http://search.deviantart.com/?q=by:Keyboard-Failure-X&section=today deviantART RSS for by:Keyboard-Failure-X en-us Copyright 2009, deviantART.com Fri, 18 Dec 2009 23:28:16 PST deviantART.com http://blogs.law.harvard.edu/tech/rss http://s.deviantart.com/minish/widgets/apple-touch-icon-precomposed.png http://Keyboard-Failure-X.deviantart.com/journal/23390738/ http://Keyboard-Failure-X.deviantart.com/journal/23390738/ Tue, 24 Feb 2009 21:58:48 PST I'm not really coming back to DA, but I wanted to drop clue here about Social Vibe [link].
Or join through the link in my myspace to help out even more! [link]
It's a great new social-networking site that focuses on using advertising to raise money for good causes.
Go ahead and check it out for yourself and please add me as a friend on there and help us all work to make the world
a better place, all just by being lazy internet bums like we already are!

]]> ~Keyboard-Failure-X http://Keyboard-Failure-X.deviantart.com/journal/10551146/ http://Keyboard-Failure-X.deviantart.com/journal/10551146/ Sun, 29 Oct 2006 17:11:00 PST
-End.

]]> ~Keyboard-Failure-X http://Keyboard-Failure-X.deviantart.com/journal/10051399/ http://Keyboard-Failure-X.deviantart.com/journal/10051399/ Tue, 12 Sep 2006 15:26:21 PDT
I'm preparing some really cool packages to send up to my Jennifer so her physical mailbox won't be empty. Some of it will be halloween decorations. I can't wait to get up to visit there, especially for Halloween. Salem+Halloween= Awesome, does it not? ]]> ~Keyboard-Failure-X http://Keyboard-Failure-X.deviantart.com/journal/9519198/ http://Keyboard-Failure-X.deviantart.com/journal/9519198/ Fri, 28 Jul 2006 05:36:36 PDT He and I are so similar that It must be another one of those cosmic coincidences.
I keep asking why I am where I am, but I think that it's probably just to have met
the people here that I have and learn what I can from them, and maybe to leave
them with a lesson or two as well.

Some of you casual Deviants may be wondering why I'm posting this. Really
I ignore the fact that this journal is meant to record artistic process. A person
is the sum of his experiences, and life in this way, from the beginning to the end,
is really an artistic process. Please know that there are certain people who I
am writing this for, whom I simply could not tell this to in person, people I considered
Never telling. In fact, if you don't know me in person, or regularly speak to me
please skip the next paragraph, and instead take this joke:how do crazy people
get through the forest? ON PSYCHOPATHS!!"

What he knows is that I am emotional. What he doesn't know is just how much
worse I used to be. Of all the range of human emotion, Guilt has been what I've felt
the most often, in the most extreme. I was always a well behaved child, and the
thought of doing anything wrong got to me. Deep down. Some people tell me/think
that I've never been depressed, or that I don't have problems because I don't
take meds, or I don't see any therapists. But I'll tell them they're wrong. Lately I've
been fine, but prevously my highs have been high and my lows have been low.
There have been times in my life when guilt and regret had turned to self-loathing
and I would make the choice to replace mental anquish with physical pain.
I think now and go back to reread one of my poems. Perhaps he already knew this
and just never lead on that he did. That would be his sort of thing to do. (And it bothers me
that a deviant thought that poem was written from my imagination.) If I didn't respect him
I wouldn't feel so bad for thinking I might have hurt him. When a grown man with eyes wide
and hands shaking is baring his soul to people he cares for, It's immense to think you've
wronged someone who is so vulnerable at the time.

Until the past few days I was having the best month I've had in a long, long time.
While Jen remained the shyer of the two of us the weekend I met her, I knew well
enough that she was nothing short of the sweetest kindest girl I've ever known.
What I can't get over, and it's been weeks, is that we may have never met, or
bothered to spend the time with eachother if it hadn't been for our choice in
costumes at Connecticon. While the distance thing is tough, it keeps me on track
with other things that are equally as important to me, like school.
I'm quite seriously considering a school in the Boston area after this.
Everyone I talk to about it seems to really like the city, and as much as
I hate cities, I think living and learning just outside of it would be a lot of fun.
It gets me a school I probably won't hate, one that is not full of as much corporate
Bull Shit as this one. It gets me away from parents. It gets me away from people
I don't want to see anymore, yet at the same time both further from and closer to
people who mean the world to me.

I feel like I'm ten paces behind in a huge race, but my body doesn't have enough
energy to push any further. As refreshing as it is to get help, Something about my
bullheaded independence gets in the way. I want people to cheer for me, and not
give me a push. I couldn't do this without fans.

Lately sleep has not come easy to me. Dreams are more tiring than real life.
They seem to fortell what is to come in the day ahead. I had a good one last night.
I need Caffeine. But over all, It doesn't get much better. ]]> ~Keyboard-Failure-X http://Keyboard-Failure-X.deviantart.com/journal/9332577/ http://Keyboard-Failure-X.deviantart.com/journal/9332577/ Mon, 10 Jul 2006 12:50:15 PDT
There is so much to say here:

This year I did a cosplay of Cloud Strife (Advent Children outfit), and apparently I did a great job. (I even had someone mistake my real hair for a great wig)

I'll link some pictures, or maybe post them on here as scraps later, I really just want to get all the writing out of the way first.

