http://search.deviantart.com/?q=by:iamsketch&section=today deviantART RSS for by:iamsketch en-us Copyright 2009, deviantART.com Tue, 22 Dec 2009 09:33:38 PST deviantART.com http://blogs.law.harvard.edu/tech/rss http://s.deviantart.com/minish/widgets/apple-touch-icon-precomposed.png http://iamsketch.deviantart.com/journal/28954317/ http://iamsketch.deviantart.com/journal/28954317/ Tue, 15 Dec 2009 01:57:05 PST
So why is it that I'm burned the fork out?

I'm heading back to the east coast for a week to visit family and friends and although the idea sounds great...I'm starting to feel a bit apprehensive.

I haven't made many friends out here and haven't actually relied on my friends back home..

So I feel like I'm in limbo. A week full of fun and then back to the same old shyte.

Worse, I'm having trouble finishing my school work because the instructor decided to make this the busiest week of the course. I wanted to get everything done before actually going on vacation, and now it looks like that's not going to happen.

I'm going through a burnout period and have decided to just push through it as I always do.

It's kind of like my emotions...they exist...things hurt and make me angry and upset and happy etc...but I just don't feel like I have time to let those things manifest in the open, so I shove them back inside for a later date. The same goes for my burntness and stress...I'll just stuff it back down and keep working as though it doesn't exist.

hopefully my mind doesn't explode into a massive ball of lava before I complete my stupid degree.

in other news, I have officially decided that sleep is no longer a priority. I have since returned to my old ways of staying up until 3AM, getting up at 8AM for work, and pounding out classwork at the same time. A single small meal is sometimes thrown in around 8 or 9PM, but nothing more....no time...18+ hours at the computer makes me want to die.

Ok, so enough procrastinating...its time to get back to work...

Sometimes I wish I had never quite smoking...and other times I wish I had never started....

]]> ~iamsketch http://iamsketch.deviantart.com/journal/28253196/ http://iamsketch.deviantart.com/journal/28253196/ Mon, 09 Nov 2009 18:49:50 PST
I still have a 4.0 GPA at school after completing my fourth class.

Work is still here.

My Muse is still nowhere to be found.

I am sick.

I am tired.

My car is not feeling well either.

I am hungry.

and finally, I think this lack of friends is starting to take its toll on me.

I have not hung out with anyone in over a year and I have not hung out with anyone on a regular basis in probably 5 years.

I NEED ATTENTION!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

and not the sexual kind...

That is all

]]> ~iamsketch http://iamsketch.deviantart.com/journal/27363541/ http://iamsketch.deviantart.com/journal/27363541/ Tue, 22 Sep 2009 18:48:02 PDT
]]> ~iamsketch http://iamsketch.deviantart.com/journal/26843392/ http://iamsketch.deviantart.com/journal/26843392/ Wed, 26 Aug 2009 18:46:49 PDT
It's a sketch of a random floating piece of rock with people living on it out in space. Theres a story behind it, but I've been drawing this using my netbook and wacom bamboo. Seriously a bad idea...especially since it's not very good and I could have done it in 2 hours as opposed to the 7 I've already put into it. It's just that I'm not that good with the tablet yet and lacking the rotate canvas ability that PS has in comparison to gimp, is truly and difficult thing to overcome.

I'm not very happy with my work so far, but I shall press on and finish it using the wacom and my netbook, just to say I have.

Sometimes the art itself is not the final outcome, but the steps taken to achieve your goal.

Migraine headaches FTW 0.o;

]]> ~iamsketch http://iamsketch.deviantart.com/journal/26803373/ http://iamsketch.deviantart.com/journal/26803373/ Mon, 24 Aug 2009 18:37:25 PDT
I haven't. But I've been wondering recently if I really have any talent at all or if I'm just really really good at faking it...even to myself 0.o;

:sigh:

Who knows..I do often wish that I was as good as some of my friends on here.

:thumb103816923: [link]
:thumb112899884: [link]
:thumb102484896: [link]
:thumb106199096: [link]

Just to name a few. Sometimes I feel like I've produced something that's pretty good, but I just don't like it as much as I like everyone else's work.

