deviantART: by:nikkynikki http://search.deviantart.com/?q=by:nikkynikki&section=today deviantART RSS for by:nikkynikki en-us Copyright 2009, deviantART.com Mon, 30 Nov 2009 12:07:02 PST deviantART.com http://blogs.law.harvard.edu/tech/rss http://s.deviantart.com/minish/widgets/apple-touch-icon-precomposed.png Feet Are Made To Torture You http://nikkynikki.deviantart.com/journal/28550064/ http://nikkynikki.deviantart.com/journal/28550064/ Tue, 24 Nov 2009 14:48:29 PST


Basketball season started. I made it on the JV team (yay!) and was very surprised to find out that the new JV coach is...(drumroll please)...MY CHEMISTRY TEACHER! :la: :la: :la: It's quite interesting, but it's also kind of fun. He's a pretty cool teacher. He kinda picks on me though. I'm not surprised. You always pick on the quiet and spacey ones. Always. It's a rule. Oh, and our first game is on Monday...the Monday we have off. How wonderful, right? But whatever. It's against marine City. We need to win. NO WAY ARE WE GETTING THE "NO WIN" STREAK OF JV LAST YEAR. Simms (coach/teacher) will make sure we win.

Anyway, my sub is over in a week. That's quite saddening for me. I like the little perks that comes with it, even though I don't even use about half of them. The one I really use is the...whatchamacallit...the search feature where you can look at more pieces per page. That thingy. Whatever you call it. I'm calling it the whatchamacallit. :D

My Thanksgiving break has finally started! Now I have school off until Tuesday. I'm not looking forward to Tuesday. I'm not looking forward to Thanksgiving either. My aunt isn't going to be there (but realize this, I'm going to say thank fucking GOD because all she does is complain). My cousin and oma will. But I can already predict what's going to happen. My cousin is going to steal my laptop and use it the whole time. Maybe he'll show me some stuff that I'm not going to be interested in. My oma will stay downstairs and most likely just wander around and admire the house. I really don't like Thanksgiving. To me it's a totally pointless holiday. I hate most of the foods that there is and I can't a lot of food. I could skip breakfast and lunch and I wouldn't be able to do it...maybe if I try that I can lose more weight...

Uhm, what else...OHOHOH! Okay, me Alex and Shelby are probably going to see New Moon on Friday. Shelby and I are going to make a video of it. It's going up on YouTube. It's going to be awesome. And I plan to yell out that Edward is a gay fairy the SECOND he sparkles. The second I see him, I'm going to gasp and scream GAYMO! The second I see Jacob...well, that's when I start drooling. Taylor Launter is fucking hot. Not doubt about it. His character is iffy, but he himself is like...HOLY SHIT HE'S RIIIIIIPED! I'm sad that Jacob later turns into a pedophile.

And I plan to take part in the Secret Santa this year. It'll give me something to do when I'm avoiding my homework. You can read more about it here kplzthxbai.

Other than that, I know of no news to tell you of...well, except that I've quit carving "hate" in my arm...it's now "stop." Stop what? Too much to name. I won't bother you with the details.

I NEED HAPPINESS IN MY LIFE PLZ, I DON'T LIKE BEING DEPRESSED. IT ALMOST KILLED ME THREE TIMES. :(

Journal Skin by =Thewinator and =keepwalking07
]]> *nikkynikki I Has A Goal. http://nikkynikki.deviantart.com/journal/28399202/ http://nikkynikki.deviantart.com/journal/28399202/ Mon, 16 Nov 2009 16:44:51 PST


Besides passing all my classes this year and hopefully getting somewhat of a life.

No, this new goal is something that I've never seen before. If anyone has, please inform me. It could help me reach my goal. I doubt it though. Anyway. The goal is this: I want to write out this whole novel-like story with little or no (if I can manage none) description. All dialogue. No descriptions of characters besides what the characters voice. Maybe some internal dialogue. And if I really feel the need to (since the idea I want to do it with is kind of fantasy-like and the magic-ish parts might require it) little descriptions of what the character is doing.

I like this idea. And it's my favorite kind to edit. I love editing dialogue, because I always read out loud when I do so. It's the best thing ever to literally hear what my characters are saying. :whisper: Sometimes when I edit I'll start reading everything but accidentally skip the non-dialogue and descriptions so I only have to read what they're saying out loud.

Journal Skin by =Thewinator and =keepwalking07
]]> *nikkynikki I Wonder http://nikkynikki.deviantart.com/journal/28375073/ http://nikkynikki.deviantart.com/journal/28375073/ Sun, 15 Nov 2009 12:56:11 PST


Do people who say that they get their best ideas at midnight mean it? Because I certainly do. I was up at about 12:30 last night and out of no where I start spitting out these amazing ideas for an introduction to my essay that I haven't even started yet I have to have a rough draft for by tomorrow. Really, they've been working on this paper since November 2nd, then I missed all that school from swine, and I haven't caught up to that since. I've been in such a creative slump lately.

I mean, I wrote it out and I have the first paragraph, but I can't really go anywhere from there until I catch myself up. I'm supposed to have quote from these two plays to help prove my point in the essay. One of them I still haven't finished yet, and I was supposed to write down about thirty quotes from the plays. Not I can do that really quick, but I'm just not. And I know that I need to do it.

...there's really no point to this besides the fact that I'm ranting about how lazy and uncaring about basically everything I've gotten lately. It's like there's absolutely no motivation going on. But it's not like I'm terribly depressed, like I have been before when I lose interest. I just sorta...did.

Hm, anything else? Well, I'm watching Looney Tunes right now! I'm so happy to be hearing Tweety, and Sylvester, and Bugsy, and Daffy, and Elmer, and all my other cartoons from the past on the TV! It's like a blast from the past and I feel like a little kid again. :love:

Oh, and I saw 2012. It was long, and not quite up my alley of favorite movies, but the special effects were so FUCKING AMAZING. And because I didn't actually recognize the actors (I don't think any of the main ones were really big names) it felt more real to me. I wasn't watching Johnny Depp or Tom Cruise trying to be the regular guy when obviously they aren't...speaking of Johnny Depp, I want to see that Alice in Wonderland movie so bad. It looks kinda twisted to me...I love it :iconiloveitmoreplz:

I really want to write something for this "To Write Love On Her Arms" thing, but the only thing that comes to my mind is a picture. All that's in that picture is two faceless people, a boy and a girl. The girl (like me because I'm an idiot and wasn't thinking ahead) has 'hate' scarred on her arm while the boy is writing love over the hate. That's as far as I can possibly get. :depressed:

...I feel lonely :(

Journal Skin by =Thewinator and =keepwalking07
 ]]> *nikkynikki I've...Got... http://nikkynikki.deviantart.com/journal/28156068/ http://nikkynikki.deviantart.com/journal/28156068/ Thu, 05 Nov 2009 11:11:24 PST


SWINE! :dummy: Officialisized by the doctor yesterday.

