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]]> ~pyro5050 http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/3667098/ http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/3667098/ Sun, 24 Oct 2004 22:15:24 PDT ~pyro5050 http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/2270314/ http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/2270314/ Wed, 21 Apr 2004 18:15:18 PDT
i am done here soon, i just asked my parents if they would have my car waiting for me when i get to cold lake... my mom said hell no. damn damn damn.... how i wanted that car. i am gonna get it for sunday weather they like it or not... fucking 10 hours of paintball and no car? that would be hell....

i have to write one of my finals now. so i can only write two tommorow and one on friday.... so.... well.... yeah....

oh and i have had a total brain freeze on writeing and drawing and shit like that.... so.... yeah.... ]]> ~pyro5050 http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/2002356/ http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/2002356/ Sat, 13 Mar 2004 01:03:36 PST
secondly, i know i have not submitted anything in a very long time, that is cool though. ]]> ~pyro5050 http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/1813332/ http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/1813332/ Sun, 08 Feb 2004 14:10:35 PST ~pyro5050 http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/1798012/ http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/1798012/ Thu, 05 Feb 2004 11:44:49 PST



so here i am sitting in my room, realizing that in 24 hours i am going to be writing a fucking mid term about the history of ancient ROME, GREECE, GERMANY, FRANCE, BRITAN, SPAIN, HUN'S INVASION, PALINSTIEN, EGYPT, and then i need to know everything from 3000 BCE to 1598 CE, *common era, before Crist is a religious term, it's been ruled out by historans.*

yeah, i think i be fucked, i gotta know popes, emporors, when they changed cities names, when constantinopal fell both times, when the byzantium empire fell, when the holy crusades happened, when the welsh bowmen invented giving the middle finger. heeheehee

i can learn you on that, the middle finger salute originated from the hundred years war, which actually lasted closer to 120 years. the english troops trying to enforce their control in france decided to take more land by force. well, good for them, the traditional style of warfare on continental europe was a forward rush with cavalry to crush your opponet under your weight, france had one of the better lord ships, so alot of knights. the english told the welsh bowmen *who used a modified traditional english longbow making it more powerful and such. as the french came at the english with all their nobles, the welsh bowmen opened fire and cut them down, hundreds of french noble men were killed in one single battle. all because of the welsh bowmen.

now when the french would capture a welsh bowmen in any battle after the inital one, they figured what ways to punish a prisoner of war, well they could kill them, or make the welsh bowman unable to perform his profession of choice by cutting off his middle finger and his pointer finger, the two fingers used to draw a bow. later in the war, the welsh bowmen knew that they were supprem and also that their fingers were prizes among the french army. so before a battle would start, the welsh bowmen knowing this would " salute" the french forces and dare them to come and get their fingers, instead the would hold a arrow across their palm and use their pinky and ring finger and pointer to hold the arrow and their middle finger in salute, to show that they were a bowman, their arrows were straight and ready, and they could still draw their bow.



there you go, the history of the middle finger.



i hope you enjoyed that. ]]> ~pyro5050 http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/1752035/ http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/1752035/ Tue, 27 Jan 2004 17:12:35 PST
so... my grandfather was diagnosed with cancer last week, ya know what this means? i have a genetic predisposition for cancer. before i had just highly suspected it, but now it's true. not looking good for me. also as a male in my family i have a high risk for high cholesterol. i am working on that though so i don't have a heart attack. my head hurts, i have been having little blackouts lately, so that can only mean one thing, my concusions are acting up, something serious may be happening, if it gets worse, i'm gonna book me a head scan to make sure.

yeah, that's essentailly my week in a nutshell. ]]> ~pyro5050 http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/1695104/ http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/1695104/ Sat, 17 Jan 2004 11:46:24 PST never miond. ]]> ~pyro5050 http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/1509190/ http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/1509190/ Mon, 08 Dec 2003 21:17:07 PST [link]

go check that out, made me laugh fro the last half hour.


if your in the mood to laugh and be a little sad

go watch this

[link]

so yeah, ]]> ~pyro5050 http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/1498265/ http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/1498265/ Sat, 06 Dec 2003 10:59:20 PST

thursday: last day of clases, went out, wound up drinking more than i should have, danced on some speakers with these two fine women, got some phone numbers, passed out on the couch upstairs, :0 that's about it for thursday, i know i make it sound lame, but it was so fun, one of the most fun nights i have had, in a while.

Friday night *at least i think it was friday, it was last night*

so go to the duke, Jake Daniels was on cheap last night, so me being the smart person i am, i grab me a double. now JD is too damn sweet, it tastes like shit when mixxed with coke, needless to say i hate it. never again.

went to spin, one of my roomies was compleatly pissed out of her mind, we all screwed up with that aspect of the night but, that is for her to tell people and not me,

well i was hanging out last night i did not want to dance with new people i did not want to get a phone number,i just wanted to drink and have fun, did i ever, charisa *i don't know how to spell her name but it sounds like that* she's a fine woman, like really fine, well she was teaching me how to dance and how to pick up women last night, i know how to dance like a latin boy now, which means... i can be a cabana boy! *does little cabana boy dance*

ok running a little low on sleep right now,

oh oh oh, MSN convo with christine!

