http://search.deviantart.com/?q=by:Nethray-of-Velec&section=today deviantART RSS for by:Nethray-of-Velec en-us Copyright 2009, deviantART.com Mon, 07 Dec 2009 19:56:58 PST deviantART.com http://blogs.law.harvard.edu/tech/rss http://s.deviantart.com/minish/widgets/apple-touch-icon-precomposed.png http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/21053608/ http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/21053608/ Sat, 18 Oct 2008 20:29:46 PDT I have my reasons...
I'm not going to give out the name of the new account, but those who can guess will find it with great ease...

]]> ~Nethray-of-Velec http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/17550509/ http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/17550509/ Fri, 28 Mar 2008 00:08:20 PDT F*ckin' high school! F*ckin' theater! F*ckin' Velec! F*ckin' sh*thead males with their f*ckin' hard-to-read emotions!
I've been feeling rather crappy. Velec has been going crappilly. Seriously, I haven't even finished chapter 5 and the deadline for chapter 6 is coming up... I'm way too far behind and i feel like the plot is going downhill. I've been thinking that perhaps I should start over. Maybe start posting little snippets over summer vacation, but mostly keep the progress to myself for now, you know? I don't think I can handle my schedule I've given myself at the moment - my play analysis for Mr. Harder due soon as well as the closing of the grading book this quarter coming up (My geometry grade is a B+! My parents are going to kill me for not getting an A! Don't even get me started on my P.E. grade... O.O) To top that off, I've gotten some parts of my social life rather turbulant - it's a f*cking mess! At least to me it is... Others could just say I'm making a mountain out of a molehill...
I think I'm going to take a serious break from dA for a while. Maybe just stick around as a lurker if I really feel like it.
But I won't be posting for a while. Neither blogs nor art.
I'm sorry for leaving...
'Till we meet again!
~Neth

]]> ~Nethray-of-Velec http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/17156213/ http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/17156213/ Sun, 02 Mar 2008 20:53:38 PST CHAPTER 5 IS GOING TO BE F*CKING LATE!
God damn it!
Okay, so it's partly because I was slacking off with one of my drama class assignments and, when my parents found out, they got all "ARGH!". So I couldn't get a lot of drawings done. To top that off, it's currently crunch time for that play I volunteered for (DAMN YOU! It's time for a freakin' advertisement. For any of you deviants out there who live in the San Francisco Bay Area - especially those in the East Bay - the show nights are March 7, 8, 13, 14, and 15. PLEASE COME! It would be greatly apprieciated! You'll see just why I couldn't keep up with Velec. It will be showing at Harding Elementary on Fairmount Street in El Cerrito. Doors open at 7:30 PM and the play begins at 8.) I need to be there every night now and they even had us there this weekend! So, yeah...
Also, I guess you could jsut say I was just plain slacking off... Sorry! Sorry! Distractions and whatnot, you know? Carving a guy's name into my shin and whatnot - teenager stuff...
Anyways, I don't have rehearsals this wednesday and thursday, so I'll try and work on chapter five and see what I can get done. Just expect it to be later than hoped for...

]]> ~Nethray-of-Velec http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/16808023/ http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/16808023/ Sat, 09 Feb 2008 21:52:51 PST him. Call me insane, but though I have two other guys pretty much swooning over me and another guy who seems to have his more idiotic friends try and get me to come back to him (whether or not it's him actually getting them to do this or if they are doing it on their own accord due to some sort of pity they feel I will probably never know...), I would much rather chase after my obsession. I would rather have him over everyone else. It's stupid. I feel that I would gladly die for a simple acknowledgement of my feelings for him. Instead, to him it hardly matters if I'm in the same room, staring after him or talking to an aquaintence about how I think I'd rather go lesbian than get into another relationship with a guy (I couldn't really tell if I said this to get the guy to quit pestering me to hook up with his friend again or if I was doing it to make my angel hurt inside) Honestly, I'm not too sure about anything, really... When I'm in the computer lab, I'm so confused and once I leave, the only certainty is that I'm not well.

I haven't been feeling well at all... All I can think about is him and how angry I am with the world. I want to kill myself. I feel like it's all pointless. Everything would be so much better now if I at least had the security of knowing I have (Though I guess you can't really call it security) a kitchen knife at the ready to end my wretched life. F*ck... I've even lost that while stabbing my matress in frustration! D:< I hate this all... Somebody just kill me now!

]]> ~Nethray-of-Velec http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/16604005/ http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/16604005/ Sun, 27 Jan 2008 20:39:55 PST Velec up earlier than planned (Feb. 12) I may have it up next weekend (Feb. 2&3) or the weekend after (Feb. 9&10), depending on how much I'm able to ink in during lunch and third block as well as after school. So, yey! I guess I'm compensating for the late update for chapter three... I guess...

]]> ~Nethray-of-Velec http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/16528428/ http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/16528428/ Tue, 22 Jan 2008 20:14:12 PST
So, let's state a few things that have actually happened between now and I forget when:

1. Finally single again! Kind of old, I know. Sorry... I never actually had the time to talk about this. So, I'm finally free of that darned relationship with my ex and now to move onto some other things. Oooh, really funny story though. So, we were playing truth or dare during our lunch break way, way after we broke up and this dude named Tyler dared me to kiss my ex on the cheek, but he's out of the room. Like ten minutes before the bell was about to ring, he comes back and I tell him that he's pretty much S.O.L. for being late, but I go through with the dare anyway... He f*cking drops to the floor and we all have a nice laugh. Maybe that part wasn't too, too funny. In fact, the only funny thing I find about that is that that was the first time I actually did anything to him other than give him a hug!

2. My Uncle's in a coma. He's been having serious health problems lately and, after a horrible night throwing up and whatnot, he gets into a coma and no one knows if he's going to make it out alive. Well, that pretty much sucks, right? I guess I'd have more on my feelings on this, but I'm not too, too close to that side of the family, anyway. I'm sad, sure. I mean, he is family. It's sad that it happened like this, yeah... I dunno... I'm none too sure how I'm really feeling about it... I feel really sorry for my cousins and aunt, too... Eh... Maybe the true emotion will hit later on.

3. Notes to my crush+unlucky! For the love of any deity willing to listen! Last time I gave Ian a note, our drama teacher died of unknown reasons. You know what? You know update number 2? Yeah, that happened the same day I gave him the note. F*CK! It's like it's bad luck, or something.

Anyway, I also wanted to add that this time I didn't deliver the note to him myself. I gave it to my friend Monica to give him during second block on friday (End of the semester. Hopefully, I won't have to deal with him after that day, but then again, is threatening that she'll do something rather horrible to Ian involving rape... Hm... Live out the rest of the yer in fearful shame? Let the boy I love get raped? God, I think I liked it better when my other option was prostitution! D: ) I still don't know if he read it. If he never did, I guess it's for the best... It's just another note with the petty emotions I try to convince everyone I feel so dearly, plus a bit of a suicidal undertone - a melodramatic piece of sh*t that should have never left the pen! Anyway, after taking a test, Monica and I got into a conversation at fourth block about the note. She said I should have just straight up talked to Ian about it - he would never talk to me about it. Whether or not he liked me back, he wouldn't say anything about it - at least that's what she said... She said he was a chicken - nothing but a big baby. It wasn't as bad as last time, though. Last time, she had called him these names to his face without an explination. It was actually rather funny, but never the less...

I told Monica that I was nothing but a chicken as well... I wanted to to say these things to Ian with my own mouth - with my own voice, but I didn't. I can't. I don't think I will... My words of nervous affection seem to only stay on paper, permanently mocking me with a voiceless tone. I would have said more more on it, but then Ian approached us as soon as I called myself a chicken. I shut up and left Monica and Ian to converse. Suddenly, there was a game of B.S. and, loving that game as much as I do, I decided to break away from my emotional shell and play with Monica, Ian, and a kid named PK (Yeah, the same one who stole my pen those months back...) It was rather fun... A great way to end the semester, in my mind. Class ended with people hanging out in their usual English class cliques - cards flopping about the desks and mind games being dealt... All that time, I said pretty much nothing to Ian. I joined in on saying how horrible he was at playing B.S. and very subtle phrases that could have been for anyone... I didn't really talk to him, but more like talked with him in ear shot. In all truth, I'm just hopeless...

4. Velec Updated! Yeah! I just posted chapter 3 a while ago, so yeah... Enjoy...

That's all, I guess...

]]> ~Nethray-of-Velec http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/16388517/ http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/16388517/ Sun, 13 Jan 2008 13:31:24 PST Velec will be updated later than hoped for. I'm sorry. My scanner's just acting like a horrible, horrible mess right now. It refuses to scan anything and I'm none too sure why. My apologies for the inconvience.

Come to think of it, I COULD just take a picture of each page via my webcam... Hm... Suggestions, anyone?

]]> ~Nethray-of-Velec http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/16189866/ http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/16189866/ Mon, 31 Dec 2007 17:18:20 PST Of course not. You're busy with your studies right now.
Remember how we'd play pretend and you'd all laugh at me for being too much into the game?
God. Of course not! You're too busy dancing with your significant other, just waiting to get home to do more than dancing, I'm certain.
Remember when I got hit with that dodgeball and dared not cry?
Of course not. It was the only thing that didn't make me cry.
Remember when we were younger and we'd make Sanrio characters out of play-dough while you called your sister "Atte" and I called mine, well, "Nikki"?
Of course not. You're busy being just like your sister.
Remember when I called you my cousin?
Well, I guess you do. Never the less, blood is thicker than water and you aren't blood.
Remember when we were younger and we'd play hide-and-seek under the bleachers at our sisters' High school?
Of course not. You're too busy sitting on them and not playing under them.
Remember when we were younger and you'd always go to Reno?
Well, it hardly matters, you're a million miles away in a land I've always wanted to go to.
Remember when we went to math club together and, no matter what, you'd still get stuck.
Of course not. You're probably still stumbling over those problems, am I right?
Remember when I loved him and you loved Chris?
I hear Chris is with Nan, now.
Remember me, the only girl who really liked you, not because you brought candy to give to every girl, but because you were the only guy who wasn't a d*ck-wad to me?
Of course not. You're busy several cities away, being a d*ck to some girl at your high school.
Remember how they forced it out of me?
Of course not. You're a pompous wad. Why should you care or even remember?
Remember Marine World?
That's probably the only thing you remember about this place.
Remember when I left?
Probably not... I hardly do and I had better memory than you.
Remember when Elaine left?
Of course not. You probably didn't even like her...
Remember all thos good times we had?
Well, I can hardly remember...
But you're busy at some school in Stockton, getting with Chris in the Philipines being a d*ck-wad to everyone around you and forgetting about the old faces that you used to know. You're too busy to smell the putrid sh*t you're walking in, the faces you stepped on and abused. You forget everything bad you did and justify them all with a "I was younger then".

