http://search.deviantart.com/?q=by:EvilAuthor&section=today deviantART RSS for by:EvilAuthor en-us Copyright 2009, deviantART.com Mon, 30 Nov 2009 11:45:30 PST deviantART.com http://blogs.law.harvard.edu/tech/rss http://s.deviantart.com/minish/widgets/apple-touch-icon-precomposed.png http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/28621561/ http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/28621561/ Sat, 28 Nov 2009 00:21:44 PST
But...well, she's my sister. Like...my ONLY sister. So naturally I'm a tad obsessed with her wedding. I've been watching wedding themed shows like "Say Yes to the Dress" and paying more attention when "Ace of Cakes" does wedding cakes.

Jess has been dating this guy for five years. She's been ready for this a long while and now that it's happening, everyone's all "YAY!"

...And yeah, it's making ME want to do the whole wedding dress thing too. I have a dress design and everything...What? I'm a girl!



Just don't tell my boyfriend, okay?



Anyway, yeah. So my little big sister is getting married and that's just the most awesome thing ever. In May...or maybe early June, I'll be posting pictures of the wedding and such.

]]> ~EvilAuthor http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/28145494/ http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/28145494/ Wed, 04 Nov 2009 15:31:36 PST
HOWEVER, mice running free through my apartment, I do not love.

Today, Anthony told me there was a mouse in his room. My first reaction was to freak out...Especially since he didn't know where it went. Before we located it, I was hopping back and forth only keeping one foot on the ground at a time. At soon as we found the mouse, it was all "AWWWW! He's so cute! Look at that nose."

Then the mouse ran away and I squealed and jumped back a foot...he ran AWAY from me and I did this.

After trying to find him, we finally saw the mouse had gone under Anthony's desk. Once he was cornered, I thought he was cute again. We took a long box and blocked off his escape and piled phone books on top of it for weight and to prevent little openings.


I went to Walmart and after a very long search, I found the ONLY "no kill" trap they had. I baited it with caramel and stuck it under the desk for him. I hope he likes it.



Now that he's trapped and the trap is in place, I'm kinda tempted to run down to the pet store and buy a cage and a little wheel.

His name is Yuki and he will be my Yuki until I release him in the field down the street.


UPDATE:

Yesterday morning at 8am, I took Yuki to the field and set him free. I was going to take his picture, as I was requested to do, but once the trap was opened for him, he bolted out and disappeared into the grass never to be seen again.

I was pleased to note that he ate all the caramel I used as bait. Glad to see he liked it. God speed, Yuki. May you live a long mouse life free of owls and cats.

]]> ~EvilAuthor http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/27898683/ http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/27898683/ Wed, 21 Oct 2009 23:46:51 PDT
Anyway, I need game ideas. I have a few games I know I want to buy, but since I didn't have the right system for it, there's a ton of game announcements I ignored.

So I KNOW I need Little Big Planet. What else do my friends recommend to me?


I'm also getting The Proposal on dvd. The blu ray version has an alternate ending.

]]> ~EvilAuthor http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/27754413/ http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/27754413/ Tue, 13 Oct 2009 22:26:41 PDT
My boyfriend's nephew turned one a few weeks ago and he's teething. And I'm kinda teething...So I have something in common with a baby. We've been bonding over this.



So...between the annoyance I'm feeling from the "Brain Required" journal on y!Gal and the fact my mouth is in pain, I was hoping for distractions.

Preferably in the form of art. Or ice cream, but you'd have to live in Portland to give me ice cream.

You don't have to or anything, my birthday is still months away. This is just me making a puppy face at you.

]]> ~EvilAuthor http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/27678685/ http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/27678685/ Fri, 09 Oct 2009 23:56:36 PDT
Anyway, I have several costume ideas I want to do and I'm not sure what I want to do first. SOOOO...I'll ask everyone to help me pick what to do next.

Here are the current options based on my current skill/funds available.

[01] Sailor V: Either Sailor V or Princess Venus
[00] Nekozawa: Black robe and black wig is the main goal, but I will also be making his school ID later on if I can find more information
[00] Black Canary: Her classic costume as shown on JL: Unlimited
[00] Jenova's Witness: Complete with pink cat ears and pamplets to hand out
[00] Kicked Up Tinkerbell: Based on Kingdom Hearts design found in my favorites.



Please Vote in comments. I'd like to try to have a new costume by Sakuracon.

]]> ~EvilAuthor http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/27368344/ http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/27368344/ Wed, 23 Sep 2009 02:24:20 PDT
For no logical reason whatsoever, it's more expensive to fly west to east then it is to fly east to west, which means I wouldn't be able to make two trips. It'd be way too expensive.

Right now, I guess the plan is to make a trip sometime early next year...or convince the few of you who were expecting to see me...possibly with donuts...to come visit me. And if you came to Sakuracon, we could run amok in Seattle and see all the awesome site seeing there is!

]]> ~EvilAuthor http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/27226885/ http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/27226885/ Tue, 15 Sep 2009 12:45:07 PDT
Since I couldn't name my car, I named my first cell phone. I named him Pepito and he was my Pepito. My dad changed our carrier and I got a new Pepito. After two years, I got an upgrade which was Pepito III and my current phone.

Until now.

In two days, I get my newest Pepito. Pepito IV! He's gonna be purple with touch screen and all these awesome features [most of which I will not be using...but whatever] and I will LOVE him as my own.

Why am I so happy about a phone you may ask? Because it's AMY'S PHONE. In my stories, Amy has a purple flip phone that he uses for all his spy stuff. When dad told me I could get an upgrade, I sent him a link for the phone I gave Amy along with two other phones that would have been free. Dad went ahead and bought me Amy's phone.

You might not think it's too cool, but in two days, I will have Pepito IV and I will be thrilled about it for weeks. HURRAY!




UPDATE: Ok, so I posted this entry on September 15th. Today is October 1st, so here's an update. First off, my phone never came. Apparently my dad doesn't know where I live so he told Verizon the wrong address and FedEx refused to let me change it. Because of this, I'm no longer getting the phone I was supposed to be getting. Instead I'm getting a black one. Yes, it's the same except for color, but I was really excited about getting a purple phone..and now I'm not. So emo moment.
I'm going to see about trading it at the local hub, but I'm not hopeful...I should have it in a few days and I'll be attempting to trade it before I open the box in an effort to increase my chances of getting a trade.

Even if I can't trade it, it's still the phone I based Amy's phone on so that's still pretty cool...I just won't be as excited about it as I was.
Also, my mood still reads as eager, which I was at the time of the original entry, but now I'm disappointed and it won't let me change my mood.

]]> ~EvilAuthor http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/27131714/ http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/27131714/ Thu, 10 Sep 2009 12:28:45 PDT
Naturally, since the stories where originally written to cheer up a depressed friend, the old stories have a LOT of fan service aim directly at my friend Laura so there are jokes in the original that won't work in a publicly shared work, so I need to rework everything before I can post it anywhere.

Here's some art I've done of them in the past
[link]
[link]

The second link has a sum up of the story. If you're too lazy to actually look, the story is basically two Mary Sue type characters who are so drastically exaggerated, they have magic powers...like glomping and squeaking, only magic. They also have a magic tome.

It's fun stuff.

Bats recently showed me how to post fics on dA, so I'll be posting them here.

]]> ~EvilAuthor http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/26871652/ http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/26871652/ Fri, 28 Aug 2009 08:02:36 PDT
The first idea will be a few of the Native legends I learned about while in Alaska. Mostly the legends about Raven. I will be doing the story of his birth and the story of his marriage to Fog Woman.
I might do the story about the guy who married a bear too..but I forgot the lesson you're supposed to learn from that one...Well, I remember the lesson, but not the wording they used, which is important. I'll need to look that up if I do that story.

The other comic will be shamelessly about my WoW characters. I got bored at work one day about a year ago and gave all my characters back stories that I'd like to finally share with people.
You perverts will enjoy that two of my characters are in a lesbian relationship with each other. My human warrior, Illvana, and my Dreanei mage, Ysane. It's cute.
And my character designs don't always match how my people look in game...FYI in case you're confused by them. Look at my pictures of Saintly if you don't know what I mean.

I also plan on doing more art of my spy characters Amy, Lavender, Mud, Reule, and Olsen. I might even draw Dun. GASP! Amy and Olsen will even be appearing as part of the Women's 30 [guys in women's clothes] on y!Gallery. I don't have any set plans except for Olsen NEEDS to be the Sailor so feel to offer suggestions.




I get my art books back from Bats next week at con so I'll be starting on all this pretty soon, but I don't know when I'll next get a chance to have stuff scanned so I can't tell you when to look for anything...Just wanted to let y'all know.

Also: I magically got 10,000 view on my friend's dA page and he's offered to do some pictures of King Epic, Princess Snooky, and SK so I'm thinking about making some profile pages for my characters from that comic.

]]> ~EvilAuthor http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/26740430/ http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/26740430/ Fri, 21 Aug 2009 18:31:42 PDT [link]

This is only interesting if you play WoW...or like puppies...Or draw creepy animal creatures that are actually quite cute.



But yea, so two new races are being added and if you can't tell, I'm excited about one of them. The landscape is being changed, which means my Troll is going to have re-explore everything...Not sure how I feel about that, but I do like exploring so whatever.

I WILL be getting this and my focus will be on raising my puppy and I'm going to be getting more involved in my guild The OMG Trolls. I've been watching The Guild and it gave me ideas.


[I didn't want the drama to stay on my front page. Thanks everyone who helped. Everything is all taken care of now.]

]]> ~EvilAuthor http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/26721857/ http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/26721857/ Thu, 20 Aug 2009 20:12:16 PDT
See, I got an IM from one of Moe's friends...a few of you know Moe...anyway, she CLAIMS she googled me and found me on cosplay.com and got my AIM from there...except my screen name hasn't been posted there since my stalker problem back in 2006 and I haven't been putting it up anywhere since for similar reasons.

This to me says she didn't actually get it from cosplay.com which means she got from somewhere else and tracked me down. This is VERY distressing to me.


EDITED FOR UPDATE:
Ok, so apparently I'm victim of Moe's break up. Moe's ex is either a crazy person or a bitch. Either way I got dragged into an effort to hurt Moe's rep, or sully his name, or possibly drive him towards suicide. Not sure.
It seems that the girl who contacted me played nice and tried to friend Moe on myspace. He rejected the request, but emailed her a link to his personal site. Hidden away in one of his files on the site, he kept a back up of his contact list that even he had forgotten was on there. I'm assuming it also included how he got the screen names he had because he got mine from cosplay.com back in 2007, which is where the girl claimed to have gotten mine.
She was trying to fish for stuff to use against Moe. However, all she got was my wrath. I wish to beat her bloody now. Maybe Moe's ex too.

See, during the days of Itachi Reznor's phone sex recording, over AIM, he confessed the whole story to me about the call and the risk of getting arrested. The details of which are worthy of their own journal entry, but a week later when he denied it and called me a liar for even saying such things, I posted the whole conversation in the forum where they organized the attack on him.
I don't mind white lies here and there, but phone sex with a 14 year old is kind of a big deal so changing his story three times resulted in a guilty vote from me.
The conversation I posted in the form was then copied onto 4chan and cosfu.com.
4chan and cosfu are kind of famous for trolling people.

My screenname floated around on actual trolling sites for two years and it took Moe's break up to get someone to mess with me.

I've changed my screen name and I will not be posting it anywhere. If you want it, contact me directly and ask for it. Don't give it to anyone else or I'll just change my name again and fail to inform you.

