http://search.deviantart.com/?q=by:mondu&section=today deviantART RSS for by:mondu en-us Copyright 2009, deviantART.com Tue, 15 Dec 2009 13:14:22 PST deviantART.com http://blogs.law.harvard.edu/tech/rss http://s.deviantart.com/minish/widgets/apple-touch-icon-precomposed.png http://mondu.deviantart.com/journal/27493325/ http://mondu.deviantart.com/journal/27493325/ Tue, 29 Sep 2009 19:16:24 PDT
- I'm regaining weight. And not just fat or water either. I'm actually regaining muscle mass. I've lost a total of 40+ pounds since June, and some weight gain in the form of lean tissue mass is good news.
- No more please-god-take-me-now bouts of headaches and dizziness
- My BP no longer averages 210/100. These days I average at 150 systolic and peak at 190. Still astronomically high, but not that immediately life-threatening.
- I can actually sit up long enough to do artwork again! Whoohoo! This also means I can cook for myself again (which is probably why I'm regaining weight)

]]> ~mondu http://mondu.deviantart.com/journal/26950763/ http://mondu.deviantart.com/journal/26950763/ Tue, 01 Sep 2009 04:59:47 PDT
One of the first themes I ran into was Aerith's theme from FF7.

Fuck all you FF7 haters. The opening bars made me cry.

]]> ~mondu http://mondu.deviantart.com/journal/26841930/ http://mondu.deviantart.com/journal/26841930/ Wed, 26 Aug 2009 17:33:10 PDT
The docs were worried I might have a stroke, or that the headache was caused by something else, but nothing showed up on exams.

The fistula I had isn't holding -- I'm now sporting a foot-long hematoma on my left arm thanks to trying to use it for dialysis. Considering the jugular catherer is already past 4 months, its going to have to replaced, maybe a new fistula.

It just gets fucking worse.

]]> ~mondu http://mondu.deviantart.com/journal/25847644/ http://mondu.deviantart.com/journal/25847644/ Thu, 09 Jul 2009 20:26:53 PDT
They (both catherer and fistula) hurt like bloody hell.

Anyway, I had it done at the National Kidney and Transplant Institute, at a bargain basement price. By bargain basement, I mean I can't pay it off even if I save for year (which I can't). I should be thankful, considering at the local hospital it cost 6 times as much.

My schedule was 9 am. I arrived 8:30 am. Then I waited for 4 hours, because the OR had so many patients. After 4 hours of waiting, I was stripped and dressed in a gown... then placed in a room so cold I thought it would snow. The 70 year old lady beside me said her teeth hurt from chattering from the cold, and I agree. There I waited for 3 hours when I finally was wheeled in. I couldn't complain -- I knew the procedure already cost (relatively) next to nothing.

At the NKTI, there were sorrier souls than I was. The lady I mentioned? She was sent home (after waiting 8 hours -- she arrived before I did). Apparently, her veins were too small, and the doctor said he _could_ operate... at 3x the price and with only 20% success. Man, I felt so sorry for her, since she could barely afford the procedure at normal prices. The guy after me? He sold his house. The guy after that? He was being paid for by a charity organization and was going to have to procedure done for free... _after_ everyone who was paying was done. It was already 4pm and the OR was about to close, so he was told to come back tomorrow and wait last in line again.

It puts things into perspective.




The doctor was trying to convince me to get a transplant (half price offer of 1.5 million!). My sister immediately said she would be my donor.

Over my very dead and decaying body she will. I love her and I know she loves me, but, really, that's just BS.

]]> ~mondu http://mondu.deviantart.com/journal/25732871/ http://mondu.deviantart.com/journal/25732871/ Sat, 04 Jul 2009 10:27:33 PDT
I've been feeling progressively ill for the past couple of years. I was getting more and more easily tired, and developed a cough and chills that won't quit. Last May, I also developed a fever.

When one day I could barely stand up, my sister brought me to the ER.

