http://search.deviantart.com/?q=by:kbxshadow&section=today deviantART RSS for by:kbxshadow en-us Copyright 2009, deviantART.com Sat, 05 Dec 2009 17:42:11 PST deviantART.com http://blogs.law.harvard.edu/tech/rss http://s.deviantart.com/minish/widgets/apple-touch-icon-precomposed.png http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/28472125/ http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/28472125/ Fri, 20 Nov 2009 16:15:54 PST supersmasher025 that I'd have the names and such of the geographic locations I have so far. It turns out one piece of paper wasn't enough to sufficiently draw the map of my intentions, but that's why there's multiple pieces of paper.

For people who would like to see their characters in this story: geographic locations mean you're going to have to start thinking of elemental affinities, as well as what class your character will be in this world. W00t, yeah? Elements will be listed with their respective continent/country, as well as major cities and villages. Most of these words are weird, so I'll have little pronunciation thingies next to them. Red bullets mean it's the capital of the country.

Continent: Onaperse (o na purse)
Element: None
Countries: Ananse (un nontz), Onaperse, Chuden
Major Cities: Port Anan (anon), Terff (turf) Village, Sema (seh ma) Village, Ananse Town, Lanay Port, Onaperse City, Myan (mai ahn) Town, Maen (main) Port, Akas (ah cuss) Village, Pell Port, Chuden Port

Continent: Eternia
Element: Light
Countries: None
Major Cities: Crias (kree us) Town, Nalia (nah leea) Village, Nionas (neo nus) City, Port Celan (seh len), Havenport, Eternia City
Major Landmarks: Gatepoint, Effulgence Point

Continent: Xemif (zem if)
Element: Spirit
Countries: Aranfa (aran fa), Tayrar, Mienma (mean ma), Naynalu (nay nuhlu), Fenseer
Major Cities: Spirit Point

Continent: Kioma (key ohma)
Element: Aura
Countries: None
Major Cities: Tenasca (ten us ka) City
Major Landmarks: Gatepoint

Continent: Sephone (seh fuh nee)
Element: Darkness
Countries: None
Major Cities: Flowsen (flow sen), Imard (ih marred)

Continent: Rairden (rare din)
Element: Wind
Countries: Selesta, Nemair (nih mare), Iflowna (ih flown ah)
Major Cities: Tania (taw ney ah) Port, Murst City, Flesta Town, Traes (tra ess) Town, Port Remna, Esass (eh suss) City, Mafli (maw flee) City, Rasni (rawz ney) Town, Port Tenarsa
Major Landmarks: Athnius Point, Rairden Archipelago

Continent: Thoracia (thor ay she ah)
Element: Lightning
Countries: None
Major Cities: Tempest Port

Continent: Halucon (hal u kon)
Element: Earth
Countries: Reta, Xilan (zee lawn), Phaili (fail ey)
Major Cities: Virat (vee rawt) City, Sanium (say nee em) Town, Port Reta, Merra (mare ah) Village, Filis Town, Halucon Port, Orichalcum Post, Tienna Village, Inara (ee naw ra) Town, Gaia City, Tendes Town
Major Landmarks: Orichalcum Post

Continent: Stryxon (stricks on)
Element: Fire
Countries: Piquaisi (pick way see), Vaal (val), Shehas (sheh hoss), Haras (Haar oss), Vellum
Major Cities: Port Efri, Anmar City, Gaam (gom) Village, Nevha City, Stryx City, Port Lafi (laugh ee), Mezis (meh zis) Town, Ezeki Port, Iat (ee awt) Town, Yirid Town, Cendi (sendee) Village, Akunets Village, Port Tanit, Tanit Village, Vellum City

Continent: Honankyou (ho nahn kyou)
Element: Ice
Countries: None
Major Cities: Port Kalak (call ack)

Continent: Seidona (sai doh na)
Element: Water
Countries: None
Major Cities: Kanara (kuh nar ah), Serein (sir ein), Valsern, Pazya

Continent: Athnius
Element: Dragon
Countries: None
Major Cities: Rathnevius City
Major Landmarks: Rairden Point

Okay, some general rules on elemental affinities:
-- Being an e... ]]> ~kbxshadow http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/28438249/ http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/28438249/ Wed, 18 Nov 2009 17:53:57 PST Light's Blood was at its end. The original concepts I had for it were so much better than the garbage I'm coming up with now. It's discouraging me too much and it's holding me up from working on anything else. So after I finish this journal (give or take a few minutes), I'm deleting Light's Blood from fanfiction.net.

I have compensation, though!

Since the last idea for an original fiction didn't go over so well, I'm thinking about it again. But this time, I'm staying in my familiar world: fantasy. I haven't quite gotten a plot down yet, but I'm already looking for OCs for this thing. I kinda think it's the characters that shape a story.

Granted, the majority of the characters in this story will be my own, and I'm thinking about going around and asking people to see if I can use their characters (mind that I said characterS). But I open the question to you people. If there are any characters that you would like for me to use, tell me via comments. I'll keep those characters in mind.

One thing you need to realize, though, is that I absolutely will not make any game references. All of the concepts I think of will be from my hurricane of a brain. Therefore, if it's difficult for you to adapt your characters to original fiction, then I highly suggest refraining from giving me that character, because I WILL change some features of that character to better suit my purposes. You'll see that the majority of my characters will go through some pretty drastic changes to their backgrounds to work within my fic too.

So, as far as fic plot goes, I'll start the fic once I have everything laid out.

Characters? Well...here are my characters that I know for sure will be in it:

Kevyn Sailon
Reeon Mailera
Mark Seylo
Aliana Shikarume
Astarot
Azariah Pellsi

I'm not sure how I'm going to work out Azariah's character consider what she is to Kevyn, but it'll all work out some way, somehow.

So I leave the question open to you guys, 'kay?

Expect an upload on this site in the near future.

~~+++===+++===+++~~



~~+++===+++===+++~~
I still remember the ways that you touched me
Now I know I don't mean anything to you
You're Easy Breezy, and I'm Japanesy
Soon you'll mean exactly nothing to me
Does that mean anything to you?
~Utada Hikaru, Easy Breezy


~kbxshadow

]]> ~kbxshadow http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/27969520/ http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/27969520/ Sun, 25 Oct 2009 22:16:10 PDT The Kite Runner. I really don't. Amir's making me mad because of his utter uselessness. But too bad. I have to read it for my English class. I really wish I didn't have to. I'm not fond of this book at all.

The way it's written though, it's great. It's pretty. I love the way it's written.

But the actual plotline and the character Amir. I wish I had a Megaton Hammer to beat the s*** out of him. Therefore I am grumpy about The Kite Runner.

Umm...I haven't done a lot of writing lately. I did write a cutesy little storylet, though. I'm typing it right now. Then I have mass revisions to make. Grah. But I did write a little something. Hehehe.

I've already started thinking about what I'll be writing for people this Christmas. If I ever get around to it, it'll be fun, I think.

Uh...sorry this is mostly like brain vomit right now. I just wanted to put up something else in my journal.

I've been watching the unrated, uncut, uncensored version of The Boondocks, courtesy of ~ProjectHyrule. Both of us really want to see the second season. It's hilarious but at the same time makes a point of satirizing contemporary suburban society. Me and PH are nuts for satires, you see?

Umm...I need something else to go on about.

Hmm...I don't want to talk about band.

I don't really have anything else to talk about.

So bye bye.

~~+++===+++===+++~~



~~+++===+++===+++~~
I don't wanna cross over
Between this genre, that genre
Between you and I
Is where I wanna cross over
Cross the line
I just wanna go further
Between here and there grow wiser
Together you and I
We can cross over as you and I
Only...
Only you can make me...
~Utada Hikaru, Crossover Interlude


~kbxshadow

]]> ~kbxshadow http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/27880370/ http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/27880370/ Wed, 21 Oct 2009 22:34:27 PDT Pride and Prejudice tags*

Okay, look, let me explain myself.

For AP English, I had to read Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen. At first, I wasn't too thrilled to read it because I knew the Old English (ish) nature of the book's language.

But then my teacher told me the book was a satire.

I got REALLY excited.

So I read the book. And weirdly enough, I understood a good 98% of it. There are still some passages that fuddle me a little, but I know exactly (pretty much) what's going on in the novel and how the characters develop.

First, I gotta make it clear that my absolute favorite character is the benevolent Mr. Fitzwilliam Darcy. Aaaaaah, Mr. Darcy...And it's not 'cause he makes 10,000 pounds a year. His character: I ABSOLUTELY LOVE IT. I mean, come on. Who wouldn't like the ultimate douchebag in the whole novel? Wickham? Man, Wickham's nothing. Wickham's your average horny debt-whore.

But Darcy? WOOOOO...Darcy's an asshole, and he knows it. That's the thing. He knows he's an ass. I don't necessarily blame him, either, because he does admit that he was taught to be as proud as his demeanor demanded, and to care nothing for people inferior to him or outside his family circle. And then, and then, he falls in love (of course) with Elizabeth Bennet, who (of course) IS in that inferior outer circle.

AND (of course) Darcy decides to propose to Lizzy. Let me colloquially summarize the scene:

Darcy: 'Kay, look, I've really been trying to keep myself from feeling this way, but because I seriously screwed myself over, I'm going to tell you how much I love you.
Lizzy: O.O;;;
Darcy: But see, you're poor compared to me. And I have family that would hate you because you're so poor, so it's actually not supposed to work. But I love you anyway. Wanna get married?
Lizzy: ...Fuck. No. You fucked up my sister's happiness as well as the life of Wickham (despite the fact I don't know he's a debt-whore yet). And I hate your living guts, so NO.

And that was Darcy's first proposal. Ah, but this is what's cute. CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT. Lizzy is obviously a dynamic character, but since the whole story is looking over her shoulder, her changes are slightly more subtle. In the case of Darcy, we see his change occur so quickly that we wonder if Austen really just gave him a happy pill.

But it's CUTE!!! The dramatic change in character in Darcy EXCITED me!! Which made me love Pride&rejudice that much more.

So I went and watched the movie.

And let me tell you. BBC's 1995 rendition of the book is most excellent. The characters are played extremely well, haha. Colin Firth does an AWESOME job of portraying Darcy, let me tell you.

...Though I think the lake scene was a stretch...But Youtube liked it: "COLIN FIRTH STRIPPING OFF." Nice going, guys, nice going. He was still in shirt and pants for crying out loud.

Anyway.

Let's just say that Pride&rejudice reawakened the idealistic little girl in me. And that's not good, because it means I'm thinking about cute little love stories that will never happen in real life. I NEED A DEPRESSING BOOK NOW. Actually, no, let me keep dwelling on these cute little love stories...I just might write them.

Since there ain't no way I'll end up with a boyfriend anytime soon. xD

So, I should leave for now and kinda run around in my mind's flowery fields of lovely happiness. Bye bye.

~~+++===+++===+++~~

Whoo, new stuff. I'm feeling a little cross right now for some random reason. Must be me thinking that I suffer the worst things in the world. Yeah, that sounds about right because as soon as I typed that, I felt more depressed and more cross. Awesome. Maybe this meme I stole off of ~Simimaelian will help remedy these negative feelings before I go get some sleep.

1. You can ONLY answer yes or no.

2. You are NOT ALLOWED to explain ANYTHING unless someone messages or comments to you and asks and believe me, the temptation to explain some of these will be overwhelming. Nothing is exactly as it seems.

Been arrested? — No
Kissed someone you didn’t like? — No
Slept in until 5 PM? — No
Fallen asleep at work/school? — Yes
Held a snake? — Yes
Ran a red light? — No
Been suspended from school? — No
Experienced love at first sight? — No
Totaled your car in an accident? — No
Been fired from a job? — No
Fire... ]]> ~kbxshadow http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/27786378/ http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/27786378/ Thu, 15 Oct 2009 18:50:05 PDT
Anywho, because I'm really feeling the character quiz thing, I stole this one off of . Haha, I WIN. And because I feel like it, I'll use my three main OCs, Kevyn, Reeon, and Aliana. WIN.

1. What is your character's name?
Kevyn: I'm Kevyn. My full legal name's Kevyn Amana Sailon, but just call me Kevyn.
Reeon: Reeon Cethin Mailera. Just call me Reeon, would you?
Aliana: Aliana Shikarume. I have no middle name.

2. What is your character's name in another language?
Kevyn&Reeon&Aliana: Uh...our names aren't even real names per se.
Kevyn: Maybe except for mine, haha.
Reeon: Actually, no. Your name's one of those weirder English names that has no translation in any other language.
Kevyn: Say what?!
Aliana: You heard him. You're weird.

3. How old is he/she?
Kevyn: 18.
Reeon: 19.
Aliana: 17.
Kevyn: WHOA, WHOA, WHOA, I'm OLDER than Aliana?!
Aliana: Biologically, yes, psychologically, no.

4. What is your character's race/species?
Kevyn: I'm Hylian, baby! Haha!!
Reeon: I'm...pretty human. With some Hylian blood. But no one knows that, shh.
Aliana: Human.

5. Do they have a crush?
Kevyn: *blush* Mm-hm!
Reeon: *scratches head* ...Yeeeeah...
Aliana: Mmm...I guess. Not really? Well...Hmm...That's a difficult question to answer.

6. Do they have many friends?
Kevyn: Hahaha, noooo~. But the ones I do have are my closest.
Reeon: Of course! I travel a lot, don't you see?
Aliana: People seem to like to think they're my friends, so I guess I do have many...I guess.

7. What planet is your character from?
Kevyn&Reeon&Aliana: We're video game fan characters. That's a bit DIFFICULT.

8. Does your character like to eat?
Kevyn: Oh~ yes~!
Reeon: Eh...Not really.
Aliana: *shrug*

9. What's his/her favorite food?
Kevyn: Breads!
Reeon: Soups. Dunno why, but I do.
Aliana: Clementines.

10. What's his/her favorite drink?
Kevyn: Fruit cordials.
Reeon: Ale.
Aliana: Wine.

11. Is your character annoying?
Kevyn: *shifty eyes*
Reeon: What?
Aliana: No.

13. Is your character loved?
Kevyn: Eh...Yes and no?
Reeon: HELL YES.
Aliana: Not really?

12. Is your character hated?
Kevyn: By a LOT of people, trust me.
Reeon: Naah...People love me too much.
Aliana: Definitely.

~~+++===+++===+++~~
Kevyn: OMG, what happened to questions 13 and 14?
Reeon: I dunno, any ideas?
Aliana: Idiots. Obviously they got lost during its times of being copied and pasted to people's journals.
Kevyn: Ah~. That makes sense.
Aliana: How much dumber can you get?
Reeon: Hey! Be nice to Kevyn! She's actually pretty damn smart!
Aliana: Okay, fine. I'll just say that she lacks common sense.
Kevyn: D:
~~+++===+++===+++~~

15. Is she/he emo/goth?
Kevyn: No!
Reeon: Um. No.
Aliana: No.

16. Is she/he an antagonist or protagonist?
Kevyn: Protagonist.
Reeon: Protagonist AND antagonist. Oh, what now?
Aliana: Not minding the dumbasses with me...Protagonist.

17. Is he/she violent?
Kevyn: Nah, not really. Luckily.
Reeon: Oh, I can get there. I can really get there if you piss me off enough.
Aliana: *evil smile* You seriously want to know?

18. Name 3 hobbies:
Kevyn: Stealing, archaeology, and treasures.
Reeon: Traveling, training, and Kevyn.
Aliana: Training, writing, and messing with people's minds.

19. Is your character normal?
Kevyn: Hahahaha, nooooooo, are you kidding me?
Reeon: Nope, I wouldn't consider myself normal.
Aliana: Define "normal" first, then I'll tell you.

20. Is your character attractive?
Kevyn: I guess?
Reeon: *looks over at mountain of presents and fan letters* I dunno, you tell me.
Aliana: *shrug*

21. How does your character handle emotions?
Kevyn: Good question. Hmm...I express my emotions while no one's watching.
Reeon: Handling emotions? Not very well. I'll let you know how I'm feeling right on the spot.
Aliana: I keep them to myself.

22. Does your character have other forms?
Kevyn: http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/27716552/ Sun, 11 Oct 2009 22:01:20 PDT
I can say I'm...angry, blank, okay, content, depressed, and frustrated all at the same time, I suppose.

Let's see if Kevyn's character meme will help me to feel any better.

101 Questions You Should Be Able to Answer About Your Character
(Must be in OC’s POV)

Character: Kevyn

BASICS

1. What is your full name? Do you have a nickname?
-- I think my full legal name is something like 'Kevyn Amana Sailon'. I haven't used it in forever. Anyway, people usually call me Kevyn. People who really hate me call me The Silver Vixen. I kinda like it. >D

2. How old are you? When is your birthday?
-- 18 and my birthday's July 13th.

3. Where were you born? Where do you live now? Are you patriotic?
-- I was born in the Eldin Province, specifically Kakariko Village. Because of what I do, I don't really stay in one place for long anymore; 'bout a week max when I'm taking a break in Castle Town. And though I'm a thief, I do love Hyrule.

4. Who are/were your parents? (Names, occupations, personalities, etc.)
-- Mum and Dad, Mara and Derek Sailon, were (in my thinning childhood memories) great. Mum was apparently some sort of descendant of the ancient Gerudo tribes, but she did honest work as a mother and housewife. ...Well, she did show me and my sister the ropes to all this thieving stuff. Dad was a pretty high-ranked official in the Royal Guard. People really respected him and all. It was kinda weird to have conflicting ideas from both parents, but they were great all the same...

5. Do you have any siblings? What are/were they like?
-- Yeah, my sister, Jessie Rayna Sailon. We're not to far apart in terms of age; she's 16. She's my only blood family left as far as I know, and though she's younger than me, she's definitely more cautious than me. She does have her more feisty moments, and people say she's a little more greedy for treasures than I am. I wonder about that.

6. What is your occupation?
-- Publicly, I'm a thief. Personally, I'm an archaeologist.

7. How tall are you? How much do you weigh?
-- Let's see...5'4" and 117 pounds.

8. What color is your hair? What color are your eyes?
-- Silver hair and amber eyes. Yeah, I look like a weirdo 'cause of the particular light mage's spirit I made a pact with.

9. What is your race?
-- Strongly Hylian.

10. To which social class do you belong?
-- Eh, thanks to my public reputation, I'm in the lower class.

11. Do you consider yourself to be attractive? Do others?
-- Attractive? Maybe to Reeon, I am, but I never thought of myself as attractive.

12. What is your style of dress?
-- Athletic and flowy. I'm a thief with style!

13. Do you have any scars? Tattoos? Birthmarks? Other unique physical features?
-- No scars, yes tattoos on my right arm, no birthmarks, and really nothing else.

14. Do you have any allergies, diseases, or other physical weaknesses?
-- No allergies, no diseases, and no other physical weaknesses as far as I know.

15. Are you right- or left-handed?
-- I'm a righty!

16. What does your voice sound like?
-- I'd say it's a little deep for a girl's voice, but I can say I don't have the smooth flowy voice of say, Princess Zelda or Ilia. Since I'm a little on the ill-bred side, my way of talking isn't pretty. I dunno...the voice I hear myself is different from the voice others hear.

17. What kind of vocabulary do you use?
-- People say I sound educated enough, but I really don't have the proper language of the higher ups. I really don't.

18. List three quirks or other defining characteristics.
-- I'm pretty darn athletic! Haha.
-- I'm really scared of dead things and ghosts.
-- I'm a light mage, though people like to label me "sage".

19. How often do you bathe? Do you wear perfumes?
-- I don't often have the chance to bathe, but I do whenever there's a body of water nearby or when I'm in any town or village. Perfumes are for higher-ups and they reveal me too easily, so I can't afford to wear them.

20. What kind of facial expression do you commonly wear (dour glare, wry smile, etc)?
-- People say I often have a really curious and inquisitive look if not a "toying smirk".

21. Do you use body language? How?
-- I think the most expressive body language I have is taking off running as fast as possible.

22. Do you have a commonly used saying?
-- Sorry, no.

CHILDHOOD

23. What is your earliest memory?
-- My earliest memory? Mmm...I think that was... ]]> ~kbxshadow http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/27668295/ http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/27668295/ Fri, 09 Oct 2009 13:09:28 PDT I'm excited just 'cause it's the first, but there's been...other things that have been bothering me really badly.

