deviantART: by:mindbodygraphics

deviantART: by:mindbodygraphics http://search.deviantart.com/?q=by:mindbodygraphics&section=today deviantART RSS for by:mindbodygraphics en-us Copyright 2009, deviantART.com Wed, 25 Nov 2009 05:08:28 PST deviantART.com http://blogs.law.harvard.edu/tech/rss http://s.deviantart.com/minish/widgets/apple-touch-icon-precomposed.png Refreshed ^___^ http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/28559078/ http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/28559078/ Tue, 24 Nov 2009 23:08:34 PST

Ahhhhh........

Nothing like seeing an empty inbox.

Of course, this will only last for a few hours, but it's nice while it lasts.
I remember years ago, waiting weeks for a message in my inbox, hoping that one would come soon. Now I can't wait for them to stop! lol
It's a mixed up, muddled up, shook up world. <3

More photos to come. I'm feeling a bit lazy.

]]> =mindbodygraphics I wonder... http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/28385662/ http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/28385662/ Sun, 15 Nov 2009 22:13:32 PST

Does anyone say "woot" anymore? (w00t or w007 or VV007 in various forms of leet or l337 speak)

]]> =mindbodygraphics Disregards. http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/28176023/ http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/28176023/ Fri, 06 Nov 2009 09:58:23 PST

Nevermind that last journal.

Also, I'm done bitching.

I've had my time to scream and rant and rave, now it's time to move on.

]]> =mindbodygraphics You've got to be kidding me... http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/28170666/ http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/28170666/ Thu, 05 Nov 2009 22:25:49 PST

This can't be real, and if it is, I feel sorry for the ignorant bastard who is too blinded by "the lord" to see what an idiot he is.
[link]

]]> =mindbodygraphics Wake up and smell the BULLSHIT!!!!!!!!! http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/28143858/ http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/28143858/ Wed, 04 Nov 2009 14:08:29 PST

For anyone that believes in "Traditonal Family Values" please watch this video. You might learn something.

To all of you who don't believe in this bullshit tradition, please pass this video around.

[link]

]]> =mindbodygraphics RAPED BY OUR SO CALLED FELLOW MAN http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/28135488/ http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/28135488/ Wed, 04 Nov 2009 00:12:20 PST

I'm on the verge of tears. One year later and nothing has changed. I'm yet again forced to watch our rights get RAPED. What hurts the most is that my parents and all the people I grew up with and said they cared about me are supporting anti-gay marriage laws.
All I can do is hang my head in shame an defeat once again, and continue to march on, carrying my brothers and sisters with me who are wounded as well.
WE WILL NEVER GIVE UP!!!! DO YOU FUCKING HEAR ME???!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

]]> =mindbodygraphics I further prove my point: http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/28115997/ http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/28115997/ Mon, 02 Nov 2009 21:25:23 PST

Just pathetic.

]]> =mindbodygraphics One good reason http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/28062464/ http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/28062464/ Sat, 31 Oct 2009 09:38:34 PDT

Normally, I don't complain about the high volume of bad daily deviations, especially since I was so kindly and undeservingly awarded with one last year (honored as I am, personally I don't think it's good enough to be a DD).
But I just couldn't take it anymore after I saw this today:

There is nothing special about this photo other than the fact that she has her tits out.
I tried hard to find something DD worthy of this photo, but as I studied the photo and browsed through the comments, I realized that the people who are most enjoying this are the guys getting a stiffy from seeing a naked woman carve a pumpkin.
I could understand the decision if perhaps the photo were well done, or had some spark of life in it, but it's a very plain dull picture that anyone with Polaroid could shoot.
The daily deviations are littered with nudes that are claimed to be chosen because of how incredibly artistic they are, but we all know its bullshit to cover up the fact that the only reason it was featured is because it's erotic to some.
Now. I'm not saying nudes are bad. Take a quick browse through my favorites and you'll see how much I enjoy the nudes, BUT there are an enormous amount of them that are really unnecessary to feature as a DD.

If someone can give me one GOOD reason as to why this should be featured, then I'll shut up, pack up my soapbox and go have a soak in the tub.

PS: Before you start screaming at me, I must tell you that I'm NOT against the artist that took this. I think his work is good for what it is, and still rather unique. It's THIS ONE PHOTO that I'm talking about, NOT the artist himself. Thank you. You may resume the stone throwing.

]]> =mindbodygraphics *doublesigh* http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/27920638/ http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/27920638/ Fri, 23 Oct 2009 10:12:24 PDT

Neveranytimeneveranytimeneveranytimeanyt imetimetime......

]]> =mindbodygraphics I saw the north star tonight. http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/27496500/ http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/27496500/ Tue, 29 Sep 2009 23:27:02 PDT

*sigh*
Trying to plan for the National Equality March is driving me crazy.
It's less than two weeks away and they barely have their press info together.

I don't need this stress.

And I'm too lazy to clear my inbox right now. I'll get a jump on it later.

]]> =mindbodygraphics Two whole days of phlegm! :D http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/27305643/ http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/27305643/ Sat, 19 Sep 2009 18:14:20 PDT

I've been stuck in this damn apartment for two days with some sort of illness, most likely a cold.
But as they say, when god gives you aids, make lemonaids!

