deviantART: by:bbelill

till next week <... ]]> ~bbelill Knock knock housekeeping http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/18898858/ http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/18898858/ Tue, 17 Jun 2008 18:34:25 PDT

Who here knows that when you stay the night at a hotel, youÂre supposed to tip the housekeeper? Okay. Now who out of the ones who knew that actually does so?

For those of you who do not know, I have taken up a part-time housekeeping job at a local hotel. When my fall semester starts back up I will only be working weekends (for those of you who are worried about my studies)

Now before I continue on with my Âjournal, let me list the details of what I do.

1) Strip bedding/pillow cases, and bed mats.(and put them into a dirty laundry bin)
2) Gather all used towels/hand towels/washcloths/and towel mats.(these also go in the dirt laundry bin)
3) Empty trashcans/clean them out/dry them/and put fresh bags in all.
4) Collect any and ALL garbage and dispose of it.(this does include disgusting things that I will not list)
5) Scrub tub/toilet/sink/mirror/ and floor (without a mop) in the bathroom.
6) Restock bathroom (two shampoos/and conditioners, 4 cups, facial soap, deodorant bar, 4 towels, 4 hand towels, 4 washcloths,1 bathmat, and 2 rolls of toilet paper) (plus I have to arrange the bathmat/deodorant bar, and 1 washcloth in a pretty arrangement on the tub, make sure the shower curtain is in the MIDDLE of the bathtub, and that the edge of the toilet paper roll is folded into a point) Now the bathroom is doneÂ but only if there is no water spots or streaks anywhere in the bathroom.
7) Dust/wipe down all furniture. (TV stand and TV, dressers, window sill, dining table, end table, lamps, mirror, coffee pot.)
8) Restock bedroom (two packets of coffee, creamer, sugar, coffee sticks, 4 cups, and TV guide.)
9) Get fresh sheet sets/pillow cases(enough for two pillows per bed) wool blanket, and comforter.
10) Remake beds. Fitted sheet, than second sheet, than wool blanket. Fold the top of the SECOND sheet 3 inches over the top of the wool blanket and tuck the sheet + wool blanket into the underside of the mattress(make sure that the corners of the mattress match and fold over neatly) Now take your comforter and drape on the bed but only enough to lightly brush the floor. The leftover comforter will fold neatly over the top of the pillows.
11) Now take the channel list and place the TV guide on the left side of the list and place the remote on the left side of the TV guide.
12) Make sure microwave and refrigerator are clean and open.
13) Vacuum the floor and hallway leading to the room.
14) Make sure all lights are turned off, windows closed, and window curtain opened halfway.
15) Take laundry bin and empty it.
16) Proceed to next room.
17) When all rooms are done, restock carts for the next day.

Plus please keep in mind that I am only allotted 25 min per room to finish them (otherwise I get chewed out)

Okay now to the point of that list. Housekeeping is not something to be ashamed about. It is hard, thankless and often disgusting, work. I am very sore at the end of every shift, and sometimes I feel a bit Âtraumatized. (party rooms are scary to clean up) Therefore I do not believe that my job is something that makes me lower than everyone else. I went to work today only to have someone actually sneer at me when they found out I was a lowly housekeeper. I was talking to a guest on my break about a recent book I had read when I looked at the time and said I had to get back to work. He looked at my uniform and mistook me for a nurse. I corrected him and he sneered and said that isnÂt work. And then walked off.

I do not know about you, but after he said that I felt very insulted. I will not go into detail about some of the rooms I have cleaned, but I will say that I know a lot of people who would have taken one look, say Âfuck thatÂ and walk out and quit. I, on the other hand, Look at the mess, roll up my sleeves and get to work. After all of my rooms are clean, I go home, take a look in the mirror(which never has good news) and proceed to the nearest shower and s... ]]> ~bbelill HOLY MOTH BALLS TOTO! http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/18582156/ http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/18582156/ Fri, 30 May 2008 18:46:12 PDT

Gallery

Journal

do you know what i just realised?? i have officially been on deviantart for over a year....a year and 4 days to be exact! this is so odd.. i mean i have other accounts that i have been on longer but don't do anything on them...(truth be told i usually lose interest after the first month or so) but i have actually stay involved on this account

Thank you guys so much for ...well for just being. i have so many friends here on da that i look forward to talking to everyday and i think that is what has kept me so active on this account.

thankyou for the support ...and a very special thankyou to the people who are just here for me...you know who you are

so go ahead and give yourselves a pat on the back!

i want to say a very special thankyou to

, seriously girl, if it wasn't for your support in the very beginning i would have left this site after the first week or so. but you told me to give it more time, and encouraged me to wait and see. thankyou for supporting me and my work

because of your kindness i stayed on here (even though others wanted me gone) and now because of that i am lucky to know some really awesome people and fellow artists. *cheesy grin*

oh...and i am working on making my OWN quiz

so when that one gets up i will be tagging some people

Wanted Dead or Alive

Its all the same, only the names will change
Everyday it seems were wasting away
Another place where the faces are so cold
Id drive all night just to get back home

Chorus:
Im a cowboy, on a steel horse I ride
Im wanted dead or alive
Wanted dead or alive

Sometimes I sleep, sometimes its not for days
And the people I meet always go their separate ways
Sometimes you tell the day
By the bottle that you drink
And times when youre all alone all you do is think

Chorus

I walk these streets, a loaded six string on my back
I play for keeps, cause I might not make it back
I been everywhere, still Im standing tall
Ive seen a million faces an Ive rocked them all

Im a cowboy, on a steel horse I ride
Im wanted dead or alive
Im a cowboy, I got the night on my side
Im wanted dead or alive
Wanted dead or alive

http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/18455190/ Thu, 22 May 2008 21:39:24 PDT

---INFORMATION---

-- Name: Brittni
-- Birthdate: few months from nows
-- Current Location: behind you
-- Eye Color: Brown
-- Hair Color: currently a reddish color
-- Righty or Lefty: righty
-- Zodiac Sign: that thing with scales
-- Innie or Outtie: Innie

---DESCRIBE---

-- Your heritage: mostly scottish
-- The shoes you wore today: my kick your ass boots
-- Your eyes: they help me see??? SortaÂ
-- Your weakness: sporksÂ*cough*

---WHAT IS---

-- Your most overused phrase on AIM: I donÂt have aim
-- Your thoughts first waking up: coffeeÂcoffeeÂneed coffeeÂ
-- The first feature you notice in the opposite sex: hands
-- Your best physical feature: my hair(wellÂI likes it)
-- Your bedtime: when I crash

---YOU PREFER---

-- Pepsi or Coke: coke
-- McDonald's or Burger King: I think they should join forces...behold MACKING(lol)
-- Single or group dates: I donÂt date
-- Adidas or Nike: I wouldnÂt be caught dead in either
-- Chocolate or Vanilla: TWIZZLERS
-- Cappuccino or coffee: yes please?
-- Bras or Panties: I wear both?

---DO YOU---

-- Smoke: currently no.
-- Cuss: daily
-- Take a shower everyday: most definitely, I likes to smell good
-- Have a crush(es): no
-- Who are they?: non-existent george
-- Do you think you've been in love? I donÂt think, I know
-- Want to go to college: I am in college
-- Like high school: I hated highschool
-- Want to get married: no
-- Type w/ your fingers on the right keys: yes?
-- Believe in yourself: who cares?
-- Get motion sickness: on boats(which is why I donÂt get on em)
-- Think you're attractive: do pigs fly?
-- Think you're a health freak: fark that, I like to eat what I want when I want
-- Like thunderstorms: most definitely
-- Play an instrument: yes

---IN THE PAST MONTH HAVE YOU---

-- Drank alcohol: nope(two months ago yes ^^)
-- Smoke(d): nope
-- Done a drug: nope
--Go to the mall: GOD NO, malls=evil
-- Eaten sushi: ewwie
-- Been on stage: yup
-- Made homemade cookies: HAHAHAHHAHAHAHA
-- Dyed your hair: actually noÂI need to though
-- Stolen anything: stealing is stupid

---HAVE YOU EVER---

-- Flown on a plane: many times
-- Missed school because it was raining?: nopes
-- Told a guy/girl that you liked them?: duh
-- Cried during a Movie?: in private yes, in front of people no
-- Had an imaginary friend: ya you!
-- Been on stage?: many times
-- Cut your hair: yups
-- Had crush on a teacher?: no
-- Played a game that required removal of clothing?: lol yups, in highschool, car game, first person to become naked had to jump into lake superiorÂI lost onceÂin the lovely month of marchÂOMG FUCKING COLD
-- Been trashed or extremely intoxicated: yes, which is why I gave it up
-- Been caught "doing something": nope, I sneaky
-- Been called a tease: nope
-- Gotten beaten up: lol many of times(I gave as good as I got though)
-- Been in a fight: see previous question
-- Shoplifted: when I was younger, yuh, not since I was 16 though

---THE FUTURE---

-- Are you hoping to be married: didnÂt we already go over this question?
-- How do you want to die?: fighting
-- What do you want to be when you grow up?: I donÂt want to grow up thankyou berry much
-- What country would you most like to visit?: I canÂt name just one

---OPPOSITE SEX---

-- Best eye/hair color: doesnÂt matter
-- Best height: hmm a little taller than me would be nice...but again doesnÂt really matter
-- Best weight: again doesnÂt matter
-- Best first date location: dates are over-rated, seriously all it succeeds in doing is making both people really nervous, I say fuck thatÂjust chill.
-- Best first kiss location: again doesnÂt matter

---NUMBER OF---

-- Number of people I could trust with my life: one-andi
-- Number of piercings: 7
-- Number of tattoos: 4, but 5 a... ]]> ~bbelill one more quiz-tomorrow new features http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/18439800/ http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/18439800/ Wed, 21 May 2008 23:01:28 PDT

phobia quiz

x = Somewhat
xx = Greater
xxx+ = huge enormous crippling omg fear

A
[xxx] Achluophobia - Fear of darkness. (actually I am very frightened by dark…

[x] Acrophobia - Fear of heights. (I wouldnÂt go skydiving..but heights donÂt bug me)
[ ] Agliophobia - Fear of pain.(LMAO nope)
[xx] Agoraphobia - Fear of open spaces or crowds.(big crowds of people

aranoid brittni)
[x]Aichmophobia - Fear of needles or pointed objects. (only when they want my blood, damn vamps)
[ ] Amaxophobia - Fear of riding in a car. ( wtf?)
[ ] Androphobia - Fear of men. (pfft, no man scares me)
[ ] Anginophobia - Fear of angina or choking.(I have never really thought about it)
[ ] Anthrophobia - Fear of flowers. (really?)
[ ] Anthropophobia - Fear of people or society.(didnÂt we kinda cover this one?)
[xx] Aphenphosmphobia - Fear of being touched. (I can handle itÂbut I have to really know /trust someone first)
[xx] Arachnophobia - Fear of spiders. (eweweeweweweewew creepy little bastards)
[ ] Arithmophobia - Fear of numbers. (seriously?)
[ ] Astraphobia - Fear of thunder and lightening.(nah dude I LOVES me a good storm)
[ ] Ataxophobia - Fear of disorder or untidiness.(pfft I wish, maybe I wouldnÂt lose shit all the time if I was)
[ ] Atelophobia - Fear of imperfection. (hahahaha again I wish)
[ ]Atychiphobia - Fear of failure. ( not afraidÂI just donÂt like it much)
[ ] Autophobia - Fear of being alone. (I am very comfortable on my own thankyou very much)

B
[ ] Bacteriophobia - Fear of bacteria.(not afraid but that doesnÂt mean I likes it)
[ ] Barophobia - Fear of gravity. (LOLLOLLOLLOL)
[ ] Bathmophobia - Fear of stairs or steep slopes. (not afraid anymoreÂkinda used to falling)
[ ] Batrachophobia - Fear of amphibians.
[ ] Bibliophobia - Fear of books. (only in the case of not having enough)
[ ] Botanophobia - Fear of plants. (nah dude)

C
[ ] Cacophobia - Fear of ugliness. (nope I am pretty much used to it)
[ ] Catagelophobia - Fear of being ridiculed publicly.(pfft try itÂI dares ya)
[ ] Catoptrophobia - Fear of mirrors. (LOL dread it is more like it, but not afraid)
[ ] Chionophobia - Fear of snow.(LMAO that would be silly considering where I live)
[ ] Chromophobia - Fear of colors.(I donÂt like many colors..but they donÂt scare me)
[ ] Chronomentrophobia - Fear of clocks.
[xx ] Claustrophobia - Fear of confined spaces.(I hates em)
[ ] Coulrophobia - Fear of clowns.(MMFWCL)
[ ] Cyberphobia - Fear of computers. (LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL)
[ ] Cynophobia - Fear of dogs.(PUPPIES)

D
[ ] Dendrophobia - Fear of trees.
[ ] Dentophobia - Fear of dentists. (hates em)
[ ] Domatophobia - Fear of houses. (ummm no)
[ ] Dystychiphobia - Fear of accidents. (I am an ACCIDENT)

E
[ ] Ecophobia - Fear of the home.
[ ] Elurophobia - Fear of cats.
[ Ephebiphobia - Fear of teenagers.
[ ] Equinophobia - Fear of horses.