Speaking of yesterday, it was, by far, the word day of my life (excluding any depressing days that were the worst). I couldn't hold anything down, I lost two pounds that whole day, I could barely move, my mom touching my forehead made it feel like she was scratching me, coughing made my ribs feel like they were going to crack, I slept over half the day, and my whole body hurt like hell. The only good thing about it was that the only thing I could eat were popsicles, so my dad got me a box. Not that I actually ate many. I only had one. And it was huge.

Today I feel much better than yesterday though, so I'm hoping that was the worst of it and things will only get better from here. *knocks on wood*

And my teachers suck. The day that I can't even sit up without cringing they finally decide to give me my work! And I get to make up a two day lab in chemistry. :sarcasticclap:

Oh! And at the doctors yesterday, I'm practically in my pajamas (slippers included), freezing my ass off because I only had a thick sweater to wear (compared to my heated blanket on high), and I look like hell and the lady there says, "Have a GREAT day!" :| Seriously? What the hell is that!

I'm gonna get back to bed now, I'm getting cold.

Journal Skin by =Thewinator and =keepwalking07
]]> *nikkynikki DO EET! http://nikkynikki.deviantart.com/journal/28111223/ http://nikkynikki.deviantart.com/journal/28111223/ Mon, 02 Nov 2009 17:10:23 PST


Plz. :meow:

1. Who are you?

2. Are we friends?

3. When and how did we meet?

4. How have I affected you?

5. What do you think of me?

6. What's the fondest memory you have of me?

7. How long do you think we will be friends?

8. Do you love me?

9. Do you have a crush on me?

10. Would you kiss me?

11. Would you hug me?

12. Physically, what stands out?

13. Emotionally, what stands out?

14. Do you wish I was cooler?

15. On a scale of 1-10, how hot am I?

16. Give me a nickname and explain why you picked it.

17. Am I lovable?

18. How long have you known me?

19. Describe me in one word.

20. What was your first impression?

21. Do you still think that way about me now?

22. What do you think my weakness is?

23. Do you think I'll get married?

24. What makes me happy?

25. What makes me sad?

26. What reminds you of me?

27. If you could give me anything what would it be?

28. How well do you know me?

29. When's the last time you saw me?

30. Ever wanted to tell me something but couldn't?

31. Do you think I could kill someone?

32. Are you going to put this on your deviant journal and see what I say about you?

Journal Skin by =Thewinator and =keepwalking07
]]> *nikkynikki Damn It! http://nikkynikki.deviantart.com/journal/28105956/ http://nikkynikki.deviantart.com/journal/28105956/ Mon, 02 Nov 2009 12:46:30 PST


I GOT FUCKING SICK FROM TRICK-OR-TREATING! :sniff:

I've been coughing all day, and now my throat hurts like hell. It's evil.

Good news? I'VE GOT A B IN CHEMISTRY! I was so worried that I was going to fail that class. I've been doing horrible on the tests lately. It was just the first three quizzes that I actually did good on. The chapter tests we took brought me down terribly. I even had a dream about me passing all of my classes but failing chemistry. It scared me. :P

Journal Skin by =Thewinator and =keepwalking07
]]> *nikkynikki Well, Well, Well... http://nikkynikki.deviantart.com/journal/28087569/ http://nikkynikki.deviantart.com/journal/28087569/ Sun, 01 Nov 2009 13:05:54 PST


So yesterday was Halloween. Shelby and I spent the night at Skylar's house. We made another video with Skylar's half-brother...Joe, I believe his name was. He was pretty cool, though he wasn't the best cameraman because he kept laughing. I guess it was okay though, because we are pretty funny. =p And he did a good job in his role, so it made up for hearing him laughing in the background.

I got lots of candy trick-or-treating. And hell yes, I went trick-or-treating. Why the hell wouldn't I? You're getting free candy! :pumpkin:

Anyways, thanks to me getting second place in *OneWordPrompt's Halloween contest (check out the other winners and honorable mentions here) I got a one month sub from ~ElizabethParkin. So thanks a lot!

Journal Skin by =Thewinator and =keepwalking07
]]> *nikkynikki Boy Does This Bring Back Memories http://nikkynikki.deviantart.com/journal/28048176/ http://nikkynikki.deviantart.com/journal/28048176/ Fri, 30 Oct 2009 15:16:27 PDT :iconiloveitplz:

Halloween has the best foods (not including candy, because I don't eat a lot of candy). Oh man, I haven't had a plain doughnut in forever. I haven't sipped warm apple cider in forever either, just cold.

]]> *nikkynikki Holy Poop-on-a-stick http://nikkynikki.deviantart.com/journal/27981814/ http://nikkynikki.deviantart.com/journal/27981814/ Mon, 26 Oct 2009 16:50:00 PDT )

I just saw the oldest upload on here. It's seriously crazy 'cause it's like, over nine years old. :O_o:

Anyway, I'm tired. Like, really tired. I want to pass out right now, but I can't because I have chemistry homework.

But what I was going to say...I forgot...oh wait! I was going to say that I just realized that I'm a bit past 10,000 pageviews, so I guess a thanks are in order for that...so thanks! Sorry, I'm not going to upload something amazing like other people do. I'm a frickin' writer, what would I do? Something that would more likely belong in a journal? :| Exactly.

Welp, HALLOWEEN IS AROUND THE FRICKIN' CORNER AND I'M GOING TRICK-OR-TREATING WITH SKYLAR AND I'M GONNA BE A SUPER-AWESOMELY-GAY SPARKLY VAMPIRE! :dummy: Then my friends and I are going to make a Twilight spoof. I'm being Edward! :iconimsohappyplz: I mean really, I'm Edward. Effing. CULLEN!! I'm going to have so much fun making fun of his sparkly ass...and I get to be gay with Jacob (one of my friends) and have a Lock Ness Monster baby with him. :D

]]> *nikkynikki Mentally Imaginitive INC. http://nikkynikki.deviantart.com/journal/27838258/ http://nikkynikki.deviantart.com/journal/27838258/ Sun, 18 Oct 2009 15:09:30 PDT
Last night was Shelby's 16th birthday party! Yay! :dance: So she had her party, and it was Halloween themed, of course. And Shelby, Chloe, Skylar, and I got bored. So we decided to finally start our YouTube channel, Mentally Imaginitive INC. We've got two videos up as of now. You should totally check them out. :paranoid: We have a lot more than that prepared, but didn't have the time to upload them. But whatever, we'll get to it eventually.

I'm the one in the red pants with the red hair. :D I sprayed my hair to go with my costume. But that's not my costume, I took it off for our dancing video that Chloe, Shelby and I did. I so have to get to Shelby's to upload more of the videos.

Anyway, besides that...there's nothing to really report...

