http://search.deviantart.com/?q=by:UnderTheUmbrella&section=today deviantART RSS for by:UnderTheUmbrella en-us Copyright 2009, deviantART.com Mon, 28 Dec 2009 16:35:19 PST deviantART.com http://blogs.law.harvard.edu/tech/rss http://s.deviantart.com/minish/widgets/apple-touch-icon-precomposed.png http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/28892801/ http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/28892801/ Fri, 11 Dec 2009 22:19:40 PST
- See the Ocean
- Get a tattoo
- See everyone at lest once again


Three Names You Go By:

- Lyssa
- Abyss (Victor's family's nickname)
- Alyss (grandparents)


Three Screen Names You Have Had:

- abysscentipede (go figure )
- truesoulkyoko (Ah, the good 'ol days)
- brokentrust24 (yeah, I was a emo kid, so wut :< )


Three Physical Things You Like About Yourself:

- Mah boobs (they hold things)
- Mah eyes
- Mah new hair cut


Three Parts Of Your Heritage:

- German (I make your beer)
- Polish (and bring it to you)
- French (Je suis poisoin?)


Three Things That Scare You:

- El Chupacabra stories (You STFU right now)
- My siblings getting kidnapped (I couldn't bare it...)
- Losing anymore of my friends or loved ones


Three Of Your Everyday Essentials:

- Shower (Only for the people around me You're very welcome)
- Some kind of food (I liek chocolate milk!)
- Entertainment (Games, my sister telling my dad how she heard Santa cursing, or maybe just a couple of rednecks talking about decorating their truck with Christmas lights, you can't go wrong.)


Three Things You Are Wearing Right Now:

- Mah new LittleBigPlanet shirt
- Blue jeans (Been wearing them for a couple of days now, yep)
- Sox


Three Of Your Favorite Bands/Musical Artists:

- Of course Nine Inch Nails (Still love Trent, even though he's engaged to a fucking moron)
- VAST (I reeeeeeeaaaaally hope Jon Crosby doesn't have aids... )
- Son Of Rust (I don't know why he isn't big. This band is great!)


Three Of Your Favorite Songs:

- "Highest Cost" by Son Of Rust
- "Swingset Chain" by Loquat
- "I'm Afraid" by Celldwerller


Three Things You Want In A Relationship:

- Acceptance for who I am and what I like
- A best friend
- To be cool with my friends
(Pretty much Victor)


Three Physical Things About The Preferred Sex That Appeal To You:

- I LOVE shoulders (Yes I do )
- Goatees (Yum.)
- Big dudes (I don't like scrawny, ripped dudes...)


Three Of Your Favorite Hobbies:

- Drawing ( As if you couldn't tell)
- Going out to play (Outside preferably)
- Gaming (That's why I'm fat C: )


Three Things You Want To Do Really Badly Right Now:

- Paint
- Call Sarah (I miss her! Fucking phone is disconnected!)
- Go out to the E.Q. again with Steven, Andrew, and V ("Fire and a view" says Steven)


Three Careers You're Considering/You've Considered:

- Art Teacher (dealing with kids sounds sooooo appealing, NOT)
- Embalmer (Seriously considered it)
- Something in gaming (I want to help create something that turns people into veggies!)



Three Places You Want To Go On Vacation:

- Japan (Who doesn't?)
- Germany (Amsterdam baby!)
- One of our coast (To enjoy a beautiful blue sea, maybe even a nude beach)


Three Kid's Names You Like:

- Desmond
- Jennetta
- Amber


Three Ways That You Are Stereotypically A Boy:

- I have a dirty mouth (Clean it up with Orbit!)
- I LOVE bugs (HAH Kitteh! You're a pussy!)
- I love to play outdoors (Like hiking, muding, swimming, camping, ect.)


Three Ways That You Are Stereotypically A Girl:

- I pay attention to how you say things more then what you say
- I love pretty things
- I'm a bitch


ummmm.......THE END

]]> ~UnderTheUmbrella http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/28830886/ http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/28830886/ Tue, 08 Dec 2009 17:22:28 PST
I was expecting to walk out with a sore heart and nothing in my hands but I was surprised at how easy it was to get in.

I know its a junior college and everything but it was too easy. So I'm now enrolled as a full time student, trying to get all my basics done even if they don't count for anything in Huston. At least I'll be in school, getting back into the rhythm.

I filled out my FAFSA the other night thinking I was going to get kicked in the ass but it was also a piece of cake. Not a single problem. I got an email about my SAR and had to go pic up some papers from Howard for the FAFSA. I was ready for the lady to spit out a bunch of gibberish telling me how I fucked up and how I need to do this 50 page packet on my parents income and shit but I walked out with 3 papers and a perfectly clear understanding of what I was to do with them.

So far, everything is fine. I'm pretty sure that when these papers are returned I'm in for the shit storm that I've been dreading this entire time.

Or maybe I'm paranoid....

Now time to get a flippin job! Fucking San Angelo. NO ONE is hiring but I'm still trying.

Christmas is coming up and I'm pretty happy right now

We put up the tree and decorations around the house. I never realized how much cats love Christmas stuff. I mean they get a whole new tree indoors to climb up and knock all the little shinny balls to the ground so they can run around with them. The lights are such a plus with Dolly. She decided she was going to be a Christmas tree and sat on top of the lights while we were testing them. It was funny to see her fur to light up in different colors while she was sitting there with a "wut?" face.

Oh yeah! I got my hair cut :3 I liek it. I liek it a lot.

Pics will be up soon! I love you guys sooooooooo much!


Till next time

]]> ~UnderTheUmbrella http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/28528664/ http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/28528664/ Mon, 23 Nov 2009 13:14:36 PST
Why is it that right when I put everything behind me and all is forgotten, a tiny piece of the shit form the past lands on my shoulder and just blows me back to square one.

Yeah I'm not going to lie just to look good and say everything is fine and dandy because its not. I'm still confused, angry, and hurt. I do get to points when it is in the past and I can move on but somehow things keep popping up and slamming me in my face with new details and new bull shit.

It was such a big aspect of my life and maybe you didn't realize that but it wasn't because I depended on you. Shit I did everything I could to stay out of your way unless it was an emergency. I learned the hard way that even then, it wasn't acceptable to ask for a favor. I tried to pay you back for everything that you had done for me before. It wasn't much but I tried. I loved you guys so much. That was my fault.

I made you my life, I trusted you with every aspect on my being. I aimed to make you happy if you had a shitty day. I did it so you felt better and I got to see you happy.

I wanted nothing less for my best friends.

But somehow everything became tangled up for me and it became numb for you. That is okay. You're happier now. You're better now. Shit is perfect for you now. You don't feel like you're needed constantly. You have all the time in the world for yourself.

Thats okay. I just want you to know that while you were still my friend, it was fucking awesome. Yeah, we were children back and I know you are embarrassed by it but that time in my life was amazing. I'm happy to say you guys made my past worth remembering. Worth missing.

In this journal I am only being selfish. I just needed to get a small piece of word off my chest so I can breathe once more.

By this time next year I will be gone. The plan is to move to Huston by next October. I know I had told some of you we would be going to Dallas but V and Kitty have family who live in Huston.

I'll give you guys for info on that when I get the chance. As for now thanks for the ear. Blogging helps me out tremendously.

]]> ~UnderTheUmbrella http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/28506941/ http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/28506941/ Sun, 22 Nov 2009 11:13:41 PST
I've turned in so many fucking applications and have called back trying to get interveiws but nothing is working. Everyone is already overstaffed or business is slow or they aren't hiring. Blah blah blah.

I went to Game Stop and put an application in there because I knew a few people who worked there. One was this guy who had worked there for over 2 years. Now I don't usually put names in the "people you know who work here" section because you never know where they stand with the management.

Well for this one time I did.

A week latter, the dude gets busted for stealing from Game Stop! Just my fucking luck. And on top of that, they got rid of their shitty bitch manager and got this really sweet one.

Oh well. My options now are Walmart, Taco bell, and all the other want-to-just-fucking-end it fast food chain restaurants.

They're always looking for new meat. For their staff and their food.

]]> ~UnderTheUmbrella http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/27619393/ http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/27619393/ Tue, 06 Oct 2009 16:48:55 PDT
ME!!!!!!!!

This is a game I've been wanting for four years now and I just found it! It is normally $30-$50 sometimes $100 online on eBay and amazon but I just found it for $2.99!!!!!

Now time for some bad luck.

