http://search.deviantart.com/?q=by:Eternal-41269&section=today deviantART RSS for by:Eternal-41269 en-us Copyright 2009, deviantART.com Sun, 06 Dec 2009 19:13:18 PST deviantART.com http://blogs.law.harvard.edu/tech/rss http://s.deviantart.com/minish/widgets/apple-touch-icon-precomposed.png http://Eternal-41269.deviantart.com/journal/28306517/ http://Eternal-41269.deviantart.com/journal/28306517/ Thu, 12 Nov 2009 03:51:15 PST
It was really interesting to go see what industry professionals had to say, although it was a very long day and at one point I found myself drifting off when somebody came on about 'the future of gaming', as I didn't really see what point he was getting across. It was more like 'this is how things are' compared to 'this is how things will be', so didn't provide any new information. He just dressed up a few points about designing for technology and not pushing something which an audience isn't ready for with big words if you ask me.

What I was most excited for was the talk by Charles Cecil from Revolution. I'm a big Broken Sword fan, so I honestly felt a little awe stuck. I wanted to go over and say something to him and his fellow workers at the end, but honestly didn't know what to say. Better to be thought a fool by staying silient then to be confirmed one by opening my mouth, or something like that anyways lol.

A couple of the people we were supposed to see were cancelled, which was disapointing. But we still had Revolution and Blueberry Gardens Erik, so I saw what I most wanted to see.

]]> ~Eternal-41269 http://Eternal-41269.deviantart.com/journal/27851547/ http://Eternal-41269.deviantart.com/journal/27851547/ Mon, 19 Oct 2009 10:44:29 PDT
Over the weekend I set myself up a twitter and also a YouTube account relating to my work anyways;
[link]
[link]

I do have good news in that my landlord has agreed that I can have my dog over for a week whilest my parents are away on holiday however. I know it'll be great, but now I'm stressing over the extra time she'll take up giving her walks, ARG! I'm still excited that I get to look after her though, I miss her real bad being here. I love how excited she gets when I go home, makes a person feel loved lol.

]]> ~Eternal-41269 http://Eternal-41269.deviantart.com/journal/27404626/ http://Eternal-41269.deviantart.com/journal/27404626/ Fri, 25 Sep 2009 06:12:33 PDT

Thankfully my loan came through on time so that I can pay the rest of the rent I owe. I felt slightly guilty about not having all the money on time, especially when I'm bugging the landlord about the shower, which has took to constantly running. Hopefully somebody will come and fix it and the temperature control today so I can finally get a proper shower.

I start proper lessons on Monday, even if I don't have my timetable yet. I am really nervous about it and self-doubt about if this is the course for me is creeping back in. I want to do something in the creative field, but if animating is the thing I want at the end I'm not so sure anymore. I guess I'm just dissapointed at my lack of progess, but at the same time I should have got my thumb out more this summer and practised. With everything going on with my Dad, I've found it harder then usual to get motivated.

About my Dad anyways is that he is finally home again. His last lot of treatment made him really ill, and although he's nowhere near feeling like his old self, he'd at least on the mend and eating, as he didn't eat anything for over two weeks whilest in hospical.

]]> ~Eternal-41269 http://Eternal-41269.deviantart.com/journal/27014006/ http://Eternal-41269.deviantart.com/journal/27014006/ Fri, 04 Sep 2009 11:56:47 PDT
It's going to take some ajustments, such as doing my weekly shop with someone who's halfing the bill (which actually means I buy less) will get old pretty quickly, but at least I should eat better, rather then £1 ready meals full of crap thats made me put on a stone of weight this past year

He's going out tonight, which means I get my own space, but it's a little odd having a whole house to myself at the moment. Even at my parents of years of them going out every saturday, I never got used to that, I guess I'm just a wuss when it comes to the dark XD

]]> ~Eternal-41269 http://Eternal-41269.deviantart.com/journal/26624464/ http://Eternal-41269.deviantart.com/journal/26624464/ Sun, 16 Aug 2009 08:23:43 PDT

I just feel really frustrated lately with my artwork too, whenever I start something it turns out bad right from the beginning and as such I've really lost all focus. Just seeing everybody elses art-work and how far people have come in such a short time whilest I'm still stuck where I was 3, 4 years ago is realy getting me down. I know that I should pick myself up, quit complaining and get practising, but I'm finding that more difficult then usual at the moment. I'm starting to get a hatred for people with natural talent lol. Everything always seems to take me twice as long to catch up and I'm so afriad that in this business of artwork and animation I'm well and truely screwed.

I'm hoping that once university starts again, and when we have our Visual Studies classes at least then I'll be picking up a pencil again. I am so so scared however as I really can not remember how to use the programs we used last year, and I know we're going to be more bombed out with work this time round.

AHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!

Anyways, Eternal's going to try and pick herself back up and draw something now, but I don't expect it'll turn out good. I know that I just need one piece I'm vaguly proud of to get me back in the mood for this sort of stuff, but I've no idea when that will come about.