Elaine, you were the only nice person who truly was nice back then and now you're gone... Well, time to look forward and hope that maybe I'll find you in the future.
Hey, do you remember Stephanie?
Right... You hardly even remember me... Nevermind...

(Also known as "Happy New Years, Bishes!")

]]> ~Nethray-of-Velec http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/16142755/ http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/16142755/ Fri, 28 Dec 2007 18:02:09 PST
I know it was hardly anything. I get so emotional sometimes, you know? I can't even remember why I ever even liked a faceless man. You were faceless at the time, anyway... Internet. What a stupid thing, really. Such drama, such torment, such emotion... And it's not even real. It wasn't really real was it? That's the sh*t of it all, really. I already know it wasn't real, but I couldn't convince myself back then. I didn't know the difference back then... Tylor, I loved you. I know it's not your fault. What do I do to tell that angry little 7th grader that, though? There isn't any convincing her otherwise by what she's told me.

Foolish little me to believe in love. It was all that I hoped for, though. Fame means nothing. Fortune is nothing. Happiness is not truly possible for me without true love. I can smile as much as it could possibly please you, damn therapists, but nothing lasts forever. Story books always told me of women finding true love with a kind hearted man and they would live happilly ever after. Even as I got older I hid in them from the bullies and from the world. They were the only things I held onto and now...

Tylor, I'm no longer going to hold onto the thought of you; that 7th grader's desperate wish to one day meet you face-to-face will be obliterated from my memories. Though your heart may beat in your chest, you are forever dead to me. I will never think of you again... If ever our paths meet again, well... I hope this new Jess/Neth won't fall for you again.

It's my fault we couldn't even stay friends...

]]> ~Nethray-of-Velec http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/16086249/ http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/16086249/ Mon, 24 Dec 2007 23:57:48 PST
I am loved - and not just by family. I feel some sort of family-like love towards folks outside of my family and even have started to feel happy about liking guys. L.B. and A.D. show signs of liking me. F.M. and I are going out - seeing each other. Can you believe it? I'm in a relationship! I.B.... God... Everything's so unclear. He doesn't hate me. He doesn't find me repulsive... He acts somewhat nervous near me. Not the kind of nervous where it's like "Oh god... What's she going to do now?" No... It's more like "She's talking to me! OH MY GOD! She's talking to ME!" I sincerely can't tell if it's negatively or positively and, because it's so unclear... I don't like being with F.M. We act so lovey dovey, but I feel it's only for show for his friends. Most of my gal-pals (My apologies to Kat and Mel for this term I've decided to put you two under) know I don't want to be with him. T.L. from biology and cultural geography heard me speak of my reasonings for wanting to break up with F.M. with it's true sincerity. So, here I am... So many people know my intention. God, I even think he knows it himself. Is that why he actually doesn't care if I don't talk to him - if I ignore him? Is it because he knows that if I had the courage to actually talk to him, ask to speak with him alone, I'll do it? Is it because I mentioned being treated for yet another case of depression? Is that it? A simple trophy girlfriend for him? Never do we talk about much. I'm thinking of dumping him over the phone. Impersonal, yes, but I still feel stuck even though he's far, far away now... F*ck... I need to break this binding chain that keeps me so miserable. Misery... He'd understand that, right? If you love someone let them go and all that mumbojumbo, yes?

Anyway, because of all this, I've been cutting myself. I've been rather stressed and I began to seek an answer from my therapist that I was hoping wouldn't be from my parents. His solution? Tell my folks, of course. I'll be evaluated and judgement will be passed as to whether or not I need meds.

Well, other than that, happy holidays, peeps!

]]> ~Nethray-of-Velec http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/15649120/ http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/15649120/ Sat, 24 Nov 2007 11:49:02 PST [X] Music is my life.
[X] sometimes I write poetry/song lyrics.
[X] My hair covers part of my face.
[X] I wear band shirts.
[ ] I know who Jeffree Star is.
[X] I wear converse.
[X] I wear vans.
[X] I have made a YouTube video.
[ ] I wear lots of eyeliner.

Total = 8

[ ] I have/had my lip peirced.
[ ] I listen to Saves The Day, Chiodos, Thursday and/or Gym Class Heroes.
[ ] I'm in a band.
[ ] My screen name has x's in it.
[X] I understand that My Chemical Romance is not emo.
[X] I also understand that Green Day is not emo.
[X] I have moshed.
[X] I have been hit by a mosher. (Ah... Cutie in the blue bandana... *sighs and looks off into the distance dreamilly*)
[X] I know what mosh means.
[X] I sit in corners often.

Total = 6

[X] I dislike MTV.
[ ] I take pictures of myself a lot.
[ ] ...especially ones where you can't see my whole face.
[ ] I live for Warped Tour
[X] I am lost without an mp3/cd player/ipod.
[X] I know that emo is not just a stereotype.
[ ] I could not live without my hair straightener.
[X] I have thick rimmed glasses.
[ ] I'm bi/gay.
[X] I'm not scared of bi/ gay people

Total = 4

[X] I hate the president.
[X]I have/had/wanted a mohawk.
[X] I wear black nail polish.
[X] I hate my parent(s).
[ ] I hate where i live
[X] I try to go to as many concerts as possible.
[X] Black is a great color.
[ ] Right now I am listening to music.
[ ] I know what hxc means.
[ ] I am straight edge.

Total = 6

[ ] Myspace = Love
[X] Hot Topic doesn't scare me.
[X] Some of my friends don't go to my school.
[X] I wear studded/skeletal belts.
[ ] I have had a body part signed by a band.
[ ] Ive cried while listening to Dashboard Confessional..
[X] I have worn guys jeans.
[ ] I'm madly in love with Pete Wentz!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
[ ] I find muscles scary.

Total = 4


Final Total = 28

Multiply by three... I'M 84% EMO

WHOOT! Wait... Wha? I'm less emo than ... Duuuuude.... Trippy... Ah, whatever...

]]> ~Nethray-of-Velec http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/15621595/ http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/15621595/ Thu, 22 Nov 2007 13:13:26 PST
Sorry, okay? I did it again! The four cuts on my right leg? The small gash on my left arm? Yup... That was me... No theater class accident, and nothing to do with Frida getting angry... F*ck... I'm sorry... I should totally be ashamed of myself, but...

One day, I'll know why I keep doing it... For now, I guess it's heartache... Why? All my problems are all self-inflicted! Why do I keep doing this? Self-inflicted heartache. Self-inflicted grade drop. Self-inflicted cuts and scars... F*ck...

]]> ~Nethray-of-Velec http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/15440236/ http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/15440236/ Fri, 09 Nov 2007 20:16:09 PST
If free and drinking a MONSTER, one may feel euphoric and laugh at everything - no matter how stupid. While on MONSTER and free to do whatever, you may even be so out of it that you threaten your best friend and her relationship with her boyfriend through your phone... You may even freak out waitresses with your rather high pitched giggles and fast-paced orders. I love this MONSTER buzz. You are the one freaking everyone else out and are happy the entire time. However, the other side of this coin is rather horrible...

When drinking a MONSTER and kept in an institution of sorts, you are forced to keep quiet and seated. Twitching is seen as a distraction and may cause punishment if taken to the extremes. These buzzes cause the buzzee to feel paranoid and hyper due to the inability to not laugh and giggle and feel euphoric. NOT A GOOD COMBO! It's actually rather horrible and actually feels the same way as being nervous and starving at school. Did I mention your legs failing three hours later? I guess I didn't...

I just downed an entire can of MONSTER and listening to some happyhardcore. Perhaps with this done, I can test more of MONSTER's ways on my body. Perhaps with hyper music playing, I'll simply start dancing to it and grow tired at a steady pace (Don't tell me the whole crash and burn thing. Believe me. Sugars and energy drinks run differently in my body. There is no crash.) Right now, I'm feeling rather quite sleepy, but I also want to dance... It doesn't look like this will be too fun a night...

Anyway, there's this other guy I like. I share Biology class with him and... Geez... In 8th grade, I promised myself that I'd find the nerdiest bunch of kids my age and... I found A.D and J.G the coolest guys ever... They're like ECHS version Magic and Blood but WAAAAAAAAY cooler! Actually... J.G is not as squirrelly as Magic, so... Nah, he's way cooler! But, then again... Okay, J.G and Magic compete in my mind as cool, but A.D beats Blood by a mile to me...

Maybe it's because I like him... Gosh... At least he doesn't bludgeon me with a yearbook like Blood.... That's always a good thing... My knees are starting to hurt. I'm scared because I have to cross the staircase if I want to go to bed... I don't want my legs failing on me! D: Okay, so... Yesterday he said that I brightened up his day... Gosh... Why is it that the cheesiest phrases have to be the ones that just make you want to swoon with delight? He's just so... *sigh* What does one do to get the attention of a psycho guy obsessed with death and lizards? (Not combined, mind you.) Does he even notice me beyond just being a friend. I think I'll tell him that I like him after fourth block on tuesday... I've got to finish the drawings I promised I'd do for him, of course, before hand... I really wouldn't want the weight of incompleted work to get in the way...

Monday is my birthday... I've gotten rather far on Velec, but I stepped on the last page of chapter two and need to re-do it because I got a foot print on it. I also still need to ink in the rest... Ah... At least I have a full month left. Maybe I'll finish ahead of time again... Maybe I'll be late... Oh noes!

I need to go search up some music for my party tomorrow. We're all gonna dance our asses off! (Though I'm still trying to wonder how we're going to achieve this party with my grandma around...)

]]> ~Nethray-of-Velec http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/15279758/ http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/15279758/ Mon, 29 Oct 2007 21:11:00 PDT
I found my old year book from last year. I miss those days. Back then, things felt more... Secure... I think I may be homesick... That may be it. For a while, I considered that school my second home. So many smiling faces... So many laughs, crying moments... A faint glow of innocence...

Where am I now? Where did I go? Who are these people?

Mom's complaining that a lot of my friends are guys. What right does she have to poke fun at me? She had more guy friends than she did girl friends in high school, as did Nikki. I see no problems in that. Okay, so for every three friends that are girls, I have roughly seven guy friends. So what? Wasn't that what my sister's ratio was? I don't see what's wrong with that...

I've changed so much... Who is that girl that looks back at me in my reflection? Was that girl who hissed at the sight of pink the same girl who had a beloved pink and lavender teddy bear? Is the emotional gal doodling in her binder the same little outcasted kindergartener whose only ability was to call for an adult? Am I really me? I used to think boys were gross, snot nosed creatures only able to sneeze and spew horrible words. Now, they're my friends. I can't really think of when this transition came into play...

All I know is that I'm feeling rather blah... I can't tell what it really is... I wish I could... The only feeling that I can identify in this blob of random emotionless emotion is simply coldness... I wish I knew which window was open right now... It's way cold...