G
[ ] Gamophobia - Fear of marriage. (I donÂt fear it , but I wonÂt ever get married anyways)
[ ] Genuphobia - Fear of knees. (knees are pretty)
[ ] Glossophobia - Fear of speaking in public.(I donÂt likes it, but I donÂt fear it either)
[ ] Gynophobia - Fear of women. (no ..not really)

H
[ ] Heliophobia - Fear of the sun.
[ ] Hemophobia - Fear of blood. (not afraid but I pass out at the sight of blood)
[ ] Herpetophobia - Fear of reptiles. ( reptiles=awesome shit dude)
[ ] Hydrophobia - Fear of water. (I bathe frequently)

I
[ ] Iatrophobia - Fear of doctors.(hates em)
[ ] Insectophobia - Fear of insects. (we have a mutual understanding of intense disliking)

K
[ ] Koinon... ]]> ~bbelill HAHAHA another quiz! http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/18407792/ http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/18407792/ Mon, 19 May 2008 22:55:35 PDT

IMMATURITY TEST

[X] You have eaten fish food. (I was five, shush)
[X] You have eaten dog food. (I was seven and curiousÂ and stupid)
[X] You have eaten cat food. (well yuhÂI tried dog food ..didnÂt seem right not to try cat food)
[X] You have run into a glass door. (donÂt look at me like that)
[X] You have eaten an ant.(I did it to disturb my motherÂIT WORKED

)
[ ] You have eaten grass. (woahÂactually I havenÂtÂhow odd.)
[ ] You have licked a tree (I am not the chick from ÂSuperstar”

[X] You have polka dotted underwear. (yup yup, and they are CUTE)
[ ] You have pink underwear. (LOL actually I have every color BUT pink)
[X] You had contests with your friends to see who can create the loudest burp. (lol and lost everytime)
[X] You have screamed a random word in public. (many timesÂ who hasnÂt?)
[ ] You wave at people you don't know. (actuallyÂno)
[X] You have flushed the toilet because you were bored. (lol yups)
[ ] You have slapped yourself out of boredom. ( nooo…

[X] You sing the "FUN" song.( F is for FIRE that burns down the whole town! U is for uranium...BOMBS
N FOR NO SURVIVORSSS When yo... [link])

[ ] You hold conversations with a pillow, blanket, stuffed animal etc.(o_o)
[ ] You dream of llamas coming out of peoples' butts(WTF?)
[X] You think people who eat brains are cool.(*nods* zombies=awesome)
[X] You sing karaoke even though you know you're horrible.
[X] You know how to spell "supercallafragalisticespialadosious" by heart.(I can say it without stumbling too)
[X] You make up your own words and use them with people who have no clue what they mean.
[X] You have a new haircolor every 5-7 months.(currently it is a reddish color)
[ ] you have striped socks and you have wore them so people can see them.
[ ] You have hugged a random person. (I am not a people personÂin fact I barely tolerate myself)
[X] You have ran up+down the stairs cuz you were bored. (it is called exercise)
[ ] You have created a puppet show with your socks out of boredom. (O_O people do that?)
[X]You have imagined people saying "bla" and blowing up.
[X] You just tried imagining people saying "bla" and blowing up.(LOL damn ya caught me)
[X] You are addicted to the Anamaniacs themesong. (*sings* Wakko packs away the snacks, While Bill Clinton plays the sax-ï [link])

[ ] You are addicted to "The Pinky and the Brain" theme song. ( lol..actually no)
[X] You have stared at your ceiling for over 10 minutes. (who doesnÂt?)
[X] You talk to yourself. (and yell at myself to)
[ ] You have conversations with your imaginary friends (I donÂt have any)

Total: 21 O_O

63 %Âholy sheet I am very immature apparentlyÂNAHÂI just have more fun

Carpathian Forest-Diabolism

~bbelill okay many many features! http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/18083944/ http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/18083944/ Tue, 29 Apr 2008 09:54:07 PDT
first of all, a friend

held a writing contest a little while ago and asked me if i would contribute a prize of some sort for the contestants. we agreed upon a one week feature for the fourth place winner. so without further ado....

has won fourth place in the "betterment for humanity" contest. to check out the poem go here----> [link] (psst...it is actually quite good so check it out!)

hmm *thinks* what the hell else...ahhh yes... i would love to say THANKYOU to

do you want to know what she did?! okay i will tell you. a while ago i posted a poem entitled "shattered and forgotten", well she messaged me telling me that my poem inspired her to draw something for it and if i would mind if she drew it and than posted it on da *snorts loudly* as if i would mind! i was all like"omg ...u....i...omg" seriously so freaking pumped. anyways. im sure you want to see it so here ya go--->

it is AMAZING

thankyou again for my lovely picture, I LOVES IT SO MUCH (hehehe and the sporking

)

ONLY TWO DAYS OF CLASSES LEFT AND THEN I HAVE FINALS *gulps* YIKES! what the hell am i doing sitting here typing this stuff out...i have to do something...umm what is that word called again...OH YEAH, I MUST STUDY...eeeeeeeepppppppp

ps- same writer of the week / different poem/ check her out cuz on wensday there will be a new writer!!!

PEOPLE I ANNOY DAILY(you should to

)
--------------------------------

Writer of the Week~

- she is a wonderful writer who shows real potential ...go check her out!

Queen of Twilight~

She dances from place to place,
With moonlight on her face,
A lady in and of the night,
She'll kiss the boys and make them cry,

Light as a fairy with twice the... ]]> ~bbelill only 3 weeks until finals *gulp* http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/17883871/ http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/17883871/ Wed, 16 Apr 2008 16:33:45 PDT
ooo but i did get to set up class schedule for next semester^^ im going to be buusssyyyy , here it is :

Corrections institutions- MWF - 11am-noon

Law Enforcement Fundamentals- W- 6pm-9pm

American Government- MWF- 1pm-2pm

Social Problems- MWF- 10am-11am

But they should be interesting at least.

anywho. I was almost in a really bad car accident. i was driving to class when for no reason whatsofucking ever, this asshole in a dodge pickup truck(which would have eaten my blue kia like a cracker) swerves into my lane, if i wouldn't have swerved onto the curb he would have hit me head on! and get this! HE WAS MY NEIGHBOR! the one who is constantly getting the cops called on him by my fellow neighbors(he drinks alot, which usually results in him standing on his porch at three in the morning(nude *shudders* ewwwie) screaming at imaginary people)

so yeah, no fun, anyways, new writer , check it out!!

PEOPLE I ANNOY DAILY(you should to

)
--------------------------------

Writer of the Week~

-new to the Deviantart scene, he is amazingly talented. when i first stumbled upon his writing it was in his journal... i thought they were beautiful so i asked him to post his work so i could collect them. i wish i had the words to tell you exactly how i feel about his work, and why he is worth checking out..but i can't, just trust me..check him out

His Only Weakness...-

If i told you that you were mine forever
Would i set your gentle skin to tremble

If i promised you anything you could ever have
Would you take the time to join me on my path

If i would gladly trade my life in return for yours
Would you let me hold you forever in these arms

Walk with me a moment
And show me that you care
I have shed my blood for you
In hopes you'd stop and share

Yet you walk on oblivious to my pain
At what point do i justify, fly and not fall
I've reached my hand out, in hopes to grasp
Caught upon yourself, i'm left despite it all

And though i am a bastard to your love
I continue to love you along my graceful decent
Tears turn to blood, the pain hurts no more
All i have given to you, has never made a dent

I have finally been defeated
I set into my minds own trap
Not caring what tomorrow brings
My life's pulse dead, i do not react

.................................................

There you were tears upon your face
Screaming out to me in all that open space

Feeling scared, lost , and used
Where could i be you wondered
Why have i left you, to let you be abused

And by my side you stayed
Despite my loss of sanity

Wishing just once to have me look into... ]]> ~bbelill Snow keeps falling on my head http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/17802873/ http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/17802873/ Fri, 11 Apr 2008 21:16:22 PDT
okay, i know i said i wouldn't change my journals again, but i couldn't resist (im worse than a kid in a candy store..plus i am easily amused...bad combination

)

hmm lets see..oh yeah, it is snowing again. i don't think spring will ever be here

but oh well, at least i will get to wear hoodies forever!!! yay hoodies!!

hehehe i found some new emoticons that i

and

hehehe

they are just so adorable

OH! i wanted to thank EVERYONE for your amazing support lately, seriously, YOU GUYS ROCK!
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.

PEOPLE I ANNOY DAILY(you should to

)
--------------------------------

Writer of the Week~
----------------------------

~-she is wonderful, a great poet who deserves a chance in the spotlight, check her out, she shows amazing promise

Introduction~

Each alliteration and
allusion, every metaphor
and enjambmentÂ
[Peek-a-boo,
sweetie pie,
I
see
you.]

Welcome to my
windowpane
of words.

My insides are an
omnibus
of Eliot, Byron, Sexton
and Plath, painted by
Ophelia, under the tutelage
of Millais.

Come in, sit down
celebrate my unbirthday,
and throw the teapot on
my marble floor. IÂll take
the shattered slivers of
poison plaster, and unite
myself with Romeo.
[Peek-a-boo,
sweetie pie,
I
seeÂ]
-------------------------
credit for this journal belongs to

]]> ~bbelill polynomials, binomials, and trinomials...OH MY! http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/17756993/ http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/17756993/ Wed, 09 Apr 2008 00:04:58 PDT

..| the twisted happenings of my day |..
you know that saying "beauty is in the eye of the beholder" ? what does it mean to you? when you look at a person..do you look past the shell to try and see what is within?

i know you're probably scratching your head and asking "where are you going with this bubbles?" i'm not really all that sure...just something that has been on my mind alot lately. some of my fellow students have taken a liking to calling me scarface. (which is rather pathetic if you ask me..its not even original for fucks sake) and it got me thinking. how much does a person's look add into the reason you choose to talk to someone? now don't get me wrong , im not judging, im just curious i suppose. a girl actually told me that i would be "pretty" if i would start wearing makeup. this truely stunned me. i don't wear makeup, ever. besides, i have nothing to be ashamed about. my scars are not something that i need to cover up. why would i want to look like the other millions of girls out there..when my face is just fine with out outside influence? besides NEWSFLASH...that shit is not healthy for your skin.

*looks up*

sorry for the rant. but man do i feel better getting that out.

anywho, getting to the title of today's journal. lately i have been stressing about an alg exam (that i took today) and for the past few nights i have been pulling allnighter cram sessions (DON'T LECTURE ME, i get enough of that in real life..besides you do it to , don't bother denying it) i was so stressed out about this that i dreamt that the "nomials" were chasing me around yelling "FIND MY GCF" "FACTOR OUT MY GCF" "GROUP US OR PERSIH" (im dead serious, i actually dreamt this..you can't make this shit up) but i can safely say that I KICKED SOME MAJOR NOMIAL ASS TODAY!!

hahaha, *rubs hands together* i hope if i sleep tonight that i dream of them again *picks up giant eraser* ahahaaha i am ready for them now!

OH! ONE MORE THING...we have a new writer of the week..check it out...!

..| People i harrass...and i suggest you do as well |..

..| song of the day |..

Letters to Cleo- Come on- [link]

lyrics-

You can talk
You can talk about it yeah......
If I'm wrong
If I'm wrong I'll take the blame
You can talk
And as the hours slip away
As my own
I can call another day

Come on, come on
To my embrace
How you sleep so easy is
A mystery

I've got my ear
Pressed to the glass
Pressed to the wall
I wasn't sure
But I think I got it all
And it was too late
For any lame apologies
By the way
It's your second face I didn't see
About what I heard
And I just can't believe it's true
All the things I didn't know about you
So won't you

Come on, come on
A lie awaits
How you sleep so easy is
A mystery

Won't you
Come on, come on
To my embrace

So you can talk
And as the hours slip away
As my own
I can call another day ~bbelill *grumbles* *tries to put bandaid on* http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/17719087/ http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/17719087/ Sun, 06 Apr 2008 16:34:03 PDT

..| the twisted happenings of my day |..
i cut my leg shaving this morning

lovely way to start the damn day...don't you think? so yeah, anyways ...

im taking a writing break from my stupid essay for like an hour and then i will get back to it (due tomorrow) im so pissed off with it that if i try to write anymore right this second i will probably want to set the damn thing on fire *smirks*

i have to take a mop of some sort to the basement, all of our snow from this winter is melting and therefore i have an insta-pool in my basement....why must i clean this up you ask? because that is where my washing machine and dryer are and the water that is pooled all over is damn cold on the feet

not a fun experience *shivers* in fact..it is rather awful.

im such a freak. seriously. i finally fell asleep at like 3 in the morning only to wake up partially(because something popped into my head in my dream that i wanted to write down for a future poem/story) and attempt my stairs to find paper and pen. because i didn't bother to wait until i had awakened fully(i didn't want to forget it) i fell down the stairs again...no not the full flight..i made it most of the way down and suddenly somehow forgot that i had 4 more steps before i would be on solid ground. so yeah, ow. *ponders the idea of putting coffee pot in my bedroom for such instances*

hmm what else..oh yes, my newest chapter of my story will be posted soon...probably sometime this coming week...but i promise nothing.

*looks at clock* damn...i have to get back to writing the paper from hell....new writer next journal.

..| People i harrass...and i suggest you do as well |..

..| song of the day |..

Letters to Cleo- Come on- [link]

lyrics-

You can talk
You can talk about it yeah......
If I'm wrong
If I'm wrong I'll take the blame
You can talk
And as the hours slip away
As my own
I can call another day

Come on, come on
To my embrace
How you sleep so easy is
A mystery

I've got my ear
Pressed to the glass
Pressed to the wall
I wasn't sure
But I think I got it all
And it was too late
For any lame apologies
By the way
It's your second face I didn't see
About what I heard
And I just can't believe it's true
All the things I didn't know about you
So won't you

Come on, come on
A lie awaits
How you sleep so easy is
A mystery

Won't you
Come on, come on
To my embrace

So you can talk
And as the hours slip away
As my own
I can call another day
About what I heard
And I just can't believe it's true
All of things I shoulda known about you
So won't you

Come on, come on
To my embrace
How you sleep so easy is
A mystery

Won't you
Come on, come on
To my embrace
How you sleep so easy

..|writer of the week|..

Sunset-

Glorious light shining bright
Dancing at the edge of night
Colors dance and sing
To this sunset do I cling

Each color is vibrant, burning
It fills my... ]]> ~bbelill hehe, finally found a layout i LOVE! http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/17691546/ http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/17691546/ Fri, 04 Apr 2008 23:09:54 PDT

..| the twisted happenings of my day |..
i know, i changed it again?! yup..but i love this one..so

. anywho. i was going to scrap my latest poem but many people asked me not to, so i won't, i am glad you guys enjoyed it that much

my brother comes home today!! he plans on spending next weekend here...i can't wait!!! seriously, i keep cleaning my house ...that is how nervous i am

he hasn't seen the tat's on my hand yet..so i am a bit nervous about that.

speaking of which, apparently he has one as well (his very first) *sniffles* i am so proud

..| People i harrass...and i suggest you do as well |..

..| song of the day |..

Finger Eleven - "Falling On" - [link]

lyrics-
When you feel so close to some resolve
And you write the words you were writing for
But your courage gets dissolved
Into what, I don't know...

When you feel that way again
You have to stop your thinking
And think of what you're here for
And let the rest of your feelings go

[chorus:]
You've got to find your balance
You've got to realize
You've got to try to find what's right before your eyes
And if you find you've fallen
And all your grace is gone
Just scream for me and I'll be what you're falling on

When you feel so close to some resolve
And you say the things that you're standing for
Don't let your courage get dissolved
Cause it's then that the fear grows

[chorus]

Just give me the word and I will be there

Just give me the words that I've been living for
Just tell me the things you might have felt before
It's do or die -- this is either/or
Just give me the word and I will be there
Just give me the word and I will be there

[chorus x2]

..|writer of the week|..

