http://search.deviantart.com/?q=by:Nynae&section=today deviantART RSS for by:Nynae en-us Copyright 2009, deviantART.com Tue, 22 Dec 2009 07:56:48 PST deviantART.com http://blogs.law.harvard.edu/tech/rss http://s.deviantart.com/minish/widgets/apple-touch-icon-precomposed.png http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/18155298/ http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/18155298/ Sat, 03 May 2008 20:42:47 PDT
I've been feeling a little less funky in the past few days than I have in perhaps the past few years. I've been a little more creative and wrote, finally, my spring poem. I am still unhappy with winter, but winter was never my favorite anyway.

I would like any critiques you have to offer!

On another note, I graduate in... two weeks today. Who is happy about this? ME!

]]> ~Nynae http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/17439869/ http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/17439869/ Fri, 21 Mar 2008 09:37:03 PDT
I know fully and well that there are a ton of journals and deviations and such that I have yet to respond to. I will get to them, AFTER I get back from Spring Break. WOOOO NO COMPUTER!

]]> ~Nynae http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/16948947/ http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/16948947/ Mon, 18 Feb 2008 15:56:00 PST
Have you talked to your mother lately?

]]> ~Nynae http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/16880744/ http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/16880744/ Thu, 14 Feb 2008 12:23:23 PST
[link]

That's for you! No... no I really didn't take the picture... or caption it... but I have love for you! <3 Love for everyone!

]]> ~Nynae http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/16612281/ http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/16612281/ Mon, 28 Jan 2008 12:30:17 PST
Have you heard of Melinda Mae,
Who ate a monstrous whale?
She thought she could,
She said she would,
So she started in right at the tail.

And everyone said, "You're much too small,"
But that didn't bother Melinda at all.
She took little bites and she chewed very slow,
Just like a good girl should...

...And in eighty-nine years she ate that whale
Because she said she would!



This one is by Shel Silverstein and one that I feel applies very much to my life at the moment. I will get there.

For my going away dinner, we went to the Pancake Parlour (endemic to Australia, I believe). Very yummy pancakes and good times playing with over-sized chess pieces.

As we were leaving, we stopped by Borders, as our troup of bibliophiles is wont to do. Mary, ma petite soeur, asked me to help her choose a book and I suggested Shel Silverstein's "Where the Sidewalk Ends." Much to my unending delight, she took it home and gobbled up the pages one by one.

Shel Silverstein is one of my favourite poets of all time. My California Papa (I have a lot of grandfathers and sometimes they get strange names) gifted me my first book of Silverstein poetry, for my birthday in 1992. Well that's 16 years ago (yesterday) and I was 7 and loved every bit of it, but love it more now. I feel that his work is very poignant to readers of all ages, and going over his work again at my age (23, I got older again) I feel that I am discovering new things to love about his poems. Listening to Mary read them almost brought me to tears, the good kind that remind me of my dreams, my hopes... and most importantly, my loves.

I hope you've read a Shel Silverstein in your life, or maybe another good poem. We all need at least one to hold onto. And if you haven't, well let me offer you this:

INVITATION

If you are a dreamer, come in,
If you are a dreamer, a wisher, a liar,
A hope-er, a pray-er, a magic bean buyer...
If you're a pretender, come sit by my fire
For we have some flax-golden tales to spin.
Come in!
Come in!

~ Shel Silverstein

(You know, there really needs to be a nostalgic mood option.)

]]> ~Nynae http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/16552920/ http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/16552920/ Thu, 24 Jan 2008 14:50:54 PST
Strangely, I don't mind so much. I've missed winter. It's such a bitter, absolute cold, it feels almost purifying. I think I'll need to redo my old winter poem. I wasn't particularly happy with it, anyway.

All of the essentials for my last semester are all moved into my dorm room. My new room-mate seems alright. I think we're about as different as two people who both study science can possibly be. She's a sorority girl, there are pictures of male celebs plastered on her wall, fashion magazines on her bookshelves, and two tons of clothing in her closet and under her bed. And posters for Mitch Romney. I've just applied for a job tele-fundraising for Barak Obama. It should be okay, though, we don't have to have much in common to make it work well and I'm determined to be cheerful and friendly and helpful.

The last biology class I need to take to fulfill my degree is shaping up to be quite interesting. It's listed on the schedule of courses as Phylogeny of the Animal Kingdom, but the professor explained that it was really meant to be Evolution of the Animal Kingdom. We'll be studying evolutionary history, discovering how we think certain adaptations came to be and when, why, all of that. Should be good.

I'm also taking a music for non-majors class, Masterpieces of Western Music. As enjoyable as I think it may be in the end, the textbook for the class was $60 and the group of CDs... $90. Good grief, right? Music is precious and all that, but I'm going to see about finding the music elsewhere.

Yesterday seemed to be the day for walking into people I haven't seen forever. I saw my ex, his friend from marching band that I used to live close to and haven't seen in years, and finally someone I used to know from the high school speech and debate team. I haven't seen him in five years. He went somewhere else for undergrad and is here now for law school.

Sorry for the extra long update but I'm in a chatty and light-hearted mood. Hugs and kisses to all!

]]> ~Nynae http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/16382703/ http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/16382703/ Sun, 13 Jan 2008 05:38:22 PST
I had thought about telling you all what I have gained from this year off, but I'm tired and don't much feel like it. I am content to say that I have grown, that it was good for me, and that I am eager to tie up some loose ends.

