http://search.deviantart.com/?q=by:Rykua&section=today deviantART RSS for by:Rykua en-us Copyright 2009, deviantART.com Sat, 19 Dec 2009 15:48:42 PST deviantART.com http://blogs.law.harvard.edu/tech/rss http://s.deviantart.com/minish/widgets/apple-touch-icon-precomposed.png http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/26598304/ http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/26598304/ Fri, 14 Aug 2009 20:58:47 PDT
That's the only rule. There will be lots of questions to be answered which all have their own little category. Afterwards, add all the points that you earned from each question and check out your result. This was not meant to offend anyone so I apologize if you're offended. This was meant to help people. Anyways, feel free to add this into your journal and have fun answering the questions.

_________
Name:

What is the name of your character?

-John.

Does your character's name have some kind of special meaning? [2 points if yes]

-Nope. It's just my name... unless my parents have a special meaning for it that I'm unaware of.
_________
Fandom:

What is/are the main fandom(s) your character is in? [3 points if in more than 1]

-Fire Emblem.
_________
Appearance:

Is your character unusually attractive? [3 points]

-No.

Does your character have some type of unusual characteristic? (i.e. Cat ears, cat tail, unusual eye color, Unusual hair colors [firey red, blue, white, green, rainbow, purple and pink all count]) [4 points. 5 extra for Cat features if the character is in anime fandom]

-No.

Does your character's clothing resemble any canon character's? [2 points]

-Not anymore. That changed about 40-ish chapters ago.
_________
Race/powers:

Is your character from a place that the fandom doesn't take place in? [3 points]

-Yeah. He's from the real world (3 points)

Is your character related to a supreme being? (ie, god/goddess, Satan, angels etc...) [6 points]

-No. (3 points)

Does your character practice witch craft? [2 points]

-No. (3 points)

Can your character change form? [2 points]

-No. (3 points)
_________
Affair with canons:

Is your character in love with a canon? [4 points]

-Yes. (7 points)

Are they romantically involved? [4 points]

-Yes. (11 points)

Do they end up having kids? [4 points]

-No. (11 points)

Did they get married? [2 points]

-No. (11 points)

Do they have flaws in their relationship? [Not worth any points]

-Don't know... it's JUST started in the last chapter.(11 points)

Are there other canons who lust over your character? [4 points. Extra 3 if more then one canon lusts after your character]

-Nope. (11 points)

Is your character related to any of the canons by blood? [2 points]

-Nope. (11 points)

Is your character in love with more than one canon? [2 points]

-No. (11 points)

Has your character had past romantic relationships with other canons? [7 points]

... yes. (18 points)

Does your character hate any of the canon characters and wishes to hurt/kill them? [6 points]

No, not really. He really truly dislikes Shinon, but not to that extreme. (18 points)
_________
History:

Has your character ever been involved with prostitution/drugs/child abuse/rape? [4 points]

No. (18 points)

Has your character had any tragedy in her/his past? [5 points]

No. (18 points)
_________
56-88 = Uber sue; I'm sorry but your character is a total sue. Try not to make your character too powerful or too attractive. Maybe give your character some flaws and you can be sure to have an OC. Keep on developing your character; he/she has a lot potential.

41-55 = Mary Sue. Your character is rough around the edges but with a little more polishing then your character will become a loveable OC. Maybe either give your character more or less flaws. Try to make them a bit more believable and you will have an OC.

21-40 = You have a very well balanced character. Good job on having a true OC.

20 and under = Anti sue. Why are you taking this?

]]> ~Rykua http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/25488171/ http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/25488171/ Tue, 23 Jun 2009 05:11:27 PDT
I re-read Spellbinding Radiance the other day... re-read the story in its entirety, and fell in love with the story for the first time since I created it. I'm currently writing chapter 42 now and going to attempt to get my writing flair back.

I miss it, to be honest.



I also have started an original fiction of mine... although I have to say it just doesn't feel the same as writing an SBR chapter. If you want to read it, you can go to this link:

[link]



Also... I'd like to say again that I have a message board. If you want to join, you can come to this link and check us out:

[link]



Aside from that... nothing much is going on in my life. Once again, I feel compelled to take up art again, but I realize I really need to focus and get down my writing and my music before I really tackle art.



There's so much more, but being sick... well... yeah, I'll give a much more encompassing post later.

]]> ~Rykua http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/25029973/ http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/25029973/ Sat, 30 May 2009 09:19:47 PDT
Randomly write down 12 characters from your fandoms without looking at the questions.

1: Quistis Trepe
2: Vyse
3: Tifa Lockhart
4: Soren
5: Luna Lovegood
6: Fina
7: Zelda
8: Elincia
9: Marth
10: Lucca
11: Pokemon Trainer
12: Kefka

1) Have you ever read a Six/Eleven fic? Do you want to?
Fina/Pokemon Trainer... lol, wtf? I may read it for the lulz

2) Do you think Four is hot? How hot?
Soren? ... uh, not really. I'm straight, kthxbai...

3) What would happen if Twelve got Eight pregnant?
If Kefka... got Elincia... pregnant.

... what... the... fuudge...

4) Can you recall any fic(s) about Nine?
Not off the top of my head... but I'm sure they exist.

5) Would Two and Six make a good couple?
Vyse and Fina? Mmm, actually, yes.

6) Five/Nine or Five/Ten?
Luna Lovegood/Marth: ... uh, wut? No.
Luna Lovegood/Lucca: ... I don't think so.

7) What would happen if Seven walked in on Two and Twelve having sex?
If Zelda walked in on Vyse and Kefka... having... sex...? Oh god, I don't know what she'd do. Brain short circuit.

8) Make up a summary for a Three/Ten fic.
What will happen when brawny Tifa Lockhart gets tired of being the best and needs coaching from Lucca to improve her brains? What happens whens student and teacher falls in love?

9) Is there any such thing as One/Eight fluff?
Quistis Trepe/Elincia? Doubt it.

10) Suggest a title for a Seven/Twelve hurt/comfort fic.
Kefka and Zelda? No.

11) What kind of plot device would you use if you wanted Four to deflower One?
Soren deflower Quistis Trepe? Beat her in a knowledge bowl of tactics or something.

12) Does anyone on your friends list read Seven slash?
Zelda slash? Maybe...

13) Does anyone on your friends list read Three het?
Tifa het? I bet.

14) Does anyone on your friends list write or draw Eleven?
I think someone's drawn Pokemon Trainer before.

15) Would anyone on your friends list write Two/Four/Five?
Vyse/Soren/Luna Lovegood...? Please, dear god. No.

16) What might Ten scream at a moment of great passion?
... uh... "EUREKA!"

17) If you wrote a song-fic about Eight, which song would you choose?
Elincia... would be... Eye of the Tiger. That because of the change she went through between games.

18) If you wrote a One/Six/Twelve fic, what would the warnings be?
Quistis, Fina, and Kefka? The warning would be, "Extreme nihilism and depression."

19) What might be a good pick-up line for Two to use on Ten?
Vyse on Lucca? Um, "Do you have a mirror in your pocket, because I see myself in your pants."

20) When was the last time you read a fic about Five?
Never...?

21) What is Six's super-sekrit kink?
Fina...? Oh god, remembering a certain fic about Fina and Cupil... oh god, oh god, oh god... help me...

22) Would Eleven shag Nine?
Would Pokemon Trainer shag Marth...? Pokemon Trainer shag Marth... oh god, that'd be HILARIOUS.

... although when I read the question, I had to lol my effin' brains out and then wtf for a few minutes.

23) If Three and Seven get together, who tops?
Tifa and Zelda? Well, we got one really good fist-fighter who is decent in magic... and on the other hand we got a darn good mage whose alter ego is like a ninja. That's pretty tough.

24) How would you feel if Seven/Eight was canon?
Zelda/Elincia? Wow... I think I'd buy that game.

25) What would seven be doing if five was cooking?
What would Zelda do if Luna was cooking... is a question I have no idea how to answer.

]]> ~Rykua http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/25010212/ http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/25010212/ Fri, 29 May 2009 06:28:20 PDT


I essentially am going to have to sell the truck that dad left me. I thought that since my car is bashed up, I could buy the truck from him and make monthly payments. Nope, he wants it all and he wants it now. After being quiet and out of touch for me for... how long now?

He tells me this. So, I got about two weeks to sell a 2004 Ford Ranger Edge with 88,500 miles for about $5,500. Nice.
-----------------------
My mother's getting pretty... touchy... with me lately. Tempers are flaring between us, as usual. Except now, I just won't roll over and let her have her way. Honestly, does she think that I spend all my time on the computer chatting? No, I don't (usually because no one's on). I've been writing articles on Helium, desperately trying to make myself a few extra dollars of pocket money. That and I've been working on a novel that I should be starting soon. I've been doing a lot of planning into this thing and I hope to get it finished by the end of the summer.
-----------------------
I'm job hunting as well. I hope I get a job soon for the summer. I also hope that they leave either Tuesday or Thursday open...

Why?

Because I need at least ONE day a week to myself. On my days off, I'm going to go visit my friends, whether it's Jordan or Kris or Phil or Naro, since they're the closest. Well, "closest" in relative terms as Naro... well... she lives in NY and is about a three and a half hour drive away. I digress, though.

I need money badly and I'm doing everything I can to make some. I've been perfecting my music compositions, getting them ready for attempts at publication... I've been working on a novel... I've recently taken up art...

After seeing all the artwork that gets sold at AnimeBoston... I've decided that if I practice my butt off at art and really take it seriously, I can acquire a table at Artist's Alley at a con and make a bit of money. I was thinking about making my debut at Otakon because, well, it's one of the biggest cons on the east coast and it's only about two hours away from me.
--------------------------------
Also, lookie! I can still make planets in Photoshop!

[link]

They're not as good as I used to be able to, but heck, it's something! I'll perfect my planet-creation techniques and maybe sell a bit of graphic design artwork at the con.

I also wish Naro'd teach me how she colors things so friggin' well. I mean, just look at her gallery!

[link]

I wish I could color half as good as that... but with practice I shall. Practice makes perfect, after all.
-----------------------
People are nosy, I realize. I also realize I keep to myself on a lot of things. There's a lot of things that not even my best friends know about me. I keep a LOT of secrets and events to myself. I mean, yeah, relatively speaking... Naro, Jordan, Kris, and Phil know a LOT about me... but that's relatively speaking compared to everyone else.

What they and everyone else know about me... well... think of what Carl Sagan said about the blue dot...

[link]86BPM1GV8M

There's so much about me that is in the vast, cold, dark reaches of space... and that will always be kept secret and locked...
--------------------------
...

...

