deviantART: by:MidnightPredator http://search.deviantart.com/?q=by:MidnightPredator&section=today deviantART RSS for by:MidnightPredator en-us Copyright 2009, deviantART.com Tue, 22 Dec 2009 15:29:13 PST deviantART.com http://blogs.law.harvard.edu/tech/rss http://s.deviantart.com/minish/widgets/apple-touch-icon-precomposed.png My Parents (a long rant) http://MidnightPredator.deviantart.com/journal/29032068/ http://MidnightPredator.deviantart.com/journal/29032068/ Sat, 19 Dec 2009 03:21:31 PST
I don't like them. As people. If I met them somewhere they are not the kind of people I'd ever want to really speak to again.

I also don't respect them. They are very weak willed. My sister and I tore each other apart because there was never any discipline in the house. When she stole and broke my things, they never did anything about it so I had to deal with it myself and as a kid the only way I could think of to deal with it was to beat her senseless. My little sisters are just the same way now. They have no chores, no rules, nothing. The house is always trashed. And my parents smoke, drink, and watch TV. From the second they get home they are ALWAYS doing at least one of those things, if not more.

They don't respect me. They constantly mock me, even things I am proud of. When I graduated they laughed at how stupid my robes were and told me I looked lost and confused when I got my diploma and the people giving it to me probably thought I looked so stupid they thought about taking it back. Gee thanks.

I don't feel like they even love me. My parents refused to even pay for lunch for me at school. I went all through grade school up until graduation without ever eating lunch at school that they provided. They never took me shopping to buy me clothes. My grandmother took me once a year to go christmas shopping. The rest of my clothing consisted of (and still mostly consists of) shirts that I got for free or shirts that I got for cheap that I paid for myself from club activities. And speaking of club activities my parents refused to give me a ride to those. I hitched rides with friends mostly or asked my grandparents to go out of the way and help me out. I had to walk at 5:30 in the morning to the bus stop down the road. It was a 20 minute walk and there was no houses all the way from my house to the end of the road. It was dark and in the middle of the forest. From there I had to take an hour long bus ride to school. It's a 10-15 minute drive from our house though...

Whenever I was sad, they teased me or ignored me. When I got the phone call saying my grandmother had died, I told my dad and all he said was, "Well what are you crying for, she had cancer, you knew it was going to happen." Then he went back to the TV. I sobbed alone in my room until I fell asleep and slept for about 20 hours. I didn't eat for a few days. They never once checked in on me or asked me if I was okay or even noticed I wasn't eating. Whenever one of my pets died, I wrapped it up and found a box for it and took it out to the woods where I found a nice tree to bury it under. I usually ended up crying myself to sleep right there on the ground outside. I wonder if they even noticed I didn't come inside.

I also had a lot of chores. I had to keep my room clean, clean the whole kitchen, the whole bathroom, and the entry way. That includes scrubbing things, cleaning dishes, toilets, showers, everything. My sister had the living room, dining room, and downstairs living room as her jobs to clean. I spent a lot of time cleaning up, they made a huge mess and never did anything. Their excuse was they worked all day, they shouldn't have to work in their own home. They even hired people to mow the lawn, or just plain didn't do it. On top of that, I took care of the animals by my own choice. In my life, I have never seen my father clean. Hell, when I was sick, I used to have to clean up my own mess.

In comparison, my little sisters are 8 and 10. They get lunch made for them every day and a ride to school. They're both in cheer-leading (which my parents refused to pay for) and a few other sports. My parents go to every event and game. They have more clothes than I've ever owned and lots of games and toys and things like that. They don't have any chores at all. The house is always a mess now, no one cleans. Last time I went over, I decided to do the dishes since I needed a glass and there was no clean ones. The sink was overflowing with dishes and there was a horrible smell because the sink doesn't have a garbage disposal and they had been putting their plates with food and stuff still on them right in the sink. The stuff in the water was rotting and there was even maggots living in a few bowls. They had been using paper plates and plastic silverware and cups to avoid doing dishes.

My parents have never came to visit me since I moved off to college. I've been there three years and they don't even know where I lived. They have called me a grand total of twice, once to ask me for money and once to tell me some loan school stuff showed up and they weren't paying for it.

They haven't been with me for my birthday since I was 13. They go down to Florida for bike week. I have always spent my birthdays with my grandparents and my animals pretty much alone. When they get back, they give me a t-... ]]> ~MidnightPredator Just for Fun http://MidnightPredator.deviantart.com/journal/28932504/ http://MidnightPredator.deviantart.com/journal/28932504/ Sun, 13 Dec 2009 21:48:54 PST
"you would like to be around to join in that celebration, wouldn't you?" "Yes... Master."

Wow it sounds so creepy with just that line. It's actually a WoW book ><

2.) Stretch your left arm out as far as you can. What can you reach?
computer tower, cough syrup, fish tank, the drawers on my desk, paper, headphones, tablet

3.) What is the last thing you watched on TV?
Glee

4.) Without looking guess what time it is?
12:30

5.) Now look at the clock. What is the actual time?
12:43

6.) With the exception of the computer, what can you hear?
My fish tank

7.) When did you last step outside? What were you doing?
I was walking to the caf

8.) Before you started this survey, what did you look at?
Neopound forums/DA

9.) What are you wearing?
Grey PJs

10.) Did you dream last night?
I don't remember my dream I had at night, but I did have a dream when I fell asleep on my book in the study lounge that my ex boyfriend was trying to cuddle me and he looked so happy and completed that I let him even though I didn't want to

11.) When did you last laugh?
I don't know, probably talking to my roommate

12.) What are one the walls you are in?
What?

13.) Seen anything weird lately?
I live in a college dorm... so yes

14.) What do you think of this quiz?
I think toaster.

15.) What was the last film you saw?
Uuuummmmmm... I don't remember

16.) If you became a multi-millionaire overnight, what would you buy?
A new computer, a house, and a makeover.

17.) Tell me something about you that I don't know?
I have deformed baby toes that are missing a bone and twist completely on their sides.

18.) If you could change one thing about the world,
I would probably be instantly killed because 90% of the world would hate me after I changed something

20.) George Bush:
Tina Turner?

