http://search.deviantart.com/?q=by:MoCaW&section=today deviantART RSS for by:MoCaW en-us Copyright 2009, deviantART.com Sat, 05 Dec 2009 21:37:37 PST deviantART.com http://blogs.law.harvard.edu/tech/rss http://s.deviantart.com/minish/widgets/apple-touch-icon-precomposed.png http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/28117034/ http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/28117034/ Mon, 02 Nov 2009 23:21:08 PST [link]

Yup. I'm doing it again this year. Another shot at writing 50,000 words. God help us all.

]]> *MoCaW http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/26877313/ http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/26877313/ Fri, 28 Aug 2009 14:12:00 PDT [link]

Something to think about.

]]> *MoCaW http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/26272494/ http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/26272494/ Thu, 30 Jul 2009 09:20:14 PDT
]]> *MoCaW http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/25763655/ http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/25763655/ Sun, 05 Jul 2009 22:34:04 PDT
1. The economy is tight, and even Expo is feeling it. A little less free swag, a little less extravagance. The love is still there.

2. OMG Da Capo translated into English AAAAAAAAAAGH Moe-Sempai!

3. This was my first time seeing the AMV contest. Quite fun. Seeing Dead Fantasy before hand also awesome. Non-Spoilered verdict: Tifa is badass.

4. Bought two figures on a whim my first day there. Apparently I picked up two fairly rare figures (Gift Saber, loose hair edition, and Ignis Yamato, transparent hair and clothing) that someone who is more knowledgeable on them claims are like the holy grail for collectors of those particular characters. . . who will probably scream and tear their hair out because I actually intend to open the boxes. . .

5. Betrayal at the House on the Hill is great fun.

6. Note to self: put some effort into next year's costume idea.

7. If at first you get bored at the con, put on your ninja mask and start skulking.

8. The Japanese have apparently put quite a bit of thought into mechanical aids for masturbation, if the Mangagamer booth is any indication.

9. Increased presence of dakimakuras and first sighting of erotic bedsheets at this con. Half expecting to see an otaku carrying his waifu around next year.

10. Beef Jerky is good.

]]> *MoCaW http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/25547297/ http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/25547297/ Thu, 25 Jun 2009 17:04:11 PDT
And now Ed McMahon, Michael Jackson, and Farah Fawcett are dead too. What the fuck.

]]> *MoCaW http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/25480131/ http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/25480131/ Mon, 22 Jun 2009 18:04:56 PDT
Taken from

For each of the 15 first people answering this journal I will put his/her avatar and links to three deviations I like most from his/her gallery on the list.

If you answer, you'll have to do the same on your journal, putting me on the first place, completing this way the list with 15 people.

If, after 1 week, I have not gotten 15 responses, I will be filling out the rest of the list with random deviants from my watch list.

1. Lokotei
[link] Jade Tattoo 2
[link] Never Ever Ever Do This
[link] Treasure on the Mountain
For Lokotei I tried to choose a variety of deviations, ranging across her range, from her photography to her fanart to her designs.

2.
3.
4.
5.
6.
7.
8.
9.
10.
11.
12.
13.
14.
15.

]]> *MoCaW http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/25399636/ http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/25399636/ Thu, 18 Jun 2009 16:55:45 PDT [link]



Sorry, got something in both my eyes.

]]> *MoCaW http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/25340292/ http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/25340292/ Mon, 15 Jun 2009 22:26:58 PDT
Anyway. Part of what I did was go through the huge filing cabinet of papers that have been building up for nigh on three decades of life, and start splitting it into things I need to keep, and things I can throw away. My old pay stubs? Keep. My old high school term paper? Shred. My old tax returns? Keep. My old cell phone bills for a phone I don't have any more? Shred.

Sitting on my bed with those manila folders around me arranged in a circle, I opened up the bottom drawer of the file cabinet and pulled out a dark brown collapsing folder. Scrawled across the front in black sharpie pen, in my own familiar messy handwriting, were the words "Law School Applications."

My stomach churned, and in that moment, I left Pasadena of June 2009, and fell through my memories back to San Fernando of June 2000. Nine years ago, sitting on a different bed in a different room staring at a different computer screen, I made a decision that, in some ways, has shaped my life since.

That was the day that I decided to go to GW Law School in Washington DC. I would pack my bags and leave my friends, my family, my city all behind, and head off to a big adventure on the other side of the country. I would go to law school. I would get my law degree. And I would do it all before I turned 23.

It's been nine years, and I'm way older than 23 now, and I don't have a law degree. Looking back, you can probably see why I don't. I never had a plan beyond "go to law school and get my JD." The reason, to be frank, was that it was never my plan. If I could show you the folders sitting on my bed right now, one thing that you will notice is that although the writing on the front is my dynamic scrawl, the writing on the tabs for each school, in which have very neatly been arranged the application papers by school, region, and ranking, are in a precise, all-caps hand. The hand of an engineer.

My father's hand.

I'm not certain that you, the dear readers, the strangers who read these words, understand exactly what those words mean to me. To some, I'm sure, a father's hand is seen as a kind, loving hand. A hand that reaches down and lifts you up when you fall. A hand that holds tightly when the tears come. A hand that guides and teaches.

My father's hand was all of these things, but in my memory, rushing back across the near-decade of life, I remember it mostly as an upraised hand, holding a magazine, brought down upon my forehead, punctuated my angry cries.

"What the hell is wrong with you?"

"Lazy bastard!"

"Why do you waste your time like this?"

"Why do you waste my money?"

"What kind of son acts like this?"

"When are you going to grow up?"

Bam. Bam. Bam. Each sentence punctuated with a downwards blow from the rolled-up magazine or the DVD case or the book. . . or whatever the angry, rage-filled man standing in front of me first came to hand to deliver his hate-filled strikes. Each strike never hurting my body, more than a brief flash of pain, but each word lashing out a little bit and delivering another stripe to the bare back of my teenage soul.

It was my father's hand who wrote the names on those folder tabs, my father's hand who typed up and printed out the mailing labels I see in those manila folders. It was my father's hand who sent me on my way across the country, but it was my life that was damaged because of it. Nine years later, I am still paying off those student loans, for that abortive year of schooling that I never wanted. Never should have done.

Don't get me wrong, it wasn't all his fault. I never studied. I wasted my time frittered away on the internet. Lost in books and comics. I should have quit after that first year, should have come home. and told my parents that this was not my path.

I never had the courage.

Nine years. My God. Where does the time go.

I came back home depressed and tired, my failure weighing heavily on my mind. I tried to recover, but failure met me at every turn. I tried to teach. I was a lousy fucking teacher and I rushed into a program that I never should have applied for: with absolutely no experience, I tried to pull off a rigorous, advanced class where I would teach as an intern while getting my credentials. It was a mistake. I still feel guilt over the year I wasted in the lives of my students, who had to put up with an inco... ]]> *MoCaW http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/25125288/ http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/25125288/ Thu, 04 Jun 2009 12:58:12 PDT
[link]

WTF.

]]> *MoCaW http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/25094588/ http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/25094588/ Tue, 02 Jun 2009 18:20:19 PDT
Then I saw people getting out of their cars and running to the side of the street, and I realized that someone else already had.

Turns out that someone had just hit a pedestrian and sped off, hitting another car on the way, if the SUV with the spider-webbed right windshield was any indication. The girl, who'd been hit, was laying on the asphalt. Two other people were talking to her. There was quite a bit of blood.

I pulled into a small parking lot and hit my blinkers. . . grabbed my cell phone and headed out. There was already a small crowd gathered. "Did anyone call 911!?" "Yeah, they're calling," a man said, pointing to a young black lady chatting into her cell phone.

I couldn't think of much else to do. Traffic was being backed up, so I walked them around the accident site as best I could. "It's okay, honey," I heard one of the two people saying. "It's gonna be all right. I know it hurts, don't look at it."