Sunset-

Glorious light shining bright
Dancing at the edge of night
Colors dance and sing
To this sunset do I cling

Each color is vibrant, burning
It fills my soul with yearning
O my heart, out do I cry
That this moment might never die

Soon I am lost, flowing with the wave
Colors swim and flow around, may I never touch the ground
Up here do I wish to stay
Lost in colors till the end of days

Alas, does my heart give cry
For now the sun is under sky
The moon is rising, my heart is sighing
My soul shall always fly

Layout made by Kezzi-Rose, copyright Â©

Hello everyone, as you can see i have changed things around a bit. i think this journal layout is more ...me

anyways, because i am retarded when it comes to computers(seriously..no joke) i cheated and found a free css that someone else made , so the person who deserves the credit is

^^ but this is going to have to be a short journal entry...i am supposed to be typing up my interview paper for C.J. class tomorrow...ehehehe(don't look at me like that i needed a break so

) anywho, i still have some tweaks to work out, but i am pretty much done. hope you like it!!

song of the day~ Madonna - Like A Prayer (the original version

) here- [link]

my writer of the week shall be a man that has great talent.

he has a wonderful way of drawing the reader in, painting a picture, and making you feel. enjoy

Moon Light

Moon shining bright and high
Cast shadows upon the sky
Twixt shinning stars
Dancing in my eye

O serenity of the night
Deepened cold, breath gone white
Misty air and frozen wind
Dance upon my skin

Perhaps one day you shall see
Everything dancing up there for me
For now it shall be
Mine own world of serenity

~ this my dear friends is a comic that

and I have been working on, if you have a moment you should check it out ^^

an amazing writer and a great friend

wonderful photographer, amazing person

seriously, check him out.

]]> ~bbelill not sure i will be back on tonight. http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/17559577/ http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/17559577/ Fri, 28 Mar 2008 15:23:45 PDT

Imagination-Overload

don't forget to check out the web-comic that

and i have created for you!
-->

Song of the day- Window song by Finger Eleven

hope you enjoy...[link]

THREE THINGS THAT SCARE ME:
01 | sleeping
02 | stairs (for obvious reasons)
03 | basements (do not make fun of me, I said I was afraid, not that I donÂt go into them)

THREE PEOPLE WHO MAKE ME LAUGH:
01 |

02 |

03 |

(this is the person who gave me the nickname sporkyÂ.enough said)

THREE THINGS I LOVE:
01 | BOOKS (you should know this by now)
02 | the northern lights
03 | quiet places

THREE THINGS I HATE:
01 | falling down/up the stairs(this annoys me as much as it is painful)
02 | walking into walls(embarrassingÂbut I canÂt help but read while I walkÂwhat else is there to do?)
03 | being very forgetful(this is just down right frustrating at times)

THREE THINGS I DON'T UNDERSTAND:
01 | peoples need to constantly be doing something(seriously, donÂt you guys everÂchill?)
02 | Gaelic ( beautiful to listen to(like a song) and someday I will learn this language..)
03 | calculus ( and no I donÂt want toÂ for it scares me a bit as well)

THREE THINGS ON MY DESK:
01 | a novel I am currently reading ( LE GaspÂ I know shocker right?)
02 | a webcam I never use
03 | and a baseball cap I was wearing earlier (memo to me…

ut the damn thing away)

THREE THINGS I'M DOING RIGHT NOW:
01 | contemplating what I should wear when I go out tonight(IÂm thinking Âmy tripp skirt ^^)
02 | filling out this silly thing
03 | listening to Dissection

THREE THINGS I WANT TO DO BEFORE I DIE:
01 | become a profiler
02 | go to Ireland, find a real pub, and join in the merrymaking ^^
03 | live

THREE THINGS I CAN DO:
01 | recite my abcÂs ( O_O donÂt look at me like thatÂ I can)
02 | occasionally ÂI can down the stairs without falling.
03 | sing(when no one is watching...so hahahaha you will never know if I speak truth)

THREE WAYS TO DESCRIBE MY PERSONALITY:
01 | an acquired taste
02 | so stubborn even bulls give up.
03 | adequate

THREE THINGS I CAN'T DO:
01 | whistle
02 | cartwheels ( O_O )
03 | touch my nose with my tongue( ewww)

THREE THINGS I THINK YOU SHOULD LISTEN TO:
01 | mansonÂs version of Âthis is HalloweenÂ
02 | your heart (sounds corny I knowÂ it is true)
03 | apartment 13 by golgotha (*sighs* wonderful)

THREE THINGS I DON'T THINK YOU SHOULD LISTEN TO EVER:
01 | H.I.M.
02 | simple plan
03 | humans

THREE THINGS I SAY THE MOST:
01 | blow me (when I am irritated)
02 | mostesteredly ( I know it is not a word, but I always win an argument by saying this soÂbite me)
03 | fabulous (in a sarcastic tone)

THREE OF YOUR ABSOLUTE FAVORITE FOODS:
01 | pasta ( Alfredo sauce with angel hair pasta and shrimpÂyummy)
02 | broccoli (little trees are yummy, but ucky with that gross cheese sauce)
03 | asparagus (steamed in butterÂ*kisses fingers* delicious )

THREE THINGS YOU'D LIKE TO LEARN:
01 | Gaelic
02 | French
03 | and how to read hieroglyphics

THREE BEVERAGES YOU DRINK REGULARLY:
01 | jolt (blue raspberry)
02 | orange juice
03 | coke zero

THREE SHOWS YOU WATCHED WHEN YOU WERE A KID:
01 | fraggle rock
02 | pepper ann
03 | rockoÂs modern life

THREE THINGS THAT GROSS YOU OUT:
01 | people(seriously, some people are disgusting)
02 | grasshoppers (creepy littl... ]]> ~bbelill Cheers. http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/17518909/ http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/17518909/ Wed, 26 Mar 2008 00:36:34 PDT

Imagination-Overload

don't forget to check out the web-comic that

and i have created for you!
-->

Song of the day- Window song by Finger Eleven

hope you enjoy...[link]

lyrics to Window Song-

All the windows are playing their game
Where I won't see outside again
Til I write all the fog away
I'm putting words in their place
Between me and the window's pane
From my inarticulate brain
But all of the fog is erased
When I write all the words that I never said
To you

Now the impulse won't go away
"Distracted by something?" you'd say
Cause you don't see anything
It's just between windows and me
Wait til it rains again
And I write all the words that I never said
To you

Will you try to read these lines?
Focus hard and give it time
Who you are in my life
Reads as the water washes

Now the dirt on the window is showing
I should have drawn something instead
The dirt on the window is showing
I should never have written my head
I should never have written what I never said
To you

The twisted happenings of my day

O_O okay, so i had that criminal justice exam today...i think i did well...i am pretty sure i did well (o god i hope i did well) we had an interesting guest speaker today...officer Whitt...he was amazing to listen to. he is a michigan state trooper and part of the E.S.T. he has been on the force for over 20 years and some of the stuff he has witnessed is just...incredible(for lack of a better term). the ucky part about class is she assigned 4 chapters of reading material along with the terms and questions at the end of each due next tuesday (is afraid to look in the book to see how many terms that is...*shudders*)

*thinks* oh yeah, Question...who here likes to feel like a jackass? *looks out at you* oh come on...anyone? no? ...hmm.. me neither. what i mean by this is that during my cj class the rest of the afternoon classes were called off (due to the electrical fairys suddenly deciding that the school did not need power) but we were told that the evening classes ( meaning any classes that start at 4 and later) were to start on time. well at 3:45 i showed up for my four o'clock class and sat down to wait patiently for class to begin.... 4:15 still no one here...i waited half an hour for a class that even the professor decided not to attend.

GUESS WHAT!!! my brother is coming home on leave for twenty whole days

(i will probably get to see him for like 3 of those but i will take what i can get) he comes home april 4th, i can't wait to see him(i have not seen him since before christmas

) but with this good news comes a bit of bad news...when his twenty days are up..he goes to japan ..for two years

i miss him if he has gone for two months...what the hell am i going to do for two years??? *sighs* yeah yeah i know, stop being a pansy sporky and deal with it. i will, i promise...just a bit down right now...need time to process it and then i will be fine.

well , that is all for now.

one last thing...CHECK OUT THE FEATURED POET. you will not regret it.

Fellow artists whom i admire

she is an amazing writer and artist. check her out

and last but definitly not least is a friend of mine whom i admire greatly. he is a ve... ]]> ~bbelill i posted this journal twice without a title..hahah http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/17499550/ http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/17499550/ Mon, 24 Mar 2008 19:58:55 PDT

Imagination-Overload

don't forget to check out the web-comic that

and i have created for you!
-->

Song of the day-

a special song for

...even though i don't care for this group much, i know it is one of his favored ones...so here it is ...

venus blue- by acid bath

[link]

RANDOM QUIZ TIME!!!