]]> *nikkynikki Octobre est mois de promotion d'indivi http://nikkynikki.deviantart.com/journal/27684509/ http://nikkynikki.deviantart.com/journal/27684509/ Sat, 10 Oct 2009 09:58:28 PDT

That's right, October is Self-Promotion Month! Now, everyone thinks that self-promotion might be a selfish or conceited act, but not necessarily so! Following the lead of `ATrue (her article can be found here) and a few others, I shall put together a horrible attempt at self-promotion. =p

About Me

I'm a girl who has only two heritages, German and Maltese, and is proud of both to a (possibly) unhealthy extent. My oma (grandma) is my only grandparent who’s alive, which saddens me because she and my opa were both children during the Nazi takeover. I’ve learned tiny stories from both from my mother (when she noticed I took an interest in WWII). My oma was apparently almost killed by an American pilot because her family was housing a Nazi soldier and were having a picnic in their backyard. Also, her dad was forced into the Nazi army, but jumped off the train that was taking him there. My opa was apparently in one of the camps (he’s not Jewish though) in Czekoslovakia.

I’ve been to Malta, and I’m dying to go to Germany and (now) Czekoslovakia because of my ties to the countries. I’m also begging to somehow learn German without using the Distance Learning program at school. I’ve also started listening to some German bands. Like I said, the pride I have could possibly be considered unhealthy. I also think that one of the reasons I like Tokio Hotel so much is because they’re German.

I'm a writer at heart. I was the kind of little girl who would both draw and write with the sidewalk chalk. I also had my own typewriter before I could even spell, and would write pages upon pages of nonsense just because I had stories going on in my head. While I'm still pretty young and have a long way to go in terms of achieving any literary greatness, I’ve been told by family and some friends that I have talent, but I think that it only shines through certain works of mine. I have many things that I haven’t uploaded or updated on dA, but they’re sitting in a file on my computer.

Off of dA, I'm just a regular teenager attending a small school, where I’m known as the quiet and shy girl who doesn’t open up around anyone but her friends. I take my studies semi-seriously and I like subjects such as French, History, and English. I also play basketball for the school when I make the team. I couldn’t live without music at my side. At many times I feel like it’s the only thing that I can rely on because it doesn’t judge me, yet it knows exactly what I’m going through. Right now is a hard time for me at school because I’ve lost my best friend because of a stupid reason. Just the thought of it makes me want to cry, and what makes it worse is that it’s affecting my mental health to a serious extent.

On dA, I'm a writer of prose (and bad poetry on rare occasions) as well as a wannabe photographer. I’m fascinated by the beauties of nature and the world around me. I don’t have much photography because I don’t really get out much, which is why my writing supersedes it by a long shot. I'm working on the 100 Themes Challenge, and I'm also part of a few writing clubs. My writing consists mostly of fantasy and horror pieces, which I find the easiest for me to write. A handful of my work is also based off my feelings and experiences, but tends to be when I’m depressed. It’s kind of how I cope without going to a therapist or talking about it, though I think that doing one or the other of those two options would help me even more.

Some of my work that's worth checking out

:bulletblack: Forgive Me In The Future (Literature > Prose > Fiction > Romantic > General Romantic Fiction).

Written because of *simplyprose's October prompts, it's about learning of what the future holds by searching through the hallways of your memories.

:bulletred: Show-and-Tell (Literature > Prose > Fiction > Horror)

Inspired by a picture of another deviant, this story is a horror tale about a kindergarten class's adventure during a pet show-and-tell.

http://nikkynikki.deviantart.com/journal/27649966/ Thu, 08 Oct 2009 12:41:30 PDT wanted and ordered that one CD along with the German standard.

Boy was I all worked up and excited for nothing. I practically tackled my dad when he handed me the CD. Then I get on iTunes to download it on my library and was met with DISAPPOINTMENT. :iconimnothappyplz: Very sad. But my dad's on the phone with some lady right now who said that they messed up somewhere, because she got other calls for the same problem (*coughangryfanswhodidntgetwhattheywanteda ndarecryingrightnowcough*).

I hope I can get my real CD...and soon. I've been waiting for this since like, August, waited even more excitedly for the CD when the tracklist and sample songs came out, then waited patiently for two days when the release date came around. I've no more patience to offer. :|

In other good news, I actually had the smarts to pre-order the CD on iTunes, so it's not like I'm waiting extra to hear the songs. Just the German ones. Even for those I could go and download them...somewhere on the internet. That's not necessarily what I'm mad about. I'm mad about what I could possibly be going through if I hadn't thought to pre-order on iTunes. I'd be in a horrible, terrible mood.

AND IN OTHER NEWS NOT RELATED TO MY MUSICNESS. Well, I don't think I have any. Oh, except for the fact that I've been carving 'hate' into my arm with a pin. Thankfully I can hide it with my awesome skull sweatband from Hot Topic and pretty blue bracelet that I got in Mexico.

]]> *nikkynikki HALLOWEEN http://nikkynikki.deviantart.com/journal/27543971/ http://nikkynikki.deviantart.com/journal/27543971/ Fri, 02 Oct 2009 17:30:52 PDT

Oh my God, I'm so excited for Halloween! It's like, my favorite holiday when the decorations come out. I wish there was an all-year Halloween store like that Bronner's place (all-year Christmas). I'd have died and gone to heaven. It'd be my favorite store. I love the decorations that there are, and I absolutely adore the jewelry that comes out for the costumes. I'd wear them all the time if I had enough money to buy them all.

I CAN'T WAIT FOR HALLOWEEN! OCTOBER IS THE BEST MOTH EVAR! :iconimhappiestplz:

]]> *nikkynikki Being sick is just the best thing in the world... http://nikkynikki.deviantart.com/journal/27429198/ http://nikkynikki.deviantart.com/journal/27429198/ Sat, 26 Sep 2009 13:12:51 PDT
I feel like I'm going to die.

]]> *nikkynikki Is It Possible..? http://nikkynikki.deviantart.com/journal/27155356/ http://nikkynikki.deviantart.com/journal/27155356/ Fri, 11 Sep 2009 17:29:52 PDT
Damn it all, I need help...

:blackrose: Nik

]]> *nikkynikki Bored to Death, Still Not Beating Procrastination http://nikkynikki.deviantart.com/journal/27131669/ http://nikkynikki.deviantart.com/journal/27131669/ Thu, 10 Sep 2009 12:25:58 PDT
Anyway, I don't know where this came from, I found it a while ago.

1.) What curse word do you use the most?
God damn it (or just damn it).

2.) Do you own an iPod?
TOUCH! :D

3.) Who on your Myspace do you talk to the most?
I don’t have MySpace...

4.) What time is your alarm clock set for?
5:45 am

5.) What color is your room?
Two different colors of gray.

6.) Flip flops or sneakers?
Hmm, sneakers in the winter, flip flops usually in the summer...sometimes.

7.) Would you rather take the picture or be in the picture?
Take it, usually. I hate having my picture taken.

8.) What was the last movie you watched?
The Ring.

9.) Do any of your friends have children?
Well if they do the fact that they were pregnant somehow got past me.

10.) Has anyone ever called you lazy?
All the time xD

11.) Do you ever take medication to help you fall asleep faster?
Never! I usually just listen to music.

12.) What CD is currently in your CD player?
Do I even have a CD player anymore..? Oh yeah, the one in my shower. That’s Tokio Hotel’s Scream CD.