... so I realize my friends have a big influence in my life and the choices I make at times. The things Phil and Jordan and Naro and Aki and Lexi and Kris and Amber and Alex and John and Steve and a few others... the things they say have a profound influence on my life, I realize. Whether it's one person saying "two for one deal, man!" or another saying "dude, you're a great pianist" or another chastizing me for a mistake... I realize the things that are said to me make a profound impact on my life.

Sure, I may act like I shrug it off and act non-chalant, but it only takes one comment to sow the seeds of doubt into me, which is really bad... sometimes I trust my friends a bit too much that even if I go against their advice, it'll nag at me and eat at the back of my brain.
-----------------------------------
I just saw my friend's status on AIM just now and it got me thinking.

"The penalty for seeing nothing but good in others is to see nothing but evil in yourself."

I always see good in others, but I don't see it in myself. I always see my friend... ]]> ~Rykua http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/24646585/ http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/24646585/ Fri, 08 May 2009 05:31:41 PDT
Well, today's the day. May 8th, 2009. Today is the day that I change for the better. For the future.

Smiles and sunshines and Fresh Picked Daisies!
I'll smile and nod as you do what you please!

It's a new leaf.

Well, it's an old leaf revisited. An old leaf that I picked up from Carla.

Yesh, the Carla... the Carlitabug... teh Crispy.

^^... so no matter how upset or pissed I am, smiles all around. Because why darken everyone else's mood with my emo complaining and incessant rambling? If my smile, as real or as fake as it is, can brighten anyone's day... then I'll feel SO much better about myself.

So, smiles all around!



Anyone up for a toast of chardonay to celebrate the change? *smiles* ^^



And I can assure you, you won't know whether I'm upset or not. I've been acting all my life in one way or another. No matter what, I can even convince Phil and Jordan of my false sincerity if I want, and those two know me better than anyone else on this planet.

Maybe it's wrong to deceive people, but one has to realize that the needs of the many come before the needs of the few, or the one. Other people's needs, wants, and lives come first before mine. I'm happy if my friends are happy. That's always what I said.



Just don't expect a relationship with me, because it won't happen. I can assure you of that. I'm perfectly fine and happy with single. Just ask Jordan and Phil! I've done it for how long now? It's went straight from "hobby" to "full-time job" being single. ^^ so don't worry about me. Worry about yourselves, and let me help you if you need it.

~ John Michael Toth, aka Rykua

]]> ~Rykua http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/24458371/ http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/24458371/ Mon, 27 Apr 2009 07:12:58 PDT
I came back on DA to clear my messages and deviation list somewhat so when I return I won't be overwhelmed.

I've been gone, what... a month?

220 deviations and 140 messages. I've spent a while this morning clearing it out. Right now, 9 messages and 67 deviations. I'll finish the rest (and any new stuff) when I'm officially back.



I've been working a bit more on art lately. I think working in an art gallery has been rubbing off on me.

I think I'm going to do a meme and then get off.


I got a ton of schoolwork to do.

]]> ~Rykua http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/23376397/ http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/23376397/ Tue, 24 Feb 2009 06:21:45 PST -----------------------------------
I decided to steal an OC character survey from . Here we go!

Anywayz, first you pick 12 of your OCs and jot them down...not in any particular order, then answer the questions. Don't look at the questions before you write the names down, that sort of ruins the fun...I guess.



1. Flame (formerly King Sigfried vor Allem. He's somewhat of a pervert and loves flirting with a lot of girls people, but when it's time to get serious, he gets the job done...)

2. Celeste Torikana (Rykua's adoptive sister... she gives the strong appearance and attitude of a slut but just wishes to be loved and attended to like a normal person... also is a professional "escort" and is the person who makes the money for the group to pay for food and the house)

3. Karen Seymura (Liz's cousin and a chemistry and technology prodigy)

4. Rykua Torikana (former supervillainess elite, now dating a hero and is pregnant... and has given up fighting)

5. Liz Jones (Flame's ex girlfriend and a weapon's master)

6. Tsubaki Kazeonodera (Former goddess of power... was a nihilistic, cynical, fatalistic, misanthropic, pessimistic villainess who believed people were only good for destroying things and that they shouldn't care what they do because everyone eventually dies)

7. Miraison/Kate Forfreschire (Time traveler from the future. As a child prodigy and brilliant scientist, she was headstrong and pushy. An influence of her mind from a friend of hers had turned her evil. A horrible internal clash of her advanced technology with mystical, mysterious arts of arcane magic destroyed her sanity and her mind. Is now a mindless drone only bent upon killing, inflicting pain, and destroying anything she sees.)

8. Gabriella Sequillo (A dark mage of unknown origins, her personality, level of power, range of powers, her history... everything about her is wrapped up in a mysterious past that she never has an intention of disclosing. Similar to Miraison in personality, but she doesn't have the whole "death..." thing going on.)

9. Peter Perriot (A former puppeteer who broke his spinal cord in a horrible accident. His whole body is paralyzed. Made a deal with the devil to gain psychic powers. He can now control his body as a marionette would and can control the bodies of anyone who he overpowers or who wishes for him to control them. He is a brilliant, excellent strategist and a cunning warrior.)

10. John Toth (The character from Spellbinding Radiance [my Fire Emblem fic]. He is a fire mage who learned the three branches of anima magic, as well as dark magic. Has no talent for light magic, cannot take hits, and fights like a glass cannon. He is prone to going past his limits now and paying the consequences later. He's died twice so far.)

11. James McGregor (A genius of epic proportions. He knows virtually everything about anything. He is only outclassed by Karen in her fields of Technology and Chemistry and by Celeste in her fields of Biochemistry, Psychology, and Sociology)

12. Rufius (A dog. Seriously. He communicates through telekinesis or speaking [somehow]. He also is very insulting and sarcastic. He also used to jokingly make "animal abuse" comments to Kusami back when he insulted her and she kicked him with her boots. He manipulates the moon, the clouds in the sky, nature, time, space, and gravity.)




1. Who would make a better college professor, 6 (Tsubaki) or 11 (James)?
James. Easily. Tsubaki is a hateful fatalist who believes people should die.

2. Do you think 2 (Celeste) is hot? How hot?
*snort* She's supposed to be. She's a geeky girl with glasses who goes around wearing nothing but a corset, a miniskirt, and hooker boots. Other times, she wears a tight, form-fitting, black leather outfit. She may give the appearance and the facade of being a slutty whore, but in reality... she's insecure, constantly views her sister as the superior, and believes the only way to get attention is to use this facade and flaunt the only thing she can do better than her sister.

Insecurity's kinda hot... in a way.

3. 12 (Rufius) sends 8 (Gabriella) on a mission. What is it, and does it succeed?
Rufius'd send Gabriella to get dog food since a running gag for the past three or four years is that Flame always forgets to feed him.

4. What is or would be 9 (Peter)'s favorite book?
"Advanced puppeteering techniques"

5. Would it make more sense for 2 (Celeste) to swear fealty to 6 (Tsubaki), or the other way around?
Well... Cele... ]]> ~Rykua http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/23151388/ http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/23151388/ Thu, 12 Feb 2009 06:45:41 PST
Thusly, I've decided to cut some things loose. Some things are temporary; others are permanent.

I do not know if or when I'll return here. Perhaps during the summer; perhaps when I finally get my BA in Music Composition and Music Education.

Overall, though, I have found that I really need to focus on the more important things in life. If any of you are still interested in keeping in touch, there are a few ways.



MySpace:
[link]

E-Mail:
foxwolfjackson89@aim.com

FanFiction.net:
[link]

YouTube:
[link]



I think that's all of them. It's been fun here but now I bid my farewell. I'll still be on once in a while to check if I've been sent any notes or important messages/comments. Have no fear.

]]> ~Rykua http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/21909837/ http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/21909837/ Wed, 10 Dec 2008 05:46:04 PST
Well first of all, I think I should state something that people IRL most likely know about me. I'm a music fanatic/freak/obsessive/whatever the fuck you want to call it. I really don't want to sound like an ego-maniac but I'd like to say I'm pretty talented in music. Not really, really talented like Nobuo Uematsu or John Williams or Beethoven or Chopin or anyone else that's really well-known... but I'd like to think I have some talent.

I have a knack for picking up an instrument and in a month or two be able to play it well enough to be able to perform in a concert band or a jazz band with it. To date I'm able to play (to varying degrees): Piano, percussion (mallets, auxiliary, and drums [that are not named snare]), trumpet, trombone, euphonium/baritone, tuba, clarinet, violin... there are a few others, but they're escaping my mind.

Also, I compose and arrange music. Lately, I find my works are too square and in the box, but that's just a personal thought, but that's because I'm working by the rules now. I feel the best way to bend and break rules is to first get a grasp of them, and I plan on mastering the basics before I go any further. But I digress. One of my compositions, which will always be one of my favorites, was played by my high school band for concert, which I'm deathly proud of.

Also, according to a good friend of mine, I have the ability to pull through the roughest of times. I've been bombarded with weird, and often agonizingly treacherous situations that most people just look at me with amazement and pity (at my insanity at taking such a huge load on my back). Whereas most people would shrug their shoulders and let the problems walk all over them, I try my best to fight back and never let those problems win.

I also find that, in terms of books, I'm rather smart. Although I may lack in common sense and street smarts, I often find myself using my book smarts to keep up with the rest of society. My book smarts have gotten me to graduate sixth in my class with a GPA of about 4.081 (includes weighted classes such as Honors and AP).

Reason I didn't graduate higher is because I have a strong stubborn streak. Not necessarily good (or bad) about me, but I felt it had to be said. If something seems pointless or goes against what I stand for or believe in, I find myself very hard pressed to do it. This is why I've had so many conflicts in my English classes with my English teachers. I failed to see why for thirteen grades (twelve plus kindergarten) we were forced to learn basically the same stuff over and over and over. Improper parallel verb structure should be learned by, like, fourth grade. Ah, but I digress... my grammar freakishness is probably a bad trait and I shouldn't be harping on that in a positive blog.

My parents and my grandmother were hoping I'd go to MIT for computer programming. After being sent an invitational letter there and practically meeting the requirements to go there, I decided against it and ended up not doing the application. This earned me a LOT of lectures from parents about not doing the application. But, I'm stubborn and I like doing things my way; I couldn't afford that anyway. In addition, music's my passion... I didn't want to go to a computer college, have a change of heart, and get stuck in a college which has (from what I hear) a mediocre music program (although from what I hear, their individual music groups are good).

'sides, I got a full scholarship to my local community college. Anything up to fifteen credits is paid for in full, and if I choose to max out to eighteen credits, the other three credits are lowered in price to only... I believe $27 per credit. I don't even have to pay for that or books, because I have another scholarship and financial aid covering that. It's been a bit of a struggle sometimes, having to deal with parents bitch at you for not going to a high-level college, but I'm happy with my choice. I want to do what I enjoy rather than what's expected of me... I'm simply doing what's best for myself.

