http://search.deviantart.com/?q=by:Otimaru&section=today deviantART RSS for by:Otimaru en-us Copyright 2010, deviantART.com Fri, 01 Jan 2010 12:26:19 PST deviantART.com http://blogs.law.harvard.edu/tech/rss http://s.deviantart.com/minish/widgets/apple-touch-icon-precomposed.png http://Otimaru.deviantart.com/journal/27085489/ http://Otimaru.deviantart.com/journal/27085489/ Mon, 07 Sep 2009 22:45:44 PDT So, possibly starting to upload again.
Didn't stop writing, just stopped uploading.
Wasn't making friends, or feedback, so, you know~ No feedback whatsoever and an interaction gets boring.
So, more shit to come soon maybe possibly or by chance just posting something and then another fifteen years of inactivity.
I know if I say I'll commit to something, I won't do it.
(Don't tell me I said that, though, it'll just have the same effect.)
Also, I turned eighteen, that was fun.
Watched movies with my friends (two is plural!) all night and ate candy~
Also, goddamn teacher would let me take goddamn calculus 'cuz I didn't do my goddamn homework.
"FFFFFFFFFFFF-"
-is the adjective I use to describe my immediate mood.
Well, really, because I didn't get good grades in that class at all, I'm sure it looked like I didn't understand a thing. So's I guess it's understandable.
Still annoyed, though.
Getting a free education, and I can't even use it to it's fullest. 'the fuck else is it good for?
Also, got a new computer~
Runs way better than my old one, and I spent like three days playing all the MMO's that used to lag like bitches night and day.
My retinas crisped and curled back, blackened and exhausted - but it was fun.
Also, learning to play the bratsche right handed, tons of fun.
No, really, not even being sarcastic.
Actually, that was a lie; totally being sarcastic.
Hate. Hate.
At playing left handed.
Keep wanting to play faster and dance around a scale or even play the right goddamn note but fingers are just like, " lol, no " and you know how stubborn fingers are.
Yes, you, I'm looking right at you.
I also moved into a new house. Almost exactly like my old house.
And, uh..
Nothing else to be said remains.
This concludes whatever the fuck just happened.

P.S. "How to Read like a Professor" is a great book if you like reading a one-sided conversation in a college classroom from teacher to pupil. I dunno, someone might actually enjoy that, totally not ruling that out; but it's annoying the fuck out of me. Not really that aspect, though, more so the advice he's giving in the book. I keep reading his advice to readers as a writer (because who the fuck is a "reader", anyways?) and I keep raging on the inside.

]]> ~Otimaru http://Otimaru.deviantart.com/journal/23992875/ http://Otimaru.deviantart.com/journal/23992875/ Tue, 31 Mar 2009 19:26:44 PDT Began writing this opera, roight, and kept writing and writing and writing ad infinitum.
And then I'm distracted by time becoming a vague blur and look up to see it's been three months.
And I'm just like "o 3 o". Just like that, my eyes fell below my mouth, which was a three.
It feels mysteriously comforting, though, to know I haven't gotten bored of it, yet.
Writing soundtracks to my own stories, really, kind of vain, but very fun.
I recommend doing this if you're suddenly able to direct large amounts of time and lack of sleep towards continuously tweeking and accommodating [giant list of the things I'm doing that I was gonna write before I looked up and saw that the list was really long].
Right now I'm working on a part that feels very awkward to right in awkward light of recent events.
I've just been outed by someone I knew, really abruptly, I think, but their section is vital to the perpetuation of the plot. Though I don't appreciate them very much anymore from their reactions to things, I've got very strong sources that tell me he can't be all bad, but apparently the feeling isn't mutual. >:
/realizes she's being passive aggressive
The melody I originally wrote burned itself out, though and it's been being repeatedly dissected and Frankenstein'd to be able to support the over-arching harmony and the overtly funky rhythms I wrote in his section.
Outside of my opera, however, life has been dreadingly dull and depressingly monotonous.
It's just the same cycle over and over with little needle points of distraction (ha, that was supposed to be dis-traction, as in a record player needle bouncing off) and fgsdfjnsrgmsrgntn.
At least when I'm writing my opera I don't get enough idle time to become depressed, though if I wasn't forced to go to school I'd probably be writing relentlessly.
*flail*
Having fun, though, writing music and tragedy.
Real life is depressing.
Also, fuck, I need to stop being such a aristocrat all the time, it's making being around people unbearable.
/ingrown hatred of general human fallacy
Okbai.