]]> ~UnderTheUmbrella http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/27569409/ http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/27569409/ Sun, 04 Oct 2009 00:35:05 PDT
Took me 'bout 5+ hours, but I finally did it!!

I finally cleaned out my poor ipod of all the shitty music then replaced it with some kickin' tunes. Not only did my ipod get a nice bath but so did my Bibi, my lovely little hard drive. Organizing, renaming, moving, trashing, ugh!

I've been in need of some great music and thank goodness me and Kitty could put our heads together this week to snatch up some of the best.

Nothing makes me want to pick up that pencil like music so be on the look out for some new stuff.

My LIFE: Well, still looking for a job, still planning on attending ASU in the spring and still as sick of people as usual. Gotta love'em.

Twinkie, one of our cats, passed away after being hit by a car the other week. We had to put him down after finding him behind a tree. It was hard trying to explain to Abby why we had to let him go and why he couldn't heal from something like that. The vets sent us a letter in the mail the other day along with their prayers. They are such good people.

When I went back to live with my family, I thought things would be different and they are. NOBODY gives a shit. Well, Abby, Alexis, and Thayne do but forget the rest. Oh well. My family has never been, um... well, the family type. It can be a bit frustrating at times like when your sister is being verbally abused by her boyfriend and the parents are off doing stupid shit. I'm saddened but I've done what I could do. I just have to be there for Alexis and the little ones.

Speaking of, I made Lexy read Eyesheild (GREAT series btw!) so she and I were all pumped up about football and we went to Central's homecoming. Of course we lost and I didn't get to watch a good portion of the game because her friend that had joined us was chatting up a storm. From what I did see, though, was interesting, now that I get the rules. Football is something I don't think I'll be watching on tv anytime soon, but I'll be trying to get to any future live games with Alexis. You guys are welcomed to join me for the game or just companionship.

Me and V are still doing very well
I'm sad to say he is having as much trouble as I am... He is in college but everything else is working against us. Couples my age aren't meant to be fighting over the things we fight over. We're supposed to worry about that shit later in life. Oh well, life comes and goes and you take or you don't.

GAMES:

Fucking Gears of War. Do I have to say anything else? I love this game because it is so deep. It isn't just a game. It is a story. I couldn't begin to tell you about this game. You would have to see for yourself.

I would have to say Little Big Planet has the best soundtrack in the history of soundtracks! This game is just so fun to play, it is like crack. I haven't been that happy doing anything in my life for a very long time. Playing with Victor and Kitty made it 1000X's better My little bro and sis's were laughing their little butts off at the show we were putting on, smacking each other and dragging our fellow corndolls around the field.

GTA IV 100% great, 100% horrible, and all great music and cars. It is crazy addictive! Nothing like jacking the neighbor ladies car and shooting the preacher at the corner screaming about how he neeeeeeeds to SLAP you! All that and running away from a cop shouting cheesy vaginas. And you think I'm kidding.

and ART: Nothing big, just working on my anatomy. I do have one complete drawing I did to the song "The Night Starts Here" by Stars. It is one of two songs I like by them. I'll try to get that pic up soon.

I'm sorry if I haven't spoken to you guys in a while. Things have just been a bit crazy. I'm happy to have V and Kitty here with me while shit is bumpy. It's always good to have someone along for the ride. I don't know anybody else who are as beautiful as those two.

Well I'll wrap this up a video.

[link] <----- Check this out. It is amazing. It is a mashup between Nine Inch Nails and Rick Astley titled "The Hand That Gives You Up". It is amazing! He also provides a link for the mp3, get it. You know you'll want it, I sure did.

Thanks for the ear guys. I love you all and I hope you are all doing well.

Much love!

_Lyssa

]]> ~UnderTheUmbrella http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/26984168/ http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/26984168/ Wed, 02 Sep 2009 18:53:50 PDT
GRRRRRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!1


:hear: I love this man sooooo much!!!!!!




AND SOME AWESOME!!!!!!!












If you've seen any of Egoraptor's stuff, you would understand this. If you still haven't seen it, GO NOW. Just type in awesome on newgrounds and watch his videos. He is a fucking genius!

Or check out his Dart

ANYWAYZ, I'm a Gears of War nut now so yeah...you might be seeing some Marcus art up on here so beware!

]]> ~UnderTheUmbrella http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/26363748/ http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/26363748/ Mon, 03 Aug 2009 16:43:06 PDT
I've heard everything from the planet nibiru hitting/getting very close to lizard aliens coming back to earth to collect their gold (which they had taught us how to mine) and eating us ALL.

And you think I'm kidding.

So far I'm betting on lizards. Fuck yeah!

I'm interested in all of the stories, they're fun to read about even if they are just plain crazy. Maybe I'll even put up a pole.



I'm still holding you guys up on that end-of-the-world-orgy, but the world better fucking end. Otherwise it will just be awkward... VERY AWKWARD.



But seriously, gimme you're views on this whole thing and if possible, some reason behind your opinion.

]]> ~UnderTheUmbrella http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/26071476/ http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/26071476/ Mon, 20 Jul 2009 17:30:32 PDT If you guys have some that I don't have on here (which I'm sure you do) Please feel free to post them on here. Good god, I love these things!!






http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/25665784/ Wed, 01 Jul 2009 04:34:46 PDT - Had the worse cramps in my frikin life.
- Internet died and I didn't get it fixed until just now (6:12am)
- Found out I am missing much more then just my Anime Fest pics. Fuck me for scattering my pics around. My own fault.
- Had the tummy yuckies ALL DAY TODAY
- And when I did finally get on the puter, I was sadly disapointed. I shouldn't have gotten my hopes up... oh well.

+ Woke up and went to Denny's with Kitty.
+ Took a long nice nap and dreamed about being an assasin for Assasin's Creed (weird but awesome!)
+ Woke up again went to restroom to only have people banging on the bathroom door to surprise me with pizza, cake, and chips! You guys rock.
+ Mom called to wish me a happy birthday and dad sung a drunken song with the wrong name, but it was funny
+ My Dolly smells and feels nice because I gave her a bath.
+ THE FUCKING HOUSE IS SOOOOOOO CLEAN!!!!! I owe Kitty much smutt indeed
+ I got two cakes!
+ One was chocolate

Well it was quiet and small, which I am not used too at all but the few people who made today great was enough. I have to thank Kitty big time. She has been my shoulder lately and she totally pwned that house last night. Sarah bought me a beautiful cake and all the other things. V also bought me a cake (@^@ CHOCOLATE @^@) and good 'ol Steven popped in for a quick "Happy birthday..."

Thanks guys. Without you, I don't know where I would be.

]]> ~UnderTheUmbrella http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/25335069/ http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/25335069/ Mon, 15 Jun 2009 17:56:13 PDT I thought I would take a step out of my little normal box and play around. So far, it is really sticking. I love drawing men now... yum

ANYWAY!

My job at Carino's is finally over! God, I love ALL of the people there but I HATED the company. I mean how many people actually get to say my managers rock? It is now kinda getting weird. I'm glad I got out before things got too stressed. Damn new DM...

I'm now looking for another job. Who knows. Maybe something will come up.

But as for art, yeah. BE EXPECTING!!!!! I'm so excited!!!

Over and out kidos!

Luv ya

]]> ~UnderTheUmbrella http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/25021687/ http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/25021687/ Fri, 29 May 2009 19:38:24 PDT
I'm so confused right now. I know I should be sad or happy about leaving that place but I'm very numb. I'm not sure if it is because I'm tired...

Oh well...

I'm now living with Sarah Clark for all of you who didn't know. I'm quitting Carino's and finding another job. I'm searching for a cheap little car.

Wow...

I'm feeling a little bum right now.

I think I'll finish this journal when I'm feeling better...

Sorry guys.

Ps.
Spock + Kirk = Yum!

]]> ~UnderTheUmbrella http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/24282198/ http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/24282198/ Thu, 16 Apr 2009 21:29:30 PDT
Don't mind if I do :3

Now I'm not a very big first person shooter game person but, from the addictive storyline to the smooth game play, Bioshock has me in its grips. It is defiantly on my "must continue" list of games right with Mirror's Edge and No More Heroes. Bioshock starts you off in a plane crash and leaves you stranded in the middle of the ocean with nowhere to go except this tiny little lighthouse looking thing. Inside is a biosphere that takes you to a corrupted city under the ocean called Rapture. The place is filled with crazed citizens called Splicers, tearing up anything that comes their way. It's beautiful in a weird way but it really plays with your head whenever you're staring at a young girl with the options "harvest" or "rescue" on the screen. I'm not kidding. And I can't put it down.