]]> ~EvilAuthor http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/26699951/ http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/26699951/ Wed, 19 Aug 2009 19:29:28 PDT Which got me thinking. What will you tell your children about Santa?

I for one plan on telling an altered version of the truth. Santa Claus is a mispronunciation of St. Nickolas. One year when Christmas was outlawed, St. Nick decided he'd give gifts in secret. As the children of the area would leave their wooden shoes by the door at night, he put toys and candies in the children's shoes [which is why we have stockings]. Some time later, there were three daughters who didn't have dowries and therefore couldn't be married. St. Nick gifted each of them with a modest dowry as their Christmas gifts. After this, it became a yearly tradition for people to exchange gifts and all unexplained gifts were assumed to be from St. Nick [aka Santa]

Years after he died, others began to take on the mantle of Santa and give gifts anonymously to children.

Today, they have Santa schools where people are trained to uphold the tradition.

The part I'll embellish on is this: The Santa at the mall is the district Santa. When you write a letter to Santa, it goes to a international processing center at the North Pole and is then sent to your local Santa.

]]> ~EvilAuthor http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/26372442/ http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/26372442/ Tue, 04 Aug 2009 03:00:06 PDT
I politely thanked them and went on with my quest. I'm a very busy girl. I have things to kill and there are just certain days where I just MUST kill those things.
The person [was was a level 1 warrior by the way. I imagine they left the appearance default as well] had other plans and went on to say that I personally sucked balls because I was an ally character. I figured I'd shut them by saying that my main is a troll. They were indeed appeased by this and asked me a few questions, which I answered because I'm so nice, but when they asked what server, I decided to be a bitch and said it was none of their business because I suck balls.

That amused me and I was pleased enough that I decided I'd sign off as soon as I finished my current quest.

The person was quite offended by my sarcastic, bitchy response. As they had started everything by saying I sucked balls, I wasn't sure what they exactly expected of me, but they acted like I was the one being rude. The person went on to insult me with misspelled words. I commented back a few times and VERY politely avoided informing them of all the spelling mistakes they were making. It was 2am. Who spells things at 2am?
Finally, I said they should go to bed because children need at least eight hours for healthy growth. They said they were older then me. As I had yet to mention my age or any indicator of how old I might be, and they were behaving like a ten year old, I highly doubted it and told them so. They said they were fifty-six.

I repeat. Fifty-six. Now, I fully admit there is no way this person was actually fifty-six. They STARTED the conversation by saying I sucked balls and had misspelled nearly every other word of our conversation and used far too much chat speak, but still the age they gave was fifty-six.
If on the slim chance that information was true, I pity that person. To be fifty-six and behave in such a way, I imagine that they dropped out of school. Sixteen is the legal age to drop out of school now, but forty years ago, it may have been younger.

I'm sure that they work some horrid job in the most degrading field. Something where education and criminal history are not required questions for answering.


Feeling very sad for the person, I apologized they never got to finish school. They gave a final misspelled insult. I turned in my quest, and almost went to bed, but then as I walked to my room, I thought I should update Twitter and say that I had a battle of wits with an opponent who was not only unarmed, but had never heard of wits....and somehow I updated dA instead.
So as you go about your day today. Remember this. You can be anyone you want to be on the internet, but telling yourself that you're smart doesn't mean you are.

]]> ~EvilAuthor http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/26282697/ http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/26282697/ Thu, 30 Jul 2009 18:19:31 PDT
While we were at Becka's house, we all discussed how Sailor Moon was one of our first animes [THE first in my case] and we came up with a huge cosplay plan for a group cosplay. I believe that by the time we were done, we had an idea for who could cosplay every main scout except for Mercury.

So I've had Sailor V on my list for a while. A very long while actually, but I wanted to use my real hair, but apparently my hair refuses to go very far so I'm finally willing to admit I need a wig, so I wanted to get on it.

The question becomes, should I be Venus or go through with my plans to be Sailor V first? I already have V's skirt [it 'too long', but I don't plan on showing my ass to strangers so the length stays], but I'd have to make her shirt from scratch. With Venus, I could get help from the other girls who will be in the group since the uniforms should match.

Sooo...V or Venus?




Also, after the sleepover, we went fabric shopping. Becka went back home after the fabric shopping, but Chibiroth took me to this Asian Market that's about the size of the one in Cary, only with a wider selection. They had bento boxes, which I really want for no apparent reason. I'll be holding off until after con, but if I don't buy a bento box at Kumoricon, I'm going back to get a box.




EDIT: As of August 12, 2009, I have decided I will make Sailor V first then make Venus or possible Princess Venus later on down the line.
See, Sailor V's crescent compact is an item that was made by Bandai back in the very early 90's. I've been watching one for a few months now, but the vender wanted $100 for it. When it wasn't selling, he added free shipping, but $100 is still a lot for just one prop. I might be willing to spend that on the Crystal Sword, but not the crescent compact...Anyway, today I found someone who was selling the compact for $4 plus shipping. I bid, and originally thought I'd been outbid, but the winner retracted and I won the item. Hurray for me! So I got a $100 item for about $10. That combined with the fact my Tohru Honda skirt is just about perfect for Sailor V's skirt...you know, aside from the fact it's "too long", I figure that's two points for Sailor V.
Besides, V, Venus, and Princess Venus all wear the same shoes, so really working on Sailor V first will help with all Minako related cosplays.

]]> ~EvilAuthor http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/26177640/ http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/26177640/ Sat, 25 Jul 2009 19:47:40 PDT
Anyway, I love Eric Vale. I've been a fan of his for a while and think he's a wickedly talented voice actor. I loved him as Trunks in DBZ and he's leaps and bounds better as Sanji then the guy 4Kids had [though that doesn't say as much as it should since it'd take a lot of effort to do worse...], but if you ever heard him as Yuki...so yea, I think he's awesome.

Well, apparently, he is/was at comic con and Veta got to meet him. Now, under normal conditions, I'd be bummed that she got to meet him and I didn't, but Veta is awesome and had me on speaker phone so I could hear him talking. She took me off speaker and handed him the phone and I got to have a fairly decent chat with the guy.

For the record, he's extremely nice and sounds absolutely nothing like what I'd thought he would sound like. It was just a wonderful phone call and I'm all giddy about it...He's awesome.

After a few minutes of actual honest to god conversation, he handed the phone back to Veta and told her that he thought I was a sweetheart.



My sister doesn't think voice actors really count as famous since they're only famous to a very small group, but Eric Vale is in my top five favorite voice actors. Top four even, but that's a weird number...so yeah, top five and he was just awesome to me on the phone and then complimented me to my friend. FLAIL!
He's famous to me, so this makes me happy.

The only thing bigger then this is meeting Chris Patton or when Hank Azaria told a guard I was family so I could get a hug [and Hank is famous even by my sister's standards]

]]> ~EvilAuthor http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/26056645/ http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/26056645/ Mon, 20 Jul 2009 01:12:26 PDT
It might have something to do with the fact I got free pizza when I went to Pizza Hut last night. I placed an order and when I went over to pick it up, they'd locked down like two hours early. Called Veta [my best friend from high school] to look up their number [she's not even in the same state as me anymore, but behold the power of the internet!], but my phone died after I told her my area code...so I probably wouldn't have been able to call them and ask about my pizza anyway.
I walked to the pick up window and because their computer was down, they just GAVE me my order. I didn't have to pay for it. It was just mine. For free. Free pizza. Plus a free Pepsi and Veta can tell you how much I love Pepsi.


Of course, the excitement over free food could be effecting why I'm so happy to be on a list of names for a commission...Hmm. I will need to ponder this further as I drink my free Pepsi.



The picture I commissioned is of Kento [aka Shuu for those of you who only watch anime in Japanese...which is weird because he's Chinese and they gave him a Japanese name in the dub...huh] from Ronin Warriors/Yoroiden Samurai Troopers. Kento is my favorite character from the show and he doesn't get enough love. He's been cruelly labeled "the fat guy" by most of fans because he's drawn a little thicker then everyone else. It's not his fault his friends are twigs. Just because he has a healthy love of food is no reason to label him. He's mostly muscle so he NEEDS those fifty hamburgers.

...Um yea. So I got put on the list. Very happy. Squee and stuff. I am so easily entertained.

...Anyway, that's how I am. What's up with you?

]]> ~EvilAuthor http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/25687344/ http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/25687344/ Thu, 02 Jul 2009 03:23:50 PDT
Anyway, I've decided to cosplay as Tohru Honda from Fruits Basket. She's kind of a mild and meek character, which is how I tend to be when I don't know people, so I figured I could pull off her personality pretty decently.

Now, I KNOW that Tohru isn't the girl who had a Kyo back pack, but I don't like that my purse sticks out so badly in costume. I want to be able to store my phone, camera, autograph book, what have you in something I don't need to put down for pictures.

So I'm making a Kyo bag. I HAVE one already of course. Bought it at my first AUSA, but mom couldn't find it, so she couldn't bring it to me when she came to visit, so I'm making this one.

Since I don't want it to look like Kagura's bag, my Kyo bag will have a blue ribbon, which I've made already. I'm already started, so hopefully this all works well and I'll have pictures to post on here.

]]> ~EvilAuthor http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/25612931/ http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/25612931/ Sun, 28 Jun 2009 17:57:25 PDT It was really big, and I doubted anyone would actually read it, so I did a super short version that just went "BAM BAM BAM!" on the day to day details...and it was STILL huge.

Apparently I did a LOT. It makes sense. I only missed TV once and that was towards the end of the trip.



Anyway, rather then reposting it here, I'll try to write an even shorter version then what I did for my short version.

The cruise was "Seven days long" and unlike most cruises, it was literally seven full days. We left Seattle early Saturday morning and returned to Seattle the next Saturday morning.

Over the seven days, we went to Juneau, Sitka, and Ketchikan in Alaska and Victoria in Canada. We also saw Hubbard Glacier in between.

On ship, I took part in cooking classes, dance classes, spa days, Wii challenges, tours of the ship, and karaoke. The ship also provided a ton of entertainment in the form of three magic shows, two comedy shows, and several musical performances. If you've never been on a cruise, they also have a ton of "free food" in several locations on the ship. It's not really free of course since you had to pay to get on the ship in the first place, but you can go back for more as many times as you want.
I ate the free buffet on the Lido Deck [the eighth floor] and a few dinner meals in the "La Fontaine" restaurant which was on the forth and fifth floors...And the ship had a pay restaurant called the Pinicle Grill. I never ate there, but I ate samples of their food at the end of every cooking class I went to. I tried a ton of food I wouldn't have eaten normally.
Apparently I don't like sushi.

Off ship, things got crazier. I went dog sledding in Juneau. For $400 more then I paid, I could have been flown out to a glacier and gotten the ride in the snow instead of the mud, but after the tour, they let us pet puppies. The people who took the more expensive ride tried to make their trip better then mine, but their puppies were eight months old. My trip had puppies that were seven months old and another set that were NINE DAYS OLD! They were the cutest things ever. I think I had the better tour.
Alaska has four native tribes. The Raven, the Eagle, the Bear, and of course, the Wolf. In the three Alaskan cities I went to, I learned a ton about the natives, their origin stories, and their totem poles. They are an amazing people that are still active today. Some of the legends were epic.
I also did a ton of shopping. Got new pajamas, some native art, some Alaskan chocolate, and an Alaskan name plate for my bike.

