http://search.deviantart.com/?q=by:cmccrrzy&section=today deviantART RSS for by:cmccrrzy en-us Copyright 2009, deviantART.com Tue, 08 Dec 2009 21:27:38 PST deviantART.com http://blogs.law.harvard.edu/tech/rss http://s.deviantart.com/minish/widgets/apple-touch-icon-precomposed.png http://cmccrrzy.deviantart.com/journal/27936772/ http://cmccrrzy.deviantart.com/journal/27936772/ Sat, 24 Oct 2009 08:11:08 PDT
Later.

]]> ~cmccrrzy http://cmccrrzy.deviantart.com/journal/26092153/ http://cmccrrzy.deviantart.com/journal/26092153/ Tue, 21 Jul 2009 17:07:04 PDT
Just wanted to stick something here so I wouldn't keep logging on to see "2008" as the year I did my last entry.

My final summer reading assignment. Almost over T-T Friday.

Later.

]]> ~cmccrrzy http://cmccrrzy.deviantart.com/journal/20837573/ http://cmccrrzy.deviantart.com/journal/20837573/ Sun, 05 Oct 2008 07:42:31 PDT
Not much to say. Posting some stuff on livejournal. Actual writing. Reading a book in school that I actually enjoy, for once.

Getting through all the tivo crap that needs to be got through. Finally watched Hellboy full way through. Not bad. Not wonderful, in retrospect, I suppose, but not bad.

]]> ~cmccrrzy http://cmccrrzy.deviantart.com/journal/18753435/ http://cmccrrzy.deviantart.com/journal/18753435/ Mon, 09 Jun 2008 17:33:52 PDT
Well... um... yeah. Life's.... good I suppose. Finals.... which I should be studying for... Birthday's a week from Sunday. I've started my summer reading. Boring as hell.

Um.... yeah... not much else to say...

]]> ~cmccrrzy http://cmccrrzy.deviantart.com/journal/16505653/ http://cmccrrzy.deviantart.com/journal/16505653/ Mon, 21 Jan 2008 12:53:26 PST
Well, I got TR2 to work, thanks to Dad.

And I am officially not that good at it.... although I knew that after the first t-rex showed up.

And then, after waiting six or so years to finally get the guts to kill the thing, guess what happens? Irony, I tell ya,

A SECOND t-rex shows up 10 steps behind it.

...

That was several months ago, though. I decided, at that point, though, screw it, and went back up the cliff. And then, of course, I forgot about the two tigers that lunge out at you as you land with the zip-wire.

...

AND THEY DON'T FRICKEN DIE!!!

...

And why am I here again? I have homework to do.

]]> ~cmccrrzy http://cmccrrzy.deviantart.com/journal/15820930/ http://cmccrrzy.deviantart.com/journal/15820930/ Thu, 06 Dec 2007 12:47:54 PST
Amazing... maybe I'll finally put up some art now that that's done... or some writing, I guess...

I'm currently listening to 90s music and wandering the web for no apparent reason other than boredom when I should be doing my History paper...

Pathetic, I know... later...

]]> ~cmccrrzy http://cmccrrzy.deviantart.com/journal/15263478/ http://cmccrrzy.deviantart.com/journal/15263478/ Sun, 28 Oct 2007 19:13:12 PDT
GRRRR!!!!

]]> ~cmccrrzy http://cmccrrzy.deviantart.com/journal/15153528/ http://cmccrrzy.deviantart.com/journal/15153528/ Sun, 21 Oct 2007 06:52:09 PDT
O.o

For one thing, the first part I would never have guessed, and its freaking me out, and the second part is just totally freaking awesome! Because now I know it isn't speculation, its concrete fact!!!!!

Yondaime is Naruto's dad!!!! That is so cool!!!! And I finally know his mom's name!!! (yes, I am completely out of the loop of the world, and this information has probably been available for years, but I was too dumb to see it was right in front of my face)

Dumbledore... hmm... unexpected, but it figures, you know?

Anyway, who cares, its his business, the guy was still cool anyway... actually, it makes sense. And I'm gonna shut up now before I insult some hard-core dumbledore fan, kay?

(Yondaime's Naruto's DAD!!!!! )

]]> ~cmccrrzy http://cmccrrzy.deviantart.com/journal/14607520/ http://cmccrrzy.deviantart.com/journal/14607520/ Wed, 12 Sep 2007 17:58:37 PDT
Watch the world go drifting by

If you never say "hello"

You don't have to say "goodbye"

On a white ship will I sail

Into lands beyond the sea

Watching shadows follow me

Its so easy not to try

Watch the world go drifting by

If you never say "hello"

You don't have to say "goodbye"

Move along when troubles come

Like a mindless butterfly

Leaving havens clean with rain

Now that years have drift away

Roads I've traveled I must leave

For I've turned the final bend

Weep not empty tears but grieve

As the road comes to an end

Its so easy not to try

Watch the world go drifting by

If you never say "hello"

You don't have to say "goodbye"

-The Hobbit, Animated Movie

]]> ~cmccrrzy http://cmccrrzy.deviantart.com/journal/14501686/ http://cmccrrzy.deviantart.com/journal/14501686/ Wed, 05 Sep 2007 12:23:02 PDT
I just love starting a new year, don't YOU?

True, I have more chances to see my friends on a one on one basis, so I can patch up some stuff and enjoy my classes more than last year... but I hate my GYM class. HATE HATE HATE!!!!

Almost everyone in that class is either a prep, a moron, or freshman. Freshman irritate me. Especially the ones I know - they're quite stuck up. I get that last year I said the sophomores were stuck up (this year they're juniors and they are STILL stuck-up), but I mean, the difference between me and them is that I don't think in the slightest that I'm the greatest thing that ever happened to the universe. With all the crap I think in one night, who would?

I think I'm leaving orchestra, at least for a year. I might not, though. I'd like to see if I can make it into Advanced Chorus so my schedule doesn't have to change.... otherwise, I may just stay where I am. I'm all alone, though. And probably most of the freshman are better than me. It's extremely depressing.

I don't want to quit violin, but I want to SING!!! For four years I have been silent and I am just flipping ANGRY about it. I like singing. I'm not professional material, and the chances of me ever singing professionally (unless it's in a chorus) are extremely slim. Even in a chorus, they're slim. I don't CARE about singing professionally. I want to be in a class doing something I want and something I have some pride and skills in, with people I like and with a teacher who doesn't keep his head in the clouds.

Ignore me... I'm angsting... later.

]]> ~cmccrrzy http://cmccrrzy.deviantart.com/journal/14163103/ http://cmccrrzy.deviantart.com/journal/14163103/ Tue, 14 Aug 2007 10:14:23 PDT

Hmm... I really would like to read the book, though, and the fact that it's sitting right in front of me, glaring at me, while I desperately try to finish the impossibly LONG trilogy I was reading before... is just not helping. It looks so... INVITING...

Okay... I was right, though. Long hair can do wonders for a lot of me. For some guys, short hair is a good thing, of course. Any number of morons in my orchestra class is an obvious sign of THAT. But I mean... Tristan didn't have much going for him with short hair. Then he got long hair... nice looking long hair... -sigh-

And that coat is really good looking on him. Those shirts, the the type with the baggy part around the wrist, are TOO COOL!!! I loves them to death!!! I know the purpose isn't specifically to make them look cool... they were like, napkins or something... but still... they is too cool!!!

Must see... movie... again... now... +_=

]]> ~cmccrrzy http://cmccrrzy.deviantart.com/journal/13914098/ http://cmccrrzy.deviantart.com/journal/13914098/ Sat, 28 Jul 2007 12:44:17 PDT
Not much to say here....

I bought comixes!!! Lots of comixes!!!! +_-

Poor Alviss... lost to Jack on the hot scale... Although, if that's what Pano thinks, then I don't he should feel so hurt...

I finally finished Damia's Children, too! At long last! (Not my fault if the library has too many graphic novels I wanted to read... only read 40 or so, anyway...

I'm writing/typing again!!! Although it still isn't my book... another short story. One I came up with like, four years ago or so...

I could finish it today, though. It may end up being eaten by JDV, since I really like the ending, but who knows... it will DEFINITELY turn out to be a short story, at any rate. I likes the idea, but I think there will only be three (four tops) main characters, and possibly no villain, or if it is one, it will be like, an animal demon which will play, like, no part in the main story... Anyway, the small amount of main charas lessens my idea pool...

To my document of doom!!!! Choi!

]]> ~cmccrrzy http://cmccrrzy.deviantart.com/journal/13761375/ http://cmccrrzy.deviantart.com/journal/13761375/ Mon, 16 Jul 2007 19:19:33 PDT
Ratcliff is still so short! Hermione is taller than he is! It's so sad. Everyone is taller.... The girl who plays Ginny might even be taller...

Poor Ratcliff (or however you spell your name)... may you grow twenty inches in the next two years it takes to make number 6!

]]> ~cmccrrzy http://cmccrrzy.deviantart.com/journal/13458634/ http://cmccrrzy.deviantart.com/journal/13458634/ Sat, 23 Jun 2007 10:54:27 PDT
So looking back, do I see. Was that my mistake? That I gave such a gift...

No forgiveness, so I know.

This sorrow... I fare it well, and goodbye.