21.) Imagine your first child is a girl, what do you call her?
Acrasia

22.) Imagine your first child is a boy, what do you call him?
Micah

23.) Would you ever consider living abroad?
YES

24.) What do you want God to say when you reach the pearly gates?
I imagine if God existed when I got there he's be like "IN YOUR FACE I AM TOO REAL" then do a victory in your face type dance.

25.) Tag six people who must also do this in THEIR journal:

Don't wanna...

]]> ~MidnightPredator I'm so full... http://MidnightPredator.deviantart.com/journal/28601512/ http://MidnightPredator.deviantart.com/journal/28601512/ Thu, 26 Nov 2009 23:50:44 PST Watch meNote meJournal Instructions

... and it's so good. I've been eating pretty randomly. Maybe 1 meal a day for a few days, then 4 meals one day, then no meals and a bunch of snacks.

To just sit down and eat all day long I feel so full and it feels so good. I really love pretty much every food served traditionally for thanksgiving. I like the idea of just taking some time to be grateful for everything I have.

And right now I'm really grateful for this wonderful food and I hope there will be some left to take home with me.

And I sat down and have some serious talking with my mom about my future and I feel so much better about a lot of things.

So happy Thanksgiving any watcher of mine reading this! A bit late... but still!

Journal Skin by =Thewinator
Shell stocks by ~huomennastock, ~chop-stock and ~hatestock
]]> ~MidnightPredator Simple Week http://MidnightPredator.deviantart.com/journal/28543410/ http://MidnightPredator.deviantart.com/journal/28543410/ Tue, 24 Nov 2009 07:56:33 PST
I'm really just ready for a fresh start. I'm hoping this break will give me time to pull myself together and just breath.

I'm watching America's Next Top Model. What guilty pleasure of mine. Some of the poses, costumes, sets, etc, are really inspiring. My art has been... nonexistent. I'm hoping I can create something I'll be proud of soon.

]]> ~MidnightPredator More Updates and BC http://MidnightPredator.deviantart.com/journal/28337530/ http://MidnightPredator.deviantart.com/journal/28337530/ Fri, 13 Nov 2009 17:13:38 PST
[link]

Updates:
- I am a slacker and not getting my homework done at all
- I don't think I've spoken to my significant other in 2 days
- I've found some amazing music
- This RP = Fun

What a boring week.

]]> ~MidnightPredator BC + Updates http://MidnightPredator.deviantart.com/journal/28256970/ http://MidnightPredator.deviantart.com/journal/28256970/ Mon, 09 Nov 2009 21:27:36 PST
BC Link: [link] Vote for my Talo?

Updates:
- Failed a physics test
- Passed a stats test
- Still no response about my frozen accounts
- Still emo as of late
- I one shot a level 80 today on my lock (What level 80 has under 14k hp?)

Yup that's all

]]> ~MidnightPredator MUSIC *dances* http://MidnightPredator.deviantart.com/journal/28011164/ http://MidnightPredator.deviantart.com/journal/28011164/ Wed, 28 Oct 2009 12:24:26 PDT All the rabbit's
In your hat, it's
It's where they belong

[link] - I can't stop listening to it.

Which brings me to the topic of music. I love music, I really really do. Sadly I don't love the music in my country, there's very little of it I enjoy, the radio is practically torture for me. Especially. Country, I really dislike country.

So I'm going to listen a small (very small) sample of my larger (very larger) music library to give everyone who doesn't really care, but if reading this because they're probably bored or got sucked in with some awesome CAPS LOCK title, will have some idea of the music I listen to.

I really highly recommend you look up any of these songs/artsts and give them a listen. It can't be too bad, right? after all, I listen to it... *grin*

My Top 5 Most Played:
Shiny Disco Balls - WHO DA FUNK feat JESSICA EVE
Children - 4 Clubbers
Reise, Reise - Rammstein
Citoyen du monde ft Zaho - Tunisiano
Room Nineteen - Wolfgang Parker

5 Most Recently Played:
Miles Of Love (Beeside Radio Edit)- Benny Benassi
Re-Fresh EP: Return To Tazmania - Delegate vs. Emo-Trance
Midnight Show - The Killers
I Should Know - Dirty Vegas
Rainbow Islands - Dj Hixxy

Most Popular Artists (Aka I have more of their songs then anyone else)
DJ Tiesto (... I seriously just have gigs of nothing but Tiesto)
Sinik
Jason Hayes (WoW soundtracks, lol)
Benny Banassi
A Perfect Circle


So yup.

MUSIC

What kind of music do you guys listen to?

]]> ~MidnightPredator Depressed - Need a New Major http://MidnightPredator.deviantart.com/journal/27625976/ http://MidnightPredator.deviantart.com/journal/27625976/ Wed, 07 Oct 2009 00:42:02 PDT
I had a really hard week. Right now I don't want to go to bed because if I go to bed, I will wake up and it will be tomorrow. Tomorrow I have lots of classes. I hate my classes this year so much I could fill up pages just writing about how horrid they are.

I keep failing tests I study my ass off for because I go in and I blank. I either don't know it, don't remember it, or can't figure out the math involved. Numbers confuse me, they don't make sense.

I cried more this week then I have since the end of my last bad relationship. I can't handle this.

I'm switching majors as soon as I can find who to talk to. It seems no one knows how to switch majors around here. I keep asking and they either don't know or don't want to take the time to tell me. Everyone just sends me to "the website" and says there's info on there. Obviously I'm not finding it.

Does anyone have a good suggestion for a degree change that wont require me to redo the past few years? I'm currently a Zoology major which means I've taken many zoology, biology, and chemistry classes. I'm looking for something with less math and less chemistry. I've gotten all my university requirements out of the way as well as the math requirements. I just need something that is very open to electives so they'll accept my zoology credits as part of my major. I'm honestly considering a BS in psychology, but of all things an elementary science ed major might be the best option for graduating on time. I have everything they require except teaching electives.

]]> ~MidnightPredator Accomplished http://MidnightPredator.deviantart.com/journal/27514629/ http://MidnightPredator.deviantart.com/journal/27514629/ Thu, 01 Oct 2009 01:56:26 PDT
On neopets: I made to-do lists for all my pets.I wasn't chosen to adopt Talort so I used a draik day draik I made, Talishata, to recreate the character. I got the petpage fixed and up today. I also coded a petpage for Iambic. I've owner her forever and just now got around to doing this.There's also a new design (again -_-) for xylare coming.

