http://search.deviantart.com/?q=by:LadyofDiamonds19&section=today deviantART RSS for by:LadyofDiamonds19 en-us Copyright 2009, deviantART.com Sun, 06 Dec 2009 13:45:11 PST deviantART.com http://blogs.law.harvard.edu/tech/rss http://s.deviantart.com/minish/widgets/apple-touch-icon-precomposed.png http://LadyofDiamonds19.deviantart.com/journal/15485233/ http://LadyofDiamonds19.deviantart.com/journal/15485233/ Mon, 12 Nov 2007 20:14:47 PST Bleach by a longshot.

]]> ~LadyofDiamonds19 http://LadyofDiamonds19.deviantart.com/journal/13237282/ http://LadyofDiamonds19.deviantart.com/journal/13237282/ Wed, 06 Jun 2007 09:32:31 PDT
]]> ~LadyofDiamonds19 http://LadyofDiamonds19.deviantart.com/journal/12899619/ http://LadyofDiamonds19.deviantart.com/journal/12899619/ Wed, 09 May 2007 12:42:03 PDT
I'm so miserable. I wanted to please God, but I don't know if He'd really be pleased by my efforts. I read ten or so chapter of Genesis yesterday to get an idea, and now, now I know I can't do anything.

I'm too human, after all.

]]> ~LadyofDiamonds19 http://LadyofDiamonds19.deviantart.com/journal/12879756/ http://LadyofDiamonds19.deviantart.com/journal/12879756/ Mon, 07 May 2007 18:15:26 PDT
I've been going to sites for writing tips. I've been having a lot of fun in that area.

Anyway, there comes a time when I really want to write God into a story as a main character. So I've been studying Him and analyzing Him and His motives. So far, it's been a rewarding process.

I've been praying a lot about this idea. I don't have a plot as of yet, but right now I'm focused on trying to get as much knowledge as I can about God. I know that He's righteous, holy, and all that. But for a good story I must TELL Him righteous, holy, just, and loving.

If it's a good enough story and God allows me to put it up in public, I'd want people to see God in my work, and not the false public image of a grandfatherly figure wearing a white sheet up in heaven who grants every wish, or the stern figure ready to strike bolts of lightning upon anyone.

I want God's majesty, God's beauty, God's passion, God's dreams, goals, wishes, the deepest desires of His heart--I want HIM to be manifested.

To do so I must study, study, study, study Him more intently than I have ever studied anyone before.

I read TTT several times over (I think three) to get that guy's persona down pat, but I must read the Bible through many more times to find out more about God.

From experience I know that its best to wait before diving into a story. I find I write a story about Sherlock Holmes, I must KNOW Sherlock Holmes. Same goes with Thrawn or anyone else. One must have a LOT of knowledge about someone, whether fictional or not, before writing.

Right now, I'm just trying to read through the Bible. So one step at a time until I reach my goal.

I'm in Genesis, btw, and having the time of my life.

]]> ~LadyofDiamonds19 http://LadyofDiamonds19.deviantart.com/journal/12248656/ http://LadyofDiamonds19.deviantart.com/journal/12248656/ Mon, 19 Mar 2007 17:29:37 PDT
Story is set in future and in our own galaxy.

I may be a little too nervous, but I really want to work on a story in which I don't feel like I'm stealing copyrighted material. I just want to be on the safe side.

Oh, yeah, they also have their own empire (but it isn't run by Houses).

]]> ~LadyofDiamonds19 http://LadyofDiamonds19.deviantart.com/journal/11645154/ http://LadyofDiamonds19.deviantart.com/journal/11645154/ Thu, 01 Feb 2007 09:09:51 PST
We prayed. She didn't have her kittens. She was almost put to sleep.

I cried.

But we managed to get the operation done plus an added hysterectomy.

It's been an emotional roller coaster from all of us. I think, especially from me, since Pickles is my cat and I'm very close to her.

Will be posting pictures up soon.

There are four kittens in total. Because their mother is currently sore from the said c-section and hysterectomy, she has been hissing at her kittens when they come near her.

No kitten died. We are bottle-feeding them until their mom feels better. Stayed up late last night. Had some nightmares about Pickles.

]]> ~LadyofDiamonds19 http://LadyofDiamonds19.deviantart.com/journal/11348218/ http://LadyofDiamonds19.deviantart.com/journal/11348218/ Sun, 07 Jan 2007 10:14:21 PST

Everything is going to pass away in the last days. And my fan-fics are included in that. So the time spent with God is very special to me.

Oh, and Pickles accepts the kitten now!

]]> ~LadyofDiamonds19 http://LadyofDiamonds19.deviantart.com/journal/11153291/ http://LadyofDiamonds19.deviantart.com/journal/11153291/ Fri, 22 Dec 2006 17:35:58 PST
Amber kept him inside her room for two days, thinking that Peeps (our male cat by one year) would fight him. It turns out that Peeps and the kitten, Momo, are best buds. Peeps doesn't usually share his food and stuff. In fact, it's unheard of. Normally he growls and hisses or shoves Pickles out of the way so he can get to the food. But Peeps shares with Momo.

In fact, they croon, play, share, sleep, and do a lot of things together. What's weird is that we all were expecting a big fight to happen between the kitten and Peeps and for Pickles to be the excepting one. Pickles is still growling and hissing at the kitten. She growls at Peeps (who is her official mate) who pays more attention to the kitten than her.