But I've also checked out the new game for the Wii called Mad World and holy shit! Nintendo went from cute and cuddly to thorny and bloody. Mad World makes Grand Theft Auto look PG13. The game is primarily black and white except for the red blood that is constantly cover the screen and the few yellow controls. You play a man entered in a tournament. You're on an island that is blocked off and contaminated with some virus and the only way to get a vaccine is to kill someone, anyone. You play the protagonist, killing off thugs, ninjas, and even zombies.

Life Update:

Loving the new manager. He is probably the most entertaining man on this earth! He is queer and fucking here. Sarah Clark is up there now and sharing the joy of our bartender. We're slowly taking over. My favorite hostess left this week. I bought her a farewell cake and flowers. I don't think I've been so attached to anyone in such a short amount of time but she was sooooo fucking awesome! I'll miss that little booger.

Family is good. I have a little girly kitten named Dolly. I'm about to move in with Sarah. I'm still with that short Mexican they call Victor and I still love my girls Yes, I miss Kiki and the whole Holt family, but I've moved on. College is still a goal. I have my motorcycle license and my eye on a lime green Kawasaki Ninja 600. That isn't it but I'm too tired to continue so yeah

Peace out.

]]> ~UnderTheUmbrella http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/23668604/ http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/23668604/ Thu, 12 Mar 2009 22:19:21 PDT
Now I'm not sure.

I don't want the only thing I love to be a career. I don't want to kill it for myself or to become a snobby bitch over it. I love art right where it is for me. Just fun.

I'm really considering to be an embalmer or maybe a mortician. I never really thought about changing my career choice until I sat down with some chick at a party and started talking. I know I don't want to spend almost 6 years in college for some chance to make shitty pay babysitting. I know I want to stay on my feet like I do at Carino's. I don't want some meaningless job sitting on my ass.

Honestly, I've been researching it. I'm going to go to some funeral homes in town and see if I can't set up interviews with the funeral directors. I want to ask them about their jobs on a more realistic basis.

We'll see. Maybe it won't be the thing for me. Maybe it will be.

As for the current events,

I'm numb.

No candy coating. No beating around the bush.

I've received an apology for it but I'm still a little sore. I'm trying to find some new people. I've thought about moving to Nebraska again. I'm so bent up about everything, I'm not sure if I'm even awake right now. I know I do miss simplicity. I do know I miss being sure about everything. I miss my best friend. But not being a drama queen or trying to start shit or not even to make a point, but rather just speaking out of what I truly feel from my heart, I've been replaced.

I know that I haven't been around because of work, which is kind of ironic. The day before all this shit happened I was sitting in front of my managers about to break into tears begging them to give me at least two consistent days off so I could be with them. But now work is like an escape.

That is my fault though. I understand that much.

Thank goodness for the few I do have left. I'll hang on for dear life. Maybe things will change.


Ps. Please don't reply to this. I don't get on often enough to see anything. I might just end up closing this whole thing down. No need for it anymore.

]]> ~UnderTheUmbrella http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/22474042/ http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/22474042/ Thu, 08 Jan 2009 16:42:00 PST
I'm here at Sumi's.

I got so pumped up for this 4 FUCKING HOUR TEST!!!! I was like "Yeah!!! I'm gonna fucking punt this pig!!!" I was FINALLY going to get my TABC!!!!

BUT...

It needs flash...

It Cricket is being a Flash Nazi...

!#(@!()$(@!_($($**&!&!&~*!&@!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

FUCKINGCUNTNUGGETDOUCHEDARTLLAMALICKINGFUCKBALLOFSCREAMINGWARTNIPPLEDASSTART!!!!

I guess I'll just have to wait another blasted day...

(Nothing can describe the anger I have inside of me...)

On a sad note,

One of my managers is leaving today. Niel was the FOTH guy and the only guy with the guts to do what a lot of people wouldn't do. I'm going to miss that guy. Niel, always on his phone. Even when he was firing up a batch of good for a guest. And that awesome laugh that sounded like someone was either fucking or killing a duck. Either way he was a good guy. One of the three managers I was sooooooo lucky to have. They made a great team.

On a happy (or drooling and screaming) note,

MIRROR'S EDGE IS AMAZING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
OMGITISTHEBESTGAMEEVA!!!!!!

Seriously, guys, you get motion sickness and adrenaline rushes from just watching it. EVERYTHING IS PERFECT! E3 did one thing right last year when they voted it game of the year. Makes you wonder, what could be wrong?

NOTHING!

Oh, well maybe...

it's only 6 hours long... )

But the game play makes it just hard enough to take longer and there are infinite ways to get to different places.

It'll also be a trilogy so lets all cross our fingers for longer game play.

No More Heroes is great too. It is HILARIOUS!!!!!! I cel-shading.

]]> ~UnderTheUmbrella http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/22131277/ http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/22131277/ Mon, 22 Dec 2008 22:07:49 PST
So lets tell this one from the beginning.

I don't know why, maybe it was the free running or the whole shaved arms thing, but I looked his direction. He wasn't afraid to just be him. He was the sweetest most caring guy. I first told my best friends in French. "Hey... I think I like this guy..."

We talked more, then he started coming to my house. I ended up getting grounded for an entire month and he let me borrow Bleach (way before it was even popular). We would call each other everyday, laughing, talking about everything. We became the best of friends. Then I got my nerves up.

I told him in my sister's room while playing with my new batch of kittens. The first whit one he picked out, Zero. It was pretty lame... but somehow that night I went to bed smiling. Knowing he was "officially" mine.

But I wouldn't get too close.

Chicks before dicks and bros before hoes. But if your bro is your hoe? One of my best friends was my lover. But Sumi always came first. That was my mentality, and he seemed okay with that. He would do shit to make me so mad. I felt like I was dating a fucking kid! But one night, when I was ready to call it done, something clicked. "I don't care if he acts like a kid forever. That is who he is and I love him for that." Within a minute, I decided that I loved him. The "L" word had a lot of meaning to me but I truly meant it.

We went on for another year. I was a bitch to him. I made him fight for himself and I treated him like shit to get him to do it. I took it too far. I was too mean. I shouldn't have been mean at all. But it was what I wanted. Him to fight for his thoughts and morals and to never let anyone walk all over him. But I was a bitch. And I couldn't stop.

Here we are now, living together. Having a blast! Loving him more then ever. He is so beautiful...in the heart and in his physical features. He is my V. The man I finally told myself I was going to marry. But everything backfired. I was a bitch for far too long. I was always independent. I didn't want to have any boundaries. I knew where a natural relationships boundaries were. But there was more that I didn't take into account.

We fought.
and fought...
and fought.

We hit that bumpy road. But did anyone tell you that the bumpy road might lead to a cliff? No matter how prepared you are, it might just all come crashing down.

I'm not sure yet, but I think we've hit the bottom. I don't want to give up just yet. But it feels one sided. I'm trying, but he won't... or maybe just can't. I taught him to fight. No matter who it might be against, but just fight.

That's okay.

Maybe we've become bad for each other.

But dear god.

I'm not ready.

I can finally say yes, to the ring, to the commitment. But I'm not ready to give up my independence.

I thought everything was done, was on it's way to heal. I don't know. But I think it's time. It's time for the crash. I've tried. I don't know what to do now.

I'm not ready for this.

Not for this crash.

]]> ~UnderTheUmbrella http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/21624220/ http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/21624220/ Sun, 23 Nov 2008 02:35:54 PST
Work has got me running for my money (literally). Finally obtained my license and now looking for a decent car. That will be fun. I've been all over the place lately... work has been CRAZY. I couldn't be able to begin to speak of the drama that has sent me home crying and wanting to quit that horrid place.

But everything is calming down.

I'm feeling like shit right now as I type this. Partially because it is 4:00 am and partially because I had yet another fight with Victor. I am just sick of EVERYTHING right now. I need a vacation, a change in the same rhythm that has been playing in my life the past few months. I still love the good ol' gals that have been there in my life but I think I need a new friend or two.

I hate to say it right now, in a blog, instead of to her face but I miss Kiki. I miss the entire family. Thinking about them just brings me to tears but I'm so scared that no matter what I do, it'll never be the same.

On to a lighter note, the cold is finally creeping in. It is so nice! Walking at night and even during the day is tolerable now. I love where our apartment is at. It's just close enough to everything. Christmas and Thanksgiving are on their way. I know someone's Asian is gonna spend it in Seattle. Lucky little butt I wish I were at home in Omaha right now.

