http://search.deviantart.com/?q=by:TouchOfRed&section=today deviantART RSS for by:TouchOfRed en-us Copyright 2009, deviantART.com Wed, 16 Dec 2009 23:16:57 PST deviantART.com http://blogs.law.harvard.edu/tech/rss http://s.deviantart.com/minish/widgets/apple-touch-icon-precomposed.png http://TouchOfRed.deviantart.com/journal/12416721/ http://TouchOfRed.deviantart.com/journal/12416721/ Sun, 01 Apr 2007 13:12:15 PDT That's it for now

]]> ~TouchOfRed http://TouchOfRed.deviantart.com/journal/10035235/ http://TouchOfRed.deviantart.com/journal/10035235/ Mon, 11 Sep 2006 03:29:12 PDT I keep having thoughts about how she'll end up leaving me when she comes to her senses and realises I'm not that great or remember how much she felt for one of her ex's. Then she might think about how life would be with them now or how she would feel doing things we've done but with those other guys instead and all that makes me feel worse. I trust Clara and I love her with all my heart but sometimes I think she doubts our relationship, at least it feels like she does. I never doubt it and I don't think I ever come across that I am doubting it either. Does the fact she doubts us mean that she thinks it won't work out or is it that I'm just so afraid of loosing her I take things to heart, too seriously and convince myself something is wrong when really nothing is?
I don't know what to think really, this stuff always goes around in my head and I never let it out. Clara is the only thing I have in my life that seems to make it worth the effort of the things I do, like going to work or taking care of myself or being friendly to people I dislike. I know everyone has ex's and sometimes they're involved in each others lives but I know she would be upset if I still spoke to my ex's and she spends so much time talking to me about hers. I just don't know what to make of it.
Another thing that's been on my mind is God. I became a Christian recently, something I never really thought I'd do but it's been good so far. I don't really like the singing in church and for whatever reason I still feel like I don't belong there, like I don't fit in but I still want to go and learn and try to be what I feel like I'm supposed to be. I've thought about it so much I thought I was going to go crazy - in the end I just realised that all my life I'd had faith, faith in life. I've always said 'don't worry it'll work out' and things like that now I just have to direct my faith to God. He'll make things work out, if it's His will. It's not the easiest thing to do but I do belive it's right. My Granda is in hospital right now with heart problems. I pray that she'll get better but I have a horrible feeling in my gut that she's not going to be okay. I hope I'm wrong.
I'm trying to sell some of my stuff I don't need anymore on ebay so I can have some money to do a few things like take a holiday and get my exhaust paid off and stuff. It's so hard to save money these days and bills and debts just seem to breed - it's crazy.
Anyway in lighter news my car is finally fixed so I can drive again. I love driving it's good for thinking and it's pretty fun plus I get to listen to music all the time. I love driving Clara around too, I feel like we're in our own little world when we're cruising down the freeways.

Sorry to the people who've left comments and messages that I haven't responded too, DA hasn't been very high on my list of things too do lately and I have a new blog rather than just using this for one. If you want the link just message me and I'll give it. I'll try to do something to post here soon, I keep starting things but never finish them.
I've been working on Gradient meshing and I've come up with some pretty cool things so maybe I'll get a project started when I have a little more time, maybe during the holidays heh. I hope your all well and I'm still checking out all your art just not commenting, sorry for that but.. well you know.

]]> ~TouchOfRed http://TouchOfRed.deviantart.com/journal/9217885/ http://TouchOfRed.deviantart.com/journal/9217885/ Thu, 29 Jun 2006 06:21:45 PDT It seems every day I upset her. I know she loves me and I know I love her. I try so hard to be everything I know she wants me to be but I always end up doing something wrong. It kind of makes me wonder when people say things like "when you meet the one you'll know it". I know it now but I always figured the reason I'd know it was because it would be a perfect relationship where neither party ever gets upset. I suppose that's unrealistic. I just wish I didn't make her sad and it worries me so much that I keep doing it, how much can she take before it's too much, will she just get fed up with it and leave me? I hope not.

I hate using this journal to have a big whinge but there isn't really many people who read it and there isn't many people I can talk to anywhere else so I guess it doesn't matter, heh. Well that's it from me for now.

]]> ~TouchOfRed http://TouchOfRed.deviantart.com/journal/8977017/ http://TouchOfRed.deviantart.com/journal/8977017/ Mon, 05 Jun 2006 10:19:55 PDT
Then there is Clara, she is the one. I'm kind of waking up to the fact that I hadn't really loved a person until I met her, well I thought I had but it wasn't love. Apart from like my family of course but what I feel now is alot stronger than that even. Hard to describe... don't really know what else to say, it's late.

]]> ~TouchOfRed http://TouchOfRed.deviantart.com/journal/8774566/ http://TouchOfRed.deviantart.com/journal/8774566/ Mon, 15 May 2006 03:32:02 PDT [link] stuck in my head for awhile now. I know a few of you who read my journal write poetry so maybe you'll appreciate this, I think it's really good. Don't forget to leave a comment for her too, no good telling me what you think, let her know.

In other news, I'm going away for awhile on Sunday. Bit of a holiday down south with Clara and I can't wait. Also means a week off work too so it's like twice as awesome as just a weekend away. Um that's about it really, I'm moving out again sometime soon so that's kind of exciting... oh and I got a new double bed which is awesome too and that's about it.

