http://search.deviantart.com/?q=by:Problembarn&section=today deviantART RSS for by:Problembarn en-us Copyright 2009, deviantART.com Sun, 06 Dec 2009 02:28:44 PST deviantART.com http://blogs.law.harvard.edu/tech/rss http://s.deviantart.com/minish/widgets/apple-touch-icon-precomposed.png http://Problembarn.deviantart.com/journal/21056640/ http://Problembarn.deviantart.com/journal/21056640/ Sun, 19 Oct 2008 02:16:18 PDT
]]> ~Problembarn http://Problembarn.deviantart.com/journal/19731124/ http://Problembarn.deviantart.com/journal/19731124/ Sat, 02 Aug 2008 06:46:37 PDT
]]> ~Problembarn http://Problembarn.deviantart.com/journal/18174280/ http://Problembarn.deviantart.com/journal/18174280/ Mon, 05 May 2008 02:07:03 PDT
]]> ~Problembarn http://Problembarn.deviantart.com/journal/16637569/ http://Problembarn.deviantart.com/journal/16637569/ Wed, 30 Jan 2008 01:09:50 PST
Thaks and godbye

]]> ~Problembarn http://Problembarn.deviantart.com/journal/16338072/ http://Problembarn.deviantart.com/journal/16338072/ Thu, 10 Jan 2008 01:00:47 PST Kertomaan minulle sumun läi saattajasta
vastarannan yksinäisestä aamunodottajasta"

Life feelt like that right now. Nothing works as it should. And in my mind I wish I would wake up soon. Wake up and live as normal people do. But no, I can't.

"Yörhosen siivistä
päälleni satava tainnuttava tomu
nämä pehmeät pinnat syövät jalkojani"

Life is compilcte. You should do everything, cant forget anything. You wish you were someone else - someone normal. Feels as I'm not allowed to think what I thind, not allowed to do what I do. Not allowed to live as I do. Locked inside the four walls at hone.

"kun uni kuolee, minä suljen ihoni huokoset
kun uni kuolee, pidän kylmän veren sisälläni
kun uni kuolee, olen täynnä piilopaikkoja
jotka haluan löytää"

If I would wake up, I would like to understand things. Trie to understand why am I so stupid. Why life hates me, and why I haven't been happy in my life. The only things that makes me happy are my boyfriend and my rabbits.

"Harvoin minä olen sinua ajatellut, olen vain ihminen.
Pääni haluaisi, mutta lihani ei tottele.
Vetäydyn velttona peiton alle."

I know I should do a lot of more thind every day. And in my life. But It won't work out, not at all. Sometimes, o quite often to be honest, I would just want to hide and fell a sleep, and wake up as a better person.

"Olen minä huutanut sinulle
tavoitellut tukea
ja aina kun sanot sen
ihan mitä vaan."

Lot's of times I've just screamed, screamed things no-one can understand. But still he tries to undersand me. I love him. I'm happy he tries to understand me every morning I wake up next to him, every evening I ell a sleep next to him. How can he be that strong?

"Neljä seinää nurkistaan vetävät yhtä tuulta
Huojuva heinä kurkistaa pientareilla kahta puolta
Matkasta tulee, matkasta tulee pitkä
Gramofonin neula kiertää samaa ympyrää"

Day after dat, same things happens. But nothing changes. Some things are good, other are bad. I wish I could me happier sometimes. Not that much dark thaugts, and trie to thing what I say, but no, I cant. I'm to stupid.. too stupid.

"Since I was born I started to decay.
Now nothing ever ever goes my way"

Wish I wouldn't have been born as this. But if I haden't I wouldn't fell in love with him. And I love him. Life is too difficult to be easy.


Lyrics:
Verenpisara - Aamunodottaja
Verenpisara - Kun uni kuolee
Verenpisara - Harvoin
Viikate - He eivät hengitä
Placebo - Teenage Angst
Placebo - This Picture

"Farewell the ashtray girl
Forbidden snowflake
Beware this troubled world
Watch out for earthquakes
Goodbye to open sores
To broken semaphore
You know we miss her
We miss her picture"

]]> ~Problembarn http://Problembarn.deviantart.com/journal/14925814/ http://Problembarn.deviantart.com/journal/14925814/ Fri, 05 Oct 2007 11:32:43 PDT Too many thaugts, too many feelings, too mucht time alone. Depressing.

My live-in boyfriend is as far as you can get from home right now. I would have wanted to go with im to China. But not. Instead I did go west last weekend, when he has gone east. I was down to Sweden after a lillte little rabbit. And we are going to call her Lewi if Lewis Hamilton wins the F1 this weekend in Shanghai, where my live-in boyfriend is watching. We also have that 4 months old rabbit that is called Hami, also mamed after F1 Hamilton.