My drawing inspiration is coming back. I have some weird beauty and beast concepts popping up. I love the whole idea of the beauty and the beast. I'm still struggling with Disney and Luis Royo styles. Odd combination, yes? Oh well, something is coming out and it doesn't look half bad. That is all that matters! We'll just have to see if I'll post them. I'm still antisocial about my drawings right now.

Well I'm clocking out of this session. Good night jerks! Much love to you!

_Lyssa

Ps. Don't be getting all pissy about me not messaging you back. I now have an apartment, meaning no computer yet. Just letting you guys know now. The guys I told before this, don't worry. You got the message

]]> ~UnderTheUmbrella http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/20428321/ http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/20428321/ Wed, 10 Sep 2008 18:34:35 PDT
I'm not going to be on anything for a while. I finally got an apartment! But no internet and no computer, but hey! Gimme a ring if you wanna visit me and check out the new pad

763-2420

]]> ~UnderTheUmbrella http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/20042689/ http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/20042689/ Tue, 19 Aug 2008 14:00:05 PDT WARNING: DRAMA
If you choose to comment on this I WILL NOT explain it to you. Trust me, it isn't something you want to get into...

There goes another one. I don't think I can repair this one.

Sorry guys for posting this shit up in a journal, but I feel like sinking to that level right now. I know its also annoying, just ignore it. Once again, sorry.

This is the second rejection just because of blood.

Does your blood know as much of you as I do? They didn't CHOOSE to be there for you. Do you trust them as much with your secrets as much as you do me? I CHOSE to be there for you through thick and thin. I wasn't just born into it. I don't have to put up with your bullshit, but I still stayed. Because YOU WERE MY FAMILY. Or so I thought, but I'm not into the one-sided relationships.

My personal opinion of family is not as simple minded as blood or marriage but of dedication and love. How dare you put two different meanings to it? My biological father was never there for me, but yet his blood flows in my veins. According to you that makes him more important then family. WRONG! Blood doesn't mean shit unless a family is behind it. You were just lucky to have your blood be there for you. And as for your other friends being in this same "family", how close are you to them? You are placing me in the same category as them, yet (and correct me if I'm wrong) I was FAR closer to you then they.

What hurts me the most is that you would rather attack me JUST TO DEFEND BLOOD rather the be rational and try to work things out. Yes I got angry and yes I yelled, but it was out of defense! I did the same at my other house! And NO, I NEVER called you a bitch! I may have said quit acting like a bitch IN THE PAST but I felt so bad for it I never did it again and drew you a pic in apology. Also, "issue with your slothful habits" is not "you're lazy"! For Christ sakes! It was just my frustration with a few things she did. Now the one I loved so deeply, only getting half of the fucking story, hates me just for that stupid shit.

Like I said earlier, it's too easy to mess up again. SO I'm leaving it at this. I'm sorry I have failed yet another "friend". I thought we were closer then that. But fuck me for believing that maybe for once, blood doesn't matter. The fact that you are someone else's kid doesn't matter for once.

I guess this on my part mostly. I shouldn't have planted my happy little ass in your home and expected to automatically be family, or "blood". I shouldn't have expected that if I have an issue with one of you, it would stay one on one. I learned from this, though. I've learned that no matter how much you love someone like family, how you would take punches for them, die for them, or possibly just be there for them as a shoulder, an ear, or maybe just a safety deposit box for their secrets, it just doesn't match up to that liquid that flows throughout their veins. Doesn't even begin to compare. Because no matter what, blood will always be there.

I thought YOU of all people would understand.

_Lyssa

PS. I like how the main thing you were worried about when losing me was losing a bridge to all your other friends. Wow, that is just AWESOME! And if I'm wrong, you sure didn't hesitate to mention it.

]]> ~UnderTheUmbrella http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/19711339/ http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/19711339/ Fri, 01 Aug 2008 02:41:20 PDT
I wish I could go back and just laugh again.

I know I've lost too much time to try to put it back together so I'm just giving up. I'm done trying to get back all of the time. I'm sorry guys if I fail or have failed you. I'm so very sorry.

I do miss you. So bad it hurts. The one thing that has held me together all of these years were my friends, close and afar.

So for the people that are still with me, here is a late night thanks. I don't think you guys know just how amazing you are to me.

Sumi, my darling. Thank you for the delicate friendship you have provided me. Thank you for all those times you have covered me for meals and the amazing birthday/X-mas gifts (they were always my favorites). Thanks for the kick ass music and for getting me into the funniest shows like scrubs and robot chicken. Thank you for being so damn dedicated. Thanks for saying "Awesome!" or "Wow!" when you look at my drawings, it always made me so happy. Thanks for keeping my drawings for so damn long, it makes me feel like they're important to you. Thanks for showing me manga and then teaching me how to read it. Thanks for being so simple yet abstract. Thanks for the tiny smacks and pinches when I gave you raspberries and sitting in the dark and talking about old, embarrassing memories or giggling about each others day. Thanks for your bad memory so I can tell you about my dreams and stories over and over again. Thanks for helping me get my glasses and starting my XXXholic collection along with helping me complete the Nine Inch Nails one. Thanks for laughing at mistakes and being my girl to go to. Thanks for being my best friend.

Kiki, my sister. Thank you for the family you have showed me. Thanks for the mouth watering chicken fettuccine. Thanks for the amazing camp out parties, your open mindedness, and being their for people that have no one else to turn to. Thanks for that one spicy smoothy, as wrong as it was. Thanks for the honesty and getting me to try new things. Thank you for sharing the coffee and the lactose intolerance. Thanks for coming to me when your heart was hurting, I'm honored to be someone you can trust. Thanks for the Eddie Izzard and pissing off Mrs. Richardson with me. Thank you for being my first friend, first REAL friend. Thanks for the endless doodles and notes I can look back on when I'm older and we're far apart. Thank you for bringing me into your family.

Kitty, my angel. Thanks for finally coming back. Thanks for being so damn original and finding the oddest yet likable things and music. Thanks for finally opening up to me. Thank you for showing me that my TRUE friends will never go away. Thanks for listening and talking. Thanks for showing me what true willpower looks like. Thank you for just being you. Thank you for staying and helping me create another story with you. Thank you for being another dorky gamer I can relate to. Thanks for drawing, you have NO IDEA how much I love your art. Thanks for having such a pure heart yet such a naughty mind. Thanks for the most amazing and random cartoons, books, and facts you come up with. You're amazing.

Victor, my love. Thank you for loving me for WHO I AM. Thank you for listening and putting up with my shit. Thanks for sticking with me through the roughest times and never backing down. Thanks for walking me to the door every time you drop me off, trying to hold the car door open, holding my hand, cheering me up with those goofy voices and faces, and saying good night every night. Thanks for wearing the bracelet and necklace I gave you at the beginning of our relationship. Thanks for being you and not giving a flying fuck what anybody thinks about it. Thanks for being such a comic book nerd and sharing my love for Zelda. Thanks for getting me into western style comics instead of just sticking to manga. Thanks for accepting me and my weird life. Thanks for showing me a REAL tortilla and showing me EVERYTHING tastes better with them. Thanks for for taking it slow. Thank you for those nights we would sit on the car and just watch the stars. Thanks for waking me up in the morning with a phone call or a kiss on the forehead. Thanks for everything baby.

There is sooooo much I haven't even begun to mention in these short paragraphs but for everything, I just want to say thank you ALL for sticking with me. I hope I will never lose any of you.

_Lyssa

]]> ~UnderTheUmbrella http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/18922278/ http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/18922278/ Thu, 19 Jun 2008 00:34:15 PDT
I've lost many friends over the past years. I'm now trying to decide if it is time to give up grudges and differences and make peace with these people. I don't want to lose anymore and I don't want people to feel uncomfortable inviting two opposing people to parties... I just miss the old days.

So it is really important, if you read this, that you reply. Especially if you know we've left on a bad foot. I want to try to fix things before it is too late. I know time is running out for the group. Soon everyone will have jobs and other things to do. But Sumi just opened my eyes. It is time to get in touch.

Thanks.

]]> ~UnderTheUmbrella http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/18705041/ http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/18705041/ Fri, 06 Jun 2008 21:22:19 PDT
Sick of friends sticking other friends in the back.

No names but just be careful. People talk more then you think.

Let us all try this little thing and CONFRONT THEM FACE TO FACE instead of beating around the bush. If you need a few days, cool, but get to the point.

