http://search.deviantart.com/?q=by:petit-chou-fleur&section=today deviantART RSS for by:petit-chou-fleur en-us Copyright 2009, deviantART.com Fri, 11 Dec 2009 14:36:38 PST deviantART.com http://blogs.law.harvard.edu/tech/rss http://s.deviantart.com/minish/widgets/apple-touch-icon-precomposed.png http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/23053905/ http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/23053905/ Sat, 07 Feb 2009 05:07:03 PST
I miss writing. Maybe some day I'll get back to it.
:<3:

]]> ~petit-chou-fleur http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/13405895/ http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/13405895/ Tue, 19 Jun 2007 11:02:35 PDT We got there like 5 hours before the gates opened... so we had a veeery long wait. We even resorted to picking indivdual sesame seeds off hot dogs just to pass the time... now that is extreme!
When we finally got inside, we were right at the front of the Golden Circles, we only had a few lines of people to the front and to the side - which was immense considering there was about 80,000 or so people there! As the tension and exciement grew, we ended up with soem idiots trying to push their way to the front, to which we responded with copious elbowing. I hate people like that, for god's sake face it, you didn't get there in time, so get lost, some of us had to work for our place (well not exactly work, but suffer huuuuuge boredom!).
So eventually, Muse entered from the centre of the stadium in a large puff of smoke, confetti, and classical music. You've got to love their style! And they walked down the walkway to the stage. I got within 2 metres of MUSE I am still in shock.
They opened with Knights of Cydonia - one of my favourites off their newest album, although I think it's a better closing track than opening... but hey. The stage was amazing, huge screens blasting the words of Knights of Cydonia, satellite dishes, crazy lights and the best graphics you'll ever see at a concert.
They played Citizen Erased and it was epic... that song is just overwhelming live, it never stood out so much on CD.
They played so many of their best songs... all the hardcore fans who went on Saturday definitely got what they deserved for buying their tickets first (we got ours on the pre-release day).
There were a few idiots who decided to start mosh circles - which did almost spoil it a bit, but Muse's talent and my sheer awe at them overcame all that rubbish!
Matt Bellamy is actually a god (I don't care if that's blasphemous), it was so worth completely wiping out my money supplies to stay in london for the weekend, and sacrificing revision for my exams (whoops). What other band had acrobats hanging from balloons at their concerts?? Being so close I got some good close ups of them... I always take crap videos though because my arms start to ache from holding up the camera lol!


I can't wait for the DVD to come out!!

And for exams to be over of course... today's english lit wasnt too brill, I really think all my revision power has burnt out... I just havent done as much as I should.
It'll all be fine!


But anyway besides muse-ness. And the horrid exams, the past week has been really good.

Amuse me. And hope you're all ok

petit-chou-fleur

]]> ~petit-chou-fleur http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/12655425/ http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/12655425/ Thu, 19 Apr 2007 13:42:53 PDT
And I will post a poem right now if I can summon the energy to go upstairs and get it... right I'm going... oh the effort lol.

Well things have been hectic a bit recently, I spent the easter holidays sleeping... what's wrong with not seeing the hours before 12 each day... I have to say getting up at 7 for school is wrong - and bring on study leave!

I can officially say I'm sick of A Levels now, its got to the point where I can't be bothered to start trying to get to the root of what I'm doing, they are just damn hard! It'll all be ok though, my english language investigation is thank god finally over (I hope), and seriously if you realised the unwarranted stress that has caused me you'd be celebrating with me (champagne anyone??)

I accepted my university offers, firm is york (AAA) and insurance Newcastle(AAB) so all is wlel with the future me hopes! I ahve fallen in love with York I'm so excited!

Went to see two of my best friends perform in their A level music recitals today. They were amazing, they both have their grade 8 distinctions. It's so amazing to know people who have so much talent and intelligence - they made me truly amazed to know them It's really interesting to think about how people you know affect your life. Because we're all leaving school soon I'm going through a really happy stage (not that I'm not generally a happy person), I keep making the most of knowing the people I know. There's all the traditions of the lunch time crew, the two crews for my two sets of frees, the lessons etc. It's gonna feel so weird that I have to make new traditions with people who right now I don't even know exist!


Anyway, now for that poem

Hope everyone is in a happy mood too

petit-chou-fleur

]]> ~petit-chou-fleur http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/11988137/ http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/11988137/ Tue, 27 Feb 2007 13:51:05 PST
I have actually written 2 poems in the past month (believe me thats a lot considering i wrote nothing for about 5 months!). I shall get them up here soon, I'm sorry they wont really be up to the standard of some of my others!

How is everyone? I am so sorry I need to look at deviations... I currently have 900 that's bad isn't it??

Well I havent really had much interesting go on recently. Except I suppose getting in to university and things! The Oxford dream didnt really happen lol, but I had the best time at interviews in December! I got into York though which was my second choice, so hopefully I'll go there, I have to get three As. It's pretty exciting though finding out where we all might end up in a few months' time! School is officially a drag now... the children are so up themselves, they have no respect for sixth formers, its despicable!

I'm counting down to being 18 now, it;'s not until may but im sick of not being able to go out for fear of being Id'ed, it doesnt help I look about twelve too But anyway the 18th parties have been fun you cant beat a good dance and a good drinking sesh.

Going to see Little man Tate tomorrow, yaaaaaaay. And if you don't know who they are then well, you're probably not the only one lol!

I never wrote about going to see Muse last November either. One word doesnt voer it but it comes close AMAZING!!! Everyone else who went will know what I mean, you have to go to know. The rhyme was good there! Whey.

Anyway I shall leave now.

And just remember: Poncho's make you happy (The Mighty Boosh ROCKS).

petit-chou-fleur

]]> ~petit-chou-fleur http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/9768492/ http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/9768492/ Fri, 18 Aug 2006 06:30:52 PDT 'Hold on to your kite, but just don't let me down'



Well you can safely say that yesterday was a great great day!
I was soooo worried about results, and it was so weird, because everything went the opposite to how I expected, I thought I'd done awfully in English Language and brilliantly in French!
So I go and get my results... and it turns out I got:

Maths (this was the one I was most shocked and excited about!) : an A, and I only dropped three marks in all three exams
English Lit (again shocked) : an A, full marks in both exams, I only lost marks in my January coursework
English Lang (amazed) : an A, full marks on the exam I thought went the worst out of all exams, and really high marks on other modules.
French (very proud of the amazing range of results here) : a B, I thought this exam went amazingly, and managed to get an E on one paper, rock on! I only passed it by 3 marks! But hey I still scraped a B so I'm still ecstatic! I was so proud of that E though, seen as I've never got one before!
General Studies: The most pointless subject ever (excluding key skills) and I didn't do any work, but still managed to get full marks in two exams and get an A, to be quite honest that is very sad... lol! doesn't dampen the happiness though, I wanted that A!

So yeah, basically yesterday I wanted to jump up and down all day, I'm still in disbelief, I keep thinking someone is going to send me a letter to say that actually they gave me the wrong results!

Then it was Sarah's ~Salix02's house for a partaaaaay. Which was excellent. We played lots of random games, I took some fantastic random photos of my friends, yeah stuff the art photography, silliness is so much funner lol (joke), aww my friends make me laugh so much! But yeah this summer holiday has been the best ever, I haven't had time to be bored I've been constantly busy or seeing friends and stuff and living at other people's houses! But we played hide and seek yesterday, we had some immense hiding places, and I think I was officially one of the worst seekers in the end (I didn't see :spunkiemunkie: laid out on the kitchen top), although in my defence it was dark! Then played twister, which made me feel like all my limbs we about to be wrenched off... ow!!! Then watched White Noise, we thought it was crap when we went to the cinema, but when we actually watched it properly it's actually quite freaky... just shows how talking over a film affects your view of it!

Aaaaaaaaanyway work later today and then tomoro another party and driving lesson later today as wlel, so yeaaah Rock on....

Hope everyone else who got results yesterday did really well! And I didn't mean to sound gloaty up there, I am shocked and amazed and just wanted to share it lol. Anyway I'll shut up now!

petit-chou-fleur ]]> ~petit-chou-fleur http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/9686661/ http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/9686661/ Fri, 11 Aug 2006 04:39:50 PDT 'Remove whatever makes you hurt, but I am too weak to be your cure'

Well I just logged on for the first time in a couple of days maybe and the whole new look gave my quite a shock! It's really different, I think it's gonna take me a while to find where all the different things are, I can't work out if I like it that much or not! I don't think the poetry looks so good on a main page because it doesn't show a preview image anymore it just has the words which looks a bit untidy sort of. But then again change is good!

I had a great holiday and have been doing loads of stuff recently, I'm quite shocked how well this summer is turning out! Went to the seaside yesterday and built sandcastles, except that it kept raining a bit, damn English weather. Went to Durham a couple of days ago which is a gorgeous place, but sounds ridiculously difficult to get into the university! We also had this really sexist tour guide who seemed to really lack proper social skills, he tried to be funny and he really failed at every attempt. It reminded me of someone I know actually lmao.

Only bad thing about to crop up is results day, which makes me want to curl up in a corner and go silently mad... but hey I'll just have to do my best not to feel like I might stop breathing from being so nervous about it. Hopefully it'll turn out with some good bits!

Errrrrm I'm totally putting off all my schoolwork... probably not a ogod plan, but I can't be bothered to do my personal statement for uni applications either, the thought of it makes my stomach turn, whereas if I sat down and did it it'd probably be ok.

Aaaaanyway, my driving's been going ok, I've got another driving lesson later today, I just want to be able to afford a car, it's so unfair how some people just get bought them hmph.

And oh yeah I'm sorry I haven't actually done anything artistic for the past two or three months, I feel really bad, I don't think I've sat down and even tried to write any poetry in a looong time... And I'm also sorry because I haven't been able to actively comment on the deviations in my inbox or even look at them properly, there's so much good art from all the people I watch that it's just piling up in my inbox, I'll do my best to stop that, it's not good, and seems to defeat the whole point of me being on this site

Hope everyone's ok, what you all been upto?

petit-chou-fleur ]]> ~petit-chou-fleur http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/9363055/ http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/9363055/ Thu, 13 Jul 2006 09:25:36 PDT 'Don't waste your time or time will waste you'

Whhheeeeey!
Several reasons I have to be happy:

1. I'M GOING TO SEE MUSE IN MANCHESTER IN NOVEMBER!

2. I'M GOING ON HOLIDAY TO BELGIUM/FRANCE ON MONDAY

3. STRAIGHT AFTER I'M GOING TO MENORCA!

4. LOCO ROCO IS THE BEST GAME EVAAARRR (bouncing blobs, you can't beat em!)

5. AND YEAH IT'S JUST COOL... LOL

6. I WENT TO SEE THE RED HOT CHILI PEPPERS LAST WEEK

7. LAST DAY OF SCHOOL TOMORROW!

So yeah, there's a quick rounding up, I am just rather happy filled at the moment, sorry there's not going to be any more art of the way because of my holidays, but when I get home I shall do my very best to find something to post!

And as a final thought, I love looking at photos, it's like memories made into a thing, whey! And yes, that was random...

Over and out peopleeee, hope you're all good!

petit-chou-fleur ]]> ~petit-chou-fleur http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/8950402/ http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/8950402/ Fri, 02 Jun 2006 13:14:33 PDT hmph, it's gone so quickly.

Worked Sunday and Monday evening, and then stayed at work to play the quiz and bingo, I didn't win my boss did though lol! We had a laugh anyway, I love the people at my work, they're crazy!

Erm camped out at ~jazzman88's house for a couple of days , which was fun and very random. Went into Leeds yesterday with her and ~Salix02 and spent an hour and a half looking for somewhere we wanted to eat lunch, decided on TigerTiger (a rare occurence is a decision considering we're stupidly indecisive!) but then got told that we can't eat there without an over 18, 'under new laws' apparently, how stupid! So we ended up in pizza hut... mistake... big mistake. Our waitress, as Sarah aptly put it was 'suicide on a stick', was totally rude, 'whada you want'. To make it worse they couldnt cope with the amount of people wanting buffet, so there was no pizza in Pizza Hut (without waiting about 20 minutes for one slice), ridiculous. Everyone was totally pissed off lol! So to pay them back I swapped all the silvers for coppers and we paid our bill with loads of change, and just to make my point about bad service (I'm a waitress and those people really needed to get a grip on what customer service actually is) we left her a lovely tip of 1 penny and 7 euro cents we found in Yasmin's purse! Haha and then ran for it....

After that episode lol, which I had to tell, went to a gathering at my other friend's today, I ate too much ice cream and felt sick, and also took rnaodm pictures of each other, I look as if I'm totally drunk on one, such is the fun of taking the mick out of myspace posing!


