http://search.deviantart.com/?q=by:LeLovelyZ&section=today deviantART RSS for by:LeLovelyZ en-us Copyright 2009, deviantART.com Tue, 24 Nov 2009 17:02:15 PST deviantART.com http://blogs.law.harvard.edu/tech/rss http://s.deviantart.com/minish/widgets/apple-touch-icon-precomposed.png http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/20869758/ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/20869758/ Tue, 07 Oct 2008 06:26:30 PDT [link]

There is me.
---------------------

I encourage open-mindedness and not excuses for bashing people over the head.
What is good art vs bad art?

Isn't what is "good" and "bad" just an opinion of the viewer?
Is it based on skill level? Because all beginners start out needing lots of improvement. I think one never stops improving their art. So should it be "good according to how many drawings one has made?". But who is to determine that scale?

What are the limits of art?
For example....aligning a stack of *random objects* together into something aesthetically pleasing to the "artist"? Or does it have to be a popular medium? i.e. painting.

Is it how much effort you put into your art? Some REALLY nice shots (to meh) were just spontaneous photographs that ended up aesthetically pleasing.

Oh...is aesthetically pleasing the definition of art? I draw a lot of things that are absolutely ugly to other people. Amputees, burn victims, usually things that remind them of death (something I think isn't taken seriously enough in society but that's a really long story and it will probably offend you a lot), distorted features...etc. None of that stuff is aesthetically pleasing to a lot of people, but when I look at them I think they're gorgeous.
I don't think that's the definition...

I also don't take what is and what isn't art very seriously.
I am curious of what everyone thinks...I've heard some pretty harsh things..."People who draw anime are not artists." That's stupid. I don't like anime either (with exceptions) but why is drawing big eyes/tiny noses/spiky hair much different than other cartoon characters"? Well I know its just a response to immense (and yes...annoying but we have ways of ignoring it) popularity.

]]> ~LeLovelyZ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/20072926/ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/20072926/ Thu, 21 Aug 2008 06:44:30 PDT I am extremely enthusiastic about it...I just bought $200 worth of art supplies. My art teacher is extremely enthusiastic about drawing...she's been drawing for 50 years. She really emphasizes creativity, improvement, and personal style. That is all good and dandy but I heard art teachers have biases towards students' drawing styles.

She draws a ton of murals ..and you know...murals consist of about a billion things...they take up the entire blank space they are given. Really colorful and gorgeous murals.

Since I am a portrait photographer, I love drawing portraits of people.

I have an obsession with making ugly things pretty and pretty things ugly. My drawings scare the shit out of a lot of people. But they are simplistic in a way since I only draw the person and maybe a prop or two but not much else. Of course I'm not drawing the same fashion model on every page. That wouldn't be a style? (I don't draw fashion models. If its a "pretty girl" she ends up being a burn victim or an amputee or she gets something that would be considered "ugly" to society... There are a lot of pretty burn victims and amputees out there. Alrighty?)

Anyways my worry is that she might grade me down for being so simplistic. Sooo it will be a challenge to add complicated backgrounds and stuff and still have the picture focus on my person. Or yeti.

]]> ~LeLovelyZ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/20024575/ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/20024575/ Mon, 18 Aug 2008 14:37:08 PDT Here is a record (before they possibly delete it)
of some dumbass comment I got.


I edited a picture of Diana in MY STYLE.
I posted the before and after.
Of course I expect comments which like and don't like. I just care if Diana likes it or not.


no1chrism Pro User says:

Sorry, I need to be honest, I prefer the original. I think it is overdone a little. I really don't like making negative comments, but I've had a shitty day at work and just felt like saying what I felt.

Chris


ME:

Okay just because you had a shitty day, doesn't mean the rest of the world should be affected. I'm sorry you had a shitty day but I don't want to see the result of it, since I don't know you and don't really care.

I don't expect my work to please everyone...do you expect me to please everyone? Why are you just reminding me that my work doesn't please everyone? No piece of artwork does. I made the picture for my friend and she likes it. I like it too.


Okay I checked out your photostream. It is your style to keep things "natural." It is not my style to keep things natural regarding tones and colors. Get over it and don't take out your frustration on me because of something that has nothing to me!

]]> ~LeLovelyZ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/19450316/ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/19450316/ Thu, 17 Jul 2008 16:53:59 PDT [link]


Anyone have an account on twilightlexicon?



p.s.......

[link]

]]> ~LeLovelyZ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/19432428/ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/19432428/ Wed, 16 Jul 2008 17:24:37 PDT My attempt at high fashion minus any makeup skills or hair styling skills. GRRRRRRRRR. If I had access to a good hair/makeup artist I will go INSANE! And you would see a gazillion more pictures from me.

Sadly the lens I bought off Diana cracked!!!
The damage is quite noticable, but I used it to my advantage. ^^
You will see when I upload the pictures onto my flickr...probably tomorrow. >< Goddddddd I really liked that lens...

]]> ~LeLovelyZ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/19245297/ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/19245297/ Sun, 06 Jul 2008 23:56:41 PDT
For literally half a year, I have barely been taking pictures.
It's extremely frustrating after this long of being uninspired.

I'm not even sure I could do this for a living.
I've been fooling myself by telling myself that eventually I will gain some people skills. This sounds really negative but there are some people who go into adulthood not being able to connect very well with other people and who honestly do not enjoy the presence of random people. That is a terrible personality to have if you have to deal with people day in and day out and if you can't communicate very well. Social situations make me extremely nervous all the time. I've just been expecting myself to change eventually but I'm pushing myself away from social situations more and more.


I am very reserved and my head is floating around in books all day...most often books about science. I am extremely interested in black holes and string theory and whatnot. I don't like having a hectic schedule, which goes along with the photography career.

I'm not making excuses, I'm just being realistic.
I enjoy photography when I'm actually inspired. I worry about making a living off something that forces me to have a constant flow of creativity.
I promise you, when I get my hands on more money (I have a job which lasts a couple days to a week and I'll end up with 70 dollars or so) I will be much more creative because when I think about my lack of money I get very frustrated and I lose any creative spark that I start to pick up.


Jesus Christ... I'm terrible at articulating.

Yes...I'm expecting people to try to make easy solutions for me such as suggesting that I go to thrift stores and find some cute outfits there that I can use for my photography. But nothing is that simple. It doesn't fix the fact that I'm probably too anti-social to make a living in the fashion photography industry, too uninspired to create much of anything in 6 months, that I'm terrible at marketing my work....etc. That I would actually enjoy being a scientist.... I'm saying goodbye to a unrealistic career and hello to a career I am more content with, not saying goodbye to photography altogether.

]]> ~LeLovelyZ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/18914838/ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/18914838/ Wed, 18 Jun 2008 15:38:04 PDT
]]> ~LeLovelyZ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/18677895/ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/18677895/ Thu, 05 Jun 2008 11:10:58 PDT [link]



Even though she lives in Montana and I live in California (Bay Area which is the area around San Francisco and whatnot) she still came to see me via Greyhound bus. She suffered through her bus breaking down for two hours, weird/annoying people sitting next to her, an asshole bus driver (just on one of them), hmm...and my moms car battery dying! LOL. Geez. O_O


Well....before we even met, we knew eachother (online) for maybe a year or so. And of course we could confirm that neither of us were creepy 50 year old men. Annnd we realized how incredibly similar we are to eachother.


