http://search.deviantart.com/?q=by:Jjnnyrr&section=today deviantART RSS for by:Jjnnyrr en-us Copyright 2009, deviantART.com Tue, 15 Dec 2009 10:36:23 PST deviantART.com http://blogs.law.harvard.edu/tech/rss http://s.deviantart.com/minish/widgets/apple-touch-icon-precomposed.png http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/24607053/ http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/24607053/ Tue, 05 May 2009 18:25:14 PDT
Anywho, school is wrapping up for the semester and my trials with my new school are just about worked out (hopefully).

My semester was pretty light, with just two classes and both Independent Study. So I had the opportunity to basically decide what I'd be doing with my semester. A valuable lesson in how I don't thrive in unstructured environments or with self-imposed deadlines.

This past April, I got to return to the Rainy Kingdom and I dragged with me. We took in the sights of Sakura-con and generally practiced bad consumerism at the many, many vendor booths. It was glorious. But that may just be because I was hopped up on lattes the whole time. Soooo glorious.

Also working on some new inking techniques/tools. I've extolled the virtues of brush pens to my friends for a while, but never really took the time to figure them out in any real depth. I just liked how they had a nice variable line quality, but I had no control over it.

Now I'm working on getting that control. And its brutal. I'm spazzing all over my art work and making a terrible mess of what I considered fairly decent pencil work. Its killing me on the inside, but I'm going to learn these pens even it kills someone. Preferably other than me.

Working on some PShop goodness too, but I've never really embraced technology in my art to the extent that just about everyone else has. I should work on that.

Well, seems I've made a list of stuff to work on, so I'm getting to that now.

]]> ~Jjnnyrr http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/22164503/ http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/22164503/ Wed, 24 Dec 2008 11:27:00 PST
Semester is over and I have survived (with fairly good grades, to boot). Next semester is going to be a bit more free-form and I will be off to Seattle to partake of the Sakuracon goodness!

A decent year to look back on and a good year to look forward to.

I hope everyone is having a great Christmas and looking forward to good 2009.




]]> ~Jjnnyrr http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/20721264/ http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/20721264/ Sun, 28 Sep 2008 10:34:27 PDT
SO I've downloaded some of Macross Frontier from across the vastness of cyberspace, and I have to say my trials and tribulations were not in vain. A thoroughly enjoyable story that maintains the two conventions of music and action-packed transforming mecha battles. I saw the series (as much of it as I have seen) as a kind of return to the basic story of the original Macross, which was a good thing in my opinion. Reminded me a bit of how Gundam Seed was a kind of re-imaging of Mobile Suit Gundam.


Good times.

In school news, it moves a-pace. I seem to have found myself the Art Club Vice President, which was not something I planned on when I was first conned into sitting in on the meetings. So now on top of homework, I have club activities.

/sigh.

In more pleasant news, I'm working on several projects for art class that I am optimistic will turn out quite excellent. Its a bit of experimentation for me, changing a few things around, trying out a few new and uncomfortable media and all that jazz.

Saw the Presidential debate. Now I make it no secret that I'm all for Obama, but even I felt he kind of pulled a few punches. I can forgive that, its called being a Statesman. Its a sign of maturity that he was really there for the issues (imo). What ended up killing me inside was everytime Obama utter'd something to the effect of "McCain is right."

Arg!

The ultimate soundbite and he's just giving it to him! I felt it was more than made up for by McCain's childish attitude at the podium, which simply confirmed for me McCain has no business in politics, much less the Oval Office.

Of course, the real gem of the debate was when McCain appears to have mutter'd 'horseshit' under his breath twice while Senator Obama was talking.

Here's the link to a fairly decent clip with passable audio, so feel free to judge for yourself. Some have argued he's saying "of course" sarcastically... yeah, right.

[link]

/rant off ]]> ~Jjnnyrr http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/20411943/ http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/20411943/ Tue, 09 Sep 2008 18:13:53 PDT
So yeah... I need to update this thing.

Schools back in. Math something, Advanced Art, Intermediate Sculpture, Desktop Publishing and Graphic Design. I'm a busy cat.

Two weeks in, I get hit by an uber flu, so I'm laid up trying to figure how lying in "bed" can be production for me. Not a happy camper at the moment. Oh well.

Got some more arts in the works and hopefully will finish some of the collabs we have going.

Not much else.

Oh yeah, I'm even older now, so stop lolly-gagging you lil' whippersnappers.

/rant off ]]> ~Jjnnyrr http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/14925981/ http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/14925981/ Fri, 05 Oct 2007 11:46:59 PDT
So...

I'm in one of those critical thinking classes (mostly because I got a D in the last one) and we're discussing the issue of justice.

Now, first off, let's get something straight. Everyone believes in justice, we just have different mechanics. A thief in the U.S. goes to jail while a thief in Saudi Arabia may lose a hand.

OK, so my rant is about American Justice. We all believe it has a lot of good points to it (intact limbs) and that it seems to work... more or less. We extol its virtues all the time. "Innocent until proven guilty" (unless its in the news), Right to a fair trial (unless you're an enemy non-combatant) and that whole freedom of speech, religion, expression, yada, yada, yada. Just don't talk bad about the administration or they'll 'free speech' your credibility into the toilet of public opinion.

I'll admit I'm cynical about the state of affairs in our once great nation. I find myself asking "so who's going to pick up the torch of justice and freedom now that we (as a nation) have set it down?" And we have set the torch down. Rendition, torture, Gitmo, the Patriot Act, hypocritical non-proliferation, Abu Ghraib, Blackwater, NSA spy programs and Presidential saves for felons.

It feels like I'm living in two nations sometimes. One with an ideaology and belief in justice and one with an agenda and a Machiavellian approach to achieving it. When does what our nation stands for stop being important? At what point do we set aside what makes out country great to make our country strong? Why do we need to sacrifice our values to prove our righteousness?

I ask this because I see a disparity between what I believe is 'right' and what our leaders deem 'necessary'. I was taught as a youngling that what was necesssary for America was right for everyone. Clearly not the case. Don't believe me, ask an Iraqi. Better yet, an Afghan (only because no bothers to ask them. Bet they have a lot to say by now.)

And what does our nation get stirred by? Britaney losing her kids. Like this was a surprise? Out all night clubbing, driving with kids down the wrong side of the road and developing a serious drinking problem. Sounds like some white-trash mother out a trailer park sans the paparazzi.

Or there's Larry Craig. Gay or not gay? What? Feet touching in bathroom stall? SO WHAT? How is being gay an issue compared to how he legislates? What? If he's ACTUALLY gay this makes him a hypocrite? And this makes him different from any other politician how?

/sigh

But my real point is, if American Justice and Values are so great that we want to import this grand ideaology to other nations ("Hello Iraq, this is Freedom beating down your door and taking familiy members away at night.") why does it not apply to them?

Seriously. Every one of those poor bastards in Gitmo has been denied a trial. Has been denied access to our legal system. Hell, they can't even get into a Military Court. Why? Because they're not Americans.

Wait a sec. Isn't it our wonderful Justice System that we want to install in Iraq? So where's their Freedom of Speech? Their right to counsel. A speedy trial? Where is the list of the charges? Where is their public trial?

It has become clear to me that our leaders do not believe in America. Their's is an ideology of feudal commitment to those who contribute to their cause. They have twisted and turned our rights, our values, our sacred beliefs that made this nation so hopeful into something in where Capitalism is the greater part of our Democracy.