The cops arrived just around that time. I left.

I don't know if that girl's all right. I don't know if she lived or died. Maybe I should have stayed and found out. I don't know that it could have done any good. I don't know if I'd like the answer.

All I'm trying to say, I guess, is to be careful driving out there. There is nothing else that we modern humans do that is more likely to kill ourselves or another human being than barreling around in a one-ton hunk of metal at speeds upwards of 60 mph.

I know a bunch of people in Pasadena who were soberly reminded of that fact in graphic detail today.

]]> *MoCaW http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/24645321/ http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/24645321/ Fri, 08 May 2009 02:01:01 PDT
Oh. My. God.

As I walked out, I could only think of one thing to say: "It was fun." And I don't just mean that it was thrilling and exciting, because it was that too. No. It was FUN.

There were moments when my inner Trek Grognard stroked his neckbeard and hugged his Spock ears and complained that Star Trek doesn't work that way, that Warp Nacelles don't have nozzles and you can't have a single warp nacelle on a star ship, you need to attach them in pairs and they need to have 50% line of sight to each other, and oh my god photon torpedoes travel at warp speed, how the hell are you supposed to. . .

And then his two brothers, "Sense of Fun" and "Shut the Hell up, You Nerd, It's Only a Movie" roll their eyes, duct-tape "Trek Grognard" to an office chair, and throw him in the closet, pausing only to open the door again and duct-tape his mouth shut when he continues to whine in the background.

See it again? Of course I will.

]]> *MoCaW http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/22686017/ http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/22686017/ Tue, 20 Jan 2009 02:52:55 PST
-----

“Hide under the altar,” she said softly. “And whatever happens, don't come out. Don't try to help me, please. You'll only make things worse.”

“Why do we have to fight?” I whimpered. “We can run. We can go to the police. We can go for help, we can do something, please!”

“The police can't help,” she replied, gently, taking off her tattered green overcoat and laying it over me. “No worldly authority can. And running. . . I can't run.” She smiled, in s sick manner. “Alex. Have you ever had to protect something with your life? Have you ever looked at something and thought to yourself that you would die. . . or kill. . . to protect it?”

I had no answer.

“Some day, when you do, you will understand,” she said, leaning down and kissing my forehead. “When that day comes, remember this: don't hesitate. Act.”

The howling grew louder. The sounds of the growling hounds echoed through the empty church. She stood. “Just wait. . . and watch,” she said, softly. “If I live, then watch how I fight. . . if I die, then remember how I died. Either way, let this be my final lesson to you.”

She pulled up her skirt, and there was something duct-taped to the outside of her thigh. As she slowly peeled off the tape, I could see that it was a chef's knife, a long, wicked looking knife with a black melanite handle and a tapered blade, the same kind that Mom used to cut up meat and vegetables for dinner. She peeled the tape off the blade and threw it aside.

Then, with a single, smooth motion, she ran the blade over her left arm, the one with all the scars, drawing blood.

The double doors opened, and the darkness intruded. She swung the blade, splattering her blood in a broad arc in front of her, shouted something I didn't understand, something that sounded like a lyrical note echoing in the darkness. The hounds answered back, a feral roar of slavering, primal hunger.

She stepped over the line of blood, and the hounds closed in.

-----
Between Life and Death
Between Waking and Dream
Between Love and Hate
Between Heaven and Hell

I stand between Light and Shadow
Calling on the pact between my blood and thine
Let the price be paid
Let the guardian awake

]]> *MoCaW http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/22322848/ http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/22322848/ Thu, 01 Jan 2009 02:46:57 PST Shall auld acquaintaince be forgot and days of auld lang syne?
And days of auld lang syne my friend, the days of auld lang syne
We'll take a cup of kindness yet
For auld lang syne

Happy New YEar!

]]> *MoCaW http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/22284491/ http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/22284491/ Tue, 30 Dec 2008 16:55:26 PST
2. Reaper Miniatures bag with four foam trays for the transport of miniatures to gaming.

3. DVD of "Amazon Women on the Moon."

4. DVD of "Flogging Molly: The Documentary."

5. Calvin Klein jacket with hood, and the theft prevention tag still attached. O.o

6. Various and sundry books, CDs, and such.



]]> *MoCaW http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/22129741/ http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/22129741/ Mon, 22 Dec 2008 20:17:03 PST
Older than sin, and his beard could grow no whiter. He wanted to die.

The dwarfish natives of the Arctic caverns did not speak his language, but conversed in their own, twittering tongue, conducted incomprehensible rituals, when they were not actually working in the factories.

Once very year they forced him, sobbing & protesting, into Endless Night. During the journey he would stand near every child in the world, leave one of the dwarves’ invisible gifts by its bedside. The children slept, frozen into time.

He envied Prometheus and Loki, Sisyphus and Judas. His punishment was harsher.

Ho.

Ho.

Ho.

-----

Merry Christmas Or whatever you celebrate. . . or don't celebrate. . . okay, fine, have a nice day.

]]> *MoCaW http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/21721708/ http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/21721708/ Fri, 28 Nov 2008 21:06:35 PST
[link] - My Nanowrimo 2008 Profile

[link]

Finished! 56,467 words. And now comes the hard part. . . editing!

]]> *MoCaW http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/21531359/ http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/21531359/ Mon, 17 Nov 2008 09:07:37 PST
[link] - My Nanowrimo 2008 Profile

Sometimes, I think I'd like to go back to the beginning of my life and relive it all again, but knowing what I do now.

Then I wonder, "What if I already have, and this is my second try?"

]]> *MoCaW http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/21451649/ http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/21451649/ Wed, 12 Nov 2008 09:52:39 PST
[link] - My Nanowrimo 2008 Profile

Taken from [link] - A few of my favorite things that start with "C"

(Just for fun, I'm going to do this in the style of Julie Andrews)

music by Coulton and games by b, Cliffy,
glasses of milk with Chocolate Chip Cookies,
Chicken Caesar Salads with parmesan Cheese,
These are a few of my favorite "C"s. . .

. . . hmmm. . .

Comic book panels painted in four colors,
hot Crescent rolls with a lil' pat of butter,
Cute girls in short flippy skirts that I see,
these things u like all happen to start with "C"

. . . this is getting hard.

when the A's bite
and the B's sting
when i'm feeling sad
i think about a few of my favorite C's
and then i don't feel so bad.

. . . that was lame.

Crab Cakes and Crab legs and spicy shrimp Cocktails,
Computers and Concerts and Coats with long Coattails.
Calligraphy words written so gracefully
these are a few of my favorite "C's"

Almost done. . .

Candy bars, Candy Corn, i just like Candy,
Camping and Crosswords are all fine and dandy,
but when i go to the ocean and swim
i must admit that of all these, I most like the "sea."

. . . that was horrible.

when the A's bite
and the B's sting
when i'm feeling sad
i think about a few of my favorite C's
and then i don't feel so bad.

-----

So if anyone else wants in on the meme, just ask in a response to this journal and I'll give you a letter.

Just don't try and do it in a song. It's really annoying. -_-

]]> *MoCaW http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/21328751/ http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/21328751/ Tue, 04 Nov 2008 21:05:56 PST
On a side note: I think John McCain deserves better fans than he had. I watched his concession speech, and that man had class exuding from every pore. But the audience was a bunch of braying jackasses.

Seriously, John, you are too damn good for the GOP.

EDIT: [link] I laughed for ten minutes straight.\

EDIT 2: [link]

EDIT 3: [link]

]]> *MoCaW http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/21264738/ http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/21264738/ Sat, 01 Nov 2008 12:18:55 PDT [link]

So yes, I'm actually doing it this year. You can find my information here: [link]

My novel? It's honestly a bit silly, one of those swords-and-sorcery fantasy stories where all the guys have swarthy thews and all the women have voluptuous contours. Or not. We'll see how it goes.