The moment I got even close to the registration table, a man told me there was an incredible Aeris upstairs and he simply HAD to have a picture of us both. He had no idea how incredible she really was. Aeris (Jen) found me almost immediately, and since I didn't have 1 gil to spend on one of her flowers, she gave one to me instead. I ended up spending the entire weekend with her. It must have taken us more than 10 minutes to get accross the floor to the gaming room because of all the picture requests. I may as well take the time to brag here. A large degree of it could have been how awesome Jen looked as Aeris, but over the course of the three days we must have totalled nearly 150 picture requests, and surely many more were taken when we posed with Sephiroth (Pete) and participated in the Cosplay Dating game.

On top of that I had a lot of younger teenage girls introduce me to "The Cloud Song" which I didn't know existed until friday afternoon. I also must note that being simultaneously glomped by a dozen screaming girls is absolutely horrifying.

Back to the Dating Game:
It was the first time ConnCon had the cosplay dating game, and it could have been run a bit better. Aeris and I didn't exactly know what we were getting into when we agreed to participated, but the guy seemed to really want us to. The man hosting the show and his posse did an AWFUL job Timing the thing, and I ran out of scripted questions and had a pretty hard time coming up with more good questions, hopefully I nailed a couple of them. And all after that, they cut Aeris's stage time really short. = P

I really miss her. The more I got to know her, the more she fascinated me, and the more I found we had in common, and the more I resented the fact that she lives a state away.
I realize this has been one of my longest journals I've EVER written, and I appologize for even putting it here for you to read, but ConnCon was really amazing, and I still have more stories about it that I want to tell. So let's make this last one really short. When Aeris locks her keys in the car, Reno comes to the rescue. ]]> ~Keyboard-Failure-X http://Keyboard-Failure-X.deviantart.com/journal/9117951/ http://Keyboard-Failure-X.deviantart.com/journal/9117951/ Mon, 19 Jun 2006 17:00:01 PDT
This month has been a huge time for my favorite media, but due to some circumstances i'm only now getting around to it all.

the latest half life expansion is out and thanks to an overheating power supply and a wicked slow net connection i haven't played more than 5 minutes of it.

Deathnote 6 also came out on the 6th, but the bookstore i usually go to is run by idiots and i had to track it down elsewhere. only finally got to read it today. AMAZING.

AFI's new album... Thumbs up (except miss murder and the interview... i'm so tired of them both already)

And now to the personal stuff:

this past week has seemed so unreal to me. I actually missed a day of class. Which is a first since highschool. I feel I needed it though. I feel like all of a sudden I've lost/am losing all my friends. Not to say I don't appreciate my fellow deviants. I really do. I'm glad I can watch and anticipate your latest creations, but I'm finding just how few people I'm close to who I spend time with.

I may be moving early 07 to go live with my aunt and attend school in her area, so i suppose having a lot of close friends here would only make that harder on me.

Speaking of school, this is the final week of the semester, and despite the amount of work I have to to/should be doing right now, I don't feel very stressed out.

Nothing seems real to me now, and though I'm letting it pass me by like the breeze, it will probably hit me like a gale force wind once it has actually passed. Like a ton of bricks.

I'm also really looking forward to the possibility of getting a new job. I'm really getting tired of the greenhouse.

I don't even know what else there is that anyone would be interested in, anything I'd be interested in writing about...
I guess i'll just end it here.

Ja Mata

-Justin ]]> ~Keyboard-Failure-X http://Keyboard-Failure-X.deviantart.com/journal/8992263/ http://Keyboard-Failure-X.deviantart.com/journal/8992263/ Tue, 06 Jun 2006 18:49:42 PDT
see you all soon. ]]> ~Keyboard-Failure-X http://Keyboard-Failure-X.deviantart.com/journal/8937545/ http://Keyboard-Failure-X.deviantart.com/journal/8937545/ Thu, 01 Jun 2006 06:33:20 PDT
Kind of a stressful day where the office is concerned.

Class was a waste of time. I don't feel my understanding of hamlet as covered in 4 hours really makes a difference in my life.

I had a very enjoyable drive. Hartford is really a treasure trove of amazing scenery that you'd never expect. Did you know that the inventor of anaesthetics is buried there? That entire cemetery is really an awe inspiring location. I kinda wish I lived there. (living in a cemetery? I make myself laugh.)

I wish I had my camcorder with me. I saw a lot of things that would make a really awesome Depeche Mode music video. Too much to list here really. Yes, a car ride as a music video. The whole thing really made my day.


Also I ate Zushi for the first time. Even the alien.