So my question remains, if our way of doing things is so damn great, why doesn't it apply to everyone?

/rant off ]]> ~Jjnnyrr http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/11593555/ http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/11593555/ Sat, 27 Jan 2007 22:44:34 PST
Anywho. Semester One of my return to school completed.

English 1A (Critical Analysis) B
Intro to Speech A
American History A
Art Appreciation A

So far, so good. Have two Art classes, Constitutional Law and Anthropology now. Art supplies are killing me and the reading is a lot more than I expected. Probably for the best. Wasn't expecting my degree to be an easy ride anywho. Hoping it would be, but not expecting it.

/sigh.

Got stuff in the works, but I'm not really rushing at it, because I'm working on getting a new comp, WHICH hopefully will run better than Lappy.

(you know I love you, Lappy)

Other than that, its just a matter of getting use to living at home... with my parents... in a strange... city... in California...

Its gonna be awhile.

Nyar.

Anywho... where's my pillow...

]]> ~Jjnnyrr http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/9970359/ http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/9970359/ Mon, 04 Sep 2006 20:46:43 PDT
Actually liking my classes a nice perk too. The schedule isn't too pressing, which works out well for me. Finishing a paper for American History and then I have to work on a speech due on Monday. Plus I have to study for a few exams as well, but my worries are neglible on that front. Tests never scare me.

I've posted a few new pieces and re-posted some old pics I had taken down. Still struggling to finish Mithra in Snow, which is what passes for a big project for me. Looking like it'll be a total of 24 Photoshop hours to get done. And there are projects lined up behind it as well.

Good times.

Been messing around with my assorted pencils and charcoals a little bit lately as well. I feel those skills are atrophying a bit after years of not being used much. Need to flex my patience muscles again. Got one or two ideas for a pencil'd imaged with the whole shading thing. I also have a few really old mixed media pen & pencil pics I've been putting off for about five years or so. The forms bother me now, but the design of the pic just begs for completion.

Oh yeah, I can taste the crazy now.

Well that's all in my world right now. Back to studying.

Where's my pillow... ]]> ~Jjnnyrr http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/9815764/ http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/9815764/ Tue, 22 Aug 2006 12:25:58 PDT
School started last week, and I have not been a full time student since I was 18.... 13 years ago.

*sighs*

In some regards, I knew what to expect and cringed. In others, I had no clue and yelped when they bit.

Professors seem averse to writing on boards nowadays, which is quite annoying when they state that their exams are based on their lectures. They all talk too fast and I have to play a guessing game as to which part of what they're saying is most important to write down, because I can't write all of it. Grrr...

The thing I had expected was lots of reading and writing. Essays are some kind of perverse hobby for professors, who I know don't actually want to read 400+ papers, some of which detail all the failings of high school english courses of today's education system. Lucky for them, I'm at least passable (if not, I daresay, a genius!!!). The reading takes a bit more adjusting to. My English prof spelled it out best when he stated "My job is to give you the ability to read difficult text, understand said text and then be able to write about the content in a logical and understandable manner. And you will not enjoy it."

>.>;

Well, can't say I wasn't warned. This week, the English class was short ten students who the prof quite blithlely stated, would not be expected back any time soon. There's blood in the water folks, start paddling for shore fast.

I'm learning that I need to focus more and be disciplined in my study habits. Not that this is any news to me, but after so long simply abstracting the idea of study, applying attention to it is proving difficult. But I like a challenge!

And the sharks are prowling. I never lack for incentive.

Ah well, have to head off to American History now (damn those American's are bastards.)

Where's my pillow... ]]> ~Jjnnyrr http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/9685604/ http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/9685604/ Fri, 11 Aug 2006 01:16:54 PDT
Yes, let the rain of hypocrisy fall down on me... I have returned. Is it the new flashy style or neon sign.

Not really.

Mostly, I miss the format. And having somewhere for my art to go. Yar.

So I'm back and kicking around doing what I can to never expend effort. I know I could save some energy if I could just stop breathign automatically. Or maybe it would be more effort to concentrate on breathing....

Hmmm, that quandry feels like effort, I'll get to it later.

Not much for now, just stopping. A wave of uploads should be due soon.

>.>;;


Where's my pillow... ]]> ~Jjnnyrr http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/7943058/ http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/7943058/ Sun, 19 Feb 2006 12:22:15 PST
This would be because I actually read the Submission Agreement for DevArt, for the first time.

I regret waiting so long, and for trusting in the reassurance of others.

This isn't some bold proclamation that DA is trying to rip everyone off. This is me, making a decision, based on what I know.

What I know is that the Submission Agreement does not offer enough protection, in my opinion, to those who would post art here.

Now I know, I've heard from a few folks already, its stated that way so that DA can make thumbnails and distribute the art on the web site. I even understand that it would be only fair to let them advertise with the art posted here, for the privelege of having it posted.

But I find the wording too broad, lacking any limitation to using art posted here in those capacities.

It's not that I believe DA will do that. In fact, I would think them the biggest of fools to try. My problem, is that they want me to say its OK.

Or more simply: It's not that I think they will steal art, but that they can. And if you agree to the Submission Agreement, its not theft anyhow. And I won't say that.

Unfortunately, for me, DA is probably the best site around for posting art and viewing it on the net. So, I won't be completely gone from here either. But I certainly won't post more than scraps or very low-end art.

Good Luck all. ]]> ~Jjnnyrr http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/6792799/ http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/6792799/ Mon, 17 Oct 2005 14:36:01 PDT
20 things about me, eh?

1. I find answering questions about me difficult.

2. I'm always looking at things, figuring out how I would draw them.

3. If I never had another idea, I could still never finish everything that's bouncing around in my head right now.

4. My little bit of Carnie Wisdom: You don't run across the tightrope unless you're looking to fall.

5. I'm addicted to backpacks the way girls need shoes.

6. I love my hat.

7. I hate driving.

8. I have the tech savvy of drunk rock.

9. Dogs are better than cats, and having both is better then either one.

10. Toast is the best food group on the whole chart.

11. Bottlecap.

12. I dream of a day when all I do is draw.

13. I'm told I'm hopeless. I like to think of it as hopeful.

14. I relentlessly addicted to anime.

15. I think of myself as an anachronism. I find it a good thing.

16. Rainy days and hot cocoa with a lot time to kill is heaven.

17. Sleep is an underrated drug.

18. Sunshine!

19. Dei-chan!

20. I like answering questions about myself... 'cause I'm a narcissitic piker.


A little bit o' me via Twenty Questions.

]]> ~Jjnnyrr http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/6688368/ http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/6688368/ Wed, 05 Oct 2005 16:30:23 PDT Thinking of you.
I just cannot lie
And be true,
to the memories we made.
The lies we couldn't say,
As our hearts were breaking.

I've been much too proud,
to turn and face you.
I can only lie,
We are two,
And I have let you down,
With the things I tried to say,
As our hearts were breaking.

______________________________________

Not sure what's up with that, but its been running through my head all day. Wish I could share the beat too. Ah well.

Where's my pillow...

]]> ~Jjnnyrr http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/6677350/ http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/6677350/ Tue, 04 Oct 2005 11:32:55 PDT
Saw Serenity on Sunday. I will be seeing it again on Thursday and mebbe Friday too. Me loves its.