*N*So... ummmm... right... i'll get right on that... ummm.... yeah.: the fact that i stoped drinking.... 4 hours ago,
#C#*does happy dance*: lmao
*N*So... ummmm... right... i'll get right on that... ummm.... yeah.: and started 16 hours ago
#C#*does happy dance*: ...so you're not hungover because you're still drunk?
*N*So... ummmm... right... i'll get right on that... ummm.... yeah.: i don't get hangovers,
#C#*does happy dance*: ...because you stay drunk.
*N*So... ummmm... right... i'll get right on that... ummm.... yeah.: and i am not drunk, i only had a beer an hour for the last three hours of my night


i think i'm done now, ]]> ~pyro5050 http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/1487644/ http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/1487644/ Wed, 03 Dec 2003 23:46:25 PST i just want to sleep but if i go to sleep i'll never get it done. ARRRRR!

anyhow, in better news... wait, i don't whave better news, other than my computer is so fucking slow none of the words have showed up yet so i can't see any of the mistakes i have made and i am not gonna change them so HA! well... it's not a good thing though ]]> ~pyro5050 http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/1461182/ http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/1461182/ Fri, 28 Nov 2003 02:08:30 PST i went out tonight, met some asian girls, they were really conceiteed. saddly they refused to get to know me or john the guy whio i met otnight so... :9 their lose i guess, i am pretty sure carisa is taking home dale tonight and not gonna let him sleep alone. ian is upstairs with heather, and nathan is alone down here typing this thing up. it's sad in how unfair this world is. but then agian i am slightly intoxicated enough to see my mistakes, so i will leave you with this,

help nathan get a Girlfriend, it would make my life alot easier. ]]> ~pyro5050 http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/1443163/ http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/1443163/ Sun, 23 Nov 2003 21:19:48 PST well i am finally writting more of it. i am on page three, and just wanted to take a quick break, i think i found my brain for a second. i hope i did. i really do hope i did. it would be so nice to think like that again.
oh and to update you on the battle of november 3rd, there will be a deviation posted in a few min,

if you don't know what i'm talking about go read my journal for november 3rd. ]]> ~pyro5050 http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/1416631/ http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/1416631/ Mon, 17 Nov 2003 21:16:38 PST but only because she added some really weird questions at the end, I got this survey from janis down in kentucy, I didn’t want to post it here, I really didn’t, but mel made me *shakes fist*

1. WHAT COLOR ARE YOUR KITCHEN PLATES? I don’t own kitchen plates, I own a little green plastic bowl that is a demi god and talks to me.
2. WHAT BOOK ARE YOU READING NOW? RA Salvator – the thousand orcs again.
3. WHAT'S ON YOUR MOUSE PAD? It’s a plain black mouse pad with a wrist brace for when I had broken my right wrist and my dad brought it home from work,
4. WHAT'S YOUR FAVORITE BOARD GAME? Risk, what other game can you have people get so amazingly pissed off at other than monopoly
5. FAVORITE MAGAZINE? I don’t read magazines, and when I do it’s like a PC magazine, cause I’m a geek.
6. FAVORITE SMELL? The smell of a girls hair when she just got out of the shower.
7. LEAST FAVORITE SMELL? Moldy beer
8. WHAT'S THE FIRST THING YOU THINK OF WHEN YOU WAKE UP IN THE MORNING? Fucking alarm clock
9. FAVOURITE COLOUR? I have a relationship with natural wood, I do not like colours painted on, give me the natural colour of a pine board.
10. LEAST FAVOURITE COLOUR? I think that colour on my parrot gets the medal
11. HOW MANY RINGS BEFORE YOU ANSWER THE PHONE? I have no idea, I don’t count, I just answer the phone in the middle of a ring
12.FUTURE CHILD'S NAMES? Males: Brian (my dad’s name) Jamal (some reason I really like it now) Females: Malee (just sounds cool) Ashley (I really like this name) Dominique (sounds cool, Dom also works at Backstreet, she’s cool too)
13. WHAT IS MOST IMPORTANT IN LIFE? Putting one foot infront of the other when the odds are so much stacked against you getting what you desire
CHOCOLATE OR VANILLA? Can I have both?
15. DO YOU LIKE TO DRIVE FAST? Ummmm…. Right, next question please, I only average around 150km/h when I drive
16. DO YOU SLEEP WITH A STUFFED ANIMAL? I only have one here, it’s a small bear that I got with a bigger bear when I was born, he sits by my computer, not in my arms, he protects my pants from those damn gnomes
17. STORMS-COOL OR SCARY? Ahhh to watch lightning crash across the sky is one of the most beautiful things you will see
18. WHAT TYPE WAS YOUR FIRST CAR? Toyota Corrola 1991
19. IF YOU COULD MEET ONE PERSON DEAD OR ALIVE WHO WOULD IT BE? I refuse to answer this question as I will just incriminate myself more than I already have, but the second person on my list is Adolf Hitler
20. FAVOURITE ALCOHOLIC DRINK? Alexander Kieths
21. WHAT IS YOUR SIGN & BIRTHDAY? My sign sez “maximum stay 16 days” litterally, Scorpio Oct 26
22. DO YOU EAT THE STEMS OF BROCCOLI? Who doesn’t?
23. IF YOU COULD HAVE ANY JOB WHAT WOULD IT BE? The serta sheep counter.
24. IF YOU COULD HAVE ANY COLOR HAIR WHAT WOULD IT BE? For some reason I like my hair thank you very much
25. IS THE GLASS HALF FULL OR HALF-EMPTY? For god sakes people just order another drink!
26. FAVOURITE MOVIES? Bravehart, Green Mile, Swordfish, Schindlers List, Donnie Darko, Amistade, LOTR 1+2
27. DO YOU TYPE WITH YOUR FINGERS ON THE RIGHT KEYS? They start near to the right keys but they fly where they want to.
28. WHAT'S UNDER YOUR BED? Pant gnomes,
29. WHAT IS YOUR FAVOURITE NUMBER? 5
30. WHAT IS YOUR SINGLE BIGGEST FEAR? The future, (I got all the fears covered baby!)
31. SAY ONE NICE THING ABOUT THE PERSON WHO SENT THIS TO YOU. A lot more attractive than she believes she is
32. PERSON(S) MOST LIKELY TO RESPOND? No one cause I ain’t emailing it
33. PERSON(S) YOU SENT THIS TO WHO IS LEAST LIKELY TO RESPOND? No one!
34. FAVOURITE CD? Not sure, but I am pretty sure when “the Spin Volume 4.555 comes out it will kick ass!
35. FAVOURI... ]]> ~pyro5050 http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/1397512/ http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/1397512/ Thu, 13 Nov 2003 17:57:49 PST at least i didn't break my wrist ]]> ~pyro5050 http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/1393597/ http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/1393597/ Wed, 12 Nov 2003 20:26:53 PST i got a fucking astro assignment due tommorow, and like usual have not started, still looking for a girl that will take the time to get to know me, still trying to get my wrist back to top notch shape, still hurts whenever it bends and such so...