Luckily I'm at 's place right watching old Disney movies...ish. Our first in the old movie run is Space Jam. I love Space Jam just because I used to mistake Michael Jordan for my Dad. It took some time for my mother to convince me otherwise.

-sigh-

Sorry. Moment of blank, awkward, and stressed silence.

So I went to that creative writing club, just as I promised. And things are turning out pretty cool. I have to make character profile of sorts, and 'cause Reeon's my most versatile (and probably most well-balanced) character, I'll be abusing him a lot for this whole creative writing club thing.

Speaking of which, I HAVE started writing up the new plans for Light's Blood. It's going slowly, but definitely surely.

At any rate, I need something to distract me, so here goes another character meme.

...At a later moment. I'm going to go watch Space Jam.

]]> ~kbxshadow http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/27418122/ http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/27418122/ Fri, 25 Sep 2009 21:11:26 PDT
No updates.

At all.

Why?

My plans for Light's Blood disappeared!! And I can't find them so I have to write them up all over again...

Here's a sigh of depression. *sigh of depression*

~~+++===+++===+++~~



~~+++===+++===+++~~
Crawling in my skin
These wounds they will not heal
Fear is how they fall
Confusing what is real
~Linkin Park, Crawling

~kbxshadow

]]> ~kbxshadow http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/27193027/ http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/27193027/ Sun, 13 Sep 2009 14:42:23 PDT
At any rate, I plan to go ahead and go into this club this year. After all, I do want to try to major in it if I feel like psychology's not my thing. Don't get me wrong; psychology's a really interesting subject, but to go into a psychology career? I took the class this year to see if this was really something I wanted to go into. Creative writing, on the other hand, is something I know I want to do. I really like expressing myself, and because I feel I'm better with writing than drawing, writing's the best way to go for me. That and photography. Again, I'm taking the class this year to see if this is something I really want to do, so...yeah.

I'll still take my steps toward that creative writing club though. Wish me luck.

Speaking of creative writing, one of the hardest things about writing any kind of story is character. What is that character? How is the character going to develop over the course of the story? Will the character even change at all? How will the character interact with other characters? I like to think of fanfiction as the testing grounds for those OCs we so dearly love. OC interaction with the canon characters, I believe, helps me to establish what kind of personality I want my particular character to have.

And so, I stole this particular meme from in order to get my characters established a bit stronger. Hey, that's why I've been doing these memes anyway. I like my characters, and they've a lot they haven't told me yet. Memes and profiling are the best (if only) ways for me to get to know them better. The first character I want to know better...is Reeon.

101 Questions You Should Be Able to Answer About Your Character
(Must be in OC’s POV)

Character: Reeon

BASICS

1. What is your full name? Do you have a nickname?
-- Nah, everyone just calls me Reeon, because I'm not too fond of my whole name. Come on, 'Reeon Cethin Mailera'? You've got to be kidding me. That name just exudes villainry.

2. How old are you? When is your birthday?
-- 19. My birthday's October 29th...Whenever that is on the Hylian calendar

3. Where were you born? Where do you live now? Are you patriotic?
-- Me? I was born in Snowpeak. Been there until around three years ago. Then I came down into mainland Hyrule. I'm mainly in the Lanayru Province, but I'm a traveler, so it's hard to say where I exactly live. I guess I can say that I chill in Castle Town. And who can't be loyal to Princess Zelda?

4. Who are/were your parents? (Names, occupations, personalities, etc.)
-- Hehe, Pops and Mother...Pops' name's Yano Mailera and Mother's name's Nereis Mailera. As a family, we work as blacksmiths and alchemists - Pops has the blacksmith area and Mother's got the alchemist area. Pops is a pretty taciturn and antisocial guy, but if something excites him, he's a hardworking and amiable guy. He's my hero, you know. And Mother makes up for Pops' silence. She always provides me and my sister with all the love and knowledge she can give: she's my life-teacher and also the one I can cry to when I'm feeling "blah".

5. Do you have any siblings? What are/were they like?
-- Yeah, my sister, Selkiana. I call her Selkie, though; she's my adorable little sister. We're seven years apart: Selkie's 12. She's a cute little girl, but at the same time, she knows how to get on my nerves...She hates that I leave to travel, and often mocks me for it. Oh, and somehow she knows all of my little secrets. And yet more, she comforts me a lot. :\ What is with that child?

6. What is your occupation?
-- Currently, I'm just a traveling mercenary. Hopefully certain...difficulties I have will be dismissed and I can become a Hylian Knight. I'll show those cowards up.

7. How tall are you? How much do you weigh?
-- I'm pretty average. 5'11". And I guess lightweight, too. I'm at 148lbs.

8. What color is your hair? What color are your eyes?
-- My hair's black, my eyes're green.

9. What is your race?
-- Just a normal human...appearance-wise, anyway. Apparently I have Hylian blood within my veins...

10. To which social class do you belong?
-- .... ]]> ~kbxshadow http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/26924664/ http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/26924664/ Sun, 30 Aug 2009 20:35:31 PDT The Count of Monte Cristo. Wishbone cut off the story at the point where the Count revokes his revenge on his fiance's son, but it's Wishbone so I don't know how true that is.

All I know is Wishbone made The Count of Monte Cristo sound totally AWESOME. I wish we had SSR, 'cause I'd totally read it, but alas. College level English doesn't like SSR.

Uh...In the drawing department, I'm not up to anything. Now that I'm going into a little more advanced level of realistic art, I kinda have to focus away from the anime/manga style of things. But who knows? I'm hoping that after this class, I can bring out the details in my characters a little bit better.

In the writing department, I've managed to update Sanction of the Heart again. Whoopeedoo. You know, reviews are dying for my mainstream fics, so I'm wondering: are they getting boring? Then again, I'm not the best writer in the world so it makes sense if my fics are starting to bore everyone. :/ I just want to know, y'know?

So another week of school and marching band stuff starts tomorrow. Meaning I should go ahead and take off for now. See you later.

~~+++===+++===+++~~



~~+++===+++===+++~~
Don't go chasing waterfalls
Please stick to the rivers and the lakes that you're used to
I know that you're gonna have it your way or nothing at all
But I think you're moving too fast.
~TLC, Waterfalls


~kbxshadow

]]> ~kbxshadow http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/26770163/ http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/26770163/ Sun, 23 Aug 2009 20:19:41 PDT Light's Blood. It's not much, but it's something, hey? Comes to show I'm not entirely dead.

Besides that, I wanted to update something before things get really busy. Honestly, worst case scenario, I won't be able to even think about writing until the winter break. Yeah. Things are gonna get THAT busy.

On my end, I don't have much to say. Weird huh? I usually have something to ramble on about, but this time, I don't. It means I'm not depressed...yet.

And sorry about my lack of responses. I won't give excuses, but...yeah. Sorry.

EDIT: I pirated an OC meme from . Teehee. Here goes.

~Female OC meme~

1) Choose as many OCs as you want, but they must be female.
2) Have them answer the following questions or react to the situation.
3) Tag people or... something.

OCs:

Kevyn
Jessie
Aliana
Azariah

1) Say the first thing that comes to mind when you hear the word....jump?

Kevyn: Treasure?
Jessie: Treasure?
Aliana: For what?
Azariah: ...Pardon?

2) Do you consider yourself girly?

Kevyn: No.
Jessie: No.
Aliana: You're talking to a general here. Do you seriously expect me to indulge myself in those kinds of luxuries? No, of course not!
Azariah: Ahaha...I suppose I do. I may not have enough time for it, but I have my dreams. ^^

3) Why do you think guys are attracted to you?

Kevyn: Duh, I'm the perfect model. Light-skinned, exotic golden eyes, unusual silver hair, a lean athletic build, and most of all, I'm tricky! The guys love me!
Jessie: I dunno, I guess it's 'cause I'm Kevyn's little sister and also 'cause I'm a fire mage.
Aliana: I'm not entirely sure how to answer this one. I'd think my kind of personality scares off the men, but I'm surprised time and time again.
Azariah: I'm sorry, I'm not really sure...

4) Alright, let's get off the boring questions and move on to some other things. Let's try a situation....A man walks up to you and puts his arm around you, he pulls a few cheesy pick up lines and asks you to go get a drink with him...

Kevyn: Dude, look, if you want a date, you better have a bag of silver Rupees, and if not, then I can't promise you'll be sane after I deal with you.
Jessie: WHAT THE FUCK, STAY AWAY. *burn*
Aliana: ...I have two swords. They are well-sharpened. Would you like to be my testing medium?
Azariah: Please stay away from me. My light can pierce and burn flesh.

5) Do you think pink is a girl color?

Kevyn: I like it. ^^ Pink looks great on me.
Jessie: Yes, keep it away from me.
Aliana: It trumpets vulnerability.
Azariah: No, I actually like to think pink is a dull shade of red, and red is Goddess Din's color and also the symbol for Power, which men are often associated with. So I believe pink is a male color.

6) What about ruling a country.....ever think you could do that?

Kevyn: No. Too much responsibility.
Jessie: Nah. Too much responsibility.
Aliana: I suppose I could if given the chance.
Azariah: I'm told I'm too humble to be ruler of such a vast number of people.

7) There's rumors going around you have a secret crush.....is it true?

Kevyn: *long pause* It's VEEEERY complicated.
Jessie: Kinda sorta not really.
Aliana: W-w-w-wait, who told you?!
Azariah: No, not me. We're just close friends, that person and me.

8) Do you think women can do anything a man can do?

Kevyn: Not everything. See, a girl can start out stronger than a boy, but as they grow older, the boy builds more muscle than the girl will ever have. So there are some things women can't do while men can. It's a sad truth.
Jessie: Of course anything! As long as we put our minds to it and focus, there's nothing women can't do!
Aliana: Please recall that I'm a general. It's not traditional for a woman to be in such a high position.
Azariah: Just as there are some things women can do better than men, there are things that men can do better than women. Our society is built on a patriarchal tradition...*goes into a long lecture*

9) If you had an imaginary friend, what would you name him/her?

Kevyn: Maybe something like "Kosmo".
Jessie: "Tiny".
Aliana: This is ridiculous...Skip me.
Azariah: I'd name it after one of my friends. Maybe "Rina" or "Lehroth".

10) Look at the girls next to you in this tag...could you beat any one of them up?

Kevyn: Jessie and Azariah, no problem. Jessie's my sister, and Azariah's my spiritual ancestor, alias she screwed my whole life up. T... ]]> ~kbxshadow http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/26555789/ http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/26555789/ Wed, 12 Aug 2009 19:31:35 PDT
Actually, I'm in quite a fix of pain right now. Not as bad as the years of marching band before, but drum majoring is its own little painful cult, methinks. But it's fun stuff, and I'm really glad I'm doing it.

So because of that and also 'cause it's AUGUST, I won't be able to show up as much. Teardrop, boohoo.

But then again, who really cares? I show up when I show up, and that's that, right?

So other than that, I don't have much to say. Turning in way earlier than before to sleep off the muscle sores and all.

I really need a massage.

~~+++===+++===+++~~



~~+++===+++===+++~~

Somebody out there better get this
Not many people can do it like this
How about some speakers to amplify me?
How about a rhyme to fortify me?
Life's messy so I clarify it
Simplifying things for everybody...
~Utada Hikaru,Animato


~kbxshadow

]]> ~kbxshadow http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/26215888/ http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/26215888/ Mon, 27 Jul 2009 16:21:54 PDT
I've been away at camp...Yeah...And now I'm sore all over. Thanks to the activities I had to do while at camp, I think I have some slight case of carpal tunnel in my left wrist. I dunno. Never been diagnosed with it or anything, so I couldn't be sure what to say. I just know that I can't put any excessive force or weight on that wrist of mine. And depending on which direction I turn it in, it hurts.

;_;

Anyway, I'll update something here on devART shortly, so here's some background information on it.

First of all, you'll see the title and probably say "Oh, kbx is actually not writing something dark and eerie and creepy." Well, don't say that, and don't count on it. I guess it started kinda sorta happy, but as it keeps progressing, it kinda...darkens. So if you feel slightly creeped out, you're not the only one, okay?

Umm...things will start getting busy for me, methinks. I can't promise anything, so...I'll leave that kinda open-ended for now. -_-

I don't have much to say, really, without going into some long rambling useless whining rant that questions my sense of self-worth and undermines myself. And then blaming that on Dad. -_- I do that a lot, and I feel like a total ass when I start explaining myself, so after this, I keep everything to myself. I'm not troubling youse anymore.

Anyway, look forward to that little update. See you later.

~~+++===+++===+++~~



~~+++===+++===+++~~

Maybe there's a devil
(or something like it) inside
Maybe there's a devil
(or something like it) inside of me
Devil
(or something like it)
Inside
Maybe there's a devil
(somewhere really) deep inside me
Devil
Inside of me
Jealous angel deep inside me...
~Utada Hikaru, Devil Inside


~kbxshadow

]]> ~kbxshadow http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/25865611/ http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/25865611/ Fri, 10 Jul 2009 17:55:52 PDT
Uh...First is yesterday. I got dragged to the Boardwalk yesterday. Fun stuff. We were out all day, which was I never signed on. Fun stuff. Even though I only got on three rides. But please don't blame me. I really seriously can't take spinning rides anymore, and even more so when I'm dehydrated. I need water. D: Anyway. I got on two roller coasters and one dropping ride. That was fun. I felt the essence of thrill for the first time in a couple of years. And then I had pizza, breadsticks, and a corn dog. That corn dog was awesome.

Then today. Uh...Hair appointment today. Went and got my hair all chemical'd and touched up so that it was all nice and pretty and straight again. Except my hairstylist loves me dearly, and I also told her that I had senior portraits today, so she decided to add a bit of bounce to my hair. And makeup on my face. It turned out really nicely - my hairstylist is the bomb as a makeup artist. I really can't stand the feeling of oils and powders and mascara and blush and all that on my face, but I decided "Hey. It's my senior portrait." And 'cause I knew she was a pro. And it turned out awesome.

Senior portraits were okay too. I never knew I could be so pretty.

Tomorrow I have work from 9AM to about noon. I don't mind the work. I just feel bad that the soonest I'll be able to talk with some of you is tomorrow afternoon. Why not this evening, you ask? Well, I'm still feeling a little tired, is all. I'll need a good rest today for work tomorrow, but I'll be back. I promise.

But if you really need to get in touch with me for some reason, there are other methods. You just need to find them for yourself.

I'll see some of you peeps tomorrow then! Take care!

So now for a quiz thingy I migrated from Facebook:

USING ONLY ONE WORD! It's not as easy as you might think! Copy and change the answers to suit you and pass it on. It's really hard to only use one word answers. Be sure to tag the person you received it from!

1. Where is your cell phone? Bed.
2. Your significant other? Secret.
3. Your hair? Shoulder.
4. Your mother? Sleeping.
5. Your father? Away.
6. Your favorite thing? Writing.
7. Your dream last night? Depressing.
8. Your favorite drink? Juice.
9. Your dream/goal? Psychotherapist.
10. What room you are in? Dining.
11. Your hobby? Writing.
12. Your fear? Hatred.
13. Where do you want to be in 6 years? Florida.
14. Where were you last night? Boardwalk.
16. Muffins? Chocolate.
17. Wish list item? Nothing.
18. Where you grew up? Places.
19. Last thing you did? Shower.
20. What are you wearing? Clothes.
21. Your TV? On.
22. Your pets? None.
23. Friends? Alone.
24. Your life? Fuck.
25. Your mood? Neutral.
26. Missing some one? Perhaps.
27. Car? Carport.
28. Something you're not wearing? Socks.
29. Your favorite store? None.
30. Your favorite color? Red.
33. When is the last time you laughed? Today.
34. Last time you cried? Days.
35. Who will resend this? Pirates.
36. One place that you go to over and over? Home.
37. One person who emails you regularly? None.
38. Your favorite place to eat? None.
39. Why you participated in this survey? Felt.
40. What are you doing tonight? Sleeping.

~~+++===+++===+++~~



~~+++===+++===+++~~
How can I adjust
To the way
That things are going?
It's killing me slowly
I just want it to be
How it used to be.
'Cause I wish
That I could stay
But in time things must change
So it shouldn't be so bad
So why do I feel so sad?
~Alicia Keys, Why Do I Feel So Sad?


~kbxshadow

]]> ~kbxshadow http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/25394533/ http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/25394533/ Thu, 18 Jun 2009 12:43:07 PDT
Speaking of which, I feel like I really want a new title for that fic. :/ It sounds lame right now and I can't seem to find a good title that'll capture the essence of the whole fic. I need something that encompasses the focus of the story: it's a Kingdom Hearts and Super Smash Brothers crossover. I need a title that'll capture that, but I can't seem to find a good title.

If I can't think of something soon, I might make this a mini-contest to see if any of you can think of a good title. The winner will get a oneshot or something like that from Yours Truly.

So that's my update for now on TSBW.

Next. Animes that I've been watching as of late. First is a quick opinion on One Piece. Look. I've been watching and reading One Piece for...seven or eight years now, and I'll tell you right now that it is impossible for me to ever tire of the series. But geez, lately, I watch (or read) One Piece and I'm stressing out!! That's not good!! But please don't blame me for that one, because if you've gotten to the point where I'm at right now, you'd understand. I won't say out loud what's going on, because I know a couple of people who wouldn't want me to spoil anything, but GOSH DAMMIT!!! I'm MAD!!! One Piece is seriously like Dragon Ball in this sense because they have to draw out EVERY SINGLE LITTLE DETAIL (especially because the plot's starting to get A LOT thicker) and thus make things a whole lot more suspenseful and agitating and just plain...GAAAAH.

So that's my rant on One Piece for now until I get around to seeing more episodes.

The next anime I've been watching has been BAD ASS. I kid you not. Guin Saga. I think it's based off of a critically acclaimed book or something like that, but basically, it's...so cool that I can't quite summarize it right now. But it's an AWESOME series so far, and if you get the chance to see it, I highly recommend it, especially if you're a fan of the action/adventure genre like me.

And those are my anime rants for now.

Here's a quiz I stole off of

What color/kind of socks are you wearing?
[ ] Red = loud
[ ] Green = stupid
[x] None = freaky
[ ] Fuzzy = gorgeous
[ ] Yellow = innocent
[ ] Purple = a little too happy
[ ] Black = emo
[ ] Stripes = funny
[ ] Gray = skanky
[ ] Pink = preppy
[ ] Light blue = sweaty
[ ] Other = hot
[ ] White = sexy

What kind of pants are you wearing?
[ ]Shorts = cutie
[ ]Skirt/skort = skank
[ ]Corduroy = faggot homosexual
[ ]Skinny jeans = scene kid
[ ]Ripped jeans = emo
[ ]Cammo = cage fighter
[ ]Jeans = prep
[x]Pajamas = pimp
[ ]Cargo = clown
[ ]Sweats = athlete
[ ]Boxers = brat
[ ]Booty shorts = female
[ ]Capris = Gangster
[ ]Nothing = hoe
[ ]Dickies = weirdo
[ ]Bikini bottoms = tiki girl
[ ]Other = sex addict

What is your natural hair color?
[ ]Auburn = that every one wants to make out with
[ ]Blonde = with a broken heart
[ ]Black = with a sexy smile
[x]Dark brown = with a hot boyfriend/girlfriend
[ ]Red = that likes to have fun
[ ]Brown = who loves to be different
[ ]Dirty blonde= with sexy eyes
[ ]Bald = with herpes
[ ]Other = with a nice ass

Pick the month you were born on:
[ ]1 = who ate
[ ]2 = who needed
[x]3 = who killed
[ ]4 = who shot
[ ]5 = who killed
[ ]6 = who smoked with
[ ]7 = who banged
[ ]8 = who ran shirtless with
[ ]9 = who got stabbed horribly by
[ ]10 = who cuddled with
[ ]11 = who slept with
[ ]12 = who ran naked with

Pick the day you were born on:
[ ]01 = the kool-aid man
[ ]02 = a dog
[ ]03 = a shoe
[ ]04 = a toothbrush
[ ]05 = Santa Claus
[ ]06 = The Trojan man
[ ]07 = two horny bi girls
[ ]08 = a prostitute
[ ]09 = a porn star
[ ]10 = a bag of weed
[ ]11 = a lover
[ ]12 = a glass of milk
[ ]13 = a horse
[ ]14 = a lesbian
[ ]15 = a stripper
[ ]16 = a pickle
[ ]17 = a jew
[ ]18 = a person
[ ]19 = an orange
[ ]20 = a dildo
[ ]21 = Chuck Norris
[ ]22 = a whore
[ ]23 = my crush
[ ]24 = an easter egg
[ ]25 = a jar of honey
[ ]26 = a condom
[ ]27 = a bowl of cereal
[ ]28 = a french fry
[ ]29 = your dealer
[x]30 = Paris Hilton
[ ]31 = your... ]]> ~kbxshadow http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/25298468/ http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/25298468/ Sat, 13 Jun 2009 20:56:22 PDT

How did I do this year? Well...You can assess that yourself:

Art 1: 98.27%, A+
English III Honors: 93.17%, A
US History: 96.51%, A
AP Statistics: 90.08%, A-
ROTC: 88.79%, B+
AP Chemistry: 73.30%, C+
Band: 94.47%, A

Total GPA: At least 3.8, not sure yet.

