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        <title>deviantART: by:candyapplesex</title>
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        <pubDate>Fri, 18 Dec 2009 13:16:22 PST</pubDate>        
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                  <item>
                <title>Ideas</title>
                <link>http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/28966280/</link>
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                <pubDate>Tue, 15 Dec 2009 17:09:16 PST</pubDate>
                
                <description><![CDATA[ So I keep having ideas of things to draw and what not, but I never have my sketch pad near me so I write myself a note of what my idea is, yet haven't gotten to accutally making them. Oh the joys of procrastination...<br /><br /> ]]></description>
                <author>~candyapplesex</author>
            </item>
          <item>
                <title>Journal Skin Offically!!</title>
                <link>http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/28390517/</link>
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                <pubDate>Mon, 16 Nov 2009 08:30:17 PST</pubDate>
                
                <description><![CDATA[ Thanks Ninja Assassin!!<br /><br /><div class="credit"><br /><a href="http://sourcow.deviantart.com/art/Flower-STOCK-55502670">Flower :STOCK:</a> by =<a class="u" href="http://sourcow.deviantart.com/">sourcow</a> | <a href="http://luizalenora.deviantart.com/art/Arabesque-Brushes-36473607">Arabesque Brushes</a> by ~<a class="u" href="http://luizalenora.deviantart.com/">Luizalenora</a> | <a href="http://redheadstock.deviantart.com/art/Foliage-Swirls-80455211">Foliage Swirls</a> by *<a class="u" href="http://redheadstock.deviantart.com/">redheadstock</a> | <a href="http://kuschelirmel-stock.deviantart.com/art/Twirl-Border-Brushes-37708243">Twirl Border Brushes</a> by =<a class="u" href="http://kuschelirmel-stock.deviantart.com/">kuschelirmel-stock</a></div> ]]></description>
                <author>~candyapplesex</author>
            </item>
          <item>
                <title>Threadless</title>
                <link>http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/27297146/</link>
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                <pubDate>Sat, 19 Sep 2009 10:02:01 PDT</pubDate>
                
                <description><![CDATA[ I posted a slogan for Threadless' Type Tees, vote for me ^.^ <a href="http://www.deviantart.com/users/outgoing?http://typetees.threadless.com/score/1685361/I_love_it_when_you_talk_nerdy_to_me">[link]</a><br /><br /> ]]></description>
                <author>~candyapplesex</author>
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          <item>
                <title>I've been Tagged</title>
                <link>http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/25651551/</link>
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                <pubDate>Tue, 30 Jun 2009 12:49:46 PDT</pubDate>
                
                <description><![CDATA[ I was tagged by ~<a class="u" href="http://kairathegreat.deviantart.com/">KairaTheGreat</a><br /><br />RULES:<br />1. Answer the following questions and post it in your journal.<br />2. Tag all your watchers. (Add a comment to all of your watchers)<br />3. Post "You've been tagged. Read the rules in my journal entry."<br />in the comment.<br /><br />P E R S O N A L<br /><br />Real Name: Maryann<br />Nickname: Pagy, Peaches, Boo Boo<br />DeviantArt Name: CandyAppleSex<br />Country: US<br />Gender: Female<br /><br /><br />F A V O R I T E S<br /><br />Colour: Pink and Black<br />Food: Pasta and Peaches<br />Drinks: Tea and Water<br />Movie at the moment (1only): What Dreams May Come<br />Song at the moment (1 only): Pretty Handsome Akward by the Used<br />TV Program (1 only): Currently Degrassi<br />TV Channel (1 only): Currently USA<br />Book: Currently Harry Potter<br />Ice Cream flavour: Vanilla Bean<br /><br />V E R S U S<br />What do you like most?<br /><br />-Sweet or Spicy?:<br />Spicy<br />-White chocolate or dark chocolate?:<br />Dark...I'd rather milk though<br />-School or Mall?:<br />Mall <br />-Desktop Computer or Laptop?:<br />Laptop<br />-Ice Cream or Cake?:<br />Ice cream<br />-Anime or Cartoons?:<br />Anime<br />-PSP or PS2?:<br />PS2...I'd rather PS3<br />-Sony or Panasonic?:<br />Panasonic<br />-RnB or POP?:<br />...............<br /><br /><br />D E V I A N T A R T<br /><br />-What is your most favourite deviation in your gallery?<br />Currently my Bonfire series <br />-Who is your first watcher?<br />~<a class="u" href="http://aceofhearts.deviantart.com/">AceOfHearts</a><br />-How many watchers do you have right now?<br />42<br />-How many deviation/s do you have?<br />575<br />-At the moment, how many are your page views?<br />7,492<br />-Whom of your watchers do you talk the most?<br />~<a class="u" href="http://imxthexgddmxbatman.deviantart.com/">imxthexgddmxbatman</a><br />-Are you a subscriber?<br />I was<br />-When did you start using DeviantArt?<br />2005 ish<br /><br /> ]]></description>
                <author>~candyapplesex</author>
            </item>
          <item>
                <title>random</title>
                <link>http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/25370209/</link>
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                <pubDate>Wed, 17 Jun 2009 09:59:13 PDT</pubDate>
                
                <description><![CDATA[ i'm planning of painting hello kitty warhol style ^.^ i'm excited, it was acctually chris's idea and he says if i paint it he will make it the center of our living room when we move out ^.^<br /><br /> ]]></description>
                <author>~candyapplesex</author>
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          <item>
                <title>contests</title>
                <link>http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/24273371/</link>
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                <pubDate>Thu, 16 Apr 2009 12:33:58 PDT</pubDate>
                
                <description><![CDATA[ so i plan on entering 2 contests!! <a href="http://news.deviantart.com/article/76573/">wacom</a> and <a href="http://news.deviantart.com/article/76118/">addias</a> i'm so excited!! i already started sketching the wacom one! i might even video the progress ^.-<br /><br /> ]]></description>
                <author>~candyapplesex</author>
            </item>
          <item>
                <title>update</title>
                <link>http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/24132537/</link>
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                <pubDate>Wed, 08 Apr 2009 16:02:07 PDT</pubDate>
                
                <description><![CDATA[ so my case is being tossed between hunterdon and somerset, all because the judge in hunterdaon is retiring, even though he wouldn't mind being judge on trial 3. the new judge knows my grandfather, as does the judge in somerset, conflicts of intrest to the extreme, i think it should go to another county but cant do that, i realy dont want either judge but the somerset one knows him better, so the hunterdon one would be better. i wish my grandfather was a hermit and knew no one... this seriously sucks but hopfully this next trial will be the last and he will be found guilty, besides what my grandfather thinks...<br /><br /> ]]></description>
                <author>~candyapplesex</author>
            </item>
          <item>
                <title>trial number three</title>
                <link>http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/23939111/</link>
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                <pubDate>Sat, 28 Mar 2009 18:23:41 PDT</pubDate>
                
                <description><![CDATA[ So my uncle didn't take the plea. The prosecutor was given one week to talk to me and my dad so i guess next week will be trial number 3... It's just so frustrating. He would've gotten away with so much if he just taken the plea. So now i get to tell my story over again... Worst part is since i've been off my meds i started remembering more, but it too late to use that now, i cant change my testimony... I hate him so much. This is so frustrating. First trial was hung because someone didn't believe me, second trial was guilty but that got thrown out the window like a two ish years later because he won an appeal. An appeal stating that my fresh commplaint witness basically wasn't "fresh" enough. We give him the chance to plea out to ludeness and to have a restraining order. No megans's law, which i still want. It would look better on his record, but no he wants to play this game. I don't know... I almost want to give up, but i wont, i will not give him that.<br /><br /> ]]></description>
                <author>~candyapplesex</author>
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          <item>
                <title>3/22/2009</title>
                <link>http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/23834613/</link>
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                <pubDate>Sun, 22 Mar 2009 15:31:36 PDT</pubDate>
                
