http://search.deviantart.com/?q=by:equinnoxx&section=today deviantART RSS for by:equinnoxx en-us Copyright 2009, deviantART.com Sun, 06 Dec 2009 03:19:33 PST deviantART.com http://blogs.law.harvard.edu/tech/rss http://s.deviantart.com/minish/widgets/apple-touch-icon-precomposed.png http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/16483094/ http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/16483094/ Sun, 20 Jan 2008 00:16:48 PST Enjoy your journey.
Goodbye and good luck.

]]> ~equinnoxx http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/16308448/ http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/16308448/ Mon, 07 Jan 2008 21:32:52 PST a keen sense of what is appropriate, tasteful, or aesthetically pleasing; taste; discrimination. As in you have no ...

class - [klas]
Informal. Relating to things of high quality, integrity, status, or style. As in you have no ...

But at least have some decency. And to talk to me weeks before and say your uncomfortable when you're around me and someone else because we maybe flirt a bit?

Riiight ... fucking hypocrite.

I knew what i saw that night in the hotel when i came in and maybe i just didn't want to believe it. But whatever. That's fine, you can make your own decisions, you're a big girl now. But far be it from me to tell you that you keep making the wrong ones. I really don't know what happened to you. I understand people change but most of the time it is usually for the better. Most of the time they hit the bottom and bounce back ... not fall deeper.

Maybe its pointless to post this here. You obviously don't care even an ounce anymore about me and granted we're not on the best of terms but to do that right in front of me?

It's a shame. You used to be so pure, intelligent and self driven. Now its dirty, dumb and stubborn.

I hope you enjoy life and the bed you made for yourself because it was all your choice.

Fuck you and goodbye.

]]> ~equinnoxx http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/15279259/ http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/15279259/ Mon, 29 Oct 2007 20:25:37 PDT
They will do whatever they want to do.
Even if they realize it or not.
Actions speak louder than words and I'm sure mine speak volumes.

...Although some have an addendum that I'd love to elaborate on sometime.

But alas it is what it is, and nothing more.
Separate paths lie ahead and only fate knows if they join or not.
Regardless of the outcome, I've got scars and stories to share with the travelers traversing the trail with me.

]]> ~equinnoxx http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/14678398/ http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/14678398/ Mon, 17 Sep 2007 18:39:34 PDT
Sad outlook i know, but one that is true nonetheless. I think I've just become too rooted and jaded being here for this long. Life is stale, no doubt about that. But in the interim I've learned a great deal -- so much so that I frequently impress myself with the conclusions i reach and the problems i solve. That is a pretty big glimmer of hope that is all me...no one else.

Confidence comes with that and it's something I've never really had an abundance of. Almost like knowledge is power, confidence is king. It's the ability to take a stand and get something done or sort out and deal with the problems encountered. I kinda like it.

So coming back full circle means that this star is rising. Took me long enuf but ehh whatevz. I took the long road, so sue me. I'll tell you what tho, the people and places I've met along that way have helped me more than anything else. And I'm eternally great full for that. I regret nothing, for i could have not done it without them.

]]> ~equinnoxx http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/13307220/ http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/13307220/ Mon, 11 Jun 2007 18:24:15 PDT
But if I'm keeping tabs, then we're at 33%. The new car has brought a much needed breath of fresh air to the otherwise stale life i live currently. Work has taken over. So much so that i cant even keep dates because i end up having to cancel because i get called in. I'm sick of being the goto guy, sick of the responsibility, sick of fixing everyone else's problems. If maybe i had some compensation, it might be worth it. Even a 'thank you' might break up the monotonies of having to be tied to a laptop 24/7/365.

So I'm pretty much done with it. I worked my ass off for my car and that was well worth it 10 times over. Every walk back through a desolate parking lot is accompanied by an ear to ear smile. Its all mine and i fucking love it.

Capitalizing on that previous entry, it looks like there is some love back in my life; as sick as I'm sure it is to love an automobile. But for me, its a start and I'll take it. It's the groundwork for securing the other two necessities and I'm looking froward to those adventures more than you could ever know.

]]> ~equinnoxx http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/12188658/ http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/12188658/ Thu, 15 Mar 2007 01:00:58 PDT
Seeing 300 tonight made me miss love. I usually base my well being on the three main things in my life -- Car, Job and Woman. As cliche as it sounds, i kinda see these as the three main elements that make up my life.

The Car represents earth -- if its there, it keeps me grounded. It may not be flashy or 'in your face' but it enables me to get from point A to B and keeps me grounded knowing that i will always have my freedom on tap should i ever really need it. Without it, i feel stranded and stuck, unable to be myself and accelerate my life ahead.

The Job represents water. It's there as an essential to keep the cash flowing to promote and allow me to live the life i live. Sometimes it becomes more than i can take and in that instance i must tread to stay alive. But it is, nonetheless, the background underlying force that keeps life going. Without it, i live frugally and offer myself no insight or preparation into my future.

The Woman. So many ways to go with this one but i truly see it as representing fire. It fuels my desire, my reason for being and can also burn me if I'm not careful. When the fire is present in my life, i am more alive than i have ever been. Without it, i strum along with no direction, no ambition no reason for being.

So its with those that i base the realm of my happiness. Simple and sad yes i know but its true. Its an even 33% split; with the 1% split being me. i make the final decision after all has been weighed. I am my own person and can veto my feelings at any time -- however, sometimes the odds are just straight up against me.

The movie tonight reminded me of what i'm missing. Right now out of the 3 elements, i have none. My car is falling apart, i hate my job and i have no love. The warriors in the movie felt love, dedicated themselves to a cause they loved and died for it. I miss that feeling of having purpose. I used to wake up in the morning with an objective, even if it was a chore. Now i have to pry myself from the covers and remind myself that its only for another few hours. Sure, there are slight glimmers of hope in each day but even those are fading now. Its all becoming automatic. Its all becoming a blur. Its all becoming life on autopilot and i fucking hate it.

