deviantART: by:WastelanderParadise

deviantART: by:WastelanderParadise http://search.deviantart.com/?q=by:WastelanderParadise&section=today deviantART RSS for by:WastelanderParadise en-us Copyright 2009, deviantART.com Thu, 31 Dec 2009 22:41:08 PST deviantART.com http://blogs.law.harvard.edu/tech/rss http://s.deviantart.com/minish/widgets/apple-touch-icon-precomposed.png Friends http://WastelanderParadise.deviantart.com/journal/27998360/ http://WastelanderParadise.deviantart.com/journal/27998360/ Tue, 27 Oct 2009 16:23:50 PDT

Are you their best friend?
Yes, but I don't know if they consider me a friend sometimes.

Who have you known the longest?

When did you meet them and where?
I met him in a yahoo chatroom when I was thirteen.

Why are they your best friends?

never fails to make me laugh. She's my baby. I owe her my life on more than one occasion.

is just a little angel. I don't know what drew me to her, but I know I'm not leaving any time soon.

is just a fuckin awesome dude. Even with his slight mood swings, I still enjoy his company!

is so patient with me. I should shoot myself for not having a job so I can pay her back. I haven't forgotten Silvie! I promise!

is... Well, he's just him!

Now name 10 friends including your best friends.

Who is the:

Oldest?

In Years Known

http://WastelanderParadise.deviantart.com/journal/26244362/ Tue, 28 Jul 2009 22:52:40 PDT

Current Status

For once in a very long time, I'm totally happy. I have relocated from the hell hole called MS to MO with people who actually give a shit about me. I have a awesome grandfather named J.C, a fantastic grandmother named Michele, a great cousin named Alex and of course, my mum and dad.

All of the stress and axiety that I felt, stuck in my blood grandmother's house was about to get the best of me. I really wanted to die when I was there, or kill to just get all of my axiety out. But then one day, mom decided it was time for us to up and leave. The only thing I regret is that I left my good friend Jason and my German friend Mike behind without saying goodbye. Buuuut, life happens and shit goes on, yes?

People In My Life

I am married to this great woman and I wouldn't have it any other way. We've had two dual sex children named Elton and Scat. I couldn't ask for a better pet. I love my puppy Raven. Although we were seperated or a while because we both just got on our feet, we have once again been brought back together and we realized how much we missed one another. Ahhh, it feels so good to be back with my little slave.

My long time friend and business partner. Bless the man! He has put up with so much of my shit through these last two years. It's embarrassing how stupid I've acted around him when I manage to keep my cool, business composition on here. Oh well. Everyone has that one person who brings the best out in them. He definitely does that.

Thiiiis....is still a work in progress. I really want to be their friend, but I don't know if they will accept my offer or not. I've sent the friend offer to Kelly and I'm axiously awaiting her answer. Also trying to do some business. But friends come first. Right? Right.

I admire them for their cosplays and ability to love each other without a single care in the world. I wish I was that open with my sexuality.

Mrs Burgan! I will always love this crazy girl. Forever AFI kooks. We don't talk much either, just say random passing by things most of the time. That's how life goes when you have a job and are trying to put your red thumbtack on the map of the life. Some friends are meant to stick together. Though we've had our few little SPATS here and there because we're both bitchy, we still love another.

My Grandfather J.C

I finally have a grandfather that gives a shit! OMG I'm so happy! I like to go to college with grandpa J because he's an aw... ]]> ~WastelanderParadise My List (I'm A Lazy Ass) http://WastelanderParadise.deviantart.com/journal/22634646/ http://WastelanderParadise.deviantart.com/journal/22634646/ Thu, 28 May 2009 10:57:26 PDT
I've been really busy designing a video game with my fiance, so I haven't done much in the way of art lately. Little doodles here and there, but nothing that I feel really comfortable with uploading. I am, however, putting some of these pictures in a local frame shop because I've improved some.

But, I don't know if I'll be posting them here or not. :/ If you want to see 'em, then tell me and I'll be happy to show you but, yeah. DOODLES!

I am going to get back on the requests, I promise. I am just so busy with life, work, designing games and writing that I can't keep my head on straight. -Dizzy- So yeah! How's all of you

Aragorn

Raikou

(Rough Sketch.)

Kira

Akira

(Pending)

(If I forgot to put you on the list, please let me know, okay?)

Previous Contest Prizes:
First Place Prizes For

Jak GMV

(Gathering Clips)
Story about said character & Bleeding Rose

(Finding Inspiration)

Second Place Prize For

Andras & Bleeding Rose

(Rough sketch)

Third Place For

Herz and Bleeding Rose

(Rough sketch.)

Commissions: (These Are Open)
[link]

Video Requests:
1. OPEN
2. OPEN
3. OPEN

Personal Things:
My 100 Souls Series:

(20 Of 100)
Xenosaga: Souls That Never Die

(2 of 12)

Trades:

She's Drawing Lady Havok and Davey for me.

]]> ~WastelanderParadise Contest: Nikates Bario http://WastelanderParadise.deviantart.com/journal/22480760/ http://WastelanderParadise.deviantart.com/journal/22480760/ Fri, 06 Feb 2009 01:05:37 PST
Since all of you seem to have forgotten about the last one, let me see if I can get you a little bit more motivated with this one. No I'm not dissing you, just saying.