Canada was a tad disappointing. I'm sure you remember how excited I was about buying cheese there? Well, the tour mom and I took was so bumpy and awful, I ended up getting car sick after a week of avoiding being sea sick. When we finished the tour, I still had two hours to go find cheese, but I just wanted to get back on the boat and pretend it didn't happen. I did get my passport stamped, so I guess that was cool.
I learned some cool stuff on my tour, but it's all soap opera stuff so I won't go into that unless someone asks.


Anyway, yea. That was my trip. I'll have pictures soonish. Mom took a ton and promised to send me copies. All I have right now is the pictures I took with my phone in Sitka and Ketchikan.

]]> ~EvilAuthor http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/25183461/ http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/25183461/ Sun, 07 Jun 2009 16:50:12 PDT

So the marathon is going and out of eight brides, only one was skinny. We're not talking seven slightly chubby brides. We're talking women who are HUGE. Their dresses could act as a tent for someone my size.

And five of the fat brides were from the south. Four of those southern brides were from North or South Carolina. Two brides did VERY red neck behaviors....No seriously. One of the grooms actually sneaked out at 5am on his wedding day to go turkey hunting.

I'm not sure what I'm supposed to gather from this. Fat southern women are more likely to be crazy brides? Or fat southern crazy brides are more likely to go on TV?

]]> ~EvilAuthor http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/25052943/ http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/25052943/ Sun, 31 May 2009 14:19:54 PDT
My mom and I are going to Alaska next month [end of June, I'll be gone for over a week] and we're making a small stop in Canada, during which time I wish to buy this illegal cheese.

Why's the cheese illegal you ask? Because America is stupid. Yes, you heard me. The "Greatest Country in the World" is stupid. See, when Canada is making cheese, they heat the milk at a moderate temperature for a decent amount of time. They kill all the bad stuff, but save most of the good stuff.
What does America do? High heat for the shortest amount of time. It kills the bad, but it kills all the good stuff...and quite a bit of flavor [so I'm told anyway...I've never had any non American cheese to compare it too].

Canada's cheese is perfectly healthy, but because it wasn't made with America's stands, it can't be sold in the USA. Therefore, it's illegal.

When I stop in Canada with my mom, I'm buying that illegal cheese. Since it's a processed food, I'm going to see if they'll let me keep it. If not, I'll just eat it there. If they do, I'll take it home and make a grilled cheese sandwich with it.


It's good to have goals.

]]> ~EvilAuthor http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/24816927/ http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/24816927/ Mon, 18 May 2009 05:42:45 PDT
A few days ago, I saw a beetle crawling happily across my living room floor. I feared the worst so I used paper to grab it, dropped the paper into the sink, burned the paper, burned the bug when it tried to get away and then washed the burnt bug and paper to a watery grave.

Last night/this morning I saw another of the same beetle crawl across my living room floor [same area...suspicious] so I grabbed it with paper, dropped it into the sink...you get the idea. However, this time I made sure to confirm it was not in fact a roach like I feared. I don't know what it is, but it's not a roach or a type of roach. It's a just a beetle at this point. However, after I settled back down to finish watching Bones, another of the same beetle walked across my floor...in the same area. I had to get up a few more times and racked up a total of four beetles in one night/morning with a total of five beetles over the last three days.

Now, it's spring, bugs are reappearing after a long winter sleep, blah blah blah, but there's two ideas on how the bugs got in. Idea 1: They entered the front door during one of the multiple package deliveries Anthony has gotten. He gets a LOT of packages and I don't always shut the door completely until after I've moved all the packages to his room.
Idea 2: The came in through the glass door when we were working with spray paint. Much to my annoyance, the glass door was left open for quite a while when stuff was being sprayed. Small beetles wouldn't have been very obvious to someone sitting out in the grass with a spray paint can and since I didn't like the cold from the open door, I bunkered down in my room.

I'm leaning towards Idea 2. Anyway, since I don't like bugs in general and I really don't like bugs distracting me from my day to day, I'm going to be either killing them all or scaring them away with bug...scare...stuff...Yeah. Bug Scare Stuff. I don't want to do a food based trap because I've always felt that attracts then kills and I don't know where the bugs are coming from so I'm not a fan of the spray idea. Plus I spend most of my time in this apartment either sleeping or sitting on the floors and I don't want to spray the carpets if I'm going to be sitting there.

I've heard of things people can get that scare bugs away and prevent new bugs from coming in. Does anyone use these or have a recommendation?




Journal title is a vague Repo reference
And yes, burning the bugs in the sink is fun, but I don't want to do that every time. When I'm watching tv, I don't want to get up just to kill a bug.

]]> ~EvilAuthor http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/24628179/ http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/24628179/ Thu, 07 May 2009 00:13:25 PDT
I was talking with a few people and it seems we all agree that wearing Deadpool's shirt to see the movie would be awesome and there would be much rejoicing and blah blah blah, but here's the rub. I don't want a shirt with Deadpool on it. I want HIS shirt. You know, as in the shirt he wears on his days off and he's not in costume.

No, not the sleeveless shirt from the Wolverine movie. I wouldn't want that unless it was the shirt the actor actually wore on his body...and possibly signed. No. I want the shirt from the comics.

This one: [link]

Sadly, this shirt doesn't seem to exist. If it does and I'm mistaken, would anyone care to be a dear and let me know?

I could make it of course. Illegally go behind Marvel's back and order the shirt from one of those tshirt making places. I would have already since there's a few places that don't even check copy rights before making the shirt, but they'd want me to order a bunch of shirts at once and frankly spending $100 on 12 shirts doesn't appeal to me that much.

So yea...Anyone know where I can find his shirt?
His jacket, gloves, or boxers work too.




...Boxers make good pajama bottoms during the summer dammit. Don't judge me.