I only wish I wasn't sick with a blasted cold! The kitten is very smart (only two days and already knows that his name is Momo and comes when called), and very cuddly!

]]> ~LadyofDiamonds19 http://LadyofDiamonds19.deviantart.com/journal/11066282/ http://LadyofDiamonds19.deviantart.com/journal/11066282/ Thu, 14 Dec 2006 19:24:42 PST
The reason why I'm doing this is because my relationship with God had been failing in the past three years. I want to return back to where I used to be with God, and I can't if something is distracting me. That distraction was Thrawn so I'm getting rid of him.

The story I was working on was sixty-nine digital pages long, twenty-eight thousand plus words, and had six chapters completed. I may never put it up on this site nor on FanFiction.net.

The Clone, Legacy, and Shadow of a Threat ceases work from now on. I am sorry, but there was no other way. I tried to straddle the fence, but I have an obsession compulsion disorder (something along those lines) and it proved to be impossible. Also, some of the stories I knew God wouldn't be pleased with because they began to become more and more secular.

I think there comes a point in time when someone must draw a line.

And I'm drawing that line now.

It won't be the only time I've had to do this, so I've had experience. I believe it's what God would want me to do.

]]> ~LadyofDiamonds19 http://LadyofDiamonds19.deviantart.com/journal/10995158/ http://LadyofDiamonds19.deviantart.com/journal/10995158/ Fri, 08 Dec 2006 13:20:56 PST
I learned a lot of words since last words. Many prefixes mean the same thing, though, and so I get confused. Also, there are some that look the same like inter, intra, infra. Also I have trouble with definition of "de". Down from, something something. As I said I have some problems with it.

The suffixes were farely easy, though I was confused with graph and graphy. Also confused by scope, scopy, stomy, etc. We haven't actually practised transcribing yet, since we are still dealing with grammar and word particles.

Also, I am working on a fan-fiction in my spare time. Again, it concerns my semi-original character female Thrawn clone. While reading the prior sentence I realize, "Hey! That sounds like a Mary Sue!" All is written from the point of view of my true original character, Cecilia Hart. Who I tried desperately not to turn into a Mary Sue. And no, it is NOT slash! I may put it up on FF.net or elsewhere. So far, the rating is a safe PG. I would like to continue with that rating set in mind.

I like working with the clone of Thrawn. She's very enigmatic and while writing I can't help but feel for her while being in awe of her. And I like my original characters like Velkor (Chiss) and Gackt (Chiss). So far no humans have entered the story so I'll just use Chiss.

I think Velkor would be a nice Chiss to meet if it were possible. He's a little blond but I like him that way. He's also polite, sympathetic, warm, and I can relate to him more than the others. Gackt has appeared once so far. I named him after the Japanese rock artist so that I could annoy Cecilia (who hates the said singer and whose sister adores him). That was fun. But he really has no weight in the story.

It's mostly about Cecilia's struggles as she realizes she may never see her family again (oh, yeah--she came from Earth) and Thrawn as she struggles through being a female. Together they enter a polite acquaintance to a deep friendship (especially after Cecilia discover's the clone's secret).

I wrote it basically for my own enjoyment. Writing is a lot like reading a book except I'm adding to it as I go along. I'm a real sucker at getting emotional and sobbing my heart out at minutely tragic parts for my characters. I haven't yet done that yet for the current story.

So far I'm not even bothering to see if things are accurate or not. The setting is the Hand of Thrawn Fortress and there's not really that much there to bother with accuracy since I've forgotten some details. All that can be forgiven, though.

The clone does do a few things that seem out-of-character, but I want to make it so that one understand the reasoning behind it later on.

The story would be in a generalized category, I think. I'm not sure what to name it.

Note: This message was copy-pasted from my Xanga account which I recently updated. This was that update.

]]> ~LadyofDiamonds19 http://LadyofDiamonds19.deviantart.com/journal/10820372/ http://LadyofDiamonds19.deviantart.com/journal/10820372/ Thu, 23 Nov 2006 08:15:15 PST

I'm about to go to my grandmother's house. Usually she cooks everything, but since she's not getting any younger my mom decided to make a lot of things yesterday to bring today. I think she made, like, eight things. O.O

I hope everything goes smoothly. We're bringing board games up there, too. Usually someone brings video tapes, but board games are something everyone can participate in.

My cousin won't be making it since she has to work today, but I wonder if her two little kids will come?

]]> ~LadyofDiamonds19 http://LadyofDiamonds19.deviantart.com/journal/10754434/ http://LadyofDiamonds19.deviantart.com/journal/10754434/ Fri, 17 Nov 2006 09:57:39 PST I had to return Outbound Flight back to the library yesterday along with Survivor's Quest. Now I'm without anything Thrawn-related. I like having the novels around because I feel more secure about writing fanfctions then (even if I don't open the books I have more confidence).

At least I have Heir to the Empire. But that's not the Thrawn I'm interested in. I'm more interested in the younger version as most of my new ideas come from that area.

I let my old muses wandered around for a bit and then... they never returned. O.O *sniffle* *sob* *sniffle*

At least Pickles is feeling better today! She laid down on my back, clawed at my bathrobe, and then decided to later lay on my lap. Last night I placed food and water and a litterbox in my room for Pickles. I wanted to give her time away from Peeps, who kept wanting to mate with her.

