http://search.deviantart.com/?q=by:mytoy&section=today deviantART RSS for by:mytoy en-us Copyright 2009, deviantART.com Tue, 15 Dec 2009 21:38:28 PST deviantART.com http://blogs.law.harvard.edu/tech/rss http://s.deviantart.com/minish/widgets/apple-touch-icon-precomposed.png http://mytoy.deviantart.com/journal/28845598/ http://mytoy.deviantart.com/journal/28845598/ Wed, 09 Dec 2009 13:26:19 PST
The "person" I've been writing about is a boy. He's everything I could ever ask for and more. He's unbelievably cute, he's ridiculously buff, he's intelligent, and he's honestly the nicest guy I've ever known. Also, he's got the most amazing eyes. I've never been one for brown eyes, but his are so much more than just brown. They're so deep and dreamy. We used to lock eyes a lot, and neither of us would look away for what seemed like forever. It was always me that looked away first, because I would start to blush and I didn't want him to see. Ive liked him for a very long time, and I recently told him..well...sorta. After class one day, he fiddled around waiting for everyone to leave, and then approached me. He said something like, "So...I dunno if it's true, but (someone) keeps telling me to talk to you about it." He wouldn't specify exactly what it was, and he repeated that a few times with different words. He seemed really nervous (which isn't like him at all). I was freaking out in my head, and just staring at him blankly (I'm an idiot, I know). He paused, and realized I wasn't going to say anything. So then he said, "But I'm not gay." He said it unsure though, it didn't seem like he meant it. I don't know if he said it because he freaked out because I wasn't saying anything and changed his mind...or if he really meant it. I said, "Um..." Then I remembered the note I wrote him, pulled it out of my backpack, and handed it to him. He smiled, and said, "Thanks man." He sounded relieved when I handed him the note... I don't know what's going through his mind. He's so hard to read, and I'm to chicken to talk to him. It seems like he looks for me in the halls, and he'll watch me...as long I don't look back. If I look back, he pretends I'm not there and acts all awkward. Sometimes he'll smile at me...but if I smile at him, he looks away and pretends I'm not there. I usually pretend to ignore him in class...because I don't want to make him feel awkward or anything. Sometimes, he catches me and we'll lock eyes for a brief second...then both look away. When I ignore him...he ignores me too. I wish I knew how he really felt...I hate this. XD

I really wish I could talk to him...
The one thing I hate most about myself is how shy I am. XD

]]> ~mytoy http://mytoy.deviantart.com/journal/28537489/ http://mytoy.deviantart.com/journal/28537489/ Mon, 23 Nov 2009 20:19:03 PST
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So I told this person I've driven myself crazy over how I feel...

It didn't go bad...but it didn't go good either. Still on the fence, and it's killing me. We haven't talked in weeks... We both look, but avoid any eye contact and won't look if the other is looking already. I want to look...I feel like I'm sending the wrong message. I don't want to make it awkward though...

I keep trying and telling myself that I'm to call, but can't bring myself to do it. I hate how shy I am, more than anything. I keep wasting opportunities and avoiding this person getting me alone, even though that's what I want...more than anything. XD

]]> ~mytoy http://mytoy.deviantart.com/journal/27341666/ http://mytoy.deviantart.com/journal/27341666/ Mon, 21 Sep 2009 15:47:47 PDT
I really

really

really

really

really

really

(you get the idea)

like someone. But I'm afraid they don't feel the same. I hate it. I feel like I NEED them...every morning I make sure I'm at school on time just because first period is the ONLY time all day I'm guaranteed to see them. Which is totally ridiculous for me...I'm known for being late to first period ALL THE TIME. lol. Ugh...

Swimming conditioning started...my coach, who is an ex-navy seal, is being strangely nice this year. The workout is still ridiculously hard (he's an ex-navy seal...duh), but he's being waaaaaaayyyyy nicer than I've ever known him to be in the 5 years I've known him. I think it's because he doesn't want to lose anyone (big turnout). But yeah, mah abs hurt all weekend. All bettar nao though.

