http://search.deviantart.com/?q=by:losersrule&section=today deviantART RSS for by:losersrule en-us Copyright 2009, deviantART.com Fri, 04 Dec 2009 09:59:45 PST deviantART.com http://blogs.law.harvard.edu/tech/rss http://s.deviantart.com/minish/widgets/apple-touch-icon-precomposed.png http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/20968362/ http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/20968362/ Mon, 13 Oct 2008 11:29:12 PDT
Just in case anyone didn't know.

And I don't want to go home.


Ever.

]]> ~losersrule http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/14597846/ http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/14597846/ Wed, 12 Sep 2007 00:11:25 PDT
The 1st player of this "game" starts with the topic "6 weird habits/facts/dislikes about yourself" and people who get tagged must write in their journals about their 6 weird habits/facts/dislikes as well as state this rule clearly.

In the end, you need to choose the next 6 people to be tagged and list their names..

1. half my toenails are still painted blue from my birthday. but which half i hear you ask? well, thats far too intimate for me to disclose on here...

2. i cant wink with my right eye

3. i have a habit of touching my pen to my chin in between writing the answers to legal studies questions. yes, only legal studies. dont ask why, i have no idea. it infuriates me!

4. my middle name is gladys. no, not really, but how funny would it be.

5. im mildly obsessive compulsive. i get it from my mother. i hoard stuff. as in, i still have tickets to socials i went to in yr 7 and paddlepop sticks from when i was in primary school.

6. i got 4 cows for my 18th birthday. dont ask me about it. it makes me angry.


friends: Hans, Fredrick, Myrtle, Niamh, Karoline and Tracy

]]> ~losersrule http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/13867876/ http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/13867876/ Wed, 25 Jul 2007 00:09:04 PDT They just remind me of your shining bright eyes
I'm missing your voice at night time
This sepa-separation seem-seems a sad crime

B-b-b-but don't don't don't think think think I forgot you you you
Are are are oh so sweet I I I - I knew

I knew if only you were here
Things would be more magical

If I was there
Right now would be more radical

You're so not near
I'm wishing I could place a call

And feel closer to you ooo-ooo

Miles of air and road and land
Separate me from all my plans
We're havin' havin' havin' havin' fun
But something something tells me I miss someone

B-but I hope hope hope you didn't forget me I couldn't
Forget you the whole time I always knew I knew

Say that you're into me, let me know how it will be
If you don't know just say so
I'll wait till the perfect time think of all the perfect lines
I'll make sure if I let you know

We've got movies on our list to see
Things to do just you and me
Calls to make from here to there and back
We've got fun to have and days to spend
Stars to see or just pretend
At least for now just keep things right on track

]]> ~losersrule http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/13297841/ http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/13297841/ Mon, 11 Jun 2007 01:37:40 PDT
so to make up for it, i present you with my horoscope for tomorrow:

"Take the helm and chart a new course when it comes to love! It's true that there are a lot of fish in the sea, but you may need to find some fresh waters and even different bait."




...ouch?

]]> ~losersrule http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/13247581/ http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/13247581/ Thu, 07 Jun 2007 03:25:52 PDT



Karma's a bitch.

]]> ~losersrule http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/13096547/ http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/13096547/ Sat, 26 May 2007 04:08:17 PDT


my shoes are very thin

i have a little pocket


to put a penny in
haven't got a penny




a ha' penny will do

haven't got a ha' penny


then god bless you

]]> ~losersrule http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/12686220/ http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/12686220/ Sun, 22 Apr 2007 02:27:58 PDT
the seventh and final harry potter book is released

a yogathon (i kid you not) is being held in vancouver. crazy canadians

the 2007 WordCamp is being held in California. crazy americans

'Year of Desolation' (apparently a hard metal [is that even a genre??] or something band) is playing in Oakland, california

a gay pride march is being held in lincoln, lincolnshire (of course!)

belgium is moving to new york for a beer advocate... thing... [why am i not in america for my birthday, it seems thats where all the fun stuff is happening... *sigh*]

the oxford truck festival is on in... oxford. tickets only £55. not THATS more like it!! far more my style!

and john mayer is playing at (wait for it)... the Hersheypark stadium, hershey (america, duh). but its ok, theres no hidden fees!! whooo!!


thats all... i was just bored.



]]> ~losersrule http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/12318092/ http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/12318092/ Sun, 25 Mar 2007 03:50:03 PDT

interesting

]]> ~losersrule http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/11455368/ http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/11455368/ Tue, 16 Jan 2007 02:39:32 PST not a lot to say except to tell you that i intend to depart from this wonderful community in the next couple of weeks.
im taking my last year of school really seriously, and i know that this will only be a distraction to me. this and my other internet fads.
no doubt ill be back, when my powers of self discipline wane as they so often do, but i honestly hope i can stop myself doing so until i am finished. (thats not that far away. WOOT!)
to those of you who i only really keep in contact with on here, dont hesitate to email me or call me or visit me; any other form of distraction is entirely welcome at any time! ill miss it, but its not like iv been contributing for a long time anyway, so its no great loss to the wider community.
im going to try my hardest to obtain 5,000 pageviews before i sign off (egotistical bastard me) so i may submit some crap to get you to look at my page... same old same old really huh.
so, much love, peace to the llamas, and ill see you around.
xo

]]> ~losersrule http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/11281831/ http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/11281831/ Mon, 01 Jan 2007 22:13:16 PST [link] for more info.

I appologise to those people I have already posted a message to them about this, but I think it's an opportunity which shouldn't be missed.

Go you good things!!


oh, and also; when someone is in the city next, can you please go toLingham Lane (its off Flinder's lane between swanston and elizabeth) and stand in the glowing ring? no, this is not an alien invasion, although... *plots*
unfortunately im not going to be back in the city these hols, in fact, probably ever if this school thing eats me like im predicting, and i really want to experience the "ring" even thru someone else. please?

actually, i made that sound kinda scary, but im assured its not. let me know how it goes will you?
cheers

]]> ~losersrule http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/11203494/ http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/11203494/ Tue, 26 Dec 2006 17:29:48 PST
• Name: Emma Bush [additional text by Maddie] is a fat transvestite with really bad eggs.
• Know allergies (if any): [additional text by Maddie] alcohollies, lollies, smurfs.
• Medications (if any): [additional text by Maddie] midgets.
• “THE SCHOOL BADGE” [additional text by Angus] is a lot of letters away from penis.
• Angus: Was Jesus breast fed?
• Angus: Banana- the closest thing to not being a fruit, but is.
• Angus: The church- I can’t believe it’s not Buddha.
• Angus: Être, ou ne pas être. (Translation: to be or not to be. In French.) Or, if you’re as cool as me, you can say “to be or not to be, that is the question” in French and Japanese at the same time: Être, ou ne pas être, それ が もんだい. Whoo!
• Angus: Never put your money where your mouth is, you might catch rabies.
• Angus: Only shallow people don’t judge by appearances.
• “GUNS ARE NOT ALLOWED TO BE LEFT IN GROUP ROOMS.”
• Quentin: I am what I am. (hey, it’s deep for a Frenchy! )
• Quentin: Hi. How are you? I have just two day now it’s so sad but I don’t have the choice! I come back in France little France for see all of my friend I hope you don’t forget me went I’m in France and you send me a lot of email!!!... I would like stay in Australia do you sink it’s possible or no? I think no I hope my English is better now for speak on msn with you… (and a all student here maybe)
Now I think your country is very cool and cold in winter do you think to? I think I have finish to ritting now
bye see you later maybe the Frenchy kiss
• Mr Collins: “I’ve been to a few meetings where the skirt’s come up.”
• Mr Duncan: “What does a graph require?”
Angus: “Graph paper?”
• Mrs Jacka: “She was on her death row. I mean, death bed.”
• [additional text by Quentin] Emma laugh in class. [signature that’s supposed to look like a teacher…]
• ЗmΔ- Emma in phonetics
• I’ve been careless, I lost my tenderness
• Angus: LA DA DI DA DA DOO DI DA DI DIP DING DI DI DOP DAG DANK DA DA DI DIE DO DIE DAY DONG DO DA DONG DANG DO DA DA DI DA. 
• Abbey Minter: “What, do you want her to get fat???”
• 9-3-06: Jules and Bella’s 4 year anniversary.
• I wish I’d been a girlie, just like my dear papa.
• ODD SPOT: A Croatian lumberjack has sued his health authority since receiving a female kidney. He says it has turned him off drinking with his mates and complains: “I have developed a passion for female jobs like ironing, sewing, washing dishes, sorting clothes in wardrobes and even knitting.”
• Website of the week: [link]
• Kate: “‘Ya mum’ jokes are so old right now.”
Thom: “Ya mum’s so old right now.”
• All my friends are fuck ups, but they’re fun to have around.
• Angus: And so the second eggplant said… “Drew.”
• “Whales sit at the very top of the seafood chain. They can have all the lobster, caviar and salmon they like. So what do they eat? Plankton.”
• Mr Duncan: “Shut up girls!”
Angus: “But it wasn’t me!”
• “I don’t know… I feel lonely, tired, anxious, distracted…” “You may be suffering from parenthood…”
• We conglomerate here today to partake in the agglutination of Maddie and Pat.
• Stop pretending what you mean isn’t what you say.
• “One of the 12 cartoonists, speaking anonymously, told Danish radio that ‘one of my thoughts by saying yes to the job was a wish to open up a dialogue’ with Muslims in Denmark. When I sit down to a discussion with someone, I’m not in the habit of spitting in their face… first.” – Maher Mughrabi, The Age
• A wedge of swans.
• “Sleep; death’s counterfeit.”
• Mawrgan: “You look like a dying corpse!”
• “Who could refrain that had a heart to love, and in that heart, courage to make’s love known.”
• Maddie: “Emma, if you were black, would you still be pale?”
• Mon 24th Apr: Pete Murray and the Stonemasons.
• Kris: “Survivor: Nuclear Island.”
• Sarah Heath: “No offence, but that’s just retarded!”
• Me: “I want to do work.”
Mads: “… you’re playing tetris!”
Me: “No I’m not… ergh…”
• Me: “Anyone would think I was blonde under all this hair.”
• Me: “Maybe Mary woke up one Christmas morning, and Jesus was in her stocking.”
Mads: “Emma, there was no Christmas before Jesus was born!”
• Me: “This bus driver looks like the Grandfather.”
Mads: “…don’t you mean the Godfather??”
• 28-5-06: Mawrgan and Jon started ‘sparking.’
• Angus: “I warn you, I smell like sausage rolls…”
• Courtney: “I did wonder why he wasn’t getting a head job.”
• A charm of finches.
• Angus: “I’m mass debating with myself. I’ve never mass debated bef... ]]> ~losersrule http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/10597992/ http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/10597992/ Thu, 02 Nov 2006 20:36:07 PST :thumb42411595:
*polite murmuring of greetings by all*
here's to a long healthy relationship! *chink chink*

yeah, so i was trying to be all cool and put a thumbnail pic of him in... but thats only for subscribers. humph. hes in my scraps if you want to see what he looks like. god knows what else is in there, so blindfold yourself if needs be. dont say i didnt warn you. this acts as a disclaimer!

actually, considering my luck with pets, i dont think he stands a chance...
first there was the baby bunny rabbit our dog caught... i think it died from fright. i cant imagine why, i mean, its not like its that scary being in a dog's mouth!
then there was harry, my first cat. he ran away after about a yr... ie he died.
then there was TC my second cat, and he got run over about a month after i got him.
then there was boris, my aloe vera and he died from over watering about 4 months after i got him... and aparently aloe vera is really hard to kill, so i must be doing something right. (yes, plants are pets too, dont discriminate!)

oh, and then theres my horse, which iv had for nearly 5 years, and im expecting her to drop any day now. (i seriously hope i havnt jinxed her now...)

and now theres Cooper.

inventive name i know, considering i got him from mr cooper, my chem teacher. but i kinda like it as a first name.

and yes, i am well aware that it is kinda weird to have a pet given to me by a 60-something male chem teacher, let alone name it after him. what can i say... its love.

lol.

just before i took this pic, he was singing to the opera on my classic fm cd... (the fish that is... not my chem teacher!) i swear his mouth was moving at the same time and all!! hes so talented!


so thats the news as it happens, live from the fish bowl
emma bush, signing out.