:devpetitchoufleur:

My Top Artists
1. The Kooks
2. Panic! At The Disco
3. Feeder
4. Orson
5. Jack's Mannequin
6. Red Hot Chili Peppers
7. Alkaline Trio
8. The All-American Rejects
9. Mae
10. Fightstar ]]> ~petit-chou-fleur http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/8882261/ http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/8882261/ Fri, 26 May 2006 09:57:43 PDT

And yes I am very happy
Well for the majority, they went reasonably well, just gotta wait for resuuullllts now, long wait hmph

Anyway I'm gonna try and get more poetry written, and generally use this precious time of nothingness to chill out completely before my A level year gets under way. So I can actually get round to addressing the mounting pile of your deviations I've left unchecked recently, sowwee!

Anyway, can't believe I got through that week to be honest, wasn't the easiest, but I did get to sit around and do absolutely nothing in the common room for hours between exams and have a laugh, shame I don't get to skive off anymore when we go back ¬_¬ oh well lol

Anyway tell me how you've all been and what you've been upta I want to know, I've been to neglecting of dA

Lots of love
~petit-chou-fleur ]]> ~petit-chou-fleur http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/8737990/ http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/8737990/ Thu, 11 May 2006 08:44:37 PDT Mood: Happy (I think)
Listening To:The Lights and Buzz - Jack's Mannequin
Reading:Wise Children by Angela Carter

'I'm coming home to the lights and buzz,
things look the same still nothing's as it was'

Well I'm ok considering exams are just around the corner! But then again it's a whole year since we left for GCSE study leave on Saturday :jawdrops: I still stand by year 11 as one of the best years ever, leaver's day and the prom Anyway, it's my birthday party on Saturday weeeeee! And it's my birthday on Tuesday , and as a lovely birthday present I've been given a French speaking exam (don't you think it's such a lovely gift?!) Well I think revision's ok, I'm improving (I think ) Wish me luck

Hopefully should be going bowling tomorrow too, to commemorate a year since 30 of us went on leaver's day, how has a year passed so quick, it makes me feel pretty sad actually, my life's passing me by and I don't even notice until it gets around to things like that. And to be honest, not that much has changed, *sigh*.

Aaaaanyway I have got some poetry I could post, it's not all that fantastic, but I promise I will post it to let you know I'm not dead.

In other news The Kooks rock

Muchos love

petit-chou-fleur ]]> ~petit-chou-fleur http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/8652462/ http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/8652462/ Tue, 02 May 2006 13:36:27 PDT ArchieC

Rules:
The 1st player of this "game" starts with the topic "6 weird habits/things about yourself" and people who get tagged need to write a journal about their 6 weird habits/things as well as state this rule clearly. Alert those you tag by note or comment

Right, so... "6 weird habits/things about yourself". here goes.

1) I get frustrated with myself a lot
2) I get slightly obsessed with being successful
3) I hate it when people leave plugs switched on with nothing plugged in
4) I'm sick of liking hte same damn perosn for like a year or something totally ridiculous
5) I can't bottle things up or I just end up depressed
6) errrrm I am addcited to All American Rejects and Panic! at the disco right now...

Yeah I hate thingking of stuff for those sort of things!

Hope everyone's ok, I just posted a poem finally! It's a bit long, sorry guys, but please take time to look I really appcreciate it, you don't have to read it all in one go!

much

petit-chou-fleur ]]> ~petit-chou-fleur http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/8551223/ http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/8551223/ Sat, 22 Apr 2006 13:15:29 PDT 'So a day when you've had your fill of thinking'

Well I'm just back from my relaxing holiday! I'm sorry guys I haven't been around and things aren't gonna get much better for another month, exams are creeping up round the corner, and I've got a long hard slog ahead of me, I'm gonna try and post some new deviations very soon though I promise!

I'm not going to be able to checky my deviations pile properly, so if you really want me to look at any of your work that you posted in the past three months please just let me know and I'll be sure to drop by your gallery and leave a comment! Other than that I'm just going to have to wipe my inbox, as silly as it seems!

Hope everyone is good, I haven't spoken to all you lovely people in aaaaages! I still love you all really I do! I'll be back when time allows me which should be soon



petit-chou-fleur ]]> ~petit-chou-fleur http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/8093174/ http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/8093174/ Tue, 07 Mar 2006 12:26:41 PST 'We prey as wolves among the sheep and slit the necks of soldiers while they sleep.' I just realised how morbid this song is... ¬_¬

Well I had the funnest day evarrrr... not. First sick day in years I think, so fun to sleep and throw up all day, really
Then forced myself to type up my English coursework, the stress!

Anyway, lately I became single once again, which made me surprisingly happy for some reason, think I need more alone time. And also have become obsessed with trying to get into Oxford University, I think I have issues with perfectionism really, I keep getting frustrated about grades too, I really don't wanna have to resit any English Literature.

Aside from my moaning I have a lot of work to do on poetry when I get chance, there's a lot started but not finished, I'll do my best. Also I'm struggling with my deviation pile, I'll do my best to comment, but I promise I will look at everyone's work at least!

Looooveee

petit-chou-fleur ]]> ~petit-chou-fleur http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/7933138/ http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/7933138/ Sat, 18 Feb 2006 10:13:10 PST 'In the fifty year night, these are the words that crawl out of the wall'
From The Devil's Wife by Carol Ann Duffy

I finally got round to writing a journal!!! Anyway, hectic juggling of school, school work, work and social activity, and in between finding time to relax with music or a book have sort of caused me to neglect the internet and deviantart. I have posted a few poems recently though, and I'm really grateful for all the feedback everyone's given me
I've done more excercise in teh past two days than I think I've done in six months before, two hours of badminton, which included a fair amount of victories which is always good and running about three quarters of a mile, it was worth the running though! Me and ~Salix02 have tickets to go see The Red Hot Chili Peppers in July in Sheffield I really can't wait it should be a great show!
School work's going well, I think, I'm still addicted to some of the lines in Carol Ann Duffy's poetry we're studying. Had a big argument with two of my friends yesterday who hate her because apparently she only writes to insult men, I said it's called opinion and insight...
Well I have a huge pile of all everyone's artwork to get through, dammit why is it all so good! I promise it'll be commented on eventually, when is another matter, it's not going to be deleted though.
Now to buy some Cds, to feed my addiction to spending...

petit-chou-fleur ]]> ~petit-chou-fleur http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/7683344/ http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/7683344/ Mon, 23 Jan 2006 08:58:05 PST 'Jet engine to the centre of the storm'

Wow, I really need to catch up with this place, I miss it, yet I still don't find time

Well first thing's first, a huge huge thank you!!!
I think you should all go to:
's page and give him big hugs because he bought me a three month subscription
Now I can look at all your deviations properly and not miss anybody out!


Well I suppose you could say some stuff has been happening, going out with friends, working, going to school, doing an evil maths exam, and seeing my boyfriend etc etc etc.
Yeah... and I'm crazily addicted to raspberries and pasta, mmmm, and eating all the desserts in the kitchens at work, I do wonder why I'm not fat.

In poetry news, I really will pose that poem I had left to post now, I promise! I'll do it right away! I've written about 10 poems in the past two days, none of which are fit to post, they need a hell of a lot of work, and a lot of the lines need transferring so that each poem isnt skipping about all over the place. Oh yeah and English Lit at school is the best because we've been doing Carol Ann Duffy poetry, it's really really good, I love reading it, and I'm so inspired to writa about it, it's doing my grades loooads of good

Anyhow, away from the egotistical world of me, I can't believe the whale died in London poor thing

petit-chou-fleur ]]> ~petit-chou-fleur http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/7337485/ http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/7337485/ Sat, 17 Dec 2005 14:31:37 PST Mood: Great
Listening To: The Blower's Daughter - Damien Rice

Well last Saturday I journeyed into London with my Dad who lives only an hour's train ride away. That was pretty cool, London has grown on me amazingly, it's such a wonderful place. Stopped at Planet Hollywood for lunch after shopping in Harrods I'd never been before, it's bloody huauge in there! Had fun dreaming about riches. Went around Covent Garden and got halfway down Oxford Street. I want to live in that Topshop! Anyway...

Went to a friend's last night. We built a human pyramid, I had to go on the top though, not nice to peer down at the concrete Errrm, I became part of a small people's exhibition, I had to be Exhibition 1, hmph, I don't like being classified as small! Well yeah, I don't actually care, but yeah, huhum.

I finally wrote some more things! I posted a Haiku today, I ahve two more on the way to being posted too. Both are pretty much un-editied and they're really different to a lot of my other stuff. But I want some honest critique please!! Sorry I've been so inactive, but hopefully this new material will get me back on here again, I still feel liekt he creative spark hasn't quite returned though.

My god I ramble. Bye bye

petit-chou-fleur ]]> ~petit-chou-fleur http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/7227777/ http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/7227777/ Mon, 05 Dec 2005 09:57:56 PST Mood: Well let's not even go there
Listening To: Space Dye Vest - Dream Theater

Walking home form school today, my mind was comepltely flooded with poetry and memories. Everywhere I looked I could hear the words in my head, shame I've lost the ability to get it down on paper really. It's that which owes to me not really being too active on here anymore. Sure I make sure I comment on people's work, look at it, answer comments, see how people are doing. But is such a rare input really worth anything. My gallery's more like a memory than a work in progress.
Anyway I got home, I watched the snowman, basically cried all the way through. It's so sad and happy, I love it Then I was in the mood for pensive music, so I thought I'd relive the obsession I used to have with A Change Of Seasons and Space Dye Vest by Dream Theater. Wow. I'd forgotten just how meaningful those songs are. They really make me think about everything I suppose I don't really wanna bring to the forefront, but then again need to get out of my system, if that makes a blind bit of sense...
I keep feeling like something's dying in me, the fact that it's December again, a whole new December to write over the old one. The old one full of memories I'd just love to relive. If you asked me I couldn't really name the significance... well I suppose I could. But it's all the little things that happened. The fact that I saw so much fo friends, talked about things that mattered, and truly had that excitement in my stomach a lot of the time. There's nothing like that feeling, and it doesn't occur too often either.
Well I feel like such a hypocrite posting all this emotional crap on here, after all who cares, but this is just me getting stuff off my chest. This is what is takes for me to change anything on my page and add a journal or any art... not obligation, just the urge, that's such a weird word.
Yeah I could go into depth, but I'm not sure i want the whole interior of my head here for any stranger who bothers to read this, I need a tree to talk to... I really do...

petit-chou-fleur ]]> ~petit-chou-fleur http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/7036175/ http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/7036175/ Sun, 13 Nov 2005 13:30:43 PST Mood: Excellent

10 Things You Like

1.Music
2.Books
3.Poetry
4.Food
5.Hyperness
6.Talking
7.Success
8.Meeting new people
9.Sleep
10.Cinema

3 Things That Make You Happy

1.Friends
2.Family
3.Feeling loved (by the poeple above )

3 Things That Anger You

1.Ignorance
2.Corruption
3.Arrogance


10 Things That You Hate

1.People with orange faces.
2.Not being able to dispose of thoughts
3.Writer's block
4.Learning French vocab - come to think of it I haven't actually as yet...
5.Murder
6.War
7.Lies (the big ones, little ones don't count)
8.Gherkins, yuck!
9.That there's not enough time in a day
10.Being away from people for too long.

3 Facts About Your Name

1.There are 6 people with the same first name as me in my English Language class :S
2.It means 'princess' in Hebrew.
3.It has a 's', 2 'a's and a 'h'

5 Facts About Yourself

1.I don't have a religion
2.I look young for my age
3.I'm rarely ever depressed
4.I looove shopping!!
5.I rarely ever fancy anyone...

2 Things You Expect (at least for now)

1.That I'm gonna have to go to school tomorrow...
2.That tomorrow I will feel even more tired than i do right now!

4 Random Thoughts

1.I want to leap up and down in a mad way.
2.I am really hot (as in temperature)
3.I really should do my english lit coursework...
4.I want my feet to stop hurting

Song you're listening to (give artist)

Feels Just Like It Should - Jamiroquai

Time?

8:56pm

10 People you'll tag this to: (no particular order)
~petit-chou-fleur http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/6979251/ http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/6979251/ Mon, 07 Nov 2005 09:12:49 PST Mood: Confuddled
Listening To: Wherever You Will Go - The Calling

Oh my god I just rediscovered this song, one word and 7 letters A-M-A-Z-I-N-G I don't think I've ever bothered to listen to this album even though I've had it three years - tis gut!

