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]]> ~murderxmexbeautiful http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/19528819/ http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/19528819/ Tue, 22 Jul 2008 00:13:16 PDT
]]> ~murderxmexbeautiful http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/16738503/ http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/16738503/ Tue, 05 Feb 2008 12:45:05 PST
the conversation happened and what i feared would happen did happen.

and now all i want is to get hit by a car and die.

]]> ~murderxmexbeautiful http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/16498009/ http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/16498009/ Sun, 20 Jan 2008 22:34:44 PST i don't want to deal with tough stuff.

]]> ~murderxmexbeautiful http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/14692646/ http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/14692646/ Tue, 18 Sep 2007 19:08:09 PDT and a few others from the summer and such.

i don't take pictures that often anymore...and i miss it.
sometimes i miss it a whole lot.
why don't i take them anymore?

i got a desk job at Arrow Stage Lines (you know the bus company) working in Accounting.
random i know.
i'm not even good at math.

]]> ~murderxmexbeautiful http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/12904322/ http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/12904322/ Wed, 09 May 2007 19:44:51 PDT and i don't think i'm ready.
i want to be done but i don't want everything to change again.

]]> ~murderxmexbeautiful http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/11484815/ http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/11484815/ Thu, 18 Jan 2007 16:48:21 PST
]]> ~murderxmexbeautiful http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/11052330/ http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/11052330/ Wed, 13 Dec 2006 15:02:43 PST i really wish i could.
that would be a dream come true.
all i really want to do is take beautiful photos.
that's all i want out of life.
is that so much to ask?
because, evidently, it is.

my throat feels like i swallowed cotton and i don't know why.
studying for finals sucks.
i want Christmas break.
i'm seeing Bright Eyes on Friday.

]]> ~murderxmexbeautiful http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/10443433/ http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/10443433/ Thu, 19 Oct 2006 09:28:56 PDT not that many anymore.
mostly just snapshots.

i've gone to some shows, but haven't took any pictures.
i saw Bradley Hathaway and took some pictures.
my friends in Local Celebrity [link] played a battle of the bands in Lawrence KS at the Granada and i took some pictures of that.
not that many turned out to great.
because, honestly, i'm not that great of a photographer.
and i'm ok with that.

i took 2 midterms today and i think i did alright.
right now i'm focusing on my school work and being in love with Vic

]]> ~murderxmexbeautiful http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/9355576/ http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/9355576/ Wed, 12 Jul 2006 14:57:00 PDT photographer?
sure, i'm ok. every once in a while i get a good shot or 2. whatev. no big deal.
graphic designer
no. i don't know what i'm doing. i'm not really any good at it. i do ok with what i taught myself.
writer?
yeah like 2 years ago i was convinced i was going to be a writer. then i discovered that i have nothing to write about. i guess i write a few poems every once in a while. maybe they're ok? i don't know.
i'm not a real writer.
i'm not a real photographer.
i'm not a real graphic designer.
i'm not good enough to make it a career.
i don't know what i'm going to do with my life.
i don't know what i'm good at yet.
this was my realistic look at myl ife. ]]> ~murderxmexbeautiful http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/9238104/ http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/9238104/ Sat, 01 Jul 2006 01:48:32 PDT and i have a new ID.
the ID is huge so i dont if it'll stay.
but the other one was like a year and half old.
whatev.
not that it really matters.
i'm in arizona. trying to get used to the heat and scenary. not really happening.
i'm homesick for nebraska hardcore. and i never thought that could happen. boy was i wrong.
i've still got more pictures to submit later.
but i'm sick of doing it now.
more Speeding in Neutral shots to come.
some i actually really really like and am pretty proud of.
i hate thinking of titles for pictures. i really do. i'm bad at it.

hellogoodbye full length out August 8th. who is super pumped? this girl. ]]> ~murderxmexbeautiful http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/8873159/ http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/8873159/ Thu, 25 May 2006 11:36:38 PDT ~murderxmexbeautiful http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/8356980/ http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/8356980/ Mon, 03 Apr 2006 18:40:58 PDT i also wish i had a really nice digital camera.
and that i was really good with photoshop.
basically, i wish i had mad skillz and $$money$$.
word. ]]> ~murderxmexbeautiful http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/8085550/ http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/8085550/ Mon, 06 Mar 2006 15:44:50 PST
durning the last band's last song this article that was in the Lincoln paper about the accident was read.