This year almost killed me, guys. Really, truly, and honestly. If I had gotten to that point of depression, my fics may never have been updated ever again. Hey, I have enough Vicadin stowed away somewhere, and I know where that somewhere is.

But kudos to all of my friends out there. You guys really helped me to survive this year.

But I really wish that grade in ROTC could have been rounded up. D: It sucks that I'm not the most physically active person in world, and it doesn't help that my ankle will never have the same traction again. Most of that grade in ROTC was physical testing. It made me want to cry a lot. Chem, I just don't care about. That was the class that would have made me commit suicide. Curse it.

But with that off to the side, summer vacation is off to a good start. I've started my summer homework. I got my room all nice and clean and vacuumed. I have good music going. I get up in the morning and exercise a little so I'm not a total flab for drum major camp or marching band camp later in the vacation. I'm doing a lot of writing right now, too. There should be an update sometime this week. Surprise, surprise.

But yeah, morning exercises. Those help me to wake up a little. Let's see...
-- 5 sets of 20 crunches, plus an extra 5
-- 5 sets of 10 right-angle push-ups
-- 3 sets of ab stabilizers: 45 sec, 30 sec, 30 sec

I just hope that I don't eat too much. D; Probably not, because I sleep late enough that I usually don't get breakfast. 'Sides, I plan on adding some wooden sword swinging to the roster. If anyone has any ideas I can add to this exercise stuff, let me know. I'll see if I can get over my laziness to do it.

So one of my main goals over the summer is to lose weight.

Not.

It's to try to finish at least half of TSBW. We'll see how far I get. If not TSBW, then at least Light's Blood. That one's short enough that if I put my mind to it, I can get it done over the summer. :/

Well, we'll see what happens, so see you later!

~~+++===+++===+++~~



~~+++===+++===+++~~

I want to be where the sun was the sky
When it's time for siesta you could watch them go by
Beautiful faces no cares in this world
Where a girl loves a boy and a boy
...Loves a girl.
~Madonna, La Isla Bonita


~kbxshadow

]]> ~kbxshadow http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/25066990/ http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/25066990/ Mon, 01 Jun 2009 10:06:53 PDT
Oh yeah, kbx is hailing from her Statistics class again. We're starting to get down to finals and final projects and all, and I already finished my final project presentation, so I'm free to do as I please on the Web. Yay Firefox. And luckily devART wasn't blocked off. This is good.

So, yeah, sorry I wasn't around on the weekend. I've been places. Community service, community service project (which pretty much took ALL OF Saturday from me), shopping for an ROTC party on Sunday, watching my sister, and playing Dawn of the New World. Again. Especially now that I've figured out how to switch between characters other than Emil (though I must say that I've gotten to be really good with Emil/Ratatosk ;D Whoo spoiler), I'm just switching between characters like crazy. I'm still no good with the mages since I like to be in the middle of the mess, but at least I know I'm good with the pure battlers and the half and halfs. You know, some magic, some hand-to-hand. That's why I'm pretty okay with Richter and Marta.

Richter's a bit slow, but I still like him. In my opinion, he's one of the best characters in Dawn of the New World. And you shouldn't ask about my ultimate favorite character in that game, because it's Ratatosk. Oops, I told you. Haha. But yeah. The antihero. Ratatosk. Not only is his name freakin' awesome, but he's like a terminally angry adolescent. He's great. I almost want to see a scene where they sit Ratatosk down with a psychiatrist.

I think the ending result would be a horrible fatality...Maybe an incredibly gory scene with lotsa fire. Because Ratatosk is just awesome like that. Terminally angry adolescent.

This week's actually looking a bit busy too, but I'll still be checking my messages when I get the chance to. So I'm not dead. Kinda.

What I do know is that I'm excited for this Saturday. would know why. But it's a secret until then. Sssshh...

Well, I need to get going, so see you later.

~~+++===+++===+++~~



~~+++===+++===+++~~


~kbxshadow

]]> ~kbxshadow http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/24968455/ http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/24968455/ Tue, 26 May 2009 19:40:11 PDT [link]

So, on top of my already-frustrating state of affairs, I found something else to make me feel a little more sadistic. It's weird - I literally have all of these toxic personalities somewhere in me. I've noticed it over and over again, but there's too much poison to really get it to stop affecting people. I sigh.

Yeah...I'm kinda PMS-ing too, so that might be the other reason why I feel so "F my life" about everything right now. And so sadistic. I think I can make fire freeze with my current level of sadism, so...Sorry, Shining Riku and SuperSmasher025. I would love to talk to you guys, but I'm really feeling overly sadistic...I need a day or two to calm down and find myself again, else I'll end up inadvertently hurting you two. It's the last thing I want to do.

I'm supposed to be writing a William Faulkner-style sentence for this "I-Too-Can-Write-Like-Faulkner Contest". It would be cool if I could win it, 'cause I actually like the sentence I've written so far. Then I also need to read The Catcher in the Rye quite soon or else I'm effed.

After that I'm going to go make myself cry by watching Grave of the Fireflies. They say crying over something like that is supposed to be a good stress-reliever. So I'm going to go bawl my eyes out and hope I get over this extreme spell of sadism. :/

But yeah, that's all I've got for now. See you soon.

~~+++===+++===+++~~



~~+++===+++===+++~~


~kbxshadow

]]> ~kbxshadow http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/24915161/ http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/24915161/ Sat, 23 May 2009 21:47:45 PDT
And there's a LOT of cosplayers this year, let me tell you that. A whole bunch of One Piece characters, a number of Kingdom Hearts characters (of course), Watchmen, Silent Hill, Left for Dead, Metal Gear Solid, Legend of Zelda (duh), Ouran Host Club (apparently there were 5 million Honey-senpais this morning; I'm glad I wasn't there), Mario (there were Godfather gangster versions of Mario and Luigi), Bleach...

The list can go on.

I'm surprised I didn't see any Edward Cullens or Bellas around. Probably good too, I think there would have been mass amounts of acid and shotguns involved. We'll see.

I did see Sweeney Todd, though, that was cool.

No Ikes, yet, but I did see three different Marths. :3 I had to leave 'em alone, though. msxsonic was ready to shank all of them. :/

I'm not going to go on for long, my finger's still pretty bruised for me to be typing for long.

But I will say that I know what characters to cosplay as if I had the resources to:

1. Sheva (Resident Evil 5) - 'Cause Sheva's a badass sidekick who's a demon with a sniper rifle. 8D Plus she's got my kind of body type (kinda) so Sheva would be the easiest for me to cosplay as.

2. Soren (Fire Emblem 9 and 10) - Soren's my male counterpart, pretty much. Kinda like my "Seth" from Vengeance of Purity. Sarcastic, cold, objective, and a real motherf***er if you get him PO'd. Plus he's awesome.

3. Lucia (Fire Emblem 9 and 10) - But only when I'm with , who I would persuade to be Elincia. ;D I think this is also me trying to flaunt my bangs as well, but generally speaking, Lucia's another of my favorite characters.

Yes, that's right, kbxshadow's brought her sexiness back - my hair's been relaxed and straightened again, layered, cut, and now I have BANGS. They get in the way, but I still like them. It's been my dream to have bangs since I was a little kid, but I could NEVER get them because I had super curly hair. Now that my hair's relaxed and straightened, though, I can have bangs, and I now I have bangs.

Allow me to be a narcissist, but I look really hot with my newly styled hair. I love it. It's really soft and shiny too. =3

Well, I'm off. See you around!

~~+++===+++===+++~~



~~+++===+++===+++~~
I really wanna tell you something
This is just the way I am
I really wanna tell you something
But I can't
You make me want to be a man
Arguments that have no meaning
This is just the way I am
You really wanna tell me something
But you can't
You make me want to be a man
~Utada Hikaru, You Make Me Want To Be A Man


~kbxshadow

]]> ~kbxshadow http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/24863288/ http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/24863288/ Wed, 20 May 2009 19:28:17 PDT
Problem: I don't know what to talk about.

Oh, I finished Majora's Mask again. That was fun. Especially 'cause I got all of the masks...meaning I also got the Fierce Deity's Mask. Haaaah~. I love that mask. If Nintendo plans on remaking Majora's Mask so that it has the awesome graphics of Twilight Princess, then I'm a happy kbxshadow. Honestly. I would LOVE to see that. I'm pretty sure the transformation sequences would be pretty gnarly. Yes. I said gnarly.

I mean, come on. Have you seen those cutscenes when Link puts on the Deku, Zora, Goron, or Fierce Deity's Mask? The sequences are so...creepy, as it is. With Twilight Princess graphics? I think I'd be crying in bed.

Um, so that's my Majora's Mask excursion. And no, I have yet to finish Ocarina of Time. I really do think that it's one of those games that'll hold on to my attention for a whole day, then when I turn it off, I don't want to play it anymore until like, a few months later.

Hahaha, were you alarmed by the title? Got you.

It's a book by William Faulkner. He's officially one of my favorite writers now. I mean, I'm a person for the sort of dark, insidious humor Faulkner puts into his books. It takes a little getting used to, like Shakespeare, but once you can understand what's going on, Faulkner's a great read.

Uh...I'm a very busy kbxshadow this weekend, though. -_- I haven't done ANY sort of writing in a really long time, and it's making me sad. I really hope I can get somewhat close to finishing TSBW before the summer's out. At this rate, though, that doesn't look like a probable dream. We'll see what happens. Maybe I'll go ahead and continue work on the next chapter. It's in progress, folks, it really is. School's really been kicking me in the butt, even though AP Exams are over. @.@

I really need to start keeping a planner or something like that. :/

Oh! I got a Jirachi!! I'm so happy. I had to give up my Lugia for it, but I have Gale of Darkness, so it's all good. I have a Jirachi now. I'm hoping I can at least have Deoxys in my Pokédex - not for keeps - before the school year ends. I'll see what happens, but for now...I has a Jirachi~!

Hmm...I've nothing else to ramble on about for now, and I don't really have anything to rant about, so I'll leave this journal alone now. See you around.

~~+++===+++===+++~~



~~+++===+++===+++~~
I send to you my silent prayer
Before I sleep at night
I send to you my silent prayer
Baby so you'll be alright

Every morning I think of you
I just can't shake off my dreams...no, no
I read the paper and watch the news
I don't know what it means

When you do what you've got to do
You must know that I'm there with you
Every breath that I take...I hope and I pray
Sweet baby...baby be ok
~Shanice Wilson, feat. Johnny Gill, Silent Prayer


~kbxshadow

]]> ~kbxshadow http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/24624626/ http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/24624626/ Wed, 06 May 2009 19:36:45 PDT
A demo of a game in development, people. If you like Super Smash Brothers and want to see an actual storyline involving them, then I encourage you to try this demo out! In order to make this as cool as possible, we need your reviews and feedback! Please! The file itself is 71.18 MB, and download should only take 3 to 10 minutes. When you play, make sure to extract the complete file by right-clicking on your icon leading to the file and selecting "Extract All"!

And a few cautions! This is only a demo so not everything is complete! Pit, Ephraim, and Ganondorf do not have any character sets as of yet, so don't panic when switching characters in battle! And Pit as of now still has no skills, so it may be best to keep him out! Lyn also does not have a complete set of skills, but she does have her "Overlimit" skill! Have fun, and please, please, PLEASE send me some reviews! Thanks, everyone!

Also, note that WE DON'T OWN ANY ELEMENTS OF THIS GAME except for a few characters and the concept of the game itself. ALL NINTENDO, SQUARE ENIX, AND ANY OTHER COMPANY REPRESENTED IN THIS GAME ALL SOLELY BELONG TO NINTENDO, SQUARE ENIX, AND ANY OTHER COMPANY RESPECTIVELY.

Well, have fun guys! And send in some reviews; we need those!

[link]

The website where you can download the game.

EDIT: Apparently, you need to have the RGSS Player downloaded in order to play the game. Follow the link below and first download the file. After downloading the file, open it and open RTP_Standard_102 and download it. Huzzah, you can play the demo now.

[link]

~~+++===+++===+++~~



~~+++===+++===+++~~

This 10% luck,
20% skill,
15% concentrated power and will,
5% pleasure,
50% pain,
And a 100% reason to remember the name...
~Fort Minor, Remember the Name


~kbxshadow

]]> ~kbxshadow http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/24598162/ http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/24598162/ Tue, 05 May 2009 09:12:07 PDT
If anything, my stomach hurts, but that's because of something else.

Shining Riku on fanfiction.net has got a demo of his game underway. I'm actually really surprised at how much has been developed already. At this rate, I daresay we'll be finished with the Supremacy part of his game series by the end of the summer. That's cool. It gives me something else to do over the summer.

Speaking of which, I think I'm going to be pretty busy over the summer. But don't I say that every year but it turns out I'm really not doing much of anything? I start to think so sometimes.

Well, let's see. College tours, drum major camp (if I'm elected drum major next year), AP English homework, AP Gov homework, AP Calc homework (I think), various other places Dad's no doubt going to drag us to, band camp at the end of the summer, a job, and now Shining Riku's game.

...Yeah, I'ma be busy over the summer. :/ What a way to spend a summer vacation.

Which I can't wait for. I really can't wait to just flop down and go to sleep. I'm so tired, people, it's really not funny. And the fact I'm so tired could possibly be contributing to this sense of paranoia I've been developing over these years of my life. I dunno. I'm scared - terrified - of something in my past and I can't remember; because I can't remember, now I'm paranoid. Feelin' threatened by something from the past, know what I mean?

I guess not. Actually, I'm not even sure if those feelings are real or not because of the fact that I've gotten to be so paranoid. This is so much easier to write than to say. I've always been lacking in words to express myself.

It's a paradoxical thing, really. I feel like crying a lot because I'm so scared of something, and because I don't know what it is, I now feel paranoid and I don't know how to shake it. At the same time, I'm not even sure if that feeling's a false feeling or not - I keep thinking this is just me pitying myself and being selfish. It's really weird, y'know?

Don't mind me rambling. Time for something happier.

Umm....

The year's almost out. That's a happy thing. 'Cause I'm tired of this year. I really am. AP Chem's kicking my ass, to tell the truth, and that's really because it's difficult to study when you have no clue what the concept's even trying to say. Doesn't really help that the teacher doesn't really thoroughly explain the concept before trying to give us these really difficult questions and telling us to solve them. WTF, y'know?

Oooh, something happier. I've been surfing Youtube (yes blasphemy on my part) and I found a couple of rather hilarious people. Already bookmark'd them. Haha. First there's nigahiga - if you don't know the guy, I'm not sure what to tell you except go find him and watch "How to be Ninja". My sister - who's not so easily amused - was rolling on the floor laughing. Yes, so much that I had to spell it out. They're coming out with a DVD on July 24 of this year. We're gettin' their DVD. I'm excited.

And then there's boffyrox. Good gosh, not only are his walkthroughs amazing (especially his Resident Evil walkthroughs) but the commentary he adds to the walkthroughs are really freaking funny. Especially when he gets frustrated and blows his fuse. It's hilarious. You wanna see boffy really frustrated? Go take a look at his I Wanna Be The Guy walkthrough. THAT was the funniest I've seen.

boffyrox and nigahiga. Find them. Now. Especially if you like zombie shooting games or Asian stupid humor.

Well that's all I've got for now. See you later.

~~+++===+++===+++~~



~~+++===+++===+++~~

I wanna run away
Never say good bye
I wanna know the truth
Instead of wondering why
I wanna know the answers
No more lies
I wanna shut the door
And open up my mind...
~Linkin Park, Runaway

http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/24555514/ Sat, 02 May 2009 21:00:21 PDT

Took my SAT today...Not that bad, I suppose, but I have never been as hungry as I was when I got out. That was my only problem. I was struggling through the last couple sections because I was starving. Almost literally. Thinking burns a lot of those calories, you know.

At any rate, Shining Riku on fanfiction.net seems to have oiled his creativity gears: from what I've seen, the fellow's on fire with his ideas for his game and fic! Talk about multitasking! I've never been able to multitask, as you can see, so I'm easily impressed by that. So far, discussions are going great and ideas are bouncing around like rabbits on speed. This should be good.

Umm...Let's see, I don't have anything else to talk about, so I've an element quiz to put up now!

-=:Element Quiz:=-

.:FIRE:.

[x] You have a short temper.
[x] You often act on your emotions without thinking first.
[ ] You are very competitive.
[ ] You like to play with fire.
[x] You are not a strong swimmer or you can't swim at all.
[x] You prefer warm weather over cold weather.
[x] You often lose control over yourself.
[x] You can be quite reckless.
[x] You sometimes hurt people without realizing it.
[x] People have often called you insane.
Total: 8

.:WATER:.

[x] You have a calm, laid-back personality.
[x] You like to go to the beach.
[ ] You rarely get angry.
[x] When you do get angry, you know how to control it.
[ ] You think before you act.
[ ] You are good at breaking up fights.
[ ] You are a good swimmer.
[x] You like the rain.
[ ] You can stay calm in stressful situations.
[ ]You are very generous.
Total: 4

.:EARTH:.

[x] You are physically strong.
[x] You have a close connection with nature.
[ ] You don't mind getting dirty.
[x] You form strong opinions on issues that concern you.
[ ] You could easily survive in the wild.
[x] You care about the environment.
[x] You can easily focus on your work without getting distracted.
[ ] You rarely get depressed.
[ ] You aren't afraid of anything.
[ ] You prefer to have a strict set of rules.
Total: 5

.:AIR:.

[ ] You have a free spirit.
[ ] You hate rules.
[x] You prefer to be out in the open rather than in small, enclosed spaces.
[ ] You hate to be restrained.
[x] You are very independent and outgoing.
[x] You are quite intelligent.
[ ] You tend to be impatient.
[ ] You are easily distracted.
[x] You can sometimes be hyperactive and/or annoying.
[ ] You wish you could fly.
Total: 4

.: DARKNESS:.

[x] You spend most of your time alone.
[x] You prefer nighttime over daytime.
[ ] You like creepy things.
[x] You like to play tricks on people.
[x] Black is your favorite color.
[x] You prefer the villains over the heroes in movies, TV shows, videogames, etc.
[x] You don't talk much.
[x] You are atheist.
[ ] You don't mind watching scary movies.
[x] You love to break the rules.
Total: 8

.:LIGHT:.

[ ] You are very polite.
[x] You are spiritual.
[x] When someone is in trouble, you never hesitate to help them.
[ ] You believe everything you see or hear.
[ ] You are afraid of the dark.
[ ] You hate violence.
[x] You hope for world peace.
[ ] You are generally a happy person.
[ ] Everyone loves to be around you. (Seriously, how do I judge this?)
[ ] You always follow the rules.
Total: 3

Ha! Who called it? Fire and Darkness!

Yeah, I really like these elemental things. Because, as you know, elements are just incarnations of the universal loop of energy.

Well, I'm off for now! Kbx over and out!

~~+++===+++===+++~~



~~+++===+++===+++~~

My love
Do you ever dream of
Candy coated raindrops?
You're the same
My candy rain...
~Soul for Real, Candy Rain


~kbxshadow

]]> ~kbxshadow http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/24505535/ http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/24505535/ Wed, 29 Apr 2009 21:25:00 PDT
At least it's only for two days.