]]> ~cmccrrzy http://cmccrrzy.deviantart.com/journal/13423587/ http://cmccrrzy.deviantart.com/journal/13423587/ Wed, 20 Jun 2007 18:40:43 PDT
And there was much rejoicing. -Yay-

]]> ~cmccrrzy http://cmccrrzy.deviantart.com/journal/13360318/ http://cmccrrzy.deviantart.com/journal/13360318/ Fri, 15 Jun 2007 19:09:37 PDT
- Albert Einstein

I think I've found a way to relate the Black and White Knights. I like the new idea. Its interesting. I need to work on writing myths. It has too many details. Myths don't have details. Cultural myths, anyway. Well.... I mean, this level of dialogue.

One more book before The Foreigner Series is over. Yay!!!

I think I'm gonna go see a movie for my birthday next week. Maybe Pirates (4th time; yes, I'm a dork) and maybe Silver Surfer, if I haven't already seen it.

I'll be __ in a week!!!!



]]> ~cmccrrzy http://cmccrrzy.deviantart.com/journal/12806505/ http://cmccrrzy.deviantart.com/journal/12806505/ Tue, 01 May 2007 17:27:55 PDT
Peter... is still fricken cool. And its about time he and Syler had it out! I mean, last episode was kinda cool and all, what with them throwing each other around with the room with their telepathy and stuff, but I mean... they GLOWED this time round...

DUDE....

Poor Hatian dude. Whose name I don't think we ever learned...

And... Nikki and Peter... not something I saw coming. Of course, now that he's a big time awesome cool powerful dude, you know... anything is possible. And Nikki's all pissy. Sorta. What happened to the fire dude, Claire's grandma, Simone, and Invisible Dude? Where'd they go?

....

Hmm...

Peter is still fricken cool and if he dies that show will suck.

GRRR.

]]> ~cmccrrzy http://cmccrrzy.deviantart.com/journal/12720429/ http://cmccrrzy.deviantart.com/journal/12720429/ Tue, 24 Apr 2007 16:39:35 PDT
AND HE ISN'T DEAD!!!!!!

But... Isaac is....

And Syler sucks at painting.

]]> ~cmccrrzy http://cmccrrzy.deviantart.com/journal/12421102/ http://cmccrrzy.deviantart.com/journal/12421102/ Sun, 01 Apr 2007 18:38:32 PDT
10 weeks. If they stay the same.

-Ta

]]> ~cmccrrzy http://cmccrrzy.deviantart.com/journal/12085527/ http://cmccrrzy.deviantart.com/journal/12085527/ Tue, 06 Mar 2007 19:03:07 PST
"You do have a taste for the dramatic, don't you?"

Her wings fluffled themselves out, extending "halfway", so that she could at least stretch them a LITTLE. The man raised his right eyebrow at the reaction, but didn't respond to it. Instead, he shrugged, and walked over to her. His short, black hair was well a little scruffy, but it had a... firm, kind of set look on his light-skinned head. He had a serious face, and it was only accentuated by the uniform he was wearing. The black made his skin stand out even more in the night light. He moved out to stand next to her, and put his hands in his pockets as he looked out on the city as well. His observations made made him breathe out heavily, and he glanced at her out of the corner of his eye.

She hadn't moved to look at him. She was still watching the city with a serious, slightly sad, studying look about her. He watched the lightly colored strands of her long hair fly in the wind...

She turned to smile at him, shutting her eyes in an innocent way, and saving him from thoughts he shoudn't have been thinking in the first place.

"Evening, Commander. How goes the killing?"

THAT made him narrow his eyes in annoyance. But instead of an angry retort, he turned his head back to the city and said, calmly, with only a HINT of anger,

"We're the army, Convict, not assasins. And we only kill when we're ordered to."

She snorted, "That's new."

"Please, don't sound so surprised." He replied, sarcastically. "You were the one that told us we'd be doing the same things as those criminals we pushed out. But I kept my word. It's not quite the same as it was. It's more... friendly, I suppose."

"In the sense that more people are welcome to it or more people die FROM it, I wonder?"

"..."

"Thought so. And I'm not a Convict, any more. You gave me a full pardon for that."

He was silent for a moment. Then he looked at her, and murmured,

"That wasn't all we gave you."

Now she was silent, and she looked away, her smile gone. He was surprised, slightly, by her reaction.

"I need your help again, Ron. It's important, this time."

He didn't remark on the fact that she had changed the subject. But he did reply, with more sarcasm,

"And what you needed before wasn't?"

"I could have broken out of that jail. You all were just convenient."

"Of COURSE we were."

"Ron-"

"All right, all right. What is it? Something about that group of yours. Odd bunch of people you're hanging around with. The Dwarf is interesting, and the Elf and Mergirl could be, as well. But it's those two humans. That's royalty, Goldy, and no mistake. But are YOU doing hanging around with a prince and a princess? Being their fairy godmother?"

Goldy laughed, and he smiled, but she quickly sobered, and looked at him, fiercely.

"We need help, Ron. Really need help. That "princess" is trying to take back her home, and the six of us together, plus some help she seems to have buried somewhere, might not be enough."

Ron smirked,

"What, YOU need OUR help? Ironic, I think. The Great Goldy, single-handed bringer of the peace, needs OUR humble help? I thought we were nothing but a group of blood-thirsty assasins, as you so kindly mentioned earlier in this conversa-"

But he had looked back at her, and what he saw in her eyes made him stop. She was looking at him, very seriously. He was confused, but it dawned on him, at last,

"You're really serious. What in hell have you gotten yourself into? What have those kids made you do?"

She blinked in surprise as she heard the concern in his voice, and it brought a smile to her face, but she turned away before he could see it well. She sighed, and replied, after a moment,

"They're special, Ron. The real thing, you know? Not these fools they birth out every few years and cram a crown on. One of those once in a lifetime ones. The world-changers, Goddess help us. And I believe she IS helping, Ron. She wants them to... to "win", as you would put it. And... I want them to win, too. And I'll help them do it, if it's the last thing I ever do."

Ron blinked in surprise. The smile was gone, replaced by firey determination, causing her wings to spread out further, and clenching her hands into fists. He had never seen her like this before. Not even back during the war, when she was planning the most ingenious strategies he'd ever seen. Where had that girl gone? That young woman he had broken out of prison on mere chance. The one who... ]]> ~cmccrrzy http://cmccrrzy.deviantart.com/journal/11926655/ http://cmccrrzy.deviantart.com/journal/11926655/ Thu, 22 Feb 2007 19:32:30 PST
"No! We won't leave you behind!"

"... Turn on your viewer Tom."

Thomas frowned in confusion at her sudden change in topic, but, obediently, he pressed a small button on the
keyboard. The large screen before him lit up, showing a young woman, Tina, sitting in a chair, steering a plane. Her face was set and blank, and he knew she was looking at an image of himself and the three people standing around his chair.

Her mask was gone. It had gotten torn in the crash, and she had torn the rest of it off for air and a breeze. The revealed skin was pale, and a line of blood dripped downward from the right corner of her pursed lips. There was a cut on her cheek, and her hair was mangled and dirty. She looked to be in very bad condition, but she sat as if at attention.

She seemed to smile slightly as they viewer turned on, and he felt some relief that she still could. Somewhere inside of his heart, he still believed she would be coming back.

"Tom, please..."

He narrowed his eyes at her, and her face suddenly looked very tired as her expression lost its fierceness.

"Tom, I-... I can't come back."

"Why?" he asked, too tired of asking the question to say more. She was silent for a while, seemingly uncertain. Then she spoke,

"In the crash before... I can't feel my legs, Tom."

There was silence. The sentence had been abrupt.

]]> ~cmccrrzy http://cmccrrzy.deviantart.com/journal/11803359/ http://cmccrrzy.deviantart.com/journal/11803359/ Tue, 13 Feb 2007 18:27:17 PST
The bartender pretended like he wasn't keeping an eye on her, talking gaily to other customers, of which there were few. The woman's friends sat nearby, on her right, talking about the war, the war, and the war. They occasionally spoke of... the WAR. The word kept blaring itself out in her mind, although the casual onlooker wouldn't be able to tell.

Every so often, so she would maneuver her hand down and around the glass, ready to pick it up, and bring it to her lips. But she never did. She would sit that way for a moment, still staring at the glass, lest it try and escape her fingers, until she finally went back to circling the lip with her finger.

Karie, two seats away, on the right of Risa, who was on the woman's direct right, glanced her way every now and then, trying to make the looks as inconspicuous as the barkeep's occasional glances. Risa continued to watch Karie, using Karie's reaction from her glances at the woman, Mary, to reassure herself of her friend's health, instead of constantly turning around, even a smidgen, to look at her, which would have been rude. So far, all was well. Mary had remained in her seat, and hadn't said a word beyond ordering her drink.

The bar was pretty quiet. It was late. Two of the booths housed customers, and one of the tables had a couple of guys playing a friendly game of cards. Three other seats on the other end of the bar were filled, leaving a space six seats wide between them and the three women. The light was dim, and the windows were dark from the night sky. The atmosphere was soft, drowsy, and peaceful. The door opened, the bell rang, and the door shut again. Mary heard footsteps approaching, but didn't turn, even when they came to stop next to her, and sat down in the seat beside her.

Her current sitting position didn't let her see her "companion" as it were. She had leaned over the bar, laying her arms down on the counter, resting her head in one arm, and putting one arm ove her head in an odd position, as she stared at eye level at the glass she still hadn't emptied.

"Hi, welcome to Steve's. What would you like?"

"Just water, if you please."

The barkeep went and came back with the man's odd order, and the voice struck chords in Mary's memory, but she couldn't remember at the moment, she was too lost in her own muggy thoughts...