So essentially I'm back at square one. Once i had it all; but recently i was holding on to what shreds of the crumbling empire i had left. So i let go - no sense in playing a losing hand. And now the everything is no more. Its all a clean slate. Nothing left to really do but update the history books and move on learning from the mistakes as i always do. And consequently every time i do, the empire i build gets bigger and better. So one can only expect this one to be a civilization that will conquer all.

Lets hope this army stands up to the greatest foe of all ... time.

]]> ~equinnoxx http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/11844094/ http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/11844094/ Fri, 16 Feb 2007 15:22:47 PST
Nothing like sitting in an airport for 11 hours to enlighten yourself. Good way to make some new friends too. Funny how sometimes a person's outlook can be so grim, so dismal so hopeless -- yet all they need is a complete stranger to put things into perfect perspective.

Stuck in JFK waiting out an ice storm that never finished, I had the most fun I’ve had in awhile with her. I was prepared to zone out with the ipod, laptop and phone. I didn’t touch any of it. Its been awhile since I’ve seen a fresh friendly face. The dialogue didn’t manage to fall flat once. all subjects, all ranges, all the while passing the time and making fun of the irate people who weren’t prepared for this at all.

It's nice to know there’s still people in the world who aren’t obsessed with the future, jobs, or status or anything at all. They're just there because they are; and at that moment can offer all they can to anyone around them. One could almost call it the new chivalry. But this one isn’t gender specific, its human race specific.

So maybe after all this time it turned out to be ok. Maybe I’m just missing the idea of having an equal. Maybe there aren’t any real answers right now. But as the equation grows & gets more difficult, the answer will be that much more rewarding when you find it.

And then the journey will have been worth it ...every step of the way.

]]> ~equinnoxx http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/11726596/ http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/11726596/ Wed, 07 Feb 2007 18:29:25 PST I was next in line which meant I was invisible
From where I stood I could see that the till was full
He didn't look the type to play superhero
So I stepped forth and paid for my cigarettes
Crept out the stores front door to chase a little breath
Bangles in my head, shake the song off
Another manic Monday night, its gonna be a long walk

A car pulled up, a fixed up cutlass
A woman and a child climbed out and left it running
They went inside of the deli, placed an order
With the extra dollar fifty bottled water cuz the daughters picky
When they came out mommy gave me a glance
That said "man can love an angel but he's got to take the chance"
Already knew the deal, I lit one up and walk
So they got back in the oldsmobile, belted up, and took off

Thug love on the corner by the Walgreens
Lookin at me like I'm just another square saltine
As I get closer I notice that they showin each other sketches
Out of their notebooks, reminded me of my old roots
I walk pass with a nod and a reminisce
Swear to god hip hop and comic books was my genesis
Respect the life and the fashions of the children
It's the only culture I've got, exactly what we've been buildin

All of a sudden I'm in front of some man
No he's a youngin, but he's got a gun in his hand
He looks fifteen, he looks frantic, no he looks afraid
Immediately apprehensive til I heard him say
"Do you want this? It's not mine I promise.
I found it on my block in between a couple garages.
Didn't wanna leave it for a child to stumble over,
I don't even know how to hold it."

It was a .38, the poor mans machete
Held it in my hand, thinking damn man it's heavier then expected,
Wedged it behind my belt buckle
Knowin that its evil, even thought that I could smell trouble
The extra strength felt weak,
But over there on the corner saw what I needed and proceeded to cross the Street
Put the heat in the mailbox to loose it
Figured that the post office knows whats best to do with it

Mosey down the road thinkin' bout the old
I use to roam this zone thru two feet of snow
Right here, this use to be a record shop
I've gotten love, I've gotten drunk, I've gotten beat up in that parking lot
I've had my lake street pride for three decades
These alleyways, and these streetlights have seen my best days
Before I was a germ learnin how to misbehave,
All the way to the grave, south side is my resting place

Took a right on Lyndale I'm getting near
But then the road became empty and the people disappeared
The clouds ran away, opened up the sky
And one by one I watched every constellation die
And there I was frozen, standin in my backyard
Face to face, eye to eye, starin at the last star
I should've known, walked all the way home
To find that she wasn't here, I was still all alone.

No matter where I am, no matter what I do
I'm always coming back home to you
They can leave me for dead they can take away my true
I'm always coming back home to you

Through the lies and the sins that ride the wind that blew
I'm always coming back home to you
As sure as the life in the garden that you grew
I'm always coming back home to you
No matter where I am, no matter what I do
I'm always coming back home to you
If only I had known what you already knew
I'm always coming back home to you

From the heaven I've had to the hell I been through
I'm always coming back home to you

...I'm always coming back home to you.

]]> ~equinnoxx http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/11582323/ http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/11582323/ Fri, 26 Jan 2007 23:30:26 PST
just even talking to you now puts me in an odd state of mind. you said it best. we never had a friendship before the relationship. so maybe pursuing this is just a lost cause. i feel like im just torturing myself with this. In fact most everyone agrees. funny how they all seem to know exactly how i feel even tho i hardly say much. even the shared friends kno. im sure all you would have to do is ask and they'd tell you how i feel. hopefully its something you already knew.

all it takes is one glance at these entries and its easy to see my thought/reasoning pattern. it flies from one extreme to the next, slowly eliminating irrational thoughts & feelings until i can finally untangle everything and find out what is really there. So maybe i'm wrong about all this. it could very well be. but these entries always help me whether you really read them or not.

but still there’s so many questions. and so few fulfilling answers. why now? why out of all this time apart you randomly decide to pick up the phone again. is it all because of her? are you jealous? no way. how could that even be possible after all this time. what does it even matter? so much time has elapsed, we hardly know each other anymore. but the biggest one of all is, if that never happened that night, would you have still broken the silence?

