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        <title>deviantART: by:kaylakaiba</title>
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        <pubDate>Thu, 10 Dec 2009 15:17:01 PST</pubDate>        
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                <title>i like cartoons so i must be irresponsible</title>
                <link>http://kaylakaiba.deviantart.com/journal/25146428/</link>
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                <pubDate>Fri, 05 Jun 2009 15:39:21 PDT</pubDate>
                
                <description><![CDATA[ I WOULD LIKE TO POINT OUT THAT I DID NOT CREATE THIS LIST BUT MERELY STARTED THE SIGGY THINGY.<br /><br />I'm EMO, so I MUST cut my wrists.<br /><br />I'm BLACK, so I MUST carry a gun.<br /><br />I'm HISPANIC, so I MUST be dirty.<br /><br />I'm ASIAN, so I MUST be smart.<br /><br />I'm NOT LIKE EVERYONE ELSE, so I MUST be a loser.<br /><br />I'm JEWISH, so I MUST be greedy.<br /><br />I'm GAY, so I MUST have AIDS.<br /><br />I'm a LESBIAN, so I MUST have a sex-tape.<br /><br />I'm ARAB, so I MUST be a terrorist.<br /><br />I SPEAK MY MIND, so I MUST be a bitch.<br /><br />I'm OVERWEIGHT, so I MUST have a problem with self control.<br /><br />I'm RELIGIOUS, so I MUST shove my beliefs down your throat.<br /><br />I'm an ATHEIST, so I MUST hate the world.<br /><br />I DON'T HAVE A RELIGION, so I MUST not have morals.<br /><br />I'm REPUBLICAN, so I MUST not care about poor people.<br /><br />I'm DEMOCRAT, so I MUST not believe in being responsible.<br /><br />I'm JAMICAN so I must smoke weed.<br /><br />I am LIBERAL, so I MUST be gay.<br /><br />I'm SOUTHERN, so I MUST be white trash.<br /><br />I TAKE ANTI-DEPRESSANTS, so I MUST be crazy.<br /><br />I'm a GUY, so I MUST only want to get into your pants.<br /><br />I'm IRISH, so I MUST have a bad drinking problem.<br /><br />I'm INDIAN, so I MUST own a convenient store.<br /><br />I'm NATIVE AMERICAN, so I MUST dance around a fire screaming like a savage.<br /><br />I'm PREPPY, so I MUST shun those who don't wear Abercrombie & Hollister.<br /><br />I'm a CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be a stuck up whore.<br /><br />I'm on a DANCE team, so I must be stupid, stuck up, and a whore.<br /><br />I wear skirts a lot, so I MUST be a slut.<br /><br />I'm a PUNK, so I MUST do drugs.<br /><br />I'm YOUNG, so I MUST be naive.<br /><br />I'm RICH, so I MUST be a conceited snob.<br /><br />I WEAR BLACK, so I MUST be a goth.<br /><br />I'm BLONDE, so I MUST be a stupid ditz.<br /><br />I'm a WHITE GIRL, so I MUST be a nagging, steal-your-money kind of girlfriend.<br /><br />I'm CUBAN, so I MUST spend my spare time rolling cigars.<br /><br />I'm MEXICAN, so I MUST have hopped the border.<br /><br />I'm NOT A VIRGIN, so I MUST be easy.<br /><br />I FELL IN LOVE WITH A MARRIED MAN, so I MUST be a home-wrecking whore.<br /><br />I'm a TEENAGE MOM, so I MUST be an irresponsible slut.<br /><br />I'm POLISH, so I MUST wear my socks with my sandals.