13.) Do you prefer regular or chocolate milk?
Chocolate, but I don’t really drink it.

14.) Has anyone told you a secret this week?
I think so...

15.) Have you ever given someone a hickey?
Nope.

16.) Who was the last person to call you?
Psh, I don’t know. It’s been a while since I talked on the phone. I think it was my cousin, Tim.

17.) Do you think people talk about you behind your back?
I’m sure they do. And I’m even surer that it’s nothing good. But hell, good for them. They can’t say the shit to my face. They win at life. :sarcasticclap:

18.) Did you watch cartoons as a child?
No shit Sherlock.

19.) How many siblings do you have?
None.

20.) Are you shy around the opposite sex?
I’m shy around anyone I don’t know.

21.) What movie do you know every line to?
None. I do happen to have a life away from the television, thanks.

22.) Do you own any band t-shirts?
A few, and I’m hoping to add to the collection.

23.) What is your favorite salad dressing?
Uhm, ranch I guess.

24.) Do you read for fun?
Sometimes.

25.) Do you cry alot?
Depends what you call crying. I want to cry a lot, but I almost never do.

26.)
:|

27.) Do you have a desktop computer or a laptop?
Laptop.

28.) Are you currently wanting any piercings or tattoo?
Both. I’d love to get a lip/eyebrow piercing, but I don’t know about the tattoo.

29.) What is the weather like?
It just fucking sucks, let’s leave it at that.

30.) Would you ever date someone covered in tattoos?
Probably not. I don’t mind tattoos, but if they’re covered it’s kind of weird.

31.) Is sex before marriage wrong?
I don’t think so.

32.) When was the last time you slept on the floor?
Chloe’s birthday party in July.

33.) How many hours of sleep do you need to function?
I don’t know.

34.) Are you in love or lust?
Not in lust. Not in love...at least I’m trying to convince myself that I’m not.

35.) Are your days full and fast-paced?
Yeah fucking right.

36.) Do you pay attention to calories on the back of packages?
Yeah, after I’ve already eaten. Just out of curiosity.

37.) How old will you be turning on your next birthday?
16

38.) Are you picky about spelling and grammar?
I can be about mine, and sometimes others’ too. I usually don’t try to bitch about it though.

39.) Have you ever been to Six Flags?
Nope.

40.) Do you get along better with the same or opposite sex?
Depends who it is.

41.) Do you like Cottage Cheese?
Ew, no.

42.) Do you sleep on your side, tummy, or back?
Side, though I try all three positions before I finally fall asleep.

43.) Have you ever bid for something on eBay?
Nein.

44.) Do you enjoy giving hugs?
Not really. I’m not big on human contact. Friends sure, but only sometimes and not like, everyday. M... ]]> *nikkynikki Fuuuuuuuuck! http://nikkynikki.deviantart.com/journal/27072802/ http://nikkynikki.deviantart.com/journal/27072802/ Mon, 07 Sep 2009 11:21:28 PDT

And I don't have Skylar in any of my classes or in my lunch! I'm so sad. :tears: And I only have Shelby in my lunch. That's sad too. I need her in my chemistry class! We said we were going to blow stuffs up together!! But no, she took gay-ass physics.

BUT I DON'T WANT TO GO TO SCHOOL!!!!!! IT'S EVIL, IT'S MEAN, AND MY LOCKER IS ON THE VERY OTHER END OF THE FUCKING SCHOOL! It's the second-to-last one, and it already hates me. The combination is the gayest thing ever, I'm never going to get it right. Maybe I'll move into Shelby's locker...yeah, she's way closer to humanity than I am. I'm by the door next to the staff parking lot. No one ever goes that way. Ever.

If I die tomorrow morning (which I will, I'm going to become a zombie), remember me as I was! :iconimdeadplz:

:blackrose: Nik

]]> *nikkynikki I Stole :O http://nikkynikki.deviantart.com/journal/26976688/ http://nikkynikki.deviantart.com/journal/26976688/ Wed, 02 Sep 2009 12:32:04 PDT beautiful-blue. I'm a terrible thief, but I'm so bored!

10 Facts About You:

1. I like feminine guys better than masculine.
2. I get clausterphobic when I’m in a big crowd of people without a distraction (like walking through a crowd at an event while waiting for the event to start).
3. Monkeys are the cutest animals in the world.
4. I think Bill Kaulitz is the hottest guy I’ve ever seen! :love:
5. Music is my life.
6. I feel bipolar a lot. I’ll be the most depressed ever then feel amazing after that depression bout. Same thing with insecurities.
7. I’m really shy (no matter if it’s in person or not) at first, but as I get to know someone I’ll really open up.
8. I want to have something wrong with me (ex. depression, major phobia, etc).
9. I’m terrified of open heights (tall swings, stairs without railings, etc) but closed ones are fine (airplanes, roller coasters, etc).
10. I hate being social, and I can actually get sick with nerves if I have to go somewhere where I know there’s going to be a lot of people.

9 Things You Miss About Your Past:

1. Being the smartest in my class.
2. Being active.
3. The old Warner Bros. cartoons.
4. Not worrying about what others think about me.
5. Making friends by just saying a simple hello.
6. Constantly having my best friend over the house.
7. Not feeling like I need to keep certain things a secret.
8. Not having to pretend to be someone else to feel accepted by old friends.
9. The openness I had with my friends.

8 Places You Want To See:

1. Germany.
2. Paris, France.
3. Tokyo, Japan
4. My Grandma and Grandpa Gafa’s graves.
5. Where my oma grew up.
6. The view of a filled-to-the-brim concert hall of my favorite band from the stage.
7. The house Bill and Tom Kaulitz grew up in.
8. Rome, Italy.

7 Favorite Movies:

1. The Unborn.
2. Made of Honor.
3. The Harry Potter Series.
4. Charlie and the Chocolate Factory (Johnny Depp version).
5. Pirates of the Caribbean series.
6. The Proposal.
7. The Uninvited.

6 Things You Want To Do Before You Die:

1. Make a big difference in someone’s life.
2. Meet and talk with the band Tokio Hotel.
3. Answer all of my unasked questions.
4. Learn to speak German.
5. Open up to the people I know I can trust (but I feel like I can’t).
6. Hug a stranger.

5 Things You Will Never Do:

1. Be a whore.
2. Drink and drive.
3. Be close-minded.
4. Let them control me or my happiness.
5. Change who I am in order to be loved.

4 Things You Are Wearing:

1. My new necklace.
2. The new ear charm on my left ear.
3. This really cool ring on my thumb.
4. A sweater.

3 Of Your Favorite Memories:

1. Those times we spent together.
2. The pictures we took on the Cedar Point rides.
3. The nights that were wasted from us talking.

2 Favorite Quotes:

1. "If you laugh, you don’t laugh / If you cry, you don’t cry / If you feel, you don’t feel anything / Because you are without love." –Automatisch, Tokio Hotel (English translation)
2. "Reality is for those who lack imagination."

