http://search.deviantart.com/?q=by:TheToshiCreature&section=today deviantART RSS for by:TheToshiCreature en-us Copyright 2009, deviantART.com Sun, 06 Dec 2009 15:15:05 PST deviantART.com http://blogs.law.harvard.edu/tech/rss http://s.deviantart.com/minish/widgets/apple-touch-icon-precomposed.png http://TheToshiCreature.deviantart.com/journal/20443081/ http://TheToshiCreature.deviantart.com/journal/20443081/ Thu, 11 Sep 2008 17:17:49 PDT
She, quite rightfully, couldn't take my pushing her away like that anymore, and so our relationship has changed.

We've decided that we're considering it on hold, rather than over, because we both still love each other, but for now we're just friends.

I've been quite distraught, and verging on suicidal (I really just kind of wanted to stab a box cutter into my wrist the other night), and generally very depressed, since January. Also when I was in Japan, but whatever. It goes up and down, and when I'm down I tend to do the stupid thing and push people away more.

Hopefully, though, things are getting better. I had dance yesterday, and feel better than I've felt this year (except for maybe at Spocon, with the sewing, but that's a different kind of better). I'm trying to be good and not push people away, I'm exercising again, I have classes (zomg 18 units is going to kill me...) to keep me busy, and I'm going to (hopefully) start seeing the school counselour again. Which isn't great, but generally is better than nothing. And keep taking my happy pills. Because they're important to my general mental health.

Anyhow, I need to go back to sleep now, because I'm kind of severely deprived, and sleep deprivation makes the depression worse.

]]> ~TheToshiCreature http://TheToshiCreature.deviantart.com/journal/20019040/ http://TheToshiCreature.deviantart.com/journal/20019040/ Mon, 18 Aug 2008 09:06:00 PDT
I'll be around more frequently soon, I expect, as I get back to school in two weeks. In the interim, I doubt I'll be online except for to check my email from school and my mother, seeing as they're the important ones right now (not to mention the only emails I receive...).

Summer has been pretty good, much better than it could have been, all things told. More about that later, because I need to go eat breakfast and sew like a mad thing. I'll put pictures up later. Also, Dawnbluewings will be starting a new account specifically for the work we've been doing, which I expect the two of us will share. I'll post when it's set up, and you should all go check it out and commission things.

]]> ~TheToshiCreature http://TheToshiCreature.deviantart.com/journal/18365771/ http://TheToshiCreature.deviantart.com/journal/18365771/ Sat, 17 May 2008 11:02:27 PDT
This is because my friend the NilTwin told me at dinner when I kidnapped him.

He didn't know until he read it on a BRITISH blog. And he's much more up on these things than I am.

WTF. How could I not know about this awesomeness?!

That said, I now have to RUN ABOUT DANCING AND BOUNCING AND SQUEEING AND SHRIEKING LIKE A MAD THING BECAUSE IT IS SO MUCH WIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIN!!!!!!!!




In other news, my mom hung up on me when I tried to talk to her about plans for the summer. So I now officially should* have a ticket. For when I want to go, not when my mother wants me to go. Meaning I'm being assertive, which is a good thing. *tries to stop being a doormat*

But yes, I'm going up to my love's house on the 10th of June! 'Tis quite happy. ^.^

* The internets were being stupid last night, and I haven't got a confirmation email yet, so I'm not sure.

]]> ~TheToshiCreature http://TheToshiCreature.deviantart.com/journal/18295891/ http://TheToshiCreature.deviantart.com/journal/18295891/ Mon, 12 May 2008 19:41:00 PDT
HE TOLD ME I SHOULD BE IN ART SCHOOL.

WOW.

*is amazed*

WTF?!

Just......ART SCHOOL. That's...kind of amazingly high praise for somebody who would never draw unless she had to because she was so terrible (not to mention afraid).

I....*faints from amazement at it all*

I never thought of myself as creative, certainly not in the past several years. I've avoided art like the plague, and only took it because a fine art is required to graduate here and they don't have any dance classes (where I can be told exactly what to do, do it, and go on).