]]> ~Eternal-41269 http://Eternal-41269.deviantart.com/journal/26149931/ http://Eternal-41269.deviantart.com/journal/26149931/ Fri, 24 Jul 2009 11:54:42 PDT
The unhappiness of Chloe dying has now gone away into faint heart-ache. I still think about her alot, but usually about the good things that made me laugh. I remember how she used to launch her-self at doors to try and get into rooms an then you'd hear this frustrated meow. She was certainly a persistant one XD

My Dad can't have his operation anymores due to how close the tumour is to his wind-pipe. He will now be having five weeks of radiotherophy, with two weeks of chemo inside that which he starts next week. The doctors seems posistive that this is the best way to go without causing long-term complications.

As for myself I've been spending far too much time online lately. I don't really have the motivation to do much else. I keep thinking about things I want to draw, but just can't seem to get the idea's on paper. I have thought of a couple of random sketchbook projects I want to do however, it's just I don't have the sketchbooks to do it!

I've also been looking at fur-suits alot (*sniff* the expense!), and generally thinking alot about my furry side. I always considered other people I knew to be them an never gave it much thought until recently when I look back at my life an my reaction to certain things and realise I do fit into that category. It's a kind of relief to have something positive about myself to hold onto, but also abit wierd, as I know other people can find it strange or think your into yiffing, which well, lets not even get into that one lol.

I've not been sleeping well lately, which I'm sure is half of what's making me unmotivated. I've just been very restless. The other night I woke up and my sleepy brain didn't reconise my own room and I had a minor panic for about 5 seconds, which was odd and also gives you an idea of my sleep lately and how I'm falling asleep during the day.

]]> ~Eternal-41269 http://Eternal-41269.deviantart.com/journal/25578893/ http://Eternal-41269.deviantart.com/journal/25578893/ Sat, 27 Jun 2009 00:42:10 PDT Yestaday was no exception.

As you know I went on holiday last week, it started out irratating as the sat-nav wouldn't work and we ended up having to re-buy the maps, but then all was fine and I've had five an a half days of fun, visiting lots of animal places, playing crazy golf and the weather was wonderful all week.

Then when I got back my PC had lost ALL of it's files (which are thankfully back now), but the real bummer is that whilest we were away Daniels cat, Chloe, passed away. She ment alot to me and it's just going to be so so wierd without her being around. Yestaday I watched all the videos I had of her on my phone, which I think are the only videos of her that exsist and it really helped. We'd known that she wasn't right for months now, but after the vet saw her and gave her some medication she seemed to pick up and started eating again an was more active, but then just got worse again, but differently as she could barely walk properly and smelled really bad. Having her ill for so long and knowing how old she was (around 21) helped me prepare, but it was still such a shock and so so horrid when I got told. Just so horrid for it to be final.

R.I.P Chloe cat, we'll miss you.

]]> ~Eternal-41269 http://Eternal-41269.deviantart.com/journal/25365064/ http://Eternal-41269.deviantart.com/journal/25365064/ Wed, 17 Jun 2009 02:26:27 PDT
It feels rather strange however, since I know I may not see people for quite awhile and at least then not regular, feels strange as it was my last day at Storthes, handing in that key felt like it should have been different, like there should have been relief, but I just felt a tad nostelgic in it's place. I remember that first night there, crying my eyes out stating how I couldn't live there for a year, but dispite the down's there was up's and I liked that little room, if not all the noise that went on around it.

But anyways I go on holiday next week and I feel like it's Christmas, I'm just so giddy and even though I'm not a kid anymore and I know that amusements and fairgrounds don't hold the same appeal as they once did I'm still giddy for that feeling of being on holiday.

]]> ~Eternal-41269 http://Eternal-41269.deviantart.com/journal/25100224/ http://Eternal-41269.deviantart.com/journal/25100224/ Wed, 03 Jun 2009 02:32:19 PDT
Once again I have something to look forward to which is keeping my spirits up which is a possible holiday away with Dan. We are hoping to go away to Great Yarmouth at the end of the month, just waiting to see if Daniel can really offord it and if he can get that week off work. I'm crossing all parts of me that can be crossed however as I haven't had a proper holiday away since I started going out with Dan (three years!) and I was used to going away twice a year before that. It would be so nice to get away somewhere and forget about the world for five days.

In art related news I think someone must have cursed me. I really can't draw anything lately. It's like I've forgotton how and it's just very frustrating having time on my hands and not doing anything constructive with it. It also does not help either that birds have taken to singing outside my window at 4:30 in a morning. If it's not bad enough that they bug me all day that they also wake me up so early too!

]]> ~Eternal-41269 http://Eternal-41269.deviantart.com/journal/24140558/ http://Eternal-41269.deviantart.com/journal/24140558/ Thu, 09 Apr 2009 03:22:10 PDT
I'm trying to remind myself that worrying wont help anything though and I guess because I do have things to look forward to and everyones being supportive that this is making it easier, so for all you guys that have said that they're sorry and have offered words of comfort, thankyou.