My plan didn't work.

Peeps kept me up with his constant meowing outside my door. Pickles, meanwhile, had a pattern of eating, sitting on my windowsill to look outside, then she would go over to the closed door to Peeps.

I ended up letting Pickles out, thinking Peeps wanted to see her that bad. Turned out all he wanted was the food she was eating even though I had filled his own bowl up with the same stuff! He's piggy.

So both cats remained outside my room and I remained with the fresh kitty litter tray, cat food, and water.

]]> ~LadyofDiamonds19 http://LadyofDiamonds19.deviantart.com/journal/10735987/ http://LadyofDiamonds19.deviantart.com/journal/10735987/ Wed, 15 Nov 2006 16:01:08 PST
I'm hoping that that wasn't the only kitten. That would be very sad.

Anyway I'm happy that Pickles, the mother cat, is okay. She's walking around meowing at people, demanding attention. She's so noisy.

She kept licking and purring over the dead kitten and my mom had to discreetly remove it from the shelf. Then Pickles decided to try to search for it, meowing everywhere for the kitten. Now she just wants to be held and comforted.

I guess now we know it DEFINITELY was NOT a false pregnancy like I had thought earlier this week.

Earlier today I picked her up and she just started to have contractions (or visible ones at least) in my arms. Then she panicked and ran everywhere to find a place to give birth (ended up being my lower drawer which I cleaned out for her use).

]]> ~LadyofDiamonds19 http://LadyofDiamonds19.deviantart.com/journal/10690117/ http://LadyofDiamonds19.deviantart.com/journal/10690117/ Sat, 11 Nov 2006 12:54:30 PST
My entire family is going into medical transcription. Me, my mom, and my sisters will all be taking classes at home this year using Career Step. I'm very excited about it. We really could use the extra money on house payments and Dad's humongous hospital bill. Not only that, but I feel that a great change is about to happen.

Something is going to happen around the corner, like a turning point for my family.

Even my older sister is interested in transcription. That means that my whole family will be working together in the same house to earn an income. That thought rocks my socks!

And, because I will be studying grammar it would improve my story writing skills.

I really believe that God had been preparing my family for this and that this is what He wants us to do. I prayed really hard about this and I have a lot of joy and peace about it.

We won't be getting jobs anytime soon, as the first year will be primarily schooling and then the next we can move up to working for a company.

At first I wasn't so excited about it, but now I'm very optimistic. Mom's about to burst with happiness. My sister is really enthusiastic, too. Everyone is brimming with excitement.

We know it will be hard work, but it will pay off.

I'm sooooooooooooooooooooooooo happy!!!!!!!!!!!! : ): )

]]> ~LadyofDiamonds19 http://LadyofDiamonds19.deviantart.com/journal/10635060/ http://LadyofDiamonds19.deviantart.com/journal/10635060/ Mon, 06 Nov 2006 10:29:55 PST
63 BLEACH anime episodes? Gone and good riddance!

All those Thrawn sound files I downloaded? GONE! And I really don't give a care. In fact, I'm a bit relieved.

Too bad I can't remove everything from the folder Shared, but since its not really my computer but my sisters' and mom's computer as well, I can't do that.

I almost want to sneak out in the middle of the night and erase everything of little importance. I like J-Rock. I have two CDs filled with JRock Mp3s that I burned off the computer. But enough is ENOUGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

]]> ~LadyofDiamonds19 http://LadyofDiamonds19.deviantart.com/journal/10558524/ http://LadyofDiamonds19.deviantart.com/journal/10558524/ Mon, 30 Oct 2006 11:17:03 PST Legacy and the Clone and all that--instead I've been dawdling around trying to get back my muse! Grrrrr..... I'm so frustrated.

]]> ~LadyofDiamonds19 http://LadyofDiamonds19.deviantart.com/journal/10371156/ http://LadyofDiamonds19.deviantart.com/journal/10371156/ Thu, 12 Oct 2006 16:04:38 PDT
When did Thrawn first start collecting art?

What was his relationship with Thrass?

Were they always close?

What relationship did he have to his father?

What was his father like?

Did Thrawn pick up art as a hobby and as a psychological tool through a certain family member?

How old was he when he was adopted?

How old was he in OBF?

How did he begin to change from the idealist in OBF to the way he became in TTT?

What was going through his head during exile?

How did he handle the exile?

How does he see so much through art (I'm probably just an idiot but I really couldn't comprehend even though he explained it some in OBF)?

Did he always want to be a part of the CEDF?

How did his subordinates take his fighting methods on a personal, private scale?

What was his relationship with Ar'alani aside from the relationship of a superior officer toward a subordinate?

What is his favorite type of music? (everyone says it would be classical, but people can REALLY surprise you and those who enjoy classical oftentimes enjoy death metal or alternative rock)

What type of food do the Chiss eat?

Was Thrawn allergic to certain foods?

Was he really muscular, solid, well built--or was he rake thin like Sherlock Holmes?

Was his hair long during Mist Encounter or did he hack it off with a machete (or dagger) during his stay to keep it from slowing him down?

How much did he weigh?

How tall was he in feet and inches?

How did the people Thrawn conquered view him?