Because I've been locked up (and shunned from the world LOL) I was able to get a ton of work done!!

So, I'm sorry if I've blown up your inbox with my submissions. Heads up, there's still more to come.

ja ne!

]]> =mindbodygraphics Forever http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/27007161/ http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/27007161/ Fri, 04 Sep 2009 00:06:35 PDT

I wish I knew where you were. Perhaps you're right in front of me. But it feels like you're a million miles away, and I'll never be able to find you.

]]> =mindbodygraphics Slice o' Life comin' atcha!! http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/26559147/ http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/26559147/ Wed, 12 Aug 2009 23:02:56 PDT

I've been ignoring this site.
My messages were piling up and becoming more and more daunting.

My work was being shifted, backlogged and forgotten.

I was wasting my time with someone who I thought loved me. But no tears will be wasted on stupid little boys.

Anyway, I'm back........ish.
I've been trying to balance work, friends, my new blog, side jobs, and my gallery.
It will be some time still until I'm back on here like I used to be.

For now, I've at least cleared the message box of over a thousand.

<3

]]> =mindbodygraphics CIVIL DISOBEDIENCE: SAN FRANCISCO http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/26108043/ http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/26108043/ Wed, 22 Jul 2009 12:30:54 PDT

On July 30th, we will descend, in force, on the US Army recruiting office located at 670 Davis Street in San Francisco. We will rally in front of the office and make our message heard. We will picket the office and make it as difficult as possible for people to enter and exit the recruiting facility and do everything in our power to turn individuals away from that office. When forced to leave, we will proceed to the intersection of Broadway & Embarcadero streets where we will stage an intersection sit-in to get the message across that we will no longer tolerate the government's inaction while our civil rights and our dignity continue to be attacked. We will keep Davis & Broadway closed until we are arrested. Together we will peacefully stand in solidarity for Lt. Col. Fehrenbach, Lt. Choi and every other soldier who has been wrongly victimized and discriminated against under the guise of legality because of Washington cowardice.

Please see the full story here: [link]

]]> =mindbodygraphics TOMORROW: OPERATION SHINE http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/25850995/ http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/25850995/ Fri, 10 Jul 2009 00:26:31 PDT

Operation Shine
July 10th, 2009

A meeting, march and rally in the Castro to highlight the need for services and care for queer homeless youth.

Information can be found pridewalk2009.org

I'll be there tomorrow in San Francisco with my camera, love and support.
I hope to see you there too.

<3

]]> =mindbodygraphics A day for freedom and independence? http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/25742658/ http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/25742658/ Sat, 04 Jul 2009 21:01:41 PDT

I've decided not to celebrate the 4th of July today.
For those of you who aren't familiar with the holiday, July 4th is the day that marks America's independence from the tyrannical British rule and the foundation of the country. It's a habitual celebration of the "freedom" of Americans.
Well, I don't feel free.
Being a bi-sexual male, I don't have the freedom to get married to a man that I love. I can marry a woman, sure, but that wouldn't satisfy me (ask any of my friends and they'll vouch for me).
I can be called all kinds of hateful things, violently threatened, and physically attacked by a vast majority of religious people (moonies, christians and mormons, oh my!) for being myself and it can be defended as righteous by many of our so-called fair judges, but dare I say one thing back and I'm slandered as being a bigot and not allowing them their religious freedom.
If I wanted to join the military (which thank anyone I don't), I must live in fear and hiding lest I be found out and forcibly and shamefully removed, while being verbally and physically assaulted by other army "members" (and they can stand defended in their actions because the military hates "fags").
If a same sex couple are together in this country but one of them is foreign, they are denied a green card solely for the fact that they're gay.

And another troubling thing:
I may soon be fined $1000 or more for not having health insurance.
Luckily I do have it through my work, but what if I didn't? Or what if I had to move jobs or was fired and couldn't afford to get a plan? The government claims that there will be help for people who can't afford, but we've all seen how well our government treats it's poor.
If I remember correctly, they're whole basis of defense on this is that it will make sure that 95% of Americans have health coverage and that the fines from people not having it will raise $35 billion towards the healthcare system! As if the f**king medical system doesn't have enough! Doctors are paid ridiculous wages while nurses are handed peanuts!! Pharmaceutical companies are making out like bandits because of enormous profit margins and almost none of that goes into helping the hospitals. Our wonderful government wants us to pay them skyrocket fines because they're no good at balancing their own budget!
How does that make me free? How does that make anyone free?

They try to sugar coat things and give what I like to call "soft excuses" for their decisions, but the truth is because THIS COUNTRY AND THIS GOVERNMENT DOESN'T GIVE A S**T ABOUT OTHER PEOPLE'S RIGHTS UNLESS THEY ARE THREATENED.
We are a country who are scared of their government. It's the leadership who should be scared. If we are in constant fear of what they might to to us, then they have all the power to take away any rights they want.
And they are.
Little by little, under the radar, little things are slowly slipping away as the government gets more in to debt and holds more power over us.

We aren't free.
Not a single one of us.

So why should I celebrate the "freedom" of America when I, nor anyone is really free?

Because it's what we do.
Because it's habit.
Because we're blind.

]]> =mindbodygraphics Beta testing, portfolios, and whathaveyou... http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/25707789/ http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/25707789/ Fri, 03 Jul 2009 02:10:47 PDT

Good g*d beta products are frustrating.