                <description><![CDATA[ today chris proposed to me!! i said yes! it was adorable, we went to lucky leo's in sea side to play a "new" claw machine that he had them rig. he got the box and turned it in at the counter and they gave a cracker jack box (the "new" claw was supposed to be a cracker jack theme) and he wanted me to open it but i of course dont like opening things, so he opened it and told me maybe i should get the prize. sitting on top was a ring, he got down on one knee and propsed! then he tells me too look to might right, a friend was there taking pictures, i look left another friend is taking pictures and another video taped it!<br /><br />i will post the video when we get a copy and pictures will be posted!<br /><br />i'm so happy i'm at a lose for words XD<br /><br /> ]]></description>
                <author>~candyapplesex</author>
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          <item>
                <title>R.I.P. Grandpop</title>
                <link>http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/23395511/</link>
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                <pubDate>Wed, 25 Feb 2009 08:59:52 PST</pubDate>
                
                <description><![CDATA[ my grandfather died yesterday, he was only 62. he's been sick for the past few months and they thought he was getting better then monday night he took a turn for the worse and they said he didn't have much longer... i dunno....<br /><br /> ]]></description>
                <author>~candyapplesex</author>
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          <item>
                <title>rumor....</title>
                <link>http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/22712399/</link>
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                <pubDate>Wed, 21 Jan 2009 12:08:24 PST</pubDate>
                
                <description><![CDATA[ So to elaborate on this rumor. One of my best friends got a text from a friend of hers talking about a text she got about me being pregnant. Now i never really hung out with either of these people, better part i dont know who would've started this or why they would think it anyways. It's just annoying. Last time a rumor flew around about me was when i was being hospitalized people thought i killed someone, obviously i didn't if they didn't locked me up...whatever i would just like to know who started this current one and why. And this rumor is stoping here, trust me if i was pregnant u'd all know by now.<br /><br /><br /><br /><br />and i woke up really sick today <img src="http://e.deviantart.com/emoticons/f/frown.gif" width="15" height="15" alt=":(" title=":( (Sad)" /><br /><br /> ]]></description>
                <author>~candyapplesex</author>
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          <item>
                <title>sg</title>
                <link>http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/22268061/</link>
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                <pubDate>Mon, 29 Dec 2008 19:58:36 PST</pubDate>
                
                <description><![CDATA[ Watching the first tour i relized that i've wanted to take my clothes off my entire life. Even though i dont really like my body, which is way i haven't started yet. It seems i wanted to be an sg before there even was sg. Some days i wonder what people would think about me always wanting to be naked to the world even after my uncle abused me. I guess thats why i hide so much from my family. Why i hold back. The origional name i would have chosen if i was to become an sg has been taken, but i think i have a good one now. I just need to get in shape not just physically but mentally and relase my inner sg!<br /><br /> ]]></description>
                <author>~candyapplesex</author>
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          <item>
                <title>xmas 08</title>
                <link>http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/22260408/</link>
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                <pubDate>Mon, 29 Dec 2008 12:26:26 PST</pubDate>
                
                <description><![CDATA[ so xmas was good this year. went to my dad's first wher i got lots of gift cards (always good) from them and my grandparents, my dad gave me money for school, my grandparents also gave me a bracelet, a sketch book, and pencils ^.^ then off to visit my mom at my aunt debbie and uncle eddie's she gave me a gift card as well as my grandma, my brother gave me a cute tweety radio (he picked it out all by himself), and my aunt debbie and uncle eddie gave me a make up kit. uncle eddie dressed as santa and took us on a horse and carriage ride around the neighborhood, we gave candy canes to kids. then we wnt to chris's brother's for the whole family. chris gave me a sun jar (it's a jar that 'collects' sun in the day to use at night), a dinosaur plant (it's a plant that cant be killed lol), a space crystals growing kit, and a water clock! his parents gave me an ed hardy pj set as well as money and money from his grandfather. saturday was secret santa and i got really good drawing paper and prismacolor colored pencils!!!!! afterwards chris and i went to see video games live!!!! it was awsome!!!!!!!!!!<br /><br /> ]]></description>
                <author>~candyapplesex</author>
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          <item>
                <title>yule</title>
                <link>http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/22117863/</link>
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                <pubDate>Mon, 22 Dec 2008 08:54:13 PST</pubDate>
                
                <description><![CDATA[ yule was awsome chris got me th new sg book the sg world tour movie, 5 microbs from think geek, two led candles (one can light up red or green and the other can light up yellow or blue), he also got me a stapleless staple in the shape of a cat ^.^ he got me a lava lamp phone charm that lights whe ur phone rings, but my phone isn't compatable T.T its ok though it was the thought that counts!!<br /><br />oh and i started reading harry potter last week i think, i'm on book 4 lol.<br /><br /> ]]></description>
                <author>~candyapplesex</author>
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          <item>
                <title>bettie page died</title>
                <link>http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/21944911/</link>
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                <pubDate>Fri, 12 Dec 2008 10:03:04 PST</pubDate>
                
                <description><![CDATA[ <a href="http://www.time.com/time/arts/article/0,8599,1866059,00.html?imw=Y">[link]</a><br /><br /> ]]></description>
                <author>~candyapplesex</author>
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          <item>
                <title>R.I.P. Quistis</title>
                <link>http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/21652145/</link>
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                <pubDate>Mon, 24 Nov 2008 17:23:38 PST</pubDate>
                
                <description><![CDATA[ Quistis Badger - August 1, 1999 - November 24, 2008<br /><br />we had to put Quistis down today, we found out she was sick because she had cancer. a tumor took over her liver and there was nothing we could do...<br /><br /> ]]></description>
                <author>~candyapplesex</author>
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          <item>
                <title>Blank</title>
                <link>http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/21338146/</link>
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                <pubDate>Wed, 05 Nov 2008 10:59:13 PST</pubDate>
                
                <description><![CDATA[ so i got a call from the prosecuter....a higher court over turned my uncle's conviction....they feel that alex's testimony shouldn't have been alloud because i told her too far after it happened....they can see if the surpreme court can over turned the other court, or get my uncle to plea to something with time served, or a 3rd trial....right now megan's law has been removed....not sure if i will get megan's law back....i have no idea how to react right now....<br /><br /><br />edit: made it in the paper:<br /><a href="http://www.nj.com/news/index.ssf/2008/11/hunterdon_county_mans_convicti.html">[link]</a><br /><br /> ]]></description>
                <author>~candyapplesex</author>
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          <item>
                <title>First Word</title>
                <link>http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/21003344/</link>
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                <pubDate>Wed, 15 Oct 2008 15:02:06 PDT</pubDate>
                
                <description><![CDATA[ I randomly started wondering about who made words? Why do the mean what they do? What was the first word ever created? Was is spoken or thought of first? How did we comunicate before that? How did we have thoughts before that? Does the first word still exist? Does it still have the same meaning? How could we ever truly figure out the answer? It's no like we evolved with a full vocabulary. And for that matter, how did we know how to translate from speaking animal to speaking human? What was the first communication ever? How did this all come to be? Did we just always communicate? Do we just know how with out knowing why? Hmmm... Now that i got my ponderings out..<br /><br />Update on life:<br />So i last posted about my meds, i decided to elaborate since i was took shocked to talk last time. An SSRI should only be taken for a year, i've been taking one for 5. It should not be given to children, teens, or young adults, which means i probibly shouldn't have been put on it untill i was like 25. It was relased in 1998, not really long enough to understand long term effects. All of the side effects truely come about the longer u take it. Most of u know that i've been felling sick for a long time now, i'm constantly nauseous. Well it's a side effect. Lack of sleep, as well as drowsiness and falling asleep while driving. Hmm... Didn't i do that. Wieght loss or gain. I have put on like 50lbs in the past 5 years. Loss of appitite, i used to be able to eat alot, not so much anymore. Craving sweets, well damn thats why i've been eating alot of crap and just cant help it and when i try to ignore the cravings i binge. Memory loss, yea my memory went to shit, sometimes i cant remember my own birthday, oh and i've been misspelling my middle name. Increased thirst, very much a definate. Thoughts of suicide, yea that's been getting worse again, could it be that i've been on it too long? Depression, wai isn't it suppossed to help? Oh that's right is supposed to balance ur serotonin levels after awhlie it can't be balanced anymore because it doesn't need it anymore. Lack of concintration, yea got that one. Blurry vision, well i do feel like my vision has gotten worse, but i dont know if this med caused it. Twitching, yea i twitch but  play it off because i hate it. Cant sit still. Loss of creativity, i havn't been doing the greast with my art work in a very long time and i dispise that! I'm sure there are more. This week i'm going to the doctors and asking to be taken off. I'd do it myself but i need to be monotered. So yea...<br /><br /> ]]></description>
                <author>~candyapplesex</author>
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          <item>
                <title>fun...</title>
                <link>http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/20951060/</link>
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                <pubDate>Sun, 12 Oct 2008 10:11:32 PDT</pubDate>
                