]]> ~EvilAuthor http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/24213023/ http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/24213023/ Mon, 13 Apr 2009 02:28:40 PDT

~~~


Ah, Easter weekend, and therefore, Sakuracon. Whoo!

Anyway, like I tend to do for cons, I packed way in advance...Like WAY ahead of time, but I also tend to freak out right before con so I also unpacked my bags, repacked them, and put everything near the door Wednesday night so I wouldn't forget anything.

Quite late, Anthony brought me his pants and had my hem them for him. It wasn't a perfect job, but it was the night before con and for free...But it worked so whatever. If he wants them perfect then I'll redo it later when there isn't a convention the next day.
I stayed up VERY late and finished the pants to the best of my ability...and had Anthony make sure to wake me up before he left for the train so I'd have time to pull my head together before I started my two hour trip to go meet Cassie and the unknown assortment of people that would also be in her van [which later turned out to be all people I knew].

I got to the MAX stop where I was going to be meeting Cassie half an hour early, but due to some chaos, it was nearly an hour before I got picked up. It turned out that the stop was really close to where everyone was, but Cassie didn't know that before hand and I have never been to that area before so while I could have walked there much quicker in theory, I'd have gotten lost instantly so the wait was actually for the best since I didn't need to get rescued on top of everything else.
The original plan was to leave around noon, but it was somewhere between 3 and 4 before we actually made it out on the road.

There was some confusion over the number 36, but after a good while, we made it con! And there was much rejoicing. I scampered off and got my badges [I had thought I was getting 3, but I only got 2 so I was sad]...That was Thursday so I don't really remember what I did after I got my badge, so I'll just assume I followed the Anime Hunters around like a lost puppy. If I'm wrong, remind me what actually happened and I'll make corrections.

Bright and early Friday morning I realized that I'd over slept and in rushed through my morning stuff to get to the Recording Studio where I would be working as Bitch Boy/Girl [the person who runs all over the place getting stuff...also known as "Gopher" or "Go-for"]. Anthony's Snowtrooper helmet had been forgotten in Cassie's car so I had to jump through a few hoops and play phone tag to get it, get it to him, get the keys where they needed to be, and get back to the Studio to resume work as Bitch Girl. Some of my internet friends popped up to see me and we talked for a while until we were politely removed from the room so skit audio could be recorded.
I spent the rest of my time working in the Sound Studio as a door guarding person making sure it was closed during recordings and random con noise didn't ruin stuff.

The Anime Hunters had a panel, which I enjoyed, and after I cut out a few minutes early, I had a panel. I was told I was supposed to check with someone half an hour early so they'd know I was still there and doing the panel, but all I was told was to find a staff member in a red coat. When I went over there, I was the only staff member in a red coat [the only person in a red coat period], so I spoke to myself, had a pleasent chat with a few more internet friends, and hosted the Pirate vs Ninja panel. It was EPIC. I was actually ready for the panel this time and they seemed to think I was funny [YAY!] so it all went smooooooothly. Ninja's won...A lot. I mean damn. It was just great watching it and I can't wait to see the video people took of the panel.

I worked some more Friday was actually kind of hellish. Mr. Zach needed some printouts from down stairs and he sent me to go get them. I ran down from the 6th floor to the 2nd floor to get them and then back up to the 6th floor...It wasn't everything so I went back down only to learn the printer was now speaking in tongues and the stuff printing looked like it was in code. I ran back up to the 6th floor only to learn that the gibberish was ours and we needed copies of the only release form that came out in English.
2nd floor couldn't help so they sent me down to Kinkos, then back to the 2nd floor, then back to the 6th floor. By the time I was done, my feet were killing me and that feelings never went away the whole weekend.

When I was done for the day, Bats, Cantik, and I snagged Rude and got him to do a Spy vs Spy photoshoot with us. Once Cantik posts the pictures, I'll see about getting the photos edited so Rude is wearing a brown suit instead of black so I can claim he's the British spy.
Quite late at night, I helped Mr. Zach and Kiwi make Mr. Zach's Master Chief costume...and I burned myself a few t... ]]> ~EvilAuthor http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/24028403/ http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/24028403/ Thu, 02 Apr 2009 17:49:10 PDT
Sadly, I won't be doing much in the ways of new costumes. I kind of broke my sewing machine just as I was getting used to it. I was making a tiny red coat for the beanie baby I'm using as a prop for my Reule cosplay and the fabric frayed more then I realized and some threads got into the machine. One thing led to another and next thing I do, the machine is smelling funny and thread is coming from below, but not linking with the thread from above...so basically I'd sew a line and the thread would fall back off.

I was going to make a cloak, but yea...No cloak.

For the con, I'm riding up north with Chibiroth in a van. It'll take me roughly 2-3 hours to get from here to where she is, but considering how much cheaper it is ride with her then to take the train, I think it's worth it. Plus even if I leave at 9 to go meet her, I'll still be able to either sleep 2 hours later then I would with the train, or have 2 hours to wake up and make sure I don't leave anything. And she's dropping me off at my house after con is over.
We're listening to musical soundtracks in the car. Whoo!

Since I wasn't able to make anything new, I'll be cosplaying as Reule, my original Red spy from Spy vs Spy: Roomie Mistake and I'm bringing most of my pirate gear. Reule will be fun and I got a track number on my wig so I might actually get to be a red head after all...WHOO!...If the wig isn't here by Tuesday, I will be panicking though.
I have enough pirate gear in my bag that I could do several combinations. My mom has my black skirt though, so not as many as I'd like, but enough for con.

Welp...I'm done. I'll have a report after con.

]]> ~EvilAuthor http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/23990355/ http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/23990355/ Tue, 31 Mar 2009 17:20:40 PDT
He was a singer who had a short run as an actor on a TV show. I thought he was wonderful.

I really wanted to meet him. He was one of those people who loved his fans and he kept attending conventions to meet them even when he started getting sick.

I'm sad now.

]]> ~EvilAuthor http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/23969701/ http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/23969701/ Mon, 30 Mar 2009 14:30:14 PDT
Geeks die virgins.

Ok, 1: There is such a thing as a female geek
2: Female geeks are more likely to like other geeks
3: A female geek WOULD be impressed by your level 80 Warlock on World of Warcraft. In fact, a female geek would be interested in playing with their boyfriend
4: Geeks are perverts. If geeks are perverts. Female + Geek = Female geek pervert.
5: Some of the richest men in the world were geeks in their younger days.

I am a geek. Most of my friends are geeks. My boyfriend is a geek.

Let me repeat that.

My BOYFRIEND is a GEEK.

Gosh, according to the stereotype, geeks can't get girls...HMMM. That's a head scratcher.

Most of my male friends who are geeks have girlfriends too. In fact, a few of them have girlfriends who are prettier [naturally] then what most jocks could ever hope to get.



So yeah. Geeks are not doomed to die a lonely virgin life. Some of them will do better then you ever will. And they will laugh at you, take a picture of your sorry state, put it on the internet with a funny caption, and millions of other geeks will also laugh at you.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going back to the motivational posters. They don't really motivate, but they're funny.

]]> ~EvilAuthor http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/23384074/ http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/23384074/ Tue, 24 Feb 2009 15:34:10 PST
I don't have Tmobile. I have Verison. I've had Verison for quite a while now too. I like my phone. I like my Verison service. There is no way in hell I'm going to pay them for a service I don't have and don't want.

I called in and reported this to them. You can't suspend service I don't have, after all. They filed a report for me and I thought it was done with.

I've noticed a LOT of missed calls on my cellphone recently. All the same number. I looked up the area code and it was a nation wide toll free service area code only used by companies. Today, I answered when they called and it was Tmobile again. I reported the issue again.

I. Am. Not. Going. To. Pay. THEM! I'm not. Not only do I not have service with them, after this, I don't WANT service with them. Ever.

]]> ~EvilAuthor http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/23295612/ http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/23295612/ Thu, 19 Feb 2009 19:24:13 PST
Oh...right. Dinner. Damn, so close.

Yea, that's right. I got a FREE sandwich from Subway. Impressed? I sure was!

My mom sent me a $50 gift card for Subway. She said she wants me to eat healthy and apparently my current meal picks aren't good enough for her. So when Anthony asked me to pick up some stuff from WalMart, I said to myself "There's a Subway in WalMart...And I have a card. WHOO!"

So I wandered over to WalMart and got when I was asked to get and then slid into line at Subway. I got my sandwich. 1' long, chicken, pickles, cheese [the good stuff] and when I handed them my card, he scanned it, handed it back to me and said their card machine was down.

I panicked at first because I only had $2.75 in cash on me, if cards were out of the question, I had no method of paying, but before I could even finish the thought, he handed me my sandwich and said "Don't worry about it this time."

"Really? Thank you!" And I skipped home with my free meal. WHOO!...In hind site, I should have gotten a cookie too, but whatever.




EDIT:

On Sunday, March 1st, the local Subway gave me a free drink because I'm a regular who doesn't order crazy food. I've been going in on a regular basis every couple of days and ordering.
The people know me and like me...apparently.
I never order drinks since I have Pepsi at come, but I still enjoyed the free drink!

]]> ~EvilAuthor http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/23201441/ http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/23201441/ Sat, 14 Feb 2009 17:39:44 PST
For not many people know this, but Pepe Le Pew is my favorite Loony Toons character. I love his romance with Penelope Pussycat. Ah! What love!
Many people think it's one sided, but it's really not. Penelope has shown in several episodes that if Pepe didn't smell, she'd be all over him...Unfortunately, Pepe is scared of aggressive women so that normally amounts to him running away and HER chasing.

Aren't the little buggers tragic?

So today is Valentine's day and I hope everyone has a good one. Eat chocolates if you like chocolates. If not, there's cookies, cake, and my personal favorite treat: Steak!

Yep. Traditional Valentine's day meat. WHOO!

]]> ~EvilAuthor http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/23133402/ http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/23133402/ Wed, 11 Feb 2009 05:17:52 PST
I want Xmen. Action figures, DVDs, comics, pictures that have been signed by voice actors. I don't care. Heck, since this is DA, original art works too.

I admit, I've been on a kick lately. I've been watching Wolverine and the Xmen lately and it woke up a TON of old interests for me. See, I'm a major Xmen geek. My dad used to collect comic books and after most of his collection got ruined when my Grandma's basement flooded, he gave me the comics that survived and I started my own collection. I'm REALLY picky about my characters too...by the way Jonny, KITTY AND PETER! As in Piotr aka Colossus, not Peter Parker. Dated, dumped, moved on. ::shakes fist::
Nothing in the Ultimate series is cannon anyway. That whole thing is one big fanfic.

Um...yeah...So as I was saying, the new cartoon pays tribute to a lot of the more classic comics, Nightcrawler even goes all piraty in one episode and makes references back to a mini arc that he had back in the 80's...the prize of my collection. [In the mini arc, he got pulled into an alternate dimension, joined a pirate crew, saved a princess, and all kinds of wacky adventures before making it back home. NOT a dream.]

I stopped paying attention to the storyline a few years ago when they tried saying Kurt was a real demon and Angel was a real angel with magical healing blood [emo kid heals people by bleeding on them], but the cartoon made me feel all crazy nostalgic so I'm getting back into it.

So yea. Christmas list this year is Xmen junk...Just letting y'all know ten months in advance because I know me. When it gets close to Christmas shopping season, I'll be a deer in the headlights when someone asks me like I normally am.

]]> ~EvilAuthor http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/23005673/ http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/23005673/ Wed, 04 Feb 2009 15:52:33 PST
Because the aliens had destroyed out telephone lines, we had to use a different means of communication. Someone had figured out another way to make phones work using a system of tubes the aliens had put up, but the only draw back was that if the tubes were being used for their intended purposes, the call would be interrupted.

I was using one of these tube systems and a friend had just told me he was in trouble when the call cut off and goo started coming out of the tube. I went to my dad's house to get supplies and was going to start a quest to save my friend...I don't remember everything I took, but I took a tray of brownies and some cinnamon rolls. I apparently didn't want to eat healthy on my rescue mission.

The aliens didn't have hands. They had two sharp claws, which made opening door handles difficult for them so they weren't moving into houses that had nobs. They were just going to places that have a handle you push down and pull and making themselves new residents. Before I left, I helped my dad make it look like he had claw marks on his door so aliens wouldn't try to move into his house since they'd hopefully think someone already had.

Sadly, I woke up before I could actually start on my quest, but I'm not sure if it was a dull nightmare or an awesome scifi flick. On one hand, it had aliens with super sharp claws that were treating humans as pets and attacking anything that stepped out of line. On the other, the only bad guys were fumbling idiots who weren't really gunning towards killing anyone.

]]> ~EvilAuthor http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/22897988/ http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/22897988/ Fri, 30 Jan 2009 04:37:35 PST
Well, I was watching Good Eats and after it went off, there was a show about two 'brothers' who teach people how to do full meals for whatever. I'd seen them before when they did their Thanksgiving special and liked it well enough. The show was for a Superbowl Party. I don't like football, but my boyfriend and a few of my friends do so I figured I'd watch anyway and see if I could pick up anything useful.

It was mostly boring, especially since the Good Eats episode I'd been watching was about Dip anyway and that's most of what these guys were talking about when all of a sudden the more effeminate of the two says the following "Normally when we have Superbowl parties, we'll have one friend at the TV being loud and then everyone else is hanging out in the kitchen, but that's not what I want. I don't want to throw two parties, so I like to set up some activities for guests who don't like football."

Keep in mind this is an episode for a SUPERBOWL PARTY! Apparently they only know one person who likes football, so why did everyone else come? If the host doesn't like loud football fans, why have a Superbowl party? It's POINTLESS.

Also, if all the guests are in the kitchen, that implies that you're still cooking and a good host should at least try to have all the food finished before the guests arrive. If you want to make sure the food is still hot when the guests finally eat it, then they make food trays where the food can stay hot.

Ugh. I don't even like football and I bet I could set up a better Superbowl party then that.

]]> ~EvilAuthor http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/22832443/ http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/22832443/ Mon, 26 Jan 2009 20:00:36 PST
Hurray! I already paid for my badge, but I don't think I'm getting a discount anyway so whatever. I'll get a special badge though so I'm happy, but I hope I get a normal badge too since I collect them.


~~~


On an unrelated note, on Y!gallery, one of the members made a crack pairing generator with the spies. The list wasn't full so new names are getting added all the time, but I got a few that'd be cute. Nothing I could make a full story out of, but I'll try to do a few one shots. Only a few paragraphs each. It helps that Xander's I got one of my own people for one of my crack pairings. I know how he is, so I can make him freak out.

]]> ~EvilAuthor http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/22773700/ http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/22773700/ Sat, 24 Jan 2009 03:06:05 PST
We have two computers and two desks. They have their own little place with the big TV in the room near the front of the apartment. My bedroom is the back and I sit on the laptop in the livingroom most of the time anyway, so I rarely go in the 'computer room'

The computer my dad bought for me has wireless keyboard and mouse. This is 'awesome' to my techie friends, but considering the computer only recognizes the mouse and not the keyboard, I'm much happier sitting withe laptop...besides, I don't even have a chair to use at the computer desk so why go in there?

Anyway, for reasons unexplained, we moved my roommate's dresser into the computer room. This involved moving some of the other furniture and disconnecting then reconnecting a bunch of wires. The big TV was placed on top of the dresser and my computer desk was moved to an angle so now both desks could very easily face the computer or turn 45 degrees to face the TV...Also, my monitor was high jacked so roomie can still use a duel monitor even though the TV has been disconnected from the computer. It was only because I don't use it, but still worthy of note...I WOULD use the thing...I want a keyboard a mouse that use wires. I'm not a techie. I don't have billions of wires, it'd be fine.

The whole rearranging was random and had no warning. I'm pretty sure the only reason I wasn't required to help move a bed down the hall was because there just isn't enough space in the computer room for it.

...On the bright side, since my monitor was high jacked, there's all kinds of space on my desk now. I might get a chair and put my sewing machine in there!

]]> ~EvilAuthor http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/22655081/ http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/22655081/ Sun, 18 Jan 2009 14:34:01 PST
1] Put your iTunes, Windows Media Player, etc. on shuffle.
2] For each question, press the next button to get your answer.
3] YOU MUST WRITE THAT SONG NAME DOWN NO MATTER HOW SILLY IT SOUNDS.
4] Tag three people.


IF SOMEONE SAYS "IS THIS OKAY?" YOU SAY?
You've Got to Hide Your Love Away - The Beatles

HOW WOULD YOU DESCRIBE YOURSELF?
I'm So Worried - Monty Python [...I do worry a lot]

WHAT DO YOU LIKE IN A GUY/GIRL?
I Want to Rock and Roll All Night - Kiss

HOW DO YOU FEEL TODAY?
Helter Skelter - The Beatles [...Huh?]

WHAT IS YOUR LIFE'S PURPOSE?
Mr. Mistoffolees - Cats Sound Track [HOLY SHIT! I didn't know I had this song. Happy place happy place!]

WHAT IS YOUR MOTTO?
On the Run - Pink Floyd

WHAT DO YOUR FRIENDS THINK OF YOU?
I Don't Want to Stop - Ozzy Osbourne

WHAT DO YOUR PARENTS THINK OF YOU?
With A little Help From My Friends - The Beatles [They are apparently popular today..which isn't unexpected considering how many songs I have by them]

WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT OFTEN?
No Brakes - The Offspring [Actually, yes. This song is stuck in my head often]

WHAT IS 2 + 2?
Popular - Wicked Sound Track

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR BEST FRIEND(S)?
Crazy Train - Ozzy Osbourne [my friends are crazy?]