Serenity is just more of what I loved of Firefly. For those not in the know, Firefly was a short lived sci fi show on Fox brought to us by the genius that is Joss Whedon (ie, Buffy the Vampire Slayer & Angel).

The movie doesn't highlight the cast the way the show did (the flaw of the two hour format) but I can see it being enjoyable to any who watch it. That being said, I can only encourage those who like character driven shows to buy/rent/steal/mug/mortage home for the Firefly series on DVD. Once you watch it once, you'll want to watch 'em again and again. And then you'll want to watch Serenity a lot too. Mmmmmm.

I <3 Serenity. I could rave and rave and rave on about all of it (because I'm a fanboy and that's what we do) but its better to give a go for your goram selves.

Shiney.

Other good news, thanks to the kindly help from Miyuko142 and her tech guru b/f for helping me retrieve some of my lost stuffs. Lappy-that-was lives again!!! (sans the buggy parts).

And once I spend the quality time I need to with Lappy re-installing all the lost software (and games >.>;; ), I'll get back to posting me art stuffs.

Got lots to work on. A secret project (wahhhahaha), some fan art (as always) and some comicy stuff I'm trying out.

Busy busy busy.

Life is good.

Where's my pillow...

]]> ~Jjnnyrr http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/6634576/ http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/6634576/ Thu, 29 Sep 2005 13:59:42 PDT
First I'm sick. I've been sick pretty much since Sunday. Sore throat, fever, chills, runny nose, coughing, aches and pains. I've been going through all of those for the last five days. I don't want to be in my body anymore. And I miss sleep.

I am not in a good way.

On top of that, last week, Lappy had died. Yesterday I got Lappy back. In a flurry of excitement that briefly pushed aside my physical misery, I rushed home, plugged him and had a look-see.

And the hard drive had been wiped...

Four years of work, ideas, sketches and reference material... gone.

*sadness*

Seriously, as I scoured through the files, looking for any remnants of Lappy-that-was, a feeling of complete loss slowly settled in and got comfy with the misery my sickness had caused.

I don't even remember everything that was on Lappy, but I know I had wanted to hold on to it. I periodically go through my reference material to... well reference it, and update it. And I browsed the ideas I had stored, along with tidbits I had copied from brainstorming chats with friends and family (ideas come from everywhere).

Now its all gone. The tech guy said he 'might' still have it. He didn't sound like he believed it.

So now, its all gone. I'm not sure I have some of the hard copies of some of my work, so those will be lost forever.

I feel empty right now. And sniffley.

I'm gonna cry myself to sleep now.

Where's my pillow...

]]> ~Jjnnyrr http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/6565447/ http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/6565447/ Wed, 21 Sep 2005 16:29:29 PDT
Bah, I say!

Lappy has died yet again. His dessicated, silicon corpse has once again been conveyed to the Lab of Dark Arts for ressurrection. In the meantime, I'm screwed. Except maybe, for whatever 'net time I can scavange from work.

I'm just hoping I don't lose any file of pics I'm working on.

Yar.

Lappy wasn't doing so hot prior to this though, and I had sent out my first three comic pages for Stranger in a Strange Land for assembly. Helne has graciously, added them to her already overburdened schedule. Let's give a great big /cheer for crazy people.

Got a few 'promo' pics set aside for meh comic as well, but alas, coloring them has been delayed. Still, I'm enjoying a sense of focus and I'm trying to run with it as long as I can until some- oooohh!! Shiney!!

I also made a pic I had hoped to use as a wallpaper on Lappy based on the character designs by Helne in M.A.T.S.E.W. Helne was gonna color that too, but decided to use extortion against me before posting them.

>.>

<.<

/sigh

Regardless, I'm gonna be out some cash because of Lappy. I really need to start shopping around for a new comp. Something that doesn't crash after running Photoshop for a few minutes.

Oh well, still have my paper and pencils.

Where's my pillow...

]]> ~Jjnnyrr http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/6489493/ http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/6489493/ Mon, 12 Sep 2005 20:38:58 PDT
And a whole lotta nuthin' on paper. Bah! Bah, I say.

Still, this is better than Writer's Block.

And I've got a ton of sketch'd out poses to use for stuff.

Mostly for ... And Juliet. Dunno why, but she inspires dynamic poses. I like the funky angles.

I'm (sorta!) working in the first page of a comic for her.
Slowly, but surely. We'll see how that goes.

Stranger in a Strange Land (not the book!) is coming along nicely. Got two pages of comic made. Now if only Photoshop would be nice and stay alive for more than five minutes >.<; And I need to figure out how to make word bubbles.

I feel so ametuer. Ah well, I'll feel that way again. Best place to learn something is at the beginning, I say.

....

And leave the bodies where they can be found, so everyone knows you're serious.

Wrong Number is also close to being a completed Page 1.

As is Lean (the series!).

And as always, I seem to endlessly trudge away at those damn maps. My obssession with detail will kill me, I tell ya.

Also, all that other crap.

I'll probably be posting a lot of stuff in a couple of weeks. I'm a like the frat boy of art!! Binge posting on the weekends!!!


TOGA! TOGA! TOGA!

...

Moving right along...

Where's my pillow...

]]> ~Jjnnyrr http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/6435978/ http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/6435978/ Tue, 06 Sep 2005 19:53:04 PDT
Honestly I had planned to leave DA by now.

It never resolved the issue that was such a rucus a month ago. Like all things, wait long enough and people will forget.

/sigh

Technically, this should be my Good Bye. Alas, I have found myself riding the Wagon of Hypocrisy (that's my seat at the end on the left... fits the contours of my ass perfectly).

I'm still kinda on the fence about staying. I've eaten crow and swallowed my pride (almost choked to death too), and both are more palatable than staying...

and yet...

There is a degree of convenience here that I am hesitant to toss away. The ability to keep in touch with my few online friends here is a something I value. Apparently more than my personal convictions. So I will continue to post here, though maybe to a lesser degree. Maybe not.

I dunno... /sigh

In the meantime, Meh Que:

Overheard 0%
Blocking 0%
'Oh, he looks big' 8%
Kat 5%
Stranger in a Strange Land, Page 1 40%
Stranger in a Strange Land, Page 2 15%
Stranger in a Strange Land, Page 3 5%
Lean, Page 1 10%
... And Juliet, Page 1 20%
Wrong Number, Page 1 40%
Wrong Number, Page 2 5%
Jump 15%
Maps (so help me God I will finish these >< ) 70%
Llyrryllyn 20%
First Date 0%



/sigh. Ambitious, no?

Where's my pillow...

]]> ~Jjnnyrr http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/6350987/ http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/6350987/ Sun, 28 Aug 2005 13:03:03 PDT

I hate boxers. Yes, I know, many think they're are sexy, others like to look sexy in them. Alas... I am not one of those people.

I also hate one washing machine for 20 people. I doubt anyone will actually disagree that it sucks.

How do these two things combine?

First, some background. I (as in me) am a single male. I can not be expected to remember much of anything, say for example, regular wash days. Usually, I try to wash a load of clothing once a week just to make sure I have something to wear that I like, but I tend to have about two weeks work of workable combinations at a time.

Sometimes I can forget that a week has passed. >.>;; And then I find myself donning shirts that make me think "I still have this? I thought this went of fashion with mullets in 2000?"

Even then, I may not feel the urgency to a wash done. But luckily, I am smarter than myself. I have a system in place to tell me to wash clothes NOW.

