http://search.deviantart.com/?q=by:caffiend&section=today deviantART RSS for by:caffiend en-us Copyright 2009, deviantART.com Mon, 21 Dec 2009 23:39:41 PST deviantART.com http://blogs.law.harvard.edu/tech/rss http://s.deviantart.com/minish/widgets/apple-touch-icon-precomposed.png http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/24175150/ http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/24175150/ Sat, 11 Apr 2009 01:13:45 PDT
I feel as if I'm here for a reason but that reason isn't that profound.

Picture these events leading up to a familiar scene from a movie:

A man wakes up to a buzzing alarm clock. He turns over to wake his wife who's already gotten out of bed and is sitting downstairs watching talk shows. He gets up, shaves, brushes his teeth and gets ready to work all the while making no conversation with his wife drawn into the tube. He puts on his work clothes and heads out the door stopping for a moment to say, "off to work honey, I love you." She doesn't look back and replies, "don't forget to bring the trash cans in from the tree lawn when you come home." Sad and discontent he heads out to work, gets to his job as a merchant. He starts loading produce onto the shelves of his cart. He makes sure they're all neat and presentable. The cart wheels perfectly rolling with no resistance and the sign drawn in a professional yet cartoony style. He wipes the sleep from his eyes as he opens the doors of work and walks to his designated selling point at the corner of 5th and Main. He's on his way there, crossing a street when suddenly a man in a sports car, tailed by a cop, tears ass over a hill and, speeding, plows right through the man's cart throwing produce everywhere.

How much of that scene did you witness in the movies? That last bit right? Rewind it a little bit, and then pause it as the man reacts to the cart. That's me.

That's what I feel like sometimes. Like I'm trapped in this role. This pergatory of mediocrity unable to become more or less than what I am because somewhere along the line there's going to be an important scene in someone elses life where there will be the need for a walk-on extra who's down on his luck to make an example out of.

I've never felt like I had a place on this planet. I go through friends like a kid with a packet of sparklers, burning them out as soon as I get my hands on them. People who grew old too quick telling me I've never grown up. Sitting, watching everyone I know become parts of families while I sit here waiting for my cue.

It's pretty frustrating. I always knew that something special was going to happen to me but I just now got the realization that it probably won't be a good special. Maybe I'll be the patient that dies who teaches a doctor to care about details. Or the person the cops didn't listen too who winds up dead. The shot hostage used to prove he's serious. It's like the main character of American Jesus: Chosen said, "When you find out your part of this major plan you automatically assume that you're the lead role but no one ever stops and think that maybe they're just a bit part until it's too late."

I don't even know why I'm trying this really. The chance of this blog making a relevant change in my life is slim to none. Like crying for help in space I guess because honestly, I know I'm stuck at this exact point. I have too many things tethering me to this exact point. I can't move. I literally can't move. I'm shackled to the here and now unable to look at the past and incapable of dragging myself into the future.

Damnit, why can't I get Take the Long Way Home out of my head?

]]> ~caffiend http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/21185851/ http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/21185851/ Mon, 27 Oct 2008 12:18:35 PDT
I really need to start creating more. I just have no inspiration anymore and as the idea of turning pop culture into physical mediums such as wood burns and oil painting etc picks up I'm starting to notice that most of the artists in my field or ridiculously egotistical pricks fighting for lime light as all they have to do is tell a game magazine or website they're the first and the publisher will believe them as they're not interested in researching. The fact that most of my fellow pop-artists in the game field are pricks it not only greatly discourages me to create anything but it also automatically stamps me with the same label.

I mean, look at the guy I mentioned in the last journal. He was so mad that another artist (I really nice artist for once) had gotten attention in Penny Arcade he was going around telling people he "created him" and that he was the first to ever do video game paintings based off pixel art.

I don't know, I really need to find my muse. Now that I'm actually working with video games and getting paid for it my love for them is coming back but it comes at a price too. Now I have unlimited access to free video games which means I'm constantly playing them to get familiar with them so...boom...there goes the free time.

I don't know. Worst part, THE worst part. I have someone who offered me money for two woodburns and I still can't get inspired enough to make them. Gotta focus. I need someone to come over here and stand over me and force me to work on them or something. I'm starting to feel like the main character in I Feel Sick. Bleh.

Anyways that's it for now.

Oh, and I Feel Sick can be read here:
[link]
I don't normally like reading them online but as you'll likely never see this awesome book on the shelves again this is one of the best ways to see it.

]]> ~caffiend http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/20814579/ http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/20814579/ Fri, 03 Oct 2008 19:23:37 PDT
Anyways, I'm a gamer, everyone that knows me knows that. I'm so much of one I have Pac-Man maze wrapped around my left arm. And as part of the gamer cliche I have to make multiple stops a week at the webcomic Penny Arcade. They mentioned this amazing artist named *gfball84887 who does paintings in a pixel art style that look amazing. What I didn't know is that befriending him will get me a message from a one mister 8-bit-Painter. Now, before I go on, remember, if it's not linked DON'T GO THERE as the extra pageviews will do the opposite of what this journal is here to do.

Anyways, within minutes of me watching *gfball84887 I got a message from "the other guy" (as I will now continue to call him) telling me that if I liked *gfball84887 I would love his work. Me, being one of those people who automatically sense danger I went back to *gfball84887's site and started going through his recent watch list. I found that on almost every person's page "the other guy" was there with the same non-personal, cut and paste cookie cutter invite much like a pedophile attempting to lure kids into his van with one lolly. See, a lot of people say that there are a lot of fish in the sea, and while the fish theme works well with relationships, it simply applies well to humans as a whole. There are different types of humans just like there are different types of fish. And sometimes humans can be very similiar to a lamprey. Now, if you don't know what a lamprey is, a lamprey (sp?) is a little fish. How it survives is by attaching itself to an apex predator such as a shark and tries desperately to rake in some of the predator's kill. This is the case here.

My note's back and forth took a terrible turn when he did something that, for most people wouldn't be bad but...for him it was something amazingly terrible. He responded.

Let's read the note shall we?

----------------------
"lol. you really have no idea man. uh yeah see, there wouldnt be a gfball without me. he saw my stuff, thought it was amazing and wanted to try his hand at it and i helped him through the process in the beginning. i was the first person to start doing this. ive been in nintendo power among other magazines and been interviews on various websites. for every 1 person that might be like "oh lame, spam!" there are 10 people that are "oh shit, this is great!"

when he asked how to get as many fans as me, i told him to go through all 3800 of my "friends" on myspace and friend every one of them. because that how i got fans in the beginning. i went through and let people know i was out there. its called do it yourself promotion."
-----------------------

Let's note several key phrases here shall we? :
"wouldt be a gfball without me"
"saw my stuff, thought it was amazing"
"i was the first person to start doing this"
"'oh shit, this is great'"
"get as many fans as me"

Picture him, older, much older, sitting in a room in an asylum talking to an interviewer. You know who he'd look like? Fucking Antonio Salieri from the movie Amadeus. Remember? If you've never seen the movie it's all about Mozart but told through the narration of an insane Antonio Salieri who, while claiming he was the superior artist got so jealous of Mozart's fame he inadvertantly killed him.

Not only that but I'm also particularly bothered when he states he's the first person to do painting's like his. He wants to reference Nintendo Power? I'll reference it as well. Nintendo Power has had a feature as long as I can remember. The feature is fan art. You send in paintings, drawings, whatever of video game characters. This idea of pop culture applied to canvas did not start with you. And if you're talking about people who are actually trying to do it as an art form with the intent of maybe getting recognized in a gallery form? Well, as the "first of your kind" where have you been? I've gone through every piece displayed at the last three I Am 8-Bit video game art shows in Hollywood and I just can't find anything of yours. You'd think that if someone was the first of their kind and recognized in many different sources they'd be tripping over themselves to portray your art in the creme de... ]]> ~caffiend http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/20709340/ http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/20709340/ Sat, 27 Sep 2008 17:03:25 PDT
]]> ~caffiend http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/20662570/ http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/20662570/ Thu, 25 Sep 2008 03:54:37 PDT
]]> ~caffiend http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/19616931/ http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/19616931/ Sun, 27 Jul 2008 02:22:43 PDT
I was sitting at home with my roommate enjoying a fantastic movie when my friend called. My friend asked me to go up to my work on my day off and hang out with him. After much pleading I agreed as I thought going out for a bit would be nice. I got there, sat with my friends and you turned around and ruined things.