As much as I want this portfolio, I don't know if I can go through the pain of trying to put the buggy thing together.

I dunno. Other people seem to be doing alright...

Perhaps I just fail.

]]> =mindbodygraphics Someday Soon http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/25611591/ http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/25611591/ Sun, 28 Jun 2009 16:44:08 PDT

This whole Pride weekend was a disaster. I've failed and made a complete ass of myself.
As I'm coming back in to the calm, there's one song that resonates strongly with me:

[link]

KT Tunstall
"Someday Soon"
I think it's time to put myself away
Seek out a little silence
Close the doors and sit a while
And walk a little
And as I put my words away
The flow slows
See this penny in the stream,
Pickin' it up is easy.

Follow the shape of it,
Jump in,
Swallow it whole,
Jump in,

Even though I know my around
Possibly there's something that I found
Holdin' on for fun on solid ground
Someday soon,
Someday soon.

Gonna turn myself into the grass,
And I'll grow.
Take this space above my head
I'll never live a little.

Gonna wear my feather-head dress
Like an Indian chief.
Gonna stretch out both my arms
I'm gonna test the temperature.

Follow the taste of it,
Jump in,
Swallow it whole,
Jump in,

Even though I know my way around,
Possibly there's something new I've found,
Holdin' on for fun on solid ground,
Oh oh oh

Even though I know my way around,
Possibly there's something new I've found,
Holdin' on for fun on solid ground
Someday soon,
Someday soon.

And I'll walk a little,
Someday soon.

Thanks to you my friends who left comments on the last journal. I don't know how to respond to them so I'm doing it here.

I'll be alright.
I'm just stuck.

]]> =mindbodygraphics What a fucking awful day... http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/25557137/ http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/25557137/ Fri, 26 Jun 2009 01:34:16 PDT

Late to work.
Hung over.
Shipment got fucked up.
Items were damaged.
MJ dead.
Manager's relative dead.
Many more dead in Iran.
Many many more dead elsewhere in the world.
Inventory snuck up on me.
Ruined yet another friend's relationship because I have no self control and no conscience.
Feel like my stomach is trying to eat it's way out of my body.
Can't sleep.
Apartment is a mess.
Can't exercise.
Can't stop gaining weight.
Can't stop drugs.
Can't stop drinking.
Can't save any money.
Can't figure it out.

Excuse me while I go vomit.

]]> =mindbodygraphics The Road To Equality: New Blog! http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/25385547/ http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/25385547/ Thu, 18 Jun 2009 01:44:54 PDT

I started a blog as a better place to display the photos and coverage I've been doing of the Gay Rights events:

w w w . r o a d t o e q u a l i t y . b l o g s p o t . c o m

I decided that trying to put all the photos up on deviantart was just way too much of a hassle. I'll still put my best shots up here, but the majority of them will be on that blog instead.

I'm still trying to cut through these damn messages. It's so hard when I have no time. But perhaps this weekend I can finally get through them all. As it currently stands, I have 460 Deviations and 194 Messages.

Soon.
Someday soon my plate will be clean.

...Hopefully it will be clean before the new Zelda game comes out...

Goodnight loves!

[PS: I can't seem to change the mood, so ignore it.]

]]> =mindbodygraphics Glad to be back, but...... http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/25208623/ http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/25208623/ Tue, 09 Jun 2009 00:15:26 PDT

JOURNALS!!!!!!!! SO MANY F**KING JOURNALS!!!!!!

42 pages of journals to go through.

The 500 or so deviations aren't as difficult as they go quicker, but my god this is just getting ridiculous!!

And there's more every day.

>_<

I suppose I can't complain though, what with being gone for like 2 months.

UGH!

I never thought I'd say it, but..............

I HATE COMPUTERS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

One big pain in the ass.

More photos from the "Meet In The Middle" are on the way.

So many photos to get through too.....
Two months worth.........

]]> =mindbodygraphics Home at long last!!! http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/25062247/ http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/25062247/ Mon, 01 Jun 2009 01:42:20 PDT

It's such a relief to be back on DA!!! ^_^
I finally got myself a new computer:

........with a very nice 23" sony monitor from Pixar Animation Studios!!!

Got it through a friend of mine who got it through a friend of his who took a bunch of "old" stuff off of Pixar's hands. lol
The computer is pretty nice too. Home built is the best kind now-a-days.
My poor little lappy.....HP wanted $400 to fix it!!!! Well f**k that.

ANYWAY!
ON TO MORE IMPORTANT BUSINESS!!!

Over the past couple of months I've been throwing myself into the Gay Rights (specifically marriage rights) movement.
I went to the protesting of the CA courts decision to uphold the Prop 8 marriage ban, and more recently the "Meet In The Middle 4 Equality" protest/rally/march. [link]
And in October I'll be headed out to Washington DC to march and take photos.

I'll be putting photos up just as soon as I get some time to settle myself and get things organized around here (which should be a few days)

In the mean time, here's some previews:

March against court ruling on Prop 8 in SF

Meet in the Middle 4 Equality

I've got hundreds of messages (especially journals) to sort through on here.
I'll get in done fairly soon, most likely by the end of thursday or friday. Please forgive me if I haven't been able to keep in contact.