"You sure you ain't had enough yet, soldier?"

The words came from the man sitting next to her. Her reply was a little slow, but the words were remembered, burned into her mind.

"What makes you think I'm a soldier?"

As soon as she said it, she wondered why she had. It had been an automatic response, but for a total stranger...?

"Soldiers can't hold their liquor, that's why. And you're wearing a uniform, although the definition of the word would be stretched in your case."

She felt like she wanted to punch him for some reason. He was being irritating, and a little rude. But she wondered why she wanted to do it so badly? She finally decided to turn her head over for a moment or so, glance at the odd, irritating stranger. What met her eyes froze her whole body.

The man was silent now, and took a "swig" of his water. He was dusty from travel, and his hair was a bit dissheveled. But then... it always was. He had always been getting into fights and messes. She'd always had to fix it up 'fore they went to training in the morning so he could fool the teacher by making him not believe he had been in a fight.

The short, brown hair she remembered so well... that chin, a little pointed, to be sure, but also firm, and so.... strong? Was that what had happened to him?

She didn't remember that strength, or, not so much of it, anyway. Maybe her memories were fooling her. But it was the eyes that did her in. Those wild, green eyes of his that danced in the light as he turned to her, grinning from ear to ear.

"Hey." was all he said.

She was still staring at him. She didn't care that she looked silly, gaping at a man in the middle of a bar with a full drink literally at her fingertips. But then she felt like laughing from the irony of it all. Damn him.

]]> ~cmccrrzy http://cmccrrzy.deviantart.com/journal/11591832/ http://cmccrrzy.deviantart.com/journal/11591832/ Sat, 27 Jan 2007 19:32:20 PST
"Well, it is me, right? What DO you expect?"

She held the smile as he stared at her in surprise, then shook his head, and laughed,

"Whatever you say, sensai!"

Then he turned and ran to the woods excitedly, ready for his new mission.

He didn't see her smile slowly fade, until it was almost gone completely. Her face was sad as she watched his form fade into the distance. She watched him long after he had dissapeared completely from her sight. She didn't even look up as she said,

"Come out, Karuna. I know you're there. I can feel your aura a mile away."

To the naked eye, nothing happened, besides a slight blur appearing in the air above the woman's head, on the edge of the roof she was standing under. Tazuni smirked and said,

"All right, fine. Don't come out. But you really need to stop doing that. One of these days, I may just get too annoyed with it and come up there to kill you."

No reply.

She sighed and said, "I know what it is you want to say. I've heard it all before. But..."

She looked at the spot where the boy had disappeared.

"I want to protect him, always. But I can't. He's young, but strong. Stronger than he knows, yet weaker at the same time. He doesn't know how to properly use that potential of his. I can't tell him straight out either. I want to, but he could find out about Raiyu..."

Her face tightened.

"I don't want him to blame himself for Raiyu, once he finds out. I know he would, once he understood everything. I can't handle him in that sort of pain. So I protect him this way. Making him stronger, allowing him to protect himself. Instead of letting me do it. Yet every time I see him..."

Her face melted into a bland state, and she said,

"He looks like Raiyu. More and more every day. It makes my heart ache. I don't know what's worse. Seeing him or not seeing him. If he were to do die because of some mistake of mine, whether because I wasn't there to protect him myself, or because he wasn't strong enough to do it himself... I just couldn't live with myself-!"

She clenched her fists in anger. Then, slowly, she unclenched them.

"Bah, I'm only ranting on... This doesn't help anyone."

She leaned back against the wall, her bangs falling over to shade her eyes.

"Please, Karuna. Protect him for me. He's all I have left."

There was a moment more of the blur, and then it was gone. Tazuni waited a moment, then breathed out, hard, closing her eyes, letting the tears coarse down her cheeks.

"Thank you." she whispered. "Thank you for protecting my son."

]]> ~cmccrrzy http://cmccrrzy.deviantart.com/journal/11569485/ http://cmccrrzy.deviantart.com/journal/11569485/ Thu, 25 Jan 2007 20:00:11 PST
She looked down at it, and her face softened, and she looked sad.

"I'm afraid it isn't over."

Triki and Caris turned back to her, surprised at her statement.

"What do you mean, milady?" asked Triki.

Fira looked up at Triki, and smiled, and warning bells went off once more in Triki's as yet not entirely eased mind. That smile was... happy, yet sad. As if she was being released from something, but was regretting letting go. That was what he felt anyway. But he didn't understand why she looked that way. He didn't want to guess...

Fira turned her gaze to look at Caris, not saying anything to Triki. She smiled again, shutting her eyes with the wideness of her smile.

"I haven't changed my mind in the slightest. It's all for the best."

Caris frowned in confusion, lost as to what the disheveled human was talking about. Then it hit her, and she froze in place, her eyes starting to widen in understanding.

Fira didn't seem to notice. She looked at the corner, where her bed was. Still made and neat. Covered in dust and a little debris, perhaps. But still as welcoming as it had seemed the moment she walked into the room for the first time, only, what, two days ago?

"And I never got to enjoy the bed. Figures." Then she moved the gun to point over her heart, and pulled the trigger.

]]> ~cmccrrzy http://cmccrrzy.deviantart.com/journal/11427488/ http://cmccrrzy.deviantart.com/journal/11427488/ Sat, 13 Jan 2007 20:56:55 PST
They stopped for a moment to catch their breath. Rikari was still arguing with Tonis, while the other guards spread out a little to guard the doors with watchful eyes. Karey glanced at them out of the corner of her eyes, warily. She could hear the sound of running feet outside in the hall. She had never realized how little she liked the sound.

Tonis took out his gun again, and pushed Rikari down behind a couch, against her loud protests, and the guards moved back a little, to blend into the wall. One of them motioned for her to join Rikari and Tonis, so she moved towards them slightly, but paused, when she remembered one of the trophies hanging on a wall in here. She threw her bag down near Rikari, then ran into one of the other rooms, much to Tonis' anger.

She grabbed the twin swords from the wall, and felt the rust in them. The ancientness. It was almost welcoming, now. The rust fell away in a small cloud of smoke, and she held two blades that felt brand new, and with one glance of her eyes, they were also sharpened, new blades.

She ran back to the room, to find herself the subject of numerous pulsars. She held up her hands, with either sword in hand, and moved forward into the light of the still burning fire.

]]> ~cmccrrzy http://cmccrrzy.deviantart.com/journal/11329837/ http://cmccrrzy.deviantart.com/journal/11329837/ Fri, 05 Jan 2007 20:37:01 PST
He turned around, and stared. Krika looked over his shoulder, but she was confused. She could barely see anything. The figures were too far away. Toski was a little bit of a different story. He couldn't see anything either, but he could tell that something was definately going on, and he didn't really like the feeling he was getting from the situation.

There seemed to be a bright light behind (in front) of Orogrund, and seemed to be coming from an invisible tunnel or door, floating in the air. Two figures stood in the center of the doorway, becoming shadows in the brightness of the light.

One stepped forward, and came slightly away from the light. Its figure conformed to that of a young woman, and her hair gained a yellow color as she moved farther and farther from that great brightness. Her skin became light peach, and a smile appeared on her face beneath laughing green eyes. Her outfit was odd, yet seemed somehow official and orderly. She was obviously a ninja, or some type of killer, because she was carrying another kunainai in her hand, and spikes bristled from a glove on her other arm. Pins held up some of her hair, and they were no doubt quite sharp and ready for easy use at any time.

She was also wearing a sword on her back.

She watched the strange group for a moment, grinning at them oddly. Then she took her attention away from them to glance around, looking at everything: the sky, the trees, the grass, the birds, as if she didn't know where she was and was taking in the scenery.

"Well, I think this is it." she said. Her voice was cheery and bouncy, as if she was the type of person that was constantly happy and found absolutely nothing wrong with the world at almost any time.

The second figure walked forward, and it was now noticable that he was coughing into his hand. Not an ill type of cough, but the type where someone was catching their breath form a long exercise. He also looked exasperated. In no way did his outfit resemble the woman's, but there was smomething... uniform about their clothes. As if they shared something in common besides the obvious fact of them traveling together in some way, shape, or form.

"You THINK it is? If you only THINK it is, why didn't you tell me BEFORE we left. Then I wouldn't have come on this ridiculous nie-impossible trip with you. Or at least I would have been better prepared for it."

The woman glanced at him, sweetly, "Oh, stop your whining. I got us here, didn't I? Now that we're here, I know I can get us back too. So there's nothing to worry about."

He raised his eyebrows and began to talk angrily, "Wait, you mean there was a chance we wouldn't have been able to-"

She waved her hand dismissivly at him, and turned back to the group before her as the door vanished from sight. Just vanished. In thin air.

She smiled at Krika and Toski in a motherly and warm fashion that an all-knowing, all-powerful person would give a far weaker person in a dangerous and frightening situation.

"Don't worry, kids. We're here to help. Oh, and ignore my companion. He's rather unmotivated. But he only gets angry when things are important and he thinks I'll screw up on them. Its his good side, I'm afraid."

The man glared, but she didn't seem to take notice, and turned to Orogrund, who was doing some still-astonished glaring of his own then.

"Who the hell are you people?" he said, annoyed.

She was still smiling, but it seemed to lessen, ever so slightly, and go cold at his tone.

"Oh, you don't know?" It was then that Toski started thinking there was something familiar about the two of them, especially the woman, and Krika (though it took a bit longer) started to think the same thing.