Instructions:

Draw Nikates how you envision him to one of the songs from the list. WIDE variety, so feel free to think on it.

Keep him in the "business man" style. He's usually dressed in suits.

No animal entries this time, sorry guys. He has to be anime styled.

Make sure your entry is fun! Be sure to get as much of him in the picture as you can.

Rules:

Deadline is April 1st

No violence at all.

Let me know which song you're using okie?

Take your time. Don't rush your entry.

THE MUSIC:

AFI:
God Called In Sick Today
Days Of the Phoenix
Paper Airplanes (Makeshift Wings)
The Killing Lights

Billy Idol:
Hot In the City
Flesh For Fantasy
Cradle Of Love

Breaking Benjamin:
Breath
Diary Of Jane
So Cold

Coldplay:
Clocks
Speed Of Sound
Viva La Vida

Daft Punk:
One More Time
Digital Love
Harder, Better, Faster, Stronger

Disturbed:
Stupify
Striken
Inside the Fire

Evanescence:
Away From Me
Imaginary
Whisper

Fall Out Boys:
Dance, Dance
Sugar We're Going Down
Thanks For the Memories

Godsmack:
Whatever
I Stand Alone
Running Blind

Hunter Revenge:
24 Hour Party Zone
Why Can't U Understand?
Mysterious

Imogen Heap:
The Walk

Journey:
Any Way You Want It
Don't Stop Believing
Ask the Lonely

The Killers:
All These Things That I've Done
Mr. Brightside
Somebody Told Me

Nikates Bio:

Age: 25
Home Town: Santa Ana, California
Profession: Electronic Music Artist
Degree: Masters Degree In Psychology
Nicknames: Niki, Spikes, Solo

Nikates lost his parents at the age of nine in a car accident and was adopted a year later by the Bario family. He grew up interested in computers and finally got old enough to start mixing his own music and repairing them to earn some money. At the age of 19, he left his adopted mother and father and ran off to college. He gained his master's degree in Psychology and moved to Los Angles where he opened his night club "The Night-and-Gale". It was a big success for him and also the place where he met his boyfriend. Little is it known to most that by the new moon he turns into a vampire.

Nikates is out going and loves to interact with people without being the center of attention. He sticks around his club when it opens to watch everyone have a good time. His tragic past often leads him to having mental break downs when he's alone and being a heavy drinker. Somewhere along the line, he will come out of it.

Good Luck!

]]> ~WastelanderParadise God Called In Sick Today http://WastelanderParadise.deviantart.com/journal/22480726/ http://WastelanderParadise.deviantart.com/journal/22480726/ Fri, 09 Jan 2009 01:13:13 PST
Prices vary, depending on what that person wants done, but I won't charge outrageous amounts of money, because unlike some, it's mostly for the idea of trying something new.

The money that I do make, however, will be put into my banking account to save up so my family can get a car and get the fuck out of my mom's college friend's house. Information & commission types below.

Commission Types

Wolf Portrait
[link]

Wolf Character (OC, Self or Another Person)
[link] [link]

Tattoo Designs
[link]

Charcoal Portrait (Self Or Another)
[link] [link]

Semi-Realism (Self Or Another)
[link] [link]

Fanart (With Or Without OC)
[link] [link]

Things I Won't Do
Deadlines
Gore
Full-Body Nudity

Notes
If you wish to have a portrait done of yourself or a movie actor, music artist, etc: PLEASE SEND ME THE PIC TO BASE IT ON!

If you want coloring, we will have to discuss so. Because it will cost only a small bit extra.

Slot One: OPEN
Slot Two: OPEN
Slot Three: OPEN
Slot Four: OPEN

]]> ~WastelanderParadise Contest: Bleeding Love http://WastelanderParadise.deviantart.com/journal/22319809/ http://WastelanderParadise.deviantart.com/journal/22319809/ Mon, 12 Jan 2009 01:22:17 PST
The meaning behind the contest is to capture moments in my future that may never come. Each entry will be looked over as if it did happen. Keep in mind that this contest isn't just one of those that I'm holding because I want to. It has a deep meaning to me.

Note that these will all be my birthday presents from you.

Flamers, shut ya faces. This is a contest for my FRIENDS. So go away. Any one who makes rude comments WILL BE BLOCKED. Have A Great Day.

Instructions:

Draw myself with one of the men from the list below.

It has to be your own style. Don't copy someone else!

Your entry must be musically inspired, so pick a song and make sure it's your entry's title.

Backgrounds are okay, but keep it simple like before.

Animal entries are allowed, human is preferred.

Every emotion is allowed. Stress, pain, love, happiness. It's all welcome.

Rules:

The deadline is March 7th.

Comment ant tell me which man it is you will be drawing. The male cannot be copied twice. I will put his name next to your icon.

Minor violence is allowed (Meaning slight blood)

Your entry must have a story behind it. It does not have to be long, but the picture needs to be captioned as if it was an actual event in my life.