ANYWAY! On to other things!

Getting my shit straight now that I'm in a place I can think. God, I love my friends.

If I have been a bitch the last few weeks we have talked, guys, I'm sorry. I was stressed. But everything is all over, everything is good.

I'm working,

I've moved out,

got one hell of a sunburn,

but...

I'm happy.

Two year anniversary came up last week on the first. We're still going strong.

DRAWINGS!

They are coming kids! I've been re-inspired by this bad ass book V bought me as an anniversary gift. Oh yumm! Full of Luis Royo and tons of other beautiful artist. Spectrum 10. Check it, it is NEAT!

Oh yeah, food for thought, Howl's Moving Castle is terrific! The artist captured the natural human movement perfectly. Kiki and I were blown away!

Love ya guys!

_Lyssa

]]> ~UnderTheUmbrella http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/18623794/ http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/18623794/ Mon, 02 Jun 2008 09:00:23 PDT
To all you kids who've made a difference, thank you. I'm not going to make a false promise and tell you I'll see you again. I'll leave that up to fate, but I promise that I'll miss you. Stay true and don't let ANYONE tell you any different. Take care guys.

To the few who have always been there, this isn't for you.

You guys already know I'm not going to stop showing up at your doorstep anytime soon. (:

Much love kiddos, and feel free to contact me.

*muah*

]]> ~UnderTheUmbrella http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/17981719/ http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/17981719/ Tue, 22 Apr 2008 18:55:35 PDT
Life is nice right now...great friends, catching up in ceramics, won't have to take a single final exam, next week I get off, doing a painting on the amazing Sarah C's wall and another on Sarah E's door, and I'm just happy.

Few problems are now in the past. I don't give two shits and a fuck anymore, that is the secret my friends. The problem just doesn't matter to me. It's not apart of my life.

Drawings are soon to come! Cleaning them up currently. Sorry guys but my new love is ICP. >< I know, it's horrible!!!

Much love kidos!

]]> ~UnderTheUmbrella http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/17832752/ http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/17832752/ Sun, 13 Apr 2008 13:21:43 PDT
I am the girl kicked out of her home because I confided in my mother that I am a lesbian.

I am the prostitute working the streets because nobody will hire a transsexual woman.

I am the sister who holds her gay brother tight through the painful, tear-filled nights.

We are the parents who buried our daughter long before her time.

I am the man who died alone in the hospital because they would not let my partner of twenty-seven years into the room.

I am the foster child who wakes up with nightmares of being taken away from the two fathers who are the only loving family I have ever had. I wish they could adopt me.

I am one of the lucky ones, I guess. I survived the attack that left me in a coma for three weeks, and in another year I will probably be able to walk again.

I am not one of the lucky ones. I killed myself just weeks before graduating high school. It was simply too much to bear.

We are the couple who had the realtor hang up on us when she found out we wanted to rent a one-bedroom for two men.

I am the person who never knows which bathroom I should use if I want to avoid getting the management called on me.

I am the mother who is not allowed to even visit the children I bore, nursed, and raised. The court says I am an unfit mother because I now live with another woman.

I am the domestic-violence survivor who found the support system grow suddenly cold and distant when they found out my abusive partner is also a woman.

I am the domestic-violence survivor who has no support system to turn to because I am male.

I am the father who has never hugged his son because I grew up afraid to show affection to other men.

I am the home-economics teacher who always wanted to teach gym until someone told me that only lesbians do that.

I am the man who died when the paramedics stopped treating me as soon as they realized I was transsexual.

I am the person who feels guilty because I think I could be a much better person if I did not have to always deal with society hating me.

I am the man who stopped attending church, not because I don't believe, but because they closed their doors to my kind.

I am the person who has to hide what this world needs most, love.

I am the person who is afraid of telling his loving Christian parents he loves another male.

Re-post this if you believe homophobia is wrong. Please do your part to end it.

]]> ~UnderTheUmbrella http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/17137363/ http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/17137363/ Sat, 01 Mar 2008 18:15:54 PST
]]> ~UnderTheUmbrella http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/15937173/ http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/15937173/ Fri, 14 Dec 2007 21:22:31 PST
]]> ~UnderTheUmbrella http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/15836147/ http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/15836147/ Fri, 07 Dec 2007 15:07:41 PST

]]> ~UnderTheUmbrella http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/15621926/ http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/15621926/ Thu, 22 Nov 2007 13:38:02 PST
Green bean casserole =
Rolls =
Potatoes =
Not being there with you guys =

Seriously, I miss you guys so much. I'm going to try to give you guys a call tonight so I can hear your voices. I hope you guys are doing great today. It might not being doing too well for my vegetarians, but hey, I still hope you guys are having a kick ass day. Much love to everyone!!!!

_lyssa

Ps. HALO ROCKS ASS!!!!!!!!!!!! OMG!!!!!!!!!!!! Oh, and it's snowing!!!!

]]> ~UnderTheUmbrella http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/15563477/ http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/15563477/ Sun, 18 Nov 2007 13:50:58 PST
I love you guys!!!!!!!!!

]]> ~UnderTheUmbrella http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/14973670/ http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/14973670/ Mon, 08 Oct 2007 16:10:20 PDT
Lately I've been hearing a lot of bullshit and never from the same person and what I want to say is SHUT UP. I am so sick of the drama and two faced b.s. If you want friends, maybe you should treat them better instead of not talking to them, then getting pissed off at them for not talking to you. People are not going to just lay down and let you walk all over them. You can't just treat them like shit one day then act like everything is fine the next. You're an idiot! You have no orignality, you're a leech. You're a selfish, lying, hurtfull person who is just going to keep loseing friends until maybe one day you'll get the fact that people have feelings and they don't like taking shit. And one more thing, get over it. You'll probably not read this, who cares. Just somthing that I need to get off my chest.

To another person and I have a pretty good idea who you are, quit stirring the pot. You're blowing things out of perspective and causeing problems. Just step back and quit going around telling people things that are not true. Hurtfull names and things, umm...yeah...whatever. You have the wrong person. Maybe you should listen more carefully before you go off flopping your mouth. If this is you, then this goes out to you. And you know who you are.

People I left names out of this because anyone and nobody can be subject to this journal.

Now on to the good stuff.

I am so proud of the ACC! They are so awsome!!!!! I had everybody but three people show up to the poster day. Kudos guys!!! Keep it up.

I'm going to try to make a deviant art for ACC because it's school friendly, easy, and the notices show up better. So beware!!!!!!!!!!

Pics should be coming soon, so look forward to that.

That is all for today, I'll check up tomorrow.

]]> ~UnderTheUmbrella http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/14166523/ http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/14166523/ Tue, 14 Aug 2007 14:44:28 PDT 2: English 4 KILLINGSWORTH
3: Economics WILSON
4: Painting SHELTON
5: Ceramics MORGAN
6: Computer Animation MARVEL
7: Computer Animation MARVEL

I guess no AP portfolio with Caroline...But hey. I GOT 3D ANIMATION!!!!!!!!!!! WEW!!!!!!!!!!!

]]> ~UnderTheUmbrella http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/13998063/ http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/13998063/ Fri, 03 Aug 2007 08:06:33 PDT
Caroline's B-day pic
Fan Art: Van & Tyke, Middna
Sarah C's Mermaid
Guys from a dream
My girls
Tyke (remix)
Sniper (remix)
Kiki's Witch
Sumi's Moth

That's like half of them...I'm trying though! Well if you haven't found out already, Kiki is back! Yay!!!! I'll try to get something in the next time I'm chill'in with my Sum.

]]> ~UnderTheUmbrella http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/13640329/ http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/13640329/ Fri, 06 Jul 2007 22:28:34 PDT
Past: Well, my birthday was awsome! I had a small party with me, Sumi, Kitty, and the boys. Just chill'n and throwing shit at each other. God I love my friends sooooooo much! I got Sims 2 for the PC, Gumi ear buds, the new Nine Inch Nails C.D. (SOOOOO FUCKING AWSOME!!!!!!!!) and a live concert of NIN! *drool* I love them all! But fuck the presents when you can grab a chance at seeing Steven, Ricky, and Victor smack each other with t-shirts, pillow cases, and bandanas. Oh man, thats great stuff!