What was going through his head when he agreed to use the Noghri race for his purposes even though in OBF he hated slavery?

Does he have any phobias? (he can still be courageous through the phobias--Thrawn isn't a weakling)

Is Thrawn somewhat religious in a Chissi way?

Do the Chiss even have a type of religion?

What sort of religion would it be?

What happens when a Chiss woman has PMS but has to obey the standards of society and has trouble holding back anger?

When a Chiss female is on her period is it the same as when human females are on their periods or is it a bit different?

Is the gestation period longer, shorter, or the same length as a human female?

What did Ar'alani do during those times as CEDF officer?

Are Chiss like Vulcans or is their culture and strict rules more akin to Japanese society on Earth?

Does the Chiss change skin hue as they get older?

Do they play as children/are they allowed to play?

What games do their children partake in?

Did Thrawn have any close friends when he was a child?

Did he ever fall in love?

Was he married during his exile?

What was his wife's stand among the Chiss?

Did he ever contact her again?

If Thrawn had a choice between a string guitar, piano, harp, or flute what would he pick?

Did Thrawn ever have regrets for certain decisions?

How does he truly feel about annihilating an entire race?

Did he become so corrupt that he doesn't care at all (has no regrets) or is it that he has resolved not to think too closely on things?

Why did he decide to use C'baoth when he had been making so many victories without him in the UR?

What does he think about innocence and about children?

What was going through his head when he offered C'baoth to give him Leia's twin children in payment for his services?

What went through his head as he died?

What type of woman would he be attracted to?

Has he ever cried about something?

Do Chiss cry like humans, or do they grieve in a way much different?

Has Thrawn ever had his heart broken in grief or loss of a friend or family member?

When did he discover Thrass would never return?

What clothing would he wear if he wasn't in a uniform of some type?

]]> ~LadyofDiamonds19 http://LadyofDiamonds19.deviantart.com/journal/10216104/ http://LadyofDiamonds19.deviantart.com/journal/10216104/ Thu, 28 Sep 2006 14:45:51 PDT .............................

Anywho I was wondering about the relationship between Thrawn and his mother, whom I will name Risa Nuruodo. What if his mother had hated and despised him as a child? She never raised a hand at him, but had treated him with contempt.

Thrawn feared and hated her as a child. Especially when she would lock him up inside a solitary room for two days straight without food or water to rethink his past actions.

Risa would be a cold woman. She doesn't yell, scream, or make a fuss, but she is venomously cold hearted. She is a supreme strategist with bitter words, knowing just what to say to get the response she wants out of her youngest son.

She blames Thrawn for the death of Thrass and basically tells him she would be glad if their people exiled him. Of course, she says all this in a matter-of-fact manner as she says everything to Thrawn in a matter-of-fact way.

Risa has a soft, gentle voice, and when she orders Thrawn to do something, she says it in the same way one would say "Let's eat lunch". It's her voice, gentle yet so cold and aloof, that Thrawn dreads most. Especially when she orders him to stay in the Room.

When he's around eight years old and almost an adult Chiss, he makes friends with a female named Ar'alani (yes, that SAME Ar'alani from OBF) who is an officer of the CEDF. He ends up respecting and adoring her. Ar'alani is the one who teaches him about the need to protect the Chiss. At first Thrawn isn't too keen on protecting the same species as his own mother, but gradually comes to love his race to a point that its--

"as though I am in love with a female" (probably won't make him say that, but I want to show that he REALLY loves the Chiss and will even break laws to save them)

He becomes increasingly passionate and theorizes that it would be better to make a preemptive strike than to allow an enemy to attack first.

However, the deep pit in the relationship between him and his mother grows ever deeper. His radical military doctrine and passions disgusts Risa. She continues to harass him subtly and unsubtly during his military career. Mostly in private where no one can see or hear.

Because Thrawn was psychologically abused as a child, his goal for the Skywalker twins was to protect and rear them away from their mother. He thinks Leia would be inadequate as a mother (plus she's a Rebel) and so he deems it best to take the twins away from her before she hurts or molds them into her way of thinking. Even Joruus C'baoth appears to make a better parent than Risa ever did.

Later, though, Thrawn ends up using the same method of torture and punishment his mother used on him for Talon Karrde.

I suppose you are wondering where Thrass fits in all this. Easy. Thrass was Risa's favorite and for many years he hated his younger brother or simply didn't care about him. Later though Ar'alani ends up bringing them much closer.

.............................................

This is all probably a load of Bantha dung that I probably will never write, but it was just a small idea I had and wanted to put it in this journal so I would never forget about it. Akito Sohma from Fruits Basket, Ren Sohma (Akito's mother), and various mothers from the shoujo manga Fruits Basket had a large influence in the idea of Risa Nuruodo.

Again I truly wish this was a private entry....

]]> ~LadyofDiamonds19 http://LadyofDiamonds19.deviantart.com/journal/10202501/ http://LadyofDiamonds19.deviantart.com/journal/10202501/ Wed, 27 Sep 2006 10:01:24 PDT

Anyway, I haven't worked on any new or old Thrawn fics in awhile and I've had multiple hypotheses on how Thrawn could have survived being stabbed in the heart by a knife.