Soooo during her stay we (in order):

1. Thursday night: Went to eat Mexican food.

2. Friday morning through afternoon: Had a photoshoot

3. Friday evening: Helped my boyfriend do his physics project in my studio

4. Saturday morning: Surprised her by taking her to a "Lace Museum" which is full of Victoriany goodness....dresses and whatnot. Its a sewing/looking at awesome historical dresses store/museum. Then we went to an antique shop, and we both got offered a job after talking to the guy for a while. But she lives in Montana...poo....so I got the job. I got a photography job, making him business cards and also I clean up his shop once a week.

5. Saturday afternoon: Took her to a sewing store (we are both interesting in sewing as well as corsets and Victorianygoodness) and I bought a sewing book. WEEEEEE!

6. Saturday afternoon: Took her to eat Mexican food...again...except this time the restaurant was a million times better and we stuffed ourselves soooooooooooooooooo much.

7. Saturday afternoon: I bought an external flash for my camera! It was 300 dollars!!!!!!!!!! DAMN.

8. Sunday afternoon: Took her and my mom and my boyfriend to see Baby Mama at the San Francisco Metreon (gigantic shopping center/theater). I didn't expect it to be fantastic but it had Tina Fey and Amy Poehler. It was pretty funny. ^^

9. Sunday afternoon: Went to the Asian Art Museum in SF. We went towards the end of the day so it closed before we could get to the second floor.

10. Monday afternoon: Did my photography job (she was my lighting assistant...awwww how nice of her. <3) and I still didn't finish. I'm going to finish next week.

11. Monday afternoon: My moms car battery died in the middle of Berkeley. Luckily we pulled over at an ATM so we could give Diana cash because i bought her lens/lipgloss. LOL. Triple A came pretty quickly. ^^ Under 20 minutes.

12. Monday evening: Took her to the Greyhound station and said goodbye. WAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. T~T

Diana: Did I miss anything? ^^

We are making plans for her to come back in August. Early to middle August because we are both busy at the end of August. We are going to have many, many, more photoshoots. ^^ And she is not going to forget that her ISO is on 1600 before any of the photoshoots. ^^

]]> ~LeLovelyZ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/18323459/ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/18323459/ Wed, 14 May 2008 16:00:28 PDT
Its just obnoxious when people point out in a picture "Shes skinny"...or people point out "I really like this picture but shes sooo skinny" like her thinness is the thing that is preventing you from liking the picture more. Its just as bad as people not liking pictures because the model is overweight.

Or pictures where the ribs stick out for artistic effect. Ribs NEVER glamorize a person so why the hell are you complaining about them? Just because they exist and you don't like being reminded that there are people skinnier than you?

Or you may say "I don't care I love my body! I'm glad I'm not that skinny. This model is too skinny". Then why is it even an issue? Its just like me saying "I like this picture but his eyes are not asian enough." I prefer asian eyes but just because something exists that doesn't belong in my list of preferences doesn't mean it has to be an issue.

Artistic non-commercial pictures which feature skinny girls are not giving promoting the message "thin is better". Commercial pictures (a lot of the time) promote looks and ideas of perfection but that is not the intention of artistic non-commercial pictures. Have you noticed that the vast majority of the people you see in commercials are white? They're promoting whiteness just like they are promoting thinness. Does that mean you should be bitter when you see pictures of white people? What I'm trying to say is...SAME CONCEPT.

Beauty comes in all shapes and sizes and its never confined to one body type...EVER. Yes....I may have a tiny waist but I will never have Beyonce type curves...its literally impossible unless I gain a lot of weight...but I can't gain weight even if I try..theres ups and downs to every body type.

]]> ~LeLovelyZ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/18277426/ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/18277426/ Sun, 11 May 2008 17:07:59 PDT ..................................................................................................
..................................................................................................
..................................................................................................
..................................................................................................
use your very imaginative mind to figure out what I would do next.


but then again why do I care so much?
Hmmm..........................
PEER PRESSURE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



We all know who started the trend and actually I quite like the original, so I'm not insulting her.

Hmmm it reminds me of my old school. Literally almost my entire school of 400 people all shopped at the SAME DAMN STORES at the mall. "urban" is the less offensive way of putting it. I just call it ghetto-fied.....I saw the same hoodie on about 5-6 people. O_O That drove me insane after a while. Similar hairstyles....makeup styles....shoes...shirts....

*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Copy the popular artists on DA..I don't care.
Just never expect to gain their popularity. EVER.
That is all.

Remember kids, drugs are bad and praise Allah.

]]> ~LeLovelyZ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/18211756/ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/18211756/ Fri, 09 May 2008 08:22:53 PDT
Sweeeeeet. She is coming to my house for sure. Our mommies talked it out and whatnot.
I'm starting to plan some ideas for our photoshoot.... we'll probably have more than one. (p.s. she is fucking gorgeous and has awesome/photogenic hair) Sooo I'll be finally modeling for someone else! ^^

She'll be staying at my house from the 30th of May to the 2nd of June. ^_________^



So remember kids, drugs are bad and praise Allah.


_______________________________________________________
You may or may not know...

[link]

is my bestest pally in the world (online friend)
We are extremely similar in literally a million ways.
She used to live closer (So Cal) but now she moved to Montana...however...distance is not stopping us from having a photoshoot . W00T!!!!!!!!!!
Well it might.....its very possible that she is going to visit me at the end of May.


go to her flickr it has more stuff on it:

[link]

Also...if you haven't been to my flickr in a while:

[link]

Away you go!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

]]> ~LeLovelyZ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/17622798/ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/17622798/ Tue, 01 Apr 2008 06:25:36 PDT

Anyways...
its early in the morning and everyone is awake.
Still I will manage before they go to locate some newspaper in the house and stuff it in their shoes....so they think that they are too small for their shoes. "Why don't my shoes fit???" Bwahahahahahaaha. I do this every fucking year and sometimes I tell them and laugh at their faces but they still don't remember. Poor family. Hehehehehehe.

Okay I have more practical jokes.
I just got a bb gun the other day.
Anyone who comes to my house....I will be waiting for them with the gun at my head....
"OH MY GOD WHAT THE FUCK! PUT THAT DOWN!"
"No." *evil grin*
*pulls the trigger* *little popping noise*


.....that is very cruel....i hope.
Obviously my bb gun is not loaded...XD

]]> ~LeLovelyZ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/17507791/ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/17507791/ Tue, 25 Mar 2008 11:12:13 PDT
2. Generally being bitter towards humanity. My boyfriend/select few are the only ways I can escape all the things I hate about human nature.

3. Wishing I could be taking pictures....

4. Going to the beach and getting sunburned on the back of my legs. Sweet.

5. Calling my brother "Cast-y" and being his armrest for his broken arm

6. Getting beaten by my brothers cast

7. Getting in trouble when I fight back because my brother is a cripple. *sigh*

8. Forgetting that most people don't understand my sense of humor and that I really really really have nothing against cripples.

9. Getting pushed around in shopping carts in Target.

10. Going to the mall to get my PROM SHOES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Zomg! Yes! I'm going to prom! I'm so excited! Its going to be kick ass and its going to suck at the same time!

Its going to be kickass because I get to dance with my boyfriend in a cute dress that I will keep forever. And I get to see him in a suit or something. And I get to see two other people who I love (my friends Jennifer and Brandon).

Its going to suck because the music is going to be a ton of rap/r&b. And highschoolers are incapable of not creating drama at these things.........and there are retarded people who might be there who don't like me for literally no fucking reason.


pssst. These are my shoes:
[link]

I found them at the mall...not amazon.

They are going to last for literally one night. They are muy cheap. XD

And this is my dress:

[link]

I know its not very prom-y. But I don't take prom very seriously.