Thank you. ]]> ~Keyboard-Failure-X http://Keyboard-Failure-X.deviantart.com/journal/8486733/ http://Keyboard-Failure-X.deviantart.com/journal/8486733/ Sun, 16 Apr 2006 08:12:41 PDT I have hated most of this past week.
Much of the time I felt dead inside, and began to doubt loyalties, even my own.
I do not know why.
My week began with being hit in the head by a half empty bottle of sprite thrown from a moving bus window. That sucked. It reminded me of the cruelty amongst children and how often I Used to be teased.
My week ended with a long helpful talk with someone I consider a mentor. It meant a lot to me. Though I hate for him to have seen me like that, I suppose it just means he knows me better now.
I have pushed aside all the doubt that i had about astrology.
There always seems to be a lot on my mind, with little reason for it. Most of the tumoil involves questioning myself. This happens a lot. Friday I forgot to put on the mask. Sometimes my self doubt leads to my best work. I feel a bit better now, mostly because I have something to look forward to at the end of this coming week. I finally got my hands out from under my ass and called her to make plans. (Who ever said she was a fashionista?) ]]> ~Keyboard-Failure-X http://Keyboard-Failure-X.deviantart.com/journal/8220450/ http://Keyboard-Failure-X.deviantart.com/journal/8220450/ Mon, 20 Mar 2006 18:40:05 PST Oddly enough I'm not all stressed out, though that all could change by thursday afternoon.

Perhaps it has something to do with this new girl in my life. I'm still not sure about her, but she's been good company as of late. B just called. I got my hopes up that it was her. How's that for funny? Maybe I do like her afterall.

My self portrait is comming along nicely, I have my head for the most part done, which was the hardest part, glad to get that out of the way first. Honestly, I've only been working on this for a few hours in the production stages. (planning was a bitch) I'm really looking forward to posting this project when I'm done.

My portfolio needs some work, and additions, but I've got a sorta cool idea for a new resume design.

Ok, I'm out, back to work before the parents call it quits and it's quiet time for my drawing.

(can't draw at home in silence) ]]> ~Keyboard-Failure-X http://Keyboard-Failure-X.deviantart.com/journal/8161998/ http://Keyboard-Failure-X.deviantart.com/journal/8161998/ Tue, 14 Mar 2006 18:02:20 PST
For this reason I had to install my brand spanking new LEGAL version of Adobe CS2 Suite on the family computer(where I always access the web)

I really wish things had gone more smoothly so I wouldn't have to just be using W's poster as a template. There doesn't appear to be anything of my creative doing on this project except for the color scheme. Even the tag line in my "sandbox' area was B's. I'd change this all but the preferred deadline is tomorrow.

On a brighter note, I have an AMAZINGLY unique idea for another project due tomorrow. The originallity of my "Backstage Pass" for Coheed and Cambria (I wanted to do AFI) will actually save me work and guarantee me an A+ And I'm very happy that I have Illustrator CS2 to help me do it.

My White Day gifts for two of the special people in my life make me feel so DEVIOUS. I hope they enjoy it.

Not much else to talk about and I need to get back to work. ]]> ~Keyboard-Failure-X http://Keyboard-Failure-X.deviantart.com/journal/8105335/ http://Keyboard-Failure-X.deviantart.com/journal/8105335/ Wed, 08 Mar 2006 16:54:05 PST
In Other News, I don't know if you could call it a date, but if you can, I've got one friiiiday. ^_^ ]]> ~Keyboard-Failure-X http://Keyboard-Failure-X.deviantart.com/journal/8051115/ http://Keyboard-Failure-X.deviantart.com/journal/8051115/ Thu, 02 Mar 2006 20:51:32 PST ~Keyboard-Failure-X http://Keyboard-Failure-X.deviantart.com/journal/8010254/ http://Keyboard-Failure-X.deviantart.com/journal/8010254/ Sun, 26 Feb 2006 15:49:37 PST
That is all. ]]> ~Keyboard-Failure-X http://Keyboard-Failure-X.deviantart.com/journal/7718020/ http://Keyboard-Failure-X.deviantart.com/journal/7718020/ Thu, 26 Jan 2006 21:02:50 PST
In other news life sucks then you die. Kidding.(i've been listening to Reel Big Fish. Cheer Up is stuck in my head) Actually It's a great time to buy paperclips from staples and call them staples. It is also a very creative time for me with no real results, i wish i could actually finish the things i have in my head.

Lazer Tag on Friday. Everyone should go. And coffee. lots of coffee.

OK expect updates within the week. ]]> ~Keyboard-Failure-X http://Keyboard-Failure-X.deviantart.com/journal/7578357/ http://Keyboard-Failure-X.deviantart.com/journal/7578357/ Wed, 11 Jan 2006 21:14:16 PST
Tomorrow is the first Self Diagnosis class at school. I am SO looking forward to it. Aren't we all so fragile inside and out? It sure seems that way. Maybe that's all the more reason I shouldn't be wanting to be alone right now. ]]> ~Keyboard-Failure-X http://Keyboard-Failure-X.deviantart.com/journal/7406852/ http://Keyboard-Failure-X.deviantart.com/journal/7406852/ Sat, 24 Dec 2005 19:39:33 PST My mom bought about a gazillion present for my little cousin. She really loves little kids, I bet she'd have a few more if she could. Thank God that's not happening. Apparently I have a really kickass present that I'm getting tomorrow.
Tonight really didn't feel like Christmas eve used to.

