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        <title>deviantART: by:PoetryFreak108</title>
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        <pubDate>Wed, 16 Dec 2009 00:35:32 PST</pubDate>        
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                <title>Anger</title>
                <link>http://PoetryFreak108.deviantart.com/journal/28384292/</link>
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                <pubDate>Sun, 15 Nov 2009 20:26:56 PST</pubDate>
                
                <description><![CDATA[ I'm drowning. Simple huh? Right there in the title. I'm also afraid. I don't think I'm afraid of what they'll say so much as... I'm afraid of what I'll say. I'm afraid of this monster that lives in my head. It's like.... a dragon. No not a dragon. Those are simply mythical animals with a purpose. They aren't evil and never were. They eat young maidens because it's their nature to do so. No. This thing in me is no dragon. It's a thing past an animal. It is evil. It's a part of me that was never let out. A part of me that I have stifled my whole life, but with every word and strike of the hand it grew. It keeps growing. I need to learn control. Constant control. I must constantly keep myself in check or this monster will swallow me and everyone around me. It could kill and it would without a moments hesitation. My monster is quick, concise, and thorough. It won't leave witnesses. It won't give you a moment to scream. It will destroy everyone before they know what's happening. The blink of an eye, a moment of anger or rage is all it would take. Then the beast would rise and take control again. I can't keep letting things go, but I can't let the monster take care of it. I have to find a balance to it. A way to show them... No one knows about the monster. What would they think if they did?<br /><br /> ]]></description>
                <author>~PoetryFreak108</author>
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                <title>The Road Ahead</title>
                <link>http://PoetryFreak108.deviantart.com/journal/26897378/</link>
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                <pubDate>Sat, 29 Aug 2009 14:22:31 PDT</pubDate>
                
                <description><![CDATA[ I'm scared. No that's not right. I'm terrified. I don't know of what exactly. I only have a vague idea. I do know that it's a crippling fear and that it takes every ounce of energy I have to fight it each day. No one knows my fear. I struggle with it alone. I hope that admitting to it here, some of the burden may be lifted. Maybe no one is listening and no one will read this journal. Maybe my words will fall upon blind eyes. Maybe I will still be alone in the battle. But maybe not.<br /><br /> ]]></description>
                <author>~PoetryFreak108</author>
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                <title>I'm Engaged!!!!!!</title>
                <link>http://PoetryFreak108.deviantart.com/journal/23109369/</link>
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                <pubDate>Mon, 09 Feb 2009 18:43:57 PST</pubDate>
                
                <description><![CDATA[ Austin proposed to me on February 10th. Yesterday. He did it in front of my whole family and he proposed with an opal. That means I get to pick my diamond!!! yay!!!<br /><br /> ]]></description>
                <author>~PoetryFreak108</author>
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                <title>What to do?</title>
                <link>http://PoetryFreak108.deviantart.com/journal/21410283/</link>
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                <pubDate>Sun, 09 Nov 2008 18:23:18 PST</pubDate>
                
                <description><![CDATA[ I love him. He's everything I want and all the things I need but never had. He actually almost beat the hell out of his own uncle for calling me a bitch! I mean sure his uncle is a total druggy dickhead and he was arguing with him anyway, but that is NOT the point! He almost laid him out for calling me a bitch! No one has ever physically or verbally defended me... that was so amazing!! I love him so much! I know I'm annoying but I can't help it! I just do.<br /><br />~Rose~<br /><br /> ]]></description>
                <author>~PoetryFreak108</author>
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                <title>My Love</title>
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                <pubDate>Tue, 16 Sep 2008 09:16:34 PDT</pubDate>
                
                <description><![CDATA[ How the hell did this happen again? I hate feeling like this... but I love feeling like this. But it seems that I attract it and once I have it I'm addicted to it. Well, I'm certainly addicted to him... His smile haunts my dreams and his voice echos in my memory. He is always with me. Arms tight around me. Lips pressed against my ear. Whispering softly <i> "I love you baby. Don't worry I'm here." </i> <br /><br />He never leaves my side as long as I can remember his face, his kiss, his embrace. So tender and full of passion and love. Missing him breaks me but not so much that the first smile when I see him next can't put me right back together. I don't know how it happened again but it did. I'm in love with him. And this time I will never let him go.<br /><br />~Rose~<br /><br /> ]]></description>
                <author>~PoetryFreak108</author>
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                <title>College</title>
                <link>http://PoetryFreak108.deviantart.com/journal/20185676/</link>
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                <pubDate>Wed, 27 Aug 2008 14:17:03 PDT</pubDate>
                
                <description><![CDATA[ I don't like it here. I don't like being surrounded by people I don't know. I don't like being forced to be social. I don't like it that being anti-social will affect my grade. I don't like that I am forced to put myself into situations where I have panic attacks because it is required. I don't like sharing a bathroom with an entire dorm full of girls. I don't like missing him this much. So much my chest hurts. So much I don't want to get out of bed. I don't like this. This wasn't a good idea... I have to get out...<br /><br /> ]]></description>
                <author>~PoetryFreak108</author>
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                <title>six days</title>
                <link>http://PoetryFreak108.deviantart.com/journal/20009199/</link>
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                <pubDate>Sun, 17 Aug 2008 17:50:09 PDT</pubDate>
                
                <description><![CDATA[ so... I have six days until I leave for college. Granted, it's not far away and granted I can come home anytime. But damn! Is it so much to ask for a little emotion around here? The only person that even kinda gives a shit is my boyfriend and he won't talk about it because he can't stand the thought of me leaving! So here I am, less than a week before my departure and I have no one to talk to about it and I'm starting to think that I don't even want to go! I don't want the stress of it! at all!<br /><br />~Rose~<br /><br /> ]]></description>
                <author>~PoetryFreak108</author>
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                <title>Collage/What I get to leave behind</title>
                <link>http://PoetryFreak108.deviantart.com/journal/19777480/</link>
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                <pubDate>Mon, 04 Aug 2008 18:56:15 PDT</pubDate>
                
                <description><![CDATA[ So I figured it out and I have three weeks and two saturdays until I leave for college. I am leaving my boyfriend here... This really really sucks... He is the best boyfriend I have ever had and whats worse is that before he was the best boyfriend I have ever had, he was the best friend I have ever had. He's always there to make me smile when I've had a bad day and I'm down. He's freakin adorable because he's one of those clumsily cute guys that really never knows what to say and hardly ever says the right thing at the right time. He's one of those guys that when he doesn't have money for flowers, he washes your car while you sleep. He's the type of guy that will break every silence with either a weird face or something really dumb just to make you smile. I hate having to leave behind the one person I was ever really myself around. The one person I feel totally comfortable around. My only solace comes in the fact that we will talk everyday and that I will see him at least once every two weeks. The bad thing is what I might lose if I go. Namely him. I'm just hoping that our love and our willingness to work for what we want is enough to get us through the distance. I know I'm willing to work my ass off, and the great part is, so is he. I'm not alone anymore. I hope it stays that way...<br /><br />~Rose~<br /><br /> ]]></description>
                <author>~PoetryFreak108</author>
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