in better news, i spent $8.55 on a pencil today, hopefully now that i have a good pencile i can do some sketches in this damn book i have, maybe get my mind off ashley, that'd be nice,

well guess what, all that stuff i typed up there has not even shown up on the screen so i can't make sure i didn't make any spelling mistakes so HA!

and now to turn on some music and do the astro homework, and then play some Starcraft, and pssibly some Morrowind, Damn you phill and ken! damn you to hell! i'm gonna beat the daylight outta both of you when i see you next, ]]> ~pyro5050 http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/1365047/ http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/1365047/ Thu, 06 Nov 2003 14:29:10 PST 1 week ago: couldn’t think
1 year ago: was insane out of my mind
1 week from now: better be in class
1 year from now: still in university
1 hour from now: sleeping problally
1 minute from now: still filling out this fucking survey
I hurt: too many people
I love: the thought of falling in love again
I hate: missing out…
I fear: the future
I hope: I become me again
I feel: sick
I hide: everything
I drive: No, my car is in C.Dot
I miss: her
I need: money
I think: too fast
01.name: Nathan H.
02. nickname(s): been called py, Smark, Shorty, Midget #1, Syco (yes spelt like that, I got confirmation)
03. gender: Male
04. bday: october 26, 1984
05. location: The Bridge
06. school: University of Lethbridge
07. screename: Pyro5050, Antz_50, fiftyantz, Dark antz
08. zodiac sign: Scorpio
BELIEVE IT OR NOT
01. aliens: yes, how else do you exsplain the limits of the human mind we meet everyday?
02. angels: have too, if there is none, what do we yearn to meet again?
03. demons: only a few, they are special,
04. heaven: not your heaven, I have a place that is better for me
05. hell: only it isn’t called hell, Kual, the land of death,
06. God: no, sounds weird, talk to me about it.
07. your friends: do I believe my friends? Or do I believe in my friends? Either way I guess it’s yes
08. miracles: how else do you exsplain me getting a Girlfriend?
09. remaining faithful: How can you not?
10. magic: yes, magic is everything, the way a child will place full trust in their parents hands is magic, the way a bird can care for it’s young is magic, you tell me magic does not exist. Do it.
11. astrology: oh we get lectures about astronomy and astrology every Tuesday and Thursday in astronomy! no,
12. love at first sight: has to be able to happen
13. fate: no I guess not, I make my own life
14. santa clause: damn fat men watching my children!
15. easter bunny: yes, but he’s dead, I shot him last year, the little fucker was stealing my candy
16. tooth fairy: nope
LOVEEE
01. bF or gF?: Nope
02. name: ummmmm, right.
03. ever been in love?: I would like to think so
04. how long was your longest relationship?: 2 years and 10 months
05. do you have a crush now?: can’t say I do
06. marriage age: after I know I can support a family and we would not be living in poverty
07. what is the trait that attracts you to someone the most?: a persons eyes are the first thing I notice, and if they can be happy. You can’t love if you can’t be happy
08. do you think looks can overrule personality? Nope,
09. does age matter to you? Right now yes, I can’t really be dating a 16 year old now can I? I would like someone who is in the same age area, like 3 years either way, but that would also bring in 16 year olds, so maturity comes into effect too
hAVE YOU EVER
01. drank alcohol?: noooooooooooooooooooo
02. smoked cigarettes?: honestly no, never have never will
03. done drugs?: nope,
04. kissed someone of the opposite sex?: yes
05. kissed someone of the same sex?: heeheehee, I kissed, jeff and jason (19times) and I think I got alex and Phill, I know I kissed jamie,
06. had sex?: Nope
07. failed a grade?: nope, never failed anything until 1 month ago,
08. cheated on a bF or gF?: No
09. kissed your friends bF or gF?: No
10. fantasized about an animal?: like having sex with a animal?
11. broken a bone?: ~looks at wrists and feet~ nope, I don’t think so,
12. eaten dog food?: heeheehee, yeah,
13. licked something nonliving?: heeheehee, yeah
14. been in a fight?: yea, I lost, damn truck
15. been on a plane?: yeppers
16. driven a car?: Fuck no! you think they can trust me behind a wheel!?!?... ]]> ~pyro5050 http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/1355303/ http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/1355303/ Mon, 03 Nov 2003 18:57:08 PST i have a battle going on in my room,