The woman put on something of an air and grinned,

"I'm Krika Tosimawa, 6th Hawari. And I'm here to destroy you."

]]> ~cmccrrzy http://cmccrrzy.deviantart.com/journal/11315855/ http://cmccrrzy.deviantart.com/journal/11315855/ Thu, 04 Jan 2007 16:35:05 PST
Come and see my dreams, my dear, come and see my woes

Come and see the landscapes drear, and the chained crows

Come and see the falling tears, and the pools of blood

Come and see the rows of book, of pain and suff'ring sorrows

Come and see the fading light, and the dust filled hollows

Come and see the darkness dear, and the saddened swallows

Come and see those dying fast, and come and see those lyin'

Bright red tears have fallen here, and cold ones aching still

What little girl would you find here? What happy child of yore?

What innocence will you search for, my dear, what lost joy to feel?

Come and see my world my dear, come and see my woes.

]]> ~cmccrrzy http://cmccrrzy.deviantart.com/journal/11292685/ http://cmccrrzy.deviantart.com/journal/11292685/ Tue, 02 Jan 2007 18:41:11 PST
Eventually, the laughter faded, and a new topic was brought to light at the table, but the girl thought, briefly, on the previous talk. What she had said to make the others so happy. She could see the smiles on their faces. They were all enjoying themselves. Talking, arguing, laughing, eating... it was so warm at the table.

She didn't know what they were talking about, but that wasn't unusual. She was often lost in these conversations about actors she probably knew about but didn't know by name, movies she had never watched, philosophies she had never thought on. She didn't mind. As long as she nodded her head, laughed occasionally at something SHE personally thought was funny, and joined in the laugther with everyone else even if she didn't know what was funny, it was okay to be a little ignorant.

Plus, seeing her friends laugh was funny enough that she didn't have to pretend. Not that her friends were funny looking or anything, but the feeling was too much for her to contain by simply sitting there and staring around helplessly.

She had been realizing more and more lately that she liked it when she could make others laugh. She still believed that she did everything she did for personal entertainment, and the need to pertain her "image" or "reputation". But, slowly, her sullen, cold exterior had melted away to an insane, funny, and innocent creature that couldn't harm a fly at times, but had the secret wrath of the most evil of creatures when she felt like it.

The persona suited her. It was true. Anger wasn't an emotion she loved. Who could? It hurt, didn't allow one to focus well, and didn't make people happy. But when she was angry... oh boy, was she angry...

Still, her innocent exterior kept her warm. She didn't have to be tall or commanding. She had plenty of friends to do that for her. Anyway, she could act as commanding as she wanted with some of her friends. She was like a guiding light sometimes, even if she was a decent follower, as well.

Over all, her station in girl was perfectly fine now, although she could work on it a little. She was finally gaining the friendships and power she had been thirsty for for years, and now that she was getting them, she wanted to bind them more. The power wasn't so much controlling, as it made her place in the hierarchy of girlness more firm. And she was happy, at any rate. So she didn't feel rushed to make mistakes with her movements. Not rushed at all.

She smiled, and no one, not even her best friend beside her, whom she had know since she had moved here back in 1st grade, around nine years ago, could have seen the knowledge and motives behind those innocent eyes.

]]> ~cmccrrzy http://cmccrrzy.deviantart.com/journal/11263987/ http://cmccrrzy.deviantart.com/journal/11263987/ Sun, 31 Dec 2006 19:47:18 PST
"Give him back, you bastard! He never should have died in the first place! He was a good man! With a wife and a child! He had a good life, and it was stolen before he could enjoy as fully as he could! You had no right to take him!"

She smiled at him and said,

"If you'll excuse ME, dearest Marty, but YOU have no right to tell ME what I have a right to do. Secondly, I wan't the one that took him away in the first place. Neither was I in the position to stop the person that did. And I am not in the position (at the moment) to bring him back from an area which I have basicly no business in being in."

He must have looked confused, because she smiled wickedly again and said, "Don't worry about it. Perhaps I'll get him back. I don't know. I'm not omnicient...quite. But I can try, sometime. For now, though, this is all your problem. And under no circumstances will I try to do anything about the problem if you try to do it yourself, understand?"

Martan was still angry, but he reluctantly nodded after a time, and the smile gentled, somewhat. Then she gave him a small salute, and vanished.

]]> ~cmccrrzy http://cmccrrzy.deviantart.com/journal/11263880/ http://cmccrrzy.deviantart.com/journal/11263880/ Sun, 31 Dec 2006 19:39:42 PST
Slowly, the visitors stepped out of the room, one by one, quietly making their exits to allow the room's owner some privacy of thought.

Soon, only Hannah and Martan remained. She glanced at him for a moment, and possibly would have stayed, since he hadn't actually TOLD her to go, but then she turned away, walked into the bedroom, and shut the door.

Then Martan was alone... so very alone. He was still sitting at the desk, staring at his hands. The rain pattered against the window, now, like someone hitting the glass constantly all over its surface at the same time over and over again. It was getting harder.

Yet he sat, his mind recalling a kind face that had been erased from his life forever by a bullet.... He hadn't realized how much he had actually cared for the man as a friend before he was killed.... now....

He smiled slightly, truly understanding, once again, Allen and Beth's resolve in what they had tried to do so long ago...

A soft chuckle pushed him abruptly out of his thoughts. His head snapped up and he turned around. He saw a dark figure standing against the opposite wall, barely illuminated by the dimming light.

"So... the military brat finally gets it, does he? But then, he got it long ago, didn't he..."

He rose in his chair as he didn't recognize the voice. Womanly, obviously. Young, too. But cold, and commanding. It sounded a little like Beth, and that LOOKED like Beth, somewhat. But the voice was just that much different that something in his mind told him it couldn't be.

He unconciously reached for the gun on the desk, and his movement was greeted with another chuckle.

"Gun won't do you any good, boy. Shoot me all you want. All you'll get is a recked wall and complaints from Hannah and the neighbors. You can't kill a goddess, sweatheart."

Mustang narrowed his eyes, and asked,

"Who are you?"

Thunder sounded, and a bolt of lightning flashed out in the night, and the lights went completely out, leaving the two of them in the dark, the space between them lit only by the light of the window, which was from streelights and occasional blasts of thunder. But he could see her eyes, now. Bright eyes, they were.

"Well, the storm didn't seem to like your question. I almost agree. A might disrepectful, especially coming from one such as yourself. But then, I always have treasured that trait in my chosen. Forward. Abrupt. Surprising. Of course, you aren't one of my chosen, but... I'll make an exception."

She moved away from the wall, and was caught in the flash of another bolt of lightning. For a few brief moments, Martan stared, surprised, at a colder, taller, and frightening version of Bethany Riatta.

"The truth cannot be seen sometimes... just as things are now. I am merely borrowing this form until my work here is done and I may move on to others who need me for a short time. Eventually I will return to my body, but that will be many, many of your human years... of course, it wasn't MY choice for it to be so. If the bloody council hadn't condemned me to be stuck in this state then I-..."

She stopped abruptly, and smiled, shaking her head. Or at least, that's what it looked like in the bare illumination, to him.

"I'm going off of tangents. In answer to your question, you already know. But a book from the library may help you. Its called Ea: The Making. You might like it. You might not. I personally don't see you as one for fairy tales, though, since thats what you'll think it is. Anyway, on to business. I forbid you from doing what you think you're going to do."

]]> ~cmccrrzy http://cmccrrzy.deviantart.com/journal/11237754/ http://cmccrrzy.deviantart.com/journal/11237754/ Fri, 29 Dec 2006 20:05:53 PST
....

A glint appeared in her eye, then, too small for the others to see.

Roy grinned at Walter as he made a joke, and joined in the laughter made by his friends. He didn't know what it was, but something made him glance over in the direction Sara had just walked in. He paused in his laughter to raise his eyebrows in surprise as she finished strapping on the big, round helmet she wore for driving her motorcycle, and slung her leg over the other side to sit down in the seat.

Her hands gripped the handlebars, and she keyed the ignition. She started the bike up, and the noise of the engine suddenly whirring to life made the others turn in her direction. The laughter turned to whispered surprise as she revved it just slightly. She sat there for a moment, seeming to take an intense interest in examining the road. No one noticed Yorik step out of his garage, wiping his hands off with a towel. He frowned as he noticed what all the fuss was about, but didn't say anything.

Then... before he even realized it, she stepped on the gas, and zoomed away.

Cheers erupted from her audience as she zoomed past them, her front wheel rising into the air before as she lifted it up, causing even louder hollers to go out into the night.

Then her wheel was down in a flash, and she went straight up the makeshift ramp, and was soaring through the air. Then... she took her feet off pedals, and seemed to push herself, slowly, up from the handbar, until she seemed to be doing a handstand on them. Gasps erupted from her audience as she did the move, and she descended, slowly, seemingly, towards the road, and got back into her sitting position, slamming on the road on both wheels, and sending up sparks as she landed, swerving around in a small circle, and stopped, facing her starting point. Then she turned off the bike, and took off her helmet, flipping her golden hair back as she laughed for pure joy of the thrill, while cheers raced towards her.

]]> ~cmccrrzy http://cmccrrzy.deviantart.com/journal/11203753/ http://cmccrrzy.deviantart.com/journal/11203753/ Tue, 26 Dec 2006 17:58:16 PST
God... she did NOT want to know what was IN that water... but there was nothing else to keep her mind busy... Busy... so that she didn't think about her current circumstances any more.