Pointless DA journal entry +1



]]> ~TouchOfRed http://TouchOfRed.deviantart.com/journal/8696832/ http://TouchOfRed.deviantart.com/journal/8696832/ Sun, 07 May 2006 02:36:05 PDT I didn't really ever want to get married and have kids and the whole settle down thing, probably because I just presumed it wouldn't ever happen but I've been thinking about all that differently now, it's great.
Anyways, far as actual events go I've been spending every minute I can with Clara, at times literally blackmailing her into spending time with me
She's so amazing and I don't know what I'd do without her now, when I'm not close to her I miss her so much it's a physical feeling in the pit of my stomach like some part of me isn't where it should be.
It's hard to belive how much and how fast things change. Also hard to belive what a great time I have with her and how happier I am. Everyone I know has been saying things to me like "Meeting that girl is doing you a world of good". Well I could go on about her all day but I probably shouldn't 'cause no one likes a rambler, heh.

Art stuff isn't going as well, I've been really inspired to do something and I've thought about starting it, I've even had some spare time to do it but for whatever reason it just doesn't happen. Well I'm going on a bit of a break soon so maybe when I get back I'll be able to sit down and do something.

]]> ~TouchOfRed http://TouchOfRed.deviantart.com/journal/8485028/ http://TouchOfRed.deviantart.com/journal/8485028/ Sun, 16 Apr 2006 02:37:51 PDT
]]> ~TouchOfRed http://TouchOfRed.deviantart.com/journal/8071737/ http://TouchOfRed.deviantart.com/journal/8071737/ Sun, 05 Mar 2006 06:50:34 PST Anyways besides that I've just been a lazy fucker honestly.
I stuck this up for a bit of a preview at what I've been working on, about 2 seconds every day.
[link]

]]> ~TouchOfRed http://TouchOfRed.deviantart.com/journal/7852693/ http://TouchOfRed.deviantart.com/journal/7852693/ Fri, 10 Feb 2006 03:49:35 PST

]]> ~TouchOfRed http://TouchOfRed.deviantart.com/journal/7306677/ http://TouchOfRed.deviantart.com/journal/7306677/ Wed, 14 Dec 2005 05:11:50 PST ~TouchOfRed http://TouchOfRed.deviantart.com/journal/6200026/ http://TouchOfRed.deviantart.com/journal/6200026/ Thu, 11 Aug 2005 16:48:19 PDT
]]> ~TouchOfRed http://TouchOfRed.deviantart.com/journal/6090933/ http://TouchOfRed.deviantart.com/journal/6090933/ Sun, 31 Jul 2005 16:12:34 PDT justthorne

Go read the journal entries, follow the links, have a look at what's going on. People are supporting °jark simply because he deserves it. DA is a business but in business when your customers aren't happy you need to do something about how your running your company.

]]> ~TouchOfRed http://TouchOfRed.deviantart.com/journal/5964031/ http://TouchOfRed.deviantart.com/journal/5964031/ Mon, 18 Jul 2005 00:09:23 PDT What else.. birthday.. Australia.. girl. Yup that's it.

]]> ~TouchOfRed http://TouchOfRed.deviantart.com/journal/5575988/ http://TouchOfRed.deviantart.com/journal/5575988/ Tue, 07 Jun 2005 01:38:45 PDT [link]
[link]

That's all I have to say.

]]> ~TouchOfRed http://TouchOfRed.deviantart.com/journal/5480834/ http://TouchOfRed.deviantart.com/journal/5480834/ Fri, 27 May 2005 21:31:36 PDT

Man, I can't wait to go home.

]]> ~TouchOfRed http://TouchOfRed.deviantart.com/journal/5379794/ http://TouchOfRed.deviantart.com/journal/5379794/ Tue, 17 May 2005 04:56:44 PDT Now that is out of the way I'm going to start on a collab with ~RetinalMist this has been in the works for a long, long time and I think it's going to be amazing when it's done. Based on an old manipulation of mine we're vectoring.
What else.. not much really. I guess thanks for the 4k page views is all I have left to say.

]]> ~TouchOfRed http://TouchOfRed.deviantart.com/journal/5282245/ http://TouchOfRed.deviantart.com/journal/5282245/ Fri, 06 May 2005 07:06:40 PDT
]]> ~TouchOfRed http://TouchOfRed.deviantart.com/journal/5172331/ http://TouchOfRed.deviantart.com/journal/5172331/ Sun, 24 Apr 2005 00:08:36 PDT Apart from that not much else. Reading a really good book, Sequal to The Bone Collector. Finished the Bourne Legacy and I'm a little upset about it, such a good book I'll miss that one.
Came across 2 bands this week - The Haunted and It Dies Today. Good stuff.
Time to leave England is getting closer and I still have people to see though I doubt I'll end up seeing any of them so sorry to you if your one and happen to be reading this... should probably go sleep now since it's uhm 8am

]]> ~TouchOfRed http://TouchOfRed.deviantart.com/journal/5024000/ http://TouchOfRed.deviantart.com/journal/5024000/ Thu, 07 Apr 2005 09:45:47 PDT

In other news, still trying to sort out my passport to go back to Australia, hopefully I'll get it in time or I'll have to put my flight date back awhile.

]]> ~TouchOfRed