as only two or three of you knew, i had a pop can army going on in my house, upstairs we had like 500 cans down here in my room i had the reinforcements, about 50 cans,

now the pop cans are assembled and looking for a enemy, and guess who showed up? the orange juice bottles! that's right, the orange juice bottles 5th divison is here, in my room ready to crush any cans, literally, so i'll keep you posted on the battle stats, maybe even do a little liturature posting, ]]> ~pyro5050 http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/1350416/ http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/1350416/ Sun, 02 Nov 2003 14:39:24 PST
spread the word people! spread it! ]]> ~pyro5050 http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/1349918/ http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/1349918/ Sun, 02 Nov 2003 12:17:36 PST Bronze metals to the girls of lethbridge. beat the UVic girls in a shoot out, after a 3:3 game, pretty impressive, now we go on to the UofA PANDA'S Vs the UBC girls, for gold. GO PANDAS! GOOD WORK HORNS! ]]> ~pyro5050 http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/1345509/ http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/1345509/ Sat, 01 Nov 2003 10:00:23 PST
i wanna sleep but i can't, i am so exaushted but i can't fall asleep any more cause i slept like 7 hours last night. much to long for me, but anyhow i got some phone numbers and email addresses i gotta check, went to the cab the other night had some fun, didn't get drunk but who really needs too? i danced with these three girls from singapore all night and got the phone number of one of the bar tenders. she's really hot but do we really think she will go out with me? no. ahh that great self esteem is showing up again. time to read some more and figure out how to make a fucking web page. got a few things to do. talk to you all later. ]]> ~pyro5050 http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/1342614/ http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/1342614/ Thu, 30 Oct 2003 17:36:50 PST oh well. ]]> ~pyro5050 http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/1328768/ http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/1328768/ Mon, 27 Oct 2003 11:25:23 PST

so this girl i find very attractive and all, i was gonna sk her out, well yeah, she has a boyfriend i find out today, that's the most dissapointing thing you can ever find out. the girl who you really have a huge crush on has a BF, and she seems happy with him. so BANG! nathan down, but nothing i can do to change that so i'm not even gonna try and change it, just see if i can be a friend. and look for another girl to ask out. actually i already had one i was gonna ask out before glynuis, but i just couldn't get my head around the fact.

like seriously, can you see me with one of these little hot asian women that are walking all around this city? my god! and i find asian women very attractive. i just need to get up the nerve to ask michell out. like it was hard for me to get the nerve to ask out glynuis even though i never did, but for me to apporch and ask out a woman who is of the most attractive races on earth in my opinion, like FUCK!

so now i gotta get more brave and ask out michell, or find out if she has a BF, that would be a good starter.

that's another thing! why do all these girls who i like have Boyfriends? like seriously! there has to be one single girl who is really nice out here, hell even the bitchy girls have Boyfriends! i think christine lied to me when she said there were single women everywhere down here, there are women everywhere, hot ones at that, but not many single! FOR FUCK SAKES! onwards and upwards!

rember to live life and love life. if you don't you will never be able to fall in love. ]]> ~pyro5050 http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/1322329/ http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/1322329/ Sat, 25 Oct 2003 18:54:12 PDT heeheehee* got about 9 housrs leftin the nihgt, i'm gonna be partien g thll it's late as fuck *phone rinnging* gotta gt it,

i got he phone someon for allison, :_) heeheehe, :_ she's not here, _) she left a oboptu 15 min ago, fuck, hit the damn bracket buttoin damn finger, at least i;m not driving! and i am not dreppreseesd at the tim i drink, righ alex, ]]> ~pyro5050 http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/1321464/ http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/1321464/ Sat, 25 Oct 2003 13:47:26 PDT ten we went to average joes, hung out there and met Lisa and Virgina, they were hot, but then virgina was totally wasted and well was quite open, not like, i'm gonna sleep with you open, but they i'm so depressed open, it was sad, but we had fun anyway.

so i got home at 4:30, tired as fuck, woke up at 12:30 today, and going out again tonight, probally gonna wind up at spin again tonight so if you are in the mood to party with nathan, go to spin, tonight, not sure when we will get there but we will, guaranteed, post more tommorow after recovery ]]> ~pyro5050 http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/1307171/ http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/1307171/ Tue, 21 Oct 2003 20:54:28 PDT
leave me alone, i don't want to die like this, i want to die, alone, in the trees, in the light of the stars and the waterfalls from above, i want to die in my lovers arms, i want to die in the peace of my kingdom, i want to die... away from here.

leave me be, let me fly on my own wings, higher than ever before. let me find my soul again, and meet her in my dreams, let me fight for her safety and come home to her open arms, let me be loved and cared for by someone who i can love and care for the same.

fuck you, let me go to my home. ]]> ~pyro5050 http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/1296544/ http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/1296544/ Sun, 19 Oct 2003 10:43:03 PDT

well last night, christine and i went to the tank house, a newly named pub on the south side of town, so i could make Samara not feel so "new" and actually have someone to serve, but we left at like 8:00 cause we were both tired as hell.

i get home and go down stairs and study for a bit and then i went for a walk outside, when i got back i went upstairs for a sec and my roomates were like "hey common, were going to Spin, you should come with us"

now... how many times have i said no to FIVE beautiful women? five you ask? my three roommates and then two of their friends were here.