]]> ~losersrule http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/10470758/ http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/10470758/ Sat, 21 Oct 2006 22:56:14 PDT i have a condition.
its called BMH and affects the brain.
It's not life threatening, but can be detremental (no pun intended) to everyday activity.



yeah yeah ok, ill stop joking around now. its called Blonde Moments in the Head condition, and it goes like this:

i'm sitting there, happily minding my own business, procrastinating from doing homework (as i have been all weekend) thinking about my friend's party which is coming up, and how nice it was of my mum to say shed drop me off and pick me up what ever time i wanted, and how i would get around the problem of possibly being a tad intoxicated when she came to pick me up, and i thought, i could just fall asleep, and so my mind creates a scene where i climb into the car and say *yawn* "i am soo drunk!"... silence... "and by drunk i mean tired..."

DAMMIT!!!

i had another one the other day, which i have forgotten, mads might remember. *sigh* see! it takes over my life!!

and now, to turn the laughter from my misfortune to someone elses:

Physics: discussing electricity-
Teacher: "so what goes into the toaster?"
Mawrgan: "toast?"
*laughter*
Angus: "um... i think you'll find it's bread..."



ok... so maybe it was a be there thing... *sigh*... going now...

]]> ~losersrule http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/10413501/ http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/10413501/ Mon, 16 Oct 2006 14:51:16 PDT
no turning back now.

i feel like i need to throw up.

]]> ~losersrule http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/10316265/ http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/10316265/ Sat, 07 Oct 2006 16:08:14 PDT
i had an amazing week on camp, the kids were (mostly) awesome, sam and kobi were heaps of fun (tho poor kobi had to go home sick) and i finally won a game of uno... what more could you want?

i made some great friends and had an awesome time doing so.
im really sad that thats my last camp ever. *tear* but im glad it was with the people it was.


in other news: down to single digit days until my monologue exam. im going thru periods of major stress and then no stress, then major major stress etc etc etc. ill just be glad when its over.

my darling steph is having her 18th soon, and im soooo pumped (ok, so its what, a month away... shhh!!) got my skanky outfit all planned... well.. the top anyway i just want to go dancing, ARGH!! impatient me.

anyway, i should really be doing the school work i missed this week, or be practising my monologue, or be practising my flute coz im performing with my teacher today, YAY!! i love my flute!

]]> ~losersrule http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/10208701/ http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/10208701/ Wed, 27 Sep 2006 20:49:12 PDT
maybe its a trick of light


happy?

]]> ~losersrule http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/10024423/ http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/10024423/ Sun, 10 Sep 2006 04:46:46 PDT ~losersrule http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/9891501/ http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/9891501/ Tue, 29 Aug 2006 01:38:58 PDT me to stop singing *grumbles inaudibly to self*

coz they don't know you like i know you slim, no one does!

for anyone who is interested, i saw the chardiologist on the weekend. theres absolutely nothing wrong with me.

so after a few expensive (and occasionally embarrasing) trips to doctors and pathologists and a terribly nice chardiologist (i never thought id be comfortable naked from the waist up in a room with a man whos married with kids... just goes to show), im fine and dandy. woot.

blood donating here i come.

you just try and stop me. ]]> ~losersrule http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/9867516/ http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/9867516/ Sat, 26 Aug 2006 22:37:00 PDT
"Baby, It's Fact"

Just in case their wondering
They've got us pinned terribly
They don't believe our love is real
Cause they don't know how real love feels
You should know it's true
Just now, the part about my love for you
And how my hearts about bust
Into a thousand pieces
Oh it must be true
And They'll believe us to soon
Baby, it's fact
That our love is true
The way black is black
And blue is just blue
My love is true
It's a matter of fact
Oh, and you love me too
It's a simple as that
Baby, our love is true

They may say some awful things
But there's no point in listening
Your words are the only words
That I believe in after.
You should know it's true
Just now, the part about my love for you
And how my hearts about bust
Into a thousand pieces
Oh it must be true
And They'll believe us to soon
Baby, it's fact
That our love is true
The way black is black
And blue is just blue
My love is true
It's a matter of fact
Oh, and you love me too
It's a simple as that
Baby, our love is true ]]> ~losersrule http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/9856878/ http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/9856878/ Fri, 25 Aug 2006 23:59:58 PDT
one email in particular always sticks in my mind (possibly due to a refence of fire), and i decided to share it with you.



hey, how are u? how've ur hols been? did u block me? sorry, stupid question. Remember the first time I flirted with u (sorry, I'm a man of the past) I still think it's true; I like u again. God help me, I just thought that if I got it out of my system it'll help me stop. It may be my fault, or maybe it's urs......why are u so beatiful?

I was looking in a flame today (power died), and I thought of u; that's why I'm here now. How ur so pretty amongst the dark, yet so deadly if u touch it. It's either that or ur red hair.

missing u more than anything, Jules



lol, oh dear. do i remind anyone else of fire??? youll notice i didnt put up an email that mentioned anything id said, as i was just as bad as him, ie "i love you, your the only one for me, blah blah blah." i think we finally broke up 'permanently' because he got my birthday wrong... lol

but what makes me smile most is the fact that im still friends with this guy (not that i deserve it, publishing his heartfelt emails on my DA) and i even caught up with him at a party a few months back, and had a dance with him. was good to see him.

im glad we keep in touch. ]]> ~losersrule http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/9799992/ http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/9799992/ Mon, 21 Aug 2006 03:13:15 PDT ~losersrule http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/9779238/ http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/9779238/ Sat, 19 Aug 2006 05:27:57 PDT lol, only bothered to read the Famine booklet last night and saw the "do not skip food if you have a heart problem" i freaked for a bit then thought, stuff it. i did it last yr and im technically no different to last year, so ill be right.

so hungry...

AAR CONCERT TOMORROW!!! wheeeeeeeeeeeeeee!! so excited!!! cant wait.

my darling quentin leaves on tues, so i may never see him again, as we have monday off. he is such a sweetie and iv really enjoyed him being here. i miss him terribly. (not that id tell him that )

also my good friends Kanayo and Yuiri have left, and i think they fly out on tues as well. was a very teary afair saying good bye to them, as it always is when the jap girls leave.

thats all i can be bothered writing for now. not a whole lot going on anyway. i think ill go and watch some more episodes of Coupling... wheeee.

night all! xoxox ]]> ~losersrule http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/9658207/ http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/9658207/ Wed, 09 Aug 2006 02:14:16 PDT
as you can maybe tell, my whole attitude towards this has changed somewhat since my doc appointment. its not such a big thing. if theres something wrong theres something wrong. for now i can live with the belief theres nothing wrong. (ok, well apart from the fact that the wires keep itching me, which is a pretty good reminder, but shhh). now i just have to work out how i sleep with this thing on... ergh.

in my other daily news, i have done no homework. a day off school and not a thing done. oops.

but saying that, im not too sad (lol) coz we are having tempura for dinner (ie. seafood and vegetables in japanese batter.... yummmmmmm!)

hope you are all well and not at all itchy, coz it SUCKS! ]]> ~losersrule http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/9635681/ http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/9635681/ Tue, 08 Aug 2006 00:15:56 PDT
after being in this relationship for almost 18 months, i have seen the first signs of demise.

its like he's changed, all of a sudden. he doesnt even look the same anymore. i just dont know what to do. i feel like i dont know how to press his buttons any more, and that scares me.

sure, wev had our troubles; i think other girls write to him a lot, i feel i do all the comunicating, hes always so grey and dull and sometimes he just isnt available for me, but i love him.

there you go, i said it. i love DA. he is my one. my only.





yeah... a tad scared by the new look DA... freakin' out man!!



p.s. hippy birthday to darling madsy-poos. 17!! yay! ]]> ~losersrule http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/9614037/ http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/9614037/ Sun, 06 Aug 2006 03:32:47 PDT [link] please go now.


[updates] heart is ok... im just overly concious of it beating especially when i run. hasnt stopped me yet tho. tests start wednesday. ]]> ~losersrule http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/9594029/ http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/9594029/ Fri, 04 Aug 2006 03:24:58 PDT
if i were to die young, i would want that played at my funeral.


simply coz my dad would hate it!! lol...

not that i plan on dying.
nor having a funeral were i to do so.


having an up day.
this is good.


a certain person *cough selwyn cough*'s email is refusing to allow me to reply to it for some reason, so i blabber to you in the hope that when i return it shall have fixed itself.

yes i live by the theory that if you leave something for long enough it will fix itself.

i mean, thats how all the dishes get done, isnt it?


i have a few quotes for you... if you chose to accept them. if not i shall have to send them to therapy, so please be kind.

Mr Dettbarn- physics teacher. on the topic of movement: "So, how fast will it be going?"
David- ultrabrain on all things except society: "How fast is a piece of string?"


Maddi- to someone in our maths class: "tell the french guy that emma and i are lesbians, but that its a secret"
Me: "yeah, we havnt come out of the cupboard yet... i mean the closet"


Thom- pushing me: "watch out for the pole!"
Me- "no, that one's a norwegian!"
... ha. ha. ha. ok, maybe i should explain that there was a norwegian exchange student on the other side of the pole...

me: "i am a loverly shade of purple... i mean turtle... damn, there i was trying to be random..."
dont ask.


i have made friends with a french guy called Quentin. dont laugh. i think its a pretty funny name too. anyway. we spend physics talking about random stuff and getting confused between 'later' and 'letter'... and we do LOTS of work mawrgan!! at least, i do. he does absolutly nothing! but today we had fun with timers, trying to stop and start them at the same time.

ok, no one else finds that amusing? oh well he drew all over my pencil case too. and for anyone/ everyone who hasnt seen my pencilcase, it was a loverly Smiggle, green stripy kinda see-thru one, but it now has "hi little girl how are you good luck for today" and a big smiley written on it in permanent marker... lovely.


he makes me smile and that is a good thing.

no news on the heart: booked in for my ECG and holter moniter for wed and thurs. two days off school will not be good. but theyll be the first two iv had off all year. Echocardiogram is booked for 27th aug. hopefully my being at a rock concert on the 20th wont affect things... ergh! im so not missing that concert!

seems everyone i tell about my heart has a heart condition too... selfish bastards! dont they know that im the only one in the world with a possible heart problem!!??!! lol... one even has a deformed heart, in that she only has two chambers instead of three. freaky. anywho. theyv all convinced me that i can live happily (although they are both teachers... maybe not so happy ) with a heart prob, so im getting over it. ill just see what happens.


still no luck with said persons email, so i may have to email him and abuse him.
confused?

me too.

off to melb tomorrow. excited. hope tod is well enough to come.

bought maddis bday present yesterday. v excited. now i just have to buy the condoms, sprinkles and coloured tacks and that will be it. ooh, and a cake to smoosh in her face.

i mean...






ergh.


GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR! EMAIL! ]]> ~losersrule http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/9560703/ http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/9560703/ Tue, 01 Aug 2006 00:19:30 PDT
I was unable to donate blood last week due to my having had a heart palpitation since my last donation. It was a month ago now, and not something that bothered me, but the nurses told me I am unable to donate again until I have written permission from a doctor.

I had a doctors appointment on Saturday.

The verdict is as yet unclear, but it is likely that I have a hole in my heart. Whether or not this caused the palpitation, I am unclear, as I don't remember a lot from the appointment. However research I have done since indicates that Patent Foramen Ovale (my possible 'condition') doesn't cause heart murmurs (palpitations), so that has confused me somewhat.

PFO is not immediately life threatening. From what I can gather from my research, the danger lies in unfiltered blood being able to pass through my system, causing clots and the possibility of a stroke. I am told that clots in the blood at my age are unlikely, but later on in life...

However that's something I wish not to think about. Yes I am living by the fact that if I pretend it's not there it might go away.

I have been booked in for an echocardiogram for August 27; an ultrasound of my heart to get some sort of picture of what's going on.

I am also receiving a holter moniter which they will attach to me to wear for 24 hours to record my heart beat, as the doc also thinks I have Pronounced Sinus Arrhythmia (excessive speeding up of the heart on breathing in, and excessive slowing of the heart on breathing out, so much so that it almost stops), and an electrocardiogram for the same kind of thing, which I shall get on Wednesday next week.




I've been a bit of an emotional wreck since Saturday, just crying randomly and generally feeling sorry for myself. I know it's stupid. It's not that I'm going to die from it, but, as Sel put it so well, learning that you're not invincible sucks. It's one of those things I always subconsciously told myself would never happen to me.

So, that's my week in a nutshell. I don't want sympathy or anything, I'm just filling you in, because, depressing as it sounds (insult not intended) you guys are the ones who I care about, and who hopefully care about me.

I realised that when I'm in emotional shock, I forget that other people may be in pain too, it just all becomes about me. So I'm sorry if I'm neglecting people...







I think this may be the first serious journal I have ever written on here, and I hope it shall be my last. ]]> ~losersrule http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/9539470/ http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/9539470/ Sun, 30 Jul 2006 02:58:54 PDT the feeling of holding a surprise party for someone
having a surprise party held for you
rainbows
getting something off a shelf for a stranger in the supermarket
the feel of a guy stroking your thumb subconciously when you're holding hands
having people play with your hair
milk chocolate Lindt balls- sucked not bitten
counting pointless objects
finding a song that sums up your emotions perfectly
a cat's purr
boasting
stopping mid kiss and just smiling
trying to reach your nose with your tongue
a smile through tears
hugging my brother
dice
dancing round your room to rock music
being pushed on a swing
being carefree and stupid
the feel of freshly shaved legs
feeling stupidly beautiful
crunching loudly
having the wish youd wished for on every birthday cake's candles for 7 years come true
the view of the mountains fading into a distant blue shadow near my house
laughing so hard your ribs ache
the random facts on pad strips
saying exactly the same thing at exactly the same time as a friend
full body massages
raw vegies
giggling with mum
having the urge to do a cartwheel but knowing full well you physically cant
the smell of freshly cut grass in spring
guys' stubble
looking back at how silly and immature you were last year, knowing full well you'll think the same thing next year
the letter 'k'
taking off in a plane
maison
people who take a stand for what they believe in
doing double takes
playing only the part of a flute piece that sounds cool and i can play, coz the rest takes too much effort
getting along with your family
receiving sincere praise
hugging mum and being able to rest my chin on her head
tulips and gerbras
remembering random memories
making wishes on eyelashes
the feel of that popping candy on your tongue
the colours green
being at a music concert and suddenly having the mood hit you
a well played clarinet solo
long random emails
having a suit jacket offered to you in the cold
deja vu
being home alone and pumping up chill out music
feeling at home
learning that the words you've been singing to a song are completely wrong
long comfortable hugs
wiping soup from your chin and looking up to meet the gaze of someone who caught you
refinding old mix tapes your father made you when you were 5
sneezing
having a crush on someone simply because you admire them so much
butterflies in your stomach
loving your body
the number 3
seeing your hair fall to the floor at the hairdresser
wiping dust off family photos
dancing cheek to cheek
crap sitcoms
having friends on the other side of the world
being woken by the sunshine
a kookaburra's laugh
swearing simply because its the best thing to do at the time
still sleeping with the teddy bear you were given at birth
falling asleep knowing that someone out there cares
photos
the tingle in your toes that means your getting pins-and-needles
old letters
having a dragonfly land on your hand
keeping in touch with your ballet teacher who left the country 10 years ago
smooshing cake in someones face
standing inside the door of the stove
saying sorry and the world returning to normal
joining the womens club- even if youd rather not have 4 yrs later
singing as low as you can
sitting still, not thinking
seeing someone you havnt seen in months/ years and chatting comfortably
receiving hand made cards
cleaning out my cupboards
the smell of fresh garlic
staring at the stars
eating my mothers cooking
wearing sexy underwear when no one else knows
finding 5 cents on the ground
giving buskers money even if you dont like their music, simply because you admire their confidence
having kids look up to you
being young enough to race to your christmas stockings at 5am
believing in the tooth fairy
seeing friends photos in the newspaper
being treated like an adult by adults
making friends with people on trains
enid blyton
being mortified when a guy asked to kiss me when i was 12
buying yellow shoes
finding great opshop buys, even if you get them home and realise they dont quite suit you
playing baldadash
driving past your primary school
holding hands with young children
freckles fading
playing pass the parcel
pulling faces in photos
staying up late watching movies that you have on dvd, but its on tv so you watch it anyway
making my dad proud
simple messages of support and kindness
having the confidence to... ]]> ~losersrule http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/9440181/ http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/9440181/ Thu, 20 Jul 2006 17:30:46 PDT

thanks to all who have wished me well and sent me glomps, and maddi for thinking of sending my parents a 'deepest sympathy' card... very sweet.

now i get to spend my birthday doing homework...

oh but its ok, i have choice; i can do my theatre SAC due monday, english essay due monday, or english intro for another essay due monday... hmm... difficult.

will iever stop complaining? not likely!

much love all. ]]> ~losersrule http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/9411448/ http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/9411448/ Tue, 18 Jul 2006 04:49:57 PDT
only wilko understands me.






ok guys, you dont get it, i said "only wilko understands me"

that is not a cue for you to start AGREEING WITH ME!!!

grrrrrr












































































































The pessimist complains about the wind;

The optimist expects it to change;

And the realist adjusts the sails. ]]> ~losersrule http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/9401006/ http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/9401006/ Mon, 17 Jul 2006 01:57:41 PDT
"Oh sorry, i thought you were my thirteen."

stands up and moves away.



looks back at group staring confusedly at her.

Maddi: "whaaaaaat??"

Emma: "yeah, i meant to say 'girlfriend.'" *shrugs* and walks away. ]]> ~losersrule http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/9173067/ http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/9173067/ Sat, 24 Jun 2006 21:12:29 PDT (before you sue me, thats their words not mine...)

man it was awesome. id tell you all about it, but that would mean less people would ask me about it at school

just a short summary of my week for you to laugh at. this is a snipet of info from the notepad next to the phone, which was information about some law or other that applied if you had arrested someone who had a drug problem. and i kid you not, i have not altered this at all...

How can I tell if someone has a drug problem?
They admit to being dependant on a drug.


well no shit sherlock! i would have thought that was a pretty good sign!

anyway, im meant to be writing an english essay, so id better go and pretend to myself that ill do it. ergh. ]]> ~losersrule http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/9154582/ http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/9154582/ Fri, 23 Jun 2006 00:55:53 PDT
ok, so it was self awarded, but still...

and the worst kisser award goes to...

you guessed it!! lol, and the crowd goes wild!! woot woot woot! oh, emma just got an electric current thru her tum tum.


whats with summer flings? i know iv never had one. not that id be an expert in the fling field anyway, but mine tend to be winter ones.
yeah ok, i just realised that in summer people can see more than my face, which must be disturbing for all involved.

and another thing iv noticed, huys seem to like giving me their hairties as gifts.
this says 3 things about me:
... i have a thing for guys with hair. ok, well apart from craig. and you know, i mean, real hair. lots of. tho im getting better.
... thats the most emotional gift i am worth, woot! a hair tie!
... theres no 3rd, its just that 3 is my lucky number...


scott wasnt at work today.

well, he was, but i missed him before he went out in the van. *tear* ill never see him again.

or shaun or steven or mike or lou or adrian or nicky or tony or claire or loretta or justin or... any of them. even worse, i wont get to answer another police phone till i join. bugger.

i nearly cried watching Oprah today. and lou and i had just been bagging it out, so i changed channel. young and the restless was on!!


oh, i do have news, apart from me being a crap kisser and not seeing scott again... i saw a marijuana plant today. twas massive. i also smelt it. its so gross.

dont do drugs kids.

the police have to sit there and smell it all day. ew.


god im hungry. i wanted sushi after work, but of course andy didnt know where the good sushi place was, so he took me to a random place which had really crap sushi. and i walked off on him. he got all pissed off. hehehe.



yeah, theres no sex in this, i just wanted to stop you from reading this coz im going to get waaaaaaaaay too many questions. questions i dont feel like answering. so let me say right now, i am NOT going to answer questions. if your statement comment is interesting i shall reply to it, if not... wah wah wow ]]> ~losersrule http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/9132548/ http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/9132548/ Wed, 21 Jun 2006 00:53:41 PDT its that time of year again. the time when i say:

BOOYAH!


and now that thats out of the way...

i met scott yesterday
i have a cut on my toe
i have highchew
i turn 17 in a month
woot
i went to a club called 'the laundry'
HIGHCHEW people, HIGHCHEW!
i ate sushi
i answered the phone. that was so scary
the laundry was fun- apart from the sleazy 70 yr old
yumm, sushi
sense? nope.
love is everywhere- i dont wanna bend down and pick it up
i saw weed today
i got breathalised... 0.000 wheee
no extreme karaoke for me
movies? but no.
aringdingdingdingbahbah
a kiss on the neck- i cant live without you
polish coffee mug
angus said... but no
jaguar. yumm
you've seen me at my worst, and it wont be the last time im down there
eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
i wonder what my fav letter is
4 oclock on the dot dont be late coz i wont stay




ayeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeees

did you know: im not likely to ever see Constable (Shaun) Hill or Leading Senior Constable (Steve) Hemingway ever again. *tear* theyr my friends.

Romeo India Golf Hotel Tango...