stolen from

~~~~~
Â A
-What is your age? 21
-Astrology sign? the thingy with the scales

Â B
-Do you know anyone named Brian? nope
-When is your birthday? im not telling
-Ever been stung by a bee? yes, and then i found out i was allergic(hives ...ew)

Â C
-What's your favorite candy? gummi bears...and the yellow one just ate my shoe *chases yellow bear* come here! i want to eat joooo!!
-What color is your car? nonexistant

Â D
-Do you daydream? too busy...i nightdream though..does that count?
-What's your favorite kind of dog? hmm tough one...i would have to say ...st benards..i know they drool(which is why i will never own one) but they are a loyal dog..and goofy..^^ great combination.

Â E
-Have you ever been in the emergency room? more than i can count
-Ever swam with sharks? nope, that would require a bathing suite of some sort

Â F
-Do you use fly swatters? lol teamed up with some kind of house hold cleaner and i become sporky the bug huntress!!!
-Is there a fan in your room? yup, and even though it is only 21 degrees outside..it is on^^
-Does the number four have any significance? horsemen?

ÂG
-Do you ever chew gum? yes
-Do you like gory movies? depends

ÂH
-How are you? slightly chilled..and you?
-What's your height? 5'8...
-What color is your hair? currently? copper..but if you stick around it is likely to change(it does ..often, two days ago it was blue..well green..that is why i dyed it^^)

Â I
-Have you ever ice skated? twice..*shrugs* was not impressed
-Favorite ice cream? mint-chocolate chip.

ÂJ
-Favorite jelly bean?one that isn't near me.
-Do you wear jewelry? yup(three rings, and earings)

Â K
-Who do you want to kiss? what do you hear?
-Have you ever flown a kite? actually no...
-Do you think kangaroos are cute? heck ya, especially when they kick someone, then they are funny and cute.

Â L
-Are you laid back? depends
-Lions or tigers? and bears..oh my!
-Do you like black licorice? y.u.c.k.

Â M
-Favorite place at the mall? the exit sign( i don't like shopping..it is annoying)
-Favorite movie? which genre?

Â N
-Do you prefer night or day? night
-Do you have a nickname? several

Â O
-Are you an only child? Nope
-Do you like the color orange? yes, but without pulp (pulp is gross)

Â P
-Do you know anyone named Penelope? actually yes, a friend from the past.

Â Q
-Do you like game shows? hmm kinda...
-Do you collect the state quarters? no(i spend them...hahaha)

Â R
-Do you think you're always right? nope, i am actually usually very very wrong.
-Do you watch reality tv? no
-Do you prefer sun or rain? i like the rain....it is ..calming.

Â S
-How many pair of shoes do you have? 3
-Do you like wearing sun glasses? *shrugs* i have never worn them (i have glasses)

ÂT
-Time to go to sleep? when my body quits

Â U
-Can you ride a unicycle? i can't even walk down the stairs..what makes you think i would go near a unicycle?

Â V
-Did you ever watch Vegetables? huh?

Â W
-What's your worst habit? playing with sporks ^^

Â X
-Have you ever had an x-ray? yup

Â Y
-Do you like the color yellow? sometimes
-Do you yell when you're angry? no, when i am really angry..i get very quiet.

Â Z
-Do you believe in Zodiac... ]]> ~bbelill LIFE IS A CABARET!!!! (lol sometimes) http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/17450813/ http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/17450813/ Fri, 21 Mar 2008 22:43:06 PDT

Imagination-Overload

don't forget to check out the web-comic that

and i have created for you!
-->

Song of the day-

a special song for

...even though i don't care for this group much, i know it is one of his favored ones...so here it is ...

venus blue- by acid bath

[link]

EVERYONE...YOUR ATTENTION PLEASE!!!!

today is a very special day..for a special person.(actually depending on where you are i might be a few days early.. *shrugs* oh well..you get the point)

IT IS

's birthday!! his 21 st in fact. (which in the united states means he is legal to drink...but he lives in a better country

and he doesn't drink..so it is no big deal) anyways.

all of you should go to his page and wish him a happy birthday and while your at it..check out his poems/songs...they are very good(in fact the only reason why i haven't featured him is because he has over 4000 pageviews...i only feature "newer" writers)

okay so yeah...like i said happy birthday to you(are you annoyed with me yet??) and i hope that it is a happy and eventfull one for you!

the poem that you wanted is not done yet *hangs head in shame* sorry...but it will be done soon, i just want to make sure it is good.

The twisted happenings of my day

it has been an off day in brittniland today.
i have had a headache all day because the evil little nymphs broke my glasses today(fyi-i am practically blind without them..farsighted in the right eye, nearsighted in the left...in other words I SEE BLOBS...not shapes....BLOBS.) but along with said headache...my freaking muse also paid me a visit only guess what??? HE DIDN'T GIVE ME ONE ENTIRE POEM...instead he gave me random lines to possibly 3 different poems *mutters* and i think he was laughing at me *looks sad* *sighs* even my muse laughs at me. than to top it all off, i went to get some food from the kitchen and on my way back to the computer the dwarf of tripping paid me a magickal visit and made me trip over my own shoe(talk about adding insult to injury) causing me to fall and dump orange juice all over myself...so i smelt ...yummy..but was ultimatley sticky...which was no good. (*sighs* yes i know you all are laughing at me...especially

...i bet you find this incredibly amusing)

you know what?? i think i need to live in a bubble wrap world*doesn't recall the name for the packaging material* you know?? the kind that you get around breakables...and you pop them and of course are entertained for the next like 4 hours?? yeah..i think i need to be in that kind of world....wait...no i am sure i would find some way to hurt myself or make a mess...*sighs* i need a freaking keeper.

*thinks* oh yeah...good news...

comes back tomorrow.. i can't freaking wait, life has been a bit ...well dull and i can't wait to chill with her again....*waits by the door*

hmm oh...i forgot to mention, i was able to go and see the musical CABARET last friday...i have seen this many times done by many different casts..but this was by far the greatest *kisses fingertips* truely wonderful. i loved it. oh and get this. i was wearing a guy's extra-large t-shirt(one that has a box on it and has the words "i can i think outside the box when they won't let me out of the damn thing?" beneath the box) and a pair of my ext... ]]> ~bbelill Spring Break...time to rest (HA!) http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/17388153/ http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/17388153/ Mon, 17 Mar 2008 22:57:42 PDT

Imagination-Overload

don't forget to check out the web-comic that

and i have created for you!
-->

Song of the day-

Diary of Dreams - Mankind Live

[link]

THINGS TO DO:

1) get started on chapter five

2) finish request from

(i didn't forget..just been working really hard lately)

3) finish request from

(hmm this one is taking forever, it is harder than i thought it would be)

4)interview local sheriff for criminal justice(essay due when we go back

)

5) Get started on algebra

( i really don't want to..hmm maybe there is a ...no i have to do it...damn *sighs* ..i swear.. math will be the death of this girl..or a staircase)

6) Finish the 5 different poems i have started and then just left (i am such a procrastinator...why do you put up with me??? )

The twisted happenings of my day

okay, so alot of you are wondering what the fuck is going on with me right? to which i reply sorry, it has been a bit of a rough week.

first, last week was midterm week, so i was studying really hard to make sure that i was prepared for my exams. (this was no fun

) but i am pretty sure i did well so..

than *sighs* i did something really stupid...i worked on two poems...and are you ready for this??... i did what i said i wasn't going to do...i sent them into that poetry contest. *looks anxious* it is incredibly nervewracking.

oh, ready to laugh at me??? i fell down my staircase again, only this time i did some damage to my body, plus i have rugburn on my feet, legs, arms, and back. i had just woken up(which means i was walking and dreaming about coffee and just crawling back into my bed) and i went to walk down the stairs and the next thing i know i am at the bottom in a heap going "how the fuck did that happen??" *whimpers* i hurt so bad right now

*wishes i wasn't so clumsy...or that i at least had enough common sense to wake up before i attempted stairs*

and

went home to work, so i will be on my own for spring break

okay, even though it has been a while i do have a new writer of the week, so check it out!!

Fellow artists whom i admire

she is an amazing writer and artist. check her out

and last but definitly not least is a friend of mine whom i admire greatly. he is a very talented writer.

if you get a chance you should definitly check these artists out, for they are truely amazing and i only hope that one day i have half the talent that they seem to have in thier little fing... ]]> ~bbelill 100 question quiz thing http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/17339896/ http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/17339896/ Fri, 14 Mar 2008 23:18:59 PDT

Imagination-Overload

don't forget to check out the web-comic that

and i have created for you!
-->

Song of the day-

sevendust- face to face

[link]

List 100 things about your self

1) Full Name: i don't know(i forgot)

2) Male/Female: Female(most days)

3) Were you named after anyone?: i told you i can't remember ...lay off!
4) Does your name mean anything?: if i could fucking remember i would...wait..no i still wouldn't tell you
5) Nick Name(s): hmm bri bri, sporky, sunshine, lady steel, speedy turtle, ...hmm there is more..but i am not telling you those...wait no, i will tell you one more...bubbles

6) Who do you think you look like: well there is this girl who is in the mirror every morning ....

7) Date Of Birth: september 29, 1986

8) Place of Birth and Current Location: the sperm doner and personal incubator claimed they found me under a rock.

9) Nationality: american(ugh)

10) Astrology Sign: libra???(not really sure)

11) Chinese Astrology Sign: i have no fucking clue

12) Religion: no thankyou

13) WhatÂs your favorite smell?: books

14) Political Position?: again no thankyou

15) What do you prefer to drink in the morning?: Coffee, or jolt...give me the caffine and no one gets killed
16) Hair + Eye color: currently? blue and shit brown

17) Do you look like anyone famous?: nope

18) What do you look like?: there is a pic on my page, go look lazy.
19) Any unusual talents?: nope

20) Rightly, Lefty, or Ambidextrous?: Righty

21) Gay, Straight, Bi, or Other?: straight

22) What do you do for a living?: upholstery currently

23) What do you do for fun?: alot of things

24) What are your favorite art materials to work with?: i. don't. draw.

25) What kind of materials would you like to work with?: none

26) Have you met your grandparents?: yes

27) What celebrity would you date if you could?: none

28) Current worries?: that the world will run out of sporks

29) Favorite online Guy/Girl(s): i don't have a fav..i like everyone equally *cheesy grin* you guys know who you are, i talk to ya like every day

30) Favorite place to be?: in the woods, alone

31) Least favorite place to be?: in a place packed with people.

34) Do you burn or tan?: [link].

35) Ever break a bone?: myself no, had someone break my bones? yes.

36) What is your favorite cereal?: yuck.

37) Person you cry with: I. don't. cry.

Do You Have...

38) Any sisters: one(but not by blood)

39) Any brothers: seven.

40) Any pets: todd, my kitty

41) An Illness: umm asthma...

42) A Pager: No

43) A Personal phone line: No

44) A Cell phone: NO

45) A visible birthmark: nope(or non visible either)

46) A Pool or hot tub: neither

47) A Car: No

Describe Your...

48) Personality: mine...

49) Driving: decent(but i hate driving in the winter)

50) Your clothing style: comfy

51) Room: like a room?

52) WhatÂs missing: what isn't?

53) School: school

54) Bed: bed

55) Relationship with your parent(s): nonexistant

56) Do you believe in yourself: do you?

57) Do you believe in love at first sight?: depends, for me?? no. for others??? possible

58) Consider yourself a good listener: i don't know

59) Have a future dream that you would like to share?: nope

60) Get Along with your parents: see previous question

61) Save your e-mail conversations: No

62) Pray: nope

63) Believe in reincarnation: don't know

64) Brush your teeth twice a day?: three times

65) Like to talk on the phone: i hate it.

66) Like to eat?: ???

67) Like to exercise?: yes

68) Like to watch sports?: nope i like to play the sport(not watch a bunch of over paid whiners play)

69) Sing in the car?: does it matter?

70) What is a dream that you have all the time?: none. of. your. busi... ]]> ~bbelill Sevendust-face to face http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/17276016/ http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/17276016/ Mon, 10 Mar 2008 17:57:12 PDT

Imagination-Overload

don't forget to check out the web-comic that

and i have created for you!
-->

Song of the day-

sevendust- face to face

[link]

I HAVE BEEN TAGGED FOR THE THIRD DAMN TIME. *sigh* oh well ...here we go again....(thanks

)

The rules....I must write eight truthful things about myself and then tag eight other people...who in return must write eight truthful things about themselves and tag eight others. Leave a note on thier page saying they've been tagged. hmmm the only person i was going to tag just told me no in no uncertain terms....*whimpers* so i think i will let this die with me!

1) I. am. a. girl.

2) i am surrounded by people who are obsessed with the words : boobs, breasts,jugs, and pillows of wonder... (except for

)

3) i recieved a coffee pot from

because she cares about my sanity.

4)i am a survivor, not a victim.

5) i collect random odds and ends and then end up giving them to other people that i care about (therefore i never actually get to keep my own shit)

6) i say "does that make sense?" even though people usually understand what i am saying...apparently i am a very explanatory creature...according to both

7) you never know what i am going to say...apparently i am incredibly random...for instance a friend just went " hahaha" in random tones, as though very pleased with herself...and i looked at her and said " did you just get off??"

8)it took me 2 hours to come up with 8 fucking facts...i am useless.

The twisted happenings of my day

okay i know i said new writer today, apparently i lied!

bite me i am studying.

Fellow artists whom i admire

she is an amazing writer and artist. check her out

Friends i bug daily

~bbelill HOLY SHIT, 3000 PAGEVIEWS?? http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/17246069/ http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/17246069/ Sat, 08 Mar 2008 19:53:57 PST

Imagination-Overload

don't forget to check out the web-comic that

and i have created for you!
-->

Song of the day-

Cradle Of Filth - The Forest Whispers My Name

[link]

okay, you don't have to do this if you do not feel like it, i did this for a friend and i would like to see how they would answer it for me

but feel free to, if you do feel like doing this just put it in the comments on this journal

HOW WOULD YOU FEEL IF...

1. I died:
2. I kissed you:
3. I lived next door to you:
4. I started smoking:
5. I stole something:
6. I was hospitalized:
7. I ran away from home:
8. I got into a fight and you weren't there?:

WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT MY:

9. Personality:
10. Eyes:
11. Hair:
12. Family:

WOULD YOU:

13. Be my friend?:
14. Keep a secret if I told you one?:
15. Hold my hand?:
16. Take a bullet for me?:
17. Keep in touch?:
18. Try and solve my problems?:
19. Love me?:
20. Date me?:
21. Sing with me?:

HAVE YOU EVER:

22. Lied to make me feel better?:
23. Wanted to kiss me?:
24. Wanted to kill me?:
25. Broke my heart?:
26. Kept something important from me?:
27. Thought I was unbearably annoying?:

MORE:

28. Who are you?:
29. Are we friends?:
30. When and how did we meet?:
31. Describe me in one word:
32. What was your first impression?:
33. Do you still think that way about me now?:
34. What reminds you of me?:
35. If you could give me anything what would it be?:
36. How well do you know me?:
37. When's the last time you saw me?:
38. Ever wanted to tell me something but couldn't?:
39. What song do you think would describe me best?:
40. Are you gonna put this on yours to see what I say about you?:

The twisted happenings of my day

okay *rubs eyes* thankyou so much for the 3000 pageviews, seriously, i can't believe you guys have put up with my crap for almost a year...let alone actually read my "poetry". i was going to write a poem about this but...i have to many other works on the table right now along with homework and other responsibilities, so i will hold off on that one until i reach 4 or 5 thousand page views.

okay firstly, i have taken down my fav photographers photo because sadly he has decided to quit posting on da, this makes me incredibly sad, for he is not just a wonderful artist, he is also a wonderful friend, and one of the few people who actually cared enough to try and make me smile at least once a day. so this part of my journal is for him. THANK YOU SO MUCH

i love you so much, and i say that very rarely, and i never say it if i do not mean it. thankyou for being such a wonderful person, and thankyou for your support in my life.

i hope one day i will see more of your work for it was truely inspiritional to me.

i hope we keep in touch!

okay now for something funny. for those of you who do not know, i live on an incredibly steep hill, and it is the middle of winter for me right now. well

has been coming over lately to chill, and she drives a Jeep Liberty(which she never puts in 4 wheel) okay anyways, wensday she came over(and it was icy) and she parked it next to the snowbank on the side of the street. She was standing outside smoking when all of a sudden... ]]> ~bbelill Sorry Brody, this one will be short, head hurts http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/17170815/ http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/17170815/ Mon, 03 Mar 2008 19:21:09 PST

Imagination-Overload

don't forget to check out the web-comic that

and i have created for you!
-->

Song of the day-

push by matchbox twenty

[link]

I AM A FREAKING LINT LICKER!

The twisted happenings of my day

hmm well i went grocery shopping with

which was...hmm interesting...the little booger kept taking off on me, one second she was there, and next *poof* the magickal fairy of invisibility decided to cloak her appearance from me. (omg, she just totally read my mind...O_O, fucking creepy dude) lol

oh and yes i posted a new poem , and before you say anything yes...i know it is crap *hangs head in shame*(i just totally got smack twice for that little bit of truth)( and again...*rubs thigh* fuck that hurts*)

SHE NEVER FUCKING MISSES!!! GRRR.

HMM..i think i will have to visit the eye tormentor soon, my glasses are starting to cause some really bad men to come and hammer my frontal lobe repeatedly, which is no good. and i have to squint to focus the image with them on, which is even worse...

*looks up at what i just wrote* i am sure i have just bored you to death now. sorry.

Fellow artists whom i admire

she is an amazing writer and artist. check her out

a wonderful friend and photographer, his pictures have inspired a few of my writings.

Friends i bug daily

~bbelill Brave one http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/17155089/ http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/17155089/ Sun, 02 Mar 2008 19:17:49 PST

Imagination-Overload

don't forget to check out the web-comic that

and i have created for you!
-->

Song of the day-
anything for love-meatloaf! (sorry, i am doing some flash backs into my child hood and i love this song! ^^ hope you enjoy)

[link]

OMG, this is a fucking awesome movie, you must watch, NOW!!! stop reading my freaking dumbass journal and go watch the movie!!!

The twisted happenings of my day

okay hopefully you guys will watch that movie, with jodi foster, it.is.MAGIC!

okay, apparently according to some of you i have been ....dissapointing with my journals lately, you have my many appologies for this. i didn't mean to not write, i have just been really....distracted. that and i havent had many "happy" things to talk about and i didn't want to bore you with the drama of my life, so i stayed away. but i am sorry if i ignored you guys, i hope you will forgive me.

so anyways, things happening lately :

1) my hair is a green blue currently, i like it ...alot. i especially like the fact that (because i live in a small town) i get a lot of "wtf's" and stares like this O_O, lol it is funny shit dude, seriously, one woman actually asked me if i had been "saved"

2) i am getting currently getting grades of "b" or better in all of my classes...and i think my english teacher would marry me if i let her o_O HELP !

3) i have eight new books *dances around* yay! woohoo.

4)i have decided not to enter the writing contest...i don't think i am ready for it, besides i write for me, not anyone else.

okay those are the major things right now...i live a sad existance i know...*cries* anywho. Thanks ever so much to my new friend

i got freaking wet twice today! (and no

it was not in a sexual way) we were driving around with the windows open, and she hit two huge puddles of slush on the road, and i got FUCKING SOAKED! *glares at you* don't you dare laugh, it is not funny

...okay it is a bit funny, but it was really fucking cold to.

oh and for two days my arm was in a sling, i was wrestling around and i ended up smashing my arm down really hard on a wooden cabinet door, bruised my arm real good, and my wrist kills right now. but *sighs* it was a blast ! plus

is the one who bandaged me up. she is an emt!! I LOVES YOU CHICKA!!! hahaha, she is a really awesome friend, seriously, she has been keeping me sane right now (been sleeping really horribly) she has been distracting me from my nightmares.

hmm *looks up* holy fuck that is alot of talking *blushes many shades of purple* sorry for rambling so much guys,

anyways, tomorrow i will post a new writer of the week, but for now i think i will end this...oh and i will leave you with a list of things i am working on.

1)latest chap to my story.

2) 3 poems i have been fighting with for 2 months.

3) a poem that is something i have never before tried on here...

requested one as a thankyou for a favor he is doing for me on Urbandead(i am a fucking zombie once more)

4) something happy...but it isn't going very well

Fellow artists whom i admire

~bbelill playing with my hair http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/17111275/ http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/17111275/ Fri, 29 Feb 2008 01:06:27 PST

Imagination-Overload

don't forget to check out the web-comic that

and i have created for you!
-->

Song of the day-
sara evans- no place that far

[link]

is it so much to ask to find love like this?

The twisted happenings of my day

when you have someone in your life...do you appreciate them?

Fellow artists whom i admire

she is an amazing writer and artist. check her out

a wonderful friend and photographer, his pictures have inspired a few of my writings.

Friends i bug daily

writer of the week

poem- Flow
I take my heart,
and let it go,
I write a song,
and let it flow.
Not matter if it's
good or bad,
that's just how I express sad.
I watch the stars,
late at night,
wondering if,
this is right.
It goes on,