so i was out at Spin until 2am, tired as fuck when i got home, like literally, but i sat upstairs and talked with people till 4am,

funny thing is, at spin i saw like 5 people from my addictions councelling course. yep, and we were all drinking, i think ashley was drunk as a skunk! but that's just me,!

so now it's the morning after, i'm sitting here at the computer, trying to figure out why i was dreaming about canadian flags last night, might be that i am literally surrounded by them. meh, gonna go upstairs now, and then go study with Samara, ]]> ~pyro5050 http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/1272001/ http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/1272001/ Mon, 13 Oct 2003 13:58:32 PDT ~pyro5050 http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/1258394/ http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/1258394/ Fri, 10 Oct 2003 07:04:05 PDT that is all i have to say right now as i have a mid term now, ]]> ~pyro5050 http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/1251000/ http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/1251000/ Wed, 08 Oct 2003 13:01:32 PDT
phill don't worry, i'll burn ya a copy and mail it up, you don't have to spend the 20.39 on it, ]]> ~pyro5050 http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/1249140/ http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/1249140/ Tue, 07 Oct 2003 22:29:11 PDT meh i can do it tommorow,

wrist hurts when bent down. can't move it side to side, the risk of breaking it later and haveing sugery done in December is looking pretty good. metal plate in the wrist! WHOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!! yeah, i'm bored. but i got a idea from kennigan!

Song: Give Up the Grudge
Artist: GOB
Rateing: 5/5

yeah it kicks ass. go get it if ya don't got it! ]]> ~pyro5050 http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/1244874/ http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/1244874/ Mon, 06 Oct 2003 21:59:46 PDT
if i hire people to kill people, i go to jail.

if i use people to kill people i go to jail

if i consort with someone who is doing something illigall i go to jail.

if i have illially possessed items in my house i go to jail!

but if i walk into a diner and display my freedom of speach by yelling out against the goverment i get thrown into a loony bin!

how fair is that? ]]> ~pyro5050 http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/1224372/ http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/1224372/ Wed, 01 Oct 2003 13:38:00 PDT not toga, but i made one! ]]> ~pyro5050 http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/1220815/ http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/1220815/ Tue, 30 Sep 2003 14:20:20 PDT yeah some people are gonna be pissed, wow this is loud, i just scanned pics 13-16 i'll keep a live update here, ok to scan a pic in and save it, it first takes the scan then scans it again to save it. 2 times for each pic

3:12: pics 13-16 scanned and saved,

3:12-3:13: pics 17-20 scanned in and saved,

3:14: pics 21-24 scanned in

3:15: pics 21-24 scanned and saved,

3:16: pics 25-28 scanned and saved

*oh this is so exciting!*
3:17: pics 29-32 scanned and saved.

3:19: pics 33-36 scanned and saved! that's the last of em,

whew! that was tough. ]]> ~pyro5050 http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/1198829/ http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/1198829/ Wed, 24 Sep 2003 11:15:17 PDT [my name is]: Nathan
[in the morning i am]: Tired but happy
[all i need is]: Someone to care for.
[if i could see one person right now]: probally Ashley B
[afraid of]: The Future
H A V E Y O U E V E R . . .
[been in love]: Yep
[cried when someone died]: Yep
[drank alcohol]: Nooooooooo
[lied]: Noooooooo

T H I S O R T H A T . . .
[coke or pepsi]: coke, but they both try to kill me...
[flowers or candy]: Always Flowers
[7up or sprite]: sprite
[tall or short]: me, i'm short, i like short people. tall people work good for barricades.

W I T H T H E O P P O S I T E S E X . . .
[what do u notice first?]: eyes
[last person u slow danced with]: that i liked?
[worst thing to say]: not to sure on this one.

W H O . . .
[makes u laugh the most?]: well i guess it would still be phil and alex
[makes you smile]: no one, i always smile, makes people wonder about me.
[gives u a funny feeling when u see them]: god everyone does! do you know how many germs are out there!
[has a crush on u?]: not too sure on this one.
[easier to talk to: boys or girls?]: Guys always guys, women scare me too,

D O Y O U E V E R . . .
[sit waiting for someone special to I.M. u?]: no net, no one that means that much to me.
[save aol/aim conversations]: only once because he said something about the program we were breaking.
[cried because of someone saying something to u]: i laugh, they wonder.

H A V E Y O U E V E R . . .
[fallen for ur best friend]: hmmm, that would sorta make me gay,
[rejected somone]: nope! been rejected.
[used someone]: Always get used never really use people
[been cheated on]: heeheehee, noooooooooooo



W H O W A S T H E L A S T P E R S O N . . .
[u talked to on the phone?]: The Parents
[hugged]: that i liked?
[u instant messaged]: ummm Bitter!
[u laughed with]: Ashley C.

D O Y O U . . .
[color ur hair]: ooooo no.
[ever get off the damn computer]: Always i hate the piece of shit. it takes 30min to boot now and i fucking hate it.
[habla espanol]: Bonjour!