]]> =mindbodygraphics Status Update #2 http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/24806846/ http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/24806846/ Sun, 17 May 2009 14:31:42 PDT

Computer still down.
Will be sending it out for repairs soon.

Single again. I can't handle a relationship right now. Single is treating me just fine.

My inbox is ridiculously full, and I can't do a damn thing about it. T_T

Soon......

]]> =mindbodygraphics Status Update http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/24523088/ http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/24523088/ Thu, 30 Apr 2009 23:15:47 PDT

Busy.
Lots of photo work to do.
Dayjob is wearing me down.
Running around all over the place.

Frustrated.
Computer is damaged. Can't use it. Needs repairs.
Borrowing my boyfriend's spare laptop for work. No time or means to submit anything new to DA. Don't know when I'll get it fixed

Angered.
Money is tighter than it's ever been.
Government wants a lot of my money.
So does the landlord, sprint, comcast, hostmonster, etc...
Overtime and raises have been cut at work until next year.

Loved.
Have a new boyfriend. Amazingly sweet guy. Seems almost perfect.

Confused.
Not sure how I feel about being in a relationship. Don't know if I really want it or if I can handle it.

]]> =mindbodygraphics Impossible to keep up http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/24016574/ http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/24016574/ Thu, 02 Apr 2009 01:25:14 PDT

My message board just gets bigger and bigger everyday.
If I neglect it for 2 days, I have 30some messages, which motivates me less to check through all of them (most of them journals). In turn, more just pile up and up.

*sigh*

]]> =mindbodygraphics My tail is all springy! http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/23795537/ http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/23795537/ Fri, 20 Mar 2009 11:53:00 PDT

Happy first day of spring from Me and Pikachu!!!! <3

Go out and enjoy the day anyway you can, even if you're at work!!

^_^

]]> =mindbodygraphics You gotta be strong, hold on, and love yourself http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/23583494/ http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/23583494/ Sat, 07 Mar 2009 22:44:51 PST

I discovered a wonderful new person last night.
Her name is Tasha [Yoon Mi Rae ì¤ë¯¸ë]. She's a Korean hip-hop artist who grew up in Korea under heavy persecution for being a mixed race.
When I heard this song I was blown away and so incredibly inspired.

Now, I have a lot of bad feelings when I hear Korean or think about Korea because of my experience being raised in the Moonies, but this song and this wonderful person actually helped to break my frustration and anger with most things Korean.
I HIGHLY recommend listening: [link]

Tasha - Black Happiness
ì¤ë¯¸ë(T) - ê²ì íë³µ

My skin was dark from my past
People used to point at me
Even at my mom Even at my dad who was black, and in the army
People whisper behind my back
Said this and said that
I always had tears in my eyes
Although I was young
I saw my mother's sadness

Everything
seemed like it was my fault
Because of my guilt
I washed my face everytime during the day
With my tears I melt the white soap
I always hated my dark skin
why O why
Does the world judge me
When I hate the world
I close my eyes

I put my soul into the music my father gave me
I feel the volume
And fly higher and higher
Far away
la musique

(When I hate the world)
(Music soothes me)
(you gotta hold on)
(and love yourself)
(When I hate the world)
(Music raises me up)
(so you gotta be strong)
(you gotta hold on)
(and love yourself)

Time passed and I was thirteen
My skin was dark brown
Music doesn't judge color
They give me light
I lead my music
We lean on eachother
I don't feel lonely
Then one day
I was given a chance
I held on to my microphone

And suddenly I was on stage
I say goodbye to music and ask it to come back
Then I became nineteen
I have to lie
I put white makeup over my face
They told me to wear a mask
They said my mom's race was okay
But not my dad's
Every year my age was nineteen
During times when time stopped

I felt like I was in jail
And I leaned on myself
I spent endless, painful days
I ignored their warnings
And because I missed music
I tried to escape
But no, I got caught
I prayed all night
And now I'm free

]]> =mindbodygraphics God's Girls http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/23114055/ http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/23114055/ Tue, 10 Feb 2009 02:22:11 PST

So on Friday I shot my very first set for GodsGirls.com with my friend Kat.
For being my first such shoot, I think the shots came out pretty good. We're sorting through them now and getting ready to send them off to the company. Hopefully if they like the work I did, they might hire me. It could potentially be a high possibility since there aren't any GG photographers in the bay area (which is pretty shocking actually), they're all down in LA.
The whole experience was actually pretty inspiring! It was refreshing to be doing something else, something new that had to make me think about the shot quite a bit before hand and not just constant mostly arbitrary shooting that I did at raves. It also got my imagination flowing about how to set up shots, backdrops, lighting, and general ideas for shoot themes. I learned a lot from it.

I wanted to share a few shots with you, but before I do I need to state that THESE IMAGES ARE NOT FOR DISTRIBUTION!! If I find that someone has posted these pictures anywhere else or used them in any way, they will be getting a nasty letter from me and my lawyer (yes, I have one, so don't even test it).
Reason being is that even though I took these pictures and they haven't been sent out yet, they technically belong in most part to Kat and God's Girls and therefore the responsibility falls on me to make sure they're not sent around.

Ok. Disclaimer done.