I wanted to be an architect when I was little: read technical math stuff. And I liked playing with clay.

But I've NEVER been happy with my artwork before.

And now I am.

Well, sort of. At least I'm not throwing it out in shame?

BUT ART SCHOOL. H C*H@N#:!#JH BP(!B){H!B({!!!!BLKB!IB!OUBFN!@!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Somebody pinch me. Please?

]]> ~TheToshiCreature http://TheToshiCreature.deviantart.com/journal/17483900/ http://TheToshiCreature.deviantart.com/journal/17483900/ Sun, 23 Mar 2008 22:32:11 PDT I has stolen it from Drae, but it's from here: [link]

1. Do you think NilAthelion is a virgin?
I know exactly what Nil has and hasn't done, but I'll protect his privacy. Here, at least. Poor lad.

2. What do you think of dawnbluewings?
She is the most amazing woman I have ever met in many ways, and I love her to the ends of the earth. She's talented, loving, kind, funny, smart, all those wonderful things. Mostly, though, she's exactly whom I want and need, and I hope I can be the same for her. Basically I think she's awesome.

3. In a race between you, Lis4theway and Biblio, who would win?
Probably Biblio, given her long legs, Lis's present poor healthness, and my knees.

4. How did you meet draegyn-eyed?
Meet? We haven't. We know each other through dawnbluewings via DA.

5. Would you marry Lis4theway?
Nope. Love you, dear, but no.

6. What would dawnbluewings not be caught dead in?
Normal clothes.

7. What's NilAthelion's opinion on cheese?
I'm not sure? I expect he likes it. I can't recall at the moment.

8. What song could be lily-kiernan's theme song?
I've no idea. I know neither her nor music well enough.

9. Can lily-kiernan be bad influence?
Yes, I expect so.

10. Name something you have in common with lily-kiernan?
Aurora.

]]> ~TheToshiCreature http://TheToshiCreature.deviantart.com/journal/17355345/ http://TheToshiCreature.deviantart.com/journal/17355345/ Sat, 15 Mar 2008 23:08:27 PDT
Also! I has made more arts, and posted them! There are quite a few in scraps now, too, which you can take a look at or not as you please. It's sort of evidence of my having improved over the past month and a half. I find it quite a drastic improvement, even if I'm still scared of art a bit.

On a VERY HAPPY NOTE! My Aurora is coming to visit me here at school! Rules dictate that she can only stay for four days, but still! *bounces* I is be HAPPY!

]]> ~TheToshiCreature http://TheToshiCreature.deviantart.com/journal/17246471/ http://TheToshiCreature.deviantart.com/journal/17246471/ Sat, 08 Mar 2008 20:23:34 PST
I should draw my roll of caution tape. With something else, but CAUTION TAPE. Yay, I think I know what I'm going to do! *bounces*

Now, off to eat mochi ice cream and then draw. you all!

]]> ~TheToshiCreature http://TheToshiCreature.deviantart.com/journal/17087271/ http://TheToshiCreature.deviantart.com/journal/17087271/ Wed, 27 Feb 2008 10:55:46 PST
So I'm wheeling myself around in a wheelchair right now. Knees died on Monday, and I'm trying to let them rest until I can walk with more surety. Hopefully tomorrow.

Art class is going well, though we haven't really produced anything that would belong here. I may put things up, or I may not. They're all exercises, but they're gradually getting more interesting. I figure I can put things up to look at progress, and eventually scrap them, eh?

Life is generally painful and bad, but I'm trying to fix things and stop being depressed. Sometimes it works; sometimes it doesn't. Help is always appreciated. Friendship, randomness, calls/PMs/whatever for whatever (or no) reason, people to push me up the ramps because my arm is cramped up to the point that I can barely use it, whatever.