I also have perfected the art of true procrastination. There are seldom few people who can pull off last-minute works of art like I can. When I say “works of art”, I mean beautiful homework assignments. Because... procrastination is an art... and just like any other art... it must be practiced with skill in order to perform correctly.

Like, for example, in my Spring '08 semester, I had a research paper due for my Honors English 102 class. It was on the book “The... ]]> ~Rykua http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/20754026/ http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/20754026/ Tue, 30 Sep 2008 05:25:37 PDT
One of the people on my watch list. Signomi is quite a good artist, although I haven't seen her on as much lately. Personally, I like most of her artwork and gallery and I think you should definitely check out her gallery (and even put her on the watch list).
-----------------

MorriganBlack is a good friend of mine and an aspiring artist. She is really talented and you can tell from her gallery just how much improvement she had over her time here. If you have the resources, you should commission her for an artwork piece. You won't regret it. I promise. Pinky swear!
-----------------

Lokklyn is... well... you just have to look in her gallery and judge for yourself. She's trying to work on making her own style of artwork. Personally, I think it's working. Add her on your watch list if you'd like. Or, if you want, just head to Otakon one of these years and she'll probably be in the Artist Alley.
-----------------

Lingy-0. Someone I added to my watch list a while ago. This person's artwork is definitely beautiful and looks quite a bit like a painting on a canvas, in my opinion. Definitely someone you have to check out and comment.
-----------------

Yeah... Kimi. I don't even remember how I found her gallery to be honest, lol. Still, though. You should still check out her gallery. You never know what you may find... you may find something that you really like.
-----------------

... yes, a rather new person to DeviantArt. I found this profile because I recommended her to DA. There's definitely some great photography in the gallery that you have to check out and comment. Yesssss... comment.
-----------------

Well, uh, this is more if you're into the whole macabre and death type thing. Might not be appropriate for everyone (since everyone has different tastes), but I like a few of their pictures. If you like their stuff then just put 'em on your watch list.
-----------------

Because we all love Marth cosplayers... especially when they dress as my favorite costume from Melee... Marth in Sunday's Best.

Anyway, definitely check out the pictures of the cosplay and the artwork. That's something to look at.
-----------------
-----------------

Don't even joke around here. His gallery is pure, 100% his hard work. It may really look like the actual transformers, but damn it... it isn't. He does all his work in Blender (a 3D making program). If you have any spare time, you HAVE to check out his gallery. You will probably be as amazed as me as to how his gallery looks. Definitely.



And that is my Artist Pimpage for today... I haven't really gotten into everyone I wanted to, but... I sorta lost steam/motivation halfway into this and didn't want to lose what I had typed

]]> ~Rykua http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/20646946/ http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/20646946/ Wed, 24 Sep 2008 05:55:50 PDT who got it from who got it from and so on and so forth...
--------------------------
99 Questions

1) Name: John

2) Name Backwards: nhoJ

3) Were you named after anyone?: *shrugs*

4) Does your name mean anything?: Dunno.

5) Nick Name(s): Johnny T., Rykua, Flame... take your pic.

6) Screen Name(s): Rykua, FoxwolfJackson89... whatever.

7) Date of Birth: ... >.>... 3/09/1990

8) Place of Birth: Pittsburgh, PA (haha, but I don't live there anymore)

9) Nationality: Filipino, Hungarian, Italian... yes, that's right... I'm part asian.

10) Current Location: Upstairs.

11) Sign: The Middle Finger.

12) Religion: ...

13) Height: 5' 7"... ish?

14) Weight: 132...-ish?

15) Shoe Size: 10 1/2.

16) Hair colour: Dark, dark brown. Like, it's almost black.

17) Eye colour: ... brown?

18) What do you look like?: A person.

19) Innie or Outie?: wtf?

20) Righty, Lefty, both: Righty... although I can do a LITTLE with my left.

21) Gay, Straight, Bi, or Other?: Straight... like Robin Hood's arrows.

22) Best friends?: ... *shrug*

23) Best friend you trust the most: ... see previous question.

24) Best friends {your sex}: JD, PB, and KDW.

25) Best friends of the opposite sex: ... holy shit, that's too long of a list to put here. CC, CR, AM, KH, PB, SL, CB, Naro... etc.

26) Best Bud(s): wtf? Doesn't the last two questions give this justice?

27) Boyfriend / Girlfriend: Ahahaha... haha... ha... ha............. ha.................

... I don't have a boyfriend.

28) Crush: F*ck. You.

29) Parent(s): ... uh, yeah... I have them. Kinda hard to be born without 'em.

31) Favorite on-line Guy(s): Pandora and James... those two are awesomely hilarous.

32) Favorite on-line Girl(s): Narooooo! Just because... she actually understands me when I talk about stuff (online girl-wise). *EV trains his Rhyperior to have 252 Defense EV's*

That and she cosplayed as Marth in Sunday's Best, which was my Melee character. That alone deserves, like... 5,000 cool points and counting.

33) Funniest friend: Haha... Jordan?

34) Craziest friend: ... *snort* all of them are.

35) Advice Friend: There's more than one, y'know.

36) Loudest Friend: *would get shot for saying his name*

37) Person you cry with: Myself, durr!

Do You Have...

38) Any sisters: One older half-sister... I'm an uncle, yey.

39) Any brothers: One half-brother... who is part Japanese.

40) Any pets: *allergic*

41) A Disease: Asthma... allergies... need I name more reasons why I don't need cigarettes to screw my lungs over?

42) A Pager: wut?

43) A Personal phone line: Nope.

44) A Cell phone: That would be my personal phone line, lolsx.

45) A Lava lamp: I had three.

46) A Pool or hot tub: No.

47) A Car: Yeah. Pain in the fucking ass to maintain.

Describe Your...

48) Personality: ... I AM MY OWN UNIQUE INDIVIDUAL!

49) Driving: Sucks with these gas prices... *does about 450-ish miles a week assuming he doesn't take any side trips*

50) Car or one you want: Toyota Scion. 40+MPG, FOR THE F*CKING WIN!

51) Room: It's ...blue. .D <---- *agrees with Ashi*

52) What’s missing?: Food in my stomach. All money goes to gas.

53) School: Cumberland County College... and sorta Rowan University.

54) Bed: ...What the heck is there to say about my bed? Except for how comfortable it is <------- *agrees with Ashi*

55) Relationship with your parent(s): Haha, wut? None.

Do You

56) Believe in yourself: I BELEVE IN THE HEART OF THE CARDS, GAIZ!

57) Do you believe in love at first sight?: Blah.

58) Consider yourself a good listener: Sometimes...

60) Get Along with your parents: No.

61) Save your e-mail conversations:... ]]> ~Rykua http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/20434044/ http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/20434044/ Thu, 11 Sep 2008 05:56:08 PDT
Despite my already busy life, I'm seriously considering doing it. I have a feeling that will be a positive impact on my resume. I will be hating myself all this year (October until may) but in the future, I think it will benefit me.

After all, no pain, no gain.

Well, now it's off to Destinutos! Write a small summary of the first episode of the show, and do a small homework assignment.

]]> ~Rykua http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/20402564/ http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/20402564/ Tue, 09 Sep 2008 06:45:07 PDT
Since August 22nd, I've only used 60 anytime minutes. Since then, I've only used 103 night-and-weekend minutes. Since then, I've used 1,430 text messages.

Wait, WHAT?!

Yes, that's right.

One thousand.
Four-hundred.
Thirty.

Text messages... since August 22nd.

Thank god for unlimited texting. At twenty-five cents a text (I think), that would come out to... I don't even want to begin to think about it.

Ah, the joys of having a girlfriend who will text you even if she's sitting next to you on the bench in the mall. The joys of having mobile IM enabled.

It is wonderful.



I think I should think about knocking down my plan a couple steps to a lower amount of anytime minutes to save money, if there is a plan that'll let me do that.

]]> ~Rykua http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/20318631/ http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/20318631/ Thu, 04 Sep 2008 03:47:52 PDT
You may be like, "Are you f*cking serious?! You're busy as is."

If you notice, I have some space in between classes. I'm going to use those breaks to work on artwork. Normally, I use those breaks to work on my stories (Spellbinding Radiance, Dark Blaze, War in Piece), but I decided I'm going to actually try to do artwork.



... maybe if I get good enough I'll sell prints and do commissions (I do need the money... badly... FYI)? Maybe even start a webcomic? That's a long ways ahead, but it's worth a shot.



I just need do do something to make sure I'm not idle for one second. Idle time=wasted time now. Well, except early mornings from when I wake up. It's 6:44 AM... I went to bed around midnight and woke up at 6:30 AM. I don't know why, but ever since band camp, I've been getting up extremely early. It's good 'cause I get more personal time to myself in the morning, which I need.

It gives me time to work on spellbinding radiance, I guess. I really should be working on War in Piece and Dark Blaze more since they're original stories I want to publish. Oh well.

So, damn it, I'm sorry for letting my deviation list go back to, like... July/August? If there's something you REALLY want me to check out, just leave me a comment in this journal. I'm gonna clear out my list completely... again.

I kinda realized I left myself no time for music composition/arrangement. Oh well. Maybe sunday afternoons, I can grind out some kind of music.



Oh, and if you want to add me on MySpace or Facebook... just note me. I'm a pretty boring person, though... (although a lot of people will beg to differ).



EDIT: My phone's background on my sub LCD screen (when the phone is closed) is a picture of my wonderful Gengar (named "5+5=10") battling a wild Steelix. My background is a picture of my Salamence (named "5!=120" [that stands for 5 factorial {it means 5x4x3x2x1}]) battling Bertha's Hippowdon.

