http://search.deviantart.com/?q=by:cloudelfinulr36&section=today deviantART RSS for by:cloudelfinulr36 en-us Copyright 2009, deviantART.com Wed, 16 Dec 2009 09:39:35 PST deviantART.com http://blogs.law.harvard.edu/tech/rss http://s.deviantart.com/minish/widgets/apple-touch-icon-precomposed.png http://cloudelfinulr36.deviantart.com/journal/27997117/ http://cloudelfinulr36.deviantart.com/journal/27997117/ Tue, 27 Oct 2009 15:19:21 PDT
Just gonna say Happy Halloween in advance.
I"m gonna be a Porceline Doll. My friend is doing my make up. Just bought this sweeet sweet dress.
Gonna go to my first ever Halloween Party. Yes I'm 19 and just now going to my first real party. Say nothing bitches. haha.

I'm pretty stoked. Not gonna lie.
The boy is all freaked cuz there's gonna be drinking and I'm known to be ....er...frisky when drunk but I shan't be drinking...don't feel like getting raped honestly.
And he's all nervy cuz he's not going cuz we're not an anything right now.He'll get over it.

I'm going to look SWEET...I hope.
Gotta go to work with my hair all super curled...like a Shirley Temple honey. haha

Anyway...
Happy Halloween...if anyone reads this you should totally share your Halloween costumes and plans

]]> ~cloudelfinulr36 http://cloudelfinulr36.deviantart.com/journal/27208356/ http://cloudelfinulr36.deviantart.com/journal/27208356/ Mon, 14 Sep 2009 12:25:20 PDT I don't have much stuff to add unfortunately. Journalling's been more my thing as of late, just because I have so many thoughts going around in my head and no one who could really understand. Plus I find journaling to be more cathartic right now than poetry, just because I'm finding poetry to be so damn depressing. And when one is already depressed and not in an angsty sort of way, there's really nothing to say. Every poem would say the same thing just in a different way. For me now when I'm depressed, the world is gray b/c I shut it all out. You can't really write about a world you're not seeing and feelings that you refuse to acknowledge.

I really do want to post up some of the drawings I've done. They're not all that great and none of them are colored cuz I'm naught but a mere outliner, but I would like to put them up. I just need to get a few key pieces of equipment.

Other than that, um, I'm an internet junkie once more! And yeah. lol.

]]> ~cloudelfinulr36 http://cloudelfinulr36.deviantart.com/journal/24597093/ http://cloudelfinulr36.deviantart.com/journal/24597093/ Tue, 05 May 2009 07:24:24 PDT I sorry DA I really do love you!!!!

See what happened was...um...I fell in love.
Yeah. I. Fell. In. Love.
And you want to know the best part?????
HE LOVES ME TOO!!!

Was I not the angsty teen since I was 13???
Yes. And not just angsty; awkward, bookworm, dorky, depressed, ... um, other stuffs? I'll let you be the judge of that.
Anyways, he's been the reason for my disappearance. Seriously, and it may not be very healthy I'll admit, but we haven't left each other's sides for longer than 12 hours except on VERY rare occasions.
Idc. I am so blissfully happy right now. I mean, yeah there are the bumps. We are pretty different people.
He was the party/stereotypical jock in high school, running through girls, drinking every night, being an ass, fighting, doing drugs...
And I was...well, me. And we know how that was...lol

You may well ask, Oh Fabulous Nicole! Why are you with such a person?
Well, curious reader. He's not that person anymore. No I didn't "change" him. Jeezeus. I am fairly delusional, but not THAT bad! He had fixed himself up before we met. I mean, he still needed a few tweaks and I did try to do that....But obviously that didn't work, as soon as I let off though, he came to it himself.

He's so adorable. He's a dork. He's so cute (in the personality kinda way). He's sweet. He cares for me when I'm sick or depressed or stressed. If I need to cry on his shoulder, he holds me instead, even though my leaky tear ducts scare the shit out him.

I think I've left you DA for a good person.
Well, I know he's a good person...that is actually the one thing about him I will change, his self image. His father is a real fuckface. My baby is a good person. He's made some mistakes, but he's not a fuckup. I have to convince him of this.

Anyway. We've been together for 6 months on Thursday. And I don't think I have ever been happier.

Also...I have a tattoo.
I'll post pics as soon as I find my camera.

You guys are great.
I missed you all immensely...


And that was my love rant on my lovey

]]> ~cloudelfinulr36 http://cloudelfinulr36.deviantart.com/journal/20544998/ http://cloudelfinulr36.deviantart.com/journal/20544998/ Wed, 17 Sep 2008 20:56:37 PDT First off, it's a Panic at the Disco lyric, and I'm going to their concert in a MONTH BITCHES!!
Second, it's related to the song Cookie Jar by Gym Class Heroes, in their new album, The Quilt. AWESOME!! I bought it by the way. LOVE IT!
I love Gym Class Heroes! Entertainment Weekly can stuff it.

Plus, it also kinda relates to my previous post.
I wasn't fibbing, but I've decided to pretend that post never happened.
I love my deviant community. Even if they don't always show their love back...I know they still love me.
But it doesn't matter.
I'm too attatched to this site. I believe I qualify as being a "long-time deviant" or whatever. DA and I, we like this: Chyeah. Suck that.

I should be sleeping.
I've been rather sleep deprived for the past two weeks and we have no coffee until mom goes to the store...whenever she deigns to do that. I need stimulants man :stimulate:
Hmm...
I'm back to not having a car.
It seems Fate wanted a good laugh, so she gave me a car, let me enjoy it for the whole of ONE week, then took it away from me.
Fate, you are a most capricious mistress, just give me my One Sweet Love and I'll be able to forgive you.

Yeah...I've come to semi-terms with my spiritual status in that I've discovered I have no spiritual status. I still feel the duality that Christian exhalt, but not in terms of "soul" and "body". More like, "self" and "vassal". "Vassal" is my word tonight isn't it? It would be.
I must always have a word of the night mustn't I?
Hay-suse.