Enter the boxers. When I get down to three pairs of boxers (which I don't ever remember actually getting), I know its time to wash clothes. The discomfort that I have wearing them is a wonderful cattle prod to my laziness to get things done. Normally, I never have to go past the first pair of boxers.

Enter the wahing machine. Apparently, I am not the only person with all-important, comfort-related clothes issues today. And now I'm forced to camp my washing machine to get my clothes washed. Arg....

I am most annoyed. Two days in boxers in intollerable.

/sigh

What does any of this have to do with art?

Nothing.

Time for a nap.

Where's my pillow...

]]> ~Jjnnyrr http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/6314378/ http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/6314378/ Wed, 24 Aug 2005 10:17:09 PDT
Busy drawing away. Getting closer and closer to having to know something about HTML as I finish my first few comic pages.

Gah... the pressure is on.


And now for the senseless rant portion of my day...

Tried Ballista yesterday in FFxi. Was really fun and exciting for the first fifteen minutes. At which time I realized that I had been dropped by my group. I asked what was going. And then I asked if I could be let back in.

Nothing. No response. Mebbe their busy. I wait a little, keep my head low and then ask again. Still no response. A few more minutes of that and I realize that I"m just not wanted.

So after being hunted down by the opposing team a few times, I crawl off to a remote corner of the map and nurse my battered ego.

Needless to say, I found this depressing. And possibly a bit prophetic. These are supposedly the people I will be attempting to group with in other in-game activities. I can only expect from this experience that there's only more of the same kind of treatment.

A very large part of me wants to sell off all my gear, give away the money to my friends and just move on. It wouldn't be so bad, but all my in-game friends passed me long ago. In that time, everthing that I had enjoyed has been stripped from me.

Probably wouldn't be so bad if I thought it wan't just me. But other ppl with my job have managed to pass me. Meh... Maybe its just a bad week... or month, or something.

Gonna curl up and die now.

Where's my pillow...

]]> ~Jjnnyrr http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/6102928/ http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/6102928/ Mon, 01 Aug 2005 15:38:16 PDT
Personally, I'm no longer going to participate in DA. If for one very real reason. Its stealing someone else's effort now.

This whole situation is the same as if I had my art stolen. I have invested money in my art. More importantly, I have invested time and effort. If someone had then taken my art, I would be enraged.

I can't say for certain if Jark is, but I imagine that he is.

In support (and to just move those things that are important to me, ie, my art) away from a situation I believe has become exploitive, I can longer post my work at this site in good conscience.

]]> ~Jjnnyrr http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/6076584/ http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/6076584/ Sat, 30 Jul 2005 10:34:30 PDT
I bought 12 anime for $50 from ADV ^.^

I have been watching most of it non-stop. Mmmm, anime....

Between that, I've been doing the usual, that is, going to work, drawing, reading, and plotting (a web comic >.> ).

Helne may have some project for me, to which I am very excited ^.^

I need to finish Dei-chan's fanart. ^.^;;

Trying to work on my Macabre & Horror pics (trying to make them Macabre & Horror instead of Hello Kitty!... oh wait...)

Lately, while listening to music, I've had a strange urge to make music videos with my comic characters. I'm not sure if this is possible with Flash or if there is a way to make animation faster than drawing it or... well, I think I have a lot more research I need to do. But I can visualize the animations to the music. Yar.

I recently posted a lot of line art, which is due for some photoshopping, so I have that to keep me busy as well. Wahahahahahha.

Sadly, I'm housing sitting for my lil sis right now, and my schedule has been remade to accamodate two cats (I just know the two furballs are loving it too >.>;; ). Well, I stills has meh trusty sketchbooks.

...

D00m to the the Feline Empire! I swear it! (off the desk you tail-less freak! No! No! - not the face! Aaaagghhhhh!!)

Where's the bandages...

]]> ~Jjnnyrr http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/5861312/ http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/5861312/ Wed, 06 Jul 2005 21:38:57 PDT
I've taken a sabbatical from gaming. Partly to prove to myself I can actually step away, even if just temporarily. Been finishing up a lot of line art so I can get some stuff finished in photoshop. I'm going through one of my rare manic creative fits. Lots of Mithra fanart, some manservant fanart, some creepy/scary stuff, and some original. I'm really quite pleased with my productivity, if not my results.

I'm also finally getting down to working on my web comic. I call it Stranger In A Strange Land. It wasn't until after the fact, that I learned this was in fact the title of a popular Sci Fi novel. I probably knew about it in passing, but this was kind of a surprise.

Ah well. Other than the title, neither have anything in common. Don't want to give too much away though. You'll just have to stay tuned.

Where's my pillow...

]]> ~Jjnnyrr http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/5647167/ http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/5647167/ Tue, 14 Jun 2005 14:13:19 PDT
For some reason, employers have not recognize my near-god-like greatness and snapped me up. >.>;;

Bah, I'll be thirty in 3 days and I'm not really happy about it. Still, I've mostly crawled out of my misery (GO AWAY GRAY SKIES!!) and do see this as an opportunity.

So, in keeping with this new advantage, I've been messing around a bit more with Photoshop. More or less, I'm getting better... I think.

Got stuff to work on that I've been putting off. And painful as it is, time to cut back on the video gaming. Much as I love it (ie, addicted to it >.<; ) its a time sink to which I no longer wish to invest as much time. So more images will be posted, and I'll be around FFxi less. Won't go away completely, but I won't be the constant pressence I've been in the past. Ah well, give and take is the name of the game.


Hmmm... Need to find a job still too...

Where's my pillow...

]]> ~Jjnnyrr http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/5391328/ http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/5391328/ Wed, 18 May 2005 11:06:25 PDT
Nothing really good seems to be coming from it. Had been entertaining the thought of returning to school, but I missed that, so yah... I got nuthing.

I hate my life right now...

]]> ~Jjnnyrr http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/5319857/ http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/5319857/ Tue, 10 May 2005 11:32:03 PDT
I digress.

Sort of. What started out as simple inspiration is growing into a full fledged project. Gotta love the random stuff. Anyhow, I've got a whole story idea progressing. Trying to see how I can work this project onto my already busy plate

Still, I'm liking it. Gah. No rest for the wicked I guess.

Been writing a lot more, trying to keep up with all the stories I have planned. Need to spend some quality time in Photoshop too. Too many unfinished pics sitting in folders.

*sigh*

Weather is turning nice (relatively) here in the Rainy Kingdom. I'm feeling an urge to step outside more. As much as the hermit lifestyle appeals to me (>.> , I'm kinda needing feel the air. And I need to figure out this strange, new land I've moved too. At least I dont' lack for stuff to do.

Working up the nerve to post a pic of myself. What's the hang up for me? My hideous hunchback? Nope, got that fixed. My bad hair? Like that EVER happens. The disfigurement from my horrible bicycle vs tree accident? Make-up hides most of that now >.>;.

Really it has to do with my online persona. I know I present myself in a certain way, which seems at odds with the person I see in the mirror every day. I'm still trying to determine how much overlap exists. Or I can't find shoes that match. meh.

Wahahahaha.

Back to work.

Where's my pillow...

]]> ~Jjnnyrr http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/5264285/ http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/5264285/ Wed, 04 May 2005 11:00:18 PDT
Plenty to do, no time to do it.

Still, I'm feeling good about it.