Hypothesis #1: Chiss go through a state of death-like suspended animation while their vital organs heal themselves of wounds. Over the years of surviving on an ice planet, they have evolved (fictional standards, mind you) the ability to recuperate and heal from wounds that would kill normal people. However, since one can't tell whether one is dead or in suspended animation, Chiss are often buried alive by mistake or burned in ceremonial pyres. There is no way to tell a dead Chiss from a live one in that regard.

Hypothesis #2: A vampire was aboard the Chimaera and bit Thrawn, turning him into a vampire as well. Still thinking he is dead, his men ejects the casket ceremonially into space. The casket lands on a desert planet. Without any ships or way to contact civilization, Thrawn again lives a life of exile.

Hypothesis #3: That was just a clone. Thrawn survives elsewhere, or did until he tripped and fell down a couple thousand flights of steps.

Hypothesis #4: Thrawn is an alien with the physiology of an alien--the heart is where the lung/liver/stomach/squeedlyspooch is. But his men think he is dead and so his casket is ejected into the harsh blackness of space where he really does die.

Anyone willing to add to the list? Any Thrawnatics around?

]]> ~LadyofDiamonds19 http://LadyofDiamonds19.deviantart.com/journal/9759249/ http://LadyofDiamonds19.deviantart.com/journal/9759249/ Thu, 17 Aug 2006 11:57:47 PDT ]]> ~LadyofDiamonds19 http://LadyofDiamonds19.deviantart.com/journal/9737122/ http://LadyofDiamonds19.deviantart.com/journal/9737122/ Tue, 15 Aug 2006 12:56:38 PDT anntennae: and his ears were misshapen (they looked like blue leaves of lettuce). He also had some special Force powers.

It was like Timothy Zahn had gotten a call from George Lucas asking him to make Thrawn look more alien and have powers or something. Or to make his super-sweet and innocent, too.

Thrawn was also really friendly, sugar-sweet, and sickeningly lovey-dovey while being annoyingly macho. Let us all hope that never comes true! That'd be awful if Thrawn changed that much. I mean, a little white-washing is all right but that much is just horrible! *shudder* It was like he had become Barney. Y'know. That annoying purple dinosaur. Only, it was Barney mixed up with Superman. He could even shoot laser beams from his eyes...

He was so annoying!

I think I'll draw that now. ]]> ~LadyofDiamonds19 http://LadyofDiamonds19.deviantart.com/journal/9736649/ http://LadyofDiamonds19.deviantart.com/journal/9736649/ Tue, 15 Aug 2006 12:20:04 PDT
Someone suggested drawing the human skeleton and using that as a basis for art. I just feel I'd be so confused drawing all those bones. Then again, I've never tried so what can I say?

Lately all my images have been Thrawn or Chiss related. I hope no one minds. I feel a tad bit guilty that basically all new art has something to do with my fandom. And I never portray them in the best way it seems. I'm just such a total sucker for the Goth look...

All my Thrawn fics have Gothic elements in them, too. Though, he never wears a trenchcoat or stuff like that. It's just that those fics have vampires, spirits, and usually a dark aura around them. Even though I usually portray him as an anti-hero my Thrawn fics usually end up dark for some stange reason. Now that I think of it that might be because Thrawn somewhat resembles Klaha with blue skin and red eyes in my minds eye. Also, I like Goth symphonic rock (Nightwish, Malice Mizer, Moi Dix Mois, Within Temptation, etc). And I like reading Gothic horror.

So...that might have something to do with it. Uh-oh. Random fangirly moment...

::SQUEE! THRAWN'S SO CUTE IN A TRENCH!!!!

End of fangirly squeeing moment. *clears throat* Honestly though, a trench would look good (then again, I just think trenches look good on just about everyone--"Hurray for trenches!" or something of that sort) on him. Imagine it accentuating his masculine figure and yet it would also look regal and...

*another fangirly moment moment (hold breath folks)*SQUEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEee eeeeeeeeeeee!!!!

Oh dear. I think I'd better stop thinking of Thrawn, lol.

I do want to post some stories on here. Though, I don't think they'll be the same ones from FF.net. If someone wants to read my stories there here' it is [link] I'd love to write more original stories. Right now, I like the prospect of the past being in the future yet keeping it still very futuristic with aliens and stuff. It'd be an odd twist, I think, for there to be a spring back of oldfashioned talk and doings in the future (and styles as well).

There. I stopped talking about Thrawn-kun....Uh-oh. I feel another fangirly thing coming on. Must. Submit. Entry. *submits*

Edit: Maybe I could make it a white trench with rank badge and everything. It'd look like the usual except with some moderate tweaking... ]]> ~LadyofDiamonds19 http://LadyofDiamonds19.deviantart.com/journal/9634058/ http://LadyofDiamonds19.deviantart.com/journal/9634058/ Mon, 07 Aug 2006 20:58:07 PDT
Tonight was the Women's Meeting or Women's Devotional at the fellowship hall. The guest speaker was a best friend of the pastor's wife. She, like the woman who had lost Donnie, had been a widow before (twice, in fact). So her devotional was why we go through bad things like that. It's so that we can comfort others who are going through the same things. It's so that we can give encouragement and rely upon the Lord.

I thought it was a really good devotional.