Anyway, there isn't too much to fill you in on. After all I'm not gonna make out my life is fantabulously interesting! But in half term I went to Whitby for a few days. Came back and had non stop social events for two days, hehe, and got to know some new people, which is something I always enjoy doing!

School is incredibly busy and I have so much work I shouldn't really have time to do anything else, but I just feel like I have no energy left. Sleep is needed desperately... But I've been having quite a few laughs with various people recently... involving mafia boss accents and chucking yourself down stairs... yes I do know some worrying people!

Anyway, there isn't much art in the works, but I'll do my best to keep active on here. I have a lot of deviations to get through, so I'm gonna try and get a subscription as soon as I can so that I can check them more effeciently!



petit-chou-fleur ]]> ~petit-chou-fleur http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/6774156/ http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/6774156/ Sat, 15 Oct 2005 11:12:04 PDT Mood: Happy
Listening To: Made For Each Other/You Can Breathe - Jack's Mannequin
Reading: Charlotte Gray by Sebastian Faulks

'You can breathe, you can breathe now
You can breathe, but the air is running out

You waited for me in the rain
In the parking lot
Cold hands, lips blue
Clothes stuck to you
Some air'd be good for you

And you walked for miles down
The shores of California to the
Coast of Mexico where you could hide
And no one'd have to know'

I was tagged by ~justpolly
So here is my set of randomness:
1) If I get frustrated with anyone it's myself.
2) I say random evil things for effect
3) If I have too much fun I start to leap around wildly (something you don't want to see)
4) I tend to keep things to myself.
5) My sister read the most private part of my diary
6) My accent is a blend of Southern and Northern, I no longer belong anywhere
7) I have an obsession with Jack's Mannequin
8) I actually find my life really boring, even though I shouldn't.
9) I find it fun to take the mick out of people who are in relationships, teehee
10) There's not enough time in the world for all teh things I'd often prefer to be doing.
11) I find it hard to be myself sometimes.
12) I need to stop putting on an act to seem like I want attention...
13) I believe in fate completely.
14) Poetry is a magical way to write down a feeling, emotion or situation.
15) Keeping things bottled up only causes you to implode in the end.
16) I'd love to be able to speak a foreign language fluently, but that's never gonna happen...
17) Nothing is ever perfect enough
18) I talk in my sleep, not something to be proud of really...
19) I'll often lie just to cover up what I really think about something.
20) Is it bad to be obsessed?

So yeah, that was quite hard! I've spent the past two days shopping I got paid yesterday and now I have very little left, but I have new clothes, and my wardrobe is not so miniscule. Haven't written any poetry in aaaaaages, so nothing new to put up except stuff that I wrote a while ago.

I go on holiday next weekend do I won't be on here for a week, but I might get some nice shots to post here

That's about all now

petit-chou-fleur ]]> ~petit-chou-fleur http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/6687245/ http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/6687245/ Wed, 05 Oct 2005 13:58:03 PDT Mood: Tired!!
Listening To: Cave - Muse

'Please close your ears
And try to look away
So you never hear a single word I say
And don’t ever come my way

Leave me alone
It's nothing serious
I’ll do it myself
It's got nothing to do with you
And there's still nothing that you could do'

It's strange how there's certain CDs you can never get into and then suddenly you're addicted, I disliked Muse's album Showbiz for ages, and now I could seriously debate that it's the best one!! Showbiz and Cave are just awesome songs

Well yesterday was an absolutely groovay day! Besides getting only about 3 and a half hours sleep I had one of the best days in along time! We had to set off from school at half past six, because it takes about 4 hours to get to London from Leeds! I went with the people who do History, because Me and a couple of others got randomly invited along as there were some places left.
Laughed a lot... vowed to go on a search for Farmer Maggot who has a fear of sitting down, a fear of buttons and of squares... don't ask... got told I look like a vegetarian... found out Michael Jackson tried to buy the Queen's throne in the house of commons... what an idiot... and got ever so slightly hyper on the journey back...
Haha it was an excellent day, I don't often get to go to London anymore, it's quite strange considering I used to go fairly often! We didn't get chance to go shopping or buy food really either, we were like a starving pack of wolves when we reached a service station on the way home... thank you KFC!!!

Spent most of today trying to keep my eyes open and do some work... and I really should ahve gone to bed an hour ago... I'm such an idiot... and I still haven't posted that poem!! Argh!

Anyway I'll love you and leave you again... the second journal in two days! Wo0o although at least I had some purpose this time...


petit-chou-fleur ]]> ~petit-chou-fleur http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/6668866/ http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/6668866/ Mon, 03 Oct 2005 13:14:14 PDT I guess I just haven't had the motivation to be bothered to write anything that's been going on in my mundane life. So well into AS courses now, everything seems to be going fine, and I'm just starting to motivate myself to put the proper amount of effort into essays and such.

I started my new job two weeks ago at a nearby restaurant and bar, so that'll give me a chance to go on a good shopping spree in the near future!

I have a poem I want to post but I haven't been bothered to get round to it recently lol, it's not the best but it is something to post, after all I haven't really been producing much quality stuff recently.

Errm, not much else to report to you I'm afraid, love life is as dead as ever... oh yeh I've been in a lot of very strange moods recently, often involving some of the most rnaodm crap you've ever heard and a lot of giggling... hmmm, as well as randomly feeling antisocial, yay for being an adolescent!!

Hope you're all having fun, I haven't heard form most of you in ages, I seem a bit more distanced form this place recently...

Hope you're all well

petit-chou-fleur ]]> ~petit-chou-fleur http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/6668859/ http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/6668859/ Mon, 03 Oct 2005 13:13:21 PDT I guess I just haven't had the motivation to be bothered to write anything that's been going on in my mundane life. So well into AS courses now, everything seems to be going fine, and I'm just starting to motivate myself to put the proper amount of effort into essays and such.

I started my new job two weeks ago at a nearby restaurant and bar, so that'll give me a chance to go on a good shopping spree in the near future!

I have a poem I want to post but I haven't been bothered to get round to it recently lol, it's not the best but it is something to post, after all I haven't really been producing much quality stuff recently.

Errm, not much else to report to you I'm afraid, love life is as dead as ever... oh yeh I've been in a lot of very strange moods recently, often involving some of the most rnaodm crap you've ever heard and a lot of giggling... hmmm, as well as randomly feeling antisocial, yay for being an adolescent!!

Hope you're all having fun, I haven't heard form most of you in ages, I seem a bit more distanced form this place recently...

Hope you're all well

petit-chou-fleur ]]> ~petit-chou-fleur http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/6511668/ http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/6511668/ Thu, 15 Sep 2005 12:58:13 PDT
In other news I got told I've been put in for the Science Prize at school, how the hell that happened I don't know! I always though Science was one of my worst subjects...

We had a great English Lit lesson today, no teacher there, and they don't provide subs when you're in sixth form so we about 5 of us had a huge conversation, it's not often you actually get to talk about anything that means anything at school.

Also got to finish Maths early as well cuz the teacher had to go, so it's been a good day I suppose!

I'm doing my Grade 5 violin exam next summer so I'm really gonna have to start practising, because I really want to put in the work for it, I never have before and it's definitely shown in the past, I'm determind to 'pass with merit' this time rather than just straight 'pass'. Not that anyone cares hehe.

I really hope the rain stops tomorrow...

petit-chou-fleur ]]> ~petit-chou-fleur http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/6430926/ http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/6430926/ Tue, 06 Sep 2005 10:35:58 PDT
Last Monday it was Emma's (~duveau23) birthday party so we were all at her house for aaaages. Everyone seemed to be going for 'walk and talks' which was quite odd, people seemed to find a lot to talk about, I only went on one though because I never have much interesting to say hehe. Well as far as I heard there were a few confessions and confusions, and I had to start giving some advice It was a pretty good night but a few hours before the end I was in a bit of a bad mood, hehe brain torture once again

On Tuesday a big group of us all went into Leeds, we had pizza at Pizzamania and I ate too much and felt sick and got a stomach ache that worsened throughout the day. Got last minute things for school, took back some shoes and got some other ones, bought a couple of tops and waited for ages for Mark and Danny (~121divided121) went to buy this badminton racket they'd already stared at for ages... don't ask me... Then decided to go home because Em was already an hour late home and I really felt like I was gonna throw up which was awful eek Luckily after a while it went away, I hate it when there is no way you can lay down to make the pain go away...

Wednesday I decided I'd take back everything I bought the previous day, hehe I'm really bad at buying things... collected job application forms, and walked round an absoutely swelteringly humid Leeds for only about an hour before we just decided to go home...

Thursday I went and handed in job applications...

Friday was out sixth form induction day at school, which was basically just confirming A Level options and working out predicted grades, just sat around most of the day chatting, which after about the first hour was a bit boring. Our common room is the biggest one and we still have nowhere near enough space for us all, at lunch we're all crammed in and having to sit on tables and stuff to fit...

Err Saturday night went to see the 40 year old virgin with Matt (=SpunkieMunkie) haha, it was quite randomly hilarious. They sang this random song at the end and did some really strange dances, it was so funny! Then went home and ate pizzaaa

Sunday I went for a walk with my Mum and step-dad because it was such nice weather and I had nothing better to do. Had a pretty nice walk through some trees and next to an old canal.

So then yesterday was our first proper day back, I'm really freaked out about how much work I'm gonna have to do this year... and how hard I'm gonna have to work to get the grades I want. Joined the choir as well.

Today we had another really boring free period, god they are the most boring thing on earth, I'm gonna do work whenever I can, well when I get some that is. Had Maths for the first time, no harder than last year... YET!
Was too hot wearing black, thin white top tomorrow I think... although I don't have any skirts to wear, grr!

Haha I love doing these rants that you totally don't want to read o anything but hehe there ya go anyway, that's my life for the past week or whatever...

petit-chou-fleur ]]> ~petit-chou-fleur http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/6348022/ http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/6348022/ Sun, 28 Aug 2005 04:36:44 PDT
Danny's (~121divided121) party was really great fun, I think we stayed there for about 10 hours or something, way longer than expected! We had a huge water fight and all got completely drenched, played swingball, played football (well sort of...), had a huge fight with balloons, and played monopoly! You can't get much better than that lol.

Yesterday me and Sarah (~Salix02) had a big photo shoot around her garden, we came up with some really cool ideas, some of which we've both posted already. It's really interesting doing collaborations...

I've started trying to write poetry in order to enter a competition at ~PoeticPath, so far so bad, it really is not going well, but hopefully I'll be able to put enough work into it to make it half decent.

Hope everyone is ok and is doing well!
petit-chou-fleur ]]> ~petit-chou-fleur http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/6325715/ http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/6325715/ Thu, 25 Aug 2005 14:26:43 PDT I was so nervous I thought I was going to spontaneously combust! But my results were excellent:
7 A*s and 2 As, one of which is being remarked because I was only a few marks off and A*!
Wo0o! I don't know anyone who was completely disappointed which was excellent, so overall a very good day!

Hope Danny's party is good tomorrow ]]> ~petit-chou-fleur http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/6269202/ http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/6269202/ Fri, 19 Aug 2005 08:49:20 PDT Mood: Singing
Listening To: The Mixed Tape - Jack's Mannequin
Reading: Charlotte Gray by Sebastian Faulks

'This is morning
That's when I spend the most time
Thinking 'bout what I've given up
This is a warning
When you start the day just to close the curtains
You're thinking 'bout what I've given up

Where are you now?
As I'm swimming through the stereo
I'm writing you a symphony of sound
Where are you now?
As I rearrange the songs again
This mix could burn a hole in anyone
But it was you I was thinking of
It was you I was thinking of

I read your letter
The one you left when you broke into my house
Retracing every step you made
And you said you meant it
And there's a piece of me in every single
Second of every single day
But if it's true then tell me how it got this way

And I can't get to you

And where are you now?

And this is my mixed tape for her
It's like I wrote every note
With my own fingers'

I have this song on repeat hehe, I'm probably annoying everyone in the house with it, but I'm addicted! Andrew rocks

Well I've done quite a lot this week because I haven't seen my friends in so long, been shopping, been bowling, played Quasar (haha we rocked), been puzzled by a strange dance mat etc etc.

Can't wait until we get back to school, being away makes me seem weird, like I can't be myself or something...hmm tis strange.

Anyway I'm going on holiday again, but only for five days so I won't be gone long After that I promise everyone that I will get pen to paper and write some poetry, it's been so long, seems like I've almost forgotten about it!

Speak to you all soon!
petit-chou-fleur ]]> ~petit-chou-fleur http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/6233402/ http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/6233402/ Mon, 15 Aug 2005 11:11:56 PDT IT'S MY ONE YEAR ANNIVERSARY

Can't believe I've been on here a year, woah...