Things I have to look forward to, even though there's nothing planned is that Saturday will be mine an Daniel's third year together and the week after that will be my birthday, not countng easter of course. I already have my present from my parents which is a new 20inch widescreen monitor, which is making me want to be something photoshop, so hopefully art from me soon.

]]> ~Eternal-41269 http://Eternal-41269.deviantart.com/journal/23638909/ http://Eternal-41269.deviantart.com/journal/23638909/ Wed, 11 Mar 2009 07:11:54 PDT
Ah damn, this movie is so good. I'd finished reading the graphic novel just the day before I went to see it, and loved that they'd kept alot of the original lines. To compare it to another set of films, X-men, I love those, but Watchmen kicks the crap outa Xmen any day. It's far more serious, far darker, and requires a certain matureness to watch, considering the character Jon walks around stalk nakid for most of the film. Just look at the Comedian character, and that should tell you all you need to know about the themes of this film.
Most definately my new craze, I'd encourage anybody to go out and read the comic, it's wonderfully written.
Only one small part irked me about the film, I realy can't say anything without spoiling the ending though. It's quite a small change which I guess made sence, but it still irked me XD They had Bubastis in it however, a geneticly altered big cat, so that more then makes up for it for me

]]> ~Eternal-41269 http://Eternal-41269.deviantart.com/journal/23235536/ http://Eternal-41269.deviantart.com/journal/23235536/ Mon, 16 Feb 2009 13:10:54 PST
Preferably I'd like to draw animals and your characters. Uni permitting. . .I just need to get into the rountine of drawing, dooderling an to not be ashamed of sitting and drawing of the top of my head in front of other people.

]]> ~Eternal-41269 http://Eternal-41269.deviantart.com/journal/22956476/ http://Eternal-41269.deviantart.com/journal/22956476/ Mon, 02 Feb 2009 02:49:32 PST Usually snow lately has been just slush or ice but this is the kind you chrush though, it's partly great, but partly sucks as for one I can't get into university. A bus got stuck and that was all the information I needed to stay away, I don't want to get suck in huddersfield with no way back. I saw a car this morning so no way would a taxi get me back either!
My main worry however is that I'm going to be stuck on my own, I'm supposed to be meeting Bagh on wednesday, I've no idea when she'll next be this close to me and to think that I'll miss it, well it's not good

]]> ~Eternal-41269 http://Eternal-41269.deviantart.com/journal/22367329/ http://Eternal-41269.deviantart.com/journal/22367329/ Sat, 03 Jan 2009 04:26:38 PST
I started 2008 being at collage, studying foundation art and design with people, especially one person who I swore not to loose contact with, yet have ended up doing so anyways.
Now I've for all extant and purposes I have moved out, even if I still consider my parents house my home and am a good 30 minutes drive away from anything I am familar and secure about. Okay so 30 minutes isn't the end of the world but it does make a big difference to me an my boyfriend's relationship, to go from seeing each other almost every night to max 3 times a week where everything has to be planned out, that can be difficult and so very lonely sometimes.

Another change is also my friend's child, Ebony. My gosh has she grown, developed her own personality, gotten cheeky, amazing what a year can do.

Or can't. I swore to myself that I'm be more upbeat last year, that was my new years resolution. I've totally failed at being more positive, even some good times are starting to feel, 'fake'. If I didn't have the people at university to look forward to seeing, I don't know what my mental state would be as it's already screwed up enough as is. I just wish I knew 100% what I wanted to do and that I could believe I could obtain that. Being giddy with excitement one moment and then so down I could cry within a couple of minutes constantly has got my head in such a whirl. . . so I guess my new years resolution this year is to sort out that problem and I guess that's why I'm writing this so that people that know me can understand that.

So I guess not the most upbeat journal entry ever, but hopefully by next year I'll feel alot better about myself and the direction of my life. AND have alot more art-work and heaven knows I need the practise XXD

]]> ~Eternal-41269 http://Eternal-41269.deviantart.com/journal/21943300/ http://Eternal-41269.deviantart.com/journal/21943300/ Fri, 12 Dec 2008 07:33:57 PST
I'm quite bored at being at uni and need a change of pace, even though I know I'm going to miss the people there, we've been having so much fun with all our cancelled lessons lol.
The other day we went and played rock band 2, ah it was funny, I felt like a actual drummer XXD

Hope everybody has a good day come the 25th and over new years!

]]> ~Eternal-41269 http://Eternal-41269.deviantart.com/journal/21335351/ http://Eternal-41269.deviantart.com/journal/21335351/ Wed, 05 Nov 2008 07:34:32 PST
Damn flat-mates being noisy and keeping me up til 4, but hey that's a different matter.

At least uni is going pretty well, made some ace friends and work not going too bad (even if everytime I look at someones elses I think 'darmn!' lol). My studio project is stressful, not to mention mondays being boring as hell but otherwise the people there make me laugh.
Buses are evil however, I always feel so ill on them coming back, possibly due to sitting on the top-deck. . .so yeah okay maybe I still have issues in my life XD But otherwise it's not so bad, I just wish I could sleep properly right now.

]]> ~Eternal-41269