In Final Fantasy XI, I capped COR job merits (which is really big :3).
I beat Chains of Promathia (also huge)
I finally did Rize of Zilart (meh...total joke)
I got Nyzul Isle Floor 100 (big)
Currently working on finishing other merits and getting moar 1337 gear.

]]> ~mytoy http://mytoy.deviantart.com/journal/24829778/ http://mytoy.deviantart.com/journal/24829778/ Mon, 18 May 2009 20:00:48 PDT It's been a while.

My stupid mistake from the last entry doesn't seem so stupid anymore. I'm still not going into detail, but the person has kept their word and not told anyone at all. Before I did anything we were strangers, but now we're semi-close. Swimming has been over for a few months now.. and I feel it. Haha, I'm ready to swim again...seriously. Swimming is the only thing that keeps me in shape..haha. <.<

I've got a big decision to make before friday..and idk what to do...but I can't go into detail...
Geeze..my life is so interesting, right?

School is awesome...but schoolwork is teh ghey...but it's almost over. Idk whether to be excited or sad. :<

I found an AMAZING band! They're "A Skylit Drive"~ I just recently bought their album "Wires and the Concept of Breathing" and omg it's crazy. I'm in love...

In Final Fantasy XI, my life away from life, I hit COR75 a few months ago (max level) and I've been working getting on 1337 gearz and meriting it (making it better). Still having in-game money problems, as usual. I'm bad with money..I WANT TO SPEND IT NAO!!!!!!11 srsly...I will sit for hours LOOKING for something to buy when I have money.. <.<

Anyways...I be out...yo? lawl

]]> ~mytoy http://mytoy.deviantart.com/journal/23108923/ http://mytoy.deviantart.com/journal/23108923/ Mon, 09 Feb 2009 18:24:43 PST Not much has changed in my life...
but....

Swimming is almost over!!!!!
I hate swimming so much @.@
I just have two meets and sectionals to go!!!!!!
Swimming is sooooooooo boring. I dread going to swim practice everyday
because it is so draining both mentally and physically. The only people
you can talk to the entire two hours of practice are the voices that
may be inside your head depending on your sanity level. I usually
think of a song..or of about a person...but it's still soooo boring.
Nearly every day I come home exhausted and I'm sore the next day.
Swimming is such a hard sport and I hate it. Our guys swim team only
has 8 members...so we lose every meet just because we don't have
enough people. XD

I started leveling Corsair on FFXI...at level 51/75 XD...lol
I really really really like it, but it's such an expensive job to play.
My goal is to be 75 before the end of the summer.... (long time..but
exp gets so slow after 60 and I don't play often enough @.@)


Over the weekend I did something really really stupid...but I'm not going into detail here....

]]> ~mytoy http://mytoy.deviantart.com/journal/21349263/ http://mytoy.deviantart.com/journal/21349263/ Wed, 05 Nov 2008 21:14:03 PST
-I've been sorta falling for someone new...
-Me and my last girlfriend have just made up and are back to being friends (if the awkwardness doesn't kill us first)
-I'm able to laugh and enjoy school more
-I'm getting WAY better at drawing~!
-My digital art is getting better too~! >
-I've recently hit level 75 Thief on FFXI (that's the highest possible level) and I'm excited to start leveling Corsair and meriting/bettering my Thief~!
-I've won my dad's challenge of getting level 75 before he comes back from Iraq (1-2 weeks from now!)

Life is great

PS. I hate how the featured deviation get's blurred...