Present: I'm trying sooooo hard to get some drawings up people! I'm sorry! I'm currently kicking back at my Sumi's casa, sipping cherry limade slush, and watching family guy. I wish Kiki were in town. I miss you!!!! Cookie needs to give me his number so I can talk to him! Oh, and hey peeps! It's Caroline's birthday today!!!!! WEW! Got my arm burned by a 12-year-old kid today. Fucking awsome. I was really proud of Victor today. He showed his mature side. I'm so proud of him. Thanks babe.

Future: I'm geting off my ass tomorrow and getting a job at CiCi's. I need money to help throw the big party in August practically everyone is invited to. Hopefully Kimmy and Becky can make it...I miss them sooo much! I'll be putting up a birthday pic for Caroline soon so keep an eye out for that. Victor won't be on for a while unless he's at a friend's house or something. Computer is no longer at his house until...next month I think.

Well here is a list to SOME of the people who are invited. Please don't ask me when the party is because I'm not sure yet. If you'd like to make some suggestions note me, don't put it on my comment page.

Sumi
Victor
Kitty
Kiki
Cookie
Steven
Jasmine
Ricky
Jacob
Braden
Joey
Heather
Briann
Kimmy
Becky
Daniella
Jenny
Caroline (if she can)
Sarah Clark
Sarah Roper
Ect...

Suggestions welcome please!

]]> ~UnderTheUmbrella http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/12525524/ http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/12525524/ Mon, 09 Apr 2007 13:37:31 PDT
The title was "Your fear is hurting me" and futured a pic of a girl next to it. I just thought, "Oh, it's just one of those I'm different beacause of some dissease or mental dissability articles." but no. It was about a lesbian who was discrminated by her whole school and even her close friends.

I can't even begin to discribe how wrong I think it is for someone to hurt or hate another person just because they have a different prefference. I don't care if that is just your "opinion" or whatever, it's closed minded. And the bull shit where they say "Well I just feel uncomfortable around them." yeah, whatever. What are they going to do? Infect you?

People need to grow up and quit oppressing others, then standing behind the reason of God. I don't think God is so petty to send someone to hell for loveing the wrong person. And if anyone finds evidence that says gays are wrong, show it to me please. And I want it straight forward. No "well this says this, so it means this" bull shit.

Anyway, to all the people out there who supports whats right, go silent on April 18th. To check what I mean go to [link]

April 18th is a nationwide thing that is held with students and teachers to fight against gay and lesbian discrimination.

You can also go to [link] to buy "Erase Hate" wristbands (3 fo $10) to support. Matthew Shepard was killed at the age of 21 because he was gay.

Also check out [link] to support.

Please help send the right message to people all around and stop this useless hate.

_Lyssa_

]]> ~UnderTheUmbrella http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/12262073/ http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/12262073/ Tue, 20 Mar 2007 17:44:00 PDT
RANT!!!!
Not mentioning names here unless I really don't like you but I must get it out! I hate stupid lazy people! I swear! I have some kick ass teachers, you know the ones who are the sweetest people and I'm in that class with a bunch of ass holes who have no respect for her and give her the hardest time in the world.
On top of that I have a friend who is so awsome and gives people their full respect but can't seem to get it back from another person. Seriously people, grow some balls! Then Spanish class, jesus! That idiot teacher won't dare put up with the hommies who take down the clock and change the time or have their cells out texting, but she seems to hold the referals when it comes to this loud kid who disturbs the class and we have maybe 10 min to work and she even keeps us back after school. The kid is due for suspension of school because of how much he fucks around. The hommies have nothing compared to this skinny jackass. Oh and don't forget the typicall rude bitches who won't shut their mouth, saying shit like "Stupid devil worshiper" to one of the nicest people I know (though he can get a lil annoying) or calling my teacher names when she's been very nice to us, just because she's a lil odd. If I ever hear my friends doing that shit without haveing a reeeeaaaallllly good excuse, I would be heart broken...

RAVE!!!!!
KITTY'S B-DAY IS TODAY EVERYONE!!!!!!! SING TO HER TOMORROW IF YOU HAVEN'T ALREADY TODAY!!!! Now I have to think of what to get the girl....*ponders* V and me are going on the 10 month mark! Wew! Love ya darling! Sumi is Sumi ^^ She's the best thing to tease and make mad but even better to talk to or hang out with. Without her I'd be down in the shit. Kiki and Chris *evil smile* Them two are adorable! Who ever knew Kiki would end up with a tall phili dude (I KNEW IT!!!!!!!) Hah, and she said she didn't believe us! Boo yeah! One for Lyssa and Zero for the cupcake! What are you guys at now? 4 months? Ah and then Caroline. Through our bumpy friendship, we're pulling through now. She's still the spazz I've always loved. I still miss that raptor scream^^ Wow, school is almost coming to an end...after this one more year to speand with these amazing people. That makes me sad. I don't want to get out of school but college is waiting. ASU man!!!! We miss you down here Becky Mitts! Oh and if anyone hasn't found out yet, we have the guys here...
<- Le Steven!
<- Ze Jacob!
<- Fe Ricky!
Add them to the list, they'll entertain you with intresting photo manipulation, funny comix, and smart ass remarks.

SHAVE!!!!!!!
Well, I'm coming to an end. I'm trying to get a story together and some pics. I'm trying guys...Well I must go, much love!

_Lyssa

]]> ~UnderTheUmbrella http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/11281760/ http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/11281760/ Mon, 01 Jan 2007 22:03:46 PST
It only feels like weeks.

I believe love is not felt at first. Love is something that grows over time. I once heard a quote:
"Love without friendship is like a mansion built on sand."

Over this time, I've felt a lot of doubts, but I got over that. Each day I love him more and more. Who would have ever thoght that the short little guy who drew amazing pics and did flips would be holding my hand and huging me close telling me how much I mean to him. Leaving messages on my phone telling me he loves me and playing songs. It may sound cheesy, but in the end it makes me blush when I'm sitting in bed at night playing them back.

So, thank you Victor. I love you so much. Happy new years and happy aniversery.

I love you babe.

P.s. This is my message to you.

]]> ~UnderTheUmbrella http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/11202709/ http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/11202709/ Tue, 26 Dec 2006 16:02:47 PST Woke up, got to open up the new Zelda game and a cell phone (ze slice!) It got better when I actually started playing it, absolutely stunning! I was missing the V but Sumi and I went to go see him late last night.

As for the art, I'm really sorry guys. I don't know what is wrong with me. I'm trying realy hard to jump back in there. I've been sketching little pics, nothing big.

God, I love people.
I love the way they act. I love it the most when they do shit that you know they will do. I'm currently watching this lady get a grilled chesse sandwich tatoo on her chest. That's just one of the stupid things I've seen, heard, or read this week.

A new year is comeing up.
It sucks when you lose friends, but you lose some and you gain some. Someone very special is comeing back. I can hardly wait to see that smiling face. I'm currently gaining back a friend I was foolish to let go. That spunky little butt is currently in New York, getting a new camera to take pictures of her paintings. I'm pretty content with meh buddies this year. I love NIP ^^

I still have to get Sumi her gift and Sarah a card. Maybe get Caroline a lil somth'n.

Oooh! I got me a pretty little grey hamster named Bugg (V named her, Sumi thought of the spelling).

Sumi got me into the funniest show in the world. Scrubs has to be the best show in the world! Man, I love Dr. Cox.

Well, I's gotta be off.
Chow babes!

]]> ~UnderTheUmbrella http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/10781979/ http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/10781979/ Sun, 19 Nov 2006 19:32:33 PST Victor has finally got a Deviant art account!!! Find him here at

Wew!

]]> ~UnderTheUmbrella http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/10350647/ http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/10350647/ Tue, 10 Oct 2006 17:47:25 PDT
Well hello there my fellow equals. Long time no see. I just got out of a giant artist block, I'm doing fairly well in school (except for Algebra 2, the teacher sucks BUT I'm still passing ^^) And I'm pretty stable in my social life.

As for the lovely art, I have gotten one pic done, and I'm working on a few for some friends for their birthday.

I love meh buddies.

This year has been a lil rocky, nothing too bad. I, or me and another person, broke one of the windows in the theater building. At first it was "aw, SHIT!!!" Now it's "AHAHAHAH!!!!" Just another thing to lok back on and laugh at. I love those moments. Teachers are great, weather is starting to cool down, my art mojo is seeping back into my pitiful soul, and I'm in love with life.

Kudos for:
Sarah C. and her art. You're getting better by the second!
Sumi, cause you're the best thing in the world.
V, cause I couldn't live without you.
Kitty, cause you're so damn cute.
Kiki, cause you are such a comic book geek and I love that.
And everyone else who is still smiling.