]]> ~LeLovelyZ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/17227272/ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/17227272/ Fri, 07 Mar 2008 16:00:10 PST

I am going through a slight lack-of-inspiration block which I am slowly recovering from. I am now starting to sketch up ideas for photoshoots. They're insane. As in psychotic insane. Or just plain weird. Sweet.

Unfortunately I don't have the clothes for them and due to the $800 tv/dvd/vhs set we bought (our old tv which was as old as me died and the dvd player died as well) we seriously don't have any money for photoshoots. Hmmmm Good Will...here I come! Except its really hard to find what I'm looking for in Good Will or Thrift Town.


Ummmm college is really using up a lot of my time (photoshoot time).
At least 3 hours of homework for 3/4 of my classes.
But...... my schedule is extremely flexible and I spend way less time in class than any high schooler. And I have a longer time to finish my homework. It all works out.

]]> ~LeLovelyZ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/16779103/ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/16779103/ Fri, 08 Feb 2008 02:21:06 PST
picture of him here and other places on my flickr:
[link]

And I think I'll model next to him.
And I have this really great picture idea with a really great (actually psychotic but that doesnt stop it from being great in my opinion) concept..........but it involves holding me holding my knife (not butcher knife but switchblade thingy) up to his neck. (the knife wont be the only prop)

concept: children playing "Grownup".....only adults are capable of intentionally murdering other humans. Children experiencing complex grownup urges (urge to kill) is an interesting concept to me. and i haven't really seen that in photographs or heard of it in real life. I'm going to add childlike qualities to Brennan and myself because using actual children to model would just be highly offensive to most people.



Anyways.......I have a few parents looking at my flickr. Some probably won't "understand" art as well as the others (like Angelo's mom...she is SUPER cool and she is into macabre art).

Most people (and parents) who "know" me think I'm a bit strange. I'm debating whether I should follow through with this concept or not. If I am.... then the picture next to it will be me and Brennan and his giant stuffed Pokemon (Pokemon...PLURAL) as a feeble attempt to prove that I'm not disturbed by capitalizing on the innocence of cartoon character plushies. XD


By the way........I have a million things going on in my life.
If you care to hear I think I'll devote a post to the most interesting things happening.

]]> ~LeLovelyZ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/16411842/ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/16411842/ Tue, 15 Jan 2008 02:03:48 PST
[link]

Brennan's real name is Jitsutaro... how fucking cool is that? ^_^

Next photoshoot with him I am planning on it being über gothy/victorian-y and I will pose with him in my dress which I am getting VERY soon. It might be on the U.C. Berkeley campus. There are some very photogenic places on the Berkeley campus. Omg there are some amazing buildings that are...dun dun dun......frat houses! O_O Hmmm. And my mom told me that the frat boys might let me borrow their building for photoshoots. Hahahahaa. Hilarious. I don't know if she's serious or not. But I think I'll decline. Frat boys seriously freak me out. Whenever I pass by their buildings they are drunk and hanging off the balcony.

[link]

^That's my dress btw. Angelo's mom bought it for me as a Christmas present. Soooooooooo nice of her! ^^

]]> ~LeLovelyZ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/16361102/ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/16361102/ Fri, 11 Jan 2008 17:24:54 PST
]]> ~LeLovelyZ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/16337623/ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/16337623/ Wed, 09 Jan 2008 23:33:22 PST
I don't start school until the 17th. All my highschool friends are in school already. Awww. So today I went to the plaza at 7:30 in the morning. I sat in Starbucks until 9 ish. Then I wandered around...bought some gum...and went between Barnes and Noble and Pure Beauty. Wtf I am so boring I went into Bed Bath and Beyond and carefully examined all the vaccuum cleaners!!!!! The lady from Pure Beauty *a makeup shop* was nice to me and she gave me a ton of free makeup samples.

I met up with my old best friend and her boyfriend. Then we met up with my ex and his friends and they were starting a fight club behind Ross. It is soooooo hilarious because him and his friend are the two most scrawniest people ever. And you can't kick his ass because you can't stop laughing.

Sooo ummm fight club on saturday. WEEEEEEEEE. Its not that bad because all it is, is a bunch of skinny little teenagers who don't know how to fight, punching eachother in the chest. ahhahahahahaha. I could be doing much much worst. Like napalming squirrels for fun and taking dumps in random corners of Albertsons or doing drugs........god i am so crude. My crudeness is a desperate attempt at preserving my childhood, if i haven't told you before.

well goodnight.
photoshoot with brennan tomorrow.

]]> ~LeLovelyZ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/16271366/ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/16271366/ Sat, 05 Jan 2008 13:58:15 PST All my other friends probably think I am ignoring them because I haven't been returning peoples texts/calls or going online very often. I've been very busy.

Very busy watching millions of movies, making out in maple syrup, and talking for literally 30-40 minutes straight about "hand eyes" and "back eyes". Like if you had an eyeball on your hand...or a realllly tiny tentacle coming out of your back with an eyeball attached at the end. I say that "back eye" is way more convenient than "hand eye" but my friend says the opposite and we argued for about 40 minutes on the subject. We concluded that "asshole eye" is the most useless type of eye. You are forced to see the inside of your ass all day and when you want to see outside, you have to drop your pants and spread your cheeks and that is veryyyyyy inconvenient especially if you are trying to be inconspicuous.


I warned you I am weird. >__________<

]]> ~LeLovelyZ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/16199077/ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/16199077/ Tue, 01 Jan 2008 02:53:08 PST I have been taking gazillions of pictures with it and sending them to all my friends.
Mwahahahahahahaha.

I feel like I'm the only person who stayed sober for New Years.
Sigh.
Who reading this stayed sober as well?


New years resolutions:

1. avoid contact with any known necrophiliacs
2. make new friends in college
3. avoid talking shit about a certain someone on deviantart even if they are incredibly vain and myspace-y.......oops too late. damn it.
4. get abs. (my friend Angelo and Kyo from Dir En Grey are my inspirations.)
5. see Dir En Grey (also backstage!) and then hit on Kyo... XD
6. model for other people
7. meet up with my bestest friend Diana in real life and have a photoshoot with her (model for her and photograph her)
[link]



I should have about a million more.
But I never keep them.
Ughhh what should I add to the list?




tell me yours!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

]]> ~LeLovelyZ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/16103270/ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/16103270/ Wed, 26 Dec 2007 01:20:39 PST But this December, due to a $2,000 house payment my mom had to make, Christmas just seemed like a big waste of money. We have no family to spend Christmas with..

I have a sister, a niece, 2 uncles with no kids, 2 grandmothers both about to die, an aunt and a cousin..and then there is my mom, me and my brother. That is my entire family right there! Sad.

So I told my mom to not waste her money on a 40 dollar tree and use the 40 dollars to pay for a couple of books. This year Christmas didn't mean crap to me except getting a few books, magazines, and makeup. And ohhhh if the guy who really likes you just so happens to have a lot of money then a couple of clothing items, dvds, and frequent trips to the movies!

The best part of Christmas was:
Going to this GIANT parking lot with virtually no cars and skating with my little brother!!!!!!!! On Christmas, none of the stores are open so we skated in the parking lot/on the sidewalks without running into any cars or pedestrians. NICE.

]]> ~LeLovelyZ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/16004845/ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/16004845/ Wed, 19 Dec 2007 18:17:35 PST
My solution is to never take a single look at that forum again and let them bitch. Why should they piss me off? I'm not going to let them.

Most people in this world suck. Tis very true. But they can go suck somewhere else........anywhere else.....all the sucky people on this earth shouldn't concern me. So if you suck I'm just going to ignore you. Yay.

