http://search.deviantart.com/?q=by:coachman&section=today deviantART RSS for by:coachman en-us Copyright 2009, deviantART.com Sun, 06 Dec 2009 12:40:51 PST deviantART.com http://blogs.law.harvard.edu/tech/rss http://s.deviantart.com/minish/widgets/apple-touch-icon-precomposed.png http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/28272446/ http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/28272446/ Tue, 10 Nov 2009 15:24:31 PST
I don't know, might be an art-slump or something, but it angers me so badly that I look at my work and I see all the things my former teachers in photography would point out and nag about, and yet I can't avoid those things.

And not to say that my portraits are ugly, 'casuse I've gotten the chance to work with some really beautiful people the last week! But I feel that should be contributing something as well...

]]> ~coachman http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/27489245/ http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/27489245/ Tue, 29 Sep 2009 16:01:59 PDT I feel kinda stupid.







]]> ~coachman http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/27124826/ http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/27124826/ Wed, 09 Sep 2009 23:01:04 PDT should pack my bag or something like that...
It's my third lesson at the university - ever - and second one in the particular course. I'm not as nervous as last time, but that's mainly because I've gotten this big, awful cold. It kinda takes the breath out of it... So to say.

I pity the poor boys and girls sitting next to me >

]]> ~coachman http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/25408504/ http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/25408504/ Fri, 19 Jun 2009 04:52:29 PDT

Heading towards a new identity crise, I'm unemployed but did survive graduation! Woho for me

]]> ~coachman http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/24818017/ http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/24818017/ Mon, 18 May 2009 07:45:24 PDT
Thank you. I handed all the assignments for photo-class today for the last review-thíngy. My dad spent several hours trying to get all the files down on a cd for me. Walking home from school today I felt upwards 'cause it was finished and done.
But oh no. My teacher just called and asked me to come in as soon as possible since his computer wasn't able to read the cd.


Sorry for lack of comments and love, I'll transform back into a human after graduation

]]> ~coachman http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/24363071/ http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/24363071/ Tue, 21 Apr 2009 15:48:23 PDT
Where did all the time disappear?

]]> ~coachman http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/23393833/ http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/23393833/ Wed, 25 Feb 2009 06:02:32 PST Then why aren't I working with something right now? Well, because I'm ready to move over my pictures, but there's only one "memory", which only one person can use at a time...
So I'm doing nothing. Finnito.

No, I'm not bored.


...

]]> ~coachman http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/22774286/ http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/22774286/ Sat, 24 Jan 2009 04:20:36 PST
Macintosh does not work well with me, but this one... I love it. The screen is wide and shiny and clear and... It wants to follow me home xD

Just sharing my experience ;D

]]> ~coachman http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/22651086/ http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/22651086/ Sun, 18 Jan 2009 11:12:14 PST luinathiel almost a year ago... So eight aleatory (?) facts about me then?

- I don't eat cold food. Sweet things like icecream, cakes and similar is okay, but food like cold pasta, cold meat or sushi is almost repulsive when entering my mouth. I fear cheese and prefer to not touch it if it isn't necessary
- I have an alomost "real" phobia for spiders. I actually had nightmares after watching the first Bond-movie.
- I tend to get angry and dislike friends who's being close to me for more than a week. It's been very trying for me to have friends stay over for more than one week. Although, I wont be having any trouble with people as long as I get a couple of hours to myself once in a while : )
- I love candy. And something of an addict, unfortunately for me. I had six months completely without candy which was very healthy but very boring.
- I've been singing in the youthchoir in the cathedral of Gothenburg for ten years.
- My smallest toes' nails look like small claws .___. '
- I barely can sing alone, solo, in front of people. As soon as I know that someone can hear me specifically my voice dies ><
- Ehm... ehm... I wanted to be a gardener as a kid but can't keep the simplest plant alive anymore.

]]> ~coachman http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/22543775/ http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/22543775/ Mon, 12 Jan 2009 13:32:20 PST
]]> ~coachman http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/21672502/ http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/21672502/ Tue, 25 Nov 2008 22:03:52 PST I decide to write an entry in this journal. 'Cause i certainly do wonder .____. '

When talking about sleep, haven't been doing that properly the last couple of weeks. Stupid? Yes. But it's been okay since "older friends" has paid some attention and I haven't felt as boring as usual which have resulted in me being... not happy, but more positive

Things with and in school are still tough but I'm trying to manage. I don't have much choice...
The choir on the other hand is tiring and timeconsuming but still very nice. We have our three first Luciaconcerts next week, then the week after it's one more here in Gothenburg, and the day after we're off to Liverpool.

And I had the worst experience this night. Seeing as I have trouble falling to sleep (lifelong issue ) I tried to settle down with reading last night. I'm reading " Let the right one come in " by Ajvide and damn, it's good. Not cheezy like Twilight, but still very enjoyable.
Although, a bit icky sometimes but it's been okay, manageable. Until last night. I actually had to stop reading and cried a little, forcing my self to read from Gravitation(Maki Murakami) and Lord John (Diana Gabaldon) to like... not be so sad.
And it was probably a part that few else will react to..

Weeeei, schoool... .____. '

]]> ~coachman http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/21387289/ http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/21387289/ Sat, 08 Nov 2008 15:55:46 PST
001. Real name → Elisabeth
002. Nickname → Eli, Elis, 'Dara, Asha, Fia, Elsa
003. Status → Single
004. Zodiac sign → Capricorn
005. Male or female → Female
006. Elementary → Vättnedal / Gamla Påvelund
007. Middle School → Gamla Påvelund/Nya Påvelund
008. High School → Nya Påvelund / Schillerska gymnasiet ( the swedish "gymnasium" is more like college, but also equivalent with the american Highschool. Big confusion)
009. Smart → Not very bright
010. Hair color → Strawberry (blond)
011. Long or short → To the shoulders? ^^
012. Loud or Quiet → Me? Depends on the company.. In school loud, with older friends quiet.
013. Sweats or Jeans → Jeans
014. Phone or Camera → Phone ;__;
015. Health freak → I should be...
016. Drink or Smoke? → Sometimes, but not regulary
017. Do you have a crush on someone? → That's complicated...
018. Eat or Drink → These questions are really odd written...
019. Piercings → Ears, traditional kind
020. Tattoos → Planned

FIRSTS:
023. First piercing → When I was eleven or twelwe? Second time, same spot when I was fifteen.
024. First best friend → Elina, since birth
025. First award → Don't think I have ever gotten one.
026. First crush → When did they air DarkwingDuck for the first time?
027. First pet → Musen, I guess. Cat my parents adopted a year before I was born. A year after my birth Musen had three kittens with Prince, one of three we still have.
028. First big vacation → 2007, Mallorca.
030. First big birthday → The first one, I think. And sixteenth, for some reason.

CURRENTLY:
049. Eating → Nothing
050. Drinking → Nothing
052. I'm about to → fetch a glass of wine
053. Listening to → "Fields of gold" - Eva Cassidy
054. Plans for today → The day is soon to be over... But tomorrow I'll have to take a look at schoolstuff, photography and help with the garden.
55. Waiting for → some peace of mind, helping with desert.

YOUR FUTURE:
058. Want kids? → I don¨t think I'd fit as a parent...
059. Want to get married? → Let's hope
060. Careers in mind → Waiter?

WHICH IS BETTER WITH GIRL/BOY?
068. Lips or eyes → Idk...
070. Shorter or taller? → Taller (rarely happens...)
072. Romantic or spontaneous → - ....
073. Nice stomach or nice arms → - ....
074. Sensitive or loud → ...
075. Hook-up or relationship → Relationship.
077. Trouble maker or hesitant → - ...

HAVE YOU EVER:
080. Lost glasses/contacts → No.
081. Run away from home → I tried once
084. Broken someones heart → Yes.
085. Been arrested → No.
087. Cried when someone died → Yes.

DO YOU BELIEVE:
089. Yourself → Not really...
090. Miracles → ...
091. Love at first sight → Idk...
092. Heaven or reincarnation → Reincarnation scares me B:
093. Santa Claus → Naw...
094. Sex on the first date → It's up to each and everyone, but I don't think it's best thing to do first, no.
095. Kiss on the first date → "Been there, done that"

ANSWER TRUTHFULLY:
097. Is there one person you want to be with right now → Many, I guess.
098. Are you seriously happy with where you are in life → No, not now.
099. Do you believe in God → Yes.