I don't really have much to say.
I love Gym Class Heroes.
I'm gonna see PatD in concert!
I'm a heathen.
I'm not leaving DA because I loves you guys and I don't wanna leave sounding like a selfish, whiny bitch, because all in all, that's what I sounded like... yesh...I'm ashamed.
I feel right sheepish and if there were an emoticon for that I would put it right on up here, but, alas.

It's almost eleven and I need to brush the teefers and go to bed.
Night loves.

]]> ~cloudelfinulr36 http://cloudelfinulr36.deviantart.com/journal/20291532/ http://cloudelfinulr36.deviantart.com/journal/20291532/ Tue, 02 Sep 2008 14:25:04 PDT And I've really been thinking about this for some time now.
It may sound a bit vain...and maybe even whiny but I don't really care...and I'm actually not trying to sound whiny. At least, I don't feel whiny.

But I think I'm gonna deactivate my account.
After I take all my poems and put them on my computer. I don't think I have some of these in written form.
Some of them truly do need to be destroyed, but I suppose I should keep them as a record of my teenage years...Neh...who knows.

Not that many of you are extensively freaking out of sobbing or anything. I actually doubt many people will even read this, much less care, but I'm going to explain my decision all the same.

Number one, and this is prolly the most prominant reason:
People aren't really big on reading poetry. Y'all are way more into art. And I completely understand this. As a "poet", and I use that term merely for lack of a better term because I don't see myself as a poet, and I'm definately not an "aspiring poet", but as a poet, you would think I would sympathize with others dealing with my plight, but even I can't. Poetry is just not something I go online to read. I like writing it when the fancy strikes me, but I'm not so hot on reading it. Which kinda leads me to the next reason

Number two:
The whole people not reading my poetry thing has gone on since the beginning really, it was never anything new, but that was ok with me really, because I liked to look at the art. Only, now the art's not really gripping me anymore. It's nothing against you guys. You're art is still and prolly always will be amazing. It's just, this was kind of a phase in my life that I'm kinda growing out of I think. It happens. We get older, we mature. Things that were at the peak of our interest when we were this old barely even register as entertaining when we're this age. I think i'm kinda at that stage.

Another reason, has to do with my sporadic internet availability throughout my membership. Whenever I developed an e-friend and we got close and chatty and such, I'd have this long three month break and all that would go away. It was a little frustrating, but not something that really bothered me. The thing about this though is that I never really developed any bonds with the other users here, so there's nothing really tying me down to the site what with reasons one and two clanking about in my head.


Now, I said that I need to get my poems off the site before I shut it down...due to this and my extremely lazy-procrastinatory personality, knowing me it'll be like, six months before I actually go through with this...and who knows, maybe by then, I'll have changed my mind.

But for now, I just kinda wanted to lay that out there.

Not, like I said before, many of you guys care...but I don't want anyone who may be curious (unlikely) to have me leave seemingly without rhyme or reason and go, WTF? so...there it is...again.

]]> ~cloudelfinulr36 http://cloudelfinulr36.deviantart.com/journal/19803884/ http://cloudelfinulr36.deviantart.com/journal/19803884/ Wed, 06 Aug 2008 07:16:52 PDT Don't look at me like I'm a derranged and obsessed fan...I'm not crazy. I'm not. (I just quoted!!!) That opening night record money amount...I was a part of that!! Opening weekend. I was a part of that.
Yeah.

But the cool thing is, I only paid to see the movie once. My friend paid for opening night. My neighbor wanted to take me out on a date...except he was very careful to say that is wasn't a date, and he paid for me and my little brother for the second day of it's opening. I only went the third time because my friend's sister still hadn't seen it and I figured I should finally take some shit outta my own pocket.



So I have a job now...I don't know if I've mentioned this. Prolly not.
I officially room service and backwait. It's not the easiest job, and it's tiring...like EXHAUSTING. But I enjoy it. I like working. I plus it's like a paid workout on busy days. I can live with that. I need to lose some summer fat anyway..lol
so.



Breaking Dawn.
I got it.
I didn't go to the party. I was drugged up that night. lol....seriously, I was so fucking fucked up...Not illegal substances. Jesus you guys don't know me at all.
I'm on muscle relaxers and painkillers right now. Apparantly I'm seriously stressed out...physically.
I keep telling people, my body and I are two seperate entities...like in The Host...and now I can say it's true. I am not even the slightest bit stressed emotionally, but physically...well. It's not pretty or comfy for that matter.
But yeah. Friday night??? yeah. I was out. So I missed the party. I wasn't gonna go, but Carena went with her mom, cuz her MOM reads the books. Carena doesn't. Her MOM does. Yeah. So she called and was all, wanna come, but all I managed to get out of my mouth was "mmmhhmmm nehhmmmhekm".



so.
Sunday.
Four days.
Know what that means???

I'M 18 BITCHES!!!
Aboot time too eh?
lol

That's all I got for now.


***********************edit*******************************

So I totally forgot something important until just now!!
I don't know if anyone is familiar with the Disney reality show, High School Musical: Get in the Picture...Maybe you are. Maybe you're not.
If you are, then you know of the Lincoln NE kid. Ether Saure. My neighbor.
Yeah bitches that's right. Ether. Amazing Ether singer of The Remedy and others...Ether. My neighbor.
What now???

Yeah.


I only watch that show for him.
It pisses me off when everyone nags at him for not talking and whatever...shut up bitches!!
He's not an annoying attention whore, but he's still uber talented. Get off his back.

Just thought I'd lay that out there.

I'm done now

]]> ~cloudelfinulr36 http://cloudelfinulr36.deviantart.com/journal/19269849/ http://cloudelfinulr36.deviantart.com/journal/19269849/ Tue, 08 Jul 2008 08:54:48 PDT Anyway, now that I'm out of school, I feel confident enough to go back and look at my past writings for class and I actually like some of them, crazy as that sounds. Many of them aren't even that bad. I just never felt like posting them.
But yeah.

I wonder if anything'll get read though because I just have a bunch of essays and narratives...

Oh well.
I'm proud of them so I'm going to post them.
If I wanted pageviews I wouldn't be here...I don't get them anyway so...