First you thought it would be funny to tell me my full name. You made sure I know you knew me and then you made sure I knew that I did not know you at all. You also told me that because I worked there you figured if you came around enough you were bound to find me. Then you told me you'd tell me more later.

I was creeped but tried to go back to my conversation. From there you randomly turned around and started telling me about my former jobs, my cats, the amount of bedrooms in my home, even my hobbies. You made SURE I knew you knew everything about me. You were enjoying the hell out of it. Then, as if you hadn't crossed a line you looked me in the eyes and brought up my parents divorce. I pivotal moment in the making of who I am and you looked me in the eyes and played that card like it was nothing. I got pissed and walked away leaving you to the cold glances of my table.

Later I bit my tongue and came back, my very good friend Jessie decided to come over and talk to us. You know her, she was your server. You figured out that me and her were friends, ran up a tab and than stiffed her with it as one final fuck you to me.

One of the things you told me though was that you know my DeviantArt page. So I'm sure you'll see this. I want you to understand something. You told me the moniker you used on my old MySpace chat, that rang a bell. You told me that you figured if you ducked in my work enough you'd find me, that tells me you live near by. And two people at my table were creeped out by how familiar you look. I want you to know something "Erica," (not to sound cliche but) if that's your real name. I'm going to find out who you are. I'm going to find out all about you. And when I know all that I'm going to find you. When I find you I will get the money from you that you stiffed my friend because I want you to understand something. If you know me as well as you say you do, you'll know I've been teased and picked on and essentially fucked with my whole life. And like any other type of pain you get used to it over time and I'm used to it to the point where it rarely bothers me anymore. But the SECOND you fuck with one of my friends for the sole purpose of fucking with me? That's it. I want you to know I will find you. I will get the money from you. And as stupid as you thought you'd make me feel by fucking with me? It's nothing compared to how dumb you're going to fucking feel.

Signed,
Well, you already know.

]]> ~caffiend http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/15536757/ http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/15536757/ Fri, 16 Nov 2007 16:51:46 PST
]]> ~caffiend http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/15522039/ http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/15522039/ Thu, 15 Nov 2007 15:05:35 PST
]]> ~caffiend http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/15320658/ http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/15320658/ Thu, 01 Nov 2007 17:38:02 PDT
1) You have braces. Sure, there's a lot of people with braces that are adults, but it's really rare and they sure hide them alot.

2) You don't have a single picture of yourself where you didn't take it yourself. Arms length shot = you're fucking 12.

3) You take pictures with your friends and you all make that stupid pucker face. Trust me, you don't need to make your mouth in that shape for us to know you're an asshole.

4) You have pictures of yourself proudly holding up alcohol. Here's a simple example of age with alcohol and what that equals. Beer to someone >21 = depressing if they're still proud of it. Beer to someone < 21 = I'm so proud I have this because I'm to fucking young to have it legally.

5) You enjoy Kayne West. Nuff said.

6) You list two shows from the CB as your favorites.

7) You don't know who Judge Hatchett is. Hmmm, wonder where you might be when that fucking show's on.

8) You keep using your photo gallery like it's MySpace and than get pissed when they get moved or REmoved without understanding why.

9) You use the fucking term BFF.

I'd go higher but I don't think they're taught double digits yet in your age. Now leave me alone whoever you are that I can't name.

]]> ~caffiend http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/15240080/ http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/15240080/ Sat, 27 Oct 2007 08:01:59 PDT
]]> ~caffiend http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/14837875/ http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/14837875/ Sat, 29 Sep 2007 08:02:12 PDT
Don't get me wrong, if you read my LONG rant on my MySpace about how proud I am about being a gamer you know that...well, I'm really proud to be a gamer, but at the same time it's really tough because a vast majority of gamers wouldn't be happy with a game unless it looked better than real and blew them as they played. Than the other half of the bad gamers that actually LIKE games can also be some of the biggest dicks I've ever seen. I posted a question that asked, "Is it true that Master Chief's real name is John?" Within minutes the forum had hit almost 3 pages of people belittling me because of it. Acting like I asked, "Is it true God's son's name is Jesus?" People were actually offended I didn't know that. They called me an idiot for not reading the series of Halo novels. They just threw all sorts of hate at me, which, when I started throwing them back escalated the forum to 7 pages. Haha, I'm good. But still, a lot of gamers I think, actually prevent others from being gamers. This is why the government and idiots like Jack Thompson have awful opinion of gamers because if you look online for them they will come at you angrier than a Klan member in Compton and it's terrible.

Gaming is one of the most effective ways of bonding with complete strangers since the first college kegger. People from all over the world come to one place and since you all own the game you already have something in common, *Boom*, ice broken right off the bat. But what do we do with this? We use it to make ourselves look like fucking assholes. We alienate people who don't know every inch and detail. I hear a lot of gamers complain that they just can't get their girlfriends into gaming. Fuck, ever wonder why? It's not always because they're not good at a particular game. I have plenty of female gamer friends that say that only because they say their boyfriends or just male friends act like a dick when they're winning and a prick when they're not. So...yeah, reap what you sew.

I dunno, it just disappoints me. Within the first month, the Halo site registered over one billion kills on Halo 3. One billion. Take that time you got hit with a rocket. Multiply that by a billion. 1,000,000,000. Look at that fucking number. And that's just one Halo 3. Imagine, with the amount of gamers unified like that, imagine the positive example we could make if we just tried to be fucking civil. (Sure, saying fucking every other line kind makes me hypocritcal but, it's a rant, I'm allowed) That's why I respect Penny Arcade and other gaming communities for their working on Child's Play. Not the movie but the charity. It's basically a charity where the gaming community donates money and other items to help participating hospitals give toys, books, video games an... ]]> ~caffiend http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/14752621/ http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/14752621/ Sun, 23 Sep 2007 05:17:02 PDT
Also, I watched a Japanese trailer for Kingdom Hearts 3. Holy shit! How old are they going to make these characters! What was Sora? 24? And plus it just looks hardcore. I mean, deadly hardcore. I mean, the army being slaughtered by a cloud of thousands of Keyblades that weird villiany guy was controlling? How creepy it looked when Sora was frozen to near death. And who the hell is the girl fighting along side him? I just, I dunno, this game looks so hardcore I don't see how Donald and Goofy would even work. Wow. Now let's hope they FINALLY get good summons cause God knows they were worthless in the last two games with the exception of Genie.

]]> ~caffiend http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/14560465/ http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/14560465/ Sun, 09 Sep 2007 11:55:23 PDT DragonForce Stops Alien Invasion....Again

In our first story, power/speed metal band DragonForce has once again saved us from aliens. People in Nevada were rudly awakened last Saturday at 2AM by large tube like ships hovering in the skies over head gathering to invade. As we have no real way to combat this all seems lost, that was, until, once again ZP Theart of DragonForce decided enough was enough. Gathering the band together they rocked out a power ballad so fast and heavy that ethereal lighting shot forth from their guitars destroying the ships. The only damage our side took was when drummer Dave Mackintosh's final high hat slam took out a large mountain in the background with surprised one area man. "I didn't even notice there was a mountain," said Steven Karnacy. "The whole time they were fighting the aliens there was no mountain around, but suddenly...well...one just blew up. Don't know how, but...it was pretty metal." The 54 year old man than threw up the metal sign and slid away only to power slide into his home. We sat down with an interview with Vadim Pruzhanov.

BSNews: So how long has DragonForce been combating aliens?
Vadim: For about a decade, it's been an interesting run.
BS: I can only imagine. How did it all start? Is there some feud we don't know about?
Vadim: Actually it's not that interesting of a story. We kept getting faster and faster and one day Herman (guitarist) notest if he hit a certain speed he could summon forth ethereal lightning. It was pretty insane!
BS: It must have been.
Vadim: Anyways, aliens tried to invade and, you know, we had lightning. So...we helped. Turns out we were a lot more affective than we thought so...you know, it just kind of became a hobby.
BS: Haha, fantastic. One more question. It says here you play the keytair? Is that true?
Vadim: *sobs into his hands*


Pheonix Wright: Attorney No Longer?

Famed Capcom Attorney Pheonix Wright may have to give up his profession after his last case. A North Carolina stripper accussed three Lacrosse players who hired her for a party of raping her. With a solid case under his belt Pheonix went on to defend the woman with solid evidence and good arguements. But after a brief recess things went sour. "I don't know what happened!" Claimed Pheonix. "The defendant barely had his mouth open and I just started jumping to my feet and yelling, 'Objection!'" In a bazarre turn of events Pheonix, who claims mental problems, started screams objection after every point the defendant made until he blacked out. "Honestly, it was like someone else was controlling me. A voice just telling me to press every point and suddenly, as if some weird energy guage depleted, I blacked out and woke up an hour earlier." To everyone else though, they got to witness Phoenix dragged out of court postponing the case for another day or so. Defendant attorney Miles Edgeworth was quoting as saying, "it was pathetic. All I could do was stand there and shake my head back and forth."