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
Merry Christmas Baby - Otis Redding

WHAT IS YOUR LIFE STORY?
Jessica - Bloodrock [The story of my life...is a song about my sister?]

WHAT DO YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU GROW UP?
Camelot - Monty Python [I want to be a silly place]

WHAT DO YOU THINK WHEN YOU SEE THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
Alice's Restaurant - ...Internet?

WHAT WILL YOU DANCE TO AT YOUR WEDDING?
Don't Bother Me - The Beatles [...no. Just no]

WHAT WILL THEY PLAY AT YOUR FUNERAL?
Famous Person Quiz - Monty Python

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR FRIENDS?
Can't Buy Me Love - The Beatles

"WHAT WILL YOU POST THIS AS?
Boulevard of Broken Dreams - Green Day

~~~~~~

Rules: Put iTunes on shuffle, and write the title of the song and artist as the answer to every question- one song per question. Comments are in parentheses.

1) What is your life going to be like in five years?
Communication Breakdown - Led Zeplin

2) How is your love life going for you right now?
Everybody's Trying my Baby - The Beatles [...this song is a few months late. That was LAST year when all my friends were trying to date me. It was weirding me out]

3) What pisses you off the most about the opposite sex?
Dream Police - Cheap Trick

4) What do your parents really think of you?
Words of Love - The Beatles [Awwww! But seriously, I'm starting to think I should just skip Beatles songs]

5) What do you think about the world and its current state?
Charlie Brown - The Coasters [He's a clown, that Charlie Brown]

6) What is the worst thing that's ever happened to you?
Quarter To Three

7) What will your first/next time having sex be like?
I Like Traffic Lights - Monty Python [but only when they're green...I don't get it either]

8) What is your main goal in life?
Run Away - Spamalot Sound Track...Secretly Monty Python

9) What do the girls at your school think of your looks?
Albuquerque - Weird Al [Um...Ten Starving Crazed Weasels?]

10) What do you really want in life?
Forgotten - Linkin Park [Taken far from my safety]

11) How are you going to get far in life?
I Want a Hippopotamus for Christmas - Dr Demento's Christmas CD [So...does that mean I need to get one?]

12) What do say when you're in a bad mood?
House of the Rising Sun - The Animals

13) What about when you are really happy?
Emergency Ward - Cheech and Chong [...?]

14) What do think of yourself in general?
Have You Ever - The Offspring [Have you ever walked through the room, but felt like the room walked around you like there was a leash around your neck that pulled you through?]

15) What is your life's theme song?
Crawling - Linken Park

16) What are you going to do this weekend?
Buddy Holly - Weezer [Oh oh and your Mary Tyler Moore]

17) How can you try and make yourself happy?
Eleanor Rigby - The Beatles [but that song is SAD!]

18) What song will they play at your wedding?
Getting Better - The Beatles [sure...but Beatles are dominating this...they can't have THAT big of a percentage...can they?]

19) What about your funeral?
~EvilAuthor http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/22586908/ http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/22586908/ Wed, 14 Jan 2009 21:14:43 PST
My dad bought my plane tickets for the trip. It was nice because it meant I didn't have to spend that money, it sucked because I had no say in my flight times. Combined with a flight delay, I got into North Carolina at 1:30am January 10th...I left at noon the day before...Yay. [Sarcasm]

Shortly after I moved to Portland, my dad and his girlfriend moved as well. In a wonderful display of being a brat, my dad's girlfriend's youngest son drew on the walls of his closet...and hung up a centerfold from Playboy...also in his closet. In theory, the kids don't live there, but this little brat has claimed that space. I was creeped out, so I slept on the couch since I didn't want to touch anything in that room.

My dad got a dog, so that was neat. Her name is Sunshine and she's a greyhound mix.

Saturday was pretty much the only day I had in Cary, but due to sucky communication and being unable to reach the people I actually wanted to reach, I ended up watching movies on the sofa with dad all day. It was a great movie, but not how I planed to spend my time.

The runts weren't supposed to be under foot during our visit, but Teresa's youngest came over with a friend and stayed the night. I was content with ignoring them, but Jess was very uncomfortable and so pretty much everyone was displeased by the brat and his friend puttering about. Apparently Teresa just didn't understand why Jess and I were upset about the interruption of our visit with our dad and Jess said "I can't just have two days with my dad?" more times then was needed. I got the point though.

Sunday, Jess's friend Daniel came and took us to Winston to meet up with Mom and Grandma. Hugs all around and we went in for a shopping spree...sorta...Shopping was involved anyway. My friend Lala met up with us and acted as commentary on my behalf. Mom and Grandma both don't like 'tight clothes,' but since designers MAKE the clothes tight on purpose, Jess normally is the judge on if something is good for me or not, but since she and I have very different tastes, I needed Lala to be on my side when I liked something.

After the Sunday shopping was done, we went to Olive Garden and Lala and I split a meal rather then both getting more then we could eat...It was good. The combined leftovers of Mom and Jess fed three people Monday night so I'm pretty sure I was better off splitting my meal with Lala.

Monday, I went to the dentist. He poked and prodded at my teeth, the way they do at such appointments and said I had no cavities and should be happy. I've been spitting up blood because my wisdom teeth are coming in, which is awesome because I was afraid there was something wrong and my teeth were going to start falling out and my gums peal off...or something equally disgusting. But it's just wisdom teeth so it's all good. He gave me a coffee cup...which strikes me as counter productive.

There was even more shopping after the dentist. Jess insisted.

Between what Mom, Grandma, and Jess bought me on the two shopping days, and the stuff from home I wanted to take back with me, I ended up needing three bags. All three were very full. I had brought an empty bag along, but I still needed to borrow a bag from Mom. I came out with four pairs of pants, several shirts, some cooking stuff, and a bright red coat. That coat is freaking awesome. It's sooo bright. No way anyone will ever lose me in a crowd when I'm wearing that thing.

I realise that most of my clothes are purples or blues, but that doesn't stop this coat from being awesome. Shut up.

Tuesday, my actual birthday, we went to my favorite Japanese restaurant that's near my Mom's house. The service was awful and Grandma left way to big of a tip for our waiter, but I loved the food and we gossiped about the two teenaged waiters that are apparently always awful and have been hurting business since they got hired [it was my first time eating there since these girls got hired so it was all news to me].
After we ate, it was off to meet with dad. He picked us up in Greensboro. Jess is picky, so I asked if she minded us visiting my tiny friend Monica. Jess was all for it since it was my birthday and all, but dad pitched a fit so I got no visit. I kind of pouted when we went past the exit for Monica's house. I miss my tiny friend.

This morning, early at 6am, my dad dropped me off at the airport. I took the long flight home and returned to Oregon late afternoon. I unpacked and crawled into as hot of a shower as I could make. Now I sit in pajamas my sister got me and I write this blog.

I had a good birthday. I got to see three of my North Carolina friends [Jesse, Stephen, and Lala], spent lots of bond... ]]> ~EvilAuthor http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/22482043/ http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/22482043/ Fri, 09 Jan 2009 04:59:20 PST
The lady [I've heard her before and thought it was a teenage boy] apparently has an ex named Trevor and her current boyfriend/husband is just like him. She wants him to shut up or get out. He's heartless and not sleeping in bed with her tonight. He should shut up and let her sleep. repeat.

He apparently promises to stop drinking. He wants her to calm down and talk about this in the morning. Let's just sleep. Repeat.

I heard some weird noises and a change in dialog. I couldn't tell if it was the sound of him slamming a dresser shut or if he'd given up and hit her to shut her up [I could barely hear him, but I was still able to hear her after I changed rooms so I wouldn't have blamed him too much if he had]. Either way, I was about to call the police when the woman started up with new dialog. "It's your fault someone called the cops. I can't believe you'd do this to me."

I could hear every single word this woman was saying as if she was in my room saying it. I thought she was fighting with someone on the phone for the first hour of the fight. That guy is soooo not the reason someone called the cops. The cops might have even summoned themselves wondering what that weird noise was they heard from the station.

I have a flight in the morning. My neighbors aren't every well liked at the moment.

]]> ~EvilAuthor http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/22382899/ http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/22382899/ Sat, 03 Jan 2009 21:22:26 PST
~~~

Hurray. It's good to be home again. I was gone longer then I thought I'd be.

The day before New Year's Eve [the 30th], my boyfriend walked by and said "Oh, we're going to visit my family tomorrow. You might want to pack." I scampered off, packed my bag with enough clothes to last through Friday...we stilled till Saturday. I didn't pack enough. Sad.
We went to the beach. That might seem silly to you all since it's cold, but I've never seen the Pacific ocean before so it was awesome. I took pictures.
We had Christmas dinner and opened the presents that had been saved just so Anthony could be there when the family opened presents, and apparently I've been dating Anthony long enough that they gave me my own stocking! It had my name on it and everything. And they gave me a ton of cooking supplies like a cook book, frying pans, Tupperware, a spice rack [complete with some very awesome spices] and new pajamas. The pajamas are too big, but I love pajamas so I don't mind. I can just take them in a few inches.

I don't like Anthony's grandma, but other then that, it was fun. Due to how many people were in the house at once [Parents, sister, sister's boyfriend, sister's baby, aunt and uncle, grandma, five dogs, a cat, and us] we slept in a trailer outside the house. It was so cool...it was the kind of trailer you attach to the back of the truck to take camping, not the kind that you find in trailer parks]
Anthony's mom cut his hair. It's way too short now. I liked the fluffy. Now it's all gone and she cut it too close in one spot so he has this lovely bald spot.