Just an update on stuff to be coming in.

Otherwise, there's not much else going on. I start school on August 25, turn 18 August 10, and get Breaking Dawn August 2. yeah, I read Twilight, I'm just not obsessed like the rest of the teenage population. Although I have developed an affinity for the name Edward...lol.
Still getting up at the crack of dawn to take my brother to his stuffs, still sharing cars, still not leaving the house, and (as previously stated) still jobless.

However my music has grown exponentially. That makes me happy. I music.
It makes me happy.

So.
That's it.
much loves to all. *blows kiss*

]]> ~cloudelfinulr36 http://cloudelfinulr36.deviantart.com/journal/18868592/ http://cloudelfinulr36.deviantart.com/journal/18868592/ Mon, 16 Jun 2008 08:06:47 PDT
Saying "naught" "fondness" and even Jane Austen-isms, though I believe she's 18th century...NO...she's not THAT old...she was early 19th century.
Anyhow, I guess it makes since as I've found myself reading quite a bit of Miss Austen. I love her. And the words she uses. Beautiful.

SO...
About my hiatus.

Nothing much to be said that hasn't been said before I guess.

BUT.

As I recieved a LAPTOP(choir of angels sing in background)for graduation (yes that was 3(?) weeks ago, I'm comp retarded and didn't know how to get online until...last night. *cough cough* LAUGHERS SHALL PERISH!!!) so I really shouldn't have any excuse for not getting on...unless my brothers decided to play online for 40 thousand effing hours again...bitches. I don't have a wireless router yet, so I'm confined to the living room floor with my loverly.

So sad and pathetic news:
I still don't have a working vehicle.
I know you are all extremely confused because hadn't I already a working car? (those of you questioning this remember darling Jerry) Yes, I had a car. Darling Jerry was me beautiful black 89 Honda Prelude. Turns out cars are like horses, they break a leg and ya gotta put em down. Well, I didn't have to get rid of my car, but it woulda cost too much to fix the broken axle.
So I currently have a new car, but it needs a trannie...that we have but aren't knowledgable enough to install, so we need to take it to a shop but have no moneys for that.

Oh, speaking of moneys:
I need a job.

Suggestions anyone?

]]> ~cloudelfinulr36 http://cloudelfinulr36.deviantart.com/journal/17399498/ http://cloudelfinulr36.deviantart.com/journal/17399498/ Tue, 18 Mar 2008 17:37:40 PDT I've decided to give up this semester. Yep you heard it. I. Give. Up.

It's just too fucking much.
I need to start over.
Not that I really believe that a fresh start will change anything, but I'm quite practiced in the art of delusion, so we'll see how this pans out.

(by the way, prepare yourselves for and explosion of atomic proportions)
Spring Break starts Friday. How I plan to spend it:
Reading.
Movies.
Homework (maybe)

Good news!!!

I am officially a student at the University of Nebraska Lincoln!!!


Bad news...or rather, old news:

I have yet-again-nothing-new-yadda-yadda forsaken you deviantArt. The only site on this World Wide Web where I felt I truly belonged. Well, not really...but you know. It is certainly my most favorite website. So why do I continue to neglict it???
The tootsie-pop mystery of the century...well, not really.
The reason why I havn't been on is because I was absent for like, 3 weeks, and then computer time was available again, but I came on and my deviations had built up again. Not having the time to answer them all and not knowing when the next computer visit was gonna be, I decided to leave....and not come back on for 3 months. Yes guilt and shame had me running with my tail between my legs.
I'm not exactly one to confront her problems. It's a weakness, I own up to it, realize it is there, and do not promise to do a damn thing about it.
You get used to it.
Or perish!! *insert evil laugh*


K, I think I have entertained my non audience with my novella for long enough...
toodles.

]]> ~cloudelfinulr36 http://cloudelfinulr36.deviantart.com/journal/14974052/ http://cloudelfinulr36.deviantart.com/journal/14974052/ Mon, 08 Oct 2007 16:35:34 PDT Well...
What?

Hm, I believe I am having troubles starting this journal. Sadness. I could always start with what I should be doing I guess.

So. I should be doing an essay for english that was due...oh uh...2 weeks ago? Yeah. Hnhn...I've been coming to my g-ma's for the past 2 weeks to "work" on it. Yeah. So.

I just got over this assholey cold/flu/illness/shit thingo. Like all last week, I was a zombie coughing up some nastyass shit. I went days without smiling. That my friends is painful. Hard core. But on top of the feeling like shitness and exhaustion and coughing so hard I thought my ribs and collarbones would burst from my skin (VERY PAINFUL), I also ate like next to nothing for like, 3-4 day-ish. Sommin like that. Yeah. Shit-y. But the worst thing is, is that now that I feel not sick anymore...I'm stuffing my face. Grr.

Yep.

Bitchy.

Oh and I am lavishing in my swearing. Last week, aside from being sick as fuck and wanting to cry everytime I coughed (which pretty much would have amounted to incessant crying), I made a deal with a few of my friends in my physics class to NOT cuss the whole week.
Yeah. Right. That went off well. *nods* NOT! I barely made it through the period. However I think I went almost all day Friday w/o swearing, but I could have been swearing w/o realizing it. I have been known to do that. But mostly I think it was because I was so shitty that I simply didn't feel like talking the whole day. I'm still kinda like that right now. but yeah.

Hm...

I do have more poems to post. They're just. Not here. With me. Ahem.
Yeah, I'll get on that. Maybe.
*cough cough*
Yeah.

I think I'm done. I need to finish feeding my internet addiction so that I can actually complete my assignment. *laughs*
I seriously doubt that will happen, but hey, a girl can dream right?

]]> ~cloudelfinulr36 http://cloudelfinulr36.deviantart.com/journal/14775338/ http://cloudelfinulr36.deviantart.com/journal/14775338/ Mon, 24 Sep 2007 16:26:05 PDT
I have in fact written some poems
*cheers*
Some really good ones I think
But, unfortunately, I brought meself the wrong notebook to the g-mas, thus rendering meself incabable of submitting my wondrous poems of delight.

