http://search.deviantart.com/?q=by:nomyai&section=today deviantART RSS for by:nomyai en-us Copyright 2009, deviantART.com Sat, 19 Dec 2009 11:48:21 PST deviantART.com http://blogs.law.harvard.edu/tech/rss http://s.deviantart.com/minish/widgets/apple-touch-icon-precomposed.png http://nomyai.deviantart.com/journal/27990883/ http://nomyai.deviantart.com/journal/27990883/ Tue, 27 Oct 2009 07:34:56 PDT
“Your Grandpa bought me in Zanzibar in 1910.”

So here’s the story from Gary’s Grandma about how she became a member of the family.

Grandpa, at 40 years of age, was the First Officer on a schooner out of Honolulu stopping over at Zanzibar. Figuring that he’d never get the chance to see anything like the Slave Market again, he goes for a stroll through the area. Randomly stopping to watch, he happens to look straight into the eyes of a 14 year old young woman, who’s about to go on the block. Grandpa is immediately smitten and approaches the auctioneer. After a bit of haggling on the side, Grandpa makes the sale and leaves with the young woman. The Captain, of course, is none too happy with what Grandpa’s done and refuses to let her on the ship. No problem, says Grandpa, I’ll take another ship home. Well, the Captain relents (not wanting to lose his First Officer) and everybody goes back to Honolulu.

This was embarrassing for Gary’s parents! Grandpa had bought Grandma. I think Grandpa should be commended for getting her out of there.

And before anybody goes…“Oh right, he’s 40 she’s 14 wink wink wink.” Grandma assured Gary that Grandpa was a perfect gentleman. He asked his sister if Grandma could live with her. Sister says sure and Grandma did until she was 18 and then married Grandpa.

To me, that is one of the coolest family history stories I’ve ever heard.

]]> ~nomyai http://nomyai.deviantart.com/journal/27484504/ http://nomyai.deviantart.com/journal/27484504/ Tue, 29 Sep 2009 11:36:20 PDT [link]

He tells me that I have to follow the rules, which I have conveniently posted below.

1. Post these rules.

2. Each tagged person must post 10 things about themselves on their journal.

3. At the end, you have to choose...???...well, it was garbled and I don't know what I was supposed to do.

4. Go to...???...garbled again so I'll have to wing this one, too.

5. No tag-backs. Is this like a touch back in US Football?

---------------------

So here's my 10 things.

As Roscoe Lee Brown's character, Mr. Jebediah Nightlinger, said in "The Cowboys"...

"And if it isn't true, it should be."


1. My parents were told, by my High School Guidance Department, that I was just two steps infront of being a complete idiot. I would do well ending up as a truck driver. Guess what, I have a PhD! I think I got the last laugh there. What I'm trying to say is, NEVER let somebody else tell you what you are not capable of doing.

2. I've held dying comrades in my arms too many times to want to mention. Why? I didn't want them to die alone.

3. I've been around the world 5 times. Four by air and once by water. Traveling is a blast, don't miss out.

4. I'm 6 foot 5 inch and weigh 30 pounds more than I want to.

5. I've been in combat. It's nothing to look forward to.

6. I'm a foaming at the mouth Capitalist.

7. I got disgusted with Christianity when I was 22 and became a Buddhist. I have no problems with God in whatever form he or she might take. I just can't stand the members of the fan club.

8. For someone who is as well educated and intelligent as I am (well I keep getting told that I am) I still can't spell worth a damn. It gets downright embarrassing.

9. After a lot of careful digging, I found that I am related to somebody famous. I'm a direct decendent of Ogg Thurnog, the Last Neanderthal.

Ok, now I understand that I'm supposed to tag 10 people. Ok, you 10 over there on the right, you're tagged! Get to it.

Oh, I forgot Number 10.

10. I don't Forward e-mails so I'm not going to forward this. Sorry kids, people don't need any extra whohaa in their sites here.


Happy Trails!

]]> ~nomyai http://nomyai.deviantart.com/journal/26854531/ http://nomyai.deviantart.com/journal/26854531/ Thu, 27 Aug 2009 10:54:23 PDT
Do enjoy.

---------------------------------------------

ASK DNA
by: The Seatbelts

Gummed up, brain dead and can't decide
you can't pray enough, you can't hide
You can be cool or you can cry
Do it wrong
Not it all
Or do it right

No one owes you, no one's to blame
Save for bad genes or DNA
Ask your conscience the why and how
Do it then
Do it when
But, do it now

What's up sweet cakes?
Who's hip anyway?
Earthgirls are easy
What you gonna do lil' buckaroo?
(Hey you, you better ask her nice!)
All you gotta do, happy fool, is ask your mom

No we all can't be Superfly, GQ - PhD - FBI
You can pretend or you can try
Move ahead
Lay down dead
Or slip on by

When the truth seems so farway
Buddha loves you and Jesus saves
You need answers for your dismay

Ask yourself
Ask your mom
Ask DNA

What's up sweet cakes?
Who's hip anyway?
Earthgirls are easy
What you gonna do lil' buckaroo?
(Hey you, you better ask her nice!)
All you gotta do, happy fool, is ask your mom

Kamakamakama ask your mama
Super groover Dahli Lama

What's up sweet cakes?
Who's hip anyway?
Earthgirls are easy
What you gonna do lil' buckaroo?
Come on!