She was still leaning against the wall, although, "lean" wouldn't be an good term to describe her action if "to lean" was considered an action which required strength of will. She was "leaning" against the wall because she had been dropped there, and fallen against the wall in her last act of movement.

So she had been "leaning" for the past two or three hours... or perhaps it had been days, years... she didn't know. She didn't care anymore. It hurt more to finally realize that - that she didn't care. Didn't care that she would probably never see the sunlight again. Never see her friends again (if any were still alive to see her in the first place), never see her family again (what was left of it), or her home... if one could call a bunch of ruined buildings in the middle of a smoldering wasteland home....

And it had all been her fault. One action. One mistake. And everything had crumbled. She had been told time and time again that it wasn't her fault. She couldn't blame herself for the deaths of others because she couldn't save them when she wasn't the one who tried to kill them in the first place.

She had been told. She hadn't listened. So she had been beating herself up for it. Every day now. Every moment. Every single, be-damned moment... ever since she came. Ever since she had nothing to do but sit and watch sewer water drip from a ceiling she could barely see in the darkness of her cell... her tomb....

For a moment, she wondered if it had been worth. Instantly, her mind told that it had. She had done the right thing... right?

...

Right?

Then the cell door slammed open, sending a bright ray of light across her. She shut her eyes in pain from seeing light after so long. Then they were dragging her out of the room, and she wondered what was going to happen.

She didn't reflect on the different tortures they could inflict on her, or the questions they would persist in asking nonstop. They had done it all before. Twice before. Three... four times.... she had lost track some time ago... and she was finished with being scared. She would have welcomed death, now. The Cold Goddess had been her companion for so long... she wouldn't have minded coming into Death's embrace.

And then they dragged her to a new room. A room she recognized. This was where poor insane Tommy had met his end. At the end of a rope. She looked to see if there was one waiting for her, but she could find none, and there was no man in a mask routine going on the platform. Actually, there was no platform. But she didn't get to look much more before she thrown against another wall.

She groaned, but remained standing. Muttering obscenities, she looked up, wondering what they were going to do. Then her eyes widened as she saw him...

The Captain was standing there, tall and grand as ever, watching her with a sadness she had seen on his face before, as he read the death notices of other soldiers... men and women who he had and hand't known, who had gone to their deaths. Whose deaths he had to tell some one else, and break someone's heart, right after he broke his own in the midst of one more loss. And she saw, standing next to him, the bastard that had been torturing her ever since she came.

It almost brought a small piece of warmth to her heart as she remembered a thought that had crossed her mind on her fourth or fifth torture session. He had been walking around the table where she sat, asking her questions over and over, as she watched his skinny form walk around and around her. She had thought, I can't even call him a FAT bastard. Damn him for ruining my fun....

And she hadn't hidden her laughter. If only to annoy him at her unspoken joke. She had enjoyed it, even if it earned her four more lashes at the end of her session. It was worth it.

Now, as she watched the gunmen lining up for what she knew was obviously her execution, the thought felt almost like "dust in the wind" compared to her current circumstances. She wished she could fly away with them, but then, this was what she had been waiting for. A chance to go. To say goodbye to this endless torture called life. But now that it had come... she was... afraid. Not afraid of the pain. She was used to pain by now. She couldn't care less. But, perhaps afraid of the unknown. She wasn't a goddess-fearing individual. After all, if a goddess was worthy of being loved, why should she be feared? Still... she really did wonder what would happen to her soul.... or consiousness at any rate.

]]> ~cmccrrzy http://cmccrrzy.deviantart.com/journal/11108342/ http://cmccrrzy.deviantart.com/journal/11108342/ Mon, 18 Dec 2006 17:48:24 PST
Irye was watching the woman carefully, especially after she had uttered her name and "job". One of those bloody torturers! Those bastards had no right to still exist! And after all of the people they'd ruthlessly killed for money, throwing away morals and principles to raise their wealth.

And to find a woman like that, right in the middle of their meeting place, fallen right into their hands... the word, "vengeance" sprung to mind more than once.

And she had made no move to defend herself. No sign that she knew what type of a murderer's den she had stumbled into, accidentally, seemingly, although Irye had doughts on that.

As did Matus. He pointed his spear at her, and said, "We should kill her, before she reports back to her masters about us."

Although a little bit blunt and to the point, Irye agreed with Matus completely, an odd thing for the two of them.

Travis was still looking at the girl, straight into her eyes, in fact. Then he smiled, and said, "I didn't know you agreed so readily to murdering children, Matus." He said, without looking away from the girl.

Matus was about to respond smartly, but stopped mid-word and said, "Children? You're saying SHE is a child?"

"Can you not see that yourself?" Said Travis. He was still looking at the girl. Now that Irye actually LOOKED, the signs were pretty obvious. Although the girl was obviously in her mid or late teens, she was no adult. She was taller than most women were, of course, but there was the way she sat, the way she held herself, the look in her eyes that screamed out that their user was confused as to the situation and had no idea whatsoever what was going on, or who these people were. There was also fear in those eyes. Iyre seemed to have a feeling that the girl wasn't afraid of the weapons in Matus' hand and Travis' hands, but of Travis himself, for some strange reason. She also noticed the girl was trembling visibly.

Travis bent his kneels to kneel beside the frightened girl and said, "It's okay, my dear, we're not going to hurt you. You can calm down."

The girl didn't seem to find any comfort in his words, and when he started actually talking to HER, she seemed to become even more alarmed, and pushed herself wobbily off the ground, and ran for all she was worth.

Travis stopped Matus when he turned to follow, and Matus growled, "Now she'll tell those masters of hers what she knows. What she's seen. We're done for."

But Travis was watched the girl for a moment, and said, "No, she won't. I think she can keep a secret just fine for a while. After all, what good will telling them do? Get her a few lashes, if anything. Its not as if she knows who or where we actually will be after this meeting."

Irye spoke, "But she'll tell them that we're in this city, and that will be enough to start a hunt for us."

Travis smiled and said, "Don't worry about that, Irye. Eveything's under control. I'm quite sure the only thing that will change after tonight is that we'll finally have what we came here to discuss in the first place, a link to the palace."

]]> ~cmccrrzy http://cmccrrzy.deviantart.com/journal/11084510/ http://cmccrrzy.deviantart.com/journal/11084510/ Sat, 16 Dec 2006 13:55:17 PST
Alfred thought she looked... right. As if she really belonged where she was. Back here again, home, at long last. Not in some... other world.

His heart was filling up as he took in the sight of her at long last. She was back! She was really back, and he could feel the tears he had been holding back starting to gather behind his eyes. But he couldn't cry, not now. In a little, when Beth wasn't there to see. Or when things had settled down a little.

Her clothes were so... different. Not her normal bright colors of red, white, and yellow. These were browns, with some white. She still wore gloves, he saw. Still as prim and proper as ever. Some of the time.

She closed her eyes, and breathed in hard, as if truly taking in it all, and let it out slowly. Then she opened her eyes, and looked up at the sun, smiling. She stood that way a moment, then looked back at Alfred, and he blinked in surprise as her face seemed to change, as if she had reached a decision. He didn't know what it could be, but... he had a bad feeling about whatever it was.

"Al, I... I have to go back."

Michael seemed to stiffen slightly, and Thomas swallowed. Michael seemed to stiffen behind Al as he stared at his sister wide-eyed and confused.

"What-What are you talking about?"

She sighed, softly, and shook her head, like she was scolding a small child. Actually, she almost was. Then she looked up at him, and her smile was gone. All that remained in its place was purpose, and a little sadness.

"Someone has to take all these monsters back, Al." She put her arm out to indicate the masses of twisted green and orange globs around the plane. "And there's no one else. I have to go Al. I'm sorry."

He couldn't stop them now, the tears started to come, and his face was shocked now. "NO!!! You just got back! You can't just leave again!!!" He ran towards her, and her face turned into one of surprise as he flung himself into her arms, holding her tightly, and sobbing into her shirt.

"Please don't leave me again." He whispered into her chest, still crying.

She was confused for a moment, then she put her own arms around him, and held him against her, just as dearly as he was her, and he felt just a little surprise at her embrace.

"I don't want to go Al. Truly, I don't. But I don't have a choice."

He sobbed out, "Yes you do! You don't have to go!"

She smiled sadly over his brightly haired head, and said, "Shh, shh, Al. You know that's not true. Do you want to send someone else? Michael? Thomas? Samantha? Karen? Would you go, if only it kept me here?"

He didn't say anything for a moment, having only one answer to that question, and just held her and cried. Then he said,

"I don't want you to go."

Beth was silent for a moment, having opened her mouth to reply, but had nothing to say. She seemed to stare out into space for a moment, then closed her eyes again, surprising Michael by letting tears, the first time he'd seen her cry, fall from her eyes.

"Al." she said, after a while, "I know. I KNOW. I don't want to leave. I want to stay here with you. With all our friends. I want to go home and see Granny, go and visit Clara, go see that old Farming Town that annoyed us so much with their weird philosophies."

That caused Al to smile after a moment. "Well, if you weren't so stubborn-" he began.

She grinned wickedly, her tears dissipating, "I am not stubborn!" She said, proudly.

He pushed her back, and said, "Big sis..."

Then he stopped, when he saw her face. The tears were still there, slowing, and he saw the pain and joy mixed together on her face. "Beth-" he started, but she put two fingers on his lips and shook her head.

"No, Al. No words of comfort, no, "See, I told you so!", no nothing. I couldn't bear it."