I'm working on a self portrait, of sorts right now (gotta love lunch time). I'm learning some interesting things. First, I've been drawing in a manga style for too long. Can't quite make my eyes right. Second, I can't quite seem to find the best, accurate self-representation of myself. I either exagerrate the flaws or idealize myself. Neither is what I'm aiming for. And third, I can't get a pose that is 'me'. Something relax and natural would be nice, but I end up lookining like a Calvin Klein wannabe with clothes on. Yar.

Still, its a good excercise... in pain tolerance. Probably be easier to just snap a picture, but I want this done first.

I am pleased with the hair. Nailed that down to almost perfect. But then, my hair is. >.>;


But will I ever post this? Methinks mebbe....

...

...

not.

Where's my pillow...

]]> ~Jjnnyrr http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/5119916/ http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/5119916/ Mon, 18 Apr 2005 11:01:39 PDT
I have not been updating in a while. I kinda slacked off on the art work.

Which isn't to say that I haven't been drawing, just that I've let my focus wander. It gets that way sometimes. I've used up quite a few pages sketching outs some ideas.

Now its time to get them done. My photoshopping is still gonna lag behind ^.^; but I may be able to con Helne into coloring some of it >.>;

Wahahahahaha, back to the drafting table!!!!

After work. Damn.

Where's my pillow...

]]> ~Jjnnyrr http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/4951600/ http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/4951600/ Wed, 30 Mar 2005 11:09:43 PST
Lots of niftyness to be had, though very little in the way of artistic progress. I got caught up in catching up with my family, which was nice.

Back to work now, though. Working on some stuffs. A little bit of the dark and derpessing, some cheerful stuff, maybe a questionable work or two and more of the fanart.

Not much else going on as I return to my predictable life. Well, there is a lot more sunlight nowadays (odd I'm told for the Rainy Kingdom). I may be taking some jaunts outside for some scenic pics. Too bad I let my 800 speed cameras run through the x-ray machine ><; Yar.

Oh well, I'll make do.

wahaa!!!

Where's my pillow...

]]> ~Jjnnyrr http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/4870422/ http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/4870422/ Mon, 21 Mar 2005 09:07:02 PST
Its passed now (hopefully).

Got some more stuff started, have some pics finished, so I'll be needing to update my que a bit.

*Clockworks storyline 1%
*Stanger in a Strange Land storyline 5%
Rianaden & Zakkan 40%
Outsider 40%
Sisters 25%
Namir 5%
Vrr and Vlad 10%
First Fall 30%
Angelfire 85%
Untitled #2 80%
Castellan 75%
The Wall 70%
Outfit 65%
Corner glance 60%
Above You 55%
Muse 50%
Dressed Up 50%
Living Fire 50%
Maps 45%
Dei, The Dragoon 45%
Bus Stop 15% & 20%
Gears & Cogs 15%
Juliet 10%
Francis and Kitsune 0%
Dyn Maginot 0%
Battlegod 0%

Ignore the percentage thingy. The projects near the top are closer to be completed ^^.

At least until I see something...

...

oooohhhh - shiney!!!

*runs off*

]]> ~Jjnnyrr http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/4827682/ http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/4827682/ Wed, 16 Mar 2005 11:12:54 PST
He touched her cheek lovingly. Never again would anything he made be like this. Nothing is like the first. It was something He had told him. Now he understood.

Gently, he bent down and kissed her lips.

He breathed life into her

Fires ignited, crystals charged, and gears started spinning. She opened her eyes.

"Hello," he said.

"Hello..." her voice revebereated from her metal throat, "Who are you? Who am I? What am I doing here?"

The man smiled sadly. "The first question is easy: I am your Father. The remaining questions, I fear you will have to learn without me."

She looked at him with a confused expression, "Father? I... am your daughter?"

"Yes," he brushed her cheek fondly, "my very first."

"But you will not be with me?"

"No. I cannot. But," he took her by the arm and led her to the edge, "I can give you life and world to be in."

She looked out at the land spread out before her, hues of green and blue, puffy white clouds lazily coasting across the sky. A bird winging its way through the air, called out melodically, greeting a new day.

Her first day.

"Father, what am I to do?"

"You ask such profound questions for one so young," he smiled at her again, now with some pride, "I doubt He had such quick thinking firstborn. You will do what you can, my child. Your life is yours."

"I'm scared, Father. I don't know what to do."

He took her in his arms, holding her in an embrace of comfort, "I know my child. Know that I will always love you."

He kissed softly again on the lips, he savored the metalic taste, making sure the memory would be there forever.

And he pushed her off the edge.

The look of betrayal, hurt and fear erased the memory of the kiss instantly.

And she was out of sight.

"You love her?" He asked as He stepped forward, "another lie?"

"Don't you have a world to watch?" he asked, his voice cracking.

"Answer my question, my once-favored."

"No. It was not a lie. It was her first truth. She deserved that much."

"Not part of our wager, but I can't fault even you for an act of kindness."

"Thank you," he replied with a strained voice, "now, leave me. I tire of your games."

As He started to walk away, He said, "now you too, have a world to watch. I hope your heart does not become as broken as mine," and he was gone.

The Devil thought about God's parting words, fearing he would understand them far more than he would care to in the days to come.

]]> ~Jjnnyrr http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/4811115/ http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/4811115/ Mon, 14 Mar 2005 13:42:54 PST
I'm sick and most unhappy. Just snacking away on what passes for lunch (pretzels and a chocolate chip cookie) and then a wave of nasuea hits me. I mean, seriously, like an invisible sucker punch. I was certain I was gonna yarf right at me desk, but I managed a sedately rushed pace to something flushable.

Now I'm still at work, praying I can leave soon, knowing I won't, and weighing my odds on having to use the basket beside me...

That un-niftiness aside, I've been busy with art (as always) and I've got a few completed now. Won't say which ones, 'cause the surprise is half the fun. I'll probably post 'em tonight before a'gaming I go.

Not much else to say other than "Killl me now!!!"

ugh....

Where's my pillow... oh wait!! not here!!! ><

]]> ~Jjnnyrr http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/4786942/ http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/4786942/ Sat, 12 Mar 2005 10:44:45 PST
On the bright side, its proof that I'm busy .

Teh que (such as it is):

Clockwork Demon 90%
I Am Evil 90%
Gears & Cogs 15%
Dressed Up 50%
Bus Stop 10%
Living Fire 50%
Angelfire 85%
Dei, The Dragoon 45%
Outfit 65%
Castellan 75%
The Wall 70%
Juliet 10%
Dyn Maginot 0%
Namir 0%
Above You 55%


Meh, its a start. Its by no means complete, but its what I can remember at the moment.

*whimper*

Edit:

Corner glance 60%
Untitled #2 80%
Acton Alone 90%
Francis and Kitsune 0%
Battlegod 0%
Maps 45%

More to be added later


*twitch*

]]> ~Jjnnyrr http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/4711727/ http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/4711727/ Wed, 02 Mar 2005 14:08:03 PST < )

Work was, well, not for me yesterday, so I stayed home . Did a lot of nothing with the odd errand here or there. I have four pics I've already posted in photoshop undergoing... upgrades. We'll see how they turn out.

Still have that macabre feeling lingering about, probably because of all the gray and the concrete. There's a sorta "Jack the Ripper" feel to the city right now, all the quiet crowds. I really need to shell out for a disposable camera and just start taking random pics of the city. I'll need some scenery reference material anyhow for my (still unprepared for) web comic. Gots to love the optimism.