                <description><![CDATA[ so i found out that my medication is causing my current depression and bad thoughts are from my meds. my memory loss, my skin peeling when i scratch, my twitches, my very low bp, my tiredness, just everything practically....<br /><br /> ]]></description>
                <author>~candyapplesex</author>
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          <item>
                <title>yay oww</title>
                <link>http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/20441269/</link>
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                <pubDate>Thu, 11 Sep 2008 15:37:03 PDT</pubDate>
                
                <description><![CDATA[ i got my wisdom tooth pulled<br /><br /> ]]></description>
                <author>~candyapplesex</author>
            </item>
          <item>
                <title>Uncle</title>
                <link>http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/20216198/</link>
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                <pubDate>Fri, 29 Aug 2008 09:53:10 PDT</pubDate>
                
                <description><![CDATA[ my uncle is up for parole release on march 15th 2009. i get to write a statement on my feelings of him being released. i feel like cutting.<br /><br /> ]]></description>
                <author>~candyapplesex</author>
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          <item>
                <title>fighting with a paintbrush</title>
                <link>http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/20036988/</link>
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                <pubDate>Tue, 19 Aug 2008 07:53:04 PDT</pubDate>
                
                <description><![CDATA[ <a href="http://current.com/items/88858589_fighting_with_a_paint_brush">[link]</a><br /><br /> ]]></description>
                <author>~candyapplesex</author>
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          <item>
                <title>update</title>
                <link>http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/19900409/</link>
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                <pubDate>Mon, 11 Aug 2008 15:39:24 PDT</pubDate>
                
                <description><![CDATA[ so my transfer went through i started in watchung yesterday. today i started my second job, spencers!! because my schedule is weird text me first if u want to call me just to make sure i'm not working. *loves*<br /><br /> ]]></description>
                <author>~candyapplesex</author>
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          <item>
                <title>sign this petition</title>
                <link>http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/19360565/</link>
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                <pubDate>Sat, 12 Jul 2008 19:22:33 PDT</pubDate>
                
                <description><![CDATA[ stupid kathy lee griffen made a "nasty bad pagans" speech on tv. protest this please<br /><br /> <a href="http://www.thepetitionsite.com/1/quotnasty-bad-pagansquot-protesting-hate-speech-on-nbc">protest pagan hate speech</a><br /><br />Clubs<br /><a href="http://dapagan.deviantart.com/"><img class="avatar" src="http://a.deviantart.com/avatars/d/a/dapagan.gif" width="50" height="50" alt=":icondapagan:" title="dapagan"/></a><br /><a href="http://the-zodiac-club.deviantart.com/"><img class="avatar" src="http://a.deviantart.com/avatars/t/h/the-zodiac-club.gif" width="50" height="50" alt=":iconthe-zodiac-club:" title="the-zodiac-club"/></a><br /><a href="http://felinefans.deviantart.com/"><img class="avatar" src="http://a.deviantart.com/avatars/f/e/felinefans.gif" width="50" height="50" alt=":iconfelinefans:" title="felinefans"/></a><br /><a href="http://dysmorphics.deviantart.com/"><img class="avatar" src="http://a.deviantart.com/avatars/d/y/dysmorphics.gif" width="50" height="50" alt=":icondysmorphics:" title="dysmorphics"/></a> ]]></description>
                <author>~candyapplesex</author>
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          <item>
                <title>fell asleep while drving and hit a gaurd rail</title>
                <link>http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/19307741/</link>
                <guid isPermaLink="true">http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/19307741/</guid>
                <pubDate>Thu, 10 Jul 2008 09:54:03 PDT</pubDate>
                
                <description><![CDATA[ so yea i fell asleep on my way home from work and hit a gaurd rail and murdered my front tire. so yea i dunno...<br /><br />Clubs<br /><a href="http://dapagan.deviantart.com/"><img class="avatar" src="http://a.deviantart.com/avatars/d/a/dapagan.gif" width="50" height="50" alt=":icondapagan:" title="dapagan"/></a><br /><a href="http://the-zodiac-club.deviantart.com/"><img class="avatar" src="http://a.deviantart.com/avatars/t/h/the-zodiac-club.gif" width="50" height="50" alt=":iconthe-zodiac-club:" title="the-zodiac-club"/></a><br /><a href="http://felinefans.deviantart.com/"><img class="avatar" src="http://a.deviantart.com/avatars/f/e/felinefans.gif" width="50" height="50" alt=":iconfelinefans:" title="felinefans"/></a><br /><a href="http://dysmorphics.deviantart.com/"><img class="avatar" src="http://a.deviantart.com/avatars/d/y/dysmorphics.gif" width="50" height="50" alt=":icondysmorphics:" title="dysmorphics"/></a> ]]></description>
                <author>~candyapplesex</author>
            </item>
          <item>
                <title>update</title>
                <link>http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/18736581/</link>
                <guid isPermaLink="true">http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/18736581/</guid>
                <pubDate>Sun, 08 Jun 2008 19:03:27 PDT</pubDate>
                
                <description><![CDATA[ i've decided to start attending an eating disorder support group. they meet tuesday nights and at the same time they have a friends and family ed support group (anyone who wants to got to it ask and i'll give u info). i've been watching my eating habit more and i haven't fully binged in about 2 days, and what i mean by fully is i stop myself if i start. i have not purged in 1 week. i'm working at getting better and finding myself a stable support system. so yea thats my update<br /><br /><br />"Please Please Please" by Fiona Apple<br /><br />Please please please<br />No more melodies<br />They lack impact, they're petty<br />They've been made up already<br />Please please please<br />No more maladies<br />I'm so tired of crying<br />You'd think I was a siren<br />But me and everybody's on the sad same team<br />And you can hear our sad brain screaming<br /><br />Give us something familiar<br />Something similar<br />To what we know already<br />That will keep us steady<br />Steady<br />Steady going nowhere<br /><br />Please please please<br />No apologies<br />At best they buy you time<br />Until you next step out of line<br />Please please please<br />No more remedies<br />My method is uncertain<br />It's a mess but it's working<br />And maybe if you tried it out<br />You won't like it when you're crying out<br /><br />Give us something familiar<br />Something similar<br />To what we know already<br />That will keep us steady<br />Steady, steady<br />Steady going nowhere<br /><br />Please please please<br />No more melodies<br />They lack impact, they're petty<br />They've been made up already<br />Please please please<br />No more maladies<br />I'm so tired of crying<br />You'd think I was a siren<br />But me and everybody's on the sad same team and<br />You can hear our sad brain screaming<br /><br />Give us something familiar<br />Something similar<br />To what we know already<br />That will keep us steady<br />Steady, steady, steady, steady<br />Steady going nowhere<br /><br />Please please please<br />No apologies<br />At best they buy you time<br />Until you next step out of line<br />Please please please<br />No more remedies<br />My method is uncertain<br />It's a mess but it's working<br />And maybe if you want to try it out<br />You won't like it when you're crying out<br /><br />Give me something familiar<br />Somethin' similar<br />To what we know already<br />That will keep us steady<br />Steady, steady<br />Steady going nowhere<br /><br />Clubs<br /><a href="http://dapagan.deviantart.com/"><img class="avatar" src="http://a.deviantart.com/avatars/d/a/dapagan.gif" width="50" height="50" alt=":icondapagan:" title="dapagan"/></a><br /><a href="http://the-zodiac-club.deviantart.com/"><img class="avatar" src="http://a.deviantart.com/avatars/t/h/the-zodiac-club.gif" width="50" height="50" alt=":iconthe-zodiac-club:" title="the-zodiac-club"/></a><br /><a href="http://felinefans.deviantart.com/"><img class="avatar" src="http://a.deviantart.com/avatars/f/e/felinefans.gif" width="50" height="50" alt=":iconfelinefans:" title="felinefans"/></a><br /><a href="http://dysmorphics.deviantart.com/"><img class="avatar" src="http://a.deviantart.com/avatars/d/y/dysmorphics.gif" width="50" height="50" alt=":icondysmorphics:" title="dysmorphics"/></a> ]]></description>
                <author>~candyapplesex</author>
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          <item>
                <title>i hate everything about you...why do i love you...</title>
                <link>http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/18169982/</link>
                <guid isPermaLink="true">http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/18169982/</guid>
                <pubDate>Sun, 04 May 2008 18:23:22 PDT</pubDate>
                