Well I've got like 5 days before I go on holiday again, god I can't wait to be free of family holidays! But luckily this time it's only for five days and I will be back in time to get my GCSE results.

I've got a couple of photos to post and I have a poem I'm not too sure about posting yet, I think I might do some more work to it first, but I'll try my best to put it up very soon.

Got a few things planned to do this week, so no time to be bored... I still need to unpack, whoops...

Well this was a pointless journal entry, but just wanted to have one to celebreat my one year thingymajig.










~petit-chou-fleur http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/6222091/ http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/6222091/ Sun, 14 Aug 2005 04:42:55 PDT How fun eh?

Well I've done so much travelling in the last month I'm surprised I'm not dead.
I've been a shit friend, and god knows I'd hate me if I was them, and this isn't me trying to pity myself or get pity, this is the truth.
And I have so much to try and set right in five days or less I don't know what I'm gonna do.
I go on holiday too damn much so I'm never in the real world.
I can't write at the moment.
And to top things off I'm going on holiday again in a few more days.

Sorry I haven't got anything to submit on here, if I could produce anything worth showing you it would be on here, but unfortunately that hasn'yt been possible recently.

I hate this time of year, all the holidays stop me from doing what I really want to do, be with friends, that's all I want. But I'm missing Oliver's party and I've been stuck abroad for two weeks so I couldn't contact people without having to sell my arms and legs.

Phew, now that's all off my chest, hope everyone is good, and jst a note to say I've deleted some previous journal entries, certain people will know what I mean. ]]> ~petit-chou-fleur http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/6066137/ http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/6066137/ Fri, 29 Jul 2005 09:47:11 PDT Mood: Excited
Listening To: Whisper - Evanescence
Reading: The Lord Of The Rings

So I'm going on holiday tomorrow morning I have Windows Media Player on random and I've just started reading The Lord Of The Rings Hehe what could be better?!

Well this week hasn't been particularly eventful but I've kept myself occupied for most of it, which is good! Sunday I walked way too far with =SpunkieMunkie we were very dead by the end of it! Monday went to collect photos Then caught the bus into Leeds, reandomly bumped into Mark and Craig in Morley, but I didn't spot them til they'd almost walked past, hehe, I always walk around in my own little world, I must have looked spaced out when I finally spotted them! On the bus into Leeds we randomly saw a cow stood on a mound of manure... something you see everyday of course... Wednesday I wandered round a shopping centre for a while, then went swimming with Matt (=SpunkieMunkie), Danny (~121divided121), Mark and Craig, the only girl... silly Yasmin never showed up lol. Was fun anyway, didn't really do much but yeh... then played badminton, I lost I think I was having a bad day, I only narrowly lost to Craig though so that was OK, not too fussed... So yeah that's about all I've really been doing.

So as I said above, after only being back for a week from Austria I am departing again with my family this time to Brittany in France. I went to Southern Brittany last year with my Dad and the weather let us down, so hopefully this year the weather will be better! I should have some pictures to show everyone , so I'll post them when I get back in just over two week's time. I won't be on dA obviously throughout that time, unless I find an internet café, which I'm hoping I will. I won't be able to submit anything for sure anyway, not that I have been while I've been at home anyway, I'm so sorry for that, but as I said, I've not been in the creative mood for a while now, all I've written is 2 verses of a poem I really should finish...

Well, my thoughts aren't torturing me at the moment which is a change, I suppose I've found a way to stop analysing things that I've already analysed to death! I really need to just chill out this summer and stop thinking about various things that I've been thinking about for months, because they suck... Hopefully I can just relax and then see what the next school year will bring, hopefully some new people to meet as well...

I have no idea what's been going on with the dA staff but it's pretty devastating news for the community that °jark has been demoted, despite him being one of the founders! How can something like this happen?! He is one of the most loved deviants on here, at least that can't be damaged even if his staff status can. We'll just have to see how dA ends up, I don't think the atmostphere for many will be the same, but I don't think that should stop us from talking about and sharing art... I don't know what I'd do without dA, seriously.

I finally started reading the Lord Of The Rings as well, I've been meaning to read it for ages, after all the films are spectacular, and I always get annoyed when people only see films and not read the books, so I'm not going to be a hypocrite. So with packing done I've just been chilling out this afternoon, and eating Toffee Bakewell Tarts, yum yum.

So yeah, not that this was very interesting at all, but I hope you all have great a great summer (or whatever season it is where you are) and keep happy, postpone the depression as much as you can if it's imminent. Hmm that was a random statement. I'll be sure to look at all your deviations and comments as soon as I get back! Au revoir mes amis!

~petit-chou-fleur http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/5942127/ http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/5942127/ Fri, 15 Jul 2005 12:08:28 PDT Mood: Tired
Listening To: The Quiet Things That No One Ever Knows - Brand New

'So keep the blood in your head
And keep your feet on the ground
If today's the day it gets tired
Today's the day we drop out
Gave up my body and bed
All for an empty hotel
Wasting words on lower cases and capitals

I contemplate the day we wed
Your friends are boring me to death
Your veil is ruined in the rain
By then it's you I can do without
There's nothing new to talk about
And though our kids are blessed
Their parents let them shoulder all the blame'

I suppose I don't really have too much to write about really!

Monday I sorted out all my prom photos and kept looking at them over and over again lol, haha I was bored! Then me and =SpunkieMunkie randomly crashed ~duveau23's house. We ate sun lollys (haha how cool are they!) and then laughed hysterically at the acting on Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban, they really should ban those films, although they are pure comedy!

Haven't reall done much else until today really. Went bowling with a few people which was a pretty good day! Sat int he bus station waiting for a few other people to arrive, with Emily constantly going on about there being a bomb somewhere in the bus and everything! (There was a bomb found in one of the buses about a week ago so it was evacuated), I just don't want to live in a climate of fear, so I refuse to be scared abotu these things, after all no matter how paranoid you are, you still have to live your life. Played on the arcades and was narrowly beaten at Air Hockey, I was winning all along as well!! I dint play very well at bowling, got 101 and 89, pretty rubbish scores but I don't care I think I came second and third on our lane, it was fun anyway! Haha Mark in a stress because he's crap, like I said, it's unfair that he's good at most things... silly boy. Went on the dance mats after that, I'm actually alright ont hose things, except Amy made me go on a really fast one and I was totally hot and exhausted, I didn't fail though *feels patheticlaly proud*. Went to Pizza Hut and Emily was serving Laura and Matty ridiculous bowls of Ice Cream Factory, it was like a mountain, then she decided to put it in the coke... it went all disgusting, it just looked yuck! Took us about half an hour to sort out the bill, it's hard when there's 11 people, we got there in the end though then caught the bus back home, the bus I caught was absolutely packed! Gopt talking to this woman about how ridiculous it is that they run single decker buses during rush hour, stupid bus people...

So yehh, off to Flamingo Land (Theme Park) with my Dad tomoro!
Then Sunday I'm going to Austria for about a week, so I won't be on here for a while! Hope you're all having fun, talk to you soon

petit-chou-fleur ]]> ~petit-chou-fleur http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/5892299/ http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/5892299/ Sun, 10 Jul 2005 05:40:57 PDT Mood: Very happy
Listening To: Broken - Seether feat. Amy Lee
Reading: Angel's Crest by

'I wanted you to know I love the way you laugh
I wanna hold you high and steal your pain away
I keep your photograph and I know it serves me well
I wanna hold you high and steal your pain

‘Cause I’m broken when I’m lonesome
And I don’t feel right when you’re gone away

You've gone away, you don't feel me here, anymore

The worst is over now and we can breathe again
I wanna hold you high, you steal my pain away
There’s so much left to learn, and no one left to fight
I wanna hold you high and steal your pain'

Such an amazing song, and these past couple of days have been that too!

We had our prom on Friday night, that is probably one of the best nights I've ever had, it was just so great!

Before the limo came we had this major photo sessions with everyone at Emma's (~duveau23) house, parents and grandparents demanding us all to pose, it was like we were surrounded by the papparazzi!! I hate smiling so much, my mouth way like frozen in a cheesy smile! My mum didn't turn up until later so we had another major photo session.

Then the limo came and we drank our glasses of champagne and sang along loudly with the windows open, we were waving at passers by trying to look important, Sarah (~Salix02) was doing her regal wave, haha it was hilarious, this guy waved back and we all cheered, he was quite scared I think!

When we got there we just kept gathering everyone together for lots of photos, I was making everyone pose, haha, so fun. There was a professional photographer there too, so we kept having group shots, hopefully they'll be on the internet soon I've looked at all my photos millions of times already! I think we ate then, but it was at that time everyone decided to do speeches, it was going cold, so I just carried on eating!

Then the dancing began, I think I danced almost non-stop for about 3 hours, and in heels that is painful! I was surprised I never lost my voice either, I was singing at top volume for ages, but luckily it didn't decide to leave me...
It's funny at those kind of things because you have so much fun dancing to songs that usually you would hate, when Snoop Dogg came on me and Matt (=SpunkieMunkie) were imitating the guys who thought they were gangsters at live 8, they thought they were so cool...

We all rocked out to Kaiser Chiefs, Guns and Roses, Bon jovi and Green Day, maybe Kaiser Chiefs aren't as bad as I used to think... The DJ was kinda bad, he kept having gaps between songs, so everyone was sort of stood waiting for the next song to come on, or they sat down.

It was really funny watching Amy (who really fancies Mark but won't admit it) grab him at every opportunity, he kept trying to escape, it was funny when the slow songs started cuz I danced with Mark first and then Amy came and grabbed him! Hah fun times! Then I danced with Steph and we kept hitting Mark and Amy while we danced, Amy looked so annoyed. Then I thin |I danced with Danny and then Matt, except they played Dirty dancing last and me and Matt were like, hang on this isn't a slow song, so we jst kept alternating between slow dancing and normal dancing. What a great night that was.

We got the limo back, got changed and were gonna go to Matt's to drink, seen as we weren't allowed alcohol at the prom, but we were so tired we jst stayed for two hours and went back, cuz Sarah (~Salix02), Yas (~jazzman88) and Emma (~duveau23) were all staying at mine. Everyone was so shattered, I couldn't get to sleep for ages though cuz the whole night kept going round and round in my head, because sooo much happened!

Yesterday I don't think we got ready til like 1, we watched Mean Girls, that film is hilarious! 'If you touch each other you will get Clamydia (can't remember how you spell it), K-L...' Such fun. Emma had to go but she came back and then Yas went, and Sarah's parents came but ended up staying until midnight! So me and Sarah were looking at prom photos again and having a hilarious conversation with Amy, her name was 'Marks ace' yet she kept telling us that she didn't fancy him, we were in fits of laughter!

Well I could talk... ]]> ~petit-chou-fleur http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/5829944/ http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/5829944/ Sun, 03 Jul 2005 14:46:54 PDT Mood: OK
Listening To: Me and the Moon - Something Corporate

'reasons like seasons
they constantly change
and the seasons of last year
like reasons have floated away

away with these nightmares
away with suburbia
shake down away
you marry a role and
you give up your soul til you break down'

Yay for songs about women killing their husbands, lol! Haha, tis a great song, I remember December last year I just used to have this on repeat for ages! Steph has no idea how great she is for introducing me to them lol.

I forgot to mention in my last entry, I won the Darkness Competition at I was so amazed!! Poeple actually voted for me, so this is a big thank you to those of you who did!! It was tough competition, so I'm amazed that I won!

Well, since my last entry, things have got a lot better, much of it thanks to a lot of the great advice some people have been giving me, thank you you know who you are

Except for today I've been doing quite a lot! On Friday I went to the cinema with =SpunkieMunkie and ~121divided121 to see War Of The Worlds! It was an absolutely fantastic film, a bit scary for a 12A rating I thought - poor kids, they'll be scared to death!! Damn people who rate things accord to how many tickets they want to sell I don't understand why people have given it bad reviews, the special effects are awesome, and the acting is great too! We sat in the bus station waiting for the bus for three quarters of an hour, talking about random crap, we leapt between topics, god knows how!!