EDIT: As of tonight, I have broken the 20,000 word mark!

EDIT: As of 11-13-08: 25,000 words, 50 pages!

EDIT: 11-18-08: 30,000!

]]> *MoCaW http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/21253165/ http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/21253165/ Fri, 31 Oct 2008 17:32:56 PDT [link] Mira, Female Rogue: 19 Faves, 70 views in 19 hours.

[link] Marcus, Male Fighter: 4 Faves, 31 views in 22 hours

[link] Rathis, Male Cleric: 5 Faves, 51 views in 2 days, 22 hours.

[link] Kayla, Female Paladin in full plate armor: 14 Faves, 138 views in 5 days

[link] Kayla, Female Paladin wearing a nice dress: 20 Faves, 225 views in 8 days.

Hmmmmmmmm.

]]> *MoCaW http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/20983906/ http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/20983906/ Tue, 14 Oct 2008 10:47:04 PDT
A novel concept, and his heart longed to join in. His fingers lingered over the ebony tiles of his keyboard. To live, for a week, to live and to act as a character in his own small story. . . the thoughts of such a daring venture brought him exhil. . . ex. . . excitement!

And yet, would it even mean anything? His eyes lingered over his activity board. Months and months during which he had barely, if ever, done anything with his DevArt site. What glorious tales had he posted, what feats of artistic virtuosity? The very emptiness of his activity board seemed to mock him, like the leering faces of a third-grade classroom staring up at a hapless substitute teacher.

But nothing ventured is nothing gained. He threw his gauntlet into the arena and awaited the response of those who cast their eyes upon him. Silence was his only answer. With a shrug, he did return to his life as it was.

Oh well, at least it should last him a few days entertainment.

]]> *MoCaW http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/20897249/ http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/20897249/ Wed, 08 Oct 2008 20:34:56 PDT
Apparently, quite a lot, if [link] is any indication.

You can find my account here: [link]

And as a little bonus: the first ficlet I wrote there that I'm really proud of:

-----


When I was a little boy, I was afraid of monsters. They always lurked in the dark places where the light didn’t reach. It didn’t matter how many times my father shone a flashlight into the dark corners of my closet: I knew, the moment that the light was gone, the monsters would come back.

And they always did.

When I grew up, I learned why: the real monsters don’t hide in dark corners and closets. The real monsters are the ones that live behind your eyes, in the darkness of your mind, and it takes more than a flashlight to send them away.

You’ll find what you’re looking for in my basement. She’s still alive, but the others are long dead. (I’ve kept their teeth in ziploc bags in my file cabinet. Maybe you can identify them from dental records.) She hasn’t eaten in days, and she’s lost a lot of blood, but she might still live if you hurry.

All I ask is that you leave the light on when you go. This prison cell is very dark, and I’m afraid that the monsters will come out when you leave.

-----

]]> *MoCaW http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/20420119/ http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/20420119/ Wed, 10 Sep 2008 09:26:27 PDT
If you don't know, a Mary Sue is a fictional character, usually a thinly veiled representative of the author, who can basically do no wrong. A Woogie is a Mary Sue type that's meant to evoke feelings of sympathy and pity. Think Lucas from Earthbound.

The Republican Party's basic tactic with Sarah Palin is simple:

1. Wait for the Obama camp to say something that could be contrived as offensive to Palin.

2. Paint them as ogres for "attacking" her because she's a woman/her kid has Downs/she's from Alaska.

3. Sit back and watch the Democrats flounder around like fish on the bottom of a Swift Boat.

That sort of thing might win elections, but is it good for the country? I don't know.

All I know is, Downs kid or no Downs kid, if McCain is elected, Palin is second in charge. And am I willing to see her in the Oval Office?

I don't know.

I'm not sure if people understand just how precarious the American economy is right now. Two of the biggest American banks had to be bailed out by the government recently. [link]

Do you know how much in debts those banks owe? 3 TRILLION dollars.

That's right. 3 TRILLION. Not billion. TRILLION.

That looks like this: 3,000,000,000,000. Twelve Zeros.

That's more than the NATIONAL debt of any country aside from the USA.

That's more than the National economy of many countries.

And that represents investments from all around the world. Investments that the US economy relies on to keep its capitalist wheels turning.

Given that the entire domestic security of the US stands on the edge of a knife, can we really afford any doubt about whether the prospective President of the US tried to build a bridge capable of moving four million people to an island whose only major feature was an airport that brought in a quarter million people a day? ttp://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gravina_Island_Bridge

I really don't know. But I know it's more important, to me, than Sarah Palin's personal drama with her son.

I have no idea whether Obama's remark was meant to attack Palin. All I know is that the longer these issues get dragged out, the more this whole election turns into a farce at a time when the real issues get more and more deadly serious.

]]> *MoCaW http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/20304456/ http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/20304456/ Wed, 03 Sep 2008 09:08:56 PDT
Until Monday, when he died

[link]

*sighs*

]]> *MoCaW http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/19688950/ http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/19688950/ Wed, 30 Jul 2008 21:03:48 PDT Happy Sushi to me
Happy New Running Shoes and Awesome T-Shirts and Other coolness
Happy Birthday to me

]]> *MoCaW http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/19660446/ http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/19660446/ Tue, 29 Jul 2008 12:08:03 PDT [link]

So I'm at work today, thinking about lunch, when the ground starts moving.

"Oh," I think. "Earthquake. Well, if it's just a small one, we'll sit it out and then. . . hmmmm. . . that's getting kinda big."

About then I look over to my left, and my manager is standing up at her desk yelling, "What do we do, do we leave, where do we go, WHERE IS SUSANNA!?" Susanna being our office manager who knows all the emergency protocols and such.

That's when I decided now would be a good time to do the duck and cover thing we learned in elementary school.

Long story short: no damage, it was a slow, rolling quake, the kind that moves around a lot, but not violently. Pasadena, at least, is fine, I'm fine, we're all fine here.

]]> *MoCaW http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/19475798/ http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/19475798/ Sat, 19 Jul 2008 01:56:54 PDT
Either way, it's a great three hours in the theatre. Heath Ledger is frankly terrifying as the Joker.

Hell, the way things are going, I'd trust Christopher Nolan to do a Batman movie even if he said he would put Bat-Mite in it

]]> *MoCaW http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/19419145/ http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/19419145/ Tue, 15 Jul 2008 23:05:35 PDT
Surprisingly dark, surprisingly touching, and, of course, filled with Pixar goodness.

I swear, they just can't make a bad movie. It's impossible.

]]> *MoCaW http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/19264217/ http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/19264217/ Mon, 07 Jul 2008 22:35:32 PDT
He'll be okay, we think: he's stable, and actually responding to stimulus, but the doctors are keeping him down until he recovers more from the surgery, thank god. Prayers for him and his family are very much appreciated.

]]> *MoCaW http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/19244623/ http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/19244623/ Sun, 06 Jul 2008 22:49:58 PDT [link]

]]> *MoCaW http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/19197021/ http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/19197021/ Fri, 04 Jul 2008 06:40:19 PDT
Super Ninja Appreciate formation. . . GO!

RIGHT!

Target: ANIME EXPO!

RIGHT!

Ninjas, VANISH!

*poof!*

]]> *MoCaW http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/19083955/ http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/19083955/ Fri, 27 Jun 2008 21:58:33 PDT
Alternatively, you may also at some point see a rather mopey looking guy dressed in a black suit-and-tie with cat ears. In that case, you probably want to thwap him in the face and tell him to cheer up, emo boy.

]]> *MoCaW http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/18907750/ http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/18907750/ Wed, 18 Jun 2008 08:48:01 PDT
Good for them, though, they deserve this ring.