                <description><![CDATA[ i'm depressed, no idea why. <br /><br />i started yelling at chris for no reason, i feel bad. <br /><br />i don't know what caused it this time.<br /><br />i want to cut, but i dont do it.<br /><br />i want to runaway.<br /><br />i need an outlet, but i dont know what.<br /><br />i feel like crying, but i'm not.<br /><br />i dont like feeling like this.<br /><br />Clubs<br /><a href="http://dapagan.deviantart.com/"><img class="avatar" src="http://a.deviantart.com/avatars/d/a/dapagan.gif" width="50" height="50" alt=":icondapagan:" title="dapagan"/></a><br /><a href="http://the-zodiac-club.deviantart.com/"><img class="avatar" src="http://a.deviantart.com/avatars/t/h/the-zodiac-club.gif" width="50" height="50" alt=":iconthe-zodiac-club:" title="the-zodiac-club"/></a><br /><a href="http://felinefans.deviantart.com/"><img class="avatar" src="http://a.deviantart.com/avatars/f/e/felinefans.gif" width="50" height="50" alt=":iconfelinefans:" title="felinefans"/></a><br /><a href="http://dysmorphics.deviantart.com/"><img class="avatar" src="http://a.deviantart.com/avatars/d/y/dysmorphics.gif" width="50" height="50" alt=":icondysmorphics:" title="dysmorphics"/></a> ]]></description>
                <author>~candyapplesex</author>
            </item>
          <item>
                <title>sign this petition</title>
                <link>http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/17900594/</link>
                <guid isPermaLink="true">http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/17900594/</guid>
                <pubDate>Thu, 17 Apr 2008 17:43:40 PDT</pubDate>
                
                <description><![CDATA[ a man who claims himself an artist starved a dog to death as art, and is alloud to do it again!! sign this petition to stop him from killing another dog for art!!<br /><br /><a href="http://www.petitiononline.com/ea6gk/petition.html">[link]</a><br /><br />Clubs<br /><a href="http://dapagan.deviantart.com/"><img class="avatar" src="http://a.deviantart.com/avatars/d/a/dapagan.gif" width="50" height="50" alt=":icondapagan:" title="dapagan"/></a><br /><a href="http://the-zodiac-club.deviantart.com/"><img class="avatar" src="http://a.deviantart.com/avatars/t/h/the-zodiac-club.gif" width="50" height="50" alt=":iconthe-zodiac-club:" title="the-zodiac-club"/></a><br /><a href="http://felinefans.deviantart.com/"><img class="avatar" src="http://a.deviantart.com/avatars/f/e/felinefans.gif" width="50" height="50" alt=":iconfelinefans:" title="felinefans"/></a><br /><a href="http://dysmorphics.deviantart.com/"><img class="avatar" src="http://a.deviantart.com/avatars/d/y/dysmorphics.gif" width="50" height="50" alt=":icondysmorphics:" title="dysmorphics"/></a> ]]></description>
                <author>~candyapplesex</author>
            </item>
          <item>
                <title>thoughts...</title>
                <link>http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/17680586/</link>
                <guid isPermaLink="true">http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/17680586/</guid>
                <pubDate>Fri, 04 Apr 2008 09:39:22 PDT</pubDate>
                
                <description><![CDATA[ easter sunday i found out that my mom's blood pressure is around 200 everyday, this means she's on a new diet and needs less stress, so i get to steal jason. this can lead to her death because of our family history in heart problems. my mom has to change her will because jason isn't in it yet, i asked her to make it that after i'm 21 if anything happens to her i want him, and that's only like 13 months away so by the time anything were to happen i'm sure i'll be well over 21. i'm worried because i don't know how i'll cope, but more importantly i don't know how jason will cope.<br /><br />chris and i are planning to move out asap because of his parental problems so anyone needing roommates with 3 cats and a hamster plus the possibility of christina with her critters left me know, i have a feeling tho will end upwill our own place.<br /><br />i'm still looking for a second job. i need car insurence because chris's parents are giving me his dad's car because he got a mini van. i need to pay my bills. i wish i could win the lottery but chances are so slim it's not worth it.<br /><br />Quisitis is sick. we took her to the doctors on tuesday, they think it's either a kidney infection or someother infection. she's on more meds now. <br /><br />my eating habits haven't been great lately. i feel the unhealthiness taking it's toal.<br /><br />well that's it.<br /><br />Clubs<br /><a href="http://dapagan.deviantart.com/"><img class="avatar" src="http://a.deviantart.com/avatars/d/a/dapagan.gif" width="50" height="50" alt=":icondapagan:" title="dapagan"/></a><br /><a href="http://the-zodiac-club.deviantart.com/"><img class="avatar" src="http://a.deviantart.com/avatars/t/h/the-zodiac-club.gif" width="50" height="50" alt=":iconthe-zodiac-club:" title="the-zodiac-club"/></a><br /><a href="http://felinefans.deviantart.com/"><img class="avatar" src="http://a.deviantart.com/avatars/f/e/felinefans.gif" width="50" height="50" alt=":iconfelinefans:" title="felinefans"/></a><br /><a href="http://dysmorphics.deviantart.com/"><img class="avatar" src="http://a.deviantart.com/avatars/d/y/dysmorphics.gif" width="50" height="50" alt=":icondysmorphics:" title="dysmorphics"/></a> ]]></description>
                <author>~candyapplesex</author>
            </item>
          <item>
                <title>5 yrs</title>
                <link>http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/17627075/</link>
                <guid isPermaLink="true">http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/17627075/</guid>
                <pubDate>Tue, 01 Apr 2008 09:25:18 PDT</pubDate>
                
                <description><![CDATA[ today marks the 5th year annivarsary of my nana's death. it makes me sad that my family completely fell apart afterwards and now part of my family doesn't talk to me and i know if she was still alive this wouldn't have happened. i miss her sooo much. i hope i can visit her grave this weekend, leave her a note and some flowers. it's so wierd that's it's been 5 years...<br /><br />Clubs<br /><a href="http://dapagan.deviantart.com/"><img class="avatar" src="http://a.deviantart.com/avatars/herduliek.gif" width="50" height="50" alt=":icondapagan:" title="dapagan"/></a><br /><a href="http://the-zodiac-club.deviantart.com/"><img class="avatar" src="http://a.deviantart.com/avatars/herduliek.gif" width="50" height="50" alt=":iconthe-zodiac-club:" title="the-zodiac-club"/></a><br /><a href="http://felinefans.deviantart.com/"><img class="avatar" src="http://a.deviantart.com/avatars/herduliek.gif" width="50" height="50" alt=":iconfelinefans:" title="felinefans"/></a><br /><a href="http://dysmorphics.deviantart.com/"><img class="avatar" src="http://a.deviantart.com/avatars/herduliek.gif" width="50" height="50" alt=":icondysmorphics:" title="dysmorphics"/></a> ]]></description>
                <author>~candyapplesex</author>
            </item>
          <item>
                <title>feeling fat</title>
                <link>http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/17481060/</link>
                <guid isPermaLink="true">http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/17481060/</guid>
                <pubDate>Sun, 23 Mar 2008 19:09:31 PDT</pubDate>
                