]]> ~Nethray-of-Velec http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/15165031/ http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/15165031/ Sun, 21 Oct 2007 20:44:16 PDT Velec for the school year! Actually, I'm quite surprised I've even organized anything... Gosh... Who the hell am I and what have I done to the real Neth?

Anyway, here's the schedule, though it's probably going to change due to the small things life may throw at me...

Chapter 2:
Start date: Friday October 19, 2007
Online Upload date: Wednesday December 12, 2007

Chapter 3:
Start date: Thursday December 13, 2007
Online Upload date: Monday January 14, 2008

Chapter 4:
Start date: Tuesday January 15, 2008
Online Upload date: Tuesday February 12, 2008

Chapter 5:
Start date: Wednesday February 13, 2008
Online Upload date: Wednesday March 12, 2008

Chapter 6:
Start date: Monday March 17, 2008
Online Upload date: Friday April 18, 2008

From the dates Saturday April 19, 2008 to Saturday June 21, 2008, I plan on working on several other things such as Seisej's back story and Elyk's and Tunmar's back story. These will be the first two in a series of mini comics I will call Velec: tales of Interest.

Chapter 7:
Start date: Saturday June 21, 2008

From here, the plans get blurry and I'm still yet to figure out exact dates of finishing. For now, I've got my goals for Velec while in school. Once again, I must say that I may not stick to this schedule perfectly, but I will try...

]]> ~Nethray-of-Velec http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/15122674/ http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/15122674/ Thu, 18 Oct 2007 22:53:15 PDT
In other news, I've decided to take a break from group therapy. Not like one week or two. I mean, more or less, like a month. It's a kind of experiment. Kind of like a smoker who's just stopped smoking in a way. I'm going to see if I can get through it without lighting my head on fire everytime my scanner angers me. So far, I'm near the end of week 2 of 4... I hope I make it... I really do. High school is enough of a social hour for me and, given the fact that Akasha seems to find my therapy work acceptable, I can listen to plenty of the problems my fellow maniacs have lodged themselves into anytime outside of the therapy room... Well, I just hope that the day I find myself able to rant and vent without interruption or dirty looks is soon... Gosh... I miss 'em already! D:

]]> ~Nethray-of-Velec http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/14930517/ http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/14930517/ Fri, 05 Oct 2007 17:37:02 PDT We got out early, so why would I want to do school-related functions?!

Anyway, right after school today I hung out with Mel and my friends* Jingles, Ichi-thulu, Hoodie, Tina, and Jimmy at the Plaza. We hung out at Barnes and Nobles and attempted to go to PetCo, but were kicked out because we were school kids and it was still only about 2 PM. So, with lack of anything to do, Mel, Jimmy, and I went over to Jimmy's house, leaving the rest at the Plaza to get picked up. We had so much fun! We played Pokemon and traded... I got excluded, then brought back into the cricle of friends. Then, I was forced to choose what pokemon in my party I didn't want... I got emotional over my staravia. Afterwards, we went to Mel's house, then to mine - but Jimmy headed back to his house...

Anyway, I broke a lot of the rules that my mother had set for me: 1. No goofing off. 2. Call if you leave the Plaza. 3. No going past the freeway. (This rule seems to ALWAYS be around, no matter what. Even before I decided that I wanted to walk around town often...)
It feels good to break these rather confining rules. I know my mom's just out to protect me and all, but really, now... Well, before today, I hardly had a valid reason to get into that part of the neighborhood, anyway... Now, I have a perfect reason: a have friends who live beyond the boundaries my parents had set for me... The known territory has grown a bit for me...

*The names on this list have been changed for the protection of the peoples... Like the fact that I only call Jimmy "Jimmy" because he reminded me of Jimmy from JtHM the first time I saw him...

]]> ~Nethray-of-Velec http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/14892784/ http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/14892784/ Tue, 02 Oct 2007 22:58:59 PDT !

Here are the rules (FOR LIFE!):
1. Post these rules.
2. Each person tagged must post eight random (hopefully interesting) facts about themself.
3. Tagged people should write a journal of these facts.
4. At the end, post eight more deviants you wish to tag.
5. Go to their page and leave a comment telling them they're tagged

--------------

1. I like this one guy, this other guy, another guy, and this one dude...
2. I have contemplated suicide and whether or not it's for me
3. Suicide is not for me
4. I like to draw to escape the sorrows and strife of everyday life, but lately it feels like that is one of my main strifes
5. I don't have a cold anymore (Sort of)
6. I like cats
7. I have no actual workspace for when I draw...
8. I am not the spawn of Satan (And it's so true!)


----------

I don't know if we can or can not tag people already tagged - or stated to have been tagged by the person who just tagged me. So, my apologies, people I shall tag, for I don't speak to you guys much and this seems out of the blue...

TAGGED:
PLEASE DON'T KILL ME!

]]> ~Nethray-of-Velec http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/14892254/ http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/14892254/ Tue, 02 Oct 2007 21:48:48 PDT MUST hate my existence and all happiness that dares try to fill the void! Ah... I can still see him in his blue jacket, sitting against the fence that guarded the alleyway between room 25 and 24A... I can still hear him saying how he had already memorized almost all of his monologue... I can still remember that brief moment just before I was pulled away to that accursed other side of the campus! Why?! He's cute. He's funny... He notices the differences between the ears of various elves and makes comments about them just to strike up a conversation! He compliments my drawings from biology...

What's up with emotions, anyway? It's times like this I must agree with Johnny, however insane he is. Excess, he called it. All of it is just excess... True, I wish to find love in this world, but... A song my mother loved to listen to during long car rides stated, "All you get from love is a love song." What is love, anyway? What does one really feel when they are in this... Love? Why does it feel like rational thought and all sense of self-control seem to be erased from your mind? Where did the butterflies in one's stomach come from? Talking to him makes me feel happy...

I'll agree with Meli on this. The suddenness of diving into high school seems to have made me just want to scream "F*CK YEAH!" but why? Things are begining to settle. The wonders of public school are begining to settle and the dusty cloud created by the wonders has now revealed a wall of horrors and a wave of illness and guess who just ran right into it? I really can't wait for next semester all of a sudden. New classmates, new classes... Perhaps I won't share another class with him... But, then again... It may just put a void in my time, no longer filled with the strange, intoxicating emotion that I know is more than likely infatuation...

Things are clearer now than they were in 7th grade... Still, I wish I could turn back the hands of time... At least before I stalked people I couldn't actually get a hold of - people who lived nearly across the bay from where I could go... Now... I know his schedule. I know his home-street... I know who his friends are, his connections with people... God, no one has a sense of shutting up around school, do they? Once they find their friends, they begin to jabber, unaware of who's close behind. But, none of them know who I like... Well, except for my friends, but that's the only ones that I've actually told. Who haven't I told? Gosh... Not Sex, I believe... Not directly, anyway...

Anyway, I've come to the conclusion that the fates hate me. But, you know what? If they truly, truly hated me, the lock on my door wouldn't work!

]]> ~Nethray-of-Velec http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/14820658/ http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/14820658/ Thu, 27 Sep 2007 22:22:34 PDT Yey!) but whatever...

Anyway, haven't been online for the past four days. Perhaps it was that lack of internet? (The computer keeps my most basic needs at bay. Hunger, sleep, etc. are all rendered harmless while online.) Perhaps it was the lack of sleep I've been giving myself lately? Perhaps I caught it from a friend? Anyway, I've returned to say I may or may not be online this weekend. Love Fest is saturday and mom's going to the salon to retouch her hair sunday. More than likely, she'll want me to come along... Don't even ask about Friday...

I'm going to go and log off, now... It's currently 10:20 and I've been trying to stay mainly in my room at this time lately... God... I could have had the entire day online today, you know that? I was that sick this morning! Oh, how I don't want to blemish my current record!

PS: Progress report card night was Tuesday. I got uber-awesome grades! But, that just comes naturally, I guess... The work they're giving us is like Elementary school work! Except for the state memorization... That sh*t is hard, man! D:

]]> ~Nethray-of-Velec http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/14735981/ http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/14735981/ Fri, 21 Sep 2007 22:26:22 PDT
Well, everything until today's been pretty wicked. A few stares at my miss-matched socks? Yeah... Disorganization at the comic-book club? Isn't there always? The missed chance to join the beading club? I guess... But, it was all normal. I got my micron - my most prized - back from some guys who share English and Cultural Geography with me. Sh*t... I'd been missing it for a long time, now... I felt incomplete without it... Did you know I got it from WonderCon '07? Did you know that the one that was missing was my thinnest line, 01? Did you know that that was what put Issej's Kanaranadorian Spell on the trim of her sleeves ([link]) ? Did you know that that was the exact pen I used when tracing Livi's nose the first time I inked her in ([link]) ? Did you know that it was the very pen I thought my most valuable? Microns are not like ball point pens... I once had the skill to use a ball point pen to go over my lines, but ever since I started using Microns... Do you realize how much white-out I'm to use now that I have to resort back to ball-points? It's not very fun... It's broken now...

This gallery fills me with sorrow, now... I look at my work and see the exact materials I used for each piece, you know that?

[link] : 08 Micron for outer facial lines, 05 Micron for hair, 01 Micron for shadow-lines, worn sharpie for hair, peach colored pencil used very lightly for skin, blue colored pencil for eyes.

[link] : 08 Micron for outer lines and all of glasses, 05 for some of the bigger details (eyes, etc.), 01 for fishnet gloves and zipper, colored pencils.

[link] : 08 Micron for outer lines, 05 Micron for all details, crayon

I hate this... I have to go to Micheal's before November, but my parents don't seem to have any time on their hands. Sister? She's working all the time! Bus it? God, if it were THAT simple, I wouldn't be this pissed! Where's the therapist when you need them? Dr. K, the group therapist, has been on vacation and my mom hasn't schedule a session with my old therapist in forever... I hate this. I'm as happy as I can be during the weekdays. Come the weekend and I'm just f*cking miserable!

Other than the fact that my favorite pen's broken, Velec's going well... The process has been cut slow, but it's going... Damn ball-points... I hate this! Damn you, PK (Kid who aparently took my pen in the first place)! If you're reading this (highly doubtful but... You know) know that you have been marked as my #1 enemy! D:<

PS: The title is based off of a quote from John Steinback's The Pearl... Except, like, instead of a pen, it's a boat. Same general idea, if you think of it... A pen cannot defend itself. It cannot have sons, and a broken boat cannot heal... Funny... I value my pen more than I now value PK's limbs at the moment... I need to find some mints or something... That ought to calm me down...