His expression became worried. "But you're-"

She smiled, and touched her face with her hand, wiping away the last tear, and glanced at it, then looked back at her brother. "What, this? Endrish used to tell me that giving whatever old life I had a good cry would probably help me get over it quicker. But I never did. Now... I know he was wrong."

Alfred was confused, and she smiled at him again. "Al, crying only makes me want to stay more, and I know I can't."

She leaned forward to kiss him on the forehead, and said into his hair, "I need to go, now. But I will come back. If I have to move heaven and hell to come, I swear I will, Al. I can't bear to be away anymore."

Al felt his tears come back, and Beth gave him one last hug before Michael and Thomas came over for him.... ]]> ~cmccrrzy http://cmccrrzy.deviantart.com/journal/11077410/ http://cmccrrzy.deviantart.com/journal/11077410/ Fri, 15 Dec 2006 20:16:56 PST
I got 3-9 of Ranma 1/2 today!

I tried this marshmellow thing today!

Hanukkah started today!

I read some Honor today!

Night! (Today!)

]]> ~cmccrrzy http://cmccrrzy.deviantart.com/journal/11065861/ http://cmccrrzy.deviantart.com/journal/11065861/ Thu, 14 Dec 2006 18:44:52 PST
He smiled as he watched her from the doorframe, silently. She still hadn't noticed he was there, she was so ensconced in her work.

She was so focused... so SET. She was in her normal position of course: her back firmly away from the back on the chair, one of her feet on the foot of the chair, thumping away a random beat, and the other set almost precariously on the floor (As the best descriptor) beside it, her left hand supported her cheek, and her fingers were laced through her hair. Her other hand was being followed by her blue eyes as it moved steadily sideways and downward in a methodical rythym.

He could hear her pencil scratching on the paper softly, it was so quiet in the room, and he took a moment to just gaze at her, and notice how the rays of sun fell neatly across her golden hair and nightgown, causing her body to appear to be glowing in the morning sunshine.

He loved when she was like this. Focused and working. He still believed she worked too hard, as a firm spouse should, but she was at her best in this state. At her most comfortable. She had said so herself, and it was obvious from the way she sat and wrote, now.

"A person starts to live when (s)he can live outside (her)himself." A quote from Albert Einstein... he smiled in brief memory at that meeting when she had told him that. That her obsession was nothing more than something to live for outside of life... outside of merely existing. Allowing others to live... creating worlds no one could ever dream of, characters people could believe in and be surprised by....

He must have made some sort of noise then, for she blinked, and glanced at him, truly surprised to find him standing there.

He smiled and scratched his head, "Sorry, love. I didn't mean to disturb you."

She smiled back at him. "It's okay. I'll beat you up for it later."

He grinned maliciously at her. "Is that a promise?"

She shook her head, and he came over to her, leanding down to kiss her on the lips and set his hand on her chairback. "Good morning, then." he said. "What are you writing?"

She glanced back at her work, wrote down two more words, and closed the cover. Then she smiled at his confused expression.

"Nothing dear. Nothing at all."

Then she kissed him, passionately, and he kissed back. She moved up into his arms, and they moved away from the table, leaving the room for a more... suitable.... one.

The sunlight played across the wooden table, and strayed across a light blue book cover, somewhat frayed by time, and revealed a small title, written down by a human hand and not a computer. It said,

"To Be. A Life's Journey by Stataline Crofferd."

]]> ~cmccrrzy http://cmccrrzy.deviantart.com/journal/11055200/ http://cmccrrzy.deviantart.com/journal/11055200/ Wed, 13 Dec 2006 19:21:00 PST
Like fragments of sunlight falling from some hidden window in my mind the memories come back... flooding my mind with a brief peace I have seldom been availed of, as of late.

I can barely see the faces now... It's been so long... I have to do the exercises more often, now. The name exercises. Reminding myself of my home, my family, my friends, the people who care about me and the people I hate.

The people who hate actually seem to keep more sane than those I don't. At least they aren't here. Probably wrapped up in some self-absorbed action that won't get them past their bedroom doors... the fat slobs...

But it's so hard, now... even their faces, once so strong in my mind, have begun to fade from my mind, and the names blur and twist...

Was Clair my mother's name? Or Michael's? Michael was my best friend... or was he my brother? Did I have a brother? Did I have any siblings? What were their names? Where did they live? What did they-

I shut my eyes as the tears course down my cheeks in the silent pain I refuse to voice. The questions whirl around my mind like an unending torrent.... I can't take it much longer.... But unless something drastic happens, I doubt I have much choice in the matter. If I escape, if Ron and the others come...

But that hope is small and distant in my mind, now. I don't even remember what Ron looks like. Or Sharon. Thomas, Katla, Little Gorgie... But for some reason, their names are like tiny beacons of hope in my heart and mind... and thinking about them, for some reason, finding me at long last is enough to warm my cold soul for a short while...

But then... he comes.

The warmth is stolen away, replaced by burning hate as I hear the door creak open, a noise that is only there to taunt and annoy me whenever HE opens the door. I know he does it to get at me... to make me want to tear out of my bonds and break the door down, crushing it to peices....

And he and I both know I can't, which makes him all the more happy, and me all the more ready to tear his head off his neck and stuff it down a toilet...

I cling to the hate and immense satisfaction brought on by the thought of watching his decapitated head swirl down a toilet drain as I hear him walk over to the column where I sit. I glance at the shadow he makes against the light of the door... a sight that burns my eyes even though I see it once every day... or at least I think it's that often... I can't even tell how long days are in this dungeon with no windows.... And the light could very well be artificial, made to confuse me in my weakness...

No matter... the darkness is eaten by that small light, and I keep track of his distance by his darkness upon it.

He stops just next to the pillar, and I wait, patiently, like a good little beaten prisoner.... and wait for him to come closer. He does, walking around to my side of the pillar, and, just as he comes two inches closer, I lunge out, pulling with all my might on the chains they use as my restraints...

The first few times I tried it G-d knows how long ago, I had some hope of actually getting him, hurting somehow... enough to get rid of me, let me go home, one less trouble on his list of whatever he does. I still refuse to believe that he's who he says he is. Still... I gave up my beliefs for this attack, and now do it solely to provoke him to kill me, if only to escape this place I call Hell.

But he won't kill me. Because I won't hurt him in any way, and he enjoys his.... TIME... with me to no limit....

As always, he's close enough to fool me into believing he's close enough, but is too far away, and takes an extra step back, just in case.

Like a angry dog on a leash I pull at my restraints, snarling as I lunge for him with all my might.... Just beyond my reach, damn him.

"Still angry, are we, Shelly? Not good form, if you ask me. I just have SO much planned for you today."

I hate it when he calls me Shelly. I ABHORE it. A name floats to my mind along with long golden brown hair, a pure white smile, green eyes, and gentle hands. Johnny... he used to call me that...

I snarl back at him, but refuse to speak, keeping my insults for what I know is soon to come. What I secretly fear even if I act like I couldn't care less...

He shakes his head again, like he's scolding a little girl who doesn't understand anything about the world.

"Oh, Shelly... what will we do with you? Still refusing to give up those names, I see. Well, we'll just have to fix that, won't we?"

Then, I don't know how, he causes three goons of his to suddenly appear out of nowhere, without my knowledge, and they grab me, like so many times before.

I squirm, knowing full w... ]]> ~cmccrrzy http://cmccrrzy.deviantart.com/journal/11008643/ http://cmccrrzy.deviantart.com/journal/11008643/ Sat, 09 Dec 2006 17:18:58 PST
Lawrence remarked mentally on the fact that she seemed so calm, so focused. Strange, for a woman who had just switched sides, again, so dramatically. He wondered if this was who she TRULY was, or if it was just another cover up for her schemes, even if the men behind her obviously meant business, staring coldly from the wall behind her.

He didn't spend long contemplating about them. He realized that that was because of the woman. She just... commanded all attention with her prescence. No one could deny that command, and Lawrence wondered for a minute what would happen to the person who dared.

She turned her glance to look at him herself, and he was confronted with two light blue eyes. Odd for a woman that controlled fire so well. He blinked, and frowned slightly. He could have sworn the sides of her mouth had nearly curved into a smile just now...

But she was back to staring blandly at Carson. He had come out of the door where he had been talking to one of the police officers. Lawrence heard a soft "bang" of a door shutting, and assumed the officer had left after being left in the dust by Carson's incredible mind.

"So," He said. "From the beginning?"

]]> ~cmccrrzy http://cmccrrzy.deviantart.com/journal/10999203/ http://cmccrrzy.deviantart.com/journal/10999203/ Fri, 08 Dec 2006 19:48:58 PST
She didn't turn around for a while, and waited for him.

But he seemed at a loss for words. It had been a long time... she was so much... MORE now. How could he tell her...?

Then she chuckled, and he blinked in surprise.

"It's all right. I know. I've known ever since I got back. You haven't been that careful about your feelings, you know."

He felt himself blushing slightly at her words, which was simply ludicrous! He had no reason to-...

She turned around, and he gulped, as he realized she could see his blush, and smiled at him, making his cheeks become darker.

She shook her head, and walked towards him, stopping only half a foot away. He could hear her soft breathing, now, she was so close.

She rubbed her arm, and he could swear she was FIDGETING. How was she so nervous after being so calm before?

"Truth is," she started, "I'm still a little scared myself about all of this. I was MARRIED, after all. Sure, it was over five hundred years ago... but I still loved him. Very much."