My sister's watching Over the Hedge again. It's a pretty good movie, I guess, it's just that the concept of family that's always in it makes me a little bitter. How immature of me.

You know what I realized, though? When I get stressed, my heart rate goes at this fever pitch rate. It's pretty frightening, really, 'cause under any kind of stress - whether it be anger, depression, pressure, anything - I feel like my heart's wrenching up into a twisted little ball. It feels terrible.

I've been surfing a little on Youtube lately. Pretty cool when you find something that's really helpful and/or funny, right? That Resident Evil 5 walkthrough I was talking about is one of those. The fellow who's playing it makes it really funny and cool to watch, so while I'd never put my hands on a Resident Evil game, I could sit there and watch his walkthroughs. Good ol' boffyrox.

And then there's nigahiga, who's made a movie with his friend. Hilarious. You know, How to be Ninja, How to be Gangster. Hilarious stuff. The funny thing is, his last name's an Okinawan name. That made my day, since we Okinawans tend to be pretty funny when we do or don't want to.

Well, that's all I got for now, so I'll see you soon.

~kbxshadow

~~+++===+++===+++~~



]]> ~kbxshadow http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/24448322/ http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/24448322/ Sun, 26 Apr 2009 15:19:10 PDT really weird meme to do, so I'll do that too.

Anywho. Contrary to popular belief, I've actually been drawing as well as writing. Problem is, I'm tired of my scanner killing the pictures and I'm too lazy to go and fix the scanned pictures. So I just draw and think of Artist's Comments that I would put if I had the motivation to.

For instance, I just recently drew myself as an Ouran High School Host Club member. The drawing turned out pretty nice, and the comments I was going to put for that particular drawing was just "I think I'm host club material." Plus their uniforms are beautiful. I want a uniform like that.

Then just yesterday, I drew myself in a tuxedo. Well, maybe it's slightly different, but it was a tuxedo nevertheless. Oh yeah, I kinda sorta looked like a guy too, so that it worked out. Turned out pretty nice too, since I'm getting the hang of blending colored pencils. At any rate, while the tan was a bit too dark for my purposes, it was a nice tropical tan that I would like, and the hair color turned out just beautifully. So my comments for that particular picture, if I were motivated to post it on this website, was "In the event that I find myself in a happy, monogamous lesbian relationship, I get the tux. Because tuxes are cool."

And then I also drew a picture of my Ghost Xweetok on Neopets. Her actual name's BlackNight184, but I gave her a passable name: "Noctum". Creative, yes. But that one's pretty nice too.

And the graffiti project we have to do in Art is turning out superbly. It'll be a pain in the ass to color it, but if I can get a snapshot of it and put in on here, I might do it. We'll see.

Okay, so for the weird meme. They call it...

The Sex Meme

1. Is there anyone on your friends list you would ever consider having sex with?
-- I won't lie; I think I've started to lose the "pin straight" stuff, and I'm unfortunately easily excitable. So, yes, there is someone on my friends list I would consider a tender moment with.

2. Sex in the morning, afternoon or night?
-- Night. In the darkness, it's more sensual, I'd think.

3. What side of the bed do you sleep on?
-- Anywhere, really. But I'm usually in the center of my bed when I wake up. xD

4. Do you masturbate?
-- What a prying question...Lose the image of Innocent Kbxshadow, 'cause I do unfortunately masturbate.

5. How often? Lately?
-- Three times a week, usually? I dunno. Lately, not so much. Last time was a few weeks ago. ><

6. Have you ever taken your clothes off for money?
-- ...That's disgusting.

7. Do you prefer showers or baths?
-- Showers.

8. Have you ever had sex in the shower or the bath?
-- No, I'm a virgin, but neither really appeal to me. It'll get cold.

9. Do you watch/read pornography?
-- No. I'd much rather fantasize instead of watching/reading other people's disgusting habits...

10. Do you want someone aggressive or passive in bed?
-- Passive, because my main thing is cuddling...

11. Do you love someone on your friends list?
-- Isn't this like the first question? Well...I guess I do. Bad Kbxshadow. *shoots self*

12. Do you know all the people on your friends list?
-- Half of 'em I do, and half of 'em are only online peeps.

13. Would you choose love or money?
-- "You see you need somebody who's there like a gentleman, if anybody can fit the description baby, I can, someone who cares and dares to give himself completely, you got it in me, you need a man with sensitivity." ~ Ralph Tresvant, Sensitivity. I prefer love over money. Not like as if you can take money with you when you die, right?

14. Your top three favorite kinks in bed?
-- I think for me, it's all about the senses. So...
Sensual kissing, anywhere.
Touching...
Basically, cuddling.
Except, I'm the one who works the magic. ><

15. Has anyone ever gone beyond your personal line of respect sexually?
-- I don't think so? I'm not even sure what this question's asking.

16. Where is the most romantic place you have had sex?
-- Despite my answers, I'm a virgin. So I can't answer this.

17. Where is the weirdest place you have had sex?
-- I shun this question because I'm a virgin.

18. Hav... ]]> ~kbxshadow http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/24289824/ http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/24289824/ Fri, 17 Apr 2009 11:48:46 PDT
Fun fun Wind Temple.

Actually, I never really have been fond of the Wind Temple. In fact, I think I like the Earth Temple more than the Wind Temple. Just because you get to shoot rays of light at mirrors and paralyze a whole bunch of ReDeads.

I don't really mind the ReDeads in Windwaker or Twilight Princess. I think the ones in Ocarina of Time and Majora's Mask are the scarier ones. Gosh, if I can find a way to get around them, then I'm looking for it. If I want Link to be raped by an undead thing, I'd rather it be cartoony like in Windwaker. Or get smashed with a giant claymore thing that really hurts, like in Twilight Princess.

Hehe. I'm in this total Legend of Zelda faze and it must be sad. Well, then again, I've been thinking a whole bunch of conceptual stuff for Light's Blood, especially the background stuff for the Fierce Deity. I'm really excited about that part. Mainly because I'll be using stuff from the sidestory in the Majora's Mask manga. Plus, it makes sense to me. Hahaha.

Meaning yes, the Fierce Deity from Majora's Mask will be in Light's Blood. In fact, he was the main reason why I even wanted to write the fic in the first place. -___-; I just can't seem to find a suitable name for him for his human form (which I'm assuming is the Traveler in the sidestory).

Ah...If I could just continue writing the fic, I think it'll be good.

And speaking of Light's Blood, we have an interview. Now with Reeon.

1. You must choose only ONE of your OCs. Do it again if you wanna use another OC.
2. Your OC must answer every question as truthfully as possible.
3. Title the journal as "OCs Quiz (your OCs name.Example:Kaiser's Quiz)".
4. When you're done, tag as many people as you want. Allow as many people to kidnap as you wish.
5. Have fun!!!

1. Hi! What's your real name and nickname?

Reeon: Just "Reeon", folks. Nothing special.

2. Interesting... what's your current age?

Reeon: Same age as Link, maybe a couple of months younger. So that'd make me, what, nineteen in Light's Blood?

3. Uh huh. What's your favourite food?

Reeon: I don't know if it's my Snowpeak upbringing or what, but for some reason, I really really like soups and stews. Any kind as long as it's good.

4. And your favourite drink?

Reeon: Well, there's a reason why I order an ale every time I stop by Telma's bar.

5. Confession time! Who's your crush/lover?

Reeon: Have you been living under a rock or what? How much more obvious can it get that I love Kevyn to pieces? I mean, come on! Can you blame me? She's this charismatic gal, daring, adventurous, energetic, and sexy all at the same time! Goddesses, I love her too much sometimes!

6. Aww! Have you two kissed yet?

Reeon: Of course! It's how we first met, you know. She was swimming with her sister down in Lake Hylia. Holy. I can't find words to tell you just how absolutely beautiful she was as she came up from the water...All that pretty silver hair hugging her...Her clothes all stuck to her...I just had to, you know?

7. Classic question! What's your favourite colour?

Reeon: Probably white. 'Cause it's the color of snow.

8. Who's your favourite author?

Reeon: Look, I don't read for fun. Honestly, I hate reading. I only learned how to read so I wouldn't be mistaken for an unintelligent numbskull.

9. Now what's your biggest fear?

Reeon: I don't care what the fuck people call them: spiders, Skulltulas, Walltulas, Pygmies, Gohmas, what-the-fuck-ever, but I am deathly afraid of spiders and their kind. Shit.

10. *stifles a giggle* I'm not laughing *bursts out laughing*

Reeon: Hey, go on, keep laughing, but you weren't the one who, at three years old, was dragged kicking and screamin into the web of a Skulltula family for dinner.

11. Awesome. Who's your hero?

Reeon: Probably my dad. Pops was the one who got me out of that mess in time, anyway, plus I learn a lot from him.

12. Ok, who is your worst enemy?

Reeon: Jessie's got a grude against me, but I don't blame her. And I don't hate Link either, since it's kind of hard to not fall in love with Kevyn. So I don't really know anyone I'd consider an enemy. But anything with two body segments, eight eyes, eight legs, and an obv... ]]> ~kbxshadow http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/24265076/ http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/24265076/ Wed, 15 Apr 2009 21:23:45 PDT < But I still drank it and froze my butt off. It was all good.

Oh yeah, I haven't made any progress in the Shadow Temple since last journal. Reading Silent Hill demo reviews, watching a Resident Evil 5 walkthrough on Youtube, and thinking about the Shadow Temple had me worked up into a nightmare frenzy. But luckily, I didn't have any nightmares. Rather, I don't even remember what I dreamed. So it's all good. xD

My sister decided she'd make me play Windwaker because I didn't feel like playing Twilight Princess or Ocarina of Time. Gasp, yes, I actually didn't want to play Twilight Princess for once. Don't get me wrong; I love the artwork and designs and everything (especially re-designed Link ) but it's so easy, know what I mean? Actually, nowadays, when I play Twilight Princess, it's to help me coordinate stuff in Light's Blood. Because it's set after the events of Twilight Princess, there's a few things that I have to look over and redo, especially the things that are accessible only in Wolf Form. It's really messing me up, to say in the least.

And speaking of Twilight Princess, actually, here's the next quiz. We're now interviewing Jessie, Kevyn's younger sister. Oh yeah, and these answers are given to you from Jessie's creator: my own sister msxsonic. Whee, you get a glimpse into the imagination of my own sister. Fear it.

1. You must choose only ONE of your OCs. Do it again if you wanna use another OC.
2. Your OC must answer every question as truthfully as possible.
3. Title the journal as "OCs Quiz (your OCs name.Example:Kaiser's Quiz)". My title's decent enough
4. When you're done, tag as many people as you want. Allow as many people to kidnap as you wish.
5. Have fun!!!

1. Hi! What's your real name and nickname?

Jessie: It's Jessie. People call me "Jess", but I hate that nickname. Especially when Reeon calls me that. Goddesses, I hate Reeon. >< Oh, and the police-people-type call me "The Scarlet Reynard". I like that name. Yeah, I like that one better than "Jess". Yuck.

2. Interesting... what's your current age?

Jessie: I'm two years younger than Sis! So that makes me...sixteen. 8D

3. Uh huh. What's your favourite food?

Jessie: 8D Sweets! Oh my gosh, I love sweets! Candies, pastries, cakes, tarts, scones, anything! Especially if they're homemade!!

4. And your favourite drink?

Jessie: Milk! Cow milk, not that disgusting Ordon goat milk stuff! It's thanks to milk that I'm actually a little bit taller than Kev...

5. Confession time! Who's your crush/lover?

Jessie: Eh, no one. Kevyn's the one who's having love life issues. But if I do get the chance to beat the living shit out of Reeon, then I'm a happy Jessie.

6. Aww! Have you two kissed yet?

Jessie: EWWWWWW~!!!! Why the HELL would I kiss Reeon?! That's DISGUSTING!! I'd much rather kiss a BRICK before Reeon! Ugh!!

7. Classic question! What's your favourite colour?

Jessie: Gold! Treasure! Silver! Treasure! 8D Like Sis!

8. Who's your favourite author?

Jessie: ...Do the Ancient Sages and dead people who wrote history count?

9. Now what's your biggest fear?

Jessie: Ugly dead things...*shudder* ReDeads...Poes...Stalfoses...Yeah...Oh, and losing Kev...I don't wanna think about life without Sis.

10. *stifles a giggle* I'm not laughing *bursts out laughing*

Jessie: Yeah you are.

11. Awesome. Who's your hero?

Jessie: Sis! 'Nuff said!

12. Ok, who is your worst enemy?

Jessie: *charges up a huge fireball* Oh Reeon~...Where are you~? I've a wonderful surprise for you~!

13. What would you do if your hero and your worst enemy got together?

Jessie: You mean "got back together"? They're exes, you know that, right? If they ever got back together, I'd first murder Reeon, then I'd knock Sis upside the head until she got that she can't be with him!!

14. Interesting... what would you do if you met your creator?

Jessie: 8D Ask for an autograph~!

15. Okay, I'll contact them right now. Done! Now, what do you want to be when you grow up?

Jessi... ]]> ~kbxshadow http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/24236707/ http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/24236707/ Tue, 14 Apr 2009 10:52:32 PDT
I mean, come on, what the hell's up with that ugly-ass Deadhand thing? Shit, I was screaming the screen to make it fucking die because it was so ugly! "Die you fucking ugly-as-fuck THING!!!" I mean, defeating it's really really easy if you know what you're doing, but come on!! I wouldn't run from the thing because I'd be scared; I'd run away because it was frickin' FUGLY!!!

I don't really care if it's the frickin' Triforce of Courage that's doing it, but how does Link NOT shit in his pants the first time he sees those kinds of things?! And even worse, is YOUNG LINK who DOESN'T have the Triforce of Courage the very first time you run into a Deadhand in the Bottom of the Well!! How?! Come on, he'd run away from a frickin' Goron hug, but he doesn't even flinch when he sees a ReDead or that..that...that...THING!! THAT DEADHAND FUGLY THING!! Gibdos aren't that bad, but they're still DEAD THINGS. DEAD THINGS THAT COME BACK TO LIFE EVEN THOUGH THEY SHOULDN'T.

But...GAH, that fugly-ass Deadhand!! The first time was the worse for me 'cause it decided to flop down and die ON TOP OF THE FRICKIN' TREASURE CHEST. THE TREASURE CHEST. Come ON.

Whew...Thank goodness for the Sun's Song.

Actually, NO, 'cause the Sun's Song doesn't do SHIT to a Deadhand. Useless song!! You're supposed to stop all the dead things from attacking me!! "Deadhand"!!! Ring a bell?



And so that is my excursion in the Shadow Temple so far. I have yet to find the dungeon map.

And now, for a meme I ninja'd from

1. You must choose only ONE of your OCs. Do it again if you wanna use another OC. FIGHT THE POWER!
2. Your OC must answer every question as truthfully as possible.
3. Title the journal as "OCs Quiz (your OCs name.Example:Kaiser's Quiz)". My title's decent enough
4. When you're done, tag as many people as you want. Allow as many people to kidnap as you wish.
5. Have fun!!!

1. Hi! What's your real name and nickname?

Kevyn: The name's Kevyn for most of everyone! My friend's call me Kev, and the police-type people call me "The Silver Vixen". Sheesh. But I like it, so it's okay.

2. Interesting... what's your current age?

Kevyn: I'm...uh...Give me a moment, it's been a while since I thought on that...I'm eighteen in Light's Blood!

3. Uh huh. What's your favourite food?

Kevyn: I dunno, actually...I like food. Any kind of food. I can't really be a gourmet kind of person even if I wanted to because I don't have the time for those kinds of delicacies, but you know what? I like food. Especially anything homemade.

4. And your favourite drink?

Kevyn: I'm torn between strawberry cordial and pear cordial.

5. Confession time! Who's your crush/lover?

Kevyn: Well...there's these two guys in my life...One's an ex and I can't stand him sometimes because he can get to be really annoying, but he's still a sweetheart. He feels bad about what happened between me and him but he knows there's no way we can be together again because of what happened. He's still a pretty passionate fellow though, so maybe I might still have a tiny little bit of my heart set aside for him...And then there's the other guy I just met...He's...He's...I don't know...He's the guy, know what I mean? Perfect in every way, shape, and form, and while I never formally told him, he's really hot...My type. Wild yet calm, confident and strong...*goes on*

6. Aww! Have you two kissed yet?

Kevyn: Well, yeah, my ex, anyway. It was how we first met. The other guy? Um...No. I wouldn't want to put the poor fellow in an incriminating position, right? Although, he does look like a good kisser.

7. Classic question! What's your favourite colour?

Kevyn: Color...hmm...I'm actually torn between gold and silver. Because that's the color of treasure! 8D

8. Who's your favourite author?

Kevyn: Ummm...The Ancient Sages? I guess? I mean, I am an archaeologist of sorts, so I read and study the treasures I gather with my sister Jessie to recover Hyrule's ancient past... ]]> ~kbxshadow http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/24162203/ http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/24162203/ Fri, 10 Apr 2009 09:48:18 PDT
Oh yeah, I never told you how the blood drive went.

Yup, gave up a pint of my blood to figure out my blood type and save three lives. I wonder how statistically correct that is, but okay.

Problem: Red Cross couldn't find my vein so they decided to poke and prod around with the needle still in my arm until they felt my vein, and that was only by the smallest shred of luck that I had.

Results: A pretty bruise centered around my elbow joint that's slowly getting bigger.

Sub-results: I can't hold up my flute, so I'm probably going to end up not being able to march in the Easter parade tomorrow.

All in all, this really sucks. Even just flexing in general gets me cringing. That's bad. So Mom's recommended that I stay at home and rest my poor arm. I'll listen to her, because when it comes down to my health, she seems to know most.

Writing...Hm...I don't know about that yet. Hopefully I'll have some inspiration over the spring break I finally get next week. Whew.

But for now, I don't really have much to say. I just wanted that accomplishing fulfillment feeling of breaking the rules in Statistics. I never get to break rules, because I'm a good child.

Not, I'm really actually an evil despot plotting evil plots to conquer the world with said evil plots, and you people are my minions, which I successfully manipulate with my smooth talking. Hahaha. I'm sooo evil.

But you know what, there are people who say I'm not, and for once, I'm going to break this habit of denial and agree with them. I'm not evil, I'm not evil, I'm not evil...

'Kay, that didn't work, but you get what I mean.

I'm feeling generous today. A hug to you all.

~~+++===+++===+++~~



~~+++===+++===+++~~

~kbxshadow

]]> ~kbxshadow http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/24120119/ http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/24120119/ Tue, 07 Apr 2009 20:54:01 PDT
I mean, Stephen King is AMAZING. I love reading his books, and Duma Key was no different. I'm having a ball reading this book, but at the same time, I feel like crawling into a corner and crying. That fear, that sense of being sucked into the absolute terror, I want to write like that! I want to be able to write like that!

It was RED it was fucking RED.

I'm scared of the color red now...I get shivers and jitters at the mere mention of the color red. Looks like I won't be reading The Scarlet Letter for a while now, eh?

I...I don't know what to say.

where our sister

I'm terrified, guys, I don't want to go to sleep, but the book is just amazing. I can't stop reading it until the very end, and I'm almost done, I don't want to put the book down...I know I sound absolutely insane now, but this book, Duma Key, it's amazing, I can't believe I didn't finish it before, I'm so glad I bought it.

Perse. Like "Percy" but Perse. That's her name. The death-boat's name. Or death-goddess. I'm not entirely sure yet, I haven't finished the book yet, so I don't know. But Perse. I thought "Persephone" at first, but it's Perse. The death-goddess-ghost-ship that uses paintings to reach out and kill the people she doesn't like.

Perse, Perse, reach out for me! I will join your crew! Drown me, Perse, I will join your crew!

It's...It's a haunting thought...and almost welcoming. I would become one with the ocean and remain bound to it forever. I would join those drowned, bloated faces in the oceans just staring and staring and staring, beckoning you to join me, join me, join me.

But at the same time, it's terrifying...It could be just that I'm tired, it could be a lot of other things that's bringing me down, but this book is a relief and a fear. I want to crawl into a corner and cry, my world's starting to constrict into this tiny little pinhole, I'm scared, I'm terrified, but oh Perse, reach out for me, I've done enough damage to this world I love, shackle me to your ship, I will join your crew!