]]> ~mytoy http://mytoy.deviantart.com/journal/19939037/ http://mytoy.deviantart.com/journal/19939037/ Wed, 13 Aug 2008 17:22:32 PDT
]]> ~mytoy http://mytoy.deviantart.com/journal/19009251/ http://mytoy.deviantart.com/journal/19009251/ Mon, 23 Jun 2008 20:21:03 PDT It was so much fun, we rode every roller coaster in the park and a few water slides. Taylor always ended up going down the water slides backwards (I'm so sorry T.T). My brother was supposed to go down backwards and the raft just wouldn't listen lol XD

Saturday was horrible >.>

I had a swim meet saturday, so I get all my stuff ready and I go to bed at midnight on friday and can't sleep. My mom comes in at 4:30 and gets me out of bed. I get clean/dressed and get in the car and drive for 2 hours to get to the pool. The water was ICE COLD so I couldn't even swim more than a 50 w/o going numb (my events were 200 freestyle, 100 freestyle, 100 breaststroke (I didn't swim the breast lol), and 200 IM (Individual Medley . The pool was 50 yards long instead of 25 yards so my times were even worse because turns get you a lot of distance. By noon I was exhausted. I got in the car and we drove to Golden Coral (eww.) The food sucked, but I was hungry so I ate it anyways. When we got back in the car I took an hour long nap. The highlight of my day was when we hit dairy queen for some ice cream right before we got home. :3

To the point of this Journal!---------------

Leave a comment and I will:

A) Tell you why I friended you,
B) Associate you with something - fandom, a song, a colour, a photo, etc.,
C) Tell you something I like about you,
D) Tell you a memory I have of you,
E) Ask something I've always wanted to know about you,
F) Tell you my favorite user pic of yours,
G) In return, you must post this in your journal

PS. My mood is scared because it won't let me change it >.<

]]> ~mytoy http://mytoy.deviantart.com/journal/15694267/ http://mytoy.deviantart.com/journal/15694267/ Tue, 27 Nov 2007 14:05:46 PST
If you go over 45, you're a bad influence.
If you go under 10, chances are you live under a rock and have no life... even more harsh.
Total the number of things in each list you've done.

1. smoked. once, and my dad was there. It was just one puff, and it will be my last...

2. consumed alcohol. A sip here and there...

3. slept in the same bed with someone of the opposite sex. Yes, my cousin

4. slept in the same bed with someone of the same sex. Yes, my brother

5. kissed someone of the same sex. No....unless my dad/grandpa counts lolz

6. had someone in your room other than family.Yes

7. watched porn. Yes, I regret it...

8. bought porn. no...

9. done drugs. Nope

TOTAL: 7


1. taken painkillers. For pain @.@

2. taken someone else's prescription medicine. No

3. lied to your parents. Oh Yeah! (lul) On moderation

4. lied to a friend. A few times

5. snuck out of the house. No

6. done something illegal. With emily...you bad influence you...

7. cut yourself on purpose. No

8. hurt someone. I probably have. Only because I didn't like them or by accident.

9. wished someone to die. Yeah...

10. seen someone die. No

TOTAL: 6


1. missed curfew. Yeah, with emily...you bad influence you...

2. stayed out all night. No

3. eaten a carton of ice cream by yourself. Yes, it was Butterfinger Ice Cream!!!

4. been to a therapist. No, but my mom tried to get me to go...

5. been to rehab. No

6. dyed your hair. I want to, but my mom won't let me. XP

7. received a ticket. No

8. been in an accident. Yeah. It wasn't bad though.

9. been to a club. No

10. been to a bar. No

TOTAL: 3


1. been to a wild party. The Sexy Party!

2. seen Mardi Gras. No

3. drank more than four beers in a night. Beer tastes bad XP

4. had a spring break in Florida. Nope but I've been to Florida...

5. sniffed anything. No

6. wore black nail polish. No but I wore red for halloween

7. wore arm bands. Emily's..you bad influence you...

8. wore t-shirts with band names. I WANT SOME SOOOOOO BAD!

9. listened to rap. Unfortunately....

10. own a 50 Cent CD. Never

TOTAL: 2


1. dressed gothic. Yeah.