]]> ~coachman http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/21302474/ http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/21302474/ Mon, 03 Nov 2008 15:11:08 PST [link]

!

]]> ~coachman http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/20791668/ http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/20791668/ Thu, 02 Oct 2008 11:17:46 PDT luinathiel

I don't really know how to tell you this, but I'm in love with your sister. I think I realized it that night In your closet and I saw you ignore the crazy monk. I'm sure you're frostbitten enough to understand that we're cousins. I'm returning your ring to you, but I'll keep your neighbour Martin as a memory. You should also know that I never openly mocked a passionate interest for mice .

Best regards,
Elisabeth

----

I think that ~Skuggestalt, ~Ibaraz, ~Lovodnia and ~Neho should do this too ^^ The rules can be found back at [link] ('cause I'm an lazy ass )

]]> ~coachman http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/20317803/ http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/20317803/ Thu, 04 Sep 2008 01:19:12 PDT
]]> ~coachman http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/19502907/ http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/19502907/ Sun, 20 Jul 2008 15:55:36 PDT So now I'm making my own. Moahaha.

No, sorry, don't hesitate with the journals. This is a subtle hint to why I'm slow with commenting and so on. And I'll answer the last tag soon, promise.

I accidentially pinned, or more exactly; crushed, my finger today. Okay, not crushed but it felt like it... Hurts to type...
And since the people I waited for has gone to bed I probably should too. Early morning tomorrow, again. Taking it easy on summervacation, my ass.

( And I'm so grateful to Karl right now. He reminded me of music I haven't listened to for a long time )

]]> ~coachman http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/19222382/ http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/19222382/ Sat, 05 Jul 2008 16:55:43 PDT
If you comment on this journal I will:
a) tell you why I friended you (if I have),
b) associate you with something - fandom, a song, a colour, a photo, etc.,
c) tell you something I like about you,
d) tell you a memory I have of you,
e) ask something I've always wanted to know about you,
f) tell you my favorite pic of yours


Edit:


Think pink [link]

]]> ~coachman http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/19096148/ http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/19096148/ Sat, 28 Jun 2008 16:39:42 PDT
Summervacation since a couple of weeks ago and it feels.. empty. Not that I'm complaining, it's wonderful to be free of homework and stuff, but seeing as I got really sick last week I haven't been the happiest person on earth. I also started working at my "summerjob" this week, still sick, and it's been trying (I stay home for less sickness than I've had the past weeks). I also messed up the a big counting which slowed down the inventory, stock-taking, this friday (Sjaz, the night before was when I said I had bad vibes about going to work x'D ). It sucked a lot, I felt like crying and I think that I developed a fever just due to the stress and angst XD I'm pathetic, oh yeah

Otherwise... I'm so very confused when it comes to friends and love and all that stuff... I actually opened up about the past big happenings for a person I hadn't met in ages and doesn't really trust just because I'd had it all pented up inside for so long (and I was still sick, tired, stressed, nervous and had some alcohol in me, but still. I wasn't drunk, just tired ).
Photography is slow due to sickness, work and my desire for taking pictures where I'll need models. But everyone's busy, away or not interested so... .____. '

On the brighter side, I think that I have moved on a bit, concerning old highschool memories. Not entirely, but defenietly a step in the right direction.

(And the little smilie thing isn't working...)

]]> ~coachman http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/18924023/ http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/18924023/ Thu, 19 Jun 2008 04:57:45 PDT government is) stupid as hell. I don't understand how they seriously could legalize the FRA-law! Too angry and disappointed to function



And this damn cold. Argh, kill me

]]> ~coachman http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/18700710/ http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/18700710/ Fri, 06 Jun 2008 16:19:31 PDT
Mostly of the photographing last weeks have been social and private. Graduation-parties and some from school just for fun (one day, we will graduate too. At least that's what we believe ).

And I think I got one of the most kind comments today. Without warning, no particular catalyst. A classmate that I don't know that well, sent me a message telling me that she thought that I tried to picture people beautiful, or as I saw them. And for that she respected me.
This sounds really... odd, but then again I can't put together a sentence anymore. But I'm so happy for what she said, for in these times in total unsecurity it's a great comfort to hear real things like that.

Thank you (I just sound a little bit corny, eh?)

]]> ~coachman http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/18439953/ http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/18439953/ Wed, 21 May 2008 23:23:34 PDT And in english I even got a high point! 9 out of 10 Considering how I had given up do ever be able to perform my skills for the teacher, it's good. Much better than I had expected!

Still having the psychology essay (should be handed in tomorrow) and.. geography... and so on .___. ' But I don't care (right now)

Also, I saw SweeneyTodd at the opera here in Gothenburg with Sjazna and more happy people, and I loved it ^^ Everything to the choreography to their accents and waay of using their voices. The music, humor, yes <3 I do fear though to watch the movie with Depp and Bonham Carter now, but still thrilled to see it anyway ^^

]]> ~coachman http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/18397702/ http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/18397702/ Mon, 19 May 2008 11:45:00 PDT ~Character Quiz~

List Ten Characters/People

1. Tolouse ( Vampirehunter, LesMisérables)
2. Adara (Knight, RedWall)
3. Chester (Priest, Courtlife)
4. Saurchil (Darkelf, Eurasin)
5. Fingal (Courtlife)
6. Asha (Goth, Gulli)
7. Dora (Hermia)
8. Vidar (Alf)
9. Iská (Angel )
10. Rowena (nowadays )


What Would you do If...

1 (Tolouse) woke you up in the middle of the night?

Get surprised and scared x'D

2 (Adara) asked you to go out with her?

Get very flattered, but be forced to decline

3 (Chester) wandered into your house without permission?

Scare him ^^

4 (Saurchil) announced that they were going to marry 9 (Iska) tomorrow?

Wonder what Saurchil was planning to do with Iska, and if Iska thought it to be a good deed to marry Saurchil x'D Or wonder if Iska knew about it at all...

5 (Fingal) cooked you a romantic meal of baked beans on toast?

Wonder, wonder and wonder again. Be a bit flattered again by the fact that he poisons me instead of throwing me out of a window...

6 (Asha) was lying next to you on the beach, fast asleep?

Photograph him and then put a towel over him in case of sun and heat ^^

7 (Dora) suddenly confessed to being part of your family?

Just stare .___. ' And be proud when the schock had fallen ^^ '

8 (Vidar) got himself into hospital?

Worry enormously and yell at his guardians (He's blind...)

9 (Iska) made fun of your friends?

Be very surprised, wonder ih he was posessed and then laugh. I'm evil ^^

10 (Rowena) ignored you all the time?

Ignore her back ^3^

You get to meet either 1 (Tolouse) or 6 (Asha). Who do you pick?

Ah, difficult choice :S Asha ^^ But Tolouse would be nice.... if he was sober... And wouldn't stab me...

5 (Fingal) and 3 (Chester) get extremely drunk and crash at your house. What do you do?

Put Fingal in my bed, Chester in the sofa, sigh loudly and I'd sleep in the armchair next to the sofa

All the characters in this quiz protest outside your house. What do you do?

Well... try to hide... Saurchil's with them, and so is Tolouse...

What Would they do under the Following Circumstances...

Two serial killers were hunting you down. What would 1 (Tolouse) do?

Shake his head ”It's not a vampire... ”. Then his morale would take over and he'd try and suceed to rescue me. And after that feed me with garlic, whether I'd like it or not.

You’re on holiday with 2 (Adara) and somehow break your leg. What would 2 do?

Swear. Swear a little more, then sigh and take material from the surroundings to splint my leg and perhaps give me something to calm me down.

It’s your birthday. What would 3 (Chester) give you?

A rosary He would probably like to give me the small Catechism, if he could afford it (and could buy it without getting executed..)

You’re stuck inside a burning building. What would 4 (Saurchil) do?

Make sure that I wouldn't be able to get out of there alive, and then find a way out for himself .__. '

You’ve been dared to do something embarrassing. What would 5 (Fingal) do?

Enjoy and play, heavily flirting (lying...)