]]> ~equinnoxx http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/10116528/ http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/10116528/ Mon, 18 Sep 2006 20:55:07 PDT placed in neat little rows
becoming a piece
of everything that grows
some numbers, a name, to indicate you played the game
came empty handed and left the same

a soul is a soul
and a shell is a shell
the border in between is full of everything you felt
some cling to a cross because they're tired and lost
they leave it up to the weather to measure the cost

and everytime I look within I recognize the darkness
familiar to the image of the artist
staring at the bathroom mirror in a strangers apartment
can't remember her name, don't remember how I got here

but here I am, thinking about death again
humbles out the stress, helps the breath get in
i need to check my friends as well as my next of kin
to let them all know
i love them all to the end

and when the soul begins to reap, I think she'll know me from
the sleep
i keep caught in the corner of my bloodshot eyes
and if she has the nerve, to let me dump a couple last words
i'm gonna turn to the earth and scream "Love your life!"

Love your life, quite cliche but I guess thats me
a ball of pop culture with some arms and feet
as discrete as I've tried to keep the drama and cancer
it's no secret that I hunger for someone to feed the answers

i never expected a bowl of cherries
i'm just a virgo trying to find my own version of the virgin
mary
and when I let them carry me to a cemetary
i wanna be buried with a pocket full of clarity ]]> ~equinnoxx http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/9961597/ http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/9961597/ Mon, 04 Sep 2006 08:42:13 PDT
whatever. im over it all. just faded memories now, which is what i vowed would never happen. but sadly thats the only way to progress. i knew it wouldnt of worked, we're just too damn different. but i do miss the nights talking, sleeping, drinking, eating, buffying, driving and then trying to piece it all back together the next day. when all is said and done, i miss the friendship the most. i lost my best friend and thats prolly what hurts the most.

its doubtful you even read this anymore but just kno i'll always be here for you. if you ever need anything or just wanna chill. as cheezy as it sounds, its true. you'll always have a place in my heart

... and your glasses will always have a place on top of my fridge.

--=Q=--

]]> ~equinnoxx http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/8355582/ http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/8355582/ Mon, 03 Apr 2006 16:22:01 PDT ...and yesterday was like today.

Woke up, got up, near eleven o'clock
butt naked except I was wearing my socks
and that's cool, 'cuz most the time this floor is cold
stand up and stretch look around this mess

my place has been a cave since she left me
make my way to the kitchen, start the coffee
then dip to the bathroom, begin the triple-s
and wash the previous evening off me now

out the shower, get dry, shove a q-tip in my ear
well, what do we have here?
it appears as if a piece of me has got motivation
...ain't nothin' wrong with a little morning masturbation!

fresh, dressed like fifty cents
clean and awake now I'm ready to commence
spark up the caffeine and nicotine binge
and that's pretty much the pattern of how the day begins

and I write for an hour, maybe half hour more
then put on my shoes and grab my key for the door
put my headphones on for this world I ignore
trek down the street towards the record store

'hey, bro - how you do, anything new today?'
'nah man, how you been? it's the same old same again'
well then, I'll be gone friend, I'll see you around
and I'm out, destination ...uptown

in the summertime the women wear a lot of skin
and if I sit in one spot I can take 'em all in
sometimes I even talk, to see if I can make one grin
if not, yo, it's cool I ain't gonna take it personally

from Anne Landers, to Ani DiFranco to Orphan Annie
I love all women, but most of them just can't stand me
I don't know, maybe it's my hair or my clothes
'...or maybe she noticed that you was diggin in you're nose...'

either way it's okay, I wasn't tryin' to get laid
I just wanted to say 'I hope you have a great day'
and then she stopped with a smile that began to blush
'here, take my number, call me up, I'll come over and make you lunch'

I got up and headed down towards the book store
to check for titles, that my man Michael's got me lookin' for
my visit was short, 'cuz I just couldn't feel
that cat behind the counter actin' like I'm here to steal

so I dipped back out into a cloud of tattoos
pierced body parts and colorful hairdos
and I questioned, did Babylon resemble this?
are we getting any closer to the end of the list?
a sensuous kiss,
placed on apoco-lips
we teach them how to make a fist, but not to resist
and I'm wondering how'd we find this position
but people are people and I still love 'em ...especially the women

onwards to the coffee shop
maybe Muddies for a refill and some sociological studies
see the junkies, while they co-exist with the sobers
all the bugging of eyeballs, the shrugging of shoulders

and that's when I saw her, sippin' her water
I wanna kiss her mom just for having this daughter
'excuse me miss, I don't mean to come across strong,
but I've been waitin' a while and you've been taking too long!'

and she smiled and I began to blush
she asked if I'd like to go to the bathroom and make some love
and I got visions of us, and the mirror getting steamed
...and that's the very moment I woke up from the dream!

Woke up, got up, near eleven o'clock
butt naked except I was wearing my socks
and that's cool, 'cuz most the time this floor is cold
stand up and stretch and look for my soul

In tomorrow I see no promise...
...and yesterday was like today.



--Atmosphere
--Like Today-- ]]> ~equinnoxx http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/8270725/ http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/8270725/ Sun, 26 Mar 2006 02:27:13 PST
I would love just one more drunk night with you so i could tell you how i feel. I'm sorry but i just cant do it sober. Theres so much anger/love/hate/devotion that i need to get out and i figured it would fade after all this time but guess what ... it hasnt. I still miss you and i still think about you everyday.

I don't know if you've ever noticed but its clear as day. Ask your family, friends or even the tarot kards... i miss you everyday. Thats not even an exaderation. if you asked anyone who still hangs out with me that would tell you without a second thought that naggingly clear that i miss you.

i know i throw some stuff out there that might seem spiteful or hateful but honestly it makes it easier to get over you. I feel like you left me and i dont know if your ever coming back. i need to at least prepare myself for the deathblow if you never do. it's true i am enjoying the single life right now but it's so empty - so meaningless - so neutral. i miss the long conversations on world issues, i miss the physical alterations, i miss the way you shift into third, i miss the pull up bar, i miss the rediculous hot house, i miss the cuddling - i just plain miss you.

since i sent you that txt that you werent supposed to get i guess i'll post the other one i have. you can hate me if you want, but honestly the only thing that matters to me right now is that you know how i feel and god do i miss you ... always. it was saved as a darft like the letters i never sent but if you got that one i sent then this one shouldnt be any worse. so here it is.