What's up sweet cakes?
Who's hip anyway?
Earthgirls are easy
What you gonna do lil' buckaroo?
(Hey you, you better ask her nice!)
All you gotta do, happy fool, is ask your mom

]]> ~nomyai http://nomyai.deviantart.com/journal/26719271/ http://nomyai.deviantart.com/journal/26719271/ Thu, 20 Aug 2009 17:57:23 PDT



Life's Journey is not to arrive safely, at the grave, in a well preserved body. But rather to skid in sideways, totally worn out, bloody, battered and covered with scars shouting "HOLY SHIT...WHAT A RIDE!"

]]> ~nomyai http://nomyai.deviantart.com/journal/24822870/ http://nomyai.deviantart.com/journal/24822870/ Mon, 18 May 2009 13:42:08 PDT
My 3 personal favorites...

"If common sense is just that, why don't more people have it?"
- Mark Twain

"If you don't know where you're going, you're gonna end up there."
- Yogi Berra
(think about that for a minute)

"A woman can run faster with her dress up than a man with his pants down."
- Sally Opzal, a female Martial Arts instructor I know, to break the ice at her woman's self-defense classes.


And now, just stuff...


"If you can't understand it, it's intuitively obvious."
- unknown

"The Optimist says the glass is half full.
The Pessimist says the glass is half empty.
The Engineer says the glass is 200% of design specs."
- unknown

"As a Fighter Pilot only two bad things can happen to you and ONE of them will happen to you:

A - One day you will walk out to the aircraft knowing that it is your last flight in a fighter.

B - One day you will walk out to the aircraft NOT knowing that it is your last flight in a fighter."

- Royal Australian Air Force Flight Instructor Humor


And last but not least, I personally found this scribbled on the wall in a hospital I worked at, in Colorado.

"The only difference between this place and the Titanic is, THEY had a band."


If you have any silliness you'd like to share, let's hear them.

]]> ~nomyai http://nomyai.deviantart.com/journal/24545448/ http://nomyai.deviantart.com/journal/24545448/ Sat, 02 May 2009 09:47:44 PDT
Enjoy everybody

------------------------------------

DRAFTING GUYS OVER 60

I am over 60 and the armed forces think I'm too old to track down terrorists, you can't be older than 42 to join the military. Well, they've got the whole thing ass-backwards. Instead of sending 18 year olds off to fight, they ought to take us old guys. You shouldn't be able to join a military unit until you're at least 35.

For starters: Researchers say 18 year olds think about sex every 10 seconds. Old guys only think about sex a couple of times a day, leaving us more than 28,000 additional seconds per day to concentrate on the enemy.

Young guys haven't lived long enough to be cranky, and a cranky soldier is a dangerous soldier. "My back hurts! I can't sleep, I'm tired and hungry!" We are impatient, and maybe letting us kill some asshole that desperately deserves it will make us feel better and shut us up for a while.

An 18 year old doesn't even like to get up before 10 a.m. Old guys always get up early to pee so what the hey. Besides, like I said, "I'm tired and can't sleep, and since I'm already up, I may as well be up killing some fanatical SOB!"

If captured, we couldn't spill the beans because we'd forget where we put them. In fact, name, rank and serial number would be a real brainteaser.

Boot camp would be easier for old guys. We're used to getting screamed and yelled at...and we're used to soft food. We've also developed an appreciation for guns. We've been using them for years as an excuse to get out of the house, away from the screaming and yelling.

They could lighten up on the obstacle course, however. I've been in combat - and didn't see a single 20 foot wall with rope hanging over the side, nor did I ever do any pushups after completing basic training.

Actually, the running part is kind of a waste of energy, too. I've never seen anyone outrun a bullet.

An 18 year old has the whole world ahead of him. He's still learning to shave, to start up a conversation with a pretty girl. He still hasn't figured out that a baseball cap has a brim to shade his eyes, not the back of his head.

These are all great reasons to keep our kids at home to learn a little more about life before sending them off into harm's way.

Let us old guys track down those dirty rotten coward terrorists. The last thing an enemy would want to see is a couple of million ticked-off old farts with attitudes and automatic weapons who KNOW that their best years are already WAY BEHIND them.

How about recruiting Women over 50?! You think old men have attitudes? Oh, MY!

]]> ~nomyai http://nomyai.deviantart.com/journal/23555413/ http://nomyai.deviantart.com/journal/23555413/ Fri, 06 Mar 2009 11:20:05 PST
A NORTH POLE TATTLER EXCLUSIVE!

The North Pole Tattler, YOUR Honesty FIRST Tabloid, has learned today that a risqué pin-up style photo, of Mrs Claus, was found in the possession of an elf toy worker.

During a routine sweep, for pilfered toy parts, the photo was found in the locker of Olaf Luckyshoes, Lead Foreman of Workshop Number 12. “I…I…I have no idea how THAT got into my locker!” stammered Luckyshoes as he was dragged away, in chains, by members of Reindeer Security. As the doors on the Paddy Sleigh were slammed shut, the elf screamed “I’m being framed!”.

Santa could not be reached for comment.

--------------------------

What ever could this scandalous photo look like? Check our Gallery and find out for yourself.

Enquiring minds DEMAND to know.

]]> ~nomyai