India Sierra Hotel Oscar Uniform Lima Delta Whiskey Romeo India Tango Echo Lima India Kilo Echo Tango Hotel India Sierra Alpha Lima Lima Tango Hotel Echo Tango India Mike Echo.

or not.

ciao bella ]]> ~losersrule http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/9083782/ http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/9083782/ Sun, 18 Jun 2006 00:36:52 PDT [Edit]ok, if i seem a little hyper its coz iv just finished a massive convo with Andy (ok, and im freeeeeezing cold, but shh!)... we r catching up wednesday night!!! and ... no i dont think i need to go into details, but im so excited. hes such a sweetie, hes all concerned that he cant give me a relationship and he doesnt want to hurt me and... eeeeeek!!!
(hi Andy if your reading this... yes i tell my DA friends everything... doop di doo!! eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee eeeeeeeeeeeeeeee)




no explanation needed


but ill give a brief one coz im pissed off


ok, yes i understand that my mother is protective, and ok, i can see how she didnt like the idea of me sleeping in the back of a van with four 19yr old guys, 3 of which i dont know... fine. but she probably wouldnt like the fact that my friends tried to get me drunk last weekend either. it happens. im a teenager. and if she hadnt rung exactly when she had, id be in that van, outside that music store, with my friend. and ok, so i find him attractive... and i think maybe he might think im ok... but...

GRRRRRRRRRRRRRR


ok, that doesnt explain why im feeling shit, that just explains the pissed off. the feeling shit is because, by not being there, all Andy's plans fell apart, he had to cancel the whole night, and now hes pissed off with me. just as i thought, just maybe i was falling for him. he doesnt need me, he has other offers.

i have none. ]]> ~losersrule http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/9021311/ http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/9021311/ Fri, 09 Jun 2006 18:32:31 PDT

the end of classes

the end of school play practises and performances

the end of the rumour about my pregnancy

the end of Em's life at grammar


not the end of stress.


oo, i have a painting. and original of my very own. my grandpa is a wonderful artist, and at chrissie i hinted that i wouldnt mind a painting, so he painted me one for my birthday. it is soo beautiful. i love it! now i just have to find somewhere to hang it.

and yes, that was a subtle reminder that my birthday is coming up and that you all must love me at least until then so you can give me material possessions. lol. the cold is freezing my head up.

i only just noticed i was shaking with cold... thats not good, im going to go and get warmer. (see, i look after myself. you know who you are)

love nighties.

or night lovies.

whichever you prefer.



admittedly this journal is only here to get you to visit my page so i reach the ridiculous number of 4000 pageviews.... ]]> ~losersrule http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/8984577/ http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/8984577/ Tue, 06 Jun 2006 04:11:55 PDT
maybe.



oh the trials of being squillions of atoms thrown randomly together, roaming this thing we call earth.


out of curiosity... has anyone ever laid on/in their bed at night and thought. this is so fucking random. i am a bunch of bones and random skin and stuff, and here i am thinking 'my god i have so much homework to do' or 'i hate so and so' or 'that sex i just had was really shit'... its so... pointless.

sorry, getting as philosophical as my sexually orientated brain will allow.


peace war sex and cuddles.







and stop thinking about it. ]]> ~losersrule http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/8685981/ http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/8685981/ Fri, 02 Jun 2006 22:12:43 PDT
to entertain your little brains, i have here some rather amusing (or at least, mads and i think they are) real life quotes, brought to you by the disfunctional people who live and (often unfortunately) breathe at my school...

[Edit]- due to popular demand, some new quotes have been added:

From late last yr: Kate, "'Ya Mum' jokes are so old right now!"
Thom- "Ya mum's so old right now"
(that was THE best come back i have heard in a while!)

30/1/06: Mr Collins- head of year: "I've been to a few meetings where the skirt's come up"
- in relation to the length of the girls' school uniform
(I want to go to his kind of meetings!)

31/1/06: Mr Duncan- maths methods teacher: "What does a graph require?" Angus- disfunctional friend/ deb partner: "Graph paper?"
(maybe not quite the answer he was expecting...)

2/2/06: Mrs Jacka- extremely disfunctional new chaplain: "This woman was on her death row. I mean, death bed."
(need i comment??) a chaplain, for those who dont know, is basically a priest. im sure someone wil correct me, coz im sure theres a real difference, but i know nothing... no idea what she was actually talking about, as i wasnt listening...

Dateless: Abbey Minter- year 10 girl who i used to think was quite nice... refering to my questioning a friend of hers whether she wanted to buy a raffle ticket for our easter egg raffle: "what, do you want her to get fat??"
and she was serious!


Musical interlude: "all my friends are fuck ups, but they're fun to have around" beautifully put by the one and only Whitlams.


27/3/06: Mr Duncan (as previously explained): "Would you girls be quiet?!?"
Angus (as previously understated): "It wasn't me!!"
(oh the shame, my deb partner thinks he's a girl...)

Dateless: Sarah Heath- blonde yr 8 ditz: "No offence, but that's really retarded"
-refering to my walking up and down the bus wearing mads' uberly hot high high high heeled boots. ok, so i was practically falling on everyone, but still! the nerve of some people!

19/4/06: Mawrgan- rather intellegent friend... except for this: "My god Laura, you look like a dying corpse!"

27/4/06: The owner of this quote is still under question, either Kris or Angus: "The next Survivor show... Survivor: Nuclear Island!!"
-during a discussion in physics as to where nuclear waste should be stored.

28/4/06: Maddi- extremely ugly, fat, blonde 'friend' ( xoxo): "Emma, if you were black, would you still be pale?"
- after a conversation with Mr Duncan as to what i would look like if i were black but still had red hair. yes i know, nothing to do with maths, but who does maths in maths class???

4/5/06: this one's a little hard to write, i need a drawing as well, but i shall give it a shot... setting: in maths... again...
Me: "Why do we have to do so much on the board, i want to do some work!"
Mads: "Emma, you're playing tetris!" (on her calculator)
Me: "No I'm not!" (camera pans over to screen of calculator in my hands with TETRIS written across the screen...)
(ergh)


lol, cant remember when this one was. probably in maths one day:
Maddi: (looking at a photo in my diary from the paper of mum and me when i was born- refering to my mum) "Look at the 60's hair-do!! wow!"
... a few seconds silence...
Me: "Madds, i wasnt born in the 60's..."


lol, love you mads. now you have to find all our physics random quotes and put them up. ahh, good times, good times. 2 oclock, ergh... should write that essay plan... yuk yuk yuk. nyuk nyuk nyuk.
yes, i just became a vampire. sorry.

8/5/06: Emma (ie. me): maybe mary woke up on christmas morning and jesus was in her stocking.
a few seconds silence...
Mads: emma, there was no christmas before jesus was born...
DOH!!

10/5/06: Emma (as above): anyone would think i was blonde under all this hair.

23/5/06: Courtney (bus buddy)- in relation to the announcement that mr duncan (our maths teacher) is leaving the school- i know, now we actually have to do work!! ... for a bit of context, our head of school is also leaving, and the new head of school was announced a week ago: "I did wonder why he wasn't getting a head job."
no comment.... ]]> ~losersrule http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/8455502/ http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/8455502/ Thu, 13 Apr 2006 04:19:13 PDT
SONG LIST

How does the world see me?
Cocoon- Jack Johnson (erin agrees with that one... pretty true.)

Will I have a happy life?
Gone Surfing- The Whitlams

What do people really think of me?
Nella Fantasia- Il Divo (it means 'In The Fantasy'... not sure how to take that...)

Do people secretly lust after me?
The Scientist- Coldplay (OMG!! MR SMITH!!!! ARGH!!!! lmao)

How do you feel right now?
I've Seen That Movie Too- Elton John

How can I make myself happy?
Underneath Your Clothes- Shakira (hey hey hey! i like! )

What should I do with my life?
Human II (Don't Turn Your Back On Me)- Boys II Men

Will I ever have children?
Bring The Funk- Ben Harper (lol... ergh!)

What is some good advice for me?
Low- R.E.M. (hmmm... im not sure thats a good thing...)

What do I think my current theme song is?
Remorse- Sarah Blasko (omg... can this thing read minds??)

What does everyone else think my current theme song is?
Everything's On Fire- Hunters and Collectors (huh??)

What song will play at my funeral?
Te Aviso, Te Anuncio (Tango)- Shakira (it means [and i warn you my trusty translater may not be so trusty...] 'I Warn You, I Announce To You'... does that mean im warning people ill keep haunting them?? eeeee!!)

What type of men/women do you like?
Swing, Swing- The All American Rejects (LMAO!!)

What is my day going to be like?
Otherside- Red Hot Chilli Peppers

Why am I here?
I Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking For- U2 (lol, god this is funny)

What will people remember me for?
For Sale- Kasey Chambers (lol, ok, emma will become a prostitute... noice! ill take bookings now if you like... that makes sense with the making myself happy thing i spose...)

What song will I get stuck in my head tomorrow?
Nothing To Lose- Daryl Braithwaite (not likely)

Are there people outside waiting to take me away?
Never- Boys II Men (mwahaha)

What will this year be all about?
Saturated- Kasey Chambers (argh! chemistry!!!!!!!!!!)


well, that was fun, i want to do it again!!!! ]]> ~losersrule http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/8369973/ http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/8369973/ Wed, 05 Apr 2006 03:07:28 PDT

that is all.

merry christmas.

i think im in love.

i mean, on speed.


ergh.

Jonathan 4149 Australia

if you say you love me once more, i may just have to fuck your brains out.

what a charming picture.

leaving... ]]> ~losersrule http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/8180930/ http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/8180930/ Thu, 16 Mar 2006 17:27:42 PST
and now, with that off my mind, i turn to the matter at hand: sunburn. oh how i hate it.

moving on.


sorry folks, im a little... disorientated? i dont know. i think ever since trying to write 'decision' a few moments ago, and sitting there for a minute with my fingers hovering confussedly over the keys, my brain has given up on me and left, and my body isn't taking it so well... my appologies for any inconvenience.

in the last month and a half since i last wrote to you, my DA minions, who only watch me because they know me in real life and know the terror of my angst, or they are friends of friends and ditto the angst. where was i? oh yes, in the last month and a half, i have listened to amazing music (Whitlams- Little Cloud, out on Monday!!!! anyone who loves me and wishes to show it in a material form, forget flowers, I WANT THIS CD!!! and you should all go and buy it too, to support Australia's best four people.), read some average books (Agatha Christie isnt too bad really...), taken no photos what so ever (yes, apart from the one i submitted, dont be picky)... oh yes, and been to school.


i had some wonderfully sexist jokes sent to me the other day, a couple of which id like to share with you, enjoy:


Q: What does it mean when a man is in your bed gasping for breath and calling your name?
A: You did not hold the pillow down long enough.


A man and his wife, now in their 60's, were celebrating their 40th wedding anniversary. On their special day a good fairy came to them and said that because they had been so good that each one of them could have one wish.
The wife wished for a trip around the world with her husband.
Whoosh! Immediately she had airline/cruise tickets in her hands.
The man wished for a female companion 30 years younger...
Whoosh...immediately he turned ninety!!! Gotta love that fairy!


and after that musical interlude.
i think im hungry.
i say i think, because i dont really know.
if i only had a brain.

oh, for those of you who dont know, it is ~GreatGreenDragon's 19th bday on sunday, and im sure hed love, as a surprise, for everyone to go to his site, or email or ring him to share the love. but shhhh, its a surprise.

and with that, i depart. i possibly wont leave another journal for a few months, what with all my curricular and extra curricular activities, blah di blah di blah.

much love

*sigh* hot simon has left the building. and the farm...

