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        <title>deviantART: by:IblisBlaser</title>
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        <copyright>Copyright 2009, deviantART.com</copyright>

        <pubDate>Sat, 05 Dec 2009 09:41:53 PST</pubDate>        
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                  <item>
                <title>To Every Girl</title>
                <link>http://IblisBlaser.deviantart.com/journal/28191786/</link>
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                <pubDate>Sat, 07 Nov 2009 05:38:03 PST</pubDate>
                
                <description><![CDATA[ girls who agree repost.<br />and to the few guys who have balls and agree repost this<br /><br />To every girl that dresses cute not skanky<br /><br /><br />To every girl who wants to be called beautiful not hot.<br /><br /><br />To every girl that will spend her whole day looking for the perfect present for you.<br /><br /><br />To every girl who gets her heart broken because he chose the whore instead.<br /><br /><br />To every girl that would die to have a decent boyfriend.<br /><br /><br />To every girl who would just like once to be treated like a princess.<br /><br /><br />To every girl that cries at night because of another heartbreak.<br /><br /><br />To every girl that wont get down on her knees and open her mouth just to get a boyfriend.<br /><br /><br />To every girl that just wants to hold hands.<br /><br /><br />To every girl that kisses him with meaning.<br /><br /><br />To every girl who just wishes he cared more.<br /><br /><br />To every girl who would just once want a guy to give their jacket up when they are cold.<br /><br />To every girl who just wants him to call.<br /><br /><br />To every girl who lies awake at night thinking about him.<br /><br /><br />To every girl that just wants to cuddle.<br /><br /><br />To every girl that is SCARED to put her heart Out There again because she has been HURT tooo many times or so badly.<br /><br /><br />To every girl who shows how much she cares and gets nothing back.<br /><br /><br />To every girl that thought maybe this could be the one and instead got her heart ripped out.<br /><br /><br />To every girl that believes in her dreams.<br /><br /><br />To every girl that would do anything so she could achieve those dreams.<br /><br /><br />To every girl that laughs at stupid stuff when she actually doesnt think it is funny.<br /><br /><br />To every girl who is just looking for that one and only and is having a rough time along the way.<br /><br /><br />To every girl that has been cheated on because shes not a whore who gives it up to any guy.<br /><br /><br />To every girl that doesnt want a guy who just plays with her emotions but actually cares about how she feels.<br /><br /><br />To every girl that fell for all the lies only to find themselves alone in the end.<br /><br /><br />To every girl that gave her heart away to have it shoved back in her face.<br /><br />...this one's for you.<br />And REMEMBER girls... a lot of these apply to the guys too. For as many despicable men there are out there... there's a woman just as bad.<br /><br /> ]]></description>
                <author>~IblisBlaser</author>
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          <item>
                <title>OMFG YOUMACON BITCHES</title>
                <link>http://IblisBlaser.deviantart.com/journal/28070620/</link>
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                <pubDate>Sat, 31 Oct 2009 16:45:44 PDT</pubDate>
                
                <description><![CDATA[ So like Youmacon rocks and like it makes me happy since I met the man I have admired since I was like ten years old and longed to meet. When I found out he was going to be here I was like SQUEE!!!! and all happy and stuff and didn't realize how excited I was to be able to meet him. I first talked to him when I was in a panel called, The Ethics of Death Note since he is the voice of Light Yagami and I asked him to say something in Kurt's voice and he said the funniest things. <br />1. The chicks love the fuzzy dude. <br />2. I love the smell of bacon in the morning. <br />3. Kitty!!! No!!!!!!<br />Then he hugged me and I was like OMG I LUFF YOU! I was so happy like my voice was all high pitched and I was like, Thank you so much!!! You are my hero!!!! and he was like your welcome in the same pitched high squeaky voice as me!!!!!!!! I was so happy and I saw him when I was walking and said Hi Brad in a high squeaky voice and I felt so retarded, but he was like Hi and gave me a sucker!!!! He is so sweet I wanted to take him home with me, but I won't or they will have to cancel X-Men: Evolution!!!!!!!!!!<br /><br /> ]]></description>
                <author>~IblisBlaser</author>
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          <item>
                <title>WOOT!!!!!!!</title>
                <link>http://IblisBlaser.deviantart.com/journal/27683456/</link>
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                <pubDate>Sat, 10 Oct 2009 08:53:39 PDT</pubDate>
                