You’re about to marry 10 (Rowena). What is 6 (Asha)’s reaction?

”Ehm... Well, good for you ”

That marriage didn’t last - you’ve been divorced. What’d 7 (Dora) do to cheer you up?

She'd comfort me, tell me that men (women...) are pigs and give me a box of chocolate and continue with a peptalk and a hug.

8 (Vidar) tries to flirt with you. What do you do?

Blushes a lot and will probably fall like a tree for him.___. '

You compete in some tournament. How does 9 (Iska) support you?

Prays for me -___- '

You can’t stop laughing. What does 10 (Rowena) do?

Giggles and asks me to breathe once in a while.

5 (Fingal) is fatally injured. What does 6 (Asha) do?

Calls for an ambulance and shows a frightingly good knowledge in how to survive something fatal. Especially if there's a lot of blood.

If 2 (Adara) was immortal, would he/she be happy?

She is kinda immortal... And she hates it with a passion x'D <... ]]> ~coachman http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/18360186/ http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/18360186/ Sat, 17 May 2008 00:27:24 PDT Then there's the essay in psychology that's supposed to be handed in monday morning. Tuesday starts with a test in spanish for which I haven't prepared for yet, followed by a oral presentation of my essay in psychology, and after that a written review in english of a book I can't find or afford to buy. To end the great day I'm missing history-class in order to go to the psychologist to be crushed down, and then loooong choir-practise at the end.

I assure you; I'm fully willing to give up any minute at all

So, that was the whining. Feeling much better, yaay I'm soon going to Liseberg, the amusement park here, to photograph. I'd like to go to Wendelsberg to see theatre too (a friend offered to buy teh entrance for me) but I can't afford it O_O Why? Because the public transport is to expensive. I can't pay for 8 tramtickets to get there and back, plus the tickets to get in to town. I hate this with a passion.
Which then makes me wonder how I'll manage all the concerts that are placed in the weekends or evenings the coming weeks. It sucks, oh yeah

]]> ~coachman http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/18288530/ http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/18288530/ Mon, 12 May 2008 12:15:33 PDT

1) What's your character's name?
Fingal Nightmist Mc

2) How old is he/she?
24

3) Is your OC a boy or girl?
Boy, man

4) What's his/her race?
Human

Appearance

1) If this character were to suddenly become part of the real world, and ended up in a heavily-populated area, how many stares would he/she get?
In normal clothes not much other than for his good looks. He has a quite feminime face, his hair is ”legendary”, but otherwise he's rather ”normal”.

2) Is your character considered normal in his/her own world?
By some, by others he's considered being the devil, a magician and so on

3) What would be his/her most recognizable feature(s)?
His hair in combination with his skin (black curls and oddly pale skin)

4) Would you consider your OC as attractive?.
In his own kind of way, maybe. Hard to say since the descriptions of him sometimes sounds like one for a fairytale-creature.


Personality

1) Temper?
Yes, but he keeps it secret if there's is nothing to win by showing it. Usually just throws things around in his room or takes out the anger on the field fighting.

2) Does your character ever get depressed?
Yes, but he manages.

3) Leader or Follower?
Leader, being the emperor of one third of the world. Dreams of not having the responsibility though, and just follow someone else. He wouldn't stand it though.

4) What is the main aspect(s) of his/her personality?
He is manipulative but being the respected and feared emperor that he is, he rarely has to manipulate that much. Most people would consider him blank, and those being really close to him might see a caring side that doesn't reach out very far.

History

1) Did your OC have a family of any sort? If so, are they still alive?
His father was murdered when Fingal was 7, and his mother was also murdered when he was 15. He has family on both sides but didn't take any real contact with them after his parent's deaths.

2) Is your character out on his/her own? If so, why?
Rarely. Last time he fled his own guards he was kidnapped.

3) Has he/she encountered any traumatizing events?
His parents was murdered in front of his eyes, he was badly mistreated by a nanny, war, murder, torture. Will encounter the life in prison, rape and prostitution :/

4) What was probably the best time in his/her life so far?
With his parents or the peaceful times being out with his armies.


Romance

1) Single?
Officially, yes. But he stays faithful to his lover.

2) Has your OC developed any romantic relationships?
Two serious realtionships.

3) Virgin?
Nooo

4) Does your character like flirting?
Yes, always, but rarely has the time or possibility.


Symbolism

1) What animal would you associate your OC with?
A polydactyl cat (skeppskatt) or maybe a fox.

2) Musical Instrument?
Flute or a violin...

3) Element?
Earth, as his father I believe. (His mother being fire, maybe he's a vulcano? X'D No, sorry...)

4) Planet?
Noooo idea


Showing the Love

1) Do you draw your character?
I try sketching, bur I'm rarely satisfied.

2) Do you write about him/her?
Some, yes. When the inspiration is there.

3) Do you use him/her in any rpgs?
Yes, he's an rpg-character.

4) What other ways have you appreciated your OC?
Qué? o_O


RANDOMIZE!

1) Is your character wanted for anything?
He has conquered a third of the world...

2) What are three weaknesses in him/her?
a) Him self (depression, bitterness, etc)
b) His hate for women
c) His weak health

3) Strengths?
a) His intelligence and knowledge
b) His weaponskills
c) His sense for mercy, morale and ethics

4) Does your OC drink or smoke (ect.)?
When needed. Has been taking sedatives (drugs), but prefers not to.

5) What's one quirk about your him/her?
Has good social skills (and needs) but shields him self off, isolates him self.

6) Does your character have any phobias?
Snakes, and he feels really bad while being dirty.

7) What could you do to get him/her into a blind rage?
The murders of his parents,... ]]> ~coachman http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/18062943/ http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/18062943/ Sun, 27 Apr 2008 21:53:45 PDT
So' I'm having the national test in English, course B part C, this very morning. I'm thrilled (not). My "strong" side used to be the essaywriting (which is today) but lately.. We'll have to see. Although, I did notice when logging on dA that I was correcting stuff that I read which was grammatically wrong and stuff. I think I'm kinda nervous x'D

]]> ~coachman http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/17717288/ http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/17717288/ Sun, 06 Apr 2008 14:32:22 PDT



1. Are you ready for 50 questions?
It's my second try -____- '

2. Which state/country do you live in?
Sweden

3. What is your favorite thing you got for Christmas?
I barely remember what I got this christmas. But the fact that people cared meant a lot :3

4. What was the last thing you did in 2007?
Was freezing to death in the company of *Sjazna and her family

5. How tall are you?
175 cm

6. Are you new on dA? How long have you been a member?
My first deviation was submitted June 23d, 2005

7.Are you male or female?
Female

8. Which program do you use to chat?
Msn, Skype

9. What was the first thing you did this morning?
Tried do decide whether to travel to the archipelagos and photograph a service in one of the churches, or stay home and rest.
I stayed home .___. '

10. Do you own a website or forum?
I used to run some sites at Avidgamers, but nothing but that.

11. Is the computer you're using your own computer?
Nope or... I'm not the only one in the fmaily using it. But it's usually here I sit.

12. What is your favorite type of food?
Well, anything but seafood, cheeze in big amounts and cold food. Almost, I'm still kinda picky *blush*

13. How many brothers and sisters do you have?
My younger brother Karl and our cat is sometimes counted as a sister. Alså, Linnéa has adopted me ^^

14. Do you have an account on myspace?
Nope

15. What is your favorite video game or anime character?
Sims, Kingdom hearts? Haven't played so many different unfortunately... And.. Soubi?

16. What is your favorite color?
Black, green...

17. Everyone loves candy, right?
Yes, at least I do. Dearly.

18. Have you ever gotten a gift art from a friend or someone?
I've gotten pretty drawings, but I don't know it they're classified as giftarts o,O

19. Do you have the Wii?
Nope

20. (IF YES TO QUESTION 19.) What Wii games do you have?
...

21. If you could have one wish, what would it be?
Help my family

22. How long do you sleep?
As long as I can

23. What is your favorite part of day?
The nights while I'm asleep. But mornings, sun waking you up and you're alone and everything is silent and calm.