forever and a day,
And I feel like,
I have no say.
I seen him him look,
straight at me,
will he ever,
let my heart be?
My heart,
just can't choose,
and in the end,
everyone will loose.
I don't know why,
I can't say bye,
maybe that's why,
I begin to die.
So I take my heart,<... ]]> ~bbelill I AM A JACKASS http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/17081221/ http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/17081221/ Tue, 26 Feb 2008 21:29:41 PST

Imagination-Overload

don't forget to check out the web-comic that

and i have created for you!
-->

Song of the day-
Diary Of Dreams - TraumtÃ¤nzer Live 2003

no damn lyrics today. just enjoy the music

NEW FEATURED WRITER TOMORROW....maybe

The twisted happenings of my day

I FREAKING LOST THE PAPER WITH THE REQUIREMENTS FOR MY ENGLISH 101 PAPER...god i am so screwed, it is due tomorrow, and i don't have the paper that has the assignment on it...*beats head in with a hammer* why am i so freaking stupid??!! *sigh* i am going to try and find that paper now...*rubs head* damn, another freaking headache...great.

Fellow artists whom i admire

she is an amazing writer and artist. check her out

a wonderful friend and photographer, his pictures have inspired a few of my writings.

Friends i bug daily

writer of the week

poem- Flow
I take my heart,
and let it go,
I write a song,
and let it flow.
Not matter if it's
good or bad,
that's just how I express sad.
I watch the stars,
late at night,
wondering if,
this is right.
It goes on,
forever and a day,
And I feel like,
I have no say.
I seen him him look,
s... ]]> ~bbelill A NEW DEVIANT MEMBER!!! HAHAHAHA http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/17022575/ http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/17022575/ Sat, 23 Feb 2008 09:23:47 PST

Imagination-Overload

don't forget to check out the web-comic that

and i have created for you!
-->

Song of the day-
[link]

no damn lyrics today. just enjoy the music

The twisted happenings of my day

HELLO, yes i am trying to get your attention. and now that i have it "picklelintlickerpurplepeopleeater" lol, j/k . anyways, i talked someone into getting a deviantart account on here. she writes, and draws....and has a few other talants(like being an all around fantastic individual.

, she is new to da, and i would love it if you guys would show her the same support and care that you have shown me(this goes to my readers, not the haters(fuck you haters!!!)

which leads me to my next point, i don't care if you hate my shit, i don't care if you think i am sick and twisted, i don't care if you think i am an evil cunted dog bitch from the very bottom of eternal hell.

if you don't like me , stop reading my shit, in other words...quoted by

"BUGGER OFF" or my personal fav "GO PISS UP A ROPE"

Fellow artists whom i admire

she is an amazing writer and artist. check her out

a wonderful friend and photographer, his pictures have inspired a few of my writings.

Friends i bug daily

~bbelill NEW QUIZ ^^ THIS ONE IS COOL http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/16968327/ http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/16968327/ Tue, 19 Feb 2008 19:42:09 PST

Imagination-Overload

don't forget to check out the web-comic that

and i have created for you!
-->

Song of the day-

RULES:
1) Answer the questions below
2) Take each answer and type it into dA search box
3) Take a deviation from the first page of results (may use ' popular' or 'newest' ) and post thumb (for subscribers) or link (non-subscribers)
4) You can't copy the persons answers who posted this before you

1. The age you will be on your next birthday:

hmm no big deal

2. A place you'd like to travel:

i will go here >><< i will!

3. Your favorite place:

it is where i enjoy going to be alone..so i can write in peace.

4. Your favorite object:

no joke, i always have a pen on me with paper so i can write at the drop of a hat!

5. Favorite food:

not really a fav(for i don't have one) but the picture is awesome.

6. Your favorite animal:

i have many, but i was only allowed to choose one

7. Your favorite color:

hmm actually i couldn't find my fav color, so i settled for this.

8. The town/state/etc in which you live:

lol, well i used to live there, close to there anyways, but for those of you who do not know, i preformed there many times during highschool...this is the theatre at michigan tech university!!!(side note- i have done crazier...like jumping into lake superior during winter , skyclad, because i lost a game >><< i never lost again..brrr)

9. Name of past pet:

lol tis true, i loved that dog!!! (i also had a pet named sir didimus at one point)

10. A dream come true:

can anyone guess what my dream is?? i believe i have told one of you

~bbelill click the link!!!! http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/16953806/ http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/16953806/ Mon, 18 Feb 2008 21:38:20 PST

Imagination-Overload

don't forget to check out the web-comic that

and i have created for you!
-->

Book of the day- "In the hall of the dragon king" by-stephen k lawhead-hmm i haven't read this yet, i plan on starting it tonight though after i work out, so i will tell you what i think tomorrow..maybe...if i come on here.

Song of the day-[link]

Kittie - Into The Darkness Lyrics

I feel helpless waiting.
Could this all be the end?
It's all coming down all at once.
Am I losing you?
No Way Out!

Until this all crashes down, I'll hold on.
you're going to make this work
Into the darkness...not knowing at all....
you're going to make this work

Are you out there waiting, wondering about me?
Never felt so alone as I do now.
No way out!

Until this all crashes down, I'll hold on.
you're going to make this work
Into the darkness...Not knowing at all
I'm just trying to make this work

Until this all crashes down, I'll hold on.
Into the darkness...Not knowing at all
Until this all crashes down....

OMG !! i got this link from

's journal, you must watch this for seriously....this is everyone on the freaking internet at one point in time or another click -->
[link]

The twisted happenings of my day

doesn't matter. just doesn't fucking matter anymore.

*looks up* ever feel like that?

don't forget to check out the artist of the week, there is a different poem up , another one that i like from the same person. enjoy.

Fellow artists whom i admire

she is an amazing writer and artist. check her out

a wonderful friend and photographer, his pictures have inspired a few of my writings.

Friends i bug daily

http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/16948173/ Mon, 18 Feb 2008 15:02:37 PST
Song of the day-[link]

Kittie - Into The Darkness Lyrics

I feel helpless waiting.
Could this all be the end?
It's all coming down all at once.
Am I losing you?
No Way Out!

Until this all crashes down, I'll hold on.
you're going to make this work
Into the darkness...not knowing at all....
you're going to make this work

Are you out there waiting, wondering about me?
Never felt so alone as I do now.
No way out!

Until this all crashes down, I'll hold on.
you're going to make this work
Into the darkness...Not knowing at all
I'm just trying to make this work

Until this all crashes down, I'll hold on.
Into the darkness...Not knowing at all
Until this all crashes down....

The twisted happenings of my day

Fellow artists whom i admire

she is an amazing writer and artist. check her out

a wonderful friend and photographer, his pictures have inspired a few of my writings.

Friends i bug daily

writer of the week

poem- Flow
I take my heart,
and let it go,
I write a song,
and let it flow.
Not matter if it's
good or bad,
that's... ]]> ~bbelill bad bad day, rotten freaking day http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/16900005/ http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/16900005/ Fri, 15 Feb 2008 14:22:22 PST

Song of the day-Carpathian Forest-Warlord of Misanthropy , here you go- [link]

The twisted happenings of my day

okay i know i said i would type more earlier, but this day just went crappy to stuck in the raging pit of hell. therefore i am not in the mood to write about random going ons. sorry for bieng a bitch. maybe tomorrow will be better

Fellow artists whom i admire

she is an amazing writer and artist. check her out

a wonderful friend and photographer, his pictures have inspired a few of my writings.

Friends i bug daily

writer of the week

will update this in a bit once i figure this all out (bare with me)

]]> ~bbelill HAPPY V-DAY!!!! http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/16890388/ http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/16890388/ Thu, 14 Feb 2008 20:59:02 PST

Song of the day-Carpathian Forest-Warlord of Misanthropy , here you go- [link]

The twisted happenings of my day

okay, as you can see a couple of things are going on.

1)i put up chapter 4 to my story, enjoy.

2)i have a new watcher...but guess what?! it is me! and

i know , are you confused yet, here let me enlighten you.

do you remember a few days ago when i said i was working on something big with a fellow artist on da?

this is it

me and

have decided to put together a comic for you ^_^ it is about a writer, whose life is very hectic, and all of a sudden .......wait i can't tell you anymore, that would ruin. i guess you will just have to click on it to find out.

please leave all comments on the comic(or questions) on that page. we have a special email set up for those of you who would even like to make requests on theme comics(i.e. a special where all the characters are the opposite sex..or something along those lines...it can really be anything)

we plan on posting 1 new strip a day(we might miss a few..but give us a break we are human)

ooo and while you are there, check out the journal ...there will be a letter a day from one or both of the main characters.

happy valentines day to you all...ooo speaking of which i will be posting a v-day poem sometime tonight...(hopefully)

and i have a question for all of my readers...WILL YOU BE MY VALENTINE???? *awaits answers nervously* hehehe it is okay if you don't want to! LOVE YA ALL!

Fellow artists whom i admire

she is an amazing writer and artist. check her out

a wonderful friend and photographer, his pictures have inspired a few of my writings.

Friends i bug daily

~bbelill i've been working on my journal all the live http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/16863964/ http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/16863964/ Wed, 13 Feb 2008 13:06:40 PST
song of the day and book of the day will be posted later tonight after i monkey with this a bit more.

The twisted happenings of my day

hiya everyone!~

as you can tell i have subscribed to da for a trial of 3 months, in this time i will see if the money was worth it. anyways, i just wanted to say that if i forgot anyone this is a test run so don't freak out on me! im still testing things out so this is probably not even close to be done yet. hmm but for now i will go because i want to figure out how to set up my front page.

Fellow artists whom i admire

she is an amazing writer and artist. check her out

a wonderful friend and photographer, his pictures have inspired a few of my writings.

Friends i bug daily

writer of the week

will update this in a bit once i figure this all out (bare with me)

]]> ~bbelill woot! studying paid off!!! http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/16857134/ http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/16857134/ Wed, 13 Feb 2008 00:06:24 PST
but yeah, anyways i get home and discover that my order from hottopic came in...along with my new "deathnote messenger bag". It has ryuk and light on the front in black and white, and the rules of the deathnote are written on the bag. it is sooooo pretty.*strokes bag* it is my bag,not your bag, my bag. hehehehehe. but yeah, along with the pretty bag came a new pair of pretty "im gonna kick your ass" boots. *happy fan girl squee* so freaking happy.
also in my order from H.T. came my new tripp pant, 3 new shirts, 2 pairs of arm warmers, my hair dye crap, and 3 new comic books.(so by the end of this week i will have bleached my hair, and then it will be a pretty blue color.....*gulp* first time i have ever tried blue....)

okay now on to why i am writing another journal for the same damn day. here it is. i have a little "valentine" surprise for all of my lucky lucky readers. me and a fellow artist in fact will have a very special treat for you. and i am not going to tell you any more about it right now...you can wait two more days, it won't kill ya. so just remember to read thursday's journal(and for those of you who watch me from another freaking country, that would be thursday my time...not your time)

plus thanks to

there will also probably be a new poem just for v-day(which before you ask, no i do not actually care for this holiday, but she won a little contest thingy and requested one of my steamier poems and i figured that if i get it done by then , well it wouldn't hurt to post it.)

hmmm am i forgetting anything*looks up* no i don't think i am... no song or book of the day, it is a freebie...however i am going to attempt to post a new poet/writer of the week before friday(but i am not making promises for i am a forgetful creature)

]]> ~bbelill ENOUGH IS ENOUGH http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/16845674/ http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/16845674/ Tue, 12 Feb 2008 09:32:48 PST
i am going to quote a new friend from his journal on this subject because i honestly couldn't have said it better myself.

-"I REALLY don't think you should be focusing all of your strengths on how many pageviews you have, or how many watchers you have, et al. Or having people tripping all over themselves to get the "ZOMG 122,342TH KIRIBAN" stuff. Yes...Art needs exposure, but...

It should BE ABOUT THE ART. About appreciating your art, and appreciating other's." end quote.

just to add to that a bit ....people should stop bitching and get back to just doing what they do best, it shouldn't matter how many pageviews they get, and if it does matter maybe they should sit down and think about why it matters so much.if the answer is that you are doing it for attention then you are an artist for all the wrong reasons and you should seriously start thinking about what kind of person that makes you.

another thing, if you don't like what you see on the front page there is a simple solution...DON'T LOOK!

i am sorry if i have offended anyone for that was not my main purpose of this journal(let us be honest, i usually end up offending someone so it is not like this is something new)

if you wish to yell at me please feel free to do so. i don't care anymore. i am simply stating my opinion and if you don't like it , then let me point out to you(kindly) that you do not have to be reading it.....i am not standing behind you with a chainsaw forcing you to read this.....or am i? >> <<.

i will update this later for now i have to get back to studying for my exams today...WISH ME LUCK PEOPLE.

]]> ~bbelill some days it is just not worth getting out of bed http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/16825531/ http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/16825531/ Sun, 10 Feb 2008 23:00:32 PST
it didn't even rise above 5 below zero today. and the wind chill just made it worse. that wind just freaking cut through a person like razorblades today.

my fingers are too cold to even type. therefore you are only getting a song of the day today.

here you go "cathy's clown" by Reba McEntire(this was the very first song i heard sung by this particular red-head, and ever since i have been hooked.)

[link]

no lyrics, just listen and watch!

]]> ~bbelill yippie kai aye mother fucker http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/16804572/ http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/16804572/ Sat, 09 Feb 2008 17:28:46 PST
if you need a hint i will give you two...but only one of them can be found in this journal, that clue is going to be the song of the day. the second i will give to those who ask it for it. now come on, make me proud and figure it out!

song of the day- "fortunate son" by Creedence Clearwater Revival .....to those of you who are too young to even recognize the band i will give you a link to listen to the song, along with the lyrics. to those of you who do know not only this song but the band as well, YOU ROCK! this is one of my fav songs. i know it is a bit on the old side but it is wonderful.

here- [link]

lyrics-

Some folks are born to wave the flag,
Ooh, they're red, white and blue.
And when the band plays "Hail to the chief",
Ooh, they point the cannon at you, Lord,

It ain't me, it ain't me, I ain't no senator's son, son.
It ain't me, it ain't me; I ain't no fortunate one, no,
Yeah!

Some folks are born silver spoon in hand,
Lord, don't they help themselves, oh.
But when the taxman comes to the door,
Lord, the house looks like a rummage sale, yes,

It ain't me, it ain't me, I ain't no millionaire's son, no.
It ain't me, it ain't me; I ain't no fortunate one, no.

Some folks inherit star spangled eyes,
Ooh, they send you down to war, Lord,
And when you ask them, "How much should we give?"
Ooh, they only answer More! more! more! yoh,

It ain't me, it ain't me, I ain't no military son, son.
It ain't me, it ain't me; I ain't no fortunate one, one.
It ain't me, it ain't me, I ain't no fortunate one, no no no,
It ain't me, it ain't me, I ain't no fortunate son, no no no, no

]]> ~bbelill hmm apartment 13..could it be love? http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/16783888/ http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/16783888/ Fri, 08 Feb 2008 11:53:56 PST
okay, now to get to the point ( i know i know...my god , you mean she can actually focus long enough to explain something???? to which i reply...yes...*gasp*)

anyways, along with my new found love of a band (carpathian forest) i have also found a new love of a song entitled "apartment 13"- golgotha.

is responsible for leading me to this perfection of lyrics. i don't normally like the music that comes from Dax Riggs, but i must say that this song just might be changing that. i am going to have to look more carefully and see if i can find any other of his hidden treasures.

!WARNING! IF YOU DO NOT LIKE BLACK METAL, OR GRAPHIC LYRICS , DO NOT LISTEN OR READ THE LYRICS BENEATH THIS MESSAGE. i understand that some of you would not appreciate this type of music, and that is fine. please understand that i am not posting it to offend your sensibilities, i am merley posting it because i have a geniune appreciation for this song and i wish to share it with others that have the same type of musical interests as i do.

if you would like to listen to the song, i have a link for ya right here -[link]

layList&

=A4CEFE349C4D5047&index=76

but it is not a very clear version.

lyrics(read these and you will see why i am now a puddle of mush everytime i hear this particular song)

I left apartment 13
yesterday so long ago
i never thought i'd be back here again

i left apartment 13
devils on my breath benighted
brothel light is due in sunday.

welcome to apartment 13
where the razorblades come clean
welcome to my mental hell
let me show you to your cell.

Whoooooooooooooooooooooooooaaaaaaaaaaaa

i left apartment 13
Blood was running down the walls
the faces of my loved ones here and there

welcome to apartment 13
let me introduce the obscene
welcome to my own graveyard
step inside i'll leave you scarred.

"What did you say?" *lots of voices*

welcome to apartment 13
where the razorblades come clean
take a load off,yeah come on inside
between your ribs, my knife will slide.

WELCOME

"welcome"

*spoken word*

I'm sitting here in a daze
in this apartment i can never escape
her body's laying before me
her face is such a mess
i cut her from one stinking hole to the next
just like connect the dots.

Whoooooooooooooooooooaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

"connect the dots"

yeeeeeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhh
yeeeeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhh

welcome to apartment 13
where the razorblades come clean
welcome to my own graveyard
step inside i'll leave you scarred

welcome to apartment 13
where the razorblades come clean
welcome to my little hell
let me show you to your cell

Yeah come on inside
you're always welcome right here
oh come on inside
ohhhhh
right now!

]]> ~bbelill am i alive? http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/16762222/ http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/16762222/ Wed, 06 Feb 2008 21:53:48 PST
1) i recieved an a on my narrative essay, plus my english professor wants me to submit it (or submit something) for the writing contest. she said " you have an amazing talant for captivating the readers attention and showing them exactly what you are describing. i really think you should submit a piece, i think you would have a really good chance at winning." ....always nice to hear that one's work is appreciated somewhere but i doubt i am going to submit anything.

2)i needed to buy a new inhaler and i found out the price for my perscription had been lowered(always nice)

3)i bought a new book for my self, finally completing one of the many collections of stories i have.

4) my order from hottopic came earlier than i expected. which means two new pairs of arm warmers, plus a new pair of tripp pants, and a tripp skirt! and i treated myself to a new poetry/story/sketch book!

5) I WENT TO THE THEATRE AND SAW SWEENY TODD * major orgasm* *several orgasms* omg, it was perfect. they didn't deviate from the original story line at all!so for those of you who do not already know-
tim burton + johnny depp + sweeny todd = MOVIE MAGIC!

i will do poet of the week tomorrow...i thinksong of the day will be- bloodlust and perversion by carpathian forest

here-[link]

]]> ~bbelill i was tagged twice, therefore more answers http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/16731252/ http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/16731252/ Mon, 04 Feb 2008 21:47:31 PST
~Jade-Rowwood
Alrighty!

1. Who's yer favorite boys for gay porn? (peoples chars. any)- ooo tough one, hmm I actually have never watched gay porn, so im just going to say that I think light and l are hot, kikashi and itachi are just yummy, and then in real lifeÂtim curry from rocky horror picture show is a smexy man beast thing.

2. Ever seen the movie Little Nicky?- I too have a constant craving for popeyes chicken

3. Got a dollar I could borrow?-hahahahahahahahahaha, you and your jokes kishataru!

PrinceRoss asked-
1) Will you run away with me?- 0___0 I have no response to this question other than Âr u stalking me?Â

~ ~Drea14

1.) When you hear the phrase "The cheesy, baked potato of doom" what does it remind you of? Where is the sour cream when you need it?! Ahhh well picks up spork im coming for you , you yummy baked goodness. hahaha

2.) How do you think the world will end/humanity will die/whatever? I believe that little nicky will discover his hidden capacity to be evil and embrace it by taking over, he will rule all of us and demand popeye chicken every hour on the hour, eventually we will run out and he will destroy us with the spork of doom.

3.) When will I get that fucking spork?? Im not exactly sureÂit depends on when little nicky has me make it for him(gasp, yes I will make the tool that will bring the destruction to all mankindÂand before you ask, yes I am proud 

and now for the second damn quiz~

The rules are:
1. Post these rules
2. Each person tagged must post 8 random facts about themselves
3. Tags should write a journal/blog of these facts
4. At the end of the post 8 more persons are tagged and named
5. Go to their page and leave a comment telling them they're tagged
~~~~~
I am going to roast