"kiss me I'm Irish" ]]> ~losersrule http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/7766786/ http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/7766786/ Wed, 01 Feb 2006 00:07:17 PST

1. What color are your kitchen plates? becoming more and more white. originally they had a vine pattern around the edge with grapes and strawberries i think... and a pale blue rim... i like them

2. What book are you reading now? Special- Bella Bathurst.

3. What is on your mouse pad? if i were to dig it out from under a pile of bookwork, it would probably be something to do with farming... some fertilizer company or something.

4. Favorite board game? baldadash!

5. Least favorite smells? death

6. What is the first thing you think of in the morning? people can actually think in the mornings?? wow...

7. Favorite color? atm, green (no, thats not auto tellar machine green... i dont think there is such a colour...)

8. Least favorite color? ucky ucky spew brown

9. How many rings until you answer the phone? 52.3

10. FUTURE CHILD'S NAME: Girl: Harriet Boy: Xavier

11. Chocolate or Vanilla?
icecream: vanilla... anything else: chocolate!

12. Do you like to drive fast? no... im too scared! tho iv decided driving is a great stomach muscle workout...

13. Do you sleep with a stuffed animal? yeah... although poor toby usually ends up uncuddled...

14. Do you like thunderstorms? im beginning to forgive them... slowly

15. What was your first car? a rusted pink one which my brother, cousins, next door neighbours and i used to pedal up and down our verandah... i miss that little car.

16. What is your sign? cancer/ snake

17. Do you eat the stems of broccoli? yumm!

18. If you could have any job what would it be? actor. if only i could act.

19. If you could have any colour hair what would it be? my own

20. Is the glass half full or half empty? you tell me, its ur glass

21. What is your favorite movie? four weddings and a funeral. i could watch that over and over and over...

22. Do you type with your fingers on the right keys? meh

23. What’s under your bed? floor.

24. What is your favorite number? 3

25. Favorite sports to watch? sports are for playing, not watching

26. Your single biggest intense pain? emotional. i dont need to go into that here.

29. Ketchup or mustard? mustard. yumm

31. Hamburger or hot dog? hamburger with the lot minus the onion.

32. Favorite season? spring. iv always been jealous that my brothers bday is in spring

33. The best place you have ever been? home.

34. What is your screen saver? jude law

35. What is your favorite fast food place? subway, or the small chinese place near junior school

36. What is your favorite breed of Dog? beagle!

37. Your nicknames? emm, george, rooni, emmsy, emmsy pems, loser, chops, rabbit, possum, crack whore (and other explicit words... thanks mads...)

38. Have you ever been kissed by the opposite gender? does it change anything?

39. What annoys you the most? that ringing in my ears whenever maddi opens her mouth

40. What’s your crushes name? i wish i knew

41. What’s your best friend’s name? maddikatesventhomjennmawrganangus

42. Which celebrity annoys you the most? paris hilton

43. What type of music do you dislike the most? techno

45. What is currently on your wrist? a hair tie and my watch

46. Okay, If you and one other person could be alone on the entire planet, who would you choose? could be alone? so we didnt have to be? catherine zeta jones. because shes awesome, i reckon she could chat for ages, and then theres enough of her to keep me fed for a while.

sorry

47. What would you do if you had 24 hours to live? live.

48. If you were a character in the View Askewniverse, who would you be?
the short stubby dude

49. If you could be any kind of nut, what would you be? i already am one

50. Who would you vote for TOTAL DICTATORSHIP? shane

..:: Now add a question to this quiz, and the 5 people you tag have to answer that question and add one of their own ::..

51. Do you want Adult Swim to bring Case Closed back?
not really

52. Do you think that the "pink is pimp" is just a fad... ]]> ~losersrule http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/7736643/ http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/7736643/ Sat, 28 Jan 2006 22:39:48 PST (it was the only vehicle emoticon...)

5 offered, one taken- dates

1. random. coffee.- guy trying to pick me up

2. hot, wet, salty.- tears shed

6.5: 4.5 good, 2 crap.- books read

15 hours.- until school started

1 public "salute"- self explanitory i think

198 months.- my age

1. "Slut".- one random guy calling me a slut

Two beds and a coffee machine.- a song

$5.- money i owe mitchell, lol

11: 4 good, 7 crap.- movies seen

6 of those stupid bloody brown smelly bugs.- killed in 5 mins because theyr so bloody annoying

3kg.- lost

9 days. Waiting.- for a lie.



yeah.

if you understood any of that, u get a prize of your choice. (ie hug, kiss, massage, lollies etc... NO musical performances!) ]]> ~losersrule http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/7661769/ http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/7661769/ Fri, 20 Jan 2006 21:27:45 PST

1sts...

Music concert: as in, real music concert. as in, the whitlams! it was sooo good and sooo much fun, and... wow... just great. and it was free! lol, me scungy person me. i couldnt get over how much energy there was, and how great they are as a band. like when tim was singing one of my favourite songs, and he accidentally skipped a verse, they just kept going without skipping a beat. it was so cool! and when they started a song, and tim turned around and said to terepai (the drummer) "this ones in 3/4" lol, it was so funny. and i will always hold a place in my heart for Hot Guy, the guy we stalked in the car park (Aunty Jenny "Are you going out?" Me "Do you want to go out?" hehe)

Fondu party: hmmmm, chocolate and cherries and strawberries and marshmellows and pineapple, and then fingers...

Experience of a major breakup: its not my right to talk about it here, but all my love to hilz

Opshopping experience where i didnt buy anything: i know!!! shock horror!! i felt so let down!! *tear* (hehe, i just realised that the 'r' 'e' and 's' keys on my keyboard have worn off completely random)

Being called a slut. By a total stranger: yup, crazy melb people. how on earth did my reputation stretch that far??

Catching up with actor friends in two yrs: yeah, drews the only one that really counts there but it was soo good to see them/ him.

Fed square + 1000s of ex yr 12 experience: oh god, that was freaky! crying/ screaming 18yrs olds!! argh!! that also led to...

Random guy trying to pick me up: ARGH! i was at fed square, holding hilz's coffee while she lined up for a paper (oh, this was to get uni offers, for anyone who has no idea what im on about...) and this guy came up to me and started chatting me up... god it was scary! thankfully hilz came back and saved me.

Trip to torquay: note to self, torquay - sunscreen = pain.

Person on one carriage train at "southern cross" station at 6.41am: *groan* but that was pretty cool! there were only two of us on the train when it left.

Deb dress tried on that i reeeeeally like: omg omg omg!!! i am soooo excited!!!! i cant believe its finally our turn to do it! yay! lol, ill probably break a leg or something that will stop me. ah well. but my god its going to be a busy first semester this yr: sinf monday nights, school play tuesday nights, deb practise wednesday nights, school play thursday nights, and school play sunday... oh god. plus somewhere in there i have to pass my theory exam, and keep up with a bit of school work. oh joy of joys. (i like complaining dont i! )


2nds...


Music concert: yup! another one!! PAUL KELLY!! omg, it was so good! tho i cant get over how bitchy music concert are!! ie, the lady behind us gave us greasys when we sat down (ok, so they were in the front row until we came along and sat on the ground, but hey, wer teenagers, we do that kind of thing, and its not like they couldnt see! geesh!) was really bitchy when my aunt sat where her precious daughters feet were meant to go. I also, randomly, saw my peer support leader from yr 7! my god it was random. i never really "connected" with him, so i didnt say hi to him or anything, but it was funny to see him at a paul kelly concert in torquay

Bruise for the week: falling up stairs is painful.

Movie seen at Elsternwick movie theatre: "Memoirs of a Geisha" i really must read the book now. but it was good.
i think.
im not su... ]]> ~losersrule http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/7612711/ http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/7612711/ Sun, 15 Jan 2006 16:35:19 PST so, thanks to ~blue-luno-kiwi i give you: the importance of being emma! tada!


1. Grab the book nearest to you, turn to page 18, and find line 4.
im at my cousins house, u expect there to be books??
ok, after going through 2 rooms i found : "content now, we wend our way to bed" dont ask what wend means coz i have no idea...

2. Stretch your left arm out as far as you can...
a total of 4 remotes, a soggy hanky (my cousin broke up with her bf this morning... ), the book i just quoted from, my awesome yellow shoes, my breaky bowl, oh, the couch im sitting on...

3. What is the last thing you watched on TV?
SCRUBS!!! we r halfway thru season 2 now, should be finished by the end of the day!!

4. Without looking, guess what time it is:
11.23am

5. Now look at the clock. What is the actual time?
11.18am meh

6. With the exception of the computer, what can you hear?
a train, the nextdoor neighbour mowing his lawn and birds.

7. When did you last step outside? What were you doing?
last night about 7.30 telling my aunt dinner was ready. but im going shopping today as soon as my cousin gets back from the doctor.

8. Before you started this survey, what did you look at?
journals...

9. What are you wearing?
my pjs; black singlet top and grey pants

10. Did you dream last night?
lol, yeah, my friend had a baby, and i was her partner but i dont know who the father was. the baby had a deformed foot

11. When did you last laugh?
watching scrubs this morning. but majorly last night when we were playing spoons and the boys were imitating our screams

12. What is on the walls of the room you are in?
nothing really. i mean, theres fairy lights up still from christmas and theres heaps of crissie cards etc, but nothing on the actualy walls.

13. Seen anything weird lately?
hehe, when i went to the whitlams' concert on saturday (omg omg omg ) there was this majorly drunk guy, and tim freedman was taking the piss out of him so much... twas very funny.

14. What do you think of this quiz?
its different to the usual ones which is good.

15. What is the last film you saw?
cinema; fun with dick and jane and dvd; the hours.

16. If you became a multi-millionaire overnight, what would you buy?
my sanity id probably do something stupid like go and buy some designer clothes or something just because i could, but i think id be too shocked to really think about it.

17. Tell me something about you that I don't know.
im scared.

18. If you could change one thing about the world, regardless of guilt or politics, what would you do?
remove war. but thats not a viable option anyway, because for there to be love there has to be hate...

19. Do you like to dance?
live for it

20. George Bush
uncle

21. Imagine your first child is a girl, what do you call her?
harriet

22. Imagine your first child is a boy, what do you call him?
xavier

23. Would you ever consider living abroad?
if what was there could make up for what id leave behind.

24. What do you want God to say to you when you reach the pearly gates?
haha, and u didnt think i exsisted!


25. 4 people who must also do this in THEIR journal:
=xadium
~losersrule http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/7577576/ http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/7577576/ Wed, 11 Jan 2006 19:32:16 PST "The Adventurous Adventures of Roosh and Roon!"

The Great Temple of Drama Part I

DISCLAIMER: I had no imput whatsoever into any jokes involving the older brother of one of my dear friends. And any information about such person given in this story is purely fictional. If, of course, hypothetically, there was to be a joke about such person, which of course, hypothetically, there wouldn't be. (ie. sorry Jenn! )

We find our great superheros still battling their way through the Hoemwerc forests. Behind them they can here the infamous Teechir tribe decending upon them. They know full well they plan to trap them and make them battle the deadly Ecsams at the edge of the forest. Many have attempted these battles, and none have lived to tell the tale. Things are not looking good for out noble, brave, attractive, funky, awesome, beautiful superheros. As they pound on through the forest, hacking away at the undergrowth, Roon tries to lighten the moment.