]]> *MoCaW http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/18544240/ http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/18544240/ Wed, 28 May 2008 13:37:57 PDT
I was invited to attend the SCA's Potrero War last weekend, with some friends of mine. You can see the photos I took here:

[link]

I also took some videos, but I'm not sure how to get them up on Photobucket. Anyone with better Photobucket Fu who can give some advice?

]]> *MoCaW http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/17407296/ http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/17407296/ Wed, 19 Mar 2008 08:50:08 PDT "Somewhere in me is a curiosity sensor. I want to know what's over the next hill. You know, people can live longer without food than without information. Without information, you'd go crazy."

[link]

Sir Arthur C. Clarke, the author of the novel "2001: A Space Odyssey" and its accompanying movie directed by Stanley Kubrick, passed away this morning in his home in Sri Lanka.

It's a bit hard for me given that Clarke's writings were one of my first introductions to science fiction. I did my 6th grade book report on 2001: A Space Odyssey. Rendezvous with Rama and its sequels saw me through my teenage years. Fountains of Paradise introduced me to the idea of the orbital elevator. The first time I ever heard the words "Mandelbrot Set," it was in the book "Ghost from the Grand Banks."

CLARKE'S THREE LAWS:

1. "When a distinguished but elderly scientist states that something is possible, he is almost certainly right. When he states that something is impossible, he is very probably wrong."

2. "The only way of discovering the limits of the possible is to venture a little way past them into the impossible."

3. "Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic."

Farewell, old man. Hope Stanley Kubrick's waiting for you on the other side.

P.S. Dear all other celebrities who touched and shaped my childhood: none of you are allowed to die for another two or three years. Signed, the 10 year old Albert

]]> *MoCaW http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/17178673/ http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/17178673/ Tue, 04 Mar 2008 11:38:15 PST Suddenly, things didn't hurt so much. The pain was gone, and the darkness as well. The touch of his loved ones' hands faded away, as did the pain.

He was free.

He wasn't sure when it happened, just that it did. There was a burst of light, and a feeling of utter calmness, and then a moment of understanding.

He looked back only once, but already, what had been was fading away. A part of him longed to return, but a voice whispered to him that his time there was over. Something new lay ahead.

But first, there was something he wanted to do.

They were already waiting for him, smiling, just like he remembered. Sheets of paper with arcane symbols and numbers lay in front of them next to glasses of drink and small, polyhedral shapes that glowed in brilliant colors that no human eye could have seen. Faces long since missed. Friends and loved ones that he'd wished he could have seen one more time, and now he could.

There was one empty seat waiting for him at the head of the table.

He took his seat and cleared his throat. Reaching out a hand, he adjusted the shimmering cardboard screen and glanced over his notes.

"All right, guys. Roll for initiative," he said.

[link]

Gary Gygax, creator of the pen and paper roleplaying game Dungeons and Dragons, and the grandfather of all tabletop roleplaying games, passed away today. He had been in poor health, suffering multiple strokes, heart attacks, and an aoric aneurysm.

If you have ever handled polyhedral dice, rolled for initiative, or even played a game of World of Warcraft online, you owe a great debt to the man who started it all with a bunch of fantasy supplement rules for a tabletop medieval combat game called Chainmail. Raise a glass at midnight tonight Eastern Standard Time for the man who made THAC0 a part of a teenage geek's vernacular, who authored countless blue-black-and-white maps made of five-foot squares and filled with ridiculous deathtraps, to the man who gave three generations of teenage nerds something to do on Saturday nights while all the "cool kids" were out hanging out with girls.

RIP, Dungeon Master

]]> *MoCaW http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/16913172/ http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/16913172/ Sat, 16 Feb 2008 11:28:44 PST
If you remember the hoary old days of the Playstation 1, you might remember a quirky little game called Vib Ribbon. One of the first rhythm games, Vib Ribbon had a neat little feature where you could pop in any music CD, and the game would build a custom track for you based on the song's rhythm and flow.

Audiosurf is its spiritual successor.

Gameplay is relatively simple, but contains layers of complexity. The idea is that you are a little spaceship traveling down a long winding road with three lanes. Along each lane are placed colored blocks. Run into a block, and you'll lay it out on a grid. Match three blocks of the same color, and you score points. Cooler colors, like blue and purple, show up in the more mellow parts of the song and are worth less points than hotter colors like red and yellow, which show up in the more exciting parts of the song.

The really awesome thing is that, like Vib Ribbon, you can load up any music file, and it'll create a custom track for you. This solves a major problem in the rhythm music genre: sometimes, they don't pick songs you like. Even custom music games like Frets on Fire or Stepmania have the problem that you can't just load up any song you like: someone has to go through the song and program in the puzzle part of the game.

Audiosurf cuts all that out.

All you do is load up the game, select "play" and surf through your hard drive. Find a song you want to play. Wait a few minutes while the game analyzes the song and creates a custom track. Then go. Once you've played a song once, the game will save the track data, so that replaying it takes a lot less loading time. And there you go.

Seriously, for ten bucks, this is one of the greatest video game deals ever. Practically unlimited tracks, compelling puzzle gameplay, and online leaderboards, where you can compare how well you did on "Learn to Fly" with the guy in the next state over.

[link] Official Website
[link] Wikipedia Page

]]> *MoCaW http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/16835791/ http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/16835791/ Mon, 11 Feb 2008 16:11:24 PST
Series is about this guy named Oji. Middle-aged middle-management guy with a young son, a dull marriage, and a dull life. Typical Japanese salaryman.

Sort of.

You see, before Oji became a dull, boring person with no life, he was a rock god. . . or a demigod, at least. Ten years ago, he was lead guitarist in a metal band called Black Heaven (whose apparent big hit was a cover of John Sykes' "Cautionary Warning.") He was on the verge of stardom.

Then the band fell apart. He knocked up a groupie, got married, and settled down and had a kid. Now he lives his dull life dreaming of the life he could have had. Sitting in an old guitar shop and talking with the owner and reminiscing about old times.

Then this hot secretary who got hired to work for his company tells him, "I love your sound." And she offers to take him to heaven if he'll play his guitar for her.

Of course, this is anime, so it's not Oji's hot man-beef she's going after, but the harmonics of his guitar-playing, which is needed to power the ultimate weapon that the aliens need to fight the enemy invaders.

It's still a fun show, though.

]]> *MoCaW http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/16747272/ http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/16747272/ Tue, 05 Feb 2008 23:09:41 PST
GOOD movie.

]]> *MoCaW http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/16551146/ http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/16551146/ Thu, 24 Jan 2008 12:48:23 PST
New link to the story:

[link]

Seems like the driver was being a douchebag, but ya know, all they had to do was take the leash off and put it back on once they got where they were going.

]]> *MoCaW http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/16525020/ http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/16525020/ Tue, 22 Jan 2008 16:50:50 PST [link]



]]> *MoCaW http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/16205068/ http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/16205068/ Tue, 01 Jan 2008 11:15:39 PST
1 Chambord and Obelisk

1 mojito

1 microphone for Rock Band on XBox 360 (sorry, Chad, I'll pay for a new one).

1 Whisky Sour

1 Obelisk Martini

Toasted in the New Year with a shot of Gran Patron Platinum Tequila (James, you are a beautiful beautiful man and you treat your friends like kings.)

2 Jack Daniels Single Barrel Whisky shots with Marc, between games of Rock Band in which my drumming and bassist skills slowly deteriorated from "Beginner Level" to "Drunken Beginner Level."

One crashed-out sleep with no shoes and no socks on.

Hangover Cure: Bloody Mary Mix with black pepper.

Also, somewhere along the line, me and wound up drunkenly scrawling p0n0ses and vag000s on my sketchpad.

Happy Motherlovin' New Year!!