Don't you ever wonder if the spark is still there?
Or had it already disappeared on your side?
Dont you ever long for that passion that passed thru our lips?
Or was it never there to begin with?
Dont you ever miss the comfort and saftey of our piece of mind?
Or did it exist only in my mind?

if there was a concrete answer to all of this maybe my mind wouldnt wander so much. I mean just give me something to go on.
Tell me you got bored.
Tell me you found someone else.
Tell me the sex was bad.
Tell me anything to justify this.
Just give me something solid to go on ... so i can go on. I'm emotionally exhausted and void of any feelings of joy and happiness i once felt. I do fear that i'll never be that happy again only because i fear i'll never let myself go like that again.

But as much as it still stings now ... at the time ... it was totally fucking worth it.

Memories are all i have now - and while you may have forgotten yours, mine will never fade.

Always and forever, i miss you T.

--=Quinn=-- ]]> ~equinnoxx http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/7732805/ http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/7732805/ Sun, 29 Jan 2006 19:42:09 PST
On the other side its too much love. It’s unconditional. No matter what. You could probably key my car, stab my cat and trash my computer and i still don’t think i could ever hate you. That’s what i came out of this with, a spiritual bond stronger than anything I’ve ever known. But like everything else that’s left alone it eventually fades with time. I don't ever want it to fade. ever. But I can only do so much to keep from losing it without being overbearing. The rest is up to you. I don’t want to push you away but it seems like that’s what’s happening. If that’s what you want, then fine. I can't change how you feel, but just know that’s not what i want at all. In fact, its probably the furthest thing from it.


missing you...




--=Q=--
]]> ~equinnoxx http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/7643093/ http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/7643093/ Wed, 18 Jan 2006 19:53:48 PST She cant live her life without me as a friend
I cant figure out why I'd give a damn to what she wants
I dont understand the now before the then

Most of this garbage I write
That these people seem to like
Is about you
And how I let you infect my life
And if they got to know you
I doubt that they would see it
They'd wonder what i showed you
How you could leave it
A friend in Chicago said that I should stay persistent
If I stay around, im bound to break resistance
Fuck you Lucy for defining my existence
Fuck you and your differences

Ever since I was a young lad
With a part time dad
It was hard to find happiness inside of what I had
I studied my mother
I digested her pain
And vowed no woman on my path would have to walk the same
Travel like sound across the fate ladder
I travel with spoon to mix this cake batter
And i travel with feel so i can deal with touch
Its like that?
Thank you very much...
Fuck you very much!

And everyone in his life would mistake it as love
Everyone in his life would mistake it as love
Everyone in his life would mistake it as love

Yes
Yes it is

Fuck the what happened
I got stuck
They can peel pieces of me off the grill of her truck
Used to walk with luck
Used to hold her hand
Fell behind and played the role of a slower man
I wanna stand on top of this mountain and yell
I wanna wake up and break up this lake of hell
I feel like a bitch for letting the she twist me up
The last star fighter is wounded time to give it up
On a pick it up mission
Kept it bitter
Getting in a million memories just to forget her
The difficulty in keeping emotions controlled
Cookies for the road
Took me by the soul
Hunger for the drama
Hunger for the nurture
Gonna take it further
The hurt feels like murder
Interpret
The eyes
Read the lines on her face
The sunshine is fake
How much time did i waste?

Fuck you Lucy for leaving me
Fuck you Lucy for not needin me
I wanna say fuck you
Because i still love you
No, I'm not ok,
And I dont know what to do.


And everyone in his life would mistake it as love
Everyone in his life would mistake it as love
Everyone in his life would mistake it as love

Yes
Yes it is

Do I sound mad?
Well I guess im a little pissed
Every action has a point
Five points make a fist
You close em
You swing em
It hurst when it hits
And the truth can be a bitch
But if the boot fits
I got an idea
You should get a tattoo that says 'warning'
Thats all, just a warning
So the potential victim
Can take a left and safe breath
And avoid you
Sober and upset in the morning

I wanna scream FUCK you Lucy
But the problem is I LOVE you Lucy
So instead
Im'a finish my drink,and have another
While you think about how you used to be my lover
Fuck you.

Yes
Yes it is

And everyone in his life would mistake it as love
Everyone in his life would mistake it as love
Everyone in his life would mistake it as love



Leave me never would you... if you should, could I live?


--Atmosphere--
"Fuck You Lucy" ]]> ~equinnoxx http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/7502732/ http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/7502732/ Tue, 03 Jan 2006 20:03:42 PST thanks.

parts of me was stuck on things i wish i wasnt and for the most part tonight got them unstuck. some questions still remain but i'll never ask. idk maybe im too afraid of the answers -- and maybe compared to everything else, its just not that important.

the spectrum of emotions is still wide open, which is better than closed shut. its still too early to tell heads from tails and i agree that all i really know is that i dont know. i do know that if i did have a last wish it would be to know. i also know that theres really only one way to find out for myself.

but its still not all roses, theres always stuff i hold back. mainly because i have to. my initial thoughts are always outlandish, aggressive, illogical and harsh. its the way i've always been. im sure you've seen it at least once or twice. its kinda like i have to find the extremes before i can find a middle ground -- before i find myself. but in this instance ive been to both extremes and now im slowly returning to that middle ground. like a bad cut that stings and bleeds like fuck for a day or two but eventually heals into a scar. always there to remind you if you look at it, but not prevalent enough to stop you from living.

feelings aside, its good to have you back. i missed you, i missed your energy but most of all...
... i missed my best friend.

this last shot of soco is for you.
--=Q=-- ]]> ~equinnoxx http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/7322237/ http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/7322237/ Thu, 15 Dec 2005 19:33:47 PST How many more demons do you have to strangle?
How much longer must you remain in this dream,
Before I finally figure out if you're insane or a genius? ]]> ~equinnoxx http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/7057222/ http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/7057222/ Wed, 16 Nov 2005 16:44:38 PST
so its been a few months, even tho it seems like an eternity. i still think about her from time to time. i doubt she even thinks of me anymore. truth is, she broke up with me. she dropped me like a bad habit. she was over it before she even mentioned it to me -- before i even realized it. i hate her for that. only because she never really gave me a second chance. you figure youre with someone for that long, the least you could do is give them the benefit of the doubt and try to give it another shot. i kno i got lazy toward the end. but what can i say? I had it all.