]]> ~Nynae http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/15516207/ http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/15516207/ Thu, 15 Nov 2007 04:49:22 PST
The interesting thing is... you'll very rarely find someone who will tell you that they don't really care for music at all. Even if you don't go out of your way to appreciate, buy every album a band has ever produced, ruin your eardrums at huge concerts, you will still appreciate a nice, fast dance tune while you're in the gym or perhaps a little Enya while you're getting a pedicure.

I was on the tram the other day and an older man chose to sit next to me. It was a nice Sunday, beautiful weather, so people were out in full force. At one stop, a large group of varrying ethnicities (Mediterranean, Middle-Eastern, Asian) boarded the tram and I heard him mutter under his breath "f------ wogs all over the place." I have the feeling that I'm pretty naive about some things, because it shocked me to rediscover that racism is alive and well all over the world.

I wondered if I should say anything, because it's risky, it could enflame things, make the worse. As things stood, it was unlikely that anyone but myself had heard him and I didn't want to alert the individuals who the comment was aimed at. What would I say, anyway? And so I sat there, on this tram, on a beautiful Sunday and I was miserable because the man next to me was so full of this hate.

What should I say? Put a little love in your heart? Yes. Think of your fellow man, lend him a helping hand... put a little love in your heart! You see it's getting late, oh please don't hesitate! Put a little love in your heart!

And without really intending to, I began singing the song quietly in my head. I responded in such a strong and positive way, I really couldn't help but smile. Because it was indeed a beautiful Sunday in spring and I had love in my heart.

When I arrived at my destination, I told my story to the man I was meeting, of course after giving him a great big happy hug with a broad smile on my face. He told me a similar one, how he was singing outloud at one of his regular spots, quite by accident, and the lady behind the counter commented that he must be happy; he was singing. He said it was just the opposite, he was happy because he was singing.

What is it about music that we respond to so strongly? Our human brains enjoy pattern recognition, certainly, and there is lots of that in song, but it can't be just that. Maybe we associate them with particularly bright and happy moments in our life. I don't know, and while I probably should research the topic in scientific journals, I don't really want to right now.

My point is, music can make light work out of drudgery in the kitchen. It can recall the spirit of the holidays and bring generations of family together around the same trusty piano. And really, above everything, that I feel my anecdotes and musings are especially important to share with those who still read my journal

]]> ~Nynae http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/15306512/ http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/15306512/ Wed, 31 Oct 2007 18:12:53 PDT
Yes, they have. Some religious extremists have invaded the privacy of families and those close to individuals who have died giving their lives for their country. I couldn't believe it when I heard. Who would violate such a day and add to the burden of grief striken families? Well, the Westboro Baptist Church for one.

Apparently they believe that God is punishing soldiers in Iraq and Afghanistan because of the government's stance on homosexuality. I'm not entirely sure what their deal is, because Iraq is most certainly George Bush's war and George Bush is nothing if not against gay marriage. Maybe God's unhappy because we don't burn LGBT individuals at the stake. Whoooo knows?! I'm not sure they do but I'm outraged, shocked, angry beyond belief that anyone would ever protest at a funeral.

I could go on and on about how I disagree with them, but that isn't really even the point. Believe whatever you like and certainly tell the world your beliefs, it's your right to do so, but don't violate a grieving family's privacy that way.

Apparently I am not the only individual who feels this way. [link]

]]> ~Nynae http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/15047871/ http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/15047871/ Sat, 13 Oct 2007 18:12:00 PDT
Of course he slobbers, and he did mark at least three trees while we were in the park, but I think I can forgive him anything. He is a Great Dane after all.

]]> ~Nynae http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/14710326/ http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/14710326/ Thu, 20 Sep 2007 04:48:48 PDT
1. What is your character's name?
Nynae Aystheart-Eruu'Yul

2. What is your character's name in another language?
She knows some Lamath Tsol'aa, like doma (meaning brother), but she uses it only sparringly.

3. How old is he/she?
89

4. What is your character's race/species?
Tsol'aa, reserved humanoids of the forest. Very intelligent and supposedly more cautious than humans.

5. Do they have a crush?
Not really, she's married and haunted by the ghosts of old loves, but I'd never call them crushes.

6. Do they have many friends?
Yes, though lately she's been really busy and has isolated herself a bit.

7. What planet is your character from?
Sapience. Which is actually a continent.

8. Does your character like to eat?
No, she doesn't need to anymore and fails to see the point.

9. What's his/her favorite food?
If she did eat, she'd probably say the Tsol'aan waybread, because it lasts long. It's practical.

10. What's his/her favorite drink?
Lately she's taken to drinking vodka in the form of a Werewolf's Bite. It helps take the edge off her pain.

11. Is your character annoying?
I'm sure that she is.

13. Is your character loved?
She is, but that doesn't keep them from leaving her.

14. Is your character hated?
Oh yeah.

15. Is she/he emo/goth?
No.

16. Is she/he straight, bisexual, or gay?
She greatly prefers men but there are women with whom she feels so emotionally intimate with that physical intimacy has followed. That does not mean, however, that I had mudsex.

17. Is she/he considered "normal"?
She doesn't care enough to notice.

18. Name 3 hobbies:
Hunting, fishing (though she hasn't had time in awhile), drinking

19. Does your character have any irrational fears?
Being left, though it's not really irrational.

20. Is your character attractive?
In her own way, though she has a much harder beauty about her than she used to. She used the be very soft and vuluptous.

21. How does your character handle emotions?
It depend on what it is. She's only told a few lately why she's been drinking. She can sometimes be quick to flare up and lashes out or makes inflammatory comments rather than remaining patient, like her office often requires of her. She recognizes that as a problem, though, and she's working on it.