]]> ~Otimaru http://Otimaru.deviantart.com/journal/23240463/ http://Otimaru.deviantart.com/journal/23240463/ Mon, 16 Feb 2009 17:27:01 PST Or at least an operetta, but "operetta" makes me think of tiny moe opera chibis and that's kind of distracting when you're being dark and broody.
It's about my imaginary death, though it really isn't as dark and broody as my only description of it hence makes it sound.
The feel is really juuust~
Well, it's fickle. There's no real dwelling on any overtly emotional pieces.
Except maybe the whole story itself, but that's not dwelling, that's existing.
Anyways, it's about my imaginary death, and subsequently the death of everything that ever has, is, and will be existing in the possible future.
I'm writing on the concept of life and death meaning nothing to universal existence, but being all that ever is to individual ones, so it'll probably be depressing/confusing to less than inspecting types.
Hopefully enough people in my English class will get it, though~
And, hush, I know it's clichè, but it's my opera, not your's. >:
Will hopefully be getting some more poetic bits derived from my opera writing to be posting up here for my negative two and five eights of a reader to be enjoying.

]]> ~Otimaru http://Otimaru.deviantart.com/journal/22237906/ http://Otimaru.deviantart.com/journal/22237906/ Sun, 28 Dec 2008 06:17:33 PST /grammar
I haven't updated anything or put any new content up or anything in forever. x:
Am totally in the endish-middle of winter break and am totally dreading the return to school.
Also, totally thought I'd be ghosted away and making money on snowy streets, by now, but Travis is a gargantuan genitalia-face and never bought a haus.
:
My voice slipped in tone, or something, (I actually have no idea what happened. \(O.o)/) and it was suddenly a lot harder to sing, but training and diligence and patients and totally singing all night to the kitties that eat from my garbage cans has been helping that~
I've been working on this hallucinogen essay for /ever/ and it keeps writhing and shimmying and refusing to stay still and be written consistently.
It's like one of those, err~
Ember wave things.
It keeps changing and then there's a gap in the wave and it doubles back and ultimately ends up with a thousand little waves everywhere repeatedly changing the face of the material.
And my essay won't let its embers all unite in a single direction, it keeps chopping them up like the granddaddy of all sabotage.
Frustrating. x:
I saw the final step of the "There She Is!" series and I nearly cried in happiness. :'3 <3
I've never seen such a gratifying and undiluted dosage of D'awww and Eeeiii!! in my life.
Srs, go watch it, it's adorable.
I'm getting a little giddy just talked about it. :'3
And, uhm...
I should really do all the homework I haven't been doing in lieu of my depression and the pantheon of additional plagues that enjoy taking residence in my hectic, frenetic, slightly delirious brain.
I'm secretly hoping I'll go to school and all my imaginary friends will have decided to give me shiny orange bottles of T-blockers, prog', and estro'.
Wishing as hard as I can. >:
Also, to anyone who actually reads this~
[link]
Read /this/.
It's so amazingly...eeik <3
It made me majorly emotional at parts.
'kuh /timewaste

]]> ~Otimaru http://Otimaru.deviantart.com/journal/21415545/ http://Otimaru.deviantart.com/journal/21415545/ Mon, 10 Nov 2008 04:33:53 PST Fed up with his backtalk, always mucking up the place and no bother to pay rent.
Lazy vagrant~
So, I kicked the lazy bastard out
And am being productive, in a weird, round about, completely contradictory way.
Productive, I gather, the way chronic slackers are after gathering together to do nothing in particular, but it a very organized manner.
Also~
Really, really, really dark brown eyeliner is my newest friend. <3
Black looks ok, but this new color is /almost/ black, but still a little brown so it blends into my own skin color nicely.
Gives that "sunken eyes" effects I liek~
Also, I totally fancied up some neglected shrubbery I saw.
I was going to spray a haiku onto this neglected building...
But it looked so sad. ; -;
So I cleaned it up a little, stole some flowers, tiny bush things, and other shrubberites and water barrels and totally made a little garden there. Then I sprayed this over in the corner all nice and neat:
"A sad crying Hand
Gripping a Knife fresh with Blood
Sing a Rainbow Song"
In what I think were pretty well correlated earthen colors.
I was gonna go with neon rainbows~
But didn't think it'd match the building's wall's newly freshened look.
Just that wall, of course~
I would've taken all night to clean the whole building.
/slack
It was just a tiny one story buildings, though, like an empty road-side store type.
But it's owners forgot about it. I hope it knows people still care about it. :'3