]]> ~Nethray-of-Velec http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/14691966/ http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/14691966/ Tue, 18 Sep 2007 18:20:00 PDT
It's pretty fun, though. I'm not afraid to show my affection by completely annoying him. It's something kind of new to me... Usually I'm too shy to talk to them, but he... He's so different... Like Blood, that dude Meli liked... Except... Less cute... And no poofy hair... And no mustache... And rather nice... Vaguely pompous - but that sort of comes with it, I guess. He's a bit of a teacher's pet, but, yeah...

In other news, I joined this club for aspiring artists on campus. Unofficial, mind you, but fun. It's kind of unorganized as well. They tried electing me for the club's president, also. It didn't work, though. I would have resigned, but the president took his job - oh did he take it. So, I'm not president. Cool... I think I'm going to ditch out tomorrow at lunch to hang out with my friends. Yeah...

]]> ~Nethray-of-Velec http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/14649798/ http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/14649798/ Sat, 15 Sep 2007 19:49:37 PDT
Well, to put simply, my parents are trying to make me a better child. One with no real attitude towards anything or anyone. So... Like, what? A zombie of sorts? Yeah, kind of hard when they can only see the negatives...

Today, I was the kindest possible when answering my dad! Is it really my fault I answered him 12 times already for the same question? No. We didn't go to Ross. is it that hard to understand?! He's supposed to be the one who can understand things better than me!

Come now. Yes, I answered quietly (It's not like he says things quietyl, either). But, as soon as I raise my voice, it's instantly read as attitude. I said it LOUDLY. I did not get an attitude, he did. Let's just make that clear! I f*cking hate it when they get like that! I'm trying, okay?! I'm trying to tolerate it! I'm trying to be kinder! To make it worse, they always approach me whenever I'm at my worst - whenever I'm the least approachable! Then, they say I'm getting worse! WHAT THE F*CK?! It's so f*cking annoying! Why does everyone in this household have to have problems!?

I wish I wasn't afraid of running away. I'm certain that's my ticket out yet I refuse to take it... You know, I wanted to not too long ago... Stupid shrink... Thanks to her, last time I thought about it, I had to tell my parents... They don't like it when I have my own problems. It just adds to the pile. DAMN IT! I wish the worlds in my head existed. I wish I could just go to Velec and stay there, perhaps join Captain Nyl's crew and hunt for treasure forever more. Maybe I could become a traveling magician, seeing the four corners of my pencil-on-lined-paper map and earning my meals by performing dazzling tricks and feats. Escapism, thou art my curse...

I'm just pissed off... I'm trying, but my parents won't give me a chance... How can one grow upwards if there is a wall not too far above your head? How can my parents say they want to understand me if they won't even give me a chance? It's like being a stranger in my own house! What's worse is that no matter what the expect of me, they'll always expect something in the oposite direction as well. Be more maleable to others' requests. Keep an iron will and don't do anything you don't want to. Be a kind and loving girl. Show everyone that you can stand up for yourself. Stay the same! You need to change! Oh, how I loathe them...

But, I love them... They just have sticks up their asses. Mind you, these sticks are sideways... If they understood that that was how I felt about them, perhaps they'd understand why I'd rather sleep than be in the waking world, rather stay online than go out into the world, and would rather drown myself in music than listen to their mindless chatter... Damned if I do, damned if I don't, really... Even if I did listen to them more than I do now, would they be satisfied? Knowing my parents, that's a serious no... They've made art a chore to me, as they did showing any physical affection to them... I'd seriously give a sea urchin a bear hug before I gave my parents one... I'd rather put my head in a lion's mouth than have a nice conversation with them... Oh, if only those animals were available in this household to I could prove it...

]]> ~Nethray-of-Velec http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/14582012/ http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/14582012/ Mon, 10 Sep 2007 20:54:31 PDT *In Preview man's Voice*Coming Soon to a Computer Screen Near You...

In a world fraught with war and fears
"I once dreamed of a fire that consumed us all... In the flames, lives a demon prince... He gave me a choker and said that it belonged to a woman named Ivedre. He said that this woman was shrouded only in fears that consumed and, eventually, destroyed her..."
Where pirates sail to the four corners of the map
"You call that 'Navigation', Elyk?! I've seen Grassastomps do better!"
And demons and vampires alike roam
"Ifrid... She is one wicked demonness. A dominatrix, so I've heard..."
Only love can repair the shattered mirror of the peoples' mind...

This is the story of love, hate, piracy on the high seas, and war.
This is...
"Caissej... RUN!!"
...Velec: The Land of Warring Lives

Ah, yes... I restarted my ingenious story, Velec: The Land of Warring Lives and I even came up with what day I wish to finish chapter 1 (Not the coloring, though)
Ah... What is this date, you ask?! November 12th, my 14th birthday! It's a present for myself, okay? Shut up! My pig keychain commands it! D:<

]]> ~Nethray-of-Velec http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/14562090/ http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/14562090/ Sun, 09 Sep 2007 13:41:34 PDT him. Oh, my little Ass-Punk, how I cared so much for you. It was simply that fact that makes me feel total repulsion when I think of that giddy 7th grader that felt so much love - only to find that it was all a lie. Why didn't you let go, stupid little 7th grader, so full of hate now? Why did you let it all affect you, your pain and misery consuming you whole and rotting your heart? Why, fate, did you let her find him that night? Why, fate, did you make them friends? Why, fate, did you let his girlfriend dump him? Why, fate, did you have her around to comfort him that night? WHY?! STUPID FATE! STUPID 7TH GRADER! Wake up from your stupid dreams! You never ended up happy, afterall, did you?! Why can't you just learn your lesson?! Why? You had to buy that ring, didn't you? You felt so close to him, so in love... Now what?!

Stupid me... That 7th grader was me... How many times have I died, now? There was that innocent 1st grader who died of sorrow and lonliness, the 6th grader who died of regret, the 7th grader that died of a broken heart, and now, here stands the Freshman with knees weak and heart fluttering because of him, that boy I like. They're dead... But... Didn't I vow my heart to the lonesome cold of steel? Why do I have feeling there? Why? Why can't I learn my lessons? Is there a price I'm still yet to pay? If I ever find you, Cupid, I'm going to break your arms... Hear me? QUIT MESSING WITH ME, CUPID! Why must I go down this path everyday?! F*CK YOU, CUPID! F*UCK YOU AND ALL YOU CAUSED ME TO FEEL!

I have an experiment I have to do for biology class. What better than the size of crickets vs the time it takes for Ethyl Acetate (A poison used by bug catchers to kill their "prey" without damaging the exoskeleton and stuff...) to affect it? Ah, nothing like getting a grade for killing something small and innocent!

PS: The very last page was actually on that day I cut my leg on accident. Was I really that stupid that I thought I was going to die from such a little scrape? I obviously don't bleed too often... Regrets? I had them. I wrote down only one on that page. I regretted everything I said that eventually struck me down and sent me into weekly therapy sessions.

But, I never wrote the whole thing... I regretted everything I did in my past that caused that little child within me to die a painful death. I regretted just standing there in the airport that day when Elaine left for the Philipines. I regret not standing up for myself in 1st grade. I regret befriending that bully in 6th grade who caused me nothing but pain. I regret not being really close to my grandfather before he died. I regret not realizing that it was a funeral. I regret smiling at the funeral... I mean, what the f*ck was I thinking? Why the hell was that little kid so happy back then? I was happy with my life back then. It wasn't the best life. It was just... Innocent...

Why'd they have to ruin it? Why did those little pig-bastards have to make my life miserable once I got into Kindergarten? What was wrong with me?! Why was I picked out and beaten on? Why'd they have to choose me? Was it because I dragged my backpack instead of keeping it on my back? I wasn't perfect, I know that, but neither were they! What did I do to them? So Mrs. Pain thought I was a genious! What of it? Before that damned hell-hole, I lived in a happy world. I lived in a world without bullies and pain... What did I do to deserve their laughs and torments? What did I do to you guys that made you compelled to ostracize (can't spell correctly at the moment) me? Was it because I had imagination? I remember those games we played... It was because I couldn't jump rope, wasn't it? It was because I kept on mulling over the words for various jump rope rhymes, unable to keep my feet moving while I thought...

Or... was it because I was happy enough to skip every now and then? It was that, wasn't it? And then, when I finally saw you guys again, you all acted like nothing happened... You had the nerve to dance with me - the nerve to act like we were always friends and I was just insane - delusional about what really happened... Why is that? Did you guys really forget? You called me slow-poke, said I had slowpoke-itis... What was wrong with me, then? WHAT THE HELL WAS WRONG WITH ME!?

]]> ~Nethray-of-Velec http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/14522939/ http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/14522939/ Thu, 06 Sep 2007 20:32:56 PDT
So, today I went to Anime Club. Eh... I'm not really into it at the moment. All they do is watch TV, man! I love anime as much as the next gal, but seriously, now... I was hoping it was going to be... Oh, I dunno... A club? Like one of those clubs where people have conversations and stuff? Instead, it was just another lunch room where the (anime) nerds sat there, the cool (anime) people sat over somewhere else, the (anime) jokers sat in the corner, and the (anime) misfits sat in that little space by the door and trash. Just another lunch room, really, and for that, I feel sort of... Eh...

But, it was in there, that I saw him - made sure it was him. He recognised me, and, though it took a moment, I realized it was him. Strange... Though the schools are close by, I thought he went to this other school in the district... I don't know just yet what's up... I just feel weird now... Strange. I had a dream he was SHOT and came back to life as Yugi from Yu-Gi-Oh!, only his hair was backwards colorwise. You know, usually that causes one some weird feelings about things, you know?

Ah... Right when I felt comfortable in school... He's still cute, though...

]]> ~Nethray-of-Velec http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/14509234/ http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/14509234/ Wed, 05 Sep 2007 20:39:00 PDT
Anyway, today was like any other day. I woke up, had breakfast, and went to school. WRONG. Wednesday: at high school, this is the day of differentness. What was so different, you ask? It all began when the student body president went around the freshman classes, announcing that there were not enough candidates. School politics... They're the first stop for an aspiring politician (Who would have guessed?), but I've never been into it myself. I believe strongly in the whole "With great power comes great responcibilty" thing, and, geez... As much as I would love to dictate the freshman masses, I just don't feel up to it, you know? Too much preassure - I'd feel like I stole someone else's skin... I'd be noticed too much, you know? NINJAS CAN NOT BE NOTICED, NOR CAN PINJAS AND NIRATES.

Okay, so with that done, we had to go back to our regualr wrok: warm ups and study guide pages. Then, we took some dictated notes Ah, that's when it happened...

I was doodling in my notes. When I looked up at the dude that I've been TOTALLY crushing on (What? Don't you sheepishly look up at people you like, hoping they don't catch you sneeking a peek at their outfit - and on that rare occasion, the side of their face - and how they're sitting? Am I the only one who has obsession problems?!), he smiles at me and gives me a thumbs up. Like, what did he mean?! Nikki says he TOTALLY knows, but why? How? It's not like I plain and simple wrote it down for the whole world to see! For Pete's sake, he sits ever so close to me!

