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yourself to drift off as you fall deeper and deeper into a more
relaxed state of mind. Now, as I count back from ten to one, you
Suprised anyone took the time to read my last journal! Thanks, everything is better now.

will feel more peaceful and calm. Ten. Nine. Eight. Seven. Six.
You will enter a safe place where nothing can harm you. Five.
This morning...Wait background, two buses come to Broughton one for Ulverston one for Barrow... This morning a bus came up "Ulverston", someone got off, which meant it was the Barrow bus, but as soon as the person got off the fucking bus sped off into the distance, so I had to get the Ulverston bus to get a Barrow bus to get here...











Click here to *hug* me!

Pictures Made For Me:
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Close your eyes and begin to relax. Take a deep breath, and let
it out slowly. Concentrate on your breathing. With each breath
Last night felt like a dream, I got home thinking I could get on with shit, I couldn't. I got home, got tangled in wires, I took my decks up into the loft nearly breaking my arms, I brought the keyboard down, almost fell, I got pissed off at a microphone, I got a text off which said I couldn't record because no-one was there, I thought he was lying but I left it, (recording for my Media Studies) tried to clean up my room, failed, started reading my new Drummer Magazine, couldn't focus, went round to 's, my tamagotchi died, everyone was there, Thea phoned me up, I forgot to phone her, I recorded, I went home, phoned her, talked to her, threw my phone across the room, bit it, cracking the screen, she said we'd talk today, went to sleep, woke up at 2am, drenched in my own sweat, went back to sleep, kept waking up, went and had a shower (this is now today), got a lift in, waited for Thea so we could talk, tell her I'm sorry and I wish last night WAS a dream, she came in with CD player on, I asked if she wanted a cigarette she said no, so I went out for one on my own, came in, sat down, she asked if she could have a cigarette I gave her one....That's the story so far... I'm gonna e-mail her pictures during my ICT lesson...

you become more relaxed. Imagine a brilliant white light above
you. Focus in on this light as it flows through your body. Allow
http://Kota.deviantart.com/journal/7748303/ Mon, 30 Jan 2006 06:40:44 PST Check my Badd Ass Links!

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All the thoughts I'm singing you defour and why
Why Why
The hidden Star Wars Film - [link]

Why Why
So I felt like the biggest asshole
Big Gun is the new project between Adam () and I

When I killed rock n roll
When I felt like the biggest asshole
Nothing that new happening apart from me finding Revelations.

When I killed rock n roll
Hypnotherapist:
Fuck it, I can't think of much else to say except more coming soon!

Deviation Of Choice 017

Click here to *hug*... ]]> ~Kota http://Kota.deviantart.com/journal/7636056/ http://Kota.deviantart.com/journal/7636056/ Wed, 18 Jan 2006 04:19:42 PST Check my Badd Ass Links!

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Accidents happen In the dark
Eat all the grass that you want
Just got slagged off for my Vic Rattlehead, I hate people who just say it's shit not something like "it's good but you could ....".

Accidents happen In the dark
Eat all the grass that you want
I should have a cheque waiting for me at home for £88, w00t money!

Accidents happen In the dark
Eat all the grass that you want
The S.T.I practice was pretty fun.

Accidents happen
Every time I look In your eyes, every day I'm watching you die
Yes, Power Rangers The Movie, Kyle put it on his laptop, God it's so funny, like *Pink Ranger back flips away* (Billy):"I'm right behind you Kim" *follows her BACKFLIPPING!*

http://Kota.deviantart.com/journal/7627528/ Tue, 17 Jan 2006 07:26:14 PST Check my Badd Ass Links!

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When I killed your rock n roll
(Mowed down the sexy people)
Just submitted what I think could be my best deviation yet, Vic for the Megadeth competition.

Every time I look In your eyes, every day I'm watching you die
All the thoughts I'm singing you defour and why...
The fudge on miniture heroes is Elton John XD.

Eat all the grass
Eat all the grass that you want
Shock The Industry's first practice today, can't wait should be fun.

Deviation Of Choice 015

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We hate everyone
We don't care what you think
First off, happy new year.

So I felt like the biggest asshole
Felt like the biggest asshole
I've moved from Dalton-In-Furness to Broughton-In-Furness with Thea. I'll be back in Dalton every Monday for band practice and stuff though.

when I killed your rock and roll
Mowed down the sexy people
Money problems as always, I need to cut down with the smoking, knowing my luck it won't happen until I run out of money!

Every time I look in your eyes, every day I'm watching you die
All the faults I see in you die, and why?
I'm getting things in my life slowly, but surely sorted out but no doubt when I hit eighteen it'll all go to shit, but I'll manage.

So I'm like the biggest asshole
(I am the biggest asshole)
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Don't believe in you - and that's true
We hate everyone
Love what they've done with the DA bit at the top, very cool.

We hate everyone
Some would say that we're biased
I have 6,000 pageviews OMG! So thanks to all that make it happen.

Accusations that we are racist
Well, shit comes in all hues
I got an A in my Film coursework, fucking hooray!

Now this means you
Cause things ain't always like they seem
This is prolly gonna be my last entry until after christmas so hope you all have a merry one.

Like they seem
We hate everyone
Going to watch Doom in Lancaster with Thea and Hopper tommorow.

~Kota http://Kota.deviantart.com/journal/7235231/ http://Kota.deviantart.com/journal/7235231/ Tue, 06 Dec 2005 04:33:40 PST Check my Badd Ass Links!