"Hey Roosh, *pant* did you hear *pant* the one *pant* about *pant* the *pant pant* mailman?"

"Not now Roon. Now is not the time."

Roon stoped all of a sudden and leaned ever so casually against a tree, pretending not to look completely and utterly out of breathe and disheveled next to her apparently unaffected companion.

"Roosh, this is ridiculous!" Roon cried, "Why don't we just face them and not listen to anything they say and throw stuff at them and give them all break downs. It's worked every other time. Like, do you remember that Mr. Kawa..."

"Shh!" Roosh put her finger to her lips. (Not sexually you sexually motivated people! Roosh isn't like that!! Gee!) She looked around. There was silence. She took a few steps back in the direction they'd come, looking around slowly. Roon had no idea what Roosh was on about, but thought she'd better look important, so got down on her hands and knees and put her ear to the ground. When she still couldn't hear anything, she stared sniffing the ground for clues. After sniffing her way over to a nice smelling flower, but not finding anything she figured would be useful, she looked around to find Roosh. Roosh was leaning against a tree trying hard not to laugh at her companion in the dirt sniffing flowers. Roon tried to stand and brush the dirt of herself without losing what was left of her dignity.

"Nothing there" she said cheerfully.

"That's the whole point," explained Roosh, "It's the Teechirs, they've stopped." She looked around, alert. "We must have come to something they're afraid of."

Roon wasn't in any hurry to go anywhere, especially towards something that the fearless tribe of Teechirs was afraid of, so decided to look busy. She turned to look at what she'd been leaning on. (Yeah yeah, the temple's coming, hold your horses!!)

"Hey Roosh, look at this! It's a statue. And it's got this big thi... well helloooo Mr. Statue!! Hehe, Roosh, it's a very manly statue!!"

At this news Roosh got very excited. (Not the news about how big the statue was! Gee! I told you she's not like that! She got excited about the fact that there was a statue! Tut tut tut, sexually minded people...)

"If there's a statue, there must be a temple around here somewhere." Roosh said excitedly (See, I told you she was excited!!), "And if that's what's scared off the Teechirs, I think I know which temple it is! Come on!"

Roosh started heading off in a random direction which would eventually be the right direction towards the temple. (Don't you hate it when they always know which way to go!)

"Wait, there's a name on the statue!" cried Roon, "But there's roots all over it." (No, that wasnt another sexual joke, you made that one yourselves, you sick people)

Roon tried desperately to pull away the roots.

"Come on Roon! We'll be safer in the temple!"

"But I've almost got it... There! It says Stuart Ke..."

At this Roosh grabbed her side kick firmly by the leg and dragged her until she complained about the amount of dirt entering her nostrils and that although iron was good for you, she didn't think they meant you to consume it in this way, although maybe it would be something to suggest to the hospital when they got back home, and when would that be by the way because she was getting a bit sick of all this running and what-not, not that she was unfit or anything, but she was getting gross muscles in her upper thighs and... It was at this point her leg was dropped and she passed the rest of her thoughts on to the ants on the ground.
<... ]]> ~losersrule http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/7541043/ http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/7541043/ Sun, 08 Jan 2006 01:57:53 PST
ok, and for those unfortunate ones still here, i give you:



yeah, nothing. im too cheap and scungy. actually, iv told myself i wont spend anymore money than i really need to this yr... wonder how long thatll last...

well, for news i have: i went deb dress hunting with my mumsie on friday (oh dear, i guess i should check angy still wants to go with me shouldnt i... hmm...) anywho, that was fun. wer going to traralgon sometime this week to continue our search. oh the excitement!! (what is it with (some) girls and finding trying on fitted pieces of cloth exciting?? but it is.... weird)

also, everyone boycott sony until they fix my mp3 player software not fair! iv had it for like 2 weeks, and its stuffed... grrrr... not the player, thats ok, and iv got another program now that i can use to put music on, but it doesnt activate all the cool extras...

anywho. oh, my brother also fixed the webcam for me, so everyone come online and talk to me!!! except if im having a really ugly day... then dont my brother is so smart! isnt he madds lol... (its ok hun, as if hed waste his time looking on here. although, if he did, then there would be absolutely nothing to say that what i just said would mean anything along the lines of you wanting to mack him, not that he knows what 'mack' means, damn uni student...)

i actually came on here to give u another book report, but im not sure i can be bothered... ill probably get kicked off in a minute anyway... but i will tell u i am currently reading "the miracle life of edgar mint" let me know if uv read it, because i seriously doubt any of u have. and thats not an insult to anyones intelligence, i promise.

watched 'vanity fair' last night... id been waiting to see it for ages. it was... ok. it had jonathon rhys meyers in it and whoever played rebeccas husband (u can tell i take a lot of notice during films dont i; i dont even remember their names, just their faced... im such a hypocrit only looking at hot men... im sorry world...)

hmmm... well... yes...
oh, i saw a really cool saying on someones little tag thing here on DA (sorry for stealing it whoever it was) but i love it... probably because im obsessed with colour, but anywho:
colours laugh and colours cry; turn out the lights and colours die.

hehe, how cool.
oh dear, best be off. roosh, the story's coming i promise, i wrote my letter today, so it shall come when i have an hour or so on the computer.

sweet sleepwalks. ]]> ~losersrule http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/7504349/ http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/7504349/ Wed, 04 Jan 2006 00:33:58 PST how be y'all this third day of yet another year?
i be well, tho my right hand is rather cold. as are the toes on my right foot... random but tru.
went out for coffee (minus the coffee... well it wasnt lunch... hmm...) today with the loverly mr ~Mitchellw (and maddi, tho she wasnt technically invited )
twas fun, tho i am worried that maddi told him way too many of my secrets for him ever to even think of speaking to me again but it was fun, thanks mitchell (i still cant believe u wouldnt let me pay... whats with the world?? anyone would think there were still guys with manners!! hehe...)

speaking of maddi, she has not so recently got an account here, but never used it till today... i give you here link, but i warn u that she doesnt have any real photography up yet... just a shocking photo of me... u have been warned! ~silly-ballerina enjoy. and love her because she is beautiful. even if she did cancel our engagement.

new yrs seems to be a popular topic these days, so: i sat at home, on the internet till 11.30 talking to 2 of my friends who are currently in france, and then i sat txting a few people until maybe 1, fell asleep and was woken up by my phone beeping at 3 *twitch*... but yeah, thats my excitement...

went to a drive in theatre when i was in melb... sooo cool! id never been to one before, and it was just so... vintage! saw narnia, which wasnt as good as the original, and no where near as scary! then we saw fun with dick and jane, coz, well, why not... saw a bit of king kong which was on another screen between films... hehe...

seriously nothing happening here... should learn all that jap stuff we were meant to have been taught last yr and werent... grrr... so, i sit here, stressing about yr 11... how petty... much more important things to stress about.

yea, im over this now.

bye. ]]> ~losersrule http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/7423614/ http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/7423614/ Mon, 26 Dec 2005 15:10:19 PST [Edit] ooooooo, lets see if emmsy can hit 3000 pageviews by saturday *insert sarcastic laughter here* lol, i know it wont happen, but its good to aim. i think...

i have hit a sudden stage of discontentment at the contents of my gallery... its quite a depressing feeling...

but i have my sony baby to keep me company... now all it needs is a name. and a cover. but a name... hmm... *hint hint* if it helps:
the Sony NW-A1000 [link]
its soo cute!!! tho now im rather broke... oh well... i hope its worth it. (oh, and its the silver one, not the purple. *shudder*)

OMG!! GUESS WHAT!! OK, FINE, DONT GUESS, BUT: I GOT ARETHA FRANKLIN'S BEST OF ALBUM!!!!!!! 43 songs on 2 cds... im in love! hehe...

anywho, thats my news. enjoy new yrs... damn tony no actually, make that damn next door neighbours party... grrr... ]]> ~losersrule http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/7387323/ http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/7387323/ Thu, 22 Dec 2005 22:49:24 PST
today is not one of those days."



R.E.M.- Great Beyond

im bored, so im going to review a few books for you... take no notice of me as i wander through my mind and alter the course of your thoughts.
havnt quite worked out how ill do that yet, but ill get there. i am a pocket sized dragon after all. and yes mitchell, with a pocket sized roar as well...

well, ill start from the start:
Nick Hornby- A Long Way Down
you may remember (or you may not, depending on wether, like me, u stalk journals and remember every single word, which i doubt you do, so u wont. now iv forgotten what i was on about...) this was one of the books i selected for one of my awards for school...
so... the general gist: four people plan to kill them selves by jumping off 'Toppers house' north londons most popular suicide spot. they meet, they eat pizza, and up going in search of a guy one of the chicks has a grudge with. they find him. then they dont know what to do. they get drunk. they go home and sleep, so they end up living. then they make up a story about seeing an angel and they get lots of money. then theres a holiday, and crap parents, and a suicide, and they all live happily ever after.
no, not really. (i think im really bad at this reviewing business...)
certainly a little morbid. well written in general, and doesnt have one of your soppy endings where everything goes back to before the guy had sex with a 15yr old and sent to jail etc etc etc...
it was a good book, honest!! ok, ur not convinced, i can tell, but oh well, its not like im trying to sell the book for him

R.E.M.- Orange Crush

David Malouf- Dream Stuff
Had to read this one for english. if i hadnt had to, i would have thrown it away without finishing it.
i honestly wasnt impressed.. hes meant to be a really good author. but maybe i dont know a good thing when i see it. *laughs* hey, i chose a book about suicide for an award!
the only one of the stories i actually liked (oh yeah, its a book of short stories... in case you cant work out from that last sentence.) was called "Blacksoil Country." nice ending. morbid, but good. i thought the rest were pointless and didnt go anywhere, which is, i suppose, the meaning of "point-less" as in, not having a point... yeah... ill go now...

R.E.M.- Bad Day (looooove this song) "shit so thick you could stir with a stick"

F. Scott. Fitzgerald- The Great Gatsby
hadnt read this before, and thought id give it a try. general gist: a guy moves into a house next to the infamous 'gatsby', become friends with him, goes to a few of his crap parties, his cousin has an affair with gatsby and later accidentally runs down her real husbands mistress... then gatsby gets killed by the husband of the mistress. as u do. the end.
i actually quite liked it, even with all the ridiculously long words (ha! after deciphering my report from my english teacher, gatsby was easy!)
bit of a weird plot, but plenty of scandals to keep me happy. i liked the detail when the mistress got run over, "they saw her left breast was swinging loose like a flap, and there was no need to listen for the heart beneath." *sigh* isnt that just poetry??
once again, another morbid book, but well written. worth a read if ur bored. and its not too long either.

R.E.M.- did u know theyv only ever written one song where they wrote the words before the music?? they are my idols as of now! and yes, i bought their 'best of'...

oh i do so love shortbread (although not that pathetic excuse for shortbread the school tried to sell, that, surprisingly the jap girls loved... weird!)