]]> ~LeLovelyZ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/15787128/ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/15787128/ Mon, 03 Dec 2007 23:32:44 PST
I have 2.5 weeks left of highschool.
I'll make the most of it by taking a shitload of pictures of me and my friends. and doing random, insane acts around my school. like putting soap all over the wall so people can look up and wonder "how on earth did the soap get up there?"

Photoshoot with Angelo this weekend! I have some really good ideas.

]]> ~LeLovelyZ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/15770894/ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/15770894/ Sun, 02 Dec 2007 20:08:05 PST Besides the obvious, what is so great about being socially acceptable?

XD

]]> ~LeLovelyZ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/15608161/ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/15608161/ Wed, 21 Nov 2007 16:12:51 PST Which means
1.) I have the equivalent of a highschool diploma
2.) I am starting college in January
3.) I do not have to worry about being shot. (Because my school is in one of the worst neighborhoods in one of the worst places in California.)
4.) I am leaving my school within the next week
5.) No more PRE-CALCULUS which is a waste of my brain
6.) No more seeing my friends which makes me very sad, but I have a future to pursue.
7.) No more getting shit for being a so called "scary goth kid". LOL. Well...less shit. I guess.
8.) More time for photoshoots if I'm going to be a bum at home!
9.) Time for a job so I can buy props, clothing, and camera related stuff.
10.) mmmmmmmmmmmmm.........................waffles


go to my flickr damn you!

[link]

]]> ~LeLovelyZ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/15361223/ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/15361223/ Sun, 04 Nov 2007 11:59:45 PST I'm afraid I will start seeing "Zeynep Is A Bitch" hate sites. LOL.
I am a very nice person. And very quiet too. But if you seriously insult me, I will not hesitate to be a total bitch.

For the longest time..I was a very passive person. People would literally insult me to my face and I would just stare at them...not knowing what to say. It was very pathetic. O_O So now, I am trying to be much more assertive......even if people hate me...*shrugs*


Ohhh to see Halloweeny goodness go to my flickr! ^_^


my OHMYFUCKINGGOD moment of the week.
Some chick sent me a message on my flickr with around 184 lines!
W.......T..........F.
I tried reading some of it. There is no way I can read it all. She mostly talks about herself? If any of you would like to see the 184 lines of insanity then message me. LOL.

]]> ~LeLovelyZ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/14997945/ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/14997945/ Wed, 10 Oct 2007 09:55:15 PDT

Now the "mature filter" is not optional. i have to wait 2 years until I can switch it on. There are so many good photos that have slight (or half) nudity in them... or blood *which has to have a mature filter on* and now I can't see them anymore. What are they trying to do? Protect me? From evil boobies!?!? And evil fake blood?

fuck you deviantart. >____________<
I'm not a child. Its not like I go to the artistic nude section and start drooling or become scarred for life. I want to choose my content...not my age. Age shouldn't have everything to do with maturity level.

]]> ~LeLovelyZ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/14989527/ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/14989527/ Tue, 09 Oct 2007 17:59:09 PDT
Me: "Do you know where Erick is?"
Zoe: *doodling on her sketch pad* "I don't know, I'm drawing lips".

Zoe: Sean Kingston is getting pretty annoying. With that song "Beautiful Girls."
Me: Hmm............who's that? Does he have wide-set eyes?





Also.........
Go here or your mother will die in 3 days:


[link]

Gosh don't you hate chain letters like that?

Really bad responses:
Erm....no......I LOVE THEM! I DON'T WANT MY MOM TO DIE IN 3 DAYS I MUST CLICK ON THAT LINK AND THEN SEND IT TO 30 PEOPLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

MY MOTHER DIED IN A CAR ACCIDENT 5 YEARS AGO! *sobs*

]]> ~LeLovelyZ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/14956590/ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/14956590/ Sun, 07 Oct 2007 13:36:08 PDT
1. School is a bitch. A stupid whiny bitch. College will be much more exciting. And I am almost positive I'm graduating early. I got some signatures and all I need is an id.

2. Zoe is my main model. <3 And me. But I prefer to work with Zoe. She is knee deep in essays *6!!!!! thats a lot of essays* so I can't have photoshoots with her until they are all done.

3. I got my Alice In Wonderland costume. It is quite short. Its shorter than my shortest shorts. So I have to wear a skirt underneath as well as my shorts. makes it look quite shitty but I guess its so people wont think I am a baby prostitute.

4. Lunch time is getting better. They made it longer and me and my friends actually do things besides sit around and throw food at eachother! We talk about really disgusting and/or perverted things. And occasionally we talk philosophy. But mostly shit like:

"What if when your cherry gets popped, it makes a giant booming noise like when something breaks the sound barrier? HAHAHAHAHA"

And ..um..they suggested that if the apocalypse happens you should go hide in a fat girl's girly parts and then travel up to her stomach and hide in there. I have no idea how that works out. Umm yeah they are fucking gross. Gross gross gross. But hilarious.

5. All I do nowadays is listen to Dir En Grey and do homework and read.

6. I might possibly have connections with photoshoot locations because my friend's dad owns a hotel. Its a pretty nice one. So i have no idea. probably not. but its a tiny possibility. And when my mom is not lazy she will bring me to this little town with abandoned buildings and train tracks. Sweet.

]]> ~LeLovelyZ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/14433622/ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/14433622/ Fri, 31 Aug 2007 23:08:43 PDT

I forgot how long lunch was in 10th grade...probably about 45 minutes. It was pretty fun..there was no more use of ducttape. My group of friends got smaller as my school got lamer. I'd skateboard A LOT at lunch. My school is tiny so there would be a tiny little yard that people would play soccer AND football on at the same time. It was either that or football and basketball. Or sometimes they did all three. seriously.

Lunch is now 30 minutes long. Waiting to get the shitty lunch *we don't have a cafeteria we get served lunch in a portable and we get it in aluminum foil* takes about 20 minutes so I don't eat lunch. I have started losing weight because of it. I stopped skateboarding (not allowed at school damn them) but I'll probably bring my board anyways.


My friends like to play this game of sneaking up on me and then suddenly picking me up and then they pass me back and forth between everyone. Or they spin me around on their backs so my body is parallel to the ground and its like I'm flying and apparently when you are observing this, it's hilarious. LMFAO. Or sometimes I'm just talking to someone and they come up behind me and steal me away and run with me all the way across the yard. HAHAHAHAAHA. >____<

And when we get bored we run up to people and glomp them.


btw my school sucks nads. I'm trying to graduate early (many reasons) and they are trying to stop me.

]]> ~LeLovelyZ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/14289314/ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/14289314/ Wed, 22 Aug 2007 14:04:30 PDT I'm very happy that she told me that she likes modeling (despite that our photoshoots take place in cold weather but its supposed to be warm this weekend). I'm still trying to decide if I should be a model with her. That would require me to go through the slight embarassment of passing by people, with a large camera, a tripod, in really elaborate dressy clothing with a model wearing something similar. Hehe. Its a sacrafice...for art. YEAH! ^_______^ *pumps fist into air*

The graveyard is huuuuuge and it has boring headstones as well as really old, 7 ft tall statues and really interesting headstones. The ideal place for a photoshoot is in the old section of the graveyard. I haven't been to that graveyard in a million years, so I have no idea how I'll find my way around the place.


My flickr subscription is about to run out. Meep. Some nice guy, almost a year ago bought it for me...randomly. I'm trying to pester my mom about it, but i feel bad because I'm already pestering her about Netflix (which we are sure to get, but she keeps on putting it off.)