I had solid roof over my head. I had a good car. I had a great job. and i had an amazing girl - no - the best girl. The internet even agreed with me there
Seriously, what more could i ask for? I had it all. You'd be lying if you said you wouldnt get lazy either.

I guess i lost my drive. I kinda just figured things would fall into place. No desire to accomplish new things. No will to create. No reason to change. For that, i blame no one but myself.

they say hindsight is always 20-20. i can vouch for that. but things are usually clearer when you have time to analyze them and i have nothing but time now. i just wish i would have realized it a little sooner. i wish i would have realized i did what i said i would NEVER do ... grow up. I grew up. I guess it really was inevitable. I'm easing into my 25th year on this planet and most people by that time know what they want and are already solidified in their lifestyle. I never wanted that. I always wanted some sense of uncertainty, some mystique in life... i never wanted to grow up. But fight it as i would, it crept up on me. I became static in my lifestyle. I went corporate, i got a job. I have bills, obligations, business trips & meetings and responsibilities.

I guess she wanted none of that. I grew up and got more mature, she didnt. Hows that for a complete role reversal? She traded her maturity in for a vacation from responsibilities. So thats how we grew apart. What she probably doesnt know, is i always liked her lifestyle better. I would have traded mine in, to join hers in a second. She would fire back and say I never went out with her or her and her friends. Well I always balked at hanging out with her and her friends because i was selfish. I wanted her all to myself. I got jealous when she was with anyone else. i never told her that, but i guess we never really did anything outside together was because I was afraid i'd lose her. I lost others that way and i guess i just got overprotective and jealous.

now i've NEVER been a jealous person. EVER. if you know me, you definitely know that about me. i don't even believe that its a real emotion. I really think its just made up. but shit, i finally know what it feels like. i actually congratulated her on being the first person ever to make me jealous. that was probably one of the last things i said to her. what a way to go out. quinn your a schmuck.

I had a dream awhile ago. Its actually one of the few remember, as i hardly ever remember them. But in it, i came to a realization. I told myself, "Self... she makes you live your life"
I didnt really believe it til i started to think about it. She really does. I dont have a whole lot of motovation but i do have ideas. She was always there to help me make that leap from idea to action. And in doing what she did, she is making me live my life. And i love it.

I guess in the back of my mind i always knew we'd never be together. We were always too different. She was philosophical, i was technicial. She was goal oriented, i wasnt. She was black, i was white(both figuratively and literally).

i do miss her tho. but i guess its getting easier. friends help. girls help. but they're all not her. they could never be -- and i dont want them to.

I got a fortune cookie the other day and it read:

"Live life out of your imagination -- Not out of your memory"

Thanks Po-Sing Kitchen ... I think I will.
--=Q=-- ]]> ~equinnoxx http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/6301068/ http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/6301068/ Mon, 22 Aug 2005 20:18:09 PDT
I figure ok, we've been together for about 3 years or so and I’m pretty sure this is the most serious relationship she's ever been in(as well as myself). And granted shes a fun girl to party with so i'm sure some part of her misses that carefree party life she once had. She has had more responsibilities thrown at her than you and i could ever dream of and shes handled them all extremely well. it was a juggling act for awhile but shes knocked off a big one -- school.

My thinking is: ok, I’m done with school with no real job prospects lined up, I’ve been in school while working full time and taking care of family for most of my life. What the hell else would you do if you didn’t have school anymore?? PARTAYYYY!!!!! Fuck yea!!

Sure i miss her. but i know if anyone needs to party without any strings attached or worries about consequences (-ahem- to an extent...) it's her. She deserves it – No, she more than fucking deserves it.

I however, growing more attached to her by the minute for these last 3 years has been in the worst depression since i left home to live with the other half of my parental units (whom i've never really known) in a land far away from here. Old songs resurfaced, old feelings came back to haunt and i'd be lying if i told you i didn't cry.

It's hard but its for the greater good ... her. She is by far the most single unique person i know -- and i know a lot of people. They all kinda blur the edge somewhere and melt in with a certain crowd or style but not her. Her style is her own. I've never known such individuality before and to be honest, i'd probably go so far as to say i'd never really known love before.

This brings me back to my depressed state. For most of my growing up days i had a pretty poor outlook on life in general. My musical tastes represented that. It got to such a point where i succumbed to darkness and couldn’t even find happiness in the things i cherished most. Maybe it was luck or the drugs, but I realized this couldn’t really be a good thing. So i changed. I became numb to everything. Nothing mattered and ignorance was bliss. Surprisingly this was an improvement for my state of mind. Think of it as going from rock bottom to the algae on top of the rocks. A small step, but at least it was up.

Fast forward a few years to my current frame of mind and you'll find i'm still numb to a few things, but i've embraced many others and i feel its made me a better person. but love was one thing i swore i would always be numb to as i'd been viciously hurry far too many times in the past. i gave up that vow when that aforementioned unique person came into my life. i started to feel again and it was great. it was more than great, it was totally fucking amazing.

But now i remember why i took that vow. as amazing as it is, it is equally as painful too. things change, feelings change and most importantly people change. in this universe everything is dynamic -- things that remain static don't survive. if this was a few years ago i could have probably let this all slide off my back after a week and jump back on the bandwagon. well shit, this time i fell off, got knocked unconscious and now the bandwagon has a few years head start on me. as i look around after the dust settles i can see i've got an uphill journey ahead of me. slowly i start to forge ahead remembering some advice i told myself about 4 sentences back, things that remain static don't survive.


So maybe it ends and maybe it doesn’t. Hell i know it hasn’t ended for her, its just starting. Which is why i can't blame her for the stuff she did -- i can almost empathize with it. But i guess this is her real self after all and i fell in love with it 3 years ago. She may think otherwise but I know different. I think together we just became lazy and static. We had found each other and we didn’t really need much else. I think she believes that static things are entirely bad. Which differs from my viewpoint because sometimes i feel its necessary to be static and watch everything else evolve for a little bit. Let them go first, learn from their mistakes, watch them take their path and then make your own.