In real life: I passed my chem test. I went to all my classes this week. I got medication to make some back problems I've been having go away. Which is so rare for me, I hate the doctors. I'm going to try and keep my focus through the weekend. We'll see what happens.

]]> ~MidnightPredator Rude http://MidnightPredator.deviantart.com/journal/27173858/ http://MidnightPredator.deviantart.com/journal/27173858/ Sat, 12 Sep 2009 16:11:50 PDT
Honestly.

People act so horrible to each other online. It does no good to say, "Hey, you're being a dick. In real life you'd never actually say this to someone's face so quit saying it to me." because then they claim they would in fact say the same things to someone's face in real life.

Which really makes me wonder.

Because I've never had people be so blatantly rude to me as they are on the internet. Ever. And it's not like I live a sheltered life, I live in a college campus with something like 40 thousand undergrads alone on campus.

And that's my rant for today. Because I can't rant anywhere else without people just trying to continue the argument I walked away from in the first place. Nice how that works.

]]> ~MidnightPredator EPIC FAIL! http://MidnightPredator.deviantart.com/journal/26993567/ http://MidnightPredator.deviantart.com/journal/26993567/ Thu, 03 Sep 2009 10:09:13 PDT
Today I had one class. It meets from 10:20 until 11:40, breaks for an hour, then resumes from 12:40 until 3:30 in a different room.

The first half is lecture, the second half is a lab type situation. We need to design an experiment based on a marine system, build and run the system successfully, and run our experiment, then our term paper will be basically a mock peer reviewed paper which could be submitted to a theoretical scientific paper if they cared about undergrad studies.

Not the point.

The point is, I took a class that looked exactly like it on my schedule last semester. Same times, same days. So I glanced at my schedule, got the room numbers, went to class. I was 10 minutes late so the teacher was already mid-lectured. But he paused, pointed out an open seat for me, and of course everyone turned to stare at me blushing and walking to my seat.

Sat for a half an hour before I realized I was in the wrong class. I realized that I looked at last years schedule on accident. Same time, place... different room. Nice. I was sitting in on an introductory oceanography class. I should have known something was wrong when he started explaining really basic nitrogen/phosphorous crap.

The teacher gives the class a 5 minute break at around 11:10 and I slipped out with the people heading to the bathroom and went to lunch. Ate. Waited until 12:35 or so and went back across the road and to the correct room this time.

The door is closed. The lights are off. No one is there except me and one other girl in the hall waiting.

Finally my old Zol 460 TA comes by, notices me, and we start chatting about how summer went. He gets around to asking what class I was waiting for and I told him and he laughed at me then said, "Brittany, Zoology labs don't start until next week."

So to sum it up... I woke up, went to the wrong class, then waited around for a class that didn't even meet this week.

Wow.

I feel like a freshman. Aren't I supposed to know wtf I'm doing by now?

]]> ~MidnightPredator Life the Universe and Random Lyrics http://MidnightPredator.deviantart.com/journal/26798438/ http://MidnightPredator.deviantart.com/journal/26798438/ Mon, 24 Aug 2009 14:47:03 PDT
I'm moving out of my parents and back into my dorm. I can't decide if I'm going to bring all my fish... a 30 gallon tank is a lot to maintain in a dorm room. On top of that I just bought a new bookshelf and a chair and a floor lamp and... and... I want to take them with me! But space is valuable in a dorm room...

I luff mah fishies though.

I can't wait to move back out. I dislike having to rely on my parents during the summer, but I just don't have the money not to. This summer went well too, as well as can be expected of my family. That is, of course, until a week ago when my sister moved back in.

To give some back story on my sister, she has been kicked out of my parent's house twice, my brother's house, my aunt's house, her biological mother's house, and she had her own place for awhile, but got evicted. And now she's back. And my food is gone.

I found amazing sales the day before yesterday at the grocery store so I started stocking up for my dorm. I bought 10 bags of chips, tons of granola bars, tea. Lots of tea. Soap. Bathroom stuff. (Also clothes, and that furniture, yeah I bought a lot). Yesterday I went to my Dad's for my sister's birthday. I ate brunch there and stuffed myself. So I ended up skipping dinner.

So today I'm like uuughhh hungry. I made jell-o the other night and left it in the fridge overnight to solidify. I was thinking YAY JELLY GOODNESS.

It was gone. I used two little boxes because I know my step-dad really likes it too so I figured he might like some. But it was gone.

So I'm pissed. I was like, fuck it, I don't feel like making something again. I'm going to just break into my snack foods a week early. I go into the garage and look into the box where everything was. There's 3 bags of chips. I bought 10. I was gone yesterday. My parents were working until after I got home. So unless they ate it before they went to work, my sister ate 7 bags of chips and my jell-o. In one and a half days.

I called my mom and she said there's no way that's possible, there must be some sort of explanation. All I know is my sister weighs over 400 pounds, my food is gone, and the dog doesn't know how to open chips.

GRRRRrrrRRRrrrr! MINE! I feel like I need to get food aggressive and bite her when she gets near my stuff. And I'm not making anything again, even as simple as jell-o.


Random Lyrics:

These are translated over from French. Poorly. I'm not fluent in the language, if anyone is and knows the song, please help me out a bit haha. All I have to go by is what I picked up when I was in Quebec and this French-English dictionary.

Okoume - Son rire
Her laughter, music to my ears

Her laughter, like a ray of sunshine
And while she danced at her window
Just before the night comes
It is perhaps that she will want me.
And me, I like it, I will follow it.

Every day she lives
She makes me live again (Also means, she revives me. She brings me to life.)
Every day she lives
She makes me live again

Her laughter I hear when I fall asleep
Her laugh makes me laugh even at death (Could be makes me laugh even in death?)
And if she sings at her window
It's as if there will be no autumn
And she wants me perhaps
I'll be the happiest man

Through the noise of the trucks
Cold and grey of the concrete
I smile when I hear her name
Her name

And waiting and waiting (From what I can tell it's waiting in expectation. Like anticipation.)

Every day she lives
She makes me live again
Every day she lives
She makes me live again (x2)


Wow that translation sucked.