Yesterday was a lot more fun. Thank you very much Momo, Rue, It was a splendid time.
And Morgan, you are SO lucky (or misfortunate if you look at it the other way) that you didn't try to kick my ass.

New Years... I've got the song by Deathcab stuck in my head, but I honestly don't know what i'm doing. No LAN party this year, and I dont' really want to go to a party to watch everyone get wasted... But I could really use that midnight kiss this year(seeing as i missed it last time). In fact, I think I could take falling in love again. I deserve someone better than before. Plus, I really like getting to know amazing people, and I think I'll have a little more time on my hands this semester at school.

Well, I'm too busy enjoying myself and cookies to listen to my aunt blabber about my other aunts and uncles... sooo: i'm going to go play some mindless video games. Killzone? N? who knows.

Deck the Halls! ]]> ~Keyboard-Failure-X http://Keyboard-Failure-X.deviantart.com/journal/7381682/ http://Keyboard-Failure-X.deviantart.com/journal/7381682/ Thu, 22 Dec 2005 11:21:38 PST
Tomorrow is the last day of the semester before my much needed break. I was explaining to a classmate of mine today that even if you don't feel like you're learning anything in a class, that you are just by being there and interacting with the instructor. Somewhere along the line, you will pick up Something, even if it's by osmosis. After my portfolio review today with the same mean SOB as last semester I realized that I couldn't have been more right. I have come so far this semester in school, not only as a student, but as a person philosophically. Though I've been so busy finishing up school that I haven't had much time to spend with them, I'm finding an even deeper appreciation for the few friends that I have. That includes myself. For the first time in a long time today I really felt a higher esteem for who I am. It seems like for a while I was treating myself for face value, just some teenager trying to make it. I suppose losing touch with yourself can be a good thing, but only for a moment in order to stand back and see the bigger picture and understand the world, but for too long, and that world gets pretty lonely. I'm really glad to be feeling the way I am right now.

Now that I'm on break I'll have some more time to myself, so perhaps I'll try to do some bonding with the parents. They've been a good boy and girl staying out of my way this past week while I've been going to work, and school, and doing projects. I feel kind of bad not having gotten them anything for christmas, but then again, I did sort of spend a deal of money on my friends.

Jackie, Morgan, Mike: I love you guys with all my heart.

B, Thank you.

Merry Christmas, everyone. -J. ]]> ~Keyboard-Failure-X http://Keyboard-Failure-X.deviantart.com/journal/7162157/ http://Keyboard-Failure-X.deviantart.com/journal/7162157/ Sun, 27 Nov 2005 20:23:28 PST
It's true. I've been bitten. I fear tomorrow's sun.

If I make a good pillow, you make a good blanket.

Not even for a hundred dollars????

It tastes like bubble gum? weirdo.

I'm going all emo on you punks. black hair dye.

AAAAND i wrote a poem. well, my poems really write themselves, and this one's not that good.

I don't know what else to write.

sayonara suckers! ]]> ~Keyboard-Failure-X http://Keyboard-Failure-X.deviantart.com/journal/7007952/ http://Keyboard-Failure-X.deviantart.com/journal/7007952/ Thu, 10 Nov 2005 10:06:19 PST
If you don't know it. Don't ask. ]]> ~Keyboard-Failure-X http://Keyboard-Failure-X.deviantart.com/journal/6932383/ http://Keyboard-Failure-X.deviantart.com/journal/6932383/ Wed, 02 Nov 2005 04:36:07 PST
With the kids sing out the future.

It seems that a lot of people who are close to me have birthday's in the fall, and though it's still my favorite season, I can't help but think how quickly us kids grow up. When we're little, we can't wait to grow up so we're big and we can do big people things, but I don't think any of us saw it coming that perhaps once we got here, there'd be nothing like the past. I kind of wish that a robot would jump out of my head and make me realize what's really going on inside there. It really makes me sad now, knowing that how true it is that we grow up and grow apart. At the same time it makes me really appreciate the few friends who've stayed close the whole time. You guys, even if you're not on DA and reading this, are really the best, and I love you in a way that I care for very few. Isn't it sort of funny how so many bad things make us realize and see the good part of our lives that we simply overlook so often?

I wish I had a vespa to drive to school.

By the way, my cousin is getting the coolest birthday party this week, I'm pretty sure i can invite any of my friends... so If anyone wishes to join me at javapalooza this friday about 7 ish, let me know.