The Angels:

Bill Kaulitz:
[link] [link] [link] (Used By ~nashidesei)

Tom Kaulitz:
[link] [link] [link] (Used By ~nashidesei)

James "The Rev" Sullivan:
[link] [link] [link]

Brian "Synyster Gates" Haner Jr:
~WastelanderParadise Judging Over! Winner Announcement!! http://WastelanderParadise.deviantart.com/journal/21972877/ http://WastelanderParadise.deviantart.com/journal/21972877/ Wed, 17 Dec 2008 00:53:38 PST
To the others who didn't win: I still LOVE your drawings. And they will have a place in my gallery forever, as well as my hear.

First Place: GRAND WINNER! I chose her entry as first place because I believe that the over all emotion in the picture capturing ME since I am Bleeding Rose. The expression and the pose were perfect and I really love it. Thank you so much Neko! Send me a note with your video, picture request and the name of the character I am going to write in with her.

Second Place: RUNNER UP I chose her second entry to be second place because the colors awe struck me, as well as the emotion in the wolf's face's as she walks away. From what? I imagined it to be an AFI concert. Thank you for entering Sarah! Now, which of your characters shall I draw her with?

Third Place: FINAL PLACE I chose her entry for third place because the fell of the picture reminds me of how I feel when I listen to AFI's side project: Blaqk Audio. I really like this picture and I'm so glad that she entered. Now Nashi, send me a note telling me what you would like me to draw for chu.

Thank you ALL again! I will see you March 7th.

All my love,
~Paradise

]]> ~WastelanderParadise I'm Leaving My Account Open, Okay? http://WastelanderParadise.deviantart.com/journal/21325451/ http://WastelanderParadise.deviantart.com/journal/21325451/ Tue, 04 Nov 2008 22:32:33 PST
I am very sad that I am having to put my art on hold. But my manuscript is far more important at this point. Although I will leave this account open to the public, it doesn't mean I will post picture very often. And when I do, it probably won't be much.

To Brian:
I think you really do mean well. I appreciate the things you said even though that first comment was a bit harsh and untrue. But you understand now, and your encouragement really helps. Thanks a lot for that.

To MissNekoChan:
All those things you said to me, they really did help. And there wasn't a single time when I didn't take every word you said to heart. You're my friend, and I always do that with my friends. I'm glad you want me to stay around, I hope you're doing okay and that this mess didn't freak you out too much.

To My Davey:
I think that even through all the shit we argued about, this was probably your most productive.

Just kidding. Your art always inspired me, I'm sorry that I never said that until now. Especially your horses. There's where I learned to draw mine from. I'm sorry if I made you mad at me. You know I can be a bitch sometimes. That's why I'm your Jade.

To Nashi:
I'm not quite sure if you're encouraging, or trying to tell me to get over it. But either way, I owe you a a huge thanks. Your art has inspired me as well (Jak characters aren't easy to draw) and I thank you for at least saying something on this matter. It really means a lot to me.

To Kaida:
I don't think I remember where you came from, or if you are just passing through. But thanks for your words. And yes, shadding IS A PAIN IN THE ASS. But I will keep trying until I understand it comepletely. -Nods- Thank you for your opinion on the matter and it really does mean a lot to me.

I will try to do better in the future everyone. I really will. I owe all of you an apology. And I hope this clears up the subject a bit more. Sorry for not being clear before. I was just too upset to think so I put it as simple as possible.

]]> ~WastelanderParadise Adam and Grant http://WastelanderParadise.deviantart.com/journal/21292644/ http://WastelanderParadise.deviantart.com/journal/21292644/ Sun, 02 Nov 2008 23:25:54 PST
1. Pick a character, pairing, or fandom you like.
2. Turn on your music player and put it on random/shuffle.
3. Write a drabble related to each song that plays. You only have the time frame of the song to finish the drabble; you start when the song starts, and stop when it's over. No lingering afterwards!
4. Do ten of these, then post them~.

Pairing: Adam Carson and Grant Wilson

First: He's Not One Of Us from The Lion King II
Adam walked into the building only to find all of the lights were turned off. "Grant?" he called out as he looked around. Flick The lights came on and Adam was startled when he found all of the other TAPS members standing around. Grant was being held back by Steve and Dustin. Everyone looked extremely pissed off and like they could attack any second. "You do not belong here!" Jason yelled at the man. Adam backed up and looked at the others as they walked towards him. "NO!" Grant screamed as he cried. But Adam had run out by that time. "I'm so sorry Grant.. I'm so sorry...I really do love you," he muttered.

Second: Almost Easy by Avenged Sevenfold
Adam stood in the bedroom, waiting. He knew the boy would be back and that it was only a matter of time. Just then, the door opened and Adam's attentioned to it. Grant stepped in with his head bowed and his bangs hiding his eyes. "You're late," Adam said sourly. Grant tensed as he bit his lip. The drummer walked over to the paranormal hunter and grabbed his chin, lifting his head. Grant was terrified of the look in his eyes. He knew he had made Adam mad, but he had no idea it was that bad. SMACK Grant felt his own head jerk to the side as his cheek stung. His eyes widened before he looked at Adam again. Blood ran down his lip which made the drummer smirk. He showed his fangs to his pet before leaning down, licking the blood off his lip. "You've been a bad boy, Grant. I'll have to punish you for that," he whispered. "Oh Adam. Please do," Grant said. And the lights were off.