H A V E Y O U / / D O Y O U / / A R E Y O U
[smoke]: Never
[obsessive]: Compulsive! wait not word assosiation.
[could u live without the computer?]: yes, easily
[how many peeps are on ur buddylist?]: i think 28 but i got no net at home soo.
[what's your favorite food?]: right now i'm on a sub kick
[what's ur favorite fruit?]: those berry things... from straw, you know, berrystraws.
[drink alcohol?]: i already said noooooooo
[like watching sunrises or sunset]: when ever i can.
[what hurts the most? physical pain or emotional pain?]: Emotional, physical pain only hurts when you think about it. i got two pieces of metal through my wrist, it doesn't hurt at all.
[trust others way too easily?]: God i trust people way too much.
F I N A L Q U E S T I O N S . . .
[i want]: Someone to love
[i wish]: i wasn't so scared
[i love]: my parents
[i miss]: My Ashley
[i fear]: only the future
[i hear]: too many voices.
[i wonder]: what it's like when it's over
[how do u know its love?]: you never know in your mind only your soul.
[i am]: ready to snap. ]]> ~pyro5050 http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/1195695/ http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/1195695/ Tue, 23 Sep 2003 14:47:00 PDT dead sounds like fun right now, i really do not want to go to astro today, i don't want to be sitting here, i want to go home, sleep and probally see if i can get my fucking net to work. ]]> ~pyro5050 http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/1187207/ http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/1187207/ Sun, 21 Sep 2003 11:57:42 PDT heehee, post more later, as of right now the women soccer team the horns are winning 1-0 vs the calgary dino's, penalty shot goal. ]]> ~pyro5050 http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/1171536/ http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/1171536/ Wed, 17 Sep 2003 07:25:17 PDT ~pyro5050 http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/1164075/ http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/1164075/ Mon, 15 Sep 2003 07:24:28 PDT yep, not really new but i still hate em,

onwards! ummm not much else to say, other than to christine, i did that inked think you wanted it looks weird, but i did a scan of it and printed it so i can colour it to see if it looks better. ]]> ~pyro5050 http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/1153578/ http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/1153578/ Fri, 12 Sep 2003 07:31:59 PDT sounds like fun huh? ]]> ~pyro5050 http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/1151402/ http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/1151402/ Thu, 11 Sep 2003 15:27:47 PDT have fun, i gotta go to astronomy and then go home to shower and shave so i can go out tonight, ]]> ~pyro5050 http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/1150191/ http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/1150191/ Thu, 11 Sep 2003 07:33:12 PDT forget about the girl and meet some new people. the smoke is clearing up so i can breath a little better and i don't feel so damn sick now, just damn sick.

if my eyes don't deceive me *which it is possible that they do* there is a scanner over there *points left* and i got pics in there *points at backpack* so i may just get some of my sketches out there soon. they suck but hey! ]]> ~pyro5050 http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/1140476/ http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/1140476/ Mon, 08 Sep 2003 11:23:33 PDT

that's one of those lightbulb idea's ]]> ~pyro5050 http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/1137390/ http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/1137390/ Sun, 07 Sep 2003 12:25:33 PDT
other than that, i feel like i'm gonna be sick right away, food is trying to escape.

post more later ]]> ~pyro5050 http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/1106707/ http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/1106707/ Thu, 28 Aug 2003 12:10:41 PDT my hand in green right now from the bruising. if you ever broke something like this then you would know, Dr. Hurdle who is a great othapedic surgeon *SP* said i hit so hard that it will probally be green for a week more or so. i find that funny.

moving soon, got screwed over, this is all really new for me. because those of you who know me, well i hate to sound conceited, but... i rarely fail and need help from other people, i can normally do everything myself, thats changed, it seems that the only thing i do in lethbridge is get help from other people and ya know i'm not really liking it.

well it hurts to sit here so i'm leaving, meh, nothing i really can do other than bitch about losing my gold watch when i crashed and bitch about getting blood stains on my white shorts.

post more later.... ]]> ~pyro5050 http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/1051353/ http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/1051353/ Fri, 08 Aug 2003 23:37:48 PDT ]]> ~pyro5050 http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/852824/ http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/852824/ Thu, 19 Jun 2003 11:23:05 PDT at least not today i hope. ummm, lots of shit to post so bear with me when you log on and find like 50 poems from me, wait i think i only have like 20 to post, oh well, anyhow...

i'm leaving, ]]> ~pyro5050 http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/769389/ http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/769389/ Wed, 28 May 2003 12:18:53 PDT ~pyro5050 http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/675508/ http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/675508/ Wed, 30 Apr 2003 15:33:10 PDT ~pyro5050 http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/629767/ http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/629767/ Wed, 16 Apr 2003 21:59:46 PDT ~pyro5050 http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/598136/ http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/598136/ Sun, 06 Apr 2003 11:52:41 PDT ~pyro5050 http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/591932/ http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/591932/ Fri, 04 Apr 2003 01:35:45 PST ~pyro5050 http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/583315/ http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/583315/ Mon, 31 Mar 2003 22:28:42 PST
now i have a little binder, i want to put some of the shit i have written on here, but i am being lazy so shush up. quite frankly i am being pelted by so many things right now it ain't funny, and you would never understand anything i said so i might as well try and say some stuff and maybe confuse you a little more.

now you know that little angel pic, of the blue dude walking and his wings fall off, well that pissed me off. i feel like throwing my computer out the damn window.

i am begining to wonder how in this green planet i am still able to see. my eyes are failing on me and it is the scariest thing ever. well concidering i already had this sort of thing happen it ain't that new but it scary. when i was 6 i was hit on the side of my head, with a base ball bat, might exsplain a few other things, but it messed up my eyes, i started to see the induvidual beams of light not the compounded effect, so you see a green light, i see blue, yellow, white, alot of other colours too. yeah it's screwy but what makes it even better is that when i looked into your eyes i could see how you felt. that was fun! imaigne looking into someones eyes after they were yelled at and seeing alot of blue and brown, then you take them away from it all and give them one of the best days of their life and all along you watch the change in the beams of light go from that blue and brown to a bright yellow and red and brown. it is amazing, her eyes were brown so they that colour was always there.