I feel a poem coming on, sorry that I lost the other one. ]]> ~Keyboard-Failure-X http://Keyboard-Failure-X.deviantart.com/journal/6812390/ http://Keyboard-Failure-X.deviantart.com/journal/6812390/ Wed, 19 Oct 2005 18:17:36 PDT ~Keyboard-Failure-X http://Keyboard-Failure-X.deviantart.com/journal/6804530/ http://Keyboard-Failure-X.deviantart.com/journal/6804530/ Tue, 18 Oct 2005 19:15:53 PDT ~Keyboard-Failure-X http://Keyboard-Failure-X.deviantart.com/journal/6765659/ http://Keyboard-Failure-X.deviantart.com/journal/6765659/ Fri, 14 Oct 2005 11:08:15 PDT ~Keyboard-Failure-X http://Keyboard-Failure-X.deviantart.com/journal/6759859/ http://Keyboard-Failure-X.deviantart.com/journal/6759859/ Thu, 13 Oct 2005 17:32:32 PDT
This morning I woke up with the strangest feeling. I was thinking all morning about my life and how i've grown up to be who i am, and how such a great deal of changes have occured in my personality in the past year. Honestly, i miss the old me, and sometimes think of trying some sort of reformation. Afterschool I picked up Rue, went to a cafe and hung out in middletown. We witnessed an argument in a dollar store about a broken umbrella. i mean who tries to get a replacement umbrella from a dollar store? After that we got hit up for our change by some smooth talker, and after that we met some guy named joe who told us his life story in like 45 minutes. Interesting stories, but strange he'd talk to two teenagers for so long being 41 and all.

I also finally got around to watching the FLCL series(almost a straight marathon). Honestly, i found it depressing just for its accuracy to the mindset of the modern teenager. It was fun to watch, very very funny, and very very odd, but also just plain depressing. It really does point out how quickly things can change in your life when you're growing up, and how no matter what happens, it always feels like nothign important or exciting ever happens to you. When i watched the show i totally fell in love with "Vespa Woman" as she is first introduced. It's almost disturbing how much of the series i understood, seeing as most people think it's about nothing.

To sum up my extremely long journal entry I guess all I have to say is this: Even though I'm really excited to be learning so many new things and moving forward in my life, getting closer to getting out of this town, and away from the past, I still really really miss the way things used to be. I kinda wish I could go back to a time when i wasn't wondering about how i got where i was, and when i wasn't lonely.

sorry. that wasn't much shorter was it?

in the art world: i have photoshop class on fridays now so you can expect some of that to show up here on DA. Also, those of you who know how i write poetry know what i mean when i say "i feel another one coming on" could be a few days. ]]> ~Keyboard-Failure-X http://Keyboard-Failure-X.deviantart.com/journal/6721737/ http://Keyboard-Failure-X.deviantart.com/journal/6721737/ Sun, 09 Oct 2005 14:19:56 PDT
1. I love spicy foods. the hotter the better, until the pain is moderate.

2.I love extreme weather. Hot sunny days are perfect for sunbathing (shhhh rue. no need to tell) Heavy rain makes for amazing showers. Lots of snow gives an excellent opportunity to snuggle up on the couch for a movie.

3.If i'm alone in the car, and i'm playing one of my favorite bands' cds, it's almost a guarantee that i sing.

4.almost all my socks are black. for some reason people ask me why.

5. i'm seriously thinking of dying my hair in the next couple weeks.

6. a lot of my friends think that i'm a total nympho, but i honestly miss being a total romantic. that part of me is still in there somewhere.

7.green tea is one of my favorite things.

8. I don't own a tuxedo, but i wish i had one. I would wear it out all the time for no reason.

9.I have spent about 0.13425925925925925 percent of my life dating or having a major crush.

10.I wouldn't despise doing this if i had some actual questions to answer, i consider myself very open with people once i feel it's appropriate (which is subjective to my judgement no?)

11.when i go to subway i almost always get meatball with american cheese on italian herb and cheese with plenty of hot peppers.

12.My computer could kick your computer's ass (that is... once i upgrade my video card)

13.I like cats better than dogs.

14.I hold the opinion the phrase "better than sex" should always come after the word. "Almost"

15.If i try to prepare food, it always comes out really good, or really bad, but either way it makes a mess.

16.This is my favorite time of the year. september to november.

17. I think it's perfectly acceptable for a guy to wear a belly shirt. but that's probably because i do it all the time.

18. Every time i go to buy chinese food, i get worried that i might accidentally thank them in japanese and they will get mad at me.

19. Sometimes i think i would make an excellent editor for magazines like Cosmo Girl.

20. I just realized i need to buy new clothes. I don't have enough clothes. I want ones to emphasize my sexy styles and moods.

20.1 I'm really glad to have finished this. it took forever.

Tag! YOU"RE IT! aaaaahahahah! now you have to face the torture! ]]> ~Keyboard-Failure-X http://Keyboard-Failure-X.deviantart.com/journal/6576857/ http://Keyboard-Failure-X.deviantart.com/journal/6576857/ Thu, 22 Sep 2005 20:46:32 PDT
Tim was pretty pleased, but i don't know him as a teacher, so i don't know how critical he was.

Susan, my drawing and design professor really liked the progress i made since i started at school and apparently thinks i have a lot of potential, and either an understanding of the concepts, or an underlying feel for it.