24. What kind of creature/person is your character?
Bwahaha xD Too many

25. What is the first letter of your name?
E. Creative, eh?

26. Do you cuss/swear/curse?
Yes

27. Are you happy, excited, angry, or sad at the moment?
Headache, but kinda satisfied. Wei for me

28. What is your favorite video game?
Haven't I answered this before?

29. Do you think Nintendo is an amazing company?
Noo, but fun ^^

30. What is your favorite video game company?
Sorry, but no

31. Do you like doing quizzes?
Mostly, yes

32. Do you have a lot of good friends?
Not a lot, but the ones I have <3

33. What color eyes do you have?
Darkblue

34. What is your favorite Pokémon?
I hated pokémon when it was new and popular O_O
I did like the Mew and Mewtoo? Some movie my brother made me watch ;__;

35. Have you ever seen a house on fire?
Probably not. Maybe a really tiny one, but if so it's like eleven years ago.

36. What is your favorite book?
There's no singular here. But close to heart for the moment.. "A UFO makes entrance" by Gardell, "Mermaid's singing" by McDermid and the first book by Patrick o'Brian.

37. Have you ever read a 100 paged book?
Long time ago. Standard i 300 pages?

38. Are you a christian?
Yes

39. Who do you like better: Mario or Sonic the hedgehog?
Noo idea

40. Do you like to do smilies?
I missuse them T-T Want to use them in papers for school

41. Do you like to be funny?
Yes, but rarely that I succeed with it x'D

42. What time is it right now in your time zone?
23.24

43. Do you like to draw with a pencil or computer mouse?
Yes, but I prefer pencil.

44. What kind of desktop do you use?
A picture by *testdrive

45. Have you ever beaten a video game? If yes, what game?
Shrek 2? xD

46. Do you have an action replay for some system/game?
Hablas ingles?

47. What is your favorite holiday?
Easter <3

48. What is your favorite... ]]> ~coachman http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/17271017/ http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/17271017/ Mon, 10 Mar 2008 12:55:40 PDT
I think that I'm slowly getting back the will and that's "yay". I still lack ideas for projects and so on, which isn't helped by some people in my near surroundings. But that's a long and boring story

But things are in general looking better. I have a great desire to be playing roleplay and alike, but oh...

And I finished the final HarryPotter book this morning and I feel like not in the mood of not discussing it. Just happy, I've accepted it and I'm not ready to dissect it yet

]]> ~coachman http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/16670151/ http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/16670151/ Fri, 01 Feb 2008 07:09:48 PST Anyways, this morning we watched a canadian movie called "Continental: A film without guns" and it was really good So tragic and sad, about loneliness, but we laughed so many times x'D I'm not sure it was the directors intention to make us laugh, but we did anyway. Though, I've realized that swedes seem to have a kind of twisted humor sometimes. Oh well...
And yesterday we watched "Echo" ("Ekko"), a danish thriller. Simple in the beginning but still scary ;__; And confusing, but still good since it really caught my eye and interest. Tragic too, when I think about it...
And I so should write the reviews before I see an other movie, but I have no energy

And this week has been long. Everyone that I've talked to this week has made me think and that sucks. A lot. Mostly about social issues and friends and so on. And I just get so depressed that I sometimes barely can stand it. Argh...
I have zero motivation. Disappointments around the corner and who am I to blame others? Oh well, what will it matter in a couple of years? -___- '

]]> ~coachman http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/16413318/ http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/16413318/ Tue, 15 Jan 2008 06:15:41 PST

Weather is still bad, but better and that makes me happy. More light during the day resulting in me feeling better (I hope), and more photographing for my part. I was out a couple of days ago and stood as model for a friend who had a phototask for her photoclass and we actually saw some sunshine, omg I tell you I even got to take some pictures of her and it was wonderful to feel all the new possibilities that comes with light. Too shocked though to do some real work, but the portrait of her can be seen at bilddagboken.se : )
Will be working with montage in photo-class which will be interesting. Can't wait to get a camera and time in the lab Not that I have m uch creativity, but still... Fun, fun, fun

(And sometimes I do wonder if I want the time to go faster so that I wont be able to get stuck at bad things and have the chance to move on. Bad me )

One last thing! Visit ~Skuggestalt She's great at drawing and needs love

]]> ~coachman http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/16119857/ http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/16119857/ Thu, 27 Dec 2007 07:20:48 PST
But christmas, it's a happy holiday and I feel that faith might be what I need, I don't know. More and more sounding like a sect-member and that creeps me out.

And I know you shouldn't write being in this kind of mood, but still. Orka.

Photography has been slow due to illness and weather. And I so want to work with my hands, draw and paint and just dirty my hands with those materials. But I'm so bad at actually taking out the things and start. Maybe if I wait just a little while longer it will burst like a big zit? I've begun to doodle in the nights when I can't go to sleep, so soon... maybe...

Anyeays... So Happy B-Day to Jesus, and I wish the rest of you a happy new year and the oppurtunity to look back at the past year with satisfaction

]]> ~coachman http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/15806674/ http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/15806674/ Wed, 05 Dec 2007 12:13:41 PST
So, my psychologist and I seem to have come into an agreement about what type of person I am, and it's because of that type of person that I'm not really my self. So I got some pretty papers with information and tasks for me to do. Yaaay...But it looks good so I should be happy

I'm also trying to plan the project for photoclass, apparently I'm supposed to present like half of the pictures (between 7 and 15 pictures) in two, or three weeks. Ehe, I haven't even begun yet. But I've been looking for models. And I have also failed in finding any x'D
Besides, the weather is making things more difficult since I may need some outdoors scenery. Oh well, small problems...


There will be more in time.

]]> ~coachman http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/15705022/ http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/15705022/ Wed, 28 Nov 2007 09:17:49 PST
Just watched an episode of Heroes, season two and... damn, I cried. A lot. Maybe I'm just being over-sensitive right now, but... gah. It was so sad, all the deaths and... argh. It was wonderful but damn I cried alot.

Other... Well, some things sucks as it usually does and I'm not getting any photographing done, which saddens me. But what to do...
Lucia-concerts coming up soon, lots of practise-hours and I will be so tired at christmas if this will kepp on.

Not much serious to say, no. Just had to... get the crying stuff out x'D

]]> ~coachman http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/15406913/ http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/15406913/ Wed, 07 Nov 2007 13:52:11 PST gilad's journal, because of "Cancer: Light manifestation".

And I just want to thank him and everyone else who have put it in their favourites or/and commented. The past few weeks have been very trying in many ways, and loging in on dA one awful morning and notice all favourites and positive comments... Man, that really turned my day over to something much better.
Thank you! And I'd like to come back to all of you personally and thank you, but looking at my schedule for the next weeks makes me strongly believe that there won't be any time left. So I hope that at least some of you sees this. You've made me so happy.

And now I've ranted about this for ages. Let's just kill cancer, okay?


On to other subjects. I think I'm about to get sick again (due to stress, I believe). Will be going less to the doctor now, got massage today, I will fail the math-test tomorrow and I'm so tired I don't even care anymore (at least not for this week. Next week though >: D ). Studio-photographing for school-assignment tomorrow, skipping lunch for developing maybe, and I'm going to Warscawa this friday morning.

[link] Will be there with the choir I'm in. If you're in Warscawa by that time, please come and listen

]]> ~coachman http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/15333027/ http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/15333027/ Fri, 02 Nov 2007 15:02:13 PDT Sjazna


Three Things You Want To Do Before You Die:
1.)
2.)
3.)

Three Names You Go By:
1.) Elisabeth
2.) Eli/Elis/Eliz/Elsa TwT
3.) Asha

Three Screen Names You Have Had:
1.) kusken
2.) coachman
3.) je_suis

Three Physical Things You Like About Yourself:
1.) My wrists (not in combination with my hands, though T-T )
2.) My hair (when it's less damaged)
3.) My ribs

Three Parts Of Your Heritage:
1.) Swedish
2.) Swedish
3.) Netherlandish, I believe. Loooong ago.