Saturday I spent a total of about 12 hours in Leeds!! We went to see Live8 on a massive screen in Millenium Square, but it didn't start until one, so me and =SpunkieMunkie just wandered around Leeds, god it was humid! Haha I introduced him to the giant Waterstones (god I love that shop!) lol, hehe, I'm sad. Although I haven't bought books in a while, I shoudl be proud of myself I suppose. I've still got like 15 books left to read which I bought during my three months of book-buy-bingeing, haha! Anyway...
Well we bought food, (why do I never eat breakfast?!?!) and met ~Salix02 and went to Millenium Square. The crowd was so dull for the first few hours, until everyone started gettin drunk and then there were lots of freaky people... Haha we had fun tkaing the mick out of the woman with the giant nose, who was practically stripping for her boyfriend in front of everyone... god she was scary... the guy was jst stood there too... There was also this crazy woman who was wlaking around spilling beer everywhere! These people decided to chuck water about, it went right in my face, argh! Good thing it was a hot night! I got so sunburnt... over the previous sunburn... why do I always forget the sun cream?! Lol
Anyway I don't know how many of you watched it, but it was an amazing atmosphere with everyone singing along, Sweet Dreams by Annie Lennox was great! Madonna, Scissor Sisters, Robbie Williams, Bon Jovi and many others all performed fantastically too!! We stayed until like quarter to 11, not til the finish unfortunately, we were shattered! Was a great night.

Then today I did practically nothing! I watched the Wimbledon men's final, was pointless really, the writing was on the wall right from the start... poor Roddick, he tried his best but Federer is too bloody good! He cried when he won, bless him. Me and my mum were sat taking the mick out of Roddick even though we were supporting him, he does sweat a lot though...it's quite disgusting, yeuch.

Well this next week we've got the prom coming up... so I need to tan my legs before then... not likely to happen! Anyhow I shall leave you now and say... 'Sweet dreams are made of these... some of them want to abuse you...'

petit-chou-fleur ]]> ~petit-chou-fleur http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/5802767/ http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/5802767/ Thu, 30 Jun 2005 14:32:57 PDT Mood: Depressed
Listening To: L'Via L'Viaquez - The Mars Volta
Reading: If Nobody Speaks Of Remarkable Things by Jon McGregor

'When all the worms come
Crawlin out of your head
Telling you
Don’t you be afraid
When all the worms come
Crawlin out of your head
Telling you
Don’t you be afraid

Blackmailed she fell off every mountain
The ones they tightly wrapped in tape
In her eraser sang the guilty
As it made the best mistakes
Shark kites got tangled in the moleskin
Urgent plea of escape
A mouth to mouth on the chalkboard
Written in fingernail distaste
And with every body that I find
And with every claymore that they mine
I won’t forget who I’m looking for
Oh mother help me I’m looking for'

Well the other day I went into Leeds with =SpunkieMunkie and sorry if you watch him as well but tough I'm writing about it here too We took loads of photos around Leeds, but I can't post my photos until I get some new batteries for my camera, grr. Haha we looked like tourists!

Did a day of work experience at an advertising company, it taught me that I never wanna leave school, and I'd be crap at working anyway... Then had the Summer Concert today, I always feel degraded at stuff like that, because all my friends perform such amazing things, and I'm just crap. Oh well... back to depression

Everyday is the same, because everyday I'm the same. No matter how much I try to stand in my own skin and not care about being judged, the more I seem to feel my confidence slip away. Sorry, I don't mean to be self-indulgent yet again, but it's true, every shred of confidence I ever eran myself, always disappears right from where it came. Every second of every day I feel paranoid that I'm being judged, that I'm not doing the right thing, I feel a stranger in my own skin. I'd rather be a fly on the wall most of the time. No matter how hard I try to make myself feel good about how I present myself, the more I lag behind.

I don't even feel comfortable talking to anyone, because my voice goes all weird, and I just feel stupid. It's like I want to get away from everything but I want to stay too. I don't want to be me, I don't care if with a lot of people it's just a front, because I don't even have the confidence to put on a front. I just can't not care, no matter how hard I try, and I spend so much energy trying. I can never handle situations properly, the only confidence I have is in things like school work and exam grades, but I don't care about all that half as much as I care about being able to talk to people, and having something to say.

I'll go crawl into my corner and die...
Sorry if this looks like attention seeking, because it's not, and I am not that kind of person, I've only written it here, because it's the only place I can get rid of some of the evil things on my mind...

petit-chou-fleur ]]> ~petit-chou-fleur http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/5772858/ http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/5772858/ Mon, 27 Jun 2005 14:57:08 PDT Mood: Generally OK
Listening To: Strange And Beautiful (I'll Put A Spell On You - Aqualung
Reading: If Nobody Speaks Of Remarkable Things by Jon McGregor

'I've been watching your world from afar,
I've been trying to be where you are,
And I've been secretly falling apart,
I'll see.
To me, you're strange and you're beautiful,
You'd be so perfect with me but you just can't see,
You turn every head but you don't see me.

I'll put a spell on you,
You'll fall asleep and I'll put a spell on you.
And when I wake you,
I'll be the first thing you see, lyricstop
And you'll realise that you love me.'

So I got to the root of the problem that was making me feel depressed the other day, well one of the contributors anyway, and I suppose I feel better for having realised, at least it means I won't dwell on it so much It's always like that with moods, you feel a bit down and then you start to think about all the other things that aren't perfect in your life, all the other little inadequacies, misfortunes and branches of your life you thought you had forgotten. So yeah, I feel much better...

So now onto what I've been doing these past few days, lol.

On Friday I was in hospital for a bit, just the outpatient ward, I used to have this damn annoying mole underneath my chin that caught on everything so I had that removed, finally, mind you it's weird that it's gone, I've had it all my life! I'm so squeamish, I hate injections, especially when they're in my neck - it seemed like it was gonna go on forever, I'm sure it took her like two minutes to put the local anasthetic in I'm such a wimp, with anything like that I always go into shock, and my vision looks like a snowstorm on a tv screen, I lose my balance and spacial awareness - basically feel like I'm gonna faint! I had it before when I had my ears pierced, I don't know what it is, it must just be a psychological reaction I get to stuff like that, I'm not too sure! So yeh, this lovely woman came over and asked if I wanted a drink, so my stepdad went with ehr to get a drink, I felt just awful. I suppose it reminded me that there are good people in this world who will do anything to help even strangers!

Well, on Saturday I was at my Dad's house, he lives practically the other end of the country and I go there every two weeks just about. So anyway they needed to go into town to pick up holiday tickets and buy stuff for lunch the next day so I decided I'd rather sit in the car and listen to music, always a good choice I think you'll agree!! Me and my sister were putting totally contrasting music on full blast at the same time, made for an interesting cocktail - for example Anastacia and Mars Volta!! Haha, my sister can be alright sometimes, she's not all bad! So yeah Saturday was music day!

Sunday we hired a boat on the Great Ouse near his house. It was so fun, it was quite a grey day at first but it didn't rain which is always a plus with English weather! I took absolutely loads of picture, about 80 I think it was!! I've already posted 4 on here, I don't think I'll post any more though. It was so fun steering the boat, shame there wasn't a turbo gear, it was too damn slow for my liking! Haha I feasted on mini flapjacks all day, they were so yummy!!

So today I went and leapt on Emma (~duveau23) and we went for a long walk, we were gonna walk like 10 miles but she was wearing flip-flops so we didn't in the end, we sat on a big hill for a while though and chatted about laods of different stuff. It looked like the end of the world if you looked up the hil, like we were near the sea or something (even though we're nowhere near) haha, jst what we thought. Anyway, then we got thirsty cos it was sooo hot, so we went back to hers and sat leisurely in the garden chatting about the usual rubbish and eating ice-pops, aaah how cool is being kid-like?! Haha we even invented a new sport to play, Footis, basically playing tennis but with a footbal instead of a tennis ball, haha makes for excellent fun!

I haven't the slightest clue why I'm telling you all this, but I suppose it's fun to offload stuff! Hmm, things seem like they are getting better all the time and hopefully I should be able to sort out loads of things to do next week, I always have days where I'm at a loose end, which kind of bugs me, like tomorrow, would be a day to teach myself guitar, but I can't tune the damn thing, grr! The... ]]> ~petit-chou-fleur http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/5724656/ http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/5724656/ Wed, 22 Jun 2005 15:18:08 PDT Mood: Pensive
Listening To: Don't Speak - No Doubt
Reading: Cloud Atlas by David Mitchell


'Our memories
They can be
Inviting, but
somewhere altogether
mighty frightening

Don't speak
Don't tell me cuz it hurts

I really feel
That I'm losing
My best friend
I can't believe
this could be
the end

it looks as though
you're letting go
and if it's real
well i don't want
to know'

I want to just lie down, and drift to sleep with this song on repeat, it just sums up my mood at the moment, absolutely, and completely.

Everything's changing, constantly, uncontrollably, strangely, and even though everything is just slight things I've noticed, it keeps draggin me back to how things were in the past, and everything I've been through in the past year and before that too. It's certainly been a whirlwind, but the winds seem to have lost power now and instead, silent zephyrs are stealing away familiar parts of my life I thought would never leave.

I'm in a really odd mood, I feel depressed for the first time in a while, but I'm not sure exactly why. I think I'm scared for how things may change in the near future, when we go back to school in sixth form etc, because in year 11 everything has seemed stable and comfortable and I can feel it altering already. It seems as though I thought I was building up the amount of people I knew and talked to, but everything seems to have fallen apart again. And it all comes back to my own insecurities, why the hell do I have to be so fucking shy?!?! I hate myself for it, but I'm crap at starting conversations, I'm crap at integrating myself into conversations, and I hate that I never feel secure in myself. I can't stand alone at a party, and just find people to talk to, I end up looking like some loner girl, and I fucking hate it!!! I don't usually swear but I've lived with this shyness my whole life, and no matter how hard I try to overcome it, it just won't leave me alone. What's worse is that all my friends are outgoing, they'll be able to integrate themselves and I just feel lonely.

I have all these mounting insecurities, they are constantly accumulating, I try my hardest to erase them but they keep re-appearing, I'm lost and stuck on an island, with no boat to sail away from it on. I keep writing reams of poetry, but none of it gets out what I am truly feeling, none of it gets to the root of why I feel like this. There is so much I could write here, that I need to get out, but it's my own stupid head that leaves these things whizzing constantly around, and there is no one I feel comfortable telling it to, even the people I thought I could pour my soul out to.

And even as I write this I feel stupid because I'm on the verge of tears, and I feel as though my world is crashing down around me. I don't even know why this has happened, and even as I think, I just keep pretending I'm ok, because I have nothing to be upset about really. Why do things that happened so long ago keep coming back to me, and make me dwell on them when I don't want them to - I dealt with them ages ago!

Well I thought this would help, and it hasn't helped very much at all, I suppose it's because I'm rambling and I don't feel comfortable writing any more about my thoughts. Thank you to anyone who read this, it means a lot

And now I'm looking at photographs on an old friend's site, a friend who I was so so close to, and now never speak to anymore, and it hurts me so much to look at all the people in those photos I used to know, all the people I still remember bit who forgot me long ago. It hurts me so much to look at them, because I remember things so vividly but I was just one person, easy to forget. One person in particular I look at and remember how close we were, I remember how we suppported each other when we were going through hard times and when I was helping her fight peer pressure. She was such an amazing person, and I am almost certainly never going to see or speak to her ever again, it hurts me more than I can say. And at this moment, I wonder if things turned out for the better...

petit-chou-fleur ]]> ~petit-chou-fleur http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/5712044/ http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/5712044/ Tue, 21 Jun 2005 14:37:17 PDT Mood: Happy
Listening To: Sunday Morning - No Doubt

'Sappy pathetic little me
That was the girl I used to be
You had me on my knees
I'd trade you places any day
I'd never thought you could be that way
But you looked like me on Sunday

You came in with the breeze
On Sunday Morning
You sure have changed since yesterday
Without any warning

You're trying my shoes on for a change
They look so good but fit so strange
Out of fashion so I can complain'

Haha thought I'd only post a section of lyrics this time seen as its pointless anyway

Well I am officially free now!! I have finished all my exams, and they all went reasonably well which is good anyway! Had History today and Paper 2 is evil!! I didn't do in the last bit enough revision but hey it went alright, after about 15 minutes in an exam I can't be bothered though, especially in the heat Well I have to go into school to get my form signed for all my books and get my Progress File but apart from that I don't have to go in, well there is String Group but who even cares lol... haven't been since Christmas...oops! Dum de dum...

Anyway I feel inspire dot be arty, but lack the ability to think of something to do, I've tried drawing but I'm too shit to do anything half-decent. Have Photoshop now so I might muck around and see what I can come up with seen as I haven't the slightest clue how to work it! You never now!

Confirmed work experience for next week, don't know how long for it will be but its something to put on my CV and help me find out what I want to do as a future career. It's at a Marketing company in Leeds and I get to look at the kind of work all the copyrighters and creative people do so I'm looking forward to it

Hopefully I'll be able to find lots to do, seems hopeful if I organise my social calendar properly! Think I'm going up to the Yorkshire Dales this weekend with my Dad, it better still be sunny! He wanted to go camping but I've decided I want to sleep in a bed, and I don't like all the scary noises in the night So yeah...