Another update: Dad and that person in his Sunday School class made up, so I'm happy about that. I think that person is still a Mason, but at least he isn't holding a grudge against my intermediate family. He even brought over homegrown tomatoes and some cucuumbers. I tomatoes... ]]> ~LadyofDiamonds19 http://LadyofDiamonds19.deviantart.com/journal/9494576/ http://LadyofDiamonds19.deviantart.com/journal/9494576/ Tue, 25 Jul 2006 21:01:53 PDT they (the deacons) decided that Dad wouldn't be given an official pastoral license.

Me: WTF?!?!?!

To top it off, last night a man I really liked from that church died (bled to death after coming home from successful emergency surgery). And he was an exmason, too. I liked Donnie. He was a very down to earth person, could make others smile, cheerful, friendly--but now he's gone. I feel sorry for his wife and grandkids.

Also, Wednesday there was something sour in the business meeting that made me really NOT want to be part of HHBC.

My family agrees that we won't join a church in a long time. We'll be "pew warmers" for a time until a certain church grabs our trust. ]]> ~LadyofDiamonds19 http://LadyofDiamonds19.deviantart.com/journal/9124246/ http://LadyofDiamonds19.deviantart.com/journal/9124246/ Tue, 20 Jun 2006 08:57:22 PDT Gyah...

Btw, I'm over the paranoia thing. Just ignore my last entry or let me die a slow death to ninety-two from embarrassment, okay?....

I'm a paranoid person and I acted like a complete baka back there. ]]> ~LadyofDiamonds19 http://LadyofDiamonds19.deviantart.com/journal/9109916/ http://LadyofDiamonds19.deviantart.com/journal/9109916/ Sun, 18 Jun 2006 21:34:21 PDT
Now, I usually pronounce Mitth'raw'nuruodo as Mith-RAW-new-roh-oh-do. And I just learned that Mithra is one of the names of Satan. I don't mean to do an OMG!!!!1111 or something like that, but I can't help but feel shocked. Am I being too sensitive? I'm not worshipping Satan if I like this character. It's just, if Timothy Zahn meant to use Mitth'raw as the first part of his character's full name, wouldn't he also base the character after Satan? Of course, I could just be making a mountain over a mole hill.... And I used to be a Sauron sympathizer/fangirl...

I think it's that, while I can understand naming something "bitter" or "crooked" it's another thing to name it DIRECTLY after the devil....

Maybe I'm just paranoid. ]]> ~LadyofDiamonds19 http://LadyofDiamonds19.deviantart.com/journal/8564494/ http://LadyofDiamonds19.deviantart.com/journal/8564494/ Sun, 23 Apr 2006 19:11:47 PDT
Then the plane crashes and its all over for the lost ones. It's a very good play and many people have gotten saved by watching it.

I'm really hoping God uses it.

After play practice, my family went to Dairy Queen only to find something shocking (misunderstanding)--we left the money at home so we drove home and didn't get to have any ice cream.

But I suspect my sister and her boyfriend are buying ice cream from Wal-Mart. Amber (my sister) says she doesn't know what Adam (her boyfriend) is planning. *to self*Please get mint ice-cream. *stops chanting*

I feel sort of bad for what I wrote in my last journal entry. I think I said far too much than I needed to say. I would have been just fine without saying that I was Goth. Now I'm sure my friends are terrified of me now.

*to self* Good work, JadedFire. Excellent move. Declaring to a group of Christian friends you were Goth. Wonderful. ]]> ~LadyofDiamonds19 http://LadyofDiamonds19.deviantart.com/journal/8554689/ http://LadyofDiamonds19.deviantart.com/journal/8554689/ Sat, 22 Apr 2006 20:24:38 PDT
However, I get a little tired of reading the same thing. A Texas beauty named Meg marries a man named Judd (ick!--I despise that name. *shudder*). Everything is light, sweet, and sappy. There is a light conflict and the author decides to put in an AMAZING tear-jerker. The end. Bleh.

I already know vampires aren't very wholesome material, but the Gothic Christian romance doesn't have to have vampires in it. It can have a mysterious, darker atmosphere while still being pleasing to the Lord.

Currently I'm working on a story with God in it and I'm trying to give it more of a quaint, dark, romantic, yet Gothic feel. Sunshine and flowers aren't for me. Just look at my Xanga site:

[link]


I like to keep in mind that not everything dark is evil. When the Bible spoke of darkness it was talking of spiritual darkness, not the visible darkness. I believe a darker, yet encouraging, atmosphere to a story would be a nice challenge.

I plan on writing the first Christian Gothic paranormal romance. It will be a challenge, but I'm all up for challenges. I get tired of seeing the same thing all the time. And for me, I want to do something else than copy the framework of someone else or try to be someone I'm not.

I am a Christian, a believer of the Lord Jesus Christ.

I am Goth. Not heavily Goth. But I am Goth.

As I stated before, my plan is to write the first Gothic Christian novel. I'm just tired of sunshine and pastel flowers. ]]> ~LadyofDiamonds19 http://LadyofDiamonds19.deviantart.com/journal/8538924/ http://LadyofDiamonds19.deviantart.com/journal/8538924/ Fri, 21 Apr 2006 08:15:18 PDT ~LadyofDiamonds19 http://LadyofDiamonds19.deviantart.com/journal/7932304/ http://LadyofDiamonds19.deviantart.com/journal/7932304/ Sat, 18 Feb 2006 08:08:03 PST
Ah, nice blessed snow! Some people hate it, but I think its beautiful (when seen from inside the house, lol). ]]> ~LadyofDiamonds19 http://LadyofDiamonds19.deviantart.com/journal/7763356/ http://LadyofDiamonds19.deviantart.com/journal/7763356/ Tue, 31 Jan 2006 16:37:39 PST
I Jesus Christ! When I didn't deserve it, He bled and died and was ressurrected and took away my sins so that when I die I'll go to heaven. So I'm very, very, very happyy!