22. Does your character have other forms?
Nope.

23. Does your character overreact?
Yes.

24. Is your character a criminal?
No.

25. Does your character go to school?
No, but she is a scholar and will try to engage the students in her House in philosophical discussion on the elements.

26. What's his/her IQ?
She's quite intelligent.

27. Does your character have a disease/curse?
She's been pregnant for probably 3 IC years. Some might call that a curse.

28. Is your character dead?
No.

29. Does your character have a family?
Yes. She and her mother are quite distant, but she feels very close to her father. Her only active child is Silvos, whome she adores and is very proud of. The rest of her children are mostly asleep and she misses (most of) them.

30. Has he/she encountered any tragic times in life?
Finding out that her son plagarized during his studies, being abandoned by every single man she's ever loved, save for one, including once when she was left at the altar. Her daughter joining Shallam, holocausting in a garden, verbally insulting and attacking her father because of his class.

31. What's the best time in your character's life?
Being Patroned by Lord Lupus was a good one. She was so excited and surprised and shocked that she couldn't speak. The birth of her children. I roleplayed the birth of her eldest, Eldis, who has since disappeared to Ulangi.

32. If you could name one friend, which would you relate to your character?
I'm not quite sure I understand this question, but the answer is probably Sahirah or Kez.

33. Is your character single?
No.

34. Has he/she developed any relationships?
Yes,

35. Does he/she have an element?
Air, or Aeris which is the fancy word that Sylvans use to refer to air.

36. Do you roleplay your character?
Yes.

37. Do you write about your character?
Nope.

38. Does your character have a bad temper at times?
Yes, yes she does. Surly old shewolf.

39. Does your... ]]> ~Nynae http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/14035794/ http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/14035794/ Sun, 05 Aug 2007 22:31:07 PDT
I won't go too terribly into it, but I was very sniffly at bits and feel very affectionate towards a lot of characters.

Anyway, question for you. Who is your favourite Hogwarts professor?

Mine is McGonagal, the fiesty lady!

]]> ~Nynae http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/13931380/ http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/13931380/ Sun, 29 Jul 2007 18:38:03 PDT
I think what makes it most real, most heartbreaking to me, is that she was Mary's age. I can't imagine losing my little sister, all her love and her sweetness, her innocent frankness, her amazingly astute observations, everything. And so today's post is one of thanks. We are so lucky to have the people we love with us, and I hope that you have yours for years to come, that you make the most of what you have together, that your love only grows stronger because it is all too precious to waste.

]]> ~Nynae http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/13523820/ http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/13523820/ Thu, 28 Jun 2007 10:16:24 PDT
Firstly, as I was leaving, the immigration officer informed me that they would let me leave the country... but not return. A part of the picture on my passport had flaked off. A small part, over my shoulder. So... I need to get a passport in less than three weeks. The wait line is 6 months... we have to pay someone to expedite it. Woohoo and such. I've been in St. Louis all week trying to figure that one out.

In other news, I got contacts. It took me forever to figure out how to get them in past my blink reflex and every morning when I wrestle them in, I feel a small sense of immense victory.

I also finished the second book in Martin's Song of Fire and Ice series. Holy cow but he kills off a lot of people. I'll miss Davos... but at least he made it all the way through the book.

]]> ~Nynae http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/13390338/ http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/13390338/ Mon, 18 Jun 2007 06:55:54 PDT
1) That is just entirely too disgusting to eat!

2) I'm sorry, my schedule's a bit full but I'll pencil you in for a 3pm game of catch.

3) Oh yuck! I'm so filty and smelly that I just can't stand it!

4) No thank you. I'm not hungry just now.

5) Oh. A bird. I suppose I'll chase it later.

6) Oh I wish you'd stop petting! You're messing up my fur.

7) You were gone? I hadn't noticed.

8) I can never get to sleep. I just lay in bed thinking all night.

9) I'm not really in the meed to have my tummy rubbed.

10) We have company? I must have missed the door bell. *yawn*

Bless dogs. As I'm writing this, Molly is sitting at my feet. She's dreaming. I can tell because her tongue is making as though she were licking something that isn't there. The orally-fixated dog will lick your hand for hours if you let her. Oh but I love her, and need to post pictures of her.

What would your dog probably never say?

]]> ~Nynae http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/12573240/ http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/12573240/ Thu, 12 Apr 2007 21:07:37 PDT
I'm getting close to the end of "Game of Thrones." I'm completely on edge because it looks like the bad guys are winning. Whenever I try to explain the plot to anyone, it always sounds like a soap opera but it's not. Anyway, I'm rooting for the Starks and perhaps just a bit for Dany.

Yesterday and the day before I hooked up with Solymr and Sahirah from Achaea. We went and played pool, bowled and generally had a good dorky time at the arcade. Yesterday we went to see Meet the Robinsons. I think Sahirah posted pictures of us on the forums. Go check it out if you like!

Umm... what else? I feel like strangling anyone and everone who overharvests, specially those who complain about it afterwards and I'm REALLY tired of trying to defend Oakstone to those who don't know how it operates. Ummmmmmmers... I'm hungry for lunch. And... my pecs hurt because I think I overextended the benchpressing. Oh and the foot that was once broken is now really bugging me. If it doesn't get better I might go to the doctor I think perhaps kicking the football with Johnny was what did it.

Can someone explain being a teenage boy to me? It's utterly beyond me.

OH! That's right. I forgot to mention the coolest part of my trip to Marysville. We saw a koala in the wild. He crossed our path as we were walking back from the falls and we climbed up a tree, pausing at parts to watch us and perhaps pose for some photos. It was so awesome.