---------------------------------------
Teens killed in accident were best friends
BY JONNIE TATE' FINN / Lincoln Journal Star

Two Tecumseh teens are dead after the pickup truck they were driving collided with a semi-trailer truck Tuesday night.


Garrett Rap (left) and Matt Kenyon were best friends. (Courtesy Photo)


Garrett Rap, 16, and Matt Kenyon, 15, both of Tecumseh, were driving north on a county road about two miles west of Tecumseh when the Red 1991 Chevy S10 pickup Rap was driving went through a stop sign, according to Deb Collins, a spokesperson for the Nebraska State Patrol.

Wendell Keller, 51, of Shelbourne, Ind., was driving west on Nebraska 136 when his trailer truck hit the passenger side of the pickup, Collins said. The crash occurred around 8:30 p.m.

Matt Kenyon died at the scene of the crash and Rap was pronounced dead at the Johnson County Hospital in Tecumseh. Keller was not injured.


Collins said it was unknown if seatbelts were used in the pickup, but said Keller was wearing a seatbelt.

The teens, both sophomores at Tecumseh High School, had been best friends “all their lives,” said Dave Kenyon, Matt’s father.

An operator at Tecumseh High School said counselors from local schools and clergy from around the area were at the school Wednesday helping students and staff cope with the losses.

The two teens were in an emo-punk band together. Matt Kenyon played the guitar and Rap played the drums. The two had been at band practice before the fatal accident, Dave Kenyon said.

Both teens were members on MySpace, a social networking Web site featuring members’ profiles, blogs and photos. The following was taken verbatim from Matt Kenyon’s site, “Just close your eyes, Everything will be okay.”

“My names Matthew but you can call me Matt I guess/ …/ Im a very open person so you can ask me anything and Ill answer honestly/ I hate people who put up an act to impress others/ Im a vegetarian, and no i dont have a reason to be one/ I actually care about what others have to say/ If you dont like me, fine dont talk to me, doesnt hurt me at all/ Dont try and say that your better than me, cuz even if you are, who cares/ Dont hate me because of the way I am/ I dont judge you so dont judge me”

Said Dave Kenyon: “He had such a passion for everything and he was so independent. He didn’t do anything without passion and that’s hard to find these days.”

Funeral information was not available Wednesday.

Reach Jonnie Taté Finn at 473-7395 or tfinn@journalstar.com.

Matt and Garrett Foundation

Memorials can be sent to the Matt and Garret Foundation at the American National Bank, 310 Broadway St., Tecumseh 68450. For more information, call (402) 335-3341.
------------------------------------------------------

hold on to your friends.
never take them for granted.
you never know when your or their last day is.
<3 ]]> ~murderxmexbeautiful http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/7980098/ http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/7980098/ Thu, 23 Feb 2006 11:23:42 PST I HAVE A PICTURE ON A JONES SODA BOTTLE.
[link]
yeah, go look at it.
its a picture of Megan
i have a bottle of Watermelon soda WITH that picture on it.
i've been so excited ALL day. its so awesome! ]]> ~murderxmexbeautiful http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/7821583/ http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/7821583/ Mon, 06 Feb 2006 17:56:15 PST ~murderxmexbeautiful http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/7468313/ http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/7468313/ Sat, 31 Dec 2005 15:08:38 PST a brand new year.
a year in which i will graduate high school and start college.
scary.

i went out with my boys in Speeding in Neutral [link] and we took some pictures.
some of them turned out really good.
others not as great.
but i was happy with quite a few.
i uploaded a lot of them.

tonight SIN is playing a New Years show with The Normandy Call.
i will be taking pictures for both bands so i'll probably have more pictures to upload from that.

all in all 2005 was a pretty good year.
some stuff happend that i would have liked not have happend but some really good stuff has happend too.
life it really good right now. ]]> ~murderxmexbeautiful http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/6773321/ http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/6773321/ Sat, 15 Oct 2005 09:07:35 PDT ~murderxmexbeautiful http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/6645891/ http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/6645891/ Fri, 30 Sep 2005 20:35:44 PDT ~murderxmexbeautiful http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/6343830/ http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/6343830/ Sat, 27 Aug 2005 15:59:11 PDT
i got soap in my eye during my shower today.
it hurt real bad.

i have a sunburn on the backs of my shoulders. ]]> ~murderxmexbeautiful http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/6297677/ http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/6297677/ Mon, 22 Aug 2005 13:29:42 PDT i was a little freaked out about that today.
not scared.
just freaked.
i dont feel old enough for this to be my last year of high school yet.