Yes, yes, I know it's tragic. I'm sad, you're sad, everyone is sad. It's just an entire website full of sad deviants.

shall we take this moment to cry? I think so.


Ok, moment's over.

That's about all I believe.

But you wait, they're going to be FABULOUS!
Simply, fabulous.

Well maybe not FABULOUS fabulous, but as close to fabulous as I get. You know how I do.

Luvs all!

]]> ~cloudelfinulr36 http://cloudelfinulr36.deviantart.com/journal/14690387/ http://cloudelfinulr36.deviantart.com/journal/14690387/ Tue, 18 Sep 2007 16:29:50 PDT So, I've become an avid tea drinker on the weekdays. Partly because I spend most of the week either at school or at my grandma's house doing homework or *cough* "doing homework." Tea is like all there is to drink up in here at the G-ma's but most of it's decaffinated which, or course completely defeats the purpose of drinking tea. Duh. So, I have to drink this English tea, "Earl Grey" I think it is, I don't know, but it has this really weird flavor, and it gets weirder when it's gotten cold. I just finished it and the oddest combination of flavors entertained my mouth. The cold tea tasted like parsley, with an after taste of rubber, you know the taste a balloon has when you chew on it. Now, I don't know for sure, I mean, it's not like I'm so brilliant tea person or whatever, but, should tea taste like parsley and rubber? I don't know. But if I want my fix, I'm stuck with it, cuz it's the only kinda tea mis abuelos have that isn't decaffinated.

Oh, right, so about the whole not being on devART for, like, eternity...yeah *ahem* I have reasons and this time my they're not nearly as evil as the last times (key word: nearly).
Reasons:
1) Last school year, I was wrapped up in my networking, but I grew outta that around May-ish, so I'm not such a mySpace/Facebook freak...actually I'm not even on as much any more.
2) So, you know how I'm only on when I have homework because I don't have a computer so I have to come over here (to the G-ma's) to do it? Yeah, well, see the thing about summer vacation is I don't have any homework! No homework=no computer time for Nicoley! Sad I know.

I do apologize for not looking at all the deviations I got during my absense. I felt very bad about that, but I had like, 800 and there was no way I'd have been able to look at them all, so I had to get rid of them. I am truly sorry about that. *shame*

In more current news...

I did not have to get my wisdom teeth pulled today. My mom scared me shitless yesterday when she told me I was going to the dentist b/c my wisdom tooth was hurting like a BITCH! All weekend my jaw felt like someone had punched it...like, a brass knuckles wielding punch. I didn't fall asleep for hours on sunday cuz that damn tooth gave me such a headache. And yesterday was sooo terrible.
So, with all that, you'd think I'd want them to yank the little beasties. No! It's not hurting today, and so long as I don't anger it, it won't hurt again for another few months or so, so there is no need for Mr. Man to take his sexy little scalple to my precious speaking organ (mouth). Plus my mom was going on and on about how he was prolly gonna take all my poor wisdom teeth, even though I only have ONE poking through. What the fucking fuck? So, I spent the whole day (well half of it) freaking out at school cuz I thought Mr. Dentist was gonna yank all my teeth out. Dammit mom. She does this to me all the time. It's like she gets some sick pleasure in watching me freak out. Grr.

So, my 17 birthday...
Definately not as painful as the 16th, I got no bruises. Actually I didn't get any spankings at all, which was really wierd given my friends' and family's love of bum smacking. But I was not complaining. I don't remember exactly what I did, I know it wasn't very exciting, but that's fine with me, my life at the time really didn't need any excitement. I was just content to laze about in a stupor of bordom and depression. Well, not really, but I still didn't need any excitement b/c once my people high wears off, my depression usually kicks me harder. So, that was cool.

Hmm...school?
Yes, well, I must say I am soo much happier since school has started. The monotony of it drove me insane at first, but once classes started to get going it got better, and it actually pushed me out of my depression, it just took 3/4 weeks. But I'm sure the whole school liking thing has a lot to do with the fact that since I'm a senior, I'm taking mostly electives. so, that rocks.

I'm gonna finish here, even though there is more to say, I'll get up on that later though, I think this entry is long enough.

]]> ~cloudelfinulr36 http://cloudelfinulr36.deviantart.com/journal/9826043/ http://cloudelfinulr36.deviantart.com/journal/9826043/ Wed, 23 Aug 2006 10:14:49 PDT
Yes the newly turned 16 year old was to get the 16 spanks but not from one of her closest friends but from three of them.

After the horrid deed was done with much laughter and guffahing from the neighbors across the street the girl thought w/o much thought to the thinking of the thought *I bet I'll have bruises* as she sat down on her tender tush.

The next day after all of her loving friends had departed the newly 16 year old girl went to take a shower. Upon undressing herself she saw out of the corner of her eye a mark she had never laid eyes upon on her bum. Upon further inspection she realized that she had (yes she did) bruises on her bum!

the end
p.s. this is a true story... ]]> ~cloudelfinulr36 http://cloudelfinulr36.deviantart.com/journal/9423567/ http://cloudelfinulr36.deviantart.com/journal/9423567/ Wed, 19 Jul 2006 06:50:49 PDT AHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!