]]> ~Rykua http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/20264534/ http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/20264534/ Mon, 01 Sep 2008 04:07:08 PDT -----------------------
Cumberland County College Jazz Band and Wind Symphony (takes precedence over high school band schedule):

-September 5th: Wind Symphony at the mall at 7:30 PM.
-September 18th: Jazz Band at Elwyn at 6:00 PM.
-October 3rd: Jazz Band at the Mall at 7:30 PM.
-October 11th: Mullica Hill Festival (Jazz Band and Wind Symphony) at 11 AM. -lunch included-
-November 21st: Mall Concert (Wind Symphony and Jazz Band) at 7:30 PM.
-December 7th: Campus Holiday Concert at 3:00 PM.
-December 12th: Mall Holiday Concert (both bands) at 7:30 PM.
-----------------------
Bridgeton High School Marching Band (hey, I feel like following them around and trying to help them out... practice for when I become an actual director):

-August 25-29: Mandatory Band Camp (8 AM-4:30 PM)
-August 29: Family Picnic and Field Show presentation (5 PM)
-September 13: St. Joe Football Game-Away (12 Noon) and West Deptford High School Competition (7 PM)
September 19: St. Augustine Football Game-Home (7 PM)
-September 20: Pennsville Memorial HS Competition (7 PM)
-September 26: Buena Football Game-Away (7 PM)
-September 27: Cumberland Regional HS Competition (7 PM)
-October 3: Lower Cape May Football Game-Home (7 PM)
-October 4: Mount Peasant Competition-Delaware (TBA)
-October 10: Highland Football Game-Home (7 PM)
-October 11th: Rosehayn Harvest Festival Parade (TBA) and Millville HS Competition (7 PM).
-October 17: Pleasantville Football Game (7 PM)
-October 18: Bridgeton HS Home Competition (7 PM)
-October 24: Holy Spirit Football Game-Away (7 PM)
-October 31: Springfield Twp. (PA) Football Game-Away (7 PM)
-November 7: Middle Twp. Football Game-Away (7 PM)

-Assuming we make playoffs, which I highly doubt, this will be the marching season.

-November 29: Vineland Christmas Parade
-November 30: Bridgeton Christmas Parade
-----------------------
College Classes Schedule:

Monday:
U.S. History I (Curcio): 12:30 PM-1:52 PM
Effective Speech (Gouse): 3:30 PM-4:52 PM
Sight Singing (Anderson): 6:00 PM-6:52 PM

Tuesday:
Prin Economics I (Bloom): 11:00 AM-12:52 PM
Music History (Anderson): 2:00 PM-3:22 PM
Elementary Spanish (Arrigo): 5:00 PM-6:22 PM
-Concert Choir (Canna): 7:00 PM-8:52 PM (not credited)

Wednesday:
U.S. History I (Curcio): 12:30 PM-1:52 PM
Effective Speech (Gouse): 3:30 PM-4:52 PM
Sight Singing (Anderson): 6:00 PM-6:52 PM
-Jazz Band (Akinskas): 6:00 PM-6:52 PM (not credited... only when there is no Sight Singing class)
-Concert Band (Akinskas): 7:00 PM-8:52 PM (not credited)

Thursday:
Prin Economics I (Bloom): 11:00 AM-12:52 PM
Music History (Anderson): 2:00 PM-3:22 PM
Elementary Spanish (Arrigo): 5:00 PM-6:22 PM
-----------------------
Unfortunately, due to lack of time, I can't audition for either Hourglass Cafe OR The Crucible. Practices for both are as follows:

Hourglass Cafe:
"Actors will be asked to read sides from the script & sing 32 bars of a song
of your choosing."
"Production date is October 29 and rehearses
most Wednesday and Sunday evenings beginning September 7. Ages 16+"

The Crucible:
"Casting ages 16+. Sides will be provided for audition readings or you may
use your own dramatic monologue. Production dates are November 21, 22, 23.
Rehearses M,T & TH evenings beginning September 15."



Sorry Deb... I want to do it, but my schedule's already full. I'll aim for the spring semester's musical though!

]]> ~Rykua http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/20050134/ http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/20050134/ Fri, 22 Aug 2008 06:11:05 PDT
But you have to copy & paste this into your own Journal.

EDIT: Okay, it took me a WHILE but I found out how to edit Journal Entries. Sorry it took so long, haha.
------------------
First person to be featured.



First:
[link]

A lovely cosplay picture. I could be a bit biased since the Sunday's Best Marth WAS my Melee character (as those who've played me in that game know). Great costume, and I like the flowers on the bottom, haha.

Second:
[link]

A very good drawing. The expression in the picture and the effort that our lovely featured artist put in is phenomenal. Good job!

Third:
[link]

I searched. I saw. I lulzed. That's all I can say. That pic just had me going "xD!".
------------------
Second person to be featured.



First:
[link]

MS Paint, MS Paint... how do you color in MS Paint? It's amazing. I love this picture. The effort really shows and pays off. Congratulations!

Second:
[link]

Teen Titans! Beast Boy and Starfire... in a puppet battle. I just love how the expressions on their puppets' faces match their owners, haha. That was hilarious.

Third:
[link]

Windwaker rendition! Haha, awesomeness! Well, that's all that really comes to mind about this pic. Wind-waker is ALWAYS a nice style to experiement in, and it's cool to see you tried it at least.
------------------
Second person to be featured.



First:
[link]

South Jersey DOES have its moments of beauty. Yes, it does. I love it!

Second:
[link]

Red! It's so warm-colored and tempermental... if that's the best way to describe it. It does look like a tornado in the distance, though.

Third:
[link]

Ohhh, yes, this picture. It's like staring down an endless path, except it's like a river. The flow of time, haha... *dork*

Anyway, loved that one.
-----------------
Spots for two more artists! Who will it be? Stay tuned, comment, and find out!

]]> ~Rykua http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/19247250/ http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/19247250/ Mon, 07 Jul 2008 04:08:16 PDT
1. I am a nerd. Through and through. I can play almost any instrument in the marching band (damn you flutes! damn you! why are you so hard to get a sound?!). I compose music. I'm a DA user. I have an FF.net account. I'm part of the Cumberland County Community Jazz Band as well as the Concert Band. I sing in the CCC Choir. I'm in CCC's summer musical production (High School Musical). I can play a bit of violin.

I spent my last four years using my classically trained piano skills to play video game music.

2. I have a MySpace. I'm not ashamed to admit it. Go on, all the 4Chan peeps. Go and say something smart.

3. I haven't written a chapter in my novels in over three years.

4. I want to learn how to speek Greek, Latin, Russian, and Japanese.

5. I've been to Canada, Japan, Philippines, and Italy.

6. I am the biggest procrastinator that I know. Still am, despite being a college student.

7. I'm eighteen, going into my second year of college. Yes, I skipped a grade as a kid. As I said in #1... NEEEEEEEEEEERD!

8. I enjoy the single life to the point that I almost always prefer it to the relationship life. I can't settle down. It's not my style. I love constantly moving. I love constantly pushing my limits and becoming better than I am. Whenever I get into a relationship, I always feel like I'm slowing down or settling down just for the girl. I can't do that. I have to constantly be doing something new and exploring new territories and making myself the best I can be.

9. I LOVE Role-Playing, and I do it a LOT on AIM.

10. I'm guilty... I'm a HUGE fan of Kira from Death Note. L can go f*ck himself, because Kira IS justice... a bit radical, but someone has to initiate change in a world as corrupt as ours.

11. I still play Pokemon (the games)... and until a month or so ago, I used to play Yugioh (the card game).

12. I was raised Catholic... was baptized and confirmed. I'm agnostic/atheist now.

13. My personality is defined by my free will. I live life mostly off my whims. If I have the sudden urge to do something, I'll do it... without fear or hesitation. Because of that, I'm INCREDIBLY random and unpredictable. I can be silent and shy, and all of a sudden, I'll be talkative and crack jokes. I'm always spontaneous... and if you can figure out my personality... well...

Artemis Fowl would be proud that you cracked the Eternity Code.

14. I didn't like Cowboy Bebop... though I only saw the first two or three episodes.

15. Yes, I'm a bit of an attention whore.

16. ... I can't think of anything else to put here. Uh... my trombone mouthpiece is a 12E, although I use a Bach Megatone with a DEEP cup when I play 4th trombone for Jazz Band. My trumpet mouthpiece used to be a 1C before I switched to a Yamaha 14A4a. I love it. I also OWN my own trumpet and trombone... both of them "silver". I also own a guitar, a keyboard, and a piano back at my old house.



I taaaaaaaag:


]]> ~Rykua http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/19198697/ http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/19198697/ Fri, 04 Jul 2008 08:51:44 PDT
Well, anyway, I got this to put in my journal... because it's awesome, and I'm putting it up. Don't argue with that logic! It's as infallible as... uh... hm...

It's just infallible.

So, just... like, leave a comment and I'll reply with this survey thing.

Gogogo, anyone who watches this journal!
-------------------------------
A) Tell you why I friended/talk to you

B) Associate you with something - fandom, a song, a color, a photo, etc.

C) Tell you something I like about you

D) Tell you a memory I have of you

E) Ask something I've always wanted to
know about you

F) Tell you my favorite user pic of yours

G) In return, you must post this in your
journal

]]> ~Rykua http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/18928866/ http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/18928866/ Thu, 19 Jun 2008 11:43:08 PDT
After a ton of browsing through pictures, and a ton of comments left... I've got it down to 19.

No more art for me today! Please. I don't care if it's a perfect 3D picture of my entire role-play crew with a kick-ass background.

If I didn't comment your art, chances are I either: A) Didn't see it yet -or- B) Didn't know how to comment it.

Also, I went through about six of the 20-ish journal entries that I have to go through.

I'm catching up! I'M CATCHING UP!



... but I'll be gone to AnimeNext for the next few days. Ooh, anime convention! Y3Y!

]]> ~Rykua http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/17954634/ http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/17954634/ Mon, 21 Apr 2008 06:48:51 PDT
After the semester is over, though, I probably won't return. I need to spend more time with the people I know IRL... whom I've barely talked to and hung out with since I moved.

I really do need to set my priorities straight.

I may be back... I may not. When online friends affect your choices and life more than IRL ones, you KNOW there's something wrong. I bid all of you farewell.

I'll try to pop by on occasion, though, and check out some of your artwork. It's the least I can do... haha, I've had some of you on my watch list FOREVER.

]]> ~Rykua http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/17882429/ http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/17882429/ Wed, 16 Apr 2008 15:02:49 PDT 2. Post 8 random facts about yourself in your dA journal.
3. At the end of your post, tag 8 more people to learn some random things about.
4. Go to their page and leave a comment telling them they're tagged.

1. I wasn't tagged by this. The person who posted this didn't tag people, but if we wanted to do it, just say we were inspired. So, I was inspired by kimicatdemon
2. I still don't know how to make those clickable icons, and I've been here since '05-ish. ;_;
3. My favorite anime is Onegai Teacher
4. As I get older IRL, I tend to act more and more immature. I used to be 13 and people'd think I was 17-18... now people think I'm 14-15.
5. I'm so tempted to corrupt my self-insertion fanfic, which I work VERY hard on trying not to make it a Marty Stu fanwank, with an orgy of my character and all the girls.
6. I'm 18.
7. I got skipped up a grade... hence why I was a college student at seventeen.
8. I have a crush on someone... despite my constant protests that I don't have one. However, I shall NEVER tell who it is. I CAN say that she isn't in my college.