for tagging me again, I swear this solemnly on all that is evil!
Yes I have done this before, but these facts will be different so read!

1.) it so happens that I have acquired three new nicknames.

has decided to dub me sporkyÂo_o you donÂt want to know. Josh has named me lovelypoison, but he doesnÂt use it(he still prefers the first nickname he ever called me) and the third is apparently nini for some strange reason.

called me this in one of our previous conversations and then suddenly today some random friend in class decided he was going to call me that as well.

2.) feet.are.gross. I hate it when someone tries to convince me that feet are sexy. These people are delusional and either need to be shot, or seek professional help(and then be shot)

3.) I hate clingy people, seriously, there is a thing called personal space that in all honesty does not need to be invaded all the damn time! (and people wonder why divorce rates are so high)

4.) grasshoppers are creepy, seriously, have you ever seen one in the summertime down in the south? They eat EVERYTHING!

5.)

and

only want me for my sporks ï

6.) when I was a smoker I could never find a damn lighter(let alone keep the ones I bought), now that I donÂt smoke, I find them all the damn time!

7.) I Always have some random song stuck in my head, seriously, it never shuts off, it is like my own personal radio.

8.)people see me as brave or strong, but I see myself as something that would get me smacked by several people if I said it.
~~~~~

8 PEOPLE TO [TORTURE] (Oh, hell yes, IÂm all for that!) TAG:
ok seems how I didnÂt tag anyone last time I am going to this time.

1)

(e... ]]> ~bbelill heheheheehhe http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/16702897/ http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/16702897/ Sun, 03 Feb 2008 08:15:12 PST

just made a funny! lol. omg.

okay to understand fully, i was commenting about how

made me laugh with some of his silly comments on my work . i believe my exact words were somewhere around " wow ,

is so completly random, I LOVE IT, he is such a silly little creature." to which without missing a freaking beat(which is so unlike her...she can be dense(as she nods and says "its true") she fires back "well, he's a man." Sorry to all of my male watchers and friends, but that was incredibly funny.

but if you are sitting here going that wasn't all that funny i reply, bite me, i thought it was funny, its early, i got an hour of sleep, and i haven't had coffee.

speaking of coffee, i am slowly but surely brainwashing her into speaking (fuckityfuckfuckfuck, i just pinched all five of my fingers between the computer and the chair, both imovable objects with body weight , i should not be allowed to go anywhere near anything until i have had my coffee and i am no longer a danger to myself)

okay back to what i was saying,

came into the living talking about magickal coffee fairies,

, hehehehe this is what happens when you hang out with me, you slowly but surely start speaking kyu-speak. hahahahahaha
but i just wanted to share this amusing tale with you, this isn't my journal for the day, to those of you who asked me questions i didn't forget about you, i am merely waiting for others to ask questions because they didn't sign on yesterday. i will probably answer them later tonight.

]]> ~bbelill New quiz thing, only you guys get to ask the quest http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/16687340/ http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/16687340/ Sat, 02 Feb 2008 08:52:41 PST
No matter how crazy, inappropriate, or random they are.

I will answer 100% truthfully. (or as close to the truth as I can)

Now here's the dare.

You must put this in your journal!

See what other people will ask you.

If you've already had this is your journal, no worries!

swiped from

i am posting this so early that way i can collectively answer your questions in tonights journal, so hurry up and ask away!!!

]]> ~bbelill awesome day http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/16676958/ http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/16676958/ Fri, 01 Feb 2008 15:35:13 PST it really was. it started off with me getting lectured by josh...long freaking story...thankyou so much

anyways i get to school and who just happens to be waiting out side the classroom for me? you guessed it , the friend who has put me on edge the past couple of days. well some things were said, a friend of mine was there with me, and said friend told jackass (that is how i will refer to him) to leave me alone unless i showed an interest in wanting to talk to him. ......lets just say that didn't go over well and jackass fucked up and ended up with a fist lodged in his midsection. it was funny shit dude. i just wish i could have been the one to deliver that fucking sweet blow.

seriously , in the land of magickal sucker punches this one was right up there in its perfectness.

anyways,

yeah, hmm ummm oh yeah, lets see instead of a short story or novel, why don't we change things up a bit. i want you to check out "mending wall" by robert frost, it is *kisses fingertips* a wonderful peice of literature!

hmm song of the day.....well i don't really know much about this group but i did find a song that i liked by them, and maybe you will to, then again maybe not. i came across them by complete accident today trying to find a symbol pic for my msn, and i found this awesome design and the name said it was the symbol for a band. oh before you listen to them, i realise that some of you are a bit young yet for this particular type of music...so i appologise if you do not like it but i can't make everyone happy all the time, and this band makes me

, so of course i had to look them up...

okay here you go... Carpathian Forest - It's Darker Than You Think At Wacke

i did originally find a cleaner version, but i cant find it now. sorry.

here-[link]

lyrics-

My cold goddess of the night
Squirming under my spiked fist
She's giving me all carnal delights
Submit yourself and drink my blood
I am the bringer of hate
Evil reigns supreme on earth
Defenders of the blackest faith
Which strengthen my inner glow
Mind expanding inner journey
From a grim and bitter soul
Misanthropic violent hellblast
It's darker than you think...
For seemingly endless time
There is still blood on the old oak
This is where you come to die
Over three hundred years old
And still stretching towards the sky
The hangman's oak...
Burning, bleeding, dying
From the inside
Hitting, whipping, kicking
Tthe corpse of christ!!!

Reading, learning, seeing
All knowledge of evil
Watching, waiting, observing
My fallen angel...
I am the mortal guide
With spiritual possessions
I have seen the other side
And I have sold my soul!!!
I have no earthly tombstone
And I have no christian grave
I am a misanthrope
I am not a fucking slave!!!

lyrics-

]]> ~bbelill quiz thingy http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/16667810/ http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/16667810/ Fri, 01 Feb 2008 01:32:23 PST

~~~~~
The rules are:
1. Post these rules
2. Each person tagged must post 8 random facts about themselves
3. Tags should write a journal/ blog of these facts
4. At the end of the post 8 more persons are tagged and named
5. Go to their page and leave a comment telling them they're tagged

omg, i can't believe i finally have to do this one, i have been hoping that i would get skipped damnit.

allright lets see , 8 useless random facts about me...hhmmmm

1) i love thunder and lightning storms(especially if i can see a tornado, i know 0___0 im scary right, but there is something really beautifull in the danger of it all)

2)whenever i am in public and i have to sit down(like in a resturaunt) i always choose a spot where my back is against the wall and i can keep my eye on everybody else(some say paranoid, i say fullwarned is fullarmed)

3) i can't stand it when people talk with thier mouth full of food, it is disgusting, especially since it usually doesn't stay in there very well with the mouth open( little hint people, this trait is not cute, endearing, or attractive, grow up and learn some manners)

4) the written word is my Favorite thing (tied with music of course) (and something really strange is that i can remember almost anything i read after only reading it once...like a photographic memory)

5) i am honest, really, most accuse me of being brutally honest.

6) i never wear high heels( i don't even own any) seriously i think the women of the world should figure out how to travel back in time and kill the sadistic bastard that thought those torture chambers for feet up. i swear to you it had to be a man.