The day ended with a painfully (I was wearing these horrible penny-loafer like shoes that pinched at my toes and went flappy by my ankles) happy train of thoughts home. I wonder what tomorrow holds!

]]> ~Nethray-of-Velec http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/14473993/ http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/14473993/ Mon, 03 Sep 2007 15:00:44 PDT Pan's Labrynth and a very confusing game of Dungeons and Dragons. Well, I got to sleep at 4 A.M. last night and woke up roughly at Noon. I had a wonderful breakfast of spam and eggs with a bit of fried rice. I then lounged around watching part of the Kappa Mikey marathon - then got bored because they played one of my least favorite episodes. I began watching the Pokemon Marathon, but got bored even before I could get to comercial...

Now, I'm back online. After two days straight online, I've returned. Online... Still bored... Feeling kind of like sh*t... Tomorrow I have school. That ought to be fun... Sleepless, but fun...

]]> ~Nethray-of-Velec http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/14439466/ http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/14439466/ Sat, 01 Sep 2007 10:33:50 PDT
Anyway, I'd like to officially say that I've gotten over Number One Crush guy. T'was a crush and nothing more... Alas, why must it be fate that the only way to get over one guy is to crush on another? Who's the new lucky man, you ask? He shares Biology and Theater class with me. He's got a sense of humor and a wicked do! Ah... High school... The joys of not feeling totally obligated to say hi to him. Stupid meekness... Because of that, I hardly think he notices me or even knows that I exist - other than the fact that I voted he should be thrown off a cliff... What? I have a thing against guys that make me actually feel anything... Ever since him (Not Number One Crush guy. Some other dude...)

Also, I'm going to be home alone all day. I don't have much homework, and I'll save it for tonight/tomorrow. I'll be online most of this time, but I also want to get out - maybe take a hike up this awesome hill that has a nice view of the town (Not going to identify which town) and possibly paint it. I've had an urge to paint for a while now, actually. Stupid school schedule making it impossible to paint on the weekdays! I'll be online most of the day though, and I'm thinking of drawing the people who I was supposed to draw in the Art Freebies Guild on Gaia. That ought to be fun! Nothing like attempting to draw others' avatars and OCs to try and keep things out of mind! Next thing I know, it'll be 6 and Nikki'll get home from work!

]]> ~Nethray-of-Velec http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/14415896/ http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/14415896/ Thu, 30 Aug 2007 19:13:25 PDT
High school's been awesome (Yes. I only started Tuesday. So?). I missed the Anime Club's meeting today, so I'm kinda pissed. The only information on it was sent by, sadly, e-mail. Damn it, right? I have the full four blocks, unfortunately, but my fourth block class just freakin' rocks! English 1 Advanced... I'm surprised I got into this class, but, eh... I also have biology, cultural geography, and theater. Theater's one of the wicked awesome classes. I'll admit, I wish I wasn't stuck being a techie. The only thing about techies that I like is that they're in charge of making the set. Cool, right? Actual acting (For everyone) begins next semester, so I can't wait!

I have to log off soon, so I can't post anything that I've drawn - not like I really have much. To the people who know me on Gaia (Especially the Art Freebie Guild), I'll be back sometime this weekend - hopefully tomorrow if I don't have a lot of homework. I may actually work on it Sunday, but, you know... Hopefully, my parents will go out of town with my aunt this saturday. They mentioned LA, so yeah...

Anyway, I started redrawing Velec. I actually haven't had much time. I got... Nothing, really... Eh... I hate this. I keep redoing it! D: I'll update El Chupacabra (I have the page done. I just keep forgetting to post it) later and maybe do the next page for Dying to Live... Oh, just think when I'm old enough to work! Ugh... I wonder if I need the worker's permit if I want to work during the summer...

]]> ~Nethray-of-Velec http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/14365375/ http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/14365375/ Mon, 27 Aug 2007 13:31:15 PDT
So, school starts tomorrow and oh how I just can't wait! No more uniformed people! No more hordes of recognizable people! Finally, halls upon halls of strangers... Well, technically, the school I'm going to is under construction and all class are being taken in portables so... Portables and portables of strangers! A whole new begining! Yey!

But, this all comes at a price. *sigh* Should've stuck with that private Catholic high school, shouldn't I? Going to public school means that my parents are going to be totally stricter than usual... They're not going to let me online except for the really important stuff. Only on the computer, in fact, for only the important stuff! Ugh!

Ah well... See ya on the flip-side, guys! Neth: out!

]]> ~Nethray-of-Velec http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/14001510/ http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/14001510/ Fri, 03 Aug 2007 12:45:19 PDT

So, during the trip to Oregon, we were staying in a town known as Ashland. A lovely town, really. Awesome restaurants (Steaks cooked to a lovely perfection and nachos so amazing you'd think you've died and gone to heaven!), cute stores that actually had cats living there, and a particular store that struck all of my family's interest. I'll never forget it - the scent, the music, and the wares they kept. Though my sister bought many an outfit, my interest was held by only one thing: a bracelet - blue in color and mysterious all-together. It was beautiful - and, now that I think about it, probably to beautiful and precious for a child like me...

The man who sold it to us told us that it was made of a special stone - a stone meant for healing. Perhaps buying the healing incense they were selling would have been better, for now I have lost the spectacular bracelet. I feel horrible...

Anyway, yesterday was my sister Nikki's birthday. I got her this book she really liked: The Gashlycrumb Tinies. It's a rather morbid book about children dying of various ways - each child's name linked to a letter of the alphabet (Eg. "A is for Amy who fell down the stairs. B is for Basil asulted by bears.") She says that when she has children, she's going to teach them the alphabet using this book... Alas, sometimes I wonder about my sister...

]]> ~Nethray-of-Velec http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/13964181/ http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/13964181/ Tue, 31 Jul 2007 23:36:40 PDT
Perhaps I should rethink my life - ACTUALLY, perhaps I should get a key to my room so as to lock it once my sister moves into her own room. I'm quite tired of my stuff going missing simply because my grandmother finds it fit to bury it under 7 years worth of stuff...

Perhaps I should stop chasing after the oposite sex - perhaps stop chasing after the hopeless thing called love... Do I over think things? Could this all just change course if I got one boy friend that wasn't an ass wipe? (And wasn't like talking to a horny lamp post?)

I think I'll ask my parents for a key to my room when they get home from work tomorrow. Ever so rarely are the keys to the inside rooms used, but this is an emergency... I've asked kindly for the past three months. My room is at its needed cleanness. (Meaning, I CAN see the floor...)

I need to change a lot of things about me. I need to pursue other things... Also, I need to draw more... I only have a few weeks of summer left and I've been wasting it on the damn computer! GOD! My parents might take away my drawing utensils once school starts!

]]> ~Nethray-of-Velec http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/13913041/ http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/13913041/ Sat, 28 Jul 2007 11:07:08 PDT ) Sorry for not posting. My parents forgot the laptop and, to top it, when I finally got my hands on a computer, the front desk said that the internet was down...

Anyway, we first went to Portland. The hotel we stayed at was one of greatness. They allowed pets and whatnot, they had a 24 hour pool, fitness center, buissness center, and other things. It was an awesome town, but it felt... Lacking... Of course, that was before my family and I went to Powel's, the largest bookstore in the U.S. (I know who'd love that!) Of course, we could stay long because my mom wanted to leave - five minutes after we entered the store! I mean, WTF?! We're at the largest bookstore in the country, a place with almost every book published in the U.S., and she wants to leave?! I mean, they had a cafe and everything! They even had a freakin' birthday card ROOM. Doesn't she like b-day cards, at least? I mean, I know my mom and gram don't get along, but, SHEESH! We also stopped by Tilamook. They have good ice cream, but rude people working at the counters.

We left Portland and headed off to the KAO Kampgrounds - a place with fun. My sister and I rented trikes (They had no bikes, first off, and second off, I can't ride a bike...) and I fell! I fell of a tricycle! Later, we roasted marshmallows and made smores. It was nice.

The final third of our trip was Ashland. It lacked nothing. The hotel was amazing, the hotel rooms were gigantic, and my sister and I got to go watch Taming of the Shrew. It was awesome.

Then we returned. The border between Oregon and California is a hot place, indeed. The sun beat down on the yellow fields of dying grass and, once in the Bay Area, it was like... Whoa... Gloom above, man!

But I wouldn't trade it for the world. It's good to be back...

Oh, and I didn't have a chance to draw. Sorry!

]]> ~Nethray-of-Velec http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/13826376/ http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/13826376/ Sat, 21 Jul 2007 21:30:44 PDT
Okay, anyway, I'm going to be gone all day tomorrow. Maybe I'll be back Monday (If I have time.) YES! The road trip! Not going to be much, in all truth. There's going to be some hiking and such and,. when I get back, new artses for my dedicated fans (Inner voice: What fans, Bozo?!) Yey! For now, I leave in the morning with nothing more to say but the fact that I'll return Friday - perhaps Saturday depending what time I get home.

OREGON HERE I COME! >:-D

]]> ~Nethray-of-Velec http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/13802062/ http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/13802062/ Thu, 19 Jul 2007 23:41:51 PDT [link]
I dunno if you can view it if you're not logged into the Smack Jeeves forum. I really don't, but it's an awesome rant, man. It's from the heart.

Anyway, the bottom braces are in. I can't get the top 'till they yank out the Wisdoms. It hurts, it really does. It also feels like a second set of teeth plastered on your real ones! Neato, no?

Well, check out the rant. I'm going on the Road Trip Sunday, so I dunno if I'll be around. I don't want to stop drawing on the roadtrip, but I don't want to be on the computer (Nethray not on the computer?! Impossible! D:< )

]]> ~Nethray-of-Velec http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/13787105/ http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/13787105/ Wed, 18 Jul 2007 20:34:09 PDT
Alas, I pray it be a fair day tomorrow. I pray it be alright. I pray I'll be able to eat again...

]]> ~Nethray-of-Velec http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/13732196/ http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/13732196/ Sat, 14 Jul 2007 11:50:27 PDT and we went to Nations. Afterwards, me and my sister dropped her off and my family went to this awesome ice cream joint called "Fenton's". Yeah... The last sweet thing I've had: a milkshake. Mmmm.... It was good... THEN we went to the orthododists place to get spacers put into my molers. Ho-ly crap. Pain beyond belief, man! Well, at first, anyway... After a minute or two, the pain subsided and was replaced with a rubbery feeling. THEN, two hours later, the rubbery feeling was gone and the pain took over. Now, it wasn't harsh pain. I just didn't feel like eating because of it... HOWEVER, Friday morning/afternoon (I woke up at 1 PM. What can I say?) was greeted with the most horrendous oral pain beyond any belief... I couldn't eat my sammich T_T.