]]> ~Rykua http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/17099293/ http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/17099293/ Thu, 28 Feb 2008 07:41:29 PST
1- Write again those rules.
2- Each person tagged have to write 8 things about herself/himself.
3- He/she has to write those things into her/him journal.
4- He/she will have to tag 8 more people at the end.
5- Go into their dA page and notice that you've tagged them.


1- I admit that my favorite Naruto pairing is not Naruto/Hinata, but Naruto/Ayame.
2- I admit that I like writing stories better than I like writing music.
3- I DO have an obsession with chocolate... a very deeply rooted obsession witih chocoate. My greatest, though, is double-stuf Oreos with Milk.
4- I prefer to RP as female characters.
5- I like the color pink... it's my fourth favorite color (preferrably hot pink). Order is: Black, blood red, lime green, hot pink.
6- I have an overactive and uncontrollable imagination. Careful what you say around me and don't leave anything vague, or else I can easily come up with a HORRIBLE SLEW of things that are probably worse/more perverted than what really happened.
7- Yeah, I'm a perv at times. We all are. I, however, unlike most people, know when to control myself and be serious... and to know when there's a time for jokes and a time to be serious. I can be joking, perverted, and flirtatious... but when it comes down to it, I will put all that aside and be serious if needed.
8- ....... back in my junior year (in my defense, I was only 15 at the time!), I used to play Neopets with the girl I was going out with during that time.



... since I'm in a good mood, I won't tag anyone, xD!

]]> ~Rykua http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/16195792/ http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/16195792/ Mon, 31 Dec 2007 22:33:41 PST ~*~*~*~*
Rykua has 519 pageviews total and his 9 deviations were viewed 299 times. He watches 28 people, while 11 people watch him.

Overall, his deviations received 9 comments and were added to deviants' favourites 1 times, while he commented 361 times, making about 0.44 comments per day since he joined DA. This means that he gave 401 comments for every 10 that he received.

His deviation with the most comments is My Desktop with a pseudo-dock with 5 comments, while his most favourited one is Macabre Signature, with 1 favourites. His most viewed deviation is Macabre Signature with 116 views.

1 favourite was given for every 10 comments.

Every 90.6 days he uploads a new deviation, and it's usually on a Thursday, with 4 (44%) of his deviations.

His busiest month was January 2007 with 3 (33%) of his deviations.

The majority of his deviations are uploaded to the Digital Art gallery (6), while his favourite category was Miscellaneous > Abstract with 3 deviations.

Comments per deviation: 1
Favourites per deviation: 0.11
Views per deviation: 33.22
Comments per day: 0.01
Favourites per day: 0
Views per day: 0.36
Pageviews per day: 0.63
~*~*~*~*
Pretty... sad... ain't it?

]]> ~Rykua http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/16010107/ http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/16010107/ Thu, 20 Dec 2007 05:37:57 PST
]]> ~Rykua http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/15965595/ http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/15965595/ Sun, 16 Dec 2007 20:51:39 PST

Dead serious. Just got finished taking the 8th Calculus quiz for my class online. Computer problems kept me from taking them on time... so now I have a backlog of quizzes: 4, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, and 12.

Then I got the final tomorrow... which I kinda don't remember any of the material anymore.

FUCKER! I hate this shit. Fuck all this. Go to hell. I hate math.



UGH! I can't even write music or stories anymore, because I've been SO fucking stressed up.

Yes, I'm swearing my ass off, because that's how upset I am.

]]> ~Rykua http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/15813445/ http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/15813445/ Wed, 05 Dec 2007 20:00:47 PST
I honestly don't know what's worse. Not having emotions and not being able to be sympathetic to others... or having emotions but to be depressed beyond all means all the time.

Neither appeals to me, but I find I'm switched between one and another a lot.

]]> ~Rykua http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/15670856/ http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/15670856/ Sun, 25 Nov 2007 19:58:40 PST


My grades in Calculus currently are at about a C minus, if I'm lucky, and is steadily spiraling downward. My Computer Programming class is probably a C right now. Those are my two highest weighted classes right now. Even assuming I get straight 100's in both of my classes from now to the end of the semester, it's highly unlikely that their grades will be brought up enough for my average to be high enough to maintain scholarship.

Yes, you heard right. I'm probably losing my scholarship, all because I took courses in a major I didn't even want to pursue. Yes, that's right... I didn't want Computer Programming. I wanted nothing to do with it. My parents kept on pushing me and shoving me and telling me that was the ONLY thing I'd be good at that I would be successful in. That if I went to college for music, I'd simply be living a life of poverty and need and I wouldn't make any money at all. Yeah, hearing that constantly for two or three years will gradually let it sink into your head. Now I'm knee-deep in shit and about to be pulled down into a quicksand pit with no way out.



I'm broke as a motherfucker right now. I'm probably gonna give up my car and my cellphone, because I can't afford car insurance and I can't afford my cellphone. I can't afford anything right now. I can't even afford Christmas presents for people who have been giving to me almost every year. I feel like a mooching son of a bitch that some people have been giving all the time, and I can't give anything back. I owe people money, which is really a bad feeling. Gas prices are at an all-time high, and I've basically resorted to not driving unless ABSOLUTELY NECESSARY.



I have no urge to write anymore. My fanfiction, my novels, my poetry... I have no more urge to write anymore. I have no urge to work on my music compositions. I have no urge to draw. I have no urge to practice music anymore. As much as I hate to admit it, I've fallen into a pathetic state of apathy. I have no motivation or will to do anything anymore. As much as I used to bitch and complain that other people are giving up... now I'm doing the same. Am I wrong? I tried my very best to keep up, but it just wasn't working. I changed my major to Music, but is it too late? If I lose my scholarship, I might as well as kiss those classes goodbye. I see no way out.



I keep on getting into fights with my mom... my dad isn't fighting with me as much anymore, but that's because we talk, like, once or twice a month.



I know this also may sound strange, but I really can't feel anything anymore... emotionally that is. I mean, there have been a LOT of bad things happening to people I know lately, and as much as I try, I can't feel sympathetic anymore. I feel no sympathy, no hatred, no love, and no care anymore. The only things that fill my mind are confusion and paranoia. I don't even feel the hatred to hate the people that had wronged me numerous times before. It's pointless to hold those grudges... they take up my energy, which I have little of anymore, and waste my brain space.



There's so much more going on, but I think I've wasted enough of your time with my emo blog/journal entry.

]]> ~Rykua http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/15616727/ http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/15616727/ Thu, 22 Nov 2007 07:56:11 PST
PEIN.
[ ] Do you have ginger hair?
[ ] Do you have at least one piercing?
[ ] Do you change what you look like every so often?
[ ] Do you enjoy making people suffer?
[X] Do you have at least two pets?
Total: 1

KONAN.
[ ] Do you / have you ever had blue hair?
[x] Do you enjoy origami?
[ ] Do you think of yourself as an angel?
[ ] Do you wear decorations in your hair?
[ ] Do you wear coloured eyeshadow?
Total: 1

SASORI.
[ ] Do you like puppets?
[ ] Do you look younger than you are?
[ ] Do you / have you ever had red hair?
[ ] Do you hide behind a tough exterior?
[x] Is your heart the weakest part of you?
Total: 1

DEIDARA.
[x] Do you like birds?
[x (I did like doing those clay pots for Art)] Do you like sculpting?
[x (well, music-wise at lesat... it's the performing arts, dammit!)] Do you think you're very good at art?
[x] Do people often say different?
[... lol] Do you have a ridiculously long fringe?
Total: 4

KISAME.
[X] Do you like fish?
[ ] Do you have an odd shade of skin?
[ ] Is there something wrong with your teeth?
[ ] Your eyebrows are hard to see / aren't there.
[X] You like to do things the fast and easy way.
Total: 2

ZETSU.
[ ] Are you schizophrenic?
[X] Do you have mood swings?
[ ] Do you like plants?
[x] -- Venus flytraps?
[ ] You have an eye problem.
Total: 2

TOBI.
[ ] Are you a good boy?
[x] Ever had an extremely violent mood swing?
[... wtf does this have to do with Tobi?!)] Do you like Lollipops?
[ ] Ever been in a crushing situation?
[ ] Ever been so obsessed with this one person?
Total: 1

ITACHI.
[ ] Do you like to torture?
[ ] Do you have homicidal siblings?
[ ] Ever wanted to kill your whole family?
[x] Do you come across as moody and evil?
[x] Do you spend too much time alone?
Total: 2

HIDAN.
[ ] Are you religious?
[ ] Do you wear necklaces?
[ ] Have you ever self harmed?
[ ] You whine a lot.
[ ] You have funny colored eyes.
Total: 0

KAKUZU.
[ ] Do you have a money fetish?
[ ] Do you like sewing?
[ ] Do you like to cover your hair or mouth?
[x] You're greedy?
[ ] You're a secret ballerina!
Total: 1

]]> ~Rykua http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/15588033/ http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/15588033/ Tue, 20 Nov 2007 09:57:50 PST
[x] Said "Got it Memorized?" in a normal conversation?

[x] Said "As if!" in a normal conversation?


[x] Put your hair up like your favorite character? (To the best of your ability.)

[x (School musical, too)] Had a "sword fight" with your friend?

[xxxxxxxx] Wished that you owned a cosplay outfit?
Org. XIII coat and a Harry Potter cloak. XD

[x... I'm a band geek who plays 85% of the instruments available.] Gotten obsessed with something like fire (Axel), instruments (Demyx), books (Zexion), etc?

[ ] Memorized every member, their element, "code names" and weapon in order? ("Code names" are like, "Superior", "Freeshooter", etc.)

[x] Role played?

[x... even if we don't count RP characters, lol] Wanted to dye your hair the same color as your favorite character?

[ ] Heard someone say a number I through XIII, and immediately thought about the Organization member that has that number?

[] Wished you were a Nobody?

[] Wished you were a Heartless?

[] Done the 1000 Heartless battle without using any reaction commands?

[x] Been careful about using the word "Nobody"? ("Nobody" can defeat me!)

[] Gotten the Ultima Weapon?

[] Completely finished the journal?

[x] Refused to believe that Organization XIII has actually faded?

[I haven't played ANY KH game, xD! So, no.] Played Re:Chain of Memories, FM+, etc?

Anyone can do this if they want. But it IS a bit centered on KH and KHII, so be warned, those of you who don't play or haven't played them yet.

]]> ~Rykua http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/15543850/ http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/15543850/ Sat, 17 Nov 2007 06:33:46 PST
Please, please, please, don't fret! I'm working on it. College isn't too easy, LOL!