                <description><![CDATA[ After much thought and stressful waiting I am allowed to go to Youmacon on October 30th and I am going as Edward Elric from Fullmetal Alchemist. I am so excited and I figured out I can do my hair like his although it is a little bit to short, but oh well. I am going to upload pictures and it is so funny because I got his little anntena thing right and I was giggling about it and poking it. I also got my bangs to go up then down like his. I am so excited and my stepdad is taking me to see if the halloween store near the mall has a costume that is cheaper than the one I am going to order if the halloween store doesn't have it. I want to get an automail arm, but there is no way to find one since I've looked everywhere and I don't have the time or money to make an arm so if I don't make one I am just going to wear gloves. Oh well, my friend is going as Roy Mustang and she is excited to meet Travis Willingham, the voice actor of Roy Mustang and I am excited to meet Kyle Herbet the voice actor of Kiba from Naruto and Vato Falman from Fullmetal Alchemist and Brad Swaile who did the voice of Light Yagami from Death Note and Nightcrawler from X-men the anime cartoon (yes I love X-men and Nightcrawle happens to be my favorite). <img src="http://e.deviantart.net/emoticons/b/biggrin.gif" width="15" height="15" alt=":D" title=":D (Big Grin)" /> I am so happy I could jump around my house all day screaming. I am so happy to be going and all and on the 30th my two friends and I who are going are going to dress in our costumes since it is a friday and the day before Halloween and parade around the school dressed up all day. I think that will be fun and then I get to see who my other friend is dressing up as since she won't tell us. GRRRRRRRR. Damn her to hell XD JK I love her very much and would never damn her to hell... although she does keep glomping me, but that is because we keep calling her Armstrong XD she hates it, but it is so funny. I hope to see some people at Youmacon there <img src="http://e.deviantart.net/emoticons/b/biggrin.gif" width="15" height="15" alt=":D" title=":D (Big Grin)" /> Love you all talk to you soon I hope.<br /><br /> ]]></description>
                <author>~IblisBlaser</author>
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          <item>
                <title>NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!</title>
                <link>http://IblisBlaser.deviantart.com/journal/27224467/</link>
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                <pubDate>Tue, 15 Sep 2009 09:46:31 PDT</pubDate>
                
                <description><![CDATA[ Okay so this morning I woke up and I couldn't move my arms and back without tearing up. So I went to my mom and she freaked out because my eyes were bugging out of my head. I was in so much pain I was crying. She called the doctors and they said I have a mild case of sun poisioning. I was like fuck this if mild is like this I am never getting burned ever again. I don't know when I will be going back to school, but my mom told me I had to stay out of the sun and drink lot's of water. I wanted to scream when I heard I had mild sun poisioning because I was hoping the pain would stop, but it keeps staying there. I can't even lay on my back. It hurts so bad I want to shoot myself. This is so not worth staying home! Gahhhhhhhh! I want to rip my head off!!!!!!!!!!!!<br /><br /> ]]></description>
                <author>~IblisBlaser</author>
            </item>
          <item>
                <title>Pain!</title>
                <link>http://IblisBlaser.deviantart.com/journal/27205648/</link>
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                <pubDate>Mon, 14 Sep 2009 08:53:06 PDT</pubDate>
                
                <description><![CDATA[ so I went to the beach yesterday and I didn't put on any sunscreen so I got really badly burnt. I called my mom from school and had her come pick me up. I am at home now with a gigantic ice pack on my back. I am in super bad pain and it hurts to touch my shoulders and arms. I am super bored and can't sleep even though I didn't get any sleep because I was tossing and turning, not to mention I look ridiculous with my hair pinned up on the top of my head and clothes that are too big for me and super thin, also I am bright red. My friend's mom said I was glowing red and I got teased by my friend that I will be easy to find. I am sitting in my awsome blue chair that is really not great for my back since I put my feet on my bed and have a blanket over them. I am sitting in front of my window and the wind feels good on my back, my legs, not so much. I don't understand how I can fall asleep in class and not fall asleep when I am at my house. If I had been asleep this morning I could have slept till noon. I think I will try sleeping at my desk and see if I can sleep there since I am addicted to sleeping on desks. XD I really wanted to be at school today, but I was in too much pain to focus on school work. Anyways I am going to get off because I have homework I am supposed to be doing. Bye ttyal<br /><br /> ]]></description>
                <author>~IblisBlaser</author>
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          <item>
                <title>Bad News</title>
                <link>http://IblisBlaser.deviantart.com/journal/26239809/</link>
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                <pubDate>Tue, 28 Jul 2009 18:24:05 PDT</pubDate>
                