<br /><br />I'm ITALIAN, so I must have a big peter.<br /><br />I GOT A CAR FOR MY BIRTHDAY, so I MUST be a spoiled brat.<br /><br />I'm PRETTY, so I MUST not be a virgin.(is this stuck up or just self esteem?)<br /><br />I HAVE STRAIGHT A'S, so I MUST have no social life.<br /><br />I DYE MY HAIR CRAZY COLORS, so I MUST be looking for attention.<br /><br />I DRESS IN UNUSUAL WAYS so I MUST be looking for attention.<br /><br />I'm INTO THEATER ART, so I MUST be a homosexual.<br /><br />I'm a VEGETARIAN, so I MUST be a crazy political activist.<br /><br />I HAVE A BUNCH OF GUY FRIENDS, so I MUST be fucking them all.<br /><br />I HAVE A BUNCH OF GIRLS WHO ARE FRIENDS, so I MUST be gay.<br /><br />I HAVE BIG BOOBS, so I MUST be a whore.<br /><br />I'm COLOMBIAN, so I MUST be a drug dealer.<br /><br />I WEAR WHAT I WANT, so I MUST be a poser.<br /><br />I'm RUSSIAN, so I MUST be cool.<br /><br />I'm GERMAN, so I MUST be a Nazi.<br /><br />I hang out with GAYS, so I MUST be GAY TOO<br /><br />I'm BRAZILIAN, so I MUST have a BIG BUTT.<br /><br />I'm PUERTO RICAN, so I MUST look good and be conceited.<br /><br />I'm SALVADORIAN, so I MUST be in MS 13.<br /><br />I'm POLISH, so I MUST be greedy.<br /><br />I'm HAWAIIAN, so I MUST be lazy.<br /><br />I'm a STONER, so I MUST be going in the wrong direction.<br /><br />I'm a VIRGIN, so I MUST be a prude.<br /><br />I'm a FEMALE GAMER, so I MUST be ugly or crazy.<br /><br />I'm BLACK, so I MUST love watermelon and fried chicken.<br /><br />I'm BI, so I MUST think every person I see is hot.<br /><br />I'm ASIAN, so I MUST have a small penis.<br /><br />I'm a GUY CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be gay.<br /><br />I'm SKINNY, so I MUST be anorexic.<br /><br />I'm PREP, so I MUST be rich.<br /><br />I dont like the SUN so I MUST be albino.<br /><br />I have a lot of FRIENDS, so I MUST love to drink and party.<br /><br />I wear tight PANTS and I'm a guy, so I MUST be emo.<br /><br />Im adding some<br /><br />I couldn't hurt a FLY, So I MUST be a pussy.<br /><br />I support GAY RIGHTS, so I MUST fit in with everyone.<br /><br />I hang out with teenaged drinkers and smokers, so I MUST smoke and drink too.<br /><br />Im CHRISTIAN, so I MUST hate gay people.<br /><br />I have ARTISTIC TALENT, so I MUST think little of those who don't.<br /><br />I don't like to be in a BIG GROUP, so I MUST be anti-social.<br /><br />I have a DIFFERENT sence of HUMOR, so I MUST be crazy. <br /><br />I tell people OFF, so I MUST be an overcontrolling bitch.<br /><br />My hair gets GREASY alot, so I MUST have no hygiene skills.<br /><br />Im... ]]></description>
                <author>~kaylakaiba</author>
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          <item>
                <title>christmas</title>
                <link>http://kaylakaiba.deviantart.com/journal/22204066/</link>
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                <pubDate>Fri, 26 Dec 2008 05:18:30 PST</pubDate>
                