For those of you that don't know what I'm talking about, let me link to the original:
[link]

Yes, I'm aware that I didn't do too well on Fatalize, rushing it quite a bit... I forget how to play Liberi Fatali, to be honest (must... re-memorize)... One-Winged Angel is as good as it was on the video, although I have made some slight modifications to it since I performed it for video... Hyrule Temple is my addiction song, it's like my video game fix when I'm at the piano practicing a classical song and I want a quickie from video games to fix the mood, so yeah, I still got that strong... Zelda 1 intro/Overworld is doing okay, but I'm thinking of re-doing it with a trumpet (while playing piano accompaniment... yeah a muse that's been haunting my mind for a while... I'll attempt it when I get my 14A4a mouthpiece back)... I never completely memorized FF6's boss theme, which is one of the two pieces you see on the piano (decisive battle, was it?)... the next song, I forget the title from it, but I know it's from FF6 and that's the only other sheet music that's on the piano... FF6's battle theme, I still have memorized, although I'm STILL a bit shoddy at the end... the Zelda Game Over theme is the only one I learned by ear and not by sheet music... consequently it's also the only one that sounds all simple and oh goodness, I really do need to fix that ostinato in the right hand eventually...

... and Terra's theme (aka Tina's theme to some) is the only song here that's in the second medley, although I MAY be tempted to put in One-Winged Angel next to Dancing Mad............. anyway, Terra's theme is near the end... second to last, with Celes's theme (from FF6 as well) being the last song. I won't spoil much more, but I just would like to say, I'm still mirthlessly working hard at it when I'm not writing my fanfics or my novel or doing the occasional doodle... or composing something.

Man, who needs a social life when I got a creative output such as mine(?). Eh... bleh.

]]> ~Rykua http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/15529913/ http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/15529913/ Fri, 16 Nov 2007 06:09:52 PST
Yeah, I'm in college, but I tagged along, because I wanted to see how the football team was doing (much as I bitched about losing my social life in marching band, I find myself missing it). I even brought my trombone and played along in the stands. I just read over the shoulder of the baritone, and transposed his music (baritone T.C.) to trombone.

Anyway, yeah... it was about a 2 hour drive to Manesquan (sp?). That's, like, near Six Flags, but further east-ish.

Originally my plan was, after the game I was going to visit Jordan. But the game ended around 4 PM, and I realized that I really should be heading home if I wanted to get home within a reasonable sleeping hour.



Well, see, what had happened was... the buses left the school in the opposite direction that we came from, and since I was parallel parked, I had to make a K-turn. I tried to catch up to the buses, but I got caught behind some slow cars and subsequently a red-light. I was lost in the area. I turned randomly and I hit the Garden State Parkway. I figured I could follow that south and end up near home.

Well, life doesn't work like that. I somehow accidentally went north without realizing it. It wasn't until about a few minutes later that I saw, "New York"... and I was like, "... uh, this isn't the right way..."

So, I called my friend Jordan, and he got the Map Quest directions. Luckily, I remembered that Garden State Parkway was part of the route to his house anyway.

So, about an hour or so later, I ended up near his area. I made a fatal error in my turns though, and ended up... in Patterson. Yes, for those of you who don't know, Patterson is about as bad as Camden or Philadelphia...

Really bad place to be.

Luckily, I found my way to his house. I even have pictures. You can check my MySpace for them at this link:
[link]

Anyway, yeah. Eventful trip. Took the turnpike home and was driving 80-90 MPH, 'cause if I went any slower, I swore those cars tailgating me would've rear-ended me.

]]> ~Rykua http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/15398131/ http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/15398131/ Tue, 06 Nov 2007 20:20:50 PST
Damn it! I'm really falling through. I need to catch up soon.

Anyway, aside from school completely dominating my life, I haven't really done anything much lately. My social life is gone, my personal life is gone... my relationship life never even had a chance...

Oh well, xD!

I'm trudging through classes. Hopefully things will get better.

]]> ~Rykua http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/15030421/ http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/15030421/ Fri, 12 Oct 2007 14:28:18 PDT
Today, I'm sick again. Lol, I'm so used to being sick once a week that I thought it was suspicious that I wasn't sick last week.

God damn, major fucking headache and body aches... I'm constantly sick.

Oh well, that's my life... that's why I can't go out for sports or anything... it's not just because of my severe allergies, or acute asthma... it's also because of my constant sickness.



In other news, I got a lot of work to do for school. Do a Calculus quiz, do a narrative essay, read chapter 4 of Programming with Alice, try to find a suitable concert to go to for Music Appreciation class... not to mention my driver's test is this Monday... I hope I pass.

Ugh, normally, I'd be miserable, but I've already come to terms with the fact I'm sick a LOT. I've also come to terms with the fact I can't repress the fact I like people. Sorry Carla... I can't be like you.

So, in other news... not much is going on. I was being my usual whore-ish self last Sunday at the Harvest Festival. Lol, flirting and playing around is a lot more fun when the girls seem to enjoy it.



I need to get back into writing... and drawing... I've been focusing so much on music and stuff lately that I fear I'm becoming rusty in my other stuff. I haven't written since early August... I haven't drawn anything (aside from the Rykua attempt) since... July?

I'll start again... when I'm not as sick anymore.

Although, I still am working on that remix of a certain theme from Ocarina of Time for OCRemix. Lol, I still love that owl's theme... I think it's sooo cool, xD!

I wonder if I should finally get Distant Sunset published and copyrighted yet.

]]> ~Rykua http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/15012159/ http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/15012159/ Thu, 11 Oct 2007 08:40:24 PDT
Lol, I nearly forgot to tell my English 101 teacher that I would be possibly absent on Monday.

Lol, I can see him now.

"Buehler? Buehler? Buehler?"

LOL! Anyway, yeah, driving test. I HOPE I can pass. I'd love to get my licence. LOL! I wonder what I'll do when I get my license. Maybe just drive to my heart's content... not that much, 'cause gas is a bitch!

Maybe drive to a few band competitions? I know the High School band is doing some kind of state competition or something (hopefully they do well, being a size of about 20-ish).

Well, aside from that, nothing much happened. I was being my usual whore-ish self at the Harvest Festival, but everyone calls me a whore, anyway. ... not my fault the girls love me, haha.

]]> ~Rykua http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/14888536/ http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/14888536/ Tue, 02 Oct 2007 17:02:00 PDT
I love drawing and I love writing stories. I'm not exactly that great with either, but I try to practice with both. However, because of college, I find it hard to be able to practice on both.

I don't know which path I want to take either. I'm deadsplit. If I continue with writing, I want to be able to complete the novels I have planned. If I decide to go with drawing, I want to adapt the novel's storyline into webcomic form and make a webcomic.

It's getting to be really troublesome for me to do both, especially since I got my music stuff and my computer programming stuff already on-hand. I also have my graphic designs stuff on my ass all the time. Normally, I'd just quit doing graphic designs (Photoshop, In-Design, Illustrator, Quark, etc.) since that seems to be my weakness, but since I have a class in it, it seems rather pointless to quit now.



Bleh. I dunno.

]]> ~Rykua http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/14609310/ http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/14609310/ Wed, 12 Sep 2007 20:08:53 PDT


LIST 8 WEIRD FACTS ABOUT YOURSELF, THEN TAG 8 PEOPLE.

1. I'm officially in love with college.
2. I've skipped a grade when I was younger (so, yes, I'm still 17).
3. I can play Trumpet/Baritone/Trombone/Tuba, piano, clarinet, mallets (mainly vibraphone and xylophone) single stick, and percussion (bass drum, cymbals, and a little of snare and quads).
4. I've had a music composition of mine performed by the highschool band for my final concert.
5. My favorite animes of all time are: Death Note, Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya, Naruto, Onegai Teacher, and Trigun.
6. Until my current relationship, I've never had a relationship last more than a month or had one that was online (this one recently broke the three-month barrier and technically is the first online one I've had).
7. I'm wearing my high school band jacket right now, despite being graduated.
8. I'm amused by the fact I have a stalker, which I think probably pissed her off.



And I guess I'm supposed to tag 8 people, but, I dunno how to do it. Consider yourselves lucky that you're spared of my wrath due to... technical difficulties.

]]> ~Rykua http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/14567828/ http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/14567828/ Sun, 09 Sep 2007 20:41:39 PDT ~*~*~*~*
FieryParallax37 (7:22:47 PM): Arr, join my pirate screw!
~*~*~*~*
supRsonik217 (7:23:20 PM): three's a crowd
FieryParallax37 (7:23:24 PM): If three's a crowd, what's 7?
supRsonik217 (7:23:52 PM): a party
FieryParallax37 (7:23:46 PM): Then you're invited!
~*~*~*~*
supRsonik217 (7:27:20 PM): did you smoke crack or something? your jumpyer than jet when you mention boobies
supRsonik217 (7:27:26 PM): Jet: WHAT!? BOOBIES!? WHERE!?
------------------------------------------------------------------------
Now for the serious part of the blog. Drama sucks. Drama between friends suck. Drama in high school sucks. Drama in relationships suck.

Thank goodness I'm in love with the best girl there ever was. She went from Kya-sama, to Kya-chan, to Kya, to Biscuit-chan. Mmm... I love her.



Normally, I'd even be saying to myself, "You're too young. You don't know what love is. Geez, you're only seventeen!"

But, the thing is, this feels different. When I'm not on the phone with her, I think about her a lot... and sometimes I get a bit depressed when we don't talk. When she gets busy, I try to keep myself busy to not think about her. When I was gone for a month in Italy, all I could really think about was her.

Just being on the phone with her or having an IM convo with her just takes away my sadness and depression. No matter how hard or how bad the situation is, just talking to her on AIM or phone is enough to take away my troubles temporarily and bring a smile to my face. Even if it is silent, the fact that she's there is enough to cheer me up.

It's weird. I don't want anything back... I don't care about what happens to me, as long as she's happy. It strongly reminds me of a sermon the church pastor gave about the three types of love. There's one love, where you love someone because you want something from them. There's another love, which is based on sex. There's a third love... which is true love... love from which knows no bounds... love that you don't give out... it is love that you become, and spread out to others. You become the embodiment of love and just being around the right person will spread it and make them truly happy.

Maybe this is what love is. Maybe I'm fooling myself. I don't know. I truly have never felt like this about anyone before. I've always considered myself independent, not needing another person to validate my existence or make me happy. Now, here I am... depending solely upon a person... a person who, like me, was independent before, but has found herself slowly becoming more dependent with me, from what I hear.



Is this what it is or is it something else? I'm confused, but if this is what love is, I want it to continue. I feel so happy... so cheered up... like there's no more worries... when I'm around her. I don't want to lose that. Heh... maybe it is love. I hope it is...

Lol, looks like I came kinda far from my first relationship, back in 10th grade. Heh, I was a young kid back then... full of wonder and innocence... hell, I was only fourteen, xD!