]]> ~Otimaru http://Otimaru.deviantart.com/journal/21178957/ http://Otimaru.deviantart.com/journal/21178957/ Sun, 26 Oct 2008 21:36:29 PDT Depression isn't good on the creativity~
Milling pointlessly for days with nothing for insouciance has been my routine, really, for about as long as I'm caring to recall.
And my initial "wait until it wears off" plan is failing miserably. .~.
So I'm determined!
...to do something of an nondescript persuasion towards a vague and loftily-grounded goal which may or may not probably exist.
But at least I'm aiming at something, mirite?
I don't really know what's wrong with me at the moment.
Usually, I can just hold these things back and live on skipping happily and metaphorically but awhile back everything just came rampaging into the central point of my psyche and wrecked up the place.
I've been a major hypersomniac as of late, but pretty grateful, being awake a struggle.
It's not healthy, is it?
I mean, just waiting it out has never failed before, but this ordeal is reaching it's tenth week bench and I've long since become frustrated.
I'm tired of the depression, sick of the lethargy and absolutely fed up with being able to produce nothing but a big huge block of BAAAAAAAAAAAW.
I'm going to reach the surface, and I'll do it by force if I need to. I can't just wait until my brain feels like narrowing the sadness faucets to be a productive cell of creation and thought.
But that's what my mantra has consisted off for the past six odd weeks now and let me how successful it's been.
None at all. Zero. Less than that. Imagine "Reverse Infinity" and you might come upon the limit of the incorporability the efficiency of my mantra has achieved.
I feel as if I just want to stop existing.
To stop the mysterious pain on its effect, if the source is beyond my reach.
But that's not possible, and the nearest I can grip is the numb abyss of sleep.
But I've slept too long now, and there's nothing left for me but to mill pointless throughout my day and night waiting for my body to want to rest.
/whine

]]> ~Otimaru http://Otimaru.deviantart.com/journal/20768981/ http://Otimaru.deviantart.com/journal/20768981/ Tue, 30 Sep 2008 22:39:25 PDT I've just been through this depression flash, and I can't do anything like this.
Been slowly learning to think and be motivated through the shroud of muck, so expect some poetically dark bits in the near future?
Spontaneously churning out little narrative pieces that I think are starting to tie together in my head, but I can't say it's the more jubilant pieces of literature I've ever written.
Depression has never given me motivation, but, once I got the hang of it, I really could channel it into some kind of loli poetry machine. :3
Or Prose machine?
I can't say it's been good on my psyche, though~
Fucking horrible, my mood. .~.
Waking up and falling to rest, over and over, and it's become a major source of psychoactive blues.
I've been trying to keep a happy face, to try and just go on like nothing, but...
The feeling just keeps worsening and worsening, and its resolution seems to just be evading my grasp by farther and farther distances.
I'm just about ready for my refreshing new perspective to end now, I liked my "Nothing is real, everything is permitted" outlook, just fine. D;
But, I guess it isn't up to me to decide which chemical receptors are being flooded in my brain, is it?
I'm going to go do something that doesn't require thinking for awhile.

]]> ~Otimaru http://Otimaru.deviantart.com/journal/20661064/ http://Otimaru.deviantart.com/journal/20661064/ Wed, 24 Sep 2008 23:13:40 PDT It's the skill to name a note just by listening to it, and it's frustrating. You'd think I'd naturally grow the skill as a by product of being a musician, but, no, my ears hate me.
So I'm going out of my way to develop the skill and I'm just barely starting to get it~
Which is cool, 'cuz I started just earlier today.
But I'm determined! >3
-And now for something completely different-
I'm totally crushing on a special someone. <3
And their witty and intelligent and funny and delightfully psychopathic~
I can not only talk them, but talk to them and not scare them.
And she's pretty, to boot. :'3
((Also, she has some kind of wonderful human scent. <3 ))
I'm trying not to totally gush all over her but it's hard not freaking my oblivious guy friends with my "And last night.."'s and "Oh, yesterday we.."'s.
Simply put, she's a beautiful person.
But, there are circumstances, ones that I totally respect so I can't really totally go all romantic with her.
And I keep wanting to say all these things to her and my head is like "Whoah, girl, calm, calm, here have a carrot. *strokes mane*" and I just try to be my regular self~
But I totally just wanna cuddle into her shoulder and be all warm and fuzzy with her. :'3
But, ahckkk.
I don't wanna be a bitch and make her life more complicated then it needs to be so I'm just grooving on my own for now~
And I'm pretty cool with that. :3