When the full set is up on GG I will let you know.
Unfortunately it won't be free, but that's the territory that comes with shooting for porn sites. LOL
It was so much fun! I'm totally excited for the next shoot; I can't wait!

]]> =mindbodygraphics All Things Must Pass http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/22910799/ http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/22910799/ Fri, 30 Jan 2009 18:56:39 PST

February 28th, 2009 will be the very last rave that I shoot.

(...I hope...)

I'm done. I can't handle it anymore.
And I had a good run. Participating for 2 years and shooting for 1. But it's time to stop.

And I'm sad, but happy as well. I'll be getting myself back on track, and things will be better. I certainly will miss a lot of people, and the popularity and high status that comes with it.

And it doesn't mean to say that I'm quiting photography. I'm just going to go off in another direction.
For example, I'm going to start doing a few shoots for God's Girls [link] and Suicide Girls [link] thanks to friends I made in the rave scene.
And a few other misc jobs have opened up here and there, so I'm not too upset.

When March rolls around, I hope to change weegerphotography.com to be my personal photography business site, and no longer for raves.
If anyone would like to give me some site designing tips or tricks, please feel free, as I am just about HTML illiterate.

]]> =mindbodygraphics It was our song... http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/22664082/ http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/22664082/ Sun, 18 Jan 2009 23:31:05 PST

Love of mine some day you will die
But I'll be close behind
I'll follow you into the dark

No blinding light or tunnels to gates of white
Just our hands clasped so tight
Waiting for the hint of a spark
If Heaven and Hell decide
That they both are satisfied
Illuminate the NOs on their vacancy signs

If there's no one beside you
When your soul embarks
Then I'll follow you into the dark

It was our song.
I only wish it had stayed true.
It would hurt less to know that I lost him to an unpreventable cause, rather than to know that he just didn't love me anymore.

"We don't love each other anymore"
But I still did. I still do.

Two years. Two of the most wonderful years of my life spent with what became my best friend, and in one night we became complete strangers.

I can't stand it.
I want to scream.
I want to collapse.
I want to tear my heart out and throw it out.
I want to flood it all out.

I had forgotten how much of a mess I am without someone to fall back on.

Where is he?
Why must there be the long drawn out wait?
Why can't he come and take my hand.
Lift me out of the cracks in the floor.
I'm stuck.
I can't get out on my own.

Help.

I still love him. And I don't want to anymore.

]]> =mindbodygraphics FACE! http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/22530844/ http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/22530844/ Sun, 11 Jan 2009 17:57:57 PST

I got smacked in the eye with a ball last night.

So what else is new?

]]> =mindbodygraphics Just got back from... http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/22498756/ http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/22498756/ Sat, 10 Jan 2009 02:15:28 PST

...yet another rave.

-__-

Ugh.

This mess is wearing me down.

Today was terrible. I had to cover someone's shift crazy early in the morning. Then I was late to several appointments, had to run a bunch of errands, had this party to shoot tonight, and to top it all off: my recent ex boyfriend was there.

AND I HAVE TO GET UP IN A FEW SHORT HOURS FOR WORK!!!!

I'm sick of this.

]]> =mindbodygraphics I love you Miyavi http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/22423169/ http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/22423169/ Mon, 05 Jan 2009 20:08:52 PST

I truly do.

â¥

]]> =mindbodygraphics It speaks to me in ways that frighten http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/22250712/ http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/22250712/ Sun, 28 Dec 2008 21:15:04 PST

Crazy, but thats how it goes
Millions of people living as foes
Maybe its not to late
To learn how to love
And forget how to hate

Mental wounds not healing
Lifes a bitter shame
Im going off the rails on a crazy train

Ive listened to preachers
Ive listened to fools
Ive watched all the dropouts
Who make their own rules
One person conditioned to rule and control
The media sells it and you have the role

Mental wounds still screaming
Driving me insane
Im going off the rails on a crazy train

I know that things are going wrong for me
You gotta listen to my words

Heirs of a cold war
Thats what weve become
Inheriting troubles Im mentally numb
Crazy, I just cannot bear
Im living with something that just isnt fair

Mental wounds not healing
Who and whats to blame
Im going off the rails on a crazy train

]]> =mindbodygraphics I had a dream... http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/22151679/ http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/22151679/ Tue, 23 Dec 2008 21:31:39 PST

....and there he was.

we just stared.

When will this lonely heart cease?

]]> =mindbodygraphics STOLEN ARTWORK!!! http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/22100810/ http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/22100810/ Sun, 21 Dec 2008 10:57:30 PST

It has come to light that yesterday's DD on

was actually a piece that had been stolen from

~Iamno-Scientist a mere 10 days after she had posted it:

It's incredibly shameful that people can do this.

I want you all who favorited this work to remove it from your favorites and give love to the original artist who deserves so much better than this bullshit.

Also, please do not blame

^FaMz for this mess. She was just as tricked as the rest of us were and I'm confident that she's working to give credit to the rightful owner!

]]> =mindbodygraphics I hate... http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/21938261/ http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/21938261/ Thu, 11 Dec 2008 20:18:39 PST

...being alone.

]]> =mindbodygraphics I'm so sorry. http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/21835135/ http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/21835135/ Fri, 05 Dec 2008 17:00:32 PST

To all of you who favorited my DD "Conjurer Of Love", I am deeply grateful and I'm sorry that I can't tell you all personally.