Everything I held dear to me, I try to take care of, but I'm dying guys, I'm dying. I can't fight anymore, I can't do anything except hurt you guys; I'm done fighting. Perse, reach out for me...I will join your death crew...

~~+++===+++===+++~~

Sienn is dying. There is too much blood. Seth only stares at the dead murderer and the dying Sienn. His heart feels heavy as he makes his resolve; he has one more stop to make. He turns away, the rain washing away the blood that had rained before.

Sienn grabs the bottom of Seth's pants. "Blood...is fucking red..." she coughs, blood caking her lips and sliding down her chin. "It's fucking...red...!"

"What about it?" Seth asked, unfazed.

"It's...ironic, isn't it? Blood...is fucking red...and her love...is fucking red...!"

Seth decides he can't grasp the meaning of Sienn's words. He kneels low to her.

"I...I can't...hold on...I'm...I'm trying...I'm trying to...hold on...My...My soul...is slipping...away...I can't...hold on...!"

"Why are you holding on?"

Sienn coughs more blood. Her eyes are starting to get that cloudy dead look. But her tears are ever alive. "...She's...She's my...I...I love her...I just...I just...want to see her again!!"

"You tried to get her to let go of you, and that's what she did."

"So...I was...I was selfish...as well...I..."

Seth puts two fingers to Sienn's lips. "You wanted her to be happy. You wanted her to care about something worthwhile, and your paranoia caused you to attempt to get her to hate your living guts. But in the end, all you wanted was the comfort of her words. You denied them in order to get more. You're despicable, Sienn."

Sienn nods in agreement.

"Are you scared of dying?"

"No...I'm actually...glad..." Her grip on Seth's pants weakens. "But...But I...I wish I could...see her...one more time...Just...one more time..."

The clouds steal over Sienn's eyes. Her hand falls away from Seth's pants.

Everything was fucking red.

~~+++===+++===+++~~

Can I say that I'm being badly influenced by this book?

Can I say that I'm absolutely terrified right now? Of everything?

Yes, yes, and yes.

I'm giving blood tomorrow.

It's going to be RED.

~~+++===+++===+++~~

http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/24056816/ Sat, 04 Apr 2009 11:30:30 PDT
I don't know, I just get to thinking maybe these writings are starting to get a little too personal. It's true I want to pursue a career in writing along with psychology, but my fiction turn out to be related to some aspect of me. And the problem I have with that is it's the same as if I were writing some version of Twilight or something like that.

I don't want to make my writing too personal, see?

Don't get me wrong, I'm not getting all depressed about it or anything. If writing as I normally do, basing my fictions off of my own experiences, thoughts, dreams, and ideals, is what makes my writing so good, then I'll keep doing it. I just don't want to make it so personal that people think reading and commenting on my stuff would be infringing on my privacy.

But maybe I need a change in style, know what I mean? So if anyone knows some way I can change my style (if you don't like it) then I'd appreciate it a lot if you'd tell me. Most of the thingies I put up here on deviantART are really pieces that I think people would enjoy and all, but seeing no comments gets me thinking that it's about time I changed my style of writing. I just don't know how.

Well, that's my shpiel. See you all later.

~~+++===+++===+++~~



~~+++===+++===+++~~

~kbxshadow

~~+++===+++===+++~~

Dare mo inai sekaie
Watashiwo tsurete itte...
Dare mo inai sekaie
Watashiwo tsurete itte...

~Nijiro no Basu by Utada Hikaru

]]> ~kbxshadow http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/23948295/ http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/23948295/ Sun, 29 Mar 2009 09:47:06 PDT His World. You know, Sonic's theme song in Sonic 2006. Zebrahead wins the best version award for this song, though.

So...for anyone who truly gives a flying crap, there's only one more day. Do I feel old.

I'm actually not entirely sure what to talk about.

Oh yeah, those updates I've been making. Three poems and a dark short story thing.

About that story, actually. Like I said in my comments, I've basically twisted up all of my spiritual beliefs and ideals to make that story. It was fun, to say in the least. And what's described in Chapter 2 is really an incredibly condensed version of what I've been taught so far. Sans deifications, that's pretty much my belief system. Now you know why I say I'm atheist/agnostic.

Oh, and yes, Seth did in fact burn a book named "Twilight". Yes, I've ready a little of the book, and like , my head started to hurt. I'm not too entirely sure of the storyline, so I won't comment on that, but the way it was written almost had me crying.

And speaking of Seth, like I also said in my comments, I'm at the point of insanity where I've actually gone and named my conscience. If you think I'm weird, you've yet to see the worst, I think. I'm sure you'd start thinking I needed to be taken to some mental asylum or something. Seth's an evil person. He's the little devil that's whispering my feelings and thoughts into my ear. But he's also my friend, because he knows exactly what I'm feeling and thinking. He just has this manner of making things really blunt, straightforward, and sometimes sarcastic.

Seth's just evil, really.

I'm really not sure about what to talk about, so I think I'll just stop there.

~~+++===+++===+++~~



~~+++===+++===+++~~

~kbxshadow

]]> ~kbxshadow http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/23754831/ http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/23754831/ Tue, 17 Mar 2009 21:03:55 PDT
So I'm also going to be balancing that out with my writing. -___- As if anyone really cares about that anymore, really.

And speaking of caring, if anyone gives a flying crap, the countdown's gotten to thirteen more days as of St. Paddy's Day. Whoop.

I found walkthroughs on Youtube for an in-progress Ocarina of Time and Majora's Mask. The narrator person pretty hilarious, so both me and my sister are getting a kick out of watching them. Hahaha. Ah, the Majora's Mask one was great though.

...I the Fierce Deity...

But that's beside my point. Here's another quiz thingymajig.

52 Secrets About Yourself
Be HONEST no matter what.

1. What is your natural hair color?
-- Dark dark brown. Not "sandy red". DARK BROWN.

2. Where was your ID pic taken?
-- What ID pic? Oh that? I drew that. And that's not me. That's my LoZ OC Kevyn.

3. What's your middle name?
-- Erika.

4. Your current relationship status?
-- Single.

5. Honestly, does your crush like you back?
-- No. Probably hates me even. That is, if I even HAD a cruch.

6. What is your current mood?
-- Neutral, but a little on the depressed end of things.

7. What's the color of your underwear?
-- Solid black. Yes, how kinky.

8. What is one thing that makes you happy?
-- Writing.

9.Who was the last person you cuddled with?
-- My mommy.

10. If you could go back in time, and change something what would it be?
-- If I could go back in time and change something? Ummm...My existence? ...Just kidding. I'm not sure what I'd change, really.

11. If you MUST be an animal for ONE day-
-- A wild horse of Chincoteague/Assateague.

12. Ever had a near death experience?
-- I want to, actually. Sounds weirdly cool.

13. Something you do a lot?
-- Surf the Net or write.

14. What's the name of the song stuck in your head right now?
-- Nijiro no Basu ~Utada Hikaru

15. Who did you copy and paste this from?
-- RoyalFanatic.

16. Name someone with the same b-day as you?
-- This one binge drinker guy in the same grade as me...

17. When was the last time you cried?
-- Last night.

18. Have you ever sang in front of a large audience?
-- Yeah.

19. If you could have one super power what would it be?
-- Element-kinesis and that kind of whatnot.

20. What's the first thing you notice about the opposite sex?
-- Voice.

22. What’s your biggest secret?
-- There's this person I've subtly liked over the years...

23. What's your favorite color?
-- I dunno, actually. It's between red, blue, green, black, and white though.

24. When was the last time you lied?
-- Quite recently, I'll bet. I just don't remember it.

25. Do you still watch kiddy movies or TV shows?
-- I used to watch Blue's Clues BEFORE Steve decided he wanted to be a rocker instead of my pre-K idol. When did Joe switch in? 2006 or something like that? Yeah. But now I have no cable, so I don't watch those kinds of things anymore.

27. What are you eating or drinking at the moment?
-- Eating nothing, drinking guava nectar.

28. What's your favorite smell?
-- The smell of the sea.

29. If you could describe life in one word what would it be?
-- Worthless. -___-

30. When was the last time you gave/received a hug?
-- A few days ago, I think, not including the virtual hugs I get all the time.

31. Have you ever been kissed in the rain?
-- How romantic...It's...something in one of my distant dreams...that'll never happen.

32. What are you thinking about right now?
-- That US History homework I should be doing right now. And other depressing thoughts.

33. What should you be doing?
-- My US History homework.

34. What was the last thing that made you upset?
-- My utter and sheer uselessness. -___-

35. Do you like working in the yard?
-- No. I'm not much of an outdoors person.

36. If you could have any last name in the world, what would you want?
-- Something foreign and dragon-y. I can't think of anything right now.... ]]> ~kbxshadow http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/23548088/ http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/23548088/ Thu, 05 Mar 2009 20:37:43 PST Maybe because of all the rain that's been going on lately. Rain makes me think. Weird, yes, but...it works.

Moving on, though.

It's been cold. Like, really. Because of the rain. But strangely, I'm not necessarily freezing my butt off either. Hahahaha. Robot Kbxshadow strikes back.

Oh! I remember what I wanted to tell you all. You can start counting down to my birthday if you really give a care. Uh...as of March 6th, it'll be twenty-four more days. Yeah.

Hm. I feel old.

Anyway, I pirated another quiz thingy from .

SEVEN THINGS YOU WILL FIND IN YOUR ROOM:
1. A messy desk with my laptop on it.
2. A shelf with my stash of notebooks and the Wii and GCN cases on top.
3. A buncha books.
4. A Legend of Zelda: Majora's Mask poster.
5. A One Piece calendar.
6. A One Piece puzzle picture.
7. A black, red, gold, and white blanket with and Oriental dragon and phoenix.

SEVEN RELATIONSHIP QUESTIONS:
1. do you like someone?
Maaaaaybe. Maaaaaybe not. I cooould be lying, or I might not. Who knows?

2. does someone like you?
Probably not.

3. who was your last crush?
Please don't put me through the torture of remembering him...

4. have you ever been lead on?
How am I supposed to know that? Well, actually, yeah, I have...I think.

5. have you ever been cheated on?
I've never even been in a relationship. Is this just rubbing it in my face even more?

6. do you want to be in a relationship?
Well, it depends on who it is.

7. do you wanna get married?
NO.

SEVEN THINGS YOU CANT LIVE WITHOUT:
1. My Toon Link plush...
2. My various writing notebooks.
3. My Cinnamoroll plush...
4. Water.
5. Pencils.
6. Time.
7. A few particular people. Friends and family. You know who you are.

SEVEN THINGS ON YOUR MIND:
1. It's really f***ing cold with just a T-shirt and sweats...
2. I hate being on my period...
3. I need to get back to writing...
4. Whee~! Majora's Mask manga~!!!
5. Hmmm...how should I put in free indirect discourse in Light's Blood?
6. Oooh, summer college classes at Stanford, Harvard, Yale, or Notre Dame...I hope I can get those scholarships...
7. I'm hungry. Mmm. Sweet and sour pork...

SEVEN OTHER THINGS - DO YOU:
1 Believe in God?
No.

2 Had a dream come true?
Probably.

3 Read the newspaper?
On occasion. We have newspapers sitting around in the bathroom.

4 Pray?
No.

5 Have a best friend?
Yeah...I think now I can say I do without being torn apart.

6 Had braces?
Yup. And glad I did.

7 Wish on stars?
Every once in a while, I guess.

SEVEN HAVE YOU EVERS:
1 Fallen in love?
Maaaaaybe yes. Maaaaaaaybe no. If I'm lying or not is for you to decide. Zeugma!

2 Kiss someone of the same sex?
Yep, why not?

3 Cheated?
In what context? Academically and socially? Nah. Games? Of course. How do you think I was able to completely finish Twilight Princess...except for the damn Fishing Hole that bores me to death?

4. Hmm, what is the question?
I'll make up a question! Do you love me? *puppy eyes* Yeah right.

5 Ran away from home?
Close. But no, I haven't.

6 Played strip poker?
No; I'm too modest to do that.

7 Pulled an all nighter?
That's physically impossible for me to do. Seriously.

SEVEN THINGS IN THE LAST 48 HOURS HAVE YOU:
1 Cried?
Probably. I just don't remember...

2 Had fun?
Yeah! I'm having fun right now, actually.

3 Been kissed?
...Nah~...

4 Felt stupid?
Ho ho, I never feel stupid. I feel wo... ]]> ~kbxshadow http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/23372592/ http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/23372592/ Mon, 23 Feb 2009 21:20:29 PST .

[x] You have screamed at an inanimate object for 'hurting you.'
[x] You have ran into a glass/screen door.
[x] You have jumped out of a moving vehicle.
[x] You have thought of something funny and laughed, and then people gave you weird looks.
[x] You have ran into a tree/bush.
[ ] You have been called a blond. (BAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!)

TOTAL: 4


[x] You know that it IS possible to lick your elbow.
[ ] You just tried to lick your elbow.
[ ] You never knew that the Alphabet and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star had the same melody.
[ ] You just sang them to make sure.
[x] You have tripped on your own feet and fallen.
[x] You have choked on your own spit.

TOTAL: 7


[ ] You have seen the Matrix and still don't get it.
[ ] You type with three fingers or less.
[ ] You have accidentally caught something on fire.
[x] You tried to drink out of a straw, but it went into your nose.
[x] You have caught yourself drooling.

TOTAL: 9

[ ] You have fallen asleep in class.
[x] Sometimes you just stop thinking.
[x] Sometimes when you are telling a story you forget what you are talking about.
[ ] People often shake their heads and walk away from you.
[x] You are often told to use your 'inside voice.' (The ironic thing is, it's only in places where it's necessary.)

TOTAL: 12


[ ] You use your fingers to do simple math.
[ ] You have eaten a bug accidentally.
[x] You are taking this test when you should be doing something more important.
[x] You have put your clothes on backwards or inside out, and didn't realize it.
[x] You've looked all over for something and realized it was in your hand/pocket the whole time.

TOTAL: 15


[ ] You have posted bulletins because you are scared that what they say will happen if you don't.
[x] You break a lot of things.
[ ] You tilt your head when you're confused.
[x] You have fallen out of your chair before.
[x] When you're lying in bed, you try to find pictures in the texture on the ceiling.
[x] The word "um" is used frequently.
[ ] You don't know what "um" means.
[x] You say "what" and "huh" a lot.
[ ] You plan to use a calculator to multiply your score for this bulletin.

TOTAL: 20


NOW, take your total, and multiply it by 4.
and re-post as: I am --% Mentally ill

Um...yeah. At any rate, moving on to the next subject!!

So on the very day that I said I was going to attempt the Water Temple, I conquered the damn place. Thanks to Simimaelian telling me to look out for certain things if I ever got around to the Water Temple, my excursions through the place weren't entirely terrible.

But once I got around to Dark Link, all hell broke loose. Honestly. First I didn't realize what I was supposed to do get him to show up so I was running aimlessly around the illusion room yelling curses at the TV screen ("Where's that little fucker?!"). So I finally got it into my head to go see the other door, which I had assumed would be a no-go considering I knew what the point of that damn room was. But no, I go to the door, turn around, and of course, there he is.

Then I go to fight him. Sword doesn't work. Of course. But I still jumped when I found that he could stand on the blade. Button mashing and wild cursing ensues. Of course. But I manage to get his black ass off of the sword and never use it again except for when I needed the shield to block him. Why? Because next I used the hammer. I love that hammer.

Then again, I like anything that's solid, heavy, blunt, and capable of inflicting pain. But thanks to that and good ol' Din's Fire, Dark Link got the smackdown.

...Okay. Let me be honest, then. If curses were daggers, my poor TV screen would have exploded into pieces, and both Link and Dark Link would have been pincushions...Except with daggers. I couldn't tell you how many times I yelled, cussed, hollered, and screamed at the TV screen, specifically at frickin' Link who somehow always manages to screw up my steady flow of gameplay. Dammit.

So that's my quick update for now. See you later.

~~+++===+++===+++~~

http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/23302386/ Fri, 20 Feb 2009 07:58:06 PST
But anyway.

Ocarina of Time.

I've actually been stuck in the Forest Temple for all this time, really. Those damn Stalfoses were getting on my nerves, so I'd actually quit playing it for a while. Then I got some hints on it. Apparently doing the Spin Attack worked. Not for me. So after dying like...numerous times, I finally went with the old-fashioned way of bludgeoning both of them alternately until I finally finished it. So then I continued on through a hell of a lot of confusion until I got to Phantom Ganon.

That boss battle just made me like Twilight Princess and Majora's Mask even more, really. But I finished it, got the Forest Medallion, and moved on. Whee, Fire Temple.

I love that hammer. I don't know why. Maybe because it's a solid blunt object that I can use to beat the shiznit out of stuff. So I had a good time fighting Volvagia. Nothing like the manga adaptation of the fight, but it was still fun. But how does that skinny thing eat pudgy Gorons? That's my ultimate question.

And that's my Ocarina of Time excursions so far. Well, I take that back.

Now I'm in the Ice Cavern, precursor to the dreaded...

WATER TEMPLE.

So it's supposed to be one of the hardest dungeons in Ocarina of Time, right? What with the miniboss being Dark Link and all? My sister wanted to know what the fuss over the Water Temple was about, so I'll be trying to tackle that today. If I get mad, well, I'd feel sorry for our poor Classic Controller. Maybe even the Wii Remote too.

So I'll tell you what happens after I finish the damn place. Who knows? I'll probably have worse hell in the Shadow Temple. I'm deathly afraid of the ReDeads in Ocarina of Time. At least in Majora's Mask, you got to wear this mask that made the ReDeads dance for you. And in Twilight Princess, All it took was two bomb arrows. If that didn't work, biting and chomping away at them in lupine form did the trick. And Wolf Link can jump pretty far if he's in Attack Mode. Ocarina of Time? It seems to me you've only got your sword, shield, and "sharp instincts".

Well, that's my shpiel for now. See you later.

~~+++===+++===+++~~



~~+++===+++===+++~~


~kbxshadow

]]> ~kbxshadow http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/23007594/ http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/23007594/ Wed, 04 Feb 2009 17:29:12 PST Twilight war dilemma, but I was laughing my ASS off when I saw what he had to say. "...She can't write for a darn..." or so King says.

While he does say that Meyer's can effectively appeal to her audience (hopeless teenage girls), King just flat out said it: Stephanie Meyer can't write for scat.

Laugh with me.

Then he gets into comparing J.K. Rowling and Meyer, and I think that's where I lost interest. Frankly, I'm not as interested in the Harry Potter series as I used to be, sorry. While the storyline's great and all, the characters piss me off and Harry really just mooches the victories off of people. In my definition of a Mary-Sue (or Gary-Stu), Harry's spot on. -__- Which is why I haven't even opened the cover of the seventh one even as of yet. And when did it come out? Exactly.

On a separate note, Light's Blood, my first-ever Legend of Zelda fic, has been updated to its fifth chapter, and still no reviews. I'm getting hits on it, and I got a fave for it, but I wish I had some feedback, know what I mean? I've never written in the Legend of Zelda setting, AND I'm experimenting with a new OC at the same time, so I'd been hoping for some feedback to see what I can do to make Light's Blood even better.

So if you're into that whole Legend of Zelda thing and you feel like you need to read something, can I ask some of you people to read and review that fic for me? I desperately need some form of feedback for future updates, since I want to make this even better than TSBW. Even my sister's helping me out by going through Twilight Princess with me so that I can refresh my memory on certain things that strategy guide won't show. That's saying something, I hope.

So I'll leave off on that note for now. See you later.

~~+++===+++===+++~~



~~+++===+++===+++~~


~kbxshadow

]]> ~kbxshadow http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/22788218/ http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/22788218/ Sat, 24 Jan 2009 18:12:07 PST . It seems pretty fun. Here goes.

The Letter A
Are you available?: Yeah, I suppose so, but I'm not really lookin' for a relationship.
What is your age?: Can I keep that to myself for now?
What annoys you?: Many things. Let's just leave it at that.

The Letter B
Do you live in a big house?: Nah...
When is your birthday?: March 30th
Who is your best friend: That's a rather hard issue to cover without offending people, for some reason. I'll just say you know who you are. :wink:

The Letter C
What’s your favorite candy?: Some kind of Japanese candy that I can't think of off the top of my head...
Who’s your crush?: What if I don't have one? D:
When was the last time you cried?: I won't say.