]]> *MoCaW http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/16049890/ http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/16049890/ Sat, 22 Dec 2007 20:52:25 PST sent me a bag of randomness from Japan for Christmas, with a happy hamburger notepad, a packet of origami paper, and a card with cute kimono-wearing people on it, all wrapped up in a brown paper envelope with Kitfox on the cover. This makes me a happy muse.

XD XD XD XD XD

]]> *MoCaW http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/15876167/ http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/15876167/ Mon, 10 Dec 2007 11:58:30 PST OS on the X-Box and love the idea of Fallout:Tactics). There you go.

Everything I'm hearing about Bethesda's work on Fallout 3 fills me more with anticipation than with dread, which confuses me why Fallout fans seem to be so up in arms about it. Some of the major objections I've heard:

1. It's not Fallout if Bethesda makes it.

2. Real Time Combat isn't Fallout.

3. First Person Perspective isn't Fallout.

4. The VATS system (you can pause the game and target your shots from a FPS perspective) isn't Fallout.

5. Van Buren is Fallout.

6. It isn't Fallout if there are unkillable NPCs/unkillable children.

And all this just makes my head hurt.

Fallout isn't about a third-person isometric perspective. It's not about your character running in zig-zag lines because the hex-based engine couldn't draw straight lines in certain directions. It's not even about turn-based combat or the SPECIAL system.

Fallout is about three things.

First, it's about atmosphere. FEV, bottle caps as currency, giant mutant lizards, a lone traveler marching across the wasteland with a shotgun over one hand, accompanied only by a savage, half-feral dog as his only boon companion. It's about a gritty, dark, post-apocalyptic future where tainted water and radiation are just as likely to kill you as the band of bandits over the next ridge. It's about slaver guilds selling human beings for servitude and about crime lords battling it out over the ruins of a destroyed city.

Secondly, it's about choice. You enter a town, and you are faced with a dilemma: on the one hand, they have the water chip that your people need to survive. On the other, they also need the chip for their people to live. You have a choice to make: do you pull the chip and doom their people to slow death by thirst to save your family? Or do you find another, harder way?

Thirdly, it's about persistence. Your choices have consequences. Fail to recover the water chip in time, and your people die. Hire merchants to bring water to your home town, and the secrecy that protected it is breached, allowing raiders and mutants to find it easier. The ending of the game emphasizes this point: everywhere you go, your choices affect the fates of everyone around you. You can turn a village into a thriving metropolis that works to rebuild in this shattered earth, or you can wreak mayhem in your wake.

The only design decision I'm seeing that in any way worries me is the unkillable NPCs thing, and even that not so much. The original Fallout had an unkillable NPC as well: the Vault Overseer was invincible, if you recall, up until the very end of the game. I wouldn't mind if they made them very hard to kill, though: I have bad memories of Goris suddenly flipping out and deciding that little Susie had to die for no goddamn reason and getting me branded as a Childkiller as a result. . . I like the idea that someone proposed that killing that NPC makes the quest unsolveable: you get a warning window saying "You just failed the quest: you can either go on and see it to the bitter end, or you can reload."

I do understand Bethesda's concerns about child-killing, though. Video games are under much tighter scrutiny than when Fallout 1 and 2 came out: some of the content in those games would cause a hue and outcry today (Prostitution! Murder! Cannibalism! Genocide!) and, video games being the competitive market it is, Bethesda needs to keep an eye on Jack Thompson and his ilk to avoid unnecessary lawsuits. I do feel, however, that the choice should be there: more than preventing evil actions, games should allow gamers to make the choice, but with severe consequences. You pays your money and you makes your choice. You can offset this by including a time limit to discourage grinding for levels (Like Fallout 1) and giving greater experience and in-game bonuses for doing things the ethical way.

Conclusion: This Fallout fan, for one, is looking forward to Fallout 3 and plans to judge it on its own merits, not by how similar or different it is to Fallout 1 and 2.

P.S. I played the Van Buren tech demo. It sucked. And the story, from what I've gathered of it, also sucked. So there.

]]> *MoCaW http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/15791805/ http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/15791805/ Tue, 04 Dec 2007 10:52:47 PST and revised because she's a meddler who actually wants me to list things people can give me.

Step 1.

Make a post in your dA journal. The post should contain your list of 10 holiday wishes. The wishes can be anything at all, from simple and fandom-related ("I'd love a Snape/Hermione icon that's just for me") to medium ("I wish for _____ on DVD") to really big ("All I want for Christmas is a new car/computer/house/TV.") The important thing is, make sure these wishes are things you really, truly want.

If you wish for real-life things (not fics or icons), make sure you include some sort of contact info in your post, whether it's your address or just your email address where Santa (or one of his elves) could get in touch with you.

Step 2.

Surf around your friends list (or friends friends, or just random journals) to see who has posted their list. And now here's the important part:

If you see a wish you can grant, and it's in your heart to do so, make someone's wish come true. Sometimes someone's trash is another's treasure, and if you have a leather jacket you don't want or a gift certificate you won't use--or even know where you could get someone's dream purebred Basset Hound for free--do it.

You needn't spend money on these wishes unless you want to. The point isn't to put people out, it's to provide everyone a chance to be someone else's holiday elf--to spread the joy. Gifts can be made anonymously or not--it's your call.

There are no rules with this project, no guarantees, and no strings attached. Just...wish, and it might come true. Give, and you might receive. And you'll have the joy of knowing you made someone's holiday special.

Step 3.

My List

1. I wish to finish my NanoWrimo Project. Due to issues with November, some of which were my fault and others of which were not, I stalled out at about the 15,000 word mark. I want to finish this up, go the distance, finish the marathon, even if everyone else has already gone home hours before. Heck, I wish to finish any one of the many other projects I've started and never finished, including that roleplaying campaign that ended on a cliffhanger so many years ago.

2. Heck, may as well: I wish for a gift's certificate to Fry's so I can build a new computer. Or for someone to help me make my current box work better. Either way.

3. I wish for someone to brighten the day of a sick kid: [link] Do it, do it naow.

4. I wish that I could spend a Christmas with everyone I love. This is a wish that'll probably never happen, given that in the pool of people that includes "Everyone I love," there are people whose internal relationship within that pool is "Hates Each Other's Guts," or "Can't Be In the Same Room Together," and another subset of that group is "People who are not here any more." Oh well, one can wish. I'll settle for Christmas greetings from people whom I've not seen in a long while

5. I wish for free art, because everyone loves free art. :3

6. I wish for a signed autographed copy of a Terry Pratchett Novel never mind, I already got this one. :3

7. I wish for the greatest sandwich on Earth, a sandwich of such delicious tastiness that all other sandwiches will be mere shadows of its glory and might, and even though all other sandwiches will turn as ashes in my mouth because of the delicousness of this sandwich, it will be fine because even the memory of that sandwich will be enough to turn the roughest PB&J into a delicious feast. (In other words, I wanna go out to Philippes with a bunch of friends and get some french dips. )

8. I wish that all my friends will get all of their own holiday wishes too. But that's lame and sentimental, so yeah, I'll be selfish and ask for a comic book instead. Preferably mmmmm. . . Empowered, Demon Mages, or. . . mmmmmmmmmm. . . *rummages* I dunno. Manga. Or a gift certificate to Borders so I can buy my own damn manga instead.

9. I wish for a true sequel to X-Com: UFO DEFENSE. None of this UFO:Afterlight BS. I mean a real sequel to X-Com. Hell, even just a remake with new 3D graphis and all the major glitches polished out and some gameplay enhancements. That game made my teenage years, and I'd... ]]> *MoCaW http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/15727712/ http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/15727712/ Thu, 29 Nov 2007 21:07:54 PST
[link]

It means that I have decided to write a full-length novel (no edits, just output) over the month of November.

Bug me about this so I don't cop out.

Tagged by

Interview the Character!

To put it simply, ask the character a question that you would like to know about her and the character would answer it to the best of her ability.