I'm in the process of writing several stories with El Shaddai as main character. It's an experiment at the moment.

He's sooo sweet, awesome, holy, wonderful, magnifecent--I Him! ]]> ~LadyofDiamonds19 http://LadyofDiamonds19.deviantart.com/journal/7607893/ http://LadyofDiamonds19.deviantart.com/journal/7607893/ Sun, 15 Jan 2006 05:37:06 PST
My art is looking much better and my writing skills are better than normal. I blame it on God, lol. He's been so sweet to me lately. And for my birthday I'll be getting a Wacom tablet! *squeal* But, alas, it will be a very LATE b-present.

So I'm hopeful that I'll be able to improve even more through the tablet. The scans aren't looking too well. In fact, they look kind of poor unless I paintstakingly retouch them in PSP. ]]> ~LadyofDiamonds19 http://LadyofDiamonds19.deviantart.com/journal/7382796/ http://LadyofDiamonds19.deviantart.com/journal/7382796/ Thu, 22 Dec 2005 13:31:36 PST
However, I find I disagree on several things spoken of yesterday. God created all animals great and small to produce after their kind. This verse in Genesis which speaks of this is pertaining to the fact an alligator will not mate with a whale and have offspring that way, or the kangaroo won't give birth to a cow's calf. This verse, as far I know, doesn't say anything about animal breeding (the many breeds of dogs, for example) being a sin. I mean, aren't we breeding other dogs with dogs? Now, if we, say, took a dog and tried to mate it with cat then I will agree that it is a sin. The same goes for cats and all creatures. The multiple breeds of horses have been bred with horses.

This is natural. A dalmation dog may go to a beagle and mate. It doesn't go to a rabbit or a goat. A Persian cat and a Turkish Van can mate. But they are cats and their offsprings will be cats. I can then assume that the verse And God made the beast of the earth after his kind, and cattle after their kind, and every thing that creepeth upon the earth after his kind: and God saw that it was good. (Gen 1:25)--pertains to the fact animals will not intermingle with other species.

And God said, Let us make man in our image, after our likeness: and let them have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over the cattle, and over all the earth, and over every creeping thing that creepeth upon the earth. (Gen. 1: 26)

So God created man in his own image, in the image of God created he him; male and female created he them. (Gen. 1: 27)

And God blessed them, and God said unto them, Be fruitful, and multiply, and replenish the earth, and subdue it: and have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over every living thing that moveth upon the earth. (Gen. 1: 28)

Now, as far as I know these verses puts mankind together as a whole and doesn't label kinds. It doesn't say anything that white people should marry white people and black with black and yellow with yellow. If in the context of the verse it would be "All people reproduce after their own kind". But what I see is "Be fruitful, and multiply" (Gen. 1: 28) I don't see any mention about how whites should marry whites and whatnot. And I don't believe the problem with America is because of interracial marriages. That, too, was mentioned in the sermon of yesterday evening.

I was saddened so many people said, "Amen!" to that point. I felt like the Scriptures were being twisted and the rest of the sermon I couldn't hear. I was too shocked and horrified to think clearly. Everything became a dull haze.

Even my father said, "AMEN!" to that point in the sermon. Is there something I'm missing? Am I a liberal? Has interracial marriages really affected America? Is God displeased with America, not so much because of abortion and gay rights, but because "blacks marry whites and whites marry yellow"?

I just don't recall anything in the Bible at all that mentions different kinds of people reproducing after "their own kind". While the sermon was going on I was thinking What kind? Since when did the Bible say whites should marry whites and blacks should marry blacks? Aren't we all human beings? Aren't we all equal in the sight of God? I found the statements made illogical to the point of ludicrous.

Just because someone has different skin color doesn't mean that he/she is a different type of human or a different kind (in KJV the term "kinds" is translated as "species" so in reality Gen 1: 25 should read as the following And God made the beast of the earth after his species, and cattle after their species, and every thing that creepeth upon the earth after his species: and God saw that it was good.) of human.

I plan on discussing it with my dad sometime. And discussing the potential loss of a church member at the said church.

Me. And I don't feel any guilt about leaving that church, either. ]]> ~LadyofDiamonds19 http://LadyofDiamonds19.deviantart.com/journal/7218035/ http://LadyofDiamonds19.deviantart.com/journal/7218035/ Sun, 04 Dec 2005 07:06:43 PST
I wasn't feeling real close to God. Like I had run away from Him for so long that I found myself giving in to Satan's temptations and snares everywhere. I would like to be a better Christian and I'd really like to use this site for God's glory. If there is a Christian who is reading please remember me in your prayers. It's hard to be a good witness online.

I read several chapters in Psalms today and two chapters in Mark. I really want to try and reach out to God. I was glad to see He did have a message for me today in His Word. I know He always does, but today I noticed it more. I'd rather fall in love with Him than anyone else. I like Gackt, Klaha, etc--but what are they really? In a moment they could die and go into judgment. Like Kami-san from Malice Mizer.