Bernard... the meanest SOB you ever met... I kid. he's a nice guy but he gives it to you straight. actually liked it....

sure he gave me a stack of sticky notes of things i had to change in my resume, but at the same time he was pleased to see that it looked like it was made by a graphic designer, and i was the first person to show him one like that, and also have one that he didn't need to "take the book out" for. Just like Susan he thinks i've got some potential as well...

all the stress is melting away. i'm really glad to hear the feedback that i got. I should probably put up some of the other digital work i've done even if it's not interesting...

ok. sorry for wasting your time, i just had to brag about this. ]]> ~Keyboard-Failure-X http://Keyboard-Failure-X.deviantart.com/journal/6556028/ http://Keyboard-Failure-X.deviantart.com/journal/6556028/ Tue, 20 Sep 2005 15:33:33 PDT ~Keyboard-Failure-X http://Keyboard-Failure-X.deviantart.com/journal/6502859/ http://Keyboard-Failure-X.deviantart.com/journal/6502859/ Wed, 14 Sep 2005 12:16:16 PDT
Things i have to do this week.

Draw a self portrait
and do a large movie/entertainment event poster

i need recommendations on what to do for the poster. any ideas?

thanks guys. ]]> ~Keyboard-Failure-X http://Keyboard-Failure-X.deviantart.com/journal/6470206/ http://Keyboard-Failure-X.deviantart.com/journal/6470206/ Sat, 10 Sep 2005 18:15:00 PDT ~Keyboard-Failure-X http://Keyboard-Failure-X.deviantart.com/journal/6449983/ http://Keyboard-Failure-X.deviantart.com/journal/6449983/ Thu, 08 Sep 2005 12:22:30 PDT
anyhow, i have the following titles that you can look forward to. I might change their name last minute, but this might give you an idea


How many emo kids does it take?
TechnocolorMusashi
The Tuxedo
Pink?
Jennifyr in Pen

possibly another couple too.. but i'm not sure.
Anyways, Happy Birthday, Merry Christmas and the such. later. ]]> ~Keyboard-Failure-X http://Keyboard-Failure-X.deviantart.com/journal/6159985/ http://Keyboard-Failure-X.deviantart.com/journal/6159985/ Sun, 07 Aug 2005 14:59:11 PDT
It made me think more about death. I'd say it made me think a lot about it, but it was only a little bit more.

I've always worried that when I die they'd try and dress me up in the coffin, and that's just not cool, i don't like dressing up now unless it's going to be fun, why change then? so the obvious answer is cremation. unless of course they wanted to follow my specific instructions. which since they won't i'm dead serious (oh i just had to say that) cremation is the only way.

(heck, if girls have fun planning outfits for parties, i should feel free to plan my outfit for when i'm dead and may as well have fun doing it)

let's start bottom up, this will be amusing. shoes: would have to be black skate shoes with white or tan details i like vans and etnies. pants: nothing too big, that would look funny, maybe something loose like dickies. also black. shirt. well, guess what color and may as well be nice with this and go button up. tie: red and to top it all off, a studded belt. i've become very fond of them in the past 24 hours.

= ) see? wasn't that fun? yea, i bet it was for you too. yes, i know i'd be a sexy bitch in those clothes.


I'd actually like to hear about all your preferences too, so reply with those, it will be fun to read them.

I know this has been a really long entry about an unusual topic, but it's not like you should really pay any attention. as i said before i'm just making observations. ]]> ~Keyboard-Failure-X http://Keyboard-Failure-X.deviantart.com/journal/5809324/ http://Keyboard-Failure-X.deviantart.com/journal/5809324/ Fri, 01 Jul 2005 07:30:00 PDT
Mood: *unzips pants*
Listening to: Alkaline Trio - Dethbed
Reading: Shogun
Watching: WHA?

At project graduation there was this fortune teller lady, so far she's been dead on. She said the next 2 weeks would be good for financial situations. 2 days later the boss told me i was getting a raise. sweetness no? So if she's that good then i guess i'm looking forwards to a good summer and also my birthday won't suck this year.

Last night I went back to karate class for the first time in about 3 weeks. It was pretty fun Momo-San and I blazed through some Trapping Hands drills. Good to be back.

After that I went out to eat with a certain someone at ION. I don't really know how, but while I was there staring at her ( you can't blame me! there wasn't anything prettier to look at) i realized that she's exactly what I needed in my life (though i'll admit she's a little wild for me, just a tad). She stepped into it with perfect timing too.

Some guys from out west somewhere were playing music and there was one song they had that I really liked "Drunken Angel"

I was thinking this morning that i don't even feel quite like myself and for once i don't think it's a bad thing. And for some reason DA decided i should try a week as a subsriber... Doesn't feel much different.

School starts july 11th for me, I really hope I like it there. but before that i've still got july 4th. If i can i think i'm going to sneak up to the top of a really tall building to watch the fireworks this year.

Peace- i'm out. ]]> ~Keyboard-Failure-X http://Keyboard-Failure-X.deviantart.com/journal/5624454/ http://Keyboard-Failure-X.deviantart.com/journal/5624454/ Sun, 12 Jun 2005 05:14:10 PDT
There was also this thing where this guy thought mike and i were throwing firecrackers, and he went about it in all the wrong way.