]]> ~Otimaru http://Otimaru.deviantart.com/journal/20583150/ http://Otimaru.deviantart.com/journal/20583150/ Sat, 20 Sep 2008 10:29:17 PDT It's a good thing I /do/ hate happiness or, well, I don't think being alive would be all that great right now.
-OH WAIT-
I really try to be over it, but sometimes it just creeps back and digs its big ugly claws into my sides and drags me back into it's gnawing mouth all bloody and screamy~
But it hurts, just a little, no matter what I'm doing.
I'm writing music, or watching movies with a cuddly friend, painting, falling asleep, or laying on the kitchen for no apparent reason.
And I can still feel it, like a tiny fishing hook caught in my chest, constantly pulling.
Pulling and tugging and tearing away the flesh, little by little.
But I don't really mind if it tears some flesh away~
It'll grow back just like new, or at least scar over.
But it's just caught there, waiting as if there isn't anything caught on its line.
ARRGGHHH! Dx
I feel like I just need to keep myself constantly occupied, but I've been doing that for months and the feeling still hasn't gone away.
I don't know what to do.
Whining into a white text box on my computer screen helps, though.
Just a little~
Maybe I need to learn to love myself, or something vaguely therapeutic like that. Maybe I'm just caught in a "I can't function without someone to love" cycle.
Whatever it is, it hurts, and it's annoying and frustrating, and nigh-unbearable.
I don't want to give in to it, but I could really...just use a hug right now. ;-;