Three Things That Scare You:
1.) Spiders
2.) Darkness
3.) My self

Three Of Your Everyday Essentials:
1.) Tram
2.) Computer/Mp3
3.) Anxiety (I'm a master in worrying)

Three Things You Are Wearing Right Now:
1.) A... cardigan with polo-neck? o_O
2.) Sport-pants
3.) Necklace with pendant

Three Of Your Favorite Bands/Musical Artists: (Argh! Hate this one >< )
1.) LinkinPark
2.) My Chemical Romance (ha! live with it! )
3.) Des'ree

Three Of Your Favorite Songs:
1.) Sia - "Breathe me"
2.) 30 seconds to Mars - "The Kill "
3.) Foo Fighters - "The Best of you"

Three Things You Want In A Relationship:
1.) Safety
2.) Be able to make me laugh, and me being able to make him/her laugh
3.) Respect

Two Truths And A Lie (in no particular order):
1.) I'm 1, 80 cm
2.) I've studied spanish, russian and japanese but ended neither
3.) Went to an audition and performed

Three Physical Things About The Preferred Sex That Appeal To You:
1.) Hands
2.) Hair
3.) Front/Torso (?)

Three Of Your Favorite Hobbies:
1.) Singing
2.) Painting
3.) Playing games (rpg, computer, etc)

Three Things You Want To Do Really Badly Right Now:
1.) Eat a lot of sweet stuff
2.) Get more self-confident
3.) Talk to someone/roleplay

Three Careers You're Considering/You've Considered:
1.) Gardener
2.) Interpreter
3.) Psychologist

Three Places You Want To Go On Vacation:
1.) Russia
2.) Iceland
3.) Rome/Italy

Three Kid's Names You Like:
1.) Raphael
2.) Samuel
3.) Cate

Three Ways That You Are Stereotypically A Girl:
1.) Can rant about braas and menstruation with great interest
2.) Afraid of spiders
3.) Worries about my looks daily

Three Ways That You Are Stereotypically A Boy:
1.) I don't suceed or have the energy to make me look good
2.) Girls seem to like me better than boys
3.) Wearing men's clothes?

Three People That I Would Like To See Take This Quiz Now:

And I'm not sure I'll tag anyone, but... then again... , and are very welcome to do this if the feel like it

]]> ~coachman http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/15202293/ http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/15202293/ Wed, 24 Oct 2007 13:30:05 PDT
But wouldn't that be easier? Just don't care about it and just care about yourself. But then you need something/someone to use, I guess... Damn...

"I bleed it out
digging deeper
just to throw it away"

]]> ~coachman http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/15145090/ http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/15145090/ Sat, 20 Oct 2007 14:32:23 PDT
It's lighter but more plastic. Still bitter as ever, feeling that my rpg-characters are frightening close. The bitter ones at least.
Cognitive behavioral therapy, Heroes and weekend coming up. Just want to go away, far away. Like the U.S again, meeting the OF-hosts again. Feeling culture again.
But Warscava in november. Work, but still... A few days away.

]]> ~coachman http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/14997043/ http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/14997043/ Wed, 10 Oct 2007 08:29:07 PDT
So.. Lots of stress. Test in history at friday and I don't remember anything, then test in natureScience next week, and spanish and geography the week after that. It sucks. And since I once again lost motivation for studying, it sucks even more. And some classes, like photography, is just so damn hard to work out if you can't use the scheduled time. Photography B is the perfect example. Tough assignments about technique and one lesson, 2,5 hour long, per week. If you screw that up, then you're... well, insert appropriate word.

About photography... I'm getting back some will with that, I think. I don't know, but I'm hoping to be able to pull this project off. Soon. Just a small one. but it's like "a small step for me, but a big step for mankind". Only the other way. Small step for the world, big for me. Ehm...

Saw the doctor yesterday. According to the bloodtests I'm well and healthy. Even my iron-levels seemed to be okay. And after, when the test-stuff were over and we were like discussing stuff and talked, I almost started crying. No tears actually fell, but I couldn't keep my voice steady and my eyes flood. After that she was much more careful...
And I know I'm horrible, but I almost wished that I would have some physical defect, 'cause then we would know and it would be easy to pick treatments.

Oh, and I watched LittleMissSunshine before. Bought the dvd yesterday, and damn, I love that movie. It got me tear-eyed twice, and I cried once. And it made me laugh. Real laugh.

]]> ~coachman http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/14956054/ http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/14956054/ Sun, 07 Oct 2007 12:59:49 PDT " Yeah, well, but our relation was already damaged by then, so I thought why not use the moment?"



Anyways... Finished reading "Shutter island" by Dennis Lehane this morning and it was... well. The last half of the book I actually looked forward to reading, taking time to sit down and stuff like that. But the ending... I don't know what to say. Creepy, strange and so damn confusing. I don't really know what to feel. I mean... I want to give in to the doctor's lies and calling Teddy a maniac, but in the same time, no. It can't be that damn wierd. They're just evil. Yes, evil >< '

Started reading "Sabriel" by Garth Nix now, an impulsive buying at the ScienceFiction bookstore.

I think I'm "coming" down to earth, slowly. Not entirely, but a little... Maybe I'm getting better, or maybe I'm just too tired and "accepts" it. Makes it a part of my daily life. But whatever the case is there's a "long way" left, still. Realizing once again how very few friends I have nearby whom I can be with without a lot of anxiousity. And that's a big problem. 'Cause when those friends that you have abandons you, gets a life, goes on a quest, travels or just can't stand you anymore... then you are alone. So very alone.

Now, I'm not that alone here in Gothenburg(or Göteborg, as they now say that we should call it even international, because of N.Y Daily(?)) I guess. Strange perhaps, but telling my parents seem to have made our relation less tense.
But then they can't replace friends, as friends can't replace family. No matter how much you want to.

But I still have problems. I want it just to be me, 'cause then there may be a way to fix it all. Maybe it's just a period. Maybe.

]]> ~coachman http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/14899156/ http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/14899156/ Sat, 06 Oct 2007 00:44:42 PDT Tagged by

And please, strangers, aliens or whatever you are, this tag is open for all!


The first ten people who reply to this journal get put up here, along with three of my favorite deviations by them.
The catch is: You have to put this in your journal as well, and actually have deviations. So, no cheating.

Oh, and if you want motivations, please ask.


1.

[link] "Zayed Obeo" may not be the obvious choice, and I've actually have had a hard time fort his early protrait of him. But when I was searching through your gallery this morning I wartched it again, and it was so...
Okay, he looks insane. Evil and insane, and it looks wonderful. It may not be Zayed, but damn he looks like a psycopath. And the phone-gesture...
[link] Another old picture. But it gives feelings of movement with the... yeah, movement and the background. And that catches my interest.
[link] And well, I just love this. There's nothing more to say x'D No, but I love the pose, the colours and maybe also how anonymous the picture actually is. For me it's Dora and Ayc, but still it doesn't have to be. Even if it really deepens the meaning of picture.
The lights and the colouring are wonderful.
(Also loving "Taking a bath"(the original) and pictures like "Brothers" and "Sketchdump portraits". Waah, I failed)



2.

[link] I guess I'm just fascinated when people manages to freeze things like water and similar. The colours are wonderful and it really does look like a commercial photo.
[link] What first catches my eyes are the grains, but not long after that what's in front of them. The picture is exciting in that way. The coulours are wonderful too <3
[link] The poem... Well, it appeals to me on a personal level and that's a big reason to why I like it. It's short and simple, and with few words it tells you what you want to know

3.

[link] Okay, starting with something "scrapped". I don't know how to explain it in a good way, but you have documented someone... It's... It just feels close in a way. He really looks like a guy on the bus, and.. Well, I just like it. Sorry, can't explain better .___. '
[link] "Archway" is a wonderful example of watercoulours, if you ask me. I love how you have painted the stones and the moss on the stones. It feels real, but in the same time not. And it inspires at least me to work with watercolours (inte för att jag någonsinn får tummen ur, men...). And it feels cozy in a way. Lo... ]]> ~coachman http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/14823581/ http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/14823581/ Fri, 28 Sep 2007 06:52:27 PDT Oh! And i found pics from the trip to U.S in one of girls I travelled with's picturediary! And god, I miss them ;____; They are so damn far away.

Emotional ranting:

I'm just having a hard time feeling happy now adays. Hard time to feel anything at all but tiredness and hopelessness. And when you feel like this you shouldn't listen to carefully to what people say or make it clear for them how you're feeling for the moment.
Well, I haven't. So I've been taking a lot of... I'd like to call it "shit", but that's not right word. Just common things that beats me down. Without people knowing. Ha, the irony.