Her eyes seem to go foggy for a moment, and he could tell she was remembering something, looking at something only she could see, beyond his understanding, probably. And yet... he felt a sadness in her voice. The sadness that had always been just below the surface whenever she spoke to him about her life for the past five centuries. But then... she had married a mortal.

The moment went away, and she shook her head hard, as if shaking something off of her that she found undesirable or in the way. Then she looked at him.

"I never wanted to betray his love. Ever. I thought that his death would still keep us bonded. It has, in a way. I remember him. I still love him. But... that is all in the past."

She smiled at him.

"I will always love him, and he will always hold a place in my heart, as do Niria, Oklis, Gataro, Ronni, and Tisara." She touched her hand to her heart, and seemed to hesitate for just a moment.

"And... so will you."

He blinked in surprise.

She smiled at him again, and took his right hand in her own, and pressed it to her breast, cupping it with her other hand as well.

"Don't you understand, yet, Osiwaru? Can't you see that maybe I'm just as in love with you as you are with me?"

He was frozen for a while, and was only shocked out of his shock when he saw tears flowing from her eyes as she watched him, still holding his hand in hers. He hesitated one last time, then he took his left hand, and brushed away the tears on her right cheek, letting his hand remain there when he finished, feeling the warmth of her skin, and the fire that was suddenly in his heart.

She blinked in surprise at his touch, then let go of his right hand to press her hands against his left and snuggled her cheek into his palm, closing her eyes like a contented child, letting the tears flow down her cheeks in happy silence.

He put his right arm around her waist, and pulled her against him, resting his hand on her hair. She let go of his hand, and put her arms around him, clasping the fabric of his shirt for dear life as she pressed her face into his shoulder, sobbing, now.

His left hand was around her waist, and he petted her hair, gently, letting tears of his own fall. He couldn't quite understand why. Perhaps it was because he realized how much time he had wasted in their lives hanging on to his Elvish pride. Perhaps it was because the sensation of FINALLY holding her against him was so intense, or perhaps it was just because he was starting to get a wet shirt and this wasn't really how he planned this to happen, anyway.

Whatever the reason, he let the tears fall until they stopped, which took only a few minutes. A few wonderful, glorious minutes, in which they stood against each other, feeling the other's warmth and comfort, reaching out from the loneliness that had both had for so long.

Then he took his right hand, pushing away from her, just slightly, so that there was a slight space between them, and used his hand to tilt her chin up, just slightly, to look at him.

Tear tracks remained on her face, and her eyes were slightly red from crying so much. Her hair was also still a little ruffled from the earlier excitement in the day, and there were one or two small specks of dirt still on her face.

To him, she was the most beautiful creature on the face of the earth.

He moved his face towards her, and their lips touched. They held together that way for a moment, and then he backed slightly away. But she came towards HIM, right after, pressing her lips against his, and they stood that way even longer than before, that small cont... ]]> ~cmccrrzy http://cmccrrzy.deviantart.com/journal/10975334/ http://cmccrrzy.deviantart.com/journal/10975334/ Wed, 06 Dec 2006 17:43:51 PST
But it wasn't his fault!

He hadn't known the island was a deathtrap just waiting for outsiders to enter it. He didn't know about the odd looking boar-like creatures and the great birds or the snakes, the insects, the vegetation... Computers couldn't tell you everything!

He sighed, and his hard glare lessened, somewhat, as he accepted that fact, truly. Computers couldn't tell you everything. Hardly anything, seemingly. Movies didn't even come close to knowing about the true things that lurked in the unexplored jungles of the world...

He didn't know why, but his mind suddenly showed him two bright blue eyes, gazing at him out of pale skin and from under long, dark hair, from only a few feet away.

The strange woman... he had almost forgotten her.... Who was she? Where had she come from? What was she doing there? Waiting for him to get into trouble? Where was she now?

Questions lit across his scientific mind, and his brows knit together, as he approached a new problem that he wanted solved and forgot the shouting match he had had with the general only a short while ago.

They hadn't known about any natives on the island before they came here, and no one but he even knew there were any. No one had believed him when he told them about her. He snorted at the memories of his confession on who had killed the boar-thing....

A girl appearing out of nowhere? A savage from the shadows? Waving an ancient SPEAR? A human living HERE? Puh-lease! Impossible!

Of course... thought of logically, it wasn't exactly IMPOSSIBLE that someone else had gotten here before the scientists had. Unlikely, perhaps, but not entirely impossible.

Still... her reasons for being there were as unknown to him even if he hadn't accepted that fact before. It seemed his amazon from the shadows would plague him for a while longer. If only he could talk to the woman! Ask her about the island... the animals, the plants, herself....

He blushed slightly at that last part. He briefly thought on the old legends about Amazons being startingly beautiful women living away from all humanity.... In other words, finding them would make the wet dreams of any man (or woman) paling illusions against the real thing... And the stranger had been extremely beautiful.

Imagine his surprise when said woman dropped down abruptly in front of him, pointing his spear on top of his nose.

"Human. Get off of my island."

]]> ~cmccrrzy http://cmccrrzy.deviantart.com/journal/10964223/ http://cmccrrzy.deviantart.com/journal/10964223/ Tue, 05 Dec 2006 18:24:23 PST
Hot water trickled down from her forehead to her check, curving around her eye.

THOCK, THOCK, BAM, BAM...

She ran through the cycle in her head every now and then, although she had done the exercise so often that she only did it over routine, and not out of a need to stay in order.

THOCK, THOCK, BAM, BAM...

Kick, kick, punch, punch. Odd that her hands seemed harder than her feet. Although, from the chips that exploded from the beam as her leg flew away from it and back into another kick, one couldn't really tell.

THOCK, THOCK, BAM...

One couldn't really tell anything about the woman throwing the powerful blows at the inanimate and helpless pole of wood.


THOCK, THOCK, BAM...

One couldn't tell much at all...

BAM!!!

Her hand rested against the pole for a moment, as she huffed slightly, barely getting a work out from her "exercise".

Aren glanced at her from his meditation when he realized the sound of her exercises had come to a sudden stop.

HUFF--HUFF

What was she doing here? Why was she doing thing? What was the point? It didn't matter anymore... She couldn't protect him then... couldn't save him....

BAM!!!!

She felt the pole move back an inch or so with the force of that one. Aren frowned, now.

"Kiri?" he asked.

She couldn't let her thoughts return to that... not now... she was getting over it. She was! She knew it... But... why? Why was she holding up this pathetic charade?

BAMBAMBAMBAM!!!!

A trickle of blood drifted down her knuckles, and a hole was starting to form in the wood.

Why?

BAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAM!!!!

THOCKBAMTHOCKTHOCKBAMTHOCKTHOCKBAMBAM!!!!

She went from a few quick strikes to rapid blows, one after another, moving from kick to punch in movements too fast for the eye to follow. The pole shouldn't have been able to stand if. Of course, she was also moving too fast for the pole to even "realize" it was being pummeled so hard....

Others took notice of the sudden noise increase, and come over to watch. Aren was still standing where he was, at the back of the thickening throng, utterly confused.

BAMBAMBAMBAM!!!

She was mainly on punched now, and then, suddenly, she jumped up , twisting around like a top OVER the pole, which stood a good 13 feet high, and slammed a kick into the top, landing on the other side gently on her feet, seemingly, but sending up dust clouds, and moving back into a hard punch.

BAMBAM!!!

There were oohs and awes from the crowd, and some wows. Especially when the top three feet of the pole fell off from her blow.

She was entirely on punches now, ramming the pole with no mercy.

She didn't even realize the crowd was THERE. She didn't care anymore. She was ramming away at her frustration, her anger, her HATE...

Her fear...

BAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAM!!!

Aren pushed his way to the front and heard whispered, "Is that smart? She looks like she's gonna get hurt... I don't think that's safe."

He got out to the front and stared for a moment at the cold-blooded woman's fury....

Strange though it sounded, that was the best description. Her face was absolutely expressionless as she hammered at the pole mercilessly...

But Aren could feel it. Like a blinding inferno, rising out from a whirlwind of darkness...

Hate. Anger... WRATH....

But why?

BAMBAMBA-

She stopped so abruptly that someone actually fell over from being so focused.

She stood there, frozen for a moment. Then Aren saw the blood.

It covered her hands like a slime, and dripped to the ground.

]]> ~cmccrrzy http://cmccrrzy.deviantart.com/journal/10929507/ http://cmccrrzy.deviantart.com/journal/10929507/ Sat, 02 Dec 2006 20:33:25 PST
The man sounded insane, almost, as he shouted the commands at the woman standing halfway between him and the group of people. She didn't seem to give any sign that she had heard him, but Jacob was starting to dought less and less that she wouldn't obey him, and he hated that doughtlessness more than the man causing it to be in his mind.

Becuase he knew what would happen if Talia did what she was told to do. He knew, because it had happened to him, and he had narrowly come out of the ordeal with the success of regaining his sanity.

And that was what Talia would lose, if she came any closer. If she took that step toward the small group of fighters, away from the man she was sworn to kill, away from a life of hate and pain, and towards a life and utter self-loathing and mental pain.

The truth was, Talia was one of the GOOD people. One of those special few who were TRULY good, not just people who said they were, but lacked all the traits of such people.

She had tried to hide it from Jacob. Hell, she had tried to hide it from everyone. She might have succeeded, too. After all, her pain and her hate were real and truly reasonable. She had gone through more pain and hardship than even Jacob could imagine; an ordeal that one would expect would leave a person embittered, cold as ice, and hard as steel.