Maybe someday our paths will meet again. Maybe we will realize those other paths didn’t really go anywhere at all. Maybe someday... Maybe in Montauk.

I hope I'm wrong but this may be it.
Either way, I’ll miss you and everything we had T -- more than you could ever fathom.
--=Q=-- ]]> ~equinnoxx http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/5224867/ http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/5224867/ Fri, 29 Apr 2005 20:26:28 PDT As I open this new door in my life, I think to myself, "Am I really ready for this?"


You fucking bet I am.

Finally no more bullshit.
No more learning stuff that isn’t relevant to anything in my life.
No more limitations because of age of lack of knowledge.
No more 'Not enuf experience' deterrents.
No more bullshit.

This is it -- Life. Stuff matters now - not that it didn’t matter before, but it was almost like I was in training for 20 years. Most of my training was completely irrelevant to my future, some of it not so irrelevant. Regardless tho, I take it all with me through this door. It has made me who I am. It has made me want to open this door.

Standing on the other side of this doorway are a variety of people. Closely observing them, I notice features spanning all ranges of ages, races and faces...

...but all have one thing in common...

"Come join us.", they say.

Stepping through, I look back one last time. My memories remind me of that little punk ass sk8r kidd who wanted to be anything but corporate. He wanted to be anywhere but where I am today.
So stubborn, so young, so innocent.

Guess he grew up.

If his friends & peers from back then could see him now, they'd probably dismiss him and label him as a traitor.

Some would call it, 'Selling Out.'

Yeah, I sold out ...... to knowledge.

I'm not in this for YOUR currency -- Money.
I'm in this for MINE -- Information.

Wish me luck.
--=Q=--
4.29.05 ]]> ~equinnoxx http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/3582992/ http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/3582992/ Wed, 13 Oct 2004 17:09:58 PDT
« sigh » i really need a job. one that will stress my physical & mental well being. sometimes i wonder how much more productive i would have been if i actually had people around me who cared and took an active intrest into what i am into. not that i regret anything or any situation im in now, but idk, i just wish i had someone to talk to that has a vast vault of knowledge. someone to bounce ideas and schematix off of. someone who would help me in my projects and further my intrest in my intrests.

but i guess thats what the internet is for.
being the only one in the physical world sucks tho.
constantly thirsting for more
and never getting it.

you'd really be suprised how many people claim to be in the know and get thrown by words like 'overclock' or even 'volt mod'. i just feel like my potential is being wasted. « bigger sigh » at least i have atlantic city to look foward to... ]]> ~equinnoxx http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/1870925/ http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/1870925/ Thu, 19 Feb 2004 08:06:08 PST

boom and im back. had a lil computer crash

but nothing that couldnt be fixed with a better, faster and even more baddass newer computer. hand built by yours truly of course.

but thats old hat. im still in school but im out finally in may. now all i need to do is find a job and then maybe come to grips with the fact that i'll be joining the ranks of the world as a person. im scared - only because im not entirely sure i want to go down this path. it seems like its the right thing to do, but only by default. what i feel is my true calling or what i would love to do (rather than like to do) i've been told is not lucrative, obtainable or socially acceptable enough for me. or maybe i just havent devoted enuf time to it.

anyhow im back on this site with maybe even a few updates, pics and other cool stuff coming your way (whoever you are that actually reads this). so sit back, relax and enjoy. this is going to be one hell of a ride.


--=Q=-- ]]> ~equinnoxx http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/968080/ http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/968080/ Sun, 20 Jul 2003 20:42:25 PDT ~equinnoxx http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/649863/ http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/649863/ Tue, 22 Apr 2003 21:44:13 PDT

but im tired and i sure as hell cant miss this 9:30am klass n e more. so peace out to all those who still read this.

E.Q.X ]]> ~equinnoxx http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/649862/ http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/649862/ Tue, 22 Apr 2003 21:44:05 PDT

but im tired and i sure as hell cant miss this 9:30am klass n e more. so peace out to all those who still read this.

E.Q.X ]]> ~equinnoxx http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/635992/ http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/635992/ Fri, 18 Apr 2003 21:03:25 PDT




E.Q.X ]]> ~equinnoxx http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/623423/ http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/623423/ Mon, 14 Apr 2003 22:50:58 PDT

E.Q.X ]]> ~equinnoxx http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/620337/ http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/620337/ Mon, 14 Apr 2003 00:00:16 PDT
things were well. tonight things started well but ended oddly. hope whatever my actions were, they didnt skrew me up completly :-\

god, i love my girlfriend


E.Q.X ]]> ~equinnoxx http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/396957/ http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/396957/ Tue, 17 Dec 2002 22:29:47 PST


.... well i kno at least one person does. hmph

until then rock out.

E.Q.X ]]> ~equinnoxx http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/258195/ http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/258195/ Tue, 03 Sep 2002 19:02:39 PDT ]]> ~equinnoxx http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/256132/ http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/256132/ Mon, 02 Sep 2002 07:44:03 PDT

skhedule looks like this:

Skhool Mon & Wed: 12:30pm - 9pm.
Work Tues, Thurs, Friday: 9am 6pm.

hopefully my work skhedule will work out like that. i still havent made it up but ill kno prob by 2morro 4 sure. they'll prob make me work a weekend day 2. those bastids, i hope they eat shit but whateva. i need the money. my kar is going soon - planning to sell it for something that kan make it to vermont every weekend.

...and thus ends a summer of happiness, sadness, fun & boredem. many feelings and emotions this summer has thrust upon thee and our lord has made thy choices. through many a quibble he has found solice in his decisions and actions. the road there was a long, hard, dark and difficult path - which he navigated on his own. fighting demons off, resting when he was weary and continuing to his destination at a grueling pace. along the way he met many creatures, persons and walks of life. some good, some bad but all aiding him in knowledge of himself, his life and most of all his heart. he thanks them eternally, for without them he would not be who he is today.