Once I get access to a big tank (not the kind that blasts holes through walls), or a pool, my friend Arielle is going to model for me submerged in water. She really likes the idea. XD I know you can get tanks at the vivarium ..like for the really big turtles.

Go to my flickr. I updated recently and later on in the evening, I'll update again with pictures from the photoshoot I'm about to have right now.

Evilwaffleyness:

[link]

Hahahahah this is so me...if I were a horse. O_O
[link]

]]> ~LeLovelyZ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/14092240/ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/14092240/ Thu, 09 Aug 2007 14:55:34 PDT Phangs : hi
bigblueeyes005: hi.
Phangs : i'm kevin's friend
Phangs :
bigblueeyes005: Why hello Kevins friend! ^^
bigblueeyes005 : wait......
bigblueeyes005 : Kevin who?
Phangs : i dunno his last name i play final fantasy with him lol
bigblueeyes005: yeah he is obsessed with that game.
Phangs : indeed
Phangs: i stopped playing recently cause im awesome, wanna make out?
bigblueeyes005 : hell fucking no. *Throws a cookie at Phangs*
Phangs:
bigblueeyes005: lol im taken. ^^
Phangs: so?
bigblueeyes005: so now you get pelted with cookies
bigblueeyes005: stale cookies
Phangs : oh well
Phangs: so wanna make out
bigblueeyes005: no!!!!! *throws piranas at Phangs*
Phangs: you know in my country piranas are an aphrodisiac
Phangs: *wink*
bigblueeyes005: did i tell you I'm a 92 year old woman? you don't want to make out with me.
Phangs: ok well im a 92 year old man
bigblueeyes005: i prefer older men.
Phangs: seems like we are meant for each other
bigblueeyes005: psh. you are not older than me. goodbye.

]]> ~LeLovelyZ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/13694052/ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/13694052/ Wed, 11 Jul 2007 10:20:46 PDT this Saturday *july 14 until the 28th

I am terribly addicted to the internet so I will be in lots of pain leaving my baby. *hugs computer and sniffles*

Oh yeah....huge update on my flickr. Go. Now.

[link]


At the moment I am trying to teach myself Quantum mechanics through wikipedia. lol.

Also I am getting the hell out of Richmond (CA) by graduating early. I'm going to take some test in October. But I'm going to stay at school until I get a job. And then I will be going to community college for two years and then I shall go here:

[link]

Where they have the most KICKASS photography program.
People are always trying to convince me to go to a cheaper and supposedly "better" school but I'm like "Fuck that, their photography program sucks donkey ears."

]]> ~LeLovelyZ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/13612204/ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/13612204/ Thu, 05 Jul 2007 09:32:10 PDT
That's her:
[link]


I hung around lots of famous people and special effects people who worked on the Transformers movie...

Photoshoot with Zoe on Saturday!
w00t.

kay..thats whats new with me...

whats new with you?


edit:


hahahahah he was wearing this exact same shirt at the picnic:

[link]


I was one of the 2,400 people there. ^^ ]]> ~LeLovelyZ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/13431756/ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/13431756/ Thu, 21 Jun 2007 11:01:39 PDT
]]> ~LeLovelyZ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/13339097/ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/13339097/ Thu, 14 Jun 2007 06:51:03 PDT I've liked modeling since...forever...
When I was 10, my friend Martina liked to take pictures of me with her dad's film slr camera and it was so much fun. Hehe.

I just don't like candid photos. I always screw up my face. And oh god...I look soooooooooooo bad in my yearbook. It doesn't even look like me. My eyes are bugging out of my head, my face lost all symmetry, and I gave the goofiest, ugliest smile. And now i get made fun of. Its my first real yearbook I've ever had (which by the way is the lamest yearbook in the history of all yearbooks but at least they actually got out a yearbook this year.)


Lots of photographers these days are like
"Okay, two hundred dollars for 200 pictures of you from 11am to 4pm, 20 different looks..." or something like that.

I know..they need money...but if I ever model for people (not professionally) I won't want to pay hundreds of dollars that I don't have. I'd contribute ideas+I'll be the subject of your picture+contribute to your portfolio possibly. But I don't have money to make good pictures for you. Its free making good pictures for me! lol. Yeah yeah...I'm really selfish. I just don't have $$$. Well...I wouldn't pay money for amateur photographers. Wow...that sounds bitchy...

Actually I am going to model for a guy who lives in my neighborhood who discovered me on some modeling site. I'm not sure I have to pay anything. He didn't say anything about paying. I think I just contribute to his portfolio. I might be on his website or whatever. And he's either professional or semi-professional! *Cant remember*

I would never pay anyone to model for me.
Then nobody would model for me.
These are just my friends I try to get to model for me! Not clients. I experiment with photography all the time. I do something new almost every time I have a photoshoot. I also don't think I'm that good of a photographer that people should pay me to get their picture taken. I accept donations though. XD

"Hi I'm a complete amateur photographer, I know you are my friend and all but I'd like to charge a lot of money for a photoshoot, how does that sound?"

Okay next photoshoot with people besides myself is probably with Amber or Zoe.

Amber- Looks like Lily Cole. Her hair used to be a more bluish color of red but it has gotten really Orange/red because it is fading back to her natural strawberry blonde color. Still pretty. Its really long and wavy. Amber es muy bonita. ^_^ cutest nose ever

Zoe-she has the cutest nose ever. well..its a tie between her, Amber, and Victoria Beckham. She has long, long, long blonde hair that I need to take pictures of before she cuts it. She wears glasses. She also has an ancient parasol+fan we can use in pictures. Her mom also wants her to model for me.

okay one last thing:
Its hilarious when people think I'm older than I actually am.
They either hit on me (which results in getting their hair pulled out bjork style...no..jk...) and then I get to tell them that I'm only 15 and they get really embarassed!!!! Or they give me really harsh critique and later look at my profile and realize I'm only a 15 year old who has been doing photography for about a year.


okay no really this is the last thing:

[link]

I'd so wear that.
Or would I?
I think my friends would have fun in pushing me over while my arms are all tied up like that.

oh wait...i realized it has some weird belt that is supposed to go between your legs. now that looks a bit awkward. O_O

I'm gonna find straight jackets on ebay.
byebye!

]]> ~LeLovelyZ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/13306739/ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/13306739/ Mon, 11 Jun 2007 17:44:32 PDT My best friend Zoe and I love "lolita" dresses and are planning on buying some then taking pictures of us in them. She is going to get her dress before me since she has money and I haven't started my summer job yet (still in school) and she doesn't mind getting her picture taken. I'm going to take lots of pictures of her sometime during the summer.

p.s. google is your best friend.
p.p.s. ebay is terribly addicting
p.p.p.s. so is amazon
p.p.p.p.s. so is ebay
p.p.p.p.p.s. ebay is much better because amazon is mostly costumes instead of clothes


Wow that was slightly unnecessary. But then again...I love being slightly unnecessary.

school classes I'm probably taking next year (junior year)

-english (AP English is only for senors grrrr)
-AP History
-an elective...probably choosing art history? omg we FINALLY are getting electives this year! we are so poor we couldn't afford electives for 4 years! >_<
-art
-pre-calculus (boring!!!!!)
-chemistry

by the way if you don't know already i go to a really ghetto school.
-no cafeteria
-no nurse
-no auditorium
-no grass.
-all the benches are snapped in half.
-gum just about everywhere you walk
-share a gym with the continuation school next to us
-share a building with that continuation school
-can't afford text books for every student so in a lot of classes we have to share text books in class
-can't afford paint (seriously!!!) so if you graffiti you have to buy the paint yourself
-well its in the middle of one of the most dangerous areas in the Bay Area
-the blacktop has potholes and huge cracks....everywhere....


thats okay.
im graduating early.
and going to community collage. (2 years. community collage is an alternative to a 4 year collage. or if you can't get into a university or collage of your choice then you go to a community collage and you are much more likely to get into a 4 year collage)
sweet.
And while i'm in community collage, I'll save up for art collage (Academy of Art in San Francisco is sooooooo expensive) which I'll be going to for four years.