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Labelled racist
Want it clearer?
First lesson, nothing, silly questionaire. Second lesson Steven King (not the novelist, acts more like Jeremy Clarkson) took us, this lesson, shit.

Check the mirror
We don't care what you think
Thea's staying at mine tonight, gonna watch Pink Floyd - The Wall, as I found the video of it at her house.

Lies and slander in vain try to shame us
Riots, protests, violence just makes us famous
Shock The Industry should be in practice mode soon (I hope/wish)

TV interviews, free publicity
Increase record sales dramatically
I'm changing a lot of my personal spaces on the web, the Krow thing has worn off, I realised as much as I love the name I'd rather be known as me, Irwin, even though my real name is shit!

The left they say I'm a fascist ~Kota http://Kota.deviantart.com/journal/7182529/ http://Kota.deviantart.com/journal/7182529/ Wed, 30 Nov 2005 04:16:45 PST Check my Badd Ass Links!

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Right wing commies
Leftist Nazis
Havn't written a journal for a while. So I thought I will.

Point their finger
Rumours linger
Last day of November! I don't really have much to write, nine deviations to put up.

We don't care what you think
Branded sexist
Sorry about it being so boring but nothing much has happened so...

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I'm not afraid of happy endings
I'm just afraid my life won't work that way
Alright! Well Jake the drummer from Cerberus has left for his other band Nothing Less so they are thinking of getting me in, so tonight when Thea has gone to silversmithing I shall put their demo on and learn the songs (again!).

I'm not afraid of forgiveness
I absolve you everything
There isn't really that much else to catch up on I don't think...My Deviation Of Choice had to be that I know a lot of you will know where it originated from those who don't, click and check the comment.

I'm not afraid of lying...
But I am afraid of dying
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Fear of
Fear of
Thea and I are now talking various things through but I think and hope it's gonna be ok now.

Fear of
Fear of
Two models, and , have approached me for Love The Stomach and I can either get them in the same room sometime (hopefully) or use stock photos.

I'm not afraid of looking ugly
I couldn't care what they say
Going to get my... ]]> ~Kota http://Kota.deviantart.com/journal/6912329/ http://Kota.deviantart.com/journal/6912329/ Mon, 31 Oct 2005 03:06:08 PST Check my Badd Ass Links!

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Without you yes I do and I hope that you do too
Without you yes I do
Well! I lost her, then I got her back, then I lost her and now we are seeing each other... I lied to her and cannot forgive myself for it but I won't moan I just don't think so it's my own fault. Anyway I'll shut up now.

Without you yes I do and I hope that you do too
Without you yes I...
Right I need two models near to me or willing to do stock for me, I need a female willing to show her stomach and a male willing to show his hands, any help would be greatly appretiated (sp?).

Deviation Of Choice 008

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I'm just afraid of forgetting
And I am afraid of dying
Thea thinks we should split up and just be friends. My life feels like it could end...Yeah I'm prolly talking bollocks but "I'd sooner take my life away than live with losing you" amongst various other lyrics keep flying around in my head. I don't want to lose her, never.... I don't know, if we are "friends" I'll want to be close to her all the time, then know that I can't be, so I'll just go crazy. IF I'm still going to London I have to share a bed with her, that's like saying "here's a free romantic evening, take someone you know you can't do anything with". AAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHH. It can't rain all the time, but when it does it pours. It's pouring in my life, so everyone else should be tripping style happy. I'll stop being so EMO now and shut up, no-one's acctually gonna care or read this anyway and if they do I'll prolly find something they're wrong about. Go me -_-. I STILL LOVE HER, I DON'T WANT TO LOSE HER.

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Without you yes I do and I hope that you do too
Without you yes I do
I'm going to London a week today with Thea, we are going to see We Will Rock You. HELL YEAH!

Without you yes I do and I hope that you do too
Without you yes I...
No Time is my main focus at the moment, it's gonna be a story that I will deliver in four seperate parts then in one lump as a final final piece. I hope you all enjoy it and I hope people are bold enough to draw the characters out of it or something 'cause when people do that I love to see what they get as an image in their head...

I'm not afraid of being sick
I'm more afraid of being well
The Bor!alus thing will begin shortly, I haven't been at home this week but hopefully I'll start popping in the... ]]> ~Kota http://Kota.deviantart.com/journal/6754627/ http://Kota.deviantart.com/journal/6754627/ Thu, 13 Oct 2005 05:23:12 PDT Check my Badd Ass Links!

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I'm not afraid of standing still
I'm just afraid of being bored
As annoying as it is I always get bored of my Journal layout, so here's a new one. It's got Jack Off Jill lyrics to begin every red or purple bullet point. Dunno why! Just a lot of fun!

I'm not afraid of speaking my mind
I'm just afraid of being ignored
I've also cleaned my Deviation list so there's not many left!!!

I'm not afraid of feeling
and I'm not afraid of trying
All you who go on SPiNchat.com go to the temp' room Bor!alus, RP'ing is back! It's gonna be this...Please come on we need people! that's Bor!alus.... the awesome RP room! Use the /ooc command if it isn't RP, BE WARNED lol.

I'm just afraid of losing
And I am afraid of dy... ]]> ~Kota http://Kota.deviantart.com/journal/6665755/ http://Kota.deviantart.com/journal/6665755/ Mon, 03 Oct 2005 05:15:15 PDT Check my Badd Ass Links!

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Love The Stomach
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