Anyway, to take away from those moments of pain, I went to this all ages place. The Phenomanauts... Awesome band. I moshed. Got totally high on NOTHING (Don't you just love yet hate that? I mean its like, your happy about the moment, but your like mad cuz you don't know what caused it and you don't know if it'll ever come back...). So, in the end, the dental pai was worth it... Well, if worth it means almost getting a black eye from Cutie in the blue bandana... Seriously, dude. Everyone's just jumping, pushing, and, well, MOSHING! I mean, words of advise: If you are going to mosh, or even stand anywhere near the mosh pit: MOSH. Mosh for your life!

It was totally fun, but it felt good to finally get home and sleep... Okay, I fell asleep at three... Ah well... In the end, it was all worth it.

]]> ~Nethray-of-Velec http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/13694395/ http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/13694395/ Wed, 11 Jul 2007 10:53:07 PDT
I have to settle with cereal for breakfast and a sammich for lunch... I'm old enough to dial 911, for Pete's sake! I know what to do in a fire! I CAN RUN OUT THE DOOR! There ARE adults currently at the house (Construction workers working on Nikki's room. YEY! Only a few more weeks and she'll get the hell out of my room! >:-D) and I KNOW I can get Frida, Sunny, and Midnight (my pet budgies) out of the house pretty easilly if a fire were to occur.

But, seriously now... I'm just bored. Bored. BORED. BORED.

]]> ~Nethray-of-Velec http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/13627398/ http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/13627398/ Thu, 05 Jul 2007 22:38:13 PDT
I've known that for a few months. You know, I guess that's that. I have f*cked up teeth as it is, but FURTHER investigation has been put into my teeth! I hate this! Not only do I have impacted canines, but aparently I have an over-bite that will continue to get worse until I turn 18 (despite braces, retainers, etc. etc.) This sucks... Both sides of my family have records of f*cked up teeth. My lucky-ass sister to have only needed braces! I need surgery now and in the far-off future, dude, and it f*cking sucks... D: I'm still getting braces, but for my upper jaw. That's the only thing that CAN be fixed at the moment...

Hate this! F*cking hate this! (My apologies. I haven't had coffee in a while and it's getting kinda late... Okay, 10:37, currently, but I had to get up early... Early for Summer Vacation, anyway...)

]]> ~Nethray-of-Velec http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/13612147/ http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/13612147/ Wed, 04 Jul 2007 19:57:50 PDT
Okay, so to anyone in the US, happy 4th of July (To You!). To anyone not, um... Happy not-so-special July 4th, probably just a regular old day where the only probable need for celebration is an aniversary/birthday/random party.

Well, this year was different than the rest of the 4th of July celebrations that I have been forced to go through. THIS YEAR, we actually decided to NOT deal with the sh*t permeating from my gram's side of the family (Seriously... You decide to, like, draw instead of play family frisbee or you don't think school is all that fun, or you'd rather be by yourself or with other kids than talk to your aunts and uncles and you're instantly outcasted for the rest of your life! Hell, I made quite an impression that'll last forever... So what if I didn't want to continue bible study?) by going to a barbeque in one of the parks far, far away from home...

Instead, we went to the mall... Oh, normally I would be upset, but this was a cool mall. This was like one of the very few malls that fill me with a horrible feeling of terror! For once, I was HAPPY to be at the mall!

Oh, how happiness can be short-lived... Anyway, the story is: I see some uber-cool twisty-crayons things at Sanrio. Unwittingly, my sister glorifies them to the point where I simply NEEDED them (Hey, my colored pencils are starting to run low... You can't blame me! I need a new material to color with!) We ran over to the nearby Macy's to find my mom to ask her for some money (We only had $1 and it was $5.95... I don't think the lady working there would have apprietiated that.) So, we ran off to go buy them when my sister got distracted by a shoe shop. Luckilly, I was able to kill time and boredom by going to a Border's Book Store that was nextdoor to the shoe shop (Convienience!), but my sister took the money with her.

So, I'm reading for a good half an hour when my sister comes along and says she's going to look at dresses. Okay. Reasonable enough. It was, afteralll, still early.

An entire hour passes by before I realise my phone's running out of battery. I called and found out she wasn't in the dress shop anymore. She was at H&M looking at jackets! Okay, okay... She's at the mall. I'm at the mall. It's early. It won't close that soon!

So, somehow, we're dragged back to Macy's where my sister goes shoe shopping. We're there for Hell knows how long and only then does it come to mind that the mall is closing!

I never did get the crayons and, as childish as it may seem, I'm pissed about that... Everyone else got to buy something. I guess it's wierd... I value drawing utensils over clothing, yeah, but clothing stores make me nervous thanks to dehydration-induced headaches due to the fact that my mom was often so busy trying on clothes, she didn't even check to see if I needed water... Alas...

My sister says we'll go to Sanrio one of these days to buy it... I would have been cool with just keeping the $20 my mom gave us for Sanrio and other needs, but no... She took THAT as well... -_-

I miss when my sister was a teenager. She actually thought things through better. She was actually cool back then. We didn't fight about stupid stuff. And even more so, she would have realised that I had my phone and was capable of buying the crayons myself. Instead, she just had me wait at Borders for her only to realise I had my phone right when I began running through the mall in a frantic hurry with a fleeting hope of Sanrio being open... F*ck... She's beginning to become as dimwitted as most of the adults in my life. ]]> ~Nethray-of-Velec http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/13589713/ http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/13589713/ Tue, 03 Jul 2007 08:11:21 PDT
Everything's all better except for the fact that I'm still wondering what the effects of taking cocaine and pot at the ssame time would do. Not to me anymore, anywho... My sister's friend, Pahee, said he'd beat the shit out of me if I took cocaine (They know I'll experiment in High school... Somehow, they see a younger version of all of them in me - and in them I see older versions of me and my friends...)

Okay, that's all for now. I gotta go wake up my sister for f*cking yoga class... ]]> ~Nethray-of-Velec http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/13545930/ http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/13545930/ Fri, 29 Jun 2007 23:43:19 PDT

Further into that, I found that I have a blood test tomorrow. Can't eat for twelve hours. Okay, cool. I had a large dinner anyway. I'm cool (Read bellow to find why I'm pissed about this)

Punch buggy game gone wrong when my mom punched me TWICE for one punch buggy, making a point that I punched her twice (Yeah... For two DIFFERENT punch buggies... -__-). Now, I get it. I punch HARD, but I felt unheard when she wouldn't let me reason with her! I mean, for Gods' sake! So, I was pissed half of the hour-long, traffic-jammed-cuzza-the-f*cking-Giants-game car ride. Whatever. My mom always pisses me off like that.

However, it was my GRANDMA that kept me pissed most of the time! IT'S MY F*CKING HAIR, LET ME F*CKING DO WHATEVER I WANT TO F*CKING DO WITH IT!!! She called me a punk because of my blue streaks, then said I was ruining my hair when I suggested I bleach either platinum blonde or pure white streaks into my hair when the blue fades. Like I said, it's my hair. Not hers. I realise that she's f*cking conservative, but her ways have interfered with my childhood long enough. WE CAN'T EVEN CELEBRATE F*CKING CHRISTMAS AT HOME BECAUSE MY MOM'S AFRAID IT'LL OFFEND HER!!! D: We have to take it all to the relatives' houses for Christmas parties with people who don't even remember my name, nor are really interested anyway. THEN my parents get into my face about how I'm never social with the relatives. I've learned a long time ago that if I can't learn their language, they're simply going to treat me like they treat my sister's ex-boyfriend (OMG! They broke up! Read more info below)

So, we're finally back. Now, on Wednes, I wanted to go clubbing - really bad. Of course, I'm not even 18, so why would I be let into a club with a bar (The places my sister and her friends always hang out to go clubbing and dancing.) However, there was an all-ages place, but, they weren't dancing that night. Just gypsy music for an outrageous price of $12 per person (We only had $20... ) BUT, my sister's friends' group, The Vowel Movement, was going to perform on Friday! But, my sister was going to Stockton to see Nesto, her boyfriend.

This is where the break up comes in. On thursday, they got into an argument about money... Again... BUT, this time, Nikki had specifically asked Nesto to NOT call her if he was going to talk about the money at work. He didn't listen to her because, as soon as he got to his lunch break, he was grouchy and called her, worried about the money. Oooh, did I mention that they already had a fight early that morning while my sis's friend, Pahee and Krys were about? I don't think I did! They always seem to fight whenever Nikki's with friends, out in public where everyone can see/hear her, with the folks (Oooh, it's horrible when my grandma's in earshot. She's not supposed to know about that kind of stuff. Her ENTIRE side of the family gossips!), while me and her are about to have some fun... You get the picture. It's been annoying, but, while at Borders, they broke up! They seriously broke up! She said she wasn't going to Stockton Friday...

So, today's Friday. Broken up couple, but hopes to go clubbing. Out to dinner with the folks. MAYBE off to the music hall for Beat Boxin' goodness. We get home early. Early enough to make it to the performance! We have all f*cking night, man! Hells yeah!

Nikki, newly single, wants to go clubbing, but calls Pahee to go clubbing just after I mention being home and being bored. Okay, my hopes were my fault. Sue me for wanting to watch her old high school friends beat box, why dontcha? My hands are to weary to draw, my limbs are too sore to do much else. I don't want to sleep. Well, after the call, I got kind of upset. Broken hopes, broken dreams. No party. Too young to drink.

I get it, arguments lead to tears - especially when you're dealing with my sister. Not her, mind you, that was crying. Me...

This, however, happened after I had a few moments to think aobut it. My sister's grown up. She has to deal with taxes, she has the opportunity to drink her worries away, she can do whatever the f*ck she wants, she has the poise and ability to hide whatever she did... No longer are those dreams of going out, tagging some walls like h... ]]> ~Nethray-of-Velec http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/13511450/ http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/13511450/ Wed, 27 Jun 2007 11:39:30 PDT
I'm BLACK, so I MUST carry a gun.

I'm HISPANIC, so I MUST be dirty.

XXXI'm ASIAN, so I MUST be smart. (Pacific Islander, actually... None the less )

XXXI'm NOT LIKE EVERYONE ELSE, so I MUST be a loser.

I'm JEWISH, so I MUST be greedy.

I'm GAY, so I MUST have AIDS.

I'm a LESBIAN, so I MUST have a sex-tape.

I'm ARAB, so I MUST be a terrorist.

XXXI SPEAK MY MIND, so I MUST be a bitch.

XXXI'm OVERWEIGHT, so I MUST have a problem with self control.

I'm RELIGIOUS, so I MUST shove my beliefs down your throat.

I'm an ATHEIST, so I MUST hate the world.

XXXI DON'T HAVE A RELIGION, so I MUST not have morals.

I'm REPUBLICAN, so I MUST not care about poor people.