2. dressed prep. Yeah

3. dressed punk. Yeah

4. dressed grunge. I dunno

5. stole something. Yeah, a plastic teddy bear toy from school lol, I gave it back though.

6. been too drunk to remember anything. No

7. blacked out. No

8. fainted. No

9. had a crush on a neighbor. No

10. had someone sneak into your room. Yeah

TOTAL: 5


1. snuck into someone else's room. Yes

2. had a crush on your best (guy/girl)friend. Yes.

3. been to a concert. A church one that my mom had me go to @.@

4. dry-humped someone. Yes XDD

5. been called a slut. I'm a guy....

6. called someone a slut. Yeah

7. installed speakers in your car. Don't have one.

8. broken a mirror. Yeah, I sat on it lol

9. showered at someone of the opposites sex's house. Yeah

10. brushed your teeth with someone else's toothbrush. XP no.

TOTAL: 7


1. consider/considered Ludacris your favorite rapper. No.

2. seen an R-rated movie in theater. No...*cougoverprotectedmomcough*

3. cruised the mall. With my mom. *cougoverprotectedmomcough*

4. skipped school. no.

5. had surgery. No, unless stitches count????

6. had an injury. Lots. like the time I broke both arms at the same time and cut my leg wide open on a stop sign

7. gone to court. No

8. walked out of a restaraunt without paying/tipping. Yes, we waited 30 min at the register and they just kept looking at us so we left. we payed the next day tho.

9. caught something on fire. Yeah..

10. lied about your age. Sometimes...

TOTAL: 6


1. owned/rented an apartment. No

2. broke the law in the police's presence. No

3. cheated with someone. I would NEVER do that to someone.

4. got in trouble with the police. no

5. talked to a stranger. Yeah

6. hugged a stranger. No

7. kissed a stranger. No

8. rode in the car with a stranger. No

9. been... ]]> ~mytoy http://mytoy.deviantart.com/journal/15521908/ http://mytoy.deviantart.com/journal/15521908/ Thu, 15 Nov 2007 14:56:03 PST
BIRTHDAY: September 10, the day b4 9/11 hoo-ray for me

BIRTHPLACE: Plainfield, IN

CURRENT LOCATION: A house in moorestucky

EYE COLOR: Blue, but it's like a grey-ish blue with green-ish accents

HAIR COLOUR: Blonde

HEIGHT: Dunno, brb measuring myself....back: 5' 7"

LEFT OR RIGHT HANDED: Right, cuz I'm right like that

THE SHOES YOU WORE TODAY: Black Chucks!~

YOUR WEAKNESS:

YOUR PERFECT PIZZA: Everything or nothing at all

GOAL TO ACHIEVE THIS YEAR: Ummm... Make it?

OUR MOST OVERUSED PHRASE ON AN INSTANT MESSENGER: lol

YOUR BEDTIME: 9:00 but lights off at 10:00

YOUR MOST MISSED MEMORY: Umm... I dunno...

PEPSI OR COKE: Depends on my mood

McDonalds OR Burgerking: Both, I like variation

SINGLE OR GROUP DATES: Doesn't matter, as long as Taylor is there <3

LIPTON ICE TEA OR NESTEA: Twinnings, but Lipton if I have to

CHOCOLATE OR VANILLA: Vanilla Betchez!

CAPPUCCINO OR COFFEE: Cappuccino ftw!

DO YOU SMOKE: No, but I took ONE puff when I was little...GROSS

DO YOU SWEAR: When I'm mad

DO YOU SING: Only in private....

DO YOU SHOWER DAILY: Yes, every morning

HAVE YOU BEEN IN LOVE: Taylor <3

DO YOU WANT TO GO TO COLLEGE: Yes, Notre Dame or Purdue not sure

DO YOU WANT TO GET MARRIED: Yes

DO YOU BELIEVE IN YOURSELF: Not really...

DO YOU GET MOTION SICKNESS: Yes @.@

ARE YOU A HEALTH FREAK: No...