Now that I'm done loveing on yous guyses, I can start with the "stuff"

I'm trying to get something going. Maybe a comic. I'm working in the humour/cute/romantic department. No more gory, corny Vamps. for me. Unless its in the humour/cute/romantic department O.O. I'm done with Veronica and Kyoko, as in serious storylines. We'll just see where this goes, if it even moves.

Well, I must go. Much love to the rest of ya.

P.S. FOR THE SAN ANGELO GROUP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
THE HALLOWEEN PARTY WILL PROBABLY BE NOVEMBER 4TH UNLESS SOMETHING HAPPENS. IT WILL BE A HALLOWEEN THEMED BUBBLE GUM PARTY! IF YOU HAVE ANY QUESTIONS, WRITE ME A NOTE OR CALL ME.

]]> ~UnderTheUmbrella http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/9555603/ http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/9555603/ Mon, 31 Jul 2006 14:49:14 PDT
My mother's best friend (whom we now call our aunt) came down to visit. I was saying "Aw, SHIT! More family...-_-" Weeeeelllll, that mood changed quick. She's such a kick ass person. ^^ She's a bit of a smart ass and her and mom just fit so well together! Tis crazy! Well, she is now leaving, and she is taking the last of our batch of kittens (the small fluffy black one who looks like someone electricuted him). She also spoiled us to death @.@ Me, and my other two sisters now have digital cameras! Well on to other shit that doesn't mean anything.

I miss Sumi.

Everytime I think of going out with Sumi I have to keep reminding myself that she isn't in town. I know she's haveing such a kick ass time in Maine (or on the way there) I've been keeping up with the journals .

But then I have Victor to keep me company.

So I'm not complaining too much. He's such a doll! I'll get some pics of him up here soon.

Speaking of getting stuff up here, I'm currently working on two colored pics that will go up here, promise. I'm also working on a storyline to go with the pics. I'm trying to work among the "demented children's stroy" thing since I haven't seen anyone do one of those. Plus I was quite inspired by Alice in Wonderland.

So we'll see where that goes. Well once again, meh Kiki is on here and work'n so come and get her

Luv to all you kids and hopefully this new stuff will make up for the lost time.

-Lyssa ]]> ~UnderTheUmbrella http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/9522343/ http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/9522343/ Fri, 28 Jul 2006 11:48:19 PDT She only has one pick up, but be sure to watch for the cuddley halarious "Stitches and Patches" comixs! ^^ Luv to every one! ]]> ~UnderTheUmbrella http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/9362547/ http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/9362547/ Thu, 13 Jul 2006 08:28:45 PDT
And I'm currently forceing myself to draw. Not only that but I'm trying to get into pastels. The thing that really got me was the fiance of my cousin. She was talking about how she was an artist and stuff and I was telling her I was a cartoonist. I had just mentioned my artist block when she told me that she's been haveing one too. I asked her for how long know and she said for years now. She said that she hadn't touched any of her art for many years and that she just quit. I got me thinking, what if I never draw agian. This block has been going on for quite some time now. I'm trying my best to get myself out of it now.

So there sould be some new stuff coming in.

Hopefully...

Stuff has been happening, good stuff. Stuff that you wouldn't really care about hearing so I'll leave that to a personal conversation between you and me.

My thanks go out to kitty for saying happy b-day (I forgot to thank you specialy) and to everyone else for being able to come. I still need to get you, Skee, and bring you over to meh house! ><

But back to art. I hope to get some stuff up here soon. Sorry guys...I'm just-a-slack'n. We need some more tags around here -_-. *sigh* ]]> ~UnderTheUmbrella http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/9188160/ http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/9188160/ Mon, 26 Jun 2006 10:48:07 PDT
#1: I have no internet. Well I do but my dad won't put it on our puter, so I'm stuck useing a puter at work during breaks. *sigh*

#2: I've been haveing the worse artist block and to make it worse, I can't even bring myself to TRY to draw. I'm hoping everything will go back to normal when school starts. I haven't been able to find inspiration or anything.

So dats the shit that's been pissing me off. Nothing really too big. I've been one happy girl other then that stuff. As for the artsist block crap, I'm seriously sorry I haven't been getting anything up. I truly think its due to the lack of inspiration. Victor (A lovely friend of mine) had me going to a few days, but I lost it again. >< I'm trying! Well, I'll talk more when I have the time.

Oh, and for the people in San Angelo, I'm haveing a B-day party on the 30th of June (this comeing friday) Starts at 5 and is a sleepover. Send me notes for mor info. I'll be getting a hold of the ones who gave me their number. ]]> ~UnderTheUmbrella http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/8924951/ http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/8924951/ Tue, 30 May 2006 21:15:31 PDT ~UnderTheUmbrella http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/8867217/ http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/8867217/ Wed, 24 May 2006 18:58:01 PDT
Computer has been dead for a while...too many messages to keep track of, so I decided to play the easy way, and erase them all. I'm sorry guys! ><

New pics will be comeing shortly. I'm trying hard to get some pics to some graduateing friends and moveing teachers. The good lord only knows how they've saved me. And I'm trying to get some shit done for meh Sumi and Sarah Clark. Just some simple thank yous for what they've been doing for me. You guys rock.

School is almost over, I'm upset. I hate the summers. The only good it does for me is extra sleep and extra drawing time, things I don't really need. *sigh* Oh well. Life goes on, you meet new people, lose old friends. It's depressing, but I'll get over it. I'm not really looking forward to next year, seeing that Natalie, Becky and Patrick will be gone. But I still have my Sumi, and that makes everything okay. Since I'm being emo right now, I really want to thank Sumi. You kick so much ass.

Well enough of that. I'm developeing some new stuff, getting rid of the dark look. Adding someing fun, not dramatic. And who better to do that then a bunch of sexy guys, most which are gay. Inspired by Skee and Patrick, I'm comeing up with a whole new line of CRAP! Yay! Hopefully I can get that up asap. That'll be a nice summer project.

New obessions:
1. Asian dudes (*sigh* Once again...)
2. Mana off of Malice Mizer (Too pretty to be a man)
3. Latin techno (Damn you Patrick ><
4. Kingdom Hearts II ()
5. Drawing men ( again)
6. Disney (I can't help it!)

Yes, and about Kingdom Hearts II, PLAY IT! I can't even begin to describe how fun it is. I'm so into disney now. I wasn't truely opened up to how good some of the movies are until now. The older ones were just pretty, though cheesey. Now, they're so good. Ahhhh, and Sora and Roxas... My god. It's so amazing. Axel happens to catch my eye. I love how everything in that game is soooooo cartoony, stretching from how long the arms are to the size of the feet. Square Enix has became one of my favorite designers.

Well, I'll quit wasteing your time. This has just turned into a huge ramble fest... Sorry guys. Well I luv you all! I'll try to get some more kick ass shit up! Au revoir! ]]> ~UnderTheUmbrella http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/8718330/ http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/8718330/ Tue, 09 May 2006 08:12:52 PDT tagging.

Finish the sentences......

1. My ((most recent)) ex is: not to be discussed.

2. Maybe I should: Finish my biology work…

3. I love: yaoi

4. I don't understand: Why Caroline doesn’t like manga

5. I lose: my erasers ALL the flip’n time!

6. People say: stupid shit

7. My Love is: my little miss Sumi!

8. Somewhere someone is: thinking about how they didn’t

9. I will always: find they way people react to someone randomly screaming funny

10. Forever is: friendship

11. I never want to: see my friends change

12. I think the current President is: no comment

13. When I wake up in the morning: I think of the most random shit!

14. My past was: not to be discussed due to how stupid I was.

15. I get annoyed when: People ask me about my drawings before I’m done with them. “where’s her other eye?!” :twitch:

16. Parties are for: Making people happy and not for sex, drugs, or alcohol. You shouldn’t need those enhancements to make a party fun. All you should need is a string a foil ball and a room full of NIP.