1 Thing You Wish You Could Do Over:

1. There’s too many things I would want to redo.

This was a fun and interesting way to waste time. :heart:

Also, I preordered Tokio Hotel's new CD that's coming out, Humanoid, on Amazon. I can't wait for it to come! I'm so excited because the few songs that I have aren't the best quality. Plus I REALLY want that CD!! :D

:blackrose: Nik

]]> *nikkynikki WRESTLING IS STILL THE GAYEST SPORT TO ME...EVER http://nikkynikki.deviantart.com/journal/26959802/ http://nikkynikki.deviantart.com/journal/26959802/ Tue, 01 Sep 2009 15:01:21 PDT
I only knew the wrestlers that they've mentioned to me, and I had no idea who the hell I should cheer for, but I had a surprisingly good time with them.

Not to mention that some of those guys are seriously fucking HOTT! :iconlarryplz:

I've only watched wrestling like, four times in my whole life and each time I was pretty bored. Actually being there with ring-side seats (second row baby!) was wayyy more fun than watching it on TV. And those guys have some seriously beefy hands! John Cena's fingers were fucking huge! They reminded me of like, sausages or something, I swear to god.

Anyway, I'd actually want to go to a match again. But only if it was with my aunt and/or cousin. Otherwise I'd be totally lost. :XD: And I had fun climbing over the chairs to try to shake hands with the wrestler's whose name's I could barely remember.

AND TODAY IS TOM AND BILL'S BIRTHDAY! :party: I wanna call this number to leave them a birthday message, just because I can! :la: And I've fallen in complete love with their song Automatic. It's amazing.

:blackrose: Nik

]]> *nikkynikki I'M BAAAAAACK!! http://nikkynikki.deviantart.com/journal/26895124/ http://nikkynikki.deviantart.com/journal/26895124/ Sat, 29 Aug 2009 12:18:23 PDT

Anyway, our flight home was stupid. I was in the weirdest positions while I was sleeping, and a lot of them hurt. Then we had a 38 minute flight from Indianapolis to Detroit. I was like, what the fuck? I got to listen to about five songs on my iPod before I had to put it away for the landing. Then we had an hour and a half layover, but everything went smoothly as soon as we got in Detroit. Our suitcase was coming just as we walked over to the baggage claim, and the shuttle to the parking lot we were parked in pulled up just as we walked outside. That will never EVER happen again!

ANDANDAND I GOT A FUZZY ED HARDY HOODIE WHILE IT WAS 108 DEGREES OUTSIDE AND I WORE IT HOME AND I FUCKING LOVE IT TO PIECES. IT'S WARM AND FEELS REALLY NICE.

I'm so tired right now. I'm working on two hours of bad sleep on the plane and one hour of sleep in my bed. THREE HOURS OF SLEEP AND I'M FEELING LOOPIER THAT A FRUIT LOOP!!!! :iconimhappiestplz:

And holy shit, I heard the new song for Tokio Hotel. Even though it wasn't even a full minute (just a sample) I already love it. I CAN'T WAIT FOR THE ALBUM TO COME OUUUUUUUTT! AND I'M STILL COLD AND TIRED AND I FEEL LIKE A ZOOOOOOOOOOOOMBIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIE :iconzombieplz:

]]> *nikkynikki I'M DONE! For Real This Time! http://nikkynikki.deviantart.com/journal/26635389/ http://nikkynikki.deviantart.com/journal/26635389/ Sun, 16 Aug 2009 18:43:30 PDT real this time! :icongivemesmilesplz:

Yes, this is about that Chaos Queen Story. I am officially finished with that bastard and it's all edited!

Granted, I'm sure there's still a few minor typos that Microsoft Word doesn't catch, but I don't care! I just read each one over three times and made some major changes and some minor ones. I'm just goddamned happy that I can officially say that I'm finished doing all that shit! :boogie: Yay for me!

88,126 words, and average of about 2,592. Lots of pages (yes I'm too lazy to count). Iskoola Pota font, size 11 (because I like to be different). 34 chapters including the prologue and the epilogue.

Hell am I proud of this.

:blackrose: Nik

]]> *nikkynikki The Sun Is My Enemy!! http://nikkynikki.deviantart.com/journal/26624431/ http://nikkynikki.deviantart.com/journal/26624431/ Sun, 16 Aug 2009 08:22:05 PDT
It sucked. :XD:

Welp, we're gonna be packing all day today and tomorrow before we leave. Our flight is around noon, so we'll probably be leaving around 9-ish. How fun. :P

Anyway...that's it. There's like nothing going on right now.

Oh, but I'll tell you this for a little laugh. We were right by FYE yesterday, so I decided to do a little music shopping while we were there. I saw the little tab for Cinematic Sunrise, and I grabbed a CD from it. I thought, 'This doesn't really look like their CD, but what do I know? I just heard of them not too long ago.' So I got it. Last night I came home to download it, then realized that it wasn't Cinematic Sunrise. It was The Cinematics. :bucktooth:

:blackrose: Nik

]]> *nikkynikki El. Oh. Effing. El. http://nikkynikki.deviantart.com/journal/26571595/ http://nikkynikki.deviantart.com/journal/26571595/ Thu, 13 Aug 2009 14:53:24 PDT This made me laugh so hard that I almost peed my pants. :lmao:

I usually don't do journals like this without a quick update, so I'll say that...uhm...oh! The Woodward Cruise is coming up! We're going on Saturday to spend the day there. It's gonna be sweet, 'cause we're parked at this one place where they go around with their smoothie samples. It was where I started my addiction to smoothies :D

:blackrose: Nik

]]> *nikkynikki Cat! I'ma Kitty-Cat! And I DanceDanceDance http://nikkynikki.deviantart.com/journal/26544844/ http://nikkynikki.deviantart.com/journal/26544844/ Wed, 12 Aug 2009 09:41:34 PDT

Everyone say happy birthday to my kitty :party:

:blackrose: Nik

]]> *nikkynikki Monsters fear the little kids under the bed http://nikkynikki.deviantart.com/journal/26480295/ http://nikkynikki.deviantart.com/journal/26480295/ Sun, 09 Aug 2009 09:17:19 PDT And we have a funeral to go to today.

Other news, I'm almost halfway done editing my story :D I'm so proud of myself. And I'll be writing out that little idea sometime today (maybe).

Next week on Tuesday, we'll be going out to California for ten days before coming back home on the 29th (we're leaving the 28th though, red-eye flight). Then four days after I get home I go to orientation for school, get my picture taken, get my locker, and figure out where my classes are. Then four days after that we go back to school. :iconimhorrifiedplz:

OH! And before I forget, *Marsille feature Nine Years of DA in her journal right here. I couldn't believe it when I saw it, because I felt that I could have done so much better on that. =p But, I'm not complaining!

:blackrose: Nik

]]> *nikkynikki Am I Spelling Shipshewana right? http://nikkynikki.deviantart.com/journal/26401639/ http://nikkynikki.deviantart.com/journal/26401639/ Wed, 05 Aug 2009 12:17:44 PDT And I got other stuff too, like a skull and crossbones lanyard, little converse keychain that matches the lanyard, and me and my mom decided to spend three whole dollars on a box of those 'smooth away' things.