I had in addition to DM:

- anemia
- pneumonia
- pulmonary tuberculosis
- congestive heart failure
- hypertension
- gall stones
- chronic renal failure

I needed emergency dialysis. I couldn't even sit up, and could only answer in grunts. I was in stage 5 renal failure for weeks and didn't know it. My mom couldn't afford dialysis at that hospital, so she hemmed and hawed for a few days. 3 days in that hospital there already cost me and my mother everything,

By some miracle, my old classmates found out what had happened and they transferred me to a hospital where they worked, lessening some of the costs. I got the emergency catheter inserted into my jugular and emergency (2am) dialysis. I was barely conscious throughout all of this, and at one point they actually assigned a junior intern by my bedside because I could go into convulsions any second.

[anecdote]

The new hospital I was in was a far cry from the hospital I came from. Some of the doctors blatantly asked why I transferred (and I replied honestly: "I have no more money"). It was't exactly dingy (not like the hospitals I used to study/work in), but it wasn't exactly cutting edge either.

While I was being x-rayed, I said to my sister, "this place looks like a cat lives here". She laughed and agreed.

While I was being dialysed, a cat came wandering bye. Huh. A cat _does_ live there. Despite being only half conscious, we had to laugh.

[/end anecdote]

I spent the week the hospital, slowly improving. I was told that I would be on lifetime dialysis. 22 pills a day in addition to the IV meds. Yummy.

Once out of the hospital, we tried to find a dialysis center close to where I live. Thankfully, there's one within an hour's drive. The doctor there diagnosed me with depression. Thanks captain obvious. Nice place, though. I'd recommend it to anyone who needs dialysis.

4 days later, I developed cough like I was puking my guts out plus 41 degree fever. Back to the hospital I go.

This time, I had a _new_ case of pneumonia plus a staphyloccocus aureus infection. Yay. I spent the next 10 days in the hospital under more antibiotics.

Unfortunately... the dialysis unit of the hospital shortedout. This meant that I had to be moved via ambulance to a dialysis center in another city. Ambulance rides were fun -- all I did was throw up in them. One of the interns and my maid accompanied me.

In addition to the discomfort of an ambulance to and from the dialysis unit, I had an experience with that specific dialysis center that made me (and my sister and mom) never to go back to that center again:

I lost consciousness. No, I did not fall asleep. I freaking blacked out.

I was already feeling quite uncomfortable when I was seated. I felt hot and was sweating profusely. I tried telling the nurse and the intern that something was wrong, but apparently they were too busy flirting with one another and ignoring me. The intern, in particular, had a bad attitude that even my mother, sister, maid could feel. I felt it more -- I knew she was doing a half-assed job of monitoring my vitals.

Losing consciousness during dialysis was pretty funny, actually. A few seconds just before I blacked out, 4 thoughts raced into my head:

1) oh shit, I'm going to pass out, I know it
2) oh fuck, I know more about medicine than the intern and the two nurses that are watching me right now
3) oh hell, I know I know more than they do, and if our situations were reversed I'd likely be panicking -- the dialysis unit almost has no other medical equipment. Oops, there goes one nurse, she starting to panic, and the intern is looking glassy eyed
4) ah, screw this, I'm not fighting it...zzz....

Fortunately, there was at least one consultant that arrived later that knew what to do (this was related to me later). My maid, who isn't trained in anything, was also raising bloody hell (good bless her heart) and kept the dialysis staff actually doing something instead of freezing up. Heh. Apparently, my blood sugar dipped to below 50 (most people would already feel light headed at 80). Note: it was my maid, not the nursing staff nor the intern, who recognized the symptoms of hypoglycemia and took my blood sugar with our own blood sugar monitor. She was the one who told the consultant that my blood sugar was dangerously low. Some D50 in my blood and I regained consciousness 15 minutes later. When I came to she force fe... ]]> ~mondu http://mondu.deviantart.com/journal/24475141/ http://mondu.deviantart.com/journal/24475141/ Tue, 28 Apr 2009 05:40:28 PDT
When she got home, she handed me a white plastic bag with vaguely yellow tinge inside. It looked, felt, and weighed pretty much like a pack of syringes. I was, well, quite happy that she remembered.

So, I got my insulin out, sat down and opened the bag... and found a jamaican patty inside.

I found it hilarious. I don't know why, maybe it was because I was so happy I thought she finally remembered something that I asked for. Instead, she got me a jamaican patty for a midnight snack. Well, at least she was thinking about me when she bought it.

I love you, mom.