I may be adding to my scraps soon thoough, as it seems underutilized and I have plenty of crap that fits into that category. Bwahahahahah!!!.

Everyone that can use photoshop is giving me a complex. Sure color is wiz-bang and all, but I love the grayscale. Maybe because I'm most comfortable with it (damn near 27 years ). More to do with how I love trying to make sublte tonal shifts with a pencil. I know its not the only way to achieve the effect of depth on a page, but its my favorite. Still, I need to learn photoshop. Some of my pics (particularly the line art) was intendend for color. Ah well, back to the drawing board.

I've had this strange urge to climb up onto the roof and stare at the sky. During the day, just watch the clouds drift by looking for shapes in puffy, white blobs. I saw Michaelangelo in the clouds once... well, part of the Sistine Chapel, where God brings life into Man. Two hands in the sky, barely touching. Good stuff.

At night, look into vast empty, and then change my point of view and make the night sky a veil with light spilling through. Or (if light pollution is down), watch for the streamers of cosmic gas, dust, whatever, as they trail out in some massive river. Sometimes (and I'm not too sure on this), I think I can seen the arm of the spiral we're on. Kinda comforting.

And now that I've rambled successfully, I'd better start doing my job. . Or take a nap.

Where's my pillow...

]]> ~Jjnnyrr http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/4693085/ http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/4693085/ Mon, 28 Feb 2005 13:13:48 PST
Have a pic I'm working on called Gear and Cogs, sorta from the Clockwork Angel theme. Definitely something of a macabre image (its worse in my mind, but for some reason the act of drawing cheers me up enough to dilute it ). Clockwork Demon is twisting along nicely as well.

Also have a picture called Awkward Moment (flying tackle gone awry, heheh... ok you had to be there), but its just not working (like so much of what I've got right now) so I may not post it.

A slightly more cheerful project is Dei - Dragoon (always perks me up) which is nice dynamic pose of my favorite Mithra DRG (other than me ). I just love dynamic poses, and I'm particulary fond of this one, which took a few tries to find. Fun Fun.

There's some random stuff floating around too, all of jockeying for my attention for completion. And there's all the photoshopping I have to do as well. Well at least I'm not bored.

Crap. I should be working.

Where's my pillow...

]]> ~Jjnnyrr http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/4597502/ http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/4597502/ Wed, 16 Feb 2005 11:27:17 PST
I just gotta let that go.

So, in the meantime, I really just focus on drawing. I've had a few good ideas, and I think there are some more involved projects I need to focus on. Most of my pictures have been things that are quick to put on paper, really intended for scanning and Photoshop. But since that's a no-go at the momennt, time to kinda get back to my roots

My idea for a Self Portrait is taking on a bit more clarity and intent. Now I have to find a camera I feel comfortable standing in front. Maybe I should get may nails done? Too much? Yah, you're right. Despite that, I'm feeling good 'bout this idea. Haven't really tested my fundamental skills in a while, so this is gonna be good.

Trying to remain somewhat optimistic after yesterday, alas, I'm only really feeling good 'bout the extra sleep I got (mmmm, nice). Still, today doesn't suck. Clear sky, yummy granola, some Dasani by my comp, I really don't have a reason to complain (but I'll try!! ).

Ah well. Back to the grind.

Where's my pillow...

]]> ~Jjnnyrr http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/4589401/ http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/4589401/ Tue, 15 Feb 2005 13:07:54 PST
Not 'give up' really, but what's really left? I have quite a nice set of pics I want to add, but I keep tossing money into the gaping maw of computer repair.

And the bloody pikers don't fix it!!! ><

It cost my half a work week's pay to get Lappy fixed and... NOTHING!!! It still doesn't work. Its just so damn depressing. I feel like my effort is being wasted. I could easily have made better use of that money, oh I don't know - feeding myself!!

And they kept my laptop's carry case!!! Fething pikers kept the case!!! Take my money, but rob of my possessions too?! I've been to this place three times and I'm still not happy with what I'm getting back. It just such a let down.

I'm eager to post my pics, but it seems I can't get that far along. Seriously, what does it take to find an honest repair outfit these days. I'm tired of being screwed up the wallet and I can't afford it to boot.

yar.

Where's my pillow...

]]> ~Jjnnyrr http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/4554146/ http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/4554146/ Fri, 11 Feb 2005 12:58:19 PST
Lots going on in my head at the moment.

Shear joy at finally getting paid a day in advance. Lappy goes in for repair, and I will hopefully be Photoshopping away in a few days.

I'm also contemplating a self-portrait, for a change of pace from my catgirl obsession of late. I've got a couple ideas in play, but the final angle is still up for debate. Also not sure for the mood I'd be aiming for, but 'regular' seems like my best bet. (I hate being one of those broody types )

Strangeness in net-land abounds, but can't say that's unexpected. My confusion at the moment is a good thing though, as it leads me to paper and a desire to make... something.

Ah, how much is your sanity worth?

Mine seems to be selling cheap these days. Blarg... Stuff on my mind. I'm so confused.

And none of that makes, does it? Well that's how I feel


Ah well, back to work.

Where's my pillow...

]]> ~Jjnnyrr http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/4518955/ http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/4518955/ Mon, 07 Feb 2005 08:57:27 PST
Which is the kinda the mood I'm in. Happy for no reason (the best kind of Happy, in my opinion)

Yah, I'm still twigged 'bout the whole Valentines thing, but after a weekend of video games and Sunday morning coffee, I have it all back in perspective.

I'm reading a funny book (as noted in the Title box of this entry), and its giving me a yen to travel a bit. I'm not really one to travel much, but when I do, I like to see the new things there (wherever 'there' is). The sort of 'real person' perpective of the book adds an element of surreal, since I have only the vaguest notions of what its like to live in NYC (or anywhere east of the Rockies). But its humorous and I can't stop laughing. Always a good thing.

I found a nice burst of creative energy (playing slow-to-lvl jobs is great for this ). Got a few pics done, a few closer to done, and a few more ideas to work on.

Unfortunately, Lappy is taking a turn for the worse. Damn viruses. Programs keep locking up, so now I can't even use Photoshop. Yar.

And I'm still desperately in dire need of cash. Thank god I have a penchant for holding onto to change. Vending machine goodness until Friday. Not the most desired cuisine, but it'll keep me going. Mmmm, granola.

And through all of that, I'm feeling pretty good. A blue sky overhead (through a tiny skylight) and pencil and paper in hand. I'm pretty much set .

What more could a guy ask for?

*hides Helne's shoes in his closet*

>.>
<.<

Work again.

Where's my pillow...

]]> ~Jjnnyrr http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/4494770/ http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/4494770/ Fri, 04 Feb 2005 09:04:37 PST
Yar.

I would be lying if I didn't admit that this is definitely a downer for me. The Roommate is happy with 'First Date Joy' of a meeting that should, at the very least, carry past 2/14 in that hazy bliss of a flawless first impression.

I on the other hand... Hmmm. To be fair, I don't try. But I'm somewhat disenchanted all the same. And annoyed. There is this very strong belief that we (and by extension, I) need someone to complete us. I'm not buying it. I don't want to 'need' anyone. I would like someone who enjoys being around me and vice versa. But I don't want to have someone dependent on me to keep them happy/sane/complete.