I want so badly to be a good Christian--it gets hard when there are so many distractions. I know that God is with me in all things and I know the Bible says I'm a conquerer in all things through Him that loved me.

I know I'm not perfect, but I'm trying. ]]> ~LadyofDiamonds19 http://LadyofDiamonds19.deviantart.com/journal/7184780/ http://LadyofDiamonds19.deviantart.com/journal/7184780/ Wed, 30 Nov 2005 11:10:37 PST It's a lot better than Dark Revenge--no, the title was Blood Quest. That's right. See? I can't even remember the title!

My day so far has gone well. I read the third part of Fruits Basket. It was all right, but I found it to be boring at some points. I wanted to know more about Akito-san and Hatori-san. Instead it was mostly about Yuki and Kyo. T_T

I can't wait for Honda-san to meet Akito! Eeek! The suspense is killing me. Must...get...fourth...book. *reaches hand up for invisible book*

Amber (my sis) came home from work last night and me and Kendra (my younger sis--I'm a middle child) were all squealing over it.

Kendra: Hurry up and read it!

Me: Read it! Read it! Then I'll get to read it!

Amber: *laugh* All right, you two. (or something to that extent)

I really enjoy being here in private. I hope no one from my other site hangouts notice me. I want to remain anonymous as long as possible. If you recognize me please pretend you don't know me! It would make me feel better!

Nevermind.

I'm happy that at least Amber is feeling better about working at the mall. She was really stressed out about Black Friday, but it went over smoothly. I'm so happy for her! She has so many friends--people that call her on the phone and then they talk for hours.

We were watching Batman Begins Monday and she was on the phone with a friend throughout more than half the movie. Yesterday she met a friend of hers from Xanga that she had never met before in person and they talked from six to closing time.

If I were to have a special friend, I'd want it to be someone I could trust. Someone who didn't mind my quirks and oddities. Someone who loved me for me--and not for what I do.

I'm the oldest teen at the church I go to. Kendra is the second oldest (she's seventeen--two years younger than I am). We are basically the only older teens there. The rest are young adults (ages thirty to forty-five) senior citizens, or little children.

I suppose I should be happy to be at a place where I learn about God, about how to be a better Christian--but I feel like something is missing. It must be the fact I miss my friends over at my other church before I left with my family. How I miss them all!

I really should be happy. I should feel blessed to be there--but I still long to be with my friends, I long for tender messages of love and acceptance. I was so close to God then.

Why did I leave God? I know He didn't leave me--I left Him. I wondered away like a stray sheep. He's calling for me to come back. I can feel it in my heart. Perhaps all I need is really Him. His love. His acceptance.

I read Mark today in my Bible. It was the second chapter. It was about Jesus healing the man sick of palsy, and then eating with publicans and sinners. It was good--but my mind kept drifting off. You know how it is. You've done that before while reading a book. ]]> ~LadyofDiamonds19 http://LadyofDiamonds19.deviantart.com/journal/7147878/ http://LadyofDiamonds19.deviantart.com/journal/7147878/ Sat, 26 Nov 2005 09:30:36 PST Sherlock Holmes in the 22nd Century fanfic that has something to do with Holmes being the ancestor of Camui Gackt. It sounds farfetched but I think it'll work.

My story Blood Quest is having some difficulties at the moment. I like Kamil so much and I like Niella. It's just I'm stumped on the third chapter. What should I write next? I have the scenes up, but how should I make Niella leave Tatooine? How is she going to help Sauron? How will they meet? Will there be a romance? You can see I didn't plan much on this story. ]]> ~LadyofDiamonds19 http://LadyofDiamonds19.deviantart.com/journal/7144757/ http://LadyofDiamonds19.deviantart.com/journal/7144757/ Fri, 25 Nov 2005 21:43:58 PST (all right, so I know my theory isn't true but I sure like putting it into some crossovers). I like Klaha from Malice Mizer. Malice Mizer is also my favorite Japanese band.

I was homeschooled most of my life and graduated last year (2004). I'm nineteen years old and still don't have my drivers' permit. I keep forgetting about that.

My life so far has been normal. No space aliens in the middle of the nights, etc. I own two cats, a brown, cream, and white striped one named Pickles and a little eight week old kitten named Peeps. Peeps is so cute!

I'm known to be the daydreamer of the family and have plans for either marriage or to stay single. Whichever one God wants I'd be satisfied with.

I like studying things like astronomy, cosmology (rather than prove evolution the study of space proves the supreme handiwork of God). I also like geology and oceanography.

My favorite thing to learn in school was history, though sadly I find I have to catch up on most things.

My least favorite subject was English, even though I like to write.

My favorite pastime is listening to J-rock and working on a story or practicing art or looking through DevianArt.

I also like reading books of all genres. I enjoy some Grace Livingston Hill romances, some Christian Inspirational romances, classics, dark romances with vampires, etc.

I am freakishly attracted by men who wear black lipstick (though they don't have to be Goth) and black eyeshadow/eyeliner. I also like black trenchcoats.

My denomination IS fundemental independant Baptist. I'm just weird.

I think I've babble long enough, lol. ]]> ~LadyofDiamonds19