17. My dog is: a big headed freak

18. My cat is: much prego!

19. Kisses are the best when: when they are sweet short goodbyes or hellos (I kiss everyone all the time, but NO tongue…:gag

20. Tomorrow: is AASU

21. I really want: SLEEP!!

22. I have low tolerance for people who: are closed minded.

23. In public: is a fun place to kiss Kiki.

24. Today: I have to finish a poster for Becky.

25. My last dream was about: Cody, kiki and Patrick. Something about Patricks shoulders…and I think I kissed Kiki O.o

26. I suck at: singing…

27. I'm going to: kick somones ass next year if she decides to keep yelling at meh buddies.

28. This time next week: I’ll be failing French.

29. I never knew: How pretty Patricks and Cody’s eyes where.

30. I really need: To start working on this French project…

31. Random quote: “God, I’m hot.” Seen on a thought bubble that Lyssa is holding above Kiki’s head.
you be up, sweety! ]]> ~UnderTheUmbrella http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/8717749/ http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/8717749/ Tue, 09 May 2006 06:31:07 PDT < Well I don't know how long it'll be up but I'm not complaining. Here be 33

Three things that scare me:
1. Pigs (Real life oinkers)
2. One of my friends moving away. It tears me apart to no end.
3. Ranches

Three People Who Make Me Laugh:
4. Sumi (oh my god)
5. Victore
6. Cody

Three Things That Make Me Laugh Out Loud:
7. People and the random things they do
8. Cody and his clickers
9. Thought bubbles

Three Things I love:
10. Small clear glass things
11. My friends (more then you’ll ever know)
12. Color

Three Things I hate:
13. Close minded ass holes who don’t have anything better to do then find the most idiotic things to dislike or even hate about people
14. The twisted perception of love
15. People who slit their wrist to get attention *cough* emos

Three things I don't understand:
16. Homophobes
17. My parents
18. Other peoples parents

Three things on my desk: (currently in BCIS class)
19. My makeup bag which is now used for colored pencils and other various art supplies
20. Sketch-book (sitting under keyboard)
21. mouse

Three things I'm doing right now:
22. Finishing up tags
23. Singing “Ava Adore” in my head along with the Prozzak song “Sucks To Be You” (I love Simon and Milo!!!! )
24. Trying to concentrate on getting all my taggings done… ><

Three things I wish I was doing right now:
25. Sleeping
26. Playing either Sims 2 or Harvest moon
27. Playing Zelda Majora’s Mask….I know…I’m in love

Three things I want to do before I die:
28. See the ocean
29. Actually see Sumi get married
30. Sell a GOOD piece of art

Three things that make me cry:
31. Friends moving away
32. When I get angry
33. When people I love change…

Person I tag es ]]> ~UnderTheUmbrella http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/8707362/ http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/8707362/ Mon, 08 May 2006 05:51:11 PDT ~UnderTheUmbrella http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/8679111/ http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/8679111/ Fri, 05 May 2006 06:41:12 PDT 1) What's your character's name?
Marcus

2) How old is he/she?
20

3) Is your OC a boy or girl?
He’s a silly little boy ^^

4) What's his/her race?
Mexican and German, has a little Italian

APPEARANCE
1) Would your character get a whole lot of stares in the "real world?"
I don’t know, he’s pretty normal just walking on the streets, listening to music…well…maybe….he tends to randomly dance.

2) Is your character considered normal in his/her own world?
I would say, he’s considered himself.

3) What would be his/her most recognizable feature(s)?
His eyes. Bright purple eyes.

4) Would you consider your OC as attractive?
Yup ^^ I luv my men.

PERSONALITY
1) Temper?
No, pretty laid back. No need to get upset about anything he can’t control.

2 ) Does your character ever get depressed?
Hardly. He always has that lazy smile.

3) Leader or Follower?
He does his own thing and no one has any say about that.

4) What is the main aspect of his/her personality?
His fun loving quality and his attitude towards life.

HISTORY
1) Did your OC have a family of any sort? If so, are they still alive?
Yeah, but they don’t really communicate. He’d rather live life to the fullest then be tied down to religion like his family.

2) Is your character out on his/her own? If so, why?
He has Trent and Nicky with him. Sumi also finds her way around him.

3) Has he/she encountered any traumatizing events?
Yeah. Who hasn’t?


4) What was probably the best time in his/her life so far?
When he finally moved out to be on his own.

ROMANCE

1) Single?
Yup. Shouldn’t be though.

2) Had your OC developed any romantic relationships?
Tried to. Always gets turned down. Has a huge crush on Nicky.

3) Virgin?
Ummm….I’m not sure…I say no.

4) Does your character like flirting?
Sometimes. Not as much as it the past. Sumi ends up having to hit him a lot.

SYMBOLISM
1) What animal would you associate your OC with? (Sorry, no creatures of myth and legend allowed!)
Cat or an owl

2) Musical Instrument?
Chello

3) Element?
Fire

4)Planet?
Saturn (His favorite)

1) Do you draw your character?
He’s my main thing now, but I’ve been having some trouble.

2) Do you write about him/her?
Not much as of now.

3) Do you use him/her in any rpgs?
Not yet. He’s still fresh.

4)What other ways have you appreciated your OC?
Well, he’s been fun to play around with. Individuality plays a big role in the way he’s built.

RANDOMIZE!
1) Is your character wanted for anything?
yeah…He’s a smart ass and loves trouble.

2) What are three weaknesses in him/her?
-Girls
-Saying the right thing at the right time.
-Food


3) Strengths?
-Dancing
-Making people smile
-Making an ass of himself

4) Does your OC drink or smoke (ect.)?
Smokes occasionally. Doesn’t drink very often.

5) What's one quirk about him/her?
He has a habit of collecting bottles.

6) Does your character have any phobias?
Screwing up horribly in front of someone who he is attracted to.



7) What could you do to get him/her into a blind rage?
If anyone he loved was hurt or if anyone stole or broke his bottles.

8) Does your OC like chickens?
*laughs* He loves them ^^ That and finches

THE FINAL QUESTION
What would you consider your relationship with your character to be like?
Nothing too special. I would cling on to him like no other. >< I love red hair.

I tag lilmisstake. ]]> ~UnderTheUmbrella http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/8614110/ http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/8614110/ Fri, 28 Apr 2006 17:34:58 PDT tagged me (She's so cute! Go check her out!) So here I go!

6 Weird habits/things about yourself

1. I always have to have a pencil, paper, or an eraser in my hands. I try to not take them with me, but I'll even find myself with one of the three or all in my hands at a movie theater or resturant. I've gotten better at that. And if it's not that it's some kind of drawing tool (pens, crayons, markers, etc...)
2. I have a thing for gotees and small clear glass things.
3. I can NEVER finish a picture. Even when it looks done, SOMETHING will be unfinished.
4. Pigs (real life ones, not the pudgy ones off of invader zim) scare me.
5. When I get really excited about something, I gnaw on my nails. I was doing really good till this weekend.
6. I'm scred to death of getting lost or someone forgetting me. I can't walk through a store by myself without getting that sick feeling a panic in my stomache and I get so paranoid about my mom or friends forgetting to pick me up from somwhere...

The six people I tag...
]]> ~UnderTheUmbrella http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/8482553/ http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/8482553/ Sat, 15 Apr 2006 19:56:53 PDT 's to all! ]]> ~UnderTheUmbrella http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/8418928/ http://UnderTheUmbrella.deviantart.com/journal/8418928/ Sun, 09 Apr 2006 15:06:48 PDT < It's been forever sence I got a drawing done, and now I'm stumped again. I've been working on a drawing for Grim for (litterelly) 10 hours! I've gone through 8 copies, all in which are fucked up and I'm starting to lose inspiration. I got home after I went to hastings and worked on it till 2:00 am. (I got home around 6:00 or 7:00, I can't remmber) woke up around 11:00 or twelve, continued on it till now. I HATE HAVEING AN ARTITST BUG!!! >< I'm also trying really hard to do a pic for Lilmisstake, but once again, got stumped, and I haven't even tryed to touch Cylen and sinner for Kitty. I might just start working on them *sigh*. Maybe I need to find insperation, that or get a lot of shit off of my chest. I don't know. I did get one pic done to throw up here, but I have to wait to get that scanned. I want to get a back ground put into it, but I'm not good at back grounds. I might have Cody help me out there. Him or Victore....*ponders* oh well. Hopefully the bug is only for today. I'm quite happy I FINALLY got to see Caroline in....I don't know how long. I thank god for Sumi. Without you love, I would have never got to see her. Or ever got to have a good laugh as I watched you try to squeak. I lurve ya! But it was sooooo good to see Grim. She's still as hyper as ever! Those couple of hours I got to spend with her ment so much, seeing the fact that I don't get to see her very often. Anyway, moving on. I apologize once again for the horrible lack of updates. Hopefully, that'll change soon. Luv ya guys!
Oh! By the way, Brokeback Moutain was pretty damn cute! But it's sad. I won't ruin it, but GO SEE IT!!! ]]> ~UnderTheUmbrella