Third: Bleeding Love by Leona Lewis
Grant sat in the corner of his bedroom, hugging his knees and crying. Jason, Dave and all of the others had made him so miserable that day. They all told him things that he didn't want to believe. He's a rock star, he'll leave eventually. You'll be wishing you listened to us when he's gone, Grant. But Grant didn't believe them. Adam wouldn't do that. Just then, the very center of his thoughts walked into the room and looked at him in worry. "Grant?" Adam whispered as he walked over. Grant looked at him as he kneeled in front of him. He stared at the drummer for a minute before tears began to run down his face and he threw himself into Adam's arms, which shocked the drummer. "Please don't leave, Adam. I need you," the man whispered. Adam's eyes softened as he embraced the man, kissing his neck. He made him lay back on the floor and looked down, kneeling over him. "I'm not going anywhere Grant. I need you too." "Jason and the others said you would leave." Adam stared at him before leaning down, kissing him deeply before whispering in his ear, "Don't let them fill you with doubt. I'm not going anywhere. I love you Grant." Grant kissed Adam back before whispering, "I love you too, Adam. So very much." And the two smiled at one another.

Three: Imaginary by Evanescence
It had been a long harsh winter alone. Adam walked down the streets of New York alone, wishing that it had been him instead of his lover. Since that night, the nightmares had been so bad. Flashback: Adam found himself walking in a field of lilies before they turned into doves and flew passed him. He watched them fly into the complete blackness around him before they turned into blood and stained his mind. He looked down only to find that the ground came out from under him. Screaming, he finally managed to hit ground. He eased himself up and looked to find his lover standing in front of him, crying. As he tried to reach for him, he pulled away and vanished. Adam couldn't take it any more. He ran, but when he did, he ran right into the middle of the road. The honking of a horn echoed in his ears before he looked up and saw a bus heading right for him. Before he could move, he saw his whole life go back and then, blackness. But it was welcoming this time and he saw a figure waiting for him. Grant smiled and offered his hand. "Welcome home, baby." Adam smiled and took his hand, walking through the field with him. "Thank you, angel." And the two stopped, briefly to kiss. A reunion of lovers.

Four: Heart Of the Matter by Don Henley
Adam slammed the phone down on Donna and bit his lip as tears ran down his face. He knew that Grant would move on, he knew it as soon as they started dating. He had always loved Jason, and he never really could change that. He wiped his fa... ]]> ~WastelanderParadise The Scars We See http://WastelanderParadise.deviantart.com/journal/20938951/ http://WastelanderParadise.deviantart.com/journal/20938951/ Sat, 11 Oct 2008 14:55:51 PDT
Seth twirled the end of his braid around his finger, looking down at his feet. He didn't want to mak Adam uncomfortable, not as much as he was now. The secret that he had been hiding since he was able to meet the man was beginning to blend with the tension that was weighing down around him as the lean drummer stared at him intensely. Under those blue eyes, Seth always felt small and vulnerable, but that was one of the many reasons why he was hiding this secret now.

"Come on, Seth. What are you worried about?" Adam questioned again finally.

The boy's visible eye began to fill with tears. Adam looked shocked as he saw the first tear fall. How can I tell you when I can't even tell myself that I really am gay? Finally, he moved his braid over his shoulder and just let it out.

"I love you Adam Carson."

Adam stared for a moment, everything slowly registering in his mind about what was going on. All of the pain that he and Seth had gone through, revealing their scars to each other, making new cuts on their flesh together, it all finally sank in. Seth stared at the man, his eyeliner making black marks with the red shadow that was under his eye down his cheeks. He was about to run out of the studio room but a caloused hand grabbed his wrist just as he was about to take off.

He turned around and looked to see Adam smiling calmly at him. He moved closer, moving his hand from Seth's wrist to his hand and laced their fingers. Seth blinked slowly before he felt Adam's thumb wipping his tears away. He leaned to the touch before that thumb moved to carefully run over the boy's lips.

"Why did you wait so long?" Adam questioned through a whisper.

"I'm sorry Adam. I had such a hard time convincing myself that I was gay... And then, when we became so close, I had a hard time telling you."

"I love you, too Seth."

And then, the drummer leaned down, sealing his lips with the boy's in a kiss fit for a lover.

]]> ~WastelanderParadise 100 Things To Confess http://WastelanderParadise.deviantart.com/journal/18669383/ http://WastelanderParadise.deviantart.com/journal/18669383/ Wed, 04 Jun 2008 20:04:51 PDT My arms.

2. What color is your favorite hoodie?
Black with silver letters.

3. Would you kiss the last person you kissed again?
Yes. In the beat of my heart.

4. Do you plan outfits?
Not usually.

5. How are you feeling RIGHT now?
Weak and tired.

7. Who was the last person you kissed?
Mike.

8. Person before that?
Uhm.

9. (is mysteriously missing)
JANET!!!