The last weeks has been hard, and difficult. Hope this will result in something, good or bad. Doesn't matter, the only thing that matters right now is that I need a result. Hope I'll get it as soon as possible.

And during this depressing thing I kind of lost myself, and I feel it hard to go out and take photos. I rather sit alone in the dark. That's not me, that's depressing. I want to find myself as a photographer as soon as possible.

]]> ~Problembarn http://Problembarn.deviantart.com/journal/14525099/ http://Problembarn.deviantart.com/journal/14525099/ Fri, 07 Sep 2007 01:38:25 PDT
I still don't know if I'll have any more rabbits, 'cause my my live-in boyfriend has a kind of other opinion than I have.

I would want to get a friend to Hami, because we are at work 8-9hours per day, if not more, and we have to trie to seleep for about 7-8 hours and at last we don't have so much time to spend with her, even if I want to.

]]> ~Problembarn http://Problembarn.deviantart.com/journal/13995300/ http://Problembarn.deviantart.com/journal/13995300/ Thu, 09 Aug 2007 22:58:22 PDT And of course you're welcome to visit them over and over again.

And yes, I promise I'll soon update some new photos. I do have lots of ideas, some of them are very experimental, some less experimental. You have to wait to see what kind of ideas I have.

And then some GREAT news! If everything goes well I do have an exhibition at Tampere in Finland in the end of this year. I really look forward to it. But I still do have to decide wich photos I'll take there. If u have any ideas, feel free to send me a note, or let me know aabout it in some other way.

This weekend is going to be very slow, 'cause I'm waiting for a little baby-rabbit from the the other side of finland. And it will come with some of mine friends from a rabbit-show on the sout-coast on sunday up to here where I live. It's a dwarf lop. I can't wait to have that little creature at home. And I'm already very anxious, and time goes on far to slowly. (And we do NOT get her to replace Koodi!!)

As some good news, my life has got some balance after Koodis death again. Even if I miss her much, but we have two big photos of her hanging on the walls at home. Also we do have some other big photos at home I've shooted, and Sami wanted to have hanging on the walls theese two photos; [link] and [link] . Siza is 700x508mm on all 4 photos we hawe at home.

Next week is going to be interesting. Because I'm going back to work with that shoulder, and I do not know how it will work out at work. Probably there wont be any problems as long as there doesn't happen anything at work, but if there does happend something, it might not go as is hould. But no more about it, I'll see how it goes next week, and that's it.

And probably I'll edit this later when I figure out how I could type down what I'm thinking on, and when someone teached me some english vocabulary. And such things....

UPDATE I: (5.8 '07)
Less than one hour left until we get our baby-rabbit. Why do they have to be out there with a car that can't drivr any faster than 80kmph. They're about 80km from here now, so it will take about half an hour before I get her. I can't wait - too excited to sleep, too excited to concentrate enough to read, or to watch tv.

UPDATE II: (6.8 '07)
We did get our baby homelast night, she isn't shy at all, she wants to explore evereything around her. We haven't still decided what we ewill call her at home, some suggestions we have, but the 2 best of them are a bit long, but good names though.
Last night she spent in our livingroom, today she'll move out to her brand new cage on the balcony.
Otherwise I'm at work now, and an't wait for four more hours before I've done my job today, and can go home to her. She's so cute, but fast, little rabbit. Some baby-photo can be seen on my homepages on her own page ( [link] ).

UPDATE III (8.8 '07)
As it loks right now, Hami is going to her first rabbit-show in three weeks. I'm not so sure it goes well, cause her fur is quite fat and vet and doesn't feel as it shold fee. But let's see if it will get better if I wash her during the weeknd.
But that little sweety has calmed down a bit now, and she has spent some time with us on the coach watching TV.

UPDATE IV (10.8 '07)
Hate this. I have to be at school the whole weekend. Right now I don't like it at all! I don't want to be there. Even if I probably will say thats it was good i was there and took the exam, when I'm done there.
Well, next week I'm going to Sweden, to Gothenburg where my cousin live. It wil probably be fun. But right now it doesn't feel as good as it should. Because right now I would want to be able to work seriously at work. And of course get something done about the exhibition @ Tampere later this year.
I hate this, right now am I happy at home, but when I get out of home I get sad, I don't know why - but I hate it. Hate it.

UPDATE V (10.8 '07)
Well, today we started to move together with Sami, it could have vent better, but I have to wait until I know how it would be when everything is as it should. Right now my feeling about it is more like "whatever", wich I hate.
And it's depressing to know that I have to be at school tomorrow and on sunday. I don't want to. I would rather go and wisit my grand-parents from my fathers side (wich I hate), rather than be at school. This is depressing.

UPDATE VI (11.8 '07)
Well, first day of this weekends school is over, but I don't know how tomorrow would be. I just don't want to go there. When the teacher speaks for 5 hours just thing that are so clear that everyon... ]]> ~Problembarn