]]> ~Nynae http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/12292478/ http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/12292478/ Fri, 23 Mar 2007 04:42:56 PDT
In other news, I had been feeling odd lately, like a cross-threaded bottle cap and wondering why. I think I have my answer.

Okay, Midol and bed for me. Nighties! Much wubs.

]]> ~Nynae http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/12265579/ http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/12265579/ Tue, 20 Mar 2007 23:05:06 PDT
fresh cut grass
ginger
the beach
campfires
railroad ties
summer nights
rain
freshly turned earth
honey
fresh laundry
baby powder
lavendar
old books
coffee
approaching storms
the cold
orange and cloves
soy sauce

What does your nose like to sniff?

]]> ~Nynae http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/12186345/ http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/12186345/ Wed, 14 Mar 2007 19:57:38 PDT
Seriously, Johnny's softball team can't have practice because of the stupid Grand Prix. What's so grand about it really? People go and spend too much money on tickets, sit in the sun and get sunburnt, inhale exhaust fumes, pollute my neighborhood with useless noise from the PA or the constant bzzzzzzz bzzzzz of stupid cars, get drunk, park in our parking spots (we seriously have to get a parking pass to get into our neighborhood now, because the race watchers like to park wherever they please) and the stupid thing doesn't even make money. Seriously. It's stupid.

On the up side, I went to get clothing patterns yesterday. We're going fabric shopping tomorrow. I'm really excited! You would be too. Oh and umm... we got really snifty beads to make jewellery with. I'll show you the finished products if you ask nicely! It'll help if you can manage to get the Grand Prix out of my park as well. STUPID CARS!

]]> ~Nynae http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/12088365/ http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/12088365/ Wed, 07 Mar 2007 00:34:00 PST A song of peace for lands afar and mine.
This is my home, the country where my heart is.
Here lie my dreams, my hope, my holy shrine.
This is my song, oh God of all the people,
A song of peace of lands afar and mine.

My countries skies are bluer than the oceans,
and sunlight beams on lands afar and mine.
But other skies have sunlight too and clover
and other hearts beat strong and true as mine.
This is my song, oh God of all the people,
A song of peace of lands afar and mine."

Katharina von Schtegel
Tr. by Jane L. Brothwick

I remember this song from ages ago, when I was but a little thing in PSR. Last night was the first night I've heard it in a long long while. My grandmother is director of a local singing group (I love my grammy) and they had rehersal here. I sang with them, soprano if you were wondering. We sang "When Irish Eyes are Smiling" and "My Wild Irish Rose" they're practicing for St. Patty's day.

Some songs just resonate within. This one brought back memories of me as a young girl, during mass, so full of hope and love and wonder. My eyes stung with tears and the part of me that wants always to be rational, reasonable, it balked. It rebels still and I wonder if I should let it.

My flight leaves tomorrow at 8pm. My bags are packed. I'm saying my goodbyes. I'm nervous and anxious and hopeful and ... handing my apartment keys to Andrew was a lot harder than I anticipated. But when I think about going back to him, a part of me balks as well. It's not the same part. It is probably the saner part. I'm still mourning the three years I spent with him. I was closer to him than I most if not all of my other friends and I miss that... I miss the emotional intimacy. That is no reason to get married, not when everything else isn't as it should be.

]]> ~Nynae http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/11953806/ http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/11953806/ Sat, 24 Feb 2007 21:47:08 PST
And I have to be one of the very few women who seriously hate clothes shopping. *STABSTAB EYEGOUGE*

]]> ~Nynae http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/11815641/ http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/11815641/ Wed, 14 Feb 2007 16:52:18 PST
Umm... moving to another continent is a pain in the ass. Health forms, visa forms, forms that prove I can support myself while in the country, forms that prove I haven't been convicted of crimes and some such, forms that prove I can handle the stress of moving to another continent and not totally break into a bajillion pieces. WELL IF I DIDN'T HAVE SO MUCH DAMN PAPER WORK MAYBE I COULD! *cough*

That's out. Oh... and bad snow. Go sit in your corner. You're cold and you make me socks wet.

Umm... what else? I'm tired. I don't have a normal regular sleep schedule anymore and so I don't feel rested. It's a bad deal for me and a good deal for coffee makers everywhere. YAY COFFEE! Oh and isn't the blue guy break dancing just... too much fun!

Edit: Someone stole my laundry soap today. Happy Day of Love and Kissy Faces to you too, bud!

]]> ~Nynae http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/11614105/ http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/11614105/ Mon, 29 Jan 2007 16:43:21 PST
]]> ~Nynae http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/11565979/ http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/11565979/ Thu, 25 Jan 2007 14:51:52 PST
I want you all to know that no matter how we drift, I honor and treasure the connections I have made here with you all.

]]> ~Nynae http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/11481964/ http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/11481964/ Thu, 18 Jan 2007 12:38:58 PST
I'm taking the semester off and spending it with my family in Australia. Not sure when I'm leaving. I'll keep you all posted if you care to know.

]]> ~Nynae http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/11379663/ http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/11379663/ Tue, 09 Jan 2007 19:38:35 PST
I hate the stomach flu. I know you do too.

I'm all better now though! Yay! All better!

]]> ~Nynae http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/11290562/ http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/11290562/ Tue, 02 Jan 2007 15:49:02 PST
]]> ~Nynae http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/11235929/ http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/11235929/ Fri, 29 Dec 2006 16:49:09 PST
My mommy got me a coffee maker. I am now a coffee addict. It's awesome.

Umm... that's all I feel like sharing at the moment.

]]> ~Nynae http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/10992465/ http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/10992465/ Fri, 08 Dec 2006 08:20:15 PST
Other things: This ice needs to melt yo! I'm tired of falling on my booty. It might be well padded, but it's not -that- well padded! Okay so in all honesty, I've only fallen once and it wasn't on my booty but still! My booty feels threatened!