The Letter D
Do you daydream?: But of course. It's why I write.
What’s your favorite kind of dog?: I'm torn between Shiba Inus and Akitas.
What day of the week is it?: Saturday

The Letter E
How do you like your eggs?: Pretty much anyway as long as they're made right.
Have you ever been in the emergency room?: Yes! It was QUITE an ADVENTURE!
What’s the easiest thing ever to do?: For me? Sleep, eat, and laugh.

The Letter F
Have you ever flown in a plane?: Yup.
Do you use fly swatters?: Nope. Good ol' rolled-up newspapers for me.
Have you ever used a foghorn?: 8D I WOULD SO LOVE TO.

The Letter G
Do you chew gum?: ...Disgusting little pieces of crud, you mean?
Are you a giver or a taker?: I'm not sure, really. I'd personally say taker.
Do you like gummy candies?: They're just like gum. Disgusting little pieces of crud.

The Letter H
How are you?: Quite excited. And my rear end hurts from sitting around and typing stuff.
What color is your hair?: It's been debated to be "sandy red", but I'll go with very dark brown.

The Letter I
What’s your favorite ice cream?: 8D Strawberry cheesecake.
Have you ever ice skated?: Yup. Got pretty good at it before I quit too.
Do you play an instrument?: Flautists rule! I will own your silly Guitar Hero nonsense with my flute! ...Not.

The Letter J
What’s your favorite jelly bean brand?: Jelly beans are rather disgusting too...
Do you wear jewelry?: Nope. I get distracted with them too easily.

The Letter K
Who do you want to kill?: Many people that I shall not reveal.
Do you want kids?: Disgusting FREAKS.
Where did you go for kindergarten?: This is just another way to stalk me, believe me. Somewhere in North Carolina is all I'm going to say.

The Letter L
Are you laid back?: *looks over at stack of fics to type up* *kicks back and relaxes*
Do you lie?: Should I answer this? It might question my credibility.

The Letter M
Whats your favorite movie?: I'm torn between the Rush Hour series and Spirit: Stallion of the Cimmaron...
Do you still watch Disney movies?: Yes!
Do you like mangos?: BLECK.

The Letter N
Do you have a nickname?: Yes, and I have more than one, but I won't say.
Whats your real name?: You know if you know, if you don't, sorry.
Whats your favorite number?: 4
Do you prefer night over day?: They both have their quirks, don't you think?

The Letter O
What’s your one wish?: Something. If I tell you, then it won't come true.
Are you an only child?: Nope! I do have a younger sibling.

The Letter P
What one fear are you most paranoid about?: Get back to me on that one, since I'm not necessarily paranoid about spiders. I'd just rather not see them.
What are your pet peeves?: Many things, but I think the umbrella idea is ideology.
What’s a pers... ]]> ~kbxshadow http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/22674366/ http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/22674366/ Mon, 19 Jan 2009 13:31:30 PST
Then again, I'm in a pretty iffy position, what with being half black American and half Asian. I'm like...the minority of minorities. Not that that's bad or anything; I think it's cool.

I have finals on Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday. Wish me luck. I'll need it badly for the Stats final and especially the AP Chem final. Ho boy, that will be fun. -_-

So right now, I'm just kinda lonely relaxing...My sister's not around to bother me with her video game madness and I'm struggling to get over this Legend of Zelda faze I seem to be in right now. Playing Phantom Hourglass actually isn't helping, and no, I haven't finished it even as of yet. And it's been...a year and a month or so. I think. But at least I finally got the Phantom Sword. Those Phantoms had better watch out now. Oh yes, Karma and Wrath are coming back to getcha liddle bastards...

I'm over my cold now, at least, and my crankiness level's gone way down. Yes, my temporary Split Personality Disorder's now gone. Sorry about it if you were somehow hurt by it. Though, I have moments of depression, but that's not anything new. 'Sides, I'm sure it's normal for a lot of people, right? It's what we call "moments", correct?

Moving on with our lives now...

I actually sat down and started looking through these old, old RP's that I've been keeping...And when I say old, I mean like...almost three years ago kinda old. Seems old enough to me, and seeing some of my characters in their most immature stages gets me laughing. And disgusted at the same time. But I still keep those RPs 'cause they remind me of so many things that went on. Especially the wheelchair thing. I owe those months to , and if you see her around, give her kudos for me, 'kay? I probably would have disappeared from the face of the world if it hadn't been for her constant support. >.<

And even now, she's one of the most understanding friends I've had. Note "one of", since there are others out there who I owe my thanks and kudos to.

I haven't been writing anything, though I'm sure you've been expecting that. Well, I have all these ideas and stuff in my mind, but the problem is, I think much much faster than I can write or type, so ideas escape me really quickly. I'm sure people like or can attest for how fast I can talk. Now when I think, I think a lot faster than I can talk, unfortunately...Even I can't keep up with my thoughts.

That's another thing that bothers me. I think in two different languages. Which is why I'm useless in discussions for English class. I'll have a really strong point to make, and I'll start saying it, but then my mind switches from thinking in English to thinking in Japanese, so I get really confused and my words make no sense whatsoever. It's a trouble, really.

Well, I don't have much to go on about now, so Happy MLK Day to everyone~.

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~kbxshadow

]]> ~kbxshadow http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/22566267/ http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/22566267/ Tue, 13 Jan 2009 18:30:04 PST
I'm really sorry for making such a big deal out of things. I know that there are others who have it worse than I do, and what do I do? I whine about my own problems and don't acknowledge others'. Well now.

I had this physical fitness test today and nearly died. >.< Other than the run, I did pretty well in the other fields. The problem is, as we were starting, I began to realize how crazy ruined my body is. Like seriously. I'll see how long this list can get.

-- Broken ankle screwed back into place with two huge screws.
-- Broken leg mended back together but still weak. Working this leg too much gets me to limp. Hooray for the gimps, eh, Simi?
-- I smashed a rifle into my finger back in marching season. It still hurts.
-- Strained the muscles in my right arm from bowling with a ball I wasn't so used to.
-- I won't go over the other 20-some-number scars that I have all over myself.
-- Sick with a bad cough, lightheaded, and congested.

Eh, not much of a long list, but it's good enough for me. How am I still intact, really and honestly?

Just still noting now: Light's Blood has been newly revised and updated...and the 29th chapter to TSBW was added on December 20th of 2008...Reviews are kinda dying. They'd make my day, though, no matter if they were flames or not.

Oh well, see you later then.

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~kbxshadow

]]> ~kbxshadow http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/22257122/ http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/22257122/ Fri, 02 Jan 2009 19:56:44 PST
Rather, I'll be working on revising Light's Blood big time. That's my main thing. Before, when I was first writing it, I didn't really have a strong basis for Kevyn and Jessie, so while writing their conversations were fun, I couldn't get a grasp of the motives and reasons behind the events of Light's Blood. Believe me, it's pretty difficult to write a character who's just aimlessly wandering the world...

And then there's Rave of Chaos, which I have the next chapter written up. I just have to get off my lazy bum and type up the chapters.

EDIT: So, you know, TSBW's 29th chapter was put up on the 20th of December 2008, and I reposted Light's Blood on ff.net. Have fun~!

Anyone notice a trend here? I honestly don't like the typing part of it.

Moving on, I'm going to now post a quiz of sorts...It's up to you to put it in my comments or send it as a note. Here you go.

"What If.."
I died:
I kissed you:
I lived next door to you:
You found out I was married:
I stole something:
I was hospitalized:
I refused to leave my home:
I got into a fight while you were there:

"Would You.."
Help me hide a body:
Keep a secret if I told you one:
Hold my hand:
Take a bullet for me:
Try to solve my problems:
Love me:
Date me:

"Have You Ever.."
Lied to make me feel better:
Lied for me:
Wanted to kiss me:
Wanted to kill me:
Broke my heart:
Betrayed me:
Kept something important from me:
Thought I was unbearably annoying/felt like you couldn't stand me:

Who are you:
Are we friends:
When and how did we meet:
Describe me in three words:
What was your first impression:
Do you still think that way about me now:
What reminds you of me:
If you could give me anything, what would it be:
How well do you know me:
When was the last time you saw me:
Ever wanted to tell me something you couldn't:
Are you gonna repost this to see what I say about you:

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~kbxshadow

]]> ~kbxshadow http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/22122789/ http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/22122789/ Mon, 22 Dec 2008 13:31:16 PST
I'm actually trying to finish up that Seven Moments of Christmast thing on ff.net right now...I'm not sure how I want to start the next present. Truthfully speaking, that's what I've been muddled about for the past year. I wasn't too sure how to even start the next chapter.

But hey, I got TSBW updated, and I'm working on the next chapter right now. Winter Break's great so far.

So together with my sister, I've managed to beat Tales of Symphonia. It was pretty disastrous, if I've got to say. See, both of us really like Zelos. But at the same time, we had no clue what would have happened if we chosen Kratos. So as an experiment, we chose Kratos.

I couldn't even begin to tell you the despair-wrought-10-year-old sister I had to deal with when we had to fight Zelos. I'm never doing that again. 'Sides, there's a lot of stuff to unlock when Zelos is part of the group. Yay, Zelos.

I am finally part of the group that managed to beat Abyssion. Oh yeah...

I have yet to go to Niflheim, though. I'm quite terrified to go, really.

And I think I'll stop my ramblings here. I'm getting tired of typing. Later.

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~kbxshadow

]]> ~kbxshadow http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/21905838/ http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/21905838/ Tue, 09 Dec 2008 20:18:21 PST
1. Begin living now.
2. Live in the present.
3. Stop asking to be rescued.
4. Stop waiting "until..."
5. Journal your thoughts and feelings.
6. Keep track of your accomplishments.
7. Set realistic and attainable goals.
8. Accept constructive criticism from others.
9. Choose your friends wisely.
10. Be honest about how you feel.
11. Ask for what you need and want.
12. Make friends with people who like themselves.
13. Stop feeling sorry for yourself.
14. Emphasize your strenghts and minimize your weaknesses.
15. Let other people run their lives.
16. Give permission to yourself to be afraid of failure and success.
17. Develop your personal talents and skills.
18. Learn to accept what you cannot change.
19. Get proper nutrition.
20. Get sufficient rest.
21. Exercise regularly.
22. Stop talking about your miseries.
23. Talk about your strengths and assets.
24. Think positively.
25. Read about human growth.
26. Learn to meditate.
27. Learn from children.
28. Take time to smell the roses.
29. Stop blaming others for your misfortunes.
30. Take responsibility for your thoughts, feelings, and behaviors.
31. Dress in a way that feels good for you.
32. Encourage others to be the best they can be.
33. Stop assuming that others cannot get along without you.
34. Stop feeling good only when doing for others.
35. Be playful.
36. Share responsibilities.
37. Ask for strokes.
38. Listen to poeple.
39. Compromise on occasion.
40. Take a risk.
41. Stop being a doormat.
42. Make decisions for personal growth.
43. Have fun.
44. Sing.
45. Dance.
46. Face life with dignity.
47. Treat others how you desire to be treated.
48. Do something exciting.
49. Vary your routine.
50. Stop letting others push you around.
51. Do something you'd really like to do for YOU.
52. Get a medical and dental checkup.
53. Be alert.
54. Organize your work.
55. Focus on one task at a time.
56. Spend time alone.
57. Read a good book.
58. Curl up on the couch and watch a great movie.
59. Redecorate your home.
60. Make your living environment comfortable.
61. Resolve your problem today.
62. Set boundaries.
63. Live with gratitude.
64. Let go of what is lost.
65. Turn on your answering machine.
66. Listen to the sound of your own voice.
67. Encourage others to take responsibility for themselves.
68. Encourage gentleness in yourself and others.
69. Enjoy your sexuality.
70. Face painful situations head-on.
71. Enjoy being paid well for a job well done.
72. Repeat actions that result in exhilaration.
73. Get into loose-fitting clothes at home.
74. Love yourself completely.
75. Remember that you are an adult.

I dunno about some of these, actually. It seems to me they'd cause more stress than reduce, but like I said, they're just suggestions from eDiets contributor Dr. Susan Mendelsohn.

So that's my shpiel for today. See you later.

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~kbxshadow

]]> ~kbxshadow http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/21679076/ http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/21679076/ Wed, 26 Nov 2008 10:55:29 PST
It's pretty BADASS.

SEGA's finally got their act together with this game, really. Sonic is Sonic again in the daytime stages - the gameplay's really fast and it's all so straightforward, unlike Secret Rings where you pretty much drive Sonic around - and it's like...amazing. Most of the stages are just...beautiful. Like the first stage. Apotos. It is most beautiful thing ever. It's a seaside city with a whole bunch of white buildings...it's just awesome.

Then when nighttime rolls around...

That's when I say "Did SEGA copy some stuff from God of War?"

'Cause honestly, there are a LOT of components to the nighttime gameplay that are like...analogous to God of War.

Take the battling system for instance. It's an all-out melee in Sonic Unleashed, exactly like God of War. You can chain combos together, and depending on how many combos you chain together, you can even get bonus points. Exactly like God of War. Oh, and the way Werehog Sonic battles, at least the battle patterns, are all pretty much the SAME as Kratos in God of War.

And did I mention that Werehog Sonic's stretching arms are the same as chains Kratos uses for longer reach with his blades? Oh, and their battle patterns are exactly the same.

And then there's Context-Sensitive commands in Werehog boss battles. Like God of War. You have to input a series of button commands at the right time in order to do the most damage to a certain boss. While it may not be as gruesome in Sonic Unleashed, the combinations you can do are simply amazing.

And the orbs!! The orbs are the big giveaway in Sonic Unleashed. You see, in God of War, there's three different colors of orbs: red, green, and blue. Red orbs are like experience points. The more red orbs you have in God of War, the more special attacks you can unlock and level up the power of each special attack or weapon. Blue orbs in God of War restore magic points so you can use the gods' or titans' power depending on which God of War you're talking about. And green orbs restore health.

Well guess what? Sonic Unleashed has three different colored orbs. Red, blue...and green! Red orbs ARE experience points for Werehog Sonic so you can unlock special Werehog skills and...level up your attacks and such! Blue orbs restore the Unleashed gauge, where Unleashed for Werehog Sonic is simply just a mode where his attacks and moves are all hyped up. And green orbs - you guessed it - restore health!

So I guess I can say the reason why I like Sonic Unleashed so much is because of the fact that the Werehog gameplay is EXACTLY like that of God of War. Which, in fact, is a game I just love watching my dad play. I'd be too scared to play it myself. Though I've gotta say, I helped Dad finish God of War 2. If I hadn't done it, I don't think he woulda been able to finish it. 'Sides, I got to shank the shit out of Zeus. Who wouldn't have fun doing that?

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Now on to a separate topic!

I have a new Hylian character.

He'll be appearing in Light's Blood along with Kevyn and Link...once I get around to writing it a little more.

The fellow's name's Reeon, and I've gotta admit, he's probably the best OC I've made other than Kevyn and Mark.

And speaking of Kevyn, I finally found nicknames to give her and Jessie when it comes down to their status as wanted thieves. They have separate wanted posters, but are both wanted at the same time. Kevyn's been nicknamed by the press and public "The Silver Vixen" and Jessie was given the nickname "The Scarlet Reynard". Smooth, cool, and sexy. That's the approach I took for their nicknames. I think I did a pretty good job.

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Happy Thanksgiving, everyone~!

~kbxshadow

]]> ~kbxshadow http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/21412659/ http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/21412659/ Sun, 09 Nov 2008 21:18:38 PST

You know, it was actually kinda funny how easy it was in the end...

Then again, I AM the one who just kinda goes into battles with this extreme gusto. I use brute force, so really for most of the game, Lloyd was my best friend. -_-; Oh, so then Raine was my most important character. Yeah. She really helped with my pure recklessness.

You can imagine my panic when I found that all of my companions were all "sacrificing" theirselves at the Tower of Salvation for Lloyd's sake. Holy crap I've never been so scared. Oh, and that last fight against Kratos. No me gusta peligroso mejor, ja? At least, not by myself. It's a wonder I survived through that mess.

Then I found a strategy guide online and also discovered the stuff I missed. Like, a lot...

But hey, at least I've finished the game and now I won't have RF and SS025 breathing down my neck to play it.

Though I've gotta say, the case says "over 80 hours" and I thought the main storyline was that long. Boy was I wrong. So in that sense, I was slightly disappointed.

I did seriously like the way Lloyd matured throughout the game, though. Even though he has this major inferiority complex where he's getting emo over something he's done pretty much every few minutes, his non-brightness makes up for it. Hooray for the stupids.

The interaction between Lloyd and Genis always reminded me of Sonic and Tails. Genis even SOUNDS like Tails, so that was the more disturbing part of it.

Anyway.

Kratos made me mad more than anything. I swear, his intent, as well as the intent of the whole freaking game, was to confuse me. Don't get me wrong: I understand what the hell went on, but each time Kratos showed up, I seriously yelled at the TV screen. "GTFO mah screen!!" Except not that way. It was a little bit more angry.

My poor sister. She adored Kratos, really, and I can see why, but when the dramatic turnabout happened (you know, the whole "ZOMG KRATOS IS ANGEL AND CRUXIS" part) she was crushed. I don't think she's forgiven him yet even though he decides to carry the burden of Cruxis's mistakes by leaving his son and traveling on Dherris-Kharlan. That epilogue was the only part I actually almost cried on, and yet still my sister seemed pretty angry and stoic about Kratos.

She had the same fit with Zelos too. Personally, I like Zelos. He reminds me of Miroku from Inuyasha, except not as smart. Well, I guess Zelos has his really clever moments, so at least he's smarter than Lloyd. (Then again, who isn't?) Anyway, I liked Zelos. And then he had his little dramatic turnabout, and my sister went into a RAGE. A RAGE, I tell you, a pure OUTRAGE. But at least (for my playthrough) he came back, so Zelos redeemed himself in my sister's book.

And speaking Lloyd's brightness, I really want to know where he got those stupid genes from. I mean, honestly. What the hell happened to him? I don't want to blame it on the fact that Dirk was raising him, and that REALLY wouldn't be the case since it's been confirmed that Lloyd's always had trouble memorizing stuff. Seeing how Kratos is pretty damn intelligent, I really hope Anna isn't the one who gave Lloyd the stupid genes. Or maybe it's a recessive trait, and one of the parents is just a carrier.

And so the mystery remains.

Oh yeah, needless to say, Mithos pissed me off.

HOLY CRAP the Summon Spirits!! They're AWESOME. I haven't gotten around to Maxwell yet, but I know for a fact this is my priority list of the Summon Spirits:

1. Shadow
2. Celsius
3. Undine
4. Aska & Luna
5. Volt
6. Efreet
7. Sylph
8. Gnome

I can't STAND Gnome. I swear, if I could own a mole and name it Gnome, I would drown it! I HATE Gnome.

But Shadow was KICK. ASS. I had so much fun fighting Shadow. It was epic and amazing and just pure fun. Same with Undine. Then again, Undine's just awesome. xDDD

I'm not gonna get into Origin and Maxwell just because I don't know them too well. I can say that Origin scared me thoroughly, though.

Let's see, and since I'm on the subject of characters, I'll make a priority list of my fave main characters.

1. Lloyd
2. Sheena
3. Zelos
4. Presea
5. Genis
6. Raine
7. Regal
8. Colette
9. Kratos

Like I said, Kratos made me mad, so it'll be hard to do anything about that for a while. The list doesn't mean I hate hate him or anything, though. The characters are all cool and all, but some of them just kinda annoyed me badly.

Anywho...I think I'll leave off with... ]]> ~kbxshadow http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/21132831/ http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/21132831/ Thu, 23 Oct 2008 21:30:01 PDT
Hmm. Where to start.

I've been asked to get a Facebook. I wouldn't mind, since I finally got rid of my MySpace account. I swear, that damn website wanted to me stick around - it kept on saying I had errors every time I tried to go the "My Account" page. What a cheat.

I guess it would be fun to get a Facebook, since the whole band's on there pretty much, and I have a bunch of pictures that have to go up on the Internet so's people can see. That would be fun. I just need to find the time to do it. Dag.

So we performed at my old middle school tonight. And I failed the opening announcements 'cause I thought I would be given a chance to talk between each song. So much for thinking.