I'm DEMOCRAT, so I MUST not believe in being responsible.

I'm JAMICAN so I must smoke weed.

XXXI am LIBERAL, so I MUST be gay.

I'm SOUTHERN, so I MUST be white trash.

I TAKE ANTI-DEPRESSANTS, so I MUST be crazy.

I'm a GUY, so I MUST only want to get into your pants.

I'm IRISH, so I MUST have a bad drinking problem.

I'm INDIAN, so I MUST own a convenient store.

I'm NATIVE AMERICAN, so I MUST dance around a fire screaming like a savage.

I'm PREPPY, so I MUST shun those who don't wear Abercrombie & Hollister.

I'm a CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be a stuck up whore.

I'm on a DANCE team, so I must be stupid, stuck up, and a whore.

I wear skirts a lot, so I MUST be a slut.

I'm a PUNK, so I MUST do drugs.

XXXI'm YOUNG, so I MUST be naive.

I'm RICH, so I MUST be a conceited snob.

XXXI WEAR BLACK, so I MUST be a goth.

I'm BLONDE, so I MUST be a stupid ditz.

I'm a WHITE GIRL, so I MUST be a nagging, steal-your-money kind of girlfriend.

I'm CUBAN, so I MUST spend my spare time rolling cigars.

I'm MEXICAN, so I MUST have hopped the border.

I'm NOT A VIRGIN, so I MUST be easy.

I FELL IN LOVE WITH A MARRIED MAN, so I MUST be a home-wrecking whore.

I'm a TEENAGE MOM, so I MUST be an irresponsible slut.

I'm POLISH, so I MUST wear my socks with my sandals.

I'm ITALIAN, so I must have a big peter.

I GOT A CAR FOR MY BIRTHDAY, so I MUST be a spoiled brat.

I'm PRETTY, so I MUST not be a virgin.

I HAVE STRAIGHT A'S, so I MUST have no social life.

XXXI DYE MY HAIR CRAZY COLORS, so I MUST be looking for attention.

XXXI DRESS IN UNUSUAL WAYS so I MUST be looking for attention. (So there are days when I wear all black, or put on a plaid skirt and the whole combat-boot, choker, and black shirt thing just when we're going to go shopping for grocceries. Got a problem?! Huh? HUH?!

XXXI'm INTO THEATER ART, so I MUST be a homosexual.

I'm a VEGETARIAN, so I MUST be a crazy political activist.

I HAVE A BUNCH OF GUY FRIENDS, so I MUST be fucking them all.

I HAVE A BUNCH OF GIRLS WHO ARE FRIENDS, so I MUST be gay.

I HAVE BIG BOOBS, so I MUST be a whore.

I'm COLOMBIAN, so I MUST be a drug dealer.

XXXI WEAR WHAT I WANT, so I MUST be a poser.

I'm RUSSIAN, so I MUST be cool.

I'm GERMAN, so I MUST be a Nazi.

XXXI hang out with GAYS, so I MUST be GAY TOO

I'm BRAZILIAN, so I MUST have a BIG BUTT.

I'm PUERTO RICAN, so I MUST look good and be conceited.

I'm SALVADORIAN, so I MUST be in MS 13.

I'm POLISH, so I MUST be greedy.

I'm HAWAIIAN, so I MUST be lazy.

I'm a STONER, so I MUST be going in the wrong direction.

XXXI'm a VIRGIN, so I MUST be a prude.

XXXI'm a FEMALE GAMER, so I MUST be ugly or crazy.

I'm BLACK, so I MUST love watermelon and fried chicken.

I'm BI, so I MUST think every person I see is hot.

I'm ASIAN, so I MUST have a small penis.

I'm a GUY CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be gay.

I'm SKINNY, so I MUST be anorexic.

I'm PREP, so I MUST be rich.

I dont like the SUN so I MUST be albino.

XXXI have a lot of FRIENDS, so I MUST love to drink and party.

I wear tight PANTS and I'm a guy, so I MUST be emo.

I couldn't hurt a FLY, So I MUST be a pussy.

XXXI support GAY RIGHTS, so I MUST fit in with everyone.

I hang out with teenaged drinkers and smokers, so I MUST smoke and drink too.

Im... ]]> ~Nethray-of-Velec http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/13490307/ http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/13490307/ Mon, 25 Jun 2007 20:11:03 PDT
So, the weather up until a while ago has been horrible for giving poor Fri-Fwi a bath, and once the weather was okay we had forgotten about the bath! So, we cut her claws around... Early last month, late the month before (Bad with months right now! )... So, her claws HAVE grown. OUCH, dude!

So, in the end, my entire back got scratched up (Especially my upper right side! It hurts to type!), my PJs (T'was too lazy to change into either a dirty shirt or a sleeveless shirt... Or change at all...) got wet, and, of course, I had to deal with one angry kitty.

All's better now, though. I got nagged by both of my parents on why I shouldn't carry a cat (Specially one with claws)... AT THE SAME TIME -_-... Nikki's gone to a party and won't be back 'till Wednesday, Gram's still the same inquisitive snoop trying to lull me into a false sense of security, and, of course, I'm still on my "musical period" (A time in which I can not listen to a song for too long for too many songs are stuck in my head. However, I've narrowed down what I need to listen to to some of the songs from Avenue Q, old Linkin Park songs, I Miss You by blink 182, and I Hate (Everything about You) by Three Days Grace. If not the two specific songs, aside from a few Linkin Park songs, I CAN NOT listen to love songs... Alas. My soul knows nothing but, though... D: )

]]> ~Nethray-of-Velec http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/13475431/ http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/13475431/ Sun, 24 Jun 2007 18:07:57 PDT
I got blue streaks! WHEE!

Yeah, that's all, really. Yesterday was actually kinda crappy, but I had no time to post about it. Long story short about yesterday: I got into a fight with my mom and sister and there was an endless shoe nightmare.

Elaine, my friend who moved to the Philipenes, called, also, and I began to wonder about how much we've both changed since she moved in the middle of sixth grade. Quotes like "What's brain freeze?" came to mind and I began to realize how much things have changed. She still seems the same. Not exactly the brightest light bulb, still with the same voice that I remembered... Nothing has seemed to have changed with her except that she's learned chatspeak (Oh, the chatspeak *twitch*)

We used to be the best of friends. Now, she's nearly a world away with her own friends and I have mine as well. I'm the nerdy emo kid too bored with the current song to care while she's the cheery, wannabe goth, trying to tolerate the colors black and red when, really, you know deep down she'll never abandon pink. She used to be the one that, with another girl from our class so long ago, would get answers to Social Studies homework - despite whether or not it made sense - from me. She was the too honest one, the one uncomprehending of the social ladder.

She was my friend... And I miss her dearly. (Okay, friends like and and are pretty awesome friends as well... I just miss my E.e, the one who didn't think always hugging was bad... I'd never been fake-beaten up, had my hand nearly torn off from my wrist, or been flinched at before her...)

The sorrow evens out the happiness...

]]> ~Nethray-of-Velec http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/13445365/ http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/13445365/ Fri, 22 Jun 2007 10:34:00 PDT
Well, I'm going to keep myself busy between 2PM today until the roadtrip through Oregon. I'm thinking of (Finally) actually working on Velec as well as Spectral. I worked on some of the major crew members of Captain Nyl's ship The White Obsidian. I've also worked on my characters' outfits (As you have seen with Issej, if anyone has seen her aside from ). I've also been working on two new crew members (For those of you who have seen my old Velec, though I never had time to introduce them all, there were already four crew members not including Captain Nyl: Elyk, Petez, Seisej, and Tunmar). Their names, currently, are Jaust and Siales. Whee! I can't wait to finally get Velec started!

]]> ~Nethray-of-Velec http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/13387586/ http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/13387586/ Sun, 17 Jun 2007 23:50:49 PDT
Tomorrow marks the week-long Art camp that my parents signed me up for. Ah... TWO HOURS of nothing but learning how to draw! I'm uber excited!... But, alas, I have to wake up early so as to wake up my sister (Who will be driving me) early. It's like everything good has to have some flaw to bring down some of it...

Anyway, I'm also happy because my parentshave made a decision about summer vacation. Yes, we ARE going somewhere this summer! WHOOT! We're road tripping to Oregon where we'll be hanging out town-to-town; day-by-day! It'll be sometime late Julyand will be... Wow... I was so excited, I didn't catch how long it would be! But, yeah... I'm going to use that time to be electronics free (Aside from music and the occasional phone calls... Really, now... Who'd call me?).

I plan to relish every moment from this minute to 11:59 P.M. the night before I have to begin attending high school (Can't check date... Too lazy)!

]]> ~Nethray-of-Velec http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/13385124/ http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/13385124/ Sun, 17 Jun 2007 19:30:59 PDT
Last night,I slept over at 's mom's apartment. For a while, it was just some watching movies, keeping her younger siblings in control, and getting the munchies. We watched Little Miss Sunshine, RENT, and Kill Bill. By the time we werehalf way through Kill Bill, both of her siblings were knocked out and her mom was getting ready to go out.

So, when her mom left, we started to watch Invader Zim. Oh, the memories it brought back.We got into a conversation about the old class and, though I disliked school in general, I began to realize how much I'd seriously miss the class. It was like a second family, thoughI was not close with everyone. It was this loving class that, though it had its small grudges, cliques, and more, seemed like the best class I had ever had the honor of being a part of (I moved about from different schools in the Dioscese).

I wasn't friends with everyone, of course, but I DID have friends. There were the ones who knew my crushes, there were the ones who tried to guess. There were the ones who, though I told them, freaked out when they asked me again. Then, there were the ones who just didn't give a sh*t. Then there were the friends who simply are there - though I never really hung out with them much. I'll miss them, but I also hope for the best for the 7th graders, though now they're 8th graders. Though I feel miserable about the current times, knowing what I know now, I'm glad there's still more time for tomorrow and the next day, and the next!

]]> ~Nethray-of-Velec http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/13342255/ http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/13342255/ Thu, 14 Jun 2007 12:00:20 PDT
Well, it all started with a late night of inability to sleep last night. OF COURSE, I had an orthodondics appointment EARLY in the morning (Whee! I'm getting braces! ) and so my mom took me.

The drive there wasn't bad at all. Kinda hot due to summer heat, but other than that, it was okay... I was hoping the ride back would be the same.

The radio wa blaring some music, being that I couldn't listen to my iPod (My mom has this weird idea I'm trying to ignore her .Oh, contrare. I'm trying to ignore the rest of the world with blasting music!)

Trying to make conversation with me, the topic of "camp" and "vacation" came up. Okay, I'll admit. My mom does a lot. She works in an office building ruled by a jerk-off boss. To top that off, she cooks, cleans, and makes sure there's food on the tablefor my dad when he gets home from work. She does a lot ofhouse-work and it would be wrong to ask her to help out with setting up a camp. We're not going on any "Cruise and Plane" vacation this year to save up to go... I dunno... I forgot if it was a flight to the Philipines or on a cruise to the Bahamas. But camping, definately, was out... D:

We settled at that.