                <description><![CDATA[ well I was going to get on here and put up this journal on Monday of last week, but I was too tired and confused and put it off repeatedly. My brother ran away again and he is not allowed back. I knew where he was two days ago, but he left his friend's house saying he was going home, but he didn't come home. I have moved into his room even though it is very uncomfortable to accept he isn't allowed back. Me moving into his room is like saying he isn't every welcome back. I am still having trouble sleeping and only get about an hour of sleep. I realized I download music from random music sites when I am depressed. Not much to say besides that. So I guess I will stop so I don't waste all of you guy's time.<br /><br /> ]]></description>
                <author>~IblisBlaser</author>
            </item>
          <item>
                <title>Cherry Fest...</title>
                <link>http://IblisBlaser.deviantart.com/journal/25926713/</link>
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                <pubDate>Mon, 13 Jul 2009 18:01:48 PDT</pubDate>
                
                <description><![CDATA[ Me and two of my friends went down to Cherry Fest and hung out. I pulled a tendon in my right leg and it hurts to walk and move. I got really sunburned, but I am alright with that since I am not dead white and look like a cancer patcient which people at Target asked. It was embarrasing so I told them I was just a really white kid. I think it is because of me not eating anything, but I don't mind. I remember being about the same shade of white when I lived with my grandparents. I just realized I was really sheltered there. I was never told the truth and locked inside their house like I was a hostage. Wow my mind is really flooded. My memory is scattering and I barely remember stuff. I can remeber unimportant stuff, but it is hard to remeber the important stuff. Maybe I am going insane... possibly? Who knows, all I know is I am suffering from memory loss. Oh well. Amesia is fun <img src="http://e.deviantart.net/emoticons/s/smile.gif" width="15" height="15" alt=":)" title=":) (Smile)" /> God I am bored and no one wants to hang out with me. I want a buddy to hang out with, I got no one. DX<br /><br /> ]]></description>
                <author>~IblisBlaser</author>
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          <item>
                <title>Pain</title>
                <link>http://IblisBlaser.deviantart.com/journal/25476858/</link>
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                <pubDate>Mon, 22 Jun 2009 15:07:35 PDT</pubDate>
                
                <description><![CDATA[ Got back from my shitty vacation. I am sunburn badly and have bruises on my arms. The bruises are from my brother punching me and the sunburn hurts like hell. I can barely lift my arms and it hurts to lay down. My step grandma and stepdad fought over random shit the whole time and my grandma is a douche bag. She called my house everyday for the ten days I was gone asking why I wouldn't call her. Then I got two emails from her telling me I was being disrespectful and how she did nothing wrong to deserve the cold shoulder. Then I got a letter from her saying she was the only legal grandparent I had and I was so pissed. She also disrespected my stepdad and his family. My stepdad has been more of a father then my fucking ass father, who is out who knowns where doing dope and getting girls knocked up. she blames all of it on my mom and considers my mom to be holding me hostage. Then at the end she said I hope that you are glad Codi is back. Whenever she talks to me it is never about me because I am her little fucking messanger and it is really pissing me off.<br /><br /> ]]></description>
                <author>~IblisBlaser</author>
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          <item>
                <title>Not much to say...</title>
                <link>http://IblisBlaser.deviantart.com/journal/25018617/</link>
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                <pubDate>Fri, 29 May 2009 16:34:46 PDT</pubDate>
                