                <description><![CDATA[ first off merry christmas or whatever holiday you celebrate everyone. i wanted to thank everyone who's added me as a friend or liked my art work.<br />also i want to say thank you to ninja_rukia, deidara16016, blaqmoon , kaity (couldn't remember your name sorry)and finally lolipopkyo for supporting me in everything i do and telling me i should post more stories.<br /><br />and now i would like to hear what all my friends got for christmas or your holiday. me i got 115 dollars total from all my grandparents and a new dvd player and clothes from my `rents.<br /><br />HAPPY HOLIDAYS EVERYONE<br /><br />my clubs :sasunarufanclubicon:<br /><br /> ]]></description>
                <author>~kaylakaiba</author>
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                <title>funny jokes</title>
                <link>http://kaylakaiba.deviantart.com/journal/21802698/</link>
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                <pubDate>Wed, 03 Dec 2008 16:18:22 PST</pubDate>
                
                <description><![CDATA[ When I was a young minister, a funeral director asked me to hold a grave side service for a homeless man with no family or friends. The funeral was to be at a cemetery way out in the country. This was a new cemetery and this man was the first to be laid to rest there.<br /><br />I was not familiar with the area and became lost. Being a typical man, of course, I did not ask for directions. I finally found the cemetery about an hour late. The back hoe was there and the crew was eating their lunch. The hearse was nowhere to be seen.<br /><br />I apologized to the workers for being late. As I looked into the open grave, I saw the vault lid already in place. I told the workers I would not keep them long, but that this was the proper thing to do. The workers, still eating their lunch, gathered around the opening.<br /><br />I was young and enthusiastic and poured out my heart and soul as I preached. The workers joined in with, "Praise the Lord," "Amen," and "Glory!" I got so into the service that I preached and preached and preached, from Genesis to The Revelation.<br /><br />When the service was over, I said a prayer and walked to my car. As I opened the door, I heard one of the workers say, "I never saw anything like that before and I've been putting in septic systems for twenty years."<br /><br />BEDSIDE MANNERS<br /><br />Susie's husband had been slipping in and out of a coma for several months. Things looked grim, but she was by his bedside every single day. One day as he slipped back into consciousness, he motioned for her to come close to him. She pulled the chair close to the bed and leaned her ear close to be able to hear him.<br /><br />"You know" he whispered, his eyes filling with tears, "you have been with me through all the bad times. When I got fired, you stuck right beside me. When my business went under, there you were. When we lost the house, you were there. When I got shot, you stuck with me. When my health started failing, you were still by my side. "And you know what?"<br /><br />"What, dear?" she asked gently, smiling to herself.<br /><br />"I think you're bad luck."<br /><br />IMPLEMENTS OF MATH DESTUCTION<br /><br />At New York's Kennedy airport today an individual, later discovered to be a public school teacher, was arrested trying to board a flight while in possession of a ruler, a protractor, a square, a slide rule, and a calculator.<br /><br />The Attorney General believes the man is a member of the notorious Al-gebra movement. He is being charged with carrying weapons of math instruction.<br /><br />"Al-gebra is a very fearsome cult, indeed", the Attorney General said. "They desire average solutions by means and extremes, and sometimes go off on a tangent in a search of absolute value. They consist of quite shadowy figures, with names like "x" and "y", and, although they are frequently referred to as "unknowns", we know they really belong to a common denominator and are part of the axis of medieval with coordinates in every country.<br /><br />"As the great Greek philanderer Isosceles used to say, there are three sides to every triangle." When asked to comment on the arrest, President Bush said, "If God had wanted us to have better weapons of math instruction, He would have given us more fingers and toes."<br /><br />DOGGONE BRILLIANT JOKE<br /><br />A wealthy man decided to go on a safari in Africa. He took his faithful pet dachshund along for company. One day, the dachshund starts chasing butterflies and before long the dachshund discovers that he is lost.<br /><br />So, wandering about, he notices a leopard heading rapidly in his direction with the obvious intention of having him for lunch. The dachshund thinks, "OK, I'm in deep trouble now!" Then he noticed some bones on the ground close by, and immediately settles down to chew on the bones with his back to the approaching cat. Just as the leopard is about to leap, the dachshund exclaims loudly, "Boy, that was one delicious leopard. I wonder if there are any more around here." Hearing this, the leopard halts his attack in mid-stride, as a look of terror comes over him, and slinks away into the trees. "Whew," says the leopard. "That was close. That dachshund nearly had me." Meanwhile, a monkey, who had been watching the whole scene from a nearby tree, figures he can put this knowledge to good use and trade it for protection from the leopard. So, off he goes.<br /><br />But the dachshund saw him heading after the leopard with great speed, and figured that something must be up.<br /><br />The monkey soon catches up with the leopard, spills the beans and strikes a deal for himself with the leopard. The leopard is furious at being made a fool of and says, "Here monkey, hop on my back and see what's going to happen to that conniving canine." Now the dachshund sees the leopard coming with the monkey on his back, and thinks, "What am I going to do now?" But instead of running, the dog sits down with his back to his attackers, pretendin... ]]></description>
                <author>~kaylakaiba</author>
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          <item>
                <title>my B-DAY</title>
                <link>http://kaylakaiba.deviantart.com/journal/21679400/</link>
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                <pubDate>Wed, 26 Nov 2008 11:15:22 PST</pubDate>
                
                <description><![CDATA[ guess what my b-days tomorrow ^___^ and i just wanted to say hi to all my friends on here lolz. thats all <br /><br />sincerly <br />kk<br /><br /> ]]></description>
                <author>~kaylakaiba</author>
            </item>
          <item>
                <title>yay looky what i gots on a quiz</title>
                <link>http://kaylakaiba.deviantart.com/journal/20107630/</link>
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                <pubDate>Sat, 23 Aug 2008 05:10:49 PDT</pubDate>
                
                <description><![CDATA[ first off let me apologize for not being on in so long and let me thank jacketfulofdanger for posting this quiz in her journal i got innocent uke lolz and her<img src="http://www.semeuke.com/images/ilp.gif" border=0><br /><p><b>You are an Innocent Uke!</b><br><br />Cute and sweet, and most gentle of all uke, whips and chains are not for you - you just want someone to love you. You are often spotted in candy shops wearing furry kitty ears, where you are sure to be noticed by the Romantic Seme, whose protective instincts will kick in and will only want to take you home and love and protect you. And you, of course, will be more than happy to spend the rest of your life baking cookies for your seme. <p><br /><b>Most compatible with:</b> Romantic Seme<br><br /><b>Least compatible with:</b> Sadistic Seme, Don't Fuck With Me Seme<p><br />What seme or uke are you? Take the experience at <a href="http://www.semeuke.com">SemeUke.com</a>, or find merchandise <a href="http://www.gesshoku.org">here</a>.<br />es the link<br /><br /></p></br></p></br></p> ]]></description>
                <author>~kaylakaiba</author>
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