THEN the topic of where I'd be going after summer-art camp (Technically, two hours of drawing every day for one week in a class in San Fransisco... This seems to be the closest I'll be to a camp...) Good GAWD! It'slike she aims to talk about things when I'm already pissed (I was pretty damned pissed around the time camp was definately crossed out from the "To Do" list...) and makessure Isay something worth grounding me! I had nothing OF INTEREST in mind (That INCLUDES cleaning my room, thank you...) and that was what I told my mom. I was mad, yes, but I supressing it onlyto show a slightly depressed tone. GOOD LORD DOES SHE FIND EVERYTHING AS ATTITUDE?!

Finally, we got home. She messes up with something on the car while getting out and blames me! I didn't even notice the god-damned thing UNTIL she told me about it! How am I being f*cking lazy?!

So, we go into the house, ballled up rage and all, and she begins to nag at me about being on the computer too much when there is a lot of things "of interest" to do. Yeah... Who's interest? Her interest? Then she goes onto the whole "I know what it's like to be you" trip, taking things from her childhood and trying to compare her to me. Hate this... DON'T MAKE ME GO BAT-SH*T! IT'S STILL 12PM!

]]> ~Nethray-of-Velec http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/13333351/ http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/13333351/ Wed, 13 Jun 2007 18:18:11 PDT
Ugh... I shouldn't expect much from Neopets.ofcourse, but it seems with summer coming back and my need to role play coming with it, I have found no consolementwith the fact that all the good RPers seem to only be up from dusk-dawn... Everyone else is either decent, but a jerk, horrible, but nice, or horrible AND a jerk. Okay, there are some nice ones who are semi-Literate. I'm doing a Fantasy RP with several nice, sortadecent ones, in fact, but... UGH! Okay, I ran into a super intolerable jerk-off. Yes, yes. I know.Love thy neighbor.Do unto othes what youwouldwant done unto yourself, but this guy was just a concentration of pure jack-assery!

He acted as if he were the king of kings; ignoring the simple rule of waiting for me to finish posting everything. But he was the only one to come. He was the only one to dare hear my plea for help in such a boring afternoon...

Well, the RP didn't get far with this butt-wipe. I admitted I was a slow typer and that, with my stupid spacebar acting up, I wasn't going to meet his same speed of rather indecent disregard to other people's posts and rules... Alas,I told him kindly I wasn't a fast typer. He said I wasn'tagood enough role player for him and left.

Now, I'm stuck RPing with nice people... With perfects... Good lord why?! The fates are not very nice. At least the jerk-off didn't have aperfect, but these guys are like... Oh... I hate this... The two that didn't have perfects had to log off... And, I'm still waiting on another person... I'm bored... TT_TT

]]> ~Nethray-of-Velec http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/13292229/ http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/13292229/ Sun, 10 Jun 2007 15:45:59 PDT
Okay, yeah. For those of you haven't noticed, I haven't been on dA for a while. Why? Mind you own business!

Okay, well... Yeah... New artses and stuff... Redoing Velec... Summer vacation... Graduated 8th grade... Some pretty basic new stuff youd really expect from - GRADUATED EIGHTH GRADE?! Wheeehooo!

Okay, I'm done with that... That was stupid...

]]> ~Nethray-of-Velec http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/12697237/ http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/12697237/ Sun, 22 Apr 2007 20:14:41 PDT
Okay, so yesterday, me, my sister Nikki, and my friend went to A.P.E. 2007 and it freaking rocked! My sister rocks for taking us! So, she bought us a coupla' comics and I had lots of fun. Sadly, school starts tomorrow and nothing helps the fact that I still have to work on a report due on the 15th of May. Ah well. Weekends are only fun while they last...

]]> ~Nethray-of-Velec http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/12648423/ http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/12648423/ Wed, 18 Apr 2007 21:40:00 PDT
]]> ~Nethray-of-Velec http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/12580407/ http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/12580407/ Fri, 13 Apr 2007 12:41:01 PDT I hate it...

]]> ~Nethray-of-Velec http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/12552653/ http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/12552653/ Wed, 11 Apr 2007 11:35:54 PDT something... I mean just about anything. Old drawings (my memories from years before), perfectly good pencils that I left in MY OWN BACKPACK, crayons, stories that my friends and I pass around on printer paper for the simple use of reading, and so many other things. I'm fed up with it! Every moment of my own spring break, she has pestered me to clean up something that contains any of that. Even the stuff in MY PERSONAL DRAWERS (That are never to see the light of day again. I mean, I know I should throw them away if they're never to see the light again, but they still contain memories. Fowl memories, yes, but memories none the less.)

I mean, yes, they cause a slight mess, but at least just say "Put them away". Even worse, when I actually did sort through one of my piles of drawings, she told me to do it AGAIN! What the fuck!? I hate this. I want to move out. Damn me being a god damned minor...

No bludgeon was really used, though....

]]> ~Nethray-of-Velec http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/12529479/ http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/12529479/ Mon, 09 Apr 2007 18:19:09 PDT
1.- If I were a fruit I'd be… Mango
2.- If I were a colour I'd be… Dark Blue
3.- If I were an animal I'd be… Whale
4.- If I were a domestic appliance I'd be… Computer
5.- If I were a book I'd be… Harry Potter and the Sorcere's Stone
6.- If I were a clothing item I'd be… Fishnet gloves
7.- If I were a jewel I'd be… Amethyst
8.- If I were an object I'd be… A pencil
9.- If I were a car I'd be… A Toyota 4Runner
10.- If I were an element I'd be… Water
11.- If I were a tree I'd be… Weeping Willow
12.- If I were a drink I'd be… Mango Juice
13.- If I were an ice cream flavour I'd be… Strawberry
14.- If I were a person I'd be… Myself
15.- If I were a planet I'd be… Mars
16.- If I were an insect I'd be… Termite
17.- If I were public transport I'd be… The BART
18.- If I were a song I'd be… Coin Operated Boy
19.- If I were a movie I'd be... The Nightmare Before Christmas
20.- If I were a season I'd be… Fall
21.- If I were a flower I'd be... Dandelion (Technically, it's a weed)
22.- If I were a job I'd be… Programmer
23.- If I were a cartoon I'd be… Invader Zim
24.- If I were a place I'd be… Planet Irk
25.- If I were a gift I'd be… Roses
26.- If I were a memory I'd be... That moment the morning after you went out for a party with friends and you wake up with some reeeeeeally random person (())
27.- If I were a city I'd be... El Cerrito, California
28.- If I were a sense I'd be… Touch
29.- If I were a game I'd be… Sims Bustin' Out
30.- If I were a candy I'd be… Chocolate Burdows from Sees
31.- If I were a time of the day I'd be… Midnight
32.- If I were an invention I'd be... Coca Cola
33.- If I were a body part I'd be… The head
34.- If I were a country I'd be… Canada
35.- If I were a flavor I'd be… Rotten Mangos (Super sweet with the hint of citrus overload)
36.- If I were a sport I'd be… Volleyball
37.- If I were a smell I'd be… The smell of rotting flesh in a fresh pine forest.
38.- If I were a subject I'd be... Art
39.- If I were a flag I'd be… Peace Sign flag
40.- If I were a building I'd be… Either a cozy little home or office building
41.- If I were a month I'd be… November
42.- If I were a perfume I'd be… Cotton Candy
43.- If I were a gummy candy I'd be… Gummi Bears
45.- If I were a toy I'd be… *inserts a phrase not even my mom knows*
46.- If I were a textile I'd be… Suede
47.- If I were a shape I'd be… A Line
48.- If I were a answer I'd be… "Yes, but I wouldn't if I were you..."
49.- If I were a common liquorice I'd be… None
50.- If I were a word I'd be… BLAM!

]]> ~Nethray-of-Velec http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/12449877/ http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/12449877/ Tue, 03 Apr 2007 21:03:42 PDT
Well, let me tell my tale... It was friday night (My apologies for the lateness... Party-hangovers... No, I did not drink...) and there was a dance. Oh, yes. What a fun dance. Music loud and room so packed on one side, you could basically have your own party on the other side! Ah, yes. A stupid, but fun, party hosted by my old school where horrible memories had once flooded my once perfectly sane skull. Oh... That was fun. Hardly three days left before the party was when we first informed. A shin-dig of very miniscule proportions and we were invited! Oh, that school. No guys in T-shits, however, and I was accustomed to that. Collared shirts to a party? You bet your ass! Ah, only the rules of the strict, strict priests who often smelled of alchohol as they passed through the hallowed halls. Oh, yes. Strictness with flaws. So many flaws. So many mind-numbing, desease-filled flaws.
Oh, yes... Um... I'm losing focus...

Anyway, the party went on great... I believe the song, however, where words of tormented dislike from my own sanctuary of school-mates was a song called Walking Out... Or something to that nature. Ah, how that dance is stupid. Not to diss anyone that loves to dance to that song. I mean, it is a nice song. I just didn't like the fact that they had people only dance a certain way. What has the world come to where a girl wanting to have fun can't have her fun of improvisation without being made fun of by a coupl'a ass-wipes? To make matters worse, I asked the DJ to play some electronica music. Oh, how fun it was! Trying to play out my own older sister's raver days in the form of my own generation. No acid, however... *sigh* Like I need it, so say friends... After all, ecstacy driven dreams and acid based days? You bet your ass I must be drugged out! Sadly, I'm not... Wird thing is, the worst I've ever taken was Nyquil...

Anyway, some bitch began complaining. Oh, and I'm up for some critisism. I after all, have no real tast for rap and hip hop. But I tolerate it. No... This was the kind that I was certain that was intended for the simple try at cutting down the happiness of any and all who really thought electronica enjoyable. Yes, I agree... The song was wordless and the only thing close to a human voice was a simple hysterical laugh here and there. But it was a nice song. Worst of all, she was making fun of it in the worst possible form. She had said her ears were burning; bleeding...

*sigh* Sincerely, I am at woe of those sorrowful events. Even worse, I was not able to see an old friend I wanted to see at the dance, Only the same people who tormented me. I n=jknow they didn't mean it, but they dragged me into their crowd. My own classmates even used that moment as a moment to "bridge" their two "dance blobs" together. Honestly, I hate crowds... I won't do well in the middle of a dance circle, which sucks because they always drag me into it.

Well, whatever... The dance was okay other than that... Stupid classmate... intended her that way... Whatever...

]]> ~Nethray-of-Velec http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/12316857/ http://Nethray-of-Velec.deviantart.com/journal/12316857/ Sun, 25 Mar 2007 00:03:00 PDT
]]> ~Nethray-of-Velec