Bush to Send Soldiers to Sinnoh

"That's the last straw," Bush explained while displaying his newest plan to send drops into the Sinnoh region. Recent search teams have found that the entire town of Sinnoh, along wth other neighboring foriegn islands, are taking part in a brutal ritual, scaring native wild life. This ritual, which bares much similiarities to the cock fight is called a Pokebattle. Basically, what happens is that the young of the region are giving 6 ceremonial cages and are told to venture out on their own, usually by their single parent and capture one animal in each in an effort to, "catch them all." The wild life in the island area is remarkably diverse in the fact that not only are all animals different from anywhere else on Earth, but also in their striking uniqueness from each other. The can range from 3 foot tall butterflies to four legged blue dog like creatures towering over 30 feet tall that can, as reports show, "roar though time." Upon catching these animals and putting them in cages, the children are incouraged to find other children with their own collection and engage in a "Pokebattle". From their the "trainers" force their animals into gruesome combat with the other trainers animals. Once one side loses all six, through reasons we weren't told, the losing traing was knocked out and his body, stranger even, was dragged to the lobby of a vet clinic. Bush's original plan for peace turned sour when Bush visited Kanto and demanded to speak to the ambassador only to be introduced to a professor. "I don't think he understands the way of our people," stated Professor Oak, a professor currently located in the Johto region of Kanto. "Our people are simple. We rarely do more than sleep and collect Pokeman (their word for animals). With few schoo... ]]> ~caffiend http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/14559085/ http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/14559085/ Sun, 09 Sep 2007 10:26:09 PDT
If you start going to people's pages and just favorite random shit, you're a spammer.

If you type in something that interests you and favorite every fucking thing that appears, you're a spammer.

If you send me a comment on my page telling me to either:
Check out your page
Just dropping in
Hi! You've been (whatever stupid shit you're doing)
You're spamming. And you're doing it in the worst way because not only do I see this shit, but my FRIENDS, people I actually give a shit about, see it when they come to my page and, curious, they go to your page. You're exploiting my fucking friends and I will hang you by your own entrails if you do that.

The other two types, not AS bad, but favoriting work you don't give a shit about is insulting. It degrades the piece. It's like your parents looking at a drawing you made as a little kid and saying, "wow this is good," but not putting it on the fridge. Fuck you for that. You won't be hung by your entrails like the other spammer, but I'm sure I can still find something that makes a noose.

My first message about this is located here: [link]

Oh, and I apologize for the hostility but spamming stands against a lot of what DA USED to stand for and I like to think of myself as part of the old guard.

]]> ~caffiend http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/14408142/ http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/14408142/ Thu, 30 Aug 2007 09:53:03 PDT
I HATE SPAMMERS

OK, that feels better. For those of you who don't understand what, to me, makes one a spammer allow me to define it.

To me a spammer is, I guess, what some would call an attention whore. See, a spammer's normal definition is someone who uses a public forum to mass market something. Normally that something is something no one wants to begin with.

The spammers I'm talking about on DA do a very similiar thing. First they go to random DA Users pages and than they do one of the following:

1) They will randomly favorite something of yours without really caring as to what. You'll notice that an item will be favoritized by someone you've never seen without so much as a comment. This way, they think, you'll look at it and go, "well this person favorited on this, they must have taken an interest to go this deep into my gallery." Than you go to their page and look at their comments only to see a long list of...

"Thanks for the fav"
"Thx for the fav yo!"
"Glad you liked (blank), thanks for faving."

And other such stuff. Awesome telltale sign of a spammer.

2) The next kind is the one that leaves random comments on your main page. You'll see someone you've never seen before saying, "just saying what's up." Or, in the case of what happened to me VERY recently the person will actually point out that they are just commenting on random pages. This one's REALLY annoying because not only are they trying to trick you into giving them a pageview BUT they are also using your site as a billboard (I hide my spam by the way before you start looking for it).


There's a couple other methods too which I'm sure you've all seen. But I hate it. If you're someone who's going to spam my page I will say this now, even if you beg an apology out of me and I tell you I'm sorry, it's a fucking lie. Seriously. I will go to your page, I will hate on you and I will be cruel, mean and more importantly...honest. You've been warned.

]]> ~caffiend http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/14281243/ http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/14281243/ Wed, 22 Aug 2007 00:56:43 PDT
I HATE SPAMMERS

OK, that feels better. For those of you who don't understand what, to me, makes one a spammer allow me to define it.

To me a spammer is, I guess, what some would call an attention whore. See, a spammer's normal definition is someone who uses a public forum to mass market something. Normally that something is something no one wants to begin with.

The spammers I'm talking about on DA do a very similiar thing. First they go to random DA Users pages and than they do one of the following:

1) They will randomly favorite something of yours without really caring as to what. You'll notice that an item will be favoritized by someone you've never seen without so much as a comment. This way, they think, you'll look at it and go, "well this person favorited on this, they must have taken an interest to go this deep into my gallery." Than you go to their page and look at their comments only to see a long list of...

"Thanks for the fav"
"Thx for the fav yo!"
"Glad you liked (blank), thanks for faving."

And other such stuff. Awesome telltale sign of a spammer.

2) The next kind is the one that leaves random comments on your main page. You'll see someone you've never seen before saying, "just saying what's up." Or, in the case of what happened to me VERY recently the person will actually point out that they are just commenting on random pages. This one's REALLY annoying because not only are they trying to trick you into giving them a pageview BUT they are also using your site as a billboard (I hide my spam by the way before you start looking for it).


There's a couple other methods too which I'm sure you've all seen. But I hate it. If you're someone who's going to spam my page I will say this now, even if you beg an apology out of me and I tell you I'm sorry, it's a fucking lie. Seriously. I will go to your page, I will hate on you and I will be cruel, mean and more importantly...honest. You've been warned.

]]> ~caffiend http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/14173659/ http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/14173659/ Wed, 15 Aug 2007 01:03:16 PDT
See, I really want this person as a friend. I do. God help me I do. But if I say anything I'm afraid I'll fuck it up. You know, the problem we've been dealing with since junior high that we always think no one else ever has to deal with. Fuck, I dunno. Bah. I got nothing.

]]> ~caffiend http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/13879018/ http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/13879018/ Wed, 25 Jul 2007 19:52:02 PDT
"God is Not Great: How Religion Poison's Everything" [Book]

Umbrella Sword [Not Kidding]

Doctor Who Figure [What? I'm a Whovian]

Driving LED Emoticon [I NEED this]

Mathmos Airswitch [I've wanted one for almost a decade]

LED Japanese Lantern [At least two?]

Laser Star Projector [Because my room demands it]

T-Qualizer Shirt [XL Kthnx]

Invader Surface/Wall Graphics [I like them]

Nintendo Bop Bag [Goomba Please!]

Super Mario Solar Mushroom [For my dash]

Pleo Robotic Life Form [Haha, no one can afford this but still]

Mario Mushroom Chair [Because every home needs it]

42 Towel [Do you have to ask?]

Clocky Robotic Alarm [Cause I can never get up][oh, aqua color plz]

Buster Sword [The dropped the price to about 50!]

Link's Master Sword [I've wanted one since I was still afraid of the dark]

Link's Hylian Shield [The Master Sword's naked without it]

See? All in all not a bad list. I kept the video games out of it but Gamestop giftcards are always FTW too. I'm just saying...this stuff would make you really cool. Myep.

]]> ~caffiend http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/13821700/ http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/13821700/ Sat, 21 Jul 2007 13:57:17 PDT
A friend of mine recently had something she made removed, she used some Pokemon sprites as a basis and worked from there, it was actually something that ended up being an original piece but DA removed it saying it was copy written. She argued it. The removed another of her works. I went to her site to show support and tell her about back in the day DA used to ride my shit about the Megaman stuff I made. Today, the next day, I check my messages to find out DeviantArt removed a wallpaper I made for April ways back. It was a cool wallpaper too. It featured Roll from Megaman and it had boxes for her icons and everything.