It was sooooo awesome!!!!!!
I loved it
I love Jack Sparrow
I love Will Turner

I HATE Kiera Knightly
That lucky BITCH!!!
She gets to kiss Orlando Bloom and as if that wasn't enough...She goes and kisses Johnny Depp!!!
what the fuck???

damn whore!

oh well last night was awesome, even if I did getmy finger rolled up in a car window...don't ask. ]]> ~cloudelfinulr36 http://cloudelfinulr36.deviantart.com/journal/9346588/ http://cloudelfinulr36.deviantart.com/journal/9346588/ Tue, 11 Jul 2006 18:20:57 PDT (pssst that means it's good news for you too)

So I'm pretty sure I told you guys about the sexy poem that I wrote right? Well if I didn't; I wrote this awesome poem and I really wanted to submit it, but for once in my miserable life I wanted to submit a polished poem, so I sent it to my english teacher (yes, I emailed my english teacher, in the summer) well she just mailed it back to me with suggestions for my revising it and as soon as I do that, i will submit, but I am sooo HAPPY!!!
So once I find time in my "busy" schedule to edit my sexy poem, I shall, and then I'll submit and there will be happiness drinks all around!!!
Yay! ]]> ~cloudelfinulr36 http://cloudelfinulr36.deviantart.com/journal/9278212/ http://cloudelfinulr36.deviantart.com/journal/9278212/ Wed, 05 Jul 2006 06:01:16 PDT I have 84 messages to answer/read...Oh well I'll get over it I guess

Anyway I went on "vacation" this weekend...It waasn't anything spectacular or anything...We just went around cornland a bit andsaw a bunch of stuffs
Nebraska really has nothing to offer and the damn radio and whatnot is all "Why go on vacation if you're just driving everywhere? Vacation in Nebraska...you're own state!"
Yeah too bad that there's nothing to do in my own state! All there is in NE is cornfields, cows, a few horses, and fricken pioneer museums. I hate pioneer crap...don't get me wrong though, I had fun, and the museums weren't all that bad; they just don't get my boat a floating.

Well in more complain worthy news...We went to a water park yesterday and I was the only one to not get sunscreen on and I didn't think anything of b/c I havn't had an actual sunburn in like two years so I was just like whatever...
Yeah I got home/back from Seward and that's when it set in...My whole face is red along with my back, neck, upper arms, and shoulders! It even hurts to smile.
I love to smile!!! Also, and this is horrid...I can't even scrunch my nose when I smile b/c it hurts to...
Oh yeah and then when I got back...I ran across the street withmy dog and tried to jump over my neighbors garden and my dog tripped and so you can imagine
I fell, in front of all these people, (forth of july, family time) bruised the BOTTOM of my foot, (i didn't know it was possible to do that) ripped my pants, and scraped up my knee...Yep that was my weekend

Well I'm off to check all these messages and avoid my mom all day, so happy late forth and such

------------------------------------------------------------

Clubs of myne!:
]]> ~cloudelfinulr36 http://cloudelfinulr36.deviantart.com/journal/9225863/ http://cloudelfinulr36.deviantart.com/journal/9225863/ Fri, 30 Jun 2006 09:19:30 PDT
I'm NOT LIKE EVERYONE ELSE, so I MUST be a loser.

I SPEAK MY MIND, so I MUST be a bitch.

I'm YOUNG, so I MUST be naive.

I WEAR BLACK, so I MUST be a goth.

I'm a WHITE GIRL, so I MUST be a nagging, steal-your-money kind of girlfriend.

I'm ITALIAN, so I must have a big peter.

I GOT A CAR FOR MY BIRTHDAY, so I MUST be a spoiled brat.

I'm PRETTY, so I MUST not be a virgin.

I HAVE STRAIGHT A'S, so I MUST have no social life.

I'm INTO THEATER ART, so I MUST be a homosexual.

I HAVE A BUNCH OF GUY FRIENDS, so I MUST be fucking them all.

I HAVE A BUNCH OF GIRLS WHO ARE FRIENDS, so I MUST be gay.

I WEAR WHAT I WANT, so I MUST be a poser.

I hang out with GAYS, so I MUST be GAY TOO.

I'm a VIRGIN, so I MUST be a prude.

I'm a FEMALE GAMER, so I MUST be ugly or crazy.

I'm SKINNY, so I MUST be anorexic.

I dont like the SUN, so I MUST be albino.

I have a lot of FRIENDS, so I MUST love to drink and party.
========================================

Well I think I have a lot of friends and I'm not trying to be concieted with the pretty one, cuz i don't think that I am, but I've been told I was so...whatev
Also I don't get straight a's but, it's close
Oh, it's still kinda important for you guys to read my previous journal if you haven't though, it's kinda sorta important so, if you would...I'd apprieciate it.
Thanks

========================================



========================================

[url=[link]
[img][link]
[/url] ]]> ~cloudelfinulr36 http://cloudelfinulr36.deviantart.com/journal/9219314/ http://cloudelfinulr36.deviantart.com/journal/9219314/ Thu, 29 Jun 2006 09:30:29 PDT I was like pissy and what not!!

Anyway, basically I was talking about me and my muse

See my muse went on vacation so I was stranded in a sea of no inspiration; well my muse returned to me and we wept in joy together as only a muse and a person can. Then my muse and I had a loverly talk which was mainly me drawing...Yes! Drawing!!! I CAN'T DRAW!! but the great thing about that is my drawings aren't have bad...however my muse didn't bring any poetic inspiration which sucks for all of you,b/c I don't have a scanner or any type of art program that would fix up my pictures.

So the general concensus of this journal (I stole brandi's phrase "lub ya")
is that I have been working on stuff, you all just can't see it
Lo Siento

But on good news for me; I finally broke up with my boyfriend..and I got rid of my guilt last night with a sexy poem...ok so I have one sexy poem for you to read...however, I'm not submitting it until my english teacher tells me what i need to fix in it...I want to submit a polished piece of literature for once in my life.

Sorry it's so long but you all love me, so you'll forgive me. ]]> ~cloudelfinulr36 http://cloudelfinulr36.deviantart.com/journal/9139574/ http://cloudelfinulr36.deviantart.com/journal/9139574/ Wed, 21 Jun 2006 16:36:27 PDT It's supposed to be a wilting flower so yeah...

I have been on dA all damn day and my neck and shoulders are in mundo pain from sitting at the damn computer all day...

Also I've decided to break up with my bf b/c it's just not there...If you've been going out for two weeks and you still feel nothing more than you did on the first day then it's time to call it quits you know... plus I was thinking of doing this like ages ago, so that is also not a good sign. Also he is a terrible kisser...I'm no kissing expert but if all guys kiss like that, then I'm never kissing again...That was a wasted first kiss let me tell you...Which is another reason for dumping him, if you can't kiss a guy and feel anything, then it's wasted time...