]]> ~Rykua http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/14372870/ http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/14372870/ Mon, 27 Aug 2007 22:47:19 PDT
I'm still falling for the best girl that there is. My dear biscuit-chan, what can I say to express myself? We talk enough on the phone and IM. I think that's descriptive enough. The sad and depressing and dissapointing point is I'm an immature amateur, and I'm afraid to hurtfully harm this great girl by an accidental action. I'm afraid that I'll hurt her with immature inexperience and juvenile jackassery caused by my amateur assholery. I'm severely scared that I'll sorely screw up and fearfully frighten this heavenly happiness abruptly away. Verily, life's voracious vengeance of a very vivid vendetta is harmfully horrifying my haunted house of hideous, humble hellishness housing an inadequate, immature, inexperienced intelligence.

... but should I ask for help? Do I come off as some immature person for pestering a poor person with a premise of primitively prying my potheaded personality away from pissy pessimism? Do I learn by living a life like a lecherous larva, constantly leeching help from others?

*sighs* I'm confused. I've been cursed with a blessing and blessed with a curse. I've been bestowed a miraculous pit and fallen into a pitfall of miracles. I'm afraid of doing something wrong, and really wounding someone's feelings. I've noticed that I tend to make mistakes, and I'm afraid that if I pay this time, it will be the last time. I look back at two months ago, when I wrote a poem... and I wonder a lot about myself.
-------------------------------------------------------
Have you ever met someone that
Turned your life upside-down?
Takes away from the shit of life
And makes it a little less brown…
Have you ever met that special person
Who could always make you smile
Someone who can bring you up
And to run that extra mile.

We all have met someone in our lives
Someone whom we can say “I love you”.
That very special person in our lives…
That person that’s worth pushing to.

If you meet that person, cherish the moments.
Cherish every minute of your life together…
Love is as strong as a rock; as enduring as time.
Love is as soft as a feather; as sudden as the weather.

It is a feeling that will last forever…
It will always exist, for it has no end.
It drives people to do the greatest of things…
And to my good friend, I send
This very poem to express what I think.
Words alone cannot describe what I feel.
They cannot describe what I think about you.
A feeling so strong, it’s just so unreal.

A simple friendship can be fleeting and temporary
Or it can be a special one that lasts forever.
Love is more than a special friendship…
For it is what binds two people together.
-------------------------------------------------------
... can I continue that feeling? Can I go on, knowing full well that my inexperience and clumsiness has wounded previous relationships? Can I go on, knowing full well that the future is uncertain and continuing on may prove to be causing a stronger pain for us both?


I'm excited for I've found a person like no other I've met before. I'm happy that she is someone I can say that I love, and not be ashamed of it, no matter what anyone dares to say to me. I'm thrilled to be able to just talk to the person and know that hearing her voice is enough to wash away my troubles and put me into a blissful happiness.

But yet, I'm still scared. I'm scared that I may say something wrong and hurt feelings. I'm afraid I may not do something right and end up causing trouble. I'm fearful that even though I'm trying my best, it might not be good enough. I'm worried that something could happen to her... which would devistate me too greatly.

I'm terrifyed... very terrifyed... yet I'm thrilled. It's like riding a very intense roller coaster for the very first time. You hear about how awesome it is, and how thrilling it is, and yet you get that sense of a terrifyed thrill and fearful fun flying through your body as you start to plummet down that first hill. You can feel your heart stop, when you realize what is happening. You can feel a stream of laughter and curses fly from your mouth, as you see the ups and downs ahead of you for the first time.

~Rykua http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/14211257/ http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/14211257/ Fri, 17 Aug 2007 12:43:04 PDT
Do I give up possibly the greatest miracle to ever happen to me since I discovered what a video game was... since I discovered I could play piano...

Things seem... complicated lately. Things seem... wrong lately. Things seem... hellish lately. Things seem... f*cked up (for lack of a better term).

I'm confused... I'm lost... and I don't know if I should continue where I'm going... and possibly go even further down if it ends... or end the miracle now, while I can get out with a few years' worth of depression and sadness.

I'm so confused right now, and so lost... I'm afraid to tell her too... I don't know how she'll react. Last time, I panicked. I don't want to lose her, but at the same time, I don't know if I can handle this.

And this retarded vacation is not helping me at all.... I'm confused.



Man, I really need help... I hate the fact I'm so inexperienced when it comes to relationships and girls...

]]> ~Rykua http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/14197943/ http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/14197943/ Thu, 16 Aug 2007 14:49:41 PDT
I'll probably go home, talk to one of my friends, and they'll be like, "You were in ITALY?! WHAT?!"

To which I'll reply, "It's the reason my online time was cut to about 3.14% of it's usual."



Well, anyway, life over here has been weird and effed up. I'll be glad when I get home and get back into the rhythm of things.



In other news, I officially realize how much I suck at drawing. I was working on the Sasuke drawing and the Hinata drawing, and I realized to myself, "God, I suck."

Oh well. Doesn't matter. Maybe I don't suck as much as I think I do. Art is still only a side thing for me. I'll always be a musician... and a writer. It's in me... oh well.

Haha, anyway, just a heads up taht I'll be back in ten days. Yes, you counted 'em right. Ten. I can't wait. Ciao!

~Tsubaki Sakura Onodara

]]> ~Rykua http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/14165928/ http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/14165928/ Tue, 14 Aug 2007 13:48:03 PDT
Made my day, even if it's 10:47 PM right now.

]]> ~Rykua http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/14099437/ http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/14099437/ Fri, 10 Aug 2007 01:56:40 PDT
I'd do Midna, but I heard she looks different from what I've seen. I've gotten up to Hyrule Castle, got stuck, got frustrated... and gave up (yeah, I think I'm at the end of the game).

I think I'll pick it up when I get home, if my friend's finished beating it.



Perhaps a ninja Midna? >.>

Haha, perhaps I'll make an original character and go as him. I always thought about going as Flame... or maybe even Rykua, if I'm willing to put myself in her outfit. ;_;... as much as Rykua is one of my favorite craeted charaters, I have twitches about thining of cosplaying as her. ;_;

I'd need a wig resembling Deidara... and a padded bra to emulate... oh god... where's Jordan when I need good analogies... >.<

Mm, lucky she wears jeans... I don't fancy shaving my arms or legs...




..... ugh, I'm twitching agian, xD!

]]> ~Rykua http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/14099387/ http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/14099387/ Fri, 10 Aug 2007 01:50:22 PDT .>... just wondering.

Yeah, just bored off my ass... I don't feel like working on chapter 3 of my novels (holy shiz, yes, I did work on chapter 2 and finish it). I said I'd get up to Chapter 10 done by August 26 (which is the day I come back to the states).

I updated my MySpace layout... and posted in the two forums I always go to. Hmm... i don't know what else to say.

I guess I can sum it up in two words, my thoughts and feeligns.

"I'm fucking hungry".

Well, that's three words, but the middle word came about as I was typing it, 'cause thinking about how hungry I was made me realize how hungry I really was.

Yeah, that's how bored I am.

Nothing else to put.

]]> ~Rykua http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/14060736/ http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/14060736/ Tue, 07 Aug 2007 13:56:36 PDT
I find it completely perverted, pig-like, and primative.



He says it's natural.

I say that controlling urges is what separates man from the beast.



Who is right?

Who is wrong?



Am I normal?

Or am I different?



... he's been acting suspicious about it lately... trying to force me to look down a girl's shirt when she bends over and stuff. I think he's trying to find out if I'm swingin' the other way or not. Of course, this is the guy who told me that I don't have any friends. He said if I don't talk to the person everyday, and hang out with them once a week, they're not real friends and I shouldn't trust them.

So, should I REALLY give a flying fuck what he thinks? I personally think not, though last night I broke out in tears thinking about my friends and how inconsiderate/not understanding he can be. This trip's renewing my hatred for him... reminding me why I hated him so much in the first place. Telling me I got no true friends, and the ones I do have aren't real, shouldn't be trusted, and will backstab me. Those "friends" that he looks down upon have stood by me more than he ever did in my whole life.



Fuck him. Fuck his ideals. Fuck this trip. Fuck this world. May he rest in pieces when he dies. He better give me all his money in the will... 'cause I deserve every last bit. Abusive little fuck. Always pushing me around when I was younger... punched me in the mouth and made me lose teeth. Yeah... little bastard took advantage of the fact he was stronger. Didn't take into account I was smart, and had a knife. I still savor that day... the day I saw fear in his eyes... the day I felt I had power and worth. It's a great and terrible feeling... somthing all my years of highschool I've struggled to come to terms to and overcome.



So many things have happened before highschool... so many things I just wanted to forget (and many of them I have). A dark and secret past that I don't ever want to remember or have brought up again. A past only my mother can understand... but she's half-crazed anyway (you have to really be around her a lot to understand). I feel so bad for both of my parents, but I still have such intense hatred for what they did. Seeing them. Hearing their voice. Thinking about them. Even hearing about my parents is enough to piss me off for the rest of the day. It's infuriating... maddening... frustrating... just to hear about them, especially my dad.

Hmph... my dad... the drunken abusive bastard who, with my mom, were on welfare for so long... could barely afford to live alone... had to constantly depend on my grandmother. I always looked down upon my dad... I wanted to be nothing like him. Nothing would please me more than to be the opposite of him... BUT not be like my mom (who was an opposite of him, but in a different sense).

Yet here I am, doing the same things he did in his life. Short-tempered, hard to talk to people, unsociable, only a few truly close friends, unable to trust people. He graduated second of his class... very, very bright student... even if at the time he was already an alcoholic. Both of us have so much in common that it's horrifying how much I'm like him.

How much he hated my mom too... how they eventually couldn't get along. Sometimes, I have a fear... that what happened to them will happen to me. Psychiatrists say that most guys will date someone who is a lot like their mother. Personally, I believe most of that psycho-babble is a bunch of bull. If that's true however, and my mom tells me I'm like my dad, I fear history is going to repeat itself.



April 12, 1990... the day they got married. April 12... probably a cursed day... April 12, 2007... is it a curse for relationships in my family? Is it as bad as my February 13? Let it not be true... dear goodness, let it not be true.



I put so much of myself this time into that which I love... so much that if it disappears... if it is gone... I probably will be gone too. Not physically. I'll be here... but never will I be the same again. Never again will I truly smile, for inside I'll always be crying. Never again will I truly laugh, for inside I'll always be sighing.

Loss is great... too great of a burden to be held alone. Let no man burden a loss alone... it is too great and powerful to be conquered by one's own self.



Loss is... loss is... what my nightmares have been like these past few days.

Loss is... what keeps me awake at night and pervades my dreams.