I don't know who did it, but I know why. This was someone at DA saying shut up or we'll do it for you. That's how some admins get on DA, you start to mention shit negative about them and they shut you down. Care in point, I go to my earlier mentioned friends site to tell her what happened...she was banned. BANNED. You know what? I know what ever admin that did that to her is probably going to read this and you know what? Fuck you, she was doing nothing wrong. She made those in honor of a game she takes great enjoyment from. By doing this she got other people interested in the game. Just like the shit I used to do that you guys used to ban. I understand the copyright thing. I know her's was so borderline that it came down to a matter of opinion but I tell you what, Nintendo will NEVER come down on a Pokemon fan for making their own fucking trainer card. Are you fucking kidding?

Anywho, whatever admin did this, unblock her fucking site. She's a good kid and it's nonsense what you're doing. I love Deviantart. I love a lot of the staffers here and they've gotten my back on several occasions over shit. So, I love a lot about this.

But...

*deep breath*

....when some FUCKING admin decides that HE is going to take his GODDAMN virginity pains out on a nice FUCKING kid who's a FUCKING sweetheart and is harming NOBODY with her work that I lose a LOT of fucking love for the way this site is ran. Grow up, bring floof back and just go fuck a girl.

]]> ~caffiend http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/13813770/ http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/13813770/ Fri, 20 Jul 2007 20:37:13 PDT
Oh hell, that was the best fucking episode of that show I've ever seen. Everyone needs to go to AdultSwim.com and watch it.

]]> ~caffiend http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/13739994/ http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/13739994/ Sun, 15 Jul 2007 02:37:04 PDT
1) Please, no work that can be considered offensive.

2) Stay away from religious, sexual or political themes.

3) Understand that we are not responsible for replacing art or materials if damaged.

4) Make sure you supply us with the appropriate contact information so we may get a hold of you as soon as your work has been purchased.

5) You may name your own price, but, PLEASE, keep it reasonable.

]]> ~caffiend http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/13703497/ http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/13703497/ Thu, 12 Jul 2007 03:23:10 PDT
This is going to sound crazy...but...I need to skydive. I know, it's silly to say that randomly, but, it kinda isn't and, oh god, I don't even want to type this next part because so many people will take this weird but...I think I'm going to die this year. Slow down, put the phone down, maybe not this year, maybe the next, but probably one of the two. I don't know. It just seems appropriate. And, frankly, that wouldn't be terrible, I've always wanted two things before I die, a family and a coffee shop. I will probably never have a woman that loves me and wants a family, I can accept that, but I will have a coffee shop. So, I'm doing something most people don't get to do. But, back to the death thing, I just feel it. There's been this pressure, in my head, it feels like it's swelling. Every day it gets worse, almost like my head is heavier. My arms have been going numb. Picking up things is sometimes tough and...I havn't really said this too much but...it's hard to play video games. Ha. My worst nightmare. I'm seeing spots from time to time. Every day it worsens. I know it's from stress. But it really feels like something in my body is just going to stop dealing with all this because it hurts. A lot. I don't even want to see a doctor for it. I just want to see where it goes. But yeah, I really really wanna go skydiving. I just do. I want to be in a situation where the only pressure comes from that big blue orb below me.

Ugh, I don't even know where I'm going with this. To be honest, half the time I write these blogs I have NO idea where to go with it, it's just, it's been an interesting month. The pains have gotten worse and worse. The coffee shops been very difficult on me. This woman I was in a relationship with who told me she wasn't ready for a relationship is now happily in a relationship with a guy who looks just like me except he's a decade older and drives a motorcycle. I see about 11 people a day and I'm still lonely. And...please God, I just want to skydive once. That's all. Ha.

]]> ~caffiend http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/13605495/ http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/13605495/ Wed, 04 Jul 2007 10:23:58 PDT
1) I know no one really cares about it but me but the latest season of Doctor Who has been so fucking good I'll watch at least two episodes a day just because it's amazing. The drama is fucking moving. The scifi elements are brilliant. The comedy David Tennant brings to the show is fantastic (no offense to the 9th doctor). It's just really damn good. They even brought back my favorite villian from the old series. My only complaint is the next new episode is the Doctor Who Christmas Special they do every year and...well...you can guess when that is.

2) I am now, pretty much, the co-owner of an Arabica. This is amazing because I've always wanted a coffee shop but I never imagined it could really happen. But it did. With the help of an old friend of mine. It's great too. It's the perfect size for me. It's small enough where I can keep an eye on everything so there's less asshole work but it's big enough where there's a potential to do more with it. Oh, it's great.

3) OK, I know I know, I should probably put the coffee house as 2...but, I found something with even more potential than the coffee shop. I am completely infatuated with this girl now. She has the most brilliant smile I've ever seen, she's smart...I mean, remarkably intellegent, and she's charming and she has the cutest, warmest voice I've ever heard. *sigh* I just hope something develops out of this more than us just liking each other. I mean, I love where we are now but I would so love for something more cause, damn, she's fantastic.

But yeah, so, happy with work, love and shit I do outside of work. Who the fuck would guess that for me huh? I'm never happy about shit. Haha, I'm sorry 2007, I talked a lot of mess about you and...I guess I was wrong. Good work. ]]> ~caffiend http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/13437963/ http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/13437963/ Thu, 21 Jun 2007 19:52:30 PDT
1) As you may have noticed (or may not due to the fact that like, only two people seem to talk to me anymore on here) I have the internet back. So...go me.

2) There's an amazing bar called The Davenport that opened up within half a blocks distance. Fantastic.

3) Remember how I was constantly bitching and moaning because I wasn't working in a coffee house yet? Well fine. Fuck you coffee shop managers. I just became co-owner of my own. So...eat shit. Mwah ha ha. Holy fuck I'm happy.

(Ah, and by coffee house managers I do not include anyone in California. She'll know who she is.)

]]> ~caffiend http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/13241670/ http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/13241670/ Wed, 06 Jun 2007 16:16:30 PDT
1) Internet got shut off at home. Can't afford to pay it along with all my other utilities. So all my fun will be done at the library which makes me fun not so fun. Whee.

2) Deviantart has been making some of my work disappear. Anything I've created in animated GIF form is just not showing up to me and many people. Thanks for the warning DA.

3) I'm STILL not working in a coffee shop yet. Looking into creating a petition.

]]> ~caffiend http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/13217923/ http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/13217923/ Mon, 04 Jun 2007 16:47:28 PDT
]]> ~caffiend http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/13162438/ http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/13162438/ Thu, 31 May 2007 10:24:19 PDT
The lyrics have been completely changed, and to be honest it seems like something that would come from Engrish.com instead of an anthem (which in a way is kind of funny if you think about it long enough). If you're curious, here's the NEW lyrics...

Verse 1

It's sunrise. Do you see by the light of the dawn

What we proudly hailed last nightfall?

Its stars, its stripes

yesterday streamed

above fierce combat

a symbol of victory

the glory of battle, the march toward liberty.

Throughout the night, they proclaimed: "We will defend it!"

Chorus

Tell me! Does its starry beauty still wave

above the land of the free,

the sacred flag?

Verse 2

Its stars, its stripes,

Liberty, we are the same.

We are brothers in our anthem.

In fierce combat, a symbol of victory

the glory of battle,

(My people fight on)

the march toward liberty.

(The time has come to break the chains.)

Throughout the night they proclaimed: "We will defend it!"

Tell me! Does its starry beauty still wave

above the land of the free,

the sacred flag?




My god, this is terrible. If I was a writing teacher I would fail them. Even if I was a math teacher. I would still fail them off of principle. Oh and let me point out something here, if you're trying to create a song to promote national equality? First off, don't call it "Our Anthem" because I know damn well who the OUR is implying and I'm sure it doesn't mean all of us. And secondly, nice line there "Our people fight on". Yeah. Pretty sure you're not talking about me here. Just a fucking hunch. And for some reason, when I read, "Does it's starry beauty still wave" it sounds like a commercial for fucking Lucky Charms. Starry beauty? Seriously, did you even think when you wrote this?

Oh, and that's an even FUNNIER thing to point out. You guys wanna know who wrote this? I went to fucking site, after site, trying to figure this shit out. And the man who actually wrote this, marketed it and is getting most of the money for it is....

*drumroll*

Adam Kidron of Urban Box Office. Adam Kidron? Why...that doesn't sound Spanish at all. Oh wait a minute, that's because he's FUCKING BRITISH! He's not even Spanish! He's just a fucking brit (who's brother should be considered just as bad because he wrote Bridget Jones: On the Edge of Reason) who decided to cash in on the upcoming anger caused by the possibility that we're going to criminalize non-citizen immigrants. My god, I thought we already were! My bad. Fuck. This just has me angry.