Now Playing:
Dashboard Confessional - The Sharp Hint of New Tears ]]> ~murderxmexbeautiful http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/6216152/ http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/6216152/ Sat, 13 Aug 2005 12:12:55 PDT and one of them won.
won like overall in the junior devision.
so i get a ribbon and i think that picture gets to go to the state fair!
i'm really excited.
i was so happy i won.
life's been really good lately.
yesterday especially

school starts the 22nd. ]]> ~murderxmexbeautiful http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/6089385/ http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/6089385/ Sun, 31 Jul 2005 13:44:59 PDT and pretty much now for good.
we're taking some sort of small family vacation thing on like wednesday or something.
i dont know.
but other than that i'm home and have no where left to go.
i took a whole bunch of pictures while i was out on the East Coast the past 2 weeks.
when i get around to uploading them i'll submit a few.
my mom wants to me to put pictures in the fair.
i think i may.
i just dont know what ones though...

my ears are at a 2 gauge now
i love them, but they're a bit sore at the moment.

bloc party is fun music. ]]> ~murderxmexbeautiful http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/5849006/ http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/5849006/ Tue, 05 Jul 2005 16:21:04 PDT Showbread

it is so that my transgressions have born a withered fruit,
the sun has scorched the rising plans;
alas they have no root, the bleached bones of animals bound by leather strips,
dance through the air with laughter as i wield this wicked whip,
as you did warn me carpenter, this world has weakened my heart,
so easily i disparage, self-seeking the work of my art,
and there you have come to me at the moment i bathe in my sorrow,
so in love with myself, sought after avoiding tomorrow,
where do you find the love to offer he who betrays you?
and offer to wash my feet as i offer to disobey you,
your beauty does bereave me, and how my words do fail,
so faithfully and dutifully i award you with betrayal,
the weak and the down trodden fall on broken legs,
as i walk past a smile i cast, fervor in my stead,
but my bones like plastic, do buckle backward now,
i lay in this field by Judas' bowels and anticipate the plow,
i can not be forgiven; my wages will be paid,
for those more lovely and admirable is least among the saved,
and where would i fit Jesus?
what place is left for me?
the price of atonement is more than i've found to offer up as my plea,
Jesus my heart is all i have to give to you, so weak and so unworthy,
this simply will not do, no alabaster jar, no diamond in the rough,
for your body that was broken, how can this be enough?
by me you were abandoned, by me you were betrayed,
yet in your arms and in your heart forever i have stayed

Your glory illuminates my life, and no darkness will descend,
for you have loved me forever, and your love will never end ]]> ~murderxmexbeautiful http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/5722087/ http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/5722087/ Wed, 22 Jun 2005 09:40:29 PDT Mood: so tired...
Listening to: the rocket summer

im back and all that jazz.
its weird to be home again...
i miss everyone so much...
i didnt want to come home...
i have some pictures that i'll get around to uploading some day...

]]> ~murderxmexbeautiful http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/5514119/ http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/5514119/ Tue, 31 May 2005 17:31:27 PDT i wont be back until June 19th.
see you then kids.
<3
have an awesome summer.
i cant wait for mine. ]]> ~murderxmexbeautiful http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/5486170/ http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/5486170/ Sat, 28 May 2005 14:33:21 PDT
the last thing i wanna do right now is read your stupid poetry. why cant you just tell me what you really wanna say? you'd clear your conscience with words so weak and empty. but something in your eyes gave you away and i've been lonely like a silhouette or a serenade. a heart attack or a man betrayed. the arms of love are holding me like a silhouette or a serenade. is this all you have to say? this broken boy would hang on every word. you tell me that you need me while i slowly fall apart. you'd heal your heart ache with words so cool and callous. but the absence of your tears gave you away. and i've been lonely like a silhouette or a serenade. a heart attack or a man betrayed. the arms of love are holding me like a silhouette or a serenade. and all pretty poems have to end. so i say this before i leave, if words are your weapons my dear i surrender, surrender. and i've been lonely like a silhouette or a serenade. a heart attack or a man betrayed the arms of love are holding me to you. ]]> ~murderxmexbeautiful http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/5437168/ http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/5437168/ Mon, 23 May 2005 09:35:16 PDT i need the smell of summer. i need its noises in my ear.