]]> ~MidnightPredator Updates - Lyrics for Fun http://MidnightPredator.deviantart.com/journal/26373353/ http://MidnightPredator.deviantart.com/journal/26373353/ Tue, 04 Aug 2009 04:48:09 PDT
Some things I've learned recently are that:

-- I can use Select --> Inverse to fill in my line art a lot easier. No more coloring in the lines by hand.
-- I learned how to make an underwater scene
-- How useful Select --> Feather can be in some situations.
-- I learned what some of the more advanced blur options do and how to edit the defaults.


I've improved at:

-- Feet and paw anatomy. Though I'm still not as good as I'd like to be.
-- Pixel Art. I've picked up a few tips and tricks to speed up the work.
-- Stamina. Sounds silly when you first read that word, but my right hand starts to cramp up pretty badly and ache when I work too long. I've found a few different ways to keep myself from clenching it so hard by changing my tablet settings and how I hold my pen.


As for my personal, non-art, but still computer life.


I've been irritated a lot with people lately, but surprisingly most of the people I'm irritated with aren't my family. Which is kind of new for me. Most of them are just random people on the internet, like this guy who has 2 accounts and was ganking me, then tracking me by my guild tag on his other account to gank me again. There's also a person on these forums I visit whose rude behavior makes me cringe. My boyfriend frequents an airbrush forum with a very hypocritically liberal person who keeps igniting political arguments. My boyfriend himself has been upsetting me with his constant complaining and crude things he keeps saying in the worst possible situations.

I just want to shut them all the hell up. I want to force them to stop their actions. If it were real life I'd want to hit them, but I'd walk away. Then I'd complain to my friend and tell them how close I got to hitting them in an angry tone with an aggressive stance to relieve the stress. I'm so passive. I'd never actually hit them. The only person I've ever hit with the intent is my sister and a drunk guy who tried to grab me when I was walking home.

I wish people like this didn't get to me, but they do. I refuse to "get a tougher skin" as some people have recommended. To me, that's synonymous with saying "don't feel emotion." Of course it upsets me when people say and do things to purposely upset me. It hurts, and they know it, or else they wouldn't say it. Even on the internet. I refuse to desensitize myself to being hurt or watching someone hurt others. It shouldn't feel acceptable. It shouldn't be ok. I think there's something right with a person who can watch someone hurt another human being who has done nothing wrong. That's my strong sense of morality I suppose? -_-

Instead, I wish I could find an internet equivalent of walking away from them that doesn't involve giving up something I want to do. Ignoring them doesn't work for me, and I don't find it's ok, especially if it's not me they are hurting. Stronger sense to protect others than myself, that can't be healthy for me. XD

For the people on WoW, I'm going to go back to playing a char on a PVE server so I will have something to do if worst comes to worst. Maybe if I reconnect with enough people back there, I'll consider a transfer. Not many people I play with often are left on my server, and my best friends might follow me.

For the people on forums, I'm going to type out the damn response and delete it. I guess I'll play the princess in a tower and let someone else handle it. Eventually they will piss someone off who wont be afraid and will be able to do something about it. Or they will get bored. Or learn to get along.

And for the boyfriend, I'm going to try communicating better with him using lots of I statements.

I feel ____ because of what you _____ and I would like to talk about it.


I feel good if you read this far because it means you're either bored like me or care about me.

I'm also going to try exercising more to relieve stress and pent up frustrations. I just bought a DVD I used to watch in my high school gym class that I loved.

Lyrics time!


The World is Mine - David Guetta


I believe in the wonder
I believe this new life to gain
Like a God that I'm under
There's a drugs running through my veigns

I believe in the wonder
I believe I can touch the flame
There's a spell that I'm under
Got to fly, I don't feel no shame

The world is mine (x3)

I've lost my fear to war and peace
I don't mind that (the world is mine)
You took the price and realize
That to your eyes (the world is mine)

Take a look what you've started
In the world flashing from your eyes
And you know that... ]]> ~MidnightPredator BC - Dog Troubles - Parent Complaints http://MidnightPredator.deviantart.com/journal/26155333/ http://MidnightPredator.deviantart.com/journal/26155333/ Fri, 24 Jul 2009 16:54:56 PDT
Well the first thing is my Draik Xylare's BC entry found here: [link]

I've done horribly the past two weeks and I really need to advertise more if I want to take advantage of the free time this summer.

The parent complaints are just that they don't seem to understand I have a life separate from theirs yet. For 9 months of the year, I live alone. Without them. And I manage just fine. I make my own schedule, have my own way of living, do my own things. But they haven't quite got that through in their heads yet. They keep trying to tell me what I can/can't do and when I don't tell them about plans I have they freak out on me for not consulting them. Either that or they make plans for me but don't tell me about them. Like today they informed me I was going with them to a wedding for some cousin I don't know on Sunday... I already have plans this weekend! Plans I can't cancel because the people I have plans with needed to take the day off work so, no, I can't just do it some other day because they took their vacation time for that day! Ugh.

My parents are genuinely trying to accept the fact I'm an adult who just comes to visit for the summer, but they're not doing so well. When I point it out, they apologize and say they wont do it again. But they forget. It's really annoying. Next year I think I'm going to stay with my boyfriend for the summer and perhaps consider moving in with him instead of going in the university housing for another year. We'll see how they take that.

My dog troubles come in here that my dog is completely dependent on people. Which is, well, sort of a given when it comes to animals. But honestly, she can't be left alone for more then half an hour without spazzing out. My parents have been gone on vacations and business trips since the 1st of July and I'm staying home with the doggy and I'm usually on the computer, watching TV, or talking on the phone. She's not allowed up in the third floor where my room is (also where the computer is) because the cats food/water/litter box are up there. She gets into all three of those if she can which is so not cool. And she's not allowed in the living room where the TV is because she gets up on the couch and makes a horrible mess and my mom has threatened to get rid of her. So both those areas of the house have gates to keep her out.

She literally leans up against the gates and whines for me for hours if I don't come give her some attention. Or she'll spazz out. Her spaz attacks are just getting worse and worse too. It started with her scratching up the walls/door and trying to dig in the carpet while whining and crying. So I started going down every hour or so to give her a few minutes of attention. I also was leaving the radio on in one of the rooms she is allowed in so she might thing people were around.

But that didn't stop it. It turned into all that plus she started throwing herself at the stupid gates over and over and doing things like ripping down curtains and attacking our cats which she usually ignored. So I upped it to giving her attention every half an hour.