7)my eyes are brown, but they are different shades depending on my mood, and when i am seriously pissed off they are black( tis truth, if you don't believe ask

)

8) the saying i believe in with everything i have is " fool me once shame on you, fool me twice shame on me" therefore i normally don't give second chances, i have been walked over to much in my life to trust easily, and once it is betrayed, it is very hard for me to over come the act.

i tag, whoever wants to do this!

]]> ~bbelill suck suck suck http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/16652588/ http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/16652588/ Thu, 31 Jan 2008 00:51:19 PST
they just make me want to take myself and my bubble and hide far away from all possible human contact.

song of the day will be disturbe, i don't care if you like it or not, this song suites my mood right now!

here-[link]

lyrics-

Down With The Sickness"

Can you feel that?
Ah, shit

Drowning deep in my sea of loathing
Broken your servant I kneel
(Will you give in to me?)
It seems what's left of my human side
Is slowly changing in me
(Will you give in to me?)

Looking at my own reflection
When suddenly it changes
Violently it changes (oh no)
There is no turning back now
You've woken up the demon in me

[Chorus:]
Get up, come on get down with the sickness [x3]
Open up your hate, and let it flow into me
Get up, come on get down with the sickness
You mother get up come on get down with the sickness
You fucker get up come on get down with the sickness
Madness is the gift, that has been given to me

I can see inside you, the sickness is rising
Don't try to deny what you feel
(Will you give in to me?)
It seems that all that was good has died
And is decaying in me
(Will you give in to me?)

It seems you're having some trouble
In dealing with these changes
Living with these changes (oh no)
The world is a scary place
Now that you've woken up the demon in me

[Chorus]

(And when I dream) [x4]
No mommy, don't do it again
Don't do it again
I'll be a good boy
I'll be a good boy, I promise
No mommy don't hit me
Why did you have to hit me like that, mommy?
Don't do it, you're hurting me
Why did you have to be such a bitch
Why don't you,
Why don't you just fuck off and die
Why can't you just fuck off and die
Why can't you just leave here and die
Never stick your hand in my face again bitch
FUCK YOU
I don't need this shit
You stupid sadistic abusive fucking whore
How would you like to see how it feels mommy
Here it comes, get ready to die

[Chorus (last line changed to "Madness has now come over me")]

]]> ~bbelill my independence day http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/16625124/ http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/16625124/ Tue, 29 Jan 2008 08:48:46 PST
I remember the first day I met her. It was the summer before my freshmen year of high school (July 4th 1999)I remember that I was forced into going up to her brother-in-lawÂs apartment above his shop to befriend her(she had just moved to copper harbor). I thought to myself ÂI canÂt believe I have to play the part of a fucking welcoming committee for some stupid girl who will probably just annoy the hell out of me (fyi- I was a very angry teenagerÂbut then who isnÂt?) And to top of a already very bad day, I thought that she had confirmed what I already thought about her when I saw her dancing around to a horrifying song called Âmmm-bopÂ by the hanson brothers. Shudder I still cringe whenever I hear that song.

But surprisingly enough we hit it off right away(which is very weird for at this time I hated everyone).
Half way through the day we decided to cement our Âforever friendshipÂ by jumping into lake superior fully clothed(btw- for those of you who do not know, lake superior is never warm. Ever. It always feels like you are swimming in ice. It is even been proven that it very rarely climbs about 10 degrees, even in the middle of summer). Well the shock of the cold water caused me to end up swallowing enormous amounts of that nasty ass lake water, which then triggered a coughing/choking fit, which then led to a really bad asthma attack. I expected her to make fun of me, or at least freak out and become scared, and take off. But she did something that completely took me by surprise. She stayed. And she started talking to me about random stuff in a calming voice so that I could fight off the attack. She never once faltered. And I remember thinking to myself Âso this is what it feels like to have a friendÂ.

From then on we were in separable. In fact my very first ÂhappyÂ memory is the day I met her. And from then on every single happy moment in my teenage years involved her. Looking back I canÂt remember a time where I was truly happy and she wasnÂt there. I love you girl. I mean that. I fully expect to meet up with when we are old and gray and do exactly what we said we would when we made our blood oath to one another when I turned 14. (yes we actually poke each others fingers and held them togetherÂwe were 14 give us a break) do you remember my dear friend? We are supposed to buy the creepiest house we can find(one with a really old iron-picket fence around the yard) and everyday we are supposed to play music as loudly as we can while sitting on the porch in our rocking chairs and throw water balloons at the passersby. ï I am really looking forward to that day! SO GO KICK SOME ASS IN THE AIRFORCE AND THEN BRING YOUR SKINNY BUTT BACK HOME TO ME!

Thankyou andi. I know that you deserve pretty words, and grand gestures but all I have is thankyou. I hope it is enough. Thankyou for being my pal, my best friend, my companion and secret keeper. Thankyou for knowing exactly when I needed you and being there if even I refused to reach out and ask for your help. Thankyou for showing me how to laugh. Thankyou for showing me how to love. Yes I said love. You are the first person I actually loved. With my whole heart. Thankyou for just being you, because whether you believe it or not without your kindness and light, I donÂt know what would have happened to me. Thankyou for showing and then forcing me to have the courage live.

The song of the day is going to be something from our past. Do you remember the homecoming dance we went to? I was really upset because of some shit that was going on, and my boyfriend had just dumped me so we decided to go together. And people were whispering and pointing at me making me want to just go back home. But you went up to the dj and requested my fav song, and then came up to me, bowed and asked for a dance.(I am smirking from ear to ear just remember this) I said Âandi, we canÂt what will people think?Â and you said Âthat we are lovers, let them, it will just prove how ignorant they really are.Â You grabbed my hand and then taught me how to waltz to this song. I canÂt remember a time when I have laughed harder.

So for you is Âeverything I doÂ by- Bryan Adams( I first heard this song while watching one of my all time fav movies, Ârobin hoodÂ ) no lyrics today, just listen.

Here- [link]

]]> ~bbelill i want to bite someone http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/16598603/ http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/16598603/ Sun, 27 Jan 2008 14:26:27 PST

i hate DRAMA, especially the kind that forces me to listen to my fucked up family. grrr i avoid connections for a reason, and today is a perfect example of why i am better off in my bubble where people can't get to me, and i can't hurt them.

*looks up at what was just written* woah, that sounds a bit bitchy doesn't it?

song of the day- Touche by godsmack

[link]

lyrics~

Find a way
A way to be
You're looking down again
Just let it be
And I'd only do for you what you'd do for me
And I only would do for you what you'd do for me

Wastin' time like it was free
Will you ever find where you'll be
And I'd only do for you what you'd do for me
And I only would do for you what you'd do for me
And I only would do for you what you'd do for me yeeeeah
And I only would do for you what you'd do for me

Ohhhh... don't look back just to lean on me
Ohhhh... it's taken the life out of me
It's not like you'd know
You've never been close enough
Closer than you've been to me
It's not what you say
It's just in the way
You push me awaaay

And I only would do for you what you'd do for me yeeeeeah
And I only would do for you what you'd do for me yeeeeeah
And I only would do for you what you'd do for me
And I only would do for you what you'd do for me

]]> ~bbelill *grins wickedly* i sseee you http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/16579002/ http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/16579002/ Sat, 26 Jan 2008 09:46:29 PST

i want to say that im so glad to be back *wipes tear* seriously, i have missed randomly spouting off about useless information!

im full of useless crap! lol but some stuff is worth putting up with my nonesense.

wow...0____0 im trying to remeber what i wanted to talk about.......stupid freaking memory fairy thief....grrrr if i catch her she will have alot of explaining to do, or i will spork her to death......WAIT 0____0 THAT SPARKED A MEMORY.....spork....why would that....o YES! duh *smacks forehead* i am a dumbass. i wanted to talk about

he is fairly new but well worth reading. honestly. i would lie to (for i don't know you so i don't care) (i have no freaking clue why i wrote that

)

anyways

has written two deviations, and both are a bit long , otherwise i would post one in here so that you (my faithfull readers and precious fans and friends) would get a preview. but unfortunetly you will actually have to click on his icon and go to his page to actually view the work. (hehehehe that is right, im making you work for it now....dance my little puppets dance dance...0____0 woah where the fuck did the little creepy guy come from??)

okay i will be serious now(for a few sec at least...i hope....STOP LOOKING AT ME LIKE I AM NUTS......wooo what a pretty jacket, do the sleeves really attach in the back like that)(omg my friend

is creepy...and she scares me...she sleeps with her eyes open0___0 it is like she is staring into my soul....and now she threatening to stab me with forks(to which i reply stab me instead with a spork and i will be your willing slave for all eternity....or at least for a few sec....maybe

it depends on the stabbing ...lol)

OMG FOCUS BRITTNI(yes i really yell at myself)

okay anyways seriously check him out, he is witty and entertaining to read and i promise you will not regret it. ...scouts honor...o wait im a chick so i guess that would be like bluebirds honor or some crap like that ... *shrugs* i don't know what i am talking about anymore

okay lets see book of the day will be (looks at many books while trying to pick one.....this is hard) hmmmm ooo i know "Needful things" by stephen king. actually you know what, just pick up anything by him, for he is wonderful and everyone should read something by him, be it his dark tower series, or the stand, it, or misery(yes it was a book first, not a movie, a book) i promise that there is something in his collection that you should enjoy reading. why are you still sitting here? by my calculations you should either be checking out

or picking up a book! so what are you.....o yeah... *sheepish grin* sorry you are waiting for the song of the day right??? okay yeah sorry my bad........you can beat me later *wink* promise.

allright song of the day ooo i think it will have to be Nirvana- Lithium

[link]

lyrics-

Im so happy cause today
Ive found my friends ...
Theyre in my head
Im so ugly, but thats okay, cause so are you ...
Weve broken our mirrors
Sunday morning is everyday for all I care ...
And Im not scared
Light my candles, in a daze
cause Ive found god
Yeah (x6)

Im so lonely but thats okay, I shaved my head ...
And Im not sad
And just maybe Im to blame for all Ive heard ...
But Im not sure
Im so excited, I cant wait to meet you there ...
But I dont care
Im so h... ]]> ~bbelill glomps all around! http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/16565286/ http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/16565286/ Fri, 25 Jan 2008 11:52:26 PST seriously, just a freaking tastic day!

i bought a new hoody(which brings the total to like agazzilion(i love hoody's) )plus a new guy shirt that is awesome , it is black with somekind of design on the sleeves.

PLUS- I HAVE A NEW KEYBOARD AND MOUSE...THEY ARE WIRELESS ...OOOO PRETTY.

oh and i officially own all 4 saw movies(i don't care if you don't like the 4th keep it to yourself for i have not seen it yet(oh and im pretty sure i will love for i love the other three and i would marry the series if i could) )

ooo yes plus i bought two new books, and i have officially lost count of how many i own now....(will probably count them when i sign off of here)

ooooo and im going to dye my hair tonight! yay! goodbye you ucky ucky blonde(im naturally blonde, and i hate it) hello a dark brown with red and purple streaks...hehehe can't wait, i haven't tried this color combo yet.

ooo and i have a hair appointment for monday so im chopping as well, ...well maybe not chopping it completly...i have not decided yet...what do you think?

oh and i have a new poem that is ready to be posted , but im not sure if im going to , i have to ask a couple of people's opinion before i decide.....so it is up to a few close friends wether or not you get to read it.

sorry, but it is a completly different style than what i normally write. therefore i am a gutless wonder who needs approval from surrounding people before i am brave enough to post it online ....hehehehe, im a paradox! hahahaha

hmmmm what song for the day should i choose today....hehehe, im feeling very...prince today.(now don't get me wrong, im not a big fan of him but i do enjoy his movie(*sheepish grin* i own it) and i do like three songs by him...and those are 1)purple rain(of course) 2) nikki(*blush*) 3) my all time fav, when doves cry)

so here it is , [link]

lyrics~

Dig if u will the picture
Of u and I engaged in a kiss
The sweat of your body covers me
Can u my darling
Can u picture this?

Dream if u can a courtyard
An ocean of violets in bloom
Animals strike curious poses
They feel the heat
The heat between me and u

How can u just leave me standing?
Alone in a world thats so cold? (so cold)
Maybe Im just 2 demanding
Maybe Im just like my father 2 bold
Maybe youre just like my mother
Shes never satisfied (shes never satisfied)
Why do we scream at each other
This is what it sounds like
When doves cry

Touch if u will my stomach
Feel how it trembles inside
Youve got the butterflies all tied up
Dont make me chase u
Even doves have pride

How can u just leave me standing?
Alone in a world so cold? (world so cold)
Maybe Im just 2 demanding
Maybe Im just like my father 2 bold
Maybe youre just like my mother
Shes never satisfied (shes never satisfied)
Why do we scream at each other
This is what it sounds like
When doves cry

How can u just leave me standing?
Alone in a world thats so cold? (a world thats so cold)
Maybe Im just 2 demanding (maybe, maybe Im like my father)
Maybe Im just like my father 2 bold (ya know hes 2 bold)
Maybe youre just like my mother (maybe youre just like my mother)
Shes never satisfied (shes never, never satisfied)
Why do we scream at each other (why do we scream, why)
This is what it sounds like

When doves cry
When doves cry (doves cry, doves cry)
When doves cry (doves cry, doves cry)

Dont cry (dont cry)

When doves cry
When doves cry
When doves cry

When doves cry (doves cry, doves cry, doves cry
Dont cry
Darling dont cry
Dont cry
Dont cry
Dont dont cry

]]> ~bbelill time to kill http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/16551289/ http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/16551289/ Thu, 24 Jan 2008 12:57:10 PST
Brittni Raeanne B.

2. YOUR GANGSTA NAME:

ummmmmm i don't have one really, but some people call me lady steel *blush*

3. YOUR DETECTIVE NAME: (fav. color & fav. animal)

Emerald dragon

4. YOUR STAR WARS NAME: (the first 3 letters of your last name, first 2 letters of your first name & first 3 letters of dad's name)

Belbrchr(0____0 woah, that is fucking creepy)

5. SUPERHERO NAME: (2nd favorite color & favorite drink)

black mocha(

omfg, that is halarious)

6. IRAQI NAME: (2nd letter of your first name, 3rd letter of your last name, any letter of your middle name, 2nd letter of your moms maiden name, 3rd letter of your dads middle name, 1st letter of a siblings first name & last letter of your moms middle name)

Rlaambn(*snickers* wow!)