]]> ~Otimaru http://Otimaru.deviantart.com/journal/20266669/ http://Otimaru.deviantart.com/journal/20266669/ Mon, 01 Sep 2008 07:38:33 PDT Looking back, nothing too epic happened, but the entire dream was fully realized to my senses, and, well, it was fun.
So, I'm at school, or something, when suddenly it turns out some rich guy takes me to his special school, that all of my friends are at, too.
So, I got to some classes, world history ((which I'm actually not taking right now.)) than I'm in English, and I'm way in the back corner.
The room had white walls and dark teal, blue-ish carpet. The door was at the side, at the end of a little hallway made by a wall being built into the room off to the side. Anyways~
The teacher says something about a book being due, or something, and I don't have it, so, it makes sense to shrink a table and turn it in.
Now, I realize I have magical powers so I look at the empty desk next to me. It's one of the chairs+desk things and I think of shrinking it, when my friend next to me tells me not to, 'cuz people will see. I'm still considering it, when she decides it's ok, and asks the people at the "table" next to us if they knew I was a witch. In turn, they all said they did, and I think I already knew, but I was kind of surprised. Then, a girl ((I think)) at our table said she knew, too. I think there was someone else, but they didn't say anything.
So, I said some silly magic words along the lines of "Shrinkus Winkus" ((I think there were a few attempts without the words, and then a few where I didn't flick my wrist at the right time/way)), or something, and the table shrank a little. I think it also turned into some kind of blue casserole. A really pleasant blue to look at, though, 'cuz someone (( I think the initial girl, or someone from the table next to ours)) said it looks really blue, and really good. But, it still wasn't small enough, so I tried it a few more times, playing with the words, until I'm pretty sure I just said "Shrink" and flicked my wrist and pointed at it. Finally, it was small enough, but I can't remember what I did with it. Then I went to go find my friend Matt, so I was in the halls which was unevenly crowded. I couldn't find him, so I said to my finger "Peee-Oint Me to Matt!" and I was pointed, but the finger kept moving around and some friends came by and said something about him leaving. Suddenly, I had to go to my world history class, to talk to the teacher, Mr.Gaar, for some reason. So, I either fly or walk over to the classroom door, either fly or walk through it, and walk a little and realize it's uber-crowded in the halls, so I think a little. I realize I can fly, so I say "Fly" and then "Time Stop", but everything only slows down a little. So, I fly above the crowded and reach another hallway and walk in and talk to the kids inside, but apparently, some of the kids and teachers had to leave at the end of the day. I was one of them. So, I looked around the class a little, and chilled, before leaving and flying over the crowd again, using the same combination of spells, except this time I think I also used super-speed.
Anyways, I eventually thought to get out and went to the stair case, but it was crowded, I think. I either walked through, or flew, and made it out.
Once I got out, I was in this weird pool area I was in in a previous dream. Two pools with a low wall and a life guard stand on the wall. One was heated, and the other cold, at least in the previous dream. In this dream, it was all empty. I took this as a bad sign and decided to leave this rich guy's school place, so I took flight and got to see everything from a really high view, and the land around the school was like a bay, but it looked all muddy, and like a strip mine. Also, it looked desolate, so I flew to where I thought my school would be, right over this little ridge, or the bay right next to it, but that was empty. I realized I had actually been taken really far away from my school and decided to fly away. I flew over to the sun, by some mountains and then went out, I flew down over by China and saw the Great Wall from the sky. It was built in parts that overlapped each other and there were some samurai-looking guys shooting arrows from the top ((In retrospect, that's actually pretty ridiculous.)). So, I flew some more, and there were still some mountains to my right, and some plains and buses and stuff. I noticed a little gather of little spirit monsters and this weird doll things, and what I thought was a Buddhist monk, or something. I landed on the other side of the little monsters and doll things ((which slid side to side on the little horizontal hole in the ground. So, I stepped forward, and smiled, and made the obstacles faint, or go to sleep, or something, by putting my hand out in front of me as I walked up to them. I guess I was some kind of spiritual guru. Anyways, I sat in front of the monk, which turned out to be some nice witch lady. We smiled at each other and it was really pleasa... ]]> ~Otimaru http://Otimaru.deviantart.com/journal/19813348/ http://Otimaru.deviantart.com/journal/19813348/ Wed, 06 Aug 2008 17:27:20 PDT And get my "legal" all-clear sign for my hormones.
I would totally go DIY and take the self medicating route~
If it wasn't for my lack of 18 year old-hood.
For now, some make-up, hair prepping and some pretty clothes will hopefully be enough. :'3
But I'm wondering if I can just show up "en femme" on my first day of junior year.
If I could just ease myself into it.
Well, not really myself, but the people around me.
But, then, once the idea of making my body follow the ease of others came in, I scratched it.
If looking like a girl makes me happy, then fuck anybody else. D<
Yet, my parents are still pressuring me on it.
They thought, I'm assuming, if I take it slow, I'll eventually "grow out" of the idea. .-.
It makes me a very sad panda, when they think that~ They're convinced that I've never shown any signs, that they would've noticed if I were really girl.
They tell me I'm an open book.
But, there's so many other things they've never known about me.
A lot of things that they still don't know.
A lot of things I'm still scared to tell them. ;-;
But, at least I can get a psychiatrist visit out of them. :3
Though our aims are different, maybe a psychiatrist's all-green will help convinced them. <3

]]> ~Otimaru http://Otimaru.deviantart.com/journal/19618340/ http://Otimaru.deviantart.com/journal/19618340/ Sun, 27 Jul 2008 05:59:02 PDT After first I didn't really like it.
Well, I did like it, it's a beautiful name, but I didn't feel like it was really "me".
But, the more I thought about it, the more I felt like I could really be that person.
That person, of course, being me, but you guys know what I mean.
I decided on "Circe".
You could pronounce it "Sir-Say" or "Seh-Er-Say".
I prefer the second, but the shift between the first and second syllables is so slight, that I don't think people will hear it very well.
Regardless, I've chosen my name, and, well...
I feel like a little girl in a candy store. :'3
(( Cassi. >.> ))
I feel almost enlightened now that I can fully assume my right female identity.
And I can finally rid myself of my oppressive, suffocating, tormenting, mind-stabbing old male one.
I've totally just leveled up. :3
Also, if you don't get the reference in the title, I'd advise you to read The Oddesy, but that could take awhile. x3
Well, I'm off to go do whatever it is I do when I'm not typing in my journal.
Bai bai~
-wavewave-