                <description><![CDATA[ i need to eat healthy again<br /><br />Clubs<br /><a href="http://dapagan.deviantart.com/"><img class="avatar" src="http://a.deviantart.com/avatars/d/a/dapagan.gif" width="50" height="50" alt=":icondapagan:" title="dapagan"/></a><br /><a href="http://the-zodiac-club.deviantart.com/"><img class="avatar" src="http://a.deviantart.com/avatars/t/h/the-zodiac-club.gif" width="50" height="50" alt=":iconthe-zodiac-club:" title="the-zodiac-club"/></a><br /><a href="http://felinefans.deviantart.com/"><img class="avatar" src="http://a.deviantart.com/avatars/f/e/felinefans.gif" width="50" height="50" alt=":iconfelinefans:" title="felinefans"/></a><br /><a href="http://dysmorphics.deviantart.com/"><img class="avatar" src="http://a.deviantart.com/avatars/d/y/dysmorphics.gif" width="50" height="50" alt=":icondysmorphics:" title="dysmorphics"/></a> ]]></description>
                <author>~candyapplesex</author>
            </item>
          <item>
                <title>Update</title>
                <link>http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/17394454/</link>
                <guid isPermaLink="true">http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/17394454/</guid>
                <pubDate>Tue, 18 Mar 2008 12:26:17 PDT</pubDate>
                
                <description><![CDATA[ last week i started working at the kohlÂs in flemington. i work from 6am-10am. its not bad acctually.<br /><br />sunday i threw out my back by going thru my stuff in the garage.<br /><br />i currently have a sinus head cold, i want to shove my head in a blender.<br /><br />today i have off and am laying on a heating pad thinking of how to entertain myself.<br /><br />just felt like telling u all i love u (no iÂm not suicidal, i just wanted to let u guys know).<br /><br />Clubs<br /><a href="http://dapagan.deviantart.com/"><img class="avatar" src="http://a.deviantart.com/avatars/d/a/dapagan.gif" width="50" height="50" alt=":icondapagan:" title="dapagan"/></a><br /><a href="http://the-zodiac-club.deviantart.com/"><img class="avatar" src="http://a.deviantart.com/avatars/t/h/the-zodiac-club.gif" width="50" height="50" alt=":iconthe-zodiac-club:" title="the-zodiac-club"/></a><br /><a href="http://felinefans.deviantart.com/"><img class="avatar" src="http://a.deviantart.com/avatars/f/e/felinefans.gif" width="50" height="50" alt=":iconfelinefans:" title="felinefans"/></a> ]]></description>
                <author>~candyapplesex</author>
            </item>
          <item>
                <title>life</title>
                <link>http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/17269653/</link>
                <guid isPermaLink="true">http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/17269653/</guid>
                <pubDate>Mon, 10 Mar 2008 11:21:10 PDT</pubDate>
                
                <description><![CDATA[ i dunno, life has seemed to plato, i can't find a job and i want to go to school for art but i dunno what i want to be. i'm stuck....<br /><br />~song that has been stuck in my head: "elmo" by holly mcnarland~ :<br /><br />I'm still thinking about Elmo <br />Elmo 5 o'clock special <br />I'm still thinking about you <br />A thousand ways to kill you <br />I'm still dreaming in pink <br />Gives me the reason to think <br />When i lay down my head i'm still okay <br />When i lay down my head to go to bed <br /><br />Where do you fit in <br /><br />Didn't say to come in <br />Where the hell have you been <br />I can see you're excited <br />You can tell you're invited <br />Justify your evil ways <br />Make up for lost days <br />Didn't mean to close the door <br />When i threw you to the floor <br />Didn't mean to close the door <br />On my personal whore <br /><br />Where do you fit in <br /><br />You run out of expression <br />You let me make a suggestion <br />You've left a scratch on my face <br />I can see to this day <br />You're no innocent man <br />Come and catch me if you can <br />Didn't have the time of day <br />But i fucked him anyway <br />Didn't have the time of day to play<br /><br />Where do you fit in <br /><br />Where do you fit in <br /><br />I'm still thinking about Elmo <br />Elmo 5 o'clock special <br />I'm still thinking about you <br />A thousand ways to kill you <br />I'm still dreaming in pink <br />Gives me the reason to think <br />When i lay down my head i'm still okay <br />When i lay down my head to go to bed <br /><br />Where do you fit in <br /><br />Where the fuck have you been<br /><br />Hey ho ho (X8)<br /><br />Where do you fit in<br /><br />Cos I'm still thinking about Elmo <br /><br />And where do you fit in<br />And where do you fit in<br />And where do you fit in<br /><br />Hey ho ho (X8)<br /><br />Clubs<br /><a href="http://dapagan.deviantart.com/"><img class="avatar" src="http://a.deviantart.com/avatars/d/a/dapagan.gif" width="50" height="50" alt=":icondapagan:" title="dapagan"/></a><br /><a href="http://the-zodiac-club.deviantart.com/"><img class="avatar" src="http://a.deviantart.com/avatars/t/h/the-zodiac-club.gif" width="50" height="50" alt=":iconthe-zodiac-club:" title="the-zodiac-club"/></a><br /><a href="http://felinefans.deviantart.com/"><img class="avatar" src="http://a.deviantart.com/avatars/f/e/felinefans.gif" width="50" height="50" alt=":iconfelinefans:" title="felinefans"/></a> ]]></description>
                <author>~candyapplesex</author>
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          <item>
                <title>Rocko</title>
                <link>http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/17154826/</link>
                <guid isPermaLink="true">http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/17154826/</guid>
                <pubDate>Sun, 02 Mar 2008 18:58:49 PST</pubDate>
                
                <description><![CDATA[ Rocko Died Yesterday<br /><br />Clubs<br /><a href="http://dapagan.deviantart.com/"><img class="avatar" src="http://a.deviantart.com/avatars/d/a/dapagan.gif" width="50" height="50" alt=":icondapagan:" title="dapagan"/></a><br /><a href="http://the-zodiac-club.deviantart.com/"><img class="avatar" src="http://a.deviantart.com/avatars/t/h/the-zodiac-club.gif" width="50" height="50" alt=":iconthe-zodiac-club:" title="the-zodiac-club"/></a><br /><a href="http://felinefans.deviantart.com/"><img class="avatar" src="http://a.deviantart.com/avatars/f/e/felinefans.gif" width="50" height="50" alt=":iconfelinefans:" title="felinefans"/></a> ]]></description>
                <author>~candyapplesex</author>
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          <item>
                <title>..</title>
                <link>http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/17072252/</link>
                <guid isPermaLink="true">http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/17072252/</guid>
                <pubDate>Tue, 26 Feb 2008 11:31:33 PST</pubDate>
                
                <description><![CDATA[ poke<br /><br />Clubs<br /><a href="http://dapagan.deviantart.com/"><img class="avatar" src="http://a.deviantart.com/avatars/d/a/dapagan.gif" width="50" height="50" alt=":icondapagan:" title="dapagan"/></a><br /><a href="http://the-zodiac-club.deviantart.com/"><img class="avatar" src="http://a.deviantart.com/avatars/t/h/the-zodiac-club.gif" width="50" height="50" alt=":iconthe-zodiac-club:" title="the-zodiac-club"/></a><br /><a href="http://felinefans.deviantart.com/"><img class="avatar" src="http://a.deviantart.com/avatars/f/e/felinefans.gif" width="50" height="50" alt=":iconfelinefans:" title="felinefans"/></a> ]]></description>
                <author>~candyapplesex</author>
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          <item>
                <title>Update</title>
                <link>http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/16978923/</link>
                <guid isPermaLink="true">http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/16978923/</guid>
                <pubDate>Wed, 20 Feb 2008 14:38:26 PST</pubDate>
                