According to one of the parents, though, we apparently sounded pretty damn good. Which I'm skeptical about since the place we played at makes sounds ring and echo for eons. But I'll take her word for it.

I'm helping out on Election Day, yay~. I just have to study the manual they gave us. I swear, I've never felt so stupid in my life. I'm getting horribly confused over things that seem so simple.

I need to think of a thesis for this essay for English. But I can't. It's kinda hard when the themes available are all the same obvious themes. Shit.

Rejoice, band friends; I'm bringing The Book of Lists to Foothill this Saturday. This'll be fun.

I'm kinda stressed right now, which might be why I feel so ADD-like right now.

Oh crap I have Stats work to do. See you later.

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~kbxshadow

]]> ~kbxshadow http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/21087428/ http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/21087428/ Mon, 20 Oct 2008 21:40:24 PDT I'm far from obsessing over anything.

...

I think.

But anyway.

So I recently got into this anime series. I've known about it for like...at least half a year, but I never bothered to watch it even though I was so hyped up to see it. I'd never really gotten the chance to find the episodes on the Internet and watch them there. What with marching band and everything, I really couldn't.

Oh yes. The title? I know I've spazzed about it while we were at Fanime, but I can say this:

"Code Geass"

Which I originally thought would be translated to "Code Gears" since that what it sounded like, and from watching the first six episodes so far, I think that's more than plausible.

Oh yeah, the whole title? "Code Geass: Lelouch of the Rebellion".

Holy crap Lelouch is hot. xDDD Okay I'll stop. But mind, I'm not saying Suzaku isn't. There's a reason why I don't want to find TOO much fanart of these two. A VERY GOOD reason why.

But let's start from the top.

So Britannia's conquered Japan and changed its name "Area 11", where all Japanese people have become identified as "Eleveners" or some crap like that - basically the Japanese have gotten their identities taken away, and if you're a Britannian associating with an Eleven, you're screwed. Badly.

Badly because, well, Britannia's got an assload of crazy contraptions and mechanical weapons that are totally the epitome of all awesomeness (maybe they can't top Gundam fighters but they're still pretty cool). So there's no way for the Japanese to really mess with the Britannians.

If I remember right, 10 years prior to the happenings of Code Geass, Lelouch (and he's pretty much the reason why I thought the series was a tragedy) has vowed to bring down Britannia and re-establish Japan again. How, he really has no clue, but it's his lifelong dream, 'kay?

Now. About Lelouch. As far as I've gotten from just six episodes, he's really screwed. Like, REALLY screwed. First of all, if he plans on bringing down Britannia through revolution, he'll need to kill his daddy, who's the emperor of Britannia at the moment. Meaning, yes, Lelouch is also the prince of Britannia. He lives a pretty damn normal Britannian life, though, and really, this incredibly political standing Lelouch is at has me thinking he's REALLY screwed.

REALLY screwed becomes OHSHITNOWAIOUT kind of screwed when Lelouch ends up in a coincidental accident where, well, I guess I'll just jump to the point: hooray for mysterious girl coming out of a weird capsule thing clichés, 'cause that's exactly what happens. I thought this chick died when she was shot in the head, but Lelouch decides to bind a contract with this girl, and what do you know, he gains this powerful thing called the "Geass" ("Gias" in Japanese, BTW) where anyone who looks into his left eye when he uses said Geass will unknowingly bend to his will.

Which is quickly reflected when he uses the Geass to command a squad of Schutzstaffel-like gang to all just shoot theirselves on the spot. I mean, come on, it was pretty amazing to see this SS-kinda like gang just all put their handguns to their necks, say "Yes, your Highness" all in unison, then just shoot theirselves at once. Pretty. Amazing.

And this is where I start thinking "Well, why not just leave it 'Gears' instead of 'Geass'?" I mean, come on, the Geass basically allows Lelouch to look into one's mind and manipulate all the codes and gears in said one's mind so that one just, well, bends to his will.

But that's beside the point.

Lelouch, in conclusion (for now) is basically the guy who's all gung-ho about bringing down Britannia via revolution. Alias violence. And let's all admit it; he's a pretty damn clever guy.

Now about Suzaku. My sister fell head over heels for Suzaku, mainly because, and I'm not kidding: "ZOMG HE LOOKS LIKE ROY."

But I digress.

Suzaku was the son of Japan's last prime minister when Britannia invaded, so now he's really naught but a lowly Private serving in the Britannian military. And he was childhood friends with Lelouch. So I guess to sum up Suzaku's life, you can just say it sucked to be Suzaku. I mean, really. His life is worse than shit.

Take this for instance: Lelouch manages to assassinate his brother Clovis (who was the ruling head of Area 11 at the time), but who's accused? Suzaku. Of course. At least Lelouch manages to save Suzaku's ass from getting executed, but still. "Your fingerprints were on the gun that was used to kill Prince Clovis!" My ass. They just wanted a scapegoat, and poor Suzaku was the one who received the whole brunt of it. Poor fellow.

But in compensation, Suzaku gets to pilot thi... ]]> ~kbxshadow http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/20977845/ http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/20977845/ Mon, 13 Oct 2008 21:25:02 PDT
Which gets me thinking. Hey, someone needs to tell me what Steven's username is. I wanna devStalk him. xDDD

So the challenge from about two months ago has died. Haha. Big surprise. But I'm still pretty set on trying to get some form of music video choreography writing stuff based on music. You get my drift. It really does sound fun.

But maybe I'm really only saying that because I can't think of anything else to write.

Oh! Maybe I'll send in that Fantasy Series contest entry that'll never be judged. Then I can at least prove that I'm not entirely dead. What an idea.

Hmm...I still can't think of anything to write. It's not necessarily a writer's block, I'm just kinda like "Well, I wanna write about that, but I can't think of the words to write it with." I guess that is a block, huh?

Wait, there's no such thing as blocks, what am I saying?!

I'll get back to you people some other time. See ya later!

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~kbxshadow

]]> ~kbxshadow http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/20881474/ http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/20881474/ Tue, 07 Oct 2008 20:43:58 PDT
I updated already.

It actually turned out to be a pretty good chappie.

So go ahead and have fun with that.

I will leave you now with this tiny journal.

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~kbxshadow

]]> ~kbxshadow http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/20677037/ http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/20677037/ Thu, 25 Sep 2008 20:37:12 PDT .

1. What is your favorite element?
-- I hate these kinds of questions, since I'm always stuck between Psychic, Steel, Ghost, and Dragon.


2. What are your three favorite starters?
-- Even worse. Maybe Charmander, Torchic, and Cyndaquil. They are so very cute and deserve many hugs from me.


3. What games do you have?
-- Not a whole lot...Silver, Sapphire, FireRed, Gale of Darkness, Colosseum, Diamond, and Pearl. I'm kinda starting to want Battle Revolution and Platinum Version, too.


4. In the games, which gender do you normally choose?
-- ...Male? I dunno.

5. Do you watch the anime?
-- It's sad. I'm getting back into them. And I've progressed pretty far in Advanced Generation.

6. How many seen in the pokedex of your latest game?
-- Seen? 320.

7. And how many caught in that pokedex?
-- You don't want to ask me that...Like...195.

8. Do you even like Pokemon?
-- It's sad. I'm completely back into it again.

9. Do you collect the Trading Cards?
-- I used to. I was always looking for the holographic cards. I swear, I'm like a jackdaw or crow. I love shiny stuff.

10. If you have the Trading Cards, do you play the game or just collect?
-- *see above answer* ...Caw! Caw!

11. Do you have an account on Bulbapedia?
-- ...The heck is that?

12. If yes, what is your username there?
-- It would be the same old kbxshadow if I were there...

13. Do you have a lot of Pokemon pics/stories faved?
-- Nah, not a whole lot. I should look for more.

14. Do you draw Pokemon?
-- *is actually working on a big PKMN drawing project now* But generally speaking, no.

15. Do you write about Pokemon?
-- I want to! And I've actually attempted before, but it didn't really work. I have an OC trainer character, so...

16. If yes to either 14 or 15, are your stories/drawings faved?
-- It would definitely be nice if they are faved.


17. What is your favourite Pokemon?
-- I'm torn between Espeon, Lucario, and Milotic.


18. And your second favourite?
-- I'm torn between Mismagius and Gardevoir.


19. What is your favourite legendary?
-- Probably Giratina, since it kicked Dialga's ass (or at least attempted to) in the newest movie.


20. And your second favourite legendary?
-- MEWTWO. 'Cause he's just...you know...kickass.


21. Do you know what 493 is in the National Pokedex?
-- Yup!


22. What is it?
-- It be Arceus.

Question 23
Would you rather have a Meowth or a Growlithe?
-- Growlithe. 'Cause it evolves into Arcanine. And I Arcanine. Very high Attack and Sp. Attack ratings, you know. xD


24. How many of your relatives like Pokemon?
-- One...two...three...*goes on*


How often do you think about Pokemon?
-- Not excessively, I hope.


26. Do you keep the fact you like Pokemon from your real life friends?
-- Nope. In fact, I'm the only one who has a Ho-oh and Lugia, so we have much trading going on.

27. What pets do you have that resemble Pokemon?
-- I have no pets!


28. What Pokemon do you hate most?
-- Nosepass. And Probopass. Who would want to have giant noses as Pokémon? They're fugly.


29. Which eeveelution do you like best?
-- Espeon!!


30. Which Castform form is best?
-- The Ice form!


31. Which Deoxys forme is best?
-- I like the...Speed Form.


32. Which Giratina forme is best?
-- ORIGIN FORME!! ORIGIN FORME KICKS TOTAL ASS.


33. Skymin or Shaymin?
-- Well, they're actually both "Shaymin", the puppy version's just its Sky Forme...I actually like both of them.


34. Phione or Manaphy?
-- Manaphy. Just because.


35. Darkrai or Cresselia?
-- Cresselia's a wuss. At least Darkrai actually fights you.
<... ]]> ~kbxshadow http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/20462626/ http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/20462626/ Fri, 12 Sep 2008 21:16:42 PDT
No really, it's true. Plus there's also marching band to worry about. T^T

You know, I'm very much screwed for marching band if my ankle keeps fucking up the way it did on Wednesday. You know the whole shpiel: temperatures drop, ankle gets cold, ankle locks up, knee locks up, and huzzah, now my whole left leg refuses to do anything else. It was quite terrible, as well as frustrating, to say in the least.

Oh yes. Classes. School. Yes.

1st: Art
2nd: English 3 Honors
3rd: US History
5th: AP Statistics
6th: ROTC
7th: AP Chemistry
8th: Band

Yes. It's not very pretty, I guess. Well, actually, the classes are pretty easy. It's the pace and homework load that get to me. Actually, it's not that bad, since it's not mandatory to do AP Chem homework. Of course, I've no time to do the "recommended" homework for AP Chem because of band. Whoever thought the marching band was so hardcore, hm? I'd almost forgotten.

Whoo hoo. Junior year. College applications. SATs. And SAT classes. And other such fun stuff. *sigh* It's going to be an incredibly busy year this year. But at least there aren't any HUGE HUGE projects like the SHARP report last year. Thank gosh.

I can't wait to make stuff asplode in Chem.

I really want to move down to LA. How fun would that be, you know? No, not Louisiana. Cali people know what I'm talking about. My priority college's down there. It is most excellent.

I have to stop talking like Simi, god dammit.

I'm helping her and her sister with moosix. I practice conducting and the learn/improve on reading music. It's a win-win situation that I really do like.

So yeah, this basically means that I won't be on too often until the marching season's over. If you do catch me on, though, a little message is a good encouragement. Or maybe a surprise review on one of my fics. Or a surprise comment on something. It's slightly depressing to not have anything from anyone on my other fics or drawings. T^T

So I'm really sorry, internet ppls. I have a life I need to go and lead, which consists of physical training, homework, and marching band. *sigh* I'll see you when I'm not busy, but I still luff you all.

Not.

Haha. JK.

You people are awesome. Seriously.

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~kbxshadow

]]> ~kbxshadow http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/20025248/ http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/20025248/ Mon, 18 Aug 2008 15:15:06 PDT
Then! I'm going to write a visual oneshot for each song! What characters I use, if any, will be dependent on my imagination!

After that! I'll post them on deviantART!

In my comments! I'll MAYBE provide a translation of the song I use when I write to a Japanese song. Yay J-Pop!

I'll give proper credits to whatever.

It's just something to help my imagination to get into gear for when it dies during the school year. Yuck.

But it happens.

And 'sides, I need to update something on this site other than journals.

And then! And then! Once I finish 10, I'll choose another ten. And go on from there. Just 'cause it might be fun.

So! Here are my first ten songs!

1. Stay Gold ~Utada Hikaru
2. Aurora ~Do As Infinity
3. Celebrate ~Utada Hikaru
4. Blood on the Dance Floor ~Michael Jackson
5. Why Do I Feel So Sad ~Alicia Keys
6. Tangerine Dream ~Do As Infinity
7. Callas Went Away ~Enigma
8. Silent Prayer ~Johnny Gill
9. The Roof ~Mariah Carey
10. How Do I Breathe ~Mario

When I finish one, I'll put up the link to the oneshot. And then, and then, you can read it, and comment on it.

If you can listen to the music, you should, so we can be on the same wavelength.

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~kbxshadow

]]> ~kbxshadow http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/19958979/ http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/19958979/ Thu, 14 Aug 2008 19:41:07 PDT
Well, actually, thanks to dealing with this shit for four days straight, it's come down to just my legs. Go figure. My calves, thighs, feet, ankles, shins, heels, everything on my legs (except for my knees, thank goodness) all fucking hurt.

Yes, I'm cursing more than normal; I know this fact, but I can't blame myself: I ACHE.

I try to climb up the stairs, nope, my legs refuse and I'm already breathless halfway up.

Okay, so here's the daily schedule for marching band rehearsals:

First: Fifteen-minute stretches.
Second: Two miles worth of running.
Third: While still breathless and still dying, 150 crunches and ten incredibly slow push-ups.
Fourth: Marching around in blazing dry heat.
Fifth: For each time someone messes up, ten push-ups in the dead dry, yet freshly sprinkled grass.
Sixth: Someone totally messes up and it's another half a mile of running.
Seventh: More marching in the blazing dry heat.
Eighth: Now we pick up instruments and more marching in the blazing dry heat.
Ninth: Now doing warm-up stretches for dancing.
Tenth: Jazz running and doing other sorts of weird ballet-style stuff.
Eleventh: Now doing jazz running other sorts of weird ballet-style stuff with instruments. Fun.
Twelfth: One hour's worth of lunchtime. THANK GOD.
Thirteenth: Fetch music stands, show music, and instruments, and go out to the quad. IN THE MIDDLE OF THE FUCKING BLAZING HEAT. But if we're lucky, we stand under the overhangs.
Fourteenth: Breathing exercises and warm-ups for music. Alias, suffocating and dying.
Fifteenth: Going through show music. Not so bad until the instructor makes us do push-ups or run to a building and back. Oh, and we're standing the whole fucking time. No sitting's allowed.
Sixteenth: Sectionals. See above.
Seventeenth: All-band rehearsal. Wouldn't be so bad if I weren't standing in the ONLY spot where there's ANY sunlight. And we're still standing.
Eighteenth: Put instruments down and do 90 crunches and run around all the hallways in the whole fucking school.
Nineteenth: Take stands and music back the band room.
Twentieth: Go home.

So if I seem a bit more irritable than normal, now you know why. I swear, they must be kicking us in our asses just for the hell of it. Truly and honestly.

Oh, and water breaks? Oh yeah, we get those! For like...five to ten seconds' worth of it, of course.

Bending my legs in any sort of fashion makes me want to scream in agony. Fucking a.

Luckily I was able to get like...ten hours of sleep last night, so it wasn't that bad today. My legs still hurt though. Fuck this shit.

But it totally becomes worth it once the field shows roll aroun...

Oh fuck, the shows. They're going to kick us in the ass even more to memorize the fucking show...Four different songs. Someone shoot me now.

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~kbxshadow

]]> ~kbxshadow http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/19680501/ http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/19680501/ Wed, 30 Jul 2008 12:42:47 PDT .

First, select your ten fictional characters (OC or not) by whichever method you like best. Then answer the questions below.

1. Marth (FE1, FE3, SSBM, SSBB)
2. Ike (FE9, FE10, SSBB)
3. Link (LoZ Series, SSB series)
4. Kevyn (OC)
5. Roy (FE6, SSBM)
6. Aliana (OC)
7. Mark (OC)
8. Soren (FE9, FE10)
9. Sonic (StH Series, SSBB)
10. Shadow (StH Series, SSBB)

~1. Divide the list up by even and odd. Which group of five would make a better Five Man Band? Who would you slot in each position: Leader, Lancer (second-in-command), Big Guy, Smart Guy, The Chick? If you think the team would be improved by swapping one character between the even and odd groups, which ones would you switch?


Group A (Even): Ike, Kevyn, Aliana, Soren, Shadow
Group B (Odd): Marth, Link, Roy, Mark, Sonic

I personally think Group B would do better in this case. Kev and Aliana would be getting on each other's nerves. >D

Group A:

Leader: Shadow
Lancer: Aliana
Big Guy: Ike
Smart Guy: Kevyn
Chick: Soren

Group B:

Leader: Sonic
Lancer: Roy
Big Guy: Link
Smart Guy: Mark
Chick: Marth

Funny how things work out.

~2. Gender-swap 2(Ike), 8(Soren) & 10(Shadow). Which character would have the most change in their story arc? Which the least? Would any of these characters have to have a complete personality change to be believable as the opposite sex?
-- Ike's story would probably change the most, and in fact, I'm pretty for sure Shinon would kill himself if Ike were female and took commandership of the Greil Mercenaries...I seem to think Ike would be a very meek person as a girl, probably because of how he really is as a man.
-- Em...Soren would probably change the least. He doesn't say much anyway...and...well...I think can explain the rest.

~3. Compare the matchups of 1(Marth) & 8(Soren) and 5(Roy) & 9(Sonic). (Ignore canon sexual preferences for the moment.) Which couple would be more compatible? Which couple would be more plausible to people from either principal's home culture?
-- *eye twitch* If I said Marth and Soren, I would be trounced and mauled to death by them Ike/Soren fans...but I really don't want to make Roy a freak by pairing him with a frickin' hedgehog, so I think Marth and Soren would do...
-- And neither of them would work.

~4. Your team is 3(Link), 4(Kevyn) & 9(Sonic). The mission consists of a social challenge, a mental challenge and a physical challenge. Which team member do you assign to each challenge?
-- Oh dear, make sure we have enough contraceptives for the first two. *shot*

Social Challange: Sonic
Mental Challange: Kevyn
Physical Challange: Link
-- If we put either Sonic or Link to the mental challenge, I don't think there would be much progress in either area, unless the mental challenge was some grand dungeon puzzle that Link could easily solve. And we never really have known Sonic to be all that smart. We all Sonic as the guy who's running around everywhere and meeting people and taking on new people and rivals...And Link's Link. If you've seen him with his shirt off, then you know.

~5. 7(Mark) becomes 1(Marth)'s boss for a week in some plausible fashion. How's their working relationship?
-- As long as Aliana's not involved, I think we're okay.


~6. 2(Ike) finds him/her/itself inserted into 6(Aliana)'s continuity. As far as anyone other than 2(Ike) or 6(Aliana) is concerned, they've always been there. What role would 2(Ike) be presumed to have had in 6(Aliana)'s story, and could they fit in without going wonky?
-- This one turned out kinda lame.
-- They're both Fire Emblem characters. What do you think?
-- Then again, I could more or less see these two arguing all the time...
-- Ike would just have to deal with Marth being his boss, or he could very well just quit being in Aliana's continuity or whatever.

~7. 3(Link) and 5(Roy) get three wishes. The catch is that they have to agree on all three wishes before they get the benefits of any of them. What three wishes would they ma... ]]> ~kbxshadow http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/19605287/ http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/19605287/ Sat, 26 Jul 2008 10:50:36 PDT
A lot of you might have heard of me going on about that tiny little island on which I was born. I'm not even a full citizen of Okinawa, and neither am I a full-blooded Okinawan, but I still steadfastedly hold on to that identity. It's one of my life's goals, you know, to go back to Okinawa again. Airfare and everything's too high-priced these days. I can't help it.

But that song...