I work the normal 40 hour work week. I go to school online. I go out every now and then with my girlfriend, but I just can't sit myself down to create anything.

SO FRUSTRATING!!!!

Sometimes I think I should just stop trying, but those thoughts are taken over by ideas....BUT I CAN NEVER GET THE IDEAS INTO PHYSICAL EXISTENCE THE WAY I WANT THEM!!!

OK ok ok, I'm done ranting. I'll probably be all calmed down by the time I get home anyway.

yes, 44 miles home again...I just can't get over it. Not even after a year of doing it.

BTW the worst part is, I'm stuck using my netbook until I can figure out what the crap is wrong with my desktops. And Yes, its much harder than it sounds...I'm having power supply and board problems and I can't afford a new one of either...so I'm trying to fix them by hand with my soldering iron.

If I could find the damn thing that is.

Well, time to lockup the office and get ready to leave.



]]> ~iamsketch http://iamsketch.deviantart.com/journal/26678602/ http://iamsketch.deviantart.com/journal/26678602/ Tue, 18 Aug 2009 18:55:32 PDT
I've been working and started going to school full time and I quit smoking a bit over a month ago.

I haven't visited home in over a year, but I have had the chance to see my parents twice. I haven't seen any of my friends in over a year and my luck at making additional friends out here has been far from acceptable.

I'm depressed. I'm not crying or having eating problems or sleeping problems. Hell I'm still able to have fun too, but I'm definitely depressed and I don't know why.

other than the above that is.

I think I'm going to try to deviate a bit tonight...maybe it'll spark something..

Well, i need to shut down the office now and get going. 44 mile drive home in California Traffic at 7PM....shoot me..please

I love you all...goodnight.

]]> ~iamsketch http://iamsketch.deviantart.com/journal/24757839/ http://iamsketch.deviantart.com/journal/24757839/ Thu, 14 May 2009 17:09:40 PDT _<

]]> ~iamsketch http://iamsketch.deviantart.com/journal/21680607/ http://iamsketch.deviantart.com/journal/21680607/ Wed, 26 Nov 2008 12:28:49 PST
Just been really busy what with work and life and all...I've recently picked up the saxophone again after years of neglecting my love of jazz. My girlfriend has been doing amazing things with the UCDSO and I have also been working on my electronic musica...

I'm also starting a non-profit to give underfunded schools a chance at a music program...

Anywho, I feel that tonight shall be a night of deviation and PlayStation Home Beta. ^^.

See you all very soon as I will be attacking teh chats.

]]> ~iamsketch http://iamsketch.deviantart.com/journal/19415153/ http://iamsketch.deviantart.com/journal/19415153/ Tue, 15 Jul 2008 18:26:29 PDT
My job isn't horrible, but recently we've lost some employees and with the hiring freeze it fucks us...that and they added more shit for us to do.

fuck that

i was supposed to get a package today, it didnt come

i was supposed to get my paycheck today

Mailbox was empty

I'm broke and really fuckin needed the money...so now im fucked

that is all

]]> ~iamsketch http://iamsketch.deviantart.com/journal/18471244/ http://iamsketch.deviantart.com/journal/18471244/ Fri, 23 May 2008 22:20:00 PDT
This is my second shift of ConOps base and it's a bit crazy, though right now its chilled a bit.

I'm enjoying this though, although its work, and over 30 hours of it at that on my vacation weekend. But I'm meeting some wonderful people and seeing an abundance of beautiful cosplay ^_^.

Everyone has been extremely nice to me and I hope to make some wonderful lasting friendships.

Hehe, kinda funny though, I was all psyched about the con and yet i've spent most of it at ConOps base hehe.

tomorro is my 12 hours shift and it should be insane. Tonight is simply an 8 hour.

Well, not much to say, but I'm sure I'm going to get some amazing photos to manip from this.

Well, if any of you are out here, hit me up at the ConOps base until 2am this evening, or tomorrow between 4pm and 4am. I will probably be wearing a tuxedo ^_^

ok see ya

]]> ~iamsketch