I may want/desire/lust/crave a person, but I know I will never need them. Should I fall for such a (mythical) creature, and they were to leave me, yes, like anyone else, I would be devestated. I'd cry. I'd mope. I'd be despondent.

I'd get over it. Eventually.

I guess I'm pissed at the rest of the world for trying to pair me off like I'm in a breeding kennel. And they try to sweeten this foul drink with 'You'll be happy'.

Blarg!!!! ><

Now I'm just ranting and I had planned to say something 'bout drawing and .... meh.

Damn. Work.

Where's my pillow...

]]> ~Jjnnyrr http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/4478934/ http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/4478934/ Wed, 02 Feb 2005 11:05:40 PST
Damnit!! The sun is out, the clouds are away and I'm here. Really only mildly annoyed, but its the principal of the matter. God owes me a sunny day and pays it back while I'm indoors? He's a smarmy piker, that's for sure.

Well life seems to be following its usual track. Nothing exciting is happening. I slept for 8 hours and I feel good. Got my latte' and croissant before work, bus showed up with minimal wait. I really have to look for stuff to complain about.

I've got way too many Mithra pics in que, so I'm thinking I need to mix it up a bit. But all I have are Mithra pic ideas. Yar. I"m trying to focus more on my web comic idea, just to keep it going. I will put it down and let it linger if I don't remained focused, and I really have faith that I have good story to tell. (I'm hoping that its Professional Pride and not Hubris that makes me feel this way )

Hmmm. I need to watch more anime too. I get plenty of nifty ideas form anime and I've been negecting that aspect of my life (some of you may be shocked to learn I have not view'd an anime episode of anything in two weeks O.O) I did find time to watch Ghost in the Shell: Innocence, which is just damn awesome. I have two volumes of Chrono Crusade and Kiddy Grade to I need to view too. I'm thinking its time to revisit Evangelion again too.

Aaaaaaggggghhhh!@! - so much to watch

Yar.

I also order'd 11X14 canvas prints of Helne's uberlicious renditions of my Street Samurai and Clockwork Angel pics. Those are surprisingly not cheap...

I may have to start cooking again, as its cheaper than take-out. Ah well, I've had a craving for grilled cheese for a while. Time to feed it, so to speak.

Hmmm, lunch is almost over. Time to get back to work.

Where's my pillow...

]]> ~Jjnnyrr http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/4419287/ http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/4419287/ Wed, 26 Jan 2005 11:02:58 PST
]]> ~Jjnnyrr http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/4368536/ http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/4368536/ Thu, 20 Jan 2005 12:24:50 PST <. There were certainly people more deserving of keeping their jobs than me, and I have a bad taste at the thought of it. Its left in something of a foul mood and all my more 'cheerful' pics are shelved until I sort through this. Its a feeling that co-exists with the guilt I feel when I can't spare some change for the homeless I pass on the street. Sometimes I hate the world around me, because it doens't care.

Grrr.

Homelessness is one of those problems that keeps getting shuffled off as 'Someone elses problem'. Like so many other problems.

The Tsunami Relief I see such an outpouring for is a tragedy, not simply for the suffering there, but that the help and goodwill being devoted to the cause turns a blind eye to what we have here.

I'll buy something to eat for some guy asking for change for just a cup of coffee sometimes. I dunno, I guess I'm just feeling depressed, scared, and a bit too poor to really enjoy things right now.

And yes, I'm standing high on my soapbox, which is balance precariously on my hypocrisy, since I plan to go home, play video games and eat pizza. But it seems as most people don't even make the step towards aknowledging problems around them.


(God I hope the video games and pizza cheer me up...)

]]> ~Jjnnyrr http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/4343499/ http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/4343499/ Mon, 17 Jan 2005 14:01:06 PST
This week, for the first time since aquiring my job in November, I will only work 40 hours.

/tears of joy.

And as such, I must devote more time to making stuff. Or sleeping. I'll probably go for a liberal mix of both. Hmmm, there's also some anime I just got I still haven't watched...

Yay. I have options other than cooking microwave food and sleeping!!!

In more tragic news, Lappy has been virus'd and my TV smells of burned silicon and plactic and won't turn on...

Disturbing. So I have a few errands to run after work, but yay!! - I have the time now. Carrying the TV onto the bus will be... interesting, but all for a good cause. Me .

Other than that, I just plan to go on a crazy drawing spree until my hand locks up into a gnarled claw only fit for uprooting grubs from loose soil. Or I pass out from exhaustion. One of the two.

Busy busy busy, and happy to be so.


Where's my pillow...

]]> ~Jjnnyrr http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/4309802/ http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/4309802/ Thu, 13 Jan 2005 11:16:56 PST
The picture I'm planning to scan in later today (simply Untitled 1) is one of those rare occurances. Honestly, not some of my best work, but some of the most intense. For the size of the picture, it took me about two weeks to complete.

Tragically, the original in now in the very pretty hands of a girl who's name I've forgotten. I'm such a sucker for a pretty face.

Ah well. She had a nice smile too.

*melts*

But the picture includes a random pattern I implement often into other pictures (on a smaller scale) which I have taken to considering 'my' style/technique/what-have-you. I've never been sure what to make of it, but other than the focus and intensity that goes into creating the pattern is absolutely joyous/painful. I have a few other pics that I've started in the pattern, but I have yet to complete them, though one is close. The design is fun, and its probably one of the few things I do as artist I don't self-critique the way we all do when we make someting.

I suspect that is the reason I keep going back to the Pattern even though I never complete a picture - to feel that sense of satisfaction, complete and unfetterred, in something of my own creation. Its a feeling artists don't get to enjoy too often, as we all see the little mistakes in a project that mis-align it with what we had initially envisioned.

I think it keeps me sane. Keeps me trying.

And I'm kinda rambling, and this post won't make sense until later tonight when I scan in Untitled 1, but I just wanted to get these words down.

Probably just to hear myself think.

Where's my pillow...

]]> ~Jjnnyrr http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/4293576/ http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/4293576/ Tue, 11 Jan 2005 11:03:27 PST
ah well.

Sprung up a few more ideas for pics. They grow like weeds, I tell ya. As it is, I"ll need an extra lifetime to finish what I've got. Bah.

Clockwork Demon is clearly an sequal pic, and Watcher will be following along a similar theme. I Don't Love You Anymore is just something to indulge my sense of melancholy. Given the time it takes me to get just one picture done, I'm almost hesitant to admit I still have ideas. It will eventually come down to a 'Pick and Choose' moment, where something gets left by the wayside. Ah well, such is an aritsts life, I imagine.

Im doing final touch ups on Wanderers (even though it never actually looks complete) and Angelfire is just giving me fits as I keep telling myself its done, but then again, maybe it isn't.

Its like this when I order Chinese food too ><.

Back to earning a paycheck.

Where's my pillow...

]]> ~Jjnnyrr http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/4285233/ http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/4285233/ Mon, 10 Jan 2005 11:07:56 PST
Last night, I went out with my roommate and saw Closer. A well made movie, but I'm glad I didn't bring a date (though some would like to imply otherwise *looks at Helne*). Very sad, depressing, and you can tell it was adapted from a play. All in all, though, it pulled me and I found the characters people I could empathize with. It did sort of highlight how alone I am in the Rainy Kingdom. That was mildly depressing, but I've been living in my own skin long enough to know that alone is never quite what it seems, just have to look around a bit.

Ah well.

