http://search.deviantart.com/?q=by:VileShock&section=today deviantART RSS for by:VileShock en-us Copyright 2010, deviantART.com Fri, 01 Jan 2010 11:12:27 PST deviantART.com http://blogs.law.harvard.edu/tech/rss http://s.deviantart.com/minish/widgets/apple-touch-icon-precomposed.png http://VileShock.deviantart.com/journal/10695828/ http://VileShock.deviantart.com/journal/10695828/ Sun, 12 Nov 2006 00:16:30 PST
So, Im going to use that from now on Kelly. Its better for my purposes, besides like you said, you wont delete you myspace account anyways even tho myspace is crap to begin with overall.

so you should probably subscribe to it if you want to know when I write in it.

]]> ~VileShock http://VileShock.deviantart.com/journal/10685619/ http://VileShock.deviantart.com/journal/10685619/ Sat, 11 Nov 2006 01:34:52 PST
Been fighting constantly with the one person that I love, so much that she's doubting our relationship. Doubting the fact whether or not we'll last or not. Doubting if we'll even get to where I want to be with her. Her with my ring on my finger and her in my arms forever.

well, lemme explain how we started first off.

I run this clan/Guild called Assassins of The Damned, my nickname is "Shock" which I got from a Fear Factory ablum by the name of Obsolete... That was my first metal album and I immediately feel in love with two songs on that CD, "Edgecrusher" and "Shock" my first being "Edgecrusher".
I orignally gamed by the name "Dark Soul" which I got from my friends, my highschool Freshman year when we played StarCraft in the library.

but anyway,

She came round about middle of January and I was two months into a pit, a complete depression. She and a couple buddies of hers came round and started hanging out on our Teamspeak Server and playing Halo with us. I woke up early the first morning they came round because I had a nightmare and woke up. Couldnt get back to sleep so I turned my computer on got into TS. Went into the lobby channel because there was people that I didnt know in there along with one of the clan members (The 1) They all were playing Halo. I just sat there silent. I always keep my mouth shut unless I have something to say.

1 said good morning to me so I flipped the mute on my mic off and mumbled "hey"...I played Halo with them for about 5 mins in that channel before depression overcame me again and I slipped silently down to the channel that we called then The "Council" channel. Turned up the music that I was listening to and continued to play and attempted to get ahold my myself again...

A few more times like that with Her and I being in the lobby channel and me slipping down into the council channel and she started to bother me to drag her down to the channel that I was in. Apparently she knew something was wrong with me and started peppering me with questions about what was wrong...I told her little by little each day that I would get depressed and go to a channel to be alone.

Evenually something happened between one of her friends and herself and he began to harrass her and put her into tears time and time again. Now not only do I not appreciate that kind of shit going on in our server but also she was starting to grow on me.
I felt like I had a obligation to help her. Which I did my best to do, and after time got to the point where she was fed up with him, blocked him on everything and I just banned him from the voice server.

We started talking more and more, got to the point where I asked her "If I were to ask you out on a date, would you go out with me?" She said yes.
We started going out and continued to have great fun together. Talking, Flirting constantly, playing games together.

After 10 months I really don't know what the hell has changed if anything. I'm still doing the samething that I did and she doing what she does but not really gaming much anymore. yes, I realize that we met over a game but can the lack of gaming together have that much effect? I dont think so, I hope not.

I love you so much Kelly that I'd die without you, I need you. I want to be able to wrap my arms around you and hold you for Eternity. I miss you even now and your just offline at the time being. Im sorry for being a complete ass and almost making the single biggest mistake of my life the other day, please forgive me. I need you by my side. I'll never leave you, I need you too much.

I love you Honey

( I doubt that anybody except you will find my profile, but incase anybody else does. Keep your comments to yourselves on this entry, I dont want to hear anybody else except her )

]]> ~VileShock