I wanted to stop by everyone's page and tell them thank you for enjoying it, but the messages just kept piling up and I wasn't even making a dent.

So again, I'm sorry that I can't reply to you all.

]]> =mindbodygraphics LOGO CONTEST WINNERS!!! http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/21776630/ http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/21776630/ Tue, 02 Dec 2008 00:15:31 PST

The contest is over!!

It was incredibly hard to decide between all the entries I got. I truly did love them all, and it seems unfair to have to leave people out of it, but after all it is a contest and I can only choose so much.

Anyway.

SECOND PLACE GOES TO:

FIRST PLACE GOES TO:

Many congratulations to the winners, and MANY MORE congratulations to all those who entered. I'm truly grateful.

]]> =mindbodygraphics HEEEEEEELLLLLPP!!!! http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/21681365/ http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/21681365/ Wed, 26 Nov 2008 22:23:38 PST

My message box is OVERFLOWING!!!!

At this current moment, I have 460 messages.
By the time I post this, most likely it will be up to somewhere around 475.

........this is gonna take a while.....

----edit----
10:22p.m.
Ok, this is starting to get out of hand:

]]> =mindbodygraphics Logo Contest Update!!! http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/21598024/ http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/21598024/ Fri, 21 Nov 2008 13:44:03 PST

Ok so there's only 9 days left in the contest for my new logo!!
(original announcement: [link])

Here are the entries so far:

--

=kalmee Also submitted two entries, but they seem to be missing.

To be quite honest, I was hoping for more entries, but I still love all of the ones that were sent in! And THERE'S STILL TIME LEFT!!!! So you if you have an idea or are still working on one let me know! If you need extra time, I just might be able to loosen up the deadline for you.

Again, here's what you guys are competing for:

1st place - A full one year subscription to DeviantArt and a signed print of your choice (excluding canvas prints) from my account.

2nd place - 6 month subscription to DeviantArt.

Good luck to you all!

]]> =mindbodygraphics PLEASE WATCH THIS AND PASS IT ALONG! http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/21459535/ http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/21459535/ Wed, 12 Nov 2008 18:35:41 PST

[link]

Let love be free

]]> =mindbodygraphics All raved out http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/21418854/ http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/21418854/ Mon, 10 Nov 2008 10:29:39 PST

Oh good lord. This being up for hours and hours shooting raves is taking it's toll on me.
I still enjoy it, but god I am worn out. O_______O

On another subject, I'm feeling alot better thanks to a certain someone who's coming to visit me for a few days....

I'll be updating the status of my contest in a few days. I've got tons of pictures to cut through. *laaaame*

Well thats about all the time we have for today, but stay tuned for scenes from our next episode!

]]> =mindbodygraphics days http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/21381410/ http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/21381410/ Sat, 08 Nov 2008 00:24:13 PST

when you ache for the pain to come
and yet you feel nothing at all
you shouldn't want the pain
but it feels so good
so good

a bittersweet symphony of emotions

whats happening to me

]]> =mindbodygraphics A bittersweet day of victory and turmoil http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/21347930/ http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/21347930/ Wed, 05 Nov 2008 19:42:45 PST

As the polls close we see what kind of people truly surround us.

In this pocket of opportunity we call the bay area, so much love it shown towards ones that are different in efforts to make us the same.

So much love surrounds us all that we are blinded to see the hate that spews from the rest of the world.

Today Californians have shown the true nature of what they really are. Fear and ignorance plague the hearts of those who have been raised to lower others for the purpose of "purity" and "tradition". They claim to cater to one who is all knowing and all loving and in turn spread the "good word" of peace and love. Yet these people know nothing of the love of which they speak. Equality for all is merely reserved for those who abide by the laws and words of the magic man behind the curtain. Claiming to love and accept, they manipulate and brainwash the young, abandon the different, and torture nay sayers. And despite all the evidence of their wrong doing, they truly believe that by denying the rights of others and keeping the status quo that they are doing the "work of god".

It is truly sad how blind some people can be.

Today we were battered. Beaten, raped, and crammed into a box labled "sub-human", the gay community was at the unfortunate end of a devastating blow.

They have denied us our rights before. And they're doing it again.

WE MUST NOT LET THEM PREVAIL!!!!
LET IT BE KNOWN THAT A WAR IS UPON US! A WAR AGAINST US. AGAINST THOSE WHO DON'T "FIT THE STANDARD". A NEW WAVE OF CIVIL RIGHTS MOVEMENTS ARE DEVELOPING! WE MUST STAND UP FOR OUR RIGHTS AND NOT LET THEM TAKE EVERYTHING FROM US! IF NOT FOR OUR SELFS, THEN FOR ANYONE ANYWHERE WHO HAS EVER FELT THE PAIN OF BEING "DIFFERENT", THE SORROW OF BEING ABANDONED BY THE ONES WHO HAD CLAIMED TO LOVE THEM.

NOW IS THE TIME FOR ALL PEOPLE TO UNITE, NO MATTER OUR DIFFERENCES!!

A new leader has risen in the USA. A man who speaks of bringing together all people. Let us not look at him as a profit, or idolize him. But instead lets see this man as an opportunity to bring change for the good.

With his help, perhaps we can be on the way to becoming a world where there are no differences, that we just ARE.