its the summer time.
which means mowing.
and mowing is the devil.

it also means late night phone calls.
and staying up until 5 in the morning.
and sleeping until 12.

it means leaving Nebraska and all your friends and having adventures with people you never get to see or that you've never met and having the time of your life with them and getting closer to them than people you see everyday at school.

the summer means getting closer to God for me.
in the summer i get me spiritual life somewhat straightened out.
and then by the end of the school year its mangled again.
its a never ending cycle.

i think this summer should be an amazing one.
and i'm really looking forward to it. ]]> ~murderxmexbeautiful http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/5391442/ http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/5391442/ Wed, 18 May 2005 11:23:54 PDT SCHOOLS OUT SCHOOLS OUT SCHOOLS OUT SCHOOLS OUT SCHOOLS OUT SCHOOLS OUT SCHOOLS OUT SCHOOLS OUT SCHOOLS OUT SCHOOLS OUT SCHOOLS OUT SCHOOLS OUT SCHOOLS OUT SCHOOLS OUT SCHOOLS OUT SCHOOLS OUT SCHOOLS OUT SCHOOLS OUT SCHOOLS OUT SCHOOLS OUT SCHOOLS OUT SCHOOLS OUT SCHOOLS OUT SCHOOLS OUT SCHOOLS OUT SCHOOLS OUT SCHOOLS OUT SCHOOLS OUT SCHOOLS OUT SCHOOLS OUT SCHOOLS OUT SCHOOLS OUT SCHOOLS OUT SCHOOLS OUT SCHOOLS OUT

HOORAY!!!

IF YOU'RE AWESOME AND YOU KNOW IT CLAP YOUR HANDS!!!

oh man, school is out and i'm excited.
i'm a senior now and it feels awesome.

i sumitted 2 things i made in art class but for some reason they arent showing up and its making me mad...

i have to go mow.
and i have to pee.
and i just burped.

i thought i was going to get to go see Showbread in Omaha on Friday...but nooo, i cant go because i have no way to get back home after the show. i'll already be there for State Track and everything...but no way to get home because my mom doesnt know Kenny...it sucks. i was really mad.

i cut my bangs...and i shouldnt have done it while i was mad...i cut them waaay to short.

we sent my camera to get fixed today! so i'll have it back soon!
but that's be yet another 100 some dollar thing i'll have to pay for because Friday night i got a $166.50 speeding ticket on my home from Beatrice...it sucked. ]]> ~murderxmexbeautiful http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/5330359/ http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/5330359/ Wed, 11 May 2005 15:25:48 PDT her.

i hope you know i mean i wish that you'd grow up.

she simply will not die.

no one should ever feel the way that i feel now.

this is me. i am this. love me.

i just can't wait for tomorrow. to feel alright about myself.

if i can make it through the next five minutes. i might be alright tonight. it's not alright. never again will i be content.

for all of this. i'm better off with out you.

you're always made up.

feel like i will never learn.

best friends mean i pull the trigger.

swallow. choke. and die.

you're everything i once had.

always showing that she's hurt.

if you're gonna rip my heart out could you use a knife thats dull and rust in color?

you remind me of a song i used to love.

the only thing that matters is that you get away.

it was everyone around you that made you act this way. ]]> ~murderxmexbeautiful http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/5312174/ http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/5312174/ Mon, 09 May 2005 14:52:12 PDT i love that girl.
i've known her since 7th grade.
AND our amazing friend Brett came too just when we were leaving to go to some parties.
i love him too.
he's like my favorite person in the entire world.
we're going to have so much fun this summer.
we had so much fun going to the parties of these people me and Brett didnt know.

i got new gauges yesterday too.
size 6.
they bled going in. ]]> ~murderxmexbeautiful http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/5276648/ http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/5276648/ Thu, 05 May 2005 16:10:58 PDT dance!!! answer!!! bend!!! swallow!!!

this is our dance...there are no survivors. ]]> ~murderxmexbeautiful http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/5228948/ http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/5228948/ Sat, 30 Apr 2005 10:24:09 PDT [link] 17th birthday

we're going to have so much fun tonight.

i love this girl so much.

more than you can imagine.