]]> ~Otimaru http://Otimaru.deviantart.com/journal/19588642/ http://Otimaru.deviantart.com/journal/19588642/ Fri, 25 Jul 2008 10:49:07 PDT I'm still trying to decide on a name.
With all the pondering and introspection that goes on around here, you'd think I'd be able to somehow stumble upon a name that fit me. .-.
Oh, well, I shouldn't be forcing this, anyways.
I'm sure some name will find itself chosen by me eventually.
Until then~
I'll be practicing my voice. :3
I've been getting pretty close, too.
I'm a singer, so I have at least some degree of higher control over my voice, but getting rid of that last little bit of masculine tone is so frustrating. D:
If anything, it's hard to maintain.
The lack of tone, I mean.
Though, sometimes my voice seems to get stuck in it and I can use it effortlessly.
~and I feel all warm and fuzzy inside. :'3
All together, with my steadily more convincing appearance, my voice, and, of course, my mirror, I've been building up my confidence.
It's going to probably be the most nerve racking moment of my lift up to date, but I know I have to get it over with. > w<
*flailflail*
I have to do this. .-.

]]> ~Otimaru http://Otimaru.deviantart.com/journal/19458525/ http://Otimaru.deviantart.com/journal/19458525/ Fri, 18 Jul 2008 05:10:02 PDT Well, started it.
I finished starting it! : D
It's just a transgendered symbol on the back of my hand, and it's all just so wonderfully even!
I really wanna take the LITHA aftercare regime, but there's no way I'm not getting an infection that way.
So, I'm going with just mildly irritating the shit out of it.
Though, it always stings for awhile afterwards. D:
But, still I'm pretty excited about it.
Admittedly, I am SO unprofessional.
I did it all with a razor blade, a pair of blue tweezers, and a roll of toilet paper. : D
And no anesthetic, either.
It didn't hurt that much, though.
And it was kind of fun seeing the initial blood swell up from the slices.
Though, during the procedure, I totally accidentally poked the wound a bunch of times, and didn't feel it.
And, now, the morning after, I can't even poke little island of skin in the middle without a slight sting.
I think it was the adrenaline.
Well, I'll see if I can upload a picture of it.

]]> ~Otimaru http://Otimaru.deviantart.com/journal/19368831/ http://Otimaru.deviantart.com/journal/19368831/ Sun, 13 Jul 2008 09:12:50 PDT I've just been waiting pointlessly.
I guess you could call it procrastinating.
But I really did need the time.
Two, almost three years spent in deep thought is time right?
Not just some fanciful idea that springs to my head?
Yet everyone still seems to think so.
My parents still repeat their mantra...
"You might be wrong; Give it time. You might be wrong; Give it time. You might be wrong; Give it time."
Onto infinity..
But...
I'm finally beginning to take action...
It's frightening.
It really is.
Working up the courage to tell those close to...
...who I really am.
Knowing just as well, that a friendship that can be broken as such isn't worth having.
But it's still nerve racking.
Even my parents, who I nearly despise, are hard to speak to.
Though, to them, it's mostly for fear.
I'm truly afraid of the outcome.
But my friends and loved ones, those who I've allowed to come near me...
...Fear.
I know I shouldn't, but I still do.
I'm still young, how ever, 16 so I do have a few years to begin progressing.
Though, I'd much rather begin, well, now.
But it's all just so...frightening.

]]> ~Otimaru http://Otimaru.deviantart.com/journal/19284570/ http://Otimaru.deviantart.com/journal/19284570/ Wed, 09 Jul 2008 01:43:53 PDT After about two years of inactivity, I'm back and will finally start filling up my gallery.
I've had no ways to produce art I could submit for the longest time.
((I've been making music for two years.))
But I finally have my hands on a reliable computer.
Whoo~

]]> ~Otimaru http://Otimaru.deviantart.com/journal/10798572/ http://Otimaru.deviantart.com/journal/10798572/ Tue, 21 Nov 2006 10:19:51 PST I finally got it. I'm not sure what the logic is to back it up but...
It's big now! :3
So...um...enjoy!

]]> ~Otimaru http://Otimaru.deviantart.com/journal/10792683/ http://Otimaru.deviantart.com/journal/10792683/ Mon, 20 Nov 2006 19:05:39 PST I'm sure it's something mind-blowingly obvious.
And i'm sure i'll feel like a total idiot when I finally figure it out.
For now...enjoy the mini version of the real picture.
Sorry 'bout all this. ^.^;

]]> ~Otimaru