I couldn't go to sleep last night, see? Too many things on my mind, which is very unnatural of me. When I go to sleep, I conk out in the next few minutes...If I'm comfortable enough. If I'm thinking about a bunch of things or if I'm not too comfortable, I stay up all night.

I was in my bed, I was comfortable enough, but I couldn't get to sleep 'cause I was thinking of too many things at once.

Then I remembered that I had left my iPod in the glovebox of the car. I went down to go get it.

I think I'm deeply connected with the sea. I love sitting at the beach and just listening to the roll and crash of the waves. I love staring out beyond the ocean horizon and seeing the reflection of the sun upon the water. In the daytime, the sun's a pretty white on the water, and if the water's nice and clean, it's a beautiful sight. Come sunset, the water turns gold and the sun's reflection is this wonderful bronze. And during the night time, the reflection of the moon on the water is just incredible.

So you see, I love the ocean. So much that I brought its sounds back home with me. A good hour or so of just ocean sounds is in my iPod.

I have those sounds categorized under a playlist called "Okinawan Instrumentals". And it's exactly that.

I turned my iPod on to those sounds and tried to go sleep. It didn't work. I still lay there with a bunch of thoughts flying around in my head. I felt sick.

So I unlocked the thing and went back up on the track listing to the very first one. In the Okinawan dialect, it reads "Shimanchu nu Takara." If you say that to a Japanese person, they'll look at you like dumb idiot. Say it in Okinawa, though, and people know you're talking about that song.

Although the one I have is a remixed version with more modern instruments playing, it still does have Okinawa's traditional "sanshin" in it. That's different from the "shamisen" of Japan, peoples. The "sanshin" has snake skin on it. xD And personally, I think it sounds a lot better.

So it is a song, but because it's an instrumental, there were no words, and that became the melody of the song.

I listened to it once in bed, and I felt a little better.

I listened to it one more time, and I felt so great that I started crying.

Crying's a good stress-reliever, apparently, if instilled by something other than oppression. That total blankness after you cry is a really nice feeling. It's almost as if the world stops for you and you kinda just sit there and think of nothing.

But through that song, I heard my island calling for me. Telling me that it was all going to be okay. Telling me that as long as I hold on to myself and be who I am, I'll be fine. I've only been there for the first two years of my life and two months of the ending of third grade, but it's so much like home to me, no matter how little of it I remember.

I saw the blue seas, those clear blue waters where you can see all the way down to the coral at the seafloor, the deep blue oceans where the waters are dyed a royal blue, and the shining brilliance of the waters as you stand upon the white sands of the beach.

The beaches are white because of the coral that washes up as sediment. The sands are very fine and very smooth, and once in a while, you can find pieces of coral washed up. It's such a refreshing feeling, you know, just sitting on the white sandy beach and watching purely clear blue water rolling and crashing nearby.

And the sky. Oh goodness, the sky. Mom went to Okinawa on her own last year, and the first thing she said when she came back to America was "I miss the sky of Okinawa." And I don't blame her. The skies are pure blue. It's a little darker than the Crayola shade of sky blue, but it's blue, not all light blue and unhealthy-looking as the skies are here. You look across the ocean horizon in broad daylight, and if the water were still, you wouldn't still the point where water met sky. It's that blue.

Without clouds, it's incredible.

But amidst all that blue, I also see a pinpoint of red. You know the hibiscus flower? That's pretty much the flo... ]]> ~kbxshadow http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/19592245/ http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/19592245/ Fri, 25 Jul 2008 14:32:57 PDT All along I was searching for my Lenore
In the words of Mr. Edgar Allan Poe
Now I'm sober and "Nevermore"
Will the Raven come to bother me at home

Calling you, calling you home
You...calling you, calling you home

By the door you said you had to go
Couldn't help me anymore
This I saw coming, long before
So I kept on staring out the window

Calling you, calling you home
You...calling you, calling you home

I am a natural entertainer, aren't we all
Holding pieces of dying ember
I'm just trying to remember who I can call
Who can I call

Home...calling you, calling you

I run a secret propaganda
Aren't we all hiding pieces of broken anger
I'm just trying to remember I can call
Can I call

Born in a war of opposite attraction
It isn't, or is it a natural conception
Torn by the arms of opposite directions
It isn't, or is it a Modernist reaction

Born in a war of opposite attraction
It isn't, or is it a natural conception
Torn by the arms of opposite directions
It isn't, or is it a Modernist reaction

Is it like this
Is it always the same
When a heartache begins, is it like this
Do you like this
Is it always the same
Will you come back again
Do you like this
Is it always the same
Will you come back again
Do you like this
Do you like this
Is it like this
Is it always the same
If you change your phone number, will you tell me
Is it like this
It it always the same
When a heartache begins, is it like this
If you like this
Will you remember my name
Will you play it again, if you like this

For the pretenses of my still insecure nature, this song just seemed so perfect. The ending sort of...questioning, insecure, denying list of questions is really all that's going on.

Remember how I said I didn't believe anyone whenever they said something of complimenting nature to me? I think that was yesterday's journal entry when I said something like that.

I might know why I feel that way. It's kinda simple. It came from my earlier childhood.

You know, all these years, and probably up until about six years ago, starting from when I first ever started school, it's been nothing but derogatory comments thrown at me everywhere.

I've been told I was bossy.

I've been accused of cheating on people.

I've been scapegoated.

I've been teased.

I've been told I was the most horrible person alive.

Problem is, in my sort of childish innocence and sensitivity back then, I swallowed everything they threw at me. Perhaps it was mainly because of the fact that me and my father didn't have much of a relationship back then either.

A bunch of the things he said to me I think I swallowed and spit it back up at people. So I really can't blame anyone.

I've been trying to fix things once I realized that some of the things I say were on the account of him. And most of the time, feeling miserable and failing hopelessly.

I kind of see a shadow of that lonely kid every now and then. Like last night. It was a weird dream. I was chasing after someone, and I was calling for that person. She was dressed in all black and seemed to be same age as me. And for the whole dream, I was calling for her, she was running away from me, and when I woke up, I was crying.

No one in my family knows that I had this dream.

But I kinda know what it meant. Because I do remember whose name it was I calling.

And let me tell the truth. I'm kinda scared to know what's going to happen. If this dream is some sort of prophetic thing, then I'm not going to be much of a happy person for a little while.

I think, little by little, I'll be losing a friend. And I'll tell the truth. I'm really scared. But I can't stop anyone from doing anything of their choice.

It might be my more, sort of, pessimistic side talking.

I really want it to rain.

On a sort of lighter note, this side of the family I'm with right now really wants to get away from this area we're in. We think moving down south after my junior year sounds nice...And mom seems really serious about it.

But that's an aside, I guess that I just wanted to get out before I moved on again.

I won't talk for long. Since all I'm going to do is whine again. And that little shadow of myself is just staring at me again. Waiting for me to make my mistake again. Waiting for me to hurt someone again. I don't think it'll need to wait for much longer.

But before I go, I just want to leave a quick little message.

I'm still here, if you need me, I'll always be here, anytime you need me. I only hope... ]]> ~kbxshadow http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/19572959/ http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/19572959/ Thu, 24 Jul 2008 12:48:37 PDT
Feel free to bet a few Smash Coins on if I'm going to be insecure enough to write another rambling journal tomorrow.

So I have an eye appointment to go to today. Huzzah. Just for a checkup to see if my eyes aren't dying from wearing these contact lenses. Honestly, I was only prescribed to come in to the eye doctor once every two years. Which, of course, had me quite mad when I first found out about this, 'cause back when I found out, that was when my eyesight was starting to get bad.

Luckily, and it might be thanks to both contact lenses and teenage growing or whatever, my eyes have finally stabilized at -2.50. I don't know what number over 20 that is; could someone tell me? Oh well.

That means all I have to do to get laser surgery is to turn 21 or something a little older than that so that my body will have stopped growing and my cornea will have stopped shifting so they could make this permanent change to my eyes.

Actually, I don't want laser surgery. They force your eye open and keep your eye open and they cut into your cornea and...yeesh...*shudder* I'm okay without that. I'm perfectly fine with glasses and contact lenses.

Heh, now that I think about it, I remember when I first got contact lenses. It took me fifteen minutes to get them in. How sad is that? But it's okay now. I can get them in my eyes in less than ten seconds. I think.

And somehow that reminds me of my excursions over in Baltimore. So everyone who knows Baltimore knows Harborplace, right? Well, some half an hour away is Fells Point.

Remember that TV series? "Homicide"? Yeah, we got to see the building where they filmed that series. Oh, and we saw the pubs they used for it too. It was pretty cool. I feel quite accomplished.

An amazing thought coming from the insecure one.

I'm actually not too sure how my biorhythm works, really. I'll be feeling really good one day, and then the next I'll be feeling quite down and depressed. I must have a really thick shell or well-founded demeanor, 'cause the only thing most people can see about me is some cold sarcastic outlook thing.

So yeah, intarwebz pplz, this more happy-go-lucky kbx isn't the real kbx. At all. Okay, so sometimes I might be, you know, like this, always happy and everything, but that usually doesn't occur unless I'm on a natural high or...I dunno, just some special occasion.

I'm really the silent brooding type who seems to be reflecting on her own little dark world at any chance I can get. I'm easily amused, but sometimes I just kinda lose sense of what the hell's going on.

Oops, I cursed.

Ah, well, it's not the first time. I think it's starting to tone down a little though. Must mean I'm a bit more mature.

Not.

Let's face it, I am kinda weak at heart. People do tell me that I'm actually a really strong person, but all I can do is stare at them and give them my infamous "wtf" look. 'Cause it really isn't true, you know? Come on, I fell into depression for a good week, and my local peeps know about this pretty much 'cause I missed a day of school on the account of "emotional breakdown" and came back the next day ranting and screaming about what had happened!

Tell me that's not a weak core, will you? In fact, I dare you.

Forgive me, I seem to be ranting to the whole world right now. Life hasn't been treating me too well.

But can I go on, please? Obviously I won't be able to see my counselor anytime soon and mom's not around to hear me out, so I don't really have another outlet.

Listen, it almost seems like I'm so weak, and it also seems like I've built up this fake demeanor so much that I'm living up to my demeanor, but try too hard to do it. I go around and tell everyone "Hey, it's okay to talk to me, I'm always here in case you need to talk!" but the problem is, as much as I can listen - I know how to listen to people - I can't help anyone.

And it sucks, 'cause I know I don't have the capacity to heal anyone - 'cause I sure ain't healed myself - but I really want to help others out. I really, you know, want people to see that life's not so bad if they could just hold confidence in theirselves.

It's lame, 'cause I tell everyone the same thing. Love yourself. Hold confidence in yourself. You are you, other people are other people. Only you can love yourself for what you truly are. It's pretty much what I preach if I were a preacher. Once you learn to love yourself without narcissism, and once you learn to love your own soul, you can love other people. ~kbxshadow http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/19562367/ http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/19562367/ Wed, 23 Jul 2008 20:29:42 PDT
So I've gotten back into video games. Kind of. I've mostly been playing Radiant Dawn and Zero Gravity as of late. You know, I seem to be the person who really likes those underestimated games out there. I didn't really find any good reviews for Radiant Dawn and Sonic Riders: Zero Gravity just didn't get as much popularity as I think it should have. I think.

But oh well. Radiant Dawn's going pretty well, I guess, though I have to say, compared to you super good people out there, I suck at this game. Luckily I have to help me out with all the extra stuff and everything. She's my Fire Emblem expert. Haha.

Anyway, I digress. I'm glad I decided to try and finish Radiant Dawn before I got anywhere near writing up Ike's solo chapter for TSBW. 'Cause now I might have Yune show up instead of Ashera. As pretty as Ashera is, too much order can be a cause of catastrophe, you know? Well, we'll see once I finish the game.

And speaking of Ashera, no offense to people who do have it, I think she has OCD or something. I mean, honestly, everything has to be all strict and orderly and well...orderly. So much that in order to restore order to warring Tellius, she decided to turn everyone but the "Chosen Ones" into stone.

Okay, and what's up with the whole Chosen One thing? It wasn't like as if Yune could do anything, right, since she was locked up in the Fire Emblem and everything? So Ashera chose Ike, Micaiah, Ranulf, Skrimir, and all those other people so that they could come and beat her down? I'm utterly confused, but don't spoil anything for me; I'll get around to finishing that game, so no worries.

Oh, and Zero Gravity. Honestly, if you've played Sonic Riders and got good at it, Zero Gravity's a breeze if you read the manual. I'm particularly fond of racing games, so the first Sonic Riders was really good for me. Sure the controls were really weird for the first Sonic Riders and it's pretty hard when you start out, but once you get the gist of everything and find the shortcuts, it's all good.

Same thing goes with Zero Gravity. Honestly, I think it's a bit smoother than the first Sonic Riders game, and the whole Gravity Control thing is just plain awesome. And it wasn't like those weirdo sequels where they carry everything from the first game over to the second one. No, no, no. There's no Air system you have to worry about in Zero Gravity, so that was a relief for me.

Instead they have this whole thing called Gravity Points, where you're bound to get if you keep doing these really simple tricks. Well, at least on the Wii Remote held sideways, it's easy. Just tilt in the direction you want the character to do your trick and hit the 2 button just as you get off the ramp.

Oh, and Gravity Dive and Meteor Burst. It's great. Scores you first place every time you use it, if you're good. I screw up sometimes, so I'm not sure what to say.

And speaking of not being sure of what to say, I'm not sure what to say of any of my fics. It's not that I'm lazy. Let me put it plainly.

I'm losing inspiration...

Yeah, I really think I'm an impatient hypocritical little brat, but I can't help it. Peeps need to update.

At least I'm not on total hiatus or anything. I'm working on my entry for 's Fantasy Series contest. It's pretty good so far, I think, for a first draft. If I could just get everything accurate, I might have a slight chance.

I'm getting stuff down for TSBW, don't you worry, though I'm afraid I won't be done with this fic even after I graduate college. Heck, I might be all the way into my career and everything, and I'll still be writing fanfiction. Go me.

Hey, and speaking of writing, I might want to start a freelance writing business or whatever. You know, people ask me to write something for them and pay me to do it kind of thing. I won't be too overly expensive 'cause it would be a sort of prototype thing, but it does sound fun. I do wish were here to help me out on that, since I don't have the s... ]]> ~kbxshadow http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/19392944/ http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/19392944/ Mon, 14 Jul 2008 14:56:47 PDT and . xD Because I'm a pirate that way.

You have a:
[x] Mother
[x] Father
[ ] Step-Father
[ ] Step-Mother
[ ] Step-Sister
[ ] Step-Brother
[ ] Brother
[x] Sister
[ ] Nephew
[ ] Niece
[x] Cell phone
[ ] Own bathroom
[ ] Own room
[ ] Swimming pool
[ ] Hot tub
[ ] Guest room
[x] TV
total so far: 5

[ ] Fullsize or bigger bed
[x] More than 8 pairs of shoes
[x] Sunglasses
[x] Watch
[x] MP3 Player/iPod that works.
[x] PS2 that works
[x] Xbox that works
[x] Nintendo DS or PSP that works
[x] Gameboy/ Advance
[x] Gamecube
total: 14

[ ] Basketball hoop
[ ] Air hockey table
[ ] Pool table
[ ] Ping pong table
[ ] Fooseball table
total: 14

[x] Nightstand
[x] Stereo in bedroom
[x] DVD player in bedroom
total: 17

[ ] Job
[ ] Goes shopping at least once a week
[ ] Expensive cologne/perfume
[x] AIM/MSN
[x] Camera or phone
total: 19


[ ] Electric or gas scooter/motorcycle/car
[ ] Guitar/Drums/Bass guitar
[ ] Piano/Keyboard
[x] Any other instrument
[ ] Been on a cruise
[x] Traveled out of the province/state
[ ] Had a personal trainer
[x] Expensive jewelery
[ ] Met a celebrity
total: 22

[x] Straightener/curling iron
[x] Have been to a batting cage
[x] Have $100 on you right now
[x] Credit card or atm card or debit card or bank card
[ ] Been to Europe
[x] Been to NYC
[x] Been to LA
[x] Been to Florida
[ ] Been to Las Vegas
[ ] Been to the Bahamas
[ ] Been to South America
total: 29

[x] Parents have a car
[ ] Jet Ski/boat
[ ] Camper
[x] Been to 5+ states in the US
[ ] 100+ buddies on facebook/myspace
total: 31

[x] Home-cooked meal almost every day
[ ] Been in a limo
[x] Been in a helicopter
[x] own a digital camera
[x] Own a laptop
total: 35

1-22 = Ghetto
23-33 = Average kid
34-44 = Spoiled
45+ = Upper Class snob

AHAHAHAHAHA!!! I'M SPOILED!!

Well, it's not like as if I didn't already know.

]]> ~kbxshadow http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/19316311/ http://kbxshadow.deviantart.com/journal/19316311/ Thu, 10 Jul 2008 18:33:27 PDT To my dear hostess kbxshadow:

At the insistence of my companions Common Sense and Judgement, I decided to directly relate to you the various things about you that bother me at the moment. Let me enumerate, and before this becomes a long essay, I'll stick with you as a writer.

1. Face it. You're a fangirl. That's why you write fanfiction. That's why you created a character for Marth, even though in all reality, he had a childhood friend AND already has a girlfriend, who he eventually MARRIES when he's 21!

2. Stop. Changing. Kevyn's. Appearance. All. The. Freaking. Time. She was your persona at first, and now she's pretty much an OC! Oh, and let me guess, you thought of reasons why you changed her appearance twice? Right? Just quit it.

3. Get your ass BACK to TSBW, you procrastinating little dog! You discontinued TYiOHS 'cause you wanted to refocus on TSBW and work on your other stuff more, right? WELL WHY DON'T YOU DO EXACTLY WHAT YOU PLANNED TO DO, HUH?!

4. And speaking of TYiOHS, QUIT LYING TO YOURSELF AND EVERYONE ELSE, AND TELL THE DAMN TRUTH. You stopped writing TYiOHS 'cause you DISCOURAGED by the fact that the relationship between Marth and Sheeda actually worked out, AND that Aliana and Mark have absolutely NO PLACE anywhere in the Marth's story! GET OVER IT.

5. Oh, and you better start accepting the new ways of spelling out "Akanea" and "Sheeda" and other such Altean words. It's "AKANEIA" and "SHEIDA.

6. My complaining knows no bounds, does it? Did I mention anything about your Legend of Zelda fic? Nope, I didn't. STOP COMPLAINING ABOUT IT. Obviously, if there's NO REVIEWS, it's not WORTHY of ANY REVIEWS! It's simple ROCKET SCIENCE, okay?

7. Your theories on the Fierce Deity are all whack. Meaning, your idea for Light's Blood is also whack.

8. You need to come up with some original ideas, girl. TSBW was the result of someone's suggestion, and TYiOHS was because you saw a couple of other people making the 100 Theme Challenge into a story.

9. I laugh in your face EVERY TIME you say you twitch at the thought of yaoi pairings! Just like before, STOP LYING TO YOURSELF. You DID, after all, try to have a slight relationship between Marth and Mark OR MARIC in TYiOHS! Had you gone that far, I swear I would have VANQUISHED MYSELF FROM YOUR BRAIN.

10. Oh, and your fics? THEY NEED WORK. Have you ever SEEN what has happened to TSBW ever since you first started that damned fic?! How about Eight of Devastation? And whatever the hell you have planned for Light's Blood? Face it, kbx, YOU CAN'T WRITE LIKE YOU THINK YOU CAN. How do you think those people you believe are so good can write so well, hm? IT'S BECAUSE THEY PRACTICE. IT'S BECAUSE THEY ACTUALLY GO INTO DEPTH WITH THEIR DETAILS AND CHARACTERS TO BRING OUT THEIR TRUE POTENTIAL! And you wonder why you can't seem to do that yourself, right? Wow, kbx. Just wow.

Maybe I should have Common Sense yell at you a little bit, hm? That sounds like a sound idea! Now, no more complaining, and face each of these ten things or else you'll never grow as a writer!

Grudgingly Yours,
Conscience

Dear Conscience,

I don't give a crap about what you have to say.

Give me better advice about life, not my writing.

~kbxshadow

My conscience had a lot to say, didn't it? Haha!


~kbxshadow

PS: I'm not hungry.

]]> ~kbxshadow