I'm currently working on sending my mom a letter about my sexuality and stuff, which will hopefully help her to understand who I am, and hopefully will let things become peaceable that I may spend the summer in Arborvill instead of with mi madre. Porque la vida con mi madre es muy dificil y no es feliz.

But a happy thing! I won the beginning level Spanish speech contest yesterday! *bounces about* Since I've only been studying for a month, this is rather amazing. Of course, they may have given me the prize because of being decent despite only having a month of study since junior high, but I'm not going to let that get to me. I won, I won, I won!!!!! *is happy*

Ahem. Yes. Um. TUMBLEWEED~!!!!!!! *runs away and hides*

]]> ~TheToshiCreature http://TheToshiCreature.deviantart.com/journal/17087193/ http://TheToshiCreature.deviantart.com/journal/17087193/ Wed, 27 Feb 2008 10:48:31 PST
1) Are you currently in a serious relationship? Very much so. *loves her 'Rora*

2) What was your dream growing up? I wanted to be an architect (and a ballerina and pottery teacher in my spare time).

3) What talent do you wish you had? Optimism.

4) If I bought you a drink what would it be? Real Indian Chai.

5) Favorite vegetable? Probably corn for me, too. Don't get it often, though.

6) What was the last book you read? Living Wabi Sabi.

7) What zodiac sign are you? Cancer.

8) Any Tattoos and/or Piercings? Explain where. Just one hole in each earlobe.

9) Worst Habit? Perfectionism.

10) If you saw me walking down the street would you offer me a ride? No, because I don't own a car and I don't actually know you well enough that I would recognize you even if I did.

11) What is your favorite sport? Dance! Or if you want a "real" sport, soccer or aikido.

12) Do you have a Negative or Optimistic attitude? Realistic, but generally negative.

13) What would you do if you were stuck in an elevator with me? Get to know you, I guess. But mainly figure out how to get out.

14) Worst thing to ever happen to you? My parents' divorce leading to all the crap it's caused. Or my first knee injury, but the divorce is largely what kept that from healing properly, believe it or not.

15) Tell me one weird fact about you. I can lick my nose.

16) Do you have any pets? Not at school. My owner (aka cat) lives at my mother's house. My other owners (three of them) live at my lover's house, where I shall live over the summer, so I guess that makes them mine.

17) What if I showed up at your house unexpectedly? I wouldn't be there. At my dorm, I would be confused.

18) What was your first impression of me? Bit of a rabid lesbian, not quite comfortable with things and so overdoes them.

19) Do you think clowns are cute or scary? Neither? They can be funny, mostly they're just childishly silly.

20) If you could change one thing about how you look, what would it be? The bits of pudginess around my waist and stomach. They tick me off. Dawn, don't gripe at me. I just answered a question.

21) Would you be my crime partner or my conscience? Partner in crime, I think. I'd be the conscience, if anything.

22) What color eyes do you have? Blue.

23) Ever been arrested? Never, don't intend to be.

24) Bottle or can soda? Bottle. And not soda, because soda is nasty. Give me a bottle of milk instead!

25) If you won $10,000 today, what would you do with it? Pay whatever taxes on it, then put the rest in a CD.

27) What's your favorite place to hang at? Dawn's lap? Her house in general is good.

28) Do you believe in ghosts? Possibly. Probably not.

29) Favorite thing to do in your spare time? Read bad HP fics. Talk to my lover. What free time?

30) Do you swear a lot? Lately, yeah. Fucking fucked up life. *wrinkles nose* I try to only when I need to, though.

31) Biggest pet peeve? People being certain about stupid and obviously wrong things.

32) In one word, how would you describe yourself? STRANGE.

33) Do you believe/appreciate romance? I'm a romantic mushball. I may not be a dualist, but I believe that romance is natural and meaningful to the mind, and I certainly love it.

35) Do you believe in God? Not the Christian one. I'm agnostic pagan. Sort of Wiccan, sort of my own created Goddess religion, but I don't believe in it. Then again, I don't disbelieve it, either. I'm a skeptic, in the Sextusian sense.