Still more other things: It's been quite some time now... and my furnace is still not working. I'm livid. It's 10 degrees outside (below 0 celsius for you metric people). Space heaters seriously suck up electicity. I'm... really angry! My landlord is a buttface bugger eater.

]]> ~Nynae http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/10903367/ http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/10903367/ Thu, 30 Nov 2006 15:33:35 PST
]]> ~Nynae http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/10828192/ http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/10828192/ Thu, 23 Nov 2006 21:21:05 PST
Grandpa C: I don't think I could find someone as good as you if I searched the whole world.
Grandma C: Well that's what I've been trying to tell you!

Random commercial: Felice Nabiblah.

Shelby hugs.

Hearing from my Grandpa W, the sweets expert, that my pecan pie was wonderful.

I think the first one was what truly turned my day around. Those two have a love that has lasted more than 50 years and it has not been easy going. They still play as though they were kids. I've never heard them exchange harshwords and they're so sweet to each other. I want a love like that and I feel so fortunate to be a product of that love.

Shelby hugs were wonderful.

]]> ~Nynae http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/10756027/ http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/10756027/ Fri, 17 Nov 2006 13:11:58 PST by Lewis Caroll

"'Twas brillig, and the slithy toves
Did gyre and gimble in the wabe;
All mimsy were the borogoves,
And the mome raths outgrabe.
'Beware the Jabberwock, my son!
The jaws that bite, the claws that catch!
Beware the Jubjub bird, and shun

The frumious Bandersnatch!'

He took his vorpal sword in hand:
Long time the manxome foe he sought--
So rested he by the Tumtum tree,
And stood awhile in thought.
And as in uffish thought he stood,
The Jabberwock, with eyes of flame,
Came whiffling through the tulgey wood,
And burbled as it came!
One, two! One, two! And through and through
The vorpal blade went snicker-snack!
He left it dead, and with its head
He went galumphing back.
'And hast thou slain the Jabberwock?
Come to my arms, my beamish boy!
O frabjous day! Callooh! Callay!'
He chortled in his joy.
'Twas brillig, and the slithy toves
Did gyre and gimble in the wabe;
All mimsy were the borogoves,
And the mome raths outgrabe"

]]> ~Nynae http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/10723852/ http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/10723852/ Tue, 14 Nov 2006 14:06:13 PST
It would be totally hilarious if that were true, though.

]]> ~Nynae http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/10684566/ http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/10684566/ Fri, 10 Nov 2006 22:20:33 PST [link]

It is teh funneh

]]> ~Nynae http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/10676652/ http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/10676652/ Fri, 10 Nov 2006 06:46:07 PST
Last night I dreamt that I was with a male friend in a dress shop, trying on the most vibrantly colored dresses. They were blue and green, red and purple. I was trying one particularly luscious red dress in the changing room, one that showed off a rather large proportion of my cleavage, and then I heard a large group of men come in. One of them entered the stall to my right and peeped up over the wall seperating us. He had blond hair and bright blue eyes. I was in the process of getting dressed and was wearing nothing but bra and panties the color of my loofa (I know it's weird... it's purple and pink meshy stuff) but instead of looking at my mostly naked body, he looked directly into my eyes and smiled.

What did you dream?

]]> ~Nynae http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/10669039/ http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/10669039/ Thu, 09 Nov 2006 13:34:10 PST
~Hans Christian Andersen from The Fir Tree

]]> ~Nynae http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/10645418/ http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/10645418/ Tue, 07 Nov 2006 09:03:58 PST
In other news, I got a 99/100 on my accounting exam. I barely studied. I don't know how people manage to fail this class. You put the numbers in the little columns and you add 'em up. It cannot really be that difficult!

]]> ~Nynae http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/10592631/ http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/10592631/ Thu, 02 Nov 2006 11:54:16 PST May we know them
May we be them
May we raise them"

Some of the best

]]> ~Nynae http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/10563733/ http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/10563733/ Mon, 30 Oct 2006 19:38:34 PST
In any case, I was in the grocery store buying some groceries because my cubbards were bare. And in the aisle with the tuna I found one of my former students. He said, "Hi Sara!" all grins and waves. It's been two years, how does this kid recognize me? It was so heart warming. I practicly danced the rest of the way through the store. It made me think seriously again about teaching.

]]> ~Nynae http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/10527173/ http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/10527173/ Fri, 27 Oct 2006 12:23:57 PDT
The disease is chronic, though it seems to come and go. Often people who suffer from this syndrome may have two or three outbreaks a day that may last for an hour or more and then clear up.

Symptoms include lethargy, an overall feeling of relaxation and well being and of course a warm lap. If symptoms persist for more than 4 hours, help might be required in order to satisfy hunger.

There seems to be only one cure for CIL, though it appears to offer only temporary relief. Apon standing, many patience have reported aliviation (I can't spell) of their symptoms and many report being able to continue their activities as normal. If you experience any of the symptoms of CIL please, remember to enjoy them as cats are wonderful cuddlebugs and great lap companions/

]]> ~Nynae http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/10505177/ http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/10505177/ Wed, 25 Oct 2006 10:00:30 PDT
And when you think about what the words really truly mean, did you really need to use them?

Take for example the word bitch. It's probably my least favorite word when used inappropriately. It translates literally to mean female dog, as I'm sure you are all aware. The use of it de-humanizes the target (considering that most people don't have the respect for dogs that I do) not based on actually atributes that person has but rather focusing on their sex, as if a female dog is by far worse than a male dog. Such language serves to dehumanize ALL women and I despise it more than others.