AND I GOT A HAT THAT LOOKS LIKE THE ONE'S TOM WOULD WEAR! :iconimhappiestplz: I've been wearing it all day, and I love it...and I mean Tom as in Tom Kaulitz from the band I'm listening to. When I saw the hat I liked it. After I bought it from the guy who was selling it I realized that it was the kind of hat that he would wear. It's. Amazing.

Anyway, my laptop gave me some hell this morning, but after a long conversation with a Sony person, I was able to fix it without wiping out everything that I had on the computer. :phew:

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaand...that's it. :aww:

:blackrose: Nik

]]> *nikkynikki The Sun Hath Burned Me!! http://nikkynikki.deviantart.com/journal/26339857/ http://nikkynikki.deviantart.com/journal/26339857/ Sun, 02 Aug 2009 14:45:03 PDT
Well I remembered what I was going to say in that last journal that I forgot but remembered just now! I've finally gotten off my lazy ass and started editing that Chaos Queen story of mine. It's been two days and I got two chapters done!! The prologue and the epilogue oddly enough. :P

I'm avoiding the real chapter because they're scary and they bite :icongwahplz: Viscous little assholes...

Anyway, my daddy dearest informed me that I was turning heads while we were parked at the Gratiot cruise (had to let the engine cool). And I didn't notice because I was too busy eating a bag of potato chips and drinking a thing of pop :icondelightfulplz:

That's just like, the sexiest thing ever, right?! A girl stuffing her face with chips. :iconicameplz:

OHOHOH! And I got a lamp while I got my little 9" moose at Lowes yesterday. It's very entertaining because it's one of those touch lamps. I can touch anywhere on the lamp and it'll turn on. :iconiloveitplz:

]]> *nikkynikki Hair Has Nightmares About GTOs http://nikkynikki.deviantart.com/journal/26323033/ http://nikkynikki.deviantart.com/journal/26323033/ Sat, 01 Aug 2009 17:48:43 PDT

Anyway, yesterday was my parents' anniversary, so happy anniversary to them! Tonight we all went out to dinner for it at Olive Garden.

AND I GOT A LITTLE 9" MOOSE AT LOWES!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :iconlarryplz: I love him.

Anyway...I forgot what else I was going to say. Damn it, I've been doing that a lot. Anyway, That's all I wanted to really say I guess.

]]> *nikkynikki There's A Thief Among Us!! http://nikkynikki.deviantart.com/journal/26261875/ http://nikkynikki.deviantart.com/journal/26261875/ Wed, 29 Jul 2009 18:50:52 PDT
And the funniest thing happened in basketball today!! Y'know how on TV or movies they'll have people get slammed into the walls or something? Like, they'll go sliding on their ass into the wall. Well, I was trying to guard this girl (who, by the way, is way, way taller than me) when she got rid of her defender and went in for a layup. So I stepped in to help and our legs got all tangled. She fell, but because she already had the momentum for the layup she made me fall and slide into the bleachers on my goddamned ass! Like, it actually looked like I was sitting down and being pulled back into the bleachers!

It was a win-lose situation though. Popped my back, which I was glad about 'cause it really needed it. :D Now it hurts like hell all across that frickin' spot and I think I'll have a bruise :noes:

Seriously though, that was fucking hilarious! :lmao: Now I'm just waiting for the shower to open up. Jesus Christ, I'm all fucking sweaty and sticky...

:blackrose: Nik

]]> *nikkynikki *clap clap clap* Gotta go to the show... http://nikkynikki.deviantart.com/journal/26235557/ http://nikkynikki.deviantart.com/journal/26235557/ Tue, 28 Jul 2009 14:36:25 PDT

I hate the people who clap to that. :| It just totally ruins my movie experience.

Anyway, I just got back from the movies! I had my dad take me to see the new Harry Potter movie, and as for movies go, it was pretty good :D

Of course, there's things I wish were different...like Ginny's height. Of course, that can't be helped unless you have Daniel Radcliff wear platform shoes, but the fact that she's pretty much taller than him irks me so...

Anyway! All in all, it was pretty good. They didn't really screw things up so far as imagery goes (in my head), so it's all good. Like I said, for a movie that obviously had to cut back on a lot of things from the book, it was good. I just wish they would have explained the whole half-blood prince thing. I had to explain that to my dad on the drive back home. :P

:blackrose: Nik

]]> *nikkynikki Save The trees! Don't Do Homework! :D http://nikkynikki.deviantart.com/journal/26207571/ http://nikkynikki.deviantart.com/journal/26207571/ Mon, 27 Jul 2009 09:12:50 PDT So thanks you guys!

Anyway, back to what I was gonna say before...and I forgot what I was gonna say before...

Okay, onto an unrelated topic of what I was going to say: I've decided to grow out my highlights! I used a temporary dye to see what it would look like, and I really like it. So for the first time in about six years I'm going to have my natural hair color! :D

And last night I was watching this stupid movie Shark Boy and Lava Girl when I noticed that the kid who played Shark Boy looked a lot like Taylor Lautner (Jacob Black in Twilight). So I looked it up and apparently the reason they look so alike is because they're each other! :dummy: And Taylor was also the voice of Youngblood (from Danny Phantom). No, I'm not a crazed fangirl or anything, I was just bored...

And I've decided that instead of dwelling over the whole 'not being able to talk to my best friend because of her parents' thing, I'm just going to not talk to her at all. I thought long and hard about that, and it's the best thing I can do. So, I'm basically going to ignore her unless something serious comes up. And like I do every summer, I'm going to take a break from everyone else and just kind of hang around the house by myself for most of the summer. Maybe get my dad to take me tubing and go see a few movies, but I'm going to hang out by myself. I might have a few friends come over a few times, but that's it. And I'm going to watch summer go by while reading all the books that I know that I have to.

Well, I still don't remember what I was going to say in the first place. Oh well, maybe I'll remember later. :shrug:

:blackrose:

]]> *nikkynikki Realization. http://nikkynikki.deviantart.com/journal/26049369/ http://nikkynikki.deviantart.com/journal/26049369/ Sun, 19 Jul 2009 17:18:59 PDT
When I was a kid I was a pushover. I went with whatever people told me to do because I thought that if I didn't do it then they would leave me. So I would get taken advantage of all the time--especially in games and such--and wouldn't do a damn thing about it. Sometimes I would ask if they were really telling the truth about whatever they were cheating me out of, and they would assure me that they weren't. I knew they were lying to my face. I would let absolutely anyone and everyone step all over me until I was pounded so hard into the ground that I lost my sense of trust. Therefore I just unconsciously decided somewhere along the way to trust no one but myself.

Because of that, I constantly believe that no one really likes me for me. I feel used in ways that no one ever should, and I can barely trust my best friend's word. I always think that I'm not, nor will I ever be, good enough for anyone's standards, especially the people who I dare to call my friends.