Yesterday I had just gotten done spending an hour reading a book in the living room and petting her/talking to her/etc. every few pages. I went upstairs and she flipped out into one of her spazz attacks. I ignored her and tried to play WoW. I joined a raid and she continued to flip out. I continued ignoring.

She somehow managed to break through/get over two gates which are screwed into the wall, get upstairs, and she proceeded to pee/poo all over my hallway. It wasn't like she was sick and couldn't hold it, or just needed to go and it was a good spot, it was like she was marking her territory EVERYWHERE while whining and crying and attacking floors and walls.

I don't even know what to do at this point. I can't, and more importantly wont, give her the kind of attention she wants. I suggested putting her in a kennel to my mom, but she doesn't want to spend the extra money on it. I'm going to try giving her less attention and putting her outside so her freaking out wont destroy everything. Ween her off constant attention maybe.

]]> ~MidnightPredator More Job Crap http://MidnightPredator.deviantart.com/journal/25143641/ http://MidnightPredator.deviantart.com/journal/25143641/ Fri, 05 Jun 2009 13:06:48 PDT
My parents have been working cleaning an eye doctor's office for 10 years. Yeah. That's a long damn time.

They work their full time jobs and then go there every night until about 9 pm. The only day they had off was Sunday. I usually help out in the summer because, frankly, I can never find a job and I like to feel like I'm doing something useful.

My parents practically bend over backwards for these people.
Every day someone is supposed to clean their break room. They have their names posted. No one ever does, we always clean it for them. They will check off all their names to say they cleaned it, but I don't think anyone ever has.

The doctors and nurses eat all over where they aren't supposed to. They will eat at their desks, in examination rooms, anywhere. Their research team always leaves food sitting open on their desk. It attracts ant and, lately, mice. My parents will wrap up leftovers or throw away stuff they know has been gotten into along with a note. Then they clean up the mess.

All the employees have their own office/desk area and they're all full of little stuff. Toys, dolls, cards, plants, you name it. It was more cluttered on some desks then in my own room. And my parents parents would lift up all their stuff to clean under it, then dust/wash the stuff off if it needed, and put it all back exactly where it was.

They would clean out keyboards with compressed air and wipe off computer screens. They would lift the glass off the doctor's desks once a week to clean underneath the glass. They would clean inside of cabinets in the offices for crying out loud!

For a year my mom also did all the outside work like weeding, trimming bushes, etc. because they couldn't find a gardener. And she offered to do it all for no extra pay.

The building is barely hanging on. It needs to be renovated badly. The carpets are threadbare, the furniture is all just cheap plywood with laminate and the laminate is starting to come loose everywhere. They tried to fix it by using tape. Yeah... The wallpaper is so old it's yellowing, and the laminate in the bathrooms is so old that the colors are faded. It looks bad. No amount of cleaning in the world can fix it. For example, when I pointed out how dirty the carpets looked in places they had been worn down to nothing, my parents said in the 10 years they had been working there the company has not once paid to have the carpets deep cleaned. When my mother offered to do it for them if they paid the cost of renting the carpet cleaner, they said no. They didn't want to pay the cost.

About a year ago they hired a new building manager to fix all these problems. The building manager hasn't been doing anything. At all. She insisted on following my parents around for about a week while they cleaned after she initially said they did nothing. My mom keeps telling her that their building needs to be redone. She never listens. THen she starts calling my mother at work with complaints. Someone found a rag on their desk (No big deal, go put it in the closet with the cleaning supplies, we must have dropped it). The bathroom floors didn't look clean enough (Ok... let me drop everything I'm already doing at my day job and go fix it? We'll check to make sure our mob head probably needs to be changed)

My parents are not "bums" or "losers" like this lady treats them.

My mom works with a company where she is high enough up that she has a private office with a balcony in their main building. The company pays for a T1 connection for her to also work at home, her own laptop, blackberry, and company car. They send her out of the state all the time to handle clients who could cost the company millions of dollars to lose.

My step-father works as an RN in a mental health institute. He has two bachelors degrees, one in nursing and one in education. And he's seriously considering going back for a doctorate.

Just because someone is willing to clean and maybe even enjoys it doesn't mean they lack the ability to get another job or do something great with their lives.

Well finally it come to this week. The building manager accused my parents of stealing a 10 dollar gift card. Because the person who owned it couldn't find it and only remembered that it had been sitting on their desk at one point. So obviously those shady cleaning people took it and not a co-worker or anything.

My mother doesn't steal. She was an accountant with Steelcase for, I want to say 15 years before she was promoted to her current job.

I hope these people find horrible new cleaning services. I hope that no one cleans their break room so they have to do it themselves. I hope they come begging back for my parents in a week, though I know that wont happen. I at least hope they think about it.

]]> ~MidnightPredator Jobs - More Random Lyrics http://MidnightPredator.deviantart.com/journal/24855631/ http://MidnightPredator.deviantart.com/journal/24855631/ Wed, 20 May 2009 12:22:07 PDT I really would like a summer job this year. I can't decide if it's so I will have some decent spending money or because my mom wont leave me alone about it. Probably a combination of both.

I've always had an issue with being too shy when it comes to applying for jobs. It takes a lot for me to work up the courage just to walk in and ask if they are hiring, never mind the trauma of actually taking an application, filling it out, and bringing it back.

And then when I do all that and my application basically gets scrapped or never looked at, I kind of want to crawl in a hole and die. That's mentally a lot of work for me and no one cares.

I've applied at 3 places so far and haven't even gotten a single call back. Not even to say "no thanks." I know that I'll probably have to call them first or go in and ask if they've gotten around to it. That's what I had to do for my last job, after all. But damn I'm so... I don't know, paranoid? What's the worst they can do? Not hire me?

Well in my head they could unleash the hounds and chase me out of the store than post my face for the world to see as "that horrible chicken girl who can't get the guts to convince someone she's worth hiring."

Oh well.

I'll get over it and find a job eventually.

Or I wont. And I'll be broke.

Either way.

Have some more random lyrics.