DO YOU LIKE THUNDERSTORMS: As long as the don't 'lectricute me

DO YOU PLAY AN INSTRUMENT: Violin, want to learn the Electric Guitar...

DRUNK ALCHOHOL: A few sips here and there....

SMOKED: I already answered this...

BEEN ON DRUGS: Nope.

GONE TO A MALL: Yes, but I was in a hurry to get out cuz my Mom always goes with me XD

EATEN A BOX OF OREOS: Not the whole thing....

EATEN SUSHI: No but I wanna to try it!

BEEN ON STAGE: Yes, Orchestra

BEEN DUMPED: Yesh ; ;

DO YOU WORK: No, but Dairy Queen would hire me

INTO A BOY/GIRL: Taylor.

FAVORITE HAIR COLOR: Blonde or Red or a mix of the two (strawberry blonde)!

SHORT OR LONG HAIR: Long

BEST CLOTHING STYLE: Girl pants, chucks, a tight shirt, and a studded belt

NUMBER OF CDS I OWN: Like.. 20? I don't buy CDs, MP3 Player (My Chocolate <hone>

NUMBER OF PIERCINGS: None.

NUMBER OF TATTOOS: I had a Scooby-Doo one but it washed off a few years ago T.T

THINGS IN MY PAST I REGRET: Lots of things

This better not be a rape survey...

]]> ~mytoy http://mytoy.deviantart.com/journal/15337667/ http://mytoy.deviantart.com/journal/15337667/ Fri, 02 Nov 2007 20:35:42 PDT ). I might be going to my friends bonfire tomorrow, so I am excited about that...but my parents are going so then again it might end up tragic. My mom likes to bitch and brag and is just REALLY annoying in so many ways. She sticks her nose in EVERYONES buisness. I hope Taylor will be there. But anyways, back to my day. Because I went to McDonald's, I didn't have to put up with the dumbasses that always torment me in 2nd period. They'll knock my stuff onto the floor and tilt my desk and call names and stuff. I've put up with stuff like that for the past 5 years though, so I'm used to it. I just ignore them and they eventually give up and find someone else. Monday I was SO close to loosing it on them. I never fight in school, but Monday they just would not stop. I elbowed one of them in the gut, but I didn't get him very good so it probably didn't hurt very bad. Lol, I'm known for hitting people REALLY hard when I'm mad and don't really mean to hit quite that hard. I don't like to punch, it just doesn't feel right and I can put a lot more force into it my pounding instead. I can slap too, I once was so mad that I slapped my brother on his back and it left a HUGE red handprint. After I did it he was lying on the floor screaming with his back in a funky position. I of course, was running into a different room lol.... The end of my day was pretty much boring, I didn't do ANYTHING lol

Wow, I didn't think it was even possible for me to type a wall of text like this one o.O

I didn't mean to do it, I swear! D:

]]> ~mytoy http://mytoy.deviantart.com/journal/15156982/ http://mytoy.deviantart.com/journal/15156982/ Sun, 21 Oct 2007 11:22:51 PDT dens and lit up the brass number four on the Dursleys' front door;

2.Stretch your left arm out as far as you can.
I touched the fireplace!

3.What was the last thing you watched on TV?
The Fresh Prince of Bel Air

4.Without looking, guess what time it is:
12:00?

5.Now look at the clock. What is the actual time?
1:32 @.@

6.With the exception of the computer, what can you hear?
Tak and the Power of Juju (my brothers watching it)

7. When did you last step outside? What were you doing?
Just like 30 min ago, and shooting a bow and arrow (I suck so bad I shot an arrow into the neighbors yard!)

8. Before you started this survey, what did you look at?
's journal (that's where I got tagged)

9.What are you wearing?
Plaid shorts and a hoodie from swimming

10. Did you dream last night?
I don't think so, I didn't sleep very well

11.When did you last laugh?
When I shot the arrow into the neighbors yard

12.What are the walls in the room you are in?
I think they're green with a slight hint of blue, but I'm color-blind (i have trouble telling the difference between certain colors sometimes). It's textured wall paper (eww...)