Our lord has conquered his crossroads only to arrive at an entire new chapter. The book still has many pages to be filled and the inkwell is not nearly depleated. Let's look on omnisciently as our hero begins a new quest with the experience and knowledge he has gained from his previous one. One can only hope this one yields prosperity, happiness and change.



E.Q.X. ]]> ~equinnoxx http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/252278/ http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/252278/ Thu, 29 Aug 2002 23:44:37 PDT




....ok well maybe not that just yet, but eventually. i still enjoy talking to some ppl online. ya i like talking and petting and stuff.

but this has definatley been a good summer. started off kinda bad, got worse, then a bit better, then everything went to shit and now i think its starting to level out again.

but enuf of me repeating myself, i think all my next journal entries will be stories. for some reason i kan write a story that relates to how i feel about sertain things, but if i try and put it into like regular words, it neva komes out the way i want it to. but we'll see, its late and i have to drive my mom to the airport 2morro or something kause shes going to niagra falls for the weekend (no, no huge party at my house, my grandma is still home) but maybe a farewell party for me. kause im pretty sure, my appearences will be few and far b/w from sept til dec. but im out, sleep kalls.

E.Q.X. ]]> ~equinnoxx http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/248703/ http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/248703/ Tue, 27 Aug 2002 05:02:42 PDT ) so im gonna kikk every 1's asses in races.

but i think im gonna get going, gotta pikk ppl up and hunt ppl down. to whoever is sitting here reading this rite now, have a fun non-water-park-filled-day


E.Q.X.


mmmm, batman? ]]> ~equinnoxx http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/247580/ http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/247580/ Mon, 26 Aug 2002 11:11:59 PDT
so alot has happened sinse the last entry, and life for me seems to be getting much better.

was lost for a bit and wasnt even sure if i was going bakk to skhool, had no job and kar was dead. now i am going bakk to skhool [ a better one, farmingdale ], i got my old job @ the shop bakk and kar is running good for now. i even get to hang out with kool girls

all these warm and fuzzy feelings inside and i didnt have to take any pills to get them. kick ass.

only problem remains is that i hate my komputer. old bitch ass technology doesnt like new things so it tends to thro a hissy fit and not work. so to all you loyal users and viewers out there my FTP will be down for awhile.



and in staying true to what my calender says, august has officially been re-named to Wasted. Jan, feb, march, april, may, june, july, wasted ... yep.
sux that its almost over. odd series of ups and downs have made it an ......... intresting and odd summer to say the least.

random - my impression of tony fuster on the way to the bathroom @ silva's...



heh heh. word to the wise kids, unless your brady -- DONT EVER FUNNEL A GUINESS EXTRA STOUT!!!

more updates to kome as i have nothing to do this entire week b4 skhool starts. free time is good



E.Q.X. ]]> ~equinnoxx http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/228806/ http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/228806/ Mon, 12 Aug 2002 14:01:56 PDT




E.Q.X. ]]> ~equinnoxx http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/225107/ http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/225107/ Fri, 09 Aug 2002 15:32:49 PDT

wow, havent updated this in awhile... well to kontinue from last episode i got really bad sunburn and had leperacy for a week. then with that leperacy i ended up going to great adventure on like the hottest day of the year - no joke it was like 100+ degrees out with like no klouds. but i took a bath in 50 spf sunblokk and it was all good.


im betta now. but things around me arent. everyone hates everyone else for some bullshit reason or another, misunderstandings turn into life-long feuds, drunken aktions yield memorable (and un-memorable) results and life around the dungeon seems hostile. for such a lethargik and laid bakk person like myself its almost hard not to get kaught up in the drama. i used to be all in it and at times even liked it but now its too petty and worthless for me to waste my time even thinking about. i hate her, she hates him, he fukked her, she sukked off him, they used to talk, now they dont, this band rokked, now they suck -- whateva. so goes life. people kome, some stay and some leave. some move for in for awhile then move out. some play you, you play some. for whateva the reason it doesnt matter .... to me n e ways, i have better things to do with my time.

i will tell u one thing tho, i am loyal to the ones who are loyal to me. especially the ones when shit hits the fan...

...they're there. and even when shit hits them in the face kause u thru it, they still love ya. thats loyalty. my boys kno who they are and we're tight. thats all there is to it. peace.


E.Q.X.

]]> ~equinnoxx http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/201755/ http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/201755/ Sun, 21 Jul 2002 22:01:10 PDT odd day.

woke up around 9am this morning after another nite of drinking and smoking myself retarted. somehow i always wake up early the day after i drink. idk y, its odd -- and usually i kan even function. but ok n e way slade krashed my place kause he was outta his mind again. so he slept on the the leather kouch with no a/c which has to sukk kause ive done it and its not pleasant. but n e way my mom komez downstairs and it goes a little like this:

Mom: "Hey Q, do you have any rum down here?"
Me: "umm, your asking me for rum at 9 in the morning?"
Mom: "Yea, i need it to make a kake"
Me: "yeaa, surre u do. I think i have some Barcardi in the fridge"
Quinn sleeply stumbles over to the small white fridge sitting atop his counter and carefully removes a half empty bottle of Barcardi rum.
Mom: "Oh wow, thats perfect!" -- she says as she snatches the bottle from my hand and starts to walk away.
Me: "Wtf?! thats my bottle! u dont need all that for a kake, that stuff's expensive!"
Too tired from sleep deprivation and too exausted from the night before, i let her go. I feel back asleep only hearing her echoing footsteps up the aging stairs and the thunderous footsteps marching above my head.