Oh, and before I go, if you want your ears to fucking burn, here's a link so you can listen to this mess.


Click the BLUE Link at the Top when you get there for the full song.

]]> ~caffiend http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/12883055/ http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/12883055/ Tue, 08 May 2007 01:56:26 PDT
Secondly, I'd like to point out, before we start my rant, that I would have actually felt less betrayed by Sam Raimi if he would have just urinated on my face and locked me out of the theater.

OK, let's do this. Spider-Man 3 was fucking terrible. I've read review after review about how it's a sappy nonsensical film and thought, ok, maybe the plots weak but the villians are cool and Spider-Man is always fun. Nope. No more. In fact, one of my favorite lines about Spider-Man was a comic writer once said, "what makes working on Spider-Man great is the fact that things aren't happening to Spider-Man, they're happening to Peter Parker." Myep, I no longer believe that.
This movie started off terribly. There was a morbidly long CGI intro showing a massive amount of clips showing everything thing...EVERYTHING...that happened in the first two films. If Aunt May poured herself a drink...it's in the intro.

For the rest of this I'm going to break it down into parts about the characters...

MARY JANE: The film starts. Curtains go up and there's these beautiful stairs going down and a figure is walking down them. Uh-oh, the figure looks like the Bride of Fucking Frankenstein. No wait, that's Kristen Dunst...and...she's FUCKING SINGING! Singing. I swear to god she sings in this movie. And terribly. And if you don't like her singing? Hold tight because she sings two more times in the fucking film. The entire time she's bitching and whining about the fact that Peter can't understand about dealing with stress and people not liking you. You know what? I can't sing either, I don't fucking try to make it on Broadway you stupid fucking...*calm calm calm*. You're dating Spiderman. Deal with it. And for the record, I honestly believe she's in the movie more that Spider-Man and Peter Parker combined. And one last time, to point out how bad her singing was, people were actually groaning audibly in the theater when they knew she was about to start.

PETER PARKER/SPIDER-MAN: I've thought McGuire has always been subpar as Spider-Man but now I know it. I'm dead set on it. And this time around they've also written him to be borderline fucking retarded. It's a good thing he's got a Spider-sense to warn him of approaching danger because all he fucking does is stare confused at shit whenever something unexpected happens. And, oh my god, there's this great scene where the symbiote bonds with Peter and he decides to get emo. I'm dead serious. There is literally a fucking scene where he looking into a mirror and pulls his (now darkened to near black) hair over one eye. Also in the next scene, he's got noticable eyeliner on. He ever goes as far as to fight Harry Osbourn wearing a skin tight emotastic black zip up sweater, unzipped, over his black Spider-Man costume. I'm making none of this up. And when he's Parker? He has a ten fucking minute long scene of him walking around pointing at women like he's Shooter McGaven. Ugh, he's pitiful in this fucking movie.

SANDMAN: First off, they changed his fucking story around so now HE'S the guy who killed Ben Parker. "But wait," you ask, "didn't Spider-Man take care of the killer in the first movie?" Your right Billy. He did! But...they explain it and it's ridiculous. The guy from Wings who plays Sandman hasn't really been in anything since the end of Wings. Watching him in this movie explains exactly why that is. Sand it to fucking good for him, it may as well be stone because his facial expressions do not fucking change. He's like Lindsay Lohan. And than there's this bullshit at the end where he goes to Spider-Man (in regards to the fact he steals because he's trying to pay to fix his sick daughter), "I don't expect you to forgive me, I just want you to understand," and than Spider-Man fucking let's him go! He let's him go! Yeah, I understand Sandman, I understand you fucking just about slaughter half the NYPD earlier in the film. But let's just let that slide because they're extras. And don't you dare tell me it didn't show them dying. When a fucking solid sand fist rocks out down the horizon line and you fly about two city blocks before going through a car wind shield, you're fucking dead. Probably with sand up your ass as well. He killed them but it's cool because he's a daddy. Fuck...that. Oh, and also when they explain how he became Sandman, he just runs in the middle of some unexplained experiment where, I guess they were trying to spin sand as fast as they can. No explanation EVER fucking given for this.

AUNT MAY: Stop putting her in movies. She bores EVERYONE to fucking tears. And she's uncomfortable to listen to as well.... ]]> ~caffiend http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/12799768/ http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/12799768/ Tue, 01 May 2007 06:39:28 PDT
]]> ~caffiend http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/12493775/ http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/12493775/ Sat, 07 Apr 2007 08:41:26 PDT
]]> ~caffiend http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/12483767/ http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/12483767/ Fri, 06 Apr 2007 12:42:29 PDT
]]> ~caffiend http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/12456597/ http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/12456597/ Wed, 04 Apr 2007 12:53:09 PDT
1) Working at the airport I literally see more different people than any other job could possibly display. And seeing this makes me realize something. Why don't we raise our kids anymore? Seriously. It's like, at some point parents decdied that raising our kids meant that they had to occasionally feed and water them. No no no, that's for plants silly. I mean, come on. I'm walking a big heavy cart full of all sorts of shit through the airport and some kid wants to dart in front of me making me stop and spill my cart all over the place and not apologize? Fun. And while I'm talking about kids "darting", when did we put little fucking wheels in the bottom of kids shoes? Who thought THAT was a good fucking idea. And don't even say, "hey, at least they're getting a work out," cause I'll fucking slap you. All the kids I see with wheels on their shoes do the same goddamn thing. They hold on to mommy/daddy/both's arm as they walk and get pulled along side. Work out my husky 38 waist ass. Seriously. Give your kids some fucking manners and make them play outside.

2) Next topic. I really thought I had something amazing the other day. Actually a few weeks ago. Someone I had known for a long time and I kinda decided to see each other. If was really good. No, it was amazing. Unfortunatly...it was also about two days. My problem is, the reasoning. She called it off because the relationship was going to well and she wasn't ready. So, you mean to tell me, for once in my life, the thing that was fucking up the relationship was that I finally got it right? Boy, there's a huge plot twist ain't it? And the worst part is, she hasn't even called me back in like two weeks so this friend of over a decade might be gone now too. Seriously. I'm bummed about this.

3) I really miss the internet. It's been about a week since I lost it and I'm starting to hate the fucking library. I used to love it, but it's so awkward. I'm always stuck next to the same people. Each the wanna be gangsta with his fucking headphones playing what ever shitty rap CD he could buy without being carded. (Don't get me wrong, I don't hate rap. I just hate modern rap) Some creepy 40-year-old with a MySpace and a friends list full of pre-teens and a breathing disorder. (Which, for the record, those three things kinda combine to form a Voltron of a pedifile that only Too Catch a Predator would love.) Or they person who's on their cell phone. When you're in a library talking on a cell phone is like talking on a bull horn. It's amazing.

Anyways, that was my triple rant. Enjoy the plethora of flavors

]]> ~caffiend http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/12375558/ http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/12375558/ Thu, 29 Mar 2007 12:52:13 PDT
]]> ~caffiend http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/12345567/ http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/12345567/ Tue, 27 Mar 2007 04:53:30 PDT
Though, as much as I hate the Ataris version (if you're going to cover a song make a bad song good, don't make a good song lesser) I do give them credit for saying "I saw a Black Flag sticker on a Cadallac," as opposed to Dead Head sticker. That, and ONLY that, is why I keep you alive Ataris.

]]> ~caffiend http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/12243695/ http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/12243695/ Mon, 19 Mar 2007 10:26:52 PDT
On a warm summer's evenin',
On a train bound for nowhere
I met up with the gambler.
We were both too tired to sleep.
So we took turns a-starin'
Out the window at the darkness.
When boredom overtook us,
He began to speak.
(OK, this first part is stricktly to put us in the story. Though, the visual of Kenny Rodgers train hoping is
somewhat humorous)

He said, Son, I've made my life
Out of readin' people's faces.
Knowin' what the cards were
By the way they held their eyes.
So if you don't mind my sayin',
I can see you're out of aces,
For a taste of your whiskey,
I'll give you some advice.
(This part here hit me because I've met much older versions of myself and they always seem
to give me the same advice this fictional drifter was about to lay down)

So I handed him my bottle,
And he drank down my last swallow.
Then he bummed a cigarette
And asked me for a light.
And the night got deathly quiet,
And his face lost all expression.
He said, If
You're gonna play the game, boy,
You gotta learn to play it right.
(OK, this is just more to strengthen the story here.)