13.Seen anything weird lately?
My moms soap operas, :::drama::: whos baby is it any ways?!?!! :::drama off:::

14.What do you think of this quiz?
Umm... can I have the last 10 minutes of my life back?

15.What is the last film you saw?
The Game Plan, I went with three girls..yeah... (WHY MUST THERE BE SO MANY SEENS OF THE ROCK SHIRTLESS!?!?!?!!!)

16. If you became a multimillionaire overnight, what would you buy?
Umm.. a Wacom Tablet, preferably the "Bamboo Fun" (like a mouse but its a pen on a pad

17.Tell me something about you I don’t know.
Umm... I'm named after my grandpa (my middle name

18.If you could change one thing about the world, regardless of guilt or politics, what would it be?
I would get rid of taxes, the government can work for its money (whats the point? they hand you money then say, "I want some of that back" INDIAN GIVERZ!!!)

19.Do you like to dance ?
Sometimes ("Dance Dance, we're fallin' apart to half time" <3 Taylor)

20.George Bush:
's friend Dick Cheyene rips off chicken heads and sucks all the blood out through itss neck.

21. Imagine your first child is a girl, what would you call her?
I dunno... Nicole?

22.Imagine your first child is a boy, what would you call him?
Kyle

23. Would you ever consider living abroad?
Wtf is that?

24.What do you want God to say to you when you reach the pearly gates?
MY EYEZ!!!!!!!!!! (lol)

25.Tag six people who must also do this in their journal
I CAN'T THINK OF ANYONE ESLE THAT I KNOW THAT HASN'T BEEN TAGGED XDXDXDXD

Death quiz!
{1} Do you ever see garbage bags on the side of the highway and wonder if there are body parts inside?
No, the homeless people would have eaten them already

{2} If you ever got the chance to practice cannibalism, would you?
Eww.. no

{3} If forced to overdose on a drug, which one would you choose?
I dunno....

{WOULD YOU RATHER BE...}


{4} Shot or stabbed?
Shot

{5} Asphyxiated(gased) or exsanguinated(bleed to death)?
Whichever is quicker

{6} Drowned or buried alive?
Drowned, I love the water

{7} Killed by blunt-force trauma to the head or crushed to death?
Whichever kills me faster

{8} Poisoned or overdosed?
Poisoned by far overdosing is no fun

{9} Killed by a flesh-melting virus or by rats or ants slowly pecking at you?
Flesh eating viruz lol

{10} Out of all the above choices, which one do you like best?
Drowned

{11}...Which is the worst way to die in your opinion?
Slow and painful

{12} Killed (by a person) intentionally, or by accident?
~mytoy http://mytoy.deviantart.com/journal/15121138/ http://mytoy.deviantart.com/journal/15121138/ Thu, 18 Oct 2007 20:11:42 PDT
On a side note, I asked Taylor out last week I think... (might have been the week before that) and Tuesday me, Emily, and Taylor went for a walk. For some reason we were all holding hands (I don't remember why for some reason..) and apparently Emily let go so it was just me and Taylor. I wasn't mad, but it took me a while to figure out why they were giggling though. By the time we got to our destination (Emily's dad's house) it was time for Emily to go, so we walked back to my house. Once there Emily grabbed her bike from the porch and took off. I walked Taylor home, and then when home myself .

Yay for Randomness!:

You are my penny in the wishing-well,
I could never throw you out,
I love you Taylor,
You're all I think about.

Random poem I wrote Monday lol

I LUBE TAYLOR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


You are my penny in the wishing-well, < Your are my hope >
I could never throw you out, < I could never willingly lose you >
I love you Taylor,
You're all I think about.

EDIT:

Forgot to mention Emily's new BF, I hope it works out!!

]]> ~mytoy