                <description><![CDATA[ I am in a hell lot of trouble. I have lost twenty pounds in a month. That is called anorexia my dear children. DON'T DO IT! I know I am retarded for doing it, but my depression is totally making me lose it. My mom is really pissed at me for it and she calls me names about it. I know it sounds cruel and it hurts my feeling, but at least she is being honest. That is all I want. A little honesty. People have always told me shitty lies or lead me on to believe one thing or another. To bad I hate life and lost trust in everyone. I can even trust myself since I say I will stop cutting then turn around cut the hell out of my arm or I say I will stop moping around and end up moping more. I am a crappy friend and take my anger out on anyone around me. I blew up when my friend mentioned something that really pissed me off. I felt like such a bitch, but she was the one apologizing. That is a bunch of crap. She had no reason to apologize. I hate myself. HATE MYSELF! I know if my friend Mist sees this I am going to get hugged to death on Sunday. The only good thing is Sunday. Me and my friends are going to the movie theater to watch a movie. Too bad everyday can't be Sunday. I don't want my birthday to come next week and I don't want time to move on. I want it to be Sunday forever. I know that sounds selfish and it is meant to. I AM A SELFISH BITCH! I know it sounds like I am being a brat, but I am so go ahead and yell at me. My grandma and great grandma turned their backs on me so why no everyone else turn their backs on me. My brother hates me which isn't a suprise since I would hate me too if I told our mom who he was dating and what I was told she was doing. Yeah I am a jerk and I would give myself the cold shoulder too. I have to go see a family counciler for my brother's problem and I refuse to talk. It makes me angry that he is always defended by my grandparents and step grandparents. Like when my grandma said me and my little sister get away with murder. Bull shit. I get in trouble when I do stuff wrong just like Cody and Emily does too. I know my grandma hates me for that fucking statement. She was always saying how Cody is a good kid and my mom is just being to hard on him. I want to tell her to shut her fucking mouth because she has no clue what the hell she is talking about. I am sick of her anyways. She called me last weekend to tell me she sent money for my birthday and money for my brother and told me to make sure he gets it. She never once said I hope you have a good birthday next weekend since you won't be home to talk to me. It's like Cody is the only grandchild she has and only wants to talk about him. "How's Cody?" "what's Cody up to?" "could you make sure Cody calls us?" "tell Cody we love him." "why don't you ever answer our messages? We want to know if Cody is alright." "Mamaw was afraid something was wrong with Cody." it's never, "hey cheyanne what are you up to?" "how's school?" "what are you planning to do for your birthday?" I am sick of being ignored by my own grandma. It isn't fair. I am just there or what. They talk to Cody for hours on the phone, but as soon as I get on the phone it's, "well Chey, just wanted to say hi to ya. I better go so I don't raise your mom's phone bill." What happened to the loving grandma I used to talk to for hours on end about pointless stuff and random teenage drama. I depended on them as support. They are becoming like my father, to me at least. I think all my connections with my dad's side of the family are ending. Not like I knew my mother's side, but now my father's. I lived with them for a little less then half of my life. They were the only real family I had besides step family. I guess I should just forget my real family and consider my step family my only real family.<br /><br /> ]]></description>
                <author>~IblisBlaser</author>
            </item>
          <item>
                <title>Help?</title>
                <link>http://IblisBlaser.deviantart.com/journal/24775958/</link>
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                <pubDate>Fri, 15 May 2009 19:22:57 PDT</pubDate>
                
                <description><![CDATA[ My brother ran away to stay with his friend and I am worried about him. My parents don't want to do anything to help him and he barely has any clothes. I feel the need to bring him clothes on Monday, but then I would be a bad daughter for disobeying my parents. I think I am going to go insane and now my parents are going to allow him to continue the last three weeks of school then send him to live with my grandma in Texas and I don't know what to do. I wish I could just make the whole thing reverse. I can't though so I guess I have to get over it. I think my family is screwed up anyways, but now this. God I hate my life. No wonder I am a total wreak. I am falling apart and think I am losing my sanity although I think I lost that when I started cutting. I really need help so anyone who wants to make a suggestion feel free, but I don't think it will work. I just want to be able to be happy for real again since I was usually always happy and now not so much.<br /><br /> ]]></description>
                <author>~IblisBlaser</author>
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          <item>
                <title>Fake Friends</title>
                <link>http://IblisBlaser.deviantart.com/journal/24587173/</link>
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                <pubDate>Mon, 04 May 2009 16:05:14 PDT</pubDate>
                
                <description><![CDATA[ REPOSTED : "No offense, but ... People are getting too fake on me. They only want posts, comments, or to see how many friends they can get. So let's see who will actually repost this. This is a test to see who's paying attention. This is a test to see how many people in my friends list actually pay attention to me. Copy and repost in your own bulletin. Lets see who the true friends are and I think I know who you are... Repost this if you are a friend...Don't reply... just copy and paste this in a new bulletin as "Fake Friends".<br /><br />True friends will read and repost this. Fake friends will just ignore it.<br /><br /> ]]></description>
                <author>~IblisBlaser</author>
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          <item>
                <title>Back</title>
                <link>http://IblisBlaser.deviantart.com/journal/24536667/</link>
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                <pubDate>Fri, 01 May 2009 19:11:32 PDT</pubDate>
                
                <description><![CDATA[ I am back for the time being, but I am a little distracted and don't know what is going on half the time. I have little opinion and voice hardly any of it when I do. anyways I am back and like whatever.<br /><br /> ]]></description>
                <author>~IblisBlaser</author>
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