Kim Leoni - Medicine lyrics

They say that your kiss is like a pill
Designed to change the way that I feel
For every heartache you gotta cure
That's why I put my trust in you

Everybody's looking for what they want
And everybody's looking for what they need
Gotta keep on looking for what I want
(Gotta keep on looking for what I want)

But I don't even know your name
So I will call you medicine
You can ease my pain

I don't wanna feel the same
Tonight I need your medicine
To put out the flame

I don't even know your name
So I will call you medicine
You can ease my pain

I don't wanna feel the same
Tonight I need your medicine
To put out the flame

(Medicine)
(Running through my veins)

But I don't even know your name
So I will call you medicine
You can ease my pain

I don't wanna feel the same
Tonight I need your medicine
To put out the flame

I don't even know your name
So I will call you medicine
You can ease my pain

I don't wanna feel the same
Tonight I need your medicine
To put out the flame

Trapped in emotions, you've got me rot
The cure that you give is not in the book
To you I'm addicted, I can't deny
To shake you off, I won't even try

Don't even know your name
So I will call you medicine
You can ease my pain

I don't wanna feel the same
Tonight I need your medicine
Running through my veins

But I don't even know your name
So I will call you medicine
You can ease my pain

I don't wanna feel the same
Tonight I need your medicine
To put out the flame

I don't even know your name
So I will call you medicine
You can ease my pain

I don't wanna feel the same
Tonight I need your medicine
Running through my veins

But I don't even know your name
So I will call you medicine
You can ease my pain

I don't wanna feel the same
Tonight I need your medicine
To put out the flame

(I'm listening to the raindropz radio edit. I think it's pretty awesome)

]]> ~MidnightPredator Need a New Journal - Random Lyrics Time http://MidnightPredator.deviantart.com/journal/24760578/ http://MidnightPredator.deviantart.com/journal/24760578/ Thu, 14 May 2009 19:50:53 PDT
I have the world's worst art block. But I did draw a bit today anyway.


Enter the room
You brighten the darkness my love
In moments with you
There is no ending or beginning to you

Move to the floor
Purpose combined my love
Like motion of stars
Dynamic symmetry in mind

Break my fall
I found what is missing inside you
Break my fall
Na na na na na na na
Break my fall
I found what is missing inside you
Break my fall
Na na na na na na na

Always with you
Connected by blood my love
A purpose fulfilled
You're my light in this dark, dark world

Unspoken within
I feel complete my love
In moments apart
Craving your light in the dark

Break my fall
I found what is missing inside you
Break my fall
Na na na na na na na
Break my fall
I found what is missing inside you
Break my fall
Na na na na na na na


- DJ Tiesto ft. BT

]]> ~MidnightPredator Snow... snow.... http://MidnightPredator.deviantart.com/journal/22116835/ http://MidnightPredator.deviantart.com/journal/22116835/ Mon, 22 Dec 2008 07:39:35 PST [link]) and end with a rant about how much I hate snow, winter, and cold.

So this journal is overdue for an update. We can start by talking about my dorm. I like living in my dorm, stacking up student loans that will probably drown me for the rest of my life. It's lively, there's always people around and stuff to do. Best of all, I don't pay for my heat. So I can feel free to leave my room at a nice consistent 90 or so.

But times are hard and money is short and living with my parents for break means I am freezing to death.

We were supposed to go to Texas with my entire family to visit my grandparents for the first time thanks to my uncle, but he decided it's every man woman and child for themselves since he doesn't want to pay anymore. And I don't have the money so I'm stuck alone in the cold for Christmas. BOOOOO.

There's also snow up to my shoulders. Mind you, I'm only 5 feet tall, but I had to shovel my way out of my house this morning. I didn't get far and I'm running out of places to put the snow that isn't my driveway.

So those are my general complaints, but to end on a slightly better note, I bred my dog before I got him fixed to try and solve his aggression problems. He bred with two purebreds and one mutt whose half mastiff and half st. Bernard. One of the girls didn't take (Don't know how that was possible...) and the other one's puppies were stillborn. But the mutt had a nice litter of 5 of them. 4 boys and a girl. I usually get pick of the litter or the cost of one puppy, which isn't much in this case since because of the stupid 25% St. Bernard, they're suddenly worth 100 dollars instead of 1000, but hey, 100 dollars is more then I've seen in awhile. I'm not complaining.

Plus I get to play with puppies now. They are so cute.

]]> ~MidnightPredator All... gone? http://MidnightPredator.deviantart.com/journal/20446181/ http://MidnightPredator.deviantart.com/journal/20446181/ Thu, 11 Sep 2008 20:25:46 PDT
I forgot I was in my dorm and not at school and just clicked without paying attention. Bam. Trojan.

It had my computer pretty screwed over and I went to safe mode and started using my flash drive to transfer files to my laptop. I managed to get all my videos, my music, and photoshop before it finally wouldn't start in anything but safe mode and even then it was a 50% chance it would do anything and it kept trying to restart on me.

So I reinstalled. Realized I had no tablet software, world of warcraft, microsoft office/word/powerpoint, all those things for school. I've had them for like 4 years since I got my computer, of course I don't have all the freaking serial keys. So I went and tried to get what I could. It's not like I pirate software on a daily basis, but hell, I bought the programs fair and square and because of one trojan siphoning viruses to my computer, I should have to pay for them again?! I don't think so. I couldn't afford that even if I wanted to, MSU is not cheap.

And then again I forgot that I was on my school computer. I got a warning from the computing services. Forgot the fuckers monitor my downloads. That's my second warning, the first one I got sending myself files to my desktop from my laptop. A third one and I have my privileges to use internet "reviewed." Aka, they go bye.

As if this weren't enough to really, REALLY make me angry, I look and I'm missing a huge chunk of my pictures. Apparently it transferred the folders, but left behind some of the files without telling. Which means that I'm missing everything I was working on, basically.

I have a test Tuesday in Ecology. I don't even know what I'm being tested on just yet.

*sigh* and the year started off so good.

That's it, I'm going to bubble island. I'll take two mango mochi ice creams, a peach smoothie with mango stars, and a spot on the squishy couch in front of the AC. Time to hit the books.

]]> ~MidnightPredator BC http://MidnightPredator.deviantart.com/journal/19722308/ http://MidnightPredator.deviantart.com/journal/19722308/ Fri, 01 Aug 2008 16:38:39 PDT
And I am in the BC. Last week I got 2nd. This week I'd like to do better. I know I have a handful of people I know on DA who play neopets. Sooo...


*prods the link* [link]

A Kougra vote if you have one is appreciated.