7. WITNESS PROTECTION NAME: (mothers middle name)

ann(im so not a freaking ann, doesn't suite me at all)

8. GOTH NAME: (black and the name of one your pets)

Black Luther

That was fun, and I tag anyone who feels like telling everyone their funny names!!!

well that was ammusing. hmm anyways, i just thought i would let you know that i am getting the things for my computer tomorrow morning sometime. i hope. i think. maybe....DON"T KILL ME!!! okay anyways, im just sitting here waiting for my project partner to get here...which should be any min sometime soon, hopefully, hmmm anyways i think while i am waiting i will work on a new poem(i have an awesome idea, i just really hope i can write it correctly)(which knowing me, probably means it will suck bigtime...

)

i really hope i get to talk to you guys soon,

i miss ya!

o, and as a special thankyou to dedicating a WONDERFULL song to me in his latest journal, im going to return the kind favor and post one just for him

this one is for you!!!!

[link] go here to listen...it is so pretty

MY AXE-ICP (That is right ladies and gents mmfwcl! raise them hatchets up!)

I Love my faygo, my nyquil pills, shaggy, I love my buddies, my hatchetman, but I love my axe

My axe iz my buddy, I bring him when I walk
me and my axe will leave your head outlined in chalk
My axe is my buddy, he always makes me laugh
me and my axe cut bigot spinal chords in half
My axe is my buddy, and when I wind him back
me and my axe will give your forehead a buttcrack
my axe is my buddy, I never leave without him
me and my axe will leave your neck a bloody fountain

[CHORUS 2x:]
everybody everybody everybody run
murdering murdering murdering fun
swing swing swing
chop chop chop
swing swing swing
chop chop chop

My axe is my buddy, we right the planet's wrongs
me and my axe leave bigots dead on richie lawns
My axe is my buddy, he never make me cry
me and my axe will leave a divot for your eye

[TYLENOL INTERLUDE]

My axe is my buddy, don't take him for a chump
me and my axe will leave you hoppin' on a stump

[CHORUS 2x:]

interlude: look into the deadest tree, tell me baby wut you see
don't you hear the branches cry, asking for the reasons why
did they hang so many men, from the branches off of them
why did humans make them play, with them in their evil way
look into the moon's beam, can't you fathom what it's seen
bodies dragging from a truck, driven by a bigot fuck
why you think the heavens cry, acid rain and blizzard skys
aint no covering the tracks, that's why I'm here and oh yes

My axe is my buddy, he'll thump into your head
me and my axe will make your white T-shirt all red
My axe is my buddy, you let that dixie wave
me and my axe will fuck your mother on your grave

[TYLENOL INTERLUDE]

My axe is my buddy, we both cry with the trees
me and my axe will bring the devil to his knees

[CHORUS 4X]

]]> ~bbelill yikes 15 min http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/16519319/ http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/16519319/ Tue, 22 Jan 2008 10:52:40 PST
1) thankyou for all the comments (you make me feel special)

2) sorry about the faving and running (as in faving a work and not commenting) but i really honestly don't have the time, if i faved it , i love it, otherwise i wouldn't want to put it on my page permanetly.

3) check out my new poem, and tell me what you think)

4) chapter 4 will be up soon( a few minor adjustments and it will be ready)

5) the parts im going to need for my personal computer is going to run me at about 40 dollars, so i should be able to purchase it soon, im just not sure how soon.

6) I MISS ALL OF YOU SO MUCH!!!!

SERIOUSLY.

7) btw , the internet is a wonderful thing, thanks to email i have ensured that a certain individual will not be getting parole or probation for the next 4-6 years...

do a happy dance with me!!! hahahahaa....

8) since i am sure you are annoyed by me and my ugliness by now i will let you go until tomorrow.

LOVE YA ALL!!!!

]]> ~bbelill do i really strike you as religious? http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/16498195/ http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/16498195/ Sun, 20 Jan 2008 22:55:04 PST

okay i have to return the tools i borrowed from my professor tomorrow, so i might not be on here tomorrow night, sorry, but like i said before, email me or message me on here, i will check it out at the college and get back to you, and i should be buying what i need for the computer sometime this week.

now for those of you who are scratching your heads still not understanding why i have the celtic crosses on my hands, i will tell you what they mean, please keep in mind that this is what it means to me. not how you may see it.

for me getting the crosses on my hands symbolizes how instead of turning to religion when life was "difficult" for help, i took my life into my own hands and toughed it out, got myself out of bad situations , and found the strength to move on.

okay that is enough for one night, check out my latest poem...or not...it is really up to you i guess.

]]> ~bbelill ooo and now i know the movie http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/16470720/ http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/16470720/ Sat, 19 Jan 2008 07:17:07 PST
]]> ~bbelill im going to jail http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/16466909/ http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/16466909/ Fri, 18 Jan 2008 21:56:11 PST

R U READY???? JOHNNY DEPP IS FILMING HIS NEWEST MOVIE LESS THAN AN HOUR AWAY FROM ME IN ASHLAND WI! *passes out* *comes to* omg! i know you are probably going "wtf does this have to do with you going to jail?" don't you see???? i am in serious trouble of becoming a Johnny depp stalker, i have been in love with this man since "jump 21 street" AND i have seen every movie he has ever appeared in! omg *passes out again*

yay! *cartwheel* *backflip* *falls on face cuz i can't do a backflip* ooo ouch, yay i don't care ,.... johnny depp is coming here,.... omg *squeals* yayayayayayayyayayay
hahahahahahhahahhahahahhahhahhahahhahhaha

oh and so i am perfectly clear on this.....believe it or not but i am not like the actual masses, i love him for his ability to play such a wide range of different characters, i love him for his mind(body wise he is cute but i like my men to make me feel protected, not like i have to protect them )

i can't even concentrate that is how happy i am! it is so awesome

im so excited, im hoping they will need extras for the movie, i wouldn't want to do it but i know my friends would try so i could go with them under the excuse of wanting to support them and i might be able to see him(i know it won't happen...but a girl can dream) god! i think that this is just about as close to perfect as a day could get. what would make it even better would be if certain friends would sign on already. but o well , can't have everything i guess...ahahahahahahha johnny depp.!!!!!

and to make a great day even better , i bought FOUR NEW BOOKS!!!!

yayayayay

]]> ~bbelill poet of the week http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/16452944/ http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/16452944/ Fri, 18 Jan 2008 00:43:45 PST

this person is truely amazing at writing original peices. there is really nothing i can say about his work that would do it real justice in my eyes.

Hollow Bastion~

Halls, filled with endless souls,
Desecrated by the scent of rotting ghouls,
As the restless souls disseminate,
A cry to eliminate,

The hollow bastion.

Where layers of blood flow,
With the pigments of bodies glow,
Below the floors of this haunted hall,
Where may would dare call,

The hollow bastion

As wails become longer,
And agonies stronger.

Halls, filled with eternal scars,
Hiding beneath evening stars,
As the stories of the dead linger,
Where the blood grows thicker,

The hollow bastion.

As the bodies start to decay,
Where cries for help never delay,
Beneath the sky of a twilight night,
Never hinting a fragment of life,
The hollow bastion.

im serious, check him out, you will not regret it.

now song of the day is one that im truely in love with, it is very weird because i normally don't listen to this particular individual, but i do like his version (which was the original version, but the rater's told them to change because it was to dark for the children to be witnessing.) in my personal opinion they should have kept this version.

okay without further adieu...."this is halloween" by marilynn manson. you should already know the words so im just going to put a link up for this version. check it out, seriously it is HOT!

HERE-[link]

]]> ~bbelill hope on the horizon http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/16445267/ http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/16445267/ Thu, 17 Jan 2008 12:51:30 PST
my computer professor rules, we think that i am right on what is wrong with my computer so he is going to let me borrow the things i need to make it work again for the weekend, that way i don't spend money before i know if that is the problem, so if it works i will be online tonight and all this weekend. *crosses fingers* im really hoping this is the problem, you guy should wish me luck!!!!!!

that is for everyone! I MISS YOU GUYS! *GROUP GLOMP*!!!!! LOL sorry guys im in a really hyper mood, im drinking a jolt for energy! zing! lol, and i am in a really good mood. for the most part i love my classes. my enlish professor and i hit it off really well and to start off the semester we get to read the works from one of my all-time faveriote writers ....im not telling you who it is, but i will give you the name of three works from him and you see if you can figure it out! 1) The hanging. 2)Shooting the elephante 3)1984,

good luck!

okay im signing off for now, but i hope to talk to each and every one of you very soon!

]]> ~bbelill sorry guys http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/16430095/ http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/16430095/ Wed, 16 Jan 2008 10:40:03 PST

]]> ~bbelill quiz thingy http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/16409882/ http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/16409882/ Mon, 14 Jan 2008 21:02:53 PST 10:49

2.What's your full name?

that would be none of your buisness

3.What are you most afraid of?

alson none of your buisness

4.What was the last movie that you saw in a theater?

harry potter(the 5th movie)

5.Place of birth?

houghton, michigan

6.Favorite food?

whatever i am eating at the moment

7.What's your natural hair color?

Blonde(unfreakingfortunetly... i dye it red though)

8.Ever been to Alaska?

not yet, but i will one day

9.Ever been toilet paper rolling?

heheheheheheehehhe many times

10.Love someone so much it made you cry?

yes

11.Been in a car accident?

several

12.Croutons or bacon bits

bacon bits

13.Favorite day of the week?

whatever day i get to sleep

14.Favorite restaurant?

hmmm don't really have one( i do enjoy a good steakhouse though)

15.Favorite Flower?

toss up between carnations/daises/and sunflowers

16.Favorite sport to watch?

that would be hockey

17.Favorite drink?

that would be a budweiser(but i only have on every two months or so)

18.Favorite ice cream?

mint chocolate chip

19.Disney or Warner Brothers?

warner brothers(no contest)

20.Ever been on a ship?

yes several times

21.What color is your bedroom carpet?

creame

22.How many times did you fail your driver's test?

none

23.Who did you get your last e-mail from?

24.What do you do when you are bored?

Listen to music, write, read

25.Bedtime?

whenever i pass out

26.Favorite TV show?

hmm curently that would either be bloodties/women's murder club/csi

27.Last person you went to dinner with?

karen

28.Who do you think will be President?

whoever gives the most blowjobs

29.What are your favorite colors?

a really deep green and black

30.How many tattoos do you have?

two with plans for more(at least 5)

31.How many pets do you have?

mmmm what kind of pets are we talking about?

32.Which came first, the chicken or the egg?

hmmm niether

33.What do you want to do before you die

visit scotland buy a peice of land there and spend the rest of my days in peace

34.Have you ever been to Hawaii

yes, hellish experience, too many people

35.Have you been to countries outside the U.S.

hmmm yes, germany and the united kingdom

36.Time this survey ended

10:59

I tag anyone who wants to do this!!!!

]]> ~bbelill What you get when KYU is not awake yet! http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/16398935/ http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/16398935/ Mon, 14 Jan 2008 07:26:44 PST (KEYS STOP FUCKING MOVING

) woah talk about hunt and peck! (i can't do this, i need a secretary, can't type for shit!)COFFEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! NEEED COOOFFFFEEEE!

anyways back to my story, me and

(who just made fun of me cuz i can spell n-a-s-a-g-a-w-a but i can't spell s-e-c-r-a-t-a-r-y-(whoo hoo spelt it!) ) talking about how it sucked that i couldn't start classes today(which right now im thinking might be a good thing, because i don't have coffee therefore i am crazy)when i just randomly started giggling(don't know if that is spelt right to sleepy to give a flipflyingfuck) and then she laughed at me which made me laugh harder and for some weird reason i said that i would be giggling like a school girl all day to which i recieved the smartass reply of "you are a schoolgirl", which made me laugh so hard i fell out of my freaking camping chair(for i hate the actual computer chair...grrr) and onto the floor where i literally was rolling on the floor laughing uncontrollably(probably spelt that wrong...heheheheehehe)

and just reading the randomness of this entry is making me giggle all over again.(i swear im not normally like this, i never giggle...ever0___0 i laugh, i chuckle, i smirk...i don't giggle this is how tired i really am!)

woah and then just now, chi found a show called hot guys who cook, and i asked her if it said naked after it and she said no and i shook my head sadly for it would have been funny to watch their reactions when they got hit by the grease!

]]> ~bbelill READ ME http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/16395452/ http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/16395452/ Sun, 13 Jan 2008 21:57:34 PST
i know im not a "fun" writer to watch. i have been recieving personal notes since i arrived asking me to either change my style or stop writing because it wasn't appropriate. but i can't do that. i can only write what i feel, and i can't help how i feel. i started this account so that i would have an outlet for all this turmoil inside of me. its helped me to keep on the right track in my life instead of regressing to the way i used to be. by writing every feeling down instead of bottling it all up , i am learning to deal with it. i guess you could say this is my own personal form of therapy. and i want to appologise if i am depressing anyone when they read my work. i don't mean to. i honestly thought that i wouldn't be watched at all. but i can't stop writing either, so if you want to stop watching me i understand. and i won't be insulted. but im not going to stop writing just to please others. especially since it is helping me.

i just hope that at least some of you will stick with me. i feel as if i have made some real friends on here and i really hope we continue to be friends. Plus not everything i write is depressing(or at least i didn't think it was) and i am trying some new poems that i think you will enjoy immensly(one of them i think is going to be erotic...*blush*....something i have been playing with) so please bare with me a little longer. as i have said this time of the year is the worst for me, im lucky if i get 2 hours of solid sleep, and i have flashbacks throughout the day that i can't control. and then of course there are the nightmares. which leads to the poems, which then allows me to breathe again

]]> ~bbelill pfffffffffttttttt http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/16374311/ http://bbelill.deviantart.com/journal/16374311/ Sat, 12 Jan 2008 15:08:50 PST [link]

I can't stand to let you win.
I'm just watching you.
And I don't know what to do.
Feeling like a fool inside.
Feeling all the hurt you hide.
Thought you were my friend.
Seems it never ends.
I need somebody someone.
Can't somebody help me.
All I need is to be.
Loved just for me.

Giving you this and that.
Giving gave nothing back.
It's all related to.
All the things I do.
Feeling like a fool inside.
Seeing all the things you tried.
I am nothing.

I look I sign.
I need someone.
Inside to help me out.
With what I'm trying.
I'm crying, I'm frying.
In a pile of shit.
I'm dying.
I'm dying.
I'm dying

I need somebody (someone).
Somebody (somebody).
Someone.

I need somebody (someone).
Somebody (somebody).
Someone.

Someone.

]]> ~bbelill