Not sure what character to use. I think I'll go for Kit Fox given that she's the one I've done the most work around Unless people decide to suggest something else. So suggest away.

]]> *MoCaW http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/15527411/ http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/15527411/ Thu, 15 Nov 2007 22:39:05 PST
[link]

It means that I have decided to write a full-length novel (no edits, just output) over the month of November.

Bug me about this so I don't cop out.

At least I broke the 10,000 mark. I'm not sure whether I'll make it on time, but I intend to at least get to 25,000 before I have to stop.

Honestly, I'm pretty glad I've even gotten this far, given how I started out.

We'll see how it goes from here.

]]> *MoCaW http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/15414135/ http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/15414135/ Wed, 07 Nov 2007 23:17:10 PST
[link]

It means that I have decided to write a full-length novel (no edits, just output) over the month of November.

Bug me about this so I don't cop out.

So somehow at the last moment, my story about dragon musketeers became "Sexy Zombie Wendigo Gunslingers from Hell." I'm not kidding.

It'll stay like that unless my grandmother decides that she'll take me up on my offer.

]]> *MoCaW http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/15298296/ http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/15298296/ Wed, 31 Oct 2007 07:53:08 PDT
EDIT: Clarification: I've wanted to do a project writing about my family's experiences during the Korean War and such for a while now, and I recently found out that my step-grandmother's not doing so good. I may change my NanoWrimo project to that instead, given that I'm realizing I might not have that much time left to do it.

]]> *MoCaW http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/15273682/ http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/15273682/ Mon, 29 Oct 2007 14:24:22 PDT
California Mortuary in Downey [link] provided the services. Now I don't usually call people out, but I just have to say a few words on their services.

1. If you plan to have a video presentation, it might be good if the video screen is visible from the side alcove where the family of the deceased sits. So would making sure that your sound system is working.

2. The pallbearers view their duty to the deceased as a last respectful sacred duty. They would like to know what they have to do beforehand, and would like the chance to carry out their duty with some dignity. Standing behind them and yelling instructions in a rather loud voice is neither respectful nor dignified.

3. Asking the father of the deceased to tip the CHP officer who provided a police escort is incredibly rude.

4. So is telling people during the viewing to "please move quickly, and if you've already viewed the body, please go outside."

5. Next time, try phrasing it, "At this time, I'd like to ask the family of the deceased to come forward and add a spade of earth to the grave. If you are not immediate family, please feel free to stay and observe in respectful silence. You may meet us at the reception afterwards." Saying, "Only the family come to the tent, everyone else, we'll see you at the reception" isn't the most tactful way to address a class of grieving teenagers. When a small group of fifteen year old girls is standing there confused and crying and wondering if they're not allowed to stay, you didn't do your job right.

6. If you plan to lay cut roses on the casket, please have them prepared beforehand. Pulling bouquets off the casket arrangement at the grave site doesn't exactly exude an air of professionalism.

Other observations:

1. When your granddaughter is being buried, it's a good idea to put your damn cell phone on vibrate so that your loud musical ringtone doesn't blare out in the middle of the eulogy.

2. I understand that after the viewing, you may want to hold a brief private prayer for immediate family of the deceased, but it might have been good to turn around and see the two very non-Korean friends of the deceased who were the last two mourners coming up to pay their respects before the casket is closed. If I hadn't noticed them standing forlornly outside the circle of the family and told them to move on, they might never have had the chance to view her a last time before the casket was closed up.

So basically I spent the funeral moving between manic giggling, teeth-gritting rage, and heartbreaking sadness from moment to moment. Not the best funeral I've ever been to.

So I've been thinking about what I want done when I die, and I've made some decisions: those of you who know me in real life, please keep these things in mind:

No sentimentalism attached to my body. If I'm gone, I'm gone, and all that's left is dust and ashes. Cut me to pieces, let anyone who can make use of the pieces do so. Donate as many organs as you can. Donate as many tissues as you can. As long as it's not for profit, let them do as they wish: research, grafting, transplants, whatever. Burn up the rest and scatter the ashes somewhere nice. Like Yosemite. Or Mount Baldy.

Forget about crying fests. Hold a cocktail party or something. With a brass band. Let them play "When the Saints Go Marching In." Hold a wake or whatever they call it. Put my urn there and let people drink toasts in my honor or something. You can have a worship memorial service too, but don't make it all somber and sad and grim. Let there be some joy in it too.

Anyone trying to use my death to get people to go back to church or promote a church or constantly harping on the fact that I accepted Christ will get kicked in the gnads. Hard. Let God be my judge. You don't worry about that. You worry about yourself first.

Hold the damn services in English. None of this bilingual shit. I speak English. Most everyone else who I care about speaks English. If you want to have some Korean, that's fine, but if the program has Korean first and English after, I'm gonna come down and lay some serious haunting on the doofus who made up the worship bulletin.

]]> *MoCaW http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/15188472/ http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/15188472/ Tue, 23 Oct 2007 13:49:50 PDT
It helped to hear it from someone else.

I have to admit I feel pretty shitty about this whole deal. First, because it was so pointless. All the easy answers don't work. Calling it God's will doesn't work, because what kind of God would want this? Blaming Anna for what she did doesn't work either: I don't know how and why she did what she did, and I never will, but I feel that this isn't what she wanted. I can't even take comfort from the fact that her organs might save other lives: what organs could be donated weren't suitable for transplanting. So now we're just waiting for the coroner's report to find out what exactly happened, and we're not sure even that will help: the doctor warned us that it's very possible the coroner will never be able to find out why Anna died.

So in the end, what was the point? No point. Just a tragic event that leaves no winners. Nothing good, all bad. The best we can salvage from this is a growing understanding that life is precious, and that we, as a family, need to come together, to never let ourselves drift apart like this again, so that we don't ever go through the experience of not seeing each other in months or years only to have the next reunion be at the bedside of one of our own hooked up to tubes and wires.

And if you ask me, that's not worth the price.

So, here it is. I'm feeling kinda shitty about this whole deal. I'm feeling guilty that I wasn't closer to her when she was alive. I really wish that things had gone differently, that I'd been the big cousin to her so that I could have done something to get that silly girl through this case of teenage stupidity that turned out terminal. And that's okay. CS Lewis once said that guilt is like a cup of hot tea: if you dip a finger in it, you'll just end up scalded and hurt. But if you drink it down, you'll find it warms and invigorates you, even if it's bitter going down. I can't know if anything I could have done would have helped, but I do accept the blame for not even trying, for not even knowing.

Emo rant over. We now return you to your regularly scheduled program.

]]> *MoCaW http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/15172416/ http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/15172416/ Mon, 22 Oct 2007 12:01:41 PDT
[link]

It means that I have decided to write a full-length novel (no edits, just output) over the month of November.

Bug me about this so I don't cop out.

Back in the saddle. . .

Thinking about where the story can go. Diurasc had an interesting suggestion for me to consider: a 2x2 matrix of sorts. Darkness on one side, Light on the other. Male across the top, Female across the bottom.

So the other major players in the story take form.

1. Light Feminine: The Dragon Knight Trio. I've already covered them, and I'll flesh them out later.

2. Light Masculine: The crown prince. Unlike his father, the late king, he is a beloved figure who wishes only the best for his people. However, he is still young, and naive, and at the mercy of selfish interests. With the help of the D-Knights, he may yet prevail to see the idealistic reforms he wants put into place. He is opposed by. . .

3. Dark Feminine: The late king's second wife, and mother to his second son. If she can eliminate the crown prince, her son will become the next king. Her marriage to the late king was a political marriage of convenience, and she does not hide the scorn she feels for her new country. Her plot is aided by. . .

4. Dark Masculine: A powerful nobleman of a neighboring country. Unlike Homelandia, Neighboria does not have a tradition of dragon knights, which has given them a weakness in terms of air combat. That is all about to change, as a slightly nutty scholar has designed a device made of cloth and wood that allows men to fly. They are more fragile than dragons, but they can be built in larger numbers.