On a non neopet related note, I've been really happy with "furry" art styles lately and my friend has been telling me more and more about conventions him and his boyfriend go to all dressed up in fursuits and such and it actually sounds very fun! I can't believe how much about that sort of lifestyle I did not know.

And I love DJ Tiesto and have all his In Search of Sunrise CDs up to number 5, but I'm missing 4. My friend says it's really good, but I'm hesitant to spend money on it. Anyone hear it before?

]]> ~MidnightPredator Beautiful City http://MidnightPredator.deviantart.com/journal/18432805/ http://MidnightPredator.deviantart.com/journal/18432805/ Wed, 21 May 2008 14:51:26 PDT
On the road leading from the airport to Jonathan's house there is two bridges. One is old and one is new. The newer one reminds me a bit of Mackinaw. He says the older one collapsed 3 times now and doesn't drive on it. I'm quite content with that fact.

The roads are carved into the same rock that makes up the Niagra Falls. It gives you the feeling of driving into something older, something that transcends your short life span. Combined with the mountainous skyline and the wide, sprawling land, it makes you feel tiny. Insignificant.

Jonathan drove me around Levis. The streets are narrow, old, the lines painted on them faded with time and the road themselves cracked. He tells me he has a friend who at one time lived in one of the older houses he was showing me and the city government will not let you renovate or update the houses for fear of losing their culture and the tourism it provides.

He brought me to a park. It's a small park as parks go with a picnic table or two and it is built on the edge of yet another cliff of the same Niagra-esque rocks overlooking the St. Lawrence. On the other side was Quebec City. From across the river on that cliff in that park I could see for miles and miles the shining lights form below. I've been to Chicago, to New York, to Miami, to Texas, to Mexico. But every place I see is beautiful in its own way and none awe me quite the same as others. Chicago is tall and looming. Quiet at times. Dark. Mysterious. New York is loud, bustling, and all the buildings and streets at such incredible angles the mind can barely comprehend the sheer size.

But Quebec. It's wide and open. It's beautiful and clear. It sparkles and shines and spreads as far as I could see.

I watched a ferry traveling across the river with the lights sparkling off the water and listened to ghost stories in the cold, breezy night. Jonathan's heavily accented voice bounced around the pavilllion we were in and made my mind wander with it.

This is definitely a different country and it has things that make it magical. And people who make it magical.

They talk differently, move differently, live differently, It's so hard to explain what it feels like to have French and English meld around you in a certain harmony and to look out of the back yard to a skyline that goes on far longer then the one you are used to and ends in hills and mountains rather then stopping 100 feet away with a tree or a building or a lake.

I'm enjoying my trip.
It is just one of those days where you enjoy life to its fullest. And I want to share.
So here I am like a loser. Typing it all up. Heh. I rock ;)

]]> ~MidnightPredator Vote? http://MidnightPredator.deviantart.com/journal/18031884/ http://MidnightPredator.deviantart.com/journal/18031884/ Sat, 26 Apr 2008 00:56:47 PDT
I don't like to ask for votes on DA, but Lupe competition this week is ridiculous on neopets so...

Vote for Atinatina?

[link]

*flops around helplessly*

On another note, my attempt to use the Art Gallery to make neopoints has been a complete success with my Cybunny entry today giving me 5 wins and enough np to paint my hissi Ghost and buy him clothes and a background.

]]> ~MidnightPredator I got a tablet. http://MidnightPredator.deviantart.com/journal/12180689/ http://MidnightPredator.deviantart.com/journal/12180689/ Wed, 14 Mar 2007 12:31:58 PDT
]]> ~MidnightPredator Senior Pictures http://MidnightPredator.deviantart.com/journal/10259590/ http://MidnightPredator.deviantart.com/journal/10259590/ Mon, 02 Oct 2006 12:50:59 PDT After a long time where my parents nagged me to get my senior pictures I finally went out spontaniously with my boyfriend and his dad and got them done. Apparantly his dad was a photographer for "a billion and a half" years before he took up computers as his main hobby. He even used to have a dark room. Well, since I don't mind him as much as I would mind strangers following around making me pose and stuff, I said shure why not.

Well, first we couldn't think of any poses it was either stand or sit. The camera then ran out of batteries twice and then it was too bright and I couldn't keep my eyes open and then the camera wouldn't work. Yeah, it has this thing about not working on auto so you have to manually adjust all the colors and that ended up going bad. I had a lot of photos with animals that never turned out just because he didn't have the time to adjust it. There was one with my dog, one with a butterly that landed on me when I was in some flowers, one with a frog I found in the bushes, some random horse that walked up when I was in front of his field, and these cats that hopped on my lap when I was on a swing. Sigh.

[link]
So those are the ones he decided to edit up. Personally I think I could do a better photoshop job and fix up some of the ones that "didn't turn out" but it's hard to convince him to let me do it. Heh.

If anyone has any ideas on which ones are best or what can be done to make them maybe more colorfull, I'd really appreciate it. I'm desperate here to make them look good hehe ><

]]> ~MidnightPredator New avatar http://MidnightPredator.deviantart.com/journal/8504233/ http://MidnightPredator.deviantart.com/journal/8504233/ Sun, 23 Apr 2006 19:26:43 PDT ~MidnightPredator *sigh* http://MidnightPredator.deviantart.com/journal/7294368/ http://MidnightPredator.deviantart.com/journal/7294368/ Mon, 12 Dec 2005 17:53:00 PST :new:

I need a new avatar...

:nod: ]]> ~MidnightPredator Devious Journal Entry http://MidnightPredator.deviantart.com/journal/7185342/ http://MidnightPredator.deviantart.com/journal/7185342/ Wed, 30 Nov 2005 12:30:37 PST ~MidnightPredator RWAR!!!!!! Haha, scared ya. http://MidnightPredator.deviantart.com/journal/6496068/ http://MidnightPredator.deviantart.com/journal/6496068/ Tue, 13 Sep 2005 16:19:31 PDT
*sigh* I really do appreciate my weekends now, though. ]]> ~MidnightPredator Devious Journal Entry http://MidnightPredator.deviantart.com/journal/6278213/ http://MidnightPredator.deviantart.com/journal/6278213/ Sat, 20 Aug 2005 09:33:53 PDT
Indeed, I do support jark.
:katana: :jarksaber: ]]> ~MidnightPredator I have a star! http://MidnightPredator.deviantart.com/journal/5931848/ http://MidnightPredator.deviantart.com/journal/5931848/ Thu, 14 Jul 2005 10:25:38 PDT
Mood: Bouncy Don't rightly know..
Listening to: "Happy?" by Mudvayne
Reading: In The Forests of the Night
Watching: None... but a movie option is so cool

Well when I got online to check my messages... BAM free week of subscription. How fun. So much new crap to mess around with... *must mess with EVERYTHING* hehehe....