10. What are you craving right now?
Pizza

11. What comes to mind when I say cabbage?
Rabbits

12. Do you make prank calls?
Crack calls. I don't like them

13. Ever hooked up with some one out of state?
Yes. And that never works.

14. Do you sleep with any stuff animals?
I sleep with an action figure of Axel. x3

15. Would you dance to the taco song?
HAYL NO

16. Have you ever counted to 1,000?
No

17. Do you bite into your ice cream or just lick it?
Both

18. Do you like anyone right now?
I do. He means a lot to me.

19. What do you think of crickets?
They make a cute sound, but it gets old real quick

20. Have you ever met a celebrity?
Yes! I met a Christian band called The Afters

21. Do you like cottage cheese?
Only had it once

22. What are you listening to right now?
Beautiful Disaster - 311

25. Would you go sky diving?
No.

27. Would you throw potatoes at him?
I know a couple of men I'd like to throw something other than potatoes at.

28. Is there anything sparkly on you?
No.

30. Do you rent movies often?
No

31. Who sits behind you in your math class?
No one. I'm homeschooled.

34. Can you count backwards from 74?
Not sure. Never tried.

35. Who are you going to be with tonight??
By myself for now.

36. Brown or white egg?
Brown. They're better

38. Ever been on a train?
No, but I want to be

39. Ever told someone you loved them?
Yes.

40. Do you have a cell phone?
Yes.

41. Are you a virgin?
Not so much anymore.

42. Any kids?
Someday.

43. What is your best friend doing tomorrow?
That's an excellent question. I have not a clue.

44. Ever had cream puffs?
Yes. Very good, but almost too sweet.

45. Ever had Breaded Shrimp?
Yes. DELICIOUS

46. Have you ever seen The Butterfly Effect?
No.

47. What was the last question you asked?
"Why do you drink yourself stupid?"

48. What was the last CD you bought?
Sing the Sorrow - AFI (For the SECOND time)

49. What is/was your bus number for school?
I never rode the bus.

51. Is your hair curly?
Anything but.

52. Last time you cried?
Uhm. June 10th

53. Ever walked into a wall?
YES. I'm very good at that. It's one of my useless talents <3

54. Ever walked UP a wall?
Attempted to

55. Have you ever bought anything from PacSun?
No. But I need to check that out.

56. Favorite time of the year?
Winter

57. Favorite number?
31, 32, 34, 45, 53, VIII, IV, XIII

58. Favorite colors?
Glacier blue, gold, pink, black and red.

59. Do you have any piercing?
Left ear.

60. Do you have any tattoos?
Not yet. Working on the first one's design.

61. Who was the last person you held hands with?
Reece.

62. Do you sleep with the TV on?
No.

63. Where did you get your avatar from?
Icoator.

64. Why'd you pick it?
Because Demyx owns the rest of Organization XIII

65. Do you like your life right now?
Yes finally!

66. How do you feel about 'love'?
Love. It's a strong word, but these days it doesn't mean much to the one who we are supposed to be involved with. However, to me there is a man in my life which I am willing to give a second chance at love for. He came into my life just when I was so close to giving up on the feeling. We've found comfort in each other and we're slowly bringing each other back to life.

67. What is your favorite animal?
Wolves, big cats, horses

69. Do you have good vision?
No

70. Can you hula hoop?
Yes.

71. Could you ever forgive a cheater?
In a relationship, no. I've seen that too much with my mom.

72. Do you have a job?
No -.-

74. What are you wearing?
Red boy short pajamas and my Yu-gi-oh shirt

75. What does your hair look like?
Flat in style, deep brown/black.

76. Ever climbed out a window?
No. But... ]]> ~WastelanderParadise Tagged http://WastelanderParadise.deviantart.com/journal/18414960/ http://WastelanderParadise.deviantart.com/journal/18414960/ Tue, 20 May 2008 12:52:20 PDT

Tagged.

The rules are:

1. Post these rules.
2. Each person tagged must post 8 random facts about themselves
3. Tags should write a journal/ blog of these facts
4. At the end of the post 8 more persons are tagged and named
5. Go to their page and leave a comment telling them they're tagged

8 Facts about me:
1- I love to make slash music videos.
2- I am bisexual
3- I jam out to Billy Idol every night before I go to bed
4- I'd rather die than see my friends suffer
5- I hate AOL with a passion
6- I wear a collar almost every day
7- I am in love with Adam Carson
8- Davey Havok is my idol

TAGS:

(Back to you Jan)

]]> ~WastelanderParadise Stolen From Sarah: Pt 2 http://WastelanderParadise.deviantart.com/journal/18391248/ http://WastelanderParadise.deviantart.com/journal/18391248/ Sun, 18 May 2008 22:32:14 PDT 1.) Lay in the dark with Adam Carson
2.) Get my full back tattoo of AFI
3.) Meet Billy Idol and shake his hand

Three Names You Go By:
1.) Baby Girl - Mom
2.) Mrs. Carson - Mrs. Burgan/Sarah
3.) Nightmare - Raven/Janet

Three Screen Names You Have Had:
1.) shunrei_hiro
2.) kuramasgirl
3.) aioriasdaughter

Three Physical Things You Like About Yourself:
1.) My hands
2.) My hair
3.) My feet

Three Parts Of Your Heritage:
1.) Cajun
2.) French (Apparently..)
3.) And just plain ol' southern blood

Three Things That Scare You:
1.) Losing Sarah
2.) Never meeting Adam
3.) 3-4 in the morning

Three Of Your Everyday Essentials:
1.) Music
2.) Water or green tea
3.) Notebook

Three Things You Are Wearing Right Now:

1.) My collar that has cupcakes on it (Because I belong to Adam)
2.) My airbrushed Jak shirt
3.) My AFI ring on my left hand and my 14k gold ring with two Amethyst stones in it on my right hand (Adam's birthstone)

Three Of Your Favorite Bands/Musical Artists:

1.) AFI
2.) Billy Idol
3.) Ben's Brother

Three Of Your Favorite Songs: (At the moment?)