36) Will you repost this so I can fill it out and do the same for you? Look up.

]]> ~TheToshiCreature http://TheToshiCreature.deviantart.com/journal/16435188/ http://TheToshiCreature.deviantart.com/journal/16435188/ Wed, 16 Jan 2008 16:40:51 PST
1. Smoked. []
2. Consumed alcohol. [x] (A sip of mead, which is just as gross as the rest)
3. Slept in the same bed with someone of the opposite sex. [x]
4. Slept in the same bed with someone of the same sex. [x]
5. Kissed someone of the same sex. [x]
6. Had sex. [x]
7. Had someone in your room other than family. [x]
8. Watched porn. []
9. Bought porn. []
10. Done drugs. [](Only the legal ones)
TOTAL: 6

1. Taken painkillers. [x]
2. Taken someone else's prescription medicine. [x]
3. Lied to your parents. [x]
4. Lied to a friend. [x]
5. Been to rehab. []
6. Done something illegal. [x] (Jaywalked. In downtown LA. It wasn't intentional!)
7. Cut yourself. []
8. Hurt someone. [x]
9. Been to a club. []
10. Seen someone die. []
TOTAL: 6

1. Missed curfew. []
2. Stayed out all night. [x]
3. Eaten a carton of ice cream by yourself. [x]
4. Been to a therapist. [](But I'm going on Monday >.<
5. Snuck out of the house. [x]
6. Dyed your hair. []
7. Received a ticket. []
8. Been in an accident. []
9. Wished someone to die. [x]
10. Been to a bar. []
TOTAL: 4

1. Been to a wild party. []
2. Been to a Mardi Gras parade. [ ]
3. Drank more than four beers in a night. []
4. Had a spring break in Florida. []
5. Sniffed anything. []
6. Wore black nail polish. []
7. Wore arm bands. [x]
8. Wore t-shirts with band names. []
9. Listened to rap. [x] (Even sung it. It FAILED.)
10. Owned a 50 Cent CD. []
TOTAL: 2

1. Dressed Gothic. []
2. Dressed prep.[]
3. Dressed punk. []
4. Dressed grunge. [] (On all of these: Not really, because I never followed anybody's fashions. Ever.)
5. Stole something. []
6. Been too drunk to remember anything. []
7. Blacked out. [x]
8. Fainted. []
9. Had a crush on a neighbor. [x](If a roommate counts?)
TOTAL: 2

1. Snuck into someone else's room. [x]
2. Had a crush on your friend. [X]
3. Been to a concert. [x]
4. Dry-humped someone. [x]
5. Been called a slut. []
6. Called someone a slut. []
7. Installed speakers in your car. []
8. Broken a mirror. []
9. Showered at someone of the opposites sex's house. [x]
10. Brushed your teeth with someone else’s toothbrush. [x]
TOTAL: 6

1. Consider/Considered Ludacris your favorite rapper. []
2. Seen an R-rated movie in theater. [x]
3. Cruised the mall. [x]
4. Skipped school. [x]
5. Had surgery. [x]
6. Had an injury. [x]
7. Gone to court. []
8. Walked out of a restaurant without paying/tipping. []
9. Caught something on fire. []
10. Lied about your age. []
TOTAL: 5


1. Owned/rented an apartment.[]
2. Broke the law in the police's presence. [x](Damned jaywalking. Luckily it was close enough they didn't call me on it.)
3. Made out with someone who had a gf/bf. []
4. Got in trouble with the police. []
5. Talked to a stranger. [x]
6. Hugged a stranger. [x]
7. Kissed a stranger. []
8. Rode in the car with a stranger. []
9. Been harassed. []
10. Been verbally harassed. []
TOTAL: 3

