will be the death of me!

..::..

writting:

dWarped<... ]]> =Em-j-akahana http://Em-j-akahana.deviantart.com/journal/21079105/ http://Em-j-akahana.deviantart.com/journal/21079105/ Mon, 20 Oct 2008 12:47:34 PDT DO IT!!!! GO CHECK OUT OUR VAMPIRE PROJECT FOR OUR CREATIVE VIDEO 2 COURSE IT MAKES ME SMILE!!!! :[link]

NOTE ME for a commission ^^ commissioner

People who have fed me:


DA Chums:

Even more ramblings from a very ill mind.

I'm finally full...after so long of what seemed like neverending emptyness i can lie back on the couch and take a deep breath...knowing i don't have to worry about standing up, only to get dizzy and feel so sick i have to sit back down. I had to stop work the other night, half an hour before the store closed i had to take a moment...any longer on my feet and i would have actually collapsed. But right now i feel oddly...content. In the flat myself struggling to find the want to achieve anything more...i have suceeded in my day. I lived through it.
I close my eyes and fall backwards, plumiting into my imagination, a much better place...still full of dark, foul weather...but you're there too...and you're happy. We're all happy. laughing. calm and clear...like the sky hanging over, like a scratch on my shoulder...that i no longer feel. lyrics from that song i love running through my head...as you hum it back to me. contradictions everywhere partnered with conundrums, dancing like lovers. speaking in languages i don't understand but don't try to learn...but it doesn't matter. 'Cause I'm so very happy.

But that's not how it works is it? I have so much work i should be doing and the more time i spend enjoying my imagination the further behind the year i fall.
What am i doing?
Why do i keep doing this to myself?
I sit on here and stare at nothing, doing nothing, addicted...to nothing. Is it even possible to get addicted to nothing? waiting for something to happen only to be sitting for hours watching a blank screen...knowing nothing is going to happen, but forever hopeful...foolishly hopeful. needing a paur of arms around me and a strong word in my ear.

Until then, however...I'll still be sitting here...singing at the top of my lungs!

Mini Dontas gallery!

=Em-j-akahana http://Em-j-akahana.deviantart.com/journal/20998340/ http://Em-j-akahana.deviantart.com/journal/20998340/ Wed, 15 Oct 2008 08:31:15 PDT DO IT!!!! GO CHECK OUT OUR VAMPIRE PROJECT FOR OUR CREATIVE VIDEO 2 COURSE IT MAKES ME SMILE!!!! :[link]

NOTE ME for a commission ^^ commissioner

Chums:

...

...is a special time in a boys life when he is faced with the responsibility of becoming what he was made to be...facing up to his creator, taking a step back and swtiching off...disengaging from his own mind, his own beliefs, his own principles and moral and living souly by his instincts and desires...

...to become what he was created to become...a reflection, a projection, the very image of his creator...all the passion, all the fear, all the love, all the desire...all the lust of the person behind him...constantly questioning...denouncing all others...now, and forever...

he is empty...he is nothing...meaningless...a shell to be placed and moved...he is not himself, therefore...he is not alive...and yet he would die for you...he would hold you and love you...he would give his pathetic soul for you...bleed himself dry...forsake all others just to hold you...to feel you...to taste you...your smell...your skin...they all belong to him now...they all belong to me...

he is my puppet.

and i fucking love him!

Mini Dontas gallery!

http://Em-j-akahana.deviantart.com/journal/20885589/ Sun, 12 Oct 2008 07:06:35 PDT DO IT!!!! GO CHECK OUT OUR VAMPIRE PROJECT FOR OUR CREATIVE VIDEO 2 COURSE IT MAKES ME SMILE!!!! :[link]

NOTE ME for a commission ^^ commissioner

Chums:

Relight my fire?

Hmmm...I seem to have hit a wall. I might be experiencing some form of block!! ZOMG!! what do i do?
lol
Does anyone have anything to inspire me?

I need a creative kick up the arse.

err...

...*rest of journal pending*

Odd Cravings.

It's been brought to my attention lately....again, that my blood obsession is, and i quote, 'freaky'.
But...
...it's me!! and i love it!!
I've been in a very bloody mood lately and i'm very open and sooooo comfortable with it that i forget that other people aren't lol
there's alot of reasons i want to give for the whole happy blood times but i know for a fact i will freak people out so i'm going to leave it to your imaginations please leave any ideas you may have as comments i'm interested

Also on a related note...
[link]


hmmm...i'm hungry...