1.) Strange Relationship - Darren Hayes
2.) The Missing Frame - AFI
3.) Cradle Of Love - Billy Idol

Three Things You Want In A Relationship:

1.) Someone who's open-minded. I like being able to share who I am without censoring my thoughts and feeling to suit my counterpart.

2.) For him to understand me. I have been left by so many people because they can't understand that I'm not the same from one day to the next. I have sevear depression and because of it, I often get left in the shadows. It would be nice to have a man who understands me and comforts me instead of rolling his eyes and telling me to get over it.

3.) I would like to see that he has a sense of humor and it's always stuck in a bad mood or always serious about something. I would like to be able to tickle him and actually have him laugh and try to get away over him telling me to leave him alone. It's improtant to me because all my other lovers back been pricks.

Two Truths And A Lie (in no particular order):

1.) I can't stand goths
2.) I love Adam Carson
3.) Barbie-girls piss me off.
(Take a guess at which is the lie.)

Three Physical Things About The Preferred Sex That Appeal To You:

1.) Bright eyes
2.) Toned body and taller than me
3.) A pure heart. Nothing matters if they person isn't kind

Three Of Your Favorite Hobbies:

1.) Writting
2.) Drawing
3.) Dancing

Three Things You Want To Do Really Badly Right Now:

1.) Have releif from this DAMN BACK ACHE
2.) Lay down on my new air mattress with Adam and listen to love songs. (Because I'm just that hopeless)
3.) Finish writting my book about Billy Idol

Three Careers You're Considering/You've Considered:

1.) Artist
2.) Musician (Workin on that)
3.) Publishing Author (That's already working out)

Three Places You Want To Go On Vacation:

1.) London.
2.) Ireland.
3.) Berkeley.

Three Names You Like:

1.) Adam
2.) Tina.
3.) Sarah

Three Ways That You Are Stereotypically A Girl:

1.) I have a thing about wearing bright colored make up
2.) I have a passion for purses <3
3.) I LOVE jewerly

Three Ways That You Are Stereotypically A Boy:

1. I perfer to not wear my clothes skin tight.
2. I would rather spend my night jamming to AFI, Def Leppard or Billy Idol than Madonna, Hillary Duff or -shudder- Britney Spears
3. I like to skateboard

]]> ~WastelanderParadise Stolen from Sarah >:3 http://WastelanderParadise.deviantart.com/journal/18376071/ http://WastelanderParadise.deviantart.com/journal/18376071/ Sun, 18 May 2008 02:14:00 PDT Open. Not that I have much of a choice, considering they're off track. I didn't break 'em! No not me! >>

2. Do you take the shampoos and conditioner bottles from hotel?
Lol. No, but my dad used to and give them to me.

3. Have you ever 'done it' in a hotel room?
Can you say 'virgin'?

4. Have you ever stolen a street sign before?
No. But I picked one up after Katrina blew our shit away in 2003

5. Do you like to use post-it notes?
I would if I had them. I constantly need reminding of something. -Will invest in some of those soon-

6. Do you cut out coupons but then never use them?
No. That kind of stuff goes straight in the file ben. Under S for Sh--.

7. Would you rather be attacked by a big bear or a swarm of a bees?
Neither. Bug spray and a shot gun

8. Do you have freckles?
Hmm. No. Not that I'm aware of.

9. Do you always smile for pictures?
I usually flip the camera off.

10. What's your biggest pet-peeve?
Hmm. Catch me later on that one.

11. Do you sleep with your sheets tucked in or out?
Hard to tuck them in when you only have an air bed. >.<

12. Do you ever count your steps when you walk?
Nope

13. Have you ever peed in the woods?
WTF kinda question is that?! Come on people, sheesh.

14. Do you ever dance even if there's no music playing?
Yes, because Billy Idol's "Dancing With Myself" is usually always playing on repeat. Or Blaqk Audio's "Again, Again and Again."

15. Do you chew your pens and pencils?
I used to. That's why I went to mechanical.

16. How many people have you slept with this week?
I repeat 'virgin'. And are we talking sex or just sleeping? Because I've done neither since, like, Feburary.

17. What size is your bed?
Queen

18. What is your "Song of the week"?
The Missing Frame by AFI

19. Is it okay for guys to wear pink?
Of course. But Jade Puget makes it hot.

20. Do you still watch cartoons?
Just Scooby Doo. Although I read Garfield comics every day.

21. Whats your least favorite movie?
Least favorite? Where would like me to begin?

22. Where would you bury hidden treasure if you had some?
*Bury? What are we, bloody pirates? ÂAhoy Matey, we buried it three paces North!Â ÂThree of your paces or three of mine?Â* ~ Posted by

Agreed Sarah. Why don't we just bring Adam in while we're at it, hmm?