1. Met face-to-face with someone you met online. [x]
2. Stayed online for 5 hours straight. [x]
3. Talked on the phone for more than 4 hours straight. [x]
4. Watched TV for 5 hours straight. [x]
5. Been to a fair. [x]
6. Been called a bad influence. [x] (I'm sure I have been. Dragon Lady.)
7. Drink and drive. []
8. Prank-called someone. []
9. Laid on a couch with someone of the opposite sex. [x]
10. Cheated on a test. []
TOTAL: 7

TEST TOTAL: 41

]]> ~TheToshiCreature http://TheToshiCreature.deviantart.com/journal/15921005/ http://TheToshiCreature.deviantart.com/journal/15921005/ Thu, 13 Dec 2007 17:14:01 PST

The Basics
1.What time is it? 15:26 PCT
2. Full Name: Nathanial Surry. Not disclosing the normal earth name. Toshiko Minerva also works.
3. Birthday: July 12th, 1989
4. Location: California
5. School/Mascot/Colors: Blue and white and gold (I think)/Lions
6. sign: Cancer
7. Shoe Size: 7ish
8. height: 5'7"
9. Pets: My kitty Thundercloud and lots of fish. But they're all at la casa de mi madre, not with me at college.
10. Siblings: Two
11. Eye color: Blue
12. Hair color: Blonde
13. Favorite color(s): Purple, blue, green
14. Hobbies: DANCE! Reading, talking with my beautiful girlfriend.
15. Nicknames: Fluffy, Toshi, Nate, Leo, Yuka, other things
16. What languages do you speak? English, Japanese, Irish Gaelic (but only in my sleep so far), a little Spanish
17. Do you play sports? Yup. I dance. I ran cross country and did track, too, and used to play soccer.
18. Where were you born? Central California.
19. Are you a night or a morning person? Night!
20. Are you ticklish? >.> None of that, now!
21. Do you believe in God? Erm, well, I'm agnostic, and some sort of Pagan. So yes, but not the one they're talking about. And only skeptically. Thingie.

Getting Personal
23. What do you want to be when you grow up? A professor or an IO psychologist person. Something to do with BRAINS. But not cutting them up. Only metaphorically.
24. What was the worst day of your life? Probably the day with the issues with Ichigo.
25. What is your most embarrassing story? I can't remember..
26. What has been the best day of your life? I'm not sure? It may well fall in the next week, at Aurora's house.
28. Do you have a boy friend/girlfriend? Yup! *loveses her*
29. What are you most scared of? Failure. Rejection. People lying to me.
30. If you had an extra set of eyes were would you put them? Probably on my inner wrists.
31. What do you usually think about before you go to bed? Aurora, of course.

Favourite
50. Movie: LOTR, possibly. I have no idea.
51. Song: No idea!
52. Band/Group/Artist: Ditto. This and the one before depend on my mood.
53. Store: Mystic Merchant and Shelby Ranch.
54. Relative: Um. I don't know that I have one. I'm not particularly fond of any of them.
55. Sport: BALLET. Dance. Soccer. In that order.
56. Vacation Spot: Wherever my beloved Aurora is.
57. Ice Cream Flavor: Medieval Madness! And lemon sherbert.
58. Veggie: Squash, probably.
59. Candy: CHOCOLATE. Dark chocolate with mint or caramel or orange.
60. Car: I always kind of wanted a lotus? But I'm scared of driving. I'll stick with my bicycle and feet.
61. Class: Psychology!
62. Holiday: Cat Day.
63. Day of the Week: Friday and the end of classes and time to call my lover.
64. Color: Purple, blue, green. But I already said this. And yes, all three. It depends on the shade.
65. Magazine: Don't read any.
66. Name for a Girl: Aurora? Not sure.
67. Name for a Boy: Not sure.

In the Past 24 Hours have You
69. Had a serious talk? Yes. While I should have been studying.
70. Hugged someone? Yup.
71. Fought with a friend? Nope.
72. Cried? No, but I came close with the sleep deprivation.
73. Laughed? Aye.
74. Made someone laugh? Yes.
75. Bought something? Yes. CAFFEINE.
76. Cut your hair? Nope.
77. Felt stupid? Probably!
78. Talked to someone you love? Thankfully, yes, though sadly only via IM.
79. Missed someone? Always. But not next week when I'm with her!