yeah well it still there, but my eyes are starting to blur and fade, sort of like after i was hit in the eye with a hockey puck, it did this, but it did not hurt as much as this, and it did not happen as long as this is going on, my eyes cannot focus when i read anymore, they can't stay still when i look at the till at work, and they always hurt. i have a feeling my body is falling apart on me, not cool. well gotta go, talk to ya later. ]]> ~pyro5050 http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/568640/ http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/568640/ Wed, 26 Mar 2003 00:39:21 PST If only we can wake up when the world does not turn the way we want it to. if only,

Every now and then the powers from beyond our ideals reach down and reclaim an angel placed amoung us, the need for him elsewhere must have been enourmous, he was needed here more than anyone ever knew.

Goodnight all, have a nice life. ]]> ~pyro5050 http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/567597/ http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/567597/ Tue, 25 Mar 2003 14:31:31 PST

Music: Art of losing American Hi Fi
Watching: Donnie Darko & 8 Mile
Mood: like i fucking know

ok deal here, i have to work tonight, i don't really want to, i hate work, it's so fucking boring and i think to much, it just gives me time to reflect on how much my life really sucks ass. my parents are in Edmonton to see my oldest sister get some award, good for her, just puts more pressure on me, parents comparing me to her, i am proud of her and all, but seriously, i fucking hate having to follow behind her, she is damn smart and i am a compleate numbskull, seriously, here is a grade comparison between me and her.

English 30: me 68% her 92%
Social 30: me 69% her 84%
Physics 30: me 74% her 78%
Math 30: me 92% her 82% (yeah but that maths changed so fuck off)
Chem 30: me 64% her 72%
Bio 30: me 82% her 84%

now how am i to feel good about my grades when she is so damn smart i am kept on getting reminded by people i should be more like her? well guess what people fuck you. you see, she knows that stuff, she is the editor for the UofA school paper, and vice prez of student houseing this year and got hired for a kick ass job next year at the university. but guess what? i know how to make a Uranium core for a A-bomb, i can make low grade C4, i deucted yesterday how to make nitro glycerine from scratch, i know how to ride my bike to extreams, (i looked at it today, it looks a little broken still) so in all actaullity, why is she not told "why can't you destroy the world like your brother can?" huh? IS THAT TOO MUCH TO ASK?

fuck off, ]]> ~pyro5050 http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/561407/ http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/561407/ Sun, 23 Mar 2003 02:11:38 PST
ok, first things first, i think i just screwed one of my friends over. concidering he is now dating the woman i have a crush on and it hurt when they were not even telling me, like seriously people, you both know i like you and you both know i can handle some tough shit, just say it already! hell i handeled one of best friends sleeping with my ex-gf and going out with her, and i handled ex-gf's breaking up with me for no apparent reason, i know how to deal with these, just tell me so it is not under the damn table. i deal with shit better if my stupid brain is not fighting with me telling me things i don't know are true. just a note for you two, if one of you reads this, don't let me break your realtionship, be happy together.

ok, so i have been turned down for five, count em, five full time jobs this past month, that does not help much i can tell ya that, yeah i bet you people did not know that, you just knew about the tree planting, yea well that fell through,

onwards!

my life sucks ass, i have no set future, i have one part time job, pretty much i am a failure, mainly because i am too stupid to work shit out. the only thing i really have solid in my life is my car and it is falling apart.