I really want to be able to write poetry, I've written loads recently but it's all a load of crap, grrr! I think I need to be hit over the head, see if it brings back any of my creative abilities because they all seem to have left, hope it's only temporary, otherwise I'm gonna fail A Level English...

Well, only like 2 months to wait for results, I want them now That's what I hate about externally examined things you have to wait yonks for the results!

So yeah, that's what's been happening in my incredibly boring life - if you've even read it, which I doubt... hehe.

UPDATE
Well I've just written three poems in about 10 minutes, I've only posted one though, I had something I just had to get out, and it's helped a bit to write it down in poems! I think it'll be good to have a while to myself now I don't have any commitments, I have a lot going on in my head... Anyways that's all I had to add!

petit-chou-fleur ]]> ~petit-chou-fleur http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/5673473/ http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/5673473/ Fri, 17 Jun 2005 04:44:52 PDT Mood: Strange
Listening To: These Are The Days Of Our Lives - Queen
Reading: Therapy - Jonathon Kellerman

'Sometimes I get to feelin'
I was back in the old days - long ago
When we were kids when we were young
Thing seemed so perfect - you know
The days were endless we were crazy we were young
The sun was always shinin' - we just lived for fun
Sometimes it seems like lately - I just don't know
The rest of my life's been just a show

Those were the days of our lives
The bad things in life were so few
Those days are all gone now but one thing is true
When I look and I find I still love you

You can't turn back the clock you can't turn back the tide
Ain't that a shame
I'd like to go back one time on a roller coaster ride
When life was just a game
No use in sitting and thinkin' on what you did
When you can lay back and enjoy it through your kids
Sometimes it seems like lately - I just don't know
Better sit back and go with the flow

Cos these are the days of our lives
They've flown in the swiftness of time
These days are all gone now but some things remain
When I look and I find no change

Those were the days of our lives - yeah
The bad things in life were so few
Those days are all gone now but one thing's still true
When I look and I find
I still love you

I still love you'

That song is so beautiful, it makes me want to cry! I was listening to it last night when I couldn't sleep.

Yesterday was a really bizarre day, had my Science exam, which went well, I hope althought I didn't do enough revision for it really! Then I came home, and spent the whole day procrastinating, I couldn't be bothered to vacuum the house! So I was on here for like 4 hours, I swear my eyes are gonna die very soon!! I felt really restless all day, as if there was something I needed to get out, but I just couldn't, the right words wouldn't go together in poetry so I was stuck really. So I drew morbid sketches (see preview image of Hang Me Up, Rip Me Dry), I suppose that helped a bit. I listened to this song over and over, it's so so sad that this was one of the last songs Freddie Mercury performed before he died, yet his singing is still just as perfect as ever!

Well I've posted so many things on here recently, lots of fractals and poetry, I moved quite a few things from scraps too. Anyway I hope you like them, things don't seem to be as polished recently though - the right words just won't come. Hmm, not sure what sort of a mood I'm in kind of a mixture of lonely/tired/pensive that's why I put strange ^.

Well there's a few things to look forward to but when I finish exams, things look bleak for how I'm gonna fill my time, anyways! Hope everyone's ok!

petit-chou-fleur ]]> ~petit-chou-fleur http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/5635037/ http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/5635037/ Mon, 13 Jun 2005 09:28:35 PDT Mood: Happy
Listening To: Best Of You - Foo Fighters
Reading: Therapy by Jonathon Kellerman

'I've got another confession to make
I'm your fool
Everyone's got their chains to break
Holdin' you

Were you born to resist or be abused?
Is someone getting the best, the best, the best, the best of you?

Are you gone and onto someone new?
I needed somewhere to hang my head
Without your noose
You gave me something that I didn't have
But had no use
I was too weak to give in
Too strong to lose
My heart is under arrest again
But I break loose
My head is giving me life or death
But I can't choose
I swear I'll never give in
I refuse

Has someone taken your faith?
Its real, the pain you feel
You trust, you must
Confess

Has someone taken your faith?
Its real, the pain you feel
The life, the love
You die to heal
The hope that starts
The broken hearts
You trust, you must
Confess

I've got another confession my friend
I'm no fool
I'm getting tired of starting again
Somewhere new

Were you born to resist or be abused?
I swear I'll never give in
I refuse'

Hehe thought I'd re-create the headings you get on subscribers

Such a hectic past week!! I have had so many exams and done so many things!
I got through all of my 7 exams pretty well, at least I hope so

On Friday I went to a friend's friend's 18th birthday party, if that makes sense... Had fun, drank lots - however was still sober was funny being around tipsy/drunk friends, slightly dangerous too being paraded down the middle of the road at half 11 - good job there was no traffic...
My mum thought I was drunk, honestly she doesn't know the difference betwen when I'm drunk and when I'm not, because when I am she never ever notices! Silly parents...

On Saturday went to visit grand-parents went out to Brdlington which was alright, however I felt a bit ill so I missed out on eating dough-nuts Intended to get some revision done, but really lacked the motivation...

Came home on Sunday and went to a friend's party! Was so fun on the bouncy castle, then we stayed on even when it started raining, was so fun, but I was soaked! Luckily I came in when it started absolutely pouring it down, some silly people didn't and had to borrow some clothes - was so fun to laugh at them, the fools! We played Bop-It which I can safely say I win for being the most utterly and completely hopeless person at it ever in the history of Bop-It-ness, I suck so badly! Good source of comedy though When I got home I cooked tea, so I ate at like 10 haha, so much for not eating before you go to bed

The today I did a Geography paper, realised there is a whole third of the paper I know very little about so looks like tomorrow is going to be completely solidly full of Science and Geography revision! Who even cares about Economic Geography anyway... Only three exams this week, however they're Maths, Geography and Science so that isn't really and incredible relief, then there's still two more the week after that! God I can't wait til it's all over and I can chill out (how many times have I said that ah well it's what I'm looking forward to). So this week looks like about 4 days of revision and 2 days of exams, oh the joy and anticipation...

I can almost play the whole of the Moonlight Sonata by Beethoven wo0o however it's only slow and it really doesn't all flow yet, but what do you expect from a beginner piano player trying to sight-read a grade 4 piece, I feel utterly proud hehe... ]]> ~petit-chou-fleur http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/5587753/ http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/5587753/ Wed, 08 Jun 2005 09:46:42 PDT Just as he hit
The ground
They lowered a tow that
Stuck in his neck to the gills
Fragments of sobriquets
riddle me this
three half eaten corneas
who hit the aureole
Stalk the ground

You should have seen
The curse that flew right by you
Page of concrete
Stained walks crutch in hobbled sway
Auto-da-fé
A capillary hint of red
Only this manupod
Crescent in shape has escaped

The house half the way
Fell empty with teeth
That split both his lips
Mark these words
One day this chalk outline will circle this city
Was he robbed of the asphalt that cushioned his face
A room colored charlatan
Hid in a safe
Stalk the ground

Pull the pins
Save your grace
Mark these words
On his grave

Everyone knows the last toes are
Always the coldest to go

Hmm I never seem to listen to anything else other than Something Corporate and The Mars Volta these days, oh well they rock

Had English Language exam this morning, I can't help but feel I jinx myself when I say it was easy but it really was! I love English Language exams, because I am the Queen of blabbering and when I do that in English exams I get a good grade, what could be better?! So thankfully that didn't lower my confidence further from yesterday's Maths ordeal.

Wandered round school for a bit afterwards getting my sheet signed and looking for ~Salix02 couldn't find her anywhere!! So I just went home, in the gorgeous heat we've suddenly got. It's so beautiful at the moment with cloudless skies and cool breezes intercepting the hot sun. I did the smallest amount of revision and got bored so instead resorted to writing poetry, and I'm so pleased I finally got something written! Not only does it mean I can enter the contest at ~PoeticPath but it means that now I know I still have the capability, and don't get myself frustrated that I've lost it!

Well I sat in the sun for a bit then got too hot so went inside (England, too hot?! am I insane?!). I spend far too much time on this computer... I really should go get myself immersed in History...

I got 50 watchers Thanks everyone who watches me, I really appreciate it, you all rock! I'm nearing 2,000 pageviews as well so thanks for that as well!

Anyhow two exams tomorrow so I better get studying... Good luck to everyone else who's doing exams at the moment!

petit-chou-fleur ]]> ~petit-chou-fleur http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/5579217/ http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/5579217/ Tue, 07 Jun 2005 11:43:01 PDT I’ve always wanted
To eat glass with you again
But I never knew how
How to talk without
Walls dropping on the eve
The nest they made couldn’t break you
Along the fallen
Scowled a fence of beaks
But the temple is scathing
Through your veins
They were scaling
Through an ice pick of abcess rekoning
And when Miranda sang
Everyone turned away
Used to the noose they obey
And whoever said that they would scatter
Separating the mother from child
She can bat a broken eyelid

Raining maggots from it’s sty
And with the traces that she leaves
She will skin you out alive
All the children go grinding their jaws
The sweet smell of their toothless canals
And the damn she will break, make an ocean from this lake
As they siphon off all of our blood
And when Miranda sang
Everyone turned away
Used to the noose the obey

Couldn't fit song name in Miranda, That Ghost Just Isn't Holy Anymore - The Mars Volta

Today's been a pretty evil day as far as days go. Had one Maths exam, it was hell! I thought I was quite good at maths...until today. I'm sure the examiners decided to watch us squirm with near impossible questions we havent even learnt how to answer properly! I felt really tired and sick, but I'm sure that's partially to do with the lighting in the Woollin Hall, it's so orange!! I'm just praying they alter the grade boundaries because it was so hard! However as long as I get a good grade I suppose I have nothing to complain about...

Then to make things worse I get halfway across the road and this car turns in to the road and the woman shouts at me that 'if she'd have been lucky she'd have run me over' I don't understand why she thinks I was the one in the wrong, I had already started crossing the road when she turned in, I couldn't exactly know that from the road I couldn't even see down the way I was walking there was going to be a car turn down. God, people do my head in sometimes!!

Then I get home and it's lovely History revision! However History revision is going pretty well I know nearly all of it and I've got half a day tomorrow to go over everything and do some past papers. So hopefully my History exam on Thursday will go smoothly...

One good thing today, I got to sleep in because my exam wasn't until the afternoon, however I dreamt I got disqualified from my exam, which wasn't such a good thing... Then had hours to waste this morning reading and listening to music. Hopefully our English paper will have some good questions on it, I don't want my confidence to be knocked in English otherwise I'll lose hope completely...

I will be so glad when exams are over, so so so glad! I want to make the effort to write some poetry but I have no time and energy left from all the exams and revision I've been doing, bear with me and in a week or so I may be able to post something

petit-chou-fleur ]]> ~petit-chou-fleur http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/5552690/ http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/5552690/ Sat, 04 Jun 2005 15:08:14 PDT Once again listening to music, and it's the same band once again... although Mars Volta have had a look in recently!

I was utterly fed up yesterday afternoon, I thought I'd walk down a bit later to some friends' house, to clear my head and think a bit - while breathing 'fresh' air. But thanks to English weather it poured it down and the wind was a gale so I did more trying to keep dry but then again stop the umbrella going inside out... so I was thoroughly pissed off when I arrived, a mile walk later...

Today was better though, went to the cinema to with =SpunkieMunkie and ~duveau23 to see the League Of Gentlemen's Apocalyse, t'was rather funny, depends on whether you like the TV series though . Bought books and CDs too, which is always fun! But I haven't reverted to my book-buying binge I just had a voucher to spend

So tomorrow I will hopefully motivate myself sufficiently to soak up knowledge for my exams next week, I am really dreading History, there's so much to learn! I feel fairly confident, but I'll prepare as much as I can!

I will try and overcome my writer's block fairly soon, because it's really bugging me, I really want to write something to be proud of... Until then I'll post a couple more fractals and maybe some poetry to scraps that I don't think is worthy enough of being a deviation.

Well I probably won't be on much in the next week due to having seven exams this coming week, which is really annoying because I won't get ot enjoy my subscription while it lasts, but hey maybe I might splash out one day and buy one anyway, but that'll be when I have the money to afford that kind of thing.

Hmm I'm babbling I hope everyone is good At the moment I'm fine, looking to the future of parties that will follow exams, god I can't wait... ok I'll finally leave you now! ]]> ~petit-chou-fleur http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/5531433/ http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/5531433/ Thu, 02 Jun 2005 11:50:07 PDT So why do you leave these stories unfinished,
my Cheshire cat doorstop with tears in her eyes?
Why do you look when you've already found me?
What did you find that could leave you walking by?

