http://search.deviantart.com/?q=by:notit&section=today deviantART RSS for by:notit en-us Copyright 2009, deviantART.com Tue, 15 Dec 2009 00:41:08 PST deviantART.com http://blogs.law.harvard.edu/tech/rss http://s.deviantart.com/minish/widgets/apple-touch-icon-precomposed.png http://notit.deviantart.com/journal/19437065/ http://notit.deviantart.com/journal/19437065/ Wed, 16 Jul 2008 22:44:40 PDT
Oh well. I guess History can't always be too kind.

]]> ~notit http://notit.deviantart.com/journal/14116746/ http://notit.deviantart.com/journal/14116746/ Sat, 11 Aug 2007 08:55:46 PDT
....why the fuck can't i delete my own DA? Retarded.

]]> ~notit http://notit.deviantart.com/journal/12424586/ http://notit.deviantart.com/journal/12424586/ Mon, 02 Apr 2007 00:36:32 PDT
]]> ~notit http://notit.deviantart.com/journal/9889121/ http://notit.deviantart.com/journal/9889121/ Mon, 28 Aug 2006 19:46:31 PDT ~notit http://notit.deviantart.com/journal/8679711/ http://notit.deviantart.com/journal/8679711/ Fri, 05 May 2006 08:13:35 PDT ~notit http://notit.deviantart.com/journal/6850888/ http://notit.deviantart.com/journal/6850888/ Mon, 24 Oct 2005 00:41:19 PDT
Doesn't mean I don't like you. ]]> ~notit http://notit.deviantart.com/journal/6550938/ http://notit.deviantart.com/journal/6550938/ Mon, 19 Sep 2005 23:43:31 PDT
but still, I wish more people would look at my stuff. Oh well, my life seems to be heavly undergratified. But that's okay, the people who don't watch back, comment back, or care can die in a pool of semen or menstration fluids. Or just both. ]]> ~notit http://notit.deviantart.com/journal/6446248/ http://notit.deviantart.com/journal/6446248/ Wed, 07 Sep 2005 22:47:18 PDT ~notit http://notit.deviantart.com/journal/6358320/ http://notit.deviantart.com/journal/6358320/ Mon, 29 Aug 2005 09:16:08 PDT


Okay, well, this journal is about Ninja. It's about something I can't write any where else.

I'm deeply hurt. No one really hurt me, I am really hurting myself. I go to sleep hoping that the next day my wishes will be fufilled. But that's really useless day dreaming.

She doesn't want me. I gotta tell myself that, no matter how it seems. I gotta drudge on. I gotta take my drudge and pure shit some where else. I'm so scared that I'll say stupid shit to her again. I'm scared shitless ontop of loathing myself for doing what I did. I don't know why I'm so bent out of shape. She doesn't like me in that way. It's just a girl.

Ontop of that, I'm a huge ugly monster. This apperence I hold is just a mask. I might look good, but that's a might. Under all this flesh and blood is a man who is really insane. I drive people away and it really hurts.

This weekend I made sure I was sore both Physically and Mentally. The mentally part came natural, because socially, my life is very unacceptable for some reason. No one will accept me for who I am. It's really upsetting, but oh well. Looks like I'll be alone for a long time. I don't want to be, but I have no other choice, do I? I could change, but that would be cheapping my soul. I want to be honest and down to the point. Let me tell you, it's extreamly hard. Everyone is being an asshole to me. I can't even tell people I'm sad, because they'll be in my business and won't respect my space. My family keep having eyes on me, they won't let me fucking be. No matter how much I tell them to let me have my space. They still treat me like I'm a fucking baby.

God, I really hate this situation. It's not the location. It's not the time. It's the truth in my life:

I'm severly not good enough for most people. I'm not good enough to make my own choices. I'm diffenently good enough to want to have a relationship with. I'm not good enough even to have any feelings. I feel so very betrayed, but it's the truth. ]]> ~notit http://notit.deviantart.com/journal/6323214/ http://notit.deviantart.com/journal/6323214/ Thu, 25 Aug 2005 08:59:39 PDT ~notit http://notit.deviantart.com/journal/6268504/ http://notit.deviantart.com/journal/6268504/ Fri, 19 Aug 2005 06:53:01 PDT
It's 7:43am and I've had a long night. I started to take my medication again, and this is one of the worst reactions I've had in a long time. My hands are still shaking from the reaction of the drug. Last night was pretty bad. It was really hard to fight myself from doing bad things. Like jumping out of a window. I'm not suicidle, it's one of the effects of this drug. I also fought crying, which I am still doing now. I feel like I've woken up from a bad dream. But it's not a dream at all. I'm really ashamed of myself. I don't really like myself, because there is nothing to like. I'm pretty much nothing but a burden on everyone. I'm not doing a self pitty party here, if I was, I would have posted this on livejournal or something. I'm suck a fuck up it's not even funny. I really want a friend I can cry on. But I don't have that option and I shouldn't even do so. That would just be using that person and making me a bigger burden.

I've changed, and for the most part I enjoy it. But I don't like the price I paid for it. I just feel like everything I do just ends up like shit. I feel that way, because it has. Some people say it isn't me, it's them. They react to me. So it is my fault. Everything I do is wrong and shitty.

I hate it. I want help, but I am certianly not going to get any. I hate help, even though I could use a good friend. Kiona doesn't like me when I'm like this, so it's not like I can go to her. In fact, I can't go to anyone.

I feel so tortured. I can't wait until I die. ]]> ~notit http://notit.deviantart.com/journal/4337312/ http://notit.deviantart.com/journal/4337312/ Sun, 16 Jan 2005 18:54:43 PST
look around my gallery. Leave comments, please. I'll do the same for you too. I swear. ]]> ~notit http://notit.deviantart.com/journal/3413694/ http://notit.deviantart.com/journal/3413694/ Tue, 21 Sep 2004 12:18:54 PDT ~notit http://notit.deviantart.com/journal/3368239/ http://notit.deviantart.com/journal/3368239/ Wed, 15 Sep 2004 08:19:29 PDT ~notit http://notit.deviantart.com/journal/3133453/ http://notit.deviantart.com/journal/3133453/ Sun, 15 Aug 2004 17:03:51 PDT ]]> ~notit http://notit.deviantart.com/journal/3105633/ http://notit.deviantart.com/journal/3105633/ Thu, 12 Aug 2004 06:36:58 PDT
I didn't mind DA4 until now. They need to work out ALL the bugs before releasing it. ]]> ~notit http://notit.deviantart.com/journal/3009252/ http://notit.deviantart.com/journal/3009252/ Sat, 31 Jul 2004 06:41:28 PDT
But I am a lazy man, and 2 a day is working out for me.

So if you like my poetry, just stick around. ]]> ~notit http://notit.deviantart.com/journal/2997223/ http://notit.deviantart.com/journal/2997223/ Thu, 29 Jul 2004 15:34:04 PDT
I have more stuff day by day.

I'm going to focus more on my poetry that I'm going to post.

K thx bye. ]]> ~notit http://notit.deviantart.com/journal/2927424/ http://notit.deviantart.com/journal/2927424/ Tue, 20 Jul 2004 16:50:35 PDT
So, that's what I'm doing.

Here is some random information about me:

I rock. ]]> ~notit http://notit.deviantart.com/journal/2924196/ http://notit.deviantart.com/journal/2924196/ Tue, 20 Jul 2004 05:32:37 PDT
Also, I just want to tell you that I found beauty.

That's all. ]]> ~notit