And so the basic plot forms itself: Several years ago, the old king died, and a viceroy (possibly the head of the D-Knights?) was appointed to watch over the kingdom in the Crown Prince's place. Now, as the prince approaches the age of majority and the day of his coronation, various factions plot to cement their control over the throne. One of those factions is led by the prince's own aunt, who seeks to usurp him and put her own young son in his place. In the midst of all this intrigue and chaos, a young girl named "D" becomes the caretaker of a dragon egg and travels to the capital city to join the Dragon Knights.

Set Pieces:

1. The hatching.

2. Her first encounter with the Three.

3. Her first encounter with the Prince.

4. Intrigue and dark plots are afoot.

5. A little courtly romance, and perhaps some humor as well.

6. An aerial battle between a corps of dragonriders and a fleet of daVinci-punk airships and ornithopters.

Things get better and better.

One idea: perhaps "D", unlike d'Artagnan, is not nobility after all. Perhaps she is a commoner: a merchant or a shop girl, maybe, since I detest the farm girl archetype. That could lead to some fish out of water scenarios: a commoner, unused to courtly behavior, causing problems with her lack of manners and her misunderstandings of the niceties of noble society.

In that case, the role of the Three becomes more clear: we basically have a kind of a cross-section of the Estates.

1. "Aramis" is the church.
2. "Athos" is the nobility.
3. "Porthos" is the rich bourgeoisie.

And "D" is the outsider to high society.

Next thing to consider: for a story about dragons, there has been remarkably little discussion of dragons in all this prewriting. Perhaps I should think about them next.

****
I owe a lot of people a lot of shit. . . *sighs*

Muse

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

Avatar: Chibi Catboi Me

[link] is my journal for keeping track of interesting adages, thoughts, quotes, and ruminations.

I am worth $2,498,020 on HumanForSale.com

^^^^^^^^^^
- the club for people who like catgirls.

^^^^^^^^^^

Horribly late artwork I've promised to do for people:

- Wedding Gift Part 2
- "Winged Elementals"... ]]> *MoCaW http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/15137014/ http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/15137014/ Sat, 20 Oct 2007 00:11:07 PDT
Thank you for your prayers, and for the outpouring of support. We could still use them. My aunt and Anna's sister Stephanie are going through a really tough time now, as you can imagine.

]]> *MoCaW http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/15123184/ http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/15123184/ Fri, 19 Oct 2007 00:14:30 PDT
Thanks

Muse

UPDATE 10-19-07 4:49 PM PST.

I'm on my way back to the hospital, and will probably stay there for a while. I'll give another update when I get home.

]]> *MoCaW http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/15114133/ http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/15114133/ Thu, 18 Oct 2007 11:10:57 PDT
[link]

It means that I have decided to write a full-length novel (no edits, just output) over the month of November.

Bug me about this so I don't cop out.

One of my sins is that I can hear the most terrible tragic stories, and while part of me thinks, "God, that's terrible," another part of me can think, "My God, I could really use that in a story." So if my brainstorming sounds familiar to anyone, my apologies. It's not meant to offend at all.

First, thanks for the feedback and considerations. My responses.

1. Girl and her dragon: great idea. Will run with it.

2. Draconic bildungsroman: great idea as well. No reason why the dragon can't grow up too.

3. Avoid the stereotypical boy-becomes-man story. No problem.

Thoughts and considerations. . .

Making the main character a girl and not a boy changes the dynamic slightly. When it comes to girls with dragons, the stereotypical relationship is that of the damsel in distress and the marauding beast who serves as a means of making the muscular and armor-clad hero look manly and tough. As tempting as it is to turn that relationship on its head, Patricia Wrede already did it in an entertaining and hilarious fashion in Dealing with Dragons so I think I'll pass.

It was also kind of tempting to set it in the French Revolution: the image of a girl on dragonback storming the Bastille is too great for words. Flintlock muskets vs. Dragonfire! An evil dragon-borne aristocracy defeated by a street rebellion aided by a girl and her fire-breathing beast! Soldiers in blue uniforms with big hats standing in line with raised muskets, firing in volleys against a fire-breathing beast!

Just one problem: Naomi Novik did it much better in her Temeraire novels. Which is, honestly, what inspired me to write about dragons in the first place. The thing is, there's inspiration and then there's full-out stealing, so I think I'll demur for now.

But thinking about the French reminded me of one of my favorite authors EVER: Alexandre Dumas. I loved the Three Musketeers. I devoured whole the Count of Monte Cristo. Even the Man in the Iron Mask, and Twenty Years Later, which didn't appeal as much, were decent books. But my favorite: still the Three Musketeers.

Hmmm. . .

. . . what if D'Artagnan were a girl instead?

And what if, instead of Musketeers, there were dragon knights?

Consider this possibility: a rather hotheaded young noble-lady somehow winds up bound to a dragonet, in a bit of shameless cribbing from Anne McCaffrey. Despite the fact that her father would rather die than see her engage in such an ignoble pursuit, she is sent off to the capital to train with the Dragon Knights a (possibly) all-female corps of elite cavalry mounted on dragons. In the process, she encounters a trio of senior knights who take her under their wings and train her into one of them. In the process, she faces palace intrigue, duels of honor, and the machinations of her father, who is trying to secretly sabotage her career and bring her home safe and sound.

Now things start falling into place.

So here is what I've got so far (subject to change):

Setting: Pseudo-17th century France-like country. A monarchy in slow decline into decadence. With a weak king in power, a behind-the-scenes power struggle breaks out between three factions; the Church, the Alchemist's Guild, and the Nobility. Caught between the three are a group of dragon-mounted cavalry known as the Dragon Knights. Because all dragons are, by royal decree, the property of the crown, the D-Knights report directly to the King, and have thus-far remained neutral. All three factions are trying to sway the D-Knights to their side, or, failing that, force them to remain neutral. The conflict has slowly escalated, and it looks like civil war may be imminent.

The Dragon Knights: an elite group of dragon-mounted cavalry who serve as the core of any military. Because dragons tend to mind-bond to humans of the opposite sex, the majority of combat D-Knights are female (male Dragon Knights spend a lot of time tending to gravid or brooding queens, and because dragons are so rare and take so long to mature, queens are almost always gravid or brooding). Because of this, Dragon Knights are viewed with a certain disdain, despite their usefulness in battle: it's not ladylike to gallavant around a battlefield scorching the enemy, and male D-Knights get mocked as glorified nursemaids and midwives by their more martial peers.

Our heroine: The youngest daughter of a rather minor noble family, somehow winds up linked to a dragon and decides to go off to adventure. Ha... ]]> *MoCaW http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/15100425/ http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/15100425/ Wed, 17 Oct 2007 11:32:40 PDT
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It means that I have decided to write a full-length novel (no edits, just output) over the month of November.

Bug me about this so I don't cop out.

I usually don't do prewriting, but I'm considering doing some for my NanoWriMo project, just because when it starts, I'll be really busy just writing, so in the meantime, I may as well prepare for the grind.

I'm currently leaning towards the dragon project for two reasons: 1. Because people seem to like it, and 2. Because I'm currently reading the Temeraire novels by Naomi Novik, and I've got dragons on my mind. The one I really should do is Haniwa, but the problem with that one is that it's not concrete: it keeps fluctuating and changing, it's too darn epic, and attacking that story is, to be honest, kinda intimidating. So I'll go with something simpler for now.

The first and most important thing is the main character: I like to build my worlds around my main characters, not vice versa. Now the obvious choice is the restless farm boy who gets thrown into a mysterious world-spanning plot and sets out from his bucolic pastoral existence to save the world, but that's not gonna work for me. Most importantly, it's been done to death by everyone from Eragon to Lord of the Rings to Star Wars. As for another thing, I know jack shit about farming, so I wouldn't be able to make it feel right.