(I still have one more for today; either I'll go out and buy the syringes myself or nag her tomorrow.)

]]> ~mondu http://mondu.deviantart.com/journal/22367895/ http://mondu.deviantart.com/journal/22367895/ Mon, 12 Jan 2009 16:09:40 PST
I had to make do with tuberculin syringes. The capacity of a tuberculin syringe is the same as a insulin syringe... but the needles are like, 3 to 5 times larger.

Holy shit, I can feel the hackles on my neck rise when I even look at these things. And the pain...! Argh.

edit, jan 12:

9 more of these buggers to go! While I've already bought normal insulin syringes, I'm loathe to waste money and throw away the tuberculin syringes.

Yoko Ritona is hot.

]]> ~mondu http://mondu.deviantart.com/journal/20484542/ http://mondu.deviantart.com/journal/20484542/ Sun, 14 Sep 2008 07:35:38 PDT
A few sites have a "vote/rate up/down" as part of their fave system. Apparently, on one site there's a several people there that mass "votes/rate down" anyone who doesn't pander to their tastes (ie, not their friends).

]]> ~mondu http://mondu.deviantart.com/journal/18332307/ http://mondu.deviantart.com/journal/18332307/ Thu, 15 May 2008 07:13:00 PDT
1) 20 years of 2 insulin injections a day gets tedious.
2) Medicine is expensive. I can't go a couple of days without the myriad of pills without turning into a pile of goo.
3) I watch my diet. Constantly. I prepare my own food to control both calorie, carbohydrates, and fat intake. I haven't had sugar in, I dunno, over 2 years. The last regular softdrink I had was over 4 months ago. No cakes. No candy. No potato chips. No ice cream (well, not really; I eat ice cream about once a month). No chocolate (sugar free chocolate costs nearly 10x normal chocolate, wtf). No eating out. Not that I can eat out, considering all my cash goes to various medicines.
4) I stubbed my toe two months ago on the carpet. No biggie, right? just a bruise. Except diabetics take a hellishly long time to heal. It took three weeks and multiple doctor appointments before it stopped bleeding internally. Its been two months, and my toe is about half-way from healing. For a while I was worried that I'd lose my toe, or worse, my foot.
5) Ugh. One of my classmates (who's now the doctor of a big oil company) jokingly told me that in general after 20 or so years of having diabetes, his patient's kidneys start to fail. Thanks, man, you're a peach.

(sigh)

I've been diabetic for 20 years, and this is the first time I've really complained about it, so forgive me if I sound a bit emo.

]]> ~mondu http://mondu.deviantart.com/journal/17858623/ http://mondu.deviantart.com/journal/17858623/ Tue, 15 Apr 2008 02:11:40 PDT [link]

]]> ~mondu http://mondu.deviantart.com/journal/17138912/ http://mondu.deviantart.com/journal/17138912/ Sat, 01 Mar 2008 20:09:49 PST
Again, my apologies.

On a more lighthearted note, I bought Lucky Star and Eureka season 1. Good shows, those, but I liked Azumanga better than Lucky Star (even if Lucky Star's characters are cuter). Eureka is pretty good, and Officer Jo is pretty dang smoking hot.

]]> ~mondu http://mondu.deviantart.com/journal/16413982/ http://mondu.deviantart.com/journal/16413982/ Tue, 15 Jan 2008 07:36:59 PST
However, the moment after I say to myself "this picture is done" and I upload it, I feel this sudden... depression. It isn't the same anxiety knowing I'll get a dozen or so views at best, but an emptiness that's so strong its almost physical. I'm almost like a zombie for an hour or so.

Gah. It sounds like I'm describing heroin addiction.

]]> ~mondu http://mondu.deviantart.com/journal/16052953/ http://mondu.deviantart.com/journal/16052953/ Sun, 23 Dec 2007 03:53:36 PST
[link]

Well, its finally happened. Staring january, they will be holding contests where only "real artwork" is allowed (ie. no using the computer for any step of the process). To strictly enforce the rule, contest entries must include work-in-progress pictures.

"Photoshoppers have unfair advantage/its too easy". Fine. Whatever.

]]> ~mondu http://mondu.deviantart.com/journal/15525096/ http://mondu.deviantart.com/journal/15525096/ Thu, 15 Nov 2007 18:52:24 PST for doing my character, Mariel!