Then there's the public, who I know that I'll never be able to satisfy. I always think that people are laughing at me, whispering about me (negative things of course), and overall think that I'm as much of a loser and failure as I believe I am.

And of course, because of what happened in the past, I can't bring myself to totally trust someone. I always think that people have nothing but negative thoughts and comments when I'm not listening, or when I'm not around.

It's not that I don't want to be able to trust anyone, because I do. I want to be able to sleep soundly at night without dwelling over some goddamned small statement that someone said and thinking that they don't really like me at all. I don't want to have to doubt my best friend's word just because I had no backbone when I was a kid. I want to be able to trust my friends instead of thinking that they all hate me and think I'm a failure. I don't want to feel like this anymore, it's going to end up killing me...

:blackrose: Nik

]]> *nikkynikki The Sandman Doesn't Like Me Anymore. [tiny edit] http://nikkynikki.deviantart.com/journal/25945513/ http://nikkynikki.deviantart.com/journal/25945513/ Wed, 15 Jul 2009 19:19:36 PDT years. Why? I don't know. That's just how depressed I was. And I'm sure that there's going to be more nights like this to come where I feel lower than dirt. Is that like, a withdrawal symptom? And is it possible to get withdrawal by being away from your best friend for too long? 'Cause if it is, then I know exactly what's going on. :|

Anyway, other news...there is no other news. I'm doing driver's training (segment two) and that ends on thursday. I'm babysitting tomorrow and on Friday, I'm being forced to go to basketball, and my parents and I might go to this...place...thingy on Tuesday. I have nothing to do.

...I'M SO GODDAMNED ALOOOOOOOOOOOOOONE! :cries:

I have no friends to hang out with because I'm a social spider! And the ones I do have are either unavailable (well one is.) or I can't keep a conversation going with them for longer than a half an hour--and that's if I'm lucky!

I hate this summer. I feel like I'm going to whither away and die this summer. And I can't say, "Oh, but I'm sure school's going to be right around the corner!" because labor day just had to be fucking late this year! Damn it!

For the first time in my whole life, I actually wish that I could be one of those goddamned preps at school who are social butterflies and can talk to absolutely anyone. But no, instead I'm the social spider who feels sick to her stomach just at the thought of having to be social in any form!

Shit, look at me I'm actually crying now. I hate this. I want to be able to start over and make new friends and keep some of the old but that doesn't happen in this hellhole of a town because once you're labeled you're labeled for life. And I'm labeled the antisocial emo girl who doesn't talk to anyone and just stays out of the way. Doesn't help that I'm not even close to being a twig like the other girls at school. And of course, you need confidence, which I have absolutely none of.

And I'm pretty much banned from seeing the person who makes me feel like I'm actually somebody. Whoop-de-fucking-do :|

Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go to bed, curl up, and die.

:blackrose: Nik

]]> *nikkynikki I stealded something from Incaptivity! D: http://nikkynikki.deviantart.com/journal/25878363/ http://nikkynikki.deviantart.com/journal/25878363/ Sat, 11 Jul 2009 11:16:29 PDT Incaptivity. I'm ashamed of myself :ashamed:

Your Boy Side
[x] You love hoodies. (If I can, I wear it. The only time I can’t is when it’s too hot...)
[x] You love jeans.
[ ] Dogs are better than cats. (I like them equally! :love:)
[x] It's hilarious when people get hurt. (Well duh, I thought everyone thought that...)
[x] You've played with/against boys on a team.
[x] Shopping is torture. (Most of the time, yes. It really depends what it’s for and how long I’ve been at home doing nothing.)
[x] Sad movies suck. (:shrug: usually)
[ ] You own an X-Box.
[x] Played with Hotwheels cars as a kid. (Yeah! My cousin and I played with ‘em alllll the time!)
[ ] At some point in time you wanted to be a firefighter.
[ ] You own a DS, PS2 or Sega.
[x] You used to be obsessed with Power Rangers. (Always wanted to be the yellow one ‘cause my cousin said I couldn’t be a guy and I refused to be the pink one.)
[x] You watch sports on TV. (From time to time)
[x] Gory movies are cool. (Dude, the gorier the better xD)
[ ] You go to your dad for advice.
[x] You own like a trillion baseball caps. (And other hats, but I do have a few of those.)
[ ] You like going to football games.
[ ] You used to/do collect baseball cards. (Nope, Pokemon all the way man! xDD)
[x] Baggy pants are cool to wear. (Sometimes.)
[x] It's kinda weird to have sleepovers with a bunch of people. (I’m anti-social though, so...)
[x] Green, black, red, blue, or silver are one of your favorite colors.
[x] You love to go crazy and not care what people think.
[x] Sports are fun. (When you’re not being totally competitive.)
[x] Talk with food in your mouth. (Heh, bad habit...)
[ ] Wear boxers.
Boyish: 17 (holy shit...)

Your Girl Side
[ ] You wear lip gloss.
[x] You love to shop. (Again, it depends what it’s for and how deprived of the public I’ve been.)
[x] You wear eyeliner.
[ ] You have some of the same shirts in different colors. (...what the hell is the point of that?)
[ ] You wear the color pink. (IT BURNS!!)
[ ] Go to your mom for advice. (I don’t go to my parents for advice.)
[ ] You consider cheerleading a sport.
[ ] You hate wearing the color black. (It’s my favorite color.)
[x] You like hanging out at the mall. (That doesn’t mean you have to be shopping!)
[ ] You like getting manicures and/or pedicures.
[x] You like wearing jewelry. (Just necklaces. I feel naked if I don’t wear one.)
[ ] Skirts are a big part of your wardrobe. (I think I own a total of two.)
[ ] Shopping is one of your favorite hobbies.
[ ] You don't like the movie Star Wars. (I loved it when I was a kid! Watched it every time my dad got a new one.)
[x] You are/were in cheerleading, gymnastics or dance. (I was young and foolish. I took a year of tap dance, hated it before it was over. Tried a cheer camp, hated that too.)
[x] It takes you around 1 hour to shower, get dressed, and put on make-up and accessories. (Only ‘cause I take me sweet time.)
[ ] You smile a lot more than you should.
[x] You have more than 10 pairs of shoes. (Over 20, actually...)
[x] You care about what you look like. (To a certain degree.)
[ ] You like wearing dresses when you can. (THOSE BURN TOO!)
[x] You like wearing body spray/perfume/cologne. (Minty fresh!)
[x] You wear girl underwear.
[x] Used to play with dolls as little kid. (Those and action figures, WHICH ARE NOT AND EVER WILL BE LIKE DOLLS.)
[ ] Like putting make-up on someone else for the joy of it. (It’s a hassle, actually.)
[ ] Like taking pictures of yourself with your cell phone/camera when you're bored. (I’m camera shy and hate having my picture taken.)
Girlie: 12 ...shit.

I knew I wasn’t that girlie but come on! 17-12? That’s bad.