I was pretty sure before i even formed the team that there wouldn't really be that much walking going on, and i was pretty right about that. especially with how much time i spent in the tent. Even without the walking i was still worn out by it all.

well, time to go to work. ]]> ~Keyboard-Failure-X http://Keyboard-Failure-X.deviantart.com/journal/5572330/ http://Keyboard-Failure-X.deviantart.com/journal/5572330/ Mon, 06 Jun 2005 16:57:05 PDT
I understand I apparently had glitter all over, but you'd think that after 2 days that it would be gone. Where is it all coming from??? ]]> ~Keyboard-Failure-X http://Keyboard-Failure-X.deviantart.com/journal/5557295/ http://Keyboard-Failure-X.deviantart.com/journal/5557295/ Sun, 05 Jun 2005 04:11:41 PDT ~Keyboard-Failure-X http://Keyboard-Failure-X.deviantart.com/journal/5490513/ http://Keyboard-Failure-X.deviantart.com/journal/5490513/ Sun, 29 May 2005 06:14:29 PDT Drinking: would be green tea, but I just don’t feel like it. That or something strong…

Tonight oddly enough, went exactly as I expected it… sort of. I’m starting to ask myself if I should have even gone. What was the point really? I didn’t really have a date: something I was looking forward to since I first asked. How confused her parents will be… A few words here or there, at one time or another, one response or another on my part would have changed it all. Regret. I’m hardly sure what’s stopping me from constructing a beautiful necklace to wear to make up for tonight, not to mention the past year. I thought driving home tonight how strange it would feel ten years from now and thinking of what I was like growing up. At the very least a poem came of tonight, but who saw that one coming? To think, what next week will be like, I’m not sure I can handle it, and the week after that. I’m almost positive that I cannot. This life of mine is slowly killing me just a bit faster than it should. All I can say is that I can try my best to speak when I must and silence myself when it is appropriate. Appropriateness is my new word of the week. I’m proud in a certain few for displaying it, and disappointed in others for not. Myself included in both categories for moments here and moments there, despite the mask I wore being so fake and so obvious. I don’t know how much more I can fit into this journal before people stop reading or become offended. If either, I apologize and may be able to rephrase, however to the bored I cannot paraphrase. My mind is far too a tempest to convey it all here as it is.

Goodnight everyone, I hope you had the time of your life. ]]> ~Keyboard-Failure-X http://Keyboard-Failure-X.deviantart.com/journal/5471165/ http://Keyboard-Failure-X.deviantart.com/journal/5471165/ Thu, 26 May 2005 18:50:50 PDT
Somehow karate was harder for me today. Just going through Mass Attacks a few times I was out of breath and sweating a great deal. Not sure what's up with that. I bet my heart's going. I wouldn't be surprised.

Well, I'm going to go to bed now. Best of wishes. ]]> ~Keyboard-Failure-X http://Keyboard-Failure-X.deviantart.com/journal/5460693/ http://Keyboard-Failure-X.deviantart.com/journal/5460693/ Wed, 25 May 2005 19:14:07 PDT
On the other hand I gave blood today. It's sort of strange to me now how people get freaked out by needles and seeing their own blood... I'm not sure I understand what the problem is with it. I mean, sure I used to look away as a kid but that's only because it hurt then and I thought it wouldn't hurt as much that way. I said to someone that i got "vampired" today. they laughed...

I'm really tired now. Quite frankly I'm just not looking forward to anything in the following month anymore like I used to. But as my cousin/brother/best friend i've ever had says, "Just keep moving on to each new thing." I'm so glad I have him around. I miss him a lot, but he's in Vermont this week. As I said: tired. ]]> ~Keyboard-Failure-X http://Keyboard-Failure-X.deviantart.com/journal/5452052/ http://Keyboard-Failure-X.deviantart.com/journal/5452052/ Tue, 24 May 2005 20:30:03 PDT
I don't really understand (I have that tendency not to) Senior year is supposed to be the best time of your life no?

apparently not. So far i've had 2 overall good months, and I think it's starting to show.
Relatives, Teachers, Instructors. I've heard them all ask why I don't smile much. Yea, you probably see me laugh and smile, but it's hard not to when i'm with my friends, and hard to when i'm by myself, which is a lot of the time.

The small things seem to matter less and less, and the big picture doesn't seem too bright either. Watching the news makes me sick. Then again, what doesn't...

Good News: I broke a cinderblock at karate today. big whoop.

Bad News: I keep waking up every day as the same person.


Song of the evening: "the district sleeps alone" by the Postal Service. ]]> ~Keyboard-Failure-X http://Keyboard-Failure-X.deviantart.com/journal/5394938/ http://Keyboard-Failure-X.deviantart.com/journal/5394938/ Wed, 18 May 2005 18:33:13 PDT
We had tea together. I chose one of his cups that had a huge crack in it. but it was the most appealing to me anyhow. it was short and wide, white with roses. And i thought that, from the outside the cup looks beautiful, but looking down into it you can see it's broken inside. yes, if you fill it with too much it cannot handle it all and leaks, but if you hold it to one side, it holds its own.