Let love be free.

--------------------------
Just a quick reminder about the contest:
[link]

]]> =mindbodygraphics CONTEST FOR A NEW LOGO!!!!! http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/21240799/ http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/21240799/ Thu, 30 Oct 2008 23:19:59 PDT

The logo for my event photo site is a little bit drab:

So I need someone to spice it up!
Repair! Revamp! Revise! Renew!

The rules to this contest are simple:
It must contain either the word "weeger" or at least the letter "W".
Everything else is up to you.

To submit your entry, you can either send it to me in a note, or email it to me at weegerproductions@gmail.com

CONTEST STARTS TODAY (OCTOBER 30TH) AND ENDS ON NOVEMBER 30TH. ONE MONTH.

And of course

PRIZES:

1st place - A full one year subscription to DeviantArt and a signed print of your choice (excluding canvas prints) from my account.

2nd place - 6 month subscription to DeviantArt.

I'll be looking forward to seeing your entries!

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaand........GO!!!

]]> =mindbodygraphics LOL CAUGHT! http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/21179313/ http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/21179313/ Sun, 26 Oct 2008 22:16:05 PDT

[link]
You can see me sneak in onstage at about the 20 second mark.
Shots are here:
[link]

]]> =mindbodygraphics Surreal http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/21162514/ http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/21162514/ Sat, 25 Oct 2008 21:27:37 PDT

Everything feels weird.
It's like I'm on a very powerful mind altering drug.

Nothing is the same. Nothing feels right.

My apartment smells of bad air "freshener" and paint.
My stomach hates me for some sort of mistreatment that I haven't figured out yet.

I can't see things as they were.
None of my music sounds the way it should.

When I'm at work, everything is normal.

As soon as I'm home, the sickness overwhelms me and I'm in a different world.

I wish this would go away.
I hope it does soon. I don't think I can take much more of this confusion.

--edit--
After several readings over this I realized I write alot better than I do when my mind is all here.
It's interesting.
And on that note, I will leave you with a Danny Kaye quote that's been bugging me for several hours:
"...the pellet with the poison is in the vessel with the pestle, the chalice from the palace has the brew that is true.
-Right, well that's it, but plans have changed.
-Changed?
-Yes. The pellet with the poison was in the vessel with the pestle, but it's been moved.
-Moved.
-It's in a flagon.
-Flagon?
-With the image of a dragon.
-So the pellet with the poison is in the flagon with the dragon and the chalice from the palace has the brew that is true?
-No, the vessel with the pestle has the brew that is true.
-The pellet with the poison is in the flagon with the dragon, the vessel with the pestle has the brew that is true.
-Get it?
-Got it!
-Good."

You're not supposed to understand

]]> =mindbodygraphics Ahhhhh here it go! http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/21091849/ http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/21091849/ Tue, 21 Oct 2008 08:43:24 PDT

So I'm settled.........settled in the mildest definition of the word that is.
No more boyfriend.
No more company for that matter.

Being in an apartment is kind of a weird thing. It's nice to have a place completely to yourself (sans misc other tenants...), and yet at the same time because there's no one around it's frighteningly lonely.

It is kind of nice to be free, not having to be the way someone else wants you to be........but I'd give anything right now for someone to be here with me.

........but other than that I'm doing fine. lol

Went to another rave on Saturday. I suppose I'm moving up in the world of photography. I was granted unlimited access to all 3 stages even without a pass!
I'll be throwing a few photos up later, but right now I'm going to be late for work. If you're too impatient, then just click here: [link]

See ya

]]> =mindbodygraphics It's all over now baby blue... http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/20901857/ http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/20901857/ Thu, 09 Oct 2008 07:46:26 PDT

After almost 2 years, me and my boyfriend ended our relationship last night.

I don't want any sympathy, I just want to get it out of my system.

I'll be on here very little until I move to an apartment and set up internet.

]]> =mindbodygraphics Thanks a lot, Fran... http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/20812648/ http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/20812648/ Fri, 03 Oct 2008 17:13:20 PDT

Game rules:

* 1. Post these rules.
* 2. Each tagged person must post 8 things about themselves on their journal.
* 3. At the end, you have to choose and tag 8 people.
* 4. Go to their pages and send a message saying you tagged them.
* 5. No tag-backs.

Here it go:

1. I've got an awful cold right now and I'm going to shoot Love Fest tomorow. Outdoors. And it's supposed to rain that day. All day. And then I'm shooting Skill's After Party. That goes until 4am. And then work the next morning at 7:30am.

2. I used to enjoy filling these things out, but not anymore.

3. The cat just jumped on me.

4. I happen to be wearing all black. A rare occasion these days.

6. I shot #5.

7. My hair is blond again.

8. I can't breathe.

Ok people, listen up!
NO MORE.
I can't stand these f**cking things anymore! I don't mind reading them, but I just hate doing them.
Please don't take offense. I just really would rather not do them any more.
Thanks.

]]> =mindbodygraphics Hmm http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/20755528/ http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/20755528/ Tue, 30 Sep 2008 08:04:02 PDT

Got my hotshoe fixed.

For now.