Mini Dontas gallery!

... ]]> =Em-j-akahana http://Em-j-akahana.deviantart.com/journal/20812879/ http://Em-j-akahana.deviantart.com/journal/20812879/ Fri, 03 Oct 2008 17:31:17 PDT DO IT!!!! GO CHECK OUT OUR VAMPIRE PROJECT FOR OUR CREATIVE VIDEO 2 COURSE IT MAKES ME SMILE!!!! :[link]

NOTE ME for a commission ^^ commissioner

Chums:

Mini Dontas gallery!

He's ribbed for your pleasure.

:STAMPS:

=Em-j-akahana http://Em-j-akahana.deviantart.com/journal/20780295/ http://Em-j-akahana.deviantart.com/journal/20780295/ Wed, 01 Oct 2008 16:27:37 PDT DO IT!!!! GO CHECK OUT OUR VAMPIRE PROJECT FOR OUR CREATIVE VIDEO 2 COURSE IT MAKES ME SMILE!!!! :[link]

NOTE ME for a commission ^^ commissioner

Chums:

i has a big journal!

Tagged again!!! lol by

this is a weird one

HUMAN/CREATOR

-What's your full name?
errrrrm...Em-j Hillary the Giant III

-What's your nickname?
Em-j and other such alias-ass-asses

-When's your birthday?
24th november

-What's your favorite color?
Blue, and every other colour!

-What do you hate most?
walls

-What do you love most?
My VAMPIRE!!!

-What are your favorite creatures?
Bats...and err...children

-Do you watch cartoons?
yes

-What's the dumbest thing you've ever done?
everything

-Wow, you're pretty stupid...
wow! and you're an asswhole!!

-Which one of your characters do you like most?
Donny! Dontas...Donny!

-Which one would you trash?
none of them!!!

-What would you do if someone stole your work?
beat them!! beat them hard!! with shoes! smaller children!!

-What are your views on online dating?
i ate paper once

-What kind of people do you like?
anyone who has at one point fed me

-Would you still be nice to a boring deviant?
i'm 'nice' to everyone wait! does that make me sound easy?

-What would you do if someone flamed you?
hmmm...beat them?

NOW FOR YOUR CHARACTER:

-Hi
...? Where am i?

-What's your name?
err... *bows slightly* My name is Dontas. It is a pleasure...

-How old are you?
...umm...I am 88, i guess...

-What species are you?
Vampire.

-Are you male or female?
Heh. I am male. ^^

-If you had to chose just one place to live for the rest of your life, where would it be?
Hmmm...I don't really mind. Just as long as i have someone to share it with i'll be content. ^^

-how creative do you think your human/creator is?
Um...who?

-C... ]]> =Em-j-akahana http://Em-j-akahana.deviantart.com/journal/20763092/ http://Em-j-akahana.deviantart.com/journal/20763092/ Tue, 30 Sep 2008 16:26:14 PDT DO IT!!!! GO CHECK OUT OUR VAMPIRE PROJECT FOR OUR CREATIVE VIDEO 2 COURSE IT MAKES ME SMILE!!!! :[link]

NOTE ME for a commission ^^ commissioner

Chums:

i has a big journal!

AYYYYYEEEEE!!

i am back in the house mo-fo!! sorry i've not been to active lately but i've been distracted. that's me back at uni and already i'm fucked :S
but hopefully not for long, just ned to figure out what i want to do for my dissertation i swear, everytime i come up with an idea that i think might be good enough, my lecturer gives me this look like...'errr, mmmmm...you sure that's a good idea?' and i'm left thinking my ideas are crap!! urgh! but it's ok, i'm meeting with him again on Friday, so hopefully i'll have something good for him then.

Also!! urm...i actually don't have that much to report so i will do this!!! ~~~~

tagged by

Rules of the Game:
Choose a singer/band/group.
Answer using only titles of songs by that singer/band/group.
Tag 6 more people.



Answers from Take That!!!:

1. Are you male or female?:
It only takes a minute girl.

2. How would you describe yourself?:
Babe

3. What do people feel when they're around you?:
Could it be magic?

4. How would you describe your previous relationship?:
Love ain't here anymore

5. How would you describe your current relationship?:
I found Heaven, A million Love songs, Beautiful World

6. Where would you want to be now?:
Mancunian Way

7. How do you feel about love?:
Sure

8. What's your life like?:
Like i never loved you at all.

9. What would you ask for if you had only one wish?:
Patience

10. Say something wise:
Hold on...Never Forget...Everything Changes.

Hehe
i tag

one more tag left to go

So!! how's all you people?