]]> ~coachman http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/14695235/ http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/14695235/ Tue, 18 Sep 2007 23:47:51 PDT What he did say about my swollen fingers and all that ( [link]
[link] [link]
) is that I from the beginning have sensitive skin (easily gets red and stuff) and probably have "Demografi" (I think it was called...). It means like "Writing-Skin" (SkrivHud), and that's why all the marks came by the easiest touch. And since I, when those symptoms got serious, had been taking medication for different diseases for around five or six weeks it... yeah, got stressed out.
He was a bit confused by the fact that my wrists, ancles and fingers got really swollen during the period, but said that it probably had with demografi to do.

So, looking forward to go to the choir again, which is yay and worrying. But I concentrate on the yay-part. Singing makes me happy. Happy, happy, happy.

And apparently I have a test in english grammar this morning. Which I didn't know. And I haven't studied since the books are in school. And neither did I pay attention to the classes. Damn.

And I've got tons of homework that should have been done last week. I'm such a failure. Greh.


And yeah, it doesn't hurt as much anymore. Or more.. I don't feel it. I don't feel very much actually. Fan-tastic. Emo, emo .____. '

]]> ~coachman http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/14673432/ http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/14673432/ Mon, 17 Sep 2007 12:55:11 PDT
Also trying to not eat so much sugar anymore so that I wont have it as substitute so that I can be happy. It doesn't last so long.

Ah... Anyway...

___________



Jag tror inte att smärta har en gräns. Jag tror däremot att våra kroppar har flera gränser, och i slutändan är det vi som förlorar. På något sätt trodde jag att det inte kunde bli värre. Att de inte kunde nå mig längre. När vi bröt upp, när jag bad dem att inte kontakta mig mer mindes jag inte att det finns ett skede då vi genom att slitas itu förs samman.
När vi dör.

~

- Mischa, jag måste resa till Frankrike ikväll.
Han lät sin blick vandra för en sekund bort mot Mischa som stod där med en vagt förvånad blick.
- Mamma har dött och pappa och mina syskon har bett mig komma och hjälpa till med begravningen.
Han svalde tyst, tyckte att det var svårare än vad han lät visa. Han och hans mor hade skilts åt innan han hunnit... ja, hunnit vadå?
- Herregud...
Han nickade, stuvade ner underkläder i väskan.
- Är det okej? Jag blir inte borta längre.
Han höll blicken fäst vid sitt packande, orkade inte röntgas av Mischas ögon.
- Ja, självklart. Ska jag följa med?
Han såg mot Mischa och försökte le lugnande, men det blev bara trött och sorgset.
- Det är lugnt, du har ju arbete. Jag blir borta högst en vecka...

___________

Mischa tillhör Sjazna, Tolou till mig, etc..

]]> ~coachman http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/14555147/ http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/14555147/ Sun, 09 Sep 2007 03:44:20 PDT
Went to the theatre with Liv yesterday, and it was really nice. We saw "Romeo and Juliet", as heartbreaking as always. And afterwards she also bought me dinner at Sunwall. I was a wreck, but she was nice and understanding and.. yeah, so thankful for what she did.

I haven't gotten out of this... "art-slump". Partly because of the loss of camera, but also when it comes to drawing. I used to be able to sketch pictures and paint with aqaurells, halfassly of course but still.. It seemed as if my skill had rose, but then it just fell. Geh. I should probably just let it go for now and hope that it will loosen up someday.
Especially since my hand hurts >< '

I'm hoping that I overall will get bettert before the year ends. Otherwise I'm not sure I can keep this up. Shool's already tiring...



And you know when you've reached out to people and they don't respond? Sigh

]]> ~coachman http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/14487710/ http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/14487710/ Tue, 04 Sep 2007 13:25:18 PDT __________________________________


Got tagged by

RULES:
Go to your music player of choice and put it on shuffle.
Using the following questions, press play.
Use the song titles that come up to answer them.
Don't cheat or your appendages will be cut off. :B

1. How does the world see me?
Ignition - Brian Setzer
... ¬¬ '


2. Will I have a happy life?
Peter Gabriel - Signal To Noise


3. What do people really think of me?
Grace Jones - Pull up the Bumper
That I have space? x''D

4. Do people secretly lust after me?
Phil Hart u.a - Amazing Grace
.. Wut?

5. How can I make myself happy?
Hooters - Twenty-Five Hours a day
Love someone obsessively? x'D

6. What should I do with my life?
(Star Trek - The Eugenics Wars - Soundbook x'D)
Nazareth - Love hurts
I knew it! >< '

7. Will I ever have children?
R.E.M - Around the Sun
We'll be stubborn about it?

8. What is some good advice for me?
Mariah Carey - My saving Grace
.. uh.. what? Keep on?


9. What do I think my current theme song is?
No Doubht - Bathwater
Well, all sweaty x'D

10. What does everyone else think my current theme song is?
Chicago - Wishing You were here
Yeah, I'm kinda pathetic that way...

11. What song will play at my funeral?
Enya - Christmas Secrets
I know what you did last christmas O_O

12. What is my day going to be like?
Michael Jackson - The way you make me feel
Like shit? Horrible headaches..

13. Why am I here?
Beatniks - I'm just a memory
Yup, agree I'm afraid .___. '

14. What will people remember me for?
Nightwish - Know Why the Nightingale Sings
I've been called psychiatrist and mother several times so..

15. What song will I get stuck in my head tomorrow?
Flash & the Pan - Don't vote
If it can reach me, moahaha! Damn, it's stuck already >< '

16. Are there people waiting outside waiting to take me away?
Metallica - Bleeding Me
For saving me from myself maybe?

17. What will this year be all about?
Kraftwerk - Autobahn
Driving up for a car-license?

18. If you reached the top of Mount Everest, you would scream:
Mike Oldfield - Moonshine
That's just a long instrumental piece that scares me x'D


19. The next time you stand up in front of a group of people, you'll say:
Nina Simone - Wild is the Wind
Sounds deep enough

20. Your message to the world:
Lisa Stansfield - People hold on
Oh yeah

21. Your deepest secret.
Nazareth - Love Now You're Gone
Well, yes, maybe...

22. Your innermost desire.
Bullet for My Valentine - Room 409
It's an art-classroom at my school

23. Your oldest memory makes you think...
Lordi - Would You Love a Monsterman
Well, I saw me as ugly quite early, and dramativ, romantic stories... I loved them.

24. Somewhere in your wedding vows you'll include:
Jennifer Lopez - Si Ya Acabo
Qué? Spanish guy/girl? x'D

25. When you wake up in the morning you mutter?
Rihanna - A millin Miles Away
.. would I like to be in that moment x'D

26. Right now, your feelings are:
Meat Loaf - Everything louder than Everything Else
God, yes..!

27. The day you fall in love will be the day that:
Talking Heads - Don't Worry about the Government
On a political meeting? x'D

28. You scream during sex:
Madonna - Oh Father
Ehm... No. No comments .___. ' ~coachman http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/14424573/ http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/14424573/ Fri, 31 Aug 2007 12:16:04 PDT
Survived a whole week in school, been to all my lessons and I'm happy. I didn't think I'd make it, but I did anyway ^^ And I only almost slept att the History of Culture-class. To my defence the room was dark except for a big screen in the front of the classroom, and my teacher's voice is... calm xD
I survived lunch and history-class too, even though history was really slow. Got my camera, met Linnéa and went home. And I survived the schoolweek! Now it's only the weekend left ;____;

I'm so extremely tired these days. It's... extreem. But mum called the doctors a few days ago so they'll call us sometime within three weeks to give us an appointment. Geh.
And the allergy-expert somewhere here in september... And dentist... Gah...

On the positive side... ehm, getting appointments with doctors? x'D Going to Warzawa in november for a choir-competition, Mum's home..
On the negative side... I felt like my drawing skills were rising, but now they're... non exististing. Which deppresses me even more (everything's deprresing .___. ). No camera to work with and everything I write or draw comes out very bad. Geh. (not that I felt that I was good at drawing from the beginning, but now... extreem >< )

Do you feel the optimism? x'D (also trying to not get so hydrated all the time. I drink to little water .__. ' )

]]> ~coachman http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/14298054/ http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/14298054/ Thu, 23 Aug 2007 03:48:09 PDT
I'm feeling... lighter today. Maybe 'cause I yesterday told my parents that I feel like crap and have been feeling like crap the last months. Probably... Or maybe 'cause I haven't been up long enough to get depressed for the day. Haha...