Happy Birthday Love!

<333
Michelle ]]> ~murderxmexbeautiful http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/5177594/ http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/5177594/ Sun, 24 Apr 2005 15:17:58 PDT ]]> ~murderxmexbeautiful http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/5113345/ http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/5113345/ Sun, 17 Apr 2005 20:16:35 PDT
Conor Oberst is my GOLDEN CALF!!!

because Stephen [my brother] said so
while i was talking to him on the phone.

AND
i'm eating white chocolate pudding.

EDIT:
oh yeah.
Prom/Post Prom was lastnight/this morning.
it was fun.
ONLY BECAUSE I HAD THE HAWTTEST DATE EVA
right Logan?
but yeah, i really wasnt looking forward to it at all. but it was acutally really really fun.
i'm in love with ball pits. ]]> ~murderxmexbeautiful http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/5064732/ http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/5064732/ Mon, 11 Apr 2005 20:49:56 PDT

and with about 100 pictures...
i'll only be posting a few on here though.
i love Missouri.


i had tons of fun.
some more fun than others... ]]> ~murderxmexbeautiful http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/5017668/ http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/5017668/ Wed, 06 Apr 2005 15:41:17 PDT i dont know.
i just feel like people are taking pieces of me at a time and using them as their own.
when they are entirely me.
and they hope people wont notice.
i bet most dont
but i do
and its one of the most annoying things i've ever come in contact with.
and thats saying a lot because i'm probably the most easily annoyed person you'll ever meet.
i just try not to be rude and show it.

i really hope i'm able to enjoy myself on the music trip and it doesnt suck.
i dont think it should, but you never know.
my parents are even going to let me take their digital camera with me thats tons nicer than mine.

if you have never heard The Moon Is Down or Clairty then you suck. and if you do not or cannot name who these cds are by [without looking it up] you do not deserve to call yourself emo and chances are i might not like you.

i'm not in a very good mood at the moment.
fin.
~murderxmexbeautiful http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/5007698/ http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/5007698/ Tue, 05 Apr 2005 14:02:15 PDT
its like a $200 camera.
i havent even had it 2 months.

i dropped it yesterday after school
i keep it in my fanny pack.
when i got out of my car i had the fanny and my messenger book bag. i readjusted and the fanny fell. right. on. the. camera.
i had to manually push the lens back in and when you turn it on the screen flashes on for a second and then nothing.
its broken.
and would take about $130 to fix and $200 to get a new one.
neither of which i have.

you'd think for the quality of the camera it'd be just A LITTLE MORE FREAKING DURABLE.

i'm pissed at myself for dropping it
and
Kodak for making a crappy camera
stupid Mr Rafert...i thought we had a history test today. thats why my bag was so heavy and why i had to readjust.
i'm mad pissed.

i just found an envelope in my room with an old cashed paycheck.
hey, its $26.14 i didnt have before... ]]> ~murderxmexbeautiful http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/4991465/ http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/4991465/ Sun, 03 Apr 2005 19:26:09 PDT
we had the most awesome time and we finally got to have a really nice long talk.

awesome.

i got to meet some crazy kids and me and Megan got to sit in the back trunk area of a Toyota and sing for them.

i also had to climb a tree to save Chad, our flamingo.

we took a bunch of pictures.
some of which i have already posted.

i hate this stupid "spring forward" time change.
it sucks.
hardcore suckage. ]]> ~murderxmexbeautiful http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/4974747/ http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/4974747/ Fri, 01 Apr 2005 22:24:03 PST

if you find the real world let me know. ]]> ~murderxmexbeautiful http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/4955785/ http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/4955785/ Wed, 30 Mar 2005 20:19:11 PST ~murderxmexbeautiful http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/4864301/ http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/4864301/ Sun, 20 Mar 2005 15:23:18 PST ~murderxmexbeautiful http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/4849948/ http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/4849948/ Fri, 18 Mar 2005 22:10:37 PST
good times were had by all.

except for Drew ]]> ~murderxmexbeautiful http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/4813976/ http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/4813976/ Mon, 14 Mar 2005 18:54:17 PST
i dont really like the ones i made of Spike.
those i did really quick too and they're pretty boring.

the second Superstitions of the Sky icon is my favorite and now one of my livejournal icons.

i LOVE Superstitions of the Sky.
Things Said in Passing is one of the prettiest songs i have EVER heard.
its beautiful.

i've been feeling sick.
its starting to go around and i dread it.