Loss is... what I... ]]> ~Rykua http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/14060407/ http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/14060407/ Tue, 07 Aug 2007 13:32:52 PDT
Name: (This is your name in the story... you don't have to use your name.)
Age: (This is the age you can be... feel free to pick any age... as long as it's in highschool)
Grade Level: (This is the grade your character will be in. 9-12... and make sure it corresponds to the age.)
Description: (Briefly describe yourself. If you are doing a previous age [like, say, 4 years ago, please describe that.])
Clubs: (If you belong to a school club... or if you want to be in the story's band, describe so [if band, tell me what instrument]. It doesn't have to be a real club... it could be a "Video Game Club" if you want... or a "D&D Club". >.<... just as long as the club would fit school rules, lawl).

That's all! I personally requested a few people in the story, and I myself will be in there. Unfortunately, main character spots are filled (not even I myself have a main-character spot... that's reserved for the original characters).

Also, I have to say that space is limited... if you wait too long, you may not get a spot.

]]> ~Rykua http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/14053868/ http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/14053868/ Tue, 07 Aug 2007 03:39:53 PDT
I bought a "How to speak" Japanese learning CD in the shopping area thingy here on the base. Things are cheap here. I kinda like it. Dad's at work, which means I'm alone at the base. When my computer time is done, I may just pull a Stephen King book off the shelf to read. Maybe I might get that done eventually... read the whole book when I'm gone here on vacation.

This vacation has been a drag in the fact that I'm not doing anything that I'm used to doing. But it is great in the fact I am forced to do stuff that I'm not used to doing, like work on the books, lol. In my spare time at the apartment, I might start drawing more. I bought art supplies today... well, as good of an art supply as you can get from your typical "back to school" section in the stores.

Well, let's see... not much else to report. My dad was being condescendingly insulting toward me yesterday, but I didn't let it get to me THAT much. Basically told me I didn't have friends and the ones I do have aren't loyal and aren't real friends. Lol, that interfering bastard wouldn't know what a friend was if that person slapped some sense on his face and said, "Wake up!"



Haha, he has no right to insult the strands that keep my sanity together, and he certainly has no right insulting my lifestyle, just because it is different from his. I bet he's hating the fact, I'm one of the only male family members to not play football for the school team (I played in the marching band). I don't like playign sorts that much. Maybe friendly sports with friends, but certainly nothing to competetive.


Well, not much else to report. I'll see if i can do the smae thimg tomorrow, give an update and such. MySpace is blocked, but the forums are working. I checked up on the RP's but haven't posted yet. I don't have the time to make an elaborate post yet. I'm gonna use the rest of my time to putting my novel's chapter into text form and PMing it to myself on one of the forums, so I can return to it tomorrow.



>.>.... I dunno what else to write, so I guess I'll take leave now. Ciao!

P. S. It's 12:38 PM here, but it's about 6:38 AM back in Jersey. God I miss it at times.

]]> ~Rykua http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/14013654/ http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/14013654/ Sat, 04 Aug 2007 10:33:15 PDT
22 days until I leave for home! I leave 11 AM here, which is 5 AM over in Jersey. Geez, I miss home. As much as I complained about how much I hate South Jersey, I can't help but miss it.

College starts in a month and a day. I go for my licence in about two months. My eighteenth birthday is in seven months. I dunno what else to put. I'm rambling now, but that is beside the point. I'm listening to a string quartet playing Zelda music.

I miss my music compositions, that I've been neglecting. I've been wroking on the novels, but without much progress. I've been wanting a good RP for a while. I still gotta work on scholarships so I can get a transfer to MIT next year (assuming I can still get in somehow).



This summer has been eventful. I've went to Pittsburgh, Baltimore, Rome, and Sicily. Mmmm, Baltimore.... Good Burger..................................... lol.

Funny how you watched that movie when you were a kid, thought it was the stuff, and watched it now and have a whole new perspective on it. I watched it thinking, "Damn, a time when Shaq and Sinbad were THE thing. Where Kenan and Kel were the best things to happen since sliced bread and peanut butter."

... and a time I didn't get the perverted jokes. "Do you want to see my secret place?"

Mmmm, as a kid I never would've gotten that joke, but now I do... it's funny that as you mature and get older, you lose your imagination and your innocence. You lose your idealistic childhood, only to be replaced by a realistic adulthood. Maybe that's why some people are drawn to me. I personally never let go of my childhood and my idealism. I'm still a kid at heart and may mercy bestow her kindness upon the poor soul who takes that away from me. It was bad enough that I've been betrayed in life enough as is... without having the one last thing keeping me who I am taken away.

Take away my unique blend of childish innocence with playful adult prankster immaturity, and that's what you get. Maybe people are drawn to me... as a reminder of who they were...



A reminder of childhood. Free of responsibility. Free of people saying "That's stupid". A time where one kid could go up to a completely random other kid and become friends in the snap of fingers. A time when those kids wouldn't even understand the concept of drama. A time where the biggest miracle in life was seeing the fluffy white clouds in the blue sky and marvel at how it got there, coming up with bizarre theories as to how that could exist. A time... where the harsh realities of life were hidden from your innocence.

That part of me still exists... I refuse to let go. You can say I'm immature, not independant, childish, and stupid... but why should I let go? There is no point. I am who I am... it cannot be changed... I cannot be shaped by anyone but myself and anyone who I give my life's password to...



There's so many things to think about... sometimes I think about over ten years ago in the church basement, where a highschool student in the church was trying to give piano lessons so she could have spare spending money for her wants and needs (as any highschooler can attest [that money drives their lives... and parents rarely give enough of it...]). There I had my first lesson and started my career in music. Here I am, seventeen years later. What have I accomplished?



Yeah, I can play piano. I'd like to say I can play pretty well, as the video I uploaded on MySpace seems to show. Comments about how I can play, and friends envying my talent. Talent... yeah... there are others out there who are younger than me and can do greater, more extrordinary things than I could ever dream.

I play trumpet. Within seven months of playing the trumpet, I was first trumpet in our school band and third best trumpet of all the highschools in the area (BHS students, I'm referring to Honors Band). But still, it doesn't matter. There are others out there better than me. Alex, the other trumpet, has already gotten better than me. Lol, it's like a rivalry in a weird way... we're constantly working with each other's abilities to become better than the other. I need to work on sound and vibration, and he needs to work on sightreading. My first year on trumpet (his fifth, I believe), we couldn't play a simple solo in the band. All three trumpets (at the time) couldn't play the whole thing. I ended up getting it when I was first, and I was only instructed to play half of it (one of the saxes took the other half). Here we are, a year later, looking at that solo, and laughing at how damn simple it is to play. When we re-pulled... ]]> ~Rykua http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/13883325/ http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/13883325/ Thu, 26 Jul 2007 05:05:49 PDT
Create your own Friend Test here


>.>... yeah, a quiz, xD!

]]> ~Rykua http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/13883250/ http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/13883250/ Thu, 26 Jul 2007 04:54:38 PDT
Yeah, envy me all you want. It's taking all my effort to not just give away my ticket. I don't want to go... not one bit.

The circumstances around the trip are too much for me.



First of all, I'm gonna be gone from July 29th to August 26th. That's almost a whole month.

Second of all, my dad is going to be at work in the morning from Monday to Friday.

Third of all, he told me not to bring my laptop... which means I can't at least do something while he's at work.

Fourth of all, I won't be having any kind of internet, no phone... no TV... and no contact with the Italian people. I don't speak Italian... not one bit.

Fifth of all, and probably the biggest reason... I don't get along with my dad at all. Things between me and him are worse than my mother and I. I hadn't seen him in a while, and on our one-week vacation to Pittsburgh, we got into three fights. We don't get along at all. It's like mixing HCl 3.0 M with... say... hm... I can't think of any bases off the top of my head... but it's a volitile mix. Or you could say we get along like Deidara and Tobi... lol...

I'm working on a backup plan here. If things get too bad, I can't just run away from home like I used to... when he lived here. There has to be a plan. If things go wrong, I don't have enough money to pay for a one-way trip back here to America... I spent too much at Otakon. ;_;...



Heh, just find something to sadden the mood that Otakon did. I don't think I've ever been as truly excited and happy in my life in years. Just being at that convention with my friends. The last time I was really ever truly happy like that... was years ago. I didn't want the trip to end. Hell, even without the con, being with my friends was more than enough to be worth what I spent.

Mmmm, nothing like watching Good Burger at, like, 12 AM.

Yeah, I loved that trip. Good memories... and a hell of a lot of girls with cat ears, LOL! I nearly bought a pair for myself.

]]> ~Rykua http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/13827631/ http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/13827631/ Sat, 21 Jul 2007 23:44:59 PDT
Hehe, I spent almost all my spending money in the Artist's Alley. About $70 today and about $50 yesterday. I have about $25 in $1 bills. I'm broke... tomorrow is the lat day...well today.

I can't wait! Last dayyyy!

]]> ~Rykua http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/13801451/ http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/13801451/ Thu, 19 Jul 2007 22:28:19 PDT
... or you can message me here, but I'm not on here much... I'm a bit confused at the interface, lol.

]]> ~Rykua http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/11547495/ http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/11547495/ Tue, 23 Jan 2007 22:04:12 PST
Plus, I don't have Photoshop on this computer. I can't do anything. I might post a story up sometime soon...



I have three novels I'm writing. Two have two chapters done, and one has only a rough-draft of the first chatper. The two with chapters severely need to be edited. I'm trying to be un-lazy, but it's being hard.

Also, I got quite a few musical solos coming up, so I'm trying to practice for that. I got a Chopin etude on piano, a trombone solo, trumpet solos for Jazz Band, and a few piano solos for Jazz Band. Not to mention Honors Band is coming up, and I do NOT want to get anything less than first chair.

I could do some more rough drafts of chappie 1 at the lunch in honors band. We get about 30 minutes.

Or I could work on another drawing.

Or I could work on the composition I was supposed to have our band perform, lol.

I dunno. I have so many things planned and so little time.

Three novel series, and one novel after the three series are over (one is 7 books, one is 3 books, and the other is unknown... possibly only one). It's at least 12 novels... and I plan on each of them being at least 500 pages each...



Hehe, I overwork myself. But hey, in the end when I get everything done, it's worth it.

]]> ~Rykua http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/11545216/ http://Rykua.deviantart.com/journal/11545216/ Tue, 23 Jan 2007 18:18:26 PST
Well, dunno. I started adding people that I find interesting (into video games like the games I like, into anime... all that jazz). So, all of you. Greetings! Welcome to my DeviantArt, and hopefully, unlike my Xanga, LiveJournal, and Facebook, it actually stays alive.

xDDD! Yeah. I'm a bit lazy with stuff.

Oh well...

Anyway, hello everyone. Hope to use this site to the best of it's (and my) ability.

*bows* I now end this post. Over and out.

]]> ~Rykua