I did have some nice ideas for some pics thanks to the movie too. Probably a departure from what I usually do. That can be good too. Sketching out some stuff right now. As soon as I finish a couple pics I really want to finish, I'm gonna try this.

Hmm, seems I ought to work a bit.

Where's my pillow...

]]> ~Jjnnyrr http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/4265098/ http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/4265098/ Fri, 07 Jan 2005 20:19:32 PST

(they should let me go home, hehe)

I get home, Lappy is waiting and I order Chinese (still waiting for the food). All is going well. I'm loving the pics I just posted (Clockwork Angel and Helne the Bard). Got my bills paid, sleep is soon (or not, still have yet to log onto FFXI tonight). I'm just feeling good.

If it snows tomorrow, I'll be able to skip out on work too. Pray for snow.

]]> ~Jjnnyrr http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/4245371/ http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/4245371/ Wed, 05 Jan 2005 11:07:53 PST
And I paid the good man and brought Lappy home. A small memory upgrade for my little zombie and all is good. Just need to get the drivers for the scanner re-installed again and I can post more pics.

Don't think I've been slacking off either. I have, I just don't wantcha thinking it. But I have managed to keep up with a few pics regardless of my nature. Wanderers and Angelfire are done, as is Helne the Bard. I've also been working on a few new pics. One even inspired by Helne (fickle Muse that she is). Clockwork Angel will be available for viewing in line art form in 'bout a week and I'll be making another feeble attempt at Photoshopping it myself. Also several mithra pics and I just started a projected that is sure to test the limits of my sanity (so far, nameless).

All this creative energy has me excited and its taking all my willpower to even pretend I'm working instead of drawing .

So, yay for the busy ^^


Where's my pillow...

]]> ~Jjnnyrr http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/4228430/ http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/4228430/ Mon, 03 Jan 2005 11:05:26 PST
Big thanks to Helne, she did awsome work for some line art I sent her. You keep an eye on her, she'll be kickin' our arses soon enough. This of course, means I'll be sending her more stuff as time goes by. Bwahahahahahahaaa-coughcoughcough.. gasp. Er... well anyhow.

Christmas brought me a copy of HTML for Dummies (yay me!!) and now I must set about the learning of technology so I can make my own web-comicy goodness. It all looks so daunting and I lack so much tech savvy. Must focus.

Ah crap ><; the books at home.

In other news of goodness, Lappy is undergoing several Rites of Necromancy (that none of my friends told me about <.< ; ) and will hopefully return to realms of undead servitude in the near future. And I can post stuff again.

Score!!

That's all for now

Where's my pillow...

]]> ~Jjnnyrr http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/4154066/ http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/4154066/ Sat, 25 Dec 2004 12:02:00 PST
But I get to spend it with family this year (people I cherish greatly) and am very happy. A walk in the rain is merely icing on my festive mood. Happy, happy, happy.

Usually this time of year gets me down, but today is feeling too damn good. Gray skies be damned.

I am loving the world today. Merry Christmas to all my friends. Thanks for putting up with my 'me-ness'. I appreciate it, even though I brush it off with non-chalance.

Merry Christmas, and watch those reindeer.

]]> ~Jjnnyrr http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/4126611/ http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/4126611/ Wed, 22 Dec 2004 10:17:36 PST
I kinda of started making a song... really more of it making itself, just renting space in my head it seems. Thought I post the chorus. Needs verses now. Probably won't be gone until its done.

Here goes..

And I've got you on my mind,
Can't seem to clear the signs away.
Just another day,
Without you.

And I'm walking the streets alone,
Can't seem to find my way home today
Just have to say
I miss you.


Not sure exactly where that's coming from, music isn't my forte. Well, I have a suspicion, but I have to keep some of my secrets. Hehehe.

In other craptacular news, my comp (Lappy) has officially died. Grrr. Its gonna cost me to get it fixed. I'm also looking into getting a decent comp for doing digital work. Any suggestions of where and what to buy would be welcome. I'm planning for the purchase in mid-January, so I have time to plan my purchase.

Wahaa!!! ]]> ~Jjnnyrr http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/4118667/ http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/4118667/ Tue, 21 Dec 2004 11:22:44 PST
I'm tired. I was tired yesterday too. Might explain a bit. I have two pictures I want to finish before the day is out, I doubt either will be more than glanced at though.

If I wasn't working six days a week, maybe... Just no time it seems. I hate that. More than anything else, not having time for my pursuits aggravates me. I want to draw!! And I don't feel like drawing!! Grrr.

Been gray three days in a row here and its starting to bleed into everything around me. Everything is losing color, gaining tone. Like switching to grayscale. The edges are blurring, or that's the sleep-dep.

Just want to wake up. Or sleep.

Two more days and I have a real weekend. Time to 'decompress' as my roommate puts it. Time to catch up. I'm not making sense.

Yar.

There's always tomorrow. ]]> ~Jjnnyrr http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/4111592/ http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/4111592/ Mon, 20 Dec 2004 14:01:36 PST ~Jjnnyrr http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/4110357/ http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/4110357/ Mon, 20 Dec 2004 11:25:03 PST ~Jjnnyrr http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/4094380/ http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/4094380/ Sat, 18 Dec 2004 10:04:41 PST
Guess I should offer a bit of the moment. I listen to music on my MP3 player. Its the same order every time, so everyday after work, I start my freedom with Time's Scar, the theme music to Chrono Cross (a damn fine game).

This is where the idea shows up. FFXI is usually on my mind at some point during the day, and the music and my random game musings collided.

I thought up a short anime-type film set to the music. I have a brief outline of what happens. a group of adventurers around a camp fire in the woods (probably Ronfure or Jugner). The group is Helne, Dei, Jakorian, Action, Jigo (because we need a Taru ) and Vrrllyrr. The bard (Dei) starts singing, everyone else listen. A spark spirals up into the night, picture goes dark, spark becomes and Orc's red eyes.

The group is ambushed while they sleep by goblins. Its a ruse, straw under blankets. The adventurers are running for their lives. Its a running battle, Goblins everywhere. Acton (a mage) falls first, Goblins swarming him. He tells his friends to go on. His eyes flare. As the group runs, there's and explosion, backlighting the trees.

More goblins. The adventurers keep fighting. One by one, they are brought down. Helne (the healer) watches as her friends are defeated in front of her. She unleashes a powerful healing magic, saving her friends, but the Goblins swarm her. Her friends move to help.

A large orc steps forward and puts a blade to Helne's throat. Her friends stop and look on helplessly.

Acton's eyes flare and narrow in a wicked smile. He's standing behind the Orc, flames dancing along his fingertips. Flare of light behind Helne and the Orc drops.

The adventurers gather together and fight off the last of the Goblins. Dawn approaches, and the group is victorious.

Music ends. Some kind of FFXI logo... blah, blah, blah..

Yeah, its campy as hell, but its been bounceing inside my skull for 24 hours, thought I'd put it down somewhere.

Nifty. ]]> ~Jjnnyrr http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/4087467/ http://Jjnnyrr.deviantart.com/journal/4087467/ Fri, 17 Dec 2004 10:55:56 PST ).

Can't say much is happening at the moment. I'm just stealing moments at work to browse the net.

I see a lot of talent around here. Kinda intimidating. I'll get use to it.

Making a Helne the Bard pic and have a few more I need to scan in (as soon as my bloody comp is working again... grrr).

Crap... I should be drawing right now. ]]> ~Jjnnyrr