And now I'm going to take a shower and spend an hour getting ready 'cause I have to go somewhere later :P

]]> *nikkynikki What's My Writing Style? http://nikkynikki.deviantart.com/journal/25821562/ http://nikkynikki.deviantart.com/journal/25821562/ Wed, 08 Jul 2009 16:04:41 PDT Why couldn't I write like this for my English teacher's one thing where she wanted a paragraph (5 sentences) for each...thing. I don't remember what it was, but damn I could've used all this writingness in that crap! Anyway, I'm bored so you don't gotta read this if you don't wanna...

1. Are you a "pantser" or a "plotter?"

I’m assuming that "pantser" means whipping out stories as you write and "plotter" means having the story already in mind. For long stories (novels) I’ll have the plot already planned out and ready to be written. As for short stories (by short stories I generally mean oneshots) I usually come up with ideas as I go along. There’s usually just one thing that I know for sure – the thing that gave me the inspiration for the story. That one part is usually just a small scene in the story itself. On rare occasions it’ll map out the whole story for me, but that’s only happened once or twice. You know the saying, “A picture’s worth a thousand words?” Well I take that saying literally in a lot of my writing.

2. Detailed character sketches or “their character will be revealed to me as a I write”?

Oh Jesus, that depends on what I’m writing, too. Same concept as before, it depends whether the story is going to be turned into a novel or if it’s going to stay a short story. Short stories: the character is revealed to me as I’m writing. Longer stories: the character is typically completely revealed to me not too far along into the story (a few chapters in usually). Such as my Chaos Queen story, even the minor characters have full bios in my mind—some even written out. I felt the need to in order to understand my story better, and it really helps me understand my main character(s). As for shorter ones such as Servants in Death (previously But She Can’t See!), the character develops as I’m writing and once I’m finished and start editing the character is completely exposed to me and I can almost always tell you their whole life story.

3. Do you know your characters’ goals, motivations, and conflicts before you start writing or is that something else you discover only after you start writing?

Generally that only happens for my longer stories. This is the reason that I usually can’t finish my novel concepts because I have the whole story planned out in my head, which doesn’t give me the motivation to write out the whole story. This is exactly why I have many short stories. I don’t have the spare time to figure out what’s going to happen when I take a break from writing, so I have the drive to finish it to the very end. With novels I have to constantly take breaks in my writing because I either get a headache, or I just need a break. During that break I frequently think of future things to use and then I end up playing out a whole chapter in my head. That’s quite a problem for me.

4. Books on plotting – useful or harmful?

I’ve never heard of them until now; therefore, I’ve never read any. I don’t plan to now that I have though. I believe that a writer shouldn’t have to grow upon someone else’s process. Just like with drawing, you’re only better once you develop your own style that you can proudly call your own. Until then you’re learning how to develop it through practice and experimentation. Sure, it’s nice to look at others’ work and help yourself develop while using them as models. It’s always better to have your own style, and that’s what makes you a great writer (or artist).

5. Are you a procrastinator or does the itch to write keep at you until you sit down and work?

When I really have an idea I absolutely have to write it out. Otherwise that’s all I can focus on. But if I over-think the story then, as I mentioned before, I’ll lose the drive to write because I, myself, already know where the story is going exactly. Sadly that caused about five stories to cut short before I even had the chance to start the first chapter (generally I do a short summary/intro/prologue to the story before writing).

6. Do you write in short bursts of creative energy, or can you sit down and write for hours at a time?

Both. Sometimes I’ll see a picture and suddenly have a brilliant story start to play out in my mind and once it’s all written out it’s done and over with. The bad thing about doing that is the fact that once I’m done writing it out the ideas that flow for the story come to a halt. Sometimes they’ll come back a while later, but typically they don’t. Writing in short bursts happens much more often than actually sitting down and writing for hours because my sources of inspiration are limited to how long I can write—... ]]> *nikkynikki Daaaamn.... http://nikkynikki.deviantart.com/journal/25731726/ http://nikkynikki.deviantart.com/journal/25731726/ Sat, 04 Jul 2009 09:20:17 PDT
Sam and I were in Kentucky for a bit and we just got back...and oddly enough the recent news is that I got my haircut again! (I found it way too funny that the last journal I put up I also got my hair cut...I also find that a bit sad :dummy:). Now I gots bangs for the first time in like, five years! :love: I'm loving how they look so much.

ANYWAY! Short news that I failed to mention while I was gone cause I was...well...gone. My dad tried to kill me -- a long time ago -- while we were playing basketball. I sprained my thumb (left of course), twisted my ankle (right), and got road rash on my left knee. Aaaaand...that's all I can really remember right now...

OTHER NEWSISH STUFF! I'm not single no more :la: But I'd bet you absolutely anything that none of you would be able to guess what kind of relationship (cause I'd also bet that many of you think that it's 'wrong' and such). Anyone who can guess -- even remotely -- gets a cookie :cookie:

Now I'm off to tell my mother news that I'm absolutely terrified of telling her because I keep going over worst-case scenarios and I'm a big baby anyway. Seriously though, I'm petrified. I'm shaking right now and just the though of telling her is making me sick and want to cry. But it's something I have to do 'cause she'll find out somehow, anyway...

]]> *nikkynikki 100 Themes Challenge [Lit Edition!] http://nikkynikki.deviantart.com/journal/21174001/ http://nikkynikki.deviantart.com/journal/21174001/ Thu, 15 Oct 2009 17:36:37 PDT EDIT: It's been a while since I actually updated this. I probably should, huh? I've been updating the folder, but the list still looks like I'm barely trying. I am though! The list that I have is marked off what I've done and what I haven't. I have one printed out and I have one on Microsoft. :bucktooth:

Anyway, I just want to say this right now: Almost everything that's been written on this MOST LIKELY wasn't inspired by the prompt on the list. I tend to write something, upload it, then decide to look over the list to see if it would fit with a category. There were probably only like, two of these things that were actually inspired by the prompt on the list, if that.

/Edit

I took the list from ~Delanor. Most of it will probably be prose because I don't write much poetry anyway. The bulleted ones are the ones I've done. Colors mean nothing. The link to the story is the little bullet beside it, which obviously signifies whether the prompt is checked off or not.

1. Introduction :bulletpurple:
2. Love :bulletblack:
3. Light
4. Dark :bulletblack:
5. Seeking Solace :bulletpurple:
6. Break Away :bulletblack:
7. Heaven
8. Innocence
9. Drive
10. Breathe Again
11. Memory :bulletpurple:
12. Insanity :bulletblack:
13. Misfortune
14. Smile :bulletblack:
15. Silence
16. Questioning
17. Blood
18. Rainbow
19. Gray
20. Fortitude
21. Vacation
22. Mother Nature :bulletblack:
23. Cat
24. No Time :bulletblack:
25. Trouble Lurking
26. Tears
27. Foreign
28. Sorrow :bulletblack:
29. Happiness
30. Under the Rain
31. Flowers
32. Night
33. Expectations :bulletpurple:
34. Stars
35. Hold My Hand :bulletpurple:
36. Precious Treasure :bulletblack:
37. Eyes