Talia had shown that kind of a personality, along with some signs of true insanity, as well; as if the realities of her life were starting to have a TRUE effect on her, and her sanity was already slipping away.

It had been, actually. She had been losing hope steadily as she stayed with Jacob and his friends. Having confirmed her companions deaths, Talia had come to the brink of madness, and Jacob knew that they had only seen a microscopic part of her torment. God only knew what she was experiencing in the confines of her mind every second of the day... the loneliness, the sadness, the fear, the hate, the pain, the crushing emptiness and hopelessness of her life...

She had lost it... had gone berserk and killed with a brutality and ruthlessness no one could label as "righteous", no matter how criminal the victims had been, or how truly good Talia was. At that time, Jacob had truly come to terms with the fact that Talia was something of a cold-blooded killer. She wouldn't go on a rampage, wouldn't kill for the fun of it. She would succeed in whatever kills she went on, she was so good, but she would try her utmost to kill no one that didn't have to die.

And Jacob had seen another aspect of her when he realized that. The cold-bloodedness, the ruthlessness, the precision. Like the weapon she had been molded to become, she was slowly losing herself to what the disgusting cowardly scientists of the Rosenfit organization had designed her to be. Had PERFECTED her to be.

And that made her loathe herself more.

Jacob stood before the group, where he had been standing as he tried to get Rosenfit to shut up, and to reason with Talia. Where he had been standing because he felt that he could stop her, make her remember who she was, cause whatever part of her was left in that seemingly emotionless head of hers to wake up or come back to life.

But she hadn't responded. Had only looked at him with those now-dull eyes and emotionless face, and not even twitched at his words.

It had torn him apart.

He had tried to reason with her at first. Tried to call her back, remind her who she was, anything! Then he had gotten harsher, told her she was an idiot for letting Rosenfit control like this, for not killing him outright. Goddamit, woman, why don't you just turn around and blow the bastard off the face of the earth with the bedamned gadgets you were given, you coward!

He had insulted her, commanded her, begged her...

All the while trying to find her again, trying to deny the fact that he didn't care if he lived or died, if his friends lived or died, if anyone else lived or died... all that mattered was that Talia come back to herself again... be the woman she was, not the toy killing machine she had become.

Because Jacob just loved her so much. He had been slow to realize it, slow to come to grips with it. Slow to accept it, and embrace it.

She had been in love with someone. Had told Jacob about him. How he was so kind, so gentle. How he had died protecting her, and she would do all she could, even if she had to die herself, to avenge him.

Jacob had respected her grief, her pain, her ANGER. So he didn't invade her world with his love. Didn't break into her life with THAT complication. She didn't need it. No matter how much he wanted to, he knew he would only hurt her with the effort.

And now... as he looked at the pale killing machine before her, he knew his... ]]> ~cmccrrzy http://cmccrrzy.deviantart.com/journal/10917095/ http://cmccrrzy.deviantart.com/journal/10917095/ Fri, 01 Dec 2006 18:52:39 PST
She leaped OVER the disc, sumersaulting in mid-air over the disc in one blurred motion to land on her feet with her back to it behind it, spun around, and threw her knife straight at it in a move too fast for the eye to follow.

The end result was... interesting. The disc had apparently detected her jump, and was just about to come back as she threw the knife, proppelling itself straight FOR the knife, and thus impaling itself on the knife, and being pushed backwards by the force of the throw into a pillar against the wall behind, the knife ramming into it, buring itself in the marble pillar. After a moment, the disc cracked in two around the blade, and the two halves fell with a clatter from the blade to the floor, leaving the dagger embedded in the pillar almost up to the hilt.

It took Henrietta a moment to realize that she had been holding her breath. She quickly released it, and was surprised to realize that her companions had been doing likewise.

Bethany was still standing in her throwing position, her left hand out where it had released the knife, and her back arched for the throw. She stayed like that a moment more, then returned to a normal standing position. She fixed a loose hair on her brow, and looked at the broken discs at her feet. There was no smile on her face. No feeling of victory or the sadness of an end to a battle... just... contemplation, seemingly, as if she had been testing for something and was now considering her results.

It was the Queen who started clapping first, then Henrietta and the two brothers followed suite. Henrietta knew they didn't clap, but upon glancing at Karen's guard, she saw a proud gleam in the woman's eye, of approval, awe, and wariness.

Bethany looked over at them, seemingly not quite surprised they were there, but a little surprised they clapped, perhaps. She tilted her head slightly, in what Henrietta thought could have been something of a bow or thank you. Then she walked over to them, and said (causing Henrietta to grin inwardly),

"Welcome to my quarters, your majesty. Forgive me for keeping you waiting. It was unfair of me."

]]> ~cmccrrzy http://cmccrrzy.deviantart.com/journal/10895105/ http://cmccrrzy.deviantart.com/journal/10895105/ Wed, 29 Nov 2006 20:00:00 PST
Henrietta didn't say anything, and neither did the Queen. William and Alex seemed content to follow their example, as did the others.

They watched her for a few minutes, just sit there, absolutely still. The stillness allowed Henrietta to realize that her usual pentad was standing guard on the edges of the room, standing in the shadows (what had masked them from her vision) to guard their empress. They regarded the visitors warily, their eyes flickers of fire in the darkness.

They waited.

Eventually, Bethany must have given some signal that did not appear in Henrietta's sight, because one of the guards moved, as if he had been called, and took a step forward. He then held out some sort of remote, and pressed a button.

It was at that moment that Henrietta realized that there were eight small discs lying before Bethany on the floor, motionless. She used that word to regard them because the instant she realized they were there, they floated upward with a soft whir, coming to rest at eye level to the sitting woman.

Bethany still didn't move. Henrietta also noticed the small knife sitting just before the woman's legs, seemingly waiting for her to grab it.

Then the discs must have been activated again by something, because spikes, very thin, pointy, SHARP, spikes, zipped out of the discs to form a circle around the edge of each disk, creating eight dark, pointed circles in the light.

Bethany did not twitch. She was silent, and did not open her eyes. She almost appeared asleep, yet Henrietta did not believe someone could be that... rigid... in sleep. That ready. She didn't know what was to happen, but she did understand that this was not a surprise to the woman on the floor.

Then the bladed discs zipped straight for the woman. Eveyone would have instantly feared the woman's safety, had they been fast enough to do so.

They weren't.

Bethany didn't open her eyes, but, just as the blades were only a foot away from her, she rolled over, impossibly rapidly uncrossing her legs and grabbing the knife at the same time as her hands went out. The discs zipped straight through where she once was, as the woman rolled away further, and stopped on the palms of her hands, her knife against the ground, her legs sprawled (really set, but sprawled was the only word Henrietta could think of since they were set so she would be ready for any change in the disc's direction) behind her.

She did a small jump into a crouch, holding the knife before her, her eyes still closed. The discs floated in the air, and the woman opened her eyes.

The twin blue pools looked out at the discs, seemingly emotionless. But Henrietta thought she could catch what seemed to be a sort of felineness in them, as if she was a hunter that had finally spotted her prey.

They seemed to regard each other for a moment, discs and woman, like two enemies or assasins from millenia passed, staring each other down in a battle of wills. Or, as Henrietta realized, like that ancient term, Cowboys, staring each down in a final showdown. The room almost seemed like a town from the "Old West", with everyone hiding from the two dangerous shooters, as they watched each other from either end of a dusty street. Henrietta would not have been surprised if a "dust ball" had swept between the two at that moment, the situation was so similar. But one didn't, and she merely wondered who would end up shooting first, for that was probably a good term, even though the discs for mindless and Bethany didn't have a gun, Henrietta knew that both were quite lethal at the moment.

It was the discs that took the first shot. They zoomed for her, and she waited, again, for the last moment, and spun away to her right, missing getting pinned by inches, and taking a swipe at the discs with her blade at the same time. One fell to the floor, lifeless. Henrietta raised her eyebrows in true surprise. One swipe took down one of them? Amazing...

But the battle was far from over. The discs ignored their "fallen comrade" and went back for the woman again, who ducked, and rolled, coming to her feet at last, her back to the group. The discs spun around, whirring in midair, and raced for her. She jumped right over them, rolling as she fell. She had also taken the time to take another swipe at the buggers in her leap, bringing another disc down. The six remaining discs whirred in midair for a moment, then "leaped" with fresh vigor into the battle once more.

The rest mainly involved more dives and spins by the discs, which increased in speed and precision every time, and numerous ducks, spins, jumps, leaps, swipes, and rolls, by Bethany.

It was al... ]]> ~cmccrrzy http://cmccrrzy.deviantart.com/journal/10880179/ http://cmccrrzy.deviantart.com/journal/10880179/ Tue, 28 Nov 2006 14:40:51 PST
Um... first time here. In case anyone keeping score... yeah...

So... life as I know it? Why I decided to waste more of my time to create a new thing for myself I will probably never use in the first place because I'm too daunted by the terms of use for entering any of my pathetically drawn so-called peices of art in the first place?

You know, I actually know the answer. And THAT, friend, is what scares me a helluva lot more than the answer itself...

Then again... maybe not.

The answer, you ask? But I already forgot the question...

Anyway, this looks cool, and I want to put some art up... after I get the courage to read through the EXTREMELY LONG agreement this site obviously wisely put up for its artists protection and knowledge.

Anyway... I say that I lot. I wonder how many "anyways" I've typed into livejournal?

Oh well...

Hello world! Brittany is in da house!

]]> ~cmccrrzy