                <description><![CDATA[ i'm trying to get my ass in gear and start painting and drawing more often, but i did go camera crazy on my cats so those will be up tonight.<br /><br />Clubs<br /><a href="http://dapagan.deviantart.com/"><img class="avatar" src="http://a.deviantart.com/avatars/d/a/dapagan.gif" width="50" height="50" alt=":icondapagan:" title="dapagan"/></a><br /><a href="http://the-zodiac-club.deviantart.com/"><img class="avatar" src="http://a.deviantart.com/avatars/t/h/the-zodiac-club.gif" width="50" height="50" alt=":iconthe-zodiac-club:" title="the-zodiac-club"/></a> ]]></description>
                <author>~candyapplesex</author>
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          <item>
                <title>my new site</title>
                <link>http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/15536124/</link>
                <guid isPermaLink="true">http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/15536124/</guid>
                <pubDate>Fri, 16 Nov 2007 16:04:34 PST</pubDate>
                
                <description><![CDATA[ i started a forum for survivors of everything check i out and join. membership it free!<br /><br /><a href="http://survivors101.myfastforum.org/index.php">[link]</a> ]]></description>
                <author>~candyapplesex</author>
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          <item>
                <title>since evryone else sucks...</title>
                <link>http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/14628862/</link>
                <guid isPermaLink="true">http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/14628862/</guid>
                <pubDate>Fri, 14 Sep 2007 10:12:35 PDT</pubDate>
                
                <description><![CDATA[ ....*<a class="u" href="http://catchme-22.deviantart.com/">CatchMe-22</a> gets 10 pieces in my journal!!! these are amazing pieces, bask in the glory!<br /><br /><a href="http://catchme-22.deviantart.com/art/girl-at-the-curry-shack-64855627"><img src="http://tn3-2.deviantart.com/fs21/300W/i/2007/257/f/b/girl_at_the_curry_shack_by_CatchMe_22.jpg" alt="girl at the curry shack" /></a><br />
<a href="http://catchme-22.deviantart.com/art/living-out-of-a-suitcase-63189640"><img src="http://tn3-2.deviantart.com/fs21/300W/i/2007/236/e/1/living_out_of_a_suitcase_by_CatchMe_22.jpg" alt="living out of a suicase" /></a><br />
<a href="http://catchme-22.deviantart.com/art/a-storm-is-brewing-62269531"><img src="http://tn3-2.deviantart.com/fs18/300W/i/2007/226/b/8/a_storm_is_brewing_by_CatchMe_22.jpg" alt="a storm is brewing" /></a><br />
<a href="http://catchme-22.deviantart.com/art/plight-of-africa-60034919"><img src="http://tn3-1.deviantart.com/fs16/300W/i/2007/198/a/c/plight_of_africa_by_CatchMe_22.jpg" alt="plight of africa" /></a><br />
<a href="http://catchme-22.deviantart.com/art/whispers-of-winter-sky-57497586"><img src="http://tn3-2.deviantart.com/fs16/300W/i/2007/164/6/f/whispers_of_winter_sky_by_CatchMe_22.jpg" alt="whispers of winter sky" /></a><br />
<a href="http://catchme-22.deviantart.com/art/three-sisters-54281820"><img src="http://tn3-2.deviantart.com/fs11/300W/i/2007/119/5/3/three_sisters_by_CatchMe_22.jpg" alt="three sisters" /></a><br />
<a href="http://catchme-22.deviantart.com/art/anchor-me-54043398"><img src="http://tn3-1.deviantart.com/fs15/300W/i/2007/116/8/b/anchor_me_by_CatchMe_22.jpg" alt="anchor me" /></a><br />
<a href="http://catchme-22.deviantart.com/art/Fatty-49668851"><img src="http://tn3-2.deviantart.com/fs14/300W/i/2007/057/a/1/itFatty_by_CatchMe_22.jpg" alt="Fatty" /></a><br />
<a href="http://catchme-22.deviantart.com/art/Forgotten-49044525"><img src="http://tn3-2.deviantart.com/fs14/300W/i/2007/048/b/6/Forgotten_by_CatchMe_22.jpg" alt="forgotten" /></a><br />
<a href="http://catchme-22.deviantart.com/art/Emerald-Lakes-46077162"><img src="http://tn3-1.deviantart.com/fs13/300W/i/2007/006/5/e/Emerald_Lakes_by_CatchMe_22.jpg" alt="Emerald Lakes" /></a><br /><br />now maybe next time people will listen lol, i'm kidding i just thought it'd be fun ]]></description>
                <author>~candyapplesex</author>
            </item>
          <item>
                <title>the first 5 people to comment in my journal...</title>
                <link>http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/14536911/</link>
                <guid isPermaLink="true">http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/14536911/</guid>
                <pubDate>Fri, 07 Sep 2007 20:50:11 PDT</pubDate>
                
                <description><![CDATA[ ...Get three deviations featured from their gallery right here on my journal.<br /><br />i found this in <a href="http://agonybliss.deviantart.com/"><img class="avatar" src="http://a.deviantart.com/avatars/a/g/agonybliss.gif" width="50" height="50" alt=":iconagonybliss:" title="agonybliss"/></a> 's journal and thought it was awsome, i'm not feautured there but i'd like to spread this around. <br />
rules are as followed:<br />
if you're featured here, you repost this in your journal, and share the love with your dA friends.<br /><br /> ]]></description>
                <author>~candyapplesex</author>
            </item>
          <item>
                <title>yesterday</title>
                <link>http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/14516394/</link>
                <guid isPermaLink="true">http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/14516394/</guid>
                <pubDate>Thu, 06 Sep 2007 12:51:38 PDT</pubDate>
                
                <description><![CDATA[ he held on for a minuate...<br /><br />i slighty binged yesterday, but there wasn't much variety of food in the house so i ate peanut butter, than his mom came home with food i wanted and i ate more than i should of, i've been sick the past couple of days my sore throat is worse, my glands are swollen, my face is puffy, and my stomach is upset, they are the same simptoms i had after i would purge, but i haven't in over a week, i dunno....<br /><br />...and i calasped ]]></description>
                <author>~candyapplesex</author>
            </item>
          <item>
                <title>death to evil</title>
                <link>http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/14472655/</link>
                <guid isPermaLink="true">http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/14472655/</guid>
                <pubDate>Mon, 03 Sep 2007 13:35:13 PDT</pubDate>
                
                <description><![CDATA[ i killed his hold over me....<br /><br />i took a hammer to my scale today, chris even videoed it. it was fun, i'm free-er<br /><br />.... and i'm winning this battle and soon i'll win the war. ]]></description>
                <author>~candyapplesex</author>
            </item>
          <item>
                <title>cigs vs mia</title>
                <link>http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/14416941/</link>
                <guid isPermaLink="true">http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/14416941/</guid>
                <pubDate>Thu, 30 Aug 2007 20:35:46 PDT</pubDate>
                
                <description><![CDATA[ he killed me she held me while forcing my death to continue....<br /><br />so i need to replace my ed with something to i choose smoking mostly b/c i'm not addicted to cigarettes. when i feel mia has left i will stop smoking easy as pie...i hope....<br /><br />"don't let them see u cry, we are the vikings" ~white oleander ]]></description>
                <author>~candyapplesex</author>
            </item>
          <item>
                <title>thin</title>
                <link>http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/14394659/</link>
                <guid isPermaLink="true">http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/14394659/</guid>
                <pubDate>Wed, 29 Aug 2007 11:58:27 PDT</pubDate>
                
                <description><![CDATA[ i want it so bad i'm ok with death<br /><br />my throat constantly feels like it's cut up and bleeding, my teeth are always in pain, my stomach has been upset, i've been getting frequent headaches, i'm always tired, and always sad....al because on my bulimia but i  want it so bad i dont care if i die, it scares me. i almost lost chris because of it and everyday i have to stop myself just so i dont loose him.. its so hard it'd just be easier to let it happen n die but i love him too much. somedays i feel like purging till my organs come out but i cant, i have to get better, i'm not sure though if i want to for me.<br /><br />i hate myself.... ]]></description>
                <author>~candyapplesex</author>
            </item>
          <item>
                <title>rip hermie</title>
                <link>http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/14294456/</link>
                <guid isPermaLink="true">http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/14294456/</guid>
                <pubDate>Wed, 22 Aug 2007 20:15:20 PDT</pubDate>
                