I'm gonna submit something soon too, I just don't know when...so yeah...

Oh and another thing, I am never starting a thread/forum thingo ever again! omg I'm still getting like fifty comments a day...granted it is fairly new,but that's not the point! The point is,I don't have time to comment on people's comments!

Also, my mother has been making comments on how tired I am all the time, because I'm tired all the time, well this problem arose when I started dating Dylan, so, I think that that would be another excellent reason to dump him, because I can't get a good nights sleep because i'm freaking out over him constantly because I wasn't sure about how I felt about him... I mean my hormones are saying one thing but everything else is screaming the opposite...And I mean EVERYTHING else so yeah...

this is a really long post, sorry ^-^ ]]> ~cloudelfinulr36 http://cloudelfinulr36.deviantart.com/journal/9117839/ http://cloudelfinulr36.deviantart.com/journal/9117839/ Mon, 19 Jun 2006 16:47:38 PDT
This is a test to see who's paying attention. It serves to
eliminate people who are desperately trying to add "friends"
like its a popularity contest in High School. This is a test to
see how many people in my friends list actually pay attention
to me. Copy and repost in your own journal. Lets see who the
true friends are and I think I know who you are...repost this
if you are a friend.. if you don't, you get deleted...don't
reply...just copy and paste this in a new journal as "Fake
Friends".


Friends:
FRIENDS: Never ask for food.
REAL FRIENDS: are the reason you have no food.

FRIENDS: Call your parents Mr/Mrs
REAL FRIENDS: Call your parents DAD/MOM

FRIENDS: bail you out of jail and tell you what you did was wrong.
REAL FRIENDS: Would sit next to you sayin "Damn ... we fucked up ... but that shit was fun!"

FRIENDS:never seen you cry.
REAL FRIENDS: cry with you

FRIENDS: Borrow your stuff for a few days then give it back.
REAL FRIENDS: keep your shit so long they forget its yours. (I need to tell this to megan....she just got back something that ive had for over two years i think)

FRIENDS: know a few things about you.
REAL FRIENDS: Could write a book about you with direct quotes from you.

FRIENDS: Will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing.
REAL FRIENDS: Will kick the whole crowds ass that left you.

FRIENDS: Would knock on your front door.
REAL FRIENDS:Walk right in and say "I'M HOME!"

FRIENDS: Are for awhile.
REAL FRIENDS: Are for life.

FRIENDS: Will take your drink away when they think you've had enough.
REAL FRIENDS:Will look at you stumbling all over the place and say "Bitch drink the rest of that you know we don't waste."

FRIENDS: will talk shit to the person who talks shit about you.
REAL FRIENDS: Will knock them the fuck out

FRIENDS: help you up when you fall down
REAL FRIENDS: laugh at you and push you back down

FRIENDS: Would ignore this
REAL FRIENDS: Will repost it ]]> ~cloudelfinulr36 http://cloudelfinulr36.deviantart.com/journal/9016394/ http://cloudelfinulr36.deviantart.com/journal/9016394/ Fri, 09 Jun 2006 08:16:43 PDT Well he's currantly in Missouri for a football camp and for that I hate him. Also, he didn't wake me up this morning like I told him to and for that I'll beat him up later, like when he gets home on Sunday.

Well thanks to a new found happiness maybe I'll have some inspiration so I'm not continuously submitting old stuffs. Well I'll get back to you all on that laters so ta ta!
Also I love my Dylan! ]]> ~cloudelfinulr36 http://cloudelfinulr36.deviantart.com/journal/8851397/ http://cloudelfinulr36.deviantart.com/journal/8851397/ Tue, 23 May 2006 15:58:41 PDT
Ok so I'm trying to get back into the deviantart grove which should be made easier now that we have INTERNET!!! *halleluha* (angels were just singing) And if my getting up and 5:45 in the morning to get ready for school really early so I can sneak online to check watches, and submit but end up haveing to wait a half hour for mommy to leave so I can get on proves nothing to you ungrateful, unsexy, and unworthy of my....poemy, sexy, worthy goodness (yeah) But for thoses of you who do find it good enough...good for you and you're all sexy!

Things to know....

My new word is sexy! so instead of saying cool...I'm saying sexy, so don't freak out if on your pics or whatever I'm "that is so sexy, YOU are so sexy" Ok, cuz i'm not some internet perv who calls people sexy so yeah...

also I speak in spanglish and I can hardly spell in english so my spanish spelling isn't exactly spankalishous at the moment either, also, there was other shit I wanted to say but forgot again....well if you see a sentence on you comments that you don't understand, it's spanish, and don't worry it'll be good comments cuz if I'm going to have the joy of insulting anyone, I'm gonna do it in a language they can understand so yeah....

also the stuff that will be coming in is from my poetry unit in english class and it's mostly freeform, which means that it DOESN'T rhyme and isn't supposed to rhyme so yeah.
also... I have to go to school so toodlely oodley ]]> ~cloudelfinulr36 http://cloudelfinulr36.deviantart.com/journal/8798554/ http://cloudelfinulr36.deviantart.com/journal/8798554/ Wed, 17 May 2006 13:43:54 PDT ~cloudelfinulr36 http://cloudelfinulr36.deviantart.com/journal/8521556/ http://cloudelfinulr36.deviantart.com/journal/8521556/ Wed, 19 Apr 2006 14:02:00 PDT
Also, i have some stuff i would like to post soon, i don't know how soon soon is but it'll be their. Most likely when we get a computer, that should happen in like a fe weeks but we're not getting tht internet until prolly summertime I'm thinking but then again, I can't be sure so just bare with me here kk? good. Uhhh....I don't really journal here anymore b/c i have a xanga, (i think i've already said that) and a MySpace (that i don't use) so I really don't journal, I haven't even journaled on my xanga for like a month I think so once again, bare with me ok? k.

not much else to say so toodles!