These nights I get high just from breathing.
When I lie here with you I'm sure that I'm real,
like that firework over the freeway.
I could stay here all day but that's not how you feel.

So why do you leave these questions unanswered?
The circus awaits and you're already gone.
And what did I do that you can't seem to want me?
Why do we lie here and whisper goodbyes?
Where can I go that your pictures won't haunt me?
What makes it so easy for you to be walking by?

Not too much been going on really, but I got a free subscription and then put it on Beta Mode so I just had to post a journal, hehe

I've been ever so slightly addicted to Leaving Through The Window by Something Coroprate, that is a rockin album, heh Shame very few people I know are into them really... but I love it!

Went shopping on Tuesday and actually bought stuff for a change, which is unlike me, I usually hate shopping! I had to buy another book though, shame I can't resist a half-price book - God I'm so sad! We ate lunch at Tiger Tiger, cheap food but lovely! There was an evil waiter who kept talkin to us like we were morons, grr, nasty man...

I forced myself to revise today, and I did about three quarters of an hour, there's not enough of it to fill a whole day like some people do! I suppose it's not so bad once you get into it, and I like writing with coloured pens, it look pwetty - hehe, so sad I know

Slept a lot of the day, for some reason I'm really tired, so I put Mars Volta on and somehow slept despite having it at usual high volume! Read for a bit... and yeh that's about all.

Hopefully I'll find something to do at the weekend, it's getting a bit boring occupying myself, it's only good once in a while. The weather's a bit freaky at the moment, its grey then sunny, grey then sunny etc etc...

I've got a poem I want to get up here soon - inspired by the last Desperate Housewives, that show is the best on tv, it rocks!! I've got another one I started ages ago too, but I'm not sure if I can be bothered to do much to it, but anyway - there's that to look forward too (if you like my poetry that is ) heaven knows why...

Anyway food is ready

petit-chou-fleur ]]> ~petit-chou-fleur http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/5500052/ http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/5500052/ Mon, 30 May 2005 07:50:05 PDT
'I can't imagine all the people that you know
And the places that you go
When the lights are turned down low
And I don't understand
All the things you've seen
But I'm slipping in between
You and your big... dreams
it's always you and my big dreams

And you tell me
That it's over
But i can't stand here in a patch of four leaf clover
And your restless
And I'm naked
You've got to get out
You can't stand to see me shaking
no, could you let me go

and you don't want to be here in the future
So you say
the present's just a pleasant
Interruption to the past
And you don't want to look much closer
'Cause you're afraid to find out all the hope
That you had sent into the sky by now had... crashed
and it did because of me

And then you bring me home
Afraid to find out that you're alone, no
And I'm sleeping in your living room
But we don't have much room
To live

And I had dreams that i would learn to play guitar
Maybe cross the country
Become a rockstar
And there was hope in me
That I could take you there
But dammit you're so young
But I don't think I care
and if I hurt you then i'm sorry
It's just this guilt has got the best of me

And then you bring me home
'Cause we both know what its like to be alone, no
And I'm dreaming in your living room
But we don't have much room
To live

Konstantine came walking down the stairs
Doesn't she look good
Standing in her underwear?
And i've been thinking, and i've thinking, no
But she's been drinking
And it doesn't get me anywhere

My Konstantine came walking down the stairs
And all that I could do
Was touch her long blond hair
And I was thinking, what I was thining ya know
we've been drinking and it doesn't get me anywhere

This is because I can spell konfusion with a K
It's hard to like it
It's to dying in anothers arms
and why i had to try it
It's to jimmy eat world
and those nights in my car
But this time i'm alone, and i don't see those stars
I'm not your star?
Isn't that what you said
what you thought this song meant
you thought this song meant

And if this is what it takes
just to lie in my mistakes
and live with what I did to you
And all the things i put you through
I always catch the clock it's 11:11
And now you want to talk
it's not hard to dream
You'll always be my Konstantine

They'll never hurt you like I do
No, They'll never hurt you like I do
No, No, No, No, No, No, No, No, No

This is to a girl who got into my head
with all these pretty things she did
Hey Baby, You know that you keep me up in bed
It's to a girl who got into my head
with all the fucked up things I did
Hey maybe baby, you could keep me up in bed
My Konstantine

Spin around me like a dream
We played out on this movie screen
And I said,
Did you know I miss you

God, I miss you

And then you bring me home
And we'll go to sleep but this time not alone, no no,
And you'll kiss me in your living room, oh
And you see, no, that i've been missing in my Living room
Cause this is what i miss, what i miss
We don't have much room
I said, does anybody need that room?
Because we all need a little more room
To live

My Konstantine'

--

I thought I'd post some lyrics of Something Corporate, partly because I love this song, but partly because = athenaRules asked me too! Could have posted every single song...but what's the point in bombarding people with pointless lyrics, when you can just listen to the songs!
Seems sort of empty posting just the lyrics, i wish you could put background music on your page for other people to listen to, because it's the music that makes this song, the piano is such a beautiful instrument!

I finally started revising today! Oh the joys of Rock Formations and Electromagnetic Radiation... thank god I'm dropping Geography and Science next year!
Music seems to be the main feature in everything at the moment, sometimes I go for a week without listening to any music but then times like these I feel compelled to a lot of the time! Hehe I've been teaching myself to play 'Moonlight Sonata' on the piano, which is a grade 4 piece and I've never even had proper lessons, so I'm quite proud of myself http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/5485612/ Sat, 28 May 2005 13:14:10 PDT marface

Total volume
I currently have about 3GB of music on my pc
I currently have about 6 MP3 CDs
I currently have about 25 CDs
I currently have about 0 Vinyls

Last CD I bought
North - Something Corporate (ages since I bought a CD)

Song playing right now
Cavanaugh Park - Something Corporate

5 Songs I listen to a lot or that mean a lot to me
Space Dye Vest - Dream Theater
Televators - The Mars Volta
Me And The Moon - Something Corporate
Don't Stop Me Now - Queen
Change Of Seasons - Dream Theater
(I can't narrow the list down to five properly!!)

5 People I'm passing the baton to (hmm, thinks who reads her journals...)
~andytopia
~cecilblueberry
~justpolly
=brokenboulevard
~Salix02

Hehe, I listened to music for about 5 hours today I think I'm addicted to Something Corporate, save me now But alas the mp3 player has run out of battery, what am I gonna do?!?!

petit-chou-fleur ]]> ~petit-chou-fleur http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/5477851/ http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/5477851/ Fri, 27 May 2005 14:19:14 PDT It's like the ocnversation I was having with ~andytopia yesterday, who needs drugs when you have music?!
I seem to be going through a phase of getting addicted to a different band every couple of days...for three days it was The Mars Volta, and now it's Something Corporate. I downloaded every one of their songs yesterday, because I only have one of their albums, and I found some of the greatest songs! They have such great piano parts on their songs, and they're generally great.
Some people pour their heart and soul into music, I wish I had such talent to do that and I admire it in so many other people. So yeh...basically music is a drug... it stimulates so many emotions and memories, I was looking out the car window on my way to my Dad's earlier and watching all the trees and the world pass by, and listening to Konstantine by Something Corporate, how I love that song lol!
A song for every mood...Anyone have any favourite songs?

Had fun today, did some revision...some maths which I don't even need to revise and some science but it's so boring! So I gave up and baked cakes with my friend instead, then we ate them all hehe. Now listening to more music! Yay

petit-chou-fleur ]]> ~petit-chou-fleur http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/5427985/ http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/5427985/ Sun, 22 May 2005 09:26:01 PDT
Why do some people, constantly exploit things and take them for granted, so much so that they continue in their self-obsessed greed while depriving others of privileges.
What triggered this isn't exactly particularly bad or anything but I find it so annoying that what luxuries we have in our house are just explited by my step-brother! We buy expensive cheesecake - he eats it all! I buy nice shampoo - he uses it all! It really gets on my nerves, what is the point in scoffing food you like, when you eat it so fast you don't get time to savour its taste?! Or stealing other people's sweets because they didn't know they were their's anyway. He just really pisses me off with that, what is the point?! Yes there are times when we have fun chats and that, but it pisses me off how he thinks he is far superior to me because of a two year age gap, apparently intelligence wise I am far inferior - and I know for a fact I am not! Sweeping generalisations constantly about people - and it usually includes me, and the thing that's most anonying I'm so shocked by what he's said to fight back and make myself heard!
Anyway that's my rant for today, thank god he's goin to uni next year...

petit-chou-fleur ]]> ~petit-chou-fleur http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/5409328/ http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/5409328/ Fri, 20 May 2005 06:30:00 PDT
So study leave has started wo0o yeh right... These past few days I can safely say have been some of the worst for a while. Study leave was a novelty in year 10 and for mocks because there was very little gap between exams and so what gap there was you spent occupying yourself or having fun. I've had one 40 minute exam so far, and I've run out of stuff to do - and believe me I do not get bored easily at all, it takes a lot for me to get to that stage.
Yeh, I should be studying all the time, but I know that it doesn't take me a week to revise music and english lit which I have next week, so why bother when I can do it a few days prior to the exams?!
I went out yesterday for a bit and got my prom dress, which is very nice, but not much of a consolation prize for the rest of the crap.
I feel so isolated, I'm on a cycle of, read - listen to music - go on the computer - eat - watch tv - sleep - it's so god damn boring even after only 4 days of it!! How can anyone not work and stay at home all day:
1. It send you stir crazy.
2. There's nothing stimulating to do.
3. What once was a novelty now becomes a chore.
4. You'd rather be out anywhere but stuck at home, in the rut of the same old rigmarole.

If I ever have kids no way am I being a housewife, I'll be the one who goes out and works, because I like working, yeh I moan and groan doesn't everyone moan about school and that. But to be honest I love going to school, every minute isn't filled with elation of course but in comparison I'd rather no one had study leave and we could all revise together and have fun while doing it, because I'm boxed in, with no one to talk to, no one to randomly go out somewhere with, and everyone else is doing their own thing...

I went for a random walk earlier, to see if it made me feel better, but I came back to exhausted to even take my jacket off, my head is banging and my eyes feel incurably sore. I'm not even tired, I had god knows how much sleep last night!
I tried to do a revision plan but it failed once again, I know I don't need one it's all in my head, I'm just scared I'll be disappointed with my results and regret not preparing more substantially.
Anyway I'm ranting on...

I've almost finished a vector I started yesterday, I'll get it up as soon as I can be bothered to tidy it up a bit. I started trying to paint yesterday, but once again resigned myself the reality that I can't do art, and never will be able to do art, no matter how much I try to deny it, I'll just have to stick with writing poetry not that there's anything wrong with that, I love poetry! I just feel like some of my recent work has been basically 'rubbish' and it's getting me down that my style isn't necessarily the style of poetry I like, what's the point in posting it, when I don't even like it?! - well it's something to post so that people know I'm not dead!

On a happier note, my French exam on Tuesday went really well, except at the end when I put together a completely incoherent sentence, but who cares, it should suffice.

Hope everything is good with everyone else!

petit-chou-fleur ]]> ~petit-chou-fleur http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/5364611/ http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/5364611/ Sun, 15 May 2005 13:00:32 PDT
Of all the lessons to end on, it was double Geography on Thursday, I can safely say they were two of the most boring hours of my life, I needed props for my eyelids!

Friday was a really good day. Took my camera to school, only to discover I forgot to put bateries in, argh!! Luckily I got =SpunkieMunkie to send me his so that turned out ok! We said goodbye to our form tutor and had a big class photo, and then went to assembly. I still havent got Don't Stop Me Now by Queen out of my head, although I love that song so maybe it's not such a bad thing! Randomly wandered round the hall gettin people to sign my shirt - why did I forget a pen?!

A big group of about 30 of us went bowling afterwards which was great fun! Everyone was taking pictures - I remembered my camera that time!! We all had a great laugh, it was a rather good day I must say - until I had to rush off to get back in time to go to my Dad's, oops!