Another example, the word damn. When you damn someone on the street because they cut you off, do you really want to see them burn in hell for all eternity, tortured and utterly miserable in ways you cannot begin to imagine? Do you? Because despite whether or not you believe in hell that is the meaning behind the word. It's a fate worse than death and I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy.

Beyond that, it just irritates me when people call something they think is cool... "the shit." Come on people! We can be more creative and less like three-year-olds who are still fascinated by potty humor.

Therefore, I shall happily stick to words like crap and shoot... despite that the later is usually followed by the word "bang." It is infinitely more appealing that sullying my mouth with worse alternatives.

]]> ~Nynae http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/10495926/ http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/10495926/ Tue, 24 Oct 2006 10:01:47 PDT
Sure! I'll hold...

Lady Melantha? Yes, this is Sara. I have a question for You. What the crap happened to fall?!

]]> ~Nynae http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/10473735/ http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/10473735/ Sun, 22 Oct 2006 08:26:28 PDT
Anyway, I went to the homecoming game on Saturday with my friend Katy. It was my first collegiate sport experience and I have to admit I enjoyed it. I got all excited when we scored this awesome touchdown and made like... four quarterback sacs in a row. It was odd considering that I have very little school spirit. We would have stayed past the first half but it was misserably cold and raining. So we watched the band march and then went home to take a nice long shower.

Not together.

]]> ~Nynae http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/10409052/ http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/10409052/ Mon, 16 Oct 2006 06:27:16 PDT
Something my Grammy always sings when it rains:

"Tudeluma-luma tudeluma-luma
Tooooodel-lei!
Any umber-ellas any umber-ellas
to fix today?
I'll fix your umbrella and go on my way
Singin' tudeluma-luma tude-lei! Tudeluma luma tude-lei! Any umber-ellas to fix today!"

Tudeluma-luma tudeluma-luma
it looks like rain!
Really doesn't matter really doesn't matter
don't mind the rain!
I'll fix your umbrella and go on my way.
Singin' tudeluma-luma tude-lei! Tudeluma luma tude-lei! Any umber-ellas to fix today!"

She seemed to think it was a craftsman's song, though she doesn't know where it came from. It would be interesting to know.

]]> ~Nynae http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/10399883/ http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/10399883/ Sun, 15 Oct 2006 10:41:47 PDT
Robert Creeley

A Form of Women

I have come far enough
from where I was not before
to have seen the things
looking in at me from through the open door

and have walked tonight
by myself
to see the moonlight
and see it as trees

and shapes more fearful
because I feared
what I did not know
but have wanted to know.

My face is my own, I thought.
But you have seen it
turn into a thousand years.
I watched you cry.

I could not touch you.
I wanted very much to
touch you
but could not.

If it is dark
when this is given to you,
have care for its content
when the moon shines.

My face is my own.
My hands are my own.
My mouth is my own
but I am not.

Moon, moon,
when you leave me alone
all the darkness is
an utter blackness,

a pit of fear,
a stench,
hands unreasonable
never to touch.

But I love you.
Do you love me.
What to say
when you see me.

]]> ~Nynae http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/10327238/ http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/10327238/ Sun, 08 Oct 2006 15:55:20 PDT

And on a completely unrelated note... and mostly because I feel silly making two journal entries in one day with little substance... my cat says, "Bless you." It comes out as "meow" but still, it's a bless you.

]]> ~Nynae http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/10324165/ http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/10324165/ Sun, 08 Oct 2006 10:43:58 PDT
I know what the inside of a goat's stomach looks like... and let me tell you it is COOL! There are all sorts of textures in the different chambers... different folds and pillars. The contents however are another story... green mush with fibrous particles that get mushier and more homogenous the farther you go.

There is a reason why they call it gross anatomy.

On a less disgusting note, I saw Mitch Fatel last night. He's a very funny man. You all should go see him [link]

]]> ~Nynae http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/10246847/ http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/10246847/ Sun, 01 Oct 2006 10:54:49 PDT
You are a total daydreamer, and people tend to think you're flakier than you actually are.
While your head is often in the clouds, you'll always come back to earth to help someone in need.

Beyond being a caring person, you are also very intelligent and rational.

You understand the connections of the universe better than almost anyone else.

[link]

Hmmm... do I? If that's the case it's a pretty odd Universe that we live in.

]]> ~Nynae http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/10245323/ http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/10245323/ Sun, 01 Oct 2006 08:24:19 PDT
A tiny six week old kitten, when cornered by a snarling pit bull well over 10 times it's size and weight, with more powerfull jaws and larger teeth, will rear up and take a swing at it's attacker. Would you?

]]> ~Nynae http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/10172215/ http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/10172215/ Sun, 24 Sep 2006 12:22:12 PDT
I think about sex entirely too much as it is. And now... I have no outlet. So I'll sit here quietly and be frustrated. It happens every month.

Okay so it might not be Nature's -cruelest- trick, but it certainly isn't very nice.

]]> ~Nynae http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/10134570/ http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/10134570/ Wed, 20 Sep 2006 16:38:28 PDT 1. Do you like animals?
Err... yes. Possibly too much.

2. Have you ever met an online friend in person?
-Yes.

3. Are you athletic?
-I tryto stay active and be healthy. I walk to school and back, sometimes a couple times a day. I also have an exercise bike that I hop on sometimes, but as far as sports and stuff... nah not really. Unless you'd consider something like SCUBA to be a sport, but I only do it rarely and on a recreational bassis.