Oh and I had over 300 messages and some were from October! funny huh? ]]> ~cloudelfinulr36 http://cloudelfinulr36.deviantart.com/journal/7896749/ http://cloudelfinulr36.deviantart.com/journal/7896749/ Tue, 14 Feb 2006 14:58:10 PST
bye all and i love to death! ]]> ~cloudelfinulr36 http://cloudelfinulr36.deviantart.com/journal/6724652/ http://cloudelfinulr36.deviantart.com/journal/6724652/ Sun, 09 Oct 2005 20:23:49 PDT
granted i'm still behind, on some people's stuff, but they don't notice cuz you know, i only always read/comment/ you know the dealie, and they don't have the descincy(sp?) to watch me too. jeeze some peeps don't know what common courtisy is!

i'm on like every day too, cuz i'm a naughty person and go online during my comp. class so i know you people are rude to me.

there's also a few other people who read my shit (i think) and i love you guys too!

sorry for the chewing out, but i'm not myself lately. i'm either supre hyper or depressed lately so it's easy to tell which one i am right now. or not i don't know. i'm in the process of giving myself a guilt trip. those of you who read my stuff know why! ]]> ~cloudelfinulr36 http://cloudelfinulr36.deviantart.com/journal/6627743/ http://cloudelfinulr36.deviantart.com/journal/6627743/ Wed, 28 Sep 2005 17:46:03 PDT i've finally submitted new shit, so yeah. you all should read it, and stuff. yeah. lol. i'm cold, and out of it. and stuff. bye.

p.s. i'm really slow at checking out all you wonderous, peopleses stuffs, so forgive me if you've had some shit out, and i haven't checked it yet, i'm sorry! ]]> ~cloudelfinulr36 http://cloudelfinulr36.deviantart.com/journal/6407581/ http://cloudelfinulr36.deviantart.com/journal/6407581/ Sat, 03 Sep 2005 17:45:32 PDT
i got my permit though and i only failed the test once. although i looked stoned and whatnot in my pic it's still a permit theeforei'm allowed to drive even if mommy dear needs to be with me. when i first drove i was terrified because driving is scary. but now i sorta have the hang of it, but you'd think that after drivng for like two weeks, and not crashing into anything ever (unlike some of my neighbors) the peeps on my street would quit gawking at me and laughing and making fun of me. it's not very nice i don't appreciate it but when has anyone ever cared about my feelings, anywho.

i'm babysitting in omaha right now, for those that care i don'tlive in omaha, and i'm freezing, my hands ore going to get frost bite and fall off. it is so cold in here.

and for those that have noticed, i'm terribly sorry and i'm sure you're all tired of hearing my excuses, but i won't be posting anything today because, i left my poem shit in my locker at school on friday(aka yesterday)and all my junkis in there. so i may write something later tonight, and when i do i'll be sure to post it up here. i promise

that's it for now i think,.....um......oh yeah, boys!
my neighbors, we'll call them demon and macaroni
well demon i think now has a crush on me when i was so sure he hated me, which is wierd though because on tuesday he hated me and thursday he was flirting with me (i dont' count wednesday b/c i didn't see him that day). i hate how peeps think it's ok to screw with my head. well that is if he does like me, but i don't think he's being all flirty for mo reason, boys i know only do that when a)they like me or b) they have a gf. oh well

and the neighbor who i thought likes me (macoroni) now has a gf and she stayed the night last night, go roni! whoo! and yet gross at the same time, b/c he's fat and so ew!

ok that really is it for now. bye all. ]]> ~cloudelfinulr36 http://cloudelfinulr36.deviantart.com/journal/6245098/ http://cloudelfinulr36.deviantart.com/journal/6245098/ Tue, 16 Aug 2005 16:20:38 PDT
i just turned fifteen six days ago, i think, is it the sixteenth? well my b-day ws on the tenth, and now i'm fifteen! yay for me
in other news, my b-day party is on saturday, the 20th, and i'm going to iowa tomorrow to get one of my friends so she can come over and stay for the weekend. yay for me again.
ooooh ooooh, and also my friend-dragondemon11's birthday is on my birthday and we gave her a surprise party last saturday(the 13th) it was fun, her parents took us to the olive garden yum. and we didn't have to deal with pig lady(none of you want to know b/c those of us that do don't want to either)at all! more yay for me!

in semi-bad news, i don't have a functional dryer at the moment so i have to go to my grandparents house to dry my clothes. and my main job decided to move away. and i've been babysitting this guys' kid for him and he still hasn't paid me yet from last summer. but ya gotta have money and he claims he'll pay me on the 24th if not i'm out of a job b/c i won't babysit for him again.
also i've still been getting angry at some people latley and they have been ruining my good and jolly mood. jeez peeps what is wrong with you. and also i'm nervous about taking my permit test, that i haven't taken yet but i'm still nervous. and after i get i'll be nervous about driving. i'm a paranoid freak but you all still love me anyway. i hope.

i think that covers it so have fun reading my novel, i should be back on in a week-ish. sorry to those of you who i haven't looked at you stuff. i really have to go now, i'll try to check it all out when i have more time. adios! ]]> ~cloudelfinulr36 http://cloudelfinulr36.deviantart.com/journal/6136105/ http://cloudelfinulr36.deviantart.com/journal/6136105/ Thu, 04 Aug 2005 20:36:23 PDT ~cloudelfinulr36 http://cloudelfinulr36.deviantart.com/journal/6061409/ http://cloudelfinulr36.deviantart.com/journal/6061409/ Thu, 28 Jul 2005 19:59:11 PDT
take my hot neighbor. not a second glance
other one, right across the street. hates my guts for some unknown reason
and the one who does notice me, likes me, and i dont like him like that.

i'm at a loss. guys are so confusing. i don't understand it.
nor do i think i want to.

anyway. ummm. i don't know what else to write, except, uh oh, it may be a while before i post anything, i'm running out of ideas, and beign bored doesn't exactly help with insperation, ya know. ]]> ~cloudelfinulr36 http://cloudelfinulr36.deviantart.com/journal/6016720/ http://cloudelfinulr36.deviantart.com/journal/6016720/ Sat, 23 Jul 2005 21:45:50 PDT
ok i've finished the sixth HP book in like a day and a half, and i'm almost done with the Sabriel trilogy. wow i'm tellin' yeh, if you want plot twists go for it. the first one was a bit hard for me to get into, but eventually i was stuck with my nose smuging the pages. ok i wasn't that bad, but prety close

i can't wait for school to start so i can get out of my hell hole. my God, sreioulsy , i'm going to die, or kill someone. my only escape is through books, which is why i read so much btw.

oh and i've decided that whenever i get another cat, i'm going to name him Mogget. Ha ha ha. Mwa ha ha ha ha

oh and i've been getting up at seven thirty and going to bed at one somthin' for the past week, so please excuse the randomosity and stuff of this crazy blog like whatchamahooler.