Now the times have changed and so have I, and so have you. But I’m not one to forget or regret. This smile can’t say enough. ]]> ~murderxmexbeautiful http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/4793947/ http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/4793947/ Sat, 12 Mar 2005 12:37:22 PST Dear Father, I need you,
Your strength my heart to mend.
I want to fly higher,
Every new day again.

i talked to my mom about gauging my ears lastnight and she's ok with it.
i told her like everything about it and how i'm going to do it responsibly and everything and it isnt going to damage my ears and everything.
she's ok with it and that makes me really happy.

lastnight Megan, Savannah came up and they brought their friends Caren, Tony and Brad.
i got to talk to Megan a bunch and that was really awesome because we havent been able to have a good talk in a looong time.

i'm going to make some cookies.
and i'm doing some house work stuff. bleh.
i have to work tonight. 6-10. ]]> ~murderxmexbeautiful http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/4759794/ http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/4759794/ Tue, 08 Mar 2005 11:46:11 PST i have to go back at 2:30 to do concession stand.

lastnight after my shower i cut off 2 teeth from my comb and then pushed them through the holes in my ears.
slowing making my way to gauging them.
i'm excited.
but they hurt.
i need to get some acutal gauging earrings.
::needs to go to lincoln or something::

today is Jane's birthday and i stole her cupcakes. i had them for a really long time, but gave them back because really i didnt want them afterall.

i REALLY like this band [link] ]]> ~murderxmexbeautiful http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/4734466/ http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/4734466/ Sat, 05 Mar 2005 11:52:09 PST we saw Backseet Bandits (local beatrice punk), Forever Farewell (local Beatrice metal/hardcore), The Normandy Call (local beatrice post-hardcore) and, The Weather Underground (Omaha hardcore).
it was a really good show.
it was in this giant salvation army garage.
there's just something about hardcore bands that i love to watch.
i love to watch hardcore shows.
the bands are just really fun to watch.
they get so into it and you have to be impressed that someone can scream for that long and that much without cracking their voice or anything.
i dont always like listening to cds of hardcore bands that much but watching them. oh yes, i love to.

Backseet Bandits pretty much just sucked. it was their first show though and they had a really hot guitar player.

Forever Farewell had a really good bass player and they pretty much just sucked too.

The Normandy Call is REALLY good. especially for local, small town Nebraska band. they were just really fun to watch too.
go listen to them
purevolume: [link]
hxcmp3: [link]

The Weather Underground were also really good.
the other guys didnt enjoy them as much as i did. their singer[screamer] was really hot and one of their guaitarists was right in front of me and he was pretty good looking too. he was really fun to watch because he was just like messing around and you could tell he was having fun. you could tell all of them were having fun and entertained by small-town nebraska kids.
go listen to them
purevolume site: [link]
myspace: [link]

this kid [link] was staring at me during the show. he came up talked to us too. it was pretty crazy. he was a nice kid though. ]]> ~murderxmexbeautiful http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/4712659/ http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/4712659/ Wed, 02 Mar 2005 15:54:50 PST gah.
in art i USED to be able to get on here and submit pictures i've taken or made and stuff in Art Class and submit them.
i tried today and NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO MR FRAISER HAS THE SITE BLOCKED NOW FROM SUBMITING!
i submitted something just YESTERDAY!
i was so mad
and i couldnt even email the project to myself from my gmail OR hotmail account so i'd have it at home using an attachment. it would let me add attachments.
i was so mad
MR FRAISER IS AN EVIL LITTLE MAN! ]]> ~murderxmexbeautiful http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/4696123/ http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/4696123/ Mon, 28 Feb 2005 18:56:51 PST i'm just glad everythings ok again.



i have this mad love for thin mint girl scout cookies.