And that is why I've been gone all week...for those of you who noticed I was gone all week.

~~~

Now for some original content:

Anthony wasn't able to visit his family for Christmas because all of Portland was pretty much snowed in [it went up to my KNEES. It was awesome!], so rather then accept that Christmas had gone by with out her two sons, Anthony's mom sneakily invited us down for New Years. Her brother and his wife picked us up on their way down from Washington and we made the supper long trip to visit the family.
We did in fact celebrate New Years the first night there, but the next morning we did Christmas. I wasn't expecting anything, but they got me quite a bit. New pajamas, slippers to match, a blanket to match, a travel kit, and a scarf [plus all the cooking stuff previously mentioned]. Some of the cooking stuff was labeled as being for Anthony, but we all really knew it was for me, and some of it was labeled for the both of us, but again, really for me.

Anthony doesn't cook or bake at all so he and I both agreed that if it was something for the kitchen, it was really mine. This meant some cool additions like a food processor, a cook book, and a thing to make bacon. The spice rack, the pans, and the Tupperware was all labeled for both of us, but as the only cook, it's totally all mine.

That thing is so cool too! It has all these different spices and herbs in fancy bottles and the rack totally matches the green dishes in my kitchen! And it smells sooo good.
Take a guess as to what my favorite thing was?

Anthony's sister is young and VERY social so she disappeared a lot to visit friends, but I went shopping with her twice [once for food, once for video games] and after she bought Wii supplies, she and I played Mario cart. I sucked, but I did manage to come in first place on a handful of races so I didn't completely suck...Just kinda. Anthony, despite not having a license or even knowing how to drive was able to beat us all. I smell conspiracy.

I did mostly have fun, but I am so glad to be back home. I found places for most of my new stuff, but mom recently sent my my sewing machine along with a wide range of other random stuff [including quite a few things I've been wanting, but not mentioning because I didn't "NEED" them] so I will need to do some sorting.
Most likely, I'm going to be scooting my computer over to the right side of my computer and trying to squeeze my machine onto my computer desk. Unless I buy a table and take over the living room, I don't really have anywhere else to put it.

]]> ~EvilAuthor http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/21877505/ http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/21877505/ Mon, 08 Dec 2008 07:24:12 PST
Back in high school when I wrote a lot, I did a very special parody fic to cheer up my friend Lala. I widdled down the cast to two main characters. Mary Sue and Mary Lou. They came from a story where all girls named Mary are part of a world wide organization. Mary Sue is the leader of a small local group that's "the best" of the best. Everyone in the group had special abilities [all Marys have powers, but whatever] and each one was a specialist in one of the fangirl arts.

Mary Sue was the Glomp Expert, Mary Lou had Squeaking Sonar, Mary Jane could locate cute things, Mary Joe had Detail Obsessive Memory, and so on and so forth. As leader, Mary Sue was required to be master of all the Fangirl Arts, but she was best at Glomping.

Glomping releases a special pheromone that renders the victim unable to move until released. Squeaking acts as an attack or getting a sonar image of the surrounding area. Finding cute things acts similar to sonar, but it can locate any cute thing in the area, even if buried, in a crowd, or non corporal. And the memory...it means remembering every detail of everything every exposed to the host. yea...Everything is super exaggerated in the story.

Anyway, yea. Mary Sue and Mary Lou wind up being the main people. Mary Lou is Sue's sidekick and they go off on adventures. The first adventure has everyone, but it was way too much to keep track of so I moved everyone else to background. The story has everyone traveling into fandoms. It's basically the literal Mary Sue/self insertion thing. At first, they try to be all "Of course we're supposed to be here, love us", but as time goes on they end up just recking havoc.

Since the story was meant to cheer Lala up, she's naturally Mary Sue and goes about doing the stuff Lala wishes she could do and has all her views...just exaggerated. She's in possession of a magic book that allows them to enter various dimensions. The pages are blank until she chooses where she wants to go.

The stories did the trick and Lala loved them. Of course, she declared me her sidekick so Mary Lou became me. Didn't mind, but I made changes to Mary Lou to make myself feel better about the role.



I found an old picture of the girls [colored version is in my gallery called "Mary Lou be Quiet"] and it made me want to pick them back up again. Mary Sue and Mary Lou were fun to write for since they were so silly.

Like everything else, I'll have the picture I did up as soon as I can get my hands on a scanner.

]]> ~EvilAuthor http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/21818205/ http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/21818205/ Thu, 04 Dec 2008 15:45:33 PST
In case you can't guess, I just saw Twilight. Loved it. Acting was a little iffy in some parts, but over all I enjoyed the hell out of it.

Just not in the way other people enjoyed it.


So I seem to have a fairly even amount of friends with opinions on Twilight. Half of the people who have an opinion loved it. The other half hated it and one even walked out. I'm not the type to form an opinion on something I've never read [without feeling guilty] or in this case, a movie.

I hobbled down to the theater [my knees don't like cold] and bought a ticket to the earliest showing of the film. I had HOPED that I'd be the only one in there since it's a school day, but there were a couple of other people. Made myself comfortable and watched the film [by the way, saw a few previews that looked good].

It was funny. It wasn't intended to be funny, but it was. Edward was creepy stalker, way too many people loved Bella. The geeky newspaper guy I can understand...Think his name was Eric, but he looked like a friend of mine...who is named Eric.
And her childhood friend, Jacob, makes sense because he's a childhood friend. That's how that works. You play together as kids and get attached. Ten years later, the girl has boobs and you get puppy love [heehhe...Puppy love. See? Funny stuff]

It irked me when she almost got hit by the car. Everyone ran over to see if she was ok. High school kids don't do that. If she was hurt and bleeding all over the place, maybe, but if otherwise it would have gone more like this:

Car: SCREEEEEEE
Bella: ACK!
Students: Hmm. That noise was mildly distracting. I'll text my friends and see if they know what it was.


I loved how Bella's smell was so freakishly important and Edward's actor did an awesome job of looking ill during biology.
I also love how the school apparently only has one teacher [according to the movie anyway]

In a few places, the acting was really forced. My best guess is that they condensed scenes from the book so they needed to squeeze as much content out of it as they could in as little time possible, but come out. Jacob's random unnamed friend [unnamed in the movie...he might be named in the book] has NO EXCUSE. If you only have one line, say it well. You'll stand a better chance at getting more acting jobs later if you do a good job the first time.

My friends who like Twilight will be happy that I loved the movie. My friends who hated it will be happy that I burst out laughing when Edward started glittering or any time he said something that was more creepy then it was romantic.

I might borrow the book from one of my friends, but I don't think I'll buy it.
I totally want the movie though. I enjoy comedies.

]]> ~EvilAuthor http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/21792673/ http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/21792673/ Tue, 02 Dec 2008 23:33:38 PST
Since all her kids are adults now, mom figured rather then buying toys for kids from whatever place she gets toys from...she'd take the toys of her children.

Now, I'm an adult. This shouldn't bother me...but mom picked the WORST THINGS TO GIVE AWAY. I means come on! You should have asked me first. She called me a few days ago on Sunday, but here it is two days later and it's already too late to tell her no.

See...I had this tin. It was decent size, larger then your average tin lunch box. Inside this tin, I stored a small collection. And by collection, I mean collector's items. Collector's items I was just thinking of how much their worth and if I should sell them on eBay now or wait another year or two to see if they're worth more. And she gave them away for FREE.

Sigh. I just ordered the last item from the collection last weeks so I'd have the full set when I sold them. Now I'm only going to have ONE of the set.

She also gave away a bunch of my stuff that I had been hanging on to for when I have kids. Stuff that I had in my room. Not the stuff in the attic where I don't even know what it is. Stuff in a basket in my room.

I couldn't be sure based on what she said, but she may have also taken a few of my beanie babies.

The thing to note here is that all this was MY STUFF. I have a sister. My sister has a wall of stuffed animals that she hasn't even looked at in seven years. This was all my stuff and the stuff she assured me she had left alone was the stuff I wouldn't have minded if she got rid of.

I had a gorilla that was given to me by my first boyfriend. I hated that guy even when I was dating him and I wanted to get rid of that damn monkey, but my sister gave me a huge guilt trip about it.
Mom thought it was very important to let me know THAT was still there. What the fuck mom? What the fuck? I've tried to sale that at yard sales before, but it's important to keep that and not the tin that I spent four year obsessively protecting?

There was a few collectables in the tin that I loved and had no interest in selling ever...I'm SO glad I brought those with me instead of leaving them in the tin

]]> ~EvilAuthor http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/21741095/ http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/21741095/ Sun, 30 Nov 2008 00:57:56 PST
I was peacefully reading some manga scans when I heard it. "F**k." I whirled around, but Anthony appeared to still be asleep. I stared at him for a while, but he didn't say anything else.

I'm not used to him cursing. It's just weird to hear that stuff from him, but since then I've heard it a lot.
It seems he got a game called "Left 4 Dead" and that game is the cause. When he plays it, it's a regular stream of obscenities. He curses the game, he curses the people he's playing with, he curses the zombies.

The foul words just keep coming out, but they stop when the game is turned off.

I like Kevin Smith and if you've ever watched his movies, he has a character who sings a full song that's 80% curse words. If language shocks me, that's a bad sign.

I asked Anthony about it and he said that's just what happens when you play video games [despite the fact I play video games too and have never once shouted obscenities at them].

So I wondered...What would happen if you took a child whom had never heard a bad word in all of their life and gave them a video game? I do mean never heard ANY bad words. No referring to people as female dogs, or cows, or camels [the French call people camels as a curse word]. No "Seven Words You Can't Say on TV". Nothing. Totally blank without so much as the dumbed down children curse words adult say to protect the innocent ears of the youth.

Would that child instinctively start cursing? Would they make up words that were just as bad [or worse] then current words? Or would they sit and show their distaste by just yelling "NO!" a lot?

]]> ~EvilAuthor http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/21710968/ http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/21710968/ Fri, 28 Nov 2008 07:07:32 PST
So I hopped on over there, waited in line to get into the store. I fought my way over to the Women's section and couldn't find the coat. Made my way to crafts and way going to buy some fabric and patterns [why was none of that stuff on sale?], but there was no one at the cutting table which means can't buy fabric. So I was going to just get the pattern. Grabbed the pattern, figuring that it was good enough to get that for the future...And I was trapped.

Like a rat in a very cruel maze kind of trap.
Think the movie "Labyrinth" when Sarah notices the wall moved.

Quite literally I had no way to move. The lines for the check out had gotten so long that they extended into the store and the row I was in was sealed off. I couldn't get out in either direction because people were literally bumper to bumper with carts...or trash cans full of stuff. I paced for a bit freaking out before someone finally let me out...though they didn't really want to. They tried to move the cart forward, but I yelped and pushed it back as I ran through the opening.

In the end, I gave up on buying the pattern and came home in failure. I didn't get the coat I had gone out for and I had totally failed in getting something I actually wanted.

Went out into the cold for nothing

]]> ~EvilAuthor http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/21623578/ http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/21623578/ Sun, 23 Nov 2008 00:52:44 PST
Want to know how I found out? Facebook.

I'm his child. And I found out through facebook.

I talked to my dad on the phone earlier today. A nice little 20 minute conversation. Plenty of time to mention that little bit of important information. Instead, I learn through a rather shallow website [sorry to those who like facebook, but it is shallow...I'm on it because Lala said to make an account].

I had commented on a friend's picture and I got an email saying he'd responded to my comment. I signed on to facebook to see what he said and I see that my dad's status claims him to be engaged.

I scrolled through my recent events. After all, dad said he was going to a big show with her tonight so if he updated his status today, I could assume he asked her at the show. It wasn't something he updated today.

I had to scroll all the way to the bottom of the page to see he'd changed it over a month ago.
Gee...I've talked to him a lot since then.


And dad wonders why my sister and I have been constantly annoyed with him for the last six months!