]]> ~LeLovelyZ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/13224180/ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/13224180/ Tue, 05 Jun 2007 06:27:45 PDT [link]


what. the. fuck.
im confused.
what do you like? i thought i made a really good picture. i thought it would get more attention due to its awesomeness. but you like pretty pictures of pretty girls or pretty boys. okay. sure. whatever. i don't feel like picking up my camera anymore.

]]> ~LeLovelyZ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/13154277/ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/13154277/ Wed, 30 May 2007 17:24:26 PDT I'm fucking tired of this account.

I'm also fucking tired of deviantart.
Okay.
Not deviantart.
Those stupid retard people who make untalented artists extremely famous because they are "the hottest guy ever" even though they take really boring self-portraits. X____X Seriously. I look at their pictures and go "Wow if he was 'ugly' that picture wouldn't get ANY attention."

p.s. Amber is still up for the graveyard photoshoot! Sweet. Have to do some planning before she goes to a different school next year.


NEW ACCOUNT!!!!!!!: [link]

]]> ~LeLovelyZ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/13130554/ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/13130554/ Mon, 28 May 2007 23:29:37 PDT


Hahahahahahaha don't tell me that bullshit that Bush cares about the troops or the American people. Just don't. Or I will be forced to smack you.


I wonder if there is a SINGLE person at my school who likes Bush? No fucking way! XD Everyone there is poor black or poor latino. That's one thing I love about my school.


edit: I'm confused why people are always telling me "thank you for the fav." Does it really matter that much that you have to thank all 83948392843 people who favorite your work? HEhehe. <3 Thats okay. I don't mind. But I will give you a llama in return. Just to confuse you.

]]> ~LeLovelyZ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/13095386/ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/13095386/ Sat, 26 May 2007 00:24:01 PDT Sort of.
Most people assume that the typical person who dresses like me and listens to music like me does drugs or something. I don't do drugs to break that stereotype and then I fucking brag about it. Yeah. I admit it.

Also I don't do drugs because I don't want to.
I don't have a reason to.
Experimenting?
Psh.
I'd rather do a science experiment.
Because everyones doing it?
I'd love to get made fun of for not doing drugs! MWAHAHAHA!
Because its fun?
Going to Scandia is probably more fun.

I know a lot of people who do drugs and their experiences weren't that great. Some hallucinated some crazy shit that scared the crap out of them. Some did drugs and just felt retarded the whole time. Some told me that it seemed like inanimate objects like chairs were alive when they were high. WTF? X_X And one of my friends tells me her drugs are just temporary pain killers (emotional pain) and that the pain just gets worse afterwards. My other friend got stoned and pigged out on nachos for 3 hours straight. lol.

No thank you!

________________________________________ _________

Omg my best friend Kevin got mugged today.
I was so worried.
FUCK RICHMOND I FUCKING HATE IT HERE! SO much crime I'm SOOO TIRED OF IT.
My friend Zoe got mugged three times in the past year or two...
1. first time she got stabbed in the leg or arm or something
2. second time she got mugged ,or the girl certainly attempted to mug her, but Zoe punched her in the nose and probably broke it leaving the girl running off in tears+cussing like crazy
3. third time she got pushed to the ground and her wallet fell out of her pocket. The guy took the money out of the wallet (left the wallet. lol) and shouted "Stupid white bitch!" as he ran off

So Kevin got mugged today. 6 guys got out of a car and one asked him if he had money. Kevin said no. They pinned him to the ground and started punching him in the stomach and head and one guy wanted to take his cellphone but they failed because the whole time he was hanging onto his cellphone. They eventually took his wallet. He kept his cellphone but lost 60-100 dollars. Those fuckers. X___X

He's okay now. He said the punches in the head felt weak. :/ But he's a bit bruised up now. Omg I want to bake him some cookies or something!

Both of them got mugged in broad daylight.
If you get mugged here, nobody does shit about it.
They just ignore you. That's because people have guns...

Some guy in Richmond was beating up his pregnant girlfriend and some stranger told him to stop it and the guy shot him. *Sigh*

Any of you guys had experiences with getting mugged?

]]> ~LeLovelyZ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/13043894/ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/13043894/ Mon, 21 May 2007 20:36:11 PDT My brother's classmate's mom was giving out free kittens and I chose this super cute black cat. We haven't named him yet...we are still deciding on that.

He is in love with me.
He has big alien eyes and his paws are wayyyy too big for him.
And whenever he's not in my arms he mews and mews and mews until I hold him again! ^______^

Pictures on my flickr!!!!!!

[link]

__________________________________

Today I had to walk around in North Richmond.
It was scary as hell.
There are people who have no fucking lives who just stand on street corners and shout stuff at you and hang out there alllll day. Every single house is barred, tiny, and there are a ton of houses with pitbulls who try to jump over the fence and attack you.

Richmond is like the 12th most dangerous city in America to live in.
I go to school in a horrible neighborhood called the Iron triangle.
Where cars don't give a shit if they run over you or not.
I see about 3 dead cats every week now.
Lots of crime. (My friend got a gun to her head just by chasing after a girl who stole her cellphone in that neighborhood. My other friend got mugged 3 times this year.)

Well when I came back from North Richmond, the neighborhood my school was in was NOTHING compared to North Richmond. That's what depressed me so much. And now I want to get the fuck out of Richmond. :/

]]> ~LeLovelyZ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/13018722/ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/13018722/ Sat, 19 May 2007 21:36:20 PDT We search for about 10 minutes in Macys trying to find the bathing suit section. We ask some lady where it is (my mom is really shy and she tries to avoid asking employees where things are) and they tell us that they have no bathing suits there. I go,
"Fuck you Macys!" and we decide to go to JC Pennys which is on the other side of the mall. Walking across that mall was awful. Even though I was with my 50 whatever year old mother I got checked out sooo many times... I was trying to hide behind her and I was looking down at my feet but I could feel the stares...X_x And she was just laughing about it later and telling me that all the guys were looking at me. I....hate...malls....

Well JC Pennys had really stupid bathing suits so we drive all the way to Mervyns. And SURPRISE! I find the coolest bathing suit EVER!!! Green bathing suit with a bunch of white apples on it! Heheheheheheehehehe. It's really weird and I love it.

Today I went to the beach with my mom, Kenny, and my brother. It was nice...I wanted to tan. As I was closing my eyes and tanning (it wasn't very hot at all. It was about 60 degrees and it was kind of cold from the wind) I felt something sharp on my thigh. My inner thigh. Turns out a bee or a yellow jacket stung me! It hurt soooo badly I started crying. Lmao.

The ironic thing was a couple minutes before I got stung, I was talking about how I've never been stung by a bee or a yellow jacket or anything before. X_x Grrr...

Tomorrow is my old Catholic schools Spring Festival.
Everyone at that school thinks I'm a goth or calls me a goth.
Lol. Its really funny. But I'm going for the cake walk and to win a bunch of lollipops.

one last thing to say ....I GOT BANGS TODAY!!!
They look so good on me. Seriously.