4. Are you: thin, fat, athleticlly built etc:
-Bootilicious!

5. How much do you weigh?
-Less than Brian

6. What's your height?
-5'0"... 5'1" on a good day

7. Shoe size?
-7.5

8. Girls- are you tomboyish, girly, normal, etc?
-Pishaw! That's like trying to fit a square peg in a round hole... you might be able to shove it in but it certainly won't fit well.

9. Guys- Are you girly, or guyish?
-Sometimes I have dreams where I have the equipment necessary to answer this question... but currently I do not.

10. How old are you?
- 21, very legal

11. When's your birthday?
- January 27th

12. Do you like to receive giftart?
–Well there are a few I wouldn't mind but all in all, the best gifts are those that are thoughtful and come from the heart.

13. Are you sociable?
–Well sometimes I'm chatty... sometimes I'm rather bristly. It depends on whom I with, if I feel comfortable and relaxed, if I'm stressed out, if I'm sleepy... I mean come on! Few people are honestly simple enough to be able to answer these questions with a yes or no.

14. Do you have many friends?
–The ones that I have mean more to me than an entire sorority ever could.

15. What's your race?
–big-german-headed pretty lady

16. Do you like to talk on the phone?
–Only with a few.

17. Are you single or taken?
–Not on the market.

18. Do you eat meat?
–Yes. I used to not eat anything that had a face, however I wasn't doing it properly and I really suffered for it. I got so anemic that they wouldn't let me donate blood and my blood serum protein levels were so low that I couldn't form scabs so I had very simple cuts that wouldn't heal. Maybe one day I'll do it again, though if I do I'll do it properly.

19. Are you paranoid?
–Not always but sometimes, yes. I'm a weiner, what can I say?

20. Do you read a lot?
-I do my best to.

21. Do you listen to music, what kind?
–Lossa stuff, jazz, some punk and ska, classical, instrumental, vocal, not really into the whole pop thing. Nor the rap thing.

22. Do you play any instruments?
-I used to play the clarinet. I was first chair in concert band my freshman year but haven't picked one up in awhile. I'm kinda self taught in piano (though my Grammy has helped, she's so awesome!) and I can get through the first part of Fur Elise.

23. How long have you been drawing?
-Awhile, though very rarely do I draw anything that is life-shatteringly awesome... if ever. And like everything else, drawing is a skill that you need to practice at... which I haven't done. Sooo...

24.Whats the meaning of life?
-I don't know about the meaning... but I think I know the purpose. Of course anyone who thinks they know something naturally doesn't. I think the purpose of life is to be happy. I'm not talking about hedonistic persuits of pleasure... true happiness. Happiness that comes through compassion, empathy, patience. The happiness that is our natural state of being. To eliminate hate and anger from our lives and live peacefully with those whom we share each breath.

25. Now tag five of your friends!

Oniwaban
Aethele
Gratefuljamhead
Hurgal
Hlessiroo ]]> ~Nynae http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/10085950/ http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/10085950/ Fri, 15 Sep 2006 22:50:26 PDT ~Nynae http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/9938312/ http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/9938312/ Mon, 04 Sep 2006 07:27:09 PDT
Mood: Zee cardiologist
Listening to: "Pennies from Heaven" sung by Billie Holiday
Reading: I'm reading the 7th book of the Wheel of Time

Edit: I realized I misspelled the title

First of all, I would like to say that while it's not an easy path my feet are happy to walk it. I should have gotten off the main path sooner, but I suppose soon enough will have to suffice.

Let us start off at the begining. My Grammy (maternal grandmother) and I are kindred spirits. I love her dearly and I know beyond a doubt that she loves me. She married my maternal grandfather (California Papa) straight out of college. They grew up in the same small town, gone to high school together and they dated while Grammy was at MU (my university) getting her teaching degree. They had my mother and my Grammy worked as a teacher to support my grandpa while he was in medical school. And then after he graduated, he left her. For another woman. And didn't even see my mother until much later, when she was an adult and had me (early 20s, silly mommy). My Grammy was mortified, alone, abandoned, embarassed (because no one got a divorce back then and when you did you lied about it and told everyone he was dead). But most of all, not particularly shocked. Or, I think, too terribly heart broken. She'd had doubts before they got married, but just thought to herself, "Oh, everyone gets cold feet" or "The wedding's already planned, there's no going back now." She let the wind blow her where it would and paid the price.

Now the irony of it all is that Andrew, my boyfriend for the last 3 years and fiance for the last six months, went to high school with me. We've date for nearly all of college. He proposed my junior year (last February) and I accepted with the giddy excitement of someone who's in love with love and absolutely forgot all of my misgivings. I won't tell you the specifics of why I was unhappy, just because I want to protect him. Posting in a public, online journal comes with a responsibility to treat the people you talk about with respect and dignity, a responsibility I intend to honor.

Anyway, the glow lasted... a monthish? And faded. And I was unhappy again. I was lonely and not alone, which is to me far worse than any other loneliness I've felt. But I was willing to let the wind blow me where it would. I was a coward, afraid that the consequences of my actions would be far worse than consequences of letting it be. But I thought about it, and the more unhappy I was the more I thought. Then finally with the help of some friends, not the least of which was my wonderful Grammy, I worked up the courage to break it off. It was a tearful and painful experience, but one that I do not regret in the slightest. I wish that I could have done it sooner, but now that I've found my spine I intend to keep it.

The lesson here... always listen to what your heart is telling you from the moment you hear it. Never ever let your fear stop you from doing what you feel is right. It's cruel to yourself and to those whom your decisions affect... and also in a way dishonest.