23. What do you drink with dinner?
Dinner for me usually is just green tea and a golden apple. Go Vegetarian. -Inspired by Adam Carson-

24. What do you dip a chicken nugget in?
Answer above.

25. What is your favorite food/ cuisine?.
Hmm. Probably sushi. If I ain't got that, then just apples.

26. What movies could you watch over and over and still love?
Black Beauty, Harry Potter 3, A Goofy Movie and POTC: Curse Of the Black Pearl

27. Last person you kissed/kissed you?
God oh mighty. If you mean on the lips, that was ages ago. Don't care to share. If you mean on the cheek, then my mother when I said goodnight to her.

28. Were you ever a boy/girl scout?
-Insert AFI comment here about this subject-
Adam: I was a Weeblo once.
Jade: Dude we all blow.
Davey: I blow.
Jade: Davey's quite the 'demon in the sack' so to speak.

*And no, I've never been.*

29. Would you ever strip or pose nude in a magazine?
I have more self respect than that.

30. When was the last time you wrote a letter to someone on paper?
-Tries to remember-

31. Can you change the oil on a car?
Yep.

32. Ever gotten a speeding ticket?
No. I don't drive

33. Ran out of gas?
Yep, but not while I was behind the wheele.

34. Favorite kind of sandwich?
Hmm. I have these portobella mushroom patties. MMM. Soo good with cheese. <3

35. Best thing to eat for breakfast?
Strawberries & Creme oatmeal

36. What is your usual bedtime?
4-5 AM

37. Are you lazy?
Physically, yes. Mentally, don't I wish

38. When you were a kid, what did you dress up as for halloween?
Nala, a genie, a southern belle and a oriental dancer.

39. What is your Chinese astrological sign?
Sheep. Which is odd, because I'm usually always cold.

40. How many languages can you sp... ]]> ~WastelanderParadise Venting. EXTREME FRUSTRATION http://WastelanderParadise.deviantart.com/journal/18298330/ http://WastelanderParadise.deviantart.com/journal/18298330/ Mon, 12 May 2008 23:48:15 PDT [link]

My cousin James Glass was murdered that night. That BASTARD took my brother away from me. James was like a part of me because I grew up with him for seven years. This memory will haunt me forever now. I heard the ambulance go by at 4.32a.m that morning but I had no idea it would be going to pick up his body. R.I.P Brother... I'll really miss you.

But now this is where the frustration comes in...

It's only been a week since my brother's death, right? Everyone keeps asking if my mother and I are okay. WTF?! NO WE'RE NOT OKAY! We couldn't make his wake OR his funeral because my grandfather was a prick about giving us gas money. How does someone expect you to lose something that was almost a part of yourself and be okay about it in just one week? I'll never understand that. It's like asking you to basicly pull yourself out of your grave when you're dead.

So then today my cousin Janice calls and asks me for money. MONEY! After my brother just died! No I don't have any money! If she wants to cut the phone off, then she can be my guest. She can burn it too for all I care at this point. I can't believe she had the NERVE to do that after all that we've been through this week. UGH!!!

Now Kyle (My current house mate and ex fiancee) starts in with this shit about how he wants me to be nicer to him and everything. A snowball's chance in hell that'll happen. Know why? Because he's never nice to me. All he does is disrespect my family and me. One minute he's fine and the next he's in a pissy or a moping mood and I'm SO TIRED OF IT. He's been trying to skip work for quite a while now and he knows we need the money to pay the cable bill and stuff like that. I don't know what is going through his head but he better get it out of his ass and see that he's in the real world.

I'm ALMOST disgusted with Adam Carson. That man has YET to get to the post office and pick up the package I sent him for his birthday. But at the same time, I can understand why he hasn't gone because they're still recording on their new EP but still. It's not very polite of a rockstar to leave his fans hanging. I'm not going to sit here and be mad at him, I love him too much for that. But if he was just another person, I'd be extremely pissed.

As bad as this sounds, I'm also very disgusted with myself. Because I can't find release in anything any more. Not AFI. Not Adam. Not my art.. Not even my music. I've sort of sunk so far into my depression and anger that I question myself. Please don't freak out. Suicide has come to my mind again more than twice this week, but I always find a reason to talk myself out of it. I can't seem to get out of this rut that I've slumped into.

]]> ~WastelanderParadise AFI, Sara and My Billy Idol Obsession http://WastelanderParadise.deviantart.com/journal/17010142/ http://WastelanderParadise.deviantart.com/journal/17010142/ Fri, 22 Feb 2008 14:04:25 PST
It's been a couple of weeks since I got Adam's birthday ring and I have YET to send it out. Go figure. Sara,

gave me the P.O Box number that Lori was supposed to give me who never not back to me on the matter.

I have various gifts built up in a corner that I need to send to them (none of which are big enough to take up much room) but have yet to get the time for it. I wrote all of them a letter, hopefully it doesn't take them hours to read. Jade's was the shorest at a total of four pages.

Sarah and I are also trying to think up a way to meet in California (somewhere near Berkeley) and hunt down Davey. It's a fangirl thing. If you're not this obsessed with meeting AFI then you're not much of a fan in my opinion. It's also my way of meeting one of my friends.