:STAMPS:

http://Em-j-akahana.deviantart.com/journal/20651309/ Wed, 24 Sep 2008 12:44:29 PDT DO IT!!!! GO CHECK OUT OUR VAMPIRE PROJECT FOR OUR CREATIVE VIDEO 2 COURSE IT MAKES ME SMILE!!!! :[link]

NOTE ME for a commission ^^ commissioner

Chums:

i has a big journal!

Rules:
1. Answer the questions, homeslice.
2. Tag 9 people.

--
1. Name the three things that bother you the most (about anything).

tha foct that i cen't spell for fook! the little cap on beer bottles (it stops me from gettin to my beer...until i ask an adult to help me), the sun.

2. Name the first thing you see about people (physically).

their ' personality '

3. Name the first thing you notice about people (mentally).

normally if they're carrying food, i like that

4. Favorite band(s)?

that guy, cooper, jack morgan etc

5. What song(s) can you relate to the most?

'Emma' by Her mum,
'she's a redhead' by Cuts me Sally
and
'Talks like a Scot' by Scotch Mist

6. Favorite color?

Backwards

7. Favorite animal?

bat I'M SO HAPPY!!

8. Favorite quote (can be from a song.).

GUTTEN ABEND!!

9. Favorite food?

babies

10. Favorite drink?

the freshly squeezed juice of the gooramba-da plant

i tag!!!

1. Bob Dole! Bob Dole!!
2. Madonna
3.. Bob II
4.. Darth
5.. a sheep
6.. the planet Uranus
7.. the wee man on the Irn Bru can
8.. Yar MAW!!!
9.. and finally, number one influential gay man...Sir Ian Mckellen

:STAMPS:

http://Em-j-akahana.deviantart.com/journal/20543051/ Wed, 17 Sep 2008 18:42:16 PDT DO IT!!!! GO CHECK OUT OUR VAMPIRE PROJECT FOR OUR CREATIVE VIDEO 2 COURSE IT MAKES ME SMILE!!!! :[link]

NOTE ME for a commission ^^ commissioner

Chums:

Shit times

yeah not having the greatest of times right now, got yelled at by my boss and the likes the other day for missing a shift, even though my supervisor told me it wasn't a problem and stoof apparently i wasn'y the only one pulled up about stuff that day though but still...he didn't stop 'til i was upset and as soon as he saw the tears in my eyes he left, told me i had five minutes to pull myself together then i was to get my till
I know that i was bad of me to miss my shift but he didnt havee to say half the stuff he did, he basically called me incompetent, a silly little girl that has a serious attitude problem and needs to sort herself out. then he contradicted himself by saying i was a big enough 'woman' to look after my own time and shifts. he even asked me what i wanted to do with my life and said i would be no good at it cause i would just miss all my shifts!! what a prick!! i was sooo mad that i couldn't just yell at him i broke down and now i feel like a right twat

not to mention my nightmares have come back. i've had three this week alone and it's really not fun. one was so bad i thought it was still happening even after i woke up luckily i was at my bf's so i had someone there to tell me it was all just a dream but i was pretty feaked out.

there's other more personal stuff that's wrong but i don't think it's all fit for a DA journal lol

guess i'm just scared of alot of things right now, i'm going into my last year of uni and that's pretty scarey :s and i'm scared i'm loosing someone very close to me and i would just be lost without her. she's probably the best friend i've ever had but i just seem to know every button to push to wind her up and i really don't mean it.

aye. well...there has been one good thing to come out of this week ^^ apart from getting to spen some time with my mum (which is always awesome)...

...i got a wee gift from the wonderful



it's of my character Nikko hehe. Please go and give some love for me http://Em-j-akahana.deviantart.com/journal/20402300/ Tue, 09 Sep 2008 06:12:20 PDT DO IT!!!! GO CHECK OUT OUR VAMPIRE PROJECT FOR OUR CREATIVE VIDEO 2 COURSE IT MAKES ME SMILE!!!! :[link]

NOTE ME for a commission ^^ commissioner

Chums:

Love you

i want to say a big thank you to all the people who took part in my last pole i really needed some cheering up and those notes made me smile ^^ so here's a mini featur of all those who noted me and cheered me up ^^

thank you again