Kenneth Cook- Wake In Fright
yup, last one for now. an aussie novel which, as the cover proucly tells me, is "now a powerful and disturbing motion picture" not stationary, oh no sir!
but that just about sums it up: powerful and disturbing. or (one of my favourite words today [incase u hadnt noticed]) morbid.
general gist: a youngish male teacher who has been posted into the middle of nowhere for two years is on his way home to sydney for a much desired holiday, but on a one night stop over in a slightly bigger middle of nowhere town than where he teaches, he gambles for the first time in his life. he turns 22.10 pounds into 200 pounds, leaves feeling high and then (yup, you guessed it) talked himself into going back and trying to do it again, and losing everything.... STUPID... ]]> ~losersrule http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/7324410/ http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/7324410/ Fri, 16 Dec 2005 02:52:49 PST


Helen Clarke, Prime Minister of New Zulland, is rudely
awoken at 4am by the telephone.

"Hillen, its the Hilth Munister here. Sorry to bother you
at this hour but there is an emergency! I've just received word
thet the Durex fectory en Auckland has burned to the ground. It is
istimated thet the entire New Zulland supply of condoms will be gone by
the ind of the week."

PM: "Shut - the economy wull niver be able to cope with
all those unwanted babies - wi'll be ruined!"

Hilth Munister: "We're going to hef to shup some in from
abroad...Brutain?..."

PM: "No chence!! The Poms will have a field day on thus
one!"

Hilth Munister: "What about Australia?"

PM: "Maybe - but we don't want them to know thet we are
stuck."

Hilth Munister: "You call John Howard - tell hum we need
one moollion condoms; ten enches long and eight enches thuck! That
way they'll know how bug the Kiwis really are!!"

Helen calls John, who agrees to help the Kiwis out in
their hour of need.


Three days later a van arrives in Auckland - full of
boxes.

A delighted Hillen rushes out to open the boxes. She
finds condoms; 10 unches long; 8 unches thuck, all coloured green and
gold.
She then notices in small writing on each and ivery one.........




MADE IN AUSTRALIA - SIZE : MEDIUM ]]> ~losersrule http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/7314663/ http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/7314663/ Thu, 15 Dec 2005 00:18:04 PST [WARNING] farmgirl obcenities/ language/ i dunno what to call it, within.
also, instead of my usual music interuptions, i have random lyric interuptions... just so u know what the "ed lines are...

if i can be bothered, this is going to be one masssssssssssssssssive journal... although, more than likely i will get bored, or my headache will return, or (even more likely than those) my father will return and i shall run back to my room and say "of course i havnt been on the internet daddy, what do you take me for??"

so... you have been warned. i think.

someone else had a journal dedicated to the word "fuck", so i thought i might continue the obcenities, and write one about "shit", tho probably not as beautifully written, but thats beside the point.

"dont get up, im in heaven"

yesterday was unofficially "shit day." dont take that to mean i had a bad day, because it wasnt that bad at all. ok, well, apart from the fact that i wasnt in melbourne working like id intended, or that i think my friend has stopped talking to me because i cant go on the date with him, or that i got sunburnt on a small patch at the back of my arm because i missed sunscreening it, or that my back and legs and arms ached, or that the bike died when i was 2km from home, or that (and this is probably the reason for the subject of todays journal) a lamb that i was being particularly nice to decided my driving was 'shit' and decided to, you guessed it, 'shit' on me.

there i was, being meerlieus first unofficial lambbulance driver (i thought long and hard about the spelling of said 'lambbulance', because, if u think about it: there is a silent 'b' in lamb, so attatching it to ambulance, it would just sound like 'lamulance,' wouldnt it! so, i figured the b needs to stay. that is all.) and giving sick lambs a ride on the bike, and this one was sitting on my lap, and it was getting a bit cold, but i thought, its ok, the lamb will keep me warm. and it did, i was feeling quite comfy and warm. *shudder* and then it decided it could actually walk, so i put it on the ground, and it wasnt untill then that i realised it had shat all over my leg.

but apart from those things, it wasnt such a bad day; ok, yes i had to get up at 7 to help dad with drafting, but I DRENCHED A WHOLE MOB OF LAMBS!! ok, that wont seem exciting to anyone, but... it is to me!! but it bloody hurts!! hence the pain. i have (unofficially) 27 bruises from lambs barging into me. that probably sounds weird: theyr not exactly the small cute, cuddly things u might imagine, theyr almost grownded, and they have horns! so yeah, id never drenched before, and i drenched 671 lambs. and made $80. yeah thats right mr "i-gave-you-a-job-at-my-chemist-then-fired-you"! im earning more here than i ever would in your dingy shop! ok, working harder too, but that doesnt count!

"high up above or down below, when you're too in love to let it go, but if you never try then you'll never know, just what you're worth"

the disturbing part about yesterday was i had a blonde moment in my head... i mean, blonde moments have their place, and when said out loud u laugh and forget about it. (unless its a hilary blonde moment, and u dont forget about them, theyr way too funny!) but mental blonde moments make you worry about your sanity! i saw a dead duck lying in the middle of the paddock, and i went over to have a look (and started freaking myself out imagining it had died from bird flu...) and i was thinking to myself, well, it doesnt look like theres anything wrong with it... *short silence* ok, well except for the fact that its dead... lol... oops!

so that was yesterday. oh, and the bike started for me again, so i didnt have to walk home, so that was all good.

"some trains they leave in the morning. some leave in the afternoon. some trains they leave here right on time; and some they just leave too soon"

then this morning, i got woken up by the phone at maybe 7.30, but i just let it ring... i hate having to get up to answer the phone, especially coz my voice sounds weird. and then at about 8.30, mum came in and said, emma, angus is on the phone, and i was like, yeah right, hes in france, go away, and she said, no really, hes on the phone! so i had to get up ("had to" that sounds horrible! i wanted to!) and chatted to angy for nearly an hour. he was the one whod rung earlier and woken me up, so i felt a bit bad that i hadnt got up... ah well it was so good to hear from him! i cant wait till he gets back. and my jenn j... ]]> ~losersrule http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/7287705/ http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/7287705/ Mon, 12 Dec 2005 15:47:46 PST [Edit]ok, make that, wittle emmsy HAD a job and HAD a date... i guess on the brightside it solves a few minor problems... im sure ill tell u about it later.



wittle emmsy's going on a on monday.
dinner and the movies.







and shes scared sh*tless.
because she doesnt really like the guy that way.
but she does want to catch up with him.




HELP!!!

















]]> ~losersrule http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/7276247/ http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/7276247/ Sat, 10 Dec 2005 18:04:58 PST [Edit]wow... i shouldnt live in the city; way too much happens. at least in the country i only write journals every week or so, coz nothing that much happens!!!
well, i got a call from the owner of the chemist where i applied for work, and iv got the job (although i get the feeling i was the only one who applied! my aunt and i reckon hes probably a peodophile!! lol) so im here for at least 3 more weeks.
plus, i saw the lady who lives next door while i was down the street (shes the designer, who i babysat for a while a go) and she wants me to housesit for them while theyr on holidays, leaving on saturday, so thats exciting! all this potential money although, its all going in the bank, seeing as i found out when i got more money out today, that iv withdrawn nearly $700 this yr... i think thats mostly credit... id been saving so well before i got a phone... grrr.
ok, thats my exciting news... rather big edit, but ull live!


Moulin Rouge- Roxanne

how cute is the chrissie devART logo!!! totemo kawaii ne!!!

its so exciting, im writing this on my cousins rather hot apple iBook G4 (laptop). i love it!! and i love fast internet.
sadly tho, where i am sitting, i can see my reflection in the mirror, and especially distressing is/ are (?) the large bags under my eyes from last nights party. i cant believe my cousin is 18!!!! although, it was handy, having her to buy my alcohol for me!

Moulin Rouge- Nature Boy

so, from where i left off last time: exams are back, yr 11 orientation was bloody scary... times moving too fast, and i cant put up any breaks...
"the greatest thing, you'll ever learn, is just to love... and be loved in return"
so yeah. schools over for the year. prize giving was oh so exciting. i went up and got my books (the Collins student dictionary for my yr 10 academic award, and nick hornby's 'a long way down' for the rita weir award for drama 1/2.) and then sat down again, and was particularly bored. said goodbye to everyone, then slept most of the way to melbourne. arrived here about 1am. and got maybe 6 hours sleep before being woken by my oh so delightful cousin! went christmas shopping friday for my fam; ended the day with 2 tops, a phone charger, credit and mini pegs for myself, and nothing for anyone else. i hate buying for family...

Moulin Rouge- One Day I'll Fly Away

spent yesterday cooking and cleaning for the party... and what a party. i swear only maybe 6 people got up and danced all night, except when mambo no. 5 came on, and thats coz theyd all been in a production where theyd had a choreographed dance to it.... and there were no overly drunk people... country parties are much more fun! plus i was dead tired. so that was alright. caught up with a guy i had a massive crush on when i was in yr7, and hes still gorgeous!! we had a good chat; he wants to go into the police force, same as me, so that was really interetsing. he flew out to america today for five weeks, so im not going to get to see him again for ages, but it was good to see him. also met some other great people, although i dont remember any of their names!

Moulin Rouge- Your Song

i love summer!! this weather is so gorgeous! omg, although, i went down the street yesterday for lunch, and i swear i was out side for maybe an hour, and i got sunburnt on my neck, but only on one side!!! argh!!

i love this song soooo much.. and yes, i know im a hopeless romantic...

also yesterday, i was walking down the street with my aunt, and she saw a sign on the window of a chemist looking for casual christmas employees, and she said i should apply, so i have. if i get the job, ill be here in melb probably till mid jan. i probably wont get it coz i have no experience, but it was fun applying. iv never applied for a job before! it does mean that i miss my friends birthday party, and the meerlieu primary chrissie concert and i shall have to do a wholelot of holiday homework when i get back... but i... ]]> ~losersrule http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/7216926/ http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/7216926/ Sun, 04 Dec 2005 01:47:32 PST
well, fancy meeting you here. fancy fancy...
the ever exciting life of emm/losersrule/lois/george/grace/rooni/cave woman... whatever u know me as, continues...

as anyone who is also friends with the amazing roosh will know, we just got back from an amazing week together on camp; a week certainly i will not forget for a long time. the social side was definately great, mucking around with people iv hardly seen all year, but the most important thing for me was building a friendship with a guy who i have an amazing amount of respect and admiration for. i spent much of thursday in tears, and he helped me in so many ways, and he says he will continue to in any way.

Happy- Taxi Ride

anyway, seems im going backwards, so: on monday, before camp i had my flute exam. i didnt feel completely prepared, although i knew that was entirely my own fault, but nonetheless, its not much fun not feeling prepared. especially seeing as i learnt (or thought i learnt) six of my scales the day before. so i went in, and i made mistakes due to nerves, and i made mistakes due to being unprepared, but i did it. i walked out of that room buzzing, id done it!! i felt so good afterwards, but then i had the rest of the day to replay the hour in my mind, and the more i thought about it the more mistakes i rememebered. ie. i suck at aural. and i played half my sight reading in the wrong octave (how the hell did i manage that???).

Time Is Running Out- Muse

on camp we had to hand our phones in, so when i got it back on friday i was all excited to see my text messages... i got 1. a whole week without my phone, and i got one whole message. and it was from my mum.... although im assured sven tried to call me every night! anyway, the message from mum said my teacher had called and i got an A for my 6th grade flute exam. i was estatic! i couldnt believe it. i still dont. i honestly dont believe i deserve an A, and keep waiting for the call to say she got it wrong. people kept coming up to me saying "well done emm, u deserve it, u worked so hard for that" but i didnt. i mean, a week before, yeah, i worked my arse off, but 12 months before? nothing... all i can do is wait and see what my crit says.