]]> =mindbodygraphics So much for durability... http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/20615628/ http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/20615628/ Mon, 22 Sep 2008 08:00:55 PDT

My hotshoe broke off.
Literally popped right off on the way to a shoot.
I freaked out................and superglued it back on.
It worked!
For 10 minutes.
Now:
No response.

Not covered under warranty? Good lord I can only imagine how much this is going to waste me.

Chock this one up for just another reason not to waste your time on Olympus.

]]> =mindbodygraphics A big S for Shmutz http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/20550603/ http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/20550603/ Thu, 18 Sep 2008 09:48:58 PDT

IT'S SO F**KING COLD IN HERE!!!!!!

So, I'm still stressed out, but not as much.
I figured I'd join in the fun with

Rules of the game:

- Choose a singer/band/group
- Answer using ONLY titles of songs by that singer/band/group

Elton John

01. Are you male or female?
Captain Fantastic and the Brown Dirt Cowboy

02. Describe yourself.
Rock n' Roll Maddona

03. What do people feel when they're around you?
Sartorial Eloquence (Don't Ya Wanna Play This Game No More?)

04. How would you describe your previous relationship?
Don't Go Breaking My Heart

05. Describe your current relationship.
I Need You to Turn To

06. Where would you want to be now?
Goodbye Yellow Brick Road

07. How do you feel about love?
Someone Saved My Life Tonight

08. What's your life like?
Mona Lisas and Mad Hatters

09. What would you ask for if you had only one wish?
Don't Let the Sun Go Down on Me

10. Say something wise.
Sorry Seems to Be the Hardest Word

11.) What do you want to do/be in the future?
Rocket Man

12.) Describe your home life.
I'm Still Standing

13.) What would your last words be?
The King Must Die

14.) Describe your car.
Take Me To The Pilot

15.) Describe your style.
Wrap Her Up

]]> =mindbodygraphics GYYYYYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/20387569/ http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/20387569/ Mon, 08 Sep 2008 08:03:58 PDT

Oh dear christ I have so much work to do it's not even funny.
Infact, it's so not funny that it's making jokes about Princess Diana's death.

YOU'RE NOT FUNNY!

But the pictures are....

I've been volunteering a little photography for a very small local rescue group called Bitten By A Kitten recently, which explains all the kittens suddenly appearing in my gallery.
Plus I've got several other groups now who want me to volunteer so I have to sort them out because as we all know, there is no way any of us could do them all.
Saturday I photographed the Bay Area Pet Fair in San Rafael (or San Ramon, whichever is across the bridge) for my store, and I've got all that mess to sort through.
And then I have people wanting to hire me for private jobs (paid mind you).
And I've got a My Mutt shoot this week that wants to shoot during my work hours.
And on top of that, I've still got 40 hours of work I have to pull each week and I may be going back to school in the evening!

help.

This thing is taking off faster than I can get cards printed.

]]> =mindbodygraphics Where's the orange? And is it really clockwork? http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/20267753/ http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/20267753/ Mon, 01 Sep 2008 08:55:04 PDT

Ok, so I saw Clockwork Orange for the first time last night.

.........not ANYTHING like I had possibly imagined.

The only thing that really kind of surprised me was the mass amounts of tit in the film. O__o

But I'm still trying to figure out what the damn thing was about.

]]> =mindbodygraphics Perhaps my first feature? http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/20145176/ http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/20145176/ Mon, 25 Aug 2008 09:23:24 PDT

After browsing through Daily Deviations this morning, I came across a wonderful gallery that definitely deserves to be shared.

Now, usually I don't do this, and granted it's not the best in his gallery, but I found this deviation to be just amusing enough that I wanted to share it with everyone:

Go give him some love you guys.

]]> =mindbodygraphics RALPH!!! http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/20113641/ http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/20113641/ Sat, 23 Aug 2008 13:06:55 PDT

Nothing but puke city over here...

I think I might have a stomach virus.

But atleast I don't have to work. :\

Good news though! Garrett's cast is finally off!

And I'm off to bed again.
<3

]]> =mindbodygraphics Ooooh! Yummy yummy new toy!!! http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/19926290/ http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/19926290/ Wed, 13 Aug 2008 00:35:28 PDT

I got a package in the mail today!
[link]

A GORGEOUS NEW LENS!!!!!

With the help of

and Ritz Camera's f**ck up with my order, I decided to go with this Sigma 24mm f/1.8 MACRO.

It's absolutely massive compared to my original Olympus 14-48mm lens:

With such a large aperture, I'm hoping that this will really make a positive difference in my rave photos.
So far in testing it out, it seems to do an ok job, but is horrible with speed in focusing in low light, but I might be able to fix that with my Olympus flash on the way...

Here's some sample photos from today's testing:

Not bad. We'll see what will come of this in the future.

]]> =mindbodygraphics Oh Les Champs-Élysées http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/19749817/ http://mindbodygraphics.deviantart.com/journal/19749817/ Sun, 03 Aug 2008 09:54:33 PDT

I just saw The Darjeeling Limited the other night and absolutely fell in love with the song at the very end. ^___^
I much recommend checking it out.

In much more important news, Garrett broke his foot.

Cast and all.
So I'll be on here even less for the next 3 weeks.

But, I will be uploading a few more things.

Right now I'm on my way to SF to shoot a free rave in the city's center.

Somebody get me some coffee.

]]> =mindbodygraphics