Anyway... so no pictures/work since no camera.

]]> ~coachman http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/14005307/ http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/14005307/ Fri, 03 Aug 2007 17:59:02 PDT " - I'd sacrifice everything for Mischa. I don't know if he'd do the same for me, but I love him and trust him that much that he wouldn't let my sacrifice be to waste. That he'd take it and and keep on, knowing that that would be my wish. And I trust him this much, I trust him my life.
If he'd do the same to me I would grief of course, maybe curse him, but I would fight to take care of what he gave me, knowing what he gave up for me."

Tolouse

]]> ~coachman http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/13943038/ http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/13943038/ Mon, 30 Jul 2007 14:46:40 PDT Poor her being sick and poor me being stuck in someone else's house without much to do.

But it's been a nice time here this far. Lot of differences and stuff, but interesting. I'm actually feeling sad that we're going to leave and go back to sweden on sunday Don't want to leave all this wonderful people and the warmth and stuff. But I want to go home to the people there, even though I don't think that my abscence is so painful for them x'D Oh well...

Been tormenting Adara, Chester and Fingal in my head a little. I guess it's a product of not discussing them with anybody. It did show though that There's at least two people in the group who plays D&D, and that another one's boyfriend is interested in LARPing. Ana dragged me to him while waiting for the Potter-book to be released and so I tried, tired as hell in a fastfood-restaurant, explain, describe and advice how to arrange a serious LARP (this while Ana ate up all of his onion-rings. According to her that's a proof that he was interested and listened to what I said xD)

Oh, and I read "Stardust" by Neil Gaiman. Cute <3 Want to see the movie to now <3
And I've read Boyprincess, volume 2 till 6. Haha. I'm pathetic. And I've also started reading "The Virgins Lover" by Philippa Gregory. Whoch don't impress Megan, but what the heck... I like it. It's easy, cute and heartbreaking. And it makes me think of the Courtlife-rpg. I miss it ;____;


I'm also hoping that Sajzna has a wonderful time with Lienwyn at the world's end (sorry...), but not too well though. I still want her back even though I'm small and whiny. Sa det sa ( I can't write in swedish >< they don't have all the letters...).
I miss Liv to. Mjaou.


Photographing with film too. Greh. But scrapbooking Yay D

]]> ~coachman http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/13705487/ http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/13705487/ Thu, 12 Jul 2007 08:18:16 PDT
The Ranting:


And i just have to... rant. About Felo and Saurchil. Omg. Originally they belong to the Eurasin-roleplay ( avidgamers.com/theelfwood ) where they are two of the first elfs in history. But we put them in another spinoff, more fantasy and tolkien like, where they are princes. Felo's the crown-prince of the highelfs and Saurchil the crown-prince of darkelfs, and the two different kinds of eves doesn't.. like each other.

Saurchil gets kidnapped by the highelf king, aka Felo's father, which Felo don't know anything of. He finds Saurchil chained in the dungeons by accident, when running from his fiancée, Cela.

To make a long story a little bit shorter, when Saurchil's been recaptured by his people and brought back to his country, he and Felo starts to meet secretly in the nights. Felo's father finds out and through a trap he captures Saurchil in the woods where he thought he'd meet Felo. The king and his men almost beats Saurchil to death and before he can loose his conscious they cut of the tops of his ears. And it's so sad since the pointy ears are a big pride for the elfs, it's the number one visible thing that shows that they aren't humans. And they are also very sensitive. Especially Saurchil's, who's been charmed and seduced by Felo's touch with them.
And they leave him there to die.

A couple of months later Felo travels to participate in the "GreatCounsil", similar to United Nations, with his father. Felo, who's as convinced as his father of that Saurchil is dead, has stopped fighting back and just accepts his father order.
But at the big meeting the darkelf-king's son stands up and talks. Alive. Saurchil. Yes.

And it's so horrible when Felo sees Saurchil's ears. They meet, by accident, in the corridor where Saurchil has ordered his lover to go away and just leave him alone. Felo, then alone with Saurchil, goes to him it's just so very painful, all the words sad. And then Felo puts back the hood that Saurchil's been wearing all the time so that he can see him better and then sees Saurchil's ears. He don't need many words to guess who'd done it, and Saurchil abruptly leaves him in shame. This even though it's not his fault or anything...


Sorry for the rant, and it's much more nice and beautiful than I've described it here.

]]> ~coachman http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/13636655/ http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/13636655/ Fri, 06 Jul 2007 16:22:13 PDT
Heh, and I find myself really pathetic these days. First I'm depressed, and after that I'm depressed about me being silly and depressed. And so on >____< '
What'shurting most, though, is the fact that I'm hurting and annoys people I love. By the low selfconfidence I make really bad and halfassed jokes where I say, or approve to, negative things about me. If anyone's feeling bad I'm blaming my self for it and so on. And well... that's a horrible way to be against your friends. So I'm trying to stop. Really.

Oh, and confusion. Don't forget the confusion. And tiredness. And rain. Lots of rain ;___;

]]> ~coachman http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/13513267/ http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/13513267/ Wed, 27 Jun 2007 14:23:43 PDT
Been in some depression-like-thing and been starting to really look at my work and wondered how the heck I could though nice of it. Blah.

But let's not feel sad, and rejoice instead. Got some of my photos from school scanned yesterday, so I'm putting them up now and then. Like my project-assignment. Pity the scanner killed some details and a lot of colour (greyness, heh..).

And soon it's weekend and a lot of sleep! Yay

And a big thank you to you who favourited Symbols - Fish. You made my day

]]> ~coachman http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/13405664/ http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/13405664/ Tue, 19 Jun 2007 10:40:27 PDT
]]> ~coachman http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/13364083/ http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/13364083/ Sat, 16 Jun 2007 02:53:51 PDT

And this damn headache.

]]> ~coachman http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/13304506/ http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/13304506/ Mon, 11 Jun 2007 14:33:43 PDT
Still tired of everything and without school there's "nowhere to run". Strange, I know, but even though school tired me out so much, it always gave a reason to be gone for a couple of hours. Oh well...

I wont write much more since the risk will increase that it'll be a 100% emo-post so.. yee...

Oh, two more things.. Considering to post a "Diary", written from a rpg-character's point of view. Don't know yet, and I would need an "okay" from those who's characters are mentioned. Like.. one. But still.
And I really want my own camera, preferable digital. It's not as expensive as with a non-digital (which I've used for quite some time now .____. )

Ego, ego *humming*

]]> ~coachman http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/13101595/ http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/13101595/ Sat, 26 May 2007 13:42:25 PDT
Talked with my P.E-teacher this thursday. Finally collected some kind of bad courage and tried to talk about me being sick all the time. I really do believe I was heading down into a deppression not long ago, probably still in the riskzone, and my body's getting sick a bit to often. There's always a cold och something. Sigh. Where the first ends, the next starts.
I was about to go with "Oh, don't mind, I forgot what it was I wanted to talk about" since I feel so stupid. Why should I be depressed? Maybe I'm just moving to little (which I know that I do. Haven't done some good physical exercise in ages) or maybe, probably, I'm just "emo".
But I talked to him, since P.E has suffered a lot from sicknesses, I told him barely about deppression and stuff and made clear I didn't want a psychiatrist or something. Just wondering if he had any advice on what I should do to... get better (slap my self in the face and see how pathetic I am?).

Anyway, he told me about this disease, illness, that his youngest son has. The imune-system doesn't work as it should, is not as strong as it should and stuff like that and it's adjusted with some injections per year(?).
But I don't know, his son got really serious sick and I... No, no serious sickness. Just cold and stuff. And bronkit(similar to flue). And anyway, I don't have the courage to take it up with anyone since how pathetic I may consider my self I'm not sure I can take a "You're just silly and wants attention" thrown in my face. Even if that's the case. And that's probably the case.