                <description><![CDATA[ my beloved hermit crab<br /><br />i went to play with hermie today and he was dead.... i burried him with chris<br /><br />he was my little baby ]]></description>
                <author>~candyapplesex</author>
            </item>
          <item>
                <title>stop witchcraft suppression bill</title>
                <link>http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/14180065/</link>
                <guid isPermaLink="true">http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/14180065/</guid>
                <pubDate>Wed, 15 Aug 2007 12:34:36 PDT</pubDate>
                
                <description><![CDATA[ yes this is in south africa but it doesn't mean it cant happen here<br /><br /><a href="http://www.thepetitionsite.com/1/stop-the-witchcraft-suppression-bill">[link]</a><br />
<br />
<a href="http://dapagan.deviantart.com/"><img class="avatar" src="http://a.deviantart.com/avatars/d/a/dapagan.gif" width="50" height="50" alt=":icondapagan:" title="dapagan"/></a><br /><br /> ]]></description>
                <author>~candyapplesex</author>
            </item>
          <item>
                <title>doodle takes dads scissors to her skin</title>
                <link>http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/13933267/</link>
                <guid isPermaLink="true">http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/13933267/</guid>
                <pubDate>Sun, 29 Jul 2007 21:26:34 PDT</pubDate>
                
                <description><![CDATA[ hey baby can u bleed like me<br /><br />yesterday i felt like killing myself - no matter who i lean on i eventually fuck things up, yesterday chris said things word for word of what my mom has told me - stuff i need to work on - stuff i runnaway from - n yesterday i almost did - i almost left everyone would've ran to siren - not that i wouldn't mind - but i would've lost everything including chris, i guess he's one of my strings holding me on - i just been so depressed lately with thoughts of cutting but nothing compares to yesterday - i acctually had a plan of suicide n i was medicated - with out a meds doctor i cant change my dose - with out benifits i cant get a meds doctor for less than 200 a visit because stupid richard hall will only take me if i stop seeing nancy which is complete bullshit - she has other paitients who she her n them - whatever they're assholes - went to planned parenthood they are putting me on a different pill b/c they dont carry mine, but what it's a hell of a lot cheaper - i dont know whats wrong with me right now but i see nancy on wednesday so hopfully she can help me....<br /><br />Avalanche is sullen and too thin<br />
She starves herself to rid herself of sin<br />
And the kick is so divine when she sees bones beneath her skin<br />
And she says:<br />
Hey baby can you bleed like me?<br />
C'mon baby can you bleed like me?<br />
<br />
Chris is all dressed up and acting coy<br />
Painted like a brand new Christmas toy<br />
He's trying to figure out if he's a girl or he's a boy<br />
He says:<br />
Hey baby can you bleed like me?<br />
C'mon baby can you bleed like me?<br />
<br />
Doodle takes dad's scissors to her skin<br />
And when she does relief comes setting in<br />
While she hides the scars she's making underneath her pretty clothes<br />
She sings:<br />
Hey baby can you bleed like me?<br />
C'mon baby can you bleed like me?<br />
<br />
Therapy is Speedie's brand new drug<br />
Dancing with the devil's past has never been too fun<br />
It's better off than trying to take a bullet from a gun<br />
And she cries:<br />
Hey baby can you bleed like me?<br />
C'mon baby can you bleed like me?<br />
<br />
JT gets all fucked up in some karaoke bar<br />
After two drinks he's a loser after three drinks he's a star<br />
Getting all nostalgic as he sings "I Will Survive"<br />
Hey baby can you bleed like me?<br />
C'mon baby can you bleed like me?<br />
Hey baby can you bleed like me?<br />
C'mon baby can you bleed like me?<br />
<br />
You should see my scars<br />
You should see my scars<br />
You should see my scars<br />
You should see my scars<br />
Try to comprehend that which you'll never comprehend<br />
Try to comprehend that which you'll never comprehend<br />
Just try to comprehend that which you'll never comprehend<br />
Try to comprehend that which you'll never comprehend<br />
You should see my scars<br />
You should see my scars ]]></description>
                <author>~candyapplesex</author>
            </item>
          <item>
                <title>yesterday</title>
                <link>http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/13844931/</link>
                <guid isPermaLink="true">http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/13844931/</guid>
                <pubDate>Mon, 23 Jul 2007 10:31:18 PDT</pubDate>
                
                <description><![CDATA[ so yeasterday was interesting, i went to work n about 4 hours in i ended up on the floor in pain, turns out i was dehydrated of course first the er thought i had a cyst, which i also thought, but no i was dyhrated which we started to figure out when the pain slowly went away when they put a saline iv in me, then they gave me a lovely pain killer right in my iv hwich made all the pain go away plus make me a little loopy, so now i'm on meds for a week n i can only drink water which i usually do except for 2days leading up to this i was drinking mainly coffee, which dehydrates the body (i didn't know that), so water n meds yay (insert scarcasm here), so yea that was yesterday<br /><br /> ]]></description>
                <author>~candyapplesex</author>
            </item>
          <item>
                <title>People are strange when you're a stranger</title>
                <link>http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/13800015/</link>
                <guid isPermaLink="true">http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/13800015/</guid>
                <pubDate>Thu, 19 Jul 2007 20:06:23 PDT</pubDate>
                
                <description><![CDATA[ i'm going to being taking some online courses in psychology to become a child psych n maybe even go into art therapy - yes i know i thought about doing this b4 n desided against it - n yes i know i dropped out of reignbow b/c i wasn't happy - but i think this will be better since it'll be on my time - so yea<br />
<br />
 <br />
<br />
People are strange when youre a stranger<br />
Faces look ugly when youre alone<br />
Women seem wicked when youre unwanted<br />
Streets are uneven when youre down<br />
When youre strange<br />
Faces come out of the rain<br />
When youre strange<br />
No one remembers your name<br />
When youre strange <br />
When youre strange<br />
When youre strange<br />
<br />
People are strange when youre a stranger<br />
Faces look ugly when youre alone<br />
Women seem wicked when youre unwanted<br />
Streets are uneven when youre down<br />
<br />
When youre strange<br />
Faces come out of the rain<br />
When youre strange<br />
No one remembers your name<br />
When youre strange <br />
When youre strange<br />
When youre strange<br />
<br />
When youre strange<br />
Faces come out of the rain<br />
When youre strange<br />
No one remembers your name<br />
When youre strange<br />
When youre strange <br />
When youre strange<br /><br /> ]]></description>
                <author>~candyapplesex</author>
            </item>
          <item>
                <title>only the good die young</title>
                <link>http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/13713178/</link>
                <guid isPermaLink="true">http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/13713178/</guid>
                <pubDate>Thu, 12 Jul 2007 20:59:24 PDT</pubDate>
                
                <description><![CDATA[ #17<br />
Shane, only 19<br /><br />a friend died last night, just dropped, they have to do an autopsy, we think it was an overdose, hope not....<br /><br /> ]]></description>
                <author>~candyapplesex</author>
            </item>
          <item>
                <title>bored</title>
                <link>http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/13429704/</link>
                <guid isPermaLink="true">http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/13429704/</guid>
                <pubDate>Thu, 21 Jun 2007 07:47:37 PDT</pubDate>
                
                <description><![CDATA[ just trying out css<br /><br /> ]]></description>
                <author>~candyapplesex</author>
            </item>
          <item>
                <title>"Everything's plastic, we're all gonna die.</title>
                <link>http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/12975743/</link>
                <guid isPermaLink="true">http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/12975743/</guid>
                <pubDate>Wed, 16 May 2007 09:44:07 PDT</pubDate>
                