10:30am
(Cell phone plays contra level 2 music)
Me: "hullo?"
Unidentified person on the other end of the phone: "Hey Q, its keri"
Me: "o, whats up."
Keri: "Are we still on for the beach today?"
Me: "Yea, definatly"

fast foward to slade stumbling outta my house, fumbling with his keys and attempting to drive bakk home -- and me with my already sunburned body at the beach

was chillin at the beach with keri for awhile and kame bakk only to find out that my kar got broken into and muthafukka's stole my radio / cdplayer dekk (it was an ok one, not really that great) and my goddamn sell fone. so whateva im pretty pist kause my shit is gone but then i realize that they left my radar detektor there. its a $150 radar detektor ... the radio was only worth like $50 -- and they leave my radar detektor. dumb fukkin ppl -- but i thank them for leaving that and my cd book. i woulda kried if they took that. so n e way im out a radio and a fone. shit happens rite? not much i kan do, they broke in thru the passenger side window and i have an alarm so bah.

so keri sez she has the same fone as mine that she doesnt use kause she got a new one. she said she'd give it 2 me. skore. got my fone bakk and bonus -- its the exakt same model as my old one (nokia 5165) but without all the kool shit i did to it. whateva i kan get it all bakk. kinda sux kause the fone that got stolen was given to me by janet, she'll prob b pist about it when she reads this -- hi janet, i'm sorry -- so i get my fone bakk. we go 2 the at'n't place to tell them. they kill my old fone and switch my same # to the new fone. sweet. got my fone bakk, same numba and hopefully they didnt have time to kall like zim-bob-way or some shit. but whateva, i got free long distance on my plan

so that solves stolen problem #1. stolen problem #2 is the radio. just so happens that i have an awia cdplayer face sittin in my room kause i neva installed it when i bought it about 2 years ago. so turns out prokrastination pays off. brady komez ova and we install the bastid. sounds betta than eva and now i kan play mp3 cd's !!! whoo hoo!!! 12 hours of muzak on 1 cd! up 2 512 traxx!

so all in all shit worked out in the end. only thing that sux is i lost all my fone #'s in my fone -- so everyone who reads this kall me so i kan get ure # again. think im gonna go shopping for some red lights this time around. heh heh.

so until next time .....


.E.Q.X.


PS going to the beach with an already 3rd degree sunburn is not a good idea. ]]> ~equinnoxx http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/197501/ http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/197501/ Wed, 17 Jul 2002 23:02:27 PDT
ok im sitting here and its like 2am and im not tired as usual but idk what to do. silva, slade and i had this idea one nite to start like a nite klub kinda thing. kause we realized that so many ppl like ourselves sit home or drive around at like 2am with nothing to do. so we figured we'd make something to do. there would be sooo much money in that.

well we took it pretty far -- i even kalled the real estate place that owned the plot of land and asked them about it and they gave us a few lokations. but apparently u kant have a pool hall / klub in a residental area. what the shit is that?

well whateva, i chilled with tiff and amy 2nite which is always fun, they're awesome! and i kno tiff reads this so:

HI TIFFANY!!!

but ok i think im gonna go now kause my head is spinning. (its not really but if i did this rite there should be a head spinning here --> )

well rokk on kids, i wont be around today as im going upstate but should be bakk like mid day fri. talk 2 ya all then. and now i kno its ruff -- but try and manage without me ok kids?

rock on!

.E.Q.X. ]]> ~equinnoxx http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/139272/ http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/139272/ Tue, 21 May 2002 10:03:26 PDT

.E.Q.X. ]]> ~equinnoxx http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/135909/ http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/135909/ Fri, 17 May 2002 09:17:31 PDT
me: "y'ello?"
other person: "Hey, what up"
me: "nothing."
other person: "O... So, ya whats up?"
me: "..."
other person: "This is the part where you say something"
me: "You called me"

-- at this point i find something else to amuse myself with --

other person: "so, ya, what is that, are you playing a game?"
me: ""

at this point theres more minutes wasted on me trying to tell these ppl i dont want to talk to them if they have nothing to say!!
!@*^%$#^%@!(* !!!

um ya #3 too many ppl have my damn #. i mean somedays i really have stuff to do other than go hang out with my friends and get something to eat / do nothing. so i turn the phone off. forget it, everyones world kollapses. by the time i turn it bakk on at the end of the day its like "You Have 65 New Voice Messages". Thanx guys. you kno what would be really funny, if i changed the number. hmm...

i hate cursive and i hate all of you. (well not all... deviant ppl are mad chill )





.E.Q.X. ]]> ~equinnoxx http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/135908/ http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/135908/ Fri, 17 May 2002 09:17:23 PDT ppl annoy the shit outta me. i think im going to start a 'one kall, per person, per day' limit on my phone. kause #1 - i have no minutes left this month. #2 ppl kall me up and this is the konvo ...

me: "y'ello?"
other person: "Hey, what up"
me: "nothing."
other person: "O... So, ya whats up?"
me: "..."
other person: "This is the part where you say something"
me: "You called me"

-- at this point i find something else to amuse myself with --

other person: "so, ya, what is that, are you playing a game?"
me: ""

at this point theres more minutes wasted on me trying to tell these ppl i dont want to talk to them if they have nothing to say!!
!@*^%$#^%@!(* !!!

um ya #3 too many ppl have my damn #. i mean somedays i really have stuff to do other than go hang out with my friends and get something to eat / do nothing. so i turn the phone off. forget it, everyones world kollapses. by the time i turn it bakk on at the end of the day its like "You Have 65 New Voice Messages". Thanx guys. you kno what would be really funny, if i changed the number. hmm...

i hate cursive and i hate all of you. (well not all... deviant ppl are mad chill )



.E.Q.X. ]]> ~equinnoxx http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/134279/ http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/134279/ Wed, 15 May 2002 11:37:26 PDT
peazowt




.E.Q.X. ]]> ~equinnoxx http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/134277/ http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/134277/ Wed, 15 May 2002 11:36:45 PDT
peazowt


.E.Q.X. ]]> ~equinnoxx http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/132083/ http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/132083/ Mon, 13 May 2002 01:18:10 PDT


... yea me either. :-\
but im sure as hell gonna get some red bull and try :-\


.E.Q.X. ]]> ~equinnoxx http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/132016/ http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/132016/ Sun, 12 May 2002 22:55:05 PDT
don't know y my damn cam pikk isnt working, but ill work on finding a stable host for it as soon as i kan. until then deal



.E.Q.X. ]]> ~equinnoxx http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/131910/ http://equinnoxx.deviantart.com/journal/131910/ Sun, 12 May 2002 20:30:07 PDT
--=Q=-- ]]> ~equinnoxx