Have you Ever
81. Done drugs? Nope.
82. Eaten an entire box of oreos? Nope.
83. Ridden a tiger? No, though it sounds cool but it would be extremely stupid.
85. Watched Punky Brewster? No?
86. Hiked a mountain? Yuppers!
87. Stayed home on Saturday night, just because? Every Saturday night?
88. Been in love? Oh yes. Completely.
89. Seen the White house? Nope.
90. Seen the Eiffel tower? Nope.
91. Tried smoking? Gods no.
92. Drank alcohol? Small sips to taste. Never liked it.
93. Smoked marijuana? Nope.
94. Played monopoly? Yes.
95. Seen Titanic? Yes.
96. Kissed someone? Mhmmm. Yummy.
99. Tried a weight loss program? Nope.
101. Visited another country? Twice! Mexico for a week, J... ]]> ~TheToshiCreature http://TheToshiCreature.deviantart.com/journal/15865027/ http://TheToshiCreature.deviantart.com/journal/15865027/ Sun, 09 Dec 2007 15:25:48 PST
This means I may actually put things here, since I'm going to be required to be making art. And not throw it away. And to FINISH it. So yes. Whee!

Also, in less than a week I'm going up to the home of my beautiful Aurora, and she is making me do watercolours. So thingie. If there's time. Maybe when she comes down to my house and we have to not be awkward in front of mi madre because mi madre is being homophobic at us. *growls* But yes! I shall put arts up! Maybe!

Actually, at the moment, I'm much busier procrastinating on studying for finals by being happy about getting to go see my girlfriend, because she is awesome and made of win. *dances about*

]]> ~TheToshiCreature http://TheToshiCreature.deviantart.com/journal/15527780/ http://TheToshiCreature.deviantart.com/journal/15527780/ Thu, 15 Nov 2007 23:34:18 PST
Instructions:
1) Answer with only the answer. No explanation as to why. Let people guess.
2) If someone asks why you are something in a comment, tell them to guess, then give them the answer once they do.
3) Post to your journal and tag four folks.

What would you be….

If you were a creature (non-humanoid) from any literary universe(and which universe)?
Either a unicorn or some sort of dragon, either from any of many universes.

If you were an inanimate object?
A book.

If you were a plant?
Leontopodium Alpinus (sp?).

If you were a bird?
An owl.

If you were a character from a comic book(and which comic)?
A from the Death Note fandom and comics.
(And Nate, from Citrus!)

If you were a shape?
An ellipse.

If you were a color?
Purple.

If you were a noise?
The heavenly noise of the moon.

If you were a fruit?
An orange.

If you were a candy?
Dark chocolate with orange bits or caramel.

If you were a tea?
Good Indian Chai.

]]> ~TheToshiCreature http://TheToshiCreature.deviantart.com/journal/15281289/ http://TheToshiCreature.deviantart.com/journal/15281289/ Tue, 30 Oct 2007 01:02:30 PDT
I have to:
1. post these rules
2. each person tagged must post 8 random facts about themselves
3. tags should write a journal of these facts
4. at the end of the post 8 more bloggers are tagged and named (Cheating on this one; I don't have people to tag.)
5. go to their page and leave a comment telling them that they're tagged.

1. I am basically incapable of living without chocolate.

2. I tie Caution Tape on all my bags, and no, I don't steal it.

3. I'm the Fairy Princess.

4. I obsess over things. Particularly lemons.

5. I have Japanese candy wrappers and pretty boy not-quite-porn on the wall of my room. I didn't put it up.

6. I have two facebooks. One sits on the shelf of my desk; the other I access via the internet.

7. I can next give blood on November 23rd. I don't know my blood type, though.

8. My favorite way to practice katakana is to write them on my leg.

]]> ~TheToshiCreature