]]> ~LeLovelyZ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/13002968/ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/13002968/ Fri, 18 May 2007 15:49:06 PDT have you ever heard Danish Reggae?!!? XD
Its HILARIOUS.

[link]


-------------------------------------------

After Kenny arrives for the weekend I am going to head to to Macys to buy a bathing suit.
I have a specific one in mind.
I want a rainbow bikini!
I looooove rainbow anything!

Then we are probably going to the beach tomorrow.
For some reason I hate beaches with a bloody firey passion.
Honestly I am sooooo bored there.
The whole time.
I don't know why.
Even if I bring a bunch of books or magazines or music I seriously feel bored as hell the whole time.

Beaches in Northern California are NOT like the beaches you see on TV.
Theres a bunch of little kids and people in their 40s.
The weather is about 60 degrees...not very sunny...:/
And its always fucking cold.
And the water is freezing.
Usually very windy.

I went to L.A. when I was 13 and the beaches there were so crowded you could barely walk. Then some guy used the "I'm-going-to-accidentally-throw-my-frisbee-by-that-girl-and-then-talk-to-her" method on me and I handed it to him and ran away as fast as I could as he was trying to talk to me...LOL.

But that shit doesn't happen at beaches I go to in Northern Cali. Ever! XD
If it did then Kenny would probably jump on their back and wrap seaweed around their necks and start choking them! XD XD
jk.


----------------------

I think I'm going to write a comic strip.
really really strange shit.
very much inspired by: [link]

Only not as perverted!
But muy offensive.
________________________

I've sneezed about 20 times in the past couple of hours. XD

]]> ~LeLovelyZ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/12991625/ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/12991625/ Thu, 17 May 2007 21:13:10 PDT yes...again...
i got bangs a while ago and nobody really noticed. XD
my bangs grow out super quickly.
well im getting bangs this weekend.
DAMMIT.
I can't wait. I want them now. I feel like chopping my hair off right now but I'd definitely regret that later.

Lmao I told Zoe and Amber that and she was like "WHAT??? YOU WANNA GET BANGED?" really fucking loud! XD XD *Shakes fist* Damn you Zoe.



My friend is pissing me off.
He keeps fake kissing me. Like putting his thumbs on my lips and kissing his thumbs. lol. Its hella funny. He does that shit all the time. And he keeps leaning in reaaaaallly slowly like hes about to kiss me. Its sooooooooo funny! He has a "girlfriend" *cough*onlinegirlfriendthosedontreallycount*cough* and I can so tell he wants to kiss me because he likes me but he cant. HAHAHAHA.

Don't do online relationships. You honestly NEVER know if they are faithful. She believes he is faithful 100% but he's not. (Ahem earlier in the year he came up to me and said he missed me and started kissing me. lmao. good job! hes a damn liar to his gf..) So you can't really say "I know he'd/she'd never do that." Well you can.. but you could be dead wrong. XD


p.s. oh my god.
i love Swedish people. They have the BEST FUCKING ACCENTS EVER!

okay. awesome accents:
1. Swedish
2. British
3. German
4. Turkish (biased because I'm Turkish<3)
5. Irish
6. Russian
7. Australian
8. Japanese

]]> ~LeLovelyZ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/12974260/ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/12974260/ Wed, 16 May 2007 06:43:04 PDT
2. I am absolutely obsessed with Combichrist. Lol. Just how Jack Off Jill was my obsession last week. But I listen to more songs by Combichrist.

3. I realized it has become my nature now to be controversial and say controversial things. I think people need to be exposed more to controversy because it's everywhere and people are just trying to sweep it under a rug. (There are so many people out there trying to hide it.)

4. Omg I'm going on a road trip with my two best friends! Kenny (ex boyfriend but he's still my bestfriend but I'm going to ask him out soon) and Kevin (we sort of hung out in 8th grade but he really became my best friend when we talked online all the time in 9th-10th grade). A road trip with Kenny, Kevin, me (of course), my mom, and my brother. We are probably going all the way up to Canada. I can stand it more this time (my mom, brother and i did that last year) because we will be driving in a mini-van and it wont be as boring with my two best friends with me.

]]> ~LeLovelyZ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/12949642/ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/12949642/ Mon, 14 May 2007 06:44:09 PDT
hahahaha.
wow.
so apparently you can download my pictures off of flickr even though I set an option that makes it so you can't. I'm so confused.
Well...you bastards with no talent to make your own awesome picture are in luck now! You have someone to do it for you! Fuck you! I shall throw cookies at your eyeballs and make you blind.


hmm im okay now.
im listening to crazy electronic music. ^___^
school time!
can't wait to come back and see how freaked out people are by me+my stupid rants. XD XD XD

]]> ~LeLovelyZ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/12914556/ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/12914556/ Thu, 10 May 2007 18:30:02 PDT
He said he showed everyone my flickr and everyone (boys and girls) think I'm hot. XD Nobody at my school thinks I'm hot (except 5 people that I know of) but when I went to Monterey I kept getting checked out by a million emo boys. I got so freaked out by all the attention I hid from everyone. No matter how many people think I'm pretty or whatever I still cringe whenever I look in the mirror.

Anyways.
I found some of the most AMAZING pictures on deviantart!
All in my favorites.
My god.
I'm drooling.

And really excited because I have so much inspiration. ^^
This is why I'm staying on devaintart!
Also...if anyone on flickr wants to know more about me they can just come here and read my journals.
I just don't feel like getting ripped.
That's all.
Even if you are a mediocre photographer.
People still rip your work.
It's crazy.

Also...I get money for watching bunnies this weekend. Saturday+Sunday.
At Annie's Annuals they are having a Mother's day sale and I get to hang out with Angelo and make sure the little sadist kiddies don't torture the bunnies. Sometimes they pick up the bunnies and throw them back on the ground...then pick up the bunnies and throw them on the ground again...XD

]]> ~LeLovelyZ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/12852819/ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/12852819/ Sat, 05 May 2007 13:55:53 PDT
1. intentional blurriness.
2. intentional motion blur.
3. crazy fashion makeup
4. selective focusing
5. flipping the picture upside down/to the side
6. intentional overexposure
7. crazy outfits (makes the picture much more interesting)
8. lowering the brightness of the picture
9. making the blacks in the picture lighter
10. asking the model to do anything but pose and smile for the camera
11. leaving supposed "flaws" on the face

Umm anymore I forgot?
Yeah I forgot some...


It's really hard to explain to people these things.
People just don't get why we do these things.
Artistic reasons.
To do something daring.
Because it's creative.

It's hard getting non-photographers to model for me.
They don't understand what I want.
They think I want a picture of them posing and smiling. A generic picture.
Or making them look "celebrity pretty." Hmm..hard to explain that.

My friend got mugged for the 80 millionth time the other day.
Her face is scratched up.
I think she looks soooooooo beautiful anyways.
Before she got mugged, she didn't want me to take her picture because she had a little mole on her face. She thinks that imperfections makes her unfit to be a model...or something. I say those so called "imperfections" make the picture a whole lot more interesting. And now she has this pretty bruise on her temple and I want her to be my model even more! ^^

okay im gonna go buy a shitload of books.
I like books.
ttyl everyone <3

I'm not really hysterical.
I just think that thing is cute.

p.s. I'm going through this stage in life where I think everyone looks boring so I wear crazy or at least "different" makeup+clothes out in public. And I think it makes peoples lives more interesting. Even if they laugh...or are disgusted or confused...its something that doesn't happen every day.