You've got to know
When to hold 'em,
Know when to fold 'em
Know when to walk away,
Know when to run.
You never count your money
When you're sittin' at the table.
There'll be time enough for countin'
When the dealin's done.
(Brilliant. You have to know when something's worth holding on to or if it's better to just
leave it be for a while. Or if things get to bad you may actually have to just run. But the second
part's even stronger to me, don't put yourself in the mind frame that you actually have
what you think you have till the end of the hand life's dealing you. You may think you've got
this amazing hand, but sometimes someone else will have something that just
destroys it.)

Now every gambler knows
The secret to survivin'
Is knowin' what to throw away
And knowin' what to keep.
'Cause every hand's a winner
And every hand's a loser
And the best you can hope for
Is to die in your sleep.
(First off, love that last line. But this verse also points out that no matter how bad a situation
it can become something good, but like way, you could be remarkably happy, and it can
all come crashing down [I'll avoid the obvious tower of cards pun here])

And when he finished speakin',
He turned back toward the window,
Crushed out his cigarette
And faded off to sleep.
And somewhere in the darkness,
The gambler he broke even.
And in his final words I found
An ace that I could keep.
(I'm assuming he meant that the gambler dude died. Not sure, but it's a safe bet. This part
is one of my favorite parts if it's true, because I'm at this point that as long as I can die in my sleep
I know at least something went my way.)

You've got to know
When to hold 'em,
Know when to fold 'em
Know when to walk away,
Know when to run.
You never count your money
When you're sittin' at the table.
There'll be time enough for countin'
When the dealin's done.

You've got to know
When to hold 'em,
Know when to fold 'em
Know when to walk away,
Know when to run.
You never count your money
When you're sittin' at the table.
There'll be time enough for countin'
When the dealin's done.

You've got to know
When to hold 'em,
Know when to fold 'em
Know when to walk away,
Know when to run.
You never count your money
When you're sittin' at the table.
There'll be time enough for countin'
When the dealin's done...

(And than for the rest of the song I'm singing along loudly with the verse playing over and over.
Fuck I love that song.)

]]> ~caffiend http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/12155866/ http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/12155866/ Mon, 12 Mar 2007 12:04:34 PDT
Also, I understand that some people may be offended by this. I truly apologize. No one should take this personally. This is not meant to be aimed at anyone in particular. This is only aimed at myself because right now, I'm no good to anyone unless I better myself. I will be back ok? I may be dropping off the map, but I'm going climb right back on top of it later and replant my flag alright?

]]> ~caffiend http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/12130882/ http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/12130882/ Sat, 10 Mar 2007 12:22:49 PST
Now the anime is a lot more commercialized it seems like everyone and their brother is into it. When I got into anime, I used to be afraid to buy it because people would see someone in the tiny tiny anime section of a store and think you were some kind of perfert because than a lot of anime all featured nudity and sex of some sort, even the first Street Fighter and Battle Arena Toshiden had their main female leads take showers and show it. Why? Who knows, but thanks. Now, since everyone's into it and I'm not, newbs to the genre keep calling me a poser and it's driving me nuts. I can't eat with chopsticks (which I love to do, if there's an excuse to eat with them I will because I like it over forks) without someone saying I'm trying to hard. Trying to hard to what? Eat? I love a lot of Japanese foods and snacks and there's a really good place up the street that sells it, but people make comments about me being an anime geek if I have Japanese doughballs in my fridge or a case of Pocky laying out. I don't really like anime anymore, is there a way I can revoke my fucking membership so I have to stop feeling angst towards things I like? Grrr.

(This may have been my most pointless rant ever)

]]> ~caffiend http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/12083136/ http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/12083136/ Tue, 06 Mar 2007 16:00:24 PST
]]> ~caffiend http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/11888254/ http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/11888254/ Mon, 19 Feb 2007 21:35:21 PST
P.S. Booster Gold FTW

]]> ~caffiend http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/11879302/ http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/11879302/ Mon, 19 Feb 2007 09:24:11 PST
Skeet! Skeet! Goddamn!

Anywho, yeah, Ashley, at least you of all people should know who I'm making now. God knows I'm borderline gay enough for the fucking character.

]]> ~caffiend http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/11864199/ http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/11864199/ Sun, 18 Feb 2007 06:49:38 PST
1) I need to be able to put my foot down. Not like walking dumb ass. But I have many people in my life that I pussy foot around without saying what I feel too and while that lets them live their lives happy and gay, at the same time...wait...I said gay *haha*...ahem...at the same time I'm fucking miserable for it. I but on the happy facade and than get home and sit and think about it till I fall asleep.

2) I need to start going to bed early and getting up early. How early? I need to be in bed by 7-8PM and get up 2-4AM. That early. I want farmer time. Why? Two reasons. The first reason is when I start working at the airport I need to be there from four in the morning till noon. And the second reason is number three.

3) I need to start working out. I'm letting my body go to hell. I mean not just, I'm not happy with myself type of hell (though I'm not), I'm also talking about the fact that sometimes my legs will be numb for ten minutes when I stand up. Or it hurts me to get out of bed. I want to be able to actually have some mass on me that wasn't given to me by a bite from a radioactive Hot Pocket. Also, with the new farmer schedule, Omni (this fantastic gym I used to go to) is no opening at 3AM. I'm going to take this as a sign. So when I don't have to work and everyone else is still asleep, I can go to the Omni and actually work out uninteruppted.

4) I need to start cleaning. Fuck. I've let my beautiful home become a mess. EVERY room is a mess. If you want to go through the den to get to the garage, you gotta walk sideways. You can't get to my dresser unless you climb over the bed cause there's so much shit on the floor. It feels like you're doing a military obsticle course just to get through my living room. The only thing that stays clear is my kitchen. Cause I never have a use for it since it seems like I never have food anymore.

So those are four. I'm not going to do a giant list because I don't feel I'm capable of more than that right now. But my god, I need to do this. Obviously number one may take some time as I've let certain individuals walk all over me for so long there's a walking path warn into my back. Number two needs to happen right away because I work soon. I'm getting the hang of it and in all honesty, I love being up that early. It's so quiet. My phone doesn't ring and it's very peaceful. Number three can only happen once I've been working for a while only for the very special reason that, well, I have no fucking money. I would kill to be able to go now...but...can't afford to without money. And number four is going to take a while because I need to be motivated and I've had something on my mind for about a few months now that is sapping all my motivation...if you couldn't tell from the sudden stoppage of me doing woodburns and the like. I need to resolve the thing on my mind (no I'm not telling) and than I can get to four.

]]> ~caffiend http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/11748434/ http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/11748434/ Sun, 11 Feb 2007 02:47:16 PST
And yes, this also means I will no longer listen to the band Boston. Yes, it's that far.

NOTE:My adorable friend ~joulz was asking me what I was talking about. I had forgotten about the fact that no one outside the US seems to know about Cartoon Network, Adult Swim and Aqua Teen Hunger Force SO I will now explain it, like I did to her, in the one world language. The musical. Picture this stage, it's like a news room and they anchorman says, "Today in the news we have a major upset caused in Boston by a popular cartoon show. Here's Eric Holodnak reporting live with more." Cut over to me, there's chaos and people running all over and a camp Welcome to Boston sign in fake flames behind me. "Well..." I say, the music chimes in and I start to sing....

In this little town called Boston,
Cartoon Network caused a stir,
Putting up back lit signs,
of popular characters Ignignokt and Eer!

(They're from Aqua Teen Hunger Force!)

The folks in Boston saw these lights,
And thought something was wrong,
So they called up the police,
Who thought they all were bombs!

The people who paniced got together,
Those that could not compute,
That those were signs and not little bombs,
And they filed a class action suit!

Cartoon Network lost the case,
And two million dollars gave,
Than the CEO resigned,
Putting his career into the grave.

The people of Boston split the money,
Crying about trauma and pain,
I'd like to one by one kick them,
They all have gone insane.

]]> ~caffiend http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/11627357/ http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/11627357/ Tue, 30 Jan 2007 18:48:45 PST [link] and, it's like a drug. Basically what happened is Paris Hilton owned a storage unit, in her "infinite wisdom" neglected to pay the rent on it and the guy who owned it sold the items to people. This girl bought it and is slowly releasing this stuff. At first it was hokey. There were things from her journal about her taking it in the ass for coke. Pictures of a miscarriage certificate and other stuff. Oh, and a picture of a medicine contain for...haha...herpies meds. But now it's getting to be fucking fantastic. Pictures of not only her using different sorts of drugs but Nicole Richie, Tara Reid, Brad Muska, and other do nothing celebs. There's drug use, nudity...pissing? It's the biggest example of a train wreck you can't look away from. I would LOVE to see how these people react to the release of these items. It's remarkable. Haha. I hate celebrities and all this but my god do I love to see bad things happen to bad people.