[link]

]]> ~mondu http://mondu.deviantart.com/journal/15262703/ http://mondu.deviantart.com/journal/15262703/ Sun, 28 Oct 2007 18:17:25 PDT
LOL!

]]> ~mondu http://mondu.deviantart.com/journal/15123369/ http://mondu.deviantart.com/journal/15123369/ Fri, 19 Oct 2007 00:53:27 PDT
I'm glad I didn't go out today (I was supposed to go there), considering that part of the ceiling collapsed where me and my friends hang out (the explosion happened less than 20 meters away). They're fine as well.

My condolonces to the families of the deceased.

]]> ~mondu http://mondu.deviantart.com/journal/15053874/ http://mondu.deviantart.com/journal/15053874/ Sun, 14 Oct 2007 06:16:31 PDT
But when I do a request and not receive a thanks or a fave from the person I made it for, it still irks me.

Thankfully, this hasn't happened on DA yet.

]]> ~mondu http://mondu.deviantart.com/journal/14327134/ http://mondu.deviantart.com/journal/14327134/ Fri, 24 Aug 2007 23:22:14 PDT
It recently refused to allow me access to my account unless I turned off my ad blocker.

This saddened me, as it means I no longer will be going to their site. No site is worth willingly exposing myself to ad programs on a regular basis. After talking to an admin, I was told that it was now the sites policy that anyone who had an ad blocker was a "leecher".

Ah, well. Money being the root of yada yada yada.

]]> ~mondu http://mondu.deviantart.com/journal/13736967/ http://mondu.deviantart.com/journal/13736967/ Sat, 14 Jul 2007 20:09:39 PDT
Hopefully, I'll buy a new one next week, and finally be able to upgrade to more than 128Mb RAM (and poser 6). Nearly everything I've made with poser had that 128Mb RAM limit in mind -- almost no textures, no backgrounds, as very little props as possible, no moprhs, etc. Heck, simply loading/saving Aiko3 Full Version takes 10 minutes, never mind posing and experimenting with shaders. I can also now run photoshop without tearing my hair out because it feels like molasses on my old PC.

Heh, maybe I can play Sims 2 now.

I'm kinda excited.

]]> ~mondu http://mondu.deviantart.com/journal/13616109/ http://mondu.deviantart.com/journal/13616109/ Thu, 05 Jul 2007 03:47:03 PDT
"Real artists don't use Photoshop."

"Did you draw it? Or did you click it?"

We have this monthly contest at MTGSalvation. Nothing serious, just for kicks and giggles. No prize, nothing to prove to anyone.

Unfortunately, there a small of group of people with the above mentality. Despite the mod stressing that the media used doesn't matter (crayon, pencil, photoshop, 3d, whatever), there are some people who keep on insisting that anything done/edited with a computer shouldn't be allowed because "its easy" and some other retarded reasoning. MTG art itself is heavily CG (a lot purely CG) and they've even come out with an article that CG is just as valid as traditional art, yet we've got this bunch of "critics" saying that the art contests we hold shouldn't feature anything done on a PC.

Hypocritically, one of these "experts" (he called himself "The Art Teacher" and claims to have sold more artwork than we'd ever see) spams out on Photoshop filters. When brought to his attention, he vehemntly denied it, claiming that he "painted" it. Once he even tried to submit a trace of a photo (and it was proven to be a photo with a several photoshop filters slapped on). He claimed it was his "sketch", even after being confronted with the photo. And yet to this day, the other "CG isn't art" groupies worship the ground he walks on. "The last person who tried to give constructive criticism was flamed". Whatever.

Pisses me off. ]]> ~mondu http://mondu.deviantart.com/journal/10138095/ http://mondu.deviantart.com/journal/10138095/ Wed, 20 Sep 2006 23:36:10 PDT
"We are removing your picture because it was made with Poser, and therefore, not fanart. Fanart is something that you must have yourself."

"I'm, glad you admitted that you use Poser. I mean, people might think you had talent."

Whatever. ]]> ~mondu http://mondu.deviantart.com/journal/9753068/ http://mondu.deviantart.com/journal/9753068/ Wed, 16 Aug 2006 20:24:10 PDT ~mondu