]]> ~EvilAuthor http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/21394688/ http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/21394688/ Sat, 08 Nov 2008 20:05:07 PST

1. YOUR REAL NAME:
Jennifer

2. YOUR GANGSTER NAME (first 3 letters of real name + izzle.
Jenizzle

3. YOUR DETECTIVE NAME (favorite color and favorite animal):
Purple Wolf (great, I'm a Power Ranger zord as a detective, LOL)

4. YOUR SOAP OPERA NAME (your middle name + street you live on/or neighborhood if it's a number):
Allyse Cook

5. YOUR STAR WARS NAME (the first 3 letters of your last name + first 2 letters of your first name):
Cra Je

6. YOUR SUPERHERO/CRIMINAL NAME (Your 2nd favorite color + favorite drink):
Black Pepsi [Aww. Lame.]

7.YOUR IRAQI NAME (2nd letter of your first name + 3rd letter of your last name + 1st letter of your last name + 2nd letter of your mom's maiden name + 3rd letter of your dad's name + 1st letter of sibling's first name + last letter of your mom's first name):
Eacnnjn

8. YOUR WITNESS PROTECTION NAME (parents middle name):
Lee Lee [Lame. Again]

9. YOUR GOTH NAME (black + the name of one of your pets):
Black Lilly

10. YOUR HOOD NAME (first 3 letters of your first name + iqua):
Jeniqua

]]> ~EvilAuthor http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/21323097/ http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/21323097/ Tue, 04 Nov 2008 17:37:37 PST
A while back...like three weeks or something, I had a dream that I remembered and I even managed to get to the internet before I forgot. By writing it down, I was able to remember it still.

The dream took place on a 1/3 scale pirate ship that was floating is a giant pool in a room with a very tall ceiling. I was on the ship and then I saw a dwarf doll. The dolls were insanely popular and hard to find [it was near Christmas in the dream], but the dolls were 'alive' and you had to kill them to play with them.

So I'm looking at the dwarf and it pulls out a knife, but since he was only a foot tall, it looked like a sword for him. Being unarmed, I picked up a 1/3 scale mop [to go with the pirate ship] and the dwarf and I began battle. I managed to get a really hard hit to the dwarf, but I lost my balance and fell into the pool. I looked up as I was sinking and saw the dwarf, but couldn't tell if I had managed to kill him or if he was coming after me [they're dolls. They can't blink so their button eyes are always open] so I was moving to get out from under him when I woke up.

Some of the details are foggy, like how I got onto a ship in the middle of a pool without getting wet, why there was a ship in a pool in the first place, or why the ship was at a reduced scale even though it was still clearly too big to be meant for the dwarves as a playset or something. I remember the dwarf in detail though. He had a round nose, a red beard, a viking hat, and little flat black button eyes.

Some on LAA was doing dream meanings, but with the fast pace of the forum, I never found out what my dream meant so it's still a mystery to me.

I MIGHT do a picture of my online persona battling the dwarf.

]]> ~EvilAuthor http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/21100006/ http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/21100006/ Tue, 21 Oct 2008 18:09:20 PDT
I know they have a seedy reputation, but I still want one. They look cool and I know me. I'd love sleeping on it.

The coolest bed I'd ever slept on was a king sized bed at the hotel where I spent Sakuracon '07. I flopped on it one direction, rotated and flopped again. No matter what direction I put myself, I couldn't touch one side with my feet and the other side with my hands at the same time.

A round bed would be like that all the time. They're round so they're the same width no matter how you turn. I've seen pictures of them and they just look cool. I'd be so happy curled up in a big round bed with pillows all over the place. Naturally, since there's no head of the bed, the pillows would be spread out to encourage rotation.

Or a bed that's in a wall. I have nesting instincts.

]]> ~EvilAuthor http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/20853021/ http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/20853021/ Mon, 06 Oct 2008 05:40:52 PDT
She is a Purple Spy from Switzerland. Code named Lavender, real name unknown.

SV 0972
Public Relations
Age: 24
Height: 4'11"
Hair: Blonde
Eyes: Blue
Distinguishing Features: None
Strengths: Organized. Serious, focused, and capable of being very patient. Excellent with computers and digital equipment.
Weaknesses: Aggressive.
Personality: Extremely serious and stiff while on duty, yet considerably softer when off duty or in break room.
Notes: Tends to be more aggressive with female agents. Male field partners recommended.

Violet is a short plump woman. Due to poor self image, she reacts harshly to other women. She has duel citizenship thanks to an American father. Her parents were divorced when she was young and she would spend the summers with her father and the rest of the year with her mother in Sweden. Violet's mother was a chef who used food as a comfort and a sign of affection. Her father was a military officer who remarried when Violet was a teenager. She was not invited to the wedding. Her step mother was an extremely vain trophy wife.
Since Violet's father ran the house like a barrack, she grew up in very physically fit, though he was very supportive of her weight and thought her healthier versions of the meals her mother taught her to make, his second wife loved to make snide comments about Violet's weight which lead to her poor self image and started her aggression towards other women.
The problem worsened in adulthood after her fiance invited her to his wedding to another woman...without having ended his engagement to Violet first. Violet had been unable to see her fiance due to her spy training so she wasn't angry with him, but thanks to a fat joke made at the wedding by the new bride, Violet has since become much more hostile.
However, thanks to the good relationship Violet had with her mother, she is capable of becoming close with other women over time, though it is a slow process...though bonding over food seems to help.



The other spy is Xander Stone.
Xander is another Purple spy who currently has no code name [Let Blank name him maybe?]

SV 0149
Field Agent
Age: 22
Height: 5'11
Hair: Blonde
Eyes: Green
Distinguishing Features: Scar on stomach and tattoo of an angel on right arm
Strengths: Weapons specialist. Skilled with computers
Weaknesses: Can't read people. Poor health as result of cancer during childhood.
Personality: Tends to use charm to get desired responses out people. Very sociable
Notes: Poor in social situations. Partner required at all times.

Xander moved to England when he was twelve in order to receive treatment for cancer. After six years in and out of treatment, he moved back home to Switzerland. Having grown up in a hospital, Xander has very poor social skills and bases his interactions with others on movies and TV shows.
Xander's parents were always stressed and rarely visited which worsened his social interactions. He became very attached to the nurses who kept him company so he is extremely fond of women and has developed the mind set that they should never be harmed.
Being physically weak, Xander chose to specialize in long range combat and weapons that don't require a lot of muscle. He hates up close encounters with enemy agents and tends to stay on the technical side in order to avoid contact.


Xander was placed into Violet's care as part of training. Since Xander has poor social skills, it was believed that he would benefit from being place under the mentor of an agent from Public Relations. Violet did not appreciate being placed in the field and originally felt like she was baby sitting the younger agent, but soon became protective of him. Her great physical health compensates for his weak conditions and she has recently started attempts at fattening him up.

]]> ~EvilAuthor http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/20852474/ http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/20852474/ Mon, 06 Oct 2008 04:23:08 PDT So I guess it should come as no surprise that now I just fucking BLEED at random. Yea. Random blood. I have that.
I thought I had gotten crumbs in my hair yesterday. I had been stealing Anthony's chips while he was watching Last Exile and he messed up my hair in revenge. Without even thinking, I tried to fix it, but remembered I'd been eating. I went to the bathroom to try to see if my hair was clean. Saw some white and scratched at it in an effort to pull it out and my head started bleeding. I don't have nails.
If you have ever looked at my hands, I keep my nails really short. It's not like I can accidentally cut myself with a scratch. I just bleed for no reason now apparently.

Ugh. Gonna make new spy profiles to cheer myself up.

]]> ~EvilAuthor http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/20772905/ http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/20772905/ Wed, 01 Oct 2008 08:10:51 PDT Tragically, as I've said before, I have no way to show anyone the picture I did of her. I show my stuff to my boyfriend, but he isn't very interested...Perhaps if I didn't constantly show him my art book...Oh well

ANYWAY, I'm posting her profile information now so I can lay claim to such things later if need be. It will all be reposted again when I can actually scan my picture.
Also, sorry for making yet another girl character. I swear I only do it because I use my reflection as reference most often.

379 - 1C
Field Agent
Age: 25
Height: 5'6"
Hair: Red
Eyes: Blue
Distinguishing Features: Dragon tattoo on left shoulder, piercing in upper right ear
Strengths: Undercover, infiltration, piloting
Weakness: Easily distracted, deaf in left ear, talkative
Personality: Extremely friendly and excitable. Has been described as being over dramatic.
Notes: Slightly flighty so keep a close eye on her to ensure she does not say too much. Undercover logs are detailed and in novel format. Works with a service animal so do not pair with agents that have allergies


This won't appear in the the personnel file, but I named her Candice [Candy] Williams. Her code name is Reule, which is a famous French wolf. She's part of the Red team, so I thought I'd toss in a reference to Little Red Riding Hood. French is a common language in Canada [where the Reds are from] which is why I went with that instead of the names I like better.

HOPEFULLY I'll be able to scan stuff soon...or at least take pictures and show off the pictures.


Updated the notes to include she has a service animal. The idea of giving her a dog came from a conversation with Komi as part of my little red riding hood reference. I was originally going to give her a small dog for humor reasons, however all my research indicates that small dogs have health issues that would either make the dog useless as a service animal for a deaf person, or they have problems that would make them unsuited for spy life.
Currently I'm most likely to give her a mutt. However, since I don't have a dog to use as reference, I want to give her a pure breed so I can just google references as needed. The two breeds I'm currently considering are Alaskan Malamute and Doberman Pincher. Both are considered working dog and have decent health. Malamutes are common in Alaska and Canada [where Candice is from] and Dobermans are often used for police or military work so both would be reasonable as being 'company issued'. Regardless what I pick, the dog will be named Edon. It's another French name referring to a wolf.

Wow...That update is almost enough to do another journal.
I'm also tempted to do a personnel file for Edon, but I think it'd be a tad silly.

]]> ~EvilAuthor http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/20735394/ http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/20735394/ Mon, 29 Sep 2008 04:07:51 PDT
Her name is Saintly. She's a blue English troll with a few liberties taken with her appearance. A full description of her will be provided once I scan my picture of her. It came out decently well and I'm glad that I've finally gotten my hands on a pencil so I could make a few corrections as I worked.

I'll be doing more artwork of other characters such as an actual drawings of Dante and Pietro. In short now that I found my art book again I'll be going nuts and doing a lot of art. The main question will be how much actually gets scanned once I get a scanner again...I had a lot that I never scanned and now I wish I had

]]> ~EvilAuthor http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/20629413/ http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/20629413/ Tue, 23 Sep 2008 02:35:44 PDT See, a friend of mine set one of the Dr. Horrible songs as his profile song on Myspace and I kind of went nutty. I'm a huge fan of musicals in general and I loved Dr. Horrible because the songs were funny, the acting was great, and the main character was an adorable nerdy villain. The best kind of villain there is!

So here I discover the songs are on myspace! I set one as my profile song, but then I try to remember if that was my favorite song or was my favorite part from a different song that wasn't on Myspace. Go to watch the Blog just to make sure that was in fact my favorite song and boom. Idea.

See, if you've never seen the blog, there's this one song where Billy [Dr. Horrible] and Penny [the girl he likes that's dating Billy's rival] are singing and they do this split camera thing where they're both leaning on a wall and they're back to back.

Which is where the idea comes in. See, Camellia kind of becomes evil after she goes crazy, but she goes through moods. It's kind of her light and dark sides colliding. She's likely to kill you no mater if she's in a light mood or a dark one, but whatever.
I liked the scene in the Blog because it reminded me of the old Sailor Moon opening where Bunny is leaning on a mirror and her reflection is Sailor Moon. It's two halves of One person back to back.

So I looked all over for the art book my mom recently mailed to me. I just had it a few days ago for Talk Like a Pirate Day, but I got moved to a new apartment [same complex, different building...that's its own blog] and apparently the book got lost in the move.

I tore open a few boxes and looked in every room of the apartment and just couldn't find it, however, I DID find the college ruled notebook my mom sent me when she mailed the art book...So even though it had lines, I opened it up and drew Camellia back to back with herself. They're both the halves of herself, but the dark side you can see the scar over her eye and for the light side, her hair is over it [a reference back to when I first drew Camellia with the scar and I had her try to hide it].