As some might have noticed, my current obsession is Billy Idol. And why not? He's sweet, charming, good looking and he rocks the fuckin house! So some of you are probably wondering where this suddenly came from. Allow me to explain why just it is that he is showing up on my page so much.

Back when I was 13, I came across one of my father's old 80s rock CDs and only found one interesting song on it. White Wedding by Billy Idol. Last track on the CD was the best. I didn't appreciate it back then because I was too caught up in being a teenager and shit. I am older now and can appreciate older much and Billy Idol was one of the best.

So there ya go, that's why I'm suddenly obsessed. He's a memory from my past. One of the better ones and it makes me happy.

]]> ~WastelanderParadise This Is For You. My World. http://WastelanderParadise.deviantart.com/journal/16381592/ http://WastelanderParadise.deviantart.com/journal/16381592/ Sun, 13 Jan 2008 02:40:48 PST

Up next is my angel, Kyle. It's not been long since we met, maybe three or four months but it feels like an eternity. And I realize that every time we're together, you say "I'll always love you" that you mean that from the bottom of your heart. You take everything I say straight to heart and I always have so much fun with you. You teach me new things every day and I love learning. I will spend the rest of my life with you because I know that you accept my habits and random talking like this. I feel when you're with me even though we haven't met in person yet that I have wings strong enough to hold me up above all my problems. I believe in myself when you tell me that I can do anything, and I know that some day we'll make all of our dreams come true together. I love you so much baby.

This is for Kim. You are my one and only sister. I still remember the night that we met way back when. How shy you were, trying your best to hide behind your dad's leg. But that didn't work well, did it? It didn't take us long to warm up to each other and now, we have grown up. Times and things aren't as simple as they were back then. Kid shows have been replaced by movies of all kinds, Alan Jackson and Pokemon themes turned into My Chemical Romance and Harry Potter music. Story books that we'd read together have turned into massive piles of homework books. Barbies turned into action figures, cartoon posters turned into band posters. But somehow we still kept the video games and some of our happiness. Love you little one, never forget that I am always here for you and I'll never leave.

To Davey Havok, though you'll never see this. You're the most beautiful human being on the face of the earth. Even though you hide behind your make up, it only brings out how beautiful you are. I don't know if you know this or not, but you are the closest human to being perfect. There will never be another like you. You're so complex and make me confused more each time I try to figure out your lyrics. But you and your band saved me. I'd be dead right now if it wasn't for you. I owe you my life and I hope that some day I can meet you. I love you Davey. You're so dear to me.

To Hunter Burgan, another one who will never read this. You are the most amazing person I have ever seen. Rowdy but calm you put a great presense wherever you go. If I could sit down at a table in a cafe with you in California, I'd tell you everything that I think of you. Even though you try to hide it, you're a great man and your heart shows through the power in your music. I am a fan of your band Hunter Revenge for life. The unique tone in your voice and the passion in your notes has captured my heart forever. I hope that you can make something of your band and keep it up in your spare time away from AFI.

To Jade and Smith Puget. Even though you may never see this, I love the two of you as if we were seperated at birth. Smith, you've got to be the coolest guy on the face of this damned planet. You have an amazing personality and aren't afraid to show that no matter what people say about you. You are happy and creative, but at the same time have a suttle manner about it and don't do anything beyond rational. At least, not most of the time. But hey, that's what you hve one life for, right? Live it up, bro! Now to you Jade. You're a great brother, even though Smith may (and I know he does) get on your nerves sometime, you always take care of him. I know that if we could spend just a while together that I would get just as attached to you as Smith already is. I'd never do anything to make you feel uncomfortable and you don't have to put on your face for me. You are just a normal person like the rest of us but with an incredible music talent. Keep it up sweet heart.

To Adam Carson. You've got almost the same beautiful as Davey. I look at your eyes in a photo and I see how much you care about the people around you. I hope and believe that if we should meet one day that you can love and care for me like you do Davey, Jade, Smith and Hunter. They are like your family and I want to be a part of that. I look at the poster of you and the others on... ]]> ~WastelanderParadise Jak Video Series http://WastelanderParadise.deviantart.com/journal/15904652/ http://WastelanderParadise.deviantart.com/journal/15904652/ Wed, 12 Dec 2007 14:32:54 PST
Red, a beginner band came down to the coast with a few other bands and played a HELL OF A CONCERT for us. After hearing and seeing their preformance first hand, I knew instantly I had to know more about them.

So here we go: I'm making an 11 video series of Jak & Daxter videos to the RED album: End Of Silence. These videos will be posted on Youtube when they are done and I will keep everyone here updated by posting news about each video as I progress. I hope you view them when they do go up.

Part One: Jak's Silence (Post-Production)
Part Two: Breathe Into Jak (Complete)
Part Three: Let Him Go! (50% Complete)
Part Four: It's Over For Us (Pre-Production)
Part Five: He's Lost Now (Post-Production)
Part Six: Put the Pieces Together (Post-Production)
Part Seven: Brothers Break Down (Post-Production)
Part Eight: Wasted Chances With Jak (Post-Production)
Part Nine: Why, Keira Did You Give It Away? (Post Production)
Part Ten: So, He Ran (Post-Production)
Part Eleven: It's The End Now (Post-Production)

]]> ~WastelanderParadise