time to spill some guts here Alex told me it may help

1: my mom had cancer a few years back, she had to have her thyroid removed.
2: my grandfather on my dad's side died of cancer *which makes me a high risk* and if that did not kill him his colesterol would have
3: my dad has high cholesterol, he may die soon because of it, it runs in the family. *chances are i will too*
4: my right lung always hurts, i don't know why i don't go get it checked out.
5: people make such a big deal over me not telling them my past, my past is mine, i will tell you when i damn well want to.here is some of my past
a: i had a crush on a girl named jen way back in the day, my friend matt knew, and went behind my back to date her just so i would not, the start of girl trouble.
b: i have a crush on jessica, beautiful girl, she was mormon and was not allowed to date me,
c: i have a crush on a girl named jenn, she was cool, shot me down with the famous "i like you an all, but for me to go out with you would hurt my popularity
d: ahhh Ashley B. how i miss you. my first GF, she was beautiful, a short girl, brown hair, deep brown eyes, she tanned perfectly, the first and last girl i said i love you, *other than you mom, but that's diffrent* so many great memories, some destroyed by the town. she was perfect, she liked me for who i was, speach impediment and all, i was a fat kid, and she was super skinny, she still liked me, i always wondered about her, like she was too perfect for me, like seriously, she was *in my eyes* more beautiful than anyone i had ever met and more intelligent than everyone, (she was smarter, she had like A+ average) yeah, we went out for like 2 years, (832 days and 12 hours about, we started going out on lunch at school one day, and we broke up under the pine tree in the summer her family moved away.) yeah young love, we were like 11-13, i still loved her, she was killed in a car accident though, which you would know if you read past journal entries,
e: B-Bitch, well after Ashley i sorta went solo for a long while, actaully 2 years, then playing hockey as a goalie *which was the happiest time of my life* i played like the best game ever, a bonnyville tournement in which we were playing for the gold metal against a bonnyville team which we were also playing for provincal spot. i got a shutout with alot of shots agianst me (it's sort of a blur, i got 2 concussions in the game, i was not supposed to walk off the ice after the game) so we win the game, i took a beating and still held out, and this young teen by the name of breeann was watching with her friends, she was at the room as i got off the ice, she caught my eye, i met her after i got changed and we started going out, all in all it ended as a great day, we won the tourny, i got a new GF who most guys on my team thought was hot. it was cool, about 2 months after we started going out and such i was driving through b-ville with my mom, i see breeann on a park bench making out with this other guy and pretty much fucking him, i tell her it's over.
f: heehee, Samantha, you ripped me apart... ]]> ~pyro5050 http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/549474/ http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/549474/ Mon, 17 Mar 2003 17:03:54 PST 2: no one cares right now
3: no one will ever see past my appearance and see me for who i am
4: no one will ever love me again
5: my grad pics are stupid, i look really chubby in them! literally, i have super cheeks in them
6: i am going to die soon, like within the next year
7: i have about 7 heart attacks a day! probally
8: my friends all think i am a little idiot
9: they only hang around with me cause i have a car. (cept adam, he walks everywhere!)
10: i have no reason to be on this planet anymore
11: one day i will blow myself up!
12: my parents do not even know who i am
13: my car's muffler will never be fixed! the stupid thing will always find a way to break
14: that i would have alot more blood in my body if i stoped playing with my cat (but it is so much fun!)
15: i am too shy to even talk with girls
16: i am 18, a virgin, and i intent to stay that way for a goodly time.
17: that my brain is stupid! it can't transfer what i see to words! if it could i would probally be rich!
18: no one will ever know everything about me
19: if i stoped caring about people the world would collapse
20: i have 20 things that only part of them are probally true. ]]> ~pyro5050 http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/539896/ http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/539896/ Wed, 12 Mar 2003 16:33:25 PST i am a little distraught at how little people actaully look at my stuff, i have no idea why so little poeple read poems, i read other people's poems all the time! poetry is one of the greatest forms of exspression! DAMN IT PEOPLE! SMARTEN UP!!!

oh and i don't know, no one cares about me, but i care about them, so it's all good. bye now ]]> ~pyro5050 http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/536174/ http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/536174/ Mon, 10 Mar 2003 19:22:53 PST i am going to write some more stuff and translate some of the other poems i have writen so i can post them, now some of them are pretty personal and about people who may be reading them, so just a warning if you are going to read some of my poems people i know! alright? ]]> ~pyro5050 http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/534120/ http://pyro5050.deviantart.com/journal/534120/ Sun, 09 Mar 2003 18:50:37 PST

i honestly don't know why i use so many damn smilies, so don't tell me to stop. i had a person tell me to stop useing smilies so much, pissed me right off, anyhow back to last night,

so i was at work at the trusty liquor store, kicked ass. i did almost nothing all night. literally. i drew a little in my note pad, and i wrote some stuff that no one can read, it's really fun to fuck with people's minds. i drew a beautiful heart, ripped in two by a outside force, all across this heart was beautiful vines with leafs growing out of it. i was going to add colour to it but decided against it. back to last night more. so i get off work at 12:00pm, that's midnight right people. i go to my friends house, first thing i see, a drunken friend at the top of the stairs. so i help her to the kitchen table, and my friend ken is there too, he was taking care of her with jeff. and jeff was making sure that another one of our friends did not die in the bathroom and the guy that sorta passed out in the living room was not about to die. so we take the one from the bathroom home, i get back and the little guy who was passed out in the living room is now sitting up on the couch, looking compleatly dazed. kinda funny really but anyhow. so we take care of these people. i go down stairs and grab me 2 2 ounce shots and down them in like 2 min. disgusting shit i might add, god just talking about it makes me want to throw up. not cool.

so i do those two shots and grab a beer, go upstairs where the guy on the couch is about to leave, and the first drunk girl is trying to get more alcohol. not a smart idea. so we took the bubba of beer away and such, and as she was going to drink some more of her watered down beer (we were not about to give her straight beer now, she did almost 2 liters of beer already! and she is not a big girl) i grab that watered down beer and clean the glass, the things i do for friends. and seeing that i have not eaten all day and i have just taken up drinking again as a way to push depression away (i know it's stupid) the fast beer drinking, and then the rapid drink of watered down beer, makes my head a little spinny, but i get better in like 2 min. i go down stairs and give my car keys to a sober friend. i know i know better than to drive drunk or even after i have had one drink, but i have never been drunk before last night so i did not know what i would do. safety.

anyhow by the end of the night a guy who had not had a serious drink in like 5 years, and has not eaten anything in more than 20 hours is on his 5th beer, downed two shots, and did a smirnoff ice cooler. so i must say i was a little gone, well not a little more along the lines of totally but that's not the point! so the reason i started this drinking is stated in my last journal entry,*the one that is middle of october, the 14th to be precise and at 3:15,* so i sit down with one of my friends, jeff to be precise, he was being really weird last night, not his normal self, and we were talking, i forget what he was saying, the whole drinking a little too much deally, but what ever he was saying just fucking broke me down. i think i was bitching him out for being a ass to his girlfriend, and that he should not take her forgranted because she loves him and i know what it feels like to lose someone you love. and then it happened, for the first time in almost 10 years, i cried, whole fucking hearted cried. i do... ]]> ~pyro5050