And to top it all off, it's my birthday tomorrow! Yay! 16 finally

Now to get my head down to learning everything for my French speaking exam on Tuesday ...

petit-chou-fleur ]]> ~petit-chou-fleur http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/5319568/ http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/5319568/ Tue, 10 May 2005 10:51:43 PDT Had my first exam today, was incredibly easy though - you were allowed notes - so it was basically copying, I suppose it has eased me into the start of the next 8 or so weeks I'll be having of them It's scaring me how close they are!
My confidence in my English skills has been restored, I got an A* on an essay we got back today, so hopefully I'll be able to perform like that in exam conditions!
Well I've submitted the good poems out of the ones I wrote last week, thank you for all the comments and s I really appreciate it! I might get down to writing some more, but we shall see... That's about it I suppose...

petit-chou-fleur ]]> ~petit-chou-fleur http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/5275373/ http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/5275373/ Thu, 05 May 2005 14:06:49 PDT 'I would never bother you
I would never promise to
I would never follow you
I would never bother you

Never speak a word again
I will crawl away for good
I will move away from here
You won't be afraid of fear
No thought was put into this
Always knew it would come to this
Things have never been so swell
I have never failed to fail

Pain
You know you're right

I'm so warm and calm inside
I no longer have to hide
Let's talk about someone else
Sterling silver begins to melt
Nothing really bothers her
She just wants to love herself

I will move away from here
You won't be afraid of fear
No thought was put into this
Always knew it would come to this
Things have never been so swell
I have never failed to fail

You know you're right

Pain ...'

I'm sick of all the mindless assumptions that are made, and how once past actions make an imprint on how your personality is viewed you can never escape them. Constant miscalculations are made and are they ever corrected? NO!

I can't stand being judged and told who I am, when I know damn well that I am not that person. We all have times when we say the wrong thing and I truly feel the remorse from deep down come to the surface, but I am not vindictive or selfish, and I can certainly put myself in someone else's shoes!

Sorry to rant, but it just seems unfair that when I try to argue my corner, I am dismissed and helplessly ignored! Life is so full of injustices, it just gets to me more than ever sometimes.

Aside from all that I've been writing a lot of poetry the past couple of days, so there should be a supply of submissions coming your way. I've been deleting a lot of old and basically 'rubbish' deviations, and I've also been updating some of the preview images for my poetry, so there are some older deviations that might appear in your devwatch (sorry about that!). Can't wait until the summer, only 5 days of school left

petit-chou-fleur ]]> ~petit-chou-fleur http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/5245929/ http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/5245929/ Mon, 02 May 2005 10:32:33 PDT

This weekend has been pretty jam-packed. How I wish we always got an extended weekend... you can do so much more!!! I think I've travelled the most I ever have in three days before and by the most varied modes of transport!
I went to see my friend who lives where I did before I moved. We went wandering round Luton and I met some new people, which is always fun! We watched Lord of the Rings on tv, we decided we didn't like Frodo. I'm sure my sympathy for him has faded as I've watched that film more, Sam is so much more loyal and 'nice'! There was the most spectacular thunderstorm on Saturday night, there were continual flashes of lightning, exciting but did nothing for my fatigue!
We wandered round St. Albans on Sunday and drank strawberries and cream Frappaccinos from Starbucks - how lovely they are!!
Went shopping today, and then just lazed around on here for ages, lol.

I can't wait til exams are over and we have extended holidays, it's gonna be so cool - doing anything random I feel like! I'm also doing more work experience which should be fun and helpful I hope! However I've got to survive exams first. It's not hte exams so much, just organising my revision so that I can successfully say I couldn't have done better if I'd tried!

Certain relationships are ever-present in my thoughts, and my instinctive views on them is scaring me, that's not how I 'should' feel!!! I feel like I need some sort of support from somewhere, but I don't know where... I want to meet some new people, but how and who?? The same old things are constantly whizzing round...and round...and my thoughts are jumbled and confused, am I happy? Am I discontented? Am I lonely? heaven only knows...

petit-chou-fleur ]]> ~petit-chou-fleur http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/5186505/ http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/5186505/ Mon, 25 Apr 2005 14:35:38 PDT We got to do a description in English, we had to build tension. I wrote about a dream - hopefully I'll be able to post it but it depends if I get it back or not.

It seems repetitive to say this, but I read another of the most amazing books I've ever read this week, I just finished it tonight. The Drowning Tree by Carol Goodman. I think I cried the most I ever have after finishing any book as I read the last couple of chapters of that book. The whole way the book interweaves the storylines, intrigue and emotion is just astounding. I can't begin to tell you about the eloquency of description and emotional connection you feel with the characters. In a word: AMAZING!

I've been in a whirlwind of emotion these past few days, Saturday I slipped back into highly depressive mode, yesterday was a recovery from that and now I feel happy about everything, which is always a good sign

petit-chou-fleur ]]> ~petit-chou-fleur http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/5176288/ http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/5176288/ Sun, 24 Apr 2005 12:40:04 PDT I've got another poem to post which I did a few weeks back but never got round to posting so I'll get that up when I get round to it too.
Had a pretty fun weekend really, but now back to the constant reminder of the vital revision I really should get round to doing...

petit-chou-fleur ]]> ~petit-chou-fleur http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/5129802/ http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/5129802/ Tue, 19 Apr 2005 13:03:41 PDT
My weekend was alright - an improvement on the last one I suppose, and I got to spend the whole of Sunday lounging around, reading, listening to music etc. So long as I'm in the mood for doing little, it is one of the most relaxing things!

I finished perhaps one of the best books I've ever read today. After it taking me two weeks to get round to reading the first 100 pages, I in effect read the other 400 in around two days in all. It's full of so many twists in storyline and emotion that it left me in a whirlwind by the end. Many of the reviews liken it to the Da Vinci Code - but this has characters that seem as if they exist somewhere in this world. The fact it's in first person probably aids that, you are taken through all his feelings and the effects everything that happens to him has. So overall I thoroughly recommend you borrow or buy The Rule Of Four by Ian Caldwell and Dustin Thomason, it is well worth reading!!

petit-chou-fleur ]]> ~petit-chou-fleur http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/5058857/ http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/5058857/ Mon, 11 Apr 2005 09:02:11 PDT Back to the constant reminder of the looming exams. Apparently it was appropriate for out head of year to 'pile on the pressure' by literally saying those three words - I put enough pressure on myself without having people I don't care about reminding me of their expectations. However I'm debating when is the best time to start revising, what in this world is more tedious?!?!
Everything seems to be going smoothly at the moment - friends, school, my general thought processes etc. Thankfully I've stopped getting into 'roundabout' mode as I like to call it, as the sleep deprivation it caused me really was becoming rather frustrating. Why does my brain find it necessary to think about everything all the time and analyse it so unnecessarily critically?! However there's not much to worry about at the moment so until something triggers it, it's dormant for the moment.
Sun's been out the last couple of days, always makes a change especially since it decided to snow a bit on Friday - what is with British weather?! (Just realised I seem to be using a lot of question marks and exclamation marks - shows that this journal entry really should end now, it's getting rather tedious!)

petit-chou-fleur ]]> ~petit-chou-fleur http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/4987428/ http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/4987428/ Sun, 03 Apr 2005 11:46:11 PDT Wednesday to Friday I went to revision days at Leeds Metropolitan University which were really good fun and of course useful - except the early starts! I was so glad of a lie in yesterday morning!
I spent most of yesterday reading the book of the the ring which was really good and we watched it later on.
Went to Matt's ( *SpunkieMunkie ) birthday party thing last night which was fun, basically watched Matt explode a can all over himself and sat squashed with four people on a sofa. We mixed every spirit we could find, it made a kind of tasteless concoction. Later on we watched the ring which is supposed to be one of the scariest films ever but to be honest I really couldn't see what was so scary about it! I mean the book was 100 times better and I got more scared reading it than watching it! Emma (~duveau23) was tipsy and was being generally funny and off-the-wall.
I was planning on spending today doing my music composition but I keep reaching a dead end with it - how the hell am I ever gonna finish it? Hopefully it'll suddenly decide to fall into place...
It's gonna be weird going back to school tomorrow, this holiday has been really good and going back to school is gonna mean I'll have to actually get down to some revision...
Things at the moment are all going well (except the music part but i'll discount that!) so hopefully they'll continue to go as smoothly as possible right up to exams.
That's about it, boring as it is for a journal entry.

petit-chou-fleur ]]> ~petit-chou-fleur http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/4934806/ http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/4934806/ Mon, 28 Mar 2005 14:16:08 PST

It was my step-brother's 18th birthday today so we went out for a meal at an Indian restaurant - no matter how hard I try I just cannot make myself enjoy Indian food. I forced down half a Chicken Korma but decided I'd rather not be sick and so underwent the semi-embarassment (don't ask me where that came from!) of having the waiter take away an almost full dish. All the waiters came round our table and we shouted the whole restaurant down with out of tune shouting from which vague imitations of words could be deciphered (ok I'm exaggerating we're not that bad) and also a vague likening to the tune of 'Happy Birthday'. It was funny when we came to the name, the waiters just mumbled nothingness. Then my sister and other step-brother started flicking rice at each other (never take them to a public place, lol) and then we left.

After that I went to the cinema with Matt (*SpunkieMunkie) and Emma (~ duveau23), we went to see a film called 'Darkness', I'd never heard of it before but it sounded reasonable. After we'd seen it we just walked out shouting 'what?!?!', the ending really made no sense at all - we assume they either:
1. Are going to make a sequel
2. Ran out of money and so just shoved on an ending
3. Lost the will to bother
Films like that although not particularly 'good' do provide lots of ammo for laughter which is always good! We waited outside for my step-dad to pick us up. Then we were talking about something that had happened and I said : 'Then a man in a van walked past' sometimes I am so stupid its unbelievable, I'm sure my mouth likes to play tricks on my thoughts by doing something totally different.

Anyway I think the seriousness of my journals has disappeared, I suppose I haven't entered 'pensive' mode while I've wanted to write one of these journals. I suppose at least it stops people thinking I'm depressed, which is always good!

petit-chou-fleur ]]> ~petit-chou-fleur http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/4921450/ http://petit-chou-fleur.deviantart.com/journal/4921450/ Sun, 27 Mar 2005 04:19:08 PST .
Here's a quiz thingy I stole from and

[Name] Sarah _O:
[Nicknames] none really
[Location] Leeds,UK
[Eye color] Brown
[Height] 5"4
[Shoe size] size 6/7 UK
[Parents still together?] nope
[Siblings?] 1 sister
[Nieces/Nephews?] no
[Kids of your own?] no
[Grandkids?] nope...I'm 15!!!
[Pets?] 2 black and white cats called Felix and Silvester [Education?] last year of school
[Have any credit cards?] non
[What do you drive?] nuthin

Favourites
[Colour] blue/black/turquoise
[Number] 2
[Animal] cats
[Vehicle] dno
[Scent] dnt really no...
[Shape] circle
[Drinks] Water
[Book] there's loads!
[Band] don't know depends on my mood
[Song] Space Dye Vest - Dream Theater

Do you...
[Colour your hair?] nope
[Have tattoos?] no
[Piercing?] ears
[cheat on tests/homework?] no
[Drink/Smoke?] Drink now and again
[Wish you could live somewhere else] no not really i'm fine as i am
[want more piercings?] nope
[Like cleaning?] god no!!
[Write in cursive or print?] print
[Carry a donor card?] no
[Swear a lot?] no, only if I'm angry
[Own a web cam?] nein
[Know how to drive?] No
[Diet?] whatever I feel like eating really
[Own a mobile phone?] Yup
[Ever get off the damn computer?] yeh, i havent been on for 3 days!

Have you ever...
[Gotten a speeding ticket?] No
[Been in a wreck?] no
[Been arrested?] nope
[Been in a fist fight?] No
[Kicked someone in the nuts?] hmm dnt think so I'm not that mean
[Stolen anything?] err yeh
[Held a gun?] No
[Drank?] yeh
[Been so drunk you couldn't remember your name?] nope
[Considered a life of crime?] No
[Considered being a hooker?] nope
[Been married?] nope
[Cried over a girl?] yeh
[Cried over a boy?] errr, yeh
[Lied to someone?] yep, i try to avoid it when I can though

Now
[Current mood] confused, happy and hopeful all mushed together (I have no idea why!)
[Current music] none
[Current taste] dno
[Current hair] light brown and long
[Current book] The Last Juror by John Grisham
[Current cds in stereo] North - Something Corporate

[Current job] unemployed

The last time
[Last book you read] Sickened by Julie Gregory
[Last movie you saw] Sliding Doors
[Last thing you had to drink] water!
[Last thing you ate] sausage sandwich
[Last person you talked to on the phone] errrrr my mum
[Do drugs?] nope
[ave a dream that keeps coming back] nope my dreams usually consist of the thoughts whizzing round my head
[Play an instrument?] play violin, teaching myself guitar and piano (its not really working though lol)
[Believe there is life on other planets?] God only knows!
[Read the newspaper?] nope never
[Have any gay or lesbian friends?] Yes
[Believe in miracles?] Don't know, I believe in fate
[Believe it's possible to remain faithful forever] Yes, if you truly want it
[Consider yourself tolerant of others] yup
[Favorite candy] Cakes are better