Well, what do I know? I know about working in offices and such. Hmmmm. . . perhaps a clerk, then? Our hero could be an apprentice clerk working in a counting=house who one day comes across a mysterious. . .

. . . wait a minute. . .

Mary Sue Mary Sue. . . Self Insert. . . let me look it up. . . a ha. Yup, just like I thought. Treading into dangerous territory here.

Let's take a step back and think about what I really want from a main character.

First, what don't I want? Well, I certainly don't want Eragon or Harry Potter. The poor, put-upon orphan who shows his tormentors what for. . . that archetype honestly makes me kinda sick, especially given the amount of emoness that generally gets put upon them. No one's really done that archetype well since Charles Dickens and Mark Twain. . .

. . . Mark Twain.

Huckleberry Finn.

Hmmmmmmmmm. . .

Consider this possibility: a put-upon boy flees a lousy home situation on the back of a dragon: how he meets the dragon, I'll fill in later. In any case, the story would take the same form as Huck Finn: a journey through a country . The dragon could be raft and Jim both: a means of transportation and a different point of view on the world. And instead of an orphan kid who gets magical powers and saves the world, we'd just have a rather prosaic, down to earth story about a boy setting out from his home on a grand adventure: nothing earth-shattering, because the focus would be more on his growing up.

Is this the story I'll go with? Probably not. I'm finicky, and most likely by the time I start writing, I'll be going with something totally different. I'm silly that way, as my journal footer will show. . .

*****

It's also come to my attention that I owe a lot of people a lot of shit. . . *sighs*

Muse

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

Avatar: Chibi Catboi Me

[link] is my journal for keeping track of interesting adages, thoughts, quotes, and ruminations.

I am worth $2,498,020 on HumanForSale.com

^^^^^^^^^^
- the club for people who like catgirls.

^^^^^^^^^^

Horribly late artwork I've promised to do for people:

- Wedding Gift Part 2
- "Winged Elementals" Kiriban.

I will do these, I swear! Really.

^^^^^^^^^^ ]]> *MoCaW http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/15031524/ http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/15031524/ Fri, 12 Oct 2007 15:44:09 PDT
[link]

It means that I have decided to write a full-length novel (no edits, just output) over the month of November.

Bug me about this so I don't cop out.

Yup.

Ideas on what I could write.

1. A book about a boy and his dragon that doesn't suck. (I'm looking at YOU, Eragon. . .)

2. The story of many names and ideas that currently goes by the name "Haniwa."

3. Always a Bitch: The Novel

4. The Color of the Wheat Fields: The Novel

5. Type the words "I am a fish" ten thousand times and pass out.

It's also come to my attention that I owe a lot of people a lot of shit. . . *sighs*

Muse

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

Avatar: Chibi Catboi Me

[link] is my journal for keeping track of interesting adages, thoughts, quotes, and ruminations.

I am worth $2,498,020 on HumanForSale.com

^^^^^^^^^^
- the club for people who like catgirls.

^^^^^^^^^^

Horribly late artwork I've promised to do for people:

- Wedding Gift Part 2
- "Winged Elementals" Kiriban.

I will do these, I swear! Really.

^^^^^^^^^^ ]]> *MoCaW http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/14806728/ http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/14806728/ Wed, 26 Sep 2007 21:18:02 PDT
It's also come to my attention that I owe a lot of people a lot of shit. . . *sighs*

Muse

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

Avatar: Chibi Catboi Me

[link] is my journal for keeping track of interesting adages, thoughts, quotes, and ruminations.

I am worth $2,498,020 on HumanForSale.com

^^^^^^^^^^
- the club for people who like catgirls.

^^^^^^^^^^

Horribly late artwork I've promised to do for people:

- Wedding Gift Part 2
- "Winged Elementals" Kiriban.

I will do these, I swear! Really.

^^^^^^^^^^ ]]> *MoCaW http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/14787670/ http://MoCaW.deviantart.com/journal/14787670/ Tue, 25 Sep 2007 14:36:30 PDT
Let me tell you a little story about a girl named Cassie Bernall. Cassie Bernall was a nice girl. White middle class, Christian, people apparently liked her a lot. Then one day, two guys walked into her high school carrying guns and killed a lot of people. Cassie was one of them. She got shot in the head and died in the library at Columbine High School.

This is when things get complicated.

You see, after she died, one of her classmates claimed that he heard her and the gunman having a short conversation. The story's been around, but the popular version goes like this:

Him: "Do you believe in God?"

Her: "Yes."

Him: "Why?"

Her: "Because my parents taught me to."

Him: "There is no God."

And then she dies.

Nice story, huh? A lot of people seemed to think so. Crazy psycho teenager faces down a nice Christian girl, taunts her, and she dies for her faith and goes into the arms of Jesus. Books have been written about her, praising her. Teenagers have been told to idolize her. One minister I heard claimed that her story is the most important moment from that tragedy: the triumph of faith over death.

I call it bullshit.

First, it didn't happen that way. The classic story where Cassie Bernall speaks her faith and dies for it. . . only one student claimed it was what happened, and he only overheard it. He never saw it happen.

The official version of events goes like this: When Klebold and Harris opened fire, there were many injured students. As they went around "finishing" what they had come to do, they came across an injured student named Valerie Schnurr, shot three times. One of them leaned down and asked her if she believed in God, and she said "Yes. . . no. . . I don't know. My parents taught me to believe in God." He then taunted her and moved on. She survived.

Cassie Bernall's actual last words were, apparently, "Oh God, oh God, why is this happening?" She was praying, and then she died.

But that's not as good a story, is it?

The people who spread the first version of the story make Cassie Bernall into a saint. They tell Christian teenagers that it is right and proper to go to your death like sheep. They want the fiction of Cassie Bernall the Christ facing down the devil and both dying and winning at the same time.

The truth is far more prosaic.

The truth is that in that library, there were few Saint Stephens. But there was a Saint Peter. There was a girl who, faced with death, realized that she could deny her God in the face of fear. I have no doubt that she wept afterwards. I have nothing but sympathy for her. We are, after all, only human.

And that's why I hate the story of Cassie Bernall, the Girl Who Said Yes.

First, it's wrong. It didn't happen that way, and faith based on lies in so faith at all.

Second, it does an incredible disservice to Miss Valerie Schnurr. Was her experience somehow lessened by the fact that she didn't become a martyr? She did not die for her faith, but she certainly bled for it, and holding her up to a fictional standard that she could not achieve is cruelty itself.

But most of all, I am disgusted by what it implies about faith.

In the classic exchange, Cassie Bernall's reason for her faith given is that her parents taught her to love Jesus. That's it. It was in fact, used as an illustration in a sermon as to the importance of teaching children about Christ. "Teach them to love Jesus so they can die in a school shooting." I know the pastor didn't mean it that way, but that's how it came out in my mind.

And that's just disgusting to me.

"Because my parents taught me so," is not grounds for martyrdom. That is not something to die for. "Because Jesus loves me." "Because I know he lives." "Because when I was sixteen, I felt His presence and I accepted him as my personal savior and I love him." Anything but "Because I was told to!" Even "JUST BECAUSE" would have worked for me, because it would imply that it was something the fictional Cassie Bernall chose for herself, as opposed to something fed to her by her parents and those in authority.

The truth is, Cassie Bernall was not a martyr for her faith. Neither was Valerie Schnurr. They were just two scared kids hiding from madmen who'd come to kill them, and they turned to God in their own ways for comfort. The one who had to answer for her faith lived. The one who didn't died. And that is the whole truth. Nothing more, nothing less.

Mourn their loss, grieve for them, but do not beatify them, for when you do, you do true injustice to their memories. It is not better to accept th... ]]> *MoCaW