Crutch- Matchbox 20

i just got back from a local performance of Handel's 'Messiah'. it was awesome. a friend of mine was playing organ, and he was amazing. i couldnt believe how beautiful the 'hallelujiah' chorus sounded... in fact, all the choruses... it was just so amazing. and i had one of the best seats in the cathedral; the family of the organist had saved us seats, which was lucky coz when we got there it was packed, (and anyone who knows the sale st pauls cathedral will understand thats a fair few people) so i was sitting in the front pew, right behind the solo flautist!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! it was sooo cool!! the poor guy would hardly have been heard more than 4 pews back, but he was awesome! id love the see a professional performance of it, i think it would just blow me away.

Maybe I- Five For Fighting

so... exams are all over. iv only got one back so far and thats english which i got a B for, which i can handle. especialy as i was expecting a C, i reallly didnt think it was a very good essay. i get the rest of my exam results tomorrow, tuesday is yr 11 orientation, then wednesdays activities day, where everyone gets ridiculously sunburnt when they bus us off to some random weir/ peir/ something. shoud be fun. thursday im not really sure whats happening, but thurs night is prize giving, which should be good, seeing as so many of my amazingly talented friends are receiving awards.

Feeling A Moment- Feeder

so that should just about fill you in for now. it was my darling cousins 18th on saturday, and im going up for her party this weekend, which should be good (if im lucky, her friend steven might be there... ) and then its holidays, which i am sooooooooooooo looking forward to. i have about 10 books that iv told myself i should read, plus holiday homework; which for jap is going to be a lot iv heard because our teacher this yr was crap and we rnt up to yr11 standard. oh yay. and mitchell has mentioned that we should catch up, and i might be seeing sven.. so im sure ill be busy. plus dads got work for me (spraying thistles. mindless, money paying work! excellent!! ) and i may be able to con my brother into taking me for a drive. can u believe iv had my liscence for nearly two months, and my mother still wont let me drive?!? grrrr....
~losersrule http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/7127506/ http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/7127506/ Wed, 23 Nov 2005 21:40:34 PST
almost a week ago now, my friend lost his mother suddenly, so there has been a fair bit of sadness surrounding him and his friends and family. hes such an amazing person, and i admire him for his courage and ability to smile. we love you gordo.

exams have been all this week. i had my last one today, and am very glad theyr over... nothing too stressful thankfully.

on the topic of exams, my flute exam is on monday. not completely satisfied with where im at, but i doubt i ever will be. will be glad when it too is over.

my yr 12 school friends had their valedictory last friday, and i was lucky enough to be able to be there with the choir. they all looked stunning and im sure they had a great night. it is sad to see them go, especially my "sister" alice. i love and respect her so so much.

my horsie is gone. some friends of ours have taken her on lease for six months, so its a bit different around here now. not that i can say iv really paid her much attention in recent months, but i still miss her.

am looking forward to upcoming holidays, give my mind a rest, although i am dreading the christmas comercialised stressing. basically, if you dont get a present or a card from me, dont be insulted... i am thinking of you all, i just hate that christmas has become a manufacturers dream rather than the family/ friends occasion it should be. sorry... one of my favourite rants!

also, if you feel i neglect you at all over the holidays, and want to catch up, give me a time/ date/ place (italy would be nice, but you're paying!), and ill try and be there... i tend to spend my entire holidays at home with my cds, so feel free to reintroduce me to the real world!

enough from me, enjoy your last weeks of school, or your first weeks of post-school, whichever category you happen to be in... and keep me posted as to what your up to...

love always em

p.s. a big thankyou to ~chosen-0ne for my new avitar(s)... they are all beautiful and iv taken a while deciding which one to use!!
and no mitchell, that does not mean iv forgotten your promise to make me one as well... im still waiting to see what you come up with!! ]]> ~losersrule http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/7013489/ http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/7013489/ Fri, 11 Nov 2005 18:15:04 PST
i love coming home after having a bad day to find that mum has put a vase of fresh flowers on my desk

i love my memories of barbeques in the bush with my family, using a plow disk and fire as a bbq

i love light summer rain

i love people playing with my hair

i love that music can alter my mood, no matter how sad/ angry etc i am

i love that a few words or a hug can change my day around

i love the fact that my brother and i get along so well, and that i miss him

i love people reading to me

i love the thought of love


i hate waking up in the middle of a dream, or waking and not knowing if it was a dream or a memory

i hate that im growing away from believing everything and being so carefree i could entertain myself for hours with imaginary friends

i hate that society doesnt approve of anyone older than 5 jumping in puddles

i hate the feeling in your throat when your about to cry, but your trying oh so hard not to

i hate saying goodbye

i hate that i have so little control over my feelings, my moods

i hate dissapointing anyone, but especially my dad

i hate that things have happened to my friends that i cant change, and that i cant stop the hurt

i hate earwigs

i hate the word hate


---
is it just me or do you get less page views when you don't have a subscription??

im really sick of my avitar... would someone like to make one for me? *insert battering of eyelids here* ]]> ~losersrule http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/6911532/ http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/6911532/ Sun, 30 Oct 2005 23:37:49 PST Inexperienced or shy
Should be on cloud nine
Instead I'm flooding aisle five



[Edit] for those who havnt heard, and didnt have the privlige of being there, the ball last night was a success, and we (i hope i can speak on behalf of most people) had an awesome time; great music, yummy food, awesome company, and we just danced the night away...

ok, some people seem to think i am random enough to have another whole 20 random facts to present. so here i go...

1. i am a hopless romantic: since the first time i saw Moulin Rouge, iv had an insane fantasy that one day a guy will sing "your song" to me. awwwww! (i know, i can hear u puking *puke*)

2. we once had a litter of pups that dad let me name, i named them: licka (he liked licking people), edger (she always ran on the edge of the road (???)) and pinka (the fur on her paws was kinda pink). hey, im a logical child ok!!

3. my favourite flowers are gerbras

4. an ex-boyfriend once gave me a stuffed turtle. man i love that turtle!

5. 2 weekends a yr i become 'nurse emma' and inject little (and big) lambies with 'vitamin b12 and selenium' and something else called 'ultravac'.

6. i was injecting lambs on the weekend, and it was so monotonous, i had a playlist running through my head:
blister in the sun
killing me softly
take me out
turn (by the corrs)
wifey
under my skin
never really loved you anyway...

thats all i can remember!!

7. i have a junior firearms liscence

8. my mum is an awesome cook, and up till my 10th birthday, she always made the most amazing birthday cakes for me, like a shoe house (as in from the nursery rhyme) or a pool filled with jelly, or a train... omg they were good.

9. one of my favourite places in the world is my room. its yellow, and i have photos of my friends and family all over the walls... and i have a funky bed!!

10. i would love to be able to play the harp

11. i once stepped on a brown snake

12. i cant eat spicy food

13. i was randomly given a Whitlams album today i love the whitlams

14. "there are plenty more fish in the sea, but it seems im out of bait"

15. as andrew has already said, there is nothing sexier than a good scent. after shave/ deo/ cologne, i dont care, as long as its yummy!

16. my brother and i used to compete in speech and drama eisteddfods, and we'd always do mime duets. and we always won!

17. it is november tomorrow. yay!

18. i used to have teeth along the lines of Freddie Mercury (r.i.p.). thankgod for braces!!

19. iv found my romeo.
(hes stolen the computer chair to sleep on tho... lazy cat!)

20. it would appear that i am indeed random enough to have 40 random facts written about me. sorry simone, i didnt go to 34... but happy birthday!!!! ]]> ~losersrule http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/6815690/ http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/6815690/ Thu, 20 Oct 2005 04:13:28 PDT
much thanks to =GreatGreenDragon for the fun i have had with my sub for the last 3 months... twas so exciting!

congrats to all vic yr12ies (ie ~Mitchellw and ~chosen-0ne) who have no more classes ever, i cant imagine how your feeling now. wait, seeing as its 9pm, ur probably all trashed, so maybe its not so hard to imagine good luck with all your exams. much love to you all.

no real updates from me... i should know on monday when my flute exam is, and from there i can arange my exams around it (hopefully)
oh, and i found that i probably have a clash next yr between jap and theatre studies... and i really have no idea which one i'll choose.... but i havnt been summoned by the head of curriculum yet, so i live in hope.

continuous good luck to my loverly nswian friends who are doing their hsc atm, tho of course, they are way too busy studying to be on here

might be off to a party sat night whichll be good, i need a good dance! other than that, im just stressing about our play for tuesday. we had dress rehearsal today, and, appart from the fact we still dont have half our props, and the techies dont have a script to work off, the only thing that went wrong is that em fainted on stage... not good. she spent yesterday in hospital, and only come to school today for our rehearsal (and now i feel bad coz she probably only came in so i wouldnt go spaz coz she has all the costumes...)

anywho, this was meant to be short, i need sleep... night! xo

]]> ~losersrule http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/6778189/ http://losersrule.deviantart.com/journal/6778189/ Sat, 15 Oct 2005 20:46:28 PDT jacksbowel, i have succumbed to the temptation. (basically because its much more interesting that writing out what different soils are made up of for geography... blah!!

20 Random Facts About Me:

1. I really cannot stand songs that fade out at the end. it will often cause me to hate the song, even if i liked it halfway thru!

2. i think accoustic guitar is incredibly sexy

3. i have obsessions for: anything rainbow (but it must be 'proper' rainbow), dice, gerbras, the number 3, white chocolate, eyebrow piercings, green, spots, stripes, romance, heath ledger (i once had 133 pictures/ articles about him on my wall... is that obsessive?? )

4. I stayed in a hotel in Tokyo that had fleas in the beds. at least, thats what i think they were... they sure knew how to bite!!

5. I have morals and beliefs that dont make sense

6. when i was in grade 5, my friend hatty and i managed a band. until the band members walked out on us one by one about a week after we started! we had a song and everything!! we were awesome hatty!

7. my middle name is Grace, and i love it

8. most people would cringe (or laugh hysterically) if they saw my cd collection

9. my blood type is A-

10. i did ballet for 7 yrs, until i tore ligaments in my left ankle trying to run in platform shoes. i never went back to dance, but i still have all my concert costumes; a lion, a flower, an indian, a jellyfish...

11. I met a friend of mine from England on a cricket website. the site was dedicated to paying respects to steve waugh who had just retired, and some idiot had written a message bagging out brett lee, so i messaged him and told him this wasnt the place for his stupid comments, and dan (my friend) emailed me and said he agreed, blah di blah di blah. and we all lived happily ever after...

12. my friends organised a surprise birthday party for my 14th birthday

13. my dad is a dj. and a farmer, but dj sounds so much more exciting!

14. my step-cousins names are Fern and Clover

15. for my 18th birthday i want to have a hot air balloon ride over melbourne at sunrise with a champagne breakfast

16. i once had a dream that i met a 19yr old guy called Daniel, and he had short, dark brown hair, green eyes and drove a white BMW.i found out that description fits my friends brother who iv never met...

17. my brother was born with the umbilical cord around his neck and his face had turned blue. hes still super smart tho, dammit!!!

18. i wear clothes from my dress up box and my dads wardrobe in public

19. in kinder i had a crush on a boy named jake. thats about all i remember from kinder!

20. David Whenham smiled at me!!!!


wow, i really am quite random...

]]> ~losersrule