I think that the hardest part here is knowing that I've broken his heart. He's changing his life, reading books, thinking about selling his jeep, going to Al-anon meetings, washing up, cooking, asking me to have lunch with him and trying to buy me ballet tickets in the hopes that I'll come back to him. He thinks it's a case of "The grass is always greener..." and intends to put down some fertilizer on his side of the hill. I feel for him. I know that's it hurts, especially to be on that side of this conflict, and I want more than anything for him to heal and to be happy. It breaks my heart to see him look at me with such hope and know in my heart that it will never be fulfilled. Is there anything you guys think I can do to help him out?

Anyway, that's our tour. A few of you have already gotten to go into the roped off sections and I hope that you'll keep what you've seen a secret out of respect for those involved.

Much Love,
Princess Coalminer

*cough* *French accent* We love our bread, we love our butter, but most of all we love each other. ]]> ~Nynae http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/9910003/ http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/9910003/ Wed, 30 Aug 2006 16:21:30 PDT
Anyway, I wanted to make a post because it would be silly to waste a free trial subscription. And while I don't particularly feel like disecting my heart and displaying it for the masses right now, I still wanted to say hi. So..... HI!

]]> ~Nynae http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/9894450/ http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/9894450/ Tue, 29 Aug 2006 09:36:16 PDT ~Nynae http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/9729125/ http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/9729125/ Mon, 14 Aug 2006 19:18:21 PDT
I love chemistry... especially organic chemistry. And I loved Bichemistry. I love Biology and Physics. I love finding problems that are a challenge and looking at it and poking around with the mental tools I've acquired over my three years of college and getting them to unravel. It is so satisfying. Why is it so satisfying?

I think straight up pure math is most satisfying though. The answer is crisp and clean, utterly logically. I do however find some rather odd sort of elation when I get to apply math to a science. One small corner of the world makes complete and utter sense, even for a moment. And then there's the contemplation of all the other little bits you haven't a clue about. All the millions and millions of little bits waiting out there, waiting for someone to discover them, being discovered. We know so little about the world we live in and yet what we already know is too much to cram into one little piddly human brain. The world is amazingly beautiful and intricately complex... from the smallest quark to the largest star more complicated and perfect and inspiring than anything else I've ever had the pleasure of peering at. R ight now in your body there are small miracles of science being performed faster than you can imagine, more elegant and graceful than the most skilled dancer. You've no idea how delicate life is... how many things need to happen to sustain you. I've no idea. The most skilled, intelligent, highly educated people in the world know. It's a marvel. Utterly exciting.

I love math.
Oh and by the way, my grandmother knows everything. ]]> ~Nynae http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/9232593/ http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/9232593/ Fri, 30 Jun 2006 13:48:26 PDT ~Nynae http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/9219599/ http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/9219599/ Thu, 29 Jun 2006 10:03:20 PDT
Peeon at Baskin Robbins
Caterer at the St. Louis Zoo, a sucky job. Food service SARKS
Student Supervisor at my school's cafeteria
Substitue Daycare worker... which I quit because the hours were meh
Research Tech (current... I run pigs)

Five movies I can watch over and over:

Lady and the Tramp
What Dreams May Come
I Am Sam
Pirates of the Caribean
Chocolat (another Johnny Depp movie, OMG dreamy)

Five places I've lived:

Melbourne Australia
Columbia, Mo.
St. Louis, Mo. (including South City, Frontenac and Kirkwood... that counts as three right?)
And Farmington, Mo.

Five TV shows I love:

Charmed... heh
The 4400
Emergency Vets
Animal Cops
Family Guy

Five places I've vacationed:

Brisbane Australia
Sydney Australia
Seatle, WA
Washington, DC
Long Beach, CA

Five of my favorite dishes:

OMG steak fillet... SHH! Don't tell my vegan friends
Homemade chicken noodle soup with carrots and celery and whole wheat noodlies
my Aunt Sue's brisket
Shahi Paneer with paneer I made myself... mmm Indian food
Mommy's homemade caramel cake... do you know how hard it is to make caramel?

Five sites I visit daily:

[link]
[link]
[link]
And umm... the potty. A woman's got to piddle.
The shower, which is next to the potty.

Five places I would rather be right now:

My own private beach someplace where it's sunny and exactly 72 degrees farenheit, where you never get sun burnt and you can get a tan without worrying about skin cancer. Where the water is always a delicious blue, never full of nasty things like jellyfish, sharks, snakes and crocodiles and if they are there they're harmless. Where the natives are all hot men in thongs and bring me calorie free frozen cocktails that taste heavenly and have little pink umbrellas in them. Mmmm...

In bed with a cuddley Phoebe
Somewhere new and exciting
With my Mom, Step-dad, my brother and my sister
Out camping or exploring a cave or underwater or that matter... with a suitable tank of air and a regulator... BCD, mask and flippers, oh and a dive computer. Did I mention my own private beach?

And the answer to Ainia's question, why four and not five? Because I had a really hard time thinkg of five places I've lived. ]]> ~Nynae http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/9078621/ http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/9078621/ Thu, 15 Jun 2006 15:32:23 PDT 2. I'll challenge you to try something.
3. I'll pick a color that I associate with you.
4. I'll tell you something I like about you.
5. I'll tell you my first/clearest memory of you.
6. I'll tell you what animal you remind me of.
7. I'll ask you something I've always wanted to ask you.

Make a comment that says something to the effect of "Meme!" and I'll reply and answer these 7 things about you. Then if I do it for you you have to post it in your journal and so on and so forth. ]]> ~Nynae http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/9003746/ http://Nynae.deviantart.com/journal/9003746/ Wed, 07 Jun 2006 21:45:51 PDT ]]> ~Nynae