The average person with the average life...walking through a typical day...looking at people who dress in typical clothes just like theirs. And they see this really strange girl...it just makes their lives a bit more interesting even in the slightest way. I like to do that.

]]> ~LeLovelyZ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/12841090/ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/12841090/ Fri, 04 May 2007 14:37:19 PDT you're not going anywhere if you're fucking ugly...

LMFAO IM SOOOOOOO KIDDING!!!!
*Ahem* anyone heard of sarcasm?
Sarcasm is kind of cruel. I should stop. *Stops*

Well anyways.
I just think DA is shit.
Because of this.
I hate being a little bitch but everyone likes him for his looks. Don't believe me? Look at the comments! XD :

[link]


Nope.
Not his fault that everyone likes his looks.
Not attacking him.
Just his annoying fans.
Actually he does have some interesting pictures that I like.
So Merry Fucking Christmas.
I'm going to eat cookies and then throw them at people.
Okay really..I'm going to soak my lipring in salt water. I've had enough cookies.

oohh I think im gonna get a lot of shit for this journal entry...


]]> ~LeLovelyZ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/12778418/ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/12778418/ Sun, 29 Apr 2007 12:41:59 PDT
"That's nice." I told him.


Teenagers are so apathetic.

]]> ~LeLovelyZ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/12724346/ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/12724346/ Tue, 24 Apr 2007 22:35:47 PDT Angelo is my slightly younger (but acts my age) new friend who is very photogenic+interesting.
He is going to be my model soon! ^_^
Sooner than I thought.
He was such a cool little kid...he wore spikey collars and had mohawks since he was 3 years old. XD

We took lots of pictures (snapshots!!!) of ourselves wearing old goggles and wigs with his compact camera...I told him to upload the pictures and send to my email...

I was thinking "Hmmm where the fuck do I get a gas mask?" Because I have THE coolest ideas. And yay. Angelo has a gas mask! He has a bunch of other cool masks and when he comes back from his dad's house on Thursday...I'm going to borrow them.


Ohhh I feel so inspired right now.
So much creativity flowing through my brain!
I'm taking pictures tomorrow.
It's my ex-boyfriend/best friend's birthday and I promised him I'd make him a finger painting but he lives 2 hours away so a quicker way would be to paint my face and take some pictures.

New inspiration!!!:
[link]

]]> ~LeLovelyZ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/12288130/ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/12288130/ Thu, 22 Mar 2007 18:27:56 PDT
]]> ~LeLovelyZ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/11893886/ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/11893886/ Tue, 20 Feb 2007 11:48:08 PST I'm so fucking tired of seeing it on peoples websites.
Especially xanga.
And those stupid "scene kids" who like to steal peoples work or pretend that they are that person.
I'm just going to post on flickr where its a LOT HARDER to rip my work.

If you'd like to see my photography go here:
[link]
[link]
[link]
[link]
[link]

lol. Yeah.....I know I just wrote that 5 times. XD
I'm keeping my D.A. to write journals+favorite peoples work+watch people.

]]> ~LeLovelyZ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/11868494/ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/11868494/ Sun, 18 Feb 2007 13:25:21 PST I can edit my raw images in cs2 in the 16 bit channel (looooots of detail).
And if I were to keep opening and closing and manipulating the image, it wouldn't lose it's quality like jpgs would.
And I can completely manipulate the white balance to perfection.
I realized the controls aren't that complicated at all.

So now I ONLY shoot in raw.

Doodoodoo.
I haven't been shooting much though.
I am very embarassed by my DA because it sucks so much.
I don't know which pictures to add from my flickr to make me like it better.
And I'm not that happy with my flickr anyways.

I have all of next week off to hang around my house. So I'm going to try to improve my photography.

I have three problems right now with my photography.
1. I shoot against a plain white backdrop too often. So I'm going to avoid the studio for the next week.
2. I have really boring clothes. I can't do anything about that besides try to reconstruct them (like in "photophobia"). Because of the vacation we went on in December, my mom is so broke that I can't get the money she owes me until April!!!! And Jesus Christ..that vacation wasn't even that expensive.
3. I'm lacking creativity/inspiration right now but I'm really trying to find it again.

Once I get my money I want to buy:
1. A strip box
2. A 50mm 1.8 lens
3. new clothes
4. a black backdrop

]]> ~LeLovelyZ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/11792652/ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/11792652/ Mon, 12 Feb 2007 22:52:05 PST
The vast, vast majority of the black kids at my school HATE being called "African American." They claim its stupid because they didn't live in Africa and neither did their parents or grandparents...etc. Technically their ancestors are from Africa but they don't want to be associated with people from Africa.

I only know ONE guy who is black is offended by being called "black" and would prefer to be "African American."

So I had no idea what to do once I learned this and just avoided the subject for a while.
Then I realize something one day.

Kenny (my now ex boyfriend) is black and he isn't even African American. It would be incorrect to call him African American because none of his parents or grandparents or great great great grandparents (Etc) are from Africa. They are either from Barbados or Jamaica. (He is also mixed with a lot of unknown things...possibly Irish and some Asian.)

Technically everyone is from Africa if you go back millions and millions and millions and millions (etc) of years ago. Omg I can't wait until the world is so mixed we don't have to worry about this crap. :-p

So I say FUCK POLITICAL CORRECTNESS.
There are so many rules.


Some people would find it racist of me to call people "blacks" because they assume I'm white. Well...turns out I'm half-middle eastern (just a really pale one who doesn't get out in the sun). According to people at my school that makes me "less racist" now since I'm not as white as they thought.


ahhhhhhh controversy.
:/

neeeeeed....sleeeeepppp....goodnight everyone.

]]> ~LeLovelyZ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/11772364/ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/11772364/ Sun, 11 Feb 2007 11:37:01 PST It took forever to load, and I did color correction in raw and contrast (etc) and I still hate the colors. But there is lots of detail!

Sooo...
what are the pros and cons of shooting in raw?

]]> ~LeLovelyZ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/11746320/ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/11746320/ Fri, 09 Feb 2007 11:23:52 PST He lived in my house since last summer and NOW he realizes that work in the Bay Area is EXTREMELY hard to find. So he's going back to his house (which is two hours away) to go to collage and to find a job. If we were to stay together, we'd eventually break up anyways because we would hardly see eachother. We have plans of getting back together in the future..so breaking up now would be better than later.

I went out with him for almost two years. T~T
He was so perfect...


*Note* He's not interested in other girls...
So all those stupid bitches who hit on him constantly still don't have a chance.

]]> ~LeLovelyZ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/11682448/ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/11682448/ Sun, 04 Feb 2007 10:25:59 PST
Sometimes I really couldn't care less if people don't like my pictures or something about my pictures because usually its the thing that I LIKE about my picture.

The critique I get can't even apply to future pictures (hard to explain but trust me on this)....so isn't that what critique is about? If critique doesn't help you then why say it?

When I give critique I always make it technical. Not "Please...blahblahblah doesn't work." (Which is the one I got that pissed me off...especially that "please" part...sounds really snobby in my opinion)


On another note:
Queen Mary 2 passes under the Golden Gate bridge...and I get to watch!

Also..it sucks watching Anchorman on abc....VERY censored...they left out all the funny parts. I'm going to have to rent it...*sigh*

]]> ~LeLovelyZ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/11644028/ http://LeLovelyZ.deviantart.com/journal/11644028/ Thu, 01 Feb 2007 06:38:36 PST
2. OMG HARRY POTTER EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
July 21st.
I've been a Harry Potter fan since I was 9 years old. 6 and a half years..XD

]]> ~LeLovelyZ