Something about that makes me feel a little better about myself.
Even if there are some things which i cannot handle a lot of, and like a leaky cup i can let people down, I still have at least one good side. In that light any cup, or anyone can be perfect, if you're willing to give the right side a chance.

I hope anyone who reads this and has had a day in which they were just unhappy with themselves, or perhaps another, can understand this nearly nonsensical stuffs and make some use of it. ]]> ~Keyboard-Failure-X http://Keyboard-Failure-X.deviantart.com/journal/5394130/ http://Keyboard-Failure-X.deviantart.com/journal/5394130/ Wed, 18 May 2005 16:57:44 PDT today has been interesting. I've found out that there is a second team for the relay for life from my school, this one goaded on like slaves by our administration. also it seems that they have a late start. sucks for them that Phoenix Down has already hit up every teacher we have for money, at least so it seems.

Anyhow, today i got to go to Wild Orchid with Momo to place our order for prom. glad to have that out of the way. also bought tickets. I find it funny that john just spent at least a hundred bucks on airsoft guns, but complains today about not having money for tickets... but that's just the way i look at it.

I was feeling rather philosophical today on that trip. I ended up shouting out my own version of the fall of lucifer/paradise lost in the car. and then complaining about people saying that words cannot describe things, because unless i am mistaken, they are using words and they are describing things. even "undescribable" is an adjective, which if you look up in most dictionaries, you will find is a Descriptor.

Anyway, this is my section to remind myself that i'm going to get Momo a Hello Kitty Picture frame for her birthday. perhaps by then i'll remember that i never gave anyone my senior pictures, so i suppose i can put one of those in it. can't you see it now? my pretty face, and hello kitty? actually i prefer the bad penguin Batz Maru.....

I finished watching Samurai Champloo today, i really wish there was more... the end was satisfying i suppose. I want a poster.

i think i have discovered the reason why i sometimes become so lonely and unhappy, and i believe it is that while i'm with myself i have too much time to think. When i am with people i can see how i affect them and i suppose it makes me feel a lot better about anything. and you know, occasionally it's fun.

I really want a sword. i think i will place that on my list of birthday gifts to give myself. that's item number two.

my appologies for this being so long. ]]> ~Keyboard-Failure-X http://Keyboard-Failure-X.deviantart.com/journal/5386125/ http://Keyboard-Failure-X.deviantart.com/journal/5386125/ Tue, 17 May 2005 19:11:14 PDT
Today was the first time i went back to a tuesday class at karate in a long time.
I tried breaking a huge stack of rebreakable boards with a half fist strike. i think it was the first break i ever failed at.
I also messed up my left thumb in class too.

Tom gave me some pretty sweet piano instrumentals for some linkin park songs.

Assembly at school to watch a one man performance dealing with, drugs, daterape, self esteem, respect, all those good/bad things that everyone deals with every day. I don't think i've ever sat through a more worthwhile assembly.

I'm hungry. *food*

i like that song that papa roach has out "scars" some of it sounds a little cliched but i like it because most of it's true. and it sounds good. ]]> ~Keyboard-Failure-X http://Keyboard-Failure-X.deviantart.com/journal/5323520/ http://Keyboard-Failure-X.deviantart.com/journal/5323520/ Tue, 10 May 2005 18:44:44 PDT
The highs are high. the lows are low, but all of it feels like one big movie. Sometimes i just want someone to call scene, and others i'm affraid that the curtains will fall long before i'm ready to let the moment go. ]]> ~Keyboard-Failure-X http://Keyboard-Failure-X.deviantart.com/journal/4897036/ http://Keyboard-Failure-X.deviantart.com/journal/4897036/ Thu, 24 Mar 2005 04:46:26 PST I watch so emptily as those I hold closest pass through life torn apart by those they once cherished. And indirectly, but assuredly it kills me too. Why this tormented world is so Fucked up, I don't think I'll ever know.

My best friend in the world had is heart chewed out by his ex last night for no reason. He's always had the most positive outlook on life that you could imagine. From the day I remember really knowing his name I've watched him turn from a greedy, selfish boy into a caring, intelligent man. He's the one of the only ones who could make me feel better about last september, and now i don't know what i can do to help him.

On a brighter note, i'm really glad i have a few certain friends with whom i've grown closer in the past few months, and i hope never to lose their friendship.

Also i wanted to say that i have decided to head up my own team for the relay for life this year to raise money for cancer research. it was a good time the last two years and i hope it can be just as good as it was before. i'm glad that i'll have mike on my team. after losing our grandmother to leukemia when we were 8 and 9 i feel guilty that i don't ever go to visit her. occasionally i can admit to crying as we pass by the cemetery. now this year i found out that one of my aunts has breast cancer and it was a harsh reminder. i'm beyond appreciative that i have something i can do to help with this. As far as joining my team: it's by invite only for certain reasons. sorry.

Thanks for reading all that if you did. it was pretty long...

life sucks. life is amazing.... but where will i go from here? ]]> ~Keyboard-Failure-X