As soon as I finish the drawing, I look at the lined paper and start thinking about how when I finally get my hands on a scanner and some decent editing softwear, I'm gonna have to go in and remove all those blue lines.


Why is it I can never find my bloody art book when I need it? I had the same problem back in high school and that is why I don't have any of my work from back them posted online!

]]> ~EvilAuthor http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/20561699/ http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/20561699/ Fri, 19 Sep 2008 00:02:50 PDT
Before Camellia went insane [before she started wearing Dante's clothes], she did still wear dresses while on The Siren. Naturally, this wasn't logical attire to wear on a pirate ship so Dante actually cut her dresses to about knee length so she could move around. Camellia hated this and thought it was vulgar since this left her bloomers exposed.
Why did I mention this? Because the drawing of Camellia is her screaming "I'm not DECENT!"
I'm actually thinking of cosplaying this version of Camellia at some point. There is a pirate store at the Lloyd Center that has some very nice skirts that look like they were ripped. There isn't a fitting room so I haven't tried them on yet, but I'm actually thinking about getting one and cutting it to fit me.
They have some nice men's shirts [which I'd wear for Camellia regardless of which version I do of her], but they're thin and I'm worried I'd need to wear a corset just to avoid flashing people.

That all said, I will NOT being taking part in Talk like a Pirate Day on September 19th...Why? Because I'm going to the Pirate Festival this Saturday and I'll be doing all my pirate stuff then. I will be hanging out with Katie and Mr. Zach's Girly and fun will be had. Yay.
I need to build up my pirateness so it'll explode all at once.

On an unrelated note, I've realized I'm a bigger idiot then I thought.
Remember how in my last Journal, I said I was an idiot because I bought a GameCube game even though I have no GameCube at home.
I only just remembered I did in fact bring my Wii with me when I moved so I can play the game after all. GRAH! I should not be allowed to have Video Games!

]]> ~EvilAuthor http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/20547131/ http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/20547131/ Thu, 18 Sep 2008 02:10:04 PDT Anyway, while we were out and about, we went to a game store. I saw a Final Fantasy game I hadn't played yet and I turned to Mr. Zach's girly and said if you ignore the wire frame bra of one of the characters on the front, it'd be cute to cosplay...
So I bought the game and planed on playing it when I got home. If the character was fun, I'd add her to my cosplay list and just not make that stupid bra [it was just a wire cage so you could see her boobs weren't in there].

Tragically, I discovered something. I may have had a GameCube at home, but dad has refused to mail my things. My roommate has no GameCube. Which means I can't play the game I bought.

Naturally, having been denied, I went to the internet where I learned something. It turns out that the dorky kid on the box isn't the main character. You can pick one of four races and the character you make is the main...So that weird bird girl on the box I liked...Yea. She can be as cool or as dorky as I am. Which translates into no reason NOT to do this costume.

I looked up some pictures from the game and got a basic idea of what the bird people look like. Since I haven't play yet, I'm not sure if you can change their clothes and make them look however you want so I just took the basic elements for the females of the bird people and mixed, matched, and plotted original parts of the costume. I even drew up what I plan on doing for this costume when I get to it on my list [which I recently shorted by 10 costumes I wasn't still interested in]. BUT since I hated the wire frame bra, I replaced it with one of the simple vests the males of the bird people wear. Cheating, I know, but it looks better dammit...Though I foresee anyone familiar with the game calling me transgendered.

I'm actually pretty happy with the detail work I did on it and I've already started thinking where I can buy the things I need for the costume, but I can't show anyone the drawing for the same reason I can't play the game. My dad won't send me my scanner.

So in short, I should not be allowed near video games. It seems like every time I get excited about ANYthing, I want to cosplay it. My list is still long. I need to stop. I need an intervention or something.



Oh, and if you're curious, I'm referring to the Yukes from Final Fantasy Crystal Chronicles. They're cute bird people.
It'll be fun to make, but damn I have too many costumes on my cosplay list

]]> ~EvilAuthor http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/20416277/ http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/20416277/ Wed, 10 Sep 2008 00:48:09 PDT
Shortly after talking to the office about the new apartment [for those who didn't know, I'm moving to a new apartment in the same complex...the new one will be cheaper and there won't be a room that smells like pot because of bad former roommates] and we were asked about if we had any pets. We don't.

So when we got back home, I asked if we needed to pay a pet deposit for a caged animal like a rat...Because I want a rat. Badly. My roommate thought about it for a second and finally said it should be fine since the pet policy only mentions to cats, dogs, and fish tanks over 10 gallons. This implies that a fish tank less then 10 gallons is fine and you don't have to pay extra rent for it. So as long as I don't over do it on the rats, I don't need to pay $500 extra for the apartment [since I want the rats, the pet coat would fall on me].

But notice anything missing from the above mentioned? When I asked about rats, I wasn't told no. Naturally, since I don't live alone, if my roommate said no rats, they're be no rats. I'd pout, but that gets ignored anyway. In the entire exchange, the idea was never once put down. All I got was mild confusion as to why I'd want a rat in the first place!

Soooo I went to PetCo yesterday and looked at their rats. One of the girls who works there runs a Rat Rescue and she was pleasantly surprised by my questions! Apparently she's so used to people dumping rats on her, she thought I was trying to get rid of a rat, not take one.

She filled me in on a lot of details and even gave me a few links to Rat Rescue websites and told me which ones might be able to help me get a hairless rat.

Rats are social animals so I will be getting two rats. Ideally, both hairless, but one fuzzy one will be ok as long as the other one is hairless. It was recommended to get two girls since they adapt to new 'friends' the easiest in case I want more rats later.

Naturally, one of the rats will be named Blarg. Not sure what the other one will get named, but I'm sure I'll have a name picked out before the time comes.

Hopefully, I'll have the rats by Christmas or for my birthday. Expect pictures sometime in the next four months.



Name ideas are loved, but keep in mind they need to be either girl names or gender neutral...Like Blarg could work for anything.



EDIT: Ok...Apparently while rats are allowed, bald rats aren't. So two fuzzy rats it is

]]> ~EvilAuthor http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/20349524/ http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/20349524/ Fri, 05 Sep 2008 23:31:10 PDT Still mad someone tried this, but at least it should be all taken care of now.

]]> ~EvilAuthor http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/20300036/ http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/20300036/ Tue, 02 Sep 2008 23:12:36 PDT
I hung out with some friends on Thursday and then there was a few random adventures on Friday. I gotta say, I was pretty happy getting to hang out with Carly a bit on Friday night. We sat on the second floor stair landing and talked. It was an ego stroke to hear the all the laughing during one of my stories. And then I got to meet all of my con roommates.
I know I normally room with my boyfriend at cons, but we made our plans at different times so I was in a room with the Anime Hunters and he was in a room with other staff members and Bats.
Oh, Bats, sorry they kept you up all night the first night. I didn't know they were [i]all[/i] staff members.

Mostly, I did the con thing and ran around in circles with my friends. Yes, in circles. Normally that's an exaggeration, but we got lost a lot due to questionable layout. I have an issue with blurred time lines so I won't be giving a step by step description of the weekend, so I'll just say the major high lights!

My roommates, the Anime Hunters, were hosting the convention so I got the benefit of being awake and ready before all the major events like Opening Ceremonies and Cosplay Chess, but it also got me neat stuff like pizza. The people across the hall had pizza, and because I was with my more popular roommates, I got pizza too. I chipped in on the cost of the pizza, but I say $2.00 is a nice deal for two slices of pizza...plus however much Bats ate...I hung out with her the most out of everyone this weekend so she got a share of my fun.

Oh! I had a random panel. I requested a panel about six months ago and I thought it was rejected, but it was on the schedule so I had to throw together a panel. I really need to throw out a thank you to my friends who helped me make it a GREAT PANEL! Random Dancing Kid acted as my DJ and I had three wonderful judges [Bats as the Ninja Judge, Kuro as the Natural Judge, and um...not sure what her online handle is sooo...one of my roomies as the Pirate Judge] and I was able to pull off an hour long panel. I didn't go over and I didn't get stuck with lots of left over time.
The panel was a dance off. Nine rounds, two contestants per rounds. One pirate. One ninja. With a score of five to four, pirates won. Hehe. I also made Mr. Zach dance as a half time show. Due to the fact I didn't know I was having the panel, I didn't have my original prizes ready, but since he's my buddy, I'll be able to make him the actual reward later on.

After the panel, Kuro kindly invited me to join her on a quest to Denny's. I wasn't hungry, but I kind of knew that if I stayed in the room, I'd sleep and I wasn't ready to sleep yet. We randomly adopted a few people in the lobby including a very excited Vash cosplayer. He seemed really happy about going to Denny's, but we never made it there. Ended up at MacDonalds and then we were to an all night Mexican place...It was a very odd 2am quest, but hey. It was fun.

The last day was a tad more crammed. I was in Cosplay chess. I didn't get to kill anyone first round, but my side won so we got to do another round and I killed two people! One, I 'killed' by taking him home and adding him to my collection. The other, I strangled and tried to steal his weapon. Then Ryuk killed me. Squee.

I didn't bring home much in the ways of swag, but Anthony pulled some strings and got me a 'cell charm' which I will turn into a bookmark since I'm worried about damaging it. It's cute so I'm happy with it, but it won't last for the intended purpose. I also got a book for my friend Phantasm. It'll be a nice little Christmas gift and I'm sure he'll enjoy it!

But yes...That's the highlights. I also went shopping with a few people, got to meet Mr. Zach's girlie, and I helped finish some unfinished props. It was a good weekend. Yay.

]]> ~EvilAuthor http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/20202303/ http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/20202303/ Thu, 28 Aug 2008 13:34:40 PDT
So it's a small chance, but the chance is there and they called me. Calling me is a good sign.

Flail.

]]> ~EvilAuthor http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/20194608/ http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/20194608/ Thu, 28 Aug 2008 01:20:00 PDT
Anyway, I just got done making the muffins and that little trick I did with my new Food Network idea turned out great. Better then great. I am the new God of Muffins.

...In case you were wondering, my 'gourmet' chocolate chip muffins are totally kick ass.

I made them for my roommates at Kumoricon, which is this weekend. If I don't eat all the muffins before then, I foresee myself being praised for these treats.

]]> ~EvilAuthor http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/20141370/ http://EvilAuthor.deviantart.com/journal/20141370/ Mon, 25 Aug 2008 02:49:11 PDT This is ideal money wise, but it means we're still living with the old roommates. Rachael and her boyfriend David. Rachael is unofficially my boyfriend's adopted sister. She was best friends with Anthony's little sister so since I get along with his sister so well, I figured it wouldn't be a problem living with her for a month.


A few days ago, I was gonna do my laundry. I gathered up all my dirty clothes and stepped out into the hall and I see Rachael standing naked at the washing machine. In her defense, the washing machine is directly across from her bathroom and she's used to a roommate that sleeps until 3 or 4 in the afternoon so she probably thought she'd be safe darting out of the bathroom naked so early in the day. I just quietly went back into my room and ended up washing my clothes on a different day.

Today, I got told that if I got hungry, there was still a few slices of pizza left over from two days ago and I could heat some up if I got hungry. About an hour after my roommie left for work, I headed out into the kitchen to heat up the pizza and I see Rachael's boyfriend naked at the fridge. I turned on my heal and went back into my room. I gave him half an hour to either stop being naked or return to Rachael's room, but when I went back out I see him and Rachael both naked on the couch.
Needless to say I ate my pizza cold and haven't gone back out of my room since then.

So I got to wonder. Do I not come out of my room often enough? It really seems like they forgot I live here now. I personally thought I went into the living room fairly regularly. When I get a phone call, I go out there so I don't bother people that are sleeping, I eat my sandwiches it out there, I keep sandwich stuff in the fridge. It's not like I stay in the room and never leave. WHY does she walk around the house naked?

I've always thought Naked Time was saved strictly to the bedroom or bathroom. Places where you can keep the door shut. If you don't live alone, it's not something that should ever venture out from those two areas.

I've never lived away from my parents before so I never had rules for roommates, but even though everything is perfect with my ACTUAL roommate, I need to make a list of rules for if I ever have other roommates and conditions on naked time will be at the top of the list.

]]> ~EvilAuthor