END ]]> ~cloudelfinulr36 http://cloudelfinulr36.deviantart.com/journal/5944994/ http://cloudelfinulr36.deviantart.com/journal/5944994/ Fri, 15 Jul 2005 18:50:08 PDT
know why, i just ost a friendship b/c of complete stubborn and narrow minded idiosity. life is a bitch! ]]> ~cloudelfinulr36 http://cloudelfinulr36.deviantart.com/journal/5870773/ http://cloudelfinulr36.deviantart.com/journal/5870773/ Thu, 07 Jul 2005 19:40:54 PDT
anyway, i'm at my grandpartents house, not much is happening, i'm just in a constant state of bordomness and my ablilty to not spell is improving(therefore my spelling isn't)not much else to say that i know of, so i'll leave it at this before i bore you all even more. Adios

~nikki ]]> ~cloudelfinulr36 http://cloudelfinulr36.deviantart.com/journal/5745804/ http://cloudelfinulr36.deviantart.com/journal/5745804/ Fri, 24 Jun 2005 15:14:36 PDT
i just got back from iowa, yesterday, very boring, considering my friend has the iq of a stick. having any kind of conversation is like listening to a two year old. very annoying. oh and then the entire week she was bugging me about likeing her brother. #1: i've never seen her brother i just talked to him for like two minutes #2 he's a wankster, (white gangster) nothing against them, i'm not racist, but i don't date guys who are posers, and unless you were raised by blacks, and grew up around black people, to me it's really funny. i'm not into that.
#3 back to teh never seen him befroe stuff, you can't like someone you've never met. despite what he thinks; he says he's got a girlfriend who lives in norway, and he met her on the internet.

ok maybe stuff has happened but for me it was very boring indeed. ]]> ~cloudelfinulr36 http://cloudelfinulr36.deviantart.com/journal/5627985/ http://cloudelfinulr36.deviantart.com/journal/5627985/ Sun, 12 Jun 2005 14:15:10 PDT
anywho, i'm obviously babysitting, and i'm listening to Dora the Explora. fun fun.
not much else going on in my life, just boredom central, here in the land of the insane.

hope you all haven't been having as shitty a vaca as me. ]]> ~cloudelfinulr36 http://cloudelfinulr36.deviantart.com/journal/5627966/ http://cloudelfinulr36.deviantart.com/journal/5627966/ Sun, 12 Jun 2005 14:13:22 PDT
anywho, i'm obviously babysitting, and i'm listening to Dora the Explora. fun fun.
not much else going on in my life, just boredom central, here in the land of the insane.

hope you all haven't been having as shitty a vaca as me. ]]> ~cloudelfinulr36 http://cloudelfinulr36.deviantart.com/journal/5509251/ http://cloudelfinulr36.deviantart.com/journal/5509251/ Tue, 31 May 2005 07:26:42 PDT
oh and one more thing, we got a new tv, Yay! it's so big, well not really, b/c it's only a 32incher, but for us that's big, sad huh? but like i said i live with the technologically challenged, and i've found it's genetic!!! sucks all for me ]]> ~cloudelfinulr36 http://cloudelfinulr36.deviantart.com/journal/5467212/ http://cloudelfinulr36.deviantart.com/journal/5467212/ Sun, 29 May 2005 21:30:53 PDT
oh oh i remember! the year is almost over, and we have finals next week. (everyone*oh no*) yeah, it's bad. good news is i got my yearbook, so yay.

man it's really hard to do this while i'm trying to be sneaky too. damn teachers. gotta hurry

oh and sry brandi, i was reading your poems and thought they were from steph. so if they sound funny or weird


okay, i'm going t tell you all something very very sad, this is the latest i've stayed up all weekend. *everyone's jaw drops* i know pathetic but hey i've been a very busy and stressed out chick. between dealing with the asshole aka my dad, and dealing with finals next week, it's a wonder it took my face so long to just star breaking out huh? yeah that's right it finally started to come out in the acne. that's really bad i know.
but oh well we all get over eventually, but unfortunate for me, eventually won't be until next thrusday aafternoon. or possibly when school starts again and i have lss time on my hands therefore less time to do something worth getting yelled at. ]]> ~cloudelfinulr36 http://cloudelfinulr36.deviantart.com/journal/5357287/ http://cloudelfinulr36.deviantart.com/journal/5357287/ Sat, 14 May 2005 15:34:57 PDT ok i think that i'm not only challenged in the spelling department but i think i'm
technologically chalenged*gasp*
will some one help me maybe submit my poetry so that it's in the poetry thing i don't know i just need help that's all
then again what else is new.

not much elso going on in the fabulous life of nicole
*sarcasim* other than me babysitting, what else is new?
so that's it!

love ya all bye
~nikki ]]> ~cloudelfinulr36 http://cloudelfinulr36.deviantart.com/journal/5296643/ http://cloudelfinulr36.deviantart.com/journal/5296643/ Sat, 07 May 2005 23:39:16 PDT
i'm mega bored right now, and am in a state of confusion, but what else is new? i'm always confused, so whatever. That pretty much covers it right now, so bye!

~nikki

p.s. i have, a poem out so you neato bandito ppl should totally read it! ]]> ~cloudelfinulr36 http://cloudelfinulr36.deviantart.com/journal/5046810/ http://cloudelfinulr36.deviantart.com/journal/5046810/ Sat, 09 Apr 2005 22:13:22 PDT ~cloudelfinulr36