And I have a footer too! ]]> ~MidnightPredator Chickens http://MidnightPredator.deviantart.com/journal/5893419/ http://MidnightPredator.deviantart.com/journal/5893419/ Sun, 10 Jul 2005 09:26:04 PDT
A) I got a job
B) My german shepherd got hit by a car and died
C) I got a car
D) I got my liscence
E) I've got a boyfriend
F) Said boyfriend got me adobe photoshop cs2 and I lost all my brushes because said boyfriend didn't know that I didn't keep a backup folder of brushes
G) Said boyfriend also bought me my own World of Warcraft account and I've been playing it none stop. Level 41 night elf druid playing on Uldum if anyone cares. (doubtfull)
H) I've been working on a stupid website of mine called [link]
I) My printer is broken. My scanner is connected to my printer. Therefore, the scanner is broken so I can't scan my lineart. And I can't draw on the computer. ]]> ~MidnightPredator Lawn Flamingos Pwn http://MidnightPredator.deviantart.com/journal/5158870/ http://MidnightPredator.deviantart.com/journal/5158870/ Fri, 22 Apr 2005 14:14:26 PDT
If you play neopets, hello to you! *waves* I'm, _undead_whisper_
If you don't, click here to join ----> [link]

Uh, haven't written anything in awhile.

My Kougra Day picture won a spot in the neopets art gallery.

My mage on WoW leveled up to lvl 17. Not like anyone cares or anything. xD

Anyway... that's about all. ]]> ~MidnightPredator I think I died! http://MidnightPredator.deviantart.com/journal/5104762/ http://MidnightPredator.deviantart.com/journal/5104762/ Sun, 17 Apr 2005 01:40:49 PDT
What else is there? Hmm... my Yurble on neopets took 9th in species about of somewhere around 35 pets, which I thought was pretty good because I didn't advertise much. Anyway, I'm taking a break and waiting until I have time to actually advertise before I enter again.

If you play neopets, hello to you! *waves*
If you don't, click here to join ----> [link]

Uh, haven't written anything in awhile.

I just learned how to do animations about 2 hours ago. My new avatar is a result of that. *pokes avatar* Yup. New. Bwuahahaha!

Eeep, my boyfriend got me playing World of Warcraft. Eeep, what is it with RPGs that's so addicting? Does anyone else who plays WoW find that they can't take two steps away from the computer? Not even to go to the bathroom?

Anyway... that's about all. ]]> ~MidnightPredator Alright, so you don't want to be my pet... http://MidnightPredator.deviantart.com/journal/5039100/ http://MidnightPredator.deviantart.com/journal/5039100/ Sat, 09 Apr 2005 00:19:07 PDT
I got new glasses today. More bad news. I'm right down in the -7 range. The doctor was all like, wow, you have the same eye sight as a 43 year old male. That's bad. Hey, month is save your eyesight month, isn't it funny you were born in march. Blah blah blah. Shut up doctor, can't you see I don't want to talk to you, I want to go ruin my eyes on my computer.

What else is there? Hmm... my lupe on neopets won first in species, so now I've got a new pet in.

Click here to vote for my current pet----> [link]
Click here to join neopets----> [link]

Uh, haven't written anything in awhile.

Eeep, my boyfriend got me playing World of Warcraft. Eeep, what is it with RPGs that's so addicting? Anyway... that's about all. ]]> ~MidnightPredator Neopets? Ahhhh, BC! http://MidnightPredator.deviantart.com/journal/5010527/ http://MidnightPredator.deviantart.com/journal/5010527/ Tue, 05 Apr 2005 19:24:00 PDT [link] to sign up

If you play neopets, click here to vote for me in the BC ----> [link]

Aaaaand, that's about all I have to say. I'm on spring break. Yay. My cat just died. Boooo. I haven't updated fictionpress in a lifetime. ]]> ~MidnightPredator Oh, look what I found... http://MidnightPredator.deviantart.com/journal/4904368/ http://MidnightPredator.deviantart.com/journal/4904368/ Thu, 24 Mar 2005 21:03:01 PST ~MidnightPredator Devious Journal Entry http://MidnightPredator.deviantart.com/journal/4898352/ http://MidnightPredator.deviantart.com/journal/4898352/ Thu, 24 Mar 2005 08:48:17 PST
Other news than that, um, there are people you should check out, they are under the list of people I'm watching. *points towards the bottom of her little pag-y thingy*

I updated fictionpress.

Right now, I'm trying to help my friend think of an copy (article thing) she can write for yearbook about CFC. Which leads me to think, why is it that Christian clubs can meet everywhere, but not other clubs. There's supposed to be laws keeping religion out of schools, but they don't seem to mind Christian groups. What would happen, though, if I decided to start, oh, say, The Drudic Rune Reading Club, and we would get together and read runes. Or maybe a Wicca Club, and we could pray to the great Goddess at lunch. Or maybe even a Cult Meeting and we could murder cats. I bet people would protest that. I bet no one would let that happen. It seems that Christian's are accepted at school, even though there's no supposed to be any religion at all. What's the deal with that?! ]]> ~MidnightPredator Errr, rawr. http://MidnightPredator.deviantart.com/journal/4725951/ http://MidnightPredator.deviantart.com/journal/4725951/ Fri, 04 Mar 2005 09:03:00 PST ~MidnightPredator Characters http://MidnightPredator.deviantart.com/journal/4700701/ http://MidnightPredator.deviantart.com/journal/4700701/ Tue, 01 Mar 2005 09:31:23 PST [link]


And I think now I'm going to draw one of my own characters. So yeah. This is what happens when school closes and people get bored. :S You get bad anime. ^_^ ]]> ~MidnightPredator First Day http://MidnightPredator.deviantart.com/journal/4694785/ http://MidnightPredator.deviantart.com/journal/4694785/ Mon, 28 Feb 2005 16:28:23 PST ~MidnightPredator