                <description><![CDATA[ i sit here wondering what to do with my life - i mean its good i'm happy but  thats just it - they say the first 4 years of ur life are crucial that a child with a happy beginning can get thru things better - but like me a child with a bad start has problems with coping n being ok when life gets good - gods i wish someone told me this a long time ago - then maybe i could of dealt better with life - i'm happy truly happy n all i can think of are things are gonna go to shit n my life will turn itself upside down yet again - even in my subconscious i'm skrewed - i keep having dreams every night of my uncle dreams of him finding me - i guess thats why i haven't given my address out to anyone in my family besides my parents - i haven't even put in a change of address for my mail or my license  - i have spurs of over joyous-ness like i lost my first 10 pounds just got 23 to go - i know i could make it go faster the old way n i fight that everyday - i want to cut all the time but i'm afraid of loosing people yet i fear i will lose them anyways - i've come so far but its almost like its not enough - i always see the bad n think that only bad can come of anything even if its something  i'm happy about - its probably the reason i didn't want to graduate high school the reason i jumped to fast at cosmetology school n why i quit - i've stopped smoking yet again b/c i lost my inhaler chris found it which makes me want to start up again i want to be healthy but i want to kill off the pain which my ways of doing that are bad - i dont know why i'm like this n why everytime i go to therapy i'm happy n nothing bothers me yet right afterwards i'm down again - i buy myself thing to make me happy n they do but life just gets in the way of it all somedays i think of ending it all or atleast being hospitalized again but then i'd loose chris even tho my mind likes to keep me on my toes n say that i'll lose him anyways - i love him n my thoughts of losing him instantly go away when i'm in his arms i hate myself most days even tho i know i shouldn't i want to be better n i know i can but i'm attracted to being worse n i dont know why - i am happy i swear i am i dont like to worry people but i cant help it n for that i'm sorry i wish i could be ok with being better but something is stopping me n i dont know why...<br /><br />so thats my rant.... ]]></description>
                <author>~candyapplesex</author>
            </item>
          <item>
                <title>blessed be</title>
                <link>http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/12620134/</link>
                <guid isPermaLink="true">http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/12620134/</guid>
                <pubDate>Mon, 16 Apr 2007 14:37:27 PDT</pubDate>
                
                <description><![CDATA[ <a href="http://dapagan.deviantart.com/"><img class="avatar" src="http://a.deviantart.com/avatars/d/a/dapagan.gif" width="50" height="50" alt="" title="dapagan" /></a><br /><br /> ]]></description>
                <author>~candyapplesex</author>
            </item>
          <item>
                <title>sentancing</title>
                <link>http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/12263559/</link>
                <guid isPermaLink="true">http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/12263559/</guid>
                <pubDate>Tue, 20 Mar 2007 19:32:29 PDT</pubDate>
                
                <description><![CDATA[ so the sentancing was today...<br />
<br />
 he got 6 yrs, he's up for parol in 14 months, he's going to state instead of avanel, he's under megan's law and has to register with most of the sex offender stuff<br />
<br />
 its over but i'm still not dealing well with this, i'm still depressed over it, i should be happy but i'm not<br />
<br />
 i just lost most of my family on my mother's side b/c the dont believe me or choose not too<br />
<br />
 i really feel like cutting, but i'm not going too, even if it gets to the point of using my last resort coping skill<br />
<br />
 i really want my cat right now, maybe i'll be able to go to my mom's this weekend<br />
<br />
 oh, i got a job at walmart, i started this past saturday, i'm a cashier<br /><br /> ]]></description>
                <author>~candyapplesex</author>
            </item>
          <item>
                <title>more on yesterday</title>
                <link>http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/12027872/</link>
                <guid isPermaLink="true">http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/12027872/</guid>
                <pubDate>Fri, 02 Mar 2007 14:31:55 PST</pubDate>
                
                <description><![CDATA[ not only was it cancelled for today but they had re scheduled it for the 9 th w/o telling us n thats why i got the call reschedulling for either the 16th or the 20th - we desided on the 20th in the afternoon so 4 cancellations - i hope theres no more cancellations<br /><br /> ]]></description>
                <author>~candyapplesex</author>
            </item>
          <item>
                <title>i hate him</title>
                <link>http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/12006939/</link>
                <guid isPermaLink="true">http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/12006939/</guid>
                <pubDate>Wed, 28 Feb 2007 21:37:35 PST</pubDate>
                
                <description><![CDATA[ the sentancing has been cancelled again its gonna be rescheduled either the 16th or the 20th - this pisses me off - it's taking too long - this is the 3rd!! cancellation<br /><br /> ]]></description>
                <author>~candyapplesex</author>
            </item>
          <item>
                <title>not much</title>
                <link>http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/11881673/</link>
                <guid isPermaLink="true">http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/11881673/</guid>
                <pubDate>Mon, 19 Feb 2007 12:45:44 PST</pubDate>
                
                <description><![CDATA[ <a href="http://dysmorphics.deviantart.com/"><img class="avatar" src="http://a.deviantart.com/avatars/d/y/dysmorphics.gif" width="50" height="50" alt="" title="dysmorphics" /></a><br /><br /> ]]></description>
                <author>~candyapplesex</author>
            </item>
          <item>
                <title>death</title>
                <link>http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/11841823/</link>
                <guid isPermaLink="true">http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/11841823/</guid>
                <pubDate>Fri, 16 Feb 2007 12:06:33 PST</pubDate>
                
                <description><![CDATA[ my "aunt" debbie's mom died 2day...................<br /><br /> ]]></description>
                <author>~candyapplesex</author>
            </item>
          <item>
                <title> i was happy yesterday for a bit n then i got a ca</title>
                <link>http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/11720763/</link>
                <guid isPermaLink="true">http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/11720763/</guid>
                <pubDate>Wed, 07 Feb 2007 10:09:27 PST</pubDate>
                
                <description><![CDATA[ yes n that call was that the sentancing for my uncle has been moved yet again, to march 2nd ^(^^%$%^&_)(*&*&*%$**%^$^@^*(()*!!!!!!!!!! - n that same day my uncle gets to try n get a 3rd trial %$*&amp<img src="http://e.deviantart.com/emoticons/w/wink.gif" width="15" height="15" alt=";)" title=";) (Wink)" />##@#&*^)(^^&%&amp<img src="http://e.deviantart.com/emoticons/w/wink.gif" width="15" height="15" alt=";)" title=";) (Wink)" />!!!!!!!!!!!!!! - i wish it wouls just happen already!!<br /><br /> ]]></description>
                <author>~candyapplesex</author>
            </item>
          <item>
                <title>artsy</title>
                <link>http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/11708190/</link>
                <guid isPermaLink="true">http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/11708190/</guid>
                <pubDate>Tue, 06 Feb 2007 10:04:13 PST</pubDate>
                
                <description><![CDATA[ i've been in a very artistic mood lately which is awsome b/c these come n go n i'm taking full advantage of it, just put fresh new batteries in my camera, n i've been trying to learn new things thru drawing. so yay i'm happy<br /><br /> ]]></description>
                <author>~candyapplesex</author>
            </item>
          <item>
                <title>pissed</title>
                <link>http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/11529014/</link>
                <guid isPermaLink="true">http://candyapplesex.deviantart.com/journal/11529014/</guid>
                <pubDate>Mon, 22 Jan 2007 11:22:32 PST</pubDate>
                
                <description><![CDATA[ my uncle wants a 3rd trial - it wasn't fair enough for him - the judge gets to deside - i know i dont have much to worry about since the 1st was hung n the 2nd was guilty n the desiding judge is the same judge n he believed me - but still - n i found out thru my dad that someone from my family told her that someone should write a letter asking for a lesser sentance so my mom n my aunt can rekindle their relationship - !!?!! - i'm pissed that my mom didn't tell me this n that i had to hear it from my especially since they've been divorced for 14yrs!!!!!!!! - i havn't been sleeping good latly b/c my uncle has been in all my dreams n now i know that he will be there till this is all over - he doesn't get sentanced untill next month!! i hate it - i just want him gone n it to be over..................................................<br /><br /> ]]></description>
                <author>~candyapplesex</author>
            </item>
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