]]> ~caffiend http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/11608769/ http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/11608769/ Mon, 29 Jan 2007 08:11:46 PST
Here's what bugs me though. All this acceptance to gaming and I still get grief from people from playing MMORPG's (Massive Multiplayer Online Role Playing Game) all the time. I'll have people call me and get frustrated when I want to finish something I started on there before going to do something else. Or they'll joke when they come over and see me playing it. I hate that.

Here's what I love about MMORPG's. I've played many but the one I'm playing right now is Phantasy Star Universe for the 360 so a lot of my explaining's gonna be ripped from there more than anything because I love the Phantasy Star series. Anywho. First thing I love, I can get on the game and, instead of most games where the only people you can talk to are the prescripted computer characters, you can get on at like 3AM (like last night) and go on a mission with, say, a 17 year old girl from Germany with broken English and a 32 year old from Australia. And you can hear them through the headset as well so you're actually TALKING talking with real people. I mean, I don't care how good graphics are, I'm old school about it. But being able to play against someone anywhere on Earth? That's...peaceful. I honestly can't think of another word for that but it opens all sorts of lines of communication.

Secondly, I love the fact that as you start to get bored with the game. You've got all the levels memorized. Yawn. One day, you log on and you can't. "System down for upgrade." You get excited, you go to sleep that night feeling like a kid on the day before his birthday, you wake up, get on the game, and you find out that an entire other planet has been added to the game. Complete with cities, missions, items, enemies. All sorts of stuff. I was complaining to my roomie because the traditional gamer in me couldn't believe there wasn't an ice stage in Phantasy Star Universe. Yesterday, I get on....they added one. Haha, that's fantastic.

Third, I love experience. It's almost like a minor version of climbing a ladder but I love getting my characters to a high level and than helping weaker character out. I love hearing some guy/gal just stop midsentence because they saw my character change into some giant Lion/Man type thing with glowing tribal paint and beat the shit out of some boss only for them to change the flow of topic with..."How the fuck did you just do that." And at the same time, when I'm playing in a mission with some higher level character and she/he whips out some weapon I've NEVER seen before and goes to town on the enemies I get driven. I get inspired to get to that point if only just to later get someone else driven. Sure, it's not much of a goal in life to obtain a 90K Axe or Throwing Knife or Real Hand Gun but you know what? In this world where I can barely seem to hold a job, or for the most part, do ANYTHING right, it's good to know that there's a stable source of short term goals for me to do. And you know what? If and when I DO get that 90K whatever, I'll swell with pride. Silly? Yes. But the high from it still rocks.

So, in closing, I've probably made myself come off like a tool or something. Honestly, I don't care. I love MMORPG's and I'll be playing them for as long as they keep making them. I just wanted you to know, when you poke fun of something, make sure you've seen it from that person's perspective. There's a saying in the Talmud, which is a book about Jewish prinicipals and law and whatnot (no, I'm not Jewish, but it IS an interest read) and it says, hold on, I'm going to look this up so I don't fuck it up...got it...it says, "You don’t see things as they are, you see things as you are." Like many things in life, I think it fits here too.

]]> ~caffiend http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/11561823/ http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/11561823/ Thu, 25 Jan 2007 07:20:09 PST
OK, it looks like I'm going to have to make a chart for many many people. But first, let me explain something. Well no, I'll take that back. Statement first. I appreciate when people are concerned about me. OK, I said that. OK, let's to the explaination. I have been late for several engagements in my life. I have been woken up by many people reminding me I had something to do that day in my life. Ironically I have never been woken up or called by people reminding me I had shit to do that day on a day I wasn't prepared or ready for the shit I had to do that day. I havn't gotten a call from someone saying, "hey, remember you had to do X," only for me to respond with, "oh god, I totally forgot about X!" Never. Now for the fun part. A list. A goddamn, 100% accurate list.

If you call me to remind me of something this is the list of things that will happen.

1)You will call me while I'm in the shower getting ready. I will have to get out of the shower because my roommate keeps knocking on the door to tell me my cell phone is going off, their will be water all over the floor and you will cost me, not counting phone time, at least 10-15 minute in cleaning up water everywhere.

2)You'll call me as I shave. I will probably be trying to fix a goatee. If the shock of the cell phone doesn't send me ripping a line somewhere their shouldn't be I'll probably just have a problem picking up where I left off, saying fuck it, and cutting the whole goddamn thing off.

3)For the record I'm counting cell phone time as 10-15 minutes. Here's the exact conversation.

You:Hey, good morning.
Me: (Either tired or hurried depending on when you called)What's up?
You:Just calling to remind you of X.
Me: Thanks, I got it all planned though.
You: Well still, you might wanna be getting ready.
Me: Yeah, I'm on it thanks.
Than an endless series of questions about the event pop up. 10-15 minutes gone.

4)You will call me WAY to fucking early, I will ignore your call because I'm trying to get some ready before hand. You will call again, and again, and again because if I have to be at X at noon and I'm not up at 7AM you're super fucking OMGing because I over slept. The continous calling will than wake up violently, and pissed mind you, and send me into my day, one of the angriest, moodiest, sons of bitches you've ever witnessed. Anyone I have to make an impression on will now only be impressed by just who pissed off I am at just about everything. I will open mail by ripping it in half and greet passer bys with only one fifth of my hand. Not to mention that I will have to vent equalling me here bitching. That alone is 15 minutes gone. I'd say phone time but if you call and wake me up, let me clear, I will NOT PICK UP THE FUCKING PHONE AND TALK TO YOU NOW. Haha, but luckily for you, that's such a lucky gesture on me part to you. Cause if you talked to me now you'd never want to again.

Anyways, in closing. Here's a sketch I came up with.

There's an office, everyone working there is me. The business is called My Life.
Stranger walks in goes to the front desk.
This person, unlike the hundreds of other people there, is NOT me.
Front desk me says, "Hi, welcome to My Life. Can I help you."
Stranger, "Yeah, I'd like to speak to the man in charge about an intership here."
Confused front desk person, "Um, sure, let me get the boss."
Boss me comes out, in a suit no less, "Hi! Welcome to My Life, I'm Eric, what can I do for you?"
Stranger, "Yeah, I'd like to apply for an intership here. I've taken a great interest in your company and would like to help out and input my own ideas and things of that nature.
Boss me, "Well, we're really not used to that sort of thing here as we're pretty self sufficient but, well, if you're going to want to help I guess we can give it a shot.
Cut to a scene of a building either blowing up in flames, a shot of a nuclear blast or for shock value a little 9/11

And yes, there's a moral in that story.

]]> ~caffiend http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/11536424/ http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/11536424/ Mon, 22 Jan 2007 23:21:05 PST i saw a dead head sticker on a cadillac
a voice inside my head said don't look back
you can never look back"

Haha, god, life is so fucked right now.

Good: I'm dating someone now.

Bad: I got fired.

Good: I'm making money doing odd jobs.

Bad: I got fired. Fuck I hate that.

I dunno. Shit's wacky.

]]> ~caffiend http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/11187254/ http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/11187254/ Mon, 25 Dec 2006 10:29:45 PST No snow.
Raining.
James Brown died.

What a weird Xmas so far huh? Well let's all work to make the rest of this day better shall we?

Merry Christmas bitches. I'm Rick James.

]]> ~caffiend http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/11042677/ http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/11042677/ Tue, 12 Dec 2006 17:04:47 PST tentaclees has me hooked on this site called Threadless. Oh my fucking god, I luvs it. It's got the coolest damn shirts. These are the ones I found so far that I abso-fucking-lutly need.....

Birds & The Bees
Damn Scientists
Game-Set-Match
Corporate Zombie
Nuts!
Ah Munna Eat Choo
Zombie Donkey
Emotional Trip
Heart Destroy
You Sank My Battleship
Snack
Fuck It
Dad?
The Internet
BFF
We're Toast
Dark Side of the Garden
Stabby McKnife
My Pet Human
The Fast Supper
The Morning After
Operation Needed
Heroes in an Art Shell
Of the Dead
Come Back at Night
Cookie Loves Milk
It's a Sing Along
Grassoline
Biblical Disaster
Canada Owes Me
Nerds Unite!
Best Mime Ever
If a Had a Tornado Body
Bad Teddy
Lil Soap
Ambition Killed the Cat
Bunnies
Nothing Rhymes with Orange
You've Got Some 'Splaining To Do
Satan's Little Helper
This is Not a Pipe
Shakespeare Hates Your Emo Poems

So yeah, you know, in case anyone needs ideas for Christmas.