I love my family, I love my friends, but still I can't manage to talk with them. In the same time I'm trying to not throw too much of this on them. I don't want to. Gah. Blargh. I'll regret this post, sorry. Just needs to express my self. Probably not sick anymore now *sigh*

]]> ~coachman http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/13083270/ http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/13083270/ Fri, 25 May 2007 00:49:02 PDT


Rules
1. Choose a few of your own characters. Five at the most.
2. Make them answer the following questions
3. Then tag three people.

Characters Chosen:
Nuramiel, demon who plays at people's sexuality, always there when the world will end
Elsie Winston, grandma of the "chosen" (who is to save the world, duh)
Tolouse Corday, french vampire-hunter related to Charlotte Corday (and Angelique D'Yvriell, ask Sjazna 'bout her)
Fingal Rivers, the biggest liar ever and later on known as executed for his homosexuality


_____

How old are you?
Nuramiel: Oh, something like a 1900 years. Young and fresh, don't you think?
Elsie: Is that a thing to ask a lady? Pff.. *sigh, smile* Oh well, 65 actually.
Tolouse: *shrugs lightly* Younger than Mischa... 23, for the moment
Fingal: *glares at the interviewer, sighs* 25. Anything else you want to bother me with?


Height?
Nuramiel: I'm splendid 174,5 cm tall. You want me taller? Shorter? If you're a good boy... girl..
Elsie: 1,64 m.
Tolouse: Am I supposed to know that? It isn't a vital part in killing vampires as far as I know o_O'
Fingal: About half a decimeter shorter than Edward... So I'd say.. *looks at the others* .. 178? 180? Who cares? Women loves me anyway *devious and a bit triumph smile*


You got any bad habits?
Nuramiel: Getting involved with all the rulers of the world? But I'd say that their bad habit are far worse: Marrying me. Bad mistake.. for them...
Elsie: Short temper, needs to make buns or a cake or similar at least once a week. And I've heard that my urge to protect my family is bad in some moments... Poor Ayc..
Tolouse: Me? Bad habits? You're kidding xD *..silence..* .. okay, I may drink a itty-tweeny little too much and I don't hesitate to tell people I love what I think. And no, I don't love Mischa *blush* he's... he just needs to hear. And would I be a good collegue to not tell him when he's a stupid moron?
Fingal: You mean except screwing people's women, being homosexual and killing people who finds out about me and Edward? You didn't hear that, did you? I thought so. Oh, come here to the window...


You a virgin?
Nuramiel: ... ... bwahahaha! X'D But, you wouldn't feel it, belive me. I can be a virgin if that's what you want *inviting smile*
Elsie: No, I have three children who's got a bunch of wonderful children themselves. I love them all.
Tolouse: *raises eyebrow* Do you think this body of an angel could have passed by all this time untouched?
Fingal: No, not in a single way.


Who's your Mate?
Nuramiel: Since... what's his name? Dhanya! What's the last idiots name?.. No. I'm not in to relations. Boring. Although... Dhanya is the closest one the past 300 years but she's more like my assistant, hehe.. Oh, she'll kill me when she hears that >:3
Elsie: No one, since Jacob died.
Tolouse: Single and free. The closest one I got is Mischa though. You understand my pain?
Fingal: .. . Please, tell me, why am I doing this?


Have any kids?
Nuramiel: Nah, don't want the world to end yet, y'know. I like this century.
Elsie: Yes, three; Samuel, Daniel and Anne.
Tolouse: .. ... Ey, Fingal! Where are you going?
Fingal: *growling*

Favourite food?
Nuramiel: I like the stomach and brain. And a young mans strong heart, ohh, that's real tasty. Melts in your mouth... Oh, oh, and I like blueberries.
Elsie: A wellmade lamb-dish and one of Dora's vegetarian-recipies.
Tolouse: Don't really have any...
Fingal: I don't enjoy food, unfortuanately.

Favourite Ice Cream flavour?
Nuramiel: Blueberrie and polkadots
Elsie: Pear and vanilla
Tolouse: Ice-cream?
Fingal: I've got no idea what you're talking about but I like strawberries.

In love?
Nuramiel: Haha, you're so funny. Sleep with me?
Elsie: I guess. Or more like old love. I still love Jacob, of course, and Elian... maybe it's turned to friendship? Anyhow, I'm too old for being in love.
Tolouse: Ehm... Well.. No, i guess not.... ]]> ~coachman http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/12801138/ http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/12801138/ Tue, 01 May 2007 09:23:55 PDT
Absolutely not interesting, but whatever.


.... and yes, I'm sooo happy today. But I got answer from Megan so... Okay, a little honest happiness then. Damn.

]]> ~coachman http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/12499271/ http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/12499271/ Sat, 07 Apr 2007 16:38:00 PDT Easter eve. Isn't that supposed to be a "red day"? A sunday? When you do nothing but spending time with family or friends, or rest? Okay that very few are christians now aday, but still... Very few of those who we spent good friday ( long friday? Långfredag..) are even a member of the swedish church. The only two who actually went to church was my mom and her sister.. And still we had this biiig dinner with a lot of friends to the family..

Anyway.. watched a brittish documentary on tv about "The gospel of Judas". Judas evangelie. And I'm not really sure what to think. Okay that it may be fake, okay that the whole bible may be fake, but the bible tells us important things (and I sound really scary, don't I?). You know... simple stuff that people should know.. Like don't kill, don't steal, don't rape (not women, nor men), don't start war and just love each other. Does this sound like awful things that are meant to strangle us and take away our freedom?
Then again.. I've been a christian for a "long time". There was some years when I couldn't call my self a christian, I couldn't "believe" and stuff. I didn't understand, but that's over. Or something.. But still, a christian, and when I "discovered" Judas as a person and not just a name of someone who kissed Jesus, I got big questions on my shoulders. Questions like do we have a choice? Did Judas have a choice? Could he have chosen not to betray Jesus? And was he ever forgiven?
He's been painted as the traitor, but what guys like Andrew Lloyd Webber has brought up was his feelings afterwards. He committed suicide. He hanged him self. He was so sad of what he'd done and what consequenses it got that he committed suicide.
For me it's big questions and there is no answers. Not in the bible, and not in the newly found "Gospel of Judas". It just gives another version of the story, but it does not answer any questions..

Sorry for this, I'm probably just rambling on. It's late, I've eaten to much food and candy and stuff I and I feel like throwing up. But the documentary and watching JesusChrist Superstar brought up this thoughts and questions. Again. (which reminds me of.. Jerome Predon's voice... Omg >3 And Fred Johansen (who's swedish, according to mom's sister. She saw him at the opera here in Gothenburg..) as Pilates, so good and that voice... and Rick Mayall as Herod... Gah, so amusing xD)

Happy Easter, people! Beware of the candy!
(oh, and btw... the allergy-tests I took two weeks ago... The didn't show anything. So I'm not allergic to whether penicillin, nuts or trees.. So they've sent a not to admission to an expert in allergies. 'Cause I'm allergic to something, we just don't know what yet >_< '
[link] [link] )

]]> ~coachman http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/12373804/ http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/12373804/ Sun, 08 Apr 2007 08:09:59 PDT thank you, I love your reactions, whether they're good, bad or criticizing.

And now over to something else..:

For the first ten people who reply to this journal, I shall go through their galleries and pick their three best deviations in my opinion. Then, in return, the person must post this in his/her journal.

Don't be afraid, it's good for the ego

Oooh, and I tagged myself thru [link] Visit her, her art's real nice


1. ArtTrade Shikouy (For its small differences from her other work which shows that she can make small variations big), Father, forgive me (For it's wonderful shading and colouring) and Never let you go (For the wonderful feeling that's just painted all over the drawing )
(Two other favourites worth checking out if you ask me is Joseph Summerfault for the expression in his face and Kiss and then Goodnight? for its cuteness <3 )


2. A Brother's love, The King, Nernethai - Garden
(and gah, check out her gallery, dammit >,<' )

3.

4.

5.

6.

7.

8.

9.

10.

]]> ~coachman http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/12229481/ http://coachman.deviantart.com/journal/12229481/ Sun, 18 Mar 2007 08:12:57 PDT
Every day when I've had acess to a good camera the weather has gone bad. And whenever I'm without camera the weather's been wonderful. Gah. Annoying.

My mom's been looking at a camera for us, but we'll have to se. So expensive

]]> ~coachman