i think this kid should go to prom with me - [link]

i love Burns Out Bright [link]

thanks to Megan i refound my love for The Rocket Summer

cross my heart, hope to die
i swear i won't say what happened that night
so starting today things are gonna be all right
your best you tried, and yeah you did fine
no better than fine, perfect in my mind
in fact, i wish your heart was mine
and i can hear the memory in my ears
back to the years and all those tears
but hear me when i say im glad we steered that way
because now we're here
--The Rocket Summer

i'm so bored. ]]> ~murderxmexbeautiful http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/4680603/ http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/4680603/ Sat, 26 Feb 2005 19:47:25 PST why do you do this to me Copeland?

i saw Megan and Savannah lastnight.
it was lovely
i got big hugs from them and winks. it was the best.
i love those girls.

today i got a prom dress.
i also FINALLY got
Bright Eyes - I'm Wide Awake. It's Morning
YES.
i'm so excited.
i got another Jack Skellington shirt too becuase it was $10. its pretty nifty.

i got Megan a surprise, i just dont know if i want to wait as long as her birthday yet.... ]]> ~murderxmexbeautiful http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/4665417/ http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/4665417/ Thu, 24 Feb 2005 19:25:22 PST we drove out in the country and took some and we took some in town.
we were going to take some at the park but it well just didnt work out.
i have this thing with it being dark and taking pictures of lights...yeah...
it was nice.
i was alone and it helped me to take my mind off...things....
there's nothing better than driving in the dark, by yourself, with the heater cranked and you windown down and the warm companionship of a Flamingo. ]]> ~murderxmexbeautiful http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/4656830/ http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/4656830/ Wed, 23 Feb 2005 19:03:32 PST ~murderxmexbeautiful http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/4625117/ http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/4625117/ Sat, 19 Feb 2005 21:09:44 PST i love it.

i bought the Garden State soundtrack
the Eisley cd
one of the new Bright Eyes cds -Digital Ash in a Digital Urn
then i ALSO bought 2 dvds.
Newsies and Dead Poet's Society.
both are 2 of my favorite movies.

i got a couple of shirts Thrifting too.

and now its like i'm back home and i'm automatically in a bad mood again.
i hate that.
i wish i wasnt here.
im getting senioritas early i guess.
i already cant wait for school to be over and i can leave and go far away to Missouri and not come back very often. ]]> ~murderxmexbeautiful http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/4590382/ http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/4590382/ Tue, 15 Feb 2005 15:05:57 PST no matter how much i dont like how they are.
and i need to change myself and not worry so much about other people.
accepting people is a big thing i need to work on right now.
<3
Michelle ]]> ~murderxmexbeautiful http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/4566015/ http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/4566015/ Sat, 12 Feb 2005 22:18:42 PST i love them.
Pin your wings down
if it's over now
Pin your wings down
just take a chance somehow
i acutally made an art project with those lyrics on them. i might post it sometime this week.

i am UBER tired.
District wrestling will do that to you.

i've learned a lot about people lately.
some things i didnt want to know.
some things i'm not sure about.
some things that i think i already knew
and my faults as well as other people's have slapped me in the face.

the end. ]]> ~murderxmexbeautiful http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/4541857/ http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/4541857/ Wed, 09 Feb 2005 20:55:09 PST ~murderxmexbeautiful http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/4533252/ http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/4533252/ Tue, 08 Feb 2005 20:19:08 PST it just sounds so old and weird to me... ]]> ~murderxmexbeautiful http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/4507745/ http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/4507745/ Sat, 05 Feb 2005 22:36:16 PST are suffering. ]]> ~murderxmexbeautiful http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/4490889/ http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/4490889/ Thu, 03 Feb 2005 18:02:49 PST sound like a good time?
well it does to me.

i dont even know what i feel anymore.

i'm just pissed.
and i want to scream.
and i want to run away to Kansas and live in a hole with Megan.
we could live off dirt like worms do. ]]> ~murderxmexbeautiful http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/4481251/ http://murderxmexbeautiful.deviantart.com/journal/4481251/ Wed, 02 Feb 2005 15:56:44 PST great.

in other news i wrote some stuff yesterday. and i just about cried and i wont be posting it.
good bye.

oh, and i'm sorry if i don't find everything you say funny.
whatever. ]]> ~murderxmexbeautiful