]]> ~caffiend http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/10988642/ http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/10988642/ Thu, 07 Dec 2006 20:25:29 PST
OK, so I watched, finally, the second Pirates of the Carribean movie. First off, fuck everybody for blowing every secret of the movie but the cliffhanger ending. Secondly, I liked these movies better when they were called STAR WARS. OK, first off before I go into it, let's compare the characters...

Will Turner - Luke Skywalker. Goody goody. Somewhat of a child. Shitty job/life until he decides to become a hero. Somewhat of a little bitch.

Beth Swan - Princess Leia. Royalty. After years of being sheltered wants to prove her own. Tom boyish. Oddly good at fighting thought having no training.

Jack Sparrow - Han Solo. Pirate. Egotistical. Get's all the one liners. Pilots all the ships needed to escape.

The two weird pirates (w/the one who's eye's falling out) - R2D2 and C3PO. Just there for comedic relief. Serves about no purpose in the movie. Yet get there own side plots. Both duos have a member who keeps losing body parts.

Barbosa - Lando. Both are people sided with evil until something makes them fight for the side of good to help Jack/Han out of sure doom. Barbosa was also friends with Jack originally just as Lando was with Han.

I can go on and on with the characters. I could even stretch it and say Voodoo lady and Yoda are pretty simliar. Both live in a tree, both help teach a magical force, blah blah blah. But on to the plot comparisson.

First off, I don't count Episodes 1-3. I'm sticking with the originals. Episode 4-6. Anyways....

The second original Star Wars movie ended up with Han Solo being frozen in carbonite and shipped off. The second Pirates of the Carribean ended up with Jack eaten off his ship.

Like I mentioned earlier, Will and Luke both had horribly mondane jobs and were both quick as hell to jump into heroism.

All the Star Wars folks are bound to the Force and the code of the Council. While the Pirates crew are bound to weird magic and the code of pirates.

Both Luke and Will found their dad reluctantly working for the "dark side".

People mistook Swan for being related to Will. People found out Leia was related to Luke.

Both Han and Jack has their own signature ship. (IE Millenium Falcon/Black Pearl)

Both second films featured the introduction of a massive superweapon that was damaged heavily only to inevitably return in the third. (Kraken/Death Star)

I mean if you wanna look ever further into this. Both Jack and Han had a permanent crew member who couldn't speak English (Chewie/Guy w/parrot)

Both series features a tribe of some sort mistaking one of their own for a god and trying to eat people. (Canibals/Ewoks)

Jedi's are lead by the magical force when they don't know where to go. Pirates are lead by a magical compass when they don't know where to go.

Both were sounded by Skywalker Sound.

I mean, did anyone else not fucking see this?

]]> ~caffiend http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/10938862/ http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/10938862/ Sun, 03 Dec 2006 16:21:23 PST [link] if you want. But I just, I dunno, I love finding people using the same handles as me. It's like, well, you all know I'm a comic geek so I'm gonna geek out here. But it's like I've been using this nickname for a long time and when I see someone else using it I feel like a DC character. DC taught me that handles can be very important. Not like Marvel where it's one name per person and if they die, the name goes with. But at DC they make a handle a title not a name. Like the Flash. How many people go by the Flash you know? So far (for the record) 5. But everytime someone uses the name Caffiend I'm instantly compelled to search them out, learn about them and make sure they're honoring the name. I'm not going there and saying, "please stop using my name" because it's not my name. If there was someone putting up a journal called Confessions of Eric Holodnak" that would be one thing. But where her journal's called Confessions of a Caffiend the only thing that comes to my mind is, "that's so cool." So welcome another Caffiend to the fold. Now it's me, her and ~C4FF sharing the name as far as I know. I'll be looking for more later. Maybe start a super group.

]]> ~caffiend http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/10923703/ http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/10923703/ Sat, 02 Dec 2006 10:28:54 PST
]]> ~caffiend http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/10885721/ http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/10885721/ Wed, 29 Nov 2006 00:57:33 PST
]]> ~caffiend http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/10707104/ http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/10707104/ Mon, 13 Nov 2006 00:10:15 PST
]]> ~caffiend http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/10520176/ http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/10520176/ Thu, 26 Oct 2006 18:25:01 PDT
Another thing that kills me is that I always considered myself (and yes, this is egotistical) one of the smarter ones. It's true. But I'm noticing that while I'm stuck in my tiny condo making just enough money to get by, that almost everyone else has something in their life that they wanted that I'll never have. Whether it's the ones that are financially stable with a kid. The ones happily married. Or even the ones that have jobs beyond ANYTHING I ever hope to achieve. I know the guy who created Alien Hominid. I know people that now work for Marvel. Who work for Squareenix. Who work with Dr. Dre. Who have moves to Scottland, or England or Germany for work. Me? I'm still in the same fucking place making nothing. And I thought I was so ahead of my game when I moved out before anyone else my age. I was like, "haha, I got my own place." Now they're all, "haha, we're happy." Owned. Fuck.

]]> ~caffiend http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/10396227/ http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/10396227/ Sat, 14 Oct 2006 23:47:56 PDT
]]> ~caffiend http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/10277368/ http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/10277368/ Tue, 03 Oct 2006 23:59:45 PDT
]]> ~caffiend http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/10231593/ http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/10231593/ Fri, 29 Sep 2006 23:40:08 PDT
]]> ~caffiend http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/10219810/ http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/10219810/ Thu, 28 Sep 2006 20:34:58 PDT ower-email"LINK and try it. Please? If you use that link I'll get a bunch of credits. Just try it and try chatting with someone. OK?

P.S. Venture Brothers stuff is almost done.

]]> ~caffiend http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/10004612/ http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/10004612/ Thu, 07 Sep 2006 23:50:42 PDT
______________________________________

OK, so I thought I put this up here, but I guess I didn't. I have an idea. I want to do small woodburns of various Venture Brothers characters. Close up Profiles of the various characters. I have four in mind right now...

1)Doctor Girlfriend
2)Helper
3)Hank
4)Dean

And I've already found a close of up Doctor Girlfriend, but I need to find good close ups of the other characters. If anyone has any good screenshots or what not let me know. Here's the other characters I have planned...in order...

5)Monarch
6)Doctor Venture
7)Brock Samson
8)#21
9)#24
10)Phantom Limb
11)Jonas Venture Jr.
12)Pete White
13)Billy Quizkid
14)Baron Underbite
15)Lord Orpheus
16)And his daughter (I can't remember her name right now)

Eventually my goal is to have this 4x4 grid. If more characters are added I can do more rows but I want to keep it an even square. My other ideas for later rows are, in no order:

1)Catclops
2)Girl Hitler
3)Manic Eight-ball
4)The Inquisitor
5)Whatever villian Orpheus's daughter's friend becomes
6)Molatov Cocktease
7)The original Team Venture ]]> ~caffiend http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/9935699/ http://caffiend.deviantart.com/journal/9935699/ Fri, 01 Sep 2006 23:09:37 PDT
Haha, and since I know someone's gonna read this...gee, I wonder why the strength of my woodburning pen's tip was weakened. Why...it's almost as if someone dropped it? Hmmm? HMMMM? Haha.
________________________________________ ___

OK, so I thought I put this up here, but I guess I didn't. I have an idea. I want to do small woodburns of various Venture Brothers characters. Close up Profiles of the various characters. I have four in mind right now...

1)Doctor Girlfriend
2)Helper
3)Hank
4)Dean

And I've already found a close of up Doctor Girlfriend, but I need to find good close ups of the other characters. If anyone has any good screenshots or what not let me know. Here's the other characters I have planned...in order...

5)Monarch
6)Doctor Venture
7)Brock Samson
8)#21
9)#24
10)Phantom Limb
11)Jonas Venture Jr.
12)Pete White
13)Billy Quizkid
14)Baron Underbite
15)Lord Orpheus
16)And his daughter (I can't remember her name right now)

Eventually my goal is to have this 4x4 grid. If more characters are added I can do more rows but I want to keep it an even square. My other ideas for later rows are, in no order:

1)Catclops
2)Girl Hitler
3)Manic Eight-ball
4)The Inquisitor
5)Whatever villian Orpheus's daughter's friend becomes
6)Molatov Cocktease
7)The original Team Venture ]]> ~caffiend